Any Given Sundance/Quotes

:Lisa: No toupees.
:Homer: Whaaat, I'm going for the Shia LaBeouf thing. Not quite a nerd, not quite a hunk. Shia LaBeouf!
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:Homer: I never wanted to be famous for being mean. I wanted to be famous for catching Santa Claus.
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:Jim Jarmusch: I can eat a raw onion without crying.
:Homer: Oh yeah? Prove it, Hollywood!
:(Jim Jarmusch eats an onion and tears up)
:Homer: Hey, you're crying!
:Jim Jarmusch: Yes, but I'm crying about something else.
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:Superintendent Chalmers: (about the Springfield Creative Arts School) The whole school is made up of modeling clay! Every afternoon, they re-shape it just to get my goat!
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:(Narration during Nelson's documentary)
:Nelson: I like to cry at the ocean, because only there do my tears seem small.
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:Homer: You stupid kid! What if I walked in here barefoot?!
:Bart: You are, dad.
:Homer: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! (angrily strangling Bart painfully / grunting)
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:Marge: Thank God they're not jeering at us anymore.
:Homer: I know. (pause) Kind of miss it.
:Bart: I know! We'll be in another movie. And this time we'll act really bad!
:Marge: No more Simpsons movies! One was plenty.
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:Marge: Sweetie, I'm usually your number one fan, but call me old-fashioned; I usually don't like movies that humiliate our family in front of the world.
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:(After seeing Nelson's documentary)
:Man: Hey, Nelson! Say something poor!
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:Homer: Robert Redford? Guess what. A scissor runs through it.