Cliches

Clichés is the sixth substory for Shun Akiyama and the sixth overall in Yakuza: Dead Souls.
== Plot ==
A man in a camouflage jacket calls out to Akiyama while he passes the Kamuro Theater entrance and offers him a safe place to rest within. Inside, the man introduces himself as Kondo. A businessman holding a duffel bag and a stuffed toy bear offers to buy Akiyama's gun so he can leave the quarantine zone in order to see his daughter. Kondo advises Akiyama to stay out of the matter. 
Akiyama checks in with the others seeking refuge within the theater. He first approaches a woman, the Housewife, who believes the zombies are a punishment for mankind's sins but decides to ignore her due to the look in her eyes. A couple are sat nearby; the Boyfriend smokes and tells Akiyama about the people they saw dying, while the Girlfriend wonders aloud about being rescued by the police or Self-Defence Force. When he speaks to the Businessman again, he is given a new offer: keep possession of the gun in order to escort the Businessman to safety. He declines. 
Akiyama speaks to Kondo again, who notes how the survivors are like horror movie clichés: the horny couple, the woman prophesying the end of days, and the suit who thinks he can buy his way out of anything. He claims that his knowledge of horror movies allows him to determine who will get themselves killed first. As he ponders whom, everyone is startled by the appearance of a... zombie? 
It is a human survivor, trying to make light of the situation. Disgusted, the couple relocate to the next room for privacy. Kondo suggests the "Zombie" will be the first to die. Akiyama and Kondo hear growls, thinking the "Zombie" is up to no good again, but it turns out that there are three actual zombies behind him. Akiyama swiftly deals with them. The "Zombie" gives him a Tauriner Maximum for saving him. 
Kondo suggests the couple in the other room being next. Akiyama and Kondo sneak a peek from behind the door. To their surprise and lewd fascination, things are getting hot and heavy. The Girlfriend describes her boyfriend's lovemaking prowess as like he has an extra pair of hands. The Boyfriend is confused and stops to look around. There are three zombies in front of them! Kondo laughs at his prediction coming true and Akiyama deals with the zombies. As thanks for saving their lives the Boyfriend gives Akiyama a Staminan Royale. 
Having witnessed Akiyama handling the zombies, the Businessman pleads with him to get him to safety, offering him the bag of money. The "Zombie" runs in and tells everyone the Housewife opened the door, allowing a group of zombies inside. In the other room the housewife is kneeling in front of the zombies, praying for forgiveness. Akiyama quickly kills them. The Housewife thinks her soul has been spared and Akiyama is the hand of the Lord. She gives him some Super Hard Aluminum Alloy. 
The Businessman draws Akiyama's attention to the window. While Akiyama was dealing with the zombies, Kondo took advantage of the confusion to leave the theater with the Businessman's bag of money. As Kondo strolls away from the theater he slips on something and falls to the ground, injuring his leg. A banana peel - about as clichéd as it gets. Zombies close in on Kondo and finish him off. 
Back in the theater, the Businessman, Housewife, and "Zombie" each comment on Kondo. Akiyama laughs at how Kondo's knowledge of clichés did not help him after all and leaves the theater.
Category:Yakuza: Dead Souls Substories