Adventures in Babysitting

Date/Timing: setting up for "Dictionary"
Setting: Team Vulcan Specter suite, The Shed; Vaucluse, AUS
Inspiration: an ALC comment on "Dictionary"
Notes: Now merges the comment!fic "A Twist" and "Dictionary"
.
Jamie bows at the door to the marshal's office. "You asked to see me, ma'am?"
"Yes." Xiong puts down her pen. "You remember my daughter, Fei Yen?"
"How could I forget such a cutie?"
Fei Yen gives him a toothy smile.
"Fei Yen, this is Officer Walker of /Vulcan Specter, he-him-his. You met when you were a baby."
"Waller," says Fei Yen.
"'Walker', that's me!" Jamie crouches. "And who's this?"
Fei Yen hugs her bunny close. "'utu!"
"The Rangers Jones will be looking after Fei Yen and Yutu until afternoon tea."
Jamie blinks.
"Is there an issue, Officer Walker?"
"When Nguyen described this job as 'babysitting', I didn't think he actually meant small humans."
Xiong concedes, adds, "Nguyen's version rarely involves small humans, it's true." Something not unlike a smirk peeks from the corner of her mouth. "This is a twist of mine and Fei Yen's."
"I am so f-ducking glad I'm not in Hong Kong anymore."
"Perhaps you'd like to send your Rangers back?"
Jamie chuckles, "One of 'em would probably appreciate the change of scenery." Offers to lift Fei Yen. "Ready to meet your new sitters, cutie?"
Fei Yen nods, climbs into his arms.
"Myself or Officer Lo will collect her from the Rangers at tea time."
"I'll let the boys know."
"Thank you, Officer Walker," purrs Xiong.
The back of Jamie's neck tingles, but he bows, turns—
Fei Yen leans around him and waves to the Marshal.
—and saunters out.
"Jones tipets?" asks Fei Yen.
"Jack and Logan are Rangers and brothers, like Lin Chao and Feng, but not twins /or triplets—" Grins. "—though Logan and Feng /act like mismatched twins."
Fei Yen's brow furrows.
"It's kinda hard to explain."
"Wogan is bunny like Feng?"
"Is Logan like a bunny like Feng?"
"No, is Wogan—" She flails the arm with Yutu, grinning madly, then holds back on. "Bunny." 
"Funny!"
"I say'd it."
"You /did say it: is Logan funny like Feng." He snickers, squeezes her leg. "In his own way." Climbs the steps to the Team Vulcan suite. "Here we are!"
She claps and bounces. "Tipets!"
Jamie pushes open the door, calls, "Got your next assignment for ye~!"
"What's that?"
"This? This is a baby."
"Fu—"
Jamie presses the munchkin tighter—
Munchkin squawks.
—to his chest, covers their exposed ear. "Oi! Little pitchers!"
Logan rolls his eyes.
"This /particular baby is Fei Yen, the Marshal's daughter, and, for the next two hours, you're babysitting her."
"You're kidding, ay?" Jack crosses his arms.
"Nope."
"This some kinda test?" Logan crosses—winces, sulks.
"Nope."
"Can't you do it?"
"That 'babysitting' clause in my contract refers to you guys and covers actual children only if the baby in question is /your spawn. The Marshal's offspring—" Hefts the kid. "—is a different matter entirely."
Mini-Marshal giggles.
"What about Andrea?"
"Nope. Marshal's orders. Down you go, sweetheart." Jamie plunks his bundle of Mini-Marshal in front of them.
Mini-Marshal shrieks, barrels straight at Logan—
Logan stumbles backward, trips over his own feet, hits the floor.
Jack steps in front, crouches-and-scoops—
—squeals and climbs Jack's jumper, digging little feet into his ribs—
—winces. "Could ye ...?"
—streeeetches over his shoulder—
Jamie snickers.
Logan counts his breaths.
"Uh, sweetie, could you please—"
—wiggles loose from his grip, leeeeeeeans—
「Settle down, bean.」 Logan uses the couch to haul himself up. 
Mini-Marshal freezes, eyes locked on Logan.
Logan blinks at Mini-Marshal.
"What'd ye say to her?"
「Triplet speaks Cantonese!」 squeals Mini-Marshal.
"Nothin'," grumps Logan. 「Yea, I do.」
Mini-Marshal throws out short arms. 「Triplet carry me!」
「Sorry, can't. Broken arm.」
Mini-Marshal pouts mightily.
Logan ducks his head.
Mini-Marshal's lower lip trembles.
「Umm ....」 Logan glances around. 「How—how 'bout you help us play video games?」
「Games!」 cheers Mini-Marshal, clapping.
"Park her on the couch, Jack."
Jack does, sits down beside her. "What're we—?"
"Gaming." Logan flops down on Mini-Marshal's other side.
Mini-Marshal tucks up under his good arm, coos.
"Well, looks like you have this under control. Marshal or her PA'll—"
Logan shifts uncomfortably.
"—be by to collect her for tea. Later, gents!" With a wave, Jamie saunters off.
"Soooo ... what game did you have in mind?"
""May I recommend /Sunshiney Rainbow Friends' Adventures in the Kingdom of 'Gineer?"" offers AGNIS.
Logan rolls his eyes.
"Wainbow Fwiends!"
"There's a game?"
""Of course there's a game. What self-respecting media property /doesn't have a game?""
"She's gotcha there, Jack."
"WAIN-BOW FWIENDS!"
""A Cantonese audio track—""
Logan groans.
"What's your problem?"
""—is available and may increase Mx Xiong's chances of success.""
"Okay, okay," grumps Logan, "start the fuckin' game."
""Language, Ranger.""
Logan cringes, looks at his limpet. "If your mum asks, I said 'ducking'."
Mini-Marshal nods earnestly. "Tipets wike duck-kulings."
Logan relaxes.
""Now loading,"" drawls AGNIS. ""This game uses a tablet for avatar control. You will find one under the detritus on the coffee table.""
Jack grunts, wiggles it loose—sets off a crapalanche—passes it to Mini-Marshal.
The theme song plays.
"/Wainbow Fwiends!" squeals Mini-Marshal.
Jack and Logan sigh.
Mini-Marshal pokes and squeaks and swipes—by the middle of the second level, she's also oozed into Logan's lap.
Logan huffs.
「Tickles!」 giggles Mini-Marshal.
Logan sighs.
「/Tickles!」
"Stop bothering her," grumbles Jack.
"I'm just /breathing. Christ."
Jack scoffs. "Why don't you sit on my lap, sweetie?" Smiles winningly.
"Nu-uh." Mini-Marshal keeps with the swiping.
"'parently, I'm better with the ladies than you," smugs Logan. "Not that it takes much."
"Fuck you."
""Language, Ranger.""
Jack winces.
Logan makes a face at him.
Jack glares back.
Logan snickers.
「Tickles!」
Logan rolls his eyes.
Mini-Marshal burbles happily, character skipping along the screen.
Jack rubs his neck. "Um, sweetie? I think you should climb that tower on the right and get that doodad."
Mini-Marshal runs her avatar /right past.
"I really think you should—"
"Jack, leave her alone. She's doing fine."
Mini-Marshal preens, collects a bunch of on-screen thingamabobs.
"But don't you think—"
"No," says Mini-Marshal—
Jack sulks back into the cushions.
—pulling off a triple jump to the top of a cascade of molten gold and a pocket watch's worth of doodads. She cheers.
"Guess she showed you," says Logan.
Jack flips him off.
""Language, Ranger,"" scolds AGNIS.
"I didn't say anything!"
""Your message, though conveyed nonverbally, was inappropriate for your current company.""
Jack slouches lower.
A combat roll and Mini-Marshal's character lands on a palette suspended from a whirling crane. 
"You're really good at this," marvels Jack.
Mini-Marshal beams.
"Too good," mumbles Logan.
Sunshiney Rainbow launches into the end-of-level victory song.
Mini-Marshal sings along.
The tune wobbles to an end and a cut scene plays.
Mini-Marshal stabs 'pause', narrows her eyes at Logan. 「Petal sounds like you.」
Logan sighs. "Because that's my voice."
Mini-Marshal goes starry-eyed. 
"What?"
「You're a Rainbow Friend!!!」 she shrieks, throwing her arms around his middle.
"Oi! Easy! Broken arm!"
Mini-Marshal peels herself away. "Sorry, Petal."
Jack snickers.
"Knock it off, Jack."
"Seriously—" Jack snorks. "—Spectral—"
"Don't even—"
"—you dubbed the game, too?"
"Lost a bet," Logan mutters.
""I thought it was because you wished to impress—""
Logan loudly clears his throat.
"Oh, really~."
"Fuck—"
""Language, Ranger,"" chides AGNIS.
Logan growls, does /not tear at his hair.
「Wogan is a Rainbow Friend~!」 sings Mini-Marshal as she restarts the game.
Jack doubles over, wheezes.
Logan thinks /very loudly about that one time in that one bar in Seoul when—
Jack chokes, turns a really unpleasant colour.
Logan smirks.
Jack glares, snarls, "I fuckin—"
""Language, Ranger.""
Jack growls, /does tear at his hair.
Mini-Marshal, though, absolutely /crushes levels three through five; Jack and Logan watch with something like amazement.
「「New high score~!」」
- 1. Fei AGN -
「You /helped her,」 accuses Logan in Kiang-Che.
AGNIS responds in kind. 「「Is that a problem?」」
「'course not,」 Logan scoffs. 「Just wanted you to admit it.」
「「Congratulations. You must be so pleased with your investigative prowess.」」
Logan rolls his eyes.
The doorbell chimes.
Jack pushes off, opens up. ""Oh, uh, hello, ma'am.""
「Mummy!」 Mini-Marshal scoots off Logan's lap and runs up to Xiong, cursing happily.
Jack cringes.
Logan shtumps over.
Xiong smiles, scoops Mini-Marshal up. "Did you pick that up from your new sitters?"
"Yup!" beams Mini-Marshal in lovely English.
"And did you pick up why it's inappropriate?"
Mini-Marshal shakes her head, twists around, blinks at them.
"Gentlemen," says Xiong. "Care to explain to my daughter why that language isn't appropriate for a child?"
"It's, uh," says Jack, "very—"
"Rude!" stammers Logan.
"And children should be polite—"
"Especially to their parents."
"Why wude?" asks Mini-Marshal.
"Because ...."
"They're not very nice words."
"Dey're not nice?"
"Umm," says Logan.
"The dictionary!" shouts Jack.
"The dictionary says so!" adds Logan.
"So you shouldn't say them."
Mini-Marshal's brow furrows. "Tipets do."
"We're dumb," says Logan.
A deeper furrow. "Tipets."
Logan looks to Jack.
Jack swallows, hunches his shoulders.
Logan shrugs. "We're dumb, not-nice triplets and you don't wanna be like us."
Jack nods fervently. 
Category:Ficlet
Category:Sydney Shatterdome (setting)
Category:Cultural Exchange
Category:Logan
Category:Logan's POV
Category:Logan (ficlet)
Category:Jamie
Category:Jamie (ficlet)
Category:Fei Yen
Category:Fei Yen (ficlet)
Category:Jackson
Category:Jackson (ficlet)
Category:Xiong (mention)
Category:Nang (mention)
Category:Andrea (mention)
Category:Sunshiney Rainbow Friends (reference)
Category:AGNIS
Category:AGNIS (ficlet)
Category:Xiong's (cruel) unusual punishments
Category:Ficlets with images
Category:Comments
Category:Ficlets with comments
Category:Ficlets with merges
Category:Ficlets (incorporated)