Yolo/Quotes

:(Lisa is in the fourth grade classroom about to show the honor code to the students)
:Lisa: Hello children. I hold before you a copy of the school's new honor code. (the students groan) I know if I can get the toughest kid to sign it, the rest of you will sign it. (points the pen at Millhouse) Millhouse?
:(Millhouse goes to the front the sign the honor code to sign it but is pushed out of the way by Nelson)
:Nelson: He's not the toughest kid, I am! (signs the paper and goes back to his seat)
:Lisa: Now the smartest kid. Millhouse?
:(Lisa gives the pen to him but then Martin snatches the pen from him)
:Martin: He's not the smartest kid, I am! (signs the paper and leaves)
:Lisa: Now, the class nerd. Millhouse? 
:(Millhouse is looking hopeful that someone else is the class nerd. but no-one appears to be coming down. He then accepts the position and signs it)
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:Mrs. Krabappel: (giving a test to the fourth-grade) Now don't forget, this is the first exam under the new honor code. (Principal Skinner, Superintendent Chalmers and Mrs. Hoover watch the kids from a window)
:Principal Skinner: They're doing it! They're self-proctoring!
:Superintendent Chalmers: Can't you say anything in a normal way?
:Principal Skinner: The answer, sadly, is not yes.
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:(Lisa is standing in front of her locker. She opens up her backpack and finds a stick of dynamite with the fuse burning, a Lisa voodoo doll, a slingshot and some crumpled papers.)
:Lisa: Uh. I got Bart's backpack.
:(She licks her fingers and puts out the fuse on the dynamite. She then finds Bart's test papers.)
:Lisa: (looking at the test papers) He got a hundred on his test? That's impossible!
:(She goes through his papers and sees that they all have perfect scores.)
:Lisa: (gasps) Is Bart cheating?
:Bart: Are the Pope's tweets infallible? (He sticks his phone out and shows the Pope's tweet. Bart then laughs.)
:Lisa: (angrily) Bart, I'm gonna tell!
:Bart: No. You're not. Because if you tell people I cheated, that means your system failed.
:Lisa: Oh my God! You found a loophole! Why don't you put this much inventiveness into your work?
:Bart: 'Cause then I'd be the one thing I swore I wouldn't: you.
:(Bart then leaves the hallway while whistling. Then Lisa is shown with a worried face.)
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:Lisa: (steps in front of Bart, scaring him) Ha! (Bart screams) You've presented me with quite a conundrum, a word you should know since it was on a vocabulary test, you aced! (laughs) But after some thought, (rips off part of her hair) all my worries went away! (blows her hair off) I know the answer! I gonna force you to turn yourself in!
:Bart: Good luck with that! The only thing that will change my mind is a sign from God! (Homer falls from his parachute jump on top of Bart, crushing him)
:Homer: Son, it was so beautiful! I went faster than the speed of sound! (Homer's scream hits the ground seconds later)
:Lisa: Well Bart, is that enough of a sign for you?
:Bart: All right! I'll turn myself in! It'll give me a chance to work some more on the detention quilt.