Transcript:Horrid Henry and the Killer Boy Rats

[Henry plays the Killer Boy Rats' song 'Gonna be a Rockstar' at full volume in his room, causing the furniture in the sitting room to rattle]
Dad: [thumps the ceiling with the end of a mop] Turn it down, Henry! 
Mum: [bangs on Henry's bedroom door] Henry, turn it down!
[Inside Henry's bedroom, he and Fang are jamming to the song]
Horrid Henry: 'cause that boy on the stage will be me! [poses on his bed like a rock star] You've been beautiful!
Mum: [opens Henry's bedroom door] And you've been horrid, Henry.
Horrid Henry: [gasps] What time is it? The Killer Boy Rats are performing live on TV tonight! [runs downstairs]
Mum: [sighs] I hate that band.
[Downstairs, Dad is trying to remove the mop handle which is stuck in the ceiling]
Horrid Henry: [runs in and turns on the TV] Yes!
Gordon's Dad: And we have breaking news. Ed Banger has today left the Killer Boy Rats.
Horrid Henry: What?!
Dad: [still trying to remove the mop] Good riddance, that's what I say.
Gordon's Dad: Ed has decided to pursue singing and I quote, 'nice songs'.
Horrid Henry: Nice songs?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
[The title card appears. When the episode resumes, Mum is outside hanging out the washing and humming 'Buttercups and Daisies']
Horrid Henry: [emerges from his fort] Mum!
Mum: But I thought you liked Ed Banger.
Horrid Henry: Not when he's singing nice songs!
[In the sitting room, Peter is playing Buttercups and Daisies on his cello]
Horrid Henry: [opens the door] Slime, slime! Squishy, squishy slime! [Peter sticks his tongue out at Henry] I saw that, worm.
[In the driveway, Dad is cleaning the car engine and whistling Buttercups and Daisies]
Horrid Henry: [growls] Not you as well?!
Dad: [bumps his head on the car bonnet] Ooh! I thought you liked Ed Banger.
Horrid Henry: Well you thought wrong!
Dad: Oh, that's a shame, because we're all going to see him tomorrow night. I've got front-row tickets.
Horrid Henry: What?
[The scene changes to Ed Banger's concert the following evening]
Ed Banger: # Buttercups and daisies are flowers I like #
(Perfect Peter, Mum, Dad and Prissy Polly together) # Buttercups and daisies are flowers I like #
Horrid Henry: [takes his Killer Boy Rats mask off] Can you believe I'm having to sit and listen to this? It's just not fair! [stands up] Dad, I need the toilet.
Dad: [sighs] Alright, Henry. [Henry gets up, but stops and stares at Ed in disbelief]
Ed Banger: # Hyacinths, chrysanthemums... #
Dad: Come on Henry, I thought you needed the toilet?
Ed Banger: # These are the flowers that I love to see. These are the flowers that make me happy. [Henry has had enough. He puts his mask on and stomps onto the stage] Make me so very happy #
Horrid Henry: [grabs the microphone] Slime, slime! Slimy, slimy slime! [audience gasps]
Dad: Don't be horrid, Henry!
Horrid Henry: Slimy, slimy slime! Slime, slime, [the security guard rushes Henry off the stage] Slimy slimy slime! [Ed Banger looks glum]
[The scene changes to the next morning, where Dad is telling Henry off for ruining the concert]
Dad: I have never been more embarrassed in my life, Henry!
Horrid Henry: [sighs] Yes, Dad.
Dad: You are never, ever to do anything like that again!
Horrid Henry: No, Dad. 
[The phone rings and Dad answers it]
Dad: [sharply] Hello?
Caller: Please may I speak to... [inaudible]
Dad: Yes, he's here. [hands the phone to Henry] It's for you.
Caller: Hello, Henry?
Horrid Henry: Uh, yes?
Caller: Manager of the Killer Boy Rats here.
Horrid Henry: [suddenly interested] Oh?
Killer Boy Rats Manager: We heard about your little escapade at Ed's concert.
Horrid Henry: Yeah?
Killer Boy Rats Manager: And we want to audition you for the band.
Horrid Henry: YEAH?
Killer Boy Rats Manager: Yeah, two o'clock today at the crooked corner. You gonna be there, Henry?
Horrid Henry: Yes!
Killer Boy Rats Manager: [hangs up] Well, he certainly sounds stupid enough to be in the band.
[Upstairs, Henry is sitting on his bed, daydreaming about his future as a rock star]
Horrid Henry: No more school! No more wormy worms! No more Moody Margaret. Ah, it'll be fast cars and even faster food for me from now on. I'm gonna be a rock star, Fang! Ha, what do you think about that? [Fang grunts and turns away from Henry, who realises someone else will have to look after Fang. Henry gets an idea] Come with me, Fang. [Henry knocks on Peter's bedroom door carrying Fang in his cage] Peter?
Perfect Peter: Go away!
Horrid Henry: But I've got something for you.
Perfect Peter: [opens the door] You're not going to slime me again, or... or peg me out on the washing line.
Horrid Henry: Hmmm... it's tempting. [Peter shuts the door, but Henry stops it with his foot] It's Fang. I want you to look after him.
Perfect Peter: What?
Horrid Henry: Shhh!
[Henry closes the door and gives Fang to Peter]
Perfect Peter: He's your hamster. You've got to look after him. [Peter looks at Fang, who snarls at him]
Horrid Henry: I can't, because... [puts on his sunglasses] you are now looking at the lead singer of the Killer Boy Rats!
Perfect Peter: But, you're just a kid.
Horrid Henry: [outraged] No I'm not! Well I am, but anyway, this time next week, I'll be on a world tour!
Perfect Peter: But what will Mum and Dad say?
Horrid Henry: If I tell them, they'll never let me go.
Perfect Peter: But you can't not tell them.
Horrid Henry: Peter, Peter. Think about it. With me gone, the Purple Hand Gang's going to need a new Lord High Excellent Majesty, and uh, I was thinking...
Perfect Peter: Oh, yeah!
Horrid Henry: So uh, you won't be telling Mum and Dad, will you?
Perfect Peter: Uh, no...
Horrid Henry: And you will look after Fang?
Perfect Peter: [looks at Fang again, who snarls at him. He hands Fang back to Henry] No!
Horrid Henry: Worm. [walks out of Peter's bedroom and closes the door]
[The scene changes to Henry outside the music hall]
Horrid Henry: [puts Fang down] Oh, Peter's right. I am just a little kid. They're not gonna want me in their band. [sees Beefy Bert coming] Bert, do you think I look like a little kid?
Beefy Bert: I dunno.
Horrid Henry: Of course, you dunno. [Henry gets an idea] EUREKA! THAT'S IT! If you dunno, maybe they won't know either. Ha, you're coming with me, Bert.
Beefy Bert: Uh, I dunno.
[Inside, the Killer Boy Rats are performing]
Horrid Henry: [clears throat]
Killer Boy Rats Manager: Hello? Is anyone there?
Beefy Bert: Uh, I dunno.
[Henry puts on his mask and walks onto the stage]
Killer Boy Rats Manager: Ah-ha! It's our concert-crasher. How you doin'?
Beefy Bert: Uh, I dunno.
Keyboardist: [Henry puts Fang down] Ay-up, a rat! Nice touch. [they all laugh]
Killer Boy Rats Manager: You're a bit small for a rock star, aren't you?
Beefy Bert: I dunno.
Killer Boy Rats Manager: And what instrument do you play?
Beefy Bert: Uh, I dunno.
Killer Boy Rats Manager: He dunno! Well, I dunno if we can let you into the band then, buddy.
[They all laugh. Humiliated, Henry sits down at the drum kit and tries to show them his drumming talents, but his mask slips off in the process, revealing his true identity]
Killer Boy Rats Manager: You're a kid! Did you really think you could fool us for long?
Beefy Bert: I dunno.
[Back at Henry's house, the manager of the Killer Boy Rats is talking to Dad]
Killer Boy Rats Manager: And so you see, we can't really take a kid with us on tour.
Dad: No, you can't.
Killer Boy Rats Manager: Mind you, he's a pretty good drummer.
Dad: Really?
Killer Boy Rats Manager: [shakes Henry's hand] Good luck, Henry.
Horrid Henry: [disappointed] Yeah, thanks.
Dad: [closes the front door] Nice try, Henry.
Perfect Peter: [comes downstairs] Can I watch Ed Banger's Big Blue Broom-Broom?
Dad: Of course you can, Peter.
Horrid Henry: 'Ed Banger's Big Blue Broom-Broom'? This I've got to see.
Gordon's Dad: We interrupt this afternoon's show to bring you an important announcement.
Perfect Peter: Ooh, goody!
Gordon's Dad: Ed Banger is no longer nice. He has decided to rejoin the Killer Boy Rats.
Perfect Peter: Oh, no!
Gordon's Dad: For the latest on this story, we go live to crooked corner. [The doorbell rings and Peter goes to answer it] Ed, tell us what made you change your mind?
Ed Banger: Ay-up, I dunno.
Killer Boy Rats Manager: He says it happened during one of his concerts, where a young boy called Henry showed him the error of his ways.
Horrid Henry: Huh, that's Horrid Henry to you.
Perfect Peter: [comes running in] Ooh, Henry, there's a very long black car outside!
Horrid Henry: So?
Perfect Peter: And the driver says he's waiting for you!
Horrid Henry: What? [goes to see for himself]
Dad: Come on, Henry, we're going in a stretched limo.
Horrid Henry: Where to?
Dad: To see the Killer Boy Rats, of course!
Horrid Henry: Alright, Killer Boy Rats here I come!
[The scene changes to the music hall, where the Killer Boy Rats are performing 'Gonna be a Rockstar' but with one additional member: Henry, who's playing the drums]
Ed Banger: # I'm gonna play my guitar. Gonna play all night. I'm gonna be a big star. Gonna See my name in lights. I wanna go to town, my friends and me. Travel in a limo, back in time for tea. But my homework's still waiting for me. And I can't be late or there'll be no TV. Why do parents always get you down, down, down?
I'm gonna be a rockstar! Never need to go to school.
I'm gonna be a rockstar! I won't be nobody's fool.
I'm gonna be a rockstar! Just you wait and see. #
Horrid Henry: 'cause that boy on the stage, will be me!
[Green smoke engulfs the screen]
Killer Boy Rats Manager: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Henry has left the building.
Category:Transcripts