Uncle Sam

is a Primary weapon introduced in the 1776.07.04 update. It can be obtained from participating in the first 2020 presidential debate.
==Description==
So as you know, 2.2 million people modeled out, were expected to die. We closed up the greatest economy in the world in order to fight this horrible disease that came from China. It’s a worldwide pandemic. It’s all over the world. You see the spikes in Europe and many other places right now. If you notice, the mortality rate is down 85%. The excess mortality rate is way down and much lower than almost any other country. And we’re fighting it and we’re fighting it hard. There is a spike. There was a spike in Florida and it’s now gone.
== Appearance ==
Uncle Sam himself wears a suit and hat in the theme of the American flag, he also has a grey beard. He wields a large machine gun and a grenade launcher at the back with the American flag strapped to his back.
==Performance==
When the fire button is held down, Uncle Sam will fire his machine gun for freedom and liberty, fuck yeah. 
When reloading, Uncle Sam will point at you and says you have been drafted to invade Iran for oil, fuck 
== Strategy ==
Dear Nephew,
Your two lovely uncles have been killed by a drone strike accidentally ordered by me. Oops! I sincerely hope you aren't too mad at me, included is a digital download code for Minecraft™. Also go check out www.minecraftmods.com for some sweet mod packs. My personal favorite is "Too Many Items”, it's like you're playing creative mode on survival.
Sincerely,
Barack Obamus
=== Tips ===
* Johnnie , get your 🔫 
 * Get your 🔫 , get your 🔫 
 * Take it 🔛 the run 
 * 🔛 the run , 🔛 the run 
 * Hear them 📲 , you and me 
 * Every son of liberty 
 * Hurry right away 
 * No delay , go today 
 * Make your daddy glad 
 * To have had such 🅰 lad 
 * Tell your sweetheart not to pine 
 * To be proud her 👦 ' s in line 
 * Over there , over there 
 * Send the word , send the word over there 
 * That the Yanks are coming 
 * The Yanks are coming 
 * The drums rum tumming everywhere 
 * So prepare , say 🅰 prayer 
 * Send the word , send the word to beware 
 * We ' ll be over , we ' re coming over 
 * And we won ' t come 🔙 till it ' s over , over there 
 * Johnnie , get your 🔫 
 * Get your 🔫 , get your 🔫 
 * Johnnie show the Hun 
 * Who ' s 🅰 son of 🅰 🔫 
 * Hoist the flag and let her fly 
 * Yankee Doodle do or die 
 * Pack your little kit 
 * Show your grit , do your bit 
=== Counters ===
*️⃣ 🇺🇸👥 to the ranks 
*️⃣ From the towns ➕ the tanks 
*️⃣ 🛠️ your 🤶 🥲 of ➡️👤 
*️⃣ ➕ the 🧓 🔴, ⚪️ ➕ 🔵 
*️⃣ Over there, over there 
*️⃣ 📦️➡️ the word, 📦️➡️ the word over there 
*️⃣ That the 🇺🇸👥 are ⤵️ 
*️⃣ The 🇺🇸👥 are ⤵️ 
*️⃣ The 🥁 rum tumming everywhere 
*️⃣ So prepare, 💬 a 🤲 
*️⃣ 📦️➡️ the word, 📦️➡️ the word to beware 
*️⃣ We'll be over, we're ⤵️ over 
*️⃣ ➕ 👥⬅️ ❌️ ⤵️ 🔙 till it's over, over there.
== Attributes ==
* Automatic
* Damage Boost
* Knockback
== Supported Maps ==
* 
* 
== Weapon Setups ==
My so-called 'mother' was just a plant by the CIA to hide the fact that I was created inside of a highly experimental super-soldier laboratory where they put tracking devices inside my body so that they could collect me on my 44th birthday and perform an autopsy to determine if the experiments were successful. Little does Uncle Sam know that I'm two steps ahead and I had my brain removed by my Pappy on my 43rd birthday! Take that, Feds!
==Changelog==
;1776.07.04
*Initial release.
==Trivia==
* This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US department of energy.
* I then took a shower in the clean water provided by the municipal water utility.
* After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC regulated channels to see what the national weather service of the national oceanographic and atmospheric administration determined the weather was going to be like using satellites designed, built, and launched by the national aeronautics and space administration. I watched this while eating my breakfast of US department of agriculture inspected food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the food and drug administration.
* At the appropriate time as regulated by the US congress and kept accurate by the national institute of standards and technology and the US naval observatory, I get into my national highway traffic safety administration approved automobile and set out to work on the roads build by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the environmental protection agency, using legal tender issed by the federal reserve bank. On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to be sent out via the US postal service and drop the kids off at the public school.
* After spending another day not being maimed or killed at work thanks to the workplace regulations imposed by the department of labor and the occupational safety and health administration, enjoying another two meals which again do not kill me because of the USDA, I drive my NHTSA car back home on the DOT roads, to ny house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and fire marshal's inspection, and which has not been plundered of all it's valuables thanks to the local police department.
* I then log on to the internet which was developed by the defense advanced research projects administration and post on freerepublic.com and fox news forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can't do anything right
==Rigs==
*M60 - Cinema Hanwil
Category:Weapons
Category:Heavy
Category:Automatic
Category:Joke Weapon
Category:Damage Boost
Category:Knockback
Category:Themed