122304-2-11-2015-zero-to-fifty-tldr

== Content ==
			
The stream begins by ignoring me....  TONY!  TONY, YOU CAN'T HIDE!  DON'T IGNORE ME!  WHAT ABOUT YOUR CHILDREN!?  YOU EXPECT ME TO RAISE THEM ALONE!?
 
It's TL;DR time.  Last week's was cancelled do to an outbreak of bubonic plague at the office.  After bringing out the dead, it looks like Tony and Sunshine have returned.  Tony seems to have misplaced his hat, or he actually had to do his hair for an important meeting.  Actually, with his blue pattern shirt and weird slicked-back hair, he looks like he's about to take a guest spot on 90210.  DD seems sort of aware of that and seems a little eager for him to be embarrassed.
 
-We begin the stream with Tony questioning the existence of himself, the studio, and all things.  He cannot see the monitors, and yet he exists?  Does he really?  If the stream stopped, would he disappear?  Would anything mean anything?! ...... Hello? ..... Is there anybody in there? ..... Just say if you can hear me....  Now you all know what it's like to hear someone singing badly.
 
-Tony blames OBS for their technical trouble.  Maybe he should take some of the blame for himself.  Maybe if he treated OBS right, OBS would cook him dinner on time.
 
-They mention that there's been some kind of drop implemented.  Did anyone else hear anything about that?  It's news to me.  Apparently, it's extremely popular and people like that.  I guess these little things can skip you by if you aren't paying minute attention to all the social media.
 
-They ask you to take to the feedback thread.  They've hotfixed (patched) a few times since then.  Take your bug reports to the bug forums, where there is a Known Issues thread you can read to see if they know your issue exists.  It's been relatively smooth so far.  Or so I've been told.
 
-Today marks the patch.... OF LOVE..... nice job there, Michael Winslow.  Tony has been, combined between his dating and married life, with his wife for nine years.  I have him beat by 3 years.  No joke.  Step up your game, Tony, you're the Toki to my Skwissgar.  Carbine will be releasing Wildstar Valentine's Day cards for our use during the season.  In case your significant other appreciates Wildstar.  Which mine does.  She plays with me.  She's a pocket healer for me.  Yeah... just taking a second to remind everyone how awesome life is for me. :D
 
-Tony just made a Mystikal reference.  I think he just told DD to show him what she's working with.  I must have been minimized, I didn't see what happened.  Nevermind, must have been nothing....   Wait, Tony just asked DD to get her crotch out of Tony's face.  But when I bring the screen back up, they're just sitting there.  Must have been nothing....
 
-DD rains on our parade of suggestion by saying she named her scanbot after her son, Sam.  D'AAAAAAWWWWWWWW *cough cough*  Her character to level with Tony is named Darth Sunshine.  She makes it rain.  'Cuz money ain't no thang.
 
-Tony tells DD to watch the tornado.  He walks directly into a scorpion.  Tony needs to examine his priorities.  Thankfully, Dasmoose comes in to deliver a flying scissor kick to it's face.  Tony celebrates by aggroing another scorpion.  DD helpfully reminds him that he has an innate bound to R.  Tony says he knows.  DD is skeptical.  So are we.
 
-Tony says the area is packed, and they need to kill with caution.  Step up your game, Tony, because I kill at will.  I'd kill even faster if I had a level 50 backing me up.
 
-Tony dodges an attack!  He's finally learning!  He then does his best Don LaFontaine.  DD encourages him.  Tony accuses her of patronizing him.  Tony doesn't know what patronizing is.  Tony!  You're so good at using all your abilities!  I like how sometimes you mix in opening with charged shot on top of spamming quick draw!  So talented!
 
-Tony recognizes Dasmoose.  I'll take a moment to introduce you.  Dasmoose is the mayor of Entity housing, and has been the mayor after his father, Kim Il Moose, passed the leadership of the party on to him.  He's a good guy to know on Entity Exile side.  His housing is excellent and he's good people.  So say all of our newspapers, television programs, and billboard signs.
 
-DD.... don't convert to raid, you can't finish quests.  ....DD..... DD..... DAMNIT DD, TONY IS SUPPOSED TO BE SCREWING UP!  NOT YOU!  They finally get the raid situation sorted out and divide into two parties.  DD assigns the higher levels to watch over the lower levels... because Tony needs an adult chaperone if he's going to be on this field trip.
 
-Tony is getting too far, too fast.  DD tells him to slow it down.  Tony says he doesn't want to wait, he's ready to hit that.  DD asks what he wants to hit...  I brought the screen up from minimize, and nothing's happening.  Weird...  but my mind might be playing tricks on me.  Tony does tell us that murdering is bad.
 
-Tony has one job to do, picking up a scanbot.  His team swings into action... and he screws up the double tap.
 
 
-DD is suddenly very thankful no one can see in her bags.  Her old bags....  Tony seems as confused as I am.
 
-Tony asks if they saw him tap that.  Did we?  He double-tapped it good.  DD tells him he needs to reign it in, this isn't a bar.  I wonder what kind of bar they go to if he's not allowed to say that and she's happy no one's checking her bags.  Either way, Tony brags about showing that scanbot who's boss.  Then DD starts looking for Sam...  This stream has gone to a very dark place.
 
-DD runs over and starts slapping Jabbermaw because she thinks the team is behind her.  Now the stream has two players who aren't keeping track of the party!  I see this ending well!  Luckily, Dasmoose is there to kill everything and crush his opposition.
 
-Someone seems to notice there's a lot of innuendo happening in the stream today.  Tony replies, "In your end-o."  He also says that, in a pinch, he'll double-tap the HELL out of somebody.  Remind me not to go to PAX anytime when he's there.  I may be his last option at some point... and I don't think it's wrong to say I kind of hope I wouldn't be the absolute last.  It's hard to keep hair this luxurious if you're a guy...  DD says they shouldn't double tap the old bags.  That's ageist, DD, you take that back!  You deserved to be shot!  All women around the world deserve love.. what was Tony giving it to?
 
-DD asks him if he plowed it.  They have now used so many nerf darts between the two of them that Non has to reload.
 
-Tony... don't facepull the mobs.  Charged shot from a distance.... don't facepull Tony.... DON'T FACEPULL TONY!  FFS YOU'RE IN LIGHT ARMOR!  Have you never played a video game in your life?  You have guns, don't use your teeth on the mobs!
 
-The party arrives at the Duskstalker and... Tony must go on alone.  Everyone else has completed the quest, they're barred from following.  Tony gets to enter the Duskstalker without his gang, without Dasmoose, and without DD.  He is on his own.  We now pause five minutes while everyone goes and cooks up a bag of popcorn.  Yes, it really is worth watching.  It starts right at 28:50 in the stream.  Go ahead, get the stream up, skip to that part, get your popcorn.  Believe me, I'll wait.  I've got mine already!
 
 
Let the train wreck begin!
 
-DD tries to tell Tony how to go left to grab the lesser pack of mobs.  Tony decides to explain his strategy.  It takes him so long that he has a partrol walk into range.  He decides to back up to show us how to pull the mob over.  He backs into the aggro radius of the pair of mobs he was initially avoiding.  He manages to survive.  He continues on to the Walken mob.  Dis mob... he's un-*cupcake*ing-believable.
 
-Tony feels confident.  He walks to a pack of mobs.... right past another mob.  That mob starts trying to kill him.  He turns to face it, but the other pack he was initially walking towards aggros.  The result is simply... sublime.  And fatal.
 
-DD tells him that he should walk straight down the center of the room.  I've never seen someone trolling a dev from three feet away, especially another dev!  Of course, he aggroes.  DD thinks he's about to take it from behind, but he's just in a bit of pain.
 
-Tony has a string where, in attempting to sneak by one mob, he aggroes FOUR SEPERATE MOBS!  That's got to be some kind of record!
 
-Tony then walks down a hallway, and learns that there's a pathing bug in the connecting tunnel that causes the mobs to reset if you cross its halfway point.  And yet, Tony manages to live!  He's finally learning!  Just like a big boy!  He walks into the second room and manages to pull two packs.  Ahhh, another death.  This is why we voted for Spellslinger, right?
 
-Tony makes it to the final quest mob.  Odds?  Bets?  Tony eats a respawn midfight and dies.  Isn't it glorious?
 
-Tony aggros four mobs... and wins!  Will this be his last trip against the final mob?  Of course not.  He aggros a mob while talking, doesn't notice, and eats it in the back as he pulls.  He still almost wins!  We'll see...
 
-Tony uses all of his skills, DD's tutelage, and his skill to finally kill an end-segment solo quest mob!  I feel conflicted, like a father whose son just learned to read at ten.  I'm proud, yet I feel like we should really get him checked for special needs.  At least he's proud of himself.  Enjoy the moment, Tony.  You earned it.  Someday, you'll even be able to contribute in a dungeon.  Eventually... someday....
 
-It's time for a community shout out!  And a serial-killer stare from DD...  The Wildstar online magazine by GameOn is mentioned!  They are looking for more writers and subscribers.  Definitely go and read those.  One day, we'll be so advanced that these will also be magazines we can take to the toilet with us.
 
-It's time for fan art.  Today's segment will be on fan art that doesn't come in drawing form, and includes a crochet rowsdower by Nocturnal Muse!  The next is some Aurin cosplay by Samantha Flatley.  The stream immediately goes from suggestive to full-on caveman.  Not that I'm complaining.  Seriously, ladies, do send in your art. B)   They also include some dynamic graphic design art by Rikudo (hope I spelled it right... actually I don't care).  It looks awesome.  Send your fan art, in whatever form you have it, to fanart@wildstar-online.com.
 
-Tony returns to his housing plot.  Tony shows us his windmill plug.  Apparently, he has just learned that adding a plug crates all of his decor in that plug.  Way to learn like a man, Tony!  He's also finished his exile headquarters.  Awwww, that's cute, Tony!  Community, feel free to embarrass him by posting your pictures of your hideout below!  He has also built a casino for high rollers.  They stop to take a picture.  Of course, Roda jumps up and starts dancing on the tables.  So THAT's the kind of bar they go to!
 
-We end the stream with Tony just thanking almighty Raptor Jesus that he killed that damn thing.  Yeah, because if he hadn't, he might have been embarassed... ^_^
 
Anyway, that's the end of the stream and the end of the TL;DR.  If you'll excuse me, I've got a flying death fortress to build.  *cupcake* off.	
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			On point with the Ice Cube song.	
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...They stop to take a picture.  Of course, DD jumps up and starts dancing on the tables.  So THAT's the kind of bar they go to!
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On point with the Ice Cube song.
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Hey now!
 
DD's too classy for those kinds of shenanigans.
 
I, on the other hand, am not.
DD sat there until the end of the stream.
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Right!  Let me change it so that you're the one dancing on the table! :D
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Journalistic integrity! 
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			Awesome job as usual Vic!!	
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Awesome job as usual Vic!!
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 I try.  Apparently, it's sometimes hard to tell the Aurin apart... >.>
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Hey now!
 
DD's too classy for those kinds of shenanigans.
 
 
 
I, on the other hand, am not.
 
DD sat there until the end of the stream.
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