Starshards/Chapter 2

??? 	Good morning, water spirit.
Wet Balloon 	...huh? Where am I?
Wet Balloon squints in the darkness, seeing nothing but a blurry figure.	Wet Balloon squints in the darkness, seeing nothing but a blurry figure.
??? 	Do not be afraid. This is your personal void... your body is still in Flowda Co, but your mind is currently here.
Wet Balloon 	Who are you?
??? 	...you're lost, aren't you?
Wet Balloon 	I mean, yes. I am very lost. But I've got some friends that'll take me home.
??? 	You're in great danger. Somebody is not being truthful.
Wet Balloon 	...what?
??? 	Do not trust anybody. You need my help as much as I need yours. You're the only one I can connect to... your soul is attuned to my Shards...
Wet Balloon 	Well, I'm not stupid, probably. Is this even safe?
??? 	We are both prisoners... you are no less safer with me than you would be with the others. We both find ourselves in danger.
Wet Balloon 	From what? Worm? The Sapphire?
??? 	There are those that seek to misuse the comet's power. You can see through their facades better than most... that's why I need you to trust me.
Wet Balloon 	...Am I like, the chosen one, or something?
??? 	...
Wet Balloon 	Is that a yes?
??? 	If it will make you happy, then, sure. Let's go with that.
Wet Balloon 	Yippie!
??? 	You will follow the path... soon enough, you will meet with my last servant. Together we will prevent the Shards' uprising. Once my place is restored, you will have a place in the seas, where I will assure your return...
Wet Balloon 	The ocean!? For real!? I can finally go there!?
??? 	Have we reached an agreement?
Wet Balloon 	Uhhh... sure.
The void starts to shake. 	The void starts to shake.
??? 	Hmm... there is a disturbance. It seems we must part ways, for now. I hope we may meet again. Most importantly... tell nobody. If you breach our deal, if listening voices know, it is all over. Now, make haste.
Wet Balloon 	Wait, but I don't even know who you are!
??? 	...yes, I suppose it is time we get acquainted. My name is-
Prunemaster 	WETTY BALLOON! BALLOON! GET UP!
Wet Balloon wakes up in Flowda Co storage room, in a set of hammocks. 	Wet Balloon wakes up in Flowda Co storage room, in a set of hammocks.
OwOrange 	Wwakey wwakey, bwood and bwakey!
Prunemaster 	(starts shaking them violently) AWAKEN OR WE WILL HAVE TO EAT YOU!!!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Hey, get off! We've discussed this! No eating!
Wet Balloon 	Okaaaay, I'm awake! And I was having this super weird dream, too! You ruined it!
Poffer Lord 	Weird, huh? I'd love to know. They all mean something cryptic, you know.
Wet Balloon 	Well, I was in this- uh... bouncy castle. And there were bowls of chilli bouncing everywhere. Oh dear, what a mess!
Poffer Lord 	I see. I've heard that signifies feelings of... utter despair.
Wet Balloon 	Gee, you hit the nail on the head. I'm in utter despair right now.
Tam 	Hmph. You're the last to wake up. I wanted to draw on your... face... wherever it is...
Taxi 	He also wanted to dunk you in a bowl of warm water.
Wet Balloon 	A whole bowl just for me? That's so sweet...
Tam 	No, it's not! It's a prank!
Poffer Lord 	At least we're all well-rested. Who here got plenty of sleep?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Well, there was plenty of loud machinery. And I had to stop the fruits from eating me every hour or so.
OwOrange 	We're kinda qwirky like thwat.
Taxi 	Well, I slept like a lump of metal. Haha.
Sinigi 	Always with the metal puns, huh?
Taxi 	Don't act so wooden.
Sinigi 	STOP.
Taxi 	Hey, you'll get a handle on the problem.
Sinigi 	SHUT UP!!! (hides behind MR Z BRAINZ) The Magnetoid is BULLYING me again!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Ah, you don't have to be so... sign...ish... about it. Dammit.
Taxi 	Yeah, I'm done. Let's go.
Tam 	Honestly. You people just love to waste time.
Poffer Lord 	We should probably check in on S.O.D.A before we leave.
CosTan 	Mr S.O.D.A is currently busy.
Poffer Lord 	AGH- How long have you been standing there!?
CosTan 	All night.
MR Z BRAINZ 	You watched us sleep?
CosTan 	Yes.
Sinigi 	The robot is creepy, what's new?
CosTan 	I also recorded.
Taxi 	Just stop talking. Thanks.
Costan 	(starts handing out paper bags) Anyway, I prepared a packed lunch for all of you. They're nutritionally balanced and contain your five fruit a day.
Prunemaster 	(slams the paper bag away) WHAT THE HECK, DUDE!?
CosTan 	Don't worry, they're vegan.
Prunemaster 	Oh okay. Sorry.
Tam 	Okay, but where's the soda guy?
CosTan 	Like I said, he is currently preoccupied. But he wishes you a safe journey.
Tam 	Aw. I wanted a free sample.
CosTan 	(sighs and hands him a bottle of Flow Soda)
Tam 	Ey, thanks. (opens it)
Poffer Lord 	(grabs it from Tam) NO!
Tam 	Who do you think you are? My dad?
CosTan 	If you are ready to proceed, I have parked the taxi outside.
Taxi 	Alright, we're back on the road! Come on, let's go!
Sinigi 	A new journey! The sights and smells of the Sud Kingdom await!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Well, you two seem psyched up.
Sinigi 	You're not excited?
MR Z BRAINZ 	I'm late for work! They'll probably dock my pay, and I was already on minimum wage!
Poffer Lord 	Yeah, but you want to save the world, right?
MR Z BRAINZ 	What are we gonna do afterward? I still need a living wage...
Prunemaster 	(places a hand on his shoulder) Hey, it'll be okay. We'll just buy and eat you.
MR Z BRAINZ 	That's comforting.
CosTan 	If you may, follow me. You have a long day ahead of you.
Tam 	(turns around and looks at Wet Balloon) Hey, you coming?
Wet Balloon 	...oh, yeah! Sorry.
The group pack their things and leave the factory, ready to journey to their next adventure.	The group pack their things and leave the factory, ready to journey to their next adventure.
==Gushing Foam, Great Entertainment==
The taxi pulls over by a beach, close to some busy docks. 	The taxi pulls over by a beach, close to some busy docks.
MR Z BRAINZ 	*breathing heavily* There is... totally not enough room... for all of us... in this car...
Prunemaster 	Seems like a you issue to me. I have plenty of room.
Sinigi 	(muffled) Your rotund purple mass is squishing me into the seat!
Tam 	Ah, the benefits of being intangible...
Wet Balloon 	(shaking from side to side) I'm so unbelievably hyped for this.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Stop... shaking the car...
Poffer Lord 	Hang on for a while longer, guys. We'll have plenty of room on the boat.
Taxi 	Boat?
Poffer Lord 	Well, the Sud Kingdom is in the water, yes? We can buy a ticket for the underwater ferry over there on the docks.
Taxi 	No, no, no, we're not taking any boat. I'm terrible with boats.
Sinigi 	Then how are we supposed to get through the water, metalhead?
Taxi 	Easy. We're driving.
Poffer Lord 	...into the water...?
Taxi 	Uh-huh, to the bottom of the ocean.
Poffer Lord 	...you're going to drive directly into the ocean.
Taxi 	Yep. Is any part of this confusing to you?
Poffer Lord 	Hmm... how about the part where you're going to DRIVE DIRECTLY INTO THE OCEAN.
Wet Balloon 	I mean, I'm totally on board.
MR Z BRAINZ 	I... have some concerns...
Taxi 	Concerns ignored! Let's do this!
Taxi presses on the gas, sending the car careening down the beach and off of the dock. 	Taxi presses on the gas, sending the car careening down the beach and off of the dock.
Taxi 	Remember to keep those windows closed!
MR Z BRAINZ 	...you really just drove into the ocean.
The car sinks like a stone. 	The car sinks like a stone.
MR Z BRAINZ 	...and this is how I double-die. In a rapidly sinking car with some of the worst people I've ever met. Awesome.
Tam 	Heh, zombie-man over here needs to breathe.
Poffer Lord 	...I sorta need to breathe as well. Is there gonna be enough oxygen in here?
Taxi 	Eh, probably. Not really my area of expertise.
Wet Balloon 	*pressed against the window* IT'S AS BEAUTIFUL AS I IMAGINED.
Sinigi 	I've breathed less oxygen in that pile of Shards way back then, so I'm not stressing.
MR Z BRAINZ 	So to get things straight, about half of the people in here don't even need to breathe...?
Prunemaster 	I dunno if I need to breathe, but I guess we can find out!
Tam 	Breathing is for wimps.
Taxi 	It's a you problem.
Wet Balloon 	WATER.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Cool, cool. I'm gonna sit over here and try not to have a panic attack.
Prunemaster 	OwOrange, pass me the camcorder!
OwOrange 	(sleeping soundly) Zzzz... uwu...
Poffer Lord 	How can you sleep through this!?
Taxi 	Chill out, I'll put the radio on.
RADIO 	"I am drowning, drowning, drowning in love-"
Taxi 	(changes the station)
RADIO 	"Blue blue water stretching on for forever-"
Taxi 	(changes the station)
RADIO 	"I am 1000 miles below the sea-"
Taxi 	(switches the radio off) Today's music, huh?
The taxi shudders. 	The taxi shudders.
Poffer Lord 	AH!
Tam 	...did we land?
Taxi 	That was a floating rock. Poffer Lord, you scream like a girl.
Poffer Lord 	AND YOU'RE A PIECE OF STARDUST! THIS IS INCREDIBLY UNSAFE!
Taxi 	You can open the door and step out if you're bothered.
Wet Balloon 	I'd love to get all close and personal with the ocean, actually, go ahead...
Poffer Lord 	(sigh) Just... it won't take long to reach the Sud Kingdom, right?
Taxi 	Of course not.
5 MINUTES LATER 	5 MINUTES LATER
Sinigi 	So, guess who was wro-
Taxi 	It's been five minutes. This does NOT constitute as long.
Sinigi 	Hmph. We'll see. But I am bored, though.
Wet Balloon 	Come and look at the water! It's life-changing!
Sinigi 	You're quite the eccentric one, aren't you?
Wet Balloon 	Nuh-uh. I was something of a model citizen back in Balloonia.
Tam 	That place up in the clouds, right? Where all you weird balloon guys live?
Wet Balloon 	It's perfect! My apartment's so cosy. Curfew's at a generous 9pm. The lemonade is endless. There are sports programs. The people are really nice - and anyone who is mean goes on holiday, so we don't see them anymore!
Poffer Lord 	And they won't want you back after everything you're doing with us.
Wet Balloon 	I'm sure I can smooth things over with Good Wood when all is said and done. Besides, my friends all love me! They'd be begging for me to come back! Ah, I miss Dry Balloon, and Hot Balloon, and Cold Balloon, and Electric Balloon, and even that weirdo Windy Balloon... we were quite a gang back in the day.
30 MINUTES LATER 	30 MINUTES LATER
Wet Balloon 	...and then Dry Balloon said "Poem? I barely know em!" and I think we were all in agreement that was the funniest thing anyone had ever said on Poetry Wednesdays...
Tam 	I'd love to hear more, but... shut the ever-loving star up.
Prunemaster 	Jokes, huh? I've got a goodie! So, a Florican golfer walks into a bar...
30 MINUTES LATER 	30 MINUTES LATER
Prunemaster 	...and then they SHOT THE DOG!
Wet Balloon 	NOOOOOO!
MR Z BRAINZ 	...on second thoughts, this is worse than double-death...
Poffer Lord 	You holding up okay, Brainz?
MR Z BRAINZ 	No... I think I've discovered a way to feel carsick and seasick at the same time...
Sinigi 	So, like, do all zombies have stupid names like Brainz?
MR Z BRAINZ 	It's not stupid. We have a, like, cultural connection to brains or something...
Sinigi 	You told me your name was Brainz Z Brainz.
Taxi 	That is confusing. Same first name as your last name. What do they call you in the doctor's office? Brainz Brainz? Have we got a double-Brainz here?
Prunemaster 	Double-brainz! Double-brainz! Brainz Squared! Brainz to the power of two!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Ugh, fine. I'm not really Brainz Z Brainz. It's just easier to introduce myself that way.
OwOrange 	(still sleeping soundly) Sugoi... Zzzzzz...
MR Z BRAINZ 	Look, it's... Violet... Violet Z Brainz... but apparently all the other zombies found it a great opportunity to laugh and call me names like "flower-boy", so... I just started introducing myself as MR Z BRAINZ. It's as simple as that.
Tam 	Yeah, it's totally cool, Vio.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Okay, I shouldn't have said anything...
Sinigi 	We make fun of you anyway, so, like, does it even matter?
Poffer Lord 	I mean, I can relate. Once I put on the cloak, I'm just Poffer Lord, you know? Don't need to worry about any prior identity or anything.
Tam 	Say, if we're sharing secrets, who wants to know how I got my killer powers?
Wet Balloon 	Ooh!
MR Z BRAINZ 	I'm not actually too interested. Is this gonna be another one of those 30-minute intervals?
Tam 	So, it all started when I was KIDNAPPED by an evil scientist, who experimented on me with Shards to turn my body to pure malleable mush. The process was a failure, and I died - but came back as a super-powered GHOST - and from there, I set about plotting my revenge...
30 MINUTES LATER 	30 MINUTES LATER
Taxi 	...and then I ended up walking into a taxi-driving class by mistake! I saw the signpost with my name on it and thought it was the entrance to those ballet lessons my parents signed me up for. My first language is reverbing metal sonar, so I was kinda new to reading things...
Poffer Lord 	...Magnetoid ballet? Aren't you all, you know, a bit too... made of metal?
Taxi 	That's besides the point.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Huh? Weren't we talking about Tam?
Tam 	I wrapped my story up 2 minutes in. I'm not a talker. Did you zone out or something?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Just the nausea clouding my thoughts.
Wet Balloon 	Say, is there a bathroom in this thing? I could really do with a bath.
Taxi 	We'll be there soon enough. Everyone hasn't finished telling their stories yet. Who's up next?
Prunemaster 	Me! Me! Who wants to hear about the time me and OwOrange fought for our lives in Florica and escaped with four extra limbs? Here's a spoiler - they didn't belong to us!
Poffer Lord 	Pass.
Sinigi 	Oh, so nobody's gonna ask to hear Sinigi's story, huh? Nobody?
Taxi 	Sorry, you can go ahead.
Sinigi 	Gladly! Get ready to get your 30-minute intervals ROCKED! The grand tale of Sinigi all starts-
The taxi hits the ocean floor. Before them is the gates of the Sud Kingdom. 	The taxi hits the ocean floor. Before them is the gates of the Sud Kingdom.
Taxi 	Oooooh, sorry. Seems like we're fresh out of time.
OwOrange 	(wakes up with yawn) Awh... awh we thwere yet...?
Prunemaster 	WE ARE! YOU MISSED MY FLORICAN GOLFER JOKE!
OwOrange 	IT'S NOT FWUNNY!
Poffer Lord 	Alright, everyone, best behaviour. The Suddlites are very particular about manners. I'll do the talking.
Taxi 	(eyeless glare)
Poffer Lord 	...Taxi will do the talking.
Wet Balloon 	This was probably the best collection of 30-minute intervals of my life.
Poffer Lord 	Trust me, it'll get better. The Sud Kingdom is very clean. And moist. And all the other things that bubbles are.
Prunemaster 	They're gonna LOVE us.
MR Z BRAINZ 	I never want to set foot in this taxi ever again.
The taxi drives forward and passes into an air bubble checkpoint, stopping by a booth operated by a bubble guard. 	The taxi drives forward and passes into an air bubble checkpoint, stopping by a booth operated by a bubble guard.
Gubble Guard 	...(yawn) Speak, peons. What is thy business?
Poffer Lord 	(winds down the window) We doth arrive to seek an audience with the king, my squire. Wilt thou art let us through, prithee? Imminently?
Gubble Guard 	...okay, look, that's completely wrong and frankly quite offensive. You know what? Let's just drop the old-timey speech, I'm not paid enough to keep this up. Tourists enter through the underwater ferry system. You can't just drive up in some dingy taxi and underwater waltz on through, bub.
Poffer Lord 	It's really quite urgent, sir. We're here on a mission to protect your kingdom from the Order of the Sapphire, and I-
Gubble Guard 	I'm not paid enough to listen either. Look, I'm gonna need to see some ID. Do you have your passports with you?
Taxi 	And allow the feds to know who I am? No!
Prunemaster 	Don't worry, guys. I've got one. (reaches into somewhere unexplained and takes out a passport, passing it through the window) I hope you'll find everything is up to code, officer.
Gubble Guard 	(he reads it) ...for the love of all that is sudsy... ...how do you have this many travel bans...
Prunemaster 	Yeah, pretty cool, huh?
Gubble Guard 	How can you be banned from 9828379 galaxies!? Interstellar travel doesn't even exist!
OwOrange 	Hwehe, it's a lwooooong storwy.
Prunemaster 	It's like stamp-collecting for us.
Gubble Guard 	(slowly passes the passport back and pumps a generous dollop of hand sanitizer onto his hands) That's the biggest red flag I've ever seen. I'm gonna give you folks to the count of five to skebubble on up out of here, or I'm calling the police.
Tam 	Are we gonna have to pop a bubble tonight, bub?
Gubble Guard 	My life is short and miserable. You would be doing me a favour.
Sinigi 	Hey, listen! Violence is never the answer! Except for when there's a health bar below you and the other guy. Then it's probably the answer.
MR Z BRAINZ 	You've really grown, Sinigi.
Tam 	A wuh bar? A huh? Wha?
Sinigi 	You can see it too, right? The words and stuff?
Gubble Guard 	(reaches for a button on the wall) Five... four... three...
Wet Balloon 	W-wait! Hang on! Can we... see the souvenir shop, at least?
Gubble Guard 	...a Balloon? You're Balloonian?
Wet Balloon 	...uh, yes... ...yeah! Yes, I am! A very important Balloonian ambassador, to be exact! And if you don't let us through, the Good Wood will be hearing very poor words about this kingdom!
Gubble Guard 	You expect me to believe that?
Wet Balloon 	Yeah.
Gubble Guard 	...and if you're lying and I let you through...
Wet Balloon 	You're a goner. You're done for.
Gubble Guard 	...and if you're telling the truth and I don't let you through...
Wet Balloon 	You're done for. You're a goner.
Gubble Guard 	I'm not paid enough to deal with this dilemma.
Wet Balloon 	You're really not.
Taxi 	You're gonna open the gate.
Gubble Guard 	I'm gonna open the gate. (pulls the lever)
MR Z BRAINZ 	You're gonna take some time off.
Gubble Guard 	I'm gonna take some time off.
Taxi 	You're gonna tell your wife how much you love her.
Gubble Guard 	I don't have a wife.
Taxi 	You're gonna tell your husband how much you love him.
Gubble Guard 	I don't have a husband either.
Sinigi 	You're gonna put yourself out there and do something with your life.
Gubble Guard 	I will. I promise.
Wet Balloon 	We love you.
Gubble Guard 	(sniff) I love you guys too...
The gate is fully opened and the taxi speeds away. 	The gate is fully opened and the taxi speeds away.
Taxi 	(distant) Each moment is worth living!
MR Z BRAINZ 	...
Sinigi 	...
Tam 	...
Prunemaster 	What the dust was that?
Taxi 	What?
Prunemaster 	That.
Poffer Lord 	Well, the Suddlites are very emotionally fragile. They can be persuaded easily.
Taxi 	That and my wage-slave mind tricks.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Let's all agree to not bring any of that up again.
Taxi finds somewhere to park before the group step out and take in the sights of the kingdom, an underwater city protected by an airtight bubble dome with gushing waterfalls, spires and markets as far as the eye can see.	Taxi finds somewhere to park before the group step out and take in the sights of the kingdom, an underwater city protected by an airtight bubble dome with gushing waterfalls, spires and markets as far as the eye can see.
Poffer Lord 	Here we are, everyone! The big city!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Thank the stars we're out of that vehicle... ugh...
Prunemaster 	Feels... moist. I hate that word.
Wet Balloon 	Well, I like it. And I got us the ticket in here, so my opinion's objectively right.
Prunemaster 	Can't argue with that! (begins to lick the ground) YUMMY! IT'S ALL SOAP!
Taxi 	Seems like the architecture is all soap, too.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(slips flat and faceplants into the ground) Wonderful. Just what I needed.
Poffer Lord 	Try not to slip while you're at it. In the Sud Kingdom, the soap drops YOU.
Tam 	(snickers) "Try not to slip..."
Sinigi 	(snickers with him)
Poffer Lord 	Stay focused. We're not here to lick the soap. We're here to warn the king.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(still on the ground) I'm not trying to lick the soap. The soap is licking me.
Poffer Lord 	Well, that's the Sud Kingdom for you. On your feet.
MR Z BRAINZ 	And I still feel ill.
Taxi 	It's the air pressure. We can't slide all the way to the castle, can we?
MR Z BRAINZ 	I could give it a shot.
Wet Balloon 	(sinks to the ground) Me too!
Prunemaster 	(flops to the ground) Beats walking.
Tam 	Darn it...
Sinigi 	"Try not to slip." Not so funny now, huh...
Poffer Lord 	Okay, but you're gonna have to be careful. The people here are bubbles. They're not just emotionally fragile, they're physically fragile. And we don't want to draw the ire of-
Trubble Gubb 	(jumps in, pulling out a knife) GIMMIE YOUR WALLETS! NOW!
Poffer Lord 	WE'LL COOPERATE! WE'LL COOPERATE!
Prunemaster 	... (pokes him)
Trubble Gubb 	(explodes)
MR Z BRAINZ 	You just killed that guy.
Prunemaster 	Yea. Sorry, go on.
Poffer Lord 	...ahem. Sorry. Well... their economy is in shambles, I suppose.
OwOrange 	How cwome?
Poffer Lord 	It's a bubble economy.
Taxi 	Obviously.
Sinigi 	I hate you.
Poffer Lord 	We'll have to be on the lookout for thieves, vagabonds and hooligans. Let's go! ...or slide. Whatever you prefer.
11: Trouble with the Bubbles 	11: Trouble with the Bubbles
Area:Sud Kingdom Streets 	The pristine streets are crawling with the undesirables... who are anyone that we personally don't like!
Enemies:Suddlite Thieves, Suddlite Vagabonds, Suddlite Hooligans	Playable Characters:MR Z BRAINZ, Wet Balloon, Poffer Lord, Taxi, Tam, Prunemaster + OwOrange
The group, out of breath and considerably slippery, end up outside the castle gates. Looking up, they see the grounds of the Sud Kingdom’s castle, which is unsurprisingly mainly comprised of soap-bricks.	The group, out of breath and considerably slippery, end up outside the castle gates. Looking up, they see the grounds of the Sud Kingdom’s castle, which is unsurprisingly mainly comprised of soap-bricks.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(slides across the ground) My face hurts... and there’s-
Poffer Lord 	Yes, yes, and there’s soap in my eyes. Get over it. We ALL have soap in our eyes. That’s HOW IT WORKS HERE.
Taxi 	(snickers) "soap in our eyes…"
Poffer Lord 	If you could stop complaining about everything for once, we can focus on our diplomatic skills for now. I have this whole thing planned out. We’re gonna go in, and… uh… talk to the king... and he’s gonna... well...
MR Z BRAINZ 	...
Tam 	You didn’t plan anything, did ya?
Poffer Lord 	I like to give off the impression that I have...
Tam 	And yet you're always trying to take the lead. Funny how that goes.
Poffer Lord 	What?
Wet Balloon 	Relax, relax. It’s gonna go fine. I’ll just say I’m a Balloonia ambassador again, and we can do the whole slavey-wagey mindy-twisty stuff Taxi knows.
Prunemaster 	AND IF IT DOESN’T WORK, WE CAN KILL THEM!
OwOrange 	Or turn on the kawaii chwarm ;)
Poffer Lord 	No, seriously, what do you mean, "funny how that goes"?
Tam 	I'm just saying you talk too much for someone that doesn't know a stardamm thing about anything, kid.
Poffer Lord 	Kid!? Aren't you, like, twelve or something? I don't see you doing anything to help the team.
Tam 	Forget about it. Let's just get this thing done so we can go home.
Wet Balloon 	Okey-dokey!
Wet Balloon rushes forward and headbutts a large door. A small slit opens. 	Wet Balloon rushes forward and headbutts a large door. A small slit opens.
Dubble Doorman 	Is this the ZEN deliveryman? I told you to go around the back door… eugh, no, it’s just some foreigners.
Wet Balloon 	(doing a bad high-class accent) Ello, ello, slave of wage. I am an upper-class Balloonian ambassador seeking urgent audience with the king. You will be executed if you don’t comply. Peas and thank you.
Taxi 	A-and we love you and your life has meaning!
Dubble Doorman 	Wha...? ...oh. Right. Look, I don’t know what you did to Keith over at the border, but you can’t just slide in here and talk to our king. We have rules.
Sinigi 	Uh… go and get married?
Dubble Doorman 	You know, that whole spiel only worked because my buddy Keith’s going through a real hard time right now, and you really had to go and push him over the edge. I don’t know where he went… he hung up his uniform, handed in his two weeks notice and everything. I’m kinda worried about him.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Damm, that sucks.
Prunemaster 	TIME FOR PLAN B! (lunges towards the door)
Poffer Lord 	(grabs Prunemaster) No! No killing!
Prunemaster 	(hisses and scratches his face)
Poffer Lord 	AGH! STARDAMMIT, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?
Dubble Doorman 	...control your cat, please.
OwOrange 	Pwan C! Sweduction! (ahem) ...Nya~
Dubble Doorman 	Control both of your cats.
Prunemaster 	We don’t have any cats. Not anymore.
Poffer Lord 	He means you two. Ugh... am I bleeding...?
Tam 	I don't know. You should tell me. You're the one that knows everything.
Sinigi 	(turns to Prunemaster and OwOrange) Both of your plans SUCK, by the way.
MR Z BRAINZ 	They're trying their best. They’re just a little quirky. (whispers to Prunemaster) Please, please behave. I don’t want the others to think I’ve recruited a pair of nutjobs.
Prunemaster 	Well, bad news. We’re mavericks. We don’t play by the rules. If you gotta problem with that, you shoulda left us in that cave with Mr Grapefruit!
Wet Balloon 	Mr Grapefruit, huh? Is he cute like you two?
Prunemaster 	Nah he’s an ugly ass robot
Wet Balloon 	Oh...! That’s even better!
Poffer Lord 	(sigh) ...look, this is urgent. An organisation known as the Order of the Sapphire is going to destroy this kingdom and steal the Elemental Core. You need to alert the king immediately.
Dubble Doorman 	And you expect me to believe that?
Wet Balloon 	Again, you have to! Consider the scenarios. If we’re telling the truth and you let us in… you’re done for! You’re a... wait... hang on... no... no, that’s not right... uh...
Dubble Doorman 	I appreciate the enthusiasm, but we simply cannot have any interruptions. The king is exceedingly busy. There are matters of the utmost importance that must be attended to. The jesters perform in an hour and he absolutely does not want to miss that. So I’m gonna have to say... bubble off. Or I’m calling the cops.
The slit slams with a thud. 	The slit slams with a thud.
Prunemaster 	(pulls out a bomb) PLAN D! PIPE BOMB!
Poffer Lord 	(grabs it) STOP!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Well, that was a flop. Glad we can work together as a team to collectively suck. How about we call it quits?
Taxi 	Call it quits? It’s not like you to be pessimistic.
Sinigi 	We’ve been together for the longest, and trust me, it’s typical.
Taxi 	It’s... sarcasm...
Sinigi 	Guess it’s hard to read your expression! A-HA! TAKE THAT!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Look, you heard the guy! We’re not getting in. Our usual tricks won’t work here. They’re not receptive to witty, gag-filled banter that makes us quirky yet charming. And as far as I’m concerned, that’s our ace in the hole.
Poffer Lord 	Alright, new plan. We're gonna-
Tam 	How about you let somebody else decide the plan for once?
Poffer Lord 	Because you don't know what to do, alright!? You'll just say we should go and beat people up! That's all you ever talk about!
Tam 	Yeah, and look what that's gotten me. Fame, glory, and power. What have you got? A smelly cloak? You're too much of a coward to even show your face.
Poffer Lord 	Coward!? I... ...hey, remember who beat you in the tournament!
Tam 	What, in a four-against-one? Yeah. That was real great for you, wasn't it?
Sinigi 	So now you're leaving me out? Who are you gonna bully next?
Wet Balloon 	Guys, guys! The soap is TEARING US APART!
Taxi 	You're both acting childish. Move on.
Poffer Lord 	She's right. Somebody has to take the moral high ground... so I say we put our differences aside, put our heads together and figure out a way to get into that castle.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Something's bound to hit us eventually, I guess.
Sinigi 	Brainz, watch ou-
A rushed bubble races through the square and shoves past Brainz, knocking him to the ground 	A rushed bubble races through the square and shoves past Brainz, knocking him to the ground
Sinigi 	Well. I said "watch out." You can't say I'm not looking out for you.
Suddle Bubb 	A-ah! I'm s-sorry! Sorry! (sniff) I'm so, s-so, suddly sorry, I just... (sniff) Ah...
Poffer Lord 	Oh, please, don't worry about it! Everything's okay.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(muffled) Excuse me? Who's face is in the ground again?
Suddle Bubb 	A-ah geez... I didn't mean to cause harm.. I just... (sniff) I'm having a r-rough day...
Poffer Lord 	Uh... do you want to talk about it?
Taxi 	(whispers) What's with you?
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) Look at her outfit. She's got to be from the royal court. Judging from the telling hat, a jester at that. Also, we're nice people.
Suddle Bubb 	O-oh, I wouldn't wanna get in your way, I'm just...
Poffer Lord 	You're a jester, right? From the court? The court close to the king? That court?
Suddle Bubb 	Th... t-h... ...wuh... W-WAAAAAAAAH!
She bursts into tears and runs away, ducking through a nearby alleyway. 	She bursts into tears and runs away, ducking through a nearby alleyway.
Taxi 	...real smooth, P-lord. You made her cry.
Poffer Lord 	D-did I say something wrong...?
Tam 	It's not like it's a stressful profession. You get paid to make fun of people. I do that for free every day.
Wet Balloon 	If we were being paid for being funny, I think I'd bring in the biggest paycheck. Just saying.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(gets up) None of you are being paid. But really, I think you just seriously upset that girl.
Poffer Lord 	By asking about her job...? I didn't mean... ugh... look, there's gotta be something wrong with her.
Tam 	You mean something wrong with you?
Poffer Lord 	No, I mean she seems troubled with something. Are you gonna have a shard up your shell the whole time, or are we going to work as a team?
Taxi 	He's right. She's one troubled bubble. If we can track her down and sort out whatever's worrying her, we can earn her friendship... and therefore our ticket into the royal court.
Poffer Lord 	Then it's settled! We're gonna be nice people! (turns to a bystander) ...excuse me, sir? You wouldn't have happened to see a bubble run along this way, have you? Big hat, super cute, red and blue?
Bubble Bob 	We all saw her! What are you, blind?
Taxi 	Actually...
Bubble Bob 	We've been standing here the entire time, purple guy! You just seriously upset her!
Poffer Lord 	Yes, I'm... aware... but we're gonna make things right, okay? Do you know anywhere where she might be?
Bubble Bob 	You seriously don't know Suddle Bubb, the beloved yet relatable jester? ...well, she's probably off drowning her sorrows at the Tapwater Inn, as she does every time she hits a minor inconvenience in her life.
Poffer Lord 	(turns aside) See? Issues.
Bubble Bob 	It's just down that conveniently accessible alleyway. But I'd like you to keep your hurtful remarks to yerself, bub. She's already been through enough today.
Sinigi 	Yeah, dude, have a little tact. Even I have a little tact.
Poffer Lord 	...is everybody against me on this? Everybody?
Prunemaster 	Of course not! You did nothing wrong! Just like the controverial Florican dictator Bana Banana.
Poffer Lord 	...okay, that feels... even worse... (to Taxi) Do I want to know who that is...?
Taxi 	(whispers) You really don't.
After another long discussion involving Poffer Lord's apparent lack of tact, the group make their way to the Tapwater Inn, pushing open the thick wooden doors. The place is unkempt and crowded, but Suddle Bubb can be seen sitting alone at the bar.	After another long discussion involving Poffer Lord's apparent lack of tact, the group make their way to the Tapwater Inn, pushing open the thick wooden doors. The place is unkempt and crowded, but Suddle Bubb can be seen sitting alone at the bar.
Poffer Lord 	Here we are. The most wretched hive of scum and limescale in the entire kingdom. I wouldn't expect a member of the royal court to be at a place like this. Are you sure that guy wasn't just messing with us?
Taxi 	Nope, she's over there. Poffer Lord, you're not allowed to say anything.
Poffer Lord 	...noted...
Suddle Bubb 	(sniff) ...Bartender...
Larry 	The usual, Suddle Bubb?
Suddle Bubb 	Extra grimy... (sniff)
Larry 	Must've been rough. Alright, one full tankard of dirty dishwater coming up...
MR Z BRAINZ 	L... Larry!?
Larry 	...huh? (sees Brainz) ...new hire? What? Never seen a guy with multiple jobs?
MR Z BRAINZ 	You're... you're at the bottom of the ocean?
Larry 	Yeah, commute's difficult. I need to clock back into ZEN in an hour, so unless you're gonna order anything, please don't talk to me...
MR Z BRAINZ 	(sits down) U-uh... water, please? Clean...?
Suddle Bubb 	(snickers for a moment) Lightweight...
Wet Balloon 	I'll also take the clean water, thanks.
Poffer Lord 	(sits down) ...hey, you're Suddle Bubb, right?
Suddle Bubb 	(drinking) ...Hm..?
Taxi 	I just said... ugh...
Poffer Lord 	(sigh) Look, about earlier-
OwOrange 	Bathwater. Swhaken, not swirred. Put a wittle uwmbwella in it.
Poffer Lord 	I-
Prunemaster 	Got any fruit juice?
The whole room freezes and turns around to look at Prunemaster. 	The whole room freezes and turns around to look at Prunemaster.
Larry 	We don't serve things that are... (leans in) ...sticky.
Prunemaster 	Silly me. How about blood?
Larry 	Also sticky.
Prunemaster 	(sigh) ...black coffee and toast, please.
Larry 	No crumbs.
Prunemaster 	(slams the bar) CAN I HAVE PECKING ANYTHING IN THIS JOINT!?
Taxi 	We're here to make peace, not to get drinks.
Poffer Lord 	Can I finish talking?
Suddle Bubb 	(sniff) Yeah...?
Poffer Lord 	Look, I'm sorry for, uh, upsetting-
Tam 	Flow Soda, please.
Larry 	We don't stock Flow Soda.
Poffer Lord 	CAN YOU LET ME FINISH!? (turns back to Suddle Bubb) ...uh, I'm sorry for upsetting you, and I really didn't mean any harm, but it seems like you're really troubled by something, and I just wanted to know if there was anything I... could do to help?
Suddle Bubb 	I'm... I... I'm... I'M DONE FOR! WAAAAAAAAAH!
Taxi 	See, you're really good at upsetting people!
Poffer Lord 	I didn't say anything wrong!
Suddle Bubb 	I'M RUINED! I-... (sniff) I'M G-G-GONNA LOSE MY JOOOOB! AND THEN I'LL L-LOSE MY A-APARTMENT! And... A-and... I'LL NEVER PAY OFF MY STUDENT LOANS! GAAAAAAAAAH!!!
Taxi 	Look, it'll be okay. Tell us what's wrong. Why are you losing your job?
Suddle Bubb 	Guh... (sniff) The king... he's gonna fire me... today, at the p-performance... b-because...
Sinigi 	Because? Spit it out.
Suddle Bubb 	B-b-because I'm not FUNNY anymore...! Me...! T-the cute, charismatic Suddle Bubb...! (sniff) I'm gonna lose... g-gonna lose all I have... (sniff) ...the king... he told me to start being funny again... he said my routine was stale... so... so I spent all night w-writing a new routine in my notebook, b-b-b-but...
Poffer Lord 	...ah, I see. You're not confident in your new routine. Uhh... you could try wearing a big cloak. That helps me feel better about myself. ...no, no, sorry, that's stupid. I'm stupid. But funny, right? I'm sure you can be funnier than that! Uh...
Taxi 	Remind me, why are you still talking again? (turns to Larry) ...actually, one bottle of mineral water, please.
Larry 	Coming right up.
Suddle Bubb 	N-no, you don't get it... I... (sniff) I LOST IT! T-T-THAT GREAT BIG BULLY SQUESHTER TOOK IT FROM ME!
Tam 	Oh, so there's a guy we need to punch now? Maybe I'll be the better negotiator this time.
Suddle Bubb 	...you see.. (sniff) S-Squeshter's always been jealous of my position as head jester... ...and sick of living in my shadow... ...comes from an esteemed school of cephalopod clownery... they've always been belittling me and seeking for an o-opportunity to steal my job, but... this morning, we ran into each other, and... Squeshter pushed me to the ground... said these horrible things... and took my notebook... (sniff) A-and the performance is in an hour, and I have no r-r-routine...
MR Z BRAINZ 	Cephalopod?
Wet Balloon 	It means squid and octopus.
MR Z BRAINZ 	I... I know that. But isn't this kingdom only for Suddlites?
Suddle Bubb 	T-there are some other sea creatures around, but they're really seen as s-second class citizens, because the king is... very, very xenophobic. (sniff) But my employment keeps food on the table, so...
Wet Balloon 	Oh, no, what? All the ocean's creatures are amazing!
Sinigi 	I don't get it. Surely you can just remember what you wrote? Maybe do a little bit of improvisation? We're sort of like, actors now. Maybe we could give you a lesson.
MR Z BRAINZ 	We were in ONE Flow Soda commercial... and a terrible commercial, at that...
Suddle Bubb 	W-well, us Suddlites are very... hehe... air-headed. We'd forget anything if we d-didn't write it down, you see... we don't have very great m-memory, like a... like a...
Wet Balloon 	Like a honeybee.
Suddle Bubb 	Something like that...
Tam 	Look, I'll tell you what, miss. We'll go bust up that impudent inksquirt of yours, take the notebook back, then you'll be able to do your performance, yeah?
Suddle Bubb 	(sniff) You'd really... do that for me...? Out of the kindness of your heart...?
Poffer Lord 	Out of the kindness of all of our hearts, actually, but yes. ...well, no. Admittedly we do kind of need something from you.
Suddle Bubb 	Y-you want money...? I'm sort of broke right now...
MR Z BRAINZ 	We all are. Uhh... we need you to smuggle us into the castle.
Suddle Bubb 	The castle...? I mean... (sniff) I can do that. But... why?
Poffer Lord 	Well, it all started-
Sinigi 	No time to waste, gang! You heard her! We only have an hour!
Poffer Lord 	But-
Sinigi 	Doesn't feel so good to have your story interrupted, does it? C'mon!
MR Z BRAINZ 	We don't even know where this Squeshter person went...?
Suddle Bubb 	Oh... Squeshter's probably in their tent... over on the murkier parts of town... uh... you'll be able to see it. It's super bright and garish. But... please, stay safe, okay? (sniff) I wouldn't want you to get hurt because of little old me...
Poffer Lord 	Just sit tight. We'll save your job. Brainz, WB, Taxi, let's go. Prunemaster, stop arguing with the bartender.
Prunemaster 	I DEMAND TO DRINK SOMETHING THAT ISN'T JUST WATER!
Larry 	Best I can do is sparkling...
Prunemaster 	NO!
Taxi 	(pulls Prunemaster away) Up and at em. You've had too little to drink.
The group gets up and begins to walk out, dragging the raging Prunemaster with them. 	The group gets up and begins to walk out, dragging the raging Prunemaster with them.
Larry 	...oh, and new hire?
MR Z BRAINZ 	(freezes and turns around) H-huh?
Larry 	...I'd watch your back if I were you.
MR Z BRAINZ 	...Purp's going to fire me, isn't he...
Larry 	Heh... I wish I could say that's the end of it. Just... watch your back, okay?
MR Z BRAINZ 	No... You're not... you're not going to tell him we were here, are you...?
Larry 	(slightly grins) Yeah, but... I'm not working for Purp right now, am I? I'm a bartender. From my perspective, you're just another faceless customer. I never saw you here.
MR Z BRAINZ 	...I... Mr Larry...
Larry 	Don't thank me. You need to remember that we're not friends. If I did happen to be on my shift at ZEN when we met... well, you get the idea. (yawn) My shift ends soon. You better scram before I clock back in.
MR Z BRAINZ 	...thanks anyway. (he hestitates for a moment, then turns around continues walking)
Wet Balloon 	Who was that?
MR Z BRAINZ 	A friend from work.
Poffer Lord 	I think he just said-
MR Z BRAINZ 	Well, it's more friends than you have, you cloaked sop. Step off.
Tam 	Ooh! He really put you in your place!
Poffer Lord 	Woah! You're unusually spiky today.
MR Z BRAINZ 	I... ah, geez... sorry... I've been hanging round Sinigi too much... the abrasiveness is starting to rub off on me...
Sinigi 	That's my Brainz! We really are partners, aren't we!?
MR Z BRAINZ 	No! No! I don't want to be the mean one!
Tam 	Nah, Vio, do that more. Some people need to be knocked down a peg more often.
Poffer Lord 	It's okay. Brainz isn't feeling himself today. We've all had a rough time. Let's focus our efforts onto helping Suddle Bubb for now. Remember - we're NICE people.
Wet Balloon 	I don't think we paid for any of those drinks.
Poffer Lord 	...uh, let's walk out quickly before anyone notices. Not nice enough to foot the bill.
Larry 	(shouting) You need to pay for these drinks, guys.
Poffer Lord 	Go, go, go, go, go!
The group quickly rush out of the tavern before Larry can complain more. 	The group quickly rush out of the tavern before Larry can complain more.
Suddle Bubb 	...nice people, huh?
Narrowly avoiding confrontation with the bartender, the group hastily exit the tavern and set their sights on procuring Suddle Bubb's stolen notebook.	Narrowly avoiding confrontation with the bartender, the group hastily exit the tavern and set their sights on procuring Suddle Bubb's stolen notebook.
MR Z BRAINZ 	So, uh... the murkier parts of town? Don't they keep this place pristine?
Taxi 	Hmm... you don't think she meant the Inkblot District? That's an infamously rough part of town. Heard all about it from the tourist brochure.
Sinigi 	Rough? We fought like fifty petty thieves on the way here! How can this city get any rougher!?
Poffer Lord 	Well, the main streets are cleaned daily. It seems the taxpayer budget was blown on roadsweepers and janitors.
MR Z BRAINZ 	That explains Larry.
Tam 	Oh yeah, they're sort of neat freaks over here, huh?
Taxi 	But in this frothy town, it's hard to clean in-between the cracks... ...uh... ...that was gonna be a cool one-liner... ...not sure how well that went down...
MR Z BRAINZ 	Do we need to sound cool...?
Taxi 	Of course! We're detectives now, on the hunt for a dashing supervillain. I can almost see it now... Taximie Tourmaline, private eyeless! All we need now... is a lead.
Wet Balloon 	(looks around) There! That alleyway with all the gunk strewn up the wall!
Sinigi 	(looks closer) Oh, that's real nice. All up the wall.
Prunemaster 	Hmm...
Prunemaster sticks their finger in the gunk and licks it. 	Prunemaster sticks their finger in the gunk and licks it.
Prunemaster 	Hmm... (savours it) ...familiar... (gets down on all fours and begins sniffing it) ...I'm getting an inkling... our inkster was here...
Poffer Lord 	Squeshter? Wait... are you picking up a scent? (looks at Brainz) They do that now?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Don't look at me! I've known them only about an hour longer!
Prunemaster 	Scent? No, silly! Look! (points to the wall) There's a piece of graffiti that reads "SQUESTER WAS HERE >:(" with a little obscene picture underneath it.
Poffer Lord 	(looks closer) Of course... the culprit flees the scene, tagging their location in a rush and spilling ink up the wall!
Prunemaster 	Ink?
Wet Balloon 	So we just follow the gunk?
Taxi 	Elementary, my dear Balloon. A thief always leaves a trail of breadcrumbs. If we follow the ink... we find the squink!
Taxi sprints off into the alleyway. 	Taxi sprints off into the alleyway.
Poffer Lord 	Waaaaait! What about the widely-agreed notion to not run into dark alleyways alone!? That's how you lose your kidneys!
OwOrange 	Rwelaaaaax. Nwobody's losing their kwidneys. Not while ywour under my pwotection.
Sinigi 	You're.
OwOrange 	THAT'S HOW YOU LOSE YOUR KIDNEYS!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Taxi, wait! (runs into the alleyway)
Poffer Lord 	(sigh) I guess we're doing this now. (follows) This is the part where we lose our kidneys.
12: The Part Where You Lose Your Kidneys 	12: The Part Where You Lose Your Kidneys
Area:Inkblot District 	This is that part. But seriously, what use do bubbles have for the human kidney? Actually, scratch that, do any of our cast even have kidneys? I would chalk this up to an unreasonable presumption from our main boy Poffer Lord rather than the reality of the situation. As of course, bubbles are attracted to money rather than kidneys. This is actually false advertising. Nobody loses their kidneys. Except you, the player.
Enemies:Squinkies, Pofferfish, Suddlite Thieves, Suddlite Vagabonds, Suddlite Hooligans	Playable Characters:MR Z BRAINZ, Wet Balloon, Poffer Lord, Taxi, Tam, Prunemaster + OwOrange
The group emerge from the alleyways, out of breath, and find themselves in a wider street of the Inkblot District. 	The group emerge from the alleyways, out of breath, and find themselves in a wider street of the Inkblot District.
Poffer Lord 	...(gasp)... ...did... ...did they take my kidneys...?
Taxi 	No. You have a stitch from running too fast. Now c'mon! This gunk isn't going to track itself!
Wet Balloon 	Actually, we've been here already. Around 5 minutes ago, I think.
MR Z BRAINZ 	You're telling me... we were going in circles...?
Orphan Squink 	Yeh. You was thinking we were gonna take your kidneys, mister. We were trying to give you directions.
Prunemaster 	WATCH OUT! HE WANTS YOUR KIDNEYS! (punches the child)
Orphan Squink 	(sags defeatedly on the ground) Please mister... I am 6 years old...
Prunemaster 	What's a kidney, anyway?
Sinigi 	Something that people like to take, apparently.
Poffer Lord 	Alright, alright! Forget about the kidneys! If we don't find Squeshter fast, we'll have no chance of talking to the king! ...and Suddle Bubb will get fired, and so on, and so forth...
Taxi 	Remember Suddle Bubb's testimony? Squeshter lives in a garish tent.
Tam 	(looks across the road) Like that one?
Poffer Lord 	Nah, not garish enough.
Tam 	How many garish multicoloured tents do you think there are in this uniformly dark street!?
Poffer Lord 	I don't know, two?
Orphan Squink 	Ah, over dere! The great travelling Squeshter is in town! I wanted to go get their autograf! But, eh, now I'm flat as a pancake.
Taxi 	Oh, you poor thing... is there anything we can do to help?
Orphan Squink 	Oh, it's okay, miss. If you could go and bring an autograf back for me I'd be happy in me final moments, before all me ink drains out.
Wet Balloon 	We'll do that!
Taxi 	Alright, gang. It's time to confront our suspect, and bring the one who harmed this innocent little child to justice!
Prunemaster 	That was me that did that, actually.
Orphan Squink 	Eh, uh, alterna-tive-lee, you could pour a bo'oh'o'wa'er on me, that'd inflate me right back up, but-
The group run off to approach the garish tent. 	The group run off to approach the garish tent.
Orphan Squink 	Ok, autograf, that's ok, I'm happy with dat.
... 	...
Poffer Lord 	A real big top, huh? What a card.
Tam 	And from the look of this cheap fabric, a real stingy one at that.
MR Z BRAINZ 	We haven't even met this person. Try not to be really mean to them.
Sinigi 	That's how you defend yourself in the cruel world. Everybody's an enemy.
MR Z BRAINZ 	...let's just get this over with. I've fought too many eccentric characters lately, and it's really taking an effect on my health... (he begins to walk towards the door)
Poffer Lord 	(pulls him back) No! You can't just walk through the door!
Taxi 	Rule number 1 of being detective! Don't walk through the door!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Alright, alright. How are we going to enter the tent? And don't say arson.
Prunemaster 	Aww...
MR Z BRAINZ 	Yeah, I predicted that one. I thought you'd, uh, lead with that.
Sinigi 	(looks around) See that long stick thingy with the light on it?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Lamppost.
Sinigi 	Yeah, that. We climb the lamppost, swing on that hanging cable, jump onto the roof of the tent, and crawl through that gap at the top. We use a coil of rope to lower ourselves from the ceiling above Squeshter's desk, where the notebook will be left carelessly lying around. Pick up the notebook, raise the rope, leave the tent without arousing suspicion.
Wet Balloon 	Wow...
Sinigi 	Yep, having no limbs gives you brainpower to think.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Or, hear me out... we use the DOOR.
Taxi 	Rope thing sounds more fun.
Prunemaster 	Can we put arson on the table again?
Poffer Lord 	...is it bad if I'm honestly curious to try Sinigi's plan?
Sinigi 	Alright, Sinigi's plan! Poffer Lord, tackle that lamppost and climb!
Poffer Lord 	...me!?
Sinigi 	Well, you have the longest arms.
Poffer Lord 	Surely you could just-
Taxi 	Climb it or you're a weak little girl.
Poffer Lord 	You can't make me do dangerous stunts by calling me-
Taxi 	Girl girl girl girl girl girl girl girl girl.
Poffer Lord 	(grabs the pole) Alright, we need to talk about this. You can't use "girl" as an insult. Firstly, it's completely untrue. Secondly, it's outdated, and it's reinforcing negative stereotypes-
Taxi 	I know. It's funny.
Poffer Lord 	IT'S NOT FUNNY! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S SUPPOSED TO GET OFFENDED BY SAYING STUFF LIKE THAT!
Taxi 	You have no idea how to climb that lamppost, do you?
Poffer Lord 	Maybe I would try harder if you could insult me a little more imaginably.
Prunemaster 	Call him a turnip.
Taxi 	Turnip turnip turnip turnip turnip turnip turnip turnip.
Poffer Lord 	NO! YOU CAN'T SAY STUFF LIKE THAT EITHER!
Wet Balloon 	What does that mean?
Taxi 	(whispers) Uh, no idea. Not sure why he's upset now.
Prunemaster 	(whispers) It's a slur against root vegetables.
Tam 	Okay, watching you try to prove your leadership skills is hilarious and all, but this has gone on long enough. (effortlessly floats to the top of the lamppost) See? Ghost. Flying. Easy.
Poffer Lord 	(sniff) ...why do you guys treat me like this...?
Prunemaster 	Maybe it's a you proble-
Poffer Lord 	CAN YOU CAN IT!? What is the DEAL with you today!?
Taxi 	Woah, chill. We're just trying to have a good time.
Poffer Lord 	A good time? All this wise-cracking and joking is doing NOTHING to help us! Can't you see that?
Prunemaster turns to OwOrange and does the finger-circling thing. They both giggle. 	Prunemaster turns to OwOrange and does the finger-circling thing. They both giggle.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Uh, maybe keep your voice down right outside the door...
Poffer Lord 	Not until we can sit down and have a civilised discussion about what it really takes to be heroes. Because all I've been seeing today is a troupe of-
Squeshter 	(poking head through the tent) Clooooooowns?
Poffer Lord 	(sniff) Yeah. Clowns, guys. Come on. (looks around, seeing everyone else in silence) ...what?
Squeshter 	Because it sounds like to me you buffoons are auditioning for the cirrrrrrrcus! Nyeheheheheh!
Taxi 	We've been, uh, caught.
Poffer Lord 	(turns around and sees Squeshter) Oh, yikes.
Wet Balloon 	Wait, we're no troublemakers! I promise there's a super reasonable explanation for why we're all up in your lamp post's business!
Squeshter 	Squish, squash, no time for a wash! In you go!
Squeshter extends their tentacles, wrapping around the others and pulling them into the circus tent. Sinigi looks upward and realises Tam is still at the top of the lightpost, unnoticed - he winks and places his finger to his mouth before turning invisible. Sinigi smirks in response. 	Squeshter extends their tentacles, wrapping around the others and pulling them into the circus tent. Sinigi looks upward and realises Tam is still at the top of the lightpost, unnoticed - he winks and places his finger to his mouth before turning invisible. Sinigi smirks in response.
Sinigi 	(under their breath, in a rather self-satisfied manner) Oh yeah. Sinigi's plan.
The rest enter Squeshter's tent, a very colourful big top full of circus training equipment, ranging from conventional to completely unexplainable. Various framed pictures of Squeshter are on the walls. In the middle of the tent, framed under the multicoloured lights, a wooden desk with a dark purple notebook. The group struggle to break free, but Squeshter keeps a hold tight on all of them. 	The rest enter Squeshter's tent, a very colourful big top full of circus training equipment, ranging from conventional to completely unexplainable. Various framed pictures of Squeshter are on the walls. In the middle of the tent, framed under the multicoloured lights, a wooden desk with a dark purple notebook. The group struggle to break free, but Squeshter keeps a hold tight on all of them.
Poffer Lord 	Look, we don't want any trouble- our intentions are just to-
Squeshter 	Please, please, please! Your intentions are clear! Step right through, and be bold. Such a worldwide adored squid always has time for the fans! I'm sure you must have lots of questions to ask me.
Prunemaster 	(steps on a spiked purple box) What's this?
Squeshter 	Uh, humorous device.
Prunemaster 	(points to a wardrobe-like chamber with spikes on it on the wall) What about this?
Squeshter 	My, my, the curiosity! Humorous device!
OwOrange 	(gestures towards a cartoonishly large gun hanged up on the wall) What abwout this one, fwunny guy?
Squeshter 	That's a gun.
Prunemaster 	Huh.
Squeshter 	But I have repurposed it as a humorous device. No further questions! Direct your attentions towards the main stage!
Squeshter throws them into the center of the tent before disappearing into the shadows. The lights turn off, plunging the surroundings into darkness with only this center ring illuminated. Looking around for any sign of Squeshter, the group slowly move into position in a circle, each drawing their weapons; Sinigi flies into Brainz's hands and assumes their weapon form, Poffer Lord brandishes his staff, Taxi pulls out her stop sign club, Prunemaster bears their claws and Wet Balloon looks a little angrier. After a few seconds of suspense, a spotlight turns on, revealing Squeshter sitting casually in a small folding chair titled "SQUESHTER" on the back.	Squeshter throws them into the center of the tent before disappearing into the shadows. The lights turn off, plunging the surroundings into darkness with only this center ring illuminated. Looking around for any sign of Squeshter, the group slowly move into position in a circle, each drawing their weapons; Sinigi flies into Brainz's hands and assumes their weapon form, Poffer Lord brandishes his staff, Taxi pulls out her stop sign club, Prunemaster bears their claws and Wet Balloon looks a little angrier. After a few seconds of suspense, a spotlight turns on, revealing Squeshter sitting casually in a small folding chair titled "SQUESHTER" on the back.
Squeshter 	The audition begins. Impress me.
Poffer Lord 	(he takes a deep breath, then points his staff directly at Squeshter) Alright, you acrobatic cuttlefish! If it's a fight you want, it's a fight you're gonna get!
Prunemaster 	You ready to scrap up an annoying CEPHALOPOD, zombie man?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Mmhmm...
Sinigi 	Hey, you good?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Yeah, yeah, just tired and all. We can take this guy.
Squeshter 	Fight me? No, no, no! This is your act! You have to perform by yourselves!
Poffer Lord 	Oh yeah? Well, I- (he thinks for a second, then lowers his staff) -act? What are you expecting us to do, exactly...?
Squeshter 	You wanted to join my act, no? Isn't it obvious?
Taxi 	You weren't gonna kill us, or anything? When you said "it sounds like you buffoons are auditioning for the circus"- that was literally what you meant.
Squeshter 	Uh, duh? Isn't that why you're here? Surely not for a squeeze and an autograph, squish?
Sinigi looks upwards, seeing Tam crawl through the top of the tent and begin to quietly descend down towards the table. Sinigi catches his glance and begins nodding rapidly in glee. 	Sinigi looks upwards, seeing Tam crawl through the top of the tent and begin to quietly descend down towards the table. Sinigi catches his glance and begins nodding rapidly in glee.
Wet Balloon 	Oh! You want us to perform with you?
Squeshter 	Yes, yes! Me, the amazing Squeshter, and my new entourage! Don't you think we have the squish to make it big? Why don't you show me what you've got?
Taxi 	Sure! How about a musical number?
Wet Balloon 	Yeah!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Since when did we have a...
Cue instrumental. Squeshter claps with glee and throws a wooden cane into the ring. Taxi catches it and begins to tap dance, somehow. 	Cue instrumental. Squeshter claps with glee and throws a wooden cane into the ring. Taxi catches it and begins to tap dance, somehow.
Taxi 	Alright, follow my lead. Double-time. 🎵 Roll the lemon- 🎵
Poffer Lord 	(puts out his arm to block Taxi) Stop. (turns to Squeshter) Sorry, can we have a few moments to prepare our act?
Squeshter deflates into their chair disappointedly. Poffer Lord notions to the group and they form a group huddle in the center of the tent. 	Squeshter deflates into their chair disappointedly. Poffer Lord notions to the group and they form a group huddle in the center of the tent.
Taxi 	(whispers) That was rude, you know. Not beating the lack of tact allegations, are we?
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) We haven't got time to play along with whatever it is Squeshter has going on. We need to get Suddle Bubb's book, and leave.
Sinigi flies up and sees Tam picking up the notebook silently behind Squeshter. The two share a knowing nod again. 	Sinigi flies up and sees Tam picking up the notebook silently behind Squeshter. The two share a knowing nod again.
Sinigi 	(whispers) Tam has it covered.
Taxi 	(whispers) You don't get it. Squeshter wants us to join the show. That'd take us on stage - where the king is going to be watching.
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) But we already made an agreement with Suddle Bubb-
Taxi 	(whispers) How do we know Suddle Bubb can help us? We have an easy and safe opportunity right here, and we might even get paid for it. You just want to help her because you think she's the morally right choice and she's cute.
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) She is.
Taxi 	(whispers) I guess I can't contest that.
Wet Balloon 	(whispers) But I think Squeshter's cute, too.
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) ---I mean the former thing. She's gonna lose her job. Squeshter's a thief and a consquid, and it's up to us as nice people to help those in need.
OwOrange 	(whispers) This is exwiting, I've nwever bween in a gwoup dwecision bewfore.
Taxi 	(whispers) Well, sometimes the best thing to do isn't always the right thing. It's easier if we just stick with Squeshter. Bubble people have short memory and all, she won't be upset for too long.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(whispers) So we're gonna team up with Squeshter?
Sinigi 	(whispers) Hang on.
Sinigi flies up and begins quickly shaking their head(?) and frowning at Tam, who has the notebook in his hands. He seems confused, but slowly puts the book down and begins to ascend back through the top of the tent. 	Sinigi flies up and begins quickly shaking their head(?) and frowning at Tam, who has the notebook in his hands. He seems confused, but slowly puts the book down and begins to ascend back through the top of the tent.
Sinigi 	(whispers) Okay, all sorted, we'll go the Squeshter route.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Are you absolutely sure Squeshter can't hear us?
Prunemaster quickly looks behind at Squeshter, who is distracted with an easel and a paintbrush putting together a new poster - "SQUESHTER AND THE SILLY SQUIDS - AN ALL NEW ENTOURAGE ACT" 	Prunemaster quickly looks behind at Squeshter, who is distracted with an easel and a paintbrush putting together a new poster - "SQUESHTER AND THE SILLY SQUIDS - AN ALL NEW ENTOURAGE ACT"
Prunemaster 	(whispers) Nah, we're good. I think someone's too excited about this whole audition thing.
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) Remember to whisper.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(whispers) Sorry.
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) We are NOT going the Squeshter route. We're going to confront this thief and bring justice to this dirty city.
Sinigi 	(whispers) Ugh, hold on a sec.
Sinigi flies up and desperately motions at Tam to go down and pick up the notebook again. He seems rather annoyed, but complies. 	Sinigi flies up and desperately motions at Tam to go down and pick up the notebook again. He seems rather annoyed, but complies.
Taxi 	(whispers) Alright, let's hold a vote. If you want to help Suddle Bubb, put your hand into the center.
Poffer Lord 	(he does this)
Taxi 	(whispers) Everyone else wants to help Squeshter, vote closed.
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) Not everyone voted.
Wet Balloon 	(whispers) I don't have any arms, but I would've been happy to put both of them forward.
Sinigi 	(whispers) Squeshter? Make up your minds...
Sinigi flies up again and shakes their head(?) even faster. Tam is now looking thoroughly annoyed with the notebook in his hands, and he drops it with a resounding thump. Squeshter hears and slowly turns around, but Tam quickly disappears before he is seen. 	Sinigi flies up again and shakes their head(?) even faster. Tam is now looking thoroughly annoyed with the notebook in his hands, and he drops it with a resounding thump. Squeshter hears and slowly turns around, but Tam quickly disappears before he is seen.
Poffer Lord 	(clears throat, attempting to sound jovial) Squeshter! We've been dying to know, as your biggest fans and all... simply how did you come up with a routine so magical?
Taxi 	What are you doing!?
Poffer Lord 	(whispers) We can worm out a confession one way or another. We're not going to help a thief.
Taxi 	(sigh) Suddle Bubb route it is, I guess...
Squeshter 	Ah, squish, squash! A magician never reveals their secrets! (crosses to the table and picks up the notebook, brushing it off) This new show just... came to me, if you may, in a flash of perspiration!
Poffer Lord 	But surely you had to have gotten your perspiration- uh, inspiration from somewhere, right?
Squeshter 	Oh, it's just an old family traditional routine, one that has been passed down from squid to squid for generations!
Poffer Lord 	One that you just created, hmm?
Squeshter 	Hmm? No, no, it's a trail mix of the old and new! Traditional and modern! Forgive my words! My first language is squishing and squashing! But I'm sure, in due time, I will share my work with my new apprentices!
Squeshter holds the notebook aloft in the light. 	Squeshter holds the notebook aloft in the light.
Squeshter 	For my genius and your assistance will prove to the king that us sea creatures are not to be underassumed! Us who were here before the bubbles! All of us who are uneven, messy and inky! If they think we are something to be laughed at, than by *, we will grant them the greatest laugh of their lives!
Poffer Lord 	Then why don't you come clean for once and tell us you STOLE your routine!
Squeshter 	Nyah!?
Poffer Lord 	Tam, now!
Tam reappears, rolling his eyes, and flies past Squeshter, grabbing the notebook out of their hands and rejoining the group. 	Tam reappears, rolling his eyes, and flies past Squeshter, grabbing the notebook out of their hands and rejoining the group.
Tam 	Took you long enough to make up your mind!
Sinigi 	HEY! Using Tam was my plan! You can't take away my plan from me!
Squeshter 	That spectre is your accomplice!? What is the meaning of this, squish!?
Poffer Lord 	You know what! It's Suddle Bubb's work that you stole from her!
Squeshter 	Incomprehensible! I never met such a bubble in my life!
Poffer Lord 	AHA! How'd you know she's a bubble?
Squeshter 	NYAH!? ---They have those sort of names, you know, Suddle Bubb, Bubble Sudd, Ruddle Plubb, it's all a little-
Poffer Lord 	A-HA! So now you're stereotyping!
Squeshter 	NYAH!?!? My, my, the LACK OF TACT! Storm into MY tent, steal MY book, call ME thief! And when I finally thought I found a group that could understand my genius!
Wet Balloon 	We've barely even talked...
Squeshter 	And you think I'll stand to have my career ruined, right when I finally have the chance to become more than a disgraced street performer? You have some real nerve, pickpockets! THIS IS MY BIG BREAK!
Squeshter leaps into the rafters and cues the spotlights, plunging the tent in delirious rainbow lights, before swinging down to pose in the middle of the tent, causing the group to jump backwards. 	Squeshter leaps into the rafters and cues the spotlights, plunging the tent in delirious rainbow lights, before swinging down to pose in the middle of the tent, causing the group to jump backwards.
Prunemaster 	(claps hands together) I'm gonna say it once more, with feeling - you ready to scrap up an annoying CEPHALOPOD, Zombie Man!?
OwOrange 	Wwhatever ywou dwo, DWO NWOT gwet gwabbed by thwose twentacles. Twust mwe, it nwever ewnds well.
MR Z BRAINZ 	I- you've said this exact thing before, I'm sure of it.
OwOrange 	Gwotta rweally hwammer in twhe jwoke fwor the awdience!
Squeshter 	That's the performing spirit! Maybe you can join my entourage after all! I have some spare cages in the back, from before they outlawed circus sea lions!
Poffer Lord 	We're not backing down! This is for Suddle Bubb - and the performance you stole from her!
Squeshter 	Squish, squash, squesh, what a load of swash! How about I rehearse for you thieves a little early? Better get away from the SPLASH ZONE! Nyahahahaha!
BOSS: The Muckiest Show	BOSS: The Muckiest Show
Area:The Ink Top 	Don't get dizzy under the lights - the main event is here to tangle!
Boss:Squeshter 	Playable Characters:MR Z BRAINZ, Wet Balloon, Poffer Lord, Taxi, Tam, Prunemaster + OwOrange
The final blow is dealt in slow-motion, as Squeshter is sent dramatically careening backward, followed by the spotlight. 	The final blow is dealt in slow-motion, as Squeshter is sent dramatically careening backward, followed by the spotlight.
Squeshter 	Squish, squash, I'm washed... exit... stage right...
Squeshter falls backward into the open spiked cupboard, which immediately slams shut on top of them. 	Squeshter falls backward into the open spiked cupboard, which immediately slams shut on top of them.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(winces) That's the Squeshter route closed, I guess...
Poffer Lord 	(breathing heavily) ...geez... talk about a robust performance... what is in that guy's diet, Shard-based protein shakes...?
Tam 	(throws the notebook into the air before catching it confidently and holding it out in front of him) And with one special notebook for our troubles! I'm pretty good at hanging onto things, eh?
Sinigi 	Taaaaam! Our plan WORKED! We're the BEST!
Sinigi rushes towards Tam and they spin around in circles, overjoyed. 	Sinigi rushes towards Tam and they spin around in circles, overjoyed.
Tam 	(he stops with an abrupt change to fustration) YOU'RE A TERRIBLE PLANNER! Can you just pick a route and STICK to it!?
Sinigi 	(backs away) Woah, woah, woah, don't get mad at me! (glances at Poffer Lord) That purple nitwit over there kept changing the plan!
Poffer Lord 	Me!? I'm the one who was trying to keep us all on track! Taxi was the one who suddenly decided to go off-course!
Taxi 	What, opting to take the easier route? I guess you're too young to understand how opportunities and shortcuts work, huh? Too stubborn to admit when you're wrong, like a little child?
Wet Balloon 	They're fighting again...
Prunemaster 	You can come and hide underneath the table with us if it'll make you feel better.
Wet Balloon 	That'd be nice...
Poffer Lord 	Well, excuse me for trying to be nice and help out a person in need! Isn't that what heroes are supposed to do? Help people?
Taxi 	YOU'RE NOT A HERO!
Poffer Lord 	...
Taxi 	There, I said it. You're not a hero. You're a confused teenager in a cloak thinking that you're somebody you're not. And you have a way of tricking people into believing your delusions, too. I'm a taxi driver! Why am I here? It's one distraction after another, isn't it?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Uh, guys...
Taxi 	What you've done is rounded up a bunch of vulnerable, confused people that have nowhere else to go and spun this narrative about "saving the world" and convinced us that we actually have some kind of chance - some kind of power, some kind of secret destiny. But what do you know about all of this? Why do you think the Elemental Cores are safer in your hands than they are in the government's? How do you know the world is going to end!?
Poffer Lord 	BECAUSE I'VE SEEN IT HAPPEN, ALRIGHT!?
Suddenly, the closet door bursts open, and Squeshter launches out back into the ring, fuming. 	Suddenly, the closet door bursts open, and Squeshter launches out back into the ring, fuming.
Squeshter 	Ohhhh, that DOES IT! YOU MADE A MESS OF THE WRONG CLOWN TODAY!
Wet Balloon 	(flies out from underneath the table) Squeshter!? You're not impaled?
Squeshter 	Juh? (looks back at the spiked cupboard) What, you thought that humorous device had real spikes in it? Don't you know anything about show business!?
Wet Balloon 	Woah, but it looks so real! How did you make it?
Squeshter 	Well... (suddenly calms down) Hehe, pretty funny you should ask, I actually put a lot of my efforts into that one. You see, the tricks are in the use of- WAIT A MINUTE! YOU'RE TRYING TO STALL ME WITH LONG-WINDED EXPLANATIONS, AREN'T YOU!? I WON'T HAVE EVEN A LITTLE PIECE OF IT!
Wet Balloon 	Wait! I was just curious! (looks at the others) I really just wanted to know...
Squeshter leaps over to the comically large gun and rips it off of the wall, turning round to aim it at the group. 	Squeshter leaps over to the comically large gun and rips it off of the wall, turning round to aim it at the group.
Squeshter 	RULE! THE GUN ALWAYS GETS FIRED! NOW RETURN SQUESHTER'S PROPERTY TO SQUESHTER, OR THE SET-UP WILL OBTAIN ITS PUNCHLINE! NYAHAHAHAHA!
MR Z BRAINZ 	I think we should probably give that notebook back, guys, they have a gun now.
Poffer Lord 	...
Tam 	Yo, P-Lord?
Squeshter 	I won't say this twice. You have to the count. One...
MR Z BRAINZ 	Wait, what's the count? You didn't tell us what the-
Squeshter 	TWO!
Squeshter abruptly fires the gun and is launched back comedically from the recoil, slamming into a shelf and being buried under a collection of humorous devices. Taxi pushes Poffer Lord out of the way and ducks. MR Z BRAINZ trips backwards. Tam and Sinigi float away. Prunemaster and OwOrange are still underneath the table. The blast misses all of them and ends up hitting Wet Balloon straight-on, splattering ink all over the place and knocking them to the floor.	Squeshter abruptly fires the gun and is launched back comedically from the recoil, slamming into a shelf and being buried under a collection of humorous devices. Taxi pushes Poffer Lord out of the way and ducks. MR Z BRAINZ trips backwards. Tam and Sinigi float away. Prunemaster and OwOrange are still underneath the table. The blast misses all of them and ends up hitting Wet Balloon straight-on, splattering ink all over the place and knocking them to the floor.
MR Z BRAINZ 	No-! (he kneels down and picks up Wet Balloon, dazed and covered in ink.) Please... no...
Wet Balloon 	Eugh...
Poffer Lord 	I... I'm sorry... this is all my fault... I...
MR Z BRAINZ 	W-Wet Balloon... We couldn't save you...
OwOrange 	F-f-fwirst we lwost Big Pear, and now-
Wet Balloon 	What's the big deal, it's just ink...
MR Z BRAINZ 	Huh? You're alive?
Wet Balloon 	Uh, yeah, it's just ink. It didn't hurt.
MR Z BRAINZ 	(looks at the collapsed Squeshter) It's just ink?
Wet Balloon 	Well, it's making my eyes sting a bit, but otherwise-
Squeshter 	(comes to their senses) Nya? What do you mean, "it's just ink"!? You thought it was a real-- WHAT KIND OF PERFORMER DO YOU TAKE ME FOR!?
Taxi 	Not a particularly convincing one. (gestures to the others to leave) C'mon, let's go. If we're quick we can get this back to Suddle Bubb and be before the king before we know it. All's well that ends well, yeah? (looks at the fruits) You two, get up from underneath the table, it's time to go.
Poffer Lord 	...
Prunemaster 	The, uh, the outside world is scary-
Taxi 	(grabs Prunemaster's hand) Not as scary as this guy's tent, let's get a move on.
Tam 	Cephalo-bye! (laughs and flies out through the entrance of the tent)
Squeshter 	WAAAAIT! MY NOTEBOOK! YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE MY NOTEBOOK! GET BACK HERE!
Sinigi 	Cephalo-bye- what does that even mean? That doesn't even-
Poffer Lord 	...let's go.
The group turn tail and leave back through the entrance to the tent as Squeshter desperately reaches out from underneath the pile of humorous devices. MR Z BRAINZ stops and turns around to look at them. 	The group turn tail and leave back through the entrance to the tent as Squeshter desperately reaches out from underneath the pile of humorous devices. MR Z BRAINZ stops and turns around to look at them.
MR Z BRAINZ 	Don't steal! (he leaves)
Squeshter 	Steal!? Why do these people keep telling me I- (a humorous device falls from the shelf and conks them on the head) Nyah...
The curtains of the tent close on the comically buried and dazed Squeshter. 	The curtains of the tent close on the comically buried and dazed Squeshter.
The group rush back through the Inkblot District and make their way back to the Tapwater Inn. Holding the purple notebook, Poffer Lord takes a deep breath and reaches for the door, but the group is distracted by the sound of a voice from the nearby alley. 	The group rush back through the Inkblot District and make their way back to the Tapwater Inn. Holding the purple notebook, Poffer Lord takes a deep breath and reaches for the door, but the group is distracted by the sound of a voice from the nearby alley.
??? 	Heyyy! Over here!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Huh?
They walk into the alley and see Suddle Bubb waiting, nervous and fidgeting. 	They walk into the alley and see Suddle Bubb waiting, nervous and fidgeting.
Suddle Bubb 	Y-you got it, right?
Poffer Lord 	Suddle Bubb! (he clears his throat) ..uh, we're sorry for the wait, but here. (He presents the notebook to her. She takes it and smiles.)
Suddle Bubb 	No way! You guys are just the absolute bubbly BEST! Aha!
She turns away and flips through the notebook ecstatically. 	She turns away and flips through the notebook ecstatically.
Suddle Bubb 	W-wow, it's all here...! Every last trick, joke and routine! I really, really can't thank you guys enough...!
She turns around and hugs Poffer Lord, catching him off guard. 	She turns around and hugs Poffer Lord, catching him off guard.
Suddle Bubb 	You've really gone and helped me out here, ya know? I would've been soapy toast if it wasn't for you generous fellas and your complete willingness to do whatever I tell ya!
Taxi 	(somewhat annoyed) Yes, well, it was a group effort. But we're just glad we were able to help you get your performance back.
Suddle Bubb 	(she floats away and looks down at the notebook again) Mm-hmm! Honestly, it's a little avant-garde, but I'm sure I can make it work, yeah? Anyway! If you guys just follow me-
Tam 	...what do ya mean, "avant-garde"? You wrote it...
Suddle Bubb 	(she seems surprised for a second) ...Hm? Oh, yeah. That's what I said, right? Ehehe... well...
Poffer Lord 	You-
Suddle Bubb 	W-wait--
He suddenly rushes forward, snatching the notebook out of her hands. He flips to the front page. In big writing is "PROPERTY OF SQUESHTER". He flips through every page. Instructions, drawings, and trick after trick specifically tailored to Squeshter's design. 	He suddenly rushes forward, snatching the notebook out of her hands. He flips to the front page. In big writing is "PROPERTY OF SQUESHTER". He flips through every page. Instructions, drawings, and trick after trick specifically tailored to Squeshter's design.
Poffer Lord 	...this isn't yours, is it. And it wasn't yours to begin with either, huh?
Taxi 	This is Squeshter's notebook!?
Suddle Bubb seems shocked for a moment. She smiles somewhat guiltily and puts her hands on her head. 	Suddle Bubb seems shocked for a moment. She smiles somewhat guiltily and puts her hands on her head.
Suddle Bubb 	Bleh. Okie... so... maybe I wasn't completely honest about my story...
Poffer Lord 	(he hestitantly brandishes his staff) You'd better explain yourself. Now.
Suddle Bubb 	Hey-hey now, cool it, cool it...
Wet Balloon 	You... lied to us...?
Suddle Bubb 	So... maybe I exaggerated a teensy little bit. But, come on, most of what I said was true! I really have lost my shine, and I really WAS gonna lose my job - and you guys really did help me a super lot with that - and my student loans are still a huge financial issue for me...! So... when I heard the travelling performer Squeshter was in town, I... well, hehe, figured I could take some inspiration?
Poffer Lord 	Perspira- INSPIRTATION!? Isn't Squeshter your rival!?
Suddle Bubb 	We've never met, aha! Of course, when I saw you guys all lost and confused in the square- you know how impressionable tourists are- always willing to do whatever you say as long as you put on a cute face and crank up the waterworks! But that's what comes with being a performer!
Prunemaster 	(too busy playing in a puddle of soap in the floor to listen to any of this)
OwOrange 	(turns around to face the camera with a mouthful of soap bubbles)
Poffer Lord 	Y-you... you made up a fake story to trick us into stealing somebody else's work!?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Is it weird that I don't really feel surprised...
Poffer Lord 	...I thought we were helping you... you made us... trust you... and this whole thing was a lie...?
Suddle Bubb 	Aw, lighten up, you didn't like, commit a crime or anything. Squeshter's just some dirty old squid. Nobody will care what happens to them here!
Tam 	You're telling me that Squeshter didn't even do a thing wrong!? We went and beat em up for NO REASON!?
Suddle Bubb 	Well, Squeshter's all creepy and... okay, yeah, that's exactly true. But no hard feelings, right? We're all buds here! Now c'mon, we need to get to the castle in time for my big reinvention!
Tam 	Why would we go with you!?
Suddle Bubb 	Don't you want to see the king? I'm a bubble of my word, you know! You think I was just gonna leave you high and dry? What kinda performer do you take me for?
Taxi 	A derivative one. (sigh) This isn't the first time you've done something like this, is it? How much of your career is even yours?
Suddle Bubb 	(she shrugs) Bleh. Gotta do what you can to survive. This outfit, these colours, you think I just made it all up overnight? It's a bubble-pop-bubble world out there, bub- you gotta look out for yourself and climb that slipperly ladder like your life depends on it! But that's soap for ya! Cute, squeaky-clean, and tastes bad in your mouth!
She giggles, then poses in a cutesy manner, thoroughly annoying everyone in the room. 	She giggles, then poses in a cutesy manner, thoroughly annoying everyone in the room.
Wet Balloon 	I thought you were nice...
Suddle Bubb 	(pats Wet Balloon on the head patronisingly) I am nice, sweetie, but work is stressful and telling the truth doesn't put food on the table.
Taxi 	Can you just can it with the cutesy schtick!?
Suddle Bubb 	Eh, got me this far. But really, though, no hard feelings. Sometimes you just gotta lie to get what you want, plain as that! Ehehe... so... can you pass that notebook back or not? Time is ticking, and you've got a King to see, eh?
Poffer Lord 	...No! The deal's off! We're not going with a thief! This notebook is going back to its rightful owner!
Taxi 	What the stars do you mean, "No"!? It's not like we can smooth things over with Squeshter! Even if it's wrong, going with Suddle Bubb is the only way we can get-
Poffer Lord 	We'll find another way, then. I don't care what you think. I want to be a hero. And heroes do the right thing. It's up to us to do what's right-
Tam 	What's right, huh? Breaking into an innocent squid's home and stealing their belongings because a cute girl told you to?
Poffer Lord 	YOU ALL WENT ALONG WITH IT! DON'T TRY AND PIN THE BLAME ON ME! (turns to Suddle Bubb) This is YOUR fault! Making me look like an IDIOT in front of my teammates!
Suddle Bubb 	...Huh? When did this suddenly become about you!?
Poffer Lord 	Don't play dumb with me! Everything you've done here to make me doubt myself! All this time I was thinking there was something wrong with me - but it's just been you all along! Bursting into tears to make me feel like I couldn't do a SINGLE thing right...!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Hey, maybe we need to step back for a second and-
Poffer Lord rips the notebook apart in a fit of rage, scattering its pages to the wind, before throwing what's left of it into the soapy puddle on the ground and stomping it into a soggy mess. Suddle Bubb goes pale. The rest of the group look away, uncomfortable.	Poffer Lord rips the notebook apart in a fit of rage, scattering its pages to the wind, before throwing what's left of it into the soapy puddle on the ground and stomping it into a soggy mess. Suddle Bubb goes pale. The rest of the group look away, uncomfortable.
Prunemaster 	(gets splashed with water) Hey!
Poffer Lord 	THERE! THERE'S YOUR NOTEBOOK! GONE WITH THE WIND, LIKE WHAT'S ABOUT TO HAPPEN TO YOUR CAREER!
Suddle Bubb 	... ... ...
Suddle Bubb simply floats there, silent, with her hands over her face. Poffer Lord stands triumphantly, but falters after a second, as if having a moment of realisation. 	Suddle Bubb simply floats there, silent, with her hands over her face. Poffer Lord stands triumphantly, but falters after a second, as if having a moment of realisation.
Poffer Lord 	...W-wait, no, I didn't mean to-
??? 	THERE THEY ARE!
The sound alerts the group, who all turn to see Squeshter storming through, holding an ice-pack to their head with one tentacle, flanked by two bubble guards. 	The sound alerts the group, who all turn to see Squeshter storming through, holding an ice-pack to their head with one tentacle, flanked by two bubble guards.
Squeshter 	THAT'S THEM, OFFICERS! THOSE ARE THE DRY FELLOWS WHO ATTACKED ME AND STOLE MY THINGS! (points dramatically) ARRRRRRRREST THEM!
Taxi 	Hey, officers! (to the others) Don't worry, I have experience. (back to the guards) There's a perfectly valid explanation for all of-
Poffer Lord 	It was HER! (points behind him) She tricked us into everything from the start, and whatever you do, don't listen to a WORD she says!
Taxi 	Uh...
Pubble Police 	...who...?
Poffer Lord turns around. The alley is empty. 	Poffer Lord turns around. The alley is empty.
Poffer Lord 	S-Suddle Bubb! You know, the jester! She was just here, and she-
Opple Cop 	Jester? Five minutes before the King's entertainment starts? Come up with a better story, bub.
Pubble Police 	Bit of a random choice, innit? A jester?
Poffer Lord 	No! Listen to me! She was RIGHT HERE! She was talking to us! She manipulated us into taking Squeshter's-
Opple Cop 	(points his spear towards them) Yeah, yeah, save it for the judge. Or a psychiatrist. Freaking tourists...
Pubble Police does the finger-twirling thing. They both giggle. 	Pubble Police does the finger-twirling thing. They both giggle.
Poffer Lord 	LISTEN TO ME! WE WERE FRAMED!
Taxi 	(sigh) Look, don't worry about it. (starts taking out her weapon) Let's just cut our losses, knock these guys out and storm the castle by any means necessary.
Opple Cop 	(speaks into bubble radio) We have a verbal admission of intention of violence over here.
Pubble Police 	We can do this the easy way or the hard way, yeah?
Taxi 	Yeah! Big whoop! We hurt people! Is that what you want to hear!?
Wet Balloon, still covered in ink and timidly hiding in the back, floats to the front. The cops suddenly falter and seem disgusted. 	Wet Balloon, still covered in ink and timidly hiding in the back, floats to the front. The cops suddenly falter and seem disgusted.
Wet Balloon 	Wait! I'm Balloonian! You know how the Good Wood will hear about this if you arrest a-
Pubble Police 	Oh, ew, ew, ew, ew! Stay away from me!
Opple Cop 	Oh, stars - I feel sick...
Pubble Police 	(frantically chattering into radio) Calling for backup, I repeat, calling for backup, there is an absolutely FILTHY suspect in the vicinity-
Wet Balloon 	...Filthy...?
Opple Cop 	You understand how severe of a crime it is to be floating around like that!? Dripping with that disgusting, contaminating muck?
Wet Balloon 	Oh, you mean the ink from when Squeshter shot me? Well, it's not exactly easy to clean, so-
Pubble Police 	(turns to Squeshter) You're responsible for this?
Squeshter 	(jumps) Eugh-wha!? Well, you see-
Opple Cop 	(writing in a notepad) Spreading grime and ink, filthying our city... should've known not to trust a squid's report...
Pubble Police 	You're under arrest too. All of you, proceed this way or else face further prosecution under the law of the Sud Kingdom.
Sinigi 	(looking down the alley) Y'know, if we make a break for it, we can probably just run. It's only two guys.
Suddenly, a huge group of guards rush to either end of the alley and close in with spears. 	Suddenly, a huge group of guards rush to either end of the alley and close in with spears.
Opple Cop 	Ah, good, there's the backup we requested.
Sinigi 	Heh. Guess we gotta pop some bubbles after all.
Prunemaster 	You ready to scrap with the POLICE, zombie-man?
MR Z BRAINZ 	Not really, but sure, I guess. (Sinigi flies into his hands)
All but Poffer Lord brace themselves for battle. 	All but Poffer Lord brace themselves for battle.
Poffer Lord 	Wait, wait, wait, STOP!
He throws his hands up. 	He throws his hands up.
Poffer Lord 	I surrender. Arrest us.
Taxi 	...what?
Poffer Lord 	(sigh) Haven't we caused enough damage? You... were right. I'm not a hero. None of us are. If we just cooperate, they'll send us back to the surface, and then I can let you guys go, and we can just all forget this ever happened, alright...?
Taxi 	...Poffer Lord... I didn't mean...
Pubble Police 	Oh, easy way? Huh. That's new. They don't usually go for the easy way. We say it as a formality and all, but we don't actually expect you to-
Taxi 	...look, if we can explain to the judge what happened, I'm sure-
Opple Cop 	No, sorry. There's no judge - that bit was also a formality. Usually we just take them to jail.
Prunemaster covertly takes out the pipe bomb from earlier and prepares to throw it, but Tam notices and disapprovingly gestures to stop. Prunemaster grumbles and slowly puts it back. 	Prunemaster covertly takes out the pipe bomb from earlier and prepares to throw it, but Tam notices and disapprovingly gestures to stop. Prunemaster grumbles and slowly puts it back.
Tam 	He always makes plans and stuff. Let's just see where this goes.
Pubble Police 	(claps his hands together) So! Let's get those handcuffs and such sorted, yeah?
Cut to everyone, plus Squeshter, being escorted by the guards in handcuffs through the road, booed by bubble spectators. 	Cut to everyone, plus Squeshter, being escorted by the guards in handcuffs through the road, booed by bubble spectators.
Tam 	Hmph. Didn't expect it to go like this.
Squeshter 	ATTENTION, BUBBLES! I'M NOT ASSOCIATED WITH THEM! DON'T LUMP ME IN WITH YOUR BOOING!
MR Z BRAINZ's handcuffs slip off. He crouches down to pick them up, slips them back on, and realises they're entirely made out of soap. 	MR Z BRAINZ's handcuffs slip off. He crouches down to pick them up, slips them back on, and realises they're entirely made out of soap.
MR Z BRAINZ 	...oh. That can't be efficient. (turns to the others) You know, you can just-
He looks to Poffer Lord, who is entirely silent and keeping his back to the others. 	He looks to Poffer Lord, who is entirely silent and keeping his back to the others.
MR Z BRAINZ 	...forget about it...
Pubble Police 	Keep moving, guys. Sooner this is over, sooner we can kick back with the plastic-wrapped ice creams.
Wet Balloon 	I could kinda go for one of those...
Opple Cop 	No, no, not for you, for us. (points at Wet Balloon with his spear) Take the filthy one to the bathhouse to be sentenced with the deluxe bubble bath punishment. The rest of you lot, into the dungeons.
MR Z BRAINZ 	You can't! Wet Balloon didn't do anything-
Wet Balloon 	Woah, woah, woah, might wanna run that one by me again. Bubble bath!?
Opple Cop 	That's right. The biggest bath in the place, reserved specifically for the filthiest. Scum like you deserve nothing more than to be scrubbed, washed, and submerged in soapy bubbly water for hours on end.
Wet Balloon 	(with sparkling eyes) No way... and that's my punishment!?
Opple Cop 	I- I- I can't do this anymore... giving sentences this severe is- how am I supposed to look my family in the eye when-
Pubble Police 	(pats Opple Cop on the back) It's protocol. It's what the law dictates.
Wet Balloon 	Well, I'm certainly guilty! I ought to break the law more often!
Opple Cop 	(choking back tears) So young and innocent...
The guards lead the ecstatic Wet Balloon away. 	The guards lead the ecstatic Wet Balloon away.
Tam 	At least one of us is having fun.
The remaining members of the group are poked and prodded all the way into the castle dungeons. Before long, they are all in a comfortably spacious yet barren holding cell. Across the hallway, in a separate cell, is Squeshter, still pouting.	The remaining members of the group are poked and prodded all the way into the castle dungeons. Before long, they are all in a comfortably spacious yet barren holding cell. Across the hallway, in a separate cell, is Squeshter, still pouting.
Gubble Guard 	(slams the barred door shut) N-n-now you all s-s-stay in there and think about w-w-w-what you've DONE!
Dubble Doorman 	Shh, Keith, shh. It's over now. The mean people have been jailed. Let's get you a hard drink, yeah?
Gubble Guard 	Y-yeah... yeah... that'd be nice...
Dubble Doorman 	We'll meet up with the boys, talk this out, have some ice creams afterward. Just try and clear your head of all this nonsense.
He leads the sniffling guard away and back up the staircase at the end of the hallway, leaving the group alone. Poffer Lord sits quietly in the corner. Everyone else stands around awkwardly considering what to say. 	He leads the sniffling guard away and back up the staircase at the end of the hallway, leaving the group alone. Poffer Lord sits quietly in the corner. Everyone else stands around awkwardly considering what to say.
Taxi 	(after a minute of silence) Well, on the bright side... we finally got into the castle.
Sinigi 	Haha, Magnetoid, very fun- wait, WAIT! We ARE in the castle! We succeeded at step one of the plan!
Taxi 	That's... kind of what I just said-
Sinigi 	(shouting at the corner) Yo, Poffer Lord! You really are smarter than I thought! This whole getting arrested on purpose thing!
Taxi 	Okay, maybe let's try to avoid poking the-
MR Z BRAINZ 	Hey, we've been in worse scrapes. I'm sure we can still make it to the king somehow.
Prunemaster 	What are a couple of bars to hold us!? Let's BLOW THEM TO SMITHEREENS!
Tam 	You hear that, P-Lord? The plan is back on the road!
Poffer Lord 	...plan? There's no plan. It's over. I understand now. All this time, I thought I was doing the right thing, but all I did was make things worse...
Squeshter 	YOU PEOPLE ARE NUTS! YOU JUST RUINED MY ONE CHANCE AT A REAL CAREER!
Sinigi 	(shouting through the bars) Yeah, well, we had it WORSE today! With that attitude, you deserve it!
Poffer Lord 	...and to think I tried to boss you guys around like a "leader"... ...I'm so pathetic...
Taxi 	Ah, geez... look, maybe I was a little too harsh earlier-
Poffer Lord 	...no, no, you're right. (sigh) I've been pretending. I managed to convince myself that I was... well, that I could've... done something... to stop it. But it's been hopeless from the start. The Order of the Sapphire will be here soon. And I don't know how it's going to happen, but there's nothing I can do to stop...
Taxi 	...the end of the world? You... mentioned that earlier. Maybe it'd help to talk about it? What's going to happen?
Poffer Lord 	(he slowly gets up) ...I don't know. I suppose I've been hiding too much for too long. But... here's the truth. You know I'm not native to Starcenta, right...?
MR Z BRAINZ 	I gathered that. You visited a lot of places, right?
Poffer Lord 	...when I was a little kid, I lived somewhere far away. I don't remember much. Just... the sun. I remember sitting underneath a tree in a field with the sun shining brighter than I've ever seen it since. The next thing I remember, the sky... cracks open. All I remember are the colours. Warped patterns, blinding violet hues, nothing I had ever seen before. People around me were running and screaming. I was left there alone. The only words I caught were... "The Starblight is here". Then a Poffer tackles me, and the next thing I know, I'm looking up at an entirely different sky. It saved my life by warping me away. I don't know what happened to my home, but... I never saw it again. Whatever happened, I knew I had to stop it from ever happening again. I couldn't let that happen to anybody.
MR Z BRAINZ 	...the Starblight... it sounds familiar to me. Prunemaster, was that in the murals?
Prunemaster 	Dunno. We haven't read all of them, because Mr Grapefruit likes to paint the walls with his juices and cover up the inscriptions.
OwOrange 	He cwalls himswelf a "pwofessional awtist".
Poffer Lord 	I thought that was the end of the world. Then a Poffer tackles me, and the next thing I know, I'm looking up at an entirely different sky. It saved my life by warping me away. I don't know what happened to my home, but... I never saw it again. Whatever happened, I knew I had to stop it from ever happening again. I couldn't let that happen to anybody.
Poffer Lord 	With no place to call home, I wandered between worlds growing up, desperately trying to find an explanation for what had happened to my world. I went to a thousand places, took on many names, met a lot of special people... but all roads led here. I didn't know who I was, or how to feel, until I became Poffer Lord. It finally felt like I had a purpose. Even if I couldn't belong to a place, being with the Poffers felt like a new kind of home to me... and I felt like I was finally happy with who I was for the first time. The Poffer Lord. Traveling between worlds not out of necessity, but curiosity... but all throughout my travels, I knew I couldn't rest until I prevented that thing, the Starblight, from rising again. When I arrived on Starcenta, and saw that comet, I just knew... it had to be connected to what I had seen all those years ago, in some cosmic way. But I don't know how. I don't know if it's going to be the Order of the Sapphire, or Worm, or anybody else... I just thought that keeping the Elemental Cores out of anybody's hands was the only place to start, because once that comet's heart starts beating again---
He pauses. 	He pauses.
Poffer Lord 	---That's when it's all going to end. The only thing I knew for sure is that if they all ended up in one place again... it would happen.
Taxi 	...then let's find out the truth. (extends out her hand) That heart. The cores. We'll find out what it all means.
Poffer Lord 	...?
Taxi 	Of course Good Wood was right! We DON'T understand what we're getting into! So... we need to find out for ourselves! Of course you don't have a plan, you complete nitwit! We don't know all the facts here!
Poffer Lord 	Well...
MR Z BRAINZ 	Y-yeah! Everything we've seen so far... there has to be an explanation. If we can find out what's putting Starcenta in danger, we can stop it.
Tam 	Y'know, maybe those Sapphire guys are right-
Poffer Lord 	NO!
Tam 	Well, okay, geez, just trying to carry on the conversation.
Poffer Lord 	...no, no, I'm sorry. It's just... (sigh) Alright. Truth number two. You know how I tried to recruit a team from Balloonia before meeting you guys...? They weren't exactly my first choice.
Taxi 	...are you serious?
Poffer Lord 	Yeah- I used to be in the Order of the Sapphire. For a while. At first, I really did think that the * was responsible for the Starblight. So I joined their ranks. Made some... friends. I was young and foolish.
MR Z BRAINZ 	How long ago...?
Poffer Lord 	Last week. Here's the thing; they can't just "destroy" Shards. When you break them, the dust reforms as Apparitions, and when you defeat those, they coalesce back into a Shard. It seems that the only way to properly remove it from the cycle is to absorb it into your own body, but even then... I don't know how many Shards you could absorb before it starts to take a toll on your health. When the Sapphire get their hands on every Elemental Core, they want to use the reactor - the heart - to construct an explosive charge so powerful it would eradicate the entire Crash Site, cutting off the supply at the source. But to do that all in one go - no matter how they feel about it, the ecosystem of Starcenta... relies on the * and its residual energy. To completely destroy that in one hasty move could turn the entirety of Starcenta into an ecological dead zone.
Taxi 	So we know why they want them. That's one question answered already.
Poffer Lord 	I told them that it wasn't safe, but they wouldn't listen. So... I did the only thing I could. I grabbed the single Core we had already found and tried to make a break for it. I barely escaped alive... but I had to drop the Core. (sigh) I should've been upfront about all this sooner...
Tam 	Hey, it means we're even, right? They have one, we have one. The score is 1-1.
Poffer Lord 	...I'm sorry, guys. I'm sorry for hiding things from you. I'm sorry for snapping, and being bossy, and losing my temper... and I'm sorry I didn't listen to you all. If I hadn't have forced us to help Suddle Bubb, we wouldn't be here right now.
Taxi 	Y'know what? Don't sweat it. The girl had me fooled too! I just wanted to go with whatever was easiest, even if it didn't seem morally okay at the time... ...and that's not good either. I think we both learned something from this.
Sinigi 	Yeah, TRUST NOBODY!
Taxi 	Nah. You have to trust people sometimes, or else we'd all become isolated, paranoid wrecks. Life... is messy. Sometimes there's not always a clear-cut "right thing". Just... follow your heart. Even good people make mistakes sometimes. As long as your heart's in the right place, just carry on trying to do the best you can. ...ugh, saying this makes me sound old...
MR Z BRAINZ 	Uh, I'm sorry for calling you a cloaked sop earlier, that sorta just slipped out.
Poffer Lord 	I'd kind of forgotten about that, but okay, thanks for the apology. Anyway! No more moping! There's still time to set things right!
Prunemaster 	Now THAT'S the purple guy I remember!
MR Z BRAINZ 	It's just a shame Wet Balloon isn't around to hear us make amends. You know it upsets them when we fight and all.
Sinigi 	Put "rescue the Balloon again" on our to-do list.
Tam 	Heh, rescue? Did you hear what that "punishment" was? Ol' bathbomb's safe and sound.
BOOM 	BOOM
Tam 	Oop.
OwOrange 	Is thwat...
Poffer Lord 	...the Order of the Sapphire. They're here.
BOOM 	BOOM
Taxi 	How'd they break through the barrier...?
Poffer Lord 	They must've found a way. Alright, gang. It's up to us to put right what we put wrong! Or something!
Taxi 	Put right what once went wrong.
Poffer Lord 	Thank you! Everyone ready?
Prunemaster 	YEAH!
MR Z BRAINZ 	Uh, no, maybe we need a bit of prep time-
BOOM 	BOOM
MR Z BRAINZ 	-nevermind, uh, yeah.
Poffer Lord 	That's the spirit! (leaps up, rushes towards the bars) -right, we're still in prison. Gonna need to sort that out first.
Tam 	Relax...
Tam effortlessly phases through the bars and flips a switch, opening the cell door. Everyone cheers. 	Tam effortlessly phases through the bars and flips a switch, opening the cell door. Everyone cheers.
Tam 	These bars aren't exactly ghostproof!
Poffer Lord 	...and you could do that the entire time, huh?
Tam 	I wanted you to say sorry first. Sorry too, by the way.
BOOM 	BOOM
Taxi 	Alright, alright, we're out of time for sentimentality! Let's go bust up some bots!
Everyone runs towards the stairwell. Poffer Lord stops midway, hesitates, then quickly runs over to Squeshter's cell and unlocks the door. 	Everyone runs towards the stairwell. Poffer Lord stops midway, hesitates, then quickly runs over to Squeshter's cell and unlocks the door.
Squeshter 	...
Poffer Lord 	Hey, uh... I'm really sorry about what happened. I think this has been all one huge misunderstanding for everyone.
Squeshter 	...
Poffer Lord 	Uh, you really do have a talent. And... we really could use some more... uniqueness in the crew. I'm here to talk to you about the Starsearch All-
Squeshter 	ARE YOU SQUIDDING ME!? GET OUT OF MY LIFE! GET OUT! STOP RUINING MY SQUISH! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR SQUASHLY FACE AROUND HERE AGAIN!
Poffer Lord 	-Woah, woah, okay, geez, sorry! I'll go! I'm sorry! I'm sorry... (he quickly backs away and speedwalks back up the stairwell)
Taxi 	You went back to talk to Squeshter, huh?
Poffer Lord 	Uh, yeah.
Taxi 	Still mad?
Poffer Lord 	Very.
Taxi 	Refused your recruitment offer?
Poffer Lord 	Yeah.
Taxi 	Thank the stars...
Poffer Lord 	...yeah.
We see the four bubble guards sitting around a table in the breakroom eating plastic-wrapped ice creams.	We see the four bubble guards sitting around a table in the breakroom eating plastic-wrapped ice creams.
Pubble Police 	And the poor soppy sops tried to blame it on the king's jester! Silliest thing I've ever-
BOOM 	BOOM
Radio 	[BZZT BZZT -units to the Soaphall district. I repeat. All units to the- BZZT -we are under attack by an unidentified- BZZT -blue- BZZT -the scale of which- -mass danger- BZZT BZZT BZZT]
The radio feed dissolves to static. 	The radio feed dissolves to static.
Opple Cop 	We really gotta ask for higher quality radios.
Pubble Police 	Doesn't sound that urgent. Guess we gotta go take a look.
The group leisurely get up and start floating towards the door. 	The group leisurely get up and start floating towards the door.
Dubble Doorman 	I think the chief's been embezzling our budget.
Gubble Guard 	...what makes you think that?
Dubble Doorman 	Oh, little hints here and there. Pretty sure he bought a new car.
Pubble Police 	Doesn't seem that suspicious.
Dubble Doorman 	It's an old-timey kingdom, guys, NOBODY buys cars!
Elsewhere, Suddle Bubb is backstage, sifting through her notes. An attendant appears.	Elsewhere, Suddle Bubb is backstage, sifting through her notes. An attendant appears.
Sudviser 	One more disappointing performance and you're done.
Suddle Bubb nods silently. The attendant leaves without a word. 	Suddle Bubb nods silently. The attendant leaves without a word.
Suddle Bubb 	(whispering to herself) E-everyone loves you, you still have talent, j-just play it natural and-
BOOM 	BOOM
Suddle Bubb 	W-what the-
The roof caves open. 	The roof caves open.
Category:Chapters