Professor Blastoff References

Ep 01: "Welp, that's been podcast."
Ep 03: "Beep boop boop boop."
Ep 03: "Planetary exploration."
Ep 03: "I've written extensively on this subject."
Ep 03: "Hey there are good rectums here."
Ep 03: Poopy
Ep 04: I love ma babo
Ep 04: "Here's a ghost story. Along came a girl. Ehhhhhh!"
Ep 04: The voice of the rectum. "Finally, a break."
Ep 04: David's book 'I Just Thought of this Just Now: A book on whale jumping & karma.' Chapter Two: 'Names I'm making up on the spot'.
Ep 04: Guy-who-hopes-dogs-get-dressed-up-as-things is the best character.
Ep 04: "I'm bringing Nora Ellen back. Ye-ah!"
Ep 05: Kyle's coke bottle neck dream story.
Ep 05: "I immediately want cookies. I'm just so cute!"
Ep 05: Tig's tiny house dream.
Ep 05: Jens' dream about juggling slippery babies.
Ep 07: Deja vu, aka 'been there done that, girl'.
Ep 08: "We have sex with sheep."
Ep 09: First three riddles (dimensions & evolution).
Ep 09: Time traveling shoe.
Ep 10: Weird gypsy.
Ep 11: New lease on lice.
Ep 11: Baby Tig smoking.
Ep 11: Kyle has night terrors about being stuck in a curtain.
Ep 12: Kyle parachuting from a crashing plane. "See you later, suckers!"
Ep 12: Ghost hot dog.
Ep 12: The unlimited woo plan.
Ep 12: "I'm a ghost. Don't do that."
Ep 12: Jangling cheese.
Ep 13: The first time Aaron blames his computer for failing. 
Ep 13: First extended riddle (binary), second riddle about who knows what - cleaning? 
Ep 13: No 'That's Been Podcast'.
Ep 14: Inventor Kyle & the solar panel & watering system. 
Ep 14: Aaron is disciplined for his terrible clips for the first time. 
Ep 14: Exhausted fireman.
Ep 15: "Cool beer you've got there."
Ep 15: Obesity riddle.
Ep 16: It's time to wash your hair you. 
Ep 16: Cajun tunnel guy.
Ep 17: Mack truck toilet flush. 
Ep 18: Foreign relations riddle.
Ep 19: David's "Hey! I'm walkin' here!"
Ep 20: Kyle's dance floor erection.
Ep 20: Kyle's universe fancy dress costume. "You a faggot?"
Ep 20: Sexual attraction riddle.
Ep 20: Kyle's beach pick-up.
Ep 20: Kyle's fake party pick-up line.
Ep 21: Kyle's bear camping story.
Ep 22: Apartment goat farm.
Ep 22: Xmas meatball.
Ep 22: Food riddle.
Ep 23: Kyle's two window smashing stories.
Ep 23: Atomic bomb riddle (satin & leather).
Ep 23: Everyone just needs their own Zip.
Ep 23: Nanobots riddle.
Ep 23: Tig's sun gerbil snuggle sack.
Ep 24: Kyle old Jewish guy.
Ep 24: Kyle Miss America loss meltdown.
Ep 24: Knockoutball.
Ep 25: Existentialism riddle.
Ep 26: Kyle falls in love with a near-stranger.
Ep 26: Kyle buys flowers for anorexic girl.
Ep 26: David's stalker.
Ep 27: Big Bang riddle.
Ep 27: Brocklesnitch riddle.
Ep 28: Paul F. Tompkins' notebook.
Ep 28: Tig & Kyle's first recorded fight.
Ep 29: David Suntsberger.
Ep 29: Tig attempts a Pangea riddle. Marty attempts an atheism riddle. Kyle riddles too.
Ep 29: Kyle's Irish letter.
Ep 29: Blastronauts.
Ep 30: Innocent adult penises.
Ep 31: Tig's Xmas tree obstacle course.
Ep 31: Kyle's teacher round kicks and bats a penisicle.
Ep 31: Overcome fears by going cross-eyed.
Ep 32: Prince Petergood riddle.
Ep 33: David sets up the girl he likes with his best friend.
Ep 35: What's nuts?
Ep 35: Ocean riddle.
Ep 35: First ever jazz note.
Ep 36: Both noses/Double blood.
Ep 36: Cheating riddle.
Ep 37: "Swamp rock? You kiddin' me?"
Ep 37: Green Circle Award winner.
Ep 37: Sustainability riddle.
Ep 38: Nail clipper suicide.
Ep 39: New thoughter kids.
Ep 39: Nooth otter.
Ep 39: Germophode.
Ep 39: Carrie & Tig fight.
Ep 39: Kyle's first Spanish definition & riddle. "The dog is not in us."
Ep 39: Spanish swamp rock.
Ep 39: "Welp, that's been Blastoff. Nope."
Ep 41: Vietnam flashback flatulence.
Ep 41: Kyle finishes a fan's riddle about nothing in particular.
Ep 42: Kyle gets aids and goes to a Billy Joel concert.
Ep 42: Kyle finishes a fan's riddle about I'm-not-sure what.
Ep 43: Kyle does the kip-up, hurts something, then does the caterpillar.
Ep 43: David was molested by his babysitter (touching tongues).
Ep 43: Tig's potato recipe. 
Ep 43: Tig doesn't need a computer - she has a butter churner.
Ep 43: Wonder Woman had to bring her boobs when she ran around.
Ep 43: Tig's pickle sandwich.
Ep 43: Kyle calls Mother.
Ep 43: Kyle should've been an abortion.
Ep 43: Swamp rock ring tone - "Ding-a-ling a-ling, your mother's calling to talk about your abortion."
Ep 44: Kyle's baby wranglers.
Ep 44: Baby Kyle gets his junk caught in a bike wheel.
Ep 44: Tig acts like a woman poorly.
Ep 44: Spanish riddle, David translates on the fly.
Ep 45: Latin Grammys acceptance speech.
Ep 45: Swamp rock guy shows his level of enlightenment.
Ep 45: First SNL opener?
Ep 46: "You look beautiful" kid.
Ep 46: "I am so happy!" kid.
Ep 46: Turkey.
Ep 47: Kyle's concussed.
Ep 47: First main Aaron wrangle?
Ep 48: Tig's wisdom tooth story.
Ep 48: You just got Tigged.
Ep 48: Microbe riddle.
Ep 48: Giggles.
Ep 48: What's up with that? What's up?
Ep 48: Kyle's first fan email.
Ep 49: First glimpse of Native American Indian guy.
Ep 49: Perception/mushroom riddle.
Ep 49: Fan riddle (Kyle rhymes parent with apparent).
Ep 49.5: Kyle calls mother re: niceness.
Ep 50: Kyle's hotel hot tub.
Ep 51: 'I love you wife.'
Ep 51: Genes riddle.
Ep 52: Most depressing podcast ever number one.
Ep 52: This oughtta (otter) be a good time.
Ep 53: Kyle shows Tig his basketballs.
Ep 53: Mother makes Kyle pick up girls at the beach.
Ep 53: I love wife.
Ep 53: Aaron's VIP song.
Ep 53: Butternugget95 tweets.
Ep 53: Riddle that takes minutes to complete.
Ep 54: Tig makes everyone listening for a second time cringe by joking that she may only have a year left. This is pre-cancer diagnosis.
Ep 54: Mother thinks Kyle's calves are perfect.
Ep 54: Tig & Kyle fight.
Ep 54: ALL the voices.
Ep 55: Ms Locker room. "I'll have you know my wife can get in and out of any room!"
Ep 55: Apple tuba guy panicked all on his face. Huba Tubeman.
Ep 55: Music riddle comp.
Ep 55: Music improv.
Ep 55: Here comes the flute part!
Ep 56: David's beach poop. (09:00)
Ep 56: "You might be knittin'."
Ep 56: "Quit needling me!"
Ep 57: Snook and pasghetti.
Ep 57: Kyle's all-whites at the gay pride parade.
Ep 57: Here and also there.
Ep 59: Kyle & Tig's fight gets physical.
Ep 60: American Indian guy.
Ep 60: Deiter.
Ep 60: Quark riddle.
Ep 61: Kyle's fat lumps & Sarah's poor couch.
Ep 61: C-Diff riddle.
Ep 63: The second in the saddest-podcast-in-the-world trilogy.
Ep 63: Kyle gives flowers to all the ladies.
Ep 64: The third in the saddest-podcast-in-the-world trilogy.
Ep 65: The fourth in the saddest-podcast-in-the-world trilogy  (yes I know what a trilogy is).
Ep 65: One of the best Aaron intros.
Ep 66: Riddle about lumen or something.
Ep 66: Amy, while Aaron is speaking about Star Trek: "Quit trying to fuck me and Tig."
Ep 67: Wop on the geep?
Ep 69: Kyle's bad C-Diff riddle.
Ep 70: Extended Jewish guy riff.
Ep 70: Kyle's dog bite & puppies.
Ep 70: Aaron's intro music starts (In previous episodes, but aired out of order so this is the time it started).
Ep 70: "I've got a ham!" (31:40)
Ep 71: Kyle's jokes saved the world from Planet Gleeblop in 2022.
Ep 72: Cancer free!
Ep 72: Kyle scraped his knee and had a bad gig at Nickelodeon.
Ep 72: Morbot.
Ep 72: Cure-all spaceship drawing.
Ep 72: "Oops! Someone just bought my album." - Aaron.
Ep 73: Kyle's THC poisoning. "This is ground."
Ep 73: Childhood memories including Tig's tiny house dream.
Ep 74: Aaron on his own.
Ep 75: Ducky takes an elevator ride.
Ep 75: Al Gay-ore.
Ep 76: Tiny calves, beach poop and the wig.
Ep 76: Mrs Trump.
Ep 76: Native American Indian, Al Gay-ore & Ronald Reagan chat.
Ep 77: "Because she was smiling."
Ep 79: Xmas song - "Iiiiiiiiii'm alooooooone!"
Ep 79: First Punky reference.
Ep 79: Tig asked you a question, just answer the question - The introduction of Abel Wimplebaum.
Ep 79: Elmo debates Abraham Lincoln, then shoots him in the head.
Ep 79: First ever 'Happy Birthday Dan'.
Ep 80: Lil' Tig can't always get what she wants.
Ep 80: "Don't you fugaboo."
Ep 81: "Because they were smiling" back story.
Ep 81: NY shooting.
Ep 81: Kyle's brother-a-cop.
Ep 81: Chief Big Meat.
Ep 81: Brain riddle.
Ep 82: Del La Rue went to the overseas (Staten Island).
Ep 82: First time Kyle says Punky in different ways.
Ep 82: Elephant talking clip randomly starts. When it does start, the elephant speaks Korean and no one knows if it's good or not.
Ep 83: "Karen! Kyle!" "What?"
Ep 83: Kyle forces Aaron into a riddle.
Ep 84: "Hey guys I'm gonna be going to bed in like 10 mins."
Ep 84: Command N for 'knobs'.
Ep 84: Craig does stand-up.
Ep 86: Janeane Garofalo fanboys over Kyle.
Ep 87: Kyle's lisping professor.
Ep 88: Kyle's niece messages about Daniel Radcliffe.
Ep 88: Exciting texts.
Ep 88: Del La Rue talks about his age and 'the Japs'.
Ep 88: Del La Rue's shower-spray tack penis.
Ep 89: "Somebody get me a mic." - Tig.
Ep 89: The reluctant hero.
Ep 89: Kyle's niece and boring texts part two.
Ep 89: Happy birthday Dan's.
Ep 89: Subtext Punkys.
Ep 89: Kyle stands by his Punky.
Ep 90: Poop in a jar.
Ep 90: Sventska hunkens bunken. Hunkas be bunken.
Ep 90: Tig wouldn't let Kyle put his finger on it.
Ep 90: But what about meeeeeeee?
Ep 90: Santa Cruz mother of twins sticker.
Ep 90: Conehead Old Butthole.
Ep 90: She-pac (Ms. Pac-man).
Ep 90: First mention of 'Name That Punky'. Audience gives punkies.
Ep 90: Mortifying the girl that brought in the valentine.
Ep 90: Boring texts.
Ep 91: Dave Hill's nephew in karate: "How are cars made?"
Ep 91: Homeless lady Santa Claus story.
Ep 92: Running topless up a mountain.
Ep 92: Star Wars riddle.
Ep 93: Tig & Kyle's love making on the bunk beds.
Ep 93: A hat on a hat.
Ep 93: She-who.
Ep 93: Cookies? Bakies? Broil them on a rack at 450 degreesies?
Ep 94: Best bit ever in America - Kyle's AMAZING mall food bit.
Ep 94: You can't love two people at once because the bible says "You can put it in a woman..."
Ep 94: She-who.
Ep 94: High-pitched Foxworthy.
Ep 95: How 'bout now how 'bout right now?
Ep 95: That's a toughie.
Ep 95: Calculated review - not even mathematical.
Ep 95: Email from THE happy birthday Dan.
Ep 96: First game of Name That Punky in its 'proper' format.
Ep 96: Don't taint the Punky.
Ep 96: Neck and neck Punkys.
Ep 97: First use of Name That Punky theme music.
Ep 97: Punky corns.
Ep 99: Kyle's nostrils. 
Ep 99: Phone-a-Judy for Name That Punky.
Ep 100: Kyle comes out as a rosacea sufferer.
Ep 100: Kyle speaks Spanish (De bonk de bus).
Ep 101: The introduction of Wagonhini guy.
Ep 101: Laughing public toilet pooper letter.
Ep 102: Iguana gonna wanna.
Ep 102: Go gay off somewhere else.
Ep 102: Kyle's Batman cups.
Ep 102: Space knight - "Gotta get away. Gotta get away. Uh! Uh! Uh!"
Ep 103: Here comes the Tig part.
Ep 103: Girl you're doin' too much.
Ep 103: Oh Pumpy.
Ep 103: Spanish riddle translation.
Ep 104: First chicken parking station attendant bit.
Ep 104: Real estate novelist.
Ep 104: Elton John's seamstress.
Ep 104: It's just Kyle's way, he's a little shy.
Ep 104: Is you or is you not a hound dog?
Ep 104: Kyle's mum helps him hit on a nurse, then get tap shoes made.
Ep 104: Mouth is free.
Ep 105: Aaron's postcard to Mommy.
Ep 105: Kyle & Tig have been banging.
Ep 105: Talcing Punky.
Ep 106: Keeping a points score for good jokes.
Ep 109: Kyle's mom gave birth to his calves way before the rest of him. His nostrils slowed him down.
Ep 109: Whispers were about it.
Ep 109: The invention of the Punky rental system.
Ep 110: "Oh Carol I'm sorry!"
Ep 110: Anna's vagina fingers.
Ep 111: Kyle's drunk.
Ep 111: Jon Dore streaks.
Ep 111: Tig's rebel mama - kids on the hood of the car.
Ep 112: Tig doesn't know what embarrassing is.
Ep 112: "Mother says I move well."
Ep 112: Kyle does ballet.
Ep 112: Shout outs to Hugh Janus & Neil Strokemycock.
Ep 113: Tig gets into sex shorts, goes down a water slide & jumps on a trampoline.
Ep 113: Tig can tell Jaden is Asian because of his tiny little eyes.
Ep 113: Kyle's faultless first date move (switching the lights off).
Ep 113: Aaron's advice to making moves (cookies & smile kisses).
Ep 113: Kyle humiliates Tig & they fight about it.
Ep 114: Kyle sleeps with an Alaskan hoarder.
Ep 114: Impractical uses for space weather.
Ep 115: Birds fly with feather arms.
Ep 115: Trump swap - the most luxurious frogs. It's terrific.
Ep 116: Kyle thinks his tax guy would be in his hotel in Quebec.
Ep 116: Ed Asner mouse.
Ep 116: Schmucking the salamanders.
Ep 116: Kyle's raccoon infestation.
Ep 116: Underwater wigs are never fun.
Ep 116: Diarrhoea pool & foot.
Ep 117: What are you getting paaaaaaaaid motorcycle.
Ep 117: We forgot to say goodbye to Kaka and Fred.
Ep 117: Spanish Eckhart Tolle riddle.
Ep 118: Kyle's pubes on his distended stomach.
Ep 118: This is like frogs in Australia problem.
Ep 118: Tiggleby & her aids-ridden kitty.
Ep 118: Endless hat man from the past.
Ep 118: Acapella girls. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do.
Ep 120: Cows wanna know.
Ep 120: Creedence is not in a good concert now.
Ep 121: Go go Gadget faggot!
Ep 122: Stephanie Allynne is Angelina Wells.
Ep 125: Night guy.
Ep 126: Matter riddle.
Ep 127: Kyle kills a man with his car, gives his family a 'lil quilt.
Ep 127: Lil' quilts.
Ep 127: Epic wrangle from Tig & Kyle.
Ep 127: Tig would love to.
Ep 127: Redneck blues.
Ep 128: Kyle's mother does film reviews for the first time.
Ep 128: Pooping (wash your mouth out!).
Ep 128: Crotch five.
Ep 129: Lil' outfits.
Ep 129: "I'M Baby Bear."
Ep 129: 1980s digital ringtones.
Ep 131: Double dizzy.
Ep 131: Tig is really good at scooting.
Ep 131: Tig's person song.
Ep 131: Lil' outfits continued.
Ep 131: Judge puppy.
Ep 131: Kyle's raccoons (second telling?).
Ep 131: Human hands!
Ep 131: Hans Berger.
Ep 131: Heep. (He-sheep)
Ep 131: For example.
Ep 131: You can eat any species that doesn't have human hands.
Ep 132: Teach. He's so cool. He smokes 'n' shit. (32:45)
Ep 132: Amelia Earhart flew around the world in nineteen eight. (34:20)
Ep 133: Blue whale tells dirty knock knock jokes.
Ep 133: It's a no P zone on 'rofessor Blastoff.
Ep 134: Salty Tig/Greenroom Tig.
Ep 134: Lil' Davey Huntsberger: The Musical.
Ep 135: General Vague.
Ep 135: Blue whale returns with the dirty jokes.
Ep 135: Tig does Kyle's voices.
Ep 136: Punch out Teach.
Ep 136: Mandela's 'speech'.
Ep 136: Sleep gal.
Ep 136: Ever so slight horsey things.
Ep 137: Snouting.
Ep 137: An unironic ham is hard to find.
Ep 137: I've got a hacky ham!
Ep 137: Muffy, the white trash from one of the highest class counties in the area.
Ep 139: Accent-less racial skit.
Ep 139: Couldn't think top shelf thoughts.
Ep 139: Seinfeld also couldn't think top shelf thoughts.
Ep 139: "Are you single, ready to mingle, or in a relationship heading for fayshionship?"
Ep 139: Memory 'poem' (riddle).
Ep 139: Teach teaches.
Ep 141: Garage sailing.
Ep 141: What are you gonna do, just trample around looking inside pots?
Ep 141: Hemaphrodemurs.
Ep 141: Hersband.
Ep 142: Kyle does Joan Rivers and (the worst) Maria Bamford.
Ep 142: Vegan Nut Cake: The Professor Blastoff Story.
Ep 142: Kyle's feature film 'Chip Off the Ol' Block'.
Ep 143: "That's Kyle Dunnigan and that's Tig Notaro and that's David Huntsberger. And this is Professor Blastoff."
Ep 143: You just think your meat and bones around.
Ep 143: Researcher or researchim.
Ep 144: First of all, congrats.
Ep 144: Tig scares everyone into getting cancer checks.
Ep 144: Scuttleback.
Ep 144: Teach!
Ep 145: Kyle is late (again).
Ep 145: Tig churns butter under the bar.
Ep 145: David does all of Kyle's voices.
Ep 145: The thing about Tag...
Ep 145: Tig is from a real old fashioned.
Ep 145: David tries to make Kyle cry.
Ep 145: Crockpots. Chili. Soups.
Ep 145: Jacquelyntop.
Ep 145: Teach smokes.
Ep 146: Blackjack Blackjill Whitejill.
Ep 146: "If Mimi Kim's out front putting up balloons, I'm screwed."
Ep 146: Aaron's last show. :(
Ep 146: Aaron was taken down by a clove of garlic.
Ep 146: AIDs in a Bush: A Young Boy's Struggle.
Ep 146: Kyle runs us through Meditation with Mother.
Ep 147: Kyle wants to get more horny as the show goes on.
Ep 147: Aliens are per-thetic.
Ep 147: It takes three grim glops to put in a light bulb.
Ep 147: Kyle creamed on his left boob.
Ep 147: If I had come and speaken for the first time.
Ep 147: AS - Above Scuttle.
Ep 147: Flo's anus was cemented.
Ep 148: Tig No-vice-o.
Ep 148: Shit dating stories (literally).
Ep 148: Kyle's pageant baby adoption.
Ep 148: Kyle's adoption process is mostly stick.
Ep 148: toyboattoyboattoyboat.
Ep 148: Front turtle - turtlin' from the front.
Ep 149: Tootsie-off.
Ep 150: Has Tig ever tried the double milkshake in the bedroom? How about the Tennessee whiplash? Or the Oklahoma stranded cowboy?
Ep 150: Gals love a double milker.
Ep 150: Kyle's move is inviting a girl over, then playing the computer game 'Boner Attic'.
Ep 150: Judy Dunnigan meditation.
Ep 150: Death rattle whinny.
Ep 151: "That's been 'I'm in Love' with Tig Notaro."
Ep 151: Plastic Ants/Can'ts/Cannots.
Ep 151: Kyle cried when he was nominated class clown in school.
Ep 152: Beautiful harmonies. 'Everyone went high.'
Ep 152: 'I think it's about cats.'
Ep 152: Mutilation flirtation.
Ep 152: 'Can I tell you something? You remind me of a little cat.'
Ep 152: Nice little nostrils, big nose.
Ep 152: 'I'm old!'
Ep 152: Big boobs, a sweet rack & nice tatas is all Kyle is looking for in a woman.
Ep 153: Poop stories. Tig tells urban legend of woman pooping in new boyfriend's apartment: the toilet doesn't flush, and she locks herself out.
Ep 153: Rich Louie (C.K.).
Ep 153: Kyle ate canned spinach slime because Popeye did.
Ep 153: Domino voice - 'It's doing it!'
Ep 153: 'Hello, Cars 'n' Things, I'm a man.'
Ep 154: Him-he-ys!
Ep 154: David does drunk Titanic guy.
Ep 154: David does inflatable disasters salesman.
Ep 154: Beautiful scuttlebacking.
Ep 154: #diarrhea
Ep 155: Massage stories.
Ep 155: (Sings) 'Here you go, that's your hmm, watch her go.'
Ep 155: David can't do musical theatre.
Ep 155: Introducing monster Anna. She went to the mall the other day.
Ep 155: The Quackerback. Tebow can't throw bread to ducks. Also, can't throw duck to bread.
Ep 155: Is he (Tebow) playing for football teams?
Ep 155: Running of the Hun.
Ep 155: Kyle is great at sharing sports stories.
Ep 155: Kyle's new character thinks it's great when people go to Vermont. His name is Warren Vander Vander (aka Mr. Everynowandthen) and he lives in Dayton, Ohio.
Ep 155: Listener call-out to Aaron Steamy Meats.
Ep 155: "We're talking about gay sports and Renaud's got the steamy bottom."
Ep 156: Tig's a drug addict.
Ep 156: Good jokes have layers and zingers, just like the 'Kyle's nutritionist' bit.
Ep 156: A bloodied Rottweiler came by with no releash.
Ep 156: Another Kyle childhood molestation story.
Ep 156: Kyle is look up into the stars for his best friend Jesus (worship jams).
Ep 156: Why would you do that to Karen Obermiller!?
Ep 156: In year eight, Tig started the process of turning a guy into a leopard man.
Ep 156: Hipsters are hip to the jive. They don't like things that are whack. They boogie down to the giddy up on the dance floor.
Ep 157: Kyle & David flirt valley girl style.
Ep 157: 'It's this Italian dish called nanayabiziness.'
Ep 157: Kyle's fascinating TV story.
Ep 157: 'Is that how you eat your gluten? Tiny on the end of a spoon?'
Ep 158: Kyle makes up many beautiful tracks, including a new Professor Blastoff (The Professor Show) theme.
Ep 158: Tempo meter map three times fast.
Ep 158: The Fast and the Furiouses - Too Fast For Speed: Pull Over & Go Potty.
Ep 158: Batman & Robbers.
Ep 158: The story about Lil didn't end well.
Ep 158: The Huddlecuffs.
Ep 159: 'Nice long neck, dude. Dad a swan? Mum a snake?'
Ep 159: Night Guy is dead.
Ep 159: Tig is Betty Carrotsnonions.
Ep 159: Kyle does an AMAZING Australian accent.
Ep 159: Kyle eats about eight meat flaps a day.
Ep 159: 'We just did improv? I think I hate improv.'
Ep 160: Kyle reverse-psychologies Neil deGrasse Tyson.
Ep 160: Kyle has had a lot of gas, he's not doing any drugs.
Ep 160: 'The appropriate amount of gas is three farts a day. I think we all know that.'
Ep 160: Kyle beats the meat multiple times a night.
Ep 160: 'Get that moon theory off this table this instant! It's crawled right up there! I'm eating brisket!'
Ep 160: 'It was on Kona.' 'O'Bria?'
Ep 160: Mary did a bachelor on moon.
Ep 160: 'merica moon.
Ep 160: 'Great buffoonary, Mary!'
Ep 160: 'As someone that was able to pull Wikipedia up on my computer, I'm gonna go ahead and say no.'
Ep 160: 'Moonvin' along.'
Ep 160: 'Mooning.' 'That's not knowing about the moon!'
Ep 160: Mary, a.k.a. Moon 101.
Ep 160: 'I wish you could go - and not just astral project - but if it were possible, just go hang out on the moon for just a little bit with no one else around, just kind of gather your thoughts.' 'Yeah that would be mind blowing.' 'That'd be so fun.' 'Just for, like, 15 minutes?' '15 minutes, I just need to get to the moon real quick, just sit there.' 'Gather my thoughts. I will get back to you on whether or not I'm gonna be able to meet you in New York for that weekend.'
Ep 160: 'Happy moon position to you, happy moon position to you...'
Ep 160: 'Professor Blastoff, where we will Google things for you.'
Ep 160: The breath of life, the hiccup of charm. Mother meditations.
Ep 160: 'I didn't mention this earlier, but I think the moon is my friend.'
Ep 161: Kyle spent an entire cruise hanging out with an old couple because he looked like their dead son.
Ep 161: Night Guy lives!
Ep 161: I've got a man!
Ep 161: Firetruck tears.
Ep 161: couldn'tthinktopshelfthoughts worldkidschamp.
Ep 161: JW vs. Mormon arm wrestling.
Ep 161: Mormons were tooken off the list.
Ep 161: Kyle's no-thoughter church.
Ep 161: David had sex out of turn.
Ep 161: Kyle's female pilot was crying at the wheels.
Ep 161: A cult seems like you grow a beard, hand-me-down.
Ep 161: Jazz note topshelfthoughts.
Ep 162: Fart gene.
Ep 162: You can't tangyou with one Tig.
Ep 162: 'David seems knee-deep in the lesbian information. I think lesbians go everywhere.'
Ep 162: 'Reading Rainbow's coming back. I think that's pretty cool.'
Ep 162: 'Can you grab ****?'
Ep 162: 'Please stop grabbing my giggle.'
Ep 162: The food purse talk show.
Ep 163: 'Sorry about that pop.' 'No problem, ma.'
Ep 163: Kyle's fucked-up positive affirmation exercises.
Ep 163: This is kitties!
Ep 163: Hedonic treadmill. Ooor she-donic.
Ep 164: 'You're black and I'm white, why can't we get along?' Kyle's version of Ebony and Ivory.
Ep 164: Kyle doesn't like black people and if Tig paid attention, she'd know that.
Ep 164: Once, twice, three yards a Tiggy.
Ep 164: Mommy's little handsome boy.
Ep 164: Diablo's 144 book reports.
Ep 164: 'You've got a kicking beaver!'
Ep 164: 'You'll stay and I'LL harmonize!'
Ep 165: Tigglejudge.
Ep 165: Lil' Davey Kittypaws.
Ep 165: Sing-off.
Ep 165: Tiggleby and the snuggle bed.
Ep 165: The bubble throat episode.
Ep 165: Kyle shows off his mad Spanish skills.
Ep 165: Kyle's young Spanish teacher is inappropriate.
Ep 165: Kyle's beautiful love song.
Ep 165: Defining love.
Ep 165: Kyle's vlog 'Where is She?'
Ep 165: 'Caught you, you gay!'
Ep 165: Kyle finished the poem David was quoting.
Ep 165: David says foot rubbing is internments.
Ep 166: The cat that did something earlier on America's Funniest Home Videos.
Ep 166: Tig went out with a guy that is now Kelly Clarkson's bassist.
Ep 166: David talks to spiders.
Ep 166: Kyle's Jew chops.
Ep 166: Johnny Carson and Zsa Zsa Gabor stop by. 
Ep 166: 'He's gonna be so excited to meet us!'
Ep 166: Hamdom.
Ep 166: 'Stacey was not s'posed to know!'
Ep 166: 'I you and us we.'
Ep 166: Shin scrape!
Ep 167: Inconthevable!
Ep 167: (Sings) 'Walk personality, talk personality, divide personality.'
Ep 167: Personalable.
Ep 167: 'You've got to meet Tig. She has the perfect personality.'
Ep 167: Cool hunch.
Ep 167: David would J all over your parade.
Ep 168: 'My mother's arms are so wild, if she got rid of them she'd be mute. Good night. It's just me, four-year-old Tig. I'm gonna go have a cigarette, hit the sack.'
Ep 168: 'You can flub up your words.'
Ep 168: David's rap - 'I went to a thing'.
Ep 168: Kyle raps with his body.
Ep 168: 'Let's turn on our juicers!'
Ep 168: Radio song intros.
Ep 168: 'It seems like it maybe has to be!'
Ep 168: 'Produced by Jim Roach, please...'
Ep 168: 'Dogs are boys, cats are girls. I just can't get over that.'
Ep 168: Google with it.
Ep 169: Some bacteria with a cold.
Ep 169: 'Don't tell me to go to image!'
Ep 169: 'That's a good impression of someone who can't hear.'
Ep 170: 'Are you made of muffins? ARE YOU MADE OF MUFFINS!?'
Ep 170: 'Aah Tiggleby be ticklin' me!'
Ep 170: 'I was a very horny young man.' 'Ew.'
Ep 170: 'He can't be friends with coral! Am I right you guys?'
Ep 170: 'I can't have any more Dr. Phil talk!'
Ep 170: Two fingers of blueberries.
Ep 170: 'Use your genitals. That's what I'm saying.'
Ep 170: Meatsacs.
Ep 170: "Oorrrrever young! I ont to be orrrever young.'
Ep 170: Cowboy ham.
Ep 171: 'You're a real lolly farter, aren't you?'
Ep 171: 'Should we check in with the profess-' 'CONSCIOUSNESS.'
Ep 171: 'Move finger, meat finger.'
Ep 171: Creepo!
Ep 171: Kyle's suicidal sex robot (and eggs).
Ep 171: My Arm or My Lady.
Ep 171: Mickey Mears at Disneyland.
Ep 172: David & Kyle are in Tig's top 50 friends, but not in the top 20.
Ep 172: Kids with only one good eye.
Ep 172: Tig in a Blanket, the homeless-people-in-coats foundation.
Ep 173: The Bill Cosby episode.
Ep 173: David's just mad about Kyle's nuts.
Ep 173: Welcome to our pawscat.
Ep 173: 'Genitals, you have been reassigned!'
Ep 173: Autism on the playground. You get it when you can.
Ep 173: She's very successful writer.
Ep 173: Handshakes. Smiling. Appropriate tickling. Sharing food. Winks.
Ep 173: 'Hey, don't sit on the Asians.'
Ep 174: 'I have the worst thirds in the whole podcast.'
Ep 174: 'Two Chelsea Handler Books Put Together' by Tig Notaro (or Chelsea Handler).
Ep 174: Kitchy Tig trinklets.
Ep 174: 'Am I higher or lower?'
Ep 174: Kermiddy Cartoon Network.
Ep 175: Olive and the rice cake create drama.
Ep 175: (Sings) 'We're gonna eat some food and have our dogs bark.'
Ep 175: Olive gets miked.
Ep 175: 'What's mortar!?'
Ep 175: 'It's good it's good.'
Ep 176: Beep boop boop boop hey Hey HEY!
Ep 176: (To your baby bump) 'There's a weird guy in the elevator with us.'
Ep 176: Let's read from the book of tumors.
Ep 176: (In a Jewish accent) 'Why would you do this to your poor Asian mother!?'
Ep176: (In a Jewish accent) 'Oh boy I love to use chopsticks when I eat my rice food.'
Ep 176: Tiggle tell you.
Ep 177: 'Hard to love and nine-year-old. Tig?'
Ep 177: 'Did you ever make out with your sister as a kid?'
Ep 177: 'So a lot of stick figures get ripped up.'
Ep 177: 'Whoa! That's faster than the DMV!'
Ep 178: High energy, bad attitude.
Ep 178: Boba Fett's Italian friend.
Ep 178: 'Kristen's going to ignore Lily when she jumps.'
Ep 178: 'I love magic!'
Ep 178: Tig, David & Jen join Kyle's body band.
Ep 178: 'A modern woman is best known for her boobs & her soup.'
Ep 178: 'I piggybacked that chicken.'
Ep 178: 'Worksops!'
Ep 178: 'Don't tell her exactly where it is. Just send her in that direction.'
Ep 178: Tig's boobs got a lot of action and that's what caused the breast cancer. Too many boob swats.
Ep 178: 'Scuttleback and don't swat your boobs.'
Ep 179: It turns out Kyle is God.
Ep 179: Tough Tig & Sweetie Petey.
Ep 179: Kyle gives Pete a lot of life advice with his body.
Ep 179: Pete raps with his body.
Ep 180: 'Ain't No Sunshine' body rap.
Ep 180: 'Look at me.'
Ep 180: 'Say something of substance.' 'I just woke up.'
Ep 180: You developed breast cancer one week ago in your hand.'
Ep 180: 'Burf heef hufhufhufhufhuf.' (Horse noises, obviously)
Ep 180: 'Oh you were playing stick throw.'
Ep 180: Tragic ending (the beloved Robin Williams).
Ep 182: Kyle dabbled in gay for like 15 (17, 18) years.
Ep 182: M. Night Shamalamadingdong.
Ep 182: Jimmy Parsi does not book nabisco.
Ep 182: Jimmy hates cooking food.
Ep 182: 'You wanted a passionate topic? Get rid of fantasy baseball - that's an effing snooze. Let's talk about cooking food.'
Ep 182: 'So he's sneaky in his mind.' 'Like an Asian!'
Ep 182: 'Come on, give me something for rice paper!'
Ep 182: 'When you sit down, you sit on yourself. Whoops! That's myself.'
Ep 182: 'Anything else on this table? That cup of diarrhea?' 'No I've got no problem with that.'
Ep 183: 'There's nothing better than a little kitty paw.'
Ep 183: 'This is what I smell like inside.'
Ep 183: Marc: 'I don't believe I'm cynical. I think I'm relatively objective and a little aggravated.'
Ep 184: Grandma Smelly-In-Her-Panties.
Ep 184: Tato-ing nerf herders.
Ep 184: Kyle's brain in bed: 'Don't do that.'
Ep 184: Kyle's minimal CO2 rap.
Ep 184: 'Whatever you're born, stay that way! Love Professor Blastoff.'
Ep 184: Kyle Dunnigan - Best high school actor in his high school.
Ep 184: Ivan Carlisle.
Ep 184: Tig's a regular at the queef clinic.
Ep 184: Pretty Little Baby. Block Walker. Fart Barterer.
Ep 185: Tig is taking the permanent wave's side.
Ep 186: Seamt.
Ep 186: 'Is there a chance horse hoof smoke came out of my body during the surgery?'
Ep 186: 'If you need a sabbatical, come work in my lap!'
Ep 186: 'Nobody put Baby science in a corner.'
Ep 187: Kyle wrote an amazing stuff-in-eye bit.
Ep 187: 'It goes both.'
Ep 187: Kyle auditions with himself. 'Daddy Mac, Cuddly Wuddly, Sugar Tits.'
Ep 187: 'I'll show you weird! I've cuddled sober!'
Ep 188: Hippies and nap buddies.
Ep 188: 'Give your girlfriend the mic. Are you smart?'
Ep 189: Serial meets The Wire.
Ep 190: Womammal.
Ep 190: Stephanie created a job - The Organiser of Chairs & Space.
Ep 190: 'What else are circles?'
Ep 190: 'We already talking about... Okay... Snacks and your diaper...'
Ep 190: 'Time flies when you're in a diaper.'
Ep 191: 'When you were born, you came out like the cutest little chicken.'
Ep 191: Judy body raps!
Ep 191: MOTHER does a MOTHER meditation. The best mother meditation of all!
Ep 191: Olive eats constantly.
Ep 191: 'THIS IS YOUR NOTE. YOU'RE UP HERE.'
Ep 193: 'Are you licking your stinkies? You licking your stinkies?'
Ep 193: 'Yeah, boss.'
Ep 193: 'Feel the calm as your berries meet your twig.'
Ep 193: 'I was acting.'
Ep 194: Aaron tolerates Lake.
Ep 195: Elf and pokier things.
Ep 195: David's girlfriend asks if she's permitted to take a shower.
Ep 195: Can Tig talk about her su-su-su-su-success?
Ep 196: 'You're really getting serious about getting a date, aren't you?'
Ep 196: yousaidsquattypottynow
Ep 196: Put your head in her toilet.
Ep 196: 'Squatty potties rock. Also addiction isn't good. Also imagine a girl taking a poop on your face.'
Ep 196: All amoligies.
Ep 196: Beef chickens.
Ep 196: 'Looove addict! She's a looove addict!'
Ep 197: Rustle the buffalo.
Ep 197: Greg picks up any girls at 3pm every day.
Ep 197: 'So Australia's a continent.'
Ep 197: Tig Daddy.
Ep 197: 'Once there was a girl who had her second period... LUNCH ROOM.'
Ep 198: 'The key to beating this guy is knocking his wheat mask off.'
Ep 199: 'But I've cured diseases and helped children and I was pecked to death by ducks!?'
Ep 199: Pecked to death by Duck Girl.
Ep 199: 'His arms went up like "ow, my neck."
Ep 199: Mowwy Wingwald.
Ep 199: 'Are you listening Gordon Lightfoot?'
Ep 199: 'Are you listening Pope Francis? And Molly.'
Ep 199: Pope Francis' Christmas party. 6pm to question-mark.
Ep 199: The most stressful and annoying Professor Blastoff recording ever. (123dot123dot123dot123)
Ep 199: Off-mic money talks.
Ep 199: 'We're atoms. Let's touch 'em.'
Ep 199:That's our Najji.
Ep 199: 'Who's Aaron?'
Ep 200: 'So there's no hyphen?'
Ep 200: Seven-year-old Molly Ringwald ate a whole watermelon.
Ep 200: Fourteen!
Ep 200: 'I can rap backwards.' 'You just inhaled!'
Ep 200: Legitimate kitty paws.
Ep 201: Tig's got her TOP! HAT!
Ep 201: Tig's ears look just like Ellen's.
Ep 201: Rebecca is Tig's third-tier friend. If she died, she'd be sad in a third-tier way.
Ep 201: 'Sincerely - a real one.'
Ep 201: Lil Kicks.
Ep 202: Stephanie is totally down with solitary confinement.
Ep 202: Giraffes are benefiting from dating.
Ep 202: 'Hey nice man's shirt.'
Ep 202: 'Where do you like to go that makes you feel great?'
Ep 202: 'I don't think rape is funny either.'
Ep 202: 'This is not Professor Rapeoff.'
Ep 203: Kyle does yoga and a lot of tea ceremonies.
Ep 203: Dog airline!
Ep 203: 'He sounds like he's in a lot of pain.'
Ep 203: 'Everyone's always masturbating with my penis.'
Ep 204: Tig's 41th birthday card.
Ep 204: Christ School, the Christian musical.
Ep 204: 'Yeah I don't want my baby to be beaten more than once.'
Ep 204: 'Hey Kyle, does your arm hurt?' 'Nah-ny.'
Ep 204: David topped Kyle's nanny joke.
Ep 205: Lola was a nightclub. She would do cha cha.
Ep 205: Kyle's butt's gay, but he's not.
Ep 205: Angst-ridden teenage scrawny Kyle singing Phil Collins to his reflection.
Ep 206: Blastin' m'lats.
Ep 207: 'When I leave Vegas, I just make a giant circle back to Vegas.'
Ep 208: 'That's why you don't fly over the ocean.' We weren't over the ocean. 
'...and I think I want her to die with me.' '...Oh god.' 'I don't think that's the coolest.'
Ep 208: 'Rhys how many generations until there will be water people?'
Ep 208: 'Battitude is the way bats would act.'
Ep 208: Bubonic = Powerful boobs.
Ep 208: 'I'm feeling really good about bubonic.'
'What a plague.' 
'Oh great, now I've got perfect boobs.'
'Yeah Tig you've got that bionic, guuuuurl.'
Ep 210: Judy gets texts about her bottom.
Ep 210: A man wants to get excited with Judy's bottom.
Ep 210: David isn't noteable on Wikipedia.
Ep 210: 'I could probably TJ Maxx just by looking at your bottom.'
Ep 210: Kyle: 'David from the podcast is MY David.'
Ep 210: 'We've narrowed it down to either a man or a woman.'
Ep 210: 'I love my Kyle. And I like you a lot David. I'd love you if I knew you more.'
Ep 211: Margee from the bear story!
Ep 211: 'Do you or do you not have fart squiggles?'
Ep 211: Punky!
Ep 211: Finally getting to Tig's answers on football pile-ups.
Ep 212: Tig peed her pants on a motorcycle.
Ep 214: 'Get off my turkey neck.'
Ep 214: Christ High: The Musical. 'The best time to talk about Christ is after school.'
Ep 214: 'If anyone can bring black holes back, it's you.'
Ep 214: 'I feel like you're saying old people should kill themselves.' 'No, not all of them...'
Ep 215: 'Tell me something. Did he ever kill a rooster?'
Ep 215: 'Lonely people - you will know us by the trail of bear hugs.'
Ep 215: 'Welp, that's been my part.'
Ep 216: Del la Rue and Peter Pippy Five.
Ep 216: Del was well-endowed, but it shrinks up into a little button as you get older.
Ep 216: Del has crevices in his anus-taint area.
Ep 217: 'New beginnings, old endings.'
Ep 217: The death of the professor.
Ep 217: 'David I feel you're moving into listenable material right now.'
Thanks for everything Tiny Calves, Beach Poop & The Wig.
xx Ria.
@riacastlemead
Category:Professor Blastoff