2018 Keeper Announcements

== Introduction ==
Quick keeper announcement post for everyone on this fine Tuesday afternoon. Work sucks (I know), so nothing special here.
== Butt Fuckers ==
No keepers. 
A couple of options for BF but nothing that would make me say "wow you passed that up?" Decker for a 9 might have been worth a shot, or even Jack Doyle at TE for a 13. Doyle is paired up with that fucking nuisance from DET, Eric Ebron, but Doyle knows the system. But passing up Doyle at 13 isn't saying much. BF will start fresh. 
Let's take a look at BF's 2012 draft, just for kicks. 
Butt Buttington 2012 Draft
8 	Ryan Mathews
13 	Maurice Jones-Drew
28 	Victor Cruz
33 	DeMarco Murray
48 	Jordy Nelson
53 	Jeremy Maclin
68 	Eli Manning
73 	Roy Helu Jr.
88 	Jason Witten
93 	Green Bay
108	Dan Carpenter
113	Philip Rivers
128	Greg Little
133	Denarius Moore
148	James Starts
153	Ronnie Hillman
Rivers in the 12th and Witten in the 9th is fucking hilarious because that's exactly where they were drafted by JarJar Stinks! last season. If he'd taken those two it would have been like he kept those two players for five fucking years. 
Let's move on from Butt stuff and get to actual keeper announcements. 
== Sweet Dee ==
6th - JuJu Smith-Schuster 
15th - Andrew Luck
The Andrew Luck move is smart and JuJu's ADP is 41 so a bargain for him.
== ma ma momma said ==
5th - Jay Ajayi
11th - Matthew Stafford
Jared choosing to build his 2018 campaign around the same headaches from his 2017 campaign is a bold choice, but on the bright side we're not him so we shouldn't have to worry about it. 
== Papa's Posse ==
6th - Zach Ertz
7th - Adam Thielen
Especially if Ertz continues the performance we've seen from him since the last quarter of the 2016 season, this is a great keeper group for Papa. Two strong WR's picked well under their ADP (39 for Ertz, 32 for Thielen). Missing two picks in a row will also give him a nice few minutes to regroup between the elite player stage and the post-elite player stage of the draft. 
== Duck Punchers ==
5th - Kareem Hunt
6th - Josh Gordon
Another solid duo of keepers. Obviously you cannot pass up Kareem Hunt 40 picks under his ADP, and DP also has two 5th round picks. The 5th round produced Hunt, Mark Ingram, Larry Fitzgerald, and Jarvis Landry last season. 
As for Gordon, well he might be on the mend but Duck Punchers has no 6th or 7th round pick and by law that means Gordon will instead cost the next available pick, which is an 8. This means he will be eligible as a 7th round keeper in 2019 but it also means that Duck will go almost four full rounds without an actual pick. 
== Paddock 9 ==
3rd - Keenan Allen
6th - Stefon Diggs
P9 makes a shocking decision not to keep Christian McCaffrey for a 2nd round pick. Maybe the thought process is that P9 will be able to nab him in that round, as his ADP is 16, whereas there is no chance he gets Allen or Diggs in their respective rounds. However, the way this league is obsessed with scrappy white RB's and WR's, I say there is no chance P9 gets his man. 
== Garoppoblow Me ==
6th - Alvin Kamara
14th - Michael Thomas
The undefeated keeper champ is at it again. With no 6th and no 14th or 15th round picks, GBM takes Kamara (ADP 6) and Thomas (ADP 15) somewhere around picks 64 and 164. It feels so good to be bad. Now we just hope that the week they're both on the bye that I don't face Shotti.
== Pain Train WOO WOO ==
6th - Davante Adams
6th - Jerick McKinnon
Since we have two 6th rounders, the TRUE 6th will be Davante Adams since he was actually drafted by PT last season. McKinnon moves to the next available pick (the 7th). These two guys might not be as flashy as a Kamara or a Diggs but they are headlining their positions on their current rosters so I think this has the potential to be a great keeper batch for Pain Train. 
== RIPDab ==
12th - Tevin Coleman
15th - Julian Edelman
 A monkey wrench was thrown in RIPDabs plans when both Ingram and Edelman went down to suspensions to start the season. The perennial playoff contender, RIP must feel a bit of competition with Butt possibly resurrecting the Even Year Curse. He was not content to wait until October to be at full power, so instead of Ingram, Dab is electing to take Coleman in the 12th.
== The Shotti Bunch ==
8th - Melvin Gordon
10th - Marvin Jones Jr.
 While many are keeping free agents in the 6th, Shotti is grabbing supreme talent in the 8th and 10th rounds. Gordon slowed a little in 2017, but will hope to pick up the pace on Shotti's squad for the third year in a row. Plus, last year's surprise breakout on Detroit was Marvin Jones Jr. He outshined Tate in his matchup against GBM and will hope to continue dominance as possible WR2 or WR3, depending on who Shotti elects to take with his first few picks.