Guadalajara

Guadalajara is a city in Mexico where tourists used to go when they wanted to hang out as beach bums in Puerto Vallarta. If the Mexican police in Puerto Vallarta want your pocket change, they'll take you to the prison in Guadalajara to be sodomized. Sodomy is quite prevalent in Guadalajaran prisons, as it is all over Mexico. 
The Chivas are from Guadelajara, one of Mexico's more awesome soccer teams. They recently lost to Internacional in Porto Alegre, Brazil (Portuguese Mexico), but they still have too much trouble speaking Portuguese Mexican through their thick moustaches.