Microsoft Sam

Microsoft Sam is a sentient figure who is the star of Classic Sam Videos, hence the name being in the series. He’s also one of the main villains?? Anyways, despite the “Microsoft” in his name, it is unclear if he physically worked for Microsoft or not, but they do seem to acknowledge his existence.
== Physical Description ==
Sam is presented as a stick figure with a big head, a kind of deformed face, and red eyes.
Sam's old look pre-A New Look was a caucasian man with brown hair, red eyes, red shirt, Penn red pants, and yellow shoes. Whenever he was feeling evil, an image of the Epic Face was used. Also, whenever he turns into a zombie, an image of the original browncoat zombie from Plants vs. Zombies is used.
== Personality ==
Microsoft Sam can either be witty or be angry, especially when reacting to things. He also has a sense of pride, and talks down on things whenever he thinks he's seen something stupid. He also knows when someone is inferior, so he doesn't mind killing them if it's either convenient or if they're trying to kill or infect him. This doesn't always remain consistent, as one moment, he hates Microsoft Mike and Microsoft Mary, but later, he wants to team up with them to kill someone else.
He can be easily corrupted by power. For example, his main weapon was the Killing Machine, which normally kills people in an instant, and which Sam can use whenever he wants. This is probably why he thought he could just kill people willy-nilly if the time called for it.
As a zombie, he followed Dr. Zomboss without question, but he had almost the same personality as his normal self.
== History ==
Sometime after Mike creates the universe, Sam and Mary enter it while not having an idea of who created it. The three of them live together in the same house, which definitely isn't always a good thing. In fact, Sam develops a huge distaste for the other two, so much so that he ends up building a mansion on an island as an escape plan of sorts for later. For good measure, he ends up building steel walls that reach up to space, and the only reason he can go through them is because his helicopter, the ROFLcopter, has a hologram mode. However, once he is done blowing through that money, the only thing he can afford now is a Windows 95 computer. This is why he doesn't go here often, as he wants to keep using his Windows XP computer.
There ends up being a running joke where Sam keeps saying that Mike talks like a lady. There's sort of a similar joke with Mary, but it's a lot more major with Mike. One day, a week before July 1st of 2023, it all hits the breaking point. Mike borrows something from Sam, and Sam goes in his room to get it back. He then notices that the closet is open, and it is filled with Mary's clothes instead of Mike's clothes. Sam decides to confront Mike about this, thinking that he just made the discovery of a lifetime. But Mike just seems confused, because those were supposed to be Mary's clothes, not his. This is outright confirmed when Mary comes stomping in, asking why her brother's clothes are in her closet. They both accuse Sam of doing this, but Sam denies it, saying that he wish he knew who did this, and calling this situation hilarious. That does not help at all, as they force Sam to help them sort it out, or else they will eat his burritos. Ever since then, Sam has thought of them as truly expendable.
On July 1, 2023, Microsoft Sam begins his job, which is to read Windows errors created by Mr. B, who uploads the footage to the ClassicSamVideos channel. Before then, Mr. B changes his look from the stick figure form to a more humanoid form. But with this form came a little glitch where Sam can also be an Epic Face at certain points. Then, the computer’s OS receives changes to its design, and it gets the power to upgrade and downgrade to other Windows operating systems. Meanwhile, a villain known as Dr. Zomboss is approaching the house, so he and Sam come up with a plan to kill him. During the actual session, the fourth error inwardly reveals that someone is supplying these errors for Sam to read. In the next error, it is revealed that he has a "Homework Folder," which is currently two terabytes. Sam claims that it is actual homework, instead of it containing not-safe-for-work. The error after that reveals that he likes burritos, which a Blue Man from Microsoft tries to solicit in exchange for an interview that will be posted on the Microsoft website. Then, another error reveals that he has an AOL account that he uses for unknown reasons.
In the tenth and final error, it tells Sam to eat cake, or else Windows will never give him any gifts again. After eating the cake, Sam is supposedly turned into a zombie. Dr. Zomboss claims to be responsible, and with Sam's brain being zombified and under his control, he commands Sam to kill his two significant friends, Microsoft Mike and Microsoft Mary. They both go down without a moment's notice by using the Killing Machine, and Sam laughs maniacally right after. But then, Sam reveals that he didn't actually turn into a zombie, and kills Zomboss, too! Finally, now Sam is living mostly alone. After that, he decides to read 10 more errors, which involve (but are not limited to) available audio drivers that haven't even been downloaded, virus installations, and internet browser civil wars.
Mike, Mary, and Zomboss come back from the dead, and Zomboss turns them both into zombies so that they are easily controlled. Mike manages to bite Sam's finger before they both die by his weapon once again. Sam thinks he's won, but Zomboss laughs at him, because since the zombified Mike bit his finger, he is infected for real this time. Sam feels the effects of the zombie virus, and decides to read some errors until he gets his first mission from Zomboss. Windows XP gets scared and forces him to upgrade to Windows 11. When Sam hears that Windows 11 only has Microsoft Flight Simulator as a game, he tries to go to Windows 98 instead, but the downgrade machine broke. After that, more of the same shenanigans, including Task Manager being on crack, a 1 EB hard drive being possible, and Coca-Cola being the new meta instead of water.
Just like that, Sam receives a mission, which is to kill Crazy Dave. However, when he goes there, Crazy Dave uses a Doom-shroom, which instantly kills Sam. In the Afterlife, Sam is back to normal, and he realizes that Zomboss is the true enemy here because of the zombie empire thing. However, it turns out that the god of the Afterlife, Mr. Afterlife, revived Mike, Mary and Zomboss in order for Sam to be dead in the first place. Now that Sam is dead, he refuses to revive anyone...except for when he finds out that Zomboss loves pineapple on pizza. This causes him to switch gears and revive them all so that Zomboss can be dead, while also threatening to take care of things himself if they fail. Sam tries to kill Zomboss with the Killing Machine, but it is apparently too weak to kill him now. This could mean that it was sabotaged or it loses power every time it's used.
Sam attempts to upgrade the weapon in this house, but Zomboss manages to infect the two siblings! So, he uses his ROFLcopter to escape to Windows Private Island so that no antagonists can interrupt the upgrading process. The computer’s OS receives a design change to be consistent with the other computer’s, but it still doesn’t receive the power of OS switching. Funnily enough, even though the computer here is Windows 95, the disk space upgrades to 3 exabytes due to an exploit, so that’s a direct result of Mr. B’s shenanigans. Anyways, the weapon is back to its original state, and Sam goes back to the house with his ROFLcopter. The Killing Machine is used once again, and Dr. Zomboss is dead...but there's one thing he forgot, and that's Mike and Mary. They now want to kill him, claiming that it's not just because they are zombies. Sam just uses his weapon to kill them before they can do anything, and reads some more errors. At one point, he is asked if there's going to be a 4th of July special for the YouTube channel, and he says maybe.
The error after that happens to be the 50th error of the entire series! It acknowledges that milestone, but Sam doesn't really care about milestones. Something troubling, though, is that the error warns him about a bomb. Before he can escape, the blast radius kills him and destroys his computer. It turns out that Mr. Afterlife planted this bomb, and not only did he want Zomboss dead, but he still wanted Sam dead, even though he just revived him. He now plans to revive Mike and Mary, and keep Sam trapped in the Afterlife forever. Three days later, on July 4th (but technically at the same time, because time is weird), Sam decides to celebrate Independence Day, but he has no fireworks. So, he goes on one of the Afterlife's spare computers and tries to order some fireworks. It should be noted that even that received a design change, because Mr. Bfigured Microsoft Sam would end up using it. But when he is asked for an address, he realizes that he doesn't know it. Mr. Afterlife says that this place is supposed to be outside the comprehension of mere mortals, so it doesn't have an address. Sam asks him how else he's supposed to celebrate Independence Day, and Mr. Afterlife blows him up with another bomb as a joke. It doesn't do anything since he's already dead.
As revenge, and also as a last-ditch effort, Sam uses the Killing Machine against Mr. Afterlife. It actually works, and he obtains the Orb of Light that drops from the god. He deduces that he can revive himself, of course doing so. But then, for some reason, he doesn't feel safe in his own home, and uses the ROFLcopter to escape, because the steel walls there reach up to unimaginable heights. There are two different reasons why he felt the need to do this. One, he thinks that someone else could crave the power he now has, so he does this for safety. Two, he had a feeling that Mike and Mary would come back somehow, but he didn't know how. Both are equally as likely, or they could both be true at the same time. Anyways, he writes a note for whoever is attempting to come look for him, goes to the Private Island, and reads some mediocre errors. The 10th error points out that the steel walls may not be as indestructible as he thinks, but he knows that no other helicopter can get through here, so he thinks it's fine.
Mike and Mary never find him, and Sam ends up chilling in the Private Island for more than 2 months. Mr. B decides to change Sam's look back to the original, the new look Sam didn't really like anyway. He also gets a new Windows XP computer, and throws the Killing Machine in the Retcon Room in exchange for the ROFL-47 Machine Gun in the island. This is done using the Orb of Light's power, which he uses to get infinite ammo, too. Finally, the Homework Folder is renamed to the Shm3xy Pr0nz folder. Then, on September 23rd, the error series is continued, with the computer receiving the design change and the power of OS switching. It is later revealed that there is at least one other person who lives with him in the island, and that is Twix. Twix used to be known as Twitter, a blue bird, but they unlocked a new identity, that being an X, and they can switch from one to the other based on feelings, as implied by their new name. However, Sam dislikes Otherkin people, not to mention that his jokes and responses have noticeably gone a bit more edgy than in the last episodes. Anyways, soon, Mr. B announces that there are two new series coming to the CSV channel, and that his cousin is giving them a supply of errors and signs from a canceled project. Sam decides to read these signs and errors on the same day, and he does the other new series, which has him read community submitted errors from the same website that Mr. B is using to create the errors. Meanwhile, doing this series again is reminding him of Mike and Mary, so he makes a couple remarks of how breaking into his island will be their end.
But then, something strange happens. In the 10th and final sign of Episode 2 for the signs series, he says the hard-R N-word out of pure impulse because of an image in the sign. Luckily, the episode cuts to Mike's test bar screen before the full word could be said. Unknowingly to him, he just revived Mr. Afterlife because of something that Mike set up if he ever becomes the Orb of Light. A week later, technically, on October 5th, just as Sam was forgetting about Mike and Mary, Mr. Afterlife confronts him and explains that he's always disliked Sam, due to his personality and how he treated Mike and Mary all this time. Even when he revived Sam that one time, it was never about killing Zomboss; he wanted to see Sam try and fail at working with his friends. He then explains to Sam what happened a week before the CSV channel started. The point is, it is the catalyst to how Sam got the mental capacity to finally throw out his friends. And to make matters worse, Mike and Mary finally reach the Private Island, use the Doom-shroom to blow a hole through the wall, and enter the mansion. Sam rages due to Crazy Dave being responsible for this event. Mr. Afterlife asks Mike if he can strike Sam down and send him in the Retcon Room, Since they didn't expect Mr. Afterlife to be alive, Mike lets him have his way.
But before he can do that, Sam challenges him to a fight. Whoever wins gets to rule the world, and whoever loses is trapped in the Retcon Room. Mr. Afterlife agrees to these terms, and of course, Mr. Afterlife wins since Sam does not have the power of the Orb of Light anymore, nor the Killing Machine. But during the ending of the fight, Mr. Afterlife accidentally touches a Mini Mushroom and shrinks to a small size. Sam then realizes that he still has his ROFL-47, and shoots too many bullets to count. However, since Mr. Afterlife is so small, he easily dodges them. Sam prepares to shoot again, but then he finds out the hard way that the Orb of Light isn't there to provide infinite ammo anymore. Right then, Mr. Afterlife is back to normal size, and since Sam has nothing left to defend himself, he uses his powers to send Sam to the Retcon Room once and for all. With nothing else to do, Sam manages to find a spare computer and read errors, but he can only do it on Windows 11 since the computer thinks he doesn't deserve any other system. It also receives the design change. The interesting part is that this is the first appearance of error requests, there being two of them. He also gets news of a guy known as DefenderMan505 making a fanmade intro for the CSV channel. Next, he shows one of birdie's videos and jokingly states that it's a part of his Shm3xy Pr0nz, when that's not actually true. Finally, an error reminds him that he can use the Killing Machine to bust through the Retcon Room door, proving that it wasn't entirely a mistake after all.
== Appearances ==
<tabber>Arc 1: A Rogue God=
* Episode 1 - Zombified
* Episode 2 - Evil Sam
* Episode 3 - For Real This Time
* Episode 4 - Defeat of the Boss
* Episode 5 - Sam's Defeat
* Episode 6 - An Independence Day Short
* Episode 7 - The Truth
* Episode 8 - A New Look
* Episode 9 - Beginning of Signs
* Episode 10 - The Story Continues
* Episode 11 - Annoying and Unfunny Errors
* Episode 12 - Revival
* Episode 13 - Cruel Mike's Thesis
</tabber>