Privates

Privates: Ex Marks the Spot was the first miniseries of It's All Been Done Radio Hour. It is a spoof of noir detective stories, with rapid-fire puns, double entendre, and other wordplay. It premiered in September 2018 and ran through April 2019.
Installments aired in mostly-consecutive months and make up one complete story, told in chapters. It's running time was between five and ten minutes per segment, longer than a typical Radio Hour commercial, but shorter than a normal segment. The miniseries was named retroactively, at the end of the run. The lead character was Jake Cotton, and his mission was to find the missing leopard of his ex-girlfriend, Dame Judy Bench.
It isn't clear where the story takes place, except it is most likely somewhere on the east coast, and not in too big a city. Also, while the style indicates a period piece, references contradict this and set the story in the present day, and it is definitely set in the 21st century.
Kristin Green composed and performed the music that runs over Jake's monologues.
Due to the reception of the first run, in December 2019, a second miniseries of more typical-length episodes began.
== Characters ==
see: list of Privates characters.
=== Main Characters ===
* Jake Cotton played by Keith Jackson. Jake is dedicated to the job, and has a weakness for certain women, especially Judy. He knows he shouldn't still hold a torch for her, but he can't help himself, even though he dumped her.
* Frank Berry played by Shane Stefanchik (season 2; recurring season 1). The ex-boyfriend of Cordelia Bench, Frank is a scam artist who seems to like Jake, though Jake detests Frank.
* Dame Judy Bench played by Kristin Green (season 2; recurring season 1). Jake's ex-girlfriend and a woman of wealth, as is her whole family. She has a pet leopard and a hard time letting go of Jake, who didn't defer to her like other men have.
*Wayne Bench played by Chase McCants (season 3; guest season 2). Judy's father and Cordelia's ex, who runs a powerful mob.
*Mary-Louise Gardner played by Megan Overholt (season 3; guest season 2). An F.B.I. agent who partners with Jake to take down Wayne.
=== Recurring Characters ===
* Dame Cordelia Bench played by Samantha Stark. Judy's rich, eccentric mother.
== Episodes ==
see: list of Privates episodes.
Privates: Ex Marks the Spot was a miniseries that served as the first season of the segment. It was made up of six episodes that were less than ten minutes each, shorter than most segments in the show. It ran from September 2018 through April 2019, taking December and February off.
Season Two began in December 2019 and kicked off a new case. The resolution of that mystery led right into Season Three, which began in April 2023.
Privates Seasons 1 & 2 Script Book was published in December 2021.
== Other Works ==
A short story entitled "Making a Meal" was released as part of the It's All Been Written 2019 Collection following that short story contest. It was set prior to the scripts series.
In December 2021, Privates Seasons 1 & 2 Script Book was released. It included all 13 episodes of the first two seasons and the "Making a Meal" short story. It is available in ebook, paperback, and hardcover, and is the first Radio Hour script book to feature a performer on its front cover.
== Trivia ==
* The subtitle "Ex Marks the Spot" was added retroactively, at the end of the miniseries, once it was clear there would be additional stories.
Category:Segment