Toxic Waste and Barnacles

Toxic Waste and Barnacles is the first episode of The Life And Times Of Mr. Rrarrg!. In this episode, patrick and rrarrg try and find more barnacles and toxic waste to make some friends for rrarrg. 
===Characters:===
• Patrick (debut)
• Rrarrg (debut)
• Barnacle Monsters (debut)
• Mayor of bikini bottom (debut)
• Fred (debut)
• Mr Krabs (debut)
== Transcript ==
(We see Rrarrg at his cave in the mountains)
(a truck drives by that says "Star Industries")
Rrarrg: Rrararararararararg. (Translation: Cool, a truck.)
(we see a leg come out of the truck)
(it turns out to be patrick in a lab coat)
Rrarrg: Rarrarg? (patrick?)
Patrick: G’morning, Rrarrg.
Rrarrg: rarrarrg rrarrarrarrg? (what are you doing here patrick?)
Patrick: Well, since my company has been banned in Bikini Bottom I decided to move up here to continue my experiments.
Rrarrg: rrarrarrg (oh. but how?)
Patrick: uhhh...
(flashback start)
Mayor of Bikini Bottom: From here on, star industries is BANNED from bikini bottom for using illegal chemicals for experiments and causing 200 deaths per week.
The townspeople: *cheering*
(flashback end)
Patrick: It's a long story.
Rrarrg: rrarrg (huh.)
Patrick: So, feeling lonely?
Rrarrg: rrarr (yeah)
Patrick: hmm.. oh! I know! How about I make you some friends?
Rrarrg: rrarrarrg? (you will?)
Patrick: Of course I will. Anything for my old buddy! but first we will need the ingredients.
Rrarrg: rrarrg? (ingredients?)
Patrick: uh… yeah…
Rrarrg: rrarrg, rrarrarrg? (well, what are they?)
Patrick: Well, luckily there isn't a lot. Just need some barnacles and some toxic waste.
Rrarrg: rrarrg. (huh.)
Patrick: Yeah it's shocking to find out you're made of barnacles huh?
Rrarrg: rrarrarrg. (biggest shock of my life.)
(rrarrg's phone rings)
(rrarrg picks up the phone)
Mr krabs: rrarrg! We need ice cubes! the ice machine is-
Rrarrg: rrarrarrg rrarrarrg rrarrg rrarrarrg (I can't today mr krabs, me and patrick are gonna go get some special ingredients)
(cut to the krusty krab where people are complaining about not having ice cubes)
Mr. Krabs: WHAT? PEOPLE ARE GETTING MAD OVER ICE CU-
(cut back to the mountains; rrarrg hangs up the phone)
Patrick: Mr. Krabs huh? Ignore that guy, he’s just a party pooper.
Rrarrg: rrarrg (agree)
(bubble transition to the two of them now out of the mountains)
Patrick: Alright, so we just gotta look for anything that looks like toxic waste or barnacles, got it?
Rrarrg: rrarrarrg (got it)
Patrick: Ooh, I think I found some! (he looks) Oh never mind, they’re just rocks.
(Rrarrg groans)
Patrick: (points at something which looks a lot like what a toxic waste barrel that's covered in barnacles would look like) How about this?
Rrarrg: raraaraarrg (Sure why not?)
(As Patrick approaches the thing, it turns into a bunch of sea spiders)
Patrick: Eek! Sea Spiders! 
(Patrick immediately has a stroke and fucking dies)
Rrarrg: rrarrarrg? (patrick)
Patrick: I’m fine.
(the sea spiders crawl away from what is actually a tree trunk)
Patrick: Darn. Stumped by the tree trunk.
Rrarrg: (laughs)
Patrick: Okay enough fooling around. I promised you friends, and you’re gonna get friends!
Rrarrg: rrarrarrg! (alright!)
(bubble transition to the kelp forest)
Patrick: Ah the kelp forest. Surely there’s some toxic waste lying around here somewhere.
(Suddenly, a mysterious figure comes out of the forest and captures the two of them. Cut to the two of them being tied down to chairs in a dark hut)
Mysterious figure: So, y’all want some toxic waste, do ya? Create more of… those freaks of nature?
Patrick: (nodding) Uh-huh! Yeah!
Rrarrg: rrararg! (Hey, I’m not a freak of nature!)
Mysterious figure: What is that thing talking about? It’s not easy to understand gibberish, you know.
Patrick: He said he’s not a freak of nature. You can’t just insult someone like that.
Mysterious figure: Honestly, I don’t care. After seeing the chaos that happened from that thing, I couldn’t bear to live in Bikini Bottom anymore. So, I live here now. And my job is to get rid of all toxic waste in… well everywhere.
Patrick: Sorry to interrupt, but who are you? While I am stupid, I do realise that knowing someone makes conversations easier.
Mysterious figure: I am… (he removes his cloak) FRED!
Patrick: Hey, aren’t you the guy who keeps breaking his leg? Oh by the way, that’s a cool cloak.
Fred: Exactly. He kept stomping on MY LEG! It still hasn’t recovered.
Patrick: Sorry to hear that but I’m sure Rrarrg only did that on accident, ain’t that right buddy?
Rrarrg: rrarg. (Yeah, who is this guy again? He smells like barnacle chips.)
Patrick: Ooh, barnacle chips! My favorite!
Fred: Now’s not the time for barnacle chips, we need to make sure this episode reaches its conclusion!
Patrick: Oh cool, so can you just give us some barnacles and toxi-
Fred: HA! You thought I was actually gonna do that? Fat chance. I got rid of it all. 101% positive.
Patrick: Better not be a corny virus or whatever.
(Off-screen a tear in the hut is heard, and Rrarrg has escaped)
Patrick: JAILBREAK!
Fred: (surprised) Huh, I should have expected this really. No time to dwell on that though, I have a freak to catch!
(Fred starts running after Rrarg, and Patrick follows. A chase scene then starts)
Patrick: Go find that toxic waste, buddy!
Fred: Don’t find that toxic waste, buddy!
Rrarrg: rrarrrg. (We were never friends, Fred.)
Fred: I feel like I should be offended by that.
(A stink line appears up ahead, and Rrarrg runs towards it)
Fred: NO! Humanity is doomed!
Patrick: None of us are even humans.
Fred: Oh right. Fishmanity is doomed! That better?
(Rrarrg comes back to Patrick with three barrels of toxic waste and a bunch of barnacles)
Fred: I thought I checked that place yesterday.
Granite (one of the writers): (pops up from off-screen) I would make a joke about the iconic 1965 Beatles song called Yesterday, but I think I’ll save that for another time. (goes back off-screen)
Patrick: Who was that weird guy?
Fred: That doesn’t matter. (looks at Rrarrg) Give that back, freak!
Rrarrg: Rraaarg! (Patrick, catch!) (he throws the ingredients towards Patrick, who doesn’t catch them in time)
Fred: I got you now!
(Fred tries to grab the ingredients, but slips on the toxic waste)
Fred: MY BUTT!
Patrick: What about your leg? Eh, who cares?
(Rrarrg picks the ingredients back up, and gestures for Patrick to hop on his back. He hops on his back, and Rrarrg runs out of the forest)
Fred: I lost. I lost to the freak of nature. MY SOUL!
(Cut to Rrarrg and Patrick back in the cave, preparing the ingredients)
Patrick: Ready?
Rrarrg: (gives a thumbs up)
(Patrick dumps the toxic waste on the barnacles, and it slowly starts to form new creatures)
Patrick: It’s happening! It’s happening!
(Eventually, three new creatures that look similar to Rrarrg are created)
Patrick: Well, would you look at that? Three new friends to play with!
Rrarrg: rraaarrrrrg! (Yippee! Nice to meet you guys!)
Creature 1: gruugrgrgrug. (Why do I exist?)
Creature 2: babababababa (Uh, hi.)
Creature 3: grgrgrgrgrgrgrgrr (I hate all of you.)
Patrick: All’s well that ends well, I guess.
(Rrarrg’s phone rings again, and he answers it)
Mr. Krabs: WHERE ARE ME ICE CUBES? The Krusty Krab’s going berserk without them!
Rrarrg: Rrarrrg. (Sorry, busy.) (he hangs up the phone)
Patrick: Now, who wants to play Barnacle Ball?
(All four of them raise their hands)
Patrick: (looks at the viewer) Don’t bother trying to join in viewers, the credits are about to roll.
(credits roll, episode ends)
==Trivia==
• This is the first episode of the show.
• Granite, who came up with the show's name, also came up with the title of the episode.
• Existant did only a little writing, and most of his writing is in the first few scenes.
• The first line of text in the episode is 4 days old.
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