Shenanigans: Episode 026

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==Recap==
===The King's Way===
The party are in Shenanigans. Dave Growl is performing on a stage. Tharik Crane goes to the bar to complain to Desmond about a Centaur, Charger, being allowed inside. Desmond explains how accepting Shenanigans is, the refers to Borch the Orcish Chef. Tharik Crane decides to keep his mouth shut and sit in the corner.
Desmond announces to everyone that Shenanigans will now be selling sandwiches, trying to seal business from King's Way, and says there will be zero negetive consequences. 
Then there is a protest group of Goblins outside of Shenanigans. They are protesting Shenanigans selling sandwiches. They are also throwing rocks at the tavern. Desmond asks the party to just relax, then he heads outside with Lizzy and Borch to deal with the protesters.
The party then notice a very tall & lanky Goblin (around 8 foot tall) enter the back door of Shenanigans flanked by regular goblins. He wearing very fight leather clothing. The Goblin Leader calls himself Jarred and says he is the owner of King's Way, and is here to get revenge upon Desmond. He then orders his goblins inside to destroy Shenanigans.
The Goblins begin to hammer pickles into the counter drop and spread mayonnaise on the walls. Jarred orders his Goblins to steal all the Knives inside Shenanigans to prevent Desmond making any more sandwiches in the future. They start to smash the furniture as well.
Charger goes to confront Jarred, but Jarred just punches Charger. Just before he falls unconscious Charger sees a Gold Ring with the King's Way logo on it.
===Entering the Labyrinth===
Charger wakes up in the middle of a pasture with an idealic steam flowing nearby. Charger then sees a basket with a baby Centaur inside in the steam, up against some reeds. Charger frees the baby from the bindings and lets them run free.
Then a magical vine wraps itself around a nearby tree. A flower appears, then is cut up from the inside by a sword, then Slade Milson cuts his way out. Slade explains who he is to Charger, and that he was eaten by a flower some time ago.
Then a giant green owl comes and grabs the centaur baby and flies away.
Joaquin Santamaria runs up to the party and doesn't recognise them, he is wearing lawyers clothes and carrying 2 briefcases.
After some introductions are made, Jarred appears in a tree branch and laughs at the situation. Jarred's leather clothes have become even more elaborate, now having giant shoulder pads. Jarred says he is the Goblin King and this is his realm. He says because Charge dared challenge him, he as brought him here to his realm, and has stolen Charger's inner child. Charger charges at the tree with his lances to hit the Goblin King, but it turns out to be a projection and not the real him.
Jarred explains in order for Charger to find the real, he will have to traverse the maze. The party can now see a vast maze beyond some fog. Slade points out that this is awfully like the film Labyrinth, and then Joaquin says he is suing Jarred for copyright infringement. Jarred says he will receive any paperwork in person, then phases away.
The party decide to enter the maze. At the entrance is Dave Growl, who seems out of sorts, unable to remember things clearly.
Charger tries to use his lance to let Slade Milson get a look over the wall. He sees 2-halfing sized people playing cards on the other side of the wall. Then a pair of oversized doors beyond them with a sign he can't read from this distance. There is also a Green Cat sleeping in the sunshine.
Dave Growl reveals he has a map and the party look at it. While the party look at the map, Dave begins to play his lute. The two people playing cards hear the music, merge to form the full sized Tharik Crane and head towards the entrance to see where the music is coming from. Tharik Crane doesn't remember any of the party. 
===The Riddle Doors===
The party enter the first area of the maze and approach the 2 oversized stone doors. Nearby is a sign and a sleeping Jade Cat made of literal jade. The sign reads: 
: Doors of Truth and Consequences:
: One Door Leads to peril, the other moves you forward.
: Which door speaks only truth and which only lies?
As Charger approaches the twin doors, a pixie flies over to Charger and tells him that the power to defeat Jarred is inside him, then flies away.
Charger knocks on one of the twin doors with his hoof, and the door complains he is scratching his paint. There is no paint on the door, so that door is the liar. The Jade Cat laughs at this and Sasses the party, saying they won't solve the puzzle.
The door on the left says his name is Henry. The door on the right says that is correct, his name is Henry. Tharik says if the 2 doors agree on something they are either both saying the truth or both lying. 
Charger asks the right door if it is a door, and the right door answers "No". Charger decides to open the left door. Tharik steps in, disappears into darkness, then falls down a pit. The pit is 5 feet wide. Tharik splits in half again, goes back-to-back, and shimmies up the wall.
The Jade Cat laughs more, it reveals the answer to the riddle: Which door speaks only truth and which only lies? Both of them! The party are fed up with the Jade Cat and decide to drop it down the hole. Charger throws his net at the Jade Cat, but it climbs the wall away from the party.
===Diamond Dogs===
The party continue onwards though the maze. The then encounter an illusion of Jarred the Goblin King again. Jarred congratulates the party on getting past the Door Riddle, and says he will seen minions after the party now, who will progressively get harder and harder. Jarred then disappears.
Then 2 Diamond Dogs made of diamonds then bound down the corridor and charge the party. The party defend themselves, with Tharik Crane turning into 2 people again. The party find the Diamond Dogs have ridiculously high AC. Charger throws a net over the Diamond Dogs, and one of the trapped Dogs is slain. Dave Growl talks with the other Diamond Dog, Ziggy, calling them a good boy, and convinces Ziggy to join the party.
Inside the other Diamond Dog is a Golden Hammer. Dave identifies it as a Jericho Hammer. Tharik tries using it on a wall, destroying a 10-foot section of wall, but it destroys the hammer in the process, creating a shortcut. The party moves onward. The Halfling Slade rides on the back of Ziggy the dog. 
===Wall of Hands===
The party travel thought he labyrinth maze until they get to a cliff with hands along the sides. Tharik attacks the hands instinctively and the hands berate Tharik for attacking them. Slade insinuates he had carnal relations with Tharik's mother and Tharik almost throws Slade off the cliff. The hands help the party down the cliff.
Halfway down the Cliff the hands try the guilt the party into painting their nails as payment. The party get to the base of the cliff and continue down the maze.
The party encounter Jarred again, now wearing a tuxedo. After taunting the party, Jarred summons a swarm of Jade Spiders.
The party try to talk the spiders out of attacking them. After failing a fight break out. Dave doesn't want to kill the spiders but Charger gives him the ultimatum, with us or against us, so Dave betrays the spiders and attack them as well. 
A spider knocks out Charger, but the party ultimately slay spiders and find another golden hammer. After using a healing potion Charger is back up. Slade then uses the golden hammer on another wall and the party continue onwards.
===Giant Tower===
The party arrive at a giant tower with doors built for giants. The party go inside the building. Inside are 40 foot tall giants sitting on a bench facing a TV. For the television set is a stage with a real alive Halfling held aloft by strings like a marionette, as he moves the ground changes and dragon turtles appear one of the giants controls the mario-nette to jump over the turtles and pits using a magical wand controller. Mario-nette is screaming in terror the whole time.
Charger calls out to the giants, and they reply a greeting, but don't take their eyes off the screen. They used to have 2 wands, but lost one of them. They say their friend Mark probably has the other controller, and Mark is a jerk who thinks he is better than them. Mark had called the 2 giants lazy. The giants however keep claiming to be conquerors. 
The way out to continue the maze is though another giant door on the far end of the room. The door however is closed and the party can't open it. Dave convinces the 2 giants to go an conqueror things in the real world, so they put on the magical armor and gear that Mark had made for them, open the back door, and leave. After the party save the gnome on the stage, they continue onwards though the labyrinth maze.
===The Town===
The party continue going though the maze and get to a clearing. As they get into the middle, four walls raise up around them. Slade uses his powers and breaks the 4th wall.
The party continue and arrive at the edge of the maze. They arrive in a town filled with shops and stands. A group of faeries run a herbal remedy store. They see the party and explain if they give Charger this potion (for 10 gold) they will find the power to defeat Jarred. The party buy the potion and Charger drinks it. The laxatives take fast effect and Charger released a torrent behind him. In the waste is also a golden ring with the King's Way logo on it.
Dave puts on the ring and tries to punch Charger with it, but it doesn't do anything.
The party head to Jarred's lair at the far end of town. Inside is a gigantic stone cavern with lava around. On the far side of the cavern is Jarred. The room magically changes into that of a chapel where Jarred and the baby Centaur is at the altar. The party charge in until Dave can feel the heat and realises it is an illusion and the lava is still there.
The party attack Jarred, but it all appears to have no effect. Dave then punches Jarred with the ring, which makes Jarred recoil. Dave then drops the ring into the lava and the illusion around them disappears. Jarred weakly claims that everything happening at the moment is original content and not copied from other places.
: "This IS Derivative" exclaims Dave, as he kicks Jarred into the lava.
Charger empresses his younger self and they merge back together.
===The Real World===
Charger wakes up and finds himself on the floor of Shenanigans. The rest of the party also wake up. Tharik his fed up with everything and storms out for a normal tavern. 
Shenanigans has been trashed and badly damaged. Desmond ends up tricking Charger into giving him over a hundred gold to pay for the repairs.
The party head out to get new tables made when they run into a group of refugees. Apparently 2 giants attacked Wikkthronrarenta and they are fleeing.
==Experience==
770 exp each
== Significant NPCs ==
* Jarred - The Goblin King, Owner & Manager of King's Way Sandwich Shop
* Jade Cat - Mocks the party
* Ziggy - Diamond Dog owned by Jarred convinced by Dave to join the party
== Significant Locations ==
*Bergshire - Shenanigans
Category:Shenanigans Episodes