Train Conductor

===== If the conductor was not in the train car right now... =====
The Train Conductor was the first new original character created for The Crap Lom Universe, his first appearance being in 'Me and My Alpha Baka' means that The Woman technically created him, with Pops bringing him to life.
Throughout the Crap Lom comics and media, the Train Conductor is mostly seen during train sequences where the Crap Lom ride a train. He will not allow any rules to be broken or any romance in his train cabins and will stop any criminals that attempt to do so. It is theorised that he may be the reason that Crap Kelloggs loves riding the trains so much.
(Chris this is the bit where we just take the absolute piss and write the longest page on the wiki giving the train conductor an overly massive backstory and description.)