2012-11-11 Philistines and Lightweights

Home from work and fresh out of the shower, Eddie's in the kitchen right now. Since Thor and Sif went out to do godly things again, Eddie was on his own. And since he wasn't eager to spend a night alone and wanted to relax a little before heading out on a nightly patrol...he called some friends. Now he's making some snacks and waiting for his friends to arrive for some hanging out and then later heading out to kick badguy butt. Dressed in jeans and a Flash-logo t-shirt, he's in a pretty good mood.
Black jeans, a yellow T-shirt, and a pale blue button-down worn open complete Robbie Baldwin's clothes for the evening. Still, he has a jacket on (also black) because it's November and all these giant buildings mean there's a heck of a lot of wind to walk through. It's moments like those, where he feels like his ears are either going to fall off or catch the wind and take him airborne, that he misses suburbia
But, then he realizes where he's going and who he's hanging out with and he decides suburbia's for the birds. He's been given an address, and an apartment number, and he's decided to play it cool and hoof it down to SoHo. The apartment building is entered, and he looks around for a moment or two before heading up the elevator to the apartment he was texted. He puts on his (in his mind) winning grin as he knocks on the door.
Speaking of good moods. Billy Kaplan has been in a great mood, despite nearly wearing himself out to the point of fainting the night before. Why is he in a great mood, because for hte first time in about a week he has ful access to his powers once more. 
With a flash of light and a small crack of thunder he appears in the living room of the apartment home of Thor, Sif and Eddie not long after getting the invite to hang out. Today he is dressed in a crisp white shirt with the Superman S shied on it in black and a pair of well worn jeans. "Hello! Sorry about skipping the door." He calls out not realizing that at the moment he is floating an inch or so above the ground.
Eddie jumps at the sound of the knock, quickly setting down the knife he'd been using in the sink. He jumps again when Billy just appears. "Hey, Billy," he greets. He gives the mage a curious look at the floating but shakes it off. "Be right with you," he chimes, heading over to the door. He pulls it open, smiling when he sees who's on the other side. "Hey, Robbie! C'mon in!"
The smile turns a little more genuine when the door is answered. "Eddie, dude," he says, accepting the offer and coming in, slapping the host jovially on the back as he enters. "Sorry about lately. School came back to me with a vengance, there was a progress report, and Mom brought her foot down." He's relaxed, it seems. "How /are/ you, man? No sign of the Diva around?" Heholds a thumbs-up Billy's way. "Billy, what's up?"
Billy Kaplan grins and waves back. He can't help but beam a little he is in just too good a mood. "Heh, Don't worry Eddie." when Robbie is let in he gives him a wave as well. "Hey Robbie, how are you doing?" He returns the thumbs up at Robbie. "I know how that goes." School and parents, not neccissarily anything with grade. "I am great, after the last week I am so glad to be back in normal shape...well almost normal shape."
Eddie Resilver thankfully has the door to hold onto so he doesn't stumble from the slap. He closes it behind Robbie and then turns to lead the way back into the living area. "Its okay. I've b-b-been busy too. I got a job," he remarks. "I'm alright. But I haven't seen her," he replies. Billy just gets that slightly worried look again at 'almost normal'.
"A job? Dude, that rocks. What kind of job? What can you get us for free?" Robbie winks at Eddie when he asks that; he's joking. Probably. "I want to get out of gym, with certain things. Playing some sports when they have some impact is not gonna go well for the secret identity." One dodgeball in the face and Robbie's secret will be out. Billy's comment about how he spent his week gets a curious look. "Almost normal shape?" He walks over to Billy and looks at him from the side. "I'm seeing...regular? And they call me toothpick..."
Billy Kaplan sees the worried look on Eddie's face and waves a hand ina dismissive manner. "Still a little weak int he power area and the rocky bits are just down to a palm print now. Stop worring, I have told you that I have had people that know what they are doing check me out and that I will be fine." Billy laughs a little at Robbie as he talks about getin away from gym. "I know how you feel about Gym, lucky I figured out ways to avoid most of it even before getting powers. can just see what would happent he first time I got hit with a dodge ball and it blows up, or I end up with a focefield around myself not thinking..." He shakes his head. "Was in a fight last weekened with an army form another reality. Kind of burnt out my powers....and got half my arm trned to stone." He rolls up his sleave and shows Robbie a palm sized spot on his left forearm that is still stone.
"I'll stop worrying when your powers are back to not weak and there are no rocky bits at all," Eddie replies, frowning. The frown only deepens when he sees the palm print. "I'm glad there's no gym class at the place Hawkeye showed me. I h-h-hated gym," he says. "And um...I w-work at the coffee shop right across the street from here. I think I can get you a small coffee if you want one," he replies, not thinking his friend is joking. "And um, speaking of drinks...can I get you guys anything?"
Coffee. And /free/ coffee at that. "Maybe some day, Ed-man," Robbie says. "But a drink? Got any water? I've been considering reducing my sugar intake." Considering what Robbie's like, it might be a good idea. "And you're going back to school? Aw, man, that's awesome news!" He seems genuinely happy for his friend, there. "Well, school's kind of a drag, but...well, I think it'll be good for you and all?" He pauses as he moves, going over the words in his head to see if he said it right. Billy's arm gets a test, as Robbie taps the stone spot with a fingernail. Yep, it's rock. "Army from another dimension? You didn't just try a 'I want to get stoned, I want to get stoned' spell and have it go horribly wrong? He flashes a wicked grin. "Next time, ask. I might be able to figure something out."
Billy Kaplan sighs and shakes his head at Eddie. "Worse things have happened to people than getting partialy turned to stone and loosing power for a few days. Besides, I can fly I can port, helped you kick butt last night and you didn't even use powers at all in the fight." Robbie gets a blank look a few blinks and then a grimice. "Dude, way bad joke. Besides, Mom ever finds out I ever got stoned.." Billy shudders at the thought. It would be worse than the sex talk with ehr and his Dad. "I'd rather face Doctor Doom, The Enchantress, and an interview with 'Glorious' Godfry before facing that."
Nodding, Eddie starts for the kitchen to get some water. He comes back a few moments later with three glasses of water and three small shot glasses of Asgardian Mead for them. Apparently he's just giving in and doing like Sif and Thor do. "Well um, its not really school. Just this...program for kids that used to b-be homeless or still are to get GEDs," he explains. "I'm...I figured it w-would be good," and a superhero reccomended it. Robbie's joke just gets a shocked look from Eddie but he shakes it off. "Just b-b-because its not worse doesn't mean I can't be worried about you," he remarks to Billy simply. He scurries off to get the snacks, just a bunch of cut up fruit for everyone.
Holding up a hand, noting the look on the faces of the others. "Kidding! Kidding!" he replies, backing away a step or two. "Dude, Godfrey, that guy gives me the creeps. It's those eyebrows. It's like the eyebrows are aliens controlling him like a meat puppet. Like that guy on that other show." he shakes his head, putting thr thought out of his head as he reaches for the water. He takes the water, then eyes the shot glasses, then back to Eddie, then back to the shot glasses. "You all confuse the hell out of me, you know that?"
Billy Kaplan shrugs, "A school by any other name, and it is great your going for it." He refrains from commenting on injuries Eddie has had in the past, or his scars but the thought crosses his mind. Billy just does not like being worried about, he is a worrier not one to let other worry. "Wen the Eternaly surprised said that wisdom begains where confusion ends."
"There's only so m-much sitting around here and patrol I can do during the day too..." Eddie trails off. "Godfrey's a jerk," he says, frowning. THe look from Robbie just makes him blink. "What?" he tilts his head to the side. "Oh that's um...well, Sif and Thor always offer it and usually give us little glasses even if we get something else too so um..." he shrugs.
Tilting his head Billy's way, Robbie gives a look of utter cluelessness. "Who's Wen the Eternally Surprised?" Guess who hasn't read Pratchett. The looks between Billy and Eddie, though, make him calm down a little. This whole having friends thing is sometimes a little weird for him. His eyes slide back towards the glasses. "Okay...but what /is/ it?"
Billy Kaplan nods at Eddie. "the eyebrows are not so bad, it's his voice that throws me. Guy sounds like Tim Curry only a lot creepier." He looks at the offere dalcohol and shrugs before drinking a little of the water. "I am surrounded by philistines. It's a Discworld refference." Billy shakes his head and then jsut grins at Robbie. "Asgardian mead. Good stuff, but dangerously powerful."
"Discwhat? And we're what?" Eddie just looks lost. He downs his shot quickly, not even having filled up the glasses all the way. He nods to what Billy says. "Really powerful," he admits, cheeks turning red. "That Godfrey guy probably gets along great with Mr. Jameson from the Daily Bugle."
"Philistines," Robbie says, turning to Eddie. "He's saying we're uncultured, ignorant, and uncouth." The one time he was awake in English class... He takes one of the shot glasses in his free hand. The look on his face says 'really powerful? Yeah right.' Beer's probably a soft drink in Asgard, and Robbie does not realize this. Yet. "Nah, not Jameson. The eyebrow ailens and the freaky moustache aliens have been at war for centuries. Cheers," he says, and tosses back the shot. He swallows, and he looks normal for about two seconds before his eyes bug out and he starts coughing.
Billy Kaplan sighs dramaticaly and pretty much throws hismelf onto the sofa in the room. "None of whiche the Philistines actually were, they had a deep sense of culture and manners and frankly amazing art but had no appreciation for any of that from other cultures so tended to compleatly ignore or destroy art and culture not theirs." Billy waits while Robbie downs his shot and is counting down on his fingers from thee till...boom it hits Robbie. "Discworld, it's a fantasy book series. Kind ofl ike a mix of Tolkeen and Douglas Adams only funnier. And I wouldn't bet on that Eddie. Two of them in one room the jerk paradox would come into effect."
Eddie winces at Robbie's reaction, reaching over to pat his back a bit. "Are you okay?" he asks, smiling a bit. The mention of the alien war just gets another lost look before Eddie snickers a little. "Oh...so that's another series of books I should try to read then, Billy?" he asks, making a mental note already. "Wait...jerk paradox?"
His cheeks are puffed out as his back is patted, as Robbie works through his coughing fit. When he finally comes up for air, his cheeks are red and his eyes are a little wet. "Smooth," he says, nodding. Nodding is fun, he finds. "Jerk paradox? I bet s'like when there's too many asses in a room, and pow, things explode. They should add that British guy from that show with the music, to make it worse." Sadly, that doesn't narrow down who exactly Robbie means. He nods again. "Books are cool," he says, and wanders over to a free armchair. He puts down the glass of water before sitting on the armchair. It's not so much 'sitting' as 'losing solidity in his bones and flopping.'
Billy Kaplan nods at Eddie. "It's one of my favorites, and not quite as hard to read as as lord of the Rings tends to be. If you want i can loan you a few of them." He smiles at the question. "thats pretty much it Robbie. The Jerk Paradox, also known as the Butt head paradox and...a few other versions of that. It's basicaly where you get two jerks in the same room that on paper should be friends and get along because they are exactly the same kind of jerk but they end up hating each other because...well they are both jerks. The funny part of it is, they will both be able to tell you exactly why the other is a jerk but erfuse to see that they act the same way."
Settling onto the couch as well, Eddie snags some of the fruit from the bowl on the table and nods. "That sounds great, Billy. Thanks," he chimes. The booster blinks as the jerk paradox is explained. "Wow...I wonder how supervillains ever work together then."
"So they're like m'parents," Robbie says off-handedly, before sinking into this really, really comfortable chair. His smile is a touch lazy. "Maybe, dude...that's why they lose? Everyone wants what they want, and they keep-" he slams his palms together, "-butt heads. Or hands."
Billy Kaplan sips his water then leans forward and grabs a handful of grapes so he can eat a few. "Because the ones that team up are usually not the same kinds of jerks. You only ever see one of the big name mastermind kinds working in any villian group with everyone else working as lackies for them."
Eddie turns a concerned look Robbie's way at the off-hand comment. "What, Robbie?" he asks, glancing Billy's way a moment. "And they j-just lose because bad guys will always get beat by the heroes," he says with a nod. "So the jerk paradox only works with copies and not just jerks in general."
Shaking his head, Robbie waves it off. "Nothin', really," he says. He props up an elbow on the arm of his chair, resting his chin in his hand. "Well, yeah. If it worked with jerks in general, there'd never be any high school football teams in like, ever." He closes his eyes for a moment, just savoring the environment.
Billy Kaplan nods at Eddie. "A big part of the paradox is that they are too much alike. It works with heroes too sometimes. It's why you hardly ever see Tony Stark working with Reed Richards or other super scientists. Too many big brains with big egos, if there is not some dire threat to all thigns on the horizen then they get more competative than cooperative." Billy eats a few more grapes out of his hand while laying back and grins. "And Villians loose because they are usually lazy and stupid. I mean if you have super strength and durability you could make a killing as a one man wrecking crew taking otu old buildings, or as a teleporter could make seriosu cash transporting things, not to mention what most of the ones that make gadgets or super chemicals could do just patenting them and selling off the rights...."
"Football teams aren't always all jerks...just...mostly," Eddie replies. He nods along to what Billy says, head tilting to the side. "I read a comic like that once and the b-bad guys that didn't do smart stuff went after the ones that did for revenge or something..."
It's nice, just listening to folks talking. Robbie doesn't know about the comic Eddie means, though he finds himself nodding with Billy's suggestions about what could be done with powers. For Baldwin, it just feels...nice. His breathing slows, and his head droops a little as the boy proves holding his liquor is not in his powerset. He's fallen asleep.
Billy Kaplan nods at Eddie. "Yeah, that would be the problem. There are always people that don't want to do any work and turn to crime. But really, if they were any smart then instead of robbing banks they would turn themselves into the next Lex Luthor or Bruce Wayne. "
(Fade out)
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