Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things

==The Episode==
A genuinely good movie! A tropical variant Mr. Lobo! A full house of Cinema Insomnia stars and guests! And a horror host crossover for the ages!
===Wraps===
(The Cinema Insomnia term for the host segments)
Wrap 1
Mr. Lobo, Babs from the Front Desk, and the Pee-Nut Fairy Twins have arrived for their vacation in the Twins' native land, Obelisk Island. Miss Mittens is there, too, but sleeping one off. (According to Mr. Lobo, she regresses to her prehistoric man-eating form after particularly hard benders, and ate a few natives.) The staff play a little prank on Mr. Lobo, which causes him to go off on a diva rant about how he'll leave them all behind when his Sputter deal comes through! Then he introduces the movie, finding that the Night of the Living Dead piano sting has come on vacation, too. Reel 1 begins!
Wrap 2
Mr. Lobo tries to set up Miss Mittens for some of their classic banter, but she's too drunk on hooch and islanders to care. Mr. Lobo tries to get a rise out of her by threatening to replace her, and when she doesn't respond, he decides to venture out into the jungle and actually do it!
Wrap 3
The fashion in Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things has made Mr. Lobo nostalgic for his groovy wardrobe from the '70s, but Miss Mittens mistakenly packed his Beetlejuice pants in place of his disco chic. I mean I say mistakenly, but she probably just didn't care, right folks? That's our Mittens! Then Mr. Lobo and Babs from the Front Desk lead us in the Insomniacs Oath.
Wrap 4
Cover your ears, because Mr. Lobo's made a wardrobe change, and it is LOUD! He's wheeling and dealing and plotting to leave all his coworkers behind when he hits the big time. I think I hear uppance coming!
Wrap 5
Mr. Lobo must not have found any talented plants in the jungle, so he's bringing Miss Mittens in on his deal with streaming service Sputter. They have the entire Dollar Store Jason series in their library! Unfortunately she's still unimpressed. Possibly deceased.
Wrap 6
Mr. Lobo explains that his agent is also vacationing on Obelisk Island, and that he has an agent. THE Gernie Gonax! Mr. Lobo lists Gernie's accomplishments and qualifications, and speak of the devil, here's Gernie now, with Babs from the Front Desk and the delivery girl (Countess Bloodsugar)! I can't, in text, do justice to the physical comedy that happens, but Gernie's dead. Don't play with him, kids! Back to the movie!
Wrap 7
Gernie's still dead, and Mr. Lobo's still impressed by his verve. "Tough as a DOOR NAIL, they call him!" Babs and the Countess take Gernie water skiing to cover up his deadness, and Mr. Lobo throws to commercial!
Wrap 8
Time for Trivia in Cinema! Apparently, the same man was responsible for Rhinestone and Baby Geniuses, and he died a free man. And speaking of dying, here's Death incarnate! Or should I say inboneate! Thank you! Back to the movie!
Wrap 9
Snack Bar Segment! With guest snacker, legendary horror host, Sally the Zombie Cheerleader! She's going to teach us how to make Flesh-O from a recipe by afterlifestyle guru Maggot Stew, how to spell "brains" (seventy six thousand hundred As), and how to playfully violate Mr. Lobo's bodily autonomy. 
Wrap 10 
Sally the Zombie Cheerleader's playing a little traditional island music on her boombox, and Gernie likes it! Mr. Lobo once again turns to John Stanley's Creature Features Movie Guide for some critical insight into tonight's movie, and Mr. Lobo summarizes John's review: "ouch, John. Right in the Ormsbys!" 
Wrap 11 
Mr. Lobo's having a very productive meeting with his agent. It doesn't start out great: Mr. Lobo begging on his knees; Gernie dead. But they reach a result! Miss Mittens is back in the act! 
Wrap 12 
Miss Mittens returns! And she's tonight's Reel 7 Girl?? Anya says no, and she has the canned goods to prove it! Or, I'm having a hard time following her reasoning, and so is Mr. Lobo. Is she Mr. Lobo's wife? Who can say? But she takes over Reel 7 Girl duties and takes us back to the movie! 
Wrap 13 
Anya's still here, and she wishes to promote her (and Mr. Lobo's??) comedy improv troupe, Zreaks! It's like "freaks" with a Z. Mr. Lobo does not mince words when it comes to his feelings about improv, but he nonetheless has a sombrero with words in it, and invites people in the studio to prompt a skit. The Harbinger answers the call. 
Wrap 14 
Insomniac Mail Sac! A letter has arrived from Dr. Billy (whom you may encounter on the Cinema Insomnia and OSI74TV Twitch channels!)! He sent sweet spondulicks, and he speaks for all of us with the command: "do stuff!" 
Wrap 15 
Mr. Lobo wants us to mail him at 
Mr. Loboc/o OSI 74Box 74Atglen, PA19310
and Death wants to harvest Gernie's immortal soul. Good luck to them both in their endeavors! 
Wrap 16
Babs from the Front Desk and Countess Bloodsugar are innocently planning Gernie's schedule and choreographing his martini lunch with Tom Cruise, but the Countess may also be hatching a devious plan...
...besides new Disney Star Wars shows...
Wrap 17
Mr. Lobo is railing against capitalism, sweaty candy necklaces, and necrophilia. Man, doesn't he have ANY fun?
Wrap 18
Mr. Lobo's still trying to get through to Miss Mittens about the opportunity he's proposing, but he's learned that he'll be splitting hosting duties with other hosts, including his nemesis, Lady Skankenstein!
Wrap 19
Gernie's back, and he's on the job! He's negotiating with executives and sorting out rehab for Miss Mittens, and all I can say is that Babs and Countess Bloodsugar are GREAT puppeteers!
Wrap 20
Sputter's cutting a raw deal, but Mr. Lobo's still onboard, and still burning bridges! Gernie's still dead. The last reel of tonight's feature!
Wrap 21
The movie's over, and the deal has turned sour. Mr. Lobo is crestfallen. But he wants to live! Which is a shame because here comes Death. THAT'S A WRAP (21)! 
===Ads ===
*Duncan Hines "Deluxe II" and "Pudding Recipe" cake mix (1980)
*Girl Scouts
*Windex (with Stiller and Meara!)
*Chun King Chow Mein (with Stan Freiberg and Jesse White)
*Pampers (Making babies marginally less disgusting since 1961)
*U.S. Department of Health, childhood immunization PSA starring C3PO and R2D2
*"Rad" Abrams, Skate Board Attorney
*Gillette "Vacation Travel Kit"
*SCTV on Nick at Nite
*The Ad Council PSA: VD is for everybody!
*Space Dust fruit candy
*
*
===Trailers===
*Weekend at Bernie's (1989)
*The Undertaker and His Pals (1967)
*Evil Dead (1981)
*Swiss Army Man (2016)
*Night of the Living Dead (1968)
*Children of the Corn (1984)
*
===Shorts ===
*Mr. Lobo's interview with Terry Kiser (Weekend at Bernie's)
===Cast===
* Mr. Lobo...Mr. Lobo
* Miss Mittens...Miss Mittens
*Countess Bloodsugar...Jessie Seeherman
*Babs from the Front Desk...Dixie Dellamorto
*Gernie Gonax...Joe La Scola
* Sally the Zombie Cheerleader...Nicole M. King
* Anya...Roxanne Guarino
*Death...Wendy Sews
*Pee-Nut Fairy Twins...Cynetra Verona-Connelly
*The Harbinger...Aaron M. Lane
===Quotes===
===Trivia===
*Sally the Zombie Cheerleader is a legendary horror host in her own right, independent of Cinema Insomnia, and her show can be seen on YouTubehttps://www.youtube.com/c/SallyTheZomieCheerleader as well as Tingler Televisionhttps://www.tinglertelevision.com/.
*Mr. Lobo's agent Gernie Gonax is played by Joe La Scola, host of the podcast Movie Dumpster.https://www.moviedumpsterpodcast.com
*Behind-the-scenes footage of the production of the episode was streamed live on the Cinema Insomnia Twitch channelhttps://www.twitch.tv/cinemainsomnia.
*Fans who pre-ordered Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things on Blu-ray from the OSI 74 shop were given "associate producer" credits, including The Mighty Huey, who is a house cat.https://www.imdb.com/name/nm12648234/
*Mr. Lobo names some of his in-universe rival hosts: Dr. Lazybones, Uncle Spookypants, and Lady Skankenstein.
* Mr. Lobo lists some of the films in the "Sputter" streaming service's library:
** Hockeyface 1: The Return of Dollar Store Jason
** Hockeyface Part 2: The Discount Continues
** Hockeyface 3-D: Revenge of Hockeyface
** Dollar Store Jason: The Final Markdown
** Halloween Bloody Chainsaw Baby Doll Killers
** Killer Bloody Halloween Doll Babies
** Bloody Halloween Killer Chainsaws
** Chainsaw Halloween Killer Bloody Baby Dolls
*
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==The Film==
===Quotes===
Category:Episodes