Carlos Derailing

Carlos Derailing is a major character who appears in: Adventures of Carlos Derailing, and Shadows of Visvara.
A charismatic top shagger, who is only looking for a good time.
== Appearance ==
Carlos Derailing has somewhat dark skin and curly brown hairs. He wears a green jacket with the Mexican flag on it, pants with love hearts on them, although he later gets some the say "sexy beast" on them and green slippers. He's quite scrawny, so he draws muscles on his chest and he wears prescription glasses, but later ditches them to wear glasses that says "Sexy Dude" on it.
== Synopsis ==
=== History ===
Carlos has been working in the drug dealing business for some time, although he's notorious for being really shit at his job, as he will openly admit to people what he's doing, as well as explaining the full process of how he executes his tasks.
=== Adventures of Carlos Derailing - Chapter 1: A Fat Woman ===
Carlos Derailing walked into the village of Pasgo and saw an incredibly fat woman on a bench. He went over to her and tried to woo her into couitous, but failed and was sent on a mission to get her groceries, so he took the list and started his quest. Firstly, Carlos went to the nearby clothing store and went to the people working there, Jerry and Matthew. He showed off his slick style and they were like, "this guy is so cool!", so Carlos showed them his list of groceries, but they didn't have anything, so they called Jessica over and she was eating a tuna mayo sandwich, which was on the list, so he asked for it in exchange for sexual favours, which she agreed to, so they went into the store room and did the dance with no underpants. When they finished, Jessica grew hungry and asked Carlos if he wanted some unbranded crisps, which he agreed to, because it was on his list too, so he got prawn cocktail (the best flavour). Then went back into the shop for a new getup, but he didn't have any money, so he just showed off his charismatic top shagger persona, and Jerry was swooned, so he got him a new outfit for free, then said his goodbyes to him. Exiting the clothing store, Carlos came across a stray dalmation, so he petted him and named him Karlos, then took him to the nearby West Side Café, where he acquired a pot of jam (another item on his list) from the vendor, Jenny. He then left and went to the bar, because he's an alcoholic, where he saw it in absolute uproar. It turned out that it was the annual Poop Stick Tournament, so Carlos entered, as a poop stick was on his list, and the reward for winning was 3 wishes being granted. He was thrown into the ring against the gnome samurai, Jim Don-hwan. The rules of Poop Stick were then explained to him. The combatants had to fight each other until the opponent was incapacitated, or had no poop left on their stick. Carlos was narrowly able to defeat Jim, but was shocked to find that there was a second round, where he'd be up against the half-orc, half-gnome barbarian, Poobles Boobles, but Carlos had to take his intermission break, where he was given a box of lunchables, but he took out the cheese, because it was on his list of groceries. After his break, the fight begun, but Boobles broke both his legs by accident with his poop hammer, so Carlos broke his arms afterward. Finally, the last battle begun between Carlos Derailing and Damn Daniel. Daniel struck first, but Carlos dodged and wiped poo on his white vans, so Daniel dropped his poop stick to clean it, so Carlos took it and wiped off all the poop. Ashamed of his loss, Damn Daniel became Damned Daniel. Carlos won the tournament and was allowed to keep his poop stick and he was awarded a poop stick trophy. For his first wish, Carlos wanted to be irresistible to women, but the bartender wasn't magic, so he couldn't do that, but he did give him a pair of glasses that said "Sexy Dude" on it. For his second wish, Carlos wanted a poster with Chris Pratt on it, so the bartender got one of him nailed to a wall like Jesus. For his final wish, Carlos wanted some pants that said "Sexy Beast" on it, so the bartender took off his own and gave it to him. Leaving the bar with his dog, they went to the final store, the blacksmiths, where they found the final item on the grocery list, a rock wearing a sombrero, in addition to that, a poop covered sword also peaked his interest, so he took both to the blacksmith and asked for them in exchange for a dance, so the blacksmith told him it would depend on how good the dance was. The blacksmith busted out his recorder and started playing "My Heart Will Go On", while Carlos started his dance. In the dance, Carlos called upon Jessica and the two danced so beautifully that the blacksmith was driven to tears and said he could take anything they wanted, so he took his virginity and they had a threesome. With all the items on his grocery list, Carlos went back to the fat woman and gave her all the stuff she wanted, but she revealed she was actually a sexy witch, with a cauldron under her dress, which she took off. She quickly put all the ingredients in, except for the rock, which she just seemed to want, then stirred it together and with a large puff of purple smoke, Godzilla appeared, but he was only 5'8". Carlos wasn't exactly up for being under Godzilla's tyranny, so they agreed to have a boxing match that Friday, giving him 5 days to prepare. If Carlos won the boxing match, Godzilla would go to space for 1000 years, then come back, and he'd get to shag the sexy witch lady.
===Adventures of Carlos Derailing - Chapter 2: Fight of the Millenium ===
Friday had arrived and Carlos Derailing had been training the full week in preparation for this event. He stood opposite his opponent, Godzilla, in the ring, beside him was Jessica, who was supporting him, but the witch from the other day stood beside Godzilla. The first bell rung and the fight was fierce with blows being exchanged violently, but Carlos somehow managed to down Godzilla for the count, but he was saved by the bell in a nick of time, only for him to stumble over his own tail in the second round, causing Carlos to come out as the victor. Having lost and being a man of his word, Godzilla jumped into outer-space, where he would not return for 1000 years. The sexy witch lady then came up to Carlos in the ring and they had rough sexual intercourse right there and Jessica got involved too. After the match, Carlos returned to Jessica's house, because he was now living with her and, while in bed they agreed to be more than just main shags, so their relationship grew a little more, but she also said the he needed to get a job, so, in the morning, Carlos went to the local job centre and asked for a job, but found that the woman was blind and not very helpful, so she called for her manager, who came in and he asked for his qualification, of which Carlos had none of, so the manager, who revealed his name to be Leon Jobgiver, looked at potential qualifications Carlos could quickly acquire and stumbled on a "Professional Hentai Artist" workshop, so the two of them got a carriage to shag town. On their way there, the carriage was suddenly halted by a bear, calling himself Bear Bearington, who asked to be safely hidden with them, so Carlos hid him under his seat. Later, a group of ninjas, claiming to be with the Shimada Clan, arrived and explained that they were looking for a bear that stole a bunch of their equipment. They said that they'd reward him for any information by teaching them the Shimada shag technique, so he revealed that Bearington was in the carriage, so they grabbed him and prepared to behead him, but Carlos, not realising he doomed this bear to death intervened and said that if he could out shag someone, they'd have to leave the bear alone and still teach him the Shimada shag technique. They agreed, but if he lost he and the bear would be killed. They picked Leon to be their judge and the ninjas picked out their best shagger to face off with Carlos. The two man whores furiously showed off their lustful prowess, but Derailing ultimately came out on top. They eventually arrived in Shagtown, where Carlos Derailing took the exam for the "Professional Hentai Artist" qualification and did so incredibly well that he instantly passed, returning home with a qualification to get a job.
=== Shadows of Visvara - Chapter 11: Geller and Greene Dilemma ===
For a good while now, Carlos had been working in Shag Town as a professional hentai artist and had often visited strip clubs to acquire material for his work. He'd one day sit next to Brugur Oradall Borudash by chance and the two really hit it off, so he introduce Carlos to the Bulging Stick and Davril and they all spent the morning at the strip club. They turned out to be aiming to stop a war that was spanning the entire Central Perk district, and since Shag Town was in that area, Carlos tagged along to help them. They eventually met with Rachel Greene, who had the party assist her in being escorted to discuss something with her envious sisters, so they agreed to help, but were ambushed by ninjas, so they had to fight, where Carlos showed off his shagging powers by making all the ninjas have uncontrollable erections that debilitated their ability to fight, so they pressed on the roof, where they met with Jill and Amy Greene. Instantly, the Bulging Stick grabbed Jill Greene and threw her off the roof and jumped off to finish her off, which annoyed Carlos, so he calmed the situation down by having sex with Amy Greene to avoid conflict. In the end, Rachel Greene joined the West Side Boiz's alliance and Carlos returned to his work as a hentai artist.
== Powers & Abilities ==
=== Alright with animals init ===
He has a unique proficiency for "Animal Handling".
=== Top Shagger ===
As a "top shagger", Carlos has a unique "Shagging" proficiency, as well as one in "persuasion".
=== Shimada Shag ===
An incredible technique used exclusively for shagging that doubles his abilities in shagging.
== Relationships ==
=== Allies ===
* Jessica Vouire Jessica is Carlos' main shag, after they met each other in a clothing store she worked at.
* Karlos Carlos and his dog have a strong emotional connection.
*Sexy Witch Lady Carlos was deceived into collecting ingredients for a spell that would summon Godzilla, but he managed to beat him in a boxing match, so he and the Sexy Witch Lady shagged, with Jessica.
* West Side Boiz They became good friends at a bar once and Carlos helped them recruit Rachel Greene into their alliance to stop the Shimada Clan.
** Brugur Oradall Borudash The two of them hit it off really well, as if there was some sort of magnetic force between them that connected them spiritually.
** The Bulging Stick Carlos taught the Bulging Stick how to do the Shimada Shag, since the Bulging Stick's attempts at it were less than stellar, as a result of this, they share a respectful minor student/teacher relationship.
** Davril They worked together to recruit Rachel Greene into an alliance to stop the Shimada Clan.
** Ara They worked together to recruit Rachel Greene into an alliance to stop the Shimada Clan.
* Amy Greene They shagged.
== Gallery ==
CarlosDerailing.png|Carlos Derailing (2nd edition render)
CarlosDerailingBBPIC.png|Carlos Derailing (1st edition render)
Sudasaka Carlos.jpg|Carlos Derailing Sketch (Sudasaka)
Category:The Wavis D&D Legend
Category:Adventures of Carlos Derailing
Category:Characters
Category:Playable Characters