Sorry Not Sorry/Transcript

The following is a transcript for the episode "Sorry Not Sorry".
== ==
(At the Bergen Town Castle, Bridget receives a heart-shaped locket with a picture of her, King Gristle Jr. and a pizza.)
Bridget: (gasps) It’s you. And me. And a pizza! The food we ate on the night we fell in love. (King Gristle Jr. puts the locket on her.) Oh, Gristle, it’s too much.
King Gristle Jr.: Uh-uh. Only the best for our one-month-iversary. Which reminds me, I ordered Chad to spend the whole day picking your favorite flowers. (He claps his hands and Chad appears carrying a large basket of roses.)
Bridget: (gasps) Pretty! I mean, technically, daisies are my favorite, but those are totally nice, too.
King Gristle Jr.: Not your favorite? CHAD, YOU FOOL! Destroy those roses and bring milady every daisy in town! (Chad grunts and sighs as he walks away.)
Bridget: Uh... Gristle, you were kind of harsh to Chad. You made his face go all… (She grunts like she is disgusted.)
King Gristle Jr.: I did? But only ‘cause I want to make today special. And my daddy always said a king should get what he wants. (He shows paintings of the old kings of Bergen Town.) Just like he did, and his daddy before him.
Bridget: Yeah, Gristle, you do realize that’s kind of a horrible view on life, right?
King Gristle Jr.: Eh, potato, potato. Now, are you ready for a date you’ll never forget?
Bridget: Well… duh. Of course I am. (She kneels down on the ground.) Why do you think I stayed up all night making these? (She shows King Gristle Jr. mint-green jumpsuits. He gasps in amazement.) Mint-green his-and-hers jumpsuits, hand-sewn by yours truly. One thread for every beat of my heart.
King Gristle Jr.: Sugar cereal! Bridget, this gift just proves how in sync we are.
Bridget: Really?
King Gristle Jr.: Yeah, ‘cause last night, I had Todd make jumpsuits, too. (He tosses the mint-green jumpsuits on his throne and picks up light yellow jumpsuits with purple and light blue diamonds.)
Bridget: (Taking one of the jumpsuits) “Even better”? But I-I worked hard on these.
King Gristle Jr.: Oh, I know. But these are really nice. And tonight we should look our really nicest. You’re welcome. (Bridget becomes upset and groans.) Uh, schmoopy? Your mouth went down when it should’ve gone up. (He tries to force a smile on Bridget, but she frowns again. He tries it again with the same result. Then she becomes angry and runs away.) Bridget? Was it something you said? (His alligator growls. Bridget sobs as she runs to the ladies’ room and he runs after her.) Sweetie, wait, hold on. (As soon as Bridget reaches the bathroom, she closes the door.) Huh? Um, Bridget, I’m not sure if you know this, but there’s a door between us, so I can’t comfort you.
Bridget: Go away, Gristle! I didn’t come in here to be comforted. I came in here to angry dance. (As she does her angry dance, she looks at herself in the mirror and rolls her eyes. She then slides to the bathroom door, bangs her fists on the door, hits the wall, and takes out toilet paper. Then she rips it into pieces. After that, she sits on the toilet and flushes it.)
King Gristle Jr.: Bridget, are you… mad at me?
Chad: Your Majesty, a Troll infiltrated the castle walls. (He opens his hand to reveal Poppy.) This Troll.
Poppy: (grunts) Hey! Put me down! I’m late to help Bridget get ready for her big date! (She kicks Chad’s ear and he lets her go.) It might be helpful if you fill in your guards on the whole “Trolls and Bergens are friends now” thing.
King Gristle Jr.: (sighs) What does it matter? What does anything matter? The most wonderful girl in the world is mad at me.
Poppy: I’m not mad at-oh, Bridget. Wait, what did you do? (In the ladies’ bathroom, Bridget is banging her fists on the toilet lid while grunting.) Bridge? You okay in there, girlfriend? (Bridget grunts and dances to the door. Then she kneels down.)
Bridget: Poppy? No, girlfriend. Gristle and I have relationship issues, girlfriend.
Poppy: Ooh! Well, lay it on me, girlfriend.
Bridget: I’m just sick of him being so thoughtless, Poppy. (She sighs and sits with her back on the door.) Oh, I know what you must think. “How can she complain? He’s perfect.”
Poppy: Uh…  (She looks at King Gristle Jr. rubbing his tooth.) yeah. But I think I know where you’re coming from.
King Gristle Jr.: So all better now, right?
Poppy: No, you hurt her feelings. Before she forgives you, don’t you think there’s something obvious you need to do first?
King Gristle Jr.: Hm. I do seem to remember my daddy saying a few things about… (He tries slide money through the door, but Bridget burns it. Chad makes lobster for Bridget. King Gristle Jr. tries to put it through the door’s window, but it doesn’t fit and he falls over.) Ah! (He plays a song on a radio and bangs it against the door.)
Poppy: Ah, OK, enough! Gristle, this is absurd. (King Gristle Jr. puts the radio down.) All Bridget really wants is an apology!
King Gristle Jr.: Hm. Sounds familiar. That’s a cake, right? (Poppy groans with annoyance. In Troll Village, she tells her friends about King Gristle Jr.’s problem.)
Poppy: OK. Gristle’s got to learn some basics on how to treat people, so we’re gonna give him some practice apologizing until he’s ready for the real Bridget.
Branch: (In a fake Bridget) For the record, I despise this.
Poppy: Branch! Zip it. Gristle apologizes to Bridget, take one. Action.
King Gristle Jr.: Hey, Bridget, uh, how’s it going?
Poppy: She’s fine. Keep talking!
King Gristle Jr.: Bridget, all I want is for you to not be mad, and as king, I should probably get what I want. The end. (Satin and Chenille use sticks to hit him in the face.)
Branch: What an effective use of our day.
Poppy: Not helping. Gristle, not gonna sugarcoat it. That was awful. Next time, remember to use words like “sorry and “forgive.” OK, take two.
King Gristle Jr.: Bridget, please. I’m so sorry you have yet to forgive me. (Satin and Chenille hit him with the sticks again.) Aah!
Poppy: OK, we need a new approach. (Back at the castle, King Gristle Jr. knocks on the door to the ladies’ bathroom where Bridget is still grunting.)
King Gristle Jr.: Bridget?
Bridget: Go away!
King Gristle Jr.: The last thing I want is for you to be upset with me.
Bridget: Hm?
Branch: (In King Gristle Jr.’s crown) I lost sight of what mattered.
King Gristle Jr.: I lost sight of what mattered.
Branch: And you are the morning sun bringing light to my eyes.
King Gristle Jr.: And you are the morning sun bringing light to my eyes.
Satin: Wow. Branch is smooth.
Poppy: Ugh. I know. But keep it down. It’ll go straight to his head.
Branch: Each moment we’re apart, I feel like I’m missing a piece of myself.
King Gristle Jr.: Each moment we’re apart, I feel like I’m missing a piece of myself.
Branch: Now tell her you’re sorry.
King Gristle Jr.: Bridget, you’re sorry. (Poppy, Branch, Biggie, Guy Diamond, Satin and Chenille gasp.)
Smidge: Oh, my Guh!
King Gristle Jr.: (Imitating Smidge) Oh, my Guh.
Biggie: This isn’t going well, is it?
King Gristle Jr.: (Imitating Biggie) This isn’t going well, is it?
Bridget: Wait, did you just use an accent?
Poppy: No, no. Tell her this is the last time you’ll ever hurt her feelings.
Branch: And that you’re sorry and the only thing in the world you want is for her to forgive you.
King Gristle Jr.: This is the last time I’ll ever hurt your feelings. I’m sorry, and the only thing in the world I want is for her- er, you to forgive me.
Bridget: (Opening the door) Gristle, that’s all I wanted to hear. Apology accepted. (She hugs her boyfriend.) Give me a second to freshen up. Then we can go on our date. (She goes to the door.) If you still want to.
King Gristle Jr.: Hot lunch. You know I do. (Bridget closes the door. The Trolls cheer and King Gristle Jr. puts them down.)
Poppy: Yes! For a minute there, I wasn’t sure that you were gonna pull it off, but I think you learned something here today, Gristle.
King Gristle Jr.: Oh, I did. Thanks to you, Poppy, I learned that after a fight, apologizing is the only way… to get what I want.
Poppy: Wait, what? (The door opens so she and her friends hide behind a vase. Bridget comes out.)
Bridget: All set. (She And King Gristle Jr. hold hands and head off on their date. The Trolls come out of hiding.)
Branch: Okay, I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say Gristle might have taken the wrong lesson from all of this. (He and Poppy run off while Smidge, Guy Diamond, Biggie, Satin and Chenille stay behind the vase. Outside, King Gristle Jr. and Bridget head for Captain Starfunkle’s.)
King Gristle Jr.: My moon.
Bridget: My stars.
King Gristle Jr.: My universe.
Bridget: My… back to moon again.
King Gristle Jr.: Wow. This is gonna be the most romantic night ever. (He bumps into a Bergen.)
Bridget: Oh. (She sees a long line.) Looks like there’s a long wait.
King Gristle Jr.: Not for us, honey bunny. We don’t have to wait on our perfect date, as long as we apologize. (He pushes the Bergens aside.) Sorry. Sorry!
Bridget: Uh, Gristle, you just manhandled that Bergen.
King Gristle Jr.: You’re right. I’m sorry to say. (He pushes more Bergens aside.) Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. (Poppy and Branch from the top of the building.)
Poppy: Oh, no. We’ve created a monster.
Branch: “We”?
Poppy: We’re better as a team. Get used to it. Come on. (She and Branch jump down to a vent and watch King Gristle Jr. and Bridget at their table.)
King Gristle Jr.: (sighs) Isn’t this table delightful?
Bridget: Hold on. Gristle, we need to talk.
King Gristle Jr.: Oh, we will, fuzzy blanket, but first we need our dinner. And what do you know? There’s a pizza right… here. (He trips a waiter with a pizza and it falls onto their table.)
Bridget: Gristle! (The waiter groans in pain.)
King Gristle Jr.: My apologies. (Poppy and Branch watch in disbelief.)
Bridget: I can’t beli- (King Gristle Jr. covers her mouth.)
King Gristle Jr.: Shh, shh, shh. Not yet. For what’s a romantic dinner without music? (He pulls a wire and the jukebox moves over to them.)
Old Bergen: Hey! (The waiter runs to safety.)
King Gristle Jr.: Sorry!
Poppy: Wha-
King Gristle Jr.: Romance is calling. (He turns on the jukebox and shudders.) Drafty. Milady mustn’t be cold. One moment.
Bridget: Gristle- (King Gristle Jr. grabs a tablecloth from another table and wraps it around her. The Bergens at the table growl at him.)
King Gristle Jr.: A thousand pardons.
Poppy: We’ve got to stop him. (She and Branch pull the vent open and jump onto a discoball.)
Both: Yah! (They jump off it. King Gristle Jr. holds up two pairs of rollerskates with one white and blue and the other pink and white.)
King Gristle Jr.: Shall we hit the rink?
Bridget: Hit the rink? After the way you’ve been behaving?
Poppy: Aah!
Branch: Whoa! (He and Poppy land on King Gristle Jr.’s arm.)
Bridget: Poppy? Branch? Are you on a date, too?
Poppy and Branch: Uh…
Poppy: No. Listen, Gristle, I’m sorry. I should’ve been more clear earlier. You can’t just use apologies as an excuse to do whatever you want.
King Gristle Jr.: Why not? Our date’s going great. Now can you go, please? You’re kind of killing the mood. (He throws Poppy and Branch off his shoulder with his finger.) Sorry, Poppy. Sorry, Branch. Now, where were we? (He holds out his hand.)
Bridget: Gristle, those are our friends. I can’t believe- I mean, I’m-I’m just so… Wow, a lot of anger to process. (She starts doing her angry dance again.)
King Gristle Jr.: Bridget, wait! (Bridget runs to the ladies’ bathroom.) No! Please don’t! But I thought that… (Bridget locks the door.) How many locks does this door have?
Bridget: I thought you changed, but you’re even thoughtless-er than before. Just go.
King Gristle Jr.: Again? For how long this time?
Bridget: Forever. (She slides the locket through the door. King Gristle Jr. whimpers, takes it and sits by the door.) I don’t get it. I did your apology thing, but I lost Bridget anyway. You guys got to help me fix this.
Poppy: OK, here’s what we do-
Branch: Nope.
Poppy: “Nope”?
Branch Yeah, that’s right. We can’t fix things with Bridget, Gristle. Only you can. And you better do more than just say you’re sorry. You’ve got to actually show her you mean it. (King Gristle Jr. gets up.)
King Gristle Jr.: I am sorry, Bridget. And I’m gonna show you that I mean it. (He inhales deeply and Bridget opens the door. He places the table cloth back on the table he took it from and brings the Bergens back to it.) Sorry about your tablecloth. Really. (He goes over to the waiter.) And I’m sorry for tripping you. Not cool. (He moves the jukebox back over to the old Bergen.) And hey, I’m sorry I took your song. (The old Bergen takes a bucket of coins he gave her.)
Old Bergen: Hm! (She puts a coin in the jukebox and it plays music.)
Poppy: Wow, Gristle. You might be getting the hang of apologizing after all.
Bridget: I agree.
King Gristle Jr.: (gasps) I’m so sorry, Bridget. I wish I’d been more thoughtful, especially when you wanted me to wear that beautiful jumpsuit you made me. But I can’t change what I did. All I can say is, I’m ready to wear it now. (He tears off his clothes. His buttocks can be seen through his underwear.)
Branch: Ooh! (He covers Poppy with his hair.)
Poppy: Ah…
Branch: Oh. Okay, that’s enough.
King Gristle Jr.: Forgive me?
Bridget: Oh, Gristle, of course I will. Now, can you put your clothes back on? (Later, she and King Gristle Jr. are in their mint-green jumpsuits and roller-skating while Poppy and her friends watch as the song Last Forever plays.)
I just want tonight
To last forever
All right, all right
Tonight let's celebrate
And get together
Uh-huh, uh-huh
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