Transcripts/Gwonam and the Nefarious Crate

This is the transcribed dialogue and actions from the episode Gwonam and the Nefarious Crate.
Gwonam flies to the castle balcony.
Gwonam: Your Majesty, is it here yet? Has my package arrived?
King Harkinian: In the kitchen.
Gwonam *off-screen*: At last! It's here!
The package is revealed to be a large wooden crate.
Gwonam: What the foridai. 
Gwonam: No matter; I can open this in a heartbeat.
Gwonam holds a crowbar and tries to pry the crate open, but ends up snapping the crowbar in two. He gets back up, his face already showing disappointment.
He tries burning the crate with a welding torch, jumping repeatedly on top of it to smash it open, and later that night tries to force it open with a jackhammer.
The next day, Gwonam has strapped a remote bomb to the side of the crate, and is holding the switch. He detonates the bomb, which only smears soot on the outside of the crate. Gwonam, knocked down by the explosion, gets back up... his whole front half having been charred by the blast.
Gwonam then takes to the skies in his X-wing, sets the s-foils in attack position, and targets the crate; he fires a volley at it and manages to strike it once, but the crate bounces away unharmed.
Later, King Harkinian gazes up towards the Death Star, which is parked in orbit. It begins its primary ignition sequence and fires directly at the wooden crate on the planet surface, annihilating everything nearby. Gwonam views the carnage from the Death Star bridge.
Gwonam: Oh, it's beautiful!
He then spots the crate, which is still fully intact.
Gwonam *off-screen*: WHAT THE FUCK!
An unspecified amount of time later, Iron Knuckle grabs his sword to chop the crate open. He takes a single swing and strikes the crate, but the only thing to break is Iron Knuckle himself; his armor completely falls apart as Gwonam, Zelda and Hektan watch.
As a last-ditch effort, Gwonam blasts loud music from a boom box right next to the crate, attempting to shake the crate open with the power of sound, to which I.M. Meen covers his ears to protect them from the distracting noise. The boom box ends up overheating, causing it to explode in a violent puff.
Gwonam: That's it. I give up. This stupid thing is a waste of my time. You can have it!
Gwonam flies away. Harkinian looks at the crate more closely, and notices a blinking red button on its side.
Harkinian: Hmm... What's this?
Harkinian presses the button, revealing a PlayStation 5 console.
???: POOTIS!
King Harkinian: HOLY SHIT!
The episode ends.
Category:Transcripts