Spy Heroes/transcript

Previous Episode: Crushed Timeline
== Transcript ==
Episode Aired: June 7, 2003
Episode Copyrighted: 2003
This episode is rated TV-Y7.
The whirlpool beginning of the Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy show sequence is shown saying "Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy" and the Action Narrator begins.
Narrator: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy.
The scene changes to show Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy in chains.
They have been captured by Lord Dominator. The scene pans out.
Masked Lord Dominator: *laughs*
The image changes to show Dominator holding up a feather, tickled to the point of wetting themselves. The image changes to show Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy in the chains. A drip sound is heard. The image changes to show Dominator pushing a lever and sending a chain of doom... The image changes to show Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy chained up and heading to the lava at the bottom.
Masked Lord Dominator: *laughs*
The laughter is covered up by the Narrator.
Narrator: The lava of doom.
The bomb explodes.
Mr. Best and Mr. Beat: *goes to Dominator’s ship*
Mr. Best: Not so fast, Lord Dominator.
Masked Lord Dominator: *transforms into Lord Dominator*
Lord Dominator: Huh?
Mr. Best: Like the unbeatable toy of a bowling pin. *picks up a bowling pin*
The image changes to show Lord Dominator maniacally laughing. Her maniacal laughter stops.
Lord Dominator: The toy new prize no mortal can resist?
The image changes to show Mermaid Man, Barnacle Boy, Mr. Best and Mr. Beat heading down the lava.
Barnacle Boy: Yup.
Lord Dominator: *walks onscreen* Ooh, I just love bowling pin product.
Narrator: Of course you do, Lord Dominator.
The scene pans out and shows a bowling pin toy and it says "FREE BOWLING PINS!!!" in Comic Sans MS above it.
Narrator: And for a limited time, get your free bowling pins made with bombs.
The Scene changes back to Dominator in chains and holding the bowling pin toy. The scene pans out to show Mermaid Man, Barnacle Boy, Mr. Best and Mr. Beat on corners of her.
Lord Dominator: How can I be evil with this good toy?
Mermaid Man, Barnacle Boy, Mr. Best and Mr. Beat: *on screen, laughs*
Lord Dominator: *growls* Stop laughing!
The scene changes to show Master Lox at his lair watching the commercial on the TV.
Lord Master Lox: Lord Dominator? Who'd fall for that schlock? *walks to over to see the full of kids* It’s those kids.
Ashley Roberts: *waves*
Lord Master Lox: Never trust kids.
All Human Kids: Yay! *steps on Master Lox*
Lord Master Lox: Ow.
Ashley Roberts: We're gonna be spies.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Yeah.
Lincoln Loud: What should we do first?
Leni Loud: I know, the city.
Yellow Rectangle: The city, here we go!
Slide transition cuts to the city where SpongeBob, Yellow, Lincoln, Leni and Ashley are spying from the side of a building.
Leni Loud: What's he doing now?
Lincoln Loud: Nothing yet. Wait! Wait! He's...
Plankton: *walks into "Guppies R Us"*
Lincoln Loud: ...buying baby clothes? We gotta get closer.
Plankton: Excuse me? *holds up a small pink outfit* Do you have anything in a size negative five?
Employee: *laughs* Sorry, bud, that's as small as they come.
He takes the outfit.
Plankton: *sighs and walks away*
SpongeBob SquarePants: *enlarges myself in the clothes on the wall* Wow, Plankton has to buy baby clothes?
Leni Loud: *enlarges myself in the outfit next to SpongeBob* How embarrassing.
Yellow Rectangle, Lincoln Loud and Ashley Roberts: *pops up from clothes*
Plankton walks out of "Guppies R Us."
SpongeBob SquarePants: *walks out a couple seconds later* SpongeBob to Krabs. Come in Krabs.
Mr. Krabs: Krabs here. Go ahead.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Plankton just bought some baby clothes.
Mr. Krabs: Baby clothes? Hmm... *writes 'baby clothes' on the chalkboard* What's he doing now?
SpongeBob SquarePants: Hold on. *looks through the store window* He's buying...
Mr. Krabs: Yeah? Yeah?
SpongeBob SquarePants: A... stamp.
Mr. Krabs: A stamp. *writes 'stamp' on the chalkboard* This is the most elaborate scheme ever. Keep on him, SpongeBob.
Cuts to later where SpongeBob, Yellow, Lincoln, Leni and Ashley are tip-toeing behind Plankton.
Yellow Rectangle: We're right behind him, and he has no idea!
From Plankton's POV, the tip-toes are thunderous steps. He turns around.
Plankton: Would you stop making all that racket?
From SpongeBob, Yellow, Lincoln, Leni and Ashley's POV, Plankton is squeaking as he talks so they can't understand him.
Leni Loud: What's he doing now?
Lincoln Loud: I can't tell.
Walk again but Lincoln is shining a light on Plankton from the magnifying glass.
Plankton: Whew! Gosh, it's hot. *catches on fire* Ahhhh!
Yellow Rectangle: He's getting away! Quick, guys, use the jet-pack!
Leni Loud: Can do! *pushes a button and grabs SpongeBob, Yellow, Lincoln and Ashley*
As they fly toward Plankton.
Plankton: *jumps into a soda drink and puts myself out* Whew. Huh?
SpongeBob SquarePants, Yellow Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *flies over Plankton, screaming, setting him and the cup on fire*
They fly through buildings, causing damage. The jet-pack detaches itself from Leni and they skid on the sidewalk. When they stand up, their faces and bodies are deformed.
Lincoln Loud: Boy, it was lucky the sidewalk broke our fall. But we've lost Plankton!
Ashley Roberts: To the spy mobile!
SpongeBob SquarePants, Yellow Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *hops into the car*
Yellow Rectangle: Hmmm... mines, oil slick, smoke screen, shield...
Leni Loud: Self destruct! *pushes self destruct button*
The car explodes.
SpongeBob SquarePants, Yellow Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *laughs*
Slide transition cuts to Master Lox's Lair.
SpongeBob SquarePants, Yellow Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *walks up to Master Lox's Lair and goes back into Master Lox's' laboratory and hears the bomb beeping*
SpongeBob SquarePants: What's that beeping sound?
Lincoln Loud: I don't know.
Yellow Rectangle: I'll turn the light on. *turns on the lights*
Leni Loud: Great thinking, Yellow.
SpongeBob SquarePants, Yellow Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *goes to the wall and hears the bomb beeping rapidly*
The bomb explodes, destroying the wall.
Ashley Roberts: Ow.
Lincoln Loud: Master Lox, what are you doing?
Lord Master Lox: Sorry about the bomb. It's just bowling pins for free. *points to free bowling pins*
It says "FREE BOWLING PINS!!!" in Comic Sans MS above of the bowling pins.
Lord Master Lox: His plan must be something big.
Plankton: *walks in* Hello.
Lord Master Lox: Welcome to my lair.
Plankton: *jumps*
Lord Master Lox: I was just gonna ask if someone can steal the formula. It's a spy.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Spy?! Whoo-ooh-ooh! *acts like James Bond*
Patrick Star and Red Rectangle: *walks up*
Patrick Star: Hey, guys, I can see you through this straw.
Yellow Rectangle: Patrick, I'm going to be a spy.
Patrick Star: You're a spy?!
Screen cuts to outside of Master Lox's Lair as it rocks back and forth.
Patrick Star: I wanna be a spy, too!
Screen cuts back inside.
Red Rectangle: Me too.
Leni Loud: We're all spies.
Ashley Roberts: *gets the bowling shoes* Oh my gosh, bowling shoes.
Lord Master Lox: Okay! You can be a spy. Just be quiet.
SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star, Yellow, Red Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: Hooray, we're spy heroes!
Lord Master Lox: *stammers*
SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star, Yellow, Red Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *whispers* Spy heroes.
Lord Master Lox: Here, have a free bowling pin. *gives a bowling pin to Yellow* But remember, the fate of my secret lair rests in your hands, Yellow.
Yellow Rectangle: In my hands.
He looks at his hands.
Yellow Rectangle: Ooh!
Lord Master Lox: And there's a label on the back.
Yellow Rectangle: *looks on the back of the bowling pin*
The label says "PRESS HERE" in Comic Sans MS on the back of the bowling pin.
Yellow Rectangle: There's the button on top!
Ashley Roberts: I wear my bowling shoes.
Lincoln Loud: Let me see.
Leni Loud: OMGosh, it's beautiful!
Red Rectangle: Wow!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Ooh!
He grabs Yellow's hand and looks at it.
Patrick Star: Ooh.
Screen cuts to Yellow's house where SpongeBob, Patrick, Yellow, Red, Lincoln, Leni and Ashley live.
Yellow Rectangle: *puts a bowling pin on the table* There. Good as an award. *looks at the button on top of the bowling pin* I wonder what this button do. *pushes the button on the bowling pin*
Lord Master Lox: *on bowling pin speaker* Hello, this is Master Lox speaking. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to discover what Plankton is. Don't let him out of your sight. You'll need to rustle up some spy gadgets. If you don't accept it, Plankton will steal the formula from Mr. Krabs!
A duck quack sound effect is heard.
Lord Master Lox: This bowling pin bomb will explode in 10 seconds.
The timer appears on the led display above the font "TIMER" in Arial on the bowling pin. It starts a countdown in "00:10" in DSEG7 Classic Italic and the bowling pin bomb starts beeping, then it counts down to "00:09". It cuts back to SpongeBob, Patrick, Yellow, Red, Lincoln, Leni and Ashley while the bowling pin bomb beeps.
SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star, Yellow, Red Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *screams and runs around while the bowling pin bomb is beeping*
Screen cuts to the bowling pin bomb beeping and counting down in "00:08" in DSEG7 Classic Italic on the led display above the font "TIMER" in Arial.
Yellow Rectangle: *offscreen* Get rid of the bomb!
The bowling pin bomb keeps beeping and counts down to "00:07".
Yellow Rectangle: *offscreen* Get rid of the bomb!
Screen cuts back to SpongeBob, Patrick, Yellow, Red, Lincoln, Leni and Ashley while the bowling pin bomb beeps.
Yellow Rectangle: Get rid of the bomb, Patrick!
Patrick Star: *grabs the bowling pin bomb from the table, then runs to the front door and opens it, then throws the bowling pin bomb out from Yellow's house, then closes the front door, then runs back*
SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star, Yellow, Red Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *covers our ears*
Screen cuts to the neighbor's house, the bowling pin bomb lands inside while it's beeping. Screen cuts to the bowling pin bomb beeping and counting down in "00:03" in DSEG7 Classic Italic on the led display above the font "TIMER" in Arial, then it counts down to "00:02", then it counts down to "00:01" and the bowling pin bomb beeps rapidly. Screen cuts to the bowling pin bomb's led display close up counting down in "00:01" in DSEG7 Classic Italic, then it counts down to "00:00". Screen cuts back to the neighbor's house exterior. The bowling pin bomb explodes, destroying the neighbor's house.
Mr. Grouse: *yells out loud* LLLLOOOOUUUUDDDDSSSS!!!!
Screen cuts back to Yellow's house interior.
Patrick Star: Phew, that was close.
Slide transition cuts to Mr. Best and Mr. Beat's house in the kitchen.
Mr. Best: Hey, you're wasting flour, Mr. Beat.
Mr. Beat: Why are you just lazing around on your big butt?! You should be helping!
Mr. Best: My dad has got to do what he's an old man!
Mr. Beat: *sighs and rings a bell*
The seven immediately shows up.
Ashley Roberts: Heroes, reporting for duty!
Mr. Beat: Ashley! Should it just be your dad? Or should it truly be teamwork with heroes?
Mr. Best: Or should it just be my mom?!
Yellow Rectangle: I’d say your both parents! Lincoln, I like to meet your friend, Ashley! See!
Ashley Roberts: I’m glad I'm not fathering those kids!
SpongeBob SquarePants: See!
Mr. Beat: Well, my dad shouldn’t just dedicate his life to a stupid football match!
Mr. Best: It's a “football game!” And we have been winning the Super Bowl since 1985! Learn your facts!
Lincoln Loud: Guys! I have a plan! We go to his lair!
Slide transition cuts to Master Lox's at night. SpongeBob, Patrick, Yellow, Red, Lincoln, Leni, Ashley, Mr. Best and Mr. Beat are on the roof.
Mr. Beat: Okay, heroes, we're in position. Now how do we get inside?
Red Rectangle: I think the front door's open.
Lincoln Loud: Spies don't use the front door, Red. We've got to figure out a complicated way to get inside.
Patrick Star: This looks like a job for Patrick Star Bomb Pants! *explodes behind and makes a hole on the roof.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Good work, Patrick! Now it's my turn. *drops down inside, with the rope tied around me*
He lowers himself but hits the floor.
Patrick Star, Yellow, Red Rectangle, Lincoln Loud, Ashley Roberts and Mr. Beat: *lands on the floor*
Yellow Rectangle: I thought you were holding the rope–
Leni Loud: *lands on top of him* I am.
Patrick Star: Yeah. You need to be quiet.
Mr. Best: *screams and falls with whistling noise, then gets hurt by the floor* Ow!
Mr. Beat: You okay, Mr. Best?
Mr. Best: I'm okay, Mr. Beat. Someone lift me? We're on a secret mission.
Lord Master Lox: Secret mission, eh?
They scream and hold each other.
Lord Master Lox: Don't you think I know what you're up to? You want to go to the Chum Bucket without your boss and Plankton knowing.
Plankton: Pearl, Karen, we've got a customer!
SpongeBob, Patrick, Yellow, Red, Lincoln, Leni, Mr. Best and Mr. Beat are now seated at a table.
Lord Master Lox: I'll let you guys look over the menu.
Patrick Star: *nervously* Guys, I have to go.
Lincoln Loud: Can't you go later?
Patrick Star: *groans* My bomb pants aren't working right. *explodes a hole on the wall*
It vanishes.
Patrick Star: *sighs*
Lord Master Lox: Could I interest you in a raspberry iced tea?
Patrick Star: No, thank you.
Mr. Best: Looking good, Master Lox.
Lord Master Lox: Or perhaps a bran muffin?
Patrick Star: Guys, I have to go now!
Ashley Roberts: Patrick?!
Leni Loud: What's wrong?!
Lord Master Lox: Bowling Pin? *sees Patrick's behind bomb beeping* What the?
Screen pans out to Master Lox's Lair building where Patrick's bomb pants explodes everywhere as they all scream, then destroys Master Lox's Lair. Later, the floor opens up and a blimp emerges with Master Lox and Plankton controlling it from the inside.
Lord Master Lox: Destroy my lair, will ya, Mr. Krabs? Well, if it's war you want, it's war you'll get!
Plankton: Bring it on, Krabs!
Lord Master Lox: *flies my blimp over to the Bikini Bottom to the Krusty Krab*
The inside of the Krusty Krab gets darker.
Lori Loud: What's going on?
Mr. Krabs: Why's it dark? I think I put off my cataract surgery too long.
Squidward Tentacles: No, Mr. Krabs, it's that time of the month.
Mr. Krabs: *sees the blimp* Merciful Neptune!
The red light flashes.
Mr. Krabs: Man your battle stations!
Lori Loud: I'm on it! *runs into the bathroom and flushes a toilet*
Mr. Krabs: *raises myself in the crow's nest* Bring it on, Master Lox and Plankton.
Lord Master Lox: Oh, we will. We'll see if you have any customers left after I pump up the volume.
Loud music starts playing.
Fish Customers: *covers our ears*
Nat Peterson: Oh, brother, I hated the real version of this song.
Fish Customers: *starts to leave*
Mr. Krabs: They're driving me customers away! All right, Master Lox and Plankton, you want my customers so badly? *presses a button, a vacuum comes out and sucks up all the customers* You can have 'em! *launches the customers through a cannon aimed at the blimp*
As fish customers hit the blimp.
Plankton: Yes!
Lord Master Lox: Do your worst, Mr. Krabs!
Squidward Tentacles: *hits the blimp* I hate my job.
He slides down.
Lori and Lola Loud: *hits the blimp*
Lola Loud: This is taking forever, Lori.
They slide down.
Mr. Beat: We have to go now! Come on, Mr. Best!
Mr. Best: Okay!
Mr. Best and Mr. Beat: *flies away with our rocket boots and leaves*
Yellow Rectangle: *watches from the top of the blimp* It's up to you and us, Patrick!
Patrick Star: Abandon ship! *screams and jumps off the blimp with falling whistling noise*
He lands in the cannon and is blasted back toward the blimp.
Lord Master Lox: It's Patrick with his head!
Plankton: Pointy-headed projectile on the port side!
Patrick Star: *makes a hole in the blimp*
It's causing it to fly around.
Mr. Krabs: Ha ha ha! Huh? *gasps*
As the blimp, now on fire, is falling down to the Krusty Krab.
Mr. Krabs: No!
The blimp destroys the Krusty Krab.
Plankton: *groans*
Lord Master Lox: *stands on the Krusty Krab sign with a piece of paper in my hand* I win! I always win! *evil laughs*
Lincoln Loud: Not to rain on your parade or anything, but you always lose.
Lord Master Lox: No, Lincoln, I always... *grabs my head and rips it off, turning into Mr. Krabs*
Mr. Krabs: ...win!
Lincoln Loud: *gasps* Mr. Krabs?
SpongeBob SquarePants: Mr. Krabs?
Yellow Rectangle: Mr. Krabs?
Mr. Krabs: *jumps off the sign* That's right! *rips the body of Master Lox's disguise off* I stole me own formula!
Yellow Rectangle: But if you're Mr. Krabs, he’s Plankton, then who's...
The other Mr. Krabs rips off his suit to show the Robot Krabs.
Yellow Rectangle: Mr. Krabs is a robot!
Robot Krabs opens its head up to reveal Plankton.
Plankton: No, you idiot.
The other Plankton rips off his suit to show Master Lox.
Lord Master Lox: I was in Plankton’s suit.
Yellow Rectangle: Master Lox?! What the flop is going on here?
Mr. Krabs: You see, we had a bet. Plankton's been trying for twenty years to steal me formula, and he's never done it!
Plankton: I almost had it thirty-seven times, and you know it!
Lord Master Lox: Yeah!
Mr. Krabs: *shows my claw at Plankton* Tell it to the claw, sister. Last time he failed, we made a bet.
Flashback to Mr. Krabs laughing while Master Lox and Plankton are crying on the ground.
Mr. Krabs: You can't beat me, Master Lox and Plankton. I always win!
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: *stops crying*
Plankton: You've got the easy part. I'd like to see you do my job.
Mr. Krabs: *picks Plankton up* Oh, yeah, right. If I was you, I could steal me formula on me first try.
Plankton: Ha! The usual wager?
Mr. Krabs: You're on.
Flashback ends.
Mr. Krabs: So, through a series of events far too elaborate to go into right now, we flawlessly assumed each other's lives; and I beat Master Lox and Plankton at their own game.
Screen cuts to destroyed Master Lox’s Lair.
Mr. Krabs: *offscreen* And destroyed his place of business!
Screen cuts back to Mr. Krabs.
Mr. Krabs: *laughs* Now pay up.
Lord Master Lox: Here you go, Eugene. *takes out a dollar* One a-dollar.
Patrick Star: Not so fast! *rips my bodysuit off to reveal Lori*
Lincoln Loud: Lori? Then who are you? *tears off her face, revealing facial muscles*
Lori Loud: I’m not wearing a disguise! *puts my face back on*
Lori, Lola Loud and Squidward Tentacles: *walks away*
Yellow Rectangle: Hmmm, if she's Lori, then you must be...
Lori Loud: *rips off my suit to reveal Lynn*
Yellow Rectangle: ...Lynn?
Lynn Loud Jr.: Whoops, my bad. *rips off bodysuit to reveal Fanbot*
Yellow Rectangle: Fanbot?
Fanbot the Robot: Wrong outfit. *rips off bodysuit to reveal another Yellow*
Yellow Rectangle: *gasps* You're me! Then I must be... *rips off my suit to reveal Patrick*
Patrick Star: Patrick!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Nah, I'm just kidding. *rips off the SpongeBob suit and reveals another Leni*
Leni Loud 2: I’m Leni. *laughs*
Leni Loud: *rips off my bodysuit to reveal other Ashley*
Ashley Roberts 2: Ashley!
Ashley Roberts: *rips off my bodysuit to reveal other Red*
Red Rectangle 2: I am Red!
Red Rectangle: *rips off my bodysuit to reveal other Lincoln*
Lincoln Loud 2: Lincoln Loud!
Lincoln Loud: *rips off my bodysuit to reveal other Yellow*
Yellow Rectangle: Good one, Lincoln!
SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star, Yellow, Red Rectangle, Lincoln, Leni Loud and Ashley Roberts: *laughs*
SpongeBob SquarePants: There's just one thing I don't understand.
Mr. Krabs: What's that, laddie?
SpongeBob SquarePants: That. *points to two Lenis*
Leni Loud and Leni Loud 2: *laughs*
Screen fades in black and it says "THE END". Episode ends.
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