Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High

Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High
Patrick falls for his new teacher, while Squidward becomes a teacher himself.
Season: 4 Episode: 2
Total Episode Count: 52
Prod. no.: 4ACX02
Featuring: Patrick, Squidward, Mrs. Lockhart
Also Appearing: Plankton, Pearl, Sandy, SpongeBob, Greased-up Deaf Guy, Ms. Clifton, Barbara Winsky, Principal Sloan, Janya, Ted Danson, Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Vincent van Gogh, Donny Osmond, Marie Osmond, Mary Steenburgen
Plot: When Patrick's beloved teacher wins the lottery and quits, Sandy suggests Squidward fill in as a substitute. He enjoys the job but is moved to another class for troubled kids and unintentionally teaches them to aspire to low-level jobs.
Meanwhile, Patrick is instantly smitten with his new teacher, Mrs. Lockhart. Sandy is not pleased with this. After she and SpongeBob talk to Mrs. Lockhart, she promises to be with Patrick if he kills her husband, though he does not do it. When Sandy finds the teacher's written instructions in Patrick's laundry, she and Plankton conspire to cover up the plot. Back at home, the rest of the family treat Patrick differently because they thought he actually killed Mrs. Lockhart's husband, until it is shown on the news that it was really Mrs. Lockhart and a sea bear.
In the last scene, Mrs. Lockart and the sea bear are found in a motel, with Mrs. Lockhart all dressed up for a nice evening dinner while the bear is lying on the bed watching television. She sits down on the side of the bed while the bear taps her with his left foot and with a satirical but somewhat loving manner says "Love you," and with that, the episodes concludes.
==Cutaways==
#Everything Pearl needs
#Ted Danson & Mary Steenburgen
#You Can't Do That On Television
#Ben Affleck & Matt Damon
#Things Patrick has done for Squidward
#SpongeBob makes a water slide
#Vincent van Gogh
#Plankton obtains a condom
#Donny Osmond & Marie Osmond
#No one as stupid as SpongeBob
#"Merry Old Land of Oz"
#Wonder Twins
==Trivia==
*All non-English-language versions of this episode shorten the title of this episode to "Fast Times".
==Deleted Scenes==
#"Low Level Man" (song)
==Rating==
TV-14: DLSV
==Gallery==
Pr.png|French title card
KT.png|Japanese title card
Tr.png|Spanish title card
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