The Jackass Imitation (Thomas & Friends Lost Episode)

Warning, the stunts in the lost episode of this funnypasta were performed by train professionals. So for your safety and the protection of those around you, do not think about any of the stunts the engines did. Pretty weird am I right? But seriously, if someone were to perform what I had seen, I'd be responsible for the injuries. Oh, you're probably getting confused thinking this is a lost episode of the MTV show Jackass. Oh it's way different than that. First, let me start off by introducing myself. The name is Norman Bates.
Long ago, I used to run my hotel with my mother in which I cannot identify due to her being dead. And a lot of people say I killed my somehow friend Marion Crane. Now I actually didn't kill her, I used a needle disguised as a knife to try and give her some shots since she looked sick in the shower. And when they brought her back to life, she didn't die. How dare they blame me for the murder, blame it on my zombie mother. My mother was once a zombie who wasn't on the hunt for brains.
Anyways, have you heard of Thomas & Friends? It's about a train named Thomas and his friends who live on a big island in Sodor
(More to come)