Happy Tree Friends 3D/Transcript

Transcript of the 2014 adult-animated film Happy Tree Friends 3D.
== Part 1: Today's the Day! ==
(The Warner Bros. Pictures and New Line Cinema logos play. Then, we pan down to a colorful land as a few opening credits play. The camera flies through many animals before settling into a town, while the song "We Got The Beat" plays.)
Generic Tree Friend #1: Oh my god, I can't believe it! It's our town's centennial!
Generic Tree Friend #2: I know, right? We gotta get all this crap set up before the day.
(Meanwhile, Flaky the Porcupine and Sniffles the Anteater were carrying a box full of nails.)
Sniffles: Careful there, Flaky. One drop and you're dead.
Flaky: I know. That's why I put safety first!
Sniffles: I know you do.
(Suddenly, Nutty the Squirrel hits the box, tipping it over and causing nails to scatter everywhere.)
Sniffles: Oh, crap! Watch out!
(Nutty fell to the ground.)
Flaky: What the heck was that, Nutty? You could've gotten yourself hurt! Or worse, possibly die!
Nutty: Oh-ooh.
(Flaky sighed and rolled her eyes.)
Flaky: Whatever. Come on, Sniffles. Let's put all the nails back in before anyone else steps on it.
(Flaky and Sniffles began picking up the nails carefully. Meanwhile, Disco Bear danced on the disco floor. He spotted Giggles the Chipmunk and Petunia the Skunk.)
Disco Bear: Hey, girls! Come check this out!
(Disco Bear danced to the tune of "Stayin' Alive". Giggles and Petunia watched and giggled.)
Giggles & Petunia: You rock, Disco Bear!
Disco Bear: Because I always do!
(Handy the beaver was hammering a stage with his mouth.)
Handy: Easy does it. Easy does it. Whoa!
(The ladder nearly tips over and some of it falls near Toothy the squirrel, who was holding the ladder for Handy.)
Handy: Toothy, you damn idiot! You nearly made me fall!
Toothy: Uh, may I remind you, Handy, it's not my fault there's a small breeze out there!
Handy: Whatever, you purple fuck.
Toothy: What did you say?!
Handy: Nothing.
(Then we move over to Lumpy the Moose, who finished hammering a nail on a stage.)
Lumpy: Alright, stage set up! Now it's time for me to tell Cuddles.
(He walks away. Meanwhile with Cuddles the Rabbit in a hall, he was busy reading his cards.)
Cuddles: Let's see... "Good morning, all!" Nah, that sounds too generic. "Happy centennial!" No, too clunky. Uh...
(Lumpy barged in through the doors.)
Lumpy: Hey, Cuddles!
Cuddles: AH!
(Cuddles fell over.)
Cuddles: Lumpy? Oh my god, you scared me!
Lumpy: Sorry.
Cuddles: Anyways, what do you want? Can't you see I'm busy practicing my lines for the ceremony right now?
Lumpy: Just wanted to tell you I've finished my job.
Cuddles: Great. Now help out Russell and Flippy with some pastries. And then I'll help Mime with the balloons.
Lumpy: Alright! Gotcha!
(Lumpy bumps his head in the wall. He moves aside to exit the building.)
Cuddles: How do you do that? But then again, he's Lumpy, so it's no surprise.
(Cuddles overhears something in an obscured room. He looks to see a monkey meditating. He was in the middle.)
Cuddles: Whoa. Who are you?
Buddhist Monkey: I believe.... something..... bad...... will........... happen.....................
Cuddles: Really? There hasn't been much that happened to us in the past.......
Buddhist Monkey: I only predict the future... You all just be careful now.
(Cuddles was confused.)
Cuddles: Umm... okay?
(The scene then pans up to space, where we are shown an alien ship. Its commander, the Alien Leader, was sitting at a conference table, along with several other aliens.)
The Leader: God damnit! I don't know what the fuck to do! We've tried every planet in the galaxy, and none of them seem to work out! I've tried Earth, and they killed our entire fleet! Barnard's planet, they killed another! AAGHH!
(He slammed his hand on the table.)
Alien #1: Sir...
The Leader: What?!
Alien #1: Uhh... maybe try it again? After all, our technology has advanced further.
The Leader: Oh, yeah, I will try that! NO!
(The Leader knocked Alien #1 off his seat. Alien #1 groaned.)
Alien #2: Definitely wouldn't wanna be him.
Alien Commander: Sir, can't we look at the radar? I mean, we've got plenty of other planets to look for other than Earth. Or Barnard's planet. We'd also be even more lucky if our next planet's just hapless little creatures with no freedom.
The Leader: I know. There must be a way...
(Then, a beeping sound was heard. It began pulsing.) I 
The Leader: Hm?
(The Leader looked to see a planet that appeared with blue water, and mostly pink and green land. He zoomed in to see the creatures being woodland animals.)
Alien Leader: What is it, Great Leader?
(The Leader snickered.)
The Leader: Commander, prep everyone. I think we've got our target.
Alien Commander: What do you mean?
(The commander got up and watched the planet.)
Alien Commander: Ah... I see.
(The commander turned to the rest of the aliens.)
Alien Commander: Your attention, please! Gear up every alien we've got! We've got a big one in our hands!
Aliens: Sir yes sir!
(The aliens scrambled to prepare themselves.)
Alien Commander: Looks like this'll be easy-peasy, lemon-squeezy.
(The leader snickered evily.)
The Leader: Tick tock, little creatures. Prepare to meet your doom.
(The screen faded to black, with only the leader's and commander's eyes being visible.)
== Title Sequence ==
For the credits themselves, see: Happy Tree Friends 3D/Credits, as this only describes the visuals in the sequence.
(The words "Happy Tree Friends" pop out, with "3D" shining into view and a heavy metal cover of the Happy Tree Friends theme song playing. We then zoom in to a tree stump, with an X-ray of Giggles being impaled by a bar, referencing her death in Spin Fun Knowin' Ya.)
(The pole is then zoomed in and transforms into a rhino horn, which goes through the head of Toothy, referencing his death in From A to Zoo.)
(Cut to a close-up of a chain-link fence, then cut to Flaky going through it. Her X-ray shows her bones and organs being cut into pieces, referencing her death in Ski Ya, Wouldn't Wanna Be Ya!.)
(A wrecked car is seen being lifted up and blood and guts pour out of it, referencing Nutty's death in Chew Said a Mouthful.)
(Cut to a freeze-frame of Toothy's right eye being forced out of his socket, referencing his injury from Eye Candy.)
(Then cut to a potato peeler going through a piece of skin, referencing Petunia's death from Wishy Washy.)
(Show The Mole's head being crushed by a drill machine, referencing his death from A Hole Lotta Love.)
(Cut to an elevator, which first dings, and then closes, referencing Sniffles and Cuddles' deaths from See You Later, Elevator.)
(Then stop at a frame of Mime popping like a balloon from As You Wish.)
(Cut to a sign swinging from the right into the audience, referencing Petunia's death from Eyes Cold Lemonade.)
(Show a brief glimpse of Disco Bear getting his head crushed by a piece of popcorn from Aw, Shucks!.)
(Cut to a boiler falling towards the audience, referencing Lumpy's death from Wishy Washy.)
(Cut to a body being impaled by a wooden peg, referencing Nutty's death from The Wrong Side of the Tracks.)
(Then cut to a body being melted by gold, referencing Shifty's death from Sea What I Found.)
(Transition to a frozen explosion penetrating through a body, referencing Lifty's death from Swelter Skelter.)
TBA.
== Part 2: Something's Wrong ==
TBA.
Category:Transcripts