Awesome Rap Battles of Awesomeness 1

The first in my series of rap battles (I plan to start a channel for them soon): Awesome Rap Battles of Awesomeness. For episode one, we have mythical British king King Arthur fighting against the epic hero Beowulf.
==Lyrics==
===Intro===
AWESOME RAP BATTLES OF AWESOMENESS
KING ARTHUR
VS.
BEOWULF
BEGIN
===King Arthur===
Stand back, you fur-wearing barbarian brute!
If you enter the king's house, you'll receive the royal boot!
I'll give you a royal beating and pop you like a cork!
A Swede hammered on mead, screaming "Bork bork bork!"
I'm the Great Bear; you're just a Scandinavian goblin.
You're nothing more than Robert Zemeckis's problem.
While you fall, I'll rise up on Pendragon's wings.
So let's slay the wulf and then long live the king!
===Beowulf===
Do you heorot? It's time for me to reign on your parade!
I'll punch you in the Monmouth and wipe that Grendel off your face!
Stop Dragon behind; at least try to keep pace.
You're a more slippery bitch than the Lady of the Lake!
I'm the Beo-Lone Wulf; I'm a slayer of beasts!
I'll dethrone you and use your Camelot for a feast.
Step aside, you python, here's a new rule to follow!
I'll beat you faster than the velocity of an unladen swallow!
===King Arthur===
Now I like to think of myself as a patient monarch,
But I do not take kindly to that swallow remark.
I'm the kingpin of England, you savage little cur.
Show respect; I'm a king of the highest Excalibur!
You're a peasant in my shadow, so bow down to me, Fenris.
My knights will dominate you; I'll oppress you like Dennis.
Chain your alcoholic ass in the oubliette; get a high-class beating that you won't forget.
So sit down and hail the king, my pet, before you go around making idle threats.
===Beowulf===
My threats are more than Idle and be sure I've got plenty.
Better call Sir Gawain, your knights are green with envy!
You had a baby with your sister, then he did you in!
I'm bring my lot to Camelot; introduce myself to Gwen!
You got your wife stolen from you by your closest knight.
I guess "bros before hoes" tweren't the prophecy that night.
Arthur season's open 'cause I'm Hrunting Your Highness!
En masse, I spit kickass raps of gold like King Midas!
<poll>
Who won: King Arthur or Beowulf?
King Arthur
Beowulf
</poll>
Category:King Arthur
Category:Beowulf
Category:Awesome Rap Battles of Awesomeness