The Meaning of Christmas

==Overview==
Double Heads Variety Hour presents "The Meaning of Christmas," where DJs Matt Fox & Dillon Minacci present a playlist combining solstice and Christmas songs. Dillon discovers Christmas, they meet a reindeer, and Matt explains his Christmas traditions. Listen to the episode.
==Episode Summary==
Matt Fox and Dillon Minacci are preparing to do an entire episode of Winter Solstice songs – since the DJs are both Orthodox Pagans – but Dillon quickly reveals a significant life update: he discovered Christmas. Matt begins to show signs of panic and explains that he's worked tirelessly to prevent Dillon from discovering Christmas for years. Dillon is very excited about the holiday and decided to curate Christmas music.
They get a call from Prancer, one of Santa's reindeer. He calls in to promote a special radio show happening on KOOP later that week, but also reveals that he is 200 years old and been divorced twice. He also seems fairly unhappy in his current marriage, and the DJs predict he's likely to get his third divorce soon.
They receive a second call from Joe Rotten (no relation to Johnny Rotten), who tries to convince the DJs to take some rotten meat off his hands. He has all types of cuts – from chicken to dolphin – and says that 2-3 months in the sun is the optimal amount of time for meat to rot. Roughly three years ago, Joe was kidnapped and brought to a bunker of unknown location, and by his best guess he's originally from somewhere near Sri Lanka. When the DJs ask Joe what he thinks the meaning of Christmas is, he tells them to go to Best Buy and purchase all the cheap Danny Glover DVDs out of the bargain bin.
Dillon explains to Matt that he only found out about Christmas when a letter from Santa dropped out of Matt's pocket last week when they were leaving the studio. The letter had Santa's cell number on it, and after calling, Dillon was invited to tour the North Pole. Despite the OSHA violations and excessive condo developments, Dillon fell in love with the area and especially enjoyed their brewery.
When Dillon asks Matt what he does for Christmas, it becomes clear that Matt has devoted all his holiday time to hiding Christmas from Dillon – which largely entails Matt reporting fraudulent theft reports on his own electronics so Dillon won't question why they don't talk during the season. When further prodded as to why he hides Christmas from Dillon, it's because Matt can't think of a good gift for him.
They get a call from Jim from Antone San who simply wants the DJs to clarify the narrative a bit, and they get a follow-up call from Johnny Theraflu, who is simply addicted to Theraflu.
They don't determine whether or not the genres complement.
==Characters==
Matt Fox
Dillon Minacci
Prancer
Joe Rotten
Jim from Antone San
Johnny Theraflu
==Featured Music==
Gene Autry - "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer"
Willie Nelson - "Night Life"
The Philly Specials - "Fairytale of Philadelphia"
Hank Williams - "Your Cold Cold Heart"
Joel Paterson - "Christmas Time is Here"