Twisting

"You're sure this will work," I whisper to my dolly. Silence. I stare into her lifeless eyes, waiting and waiting for her response. I look at her tattered dress, her dirty cloth face, her eye that's hanging on by a single thread, just waiting.
"Don't worry, I'm never wrong," I hear her say. Dolly's voice echoes in my head. Even after she says this, I'm still worried. It's a risky move, even after all these weeks of careful planning I'm afraid something will go wrong. I drop my pretty little dolly on the ground and slowly stand up. I feel so dizzy and my head aches. My eyes have adjusted to the darkness in my room... it looks so different. I always thought it was funny how the dark can change things. My grey dressing gown hanging on the steel knob of my small closet could easily be a person, waiting, standing so very still, getting ready to attack me. The spiders that live in the dark corners look so much bigger in the dark, huge black eight legged creatures. I stand in the dark, shivering, breathing hard, just listening. A spider moves and I squeal. I cover my mouth quickly and grab my dolly. I don't like when she gets mad at me, her angry voice scares me. She's shouting now, calling me a stupid coward, her eyes starting to look angry. I try not to cry, and pray I haven't woken HER up... That would ruin the plan. I stand up again, clutching Dolly to my chest, listening. Not a sound. 
"It's safe," says Dolly, quite loudly.
I shush her and grab my old winter coat. It's not much use now, one sleeve is ripped all down the side, and there are holes covering it, but it's all I have. I sometimes like to pretend it's much prettier looking and being in the dark helps me imagine. Dolly tells me to stay focused. I slowly start tip-toeing out my bedroom door. I stop dead in my tracks when a floorboard creaks, breathing heavily. My eyes are fixed on her door. Her.... Mother. Mother's door, the door with the brass knob. Memories of going in there and having my neck twisted and twisted and twisted come rushing back to me, causing tears to run down my cheeks. But I need to keep going. S-she's fast asleep now, right? I hold my breath as Dolly and I pass by her door. Another floorboard creaks. This time I keep going.
I'm at the stairs. So close now. Then she can't twist my neck... the awful choking sounds.. the rough, cold hands just twisting and twisting and twisting. I touch my neck with my hand. Still sore. It's all black and blue for some reason... I think that means it's bruised? Dolly shouts at me, telling me to stay focused. I begin walking down the stairs, wincing as another floorboard creaks. Every step I take, I just know she's watching, o-or she can hear me. I'm sweating now. Beads of sweat roll down my forehead. I can't wipe it off, not now. I can't help but feel like a cold pair of hands are twisting a-nd twis- Oh no. NO NO NO!! S-she woke up? I hear her angry voice call my name. Her footsteps quickening. I hear the brass knob of her bedroom door twist... soon my neck will twist.. 
I look at Dolly, waiting for her to tell me what to do. "RUN!" she screams. I run and run. When I reach the kitchen door, mother is already on the stairs running down them, just like I was. I twist the knob of the kitchen door. Why won't the door open?! WHY?! M-mother is getting closer. I can't help it... I can't stop sobbing. I curl up in a corner and hug Dolly. She screams at me, calling me words that I don't know the meaning of, words I'm not allowed say. I start to relax, thinking mother won't find me. My breathing slows down, and I don't feel as tense. But she does get me. Ow OW OW! M-my neck.. I scream and beg but she doesn't listen. I start to feel dizzy again, the room is spinning. Mother drops me on the ground. She smiles an evil smile as I gasp for air and rub my neck. She sees Dolly lying on the ground, one of her eyes now gone. Mother picks Dolly up and starts ripping her arms and legs off. I scream again, mother responds with, " Shut the fuck up!" I curl up in a ball and sob.
Dolly isn't feeling well. After mother ripped her arms and legs off, I had to use tape to put them back on, making her look strange. I never found her other eye. She hasn't spoken to me all morning. She just looked at me with a sad eye. I wish she would just talk, I feel so lonely. And she helps me tie my hair up. I tried doing it by myself but it looks all bumpy and messy. I buttoned up my dress badly too. Mother won't be happy, but it's all her fault. Dolly always helps me get ready but now she can't, all because my mother is a mean cow. Oh! I hope she didn't hear. W-what if Dolly tells her what I said?! Oh no oh no. Please tell me she didn't hear, please! No, she can't have... I need to stop worrying...
Mother didn't let me have breakfast today. I told her I was sorry and that I loved her but she slapped me. I began to cry and she slapped me again, pushing me to the floor and kicking me. This went on for a few minutes. When I had the chance, I got up and ran to the bathroom, locked the door and sobbed. Dolly was angry, her only eye glaring at me. She told me I was a bad child, and I asked for it. It. What is "it"? Is "it" the twisting? The pain? The sadness? The never ending feeling of emptiness?!
I fell asleep in the bathroom. When I woke up, Dolly wouldn't speak. I couldn't make her speak. I still can't. None of them will talk to me! Why why WHY?! I need them, I NEED them. I can't even imagine their bodies, and their voices won't come to me. Why are they ignoring me, I just want to talk! Wait... what was that.. it sounds like a soft murmuring. I don't recognise this voice.. It's quite high-pitched. Is it calling my name? It's getting louder, more frantic. Why am I shaking, and my heart is pounding. W-what's going on?! I see mother's lady razors... It's very VERY sharp. What am I doing?! Why am I reaching for those blue snakes on my wrist?! Oh my Lord, this hurts, and there's blood all over the floor, mother will kill me. B-but why is everything slowing down, it's starting to get dark now, and I feel my body grow cold. My wrist is a bloody mess. As I look up I see all my friends surrounding me. Calling my name. They're back! I can talk to them again! I grab Dolly's hand with my good arm and she pulls me up. I feel so.. so light! Like a feather. And Dolly's arms an legs have been fixed! But she looks so big, almost resembling a cartoon. And I can't hear the voice anymore... in fact I can't hear anything. I can't really see where I'm going now. Where has Dolly and my other friends gone? It's gone black. I can't make out anything in this darkness.. not even huge spiders or dressing gowns that look like people.
OC
Category:Mental Illness