Sideburned in Space

The Commander grows some sideburns and combs them with his magic sideburn comb. OR DOES HE?
== Transcript ==
(open to Space Tree, wearing sunglasses and a red bandana, listening to music on a hover radio. Commander leaps in, with sideburns. Space Tree doesn't notice, so Commander stops the music, and blows the radio offscreen with the staple gun)
COMMANDER: Top of the morning to ya, Space-a-ta-ree!
SPACE TREE: (his sunglasses are gone, and his bandana has changed to blue) Well, if it isn't my old friend, Commander- wait a minute, what the space are those attached to your face?!
COMMANDER: Well, it looks like you're noticing my new sideburns, brotha!
SPACE TREE: (his bandana is now purple, and he has his gold $ necklace on) Sideburns?! What the heck are they? They sound kind of painful!
COMMANDER: Well, it all started two days ago, when I found this magic sideburn comb. (he holds it up, it gives off a golden glow) I was casually floating through a black arear of space, when suddenly-
(doorbell rings)
SPACE TREE: (he now has his sunglasses on again, with a purple bandana at the top of his trunk, and an orange one at the bottom) Oh, hold on a second. I better go get that.
COMMANDER: Just leave it; I'm tryin' to tell a story here.
SPACE TREE: Well, I'm expecting a package to arrive, so, y'know, this might be it.
COMMANDER: FINE. But hurry back.
SPACE TREE: All right.
(Space Tree leaves; the Commander starts combing his sideburns; the Candy Cane drops in, and the two do the Space Dance)
SPACE TREE: (offscreen) Is this who I think I think it is?
HAIRY GUY: (offscreen) No, I'm lookin' for the Commander.
SPACE TREE: (offscreen) Oh. Come in, he's right in here.
HAIRY GUY: (offscreen) Thank you.
(the candy cane disappears, and a Hairy guy stomps in next to the Commander)
COMMANDER: Who are you, and what do you want?
HAIRY GUY: You know who I am, and you know what I want. (he turns around, to show two clumps in his back gone) Put them back in there right now.
COMMANDER: All right. (he tears the sideburns off his face, puts them back, then puts a "Kick My" sign on top of it)
COMMANDER: (thinking) Wait, is that right?
(he puts a small "e" sign over the "y")
HAIRY GUY: Now, don't you ever do that again!
COMMANDER: Look, I'm sorry, I just wanted something to use my sideburn comb on. (It glows again)
HAIRY GUY: Oh, Commander... Don't you see? You had the power within you the whole time. All you gots to do is rip some of your own hair out (he tears hair off the Commander's head), glue it to the side of your face (he glues it to the Commander's cheeks), and there you go! You're the king of the sideburn people.
COMMANDER: Wow, thanks, mysterious stranger whose hair I stole!
HAIRY GUY: No problem, Commander. It's always good to learn.
COMMANDER: Don't you mean, "it's always good to BURN?!" (points to his new sideburns)
HAIRY GUY: No.
(freeze-frame, buttons appear at bottom, which serves as the end screen)
== Easter Eggs ==
* At the end click on the Keentoons T.V. to see Commander get shot through the hand with an arrow.
== References ==
* Space Tree switches between several different colored bandanas during the episode, which go from red to blue to purple and organge; the same colors as the four bandana masks worn by the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
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