The Collected Writings of Kurt Woods

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Back to Kurt Woods.
Various writings made by Kurt Woods. This will come to include songs, poems, and diary entrys. Made in chronological order.
== S4E39 - ZCPD: Murder, Mayhem, and Monkey ==
I watched the fire of my sin
I felt it tickle up my spine
It's daggers pierced my skin
Then a feeling of the divine
2020, April 4th
So yeah, my band, finally got a gig. Guess that solo act maybe got us some buzz. Things were going great. We were jamming. Lyra had actually shown up! Brian, Jared, and I had been practicing like crazy for the last bit. We've even decided on an album name, Arcane Gang Warfare. Our planned cover is this picture of me punching Showstopper in the face kinda edited it a bit to make it like one of those frame by frame photos.
So I guess a place to start for wher stuff went wrong is that Cardinal was a dick and had me send Jared home in the middle of our set since the Big Team Fan Club crowd that they had drawn to this book signing was very much not vibing. Guess it doesn't matter if your the president. Also we made a punk set for an up-scale restraunt. We pulled off the rest of the set and got paid. 
That doesn't matter much.
A light show starts going off outside the venue. Cypher and Cardinal just get up and ditch their signing. I announce that the signing is over so as to not have Big Team look like we are always clueless jerkwads. I make sure Brian and Lyra are good with cleaning up and finally head out 
We arrive at the scene basically looks like chaos inside of this print shop, Cover Business or something like that. I really didn't want to deal with that problem as Kurt. It was just too BS to be the nice stoner nerd who is always sympathetic when it is very obviously some sort of fighting thing. I make up some excuse about being too tired and how this is probably a minor thing and I need to help the band clear up. Cypher gives me some grief about how I am not a real hero and I just let her go at me. It's what to be expected I guess.
Eventually I get back having summoned Mr. Otter and changed into my Libra costume. I see Cypher messing with shit in the back and blinding light from the basement. I jump down using Mr Otter's eyes as my sight since he does not perceive through the reflection of light. Cardinal is speaking to some nerdy-looking ant-eater scientist. There's this kid bouncing all over the place, the one I had called Flashlight(he had some other name but I don't remember it) at that Big High Announcement a while back, and I decide I need to pin him. So I do. I hold him in place until Cypher unleashes this depowering foam which at first did more to Cardinal, Mr. Otter, and I. Then she unleashes some flame that changes the shape of the foam all around us to wrap around Flashlight. 
As soon as we are starting to get out of the foam, the cops show up and start clearing us out of the laboratory. I give them some grief over it. Eventually, the three of us Big team members regroup to assess our plan of action. There is some more Kurt criticism. Guess it is just standard Big Team banter when I am not there as Kurt or with someone who knows. I hope Ern or Faith are on my next mission because I swear I might snap if I have to sit through another "Kurt isn't a hero" talk with a Big Team member. 
Sorry that's off topic.
I had received some intel when I was harassing the cops about a cop who wants to rat to us. Cardinal had some device that could track the Zodiac Tree Sap that the Scientist had been refining or something. So we took Cardinal's lead first which took us to some dead ends and with Cardinal falling off a rooftop. Cypher and I were semi-sure he had died so we called an ambulance. Once he was gone Cypher and I got to talking. She was avoidant however when I talked about the Seekers involvement in this must have made her uncomfortable. We decide to head to meet the cop.
The cop meets us in alleyway. He gives us some intel in regards to the cops overlooking various wrong doings going on with Bishop in order to have better Rubicon armor created. Rubicon Black or something like that. He also suggested we destroy the Lab under the print shop to prevent the cops or Bishop gettin their hands on it.
So Cypher and I head there. A tough looking Rubicon is defending the front of the shop so I send Mr Otter ahead to scout things out. However as soon Mr. Otter starts to scout things out a giant bat transformed person who looked to be using some of the sap attacked the Rubicon. Then things devolved into chaos with the Rubicon summoning spectral warriors and a wall of green flame around the print shop.
Cardinal finally showed up. Cypher sprung a plan together to get Cardinal inside and to protect him from the spectral flame. That went perfect Cardinal getting inside. The warriors charged Cypher and I but I charged them back and popped behind them absorbing some of them energy and as they turned Cypher smashed into them with a glaive. Then the print shop exploded. Cardinal rolling out in the nick of time.
A spire of flame rose across the horizon shadowing the fighting Rubicon and Bat. I yelled to the other two that I would handle the flame. I did Mr. Otter and I absorbing a great deal of the energy it was overwhelming. It all collased and ignited me. I felt euphoric. My head arush with adrenaline. I knew how future me must feel wielding what they do and with that fear I managed to hold the energy that I had in. At some point Cardinal and Cypher had tied up the two goliath fighters. They put out the last of the flame
Cypher and I had a brief talk and she assured me that I was Libra. That I was a a hero. I assured her that reputations didn't matter. That we knew we were doing the right thing. After that I am pretty sure I headed to that warehouse future me had taken me too. I traced the dusty fading sigils on the ground and laid down on the floor. 
I thought of how all consuming that fire had been. How if I kept taking in power like that would I become like him? Did Future Kurt get here that same way? Is this how that starts? I don't know and I am scared. I want to just curl up and disappear rn but I wrote this all down so that means I am at least acknowledging it. That's a first step. I can get through this just I don't know how to get beyond this point.
== S4E51 - How Bout It? ==
2020, April 19th
So I went to this roller derby thing with Ernest today. To be quite honest, he kinda told me about it in a voluntelling way? I would have anyways because like I want to be on better terms with Boon. It also like was Ernest and I's month anniversary or whatever? Is that significant? Did he know that? What if he doesn't like me enough to think about that?
'''
Oh wait right we made out today.... also like we're always hanging out all the time now. I guess that means he probably likes me.
'''
Oh but back to the derby thing. We can talk about making out later... probably, hopefully...
'''
So we arrive there, Box, Rewind, and Taxon were also there when we arrived. I was kinda eyeing Box. He was that weird guy always asking everyone to come in for check ups. Ernest assured me it was just him being a little weird idk still very off-putting. The others seemed okay if a little quiet. This event organizer approaches and kinda gives an overview of the roles. I immediately volunteered for the penalty box because uh I wanted to jeer people that got penalized... Oh also Ernest and I both chose that for reasons. 
'''
So we head over there and Molly(?), some jerk from Boon's Derby team, tells us what we have to do. She seems to have some sort of beef with Boon. Guess this was who Boon was telling me about in detention. Honestly wanted to get her stirred up to her suspended from Derby longer. Probably would have at least bothered her since Ernest and had planned to kinda just make out in the penalty box. Also how do you get suspended from Derby? It has like no rules? 
'''
While she was telling us about how to run the penalty box some aliens showed up and like kinda kidnapped us. And all the derby players. Teleporting us into their massive derby arena spaceship combo. They went into some tirade about how our form of roller derby was lame because we don't use powers and also then proceeded to inform us that they had stolen the power of our derby players or something like that. So we pointed out that contradiction and proceeded to bully them. Pretty hard. I think we went too hard cus they went to the "it's just a prank, bro" excuse but like saying "it's just for a show." I hate people like that. I mean like don't get me wrong I love wrestling when "it's just for a show" but everyone knows. Everyone consented. This was different.
'''
So they forced us all to play as the derby team since we bullied them I guess? Despite none of us having any experience. So y'know we proceeded to kick their ass. I was down as soon as they said there were basically no contact rules plus no restrictions on my powers. We put Ernest as our Jammer since he was the fastest. The rest of us served as blockers. I immediately set about just beating up everyone, especially their jammer. I may have went a little too far a few times but everyone got up I guess? 
'''
I even got to yeet Rewind, Ryan? I should ask what they prefer? They were pretty nice about that whole thing. I'd like to get to know them more. Though they seem like an even bigger nerd than Faith. Though that might be refreshing and anyways nerds I guess are most of my friends. They also did a pretty good job of the whole derby thing I figured.
'''
Box, the weird medical guy, wasn't doing too hot the entire time. Kinda got beat up a lot and couldn't stay on his skates for too long. Felt kinda sorry for him. Didn't know how to help though since there was a crowd and the stakes were making sure these Derby Aliens didn't do this kinda shit again and crushing them. 
'''
Ernest was amazing. Just like zooming by so quick. Lightning shooting off everywhere. Past all those blockers without a problem. God like he's just so good at power stuff. I need to get him to help me test out my own sometime since I have been getting use to his lightning energy from that static. At least I think I am. It is different from how I feel with other energy. Iit just feels easier. I guess kinda how things feel when Ernest is around, easier. 
'''
Oh also I figure Taxon was doing stuff I didn't see much of them? They helped here and there but didn't do much  otherwise
'''
At half-time Box took himself off for health reasons. Some derby kid joined us for the last half. We won pretty easily trouncing them. I yeeted Ernest at the end then immediately jumped on top of him when he excitedly got back up from my throw. I might have accidentally made out a little bit with my boyfriend on alien tv.....(Sorry dads if you had to see that I don't know our cable package) Ryan did tease us for that... and also because we did kinda keep going when the ship started falling out of the sky.... Ernest did float the ship to safety though when we both realized it was serious and landed it safely in the bay.
'''
I wanted to get out of there right away to head home to uh do more stuff.... with Ernest so like I did that speed-running thing I have done a few times but uh kind fucked it up. I ended up in the bay. I yelled something dumb about wanting to make out and instantly he was out there lightning wings in tow. God he looked fucking cute like that he scooped me out of the water but the electro-pulse attracted some sharks then Ryan was there FUCKING PUNCHING A SHARK LIKE HELL YEAH! The Derby Girl used her special green rope to whip us back to the spaceship. So we call GAIA up since none of us can think of a better way. 
When they get there in the submarine, we all hop in. Ernest and I sneak off to some like corner of the. We uh did that thing you know the one I have been freaking out about this entire journal. Y’know we made out. It was uh pretty nice…………. Guess I am gay or something ………. Ahsdsf. It’s not like we haven’t before just like idk sometimes it feels different after a long day or y’know on something like a 1-month-versery. (I am making it a thing) It’s just something reassuring in a world as shake-y as all this. Like villains show up everywhere so like just being able to make out sometimes really just reminds me that I am just a teen and I am allowed to do teenage things. Allows me to feel safe and comfy
Ernest did leave two hickeys on my neck and uh I did have to explain that to my dads. I didn’t expect to be having not only the second TALKtm   but also the third one. Can’t like dad coordinate these kinds of things? I mean I guess it is good to know they are both there for m-  Ooooooh that’s why they did it that way. Also probably to embarass me more and tease me more about the love marks… They didn’t say Ernest couldn’t stay over anymore either so hehehehehe
== S4E53 - Time Spent (A.K.A Crushed Grass) ==
2020, April 25th
Transcribed by the office and faculties of Mr. Otter, Esq. herein referred to as “:3” 
A description of their time displacement by Kurt Woods, Enforcer Libra, herein referred to as “K”:
So, huh, how do you write about something that happened a year ago from your perspective that technically happened today. I should have thought about this more. Maybe if I had written it when I got there? God that would have been smarter. Oh wait maybe I did? Not quite sure, my memory has been fuzzy about my time there since I got back. Glad I was lucky enough to still have my phone so we could type this out and also it would have been shitty to have lost all my contacts. I came back and got Overgrowth and Whisper out of the heart of the tree like I said I would. Whisper had set up some sort of barrier in protection of- Oh but I guess this is getting way ahead of myself.
Might as well start with the earlier parts that I remember. So after leaving my instruments with Bryan I got a message from GAIA about some Bishop folks on the east side of town and alerting us to the possibility of their involvement in the tree tremors. I ran over there head on. Met up sort of with Overgrowth (Hovergrowth, I believe is what they called that form though- :3) jumped off trying to fight the troops and keep Mr. Otter safe. Always putting you in danger these days, well not these days but I do need to be more careful, sorry buddy. However something went wrong with Overgrowth’s powers and they reacted with the trees dragging all in.
This is where the details get foggy for me. The Bishop soldiers are gone when we wake up. We begin to wander the sanctuary of- what was her name? The Morrigan, the Winter Knight, I think. Overgrowth was nervous as we made our way through it the tree itself bending time and space around us. This nervousness very evidently became panic upon our arrival at the portal to the heart of the Zodiac Tree which is a pocket fey realm or something analogous. Some past trouble with a fey being that will come up later. I promise that as a teleporter I and/or Mr Otter could get him out of there. I wasn’t quite sure of that, it was mostly a lie but y’know as they say “stick to the mission.”
We head in through the portal and meet up with Whisper who had found her own way in. In this large open meadow surrounded by forest. They (I think it was both of them - K) connect with the tree and the plant life. So they lead us the way that we are desired to go. Frankie gets herself tied up in the whole Kurt-Libra business. I remember that she mentions some sort of animosity towards Ernest. I didn’t pay too much attention other than to remember the basic “tell her to talk about it with him.”
Eventually we entered the forest. The trees were thick for a while (What does that even mean? How long is a while? - K) until we reached the clearing and there was the fey being that had changed Overgrowth to be honest I don’t even remember her name at this point. After some staring down, villainous monologuing, and one failed psychic battle between her and Whisper later we go to leave. Unfortunately for us, fey realms are only easily navigated by those that are fey or fey touched. Which she was happy to tell us so I proceeded to drain her of her energy. Huh, guess I have been technically fey-touched for a while now. Wait does that mean-? Shit. Wait but stay on topic. No need for theories yet. We can talk more about the future later. We’ve got time. (Ha!-:3 This is gonna get old fast-K)
So uh fey-person is pissed at us and Overgrowth decides to keep her busy and fight her. Whisper and I ditch leaving Mr. Otter behind and well-hidden to be Overgrowth’s guide.(It was really scary :((((- :3 You did a really good job despite that buddy-K REALLY!?!?-:3 Yeah like always!-K) I had an easy time navigating us through the forest and after easily avoiding some Bishop agents with my teleporting. Whisper and I arrive at the edge of the heart proper. We see it at the top of a mountain in the centre of another large tall grass meadow but no matter how much we walk we would never get closer.
I asked for some privacy with the heart and the meadow and Whisper readily gave it to me. I de-masked, also taking off the cowl, and kneeled down in the meadow. I remember every second of this distinctly. I let out a sharp breath letting my time wash over me feeling how tired I was. How sore my muscles were. How those burn scars hadn’t quite healed into the start of the pattern yet. I talked to the tree directly. I thought of my time with Ernest. That easy smile he always had and those dorky blushy looks that he gave me. All the times that he helped me with music or Big Team stuff or whatever. All that time we were boyfriends and had each other’s back so easily. I thought of my dads. I thought of how they let me be who I was. The passion in Papa Vano’s voice when he was excited about his latest bake sale for whatever charity it was this month. The smile in Papa Ley’s eyes as he would pick up Vano and tell him about the latest magical oddity he had found for the shop. Just having dinner with them... (Are you okay? You are crying- :3 Yeah buddy it’ll be alright-K I am just gonna rest in your lap anyways- :3) I thought of Big Team Fan Club. Who Faith has become. How impressive it was that she did all the Big Team stuff that she did without powers. The sincerity behind everything she does. She’s a lot more confident these days. The way in which Tony was static just big, dumb, and lovable. I thought about all my friends. You, Mr. Otter. Nicholas Goldman. Currently Unnamed Band. A few Big Team members. Everyone else. Then I thought of myself and I realized that the mask wasn’t me and I confessed this to the tree. That I was defined by my community and connection to it not my separation from it and for once that I wanted to protect part of it.  
I sensed you and Overgrowth nearing having handily taken care of the fey problem and Whisper seeming to have finished making her own offering. I put the mask and cowl back on knowing internally that it meant something different now. Overgrowth and Frankie made their own offerings which I did not pry into. As we neared the heart we saw portals. They showed each of us events from our past, the events our teammates were going through, and our futures. Unfortunately my future is a little more real than most others and saw right back at us. So Future Kurt stepped through from some generic-looking dark academia place. (NGL IT WAS EXACTLY MY IDEAL STUDY AESTHETIC AND I HATE THAT - K)  He begins monologuing about powers, me wasting them, not knowing what it means to truly have power and use it, and how my life generally is utterly worthless. So I yell at him “stop,” a simple command nothing more, and everything seems to frame skip. The gentle tall grass billowing pops back to where it should be. My mask and cowl are gone as they had been minutes ago in the grass. It was a lie anyways. There was only ever Kurt Woods. Then another stutter just for a moment this time and I am beside him throwing him forward into the portal he came through. Another stutter, the portal that  he had come through is closed and I am walking back to the group. A thought of victory and the idea of a smile creep into my head.  Then one final stutter and we were gone.  
I don’t really know where to go from here. I arrived in the future? That I got hurled 30 years forward? I don’t know what you expect me to describe. It’s shifting in my memory as I think about it. I guess maybe some of the main details. Well, I guess for starters I very quickly learned that I was out of the loop on everything. Big Team was long since disbanded. Superfolks were kind of a taboo and reviled by society at large. Powers were illegal for those without official sanction. Propaganda around the menace of [insert enemy of the day here] and how the hardship of today was for the benefit of a greater day tomorrow. Y’know standard capitalism stuff but without the pretense of pretending things are great for everyday folks. I pretty quickly changed out of the costume when that stranger that I know Future Kurt sent offered me a spare set of clothes and a backpack. Everything was this strange combination of magic and technology. Very similar to the Rubicon tech of today but much more refined. The cities were a mix of traditional builds and towering skyscrapers carved from what seemed to be the same slab of metal. I was, of course, an oligarch. A member of an organization called The Fold. Everyone I knew was nowhere to be found. 
So I did the one thing that my dads told me to do when I was lost or couldn’t find them and that was to go to the shop. It wasn’t there. Just like a vast emptiness of space where it should be. It should have been there but it was just gone and for some reason the other passersby didn’t notice or as I found out later chose to ignore it. We got many dirty looks that first day. We didn’t even have the communication device of the time. We wandered the streets and eventually found a place that wasn’t so much a place as an idea of a place. Something that sought you out more than you did it. We just called it home for the most part. I guess the Mists was what a few of us called it. It was an old mansion that we kept repaired enough for newcomers and all the other inhabitants. A place for rejects of the current society. Place was filled with those folks who wanted to be heroes and also those who were forced to be. We hid there for a long time getting a bearing on the world around us and particularly establishing contact with the Consortium who were who I worked with a lot in the early days of things. As Mr. Otter,(Oh that’s me-:3 Yeah it is you adorable silly otter-K) notes at the beginning I am technically an Enforcer in the Consortium that doesn’t really mean much I was free to do wha- 
----
Kurt looked down at the small otter in his lap who held a small green glowing sigil above the phone that rested on the otter’s belly. With each slight twist of the glowing sigil and the Otter’s paws a new word appeared on the phone’s notepad. “Hold on Mr. Otter, could we continue this later? I just realized I need to give him a call and see if he’s free.” Kurt’s face tightened up holding something back. He sat up a bit adjusting where they sat on the edge of the building. “Just, I'm free now. This is all being written for posterity’s sake. Not for me. I want to call my dads.  I want to call my goddamn boyfriend.”
Mr. Otter gave a slow nod. The sigil disappeared with a green spark. The familiar held out the phone between his hands and Kurt took it rolling through his contacts. The phone had been holding its charge exactly at 2% for longer than any phone should as Kurt continued to stare at it. He had sent many texts to family and close friends already but he didn’t know who to call first. Finally, he did choose. 
“Hey, did you get my texts?” His voice was shaky and low. “Where are you? I really need to talk in-person?”
== S4E60 - Tomorrow Night (A.K.A Aim and Fire) ==
Transcribed by Kurt Woods, Enforcer Libra, herein referred to as “K.” Transcribed on May 3rd.
A description of the theft of a piece of the Night’s Paragon and how to get recruited by the Consortium of the Present:
'''
So, I guess I am gonna start off by saying that when I picked up the habit of writing these from- uh, sorry I don’t quite remember who that was. Regardless, these are written to both inform my successor(s?) and to help me cope better with the high stress of my situation.
Nicholas sent me on a mission to assist Conmoro today. Kurt, he’d say, you must help my good friend Conmoro. He is in quite a bit of trouble. There have been a string of break-ins stealing our pieces of the Night’s Paragon and this is not good at all. Others will be reaching out  to your teammates so keep an eye out, young Kurt.
He just feels like such an adorable grandpa. It’s really nice and a good change from all the people that are always talking down to me. So arrive on the scene after seeing Cypher messaging about needing help with some Consortium-related stuff. Upon arrival at the Consortium Library, I am getting looks from Cypher and Conmoro. 
Cypher would approach me. Oh uh Kurt why are you in Libra’s Costume?
Oh, I am them. 
Oh. She’d give me a quizzical look and get caught up in her thoughts. She apologized for how she had talked to Kurt and I accepted because that doesn’t matter too much anymore. Then things moved along.
Conmoro was getting their ears chewed off with questions about everything magic by Box. (More like ChatterBox. It’s not like he contributes anything else to missions-K) The quiet person in the armor, Taxon, was also there.(Guess that’s their deal. Just kinda being there and doing their okay-est -K) Then out of nowhere the other person there, Challenge, (Yeah that Challenge eye-roll-K) runs at this wall and up it before proceeding to just fall off halfway up and hit the ground hard. She got up so I guess she is a little tougher than Cardinal. (Good thing too. It would suck in my first mission back that Cypher and I would have to call an ambulance yet again for someone-K)
Eventually though Conmoro and Cypher speak a bit about the situation. I listen carefully noting how similar it was to how Nicholas described. A piece of the Night’s Paragon had been stolen and the thieves might be coming back to grab more documents since they had documentation about the other pieces. Conmoro turns to me after all this to make a veiled insult about the first time we met and said they look forward to seeing what I can do today. (Asshole. Oh by default most Consortium Enforcers are assholes. So this isn’t anything against Conmoro. It makes it easier for us to disregard the wishes of others. Especially since sometimes you need to do something that looks pretty evil to do a good thing-K)
So we set up. Cypher making a plan for us to ambush them in the vault that they had stolen from earlier. Box just wandered off. Taxon and Cypher set up on the roof. Challenge and I hid in the vault together. Mr. Otter had al- Oh hey that’s me! (Hey buddy, I see your nap is done. Do you want to join in on this too?-K Heck Yeah- :3)
A continued transcription of their experience on the second of May, 2020 by Kurt Woods, Libra (Continuing to be referred to as “K”) and Mr. Otter (herein referred to as “:3”):
Mr. Otter had also entered along with Challenge’s own companion, Trevor, the iconic Big Team mascot at least in the forum communities. (Might be a mascot but he isn’t very fun to play with >:/ -:3 I know buddy, we’ll find you some nicer friends, soon okay?-K Okay but no one mean- :3) I inspect the magical seal in the vault noticing there is a gap in the air duct that could work as a teleportation route. Shit goes down outside not quite sure what and eventually Eventually the fighting outside degrades to the point that Challenge and I leave the vault. I leave Mr. Otter in the Vault to draw some sigils for teleportation and some other surprises. (Sigils are fun. -:3) 
So immediately Challenge, Cypher and I are in this fight just outside the vault with the Seekers.(Of course, it’s always the Seekers no matter your place in the timeline. Always stealing something dark and magical-K) One of them is berating Cypher over something. I kinda ignored this and went for this weird guy with a backpack and a magic shadow gun. In the scuffle I get the gun away from him and shoot him in the leg. It didn’t fire a real bullet, just a magical weapon similar to Reaper ones I presume and fired something like that. The man’s eyes change colour and he has a moment of clarity in his pain seeming to come out of a trance or a possession and tells me to get the backpack off of him.(Internally, I promised then and there that I wouldn’t let this person continue to deal with the piece in his backpack. I have read a bit and been told about the influence they can have. No one, deserves to have no control.-K) Suddenly, everyone has stopped fighting even though we were clearly winning as Box, through our communicators, says that he negotiated a surrender and the enemy retreat.
This was all-around a terrible idea. (If you have a crab upside-down on your tummy and a stone in your paws, you bring the stone down.- :3 Exactly, letting them leave with everything would’ve been a loss because they get away and can lick their wounds and keep the piece they stole.-K) So I break the peace immediately slapping a sigil sticker on to the backpack teleporting it back to the vault. Challenge joins in fighting them off. Making sure it hurts. Taxon's there as well hitting folks and trying their best. Cypher dipped out of the fight into the vault and to steal the piece but I shut the door. We needed to talk first. Eventually the Seekers start to retreat after some more time.
So when they were gone I teleported into the vault using one of my(Our Sigils- :3) our sigils. I’d give Cypher a peeved look. Why were you trying to steal it? I half-knew the why.
I need them all to destroy the Night’s Paragon. She’d respond. The Consortium isn’t doing anything and can’t even protect them.
I’d look her up and down and see she means it. Then it all hit me like a car. You know in the future you wanted the same. That version of you, she failed and got fucked over. She was corrupted by the Night’s Paragon. Diversifying who helps you and how the pieces are spread could make this an easier burden to bear and not one you are bearing by yourself.  
She gave me a look that one you give someone when you feel lost. The Consortium isn’t that though. So what should I do?
'''
I can take it, I’d say. If you help with my future self bs I’ll help you with this.
Alright, but Conmoro? Her voice almost concerned but more for me than for any genuine concern over Conmoro's well-being. 
Conmoro is full of shit. I replied knowing I could smooth it over with Nicholas.(And I did-K) Then we left with my teleportation and she outlined to me how to protect the piece. I guess it’s my burden for now. 
I hope this turns out well for her sake. The person that she becomes and the power that she wields just that raw evil that bends others to her will. That's scary. I am glad I never got too close to her in the future in any of those fights. That thing though that isn’t Cypher, I don't see her trying to influence other's minds like that and if the Night's Paragon has that kind of influence over the guy with the magic with just a single piece. What could the complete thing do to someone? That's way too scary. So maybe if I can help her in destroying the Paragon that'll prevent at least that outcome? And I'll be able to at least let someone retain control over their life and future. Idk, I guess we’ll just have to see if that works out.
Oh, Nicholas was mostly fine with everything seemed a little worried at first that I intended to betray him or something. I assured him that I was protecting the piece as a middle ground for Cypher and the Consortium but also because I would be the only one aware of where it is and how to get to it. It went over easy enough and I suggested that this be kind of a trial for me joining the Consortium. He agreed. Which means I am getting paid again which is nice.
Now, lets hope things will get back to normal in terms of my personal life soon. I don't want for things to be this awkward with Ernest. I just want to kiss him and when we've been hanging out lately both of us have been hesitating to touch or even talk about it and that's been rough. Sorry, for whoever has to read a teenage NB lamenting about how he and his kinda-boyfriend, kinda-not-boyfriend are having relationship problems. I just figured this might be the one easy thing in regards to all this but I guess not. Well that and I didn't think my memory would be this foggy and give me this many headaches. I think my return messed with things so my memory is a little more shifting than I remember. Anyways, an adorable Otter familiar has fallen asleep in my lap so I am gonna read some and then probably move us to the bed.
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