Matt Impossibly Ranks Every RP Character Ever

Here we goooooooo
# RickSanchez, as portrayed by Toadgamer80 (3rd place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- A superbly accurate and funny rendition of one of the main characters from one of my favorite shows, Rick was sure to garner my love. He was full of funny references to Rick and Morty, he had a great dynamic with MrE's Morty, and he went deep in the game partially due to mine own interference. He was cut down in typical "best character loses at final 3" fashion, but he left a real impact on the game. Perhaps the most amazing thing about him was how well Toad captured Rick's exact way of speaking. It was eerie. He perfectly captured Rick's disregard for everyone else and his chaotic sort of intelligence. I could very well imagine everything he said being said in Rick's voice.
# JacobSartorius, as portrayed by Owenandheatherfan (4th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- O did a wonderful job taking a public figure whom I despise and resent greatly and turning it into a very funny character. One would expect someone with a persona like Sartorius' to produce a cringe-worthy character played by a lesser user, but when done by O it was funny and eerily accurate to the kinds of shit Jacob Sartorius writes in real life. Combine that with being a major strategic force in the season, and slight negative points for having organized my ouster, Jacob was a very good character.
# LJMcKanas, as portrayed by EnTrey (9th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- One of the stupider jokes I've gone with for a character, I started the rp off a bit shakily, using my "where's the vagina?" punchline before the first elimination. However, I made up for it with the introduction of Chestnut the non-existent horse, and my constant attraction to her and other horses. This character was basically meant to drag LJ after what he said about Zeke, and I think I accomplished that, while also being a surprisingly integral part of the strategic landscape of my season and ending up as first juror. Not an amazing character, but a decent one.
# KatyaShmolovsky, as portrayed by Jaxswim (5th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- I never had any direct interactions with Katya, which honestly makes me sad, cuz she was real funny from a distance. She was a vaguely European girl who strived to be more like the American girls, and her interactions with the other girls and characters like Rick and Dennis were pretty hilarious, despite her relatively low game-impact.
# DennisReynolds, as portrayed by Shadowgeoff (Winner, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- The eventual winner of a crazily strategic season, Dennis was seen by some as an underwhelming victor. However, while he was fairly understated and kind of quiet, I respected SG's very accurate rendition of a character whom I love very much. He definitely did better in alliance chats in pm than he did in main, explaining the ways he manipulates girls and such, and him saving the season from a Karen win (if only barely) also adds some favor for him.
# LionelDahmer, as portrayed by EnTrey (10th place, Epicvivor: Namibia)- Lionel was a pretty loose joke character going in, just being the father of a serial killer who seems like he's in total denial about his son's obvious serial killer tendencies, and occasionally gets phone calls and goes like "WHAT? HE KILLED PEOPLE?". Probably good he got out early, cuz it ensured that he just stayed funny and never really ran out of material. Very good early out joke by me, I'd say.
# Morty, as portrayed by Mister.. E. (8th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- Morty entered the game with the much stronger Rick, and the two had an excellent dynamic. MrE did a pretty good job being true to the character from the TV series, in his meek awkwardness and constant freaking out, and was pretty funny. However, he wad held back by MrE's own trademark laziness, leading to semi-long periods of inactivity and ultimately a relatively early exit. He worked best as a supplement to Rick, and was good for what he was.
# TeddyDuncan, as portrayed by Peppermint Princess (6th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- Teddy is apparently a character from Good Luck Charlie, which I never watched. But from what I saw, she was a pleasantly feisty girl who was aggressive when she needed to and randomly goofy other times. I feel like I'd have enjoyed her more if I knew the references I assume were there, but she served a good role in her season, proving herself the most strategically capable from her side, despite her getting me out.
# Daria, as portrayed by thebiggesttdifan (6th place, Epicvivor: Namibia)- Daria was kind of typical of Dyna characters, being sort of aloof and ramble-y, but it was more accurate to the Daria character than it usually is. I also found it EXTREMELY Daria AND EXTREMELY Dyna that she was the one who ruined Karen's perfect game by not voting for her in the end. She was a cool, low-key presence that was appreciated. Lame she was rocked.
# SarahLacina, as portrayed by ThatEpic (11th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- Sarah was kind of stupid, with her being two jokes recycled over and over: "I'm a cop, so I percieved _______", and "I'm gonna play like a criminal". Because I'm rather dumb, I still found them funny, and she got out early enough that it never grew too tired, so there you go.
# NedaKalantar, as portrayed by Nduke (7th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- Neda was a fairly boring gamebot who would every once in a while try to say something snarky, which would come out humorless. Luckily for Duke, that's super in-character for Neda, and that coupled with her huge strategic impact on the game keeps her out of the dregs of the rankings.
# PinkyDiamond, as portrayed by GhostNoises (5th place, Epicvivor: Namibia)- Pinky was a very similarly confusing, sexual, WC-type character, a partner to the late kelly. However, she was notably better done and funnier than kelly, which I guess is a testament to Dylan. Still, I really don't like... get it. I may only prefer her because she went further than kelly, but hey. She's apparently from the mysterious "bust a groove".
# LordGregory, as portrayed by Ben109 (12th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- A rather underwhelming sort of Ben character, he was just like... rich and fancy. Which was fine, I guess, but ultimately I'd expect something weirder from Ben. It was kinda Ben playing the straight man, which isn't exactly his thing.
# MrsRefrigerator, as portrayed by Reddude (11th place, Epicvivor: Namibia)- At first when I saw her, I was excited to see a Rick and Morty reference (this was before the Rick and Morty of TV Stars: Director's Cut). Overall, however, I was disappointed that she didn't do much, and was ultimately first out because Reddy kinda wanted to get out. At least she threw out some decent references before going out.
# INVivian, as portrayed by Manatee12 (13th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- A character who literally did nothing, and who I'd like to believe was copied from my Fake RPs (and not BBB like that dirty Mexican Bruno told me), INVivian served her purpose PERFECTLY: be invisible, get out first. Well done, well done indeed.
# brian, as portrayed by thebiggesttdifan (10th place, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- I kinda chuckled at some of the things brian said, but he was mostly just Dyna being kinda himself and doing the kind of rambling he usually saves for the end of an rp, just at the beginning. There was no real direction with brian, and Dyna himself hates him, so I'll put him over here.
# kelly, as portrayed by Peppermint Princess (9th place, Epicvivor: Namibia)- I remember spending the whole roleplay having no clue what Kelly was supposed to be, just that she was ranting and raving and was VAGUELY sexual. I was provided with this article of explanation (http://bust-a-groove.wikia.com/wiki/Kelly) but honestly that has only confused me more.
# KarenSmith, as portrayed by Ashley Hikari (Runner-up, TV Stars: Director's Cut)- Just the kind of character that gets under my skin, Ashley portrayed a character from a movie I love, Mean Girls, a character who's just supposed to be a dumb hot girl. Had he played her like that, it would have been fine, maybe even great. However, Ashley consistently tried real hard at strategy, while forgetting about her dumb persona entirely. She'd do things like explain to everyone in alliance chat why they should throw VIP challenges, while calling everyone by their wrong names so that everyone would be like "oh yeah she's dumb". If you're gamebotting, you're not dumb. And calling people the wrong names is a kinda shitty gimmick. Made worse by that she was a vote away from winning.
# SuzetteAmaya, as portrayed by Mister.. E. (7th place, Epicvivor: Namibia)- Suzette was very low-effort, even for MrE. She was originally DanFoley, but then revealed herself to be Suzette in a Dan costume, which I guess was a very fun reveal... But honestly, the whole rp MrE was obviously unhappy with his character, and her only interaction with me was pming me "SAVE SUZETTE" and that was it. I responded and she didn't.
# SeanSpicer, as portrayed by NateNJ13 (8th place, Epicvivor: Namibia)- Another one of Nate's usual political characters, except this one had actual comic potential. However, Nate wasted that, had like four lines that were all just like "#MAGA", and was eventually med-evaced, which makes it all so much worse.