Chapter Two: Putt-Putt Gone Bad

==Story==
Chapter Two: Putt-Putt Gone Bad
8:30 AM ON SEPTEMBER 26, 2009 THE UPSTAIRS BEDROOM
Shadow and Rouge were both sound asleep in the nice bed, with Rouge still cuddled up to Shadow. Knuckles was sleeping soundly, although he seemed to keep twitching in pain. Tails had fallen asleep on the floor, having apparently falling off his air mattress in the middle of the night when he did so. Sonic was sleeping in his own air mattress, but unknowingly Amy also was snuggling up to Sonic. As the sunlight fell through the blinds of the windows onto Sonic's eyes, he slowly woke up. When Sonic did, he noticed Amy still laying her head on top of his chest. Sonic's eyes went bug-eyed, then wide-eyed, then they exploded. The explosion sounded more like a pop, but it immediately woke up the Ultimate Life Form. When Shadow sat up, he consequently woke up Rouge the Bat as well.
"Mmm…Shady, what's wrong?" Rouge asked under her breath, tired. Shadow then looked down and saw Sonic starting to sweat bullets as Amy still laid her head on him.
"Nothing," Shadow replied, going back to sleep. Exactly 3 seconds later, many loud noises occurred downstairs. In order, it started with the 4 girls running downstairs while shouting, following by an incessant dog barking, then a thunderclap, followed by more of the dog barking, and finally another noise much similar to an explosion was heard. This consequently woke everyone, and everyone had bloodshot eyes from being awoken like that.
"Morning, Sonic," Amy said happily. Now that everyone else was awake, Sonic ran downstairs screaming. Amy then followed, trampling a confused Knuckles as she did so.
"Wait for me, Sonikku!" Amy shouted. Knuckles just laid there, clutching his stomach.
"Why is it always me…?" Knuckles wondered out loud.
Once the Sonic crew was all woken up, Shadow, Rouge, Tails, and Knuckles went downstairs to find the cause of the ruckus. When they arrived in the dining room, they saw the four girls all talking incessantly about everything on their minds. The dog was running around in circles, trying to bite at a scarf Nick's mom had put on her neck. Nick's mom was attending to the silverware, while an adult male, presumably Nick's dad, flipped some pieces of French Toast on the griddle. Nick was sitting patiently in his seat, already having pulled up several other seats for Sonic, Amy, Tails, Rouge, Shadow, and Knuckles.
"Hey, guys! Have a good sleep?" Nick asked. This prompted the four girls to notice everyone there. They all consequently huddled up, shouting.
"MOM! STRANGERS!" the youngest girl of the four shouted.
"Now, Jessie, these are our guests," Nick's mom informed. The four girls calmed down and sat back in their seats, although they were quieter now.
"Hey, have you seen Sonic and Amy?" Tails asked Nick.
"Sonic and Amy…" Jessie thought. The next notion was a self-explanatory one. Sonic came by the glass door leading onto the deck, and tried opening it before Amy could reach him. Unfortuantly, this was to no avail, as Amy dragged a crying Sonic into the room.
"Morning, everyone!" Amy cheerfully said. Shadow just stared at the pathetic blubbering excuse of a hero lying at Amy's feet.
"Heh. I am NEVER going to let you forget this…" Shadow commented to Sonic. Nick's dad then set down a platter of steaming hot French Toast on the table. The girls grabbed one apiece, and Nick grabbed two of them. Everyone else also grabbed one, though Sonic had some difficult with Amy clinging onto his arm like a lovesick puppy. Nick's mom then brought over a can of whipped cream.
"Okay, who wants some of the goo?" Nick's mom asked. Everyone had a questioning face on them, but Nick was the first to make the connection.
"When did we get whipped cream! WOO! I KNEW there was a reason I get up out of bed every morning!" Nick exclaimed. Nick's mom gave everyone a good helping of whipped cream, but Shadow just stared at the cream.
"What is this thing, Rouge? Some sort of plastic explosive that is edible?" Shadow asked, under his breath. Rouge just dipped her finger in her cream (NO NOT THAT WAY) and tasted it (NOT THAT WAY). Rouge's face then lit up in admiration.
"Shadow, this is delicious! You should try some!" Rouge recommended. Shadow then got his fork, picked up some of his French Toast with the whipped cream on it, and ate it. Shadow's face also lit up.
"Hmm…finally a food worthy of the Ultimate Life…" Shadow commented, before proceeding to eat the rest. Sonic was trying his hardest to cut his French Toast with a fork and knife, but Amy's constant clinging was proving to be difficult. Sonic then swallowed his pride and tried a new tactic.
"Amy, honey, could you PLEASE let go of me?" Sonic asked. Sonic knew asking normally wouldn't work, but sweet-talking Amy might. Amy seemed stunned by Sonic calling her "honey," and she prompty let go, amazed.
"Jeez this is not good for me at all…" Sonic thought. Tails was prodding at his French Toast, trying to figure out where they truly were.
"Can we trust these guys?" Tails thought. Knuckles, however, didn't seem to care as he ravenously ate all of his French Toast.
"Hey, can I have more!" Knuckles asked.
"Go right ahead! There's plenty more where that came from!" Nick's dad replied.
"YAY!" Knuckles shouted in a high voice, as he started devouring more French Toast as most of the people sitting down looked at him in confusion.
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NEAR NOON INSIDE THE CAR, HEADING FOR A UNSPECIFIED DESTINATION...UNLESS YOU READ THE CHAPTER TITLE
The clouds were foreboding dark, and rain was predicted soon. Shadow had no intention of leaving Nick's home until he realized where he was. And yet he still was managed to be convinced to go play some free putt-putt with Nick and three of his closest friends. Nick's mom was driving the car, with Nick in the passenger's seat. Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles were all occupying the three middle seats, with Rouge and Shadow in the back. Amy was sitting on Sonic's lap (much to Sonic's dismay and Shadow's pleasure), because there had not been another seat.
"I will get you back for this, Shadow…" Sonic thought menacingly, since Shadow gave Nick's mom and Amy the idea in the first place. The car kept riding down the smooth roadway, eventually coming across a four-way intersection. Turning left, the car went down a small hill and into a parking lot at the putt-putt course. Once there, Nick and the group already saw three other beings waiting for them. One was a short teenager with flat, brown hair and glasses. Another teen was a medium-sized teenager with glasses, short brown hair, and seemingly huge ears (for his size.) The final teen was about the same height as Nick, but he had some visible pimples on the sides of his face, along with a trimmed mustache and sideburns. This teen also had scraggly blonde hair. Nick and the gang got out of the car, golf ticket in hand.
"Good afternoon, Sean, Steven, and Alex!" Nick replied respectively to his three friends. Sean, the short kid with the normal ears, spoke up first.
"Who are your new friends, Nick?" Sean asked casually.
"Oh…they're...Sonic, Tails, Knuckles…Shadow…Amy…and Rouge…" Nick answered, trailing off slightly as he did so. Steven, the teen with bigger ears, then chuckled.
"Nick, how much Sonic games have you been playing lately?" Steven asked. Nick went wide-eyed and hoped no one had heard. Luckily, Sonic was busy running from Amy, and everyone else was preoccupied with seeing the world's hero running away from his lover like a small child runs from the dentist. Nick pulled his three friends aside, over by some vending machines in the corner.
"Look, guys. I'm serious here. I am NOT joking," Nick explained.
"Yeah, Nick. Like you were serious when you came up with that story to get out of that math quiz last week," Steven mentioned.
"Or like you were serious when you said you had a fear of Godzilla movies!" Sean added.
"Or like that time during gym class when those two hot girls asked us out, and you said that you had a girlfriend, because despite their hotness, one of them was a complete psychopath, and you left me there with both of them, and I nearly got abused in many ways," Alex added. A record needle scratch is heard, and Nick, Steven, and Sean stare at Alex in confusion. Alex just looked to both sides.
"What'd I say?" Alex asked.
"That never happened, Alex," Nick sighed.
"Yeah, but I needed to add onto the conversation with something! I don't want to be left out," Alex complained. Nick just sighed.
"Look, guys. Just listen to this," Nick informed, as he pulled out his cell phone and had them listen to what he had recorded last night. At the end of the recording, everyone stared in shock.
"You mean…?" Sean began.
"Why does everything awesome always happen to you, Nick?" Alex asked, jealous.
"What do you mean?" Nick asked, confused.
"The only awesome thing that happened to me was that time when I got drunk and fell into the pool during my birthday party last year, and I got revived by that one hot, bikini-clad lifeguard who then gave me Wii Music for free, despite that even then it was still like 50 dollars," Alex noted. Nick just did a facepalm.
"That NEVER happened, Alex…" Nick replied, annoyed.
"Oh…wait, then how did I get out of the pool?" Alex wondered.
"Are you going to putt-putt or what? It's going to rain soon," Steven added.
"Fine. Hey, guys!" Nick yelled. Sonic then ran into a wooden post as he turned in the direction of Nick's voice. Amy finally caught Sonic again, and she dragged him over to Nick and friends. Everyone else just walked up normally.
"Fine. We're here. So what's a 'putt-putt?'" Shadow asked, as if he was bored.
"Just miniature golf. Get a golf club, hit the ball, and get it into the hole at the end of the course," Nick explained.
"Fine. The Ultimate Life Form shall strike first, then," Shadow announced, taking a club and putting down a golf ball in front of the platform for Hole 1. Shadow readied up his stroke, and he saw the hole. It was a simple putt down a straight pathway, with only some hills altering the track. Shadow put up his golf club in a swinging position, smacking Sonic in the face and knocking him backwards as he did so. Shadow hit the ball, and it flew down the track at a fast speed. The ball hit the rim of the hole, and the ball's force made it launch into the air spinning. The ball came back down and landed directly in the hole, giving Shadow a hole in one.
"Hmm. Too easy for me," Shadow smirked, walking over to pick up the ball and proceed. Nick and the group just stood there, staring.
"He really is the Ultimate Life," Sean commented.
"Oh, come on! It's Hole 1! Like he'll hit a perfect game!" Knuckles started. The words "EPIC FORESHADOWING" appeared at the bottom of the screen. Knuckles then saw the words and acted surprised.
"Rouge! It's those words again! Why are they always backwards…?" Knuckles questioned, scared. The words disappeared, and Nick did a facepalm.
"Good Lord, these are Sonic characters…" Nick thought.
Sonic was next to putt. Sonic hit the ball just like Shadow did, but instead the ball missed the hole and stopped inches away. "OH, COME ON!" Sonic shouted.
Knuckles then took his turn, hitting his ball over into a corner near the hole. Rouge smacked her golf ball, but the ball landed far from the hole. Tails then took this opportunity to shoot his ball, which got close to the hole, but missed. Amy then took her chance to hit the golf ball with her club. However, she hit the ball too hard, and it bounced back, actually knocking Rouge's ball back into Knuckles's ball.
"Oh, no! I'm terrible at this game!" Amy whined.
"No, Nick is terrible at this game," Steven corrected.
"No, I'm not!" Nick disagreed. Nick then hit his golf ball, and it only proved his suckishness for the game. The ball flew over the track completely, bounced off of a rock, hit a squirrel clear out of a tree, broke a light on a lightpost, before finally coming to rest on Sonic's forehead. Sonic then fell to the ground, screaming in pain.
"OH MY GOD! MY FOREHEAD! WHO THE **** LAUNCHED THAT BALL!" Sonic screamed, not noticing Nick had hit it because he was thinking of ways to get back at Shadow. Before anyone could answer, Amy walked up to Sonic and started rubbing when the ball had hit.
"Sonic, are you…okay?" Amy said, putting a seductive tone of voice to her final word. Sonic just stared at her.
"Please don't hurt me," Sonic whimpered. Shadow just sighed.
"This is pathetic…" Shadow sighed. Alex then hit his ball over, and it landed near Sonic's ball. Finally, Steven shot his ball with such a pinpoint accuracy, it also landed as a hole in one. Steven walked up next to Shadow, with a similar expression of boredom on his face.
"Hey, can I try again?" Nick asked.
"NO!" everyone yelled. Sonic tried hitting his ball in again, which he was successful in doing. Knuckles then tried to hit his ball in, but he only managed to push it a little bit closer to the hole. Rouge's ball was also moved by Knuckles because of this, and she was able to get in a clean shot. Tails and Amy both got a hole in two, and Nick tried one last time to get the ball in.
"HIT THE DECK!" Tails shouted. Everyone impulsively landed on the ground as Nick hit the ball. This time, the ball just normally rolled towards the hole, but it was heading for Knuckles's ball as well. Knuckles opened his eyes and sighed in relief, as it would be impossible for the ball to any harm now. Knuckles then stood up, and Nick's ball hit Knuckles's ball. Just as Nick's ball LIGHTLY taps Knuckles's ball, Knuckles's ball flies upwards toward Knuckles at an incredible rate of speed. The ball hit Knuckles in the stomach, and he fell backwards, clutching his stomach.
"OH GOD THERE'S A BALL IN MY STOMACH!" Knuckles shouted.
"Totally what she said," Sean added. Shadow just walked behind Knuckles and smacked his back with the golf club. The ball flew off at a high speed, bouncing into a tree and flying high into the air. Nearby, a car was driving by, and the ball landed, crashing through the windshield. When this happened, the car randomly burst into flames. Everyone just stared.
"So…that was Shadow's fault, right?" Nick asked. Everyone looked at him angrily.
"Yeah…" Nick said sheepishly, backing down. "I'll just go get some Doritos…or something…"
"Nick, there is no way you're spending all of our money on food you won't share," Steven reprimanded.
"Hey! First off, it's MY money! Second off, we got in for FREE, lest you forget the membership card I brought!" Nick yelled.
"Yeah, the one you "found" that one day at the vending machine," Steven sighed.
"He was taking forever! Besides, it wasn't my fault he ran off and didn't listen to me when I told him he dropped his card…" Nick mumbled. Everyone just moved on to the second hole. After some boring putt shots, Shadow and Steven had again got another hole in one. Most everyone else already was completed with two strokes, and all that was left was Knuckles, who kept missing the hole.
"Eergh…I swear, it keeps moving!" Knuckles screamed at the inanimate hole. Knuckles then angrily smacked the ball, and it flew towards where Nick was at the vending machines. Nick was banging on the glass of one of the machines, trying to get to his Doritos.
"OH, COME ON! I paid you the freaking $2.50! Give me my overpriced and understocked chips before I break you!" Nick screamed. Just then, the ball broke through the machine, revealing all of its stock of foods and drink to Nick. Nick just clasped his hands together.
"Thank you…" Nick said quietly as he literally grabbed a shopping bag and took all of the snacks. Knuckles, however, smacked his head in annoyance.
"How could it be that hard to putt-putt!" Knuckles shouted.
"I still wonder how he's supposed to be guarding the Master Emerald…" Rouge sighed. Knuckles then remembered about his supposed lifelong duty.
"Oh, yeah! Hey, where can I find a large floating landmass with a shiny green jewel bigger than my body on this planet?" Knuckles asked Alex. Alex just backed away slowly.
"This is freaking me out now…" Alex thought. Nick, along with his goodies, came up to the second hole, and Nick got ready to stroke. Tails again saw Nick, but he was too late, as Nick had already hit the ball.
"RUN!" Tails shouted. Everyone tried hiding behind an object of some sort as Nick's putt bounced off of trees, broke through five car windshields, and devastated a secret underground community of mole people. Soon enough, Nick's ball eventually landed on the ground…and said ball was picked up by the manager of the golf course. Mr. Generic Manager Man ran up to Nick and pointed a finger at him.
"Young sir, we have had too much complaints from you and your companions rabble-rousing!" the manager declared. "We will have to ask you to leave, and also to return the goodies you have stolen from us!"
Nick's eyes went blood-red demonic as he clutched his snack bag. "The goodies you desire will be mine forever; let that be known when your soul descends to Hell!" Nick threatened in a demonic voice. Shadow just gaped.
"Okay, okay!" the manager backed off, scared. "Can you just leave?"
Nick went back to…SEMI-normal. "Okay," Nick calmly agreed. "Come on, guys. I'll call my parents," Nick offered.
"Why did we get kicked out by a plot device so early?" Shadow wondered. "Shouldn't we have at least gone through ALL 18 holes first?"
"That's what she said," Sean added. Steven then whacked him upside the head.
"Let's just go already…" Steven muttered.
"Aw, man! There's bubble gum packs in here! Hey, does anyone want bubble gum?" Nick shouted to his friends while scouring through his bag of treats that made Halloween look tame in comparison.
"Nick, I doubt your parents will let you keep ALL that junk food," Alex pointed out. Just then, the mole people Nick's golf ball attacked from before popped out of the ground and stole Nick's treats, even the bag itself. Nick reduced himself to crying. Shadow just did a facepalm.
"Was that seriously it! This chapter took forever to be released, and that's it!" Shadow yelled.
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5:00 P.M. SOMEWHERE WHEREVER BIOWARE'S HQ IS...COULD SOMEONE TELL ME IN THEIR NEXT REVIEW? I'M TOO LAZY TO LOOK IT UP MYSELF.
Meanwhile in…Japan or something…the executives of BioWare were scratching their heads in confusion. There were seven people in the room, three on each side of the big desk they were sitting at, and one at the head of the desk, presumably the boss. The boss stood up.
"Okay, everyone. How are we supposed to come up with a sequel to Sonic Chronicles if we have no material! Come on, SOMEONE think of something here!" the boss shouted.
"We could solidify Silver and Blaze's backstory, or bring Cosmo back to life," one of the executives mentioned. The boss just did a facepalm.
"We're working with SEGA, remember! Those idiots have to have a new Sonic game with at least one or more of the following: 1) new characters, 2) terrible plots, 3) rocks, 4) confusion about cliffhangers from previous games, and/or 5) a kick-ass theme!" the boss shouted.
"Why don't we do a game with a kick-ass theme then?" another executive asked.
"Oh, we pitched that last week, and they shrugged us off! But we should've seen it coming. I mean, they teamed up with 4Kids to make the American version of Sonic X," the boss mentioned.
"So, what are we going to do…?" one of the executives asked. The boss just grinned.
"We need to plan a heist," the boss answered. Everyone just stared at the boss in shock.
"You mean this parody has a foreshadowing PLOT! OH NOES TAH WURLD ES DOOOOOOMED!" the executive screamed.
==New Characters Introduced==
*Sean
*Steven
*Alex
*The BioWare Executives
===Head to previous chapter===
===Head to next chapter===
==Trivia==
*This chapter shows that one of Nick's character cons is his inability to play putt-putt correctly.
*Due to the footnote scene involving the executives of BioWare, it can be assumed SRC comes before the sequel to Sonic Chronicles: The Dark Brotherhood.
Category:Owner:INFERNOX/Sonic's Reality Check/SRC_Chapters