Transcripts 2001-01

Transcripts from January 2001 strips.
==January 5==
Panel 1Anne is in the bathroom wearing a green shirt that comes past her crotch and is standing on a scale, looking down at it. There is a pink towel on a rack and a mirror on the wall under a light fixture.Panel 2Richard is at the kitchen table sleepily lying on one arm with his eyes closed. Kingston is holding a mug and looking at him with concern. A window with a silhouette of a house? and a counter are in the background.Caption: Meanwhile:Kingston: Jesus Richard! You look like death! What happened to you?Panel 3Close-up of Richard still lying on his arm but now looking toward Kingston.Anne has read somewhere that sex is a good way to burn off calories. Guess who she's working off the half stone she put on over Christmas on! And because I can't say no to her she's been screwing me all weekend!Panel 4Richard is crying with a "SOB" into the arm resting on the table, with his other hand on his head. Kingston is looking upward in the direction of Anne. The window and counter from panel 2 have vanished.Off-panel (Anne): ♥ Oh Richard... ♥ Be a love and come up here for a little while. Come on I've only got two pounds to go, It'll be fun...
==January 8==
Panel 1Kingston, Anne, and Richard are sitting on the couch. Kingston is talking and gesturing with one hand while resting his face on the other, leaning against the arm rest. Anne is looking at him, but Richard is staring forward, unamused, with his arms behind the couch and one foot on his other knee. Richard is wearing a shirt with an evil-looking spiky-toothed smiley face.Kingston: You know with the new millennium and all I've been thinking. According 60's sci-fi films we should be going around in flying cars and shit. But it all turned out different. You still can't hold a conversation with a computer but now they don't fill a room.Panel 2Close-up of Kingston, still talking but doesn't have his face in his hand.Kingston: I wonder if we'll really get those holo decks in Star Trek or if entertainment in the future is completely different.Panel 3Futuristic setting in an undisclosed location, probably on the E11. Tin-Head and Sticks are arguing with each other while Tessa looks on, annoyed. The three are on the floor around a board game; Tin-Head has his legs in front of him, Sticks is in a half lotus position, and Tessa is lying on her side with her knees forward. A window with a view of a planet (Uranus?) in the distance and a small plant are visible in the background.Caption: Meanwhile, in the future...Tessa (thinking): I wonder if you could program these two not to fight over who's the car, every time we play monopoly.
==January 12==
Panel 1External shot of the E11. Note: For this storyline, header now says "S.S.D.F" instead of "S.S.D.D."Caption: Space station E11 in a high orbit above Uranus. Sometime in the future.Intercom (Adams): Commander Adams here with some fantastic news for you all...Panel 2Tin-Head and Tessa (in uniform but covered by a word balloon) look up at the intercom on the wall.Tin-Head: Why do I always want to run and hide every time he says that?Intercom (Adams): we've got a big commission from May-Tec to perform experiments here. Isn't that nice?Panel 3The camera rotates to view Tessa and Tin-Head from the front.Tessa: May-Tec? They build ship engines, so why on earth would they want to use an observation platform way out in the sticks? There's nothing out this far except this lump of shit and that stupid planet! And since when has a government run station get rented to private contractors?Panel 4Same as panel 2 but Tin-Head and Tessa look at each other.Tin-Head: Ah who cares? It means that there will be some new faces around here to torment. Hay maybe you could give all the newcomers a tour of Uranus..Tessa: Huh, one more Uranus joke and you'll be turned into a novelty ashtray!
==January 15==
Panel 1Tessa and Tin-Head look up at an intercom. A panel with a green screen and six buttons, five red and the sixth yellow, is below the intercom. This appears to be a different area from the previous comic.Intercom (Adams?): Would officer Tessa Edwards please report to commander Adams immediately!Panel 2Tessa makes an eyes-shut angry face. The camera views her from 3/4 profile.Tessa: *sigh* Okay Tin-Head, what have YOU done that Adams will shout at ME for?Panel 3Tin-Head and Tessa are walking along a corridor. Tin-Head has his eyes shut and Tessa is pulling the brim of her hat over her face. Two more panels appear in the background, both with arbitrary fiddly bits to look futuristic.Tin-Head: I swear on the ghost of the "Righteous One" himself that I've done nothing lately! Maybe he just wants you to pretend to be a schoolboy and bugger ya!Tessa: You'd have better! If I find you've set all the suction toilets to 'blow' in the zero-G levels again I'll throw you out of the nearest airlock!
==January 19==
Panel 1Tessa peeks around the door frame into Adams's office. She has removed her hat.Tessa: You wanted to see me sir?Off-panel (Adams): Yes Tessa please take a seat.Panel 2Tessa sits at a desk across from Adams, who is looking closely at a device, with a second, folding device laying on the desk.Adams: Yes I wanted to talk to you about your damn robot "Tin-Head"...Tessa: I KNEW IT! What's he done now?Adams: Nothing, well not lately anyway. No I've just received a commination from head office about him.Panel 3Close-up of Adams, face on. He is still looking at the device in his hand.Adams: Apparently our new contractors are "deeply concerned" about the fact that we have an Anarchist built A.I. running freely about he station with most of it's original programming intact.Panel 4Silhouette of panel 2 on an orange background.Adams: 'May-Tec' are demanding that any potential "spies or saboteurs" be neutralised before their arrival at the station. So it look like well have to deactivate Tin-Head.Tessa: Good luck with that! The last guy that tried to turn him off still walks with a limp!
==January 22==
Panel 1Tessa is sitting at Adams's desk, scowling. Adams is in the foreground, the camera viewing him from behind as he holds a device in his hand.Adams: Oh don't you give me that look! I hate taking orders form a bunch of corporate brown-nosers but they obviously have the ear of the top brass as this order came from head office. I'm sorry Tessa but we'll have to shut Tin-Head down!Panel 2Front view close-up of Tessa, gesturing angrily. The shiny door is in the background behind her.Tessa: Yeah but Tin-Head has a volatile neural-net and memory! If you turn him off he'll lose his memory and reboot to his factory settings when you turn him back on! You'll loose the useful informar on the Anarchists and gain a machine that's want's to rip your head off!Panel 3Close-up of Adams, holding up the device in his hand.Adams: True, although annoying Tin-Head is useful. Humm. Maybe I can swing it to have him shut down but keep the neural-net powered. Tell me, why DOES that loader droid have a net anyway? It's not like you need a lot of brains to handle luggage and carry stuff about!Panel 4Two Anarchist loader bots going through packages (off-panel). One is holding up pink panties. Storage shelves are visible in the background.Off-panel (Tessa): Well sir, the Anarchists are rather paranoid about spies and saboteurs so they use machines like Tin-Head to go through luggage or packages. It takes a surprising amount of processing power to find hidden items or notice anything suspicious, then repack as though the package has never been opened. Unless it's an airport, then they'll trash your bags and steal anything valuable to avoid looking out of place.
==January 26==
Panel 1Adams and Tessa sit at his desk, 180-degree rotated view from the prior comics. Adams holds the device in his hand as though handing it to Tessa, who looks at it with concern.Adams: I can't see head office objecting to keep Tin-Head's neural-net powered if we totally dismantle the rest him so he can't cause trouble. On the other hand though, your android might be a problem...Tessa: WHAT! May-Tec's sister company built him for Christ's sake! Why do they think Sticks is a security risk?Adams: They don't...Panel 2Close-up of Adams face on, holding up the device to his face.Adams: There have been a few complaints that people feel uncomfortable around the "synthetic life named Sticks", especially concerning your... er... 'relationship' with the aforementioned android.Panel 3Same as panel 1, but slightly zoomed out. Adams is gesturing with one hand and holding the device in the other. Tessa is crossing her arms in anger. A small folding device is on the desk.Tessa: Yeah and most of them came from the soon-to-be-dead Sanders right? That little prick has had it in for me since I ruined his belief that he's God's gift to women! He can't handle the fact I'd rather sleep with Sticks than with him!Adams: You know I can't tell you who made the complaints but I will tell you to keep away from Dr Sanders! That includes getting Tin-Head to seal his porno collection again!
==January 29==
Panel 1Close-up of Adams in 3/4 profile.Adams: It's not just Sanders who've voiced concern that you're getting too involved with that android Tessa. Adams: Don't take this wrong but you're a good-looking girl and you shouldn't need Sticks at all to keep you... occupied.Panel 2Close-up of Tessa, looking cross and touching her hand to her face as she rolls her eyes.Tessa: If the whole male population of this station weren't your classic nerd or total arse-holes you would have a point! However the only cute guy here would have to be gay!Panel 3Adams smirks at Tessa while holding up the device in his hand. Tessa gives a very large smile in return. A folding device lays on the desk between them.Adams: I can't really argue with you there, but before we continue I would like to warn you that flattery will get you everywhere officer!Tessa: I also like how you've done you hair today sir!
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