Bart on the Road

"Bart on the Road" is the twentieth episode of Season 7.
==Synopsis==
While stuck with Patty and Selma at the DMV as part of "Go to Work With Your Parents Day" (which Principal Skinner cooked up in order to accommodate his vacation to Hong Kong) Bart creates a fake driver's license that says he's 25 years old, and, with the help of Martin's $600 he got from his father the stockbroker, Bart, Martin, Milhouse, and Nelson go on a road trip. Meanwhile, Lisa and Homer spend time together at the nuclear plant, and Marge must deal with being left alone.
== Full Story ==
It is the last week of school before Spring Break at Springfield Elementary. Principal Skinner is planning on spending the break in Hong Kong. While sitting in his office, he discovers that the airline has mistakenly booked him for a flight that leaves on Friday instead of Saturday. Unable to charge the huge fee that the airline would require to change the flight date on his itinerary, Skinner plans to promote a "Go To Work With Your Parents Day" on the Friday before Spring Break. Bart wants to see women in the workplace, and he reluctantly goes to the DMV with Patty and Selma (his first choice was staying at home with Marge watching cartoons and eating cereal from the box, but, according to the form Marge reads out loud, "homemaker" doesn't count as a real job because it's not real work and women don't get paid for it), Lisa goes to the nuclear power plant with Homer which she doesn't like at first (especially since she has signed many petitions to shut down the plant) but eventually makes the job fun for Homer, Milhouse discovers the exciting world of making crackers with his father, Kirk; and Martin makes a million dollars trading commodity futures (although seconds later, he loses all but $600).
At the DMV, Bart creates a fake driver's license for himself after Selma takes Cletus' picture and foolishly tells Bart to turn off the driver's license machine. He, Nelson and Milhouse try to see an R-rated movie, but are sorely disappointed that the film adaptation of Naked Lunch has, according to Nelson, "...two things wrong with that title". They then try to get some beer at Moe's, but see how alcohol has made losers and slobs out of the regular barflies (Barney, Larry the Lush, and Sam) and leave. The three friends wish they could find something decent to do with Bart's I.D. card. They soon run into Martin who has been on a shopping spree with the money he got from the stock market. He asks to join them, while unenthusiastic at first the trio allows it especially when Martin mentions he has lots of money to spend. They decide to use some money that Martin has to rent a car and go on a road trip. As a cover story, Bart, Martin, Nelson and Milhouse will tell their parents that they have been selected by their school to attend the National Grammar Rodeo at the Sheridan Hotel in Canada. Martin and Milhouse have no problems convincing their parents, while Nelson just tells his mother that he is going away for a week. Marge and Homer are glad to hear Bart's "news" but Lisa, who has never heard of such an event, can easily see through Bart's fib but Marge only thinks that Lisa is trying to get attention. 
The boys drive the car and enjoy the road trip, but drive through a corn field at one point after Bart left the driver's seat briefly. Martin (who was sleeping for much of the trip) still thinks they are going to the Grammar Rodeo but Bart tells him that was an alibi. Seconds later, they stop when they suddenly realize they are not certain of their destination. Finding an old brochure in the glove box of the car, they plan to go to the World's Fair in Knoxville, Tennessee instead of Disney World. They make several stops along the way getting ice cream, checking out roadside attractions and picking up a hitchhiker. They soon take a detour in Branson, Missouri (which according to Homer is like Las Vegas, if it were run by Ned Flanders), where Nelson makes them stop so he can see his hero, Andy Williams, in concert.
Back in Springfield, Homer asks if Lisa would like to come spend her spring break at work with him and she enjoys herself there. She even has a slumber party as Homer has a night shift, they even play Truth or Dare and Lisa says this is the best Spring Break ever. Meanwhile, Marge becomes bored at home since everyone is basically away. She tries to watch informercials late at night, but instead, decides to poke Maggie while she sleeps so she can comfort something. 
After driving all night, the boys arrive in Knoxville, the boys are shocked, finding out that the World's Fair was over 10 years ago (the Knoxville World's Fair was held in 1982, nearly 14 years before the episode originally aired) and the aging Sunsphere has been turned into the Wigsphere (a wig shop). Despite the group having come a long way for nothing, Bart tries to be optimistic and points out that they still have a car and a lot of money. However, Martin informs the group that they don't have any more money as he spent their last ten dollars on a talking Al Gore doll. Out of extreme anger, Nelson throws a rock at the Sunsphere, which topples it over and destroys their car.
Now without a car, any money and no one else knowing where they really are, the boys are forced to admit that they are stranded in Tennessee. Martin maturely says that they should call their parents. Bart, terrified of the punishment that their parents (specifically his own) would lay upon them convinces everyone to find a way to get home on their own. So, the boys go to a local pawn shop to make money. Nelson grabs Milhouse's glasses and gives them to the register. The register says that they are perfect for rebottling some antique Coke bottles but takes back the money after Milhouse blindly and accidentally knocks down and shatters them. The kids try to catch a train that leads through Springfield, they succeed in tossing their luggage onto the train but fail to get on themselves (after the train outspeeds them, abandoning the gang without any luggage).
With no other options left, Bart calls Lisa and tells her the truth, which confirms her earlier suspicions. She gleefully states he will be in so much trouble when he gets home, however one story from Bart about how he is pretty much already in deep trouble convinces her to help without telling Homer or Marge. She suggests that he become a courier as a possible way to get home (not a terrier, as terriers are dogs). Bart manages to get a job (even with his unlaminated, unsigned license). His first job takes him to Hong Kong to deliver eyeballs, while his friends stay behind (during the trip, Principal Skinner sees Bart at the airport). After finally returning from his first delivery, Bart calls Lisa and tells her that she needs to help him find a method to have a package the large enough to accommodate Martin, Milhouse and Nelson that also has a shipping destination to Springfield. Lisa tells Bart that she's not sure how she could be of any help regarding that issue as such a delivery would cost a small fortune. A frustrated Bart tells Lisa that they're counting on her, before he's ordered by his manager to deliver Big Macs to Marlon Brando's private island.
The following morning, while Lisa is at work with Homer, he notices that she seems troubled by something and asks her what is the problem. Lisa agrees to tell Homer on the condition that he wouldn't tell anyone else (especially Bart) and she explains just what Bart has been up to in rapid-fire succession ("Bart rented a car with a phony driver's license and drove Milhouse, Nelson, and Martin to a wig outlet in Knoxville and the car got crushed and they're out of money and they can't get home and Bart's working as a courier and just came back from Hong Kong"). Homer's face goes a literal red with fury and he vents his displeasure by yelling into the helmet of his hazmat suit to the point that the visor completely fogs up. Homer plans to send Bart the money to get home before murdering him for lying but is unable to otherwise he will spoil Lisa's trust in him by revealing she violated her agreement with Bart not to say anything. After some slight research about the location of Knoxville and learning that it's home to the Oak Ridge Nuclear Facility, Lisa and Homer decide that the best course of action would be to order something from the facility so Bart can act as the courier. Homer calls Oak Ridge, but quickly realizes that he doesn't know what to order, until he looks down at his T-437 console and places an order for a replacement. When the facility informs him that his console is fully operational, Homer purposefully spills Buzz Cola on it causing a malfunction and then finishes the order using a pseudonym to hide his involvement. Bart forces Nelson, Milhouse and Martin to get in the crate while flying home and after talking about his trip to the "Grammar Rodeo" at dinner everyone knows about the trip and glares at him except Marge, who smiles after hearing the story. 
During the closing credits, Marge is in bed and receives three phone calls about Bart's adventures (Principal Skinner calls Marge to confirm if Bart really was in Hong Kong, the Tennessee State Police call Marge to ask about the crushed, abandoned rental car in Knoxville, and the courier company asks Marge if Bart's available tomorrow to deliver a human kidney to Amsterdam). After hanging up, Homer suppresses a chuckle and Marge asks if he's laughing at her.
== Reception ==
This episode was enjoyed by fans and critics alike.
== Citations ==
fr:Faux permis, vrais ennuis
it:Bart girandolone
pl:Bart on the Road
pt:Bart pega a estrada
Category:U-rated episodes
Category:Bart episodes
Category:Milhouse episodes
Category:Nelson episodes
Category:Martin episodes
Category:Travel episodes
Category:Episodes named after a character
Category:Homer episodes
Category:Lisa episodes
Category:Simpson Family Bonding episodes
Category:Principal Skinner episodes
Category:Episodes named after Bart
Category:Episodes with prank phone calls
Category:Episodes about Road Trips
Category:Directed by Swinton O. Scott III
Category:Highly Rated Episodes
Category:Episodes where Maggie cries
Category:Written by Richard Appel
Category:Kids episodes
Category:Adventure episodes