Analysis of the Audaxian Political Situation

You flip the switch on the redstone apparatus, igniting the tiny candle inside which activates the memory box. After crackling ominously for a moment, the device hums to life and resumes playing back the audio waves stored on the already inserted wax paper slip. The narrator has a rhythmic, bell-like timbre, speaking in the instantly recognizable and somewhat snobbish traditional Occan accent.
Analysis of the Audaxian Political Situation
an excerpt from the treatise, “The Democratization of Fear: Ideology is Dead (and how we killed it)
From the mind of Hsc. Arthur Mistwalkr
Albion, the King’s Writers
with special thanks to
the South Aquila Anthropological Society, et al
Synodde, 1st dawn, 4852
part of the larger series “Unmasking Audax”
Let me begin by making it abundantly clear that “politics,” as we fickle Aquilans understand the word, was born in Audax and will die in Audax. Yes, “government” as in the administration of the nationstate has always existed and likely always will; when I refer to politics, I mean the tendency of philosophers to insert their droll metaphysics into the state and call it Ideology. The Audaxians, being a generally glib and financially unproductive people, were the first to lay the groundwork of the modern nationstate when the Empire began to show signs of disintegration. The Imperials, regardless of your opinion, were a practical people and acted in accordance to the most favorable option of their given material conditions. When a Vassal showed signs of disobedience or productivity loss, the Senate punished them. When rumors of sorcery sprang up, the Senate crushed them. There was no ideology. They were men and women of logic and reason! And the “Nova Aquilans” for their brutish nature are right to emulate them.
The Audaxians, on the other hand, insisted upon projecting their misguided notions of entropic Growth and Decay upon the star, even going so far as to call for tolerance of actual sorcerers. From their calculations of entropy, the early philosopher kingdoms emerged, indulging in their preposterous debates and feeble attempts at democracy (I certainly need not remind the esteemed listener that the Audaxian cliques were among the last to outlaw arbitrary perpetual servitude) whilst the proud hegemons of Occa and even – and Notch forgive me for saying this – the bastard Kazimiri were entering the age of monetarism, building grand vessels of war and exploration which the Aquila we know today.
Owing to their ludicrous natural wealth and vast tracts of free arable land (most of which, let us be honest, they absolutely squander, but we are getting there), the Audaxians were free to live in everlasting comfort, basking in their abject hedonism while the rest of Aquila were preparing to defend existential threats such as the return of the Daemon-Sultan. As one final cruel trick of Emanation, Audax was left relatively unscathed by the War, allowing them to develop technology and infrastructure which today arguably rivals that of even the Commonwealth, all the while attending their ridiculous art galleries and sculpting PANDAS! A dumb species which they imported from the devil Khotanese and bred and raised in their backyards – and CHARGED ENTRY for. Pure ideology!
The astounding absurdity of the continent’s present political situation should come as no surprise then. It is presently split between the two equally illegal states of the Audax Federation and the Sivellan Republic. Let us first examine the former. It is the larger of the two protostates, encompassing all of the west and thus nearly all of the continent’s agricultural output. It is a bountiful land, filled to the brim with untold natural wonders and governed by idiots. In the… hallowed halls of its “capitol” Tyrell, dumb farmers from across the Federation congregate to discuss how best to squander their real estate and destroy their own economy. This governing congregation is practically powerless, allowing crime to run rampant in the countryside. There have even been sightings of occultists absconding away with unfenced sheep in the night for Mother knows what sinister purposes. The myriad farmers that populate this anarchic wasteland spend their days tilling their pathetic farms only for purposes of subsistence, never even considering expanding into surrounding plains so as to improve their output and – brace thyself for this revolutionary concept – export something, anything. Some more intrepid citizens exist in the form of the humble plantation owners in the Eustaros region, who have been known to employ foreign labor and export their surpluses of beet and berry to nearby Nova Aquila. I shall eat my hat if these more productive farmers don’t at least have a few drops of proud Occan or even Dreitonian blood in them for their industriousness.
And yes, let us not forget the stretch of nether that exists to the Federation’s east – that even more nefarious and deplorable rogue state cynically called the Sivellan Republic. Centered in the Aquilan capital of sin and excess, Valencia, it should come as no surprise that this poor excuse for a republic is constantly on the verge of collapse. Two somewhat distinguishable factions dominate this hovel, who are at present in a state of cooperation to develop their means of production. The first are the abhorrent corporatists, a dangerous bunch who seek scientific progress and industrial automation at all cost, seeking to organize society into a unitary collective of craft unions who receive production demands from the central congress in order to meet nation-wide quotas for massive industrial projects. More animalistic still are simply the anarchists, sometimes called “autonomists” by themselves to present as being more sophisticated. Anarchism has long plagued the more productive societies of Aquila, but this particular clan are among the most accomplished. They reject hierarchy in all forms, believing that it would be sufficient to allow independent local communes to self-govern and cooperate with other entities on the basis of mutual aid. The corporatists are at least concerned with economic growth. These anarchists are objectively voluntarily hurling towards self-destruction.
What is the sum of these excesses? The Republic and the Federation are locked in a state of cold war, with both sides seeking to unite the continent but neither seeking to be painted as the aggressor. It is the opinion of myself and many other scholars that the best option for the Audaxians is to simply maintain the current state of affairs and patiently wait for a more civilized power to come and organize their society for them, since they are clearly not capable of such a task. The closest they ever came was the abject tyranny of Prince Clockwork, who at least was intelligent enough to recognize the necessity of a STANDING ARMY. Bear with me. I shall need to proceed to the next chapter lest I lose my temper.
Category:Invidere