Patrick Star Wars

Patrick Star Wars is an episode of The Silly Adventures of Patrick Star.
Part 2: The Farce Awakens
== Transcript ==
(Pat Starwalker is sleeping on a rock in the middle of a desert planet when the robot Squidroid lands on the planet, waking him up.)
Pat Starwalker: Hello.
Squidroid: Do you know where I can find Obi-Wan Krabnobi?
Pat Starwalker: You bet I do! He runs my favorite restaurant: The Kelestial Krab!
Squidroid: Kelestial Krab? But "celestial" makes the soft "s" sound, not the hard "k" sound that would give such a name an alliterative appeal.
Pat Starwalker: I don't understand a word you just said! Come on!
(Pat Starwalker and Squidroid go to the Kelestial Krab, where Obi-Wan Krabnobi is handing out Krabby Packets.)
Pat Starwalker: Yum! Packets of processed, non-perishable food items! Just like mommy made them.
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Squidroid! What are you doing here?
Squidroid: Princess Sandra sent me here with a message.
(Squidroid presses a button on his chest, and a hologram of Princess Sandra pops out.)
Princess Sandra: Obi-Wan Krabnobi, I need your help.
Pat Starwalker: Wow, that princess is tiny!
Princess Sandra: The evil Darth Planktor is holding me captive, and he won't release me until you come and fight him!
Pat Starwalker: Don't worry, tiny princess! I'll save you!
(Pat Starwalker jumps into a spaceship parked outside.)
Pat Starwalker: (from inside the spaceship) Ooh, what does this button do?
(The spaceship explodes. Obi-Wan Krabnobi and Squidroid rush out of the Kelestial Krab and see an ash-covered Pat lying down where the spaceship once stood.)
Pat Starwalker: (coughs) Did I save the tiny princess?
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: No, but you did blow up me ship!
Squidroid: How will we acquire another spacecraft on such short notice?
Pat Starwalker: You use a lot of big words.
(A large, pineapple-shaped spaceship lands behind Pat, and SpongeSolo walks out of it.)
SpongeSolo: Man, I cannot wait to try out another Krabby Packet!
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Hey, can I borrow your ship?
SpongeSolo: What's in it for me?
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: (holds out a Krabby Packet) Free Krabby Packet?
SpongeSolo: (takes the Krabby Packet) Fine, but I'm driving.
(SpongeSolo, Obi-Wan Krabnobi, and Squidroid walk onto SpongeSolo's ship.)
SpongeSolo: So, where are you headed?
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: The Death Bucket.
SpongeSolo: Really? Okay, it's your funeral.
(A hairy snail slithers out of another room.)
Squidroid: What is that atrocious thing?
SpongeSolo: That "atrocious thing" is Garebacca, my snookiee.
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Snookiee?
SpongeSolo: Yes. It's a cross between a snail and a wookiee.
Garebacca: Merowrowrow.
Pat Starwalker: Hey, do you know where the bathroom is?
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: When did you get here?
Pat Starwalker: A couple seconds ago.
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Well, un-get here!
SpongeSolo: Too late. We're lifting off.
(SpongeSolo flies his ship to the Death Bucket.)
SpongeSolo: This is as far as I'll go. You three do what you're going to do, and I'll be back in an hour.
Voice: Leaving so soon?
(Darth Planktor appears behind SpongeSolo, startling him.)
SpongeSolo: Darth Planktor, sir! I was just escorting Obi-
Darth Planktor: Yeah, I know what you were doing.
SpongeSolo: I'd love to stay, but I've gotta feed Garebacca.
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Besides, you were here to fight me! Leave my friends out of it!
Pat Starwalker: You consider me a friend now?
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: No. (to Planktor) You can have that guy.
(SpongeSolo and Squidroid go back into SpongeSolo's spaceship.)
Squidroid: I'm so worried about my master!
SpongeSolo: Chill out. He'll be fine. Wait, where's the pink one?
(Pat Starwalker is walking through a Death Bucket hallway when he notices Princess Sandra in a prison cell.)
Pat Starwalker: Hey, you're the tiny princess from before!
Princess Sandra: Are you here to rescue me?
Pat Starwalker: No, I smelled some roast beef... I mean, yeah! I totally came to save you!
(Pat Starwalker rips off the middle two bars of Princess Sandra's prison cell, and she walks out.)
Princess Sandra: Thanks.
Pat Starwalker: Why were you locked up?
Princess Sandra: Because I've been fighting against Darth Planktor's Galactic Chumpire with Obi-Wan Krabnobi.
Pat Starwalker: Really? Obi-Wan Krabnobi is fighting Darth Planktor right now!
Princess Sandra: Where?
(Obi-Wan Krabnobi is having a lightsaber duel with Darth Planktor on the roof of the Death Bucket.)
Darth Planktor: Face it, Obi-Wan Krabnobi! You lose!
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Not yet I haven't!
(Darth Planktor knocks Obi-Wan Krabnobi's lightsaber out of his hand and shoves his own lightsaber through Obi-Wan Krabnobi's chest.)
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Now I lose.
(Pat Starwalker and Princess Sandra run up to the roof just as Obi-Wan Krabnobi falls.)
Princess Sandra: No! You'll pay for this, villain!
(Darth Planktor picks up Obi-Wan Krabnobi's lightsaber and throws it through Princess Sandra's chest.)
Princess Sandra: Never mind. (falls)
Pat Starwalker: Tiny princess!
(Pat Starwalker takes the lightsaber out of Princess Sandra's chest and engages in a lightsaber battle with Darth Planktor. Pat Starwalker knocks the lightsaber out of Darth Planktor's hand then forces him to the edge of the roof.)
Darth Planktor: Wait! I am your father!
Pat Starwalker: Really?
Darth Planktor: No.
(Darth Planktor grabs the lightsaber Pat Starwalker is holding and turns around, throwing Pat Starwalker off the roof.)
Darth Planktor: Thank goodness this breathing suit comes with lightsaber-resistant gloves!
(Pat Starwalker tumbles right into SpongeSolo's ship.)
SpongeSolo: Good thing I got back when I did!
Pat Starwalker: SpongeSolo, it was horrible! Obi-Wan Krabnobi and Princess Sandra...
(Obi-Wan Krabnobi and Princess Sandra come out of another room.)
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: What about us?
Pat Starwalker: You're alive? How?
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: I rescued Princess Sandra before you did, and using a Jedi trick, I made clones of us to keep you and Darth Planktor occupied as we rigged the Death Bucket with explosives.
Pat Starwalker: Wait, what?
(The Death Bucket explodes.)
Pat Starwalker: I never got to find that roast beef.
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Perhaps it was for the best.
SpongeSolo: Wait, keep him and Darth Planktor occupied? (points at Pat) How did you know he wasn't with us?
Obi-Wan Krabnobi: Because if there's anything I know about him, it's that he knows how to get lost.
(Everyone except Pat Starwalker laughs.)
Pat Starwalker: I don't get it.
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