Impractical SpongeBob

This was Purple133’s third Spin Off Kings episode.
Transcript:
SpongeBob: Hey Patrick, Erving, SquidClone, ever see that show Impractical Joker?
Erving: Yeah! I love it!
SquidClone: Yep.
Patrick: Sure.
SpongeBob: Let’s do our own version!
(The theme plays and main episode begins)
Announcer: Warning: The following program is about four best friends who do stupid things to embarrass each other. Coming up, why is Erving making dirty jokes? 
Erving: Do we have a Secret Agent Sharts A Lot?
Announcer: Why is Patrick passing the beat?
Patrick: Just take the damn mixtape and die!
Announcer: And which losing joker will be on the run in tonight’s punishment?
(Losing Joker is running through a trail on the woods screaming as paintballs and water guns are shooting at him)
Patrick: Hey guys, today we’re at Office Co. working as receptionists in the waiting area.
SpongeBob: The catch is that the other guys have written a list of ridiculous names for us to read off these names without laughing.
Erving: If you laugh, you lose.
SquidClone: Do we have a Cranjis? Cranjis McBasketball?
(Episode cuts to SpongeBob sitting at the desk and people walk in)
SpongeBob: Are you here for the focus group? Well I have to check for names and stuff so…
(SpongeBob flips the page)
SpongeBob: Do we have the Very Model of a Modern Major General? Anybody the Very Major Model of a Modern Major General? No? Okay.
(Flips page and laughs)
SpongeBob: Do we have Issa Peeza? Issa Peeza?
(Flips page)
SpongeBob: How about Doctor Finkleshits?
(Flips page and laughs again, counter goes up to two)
SpongeBob: How about Dennis Ho? Dennis Ho? Anybody here Dennis Ho?
(Flips page)
SpongeBob: Do we have Hartley McMcMc? Mr. McMcMc? Wow only two laughs!
(Screen goes black and white and SpongeBob gets a 2; Erving starts his turn by flipping page)
Erving: Do we have Secret Agent Sharts a Lot? 
(Starts laughing as he flips page)
Erving: Do we have VP of Understanding Learning and Developmental Processes of Robotics and Functions of Robotic Minds Sammy Canstandyourbitz? VP of Understanding (starts laughing again, counter hits two) Learning and Developmental Processes of Robotics and Functions of Robotic Minds Sammy Canstandyourbitz? No? 
(Flips page and laughs)
Erving: Do we have F**k Up McCormick? F**k Up McCormick?
(Flips page)
Erving: One more, do we have Deez Nuts? Deez Nuts?
(Screen goes black and white and Erving gets a 3; Patrick starts)
Patrick: Yes, I think I got the wrong list. Whatever, I guess I’ll see if anybody here are these people.
(Patrick flips page and laughs)
Patrick: Do we have Street Sh*t? Street Sh*t?
(Flips page and laughs again)
Patrick: Is anybody here by chance Michael Jackson 2, Electric Boogaloo? Michael Jackson 2, Electric Boogaloo? Yeah probably not.
(Flips page)
Patrick: Elaine “The Clock” Monson?
(Flips page and laughs)
Patrick: Do we have one Patrick Star Jr.?
(Behind screen)
Erving: That’s his son (laughs)
(Cuts back to Patrick where he flips page)
Patrick: Finally, do we have Mr. Man? Nope? 
(Screen goes black and white and Patrick gets a 3; SquidClone starts)
SquidClone: I’m just gonna start reading names.
(Flips page)
SquidClone: Is there a Guitar Gyro here? Guitar Gyro?
(Flips page and tries not to laugh but fails and laughs)
SquidClone: Do we have Gordon Ramsey? 
(Flips page)
SquidClone: Mark Fakshid? Mark Fakshid?
(Flips page)
SquidClone: Junior Junior the 3rd? Anybody Junior Junior the 3rd?
(Cuts behind screen)
SpongeBob: Patrick! How many donuts is that? 
Patrick: Seven.
Erving: There’s twelve in there!
Patrick: I can finish it.
(Cuts back)
SquidClone: Yep, I win!
(Screen goes black and white and SquidClone gets a one; screen cuts to the leaderboard)
Announcer: Names were confused for Patrick and Erving pinning them on the loser board.
(Cuts to a shopping store)
SquidClone: Today we’re at a shopping store holding a mixtape. 
Erving: We’re going to have to ask a person to hold the mixtape, but in the way the other guys tell us to.
SpongeBob: If the person doesn’t take the mixtape you lose.
Announcer: It’s Patrick vs. Erving in a Joker versus Joker challenge
(Erving goes first)
Erving: Oh umm (stops person)
SpongeBob: Just go, even though I hate your kind, please, take my mixtape.
Erving: (to random guy) Even though I hate your kind, please, take my mixtape!
Random Guy: Sure?
(Takes mixtape)
SquidClone: Oh my god he actually did it.
Erving: You know it!
(Screen goes black and white and Erving gets a thumbs up. Patrick goes in for his turn)
Patrick: (to Random Guy) Hi, I got something here.
Erving: Say, just take the damn mixtape and die.
Patrick: Can you just take the damn mixtape and die?
Random Guy: No! Jerk.
Patrick: Well all’s well that ends well.
SpongeBob: What?
(Screen goes black and white and Patrick gets a thumbs down)
(Screen cuts to leaderboard)
Announcer: Patrick couldn’t pass the beat making him tonight’s big loser.
(Cuts to the group at Bikini Bottom Woodland Walk)
SpongeBob: We’re here at Bikini Bottom Woodland Walk for Patrick’s punishment.
Patrick: Lemme guess, walking?
SquidClone: Well, you’ll see.
Patrick: Oh god now I’m worried.
(Cuts to Patrick walking)
Erving: So Patrick thinks it’s just a walk (cocks paintgun) 
SquidClone: It isn’t.
(The three run and start shooting Patrick)
Patrick: What the f**k?!
SpongeBob: You thought it was just a five mile walk? 
Patrick: No.
(Patrick starts running but crew members surround him and start shooting him with water and paintball guns)
Patrick: These are new pants!
SpongeBob: Yeah, well the worst sh*t is yet to come.
(Patrick starts sprinting the trail and makes it to the end, but the guys come out and dump a bucket of paint on him)
Patrick: What the f**k?! F**k  you guys!
Erving: Well that’s it for this episode!
(Screen goes black)
Category:Purple133
Category:Spin-Off Kings
Category:2018
Category:2018 Episodes
Category:Transcripts
Category:Episode transcripts
Category:2010s