Canada Goose

Dear god. Why do I have to do this?
Canada geese are the most evil creatures on the entire planet. They're worse than scorpions, spiders, wasps, those damn centipedes you find in your room that look like Cthulhu's bowel movements, hell, even Emus. Emus PISS themselves in the presence of geese. I'm not even exaggerating, either, the geese's evil energy literally causes them to involuntarily urinate on the spot. A single goose is as evil as WaWaWaWaTinky-Winky, and a single flock can drive a hysteria-induced evacuation of entire towns - and this isn't even accounting for the Giga-Geese that are rumoured to exist, according to legend.
== History ==
Four score and seven years ago In Ancient Canada, in what is now the city of Toronto, Ontario, Tim Horton realized he needed security for his fortress. Therefore, he contacted his evil brother Acererak Horton, a patron of the dark arts (and the Furry arts as well, which may well be the same thing) to make a security force. Acererak made a deal with Bob Saget's son Asmodeus, famous for his main role in Cuphead, to fix the problem with the ever-present rudeness of Canadians. However, Asmodeus tricked Acererak: once every 100 years, a single Canadian would be born truly evil. This lines up nicely with the existence of Justin Beaver, lending credence to the theory. In addition, the hatred of the Canadians living at the time would be concentrated into a single race, now known as geese.
Emerging in a 1,000-meter-tall whirlwind of waterfowl nearly a quarter-mile wide at its base, the geese were unleashed Southwestern Ontario and spread. Nowhere in North America was safe; operating on high-altitude stealth bomber technology that the Spartans just happened to have left out for them, raids across the United City-States of Pythea left billions dead and probably did some other nasty stuff too; this event may have been responsible for the retreat of Sparta from the New World and, in some controversial theories, the separation of N. Sanity Island from the mainland. The geese, being the warmongers they are, immediately reduced themselves to mere birds in a nuclear holocaust.
The H5N1 virus has bought humanity some time to prepare for the inevitable next assault (which may be beginning, according to insider reports from Canada), and may make a resurgence yet, but geese remain #3 on the top 5 existential threats to the UnWorld (with Soviet Russia at #5, Weegee at #4, teh evul alienz being at #2 and "deadly space rocks" at #1, respectively).
Some people feed them at parks.
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