Rowley builds a snow man

30.Rowley Jefferson was known for being a bit on the stupid side. He struggled in school and was always getting into trouble. But despite his shortcomings, one thing Rowley had always been good at was building snowmen. He loved the way the cold, powdery snow felt in his hands and the endless possibilities of what he could create. So, when he woke up one crisp winter morning and saw that it had snowed overnight, he knew exactly what he wanted to do. Rowley got dressed in his warmest clothes, donned his hat and gloves, and rushed outside to begin his snowman building extravaganza. He worked hard, carefully shaping the snow into a round body and a perfectly round head. He even used his dad's inhaler as the nose. It wasn't the best idea, but it was the only thing he could find that was the right shape and size. Next, Rowley collected some horse poo from the field and used it for the snowman's eyes. He also added some sticks for arms and a scarf to keep him warm. But then Rowley heard a rumor that if you pissed on a snowman, it would come to life. Being the curious and mischievous boy that he was, he decided to give it a try. At first, nothing happened. Rowley sat back and waited for the magical transformation to take place. But then, to his horror, the snowman began to stir. Suddenly, it stood up and began to move. Rowley couldn't believe his eyes. He had created a living snowman! The snowman turned to him and said in a deep, booming voice, "Thank you for bringing me to life, Rowley. I have been waiting for someone like you to create me." Rowley was both excited and terrified. He had never heard of anything like this happening before. But the snowman seemed friendly, so he decided to take him on a tour of the town. They wandered through the streets, and as they walked, the snowman grew bigger and bigger. His body expanded to enormous proportions, and he began to devour everything in his path. He ate world leaders like Putin and Elon Musk and even Sid the Kid. Row ley followed the trail of destruction until he found the snowman again. He was horrified to see that the snowman had grown to an enormous size and was no longer the friendly creature he had brought to life.
Terrified, Rowley trembled as the snowman spoke to him again. "You have given me life, Rowley. But now I am hungry. You have created a monster!" Rowley tried to run, but the snowman was too fast. He grabbed him with his massive snow hands and lifted him up to his eyes. "You will be my next meal, Rowley. I am sorry, but it cannot be helped." Suddenly, Rowley remembered the legend that said if you melted a snowman, it would become normal water again. So, with a sudden burst of courage, he took one of the hospital cups from his father's bedside table and threw it of the snowman's eyes, melting him into a pool of water. Looking down at the formerly fearsome creature, Rowley began to cry. But then he realized that he had the water, and he put the cup in the freezer, creating his own personal snowman. From that day on, if anyone wanted an ice cream from Rowley's freezer they had to go through Mr. Snowman. It was his little nod to the creature that he had brought to life and put an end to. Eventually, Rowley threw a big party and one of the guests accidentally drank the snowman. Rowley was distraught - he had lost his most beloved friend. But then, something truly incredible happened. The man who drank the snowman began to transform. His skin turned to a bright, frosty white. His hair became strands of twigs, and his eyes turned into shiny black stones. It was the snowman, back from the dead once again! Only this time, he had taken the form of a man. And from that day on, Rowley and the snowman-man were the best of friends. They ate together, shopped together, and even had a polar bear expedition in the Antarctic. Rowley's mother and father were left in hell, paying for their sins. They were thirsty forever, wondering why they had been so mean to their poor son. But Rowley didn't care. He had his best friend back, and they were going to live happily ever after.