Letter From A Suicide

I know this is not a good time to write a letter, but I had to, I'm not starting too well, if someone has found the letter meant that I have killed himself, but I know that no one will be found because I did not care no one, no one to realize that I was born, there should be born wished I had died and not have suffered in this way, the way in which I suffered, and I felt.
Why? I want to kill myself, because I'm an idiot who can not raise their problems, and has no value for anything, I'm a coward, think of me what you will, but at least I have my reasons right?, Why? I feel guilty about what I'll do.
I think there should have been born, and all they tell me, I also I would tell myself many times, even my mother told me she did not want me brought into this world, and if your mother tells you that it's true Do not?, my mother always hated me I have not done anything bad to say, but says if it were not for my not have many fights in the house, my parents a few months divorced ago, my father left my, my mother and my brothers, and my mother always me it has thrown up, as if he had done it, I do not fault that my father was an idiot, so of course I say, he married another woman, my mother but has brought me to this world is crazy, in that I look like her, who prefers to spend money on drinks, drugs and snuff, which feed their own children, who wanted to have it, because I do not I decided.
I was born in the apartment of my house, because you had no money, and two because she preferred her drunk before me, you believe it, as it can be so horrible mother, my mother let me drink, smoking and drug me to ten years and also remember, prostituted me for money, but she all the money was only used me as a sexual tool, when my father was would buy alcohol, but when he left I had to steal me because if not, would not let me in the house or hit me for no reason.
Before you had siblings, an older brother and a younger sister, but do not ask me what happened to them, my brother and I one day when we were playing together, I killed him playing, so not I told anyone, so far not care much about the truth, buried in the garden, and it is amazing that nobody noticed ever, and said he disappeared and did not know where I was, my mother did not care much, even a little, do not call the police and followed so quiet, as if he had not had a child in his life, made as if only I had two children, and my sister drowned in the bathtub, not even that I did, and since then was an only child.
I studied when I was ten, and I was in a school where I was expelled because he was homosexual, and the director did not like it to be, which is not a disease be, homosexuals have done nothing wrong to be judged, sent to prison or even be discriminated against by society, doctors are studying homosexuals, like a contagious disease to others stick only to approach the person, then they took me to another school who insulted me by saying things such as bitch, fucking or fat, in fact he was not, and my young and young age was anorexic, anorexic guy was weird because they were almost always the girls who were, so stop eating and I was staying bones, I could tell even the veins, people were staring at me, like a freak, and I wanted to be a normal bug, we like all the paleolithic world not even know what that means, and when Im' asking people tell me things I did not understand the craziest u can think through your head, I said all, mocked me, I pushed on purpose, and was rejected by society, one day some friends in my class I was raped and beat me by look like a woman and being gay once done that I went to my house, and when my mother saw me in that state with very cracked face was bloodied, scarred and look seasoned, and torn and dirty clothes.
My mother called the director, who hated me indeed, and wonder what has happened to me to get done some foxes so to speak, and night, the director who swear that killed him, as they see again, told my mother very true that was aggressive and had hurt a few of my colleagues, it was the other way around but hey, the director advised him to take me to boarding school, and that made me take to boarding school at that site degenerates pass it fatal, I was forced to clean, cook, I left without eating, sexually abused me, beat me to have fun because there was no reason, they laughed at me and pointed, and one day I was tired, I escape.
Then, after a while, I started doing drugs and drinking alcohol, and I looked for another host family, but not if for better or for worse, it was a nice family, a mother who cared for her children, a father I bought everything u wanted, and older than me son, who was an only child, I thought handsome and do not know why, it was very good and friendly, I fell in love without hesitation, the evil of his parents was always working, and at night, u feel just being an only child, five years later, I was fifteen, I finally got to second of the E.S.O, when youre in high school u think is eternal, and makes u go slower day, one day I and my brother we were alone, the truth is that I do not remember much, but if anything, I began to kiss on the lips, did not know why, but I did not take me from him, I wanted to continue with I wanted to do me, put me on his bed and kept kissing me, I started playing the body and told me he wanted me, he wanted me only for him and I never away from him, he was only with him, I believed everything I believed everything he told me, he always made me smile anyway, always succeed, and then want to know what happened, went to bed, the next morning, he did not remember anything what happened, I knew that everything I said yesterday was a lie, our mother, so to speak because it was not my real mother just treated me like part of the family, came to our room, and he said to come room, also used an excuse that we were, although it was not real, I gave him a kiss on the mouth, and he said, "let him alone" and not return it has lead the word, had lost the love of my life, it was my brother, I remember also he told me he was sick.
Sorry to bore you dear readers, surely no one is reading this, goodbye forever, after taking my life, I will remember as the whore who slept with his older brother for money, and the coward fled, kiss carefully from Drew Ryan Scott, and thank you for everything you did me suffer, now is not anyone cares.
And if I you want, really, I do not want you to cry for me, I want it to be a happy and fun funeral, and think that I am around you, in everything around you, in your hearts, get me with joy in your hearts, and think I'm in heaven, with angels holding me and looking after me, and if you cry is do not care about me.
Category:Fan Fiction
Category:Letter
Category:Suicide
Category:Drew Ryan Scott
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Category:Varsity Fanclub
Category:Letter From A Suicide
Category:Fanfics created by Terri Daniella Fiss
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