Brisingr Part Eighty Six

== Brisingr! pt.2 ==
The people of the city fought hard against the Varden making them work for it all night and not being able to get to the keep until dawn.
Wait.
They fought in the city, during the night?
I don't remember it being dark or night. Wait. No... people in night clothes. Right. Right.
So, um... why are they fighting at night? I mean why hasn't there been any sort of disability mentioned for fighting at night? It's just as if they were fighting during the day. Why would you attack a city, do a city battle, in an unfamiliar city, with people who would have the home field advantage at night? That's suicide right there. No, that's more than suicide, that should have been a down right rout. For the defenders.
I mean, seriously, how stupid do ...
Oh. Wait. Sorry. This is the Varden I'm talking about. They chose their leader through Emo Chicken.
Carry on.
They finally get to the keep. It is very keep like. There are catapults in the courtyard.
Why are there catapults in the courtyard?
I don't know. But there are. Four of them.
Several thous.... how many fucking people do the Varden have?! And how can you fit several thousand of them in the area near where they're going to break the portcullis. Several hundred, sure! But several thousand, just lolligaging about? In a tight area? Where's the FIRE!? Seriously, that's a trap right there. They're all boxed it waiting for the battering ram to get through. And that number... and it's just
Gugh.
Ahgh.
Blgh
nnggggh.
I mean... that's how many people should be attacking the city all together. How many people do the Varden have? And why are they all lolligaging about at the keep as opposed to securing the rest of the city? It looks like they're having a battle of Healm's Deep in the middle of the.
Several thousand of the Varden stood pressed against the curtain wall, striving to break through the portcullis with the battering arm they had brought from the main gate of the city or else to surmount the walls with grappling hooks and ladders, which the defenders kept pushing away. Flocks of whining arrows arched back and forth over the wall. Neither side seemed to have the advantage."
Where for art thy burning cauldrons of oil? Where do you have the room for the archers in the area between the city and the wall? How is this bloody keep situated with in the city? How is it that the defenders, with the high ground up there and aren't actually sitting around like cows waiting for the slaughter not having the advantage? Where is Paolini's diagram of this bloody fight? I want to see it.
Eragon and Saphira show up.
Saphira goes to take care of the catapults which apparently have just been sitting there because they haven't started lobbing rocks at the Varden yet. Eragon goes to take care of the gate. It's magically enforced. The elves haven't taken care of it because it would take up a lot of strength.
You know that seems to be the number one reason that they don't use magic. It'll use up their strength. But what are they saving their strength for? I don't know. They're too busy saving it. Wait they don't want to use it because they're trying to save it to protect Saphira and Eragon. If they're trying to protect Saphira and Eragon why don't they stick with him?
Wait.
Logic.
My bad.
Sorry.
Eragon says that he'll deal with the portcullis.
He takes Brisingr, says its name so it catches on fire and starts to hack away at the gate. The counter magic spells on the sword counter the magic on the portcullis. Why didn't the elves use a counter magic spell on the portcullis? Why don't they use counter magic spells on anything!? This would save so much time and trouble!?
Eragon gets a bit drained from using Brisingr, because he decided to set the thing on fire.
The chapter ends with Angela showing up. She wants to know what he named the sword and berates him like an idiot for naming it fire and setting it on fire to cut the gate. He admits he did it because it was cool. She calls him an idiot again.
My guess is that this little scene was put in there as a tongue in cheek thing. Paolini probably showed it to his sister and she gave him a similar reaction that her namesake did.
Category:Brisingr
Category:Inheritance Cycle