Chapter 9/transcript

At the nuclear plant, Baghead is walking through the parking lot with Joe (Mama).
 His remaining henchmen, of which there are only a few, are picking out firearms from a crate. In addition to the golf buggy, there is now a jeep as well.
 “the equipment i have brought to you came at little expense to me, my clan may have lost its power, but we are still far richer than most could ever hope to be”
 “i was under the impression you were the last of your clan”
 “not at all... and when this breakout is done... i believe it will be worth your time to stand before the council of clan mama. request their backing and their support, enlist them as allies before you leave on your journey to the bedrock border”
 “and you are still sure this little prison break you’ve pitched to me is going to be worth the trouble?”
 “absolutely... there are some high priority inmates still locked up in the neighbourhood police station’s holding cells who would be of great use to you if recruited... i have taken the liberty of passing the list onto your lackey”
 Carson glances up from the list with a frown. He goes to speak, though bites his tongue.
 “all of them are accounted for on here... we even have a note of what cells they are in”
 Baghead turns to Joe, surprised.
 “most impressive”
 “being the mayor’s chief of staff has its benefits. when the mission is done there will no doubt be unrest in the town, your appearance will send the neighbourhood into the perfect downward spiral. mayor rogelio will choke on his promises and it will be easy for me to come and clean up the mess, he will be ousted from power and i will have my chance to take his position in office”
 Baghead steps up onto the jeep, overlooking his small pack of henchmen. He raises his melted chocolate launcher.
 “gentlemen… come with me and take the first steps in our second conquest of the known world. carson, run everyone through a once over of the plan and then be ready to roll out”
 Joe approaches Baghead.
 “i have something for you, something you’re going to need if you want to breach the front gates with ease"
 Baghead looks over with intrigue.
----
 At the Shujinko Clan Estate, Jenerikku is packing a bag. He recalls an earlier conversation with Mr. Honda.
 During that talk, Mr. Honda had approached him in the lounge of his estate.
 “we won’t have much time for lessons while we’re travelling, so i wanted to talk to you about this now”
 “sure, what is it, mr. honda?”
 “you are a shujinko. that means something, jenerikku. your appearance at the citadel is going to bring a lot of attention to you. i don’t want you to mistake that attention for pressure”
 “positive or negative attention?”
 “it could be mixed. some will be in awe of you, having heard of the shujinko clan and it’s heroism before settling in the neighbourhood... others may be jealous”
 “what is there to be jealous of? my family is dead”
 “jealous of your power you currently possess and will continue to gain, of the attention you get from others, who hope you will restore the clan that once brought so much hope to the world”
 “well i’m not that special, and if anyone is going to have a problem with me and my goal, i’ll just give them a piece of my mind”
 Mr. Honda lightly chuckles.
 “well at least you possess your father’s spirit. he and you are very alike, and you’ll be in good hands at the citadel, where many of his old friends are stationed”
 “i just want to make my family proud. i want to keep being strong for them so they can know the shujinko clan was left in good hands. so my clan can have a future and not be wiped out alongside them”
 “your mother and father would be extremely proud of you jenerikku, and i am also proud to have been your mentor. whatever happens and whatever obstacles you face, whether they break your bones or defeat you, never let anything break your spirit, embrace that will of steel you possess and nothing will stop you”
 “thank you mr. honda”
 Mr. Honda looks over at his protége with a smile.
 “for everything”
 In the present, Jenerikku approaches a jewellery stand in his room. With caution, he approaches a little glass case protecting a particular necklace within it. He gently lifts the case off and takes the necklace in his hand delicately, removing it from the stand. For a moment, he stares at the necklace longingly.
 A quick flash in his mind allows him to picture clearly the face of a beautiful woman. She has an innocent smile.
 After a few seconds, he packs the necklace safely away in his bag, zipping it up. Jenerikku takes one last look back at his room before walking out.
----
 At Reeves Laboratory, Richard is inspecting Candy Callum’s wounds.
 “well you’ll be pleased to know that your wounds sustained from your fight at the midnight club are almost healed. i still recommend you take it easy but the crack that used to run through your body has been sealed”
 “i cannot thank you enough for all of your help, doctor reeves. you have given me a place to stay, tended to my injuries and joined my team”
 “that’s because it is the right thing to do, and things are looking better for us, our mission yesterday was a success”
 Candy Callum ponders on those words.
 “technically speaking it was... but i sacrificed something very dear to me in order for it to have gone as smoothly as it did”
 “hmm?”
 “there is someone i need to talk to, i might just have enough time to catch them once more”
----
 Mr. Honda is standing at The Neighbourhood’s front gates awaiting Jenerikku’s arrival.
 Candy Callum swings down from a nearby tree, landing behind a bush for cover.
 “callum?”
 “i had to speak to you just once more mr. honda. i have done something terrible, and betrayed my sworn oath as a vigilante of the citadel. i should have told you when i came by your store last night, but i could not bring myself to face the gravity of the situation and tried to hide from what i had done”
 Mr. Honda looks down at the candy cane curiously.
 “i have betrayed the code. i have taken lives unjustly. criminals, as bad as they can be, have a right to be tried in court, but yesterday, me and my team killed at least a dozen when we destroyed the bullet factory. i could have done something to save them, but it didn’t feel like an option at the time. looking back, i think i was wrong”
 “i see, and you have come here seeking my opinion, i take it?”
 “any guidance you can give me sir”
 “you aren’t in an easy position my sweet toothed friend, you have been wrongfully framed by a man who holds power and influence over the media, you have been called out as a rogue vigilante for trying to protect your town and wanting to avenge your creator... you have displayed enormous courage and determination in putting together the crew that you did to stand against the mafia when everyone else turned their back on you”
 He turns and looks on at the town in front of the two.
 “we vigilantes are far from perfect. we are beacons of hope across the lands and peacemakers across the known world, it is true, but when we are faced with a tough decision we have the power to choose the path that will, in the end, lead to the most positive outcome. i learned recently that not all of mister big’s henchmen are truly evil, i was saved by one myself, and i still haven’t had the chance to find out why that man did what he did, he showed compassion toward me when he had no obligation to”
 “then i feel terrible... what if any of the men in that bullet factory were good too---”
 “...however... men like him come few and far between. it is true, there could have been good men in there, but you do not have the luxury to save every life in the position you are in. you need to be able to live with what you have done and simply atone for it by ensuring you see the cause you blew up that bullet factory for seen through to the end... which is to free your town from the clutches of mister big and his mafia”
 Callum nods slowly.
 “looking back, maybe i should have arranged some kind of makeshift prison for them, something to detain them in... all that extensive planning going into the mission and not once did i think of their lives. i know i couldn’t just let them go free, they’d know who was responsible... and something tells me mister big knows it was me who did it, but i don’t want my accomplices being found out alongside me”
 “you made a tough call, callum, but you have still proven yourself to be an honourable vigilante. the mafia have to be taken down one way or another, and if a dozen mobsters have to die to save many more innocent lives down the line, maybe it is a price worth paying. i have done things, all vigilantes have done things, that we are not particularly proud of, but part of playing the hero is that we carry those burdens on our backs so that the world can be carefree”
 “mr. honda thank you. the neighbourhood will be freed from the mafia’s grasp, and if any mobster seeks to redeem themselves i will ensure they are saved”
 “when i return, i will help you see to it, unless you’ve already made it a reality by then”
 “here’s hoping”
 Mr. Honda smiles.
 Jenerikku approaches, wearing his backpack. Hagane is also attached to his back with a sword strap.
 “it appears you caught me just in time after all”
 “i’m glad i did”
 Mr. Honda looks to Jenerikku.
 “are you all ready to go?"
 “yep”
 “then we’ll waste no time. take one good look back at town, it’s going to be a while until you return”
 Jenerikku smiles, looking back.
 “and when i do i’ll make sure the town knows that the shujinko clan is back in action and ready to kick some ass”
 “that’s the spirit boy. off we go. farewell candy callum”
 “farewell”
 Callum watches as the two depart from town on foot, setting off away from The Neighbourhood together. He smiles to himself, reassured.
----
 In his apartment, Abysmal is tossing different fruits into a blender.
 Terry is sitting in an armchair reading the newspaper.
} Jerard Jerrardsson, the homeless man living with the two, is opening a pack of baseball cards. He tears open the pack and begins to shuffle through the cards. His face lights up with a hint of excitement.
} “this is a good pull. 19 dollars on ebay”
 “are you planning to sell baseball cards to regain your fortune?”
} “not at all i would never sell these gems. i am a collector, and after losing the few belongings i did have in my briefcases at the bank, my prized collection of baseball cards among them, i have had to start over again, by visiting different corner shops and committing petty theft, swiping a few packs of cards at each”
 “i guess stealing baseball cards isn’t so bad”
} “the guilt of stealing is a small price to pay for not having to pay at all. i am sure neither of you are going to judge me of course, considering what you’ve been up to”
 “huh?”
} “blowing up the bullet factory and all”
 Terry lowers his newspaper and glances over at Abysmal with a concerned look.
 “are you kidding me? are you telling people what we did like it’s nothing?”
 “no of course not i only told jerard. i mean he lives with us and he’s a G, right jerard?”
} “i am indeed a G”
 “see? nothing to worry about”
 “i’m just trying to live with the fact that we blew up a dozen men back there”
 “terry they were assholes it’s okay, we evacuated the people who mattered”
 “easy for you to say! i hit and killed a man! i never wanted to end up in this much trouble”
 “are you in any trouble?”
 “well no, but if we get caught--”
 “did we get caught? see stop worrying it’s fine”
 “well fine, but you can’t tell me to stop worrying when you’ve been panicking all morning”
} “why is he panicking?”
 “because yesterday at the bullet factory, one of the workers abysmal freed was actually a former rival of his, and as he refuses to admit, his bully”
 “NO he’s not my bully OK? pfft i can handle him its ok... besides we’re adults now we can be mature”
 Abysmal gulps.
 “then why are you worrying so much, huh?”
 “i’m not gonna be worrying after i take one sip of my goodluck smoothie, then i’m gonna go into my club with my head held high today and make sure it's in good shape. i can’t let him have the satisfaction of him seeing it trashed”
 “sounds like you have your work cut out for you”
 “i have a week before he’s due to turn up alright? i’ll get it done just watch me”
----
 Later, Abysmal is walking down the street confidently. He takes a sip of his smoothie. He makes a turn, approaching his club, and suddenly freezes to a halt, laying his eyes on something.
 “no…”
 Abysmal drops his smoothie in shock, having spotted a clown car parked just outside of his club.
 “NOOO”
 He approaches the club nervously, his confidence had quickly faded. Shakily, he takes out the key to the club and twists it in the door, which is still locked to his relief. He gets into the club, slamming the door shut behind him with a sigh of relief. The lights were off and the club was surely empty.
 Suddenly, Ronald appears out of left field and grabs Abysmal in a headlock. He rubs his knuckles against Abysmal’s skull, giving him a nuggie.
 “AHOLE HEY HOW YA DOIN? I BEEN WAITING FOR YOU ALL MORNIN!”
 He throws Abysmal to the ground, letting go.
 “hah, i was beginning to wonder if i came to the right place, but now i guess it makes sense why it’s so trashy and all the furniture is broken”
 “uhh-- it’s-- it’s ahul now… remember…”
 “AH QUIT YOUR WHINING AND HAVE A LITTLE FUN”
 “how did you get IN here?”
 “i broke in through the back window dummy, hah, abysmal you got a brain in there? HAH”
 Ronald leans down, knocking on Abysmal’s head.
 “thick skulled am i right?”
 “i uhm... i wasn’t expecting you until next week”
 “i figured i’d come early, let the party get started quicker”
 “well you see today is kind of a bad time... you know you’ll notice the mess... yeah the club got trashed and i really need to fix it up you know-- you can come back next--”
 Ronald’s manic grin transforms into a frown.
 “oh... oh i see how it is… i decide to come here and wait all morning for you, make the effort of showing up and... of course you’d turn me away, what are friends for, right ahole?”
 “well uh... i just wasn’t sure we were still friends…”
 Ronald is shocked.
 “abysmal... how COULD you say that... no... don’t tell me this is you being delusional... being… selfish? what because i busted your balls back in the day? are you really gonna look down on me with your privilege and tell me we’re not friends just because you broke big with your fancy little club and success as a comedian?”
 “no what-- that’s crazy where are you getting that---”
 “oh you’re gonna call me crazy now too huh, is that how it is ahole? well i was so happy to see you after you freed me from the mafia’s leash, i thought it was symbolising a new beginning for the both of us... i thought you trusted me... i’ve kept your secret safe haven’t i? isn’t that what friends do?”
 “my… my secret?”
 “that you were one of the terrorists who bombed the bullet factory of course, you put a lot of people out of jobs, even took a lot of lives, i saw you gun down men in cold blood myself... it’d be a pity for you and your business if that got out”
 “oh come on not cool man i saved you”
 “and now you’re telling me i’m not your friend... well... if i’m not your friend then i have no reason to keep your secrets”
 “no no--- i just--- i never knew we were still friends... that’s all”
 “well why didn’t you just say so!”
 Ronald smiles, approaching Abysmal. He offers a handshake with a sympathetic look. This triggers something in Abysmal. A memory.
 “lighten up then ahole, let’s have a drink here and now and forget all the nasty stuff, let's both catchup, yeah? i’d love to lend an ear to your... successes”
 Sceptical, Abysmal shakes Ronald’s hand, though is pulled into an abrupt hug.
 Ronald pats his back, hugging him tightly.
 Abysmal eventually frees himself from the hug, pacing over to the bar.
 “well uh… there is some bad news... maybe we should do this another time... you see all my booze got smashed when my club was raided”
 “oh don’t you worry about that, i’ll go buy us some drinks, yeah? all on me, don’t you worry about covering it. i’ll be back in a bit ahole”
 Ronald exits the club. Abysmal sighs in relief. He reaches into his back pocket.
 “hey my wallet is gone----”
 He looks down at the floor, coming to the sinking realization.
 “oh”
----
 At The Neighbourhood’s front gates, Bob is sitting atop his post on the wall playing chess with Bruh Bot.
 “i have calculated that my victory is now ensured”
 Bob shakes his head, moving one final piece into place.
 “checkmate”
 “IMPOSSIBLE”
 Bob grins.
 “my superior programming was supposed to ensure my victory. how has this happened?”
 “you can’t just trust a machine or the results it produces to predict the outcome of a battle, you need to know your opponent. i used a variety of strategies to beat you there, leading you on, baiting you, giving you the false sense of security that you were winning, but it turns out i was playing a whole other game to the one you thought i was. looks like you’re gonna have to wait another day to beat me at chess”
 “boring game anyway. i would much prefer a real fight”
 “you know you’re still welcome to join our team taking on the mafia bruh bot”
 “my programming forbids it. my duty is to the neighbourhood watch and any external threats that face our town. the best i could do to help you was supply you with some of my C4”
 “well it wouldn’t have been possible without the C4, so for that your contribution is dearly appreciated”
 Bruh Bot marches off, sitting down at his own post. He picks up a manga where he left off and continues to read it.
 Bob packs the chess board away and stands up. He stares off into the horizon, though is quickly alarmed when he sees a jeep speeding toward the front gates.
 “hey uh... hey bruh bot?”
 Baghead is standing in the back of the jeep.
 Carson is at the wheel. Two other henchmen are in the jeep with them.
 Trailing behind them is a group of four more henchmen in the golf buggy.
 “sir... the gate?”
 “don’t slow down no matter how close we get, time is of the essence, as soon as we breach town we need to get the mission done as quickly as possible to make a smooth escape. this town is hardly equipped to deal with the raid, we’ll be fine”
 “understood sir”
 “UH BRUH BOT THEY AREN’T SLOWING DOWN”
 Bruh Bot stands up, placing his manga down. He rises up aiming his RPG over the wall.
 “SPEED UP”
 Bob grabs hold of his binoculars. He looks through them, quickly noticing Baghead.
 “oh fuck”
 Baghead lifts up and aims a missile launcher at the front gate.
 “OK BRUH BOT FIRE”
 “BRUHHHHH”
 Bruh Bot fires the RPG, the rocket heading straight for the approaching jeep.
 Carson swerves, the jeep avoiding the blast.
 “fuck”
 Baghead fires his missile launcher, which impacts directly with the front gates. The gates are blown off their hinges and Baghead’s miniature convoy breaches the town, speeding through them.
 Bob grabs his phone. He scrolls through his contacts until he finds Candy Callum.
----
 After a few minutes, Abysmal is on the phone to Terry in his club.
 “i just don’t get it... things ended terribly between us... we were friends once that’s true... but then he became an asshole when he got jealous... there has to be more to this than new beginnings…”
 “well... why don’t you finally tell me the story between you and him?”
 In a flashback, Abysmal recalls starting out as a comedian when he was young and had just left college. He recalls being seated backstage at a stand-up club next to Ronald Scagnetti, the club showing off the talent of up and coming comedians.
 “he was a peculiar kind of guy, he didn’t look very confident, and he was dressed as a clown, and in truth i never actually saw him without that makeup or wig on”
 He recalls Ronald standing up in front of everyone during his act.
 ”i’d went just before him, and my stand up had managed to leave the club in stitches. it was one of the first occasions i really learned that i had a gift for comedy and that this could work as a career for me”
 “and what about ronald’s act?”
 Abysmal recalls the increasingly discouraged look on Ronald’s face as he continued to deliver his jokes, amusing nobody in the club. No laughter was heard in the air, and when he finished, nobody went as far to even clap for him. Ronald had sludged back into his seat backstage next to Abysmal, his confidence was clearly shattered.
 “it didn’t go so well, and the poor guy’s dreams of being a comedian were clearly vanishing quickly, he looked broken when he sat down next to me backstage. so i decided to introduce myself”
 In the flashback, Abysmal offers a handshake to Ronald.
 ”lighten up my guy, it’ll get better with practice, my name’s abysmal ahole”
 Abysmal smiles cheerily at the man, who looks over with a flicker of hope in his eyes.
 “i’m ronald scagnetti it’s nice to meet you ahole”
 “we shook hands and we talked, bonding over our love of comedy, and at the time, i did begin to consider him a friend... i helped him work on his own comedic writing, helped him discover what inspiration worked for him and where he should look, what his own strengths and weaknesses were”
 “so where did it all go wrong?”
 “i think i learned that... helping him come out of his shell was the worst decision i ever made… because the truth is he was a terrible person under it all... ungrateful... rude... and jealous…”
 “jealous?”
 “of me. he was jealous of me. he hated that i was... funnier than him... and it became apparent that he thought i was just stringing him along to clubs with me to perform so i could have the satisfaction of being better than him, as absurd as it sounds. naturally, being around him became tiring and it sucked, because he was a bully, and every time we fought he’d just get angry and call me privileged and successful..."
 He recalls arguing with Ronald backstage at a club one time.
 ”i’m just trying to help you, man, lay off!”
 ”oh here comes ahole with his superior words that i need to live by! yeah because you’re sooooo much better than me, is that it?”
 “our friendship naturally grew distant, it got so bad that he even challenged me and made an event out of it, advertised a showdown between us in front of a crowd at a club to really put to the test who was funnier... he wanted to embarrass me and assert his dominance so i’d no longer be an obstacle in his path”
 “and did he succeed?”
 “lmao fuck no. i stomped him... and he hated that... he hated it so much... but after our showdown he just kinda fell off the grid... things got bad for him, i know he developed a drinking problem, started working as a clown at birthday parties and public events full time”
 “abysmal he doesn’t sound like a particularly pleasant guy… what if he--”
 “i won't let him get the best of me. i might seem scared of him, but i’m just uncomfortable, he represents a failed friendship, because he was someone i used to get along with who went on a real downward spiral. today i’ll settle this once and for all and send him off”
----
 Quenton waddles into the police station, donut in hand.
 Officer Paul Lowpoly is seated at the front desk.
 “oh evening chief”
 “what’s up lowpoly, working hard or hardly working?”
 Quenton chuckles, amused with himself.
 “got some files for you on the recent cases chief, gatorg and deception have been approved to be moved to thicc bars maximum security prison tomorrow, they were registered just earlier this morning as dangerous supervillain level criminals”
 “okay good stuff paul... why is deception’s file so small?”
 “oh uhm... well... less paperwork is involved when you’re trying to lock up someone of african american descent”
 “pfft i’m not complaining, less work for me. i’ll do all of this when i’m back, i just came in to grab my report, i have a meeting with the city council”
 From within his holding cell, Gatorg is curled up, shuddering.
 “they can’t violate my ass in here... i’m safe behind these bars…”
 Deception is seated in the cell across from him. There is a basketball and hoop in his cell.
 “why do you get that in your cell”
 “because these niggas be claiming that they aren’t racist and want to give me a chance to exercise”
 “hahahahah”
 “oh don’t you laugh at me or i’ll come for that ass myself, you hear?”
 “NO”
 Officer Bruce Dipper steps in.
 “stop being lame guys, deception go play with your basketball or something ok? i’m trying to enjoy the view in peace”
 Officer Taits is in front of him, reaching under a table with her ass poking out.
 “bruce are you sure you dropped your pen?”
 “absolutely darling, it’s under there, keep at it, i have confidence you’ll be able to find it because you’re way more able than i am”
 “yes sir!”
 “ohhhhh yeah”
 “alright everyone i’m leaving for my meeting, make sure deception is allowed to stretch his legs, if he gets hungry there’s chicken in the fridge”
 “you got it chief”
 Quenton exits the building, heading for his police cruiser.
 Just one minute after Quenton has driven off, Baghead’s convoy pulls up right outside the police station.
 “YOU ALL KNOW WHAT TO DO. MOVE IN”
 The henchmen all charge into the police station armed. Immediately, they throw smoke grenades down in the main room.
 Baghead cackles, readying his melted chocolate launcher.
 “carson”
 “sir?”
 Baghead points over to a parked armoured police truck.
 “go get her ready, i want our guests to have a safe journey back to the plant”
 Inside, Bruce rolls into cover as smoke fills the room. He grabs his pistol.
 “oh not groovy, we’re under attack. everyone into position!”
 “ugh but i need to find that pen!”
 The henchmen charge into the room, some of them rushing straight for the holding cells.
 “everyone! we are here to rescue you!”
 The henchman approaches a large holding cell filled with angry looking thugs.
 “please go out into town and enjoy yourselves! commit whatever crime you were in for!”
 The henchman opens the cell, and all of the men rush out roaring.
 “please do not push everyone you’re all going to be free---”
 He looks up at the sign above the holding cell he just opened.
 Caution: Serial Rapists.
 “oof”
 Another henchman opens a holding cell filled with looters.
 “GO FORTH! BE FREE!”
 In the front room, Bruce notices all of the criminals bursting out of the holding cells area. They swarm the room, beginning to trash it, though before he can do much of anything, the majority of them disappear in the smoke and flee the building.
 Baghead marches in proudly, wielding his melted chocolate launcher. He whistles to the sound of the alarm that has been set off and approaches the front desk.
 “stop right there criminal! whoever you are, petty thief or mass murderer, paul lowpoly will not let you pass this point!”
 “you don’t know who i am?”
 “should i?”
 “oh fuck you”
 Baghead aims the melted chocolate launcher at the man and fires.
 The ball of burning chocolate splatters off of Paul, knocking him into and sticking him to the wall. He burns slowly as his skin melts off of his face, his cries of agony slowly fading as he dies.
 Baghead grabs one of his henchman by the shoulder.
 “report”
 “we’ve released all of the thugs sir, they will now run rampant in town as planned--”
 Bruce fires, hitting the henchman straight in the head.
 “OH YEAH. HEADSHOT BITCH! TIME TO BOOGIE!”
 Baghead immediately aims his chocolate launcher at Bruce in response.
 “uh oh”
 Bruce dives to the side as a ball of melted chocolate is launched toward him. It explodes all over that corner of the room, the melted chocolate puddling along the floor. He crawls under the table that Officer Taits is still positioned.
 “wowee, sounds like quite the rodeo out there!”
 “babe i need to borrow your phone so i can call the chief, my one is currently malfunctioning at my desk covered in melted chocolate”
 “sure thing it’s in my back pocket”
 “ohhhhhhhhh yeah”
 Baghead steps into the holding cells area. He approaches the cells of Gatorg and Deception.
 “ayo why’d your punk ass henchman let everyone out except us?”
 “you two are special, and you’ll be coming with me”
----
 Outside, Carson has hijacked the armoured police truck. He sits himself in the driver's seat.
 Baghead exits the police station with Deception, Gatorg, and only two henchmen. He unlocks the cage around Gatorg’s arm cannon.
 “show me what you’ve got!”
 Gatorg scrolls through the wheel on his cannon, selecting the explosive option. He begins to charge it up.
 Three police officers run out of the building in pursuit of Baghead’s gang. They all aim their pistols and open fire. One of the henchmen is shot dead instantly.
 The other is grabbed and used as a shield by Baghead. The human shield absorbs all of the gunfire before dropping dead. Baghead then looks around, alarmed.
 “WHERE is deception?”
 Gatorg shrugs, still charging his arm cannon.
 Deception suddenly reveals himself as one of the three cops firing at them. He takes off a police hat, having nothing more to his disguise.
 “you have been deceived”
 He turns on his two fellow officers and guns them down instantly.
 “most impressive”
 Gatorg finishes charging up his cannon and aims it at the front door. He fires, the entire front half of the police station exploding and collapsing into rubble.
 “gentlemen... let us be on our way”
 Baghead leads the others into the back of the truck.
 Carson slams his foot on the gas, the truck speeding down the street.
 Candy Callum grapples down onto the truck from above, landing on top of it. Citizens on the street everywhere begin to catch sight of Baghead’s gang as they speed down the street toward the entrance.
 “the vigilante from the bank sir! he’s on the roof!”
 “that fucking candy cane…”
 “leave it to me... i have a bone to pick with that tasty little christmas treat”
 Gatorg opens the truck’s back doors and climbs up onto the roof, he begins to charge his cannon, having selected ‘electricity’ as his new mode.
 “i won’t let you get away”
 “we weren’t asking for permission”
 Callum jumps forward, kicking Gatorg in the face.
 Gatorg stumbles back, but keeps his balance.
 Callum goes to do it again, however Gatorg grabs him and throws him off of the truck with a mighty swing. Callum quickly grapples onto the truck, now gliding behind it as it speeds down the street.
 However Gatorg aims his now fully charged cannon at the vigilante and hits him with it directly.
 The bolt of lightning zaps Candy Callum, stunning him. He collapses onto the road as the truck speeds off without him. Baghead is heard cackling. To avoid the incoming crowd of people, Callum rushes down a back alley and disappears.
 Among the crowd of amazed people, Ronald steps forward, watching the truck speed off into the distance.
 “master…”
----
 At the town hall, Quenton is on the phone outside of the meeting room. He nods, hanging up quickly and then speeding back into the room, forcing the doors open.
 Inside, Rogelio is seated at the head of the table, and all of the members of the city council are present, Richard, Monkey, Sy Cotic and Joe.
 Monkey is spinning around in his swivel chair.
 “wow chief why the sudden burst of movement that’s not like you”
 “we have a problem”
 “what is it?”
 Quenton rushes to the window, looking outside.
 An angry mob has formed outside of town hall.
 Richard stands up, approaching the window.
 “what happened?”
 “there’s been a mass breakout at the police department, criminals are running rampant in the streets”
 “dear god…”
 “how... tragic indeed... do we know the orchestrator of this attack?”
 “...baghead... many of my officers died trying to stop him, and none of them successfully pursued him out of town”
 “my oh my... baghead... did you not explicitly promise the people that if he were to return, he would be dealt with, mr mayor?”
 Rogelio frowns.
 “the people deserve answers... i think it best you supply”
 “hold the fucking phone, are you suggesting we just send the mayor out there in harms way?”
 “do you have a better suggestion on how we disperse the mob?”
 “he’s right, monkey... i need to face the people”
 “give me a few minutes to get a small force of officers on the scene for you, we do not want things to get nasty”
 “you should focus on assembling your police force elsewhere, i’ll defend the mayor with my life if i have to”
 Monkey reaches into a drawer, taking out two uzi’s and twirling them.
 “dear god are you going to gun them all down?”
 “only if they try anything”
----
 Rogelio steps outside of town hall alongside Quenton and Monkey.
 “hot damn this mob looks thirsty for a piece of rogelio pie”
 “monkey!”
 “ok ok im sorry. don’t worry man i got your back”
 Rogelio approaches the podium outside.
 “everyone, i want you to know that i am just as alarmed as you are--- i only just found out of the terrible news regarding the breakout at the police station--"
 “YEW PROMISED US BAGHEAD WOULDN’T BE BACK”
 “YEAH and if he was you said he’d be dealt with! so where’s your plan of action! there’s rapists on the streets and looters robbing stores!”
 “EVERYONE calm down our police force is being mobilised as we speak, we’re going to handle this crimewave, clearly it is an organised attack--”
 “THE NEIGHBOURHOOD GONNA DIE”
 “EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF”
 “EVERYONE WAIT-- IF YOU ALL JOIN IN IT’S ONLY GOING TO MAKE THE SITUATION WORSE-- WHEREAS IF WE--”
 “I’M GONNA GET ME A NEW TV”
 Rogelio steps back as the crowd roars, beginning to charge into different directions.
 “MR MAYOR GET INSIDE”
 Jeremy, a local baseball player, swings his bat, knocking someone out of his way.
 “YOU SUCK MR MAYOR, I’M GONNA CRACK YOUR SKULL”
 “oh fuck no”
 Monkey readies his uzi’s.
 “GO MR MAYOR I’LL BUY YOU SOME TIME AGAINST THESE DEGENERATES”
 “monkey i don’t want you to kill anybody!”
 “SO BE IT”
 Monkey holsters the uzi’s.
 “I’LL TAKE YOU ALL ON WITH PURE SKILL”
 “monkey no don't!”
 “mr mayor come on we need to get you in”
 Quenton escorts Rogelio inside. He turns to Joe, Sy Cotic and Richard.
 “board up the front door quickly everyone, and then board yourselves in the mayor’s office at once”
 “what about you?”
 “you’re about to be so happy with your decision to increase police funding mr mayor... i’m calling in the riot squad... now everyone get to work!”
 Richard reaches for his phone, raising it to call Candy Callum.
----
Outside, the streets have quickly descended into chaos. Criminals roam free, looting stores and attacking homes.
 Sacha is standing in front of a camera crew with a microphone in one hand. Behind him, garbage cans are being set on fire as the riots get progressively worse. He is forced to yell to be heard.
 “WELCOME ALL TO THE NEIGHBOURHOOD NEWS, WHERE TONIGHT WE ARE REPORTING LIVE ON THE SCENE OF THE TOWN RIOTS”
 Behind Sacha, citizens are fighting each other in the streets. A car swerves off the road, crashing into a lamp post which then collapses and crushes a man.
 “AS YOU CAN SEE BEHIND ME, THINGS HAVE GOTTEN CRAZY IN TOWN TONIGHT, AS THE NOTORIOUS SUPERVILLAIN BAGHEAD HAS ORCHESTRATED A MASS PRISON BREAK”
 “DOWN WITH DEMOCRACY. FUCK THE MAYOR RIGHT UP HIS QUEER ASS”
 “as you can see confidence in mayor rogelio is dwindling. does he have a plan of action? this redneck doesn’t think so”
 “WHAT’D YOU CALL ME?”
 “GET BACK FIEND”
 Sacha pulls out a revolver, firing into the redneck’s chest on live TV.
 “this is sacha anoose of the neighbourhood news, stay safe out there folks! now for a message from sonik speekz!”
 In the newsroom, Sonik is standing within his studio. He puts his thumbs up with a smile.
 “grab your glocks and get ready to defend the household kids, the hour of revolution is upon us all!”
----
 Terry rushes out of the apartment block to see his taxi being trashed by a group of criminals. Jerard rushes out after him.
 “oh my god… HEY STOP THAT”
The looters snicker to themselves.
 Rajeesh pulls up in his own taxi.
 “ohhhh how unfortunate for you terry, ah? looks like it’s going to be even longer until you have any hope of getting back out on the road!
 “oh SCREW YOU I’M SICK OF YOUR SHIT”
 “oooooo you just jealous yes? soooo jealous”
 “WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING”
 “i never miss out on a chance to make money my friend! and tonight i am making fat bank!”
 Rajeesh looks over at the very looters who just trashed Terry’s vehicle.
 “you want a ride, ah? good prices, i get you to the best stores quick so you can steal from them”
 The men happily nod to themselves and get into Rajeesh’s taxi.
 “better luck next time my friend! or should i say... NOT MY FRIEND! HAH!”
 Rajeesh speeds off, but not before knocking another car off of the road and causing it to crash into the front doors of an orphanage.
 “jerard get back inside... we need to make it through the night alive…”
 “indeed”
----
 In the Praetor household, Faultina is staring out of the window, watching the chaos on the streets in shock. The TV is playing in the background.
 Velma comes running down the stairs and joins her.
 “what’s going on mom?”
 “velma stay upstairs! the town is panicking! there’s riots out there! where is your brother?”
 “how should i know? that little brat is probably out playing with his loser friends”
 Faultina gasps.
 “he can’t be outside right now it’s not safe for a young boy!”
 A man is thrown through their living room window. Glass shatters everywhere. The man lies on the floor in pain, blood gushing from his jaw.
 Irrumator appears.
 “taste that punk? that is the taste of DEFEAT”
 “IRRUMATOR WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING”
 “WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE BITCH? I’M DEFENDING THE HOUSEHOLD”
 Irrumator turns his attention back to the front yard.
 “come on step right up, who wants to try and vandalise my mailbox next?”
 “OUR SON IS OUT THERE IRRUMATOR”
 “GOOD. MAYBE IT’LL MAKE A MAN OUT OF HIM”
 “HE’S A CHILD”
 “IF HIS TRAINING CAN’T HELP HIM SURVIVE A RIOT THEN IT’S ALL BEEN WORTHLESS, TRUST ME HE’LL BE FINE, NOW GET INSIDE WOMAN”
 As a flustered Faultina backs down, Irrumator grabs a passing rioter in a chokehold.
 “HOORAH”
----
 Downtown, Pugnator is amidst the chaos with his friends.
 “BROOOOOOO THIS IS CRAZY”
 Julian ducks as a molotov cocktail is thrown over his head. It lights fire to a diner behind him.
 The owner, Dexter, steps out with a rifle in his hands.
 “WELL WHADDYA KNOW, I’M GONNA FIND OUT WHICH PUNK DID THAT”
 He lays eyes on Alsimi.
 “YOU? YOU LITTLE DELINQUENT”
 “me? no sir!”
 “QUIET! I’M GOING TO FIST FUCK YOU WITH ALL FOUR OF MY ARMS”
 Dexter aims his rifle at Alsimi.
 Brock leaps up into the air, kicking him down to the ground and defending his friend.
 “thank you brock”
 “don’t mention it! this is crazy! it’s not safe out here for you alsimi”
 “yeah alsimi you better run home”
 “it isn't safe for you either you idiot!”
 “alsimi, julian, get home to your families”
 Alsimi nods and rushes off.
 “come on julian, aren’t you worried about your rabbit?”
 “DAISY! DAISY I'M COMING”
 Pugnator watches as the two run off.
 “pugnator! there are criminals all over the streets and riots taking place, now is a chance for us to team up and hone our skills once again!”
 “sounds better than returning to my family”
 “THEN LET OUR SECOND OFFICIAL TEAM UP COMMENCE!”
----
 In his office at the Midnight Club, Mister Big observes the chaos in the streets from his window. Braces is on guard at the door. Jimmy Needles is also present.
 “that’s MY town they are out there trashing, MY businesses being raided… and WHAT ARE THE FUCKING POLICE FORCE DOING ABOUT IT?”
 “they are being overwhelmed boss, our boys can barely even keep the rioters from breaking into the club!”
 “no doubt he’ll be out there…”
 “boss?”
 “candy callum. this will have lured him out of hiding... a vigilante like him? he’ll be trying to stop the conflict and save lives... i bet he’ll be right in the middle of it all... and we’ll use that to our advantage... send some of the boys out there... capture the candy cane and bring him to me alive”
 A molotov cocktail is suddenly thrown up toward Mister Big’s window. It hits off of the window, leaving a large crack and landing below, setting fire to some of the plants outside of his club. Startled, he steps back, concerned for his own safety.
 “boss!”
 Jimmy rushes across the room to assist Mister Big, though a brick comes smashing through the window, smacking him right in the head. Jimmy collapses into a table, knocked out.
 Mister Big peeks out of the window.
 AssBeater420 stands among the rioters, a microphone in hand.
 “ay yo that’s for throwin’ this nigga outta your club you bald headass motherfucker”
 Mister Big is enraged by this.
 “that’s right i’m a fuckin superstar now bitchass. you like lady gaga? i piped her homie fr fr. peace out nigga les go my fans”
 AssBeater420 begins to rap to his fans, who have formed a protective shield around him while the riots go on. He and his group rush down the street, cheering.
 A furious Mister Big turns to Braces.
 “FIND ME CANDY CALLUM”
----
 At ‘The Real Weebs R Us’, Jerry screams as a group of looters break the window and enter the store.
 “no! please spare me!”
 The looters kick the boy to the ground, one of them raising their crowbar.
 Pugnator dives in and punches the looter in the face.
 Brock kicks another in the chest, flooring him. He approaches Jerry.
 “th--- thank you”
 “it is my duty as a vigilante in training to--”
 “BEHIND YOU”
Another looter charges at Brock with a baseball bat.
 Pugnator swiftly knocks them to the ground.
 “suck it loser”
 Brock offers Jerry a hand.
 Jerry takes it.
 “jerry you should get home to safety immediately”
 “i will not forget this act of kindness you losers have shown me today”
 Jerry rushes out of the store.
 “oh fuck that kid”
 “trust me pugnator, in saving our rival, we have now automatically--”
 “shown that we are superior to him in every way!”
 “...shown our true colours as selfless vigilantes”
 “same thing”
----
 Out on the street just below his post at the main entrance, Bob is trying to break up a fight at a grocery store.
 “stop this! as a sworn member of the neighbourhood watch, i will be forced to take serious action if you continue to contribute to this attack on the town”
 He readies his pike and points it at the men.
 Lego Joker steps forward from among them.
 “you know we live in a society, and i think that society thrives just fine without the useless neighbourhood watch”
 He draws his knife.
 “i’m gonna make you smile”
 Bob quickly swings the pike at Lego Joker’s hand, knocking the blade from it. He swiftly bashes a second looter, knocking them to the ground.
 “god i hate you! can’t you see we’re attacking a WOMAN’s grocery store? that’s right... she owns it... and get this... it’s with her HOMOSEXUAL FAGGOT brother… we’re on the same team you and i”
 Bruh Bot storms in, whacking all of the looters down with a stop sign that he tore from the ground.
 “eat metal bitch boy”
 “NO-- WAIT--”
 Bruh Bot brings the stop sign down on Lego Joker’s head, splattering his brains all over the pavement. The other looters flee in fear.
 “nice one bruh bot”
 “i will defend the neighbourhood at all costs”
 Candy Callum drops down from a nearby roof.
 “are you both doing okay here?”
 “sure are, what about you?”
 “i’ve been doing my best to break up as many fights as possible, but the situation is only getting worse. i have to get to the town hall, doctor reeves has informed me that it isn’t looking good over there!”
----
Outside of town hall, crowds of people are still fighting each other.
 Karen and a mob of angry citizens approach an electronics store.
 Fola stands in their way.
 “EVERYONE STOP THIS! WE HAVE TO ABIDE BY THE LAWS OUR TOWN HAS IN PLACE. WE HAVE TO ADHERE TO DEMOCRACY, BECOMING SAVAGES IS NOT AN OPTION!”
 “OH IT SURE FUCKING IS, MOVE OUT OF MY WAY SKANK”
 Karen pushes Fola, and then swings a piece of metal into the store’s window.
 “don’t be like her everyone, we have to use common sense--”
 People slowly begin to push past Fola until she is pushed to the ground and trampled. She is heard crying beneath the mob.
 At the town hall’s entrance, Monkey is fighting the rioters trying to breach the building on his own. He leaps up onto one, punching them in the face, leading to them stumbling down the building’s front steps.
 “ah he’ll be aight”
 “YOU SAVAGE, HOW DARE YOU, A SERVANT OF THE MAYOR, ATTACK A PERSON LIKE THAT!”
 “you better shut your ass up now, i’ve already beaten ten of you punks down”
 “you need to be put down you violent animal, you won’t stand in the way of the people any longer!”
 “OH NOW YOU’RE IN IT FOR IT BITCH BOY”
 Monkey lunges forward onto Jeremy, pinning him to the ground. He begins to attack him, but the rioters use this as a chance to overwhelm and push past Monkey. Soon enough, he is picked up and slammed into the wall.
 Jeremy sits back up and stands before the mob.
 “PUSH IN EVERYONE! TAKE THE TOWN HALL BY FORCE”
 Monkey’s unconscious body is thrown into a nearby bush as the mob begins to attack the barricades.
----
 Inside, Rogelio is standing in his office.
 Richard comes running in.
 “they are currently breaching the front doors, mr mayor”
 “this is not looking good... i hope monkey is alright... and my family… my beloved family... my wife... she must be so worried for me like i am for her”
 The phone on his desk rings. He picks it up.
 His wife Geraldine Cornflakes is on the line.
 “rogelio what is the fucking netflix password, i demand to know”
 “geraldine that’s hardly important right now, are you okay? are the kids safe?”
 “you better fucking survive rogelio, i want that netflix password as soon as you’re in the door”
 “of course my darling wife--”
 Geraldine hangs up.
 Rogelio sighs.
 “at least my family are okay... where is joe?”
 “i have no idea, he must’ve slipped out and gotten to safety”
 “well gentlemen, i think it's worth ensuring our own safety at this moment, wouldn’t you agree? thankfully, i prepared for this very scenario in advance”
 “you did?”
 “as the school principal, the students safety is my number one concern, and i apply that same mindset when serving you, mr mayor”
 Principal Sy Cotic approaches a metal cabinet in the office and takes out a key. He opens it, taking out a double barrel shotgun.
 “jesus”
 “like i said, safety is paramount”
 “i didn’t want it to come to this... i love this town… and it’s people... even if they hate me right now…”
 Quenton steps in.
 “mr mayor, i need you to sign this directive approving police violence in a time of emergency, we need to control the riots, and my force is ready to move i just need the go ahead”
 “...very well”
 Rogelio signs the paper.
 “dispatch the force”
----
 Bruce leads the police force down the street, consisting of a police tank, multiple cars, and a few SWAT vans. He walks proudly, holding a pair of shades, which he puts on over the pair he is already wearing.
 Officer Taits is walking alongside him glamorously. She puts on another layer of lipstick.
 “i’m ready to give it to them….”
 “ohhhhhhh yeahhhhhhhhhh... you heard the lady boys… GET OUT THERE AND BRING ORDER TO THIS TOWN”
 A large group of riot officers begin to march forward, armed with pepper spray, batons and riot shields. They immediately charge forward at the crowds in the street, leading to a large war breaking out.
----
 In the town hall, Quenton notices that the barricades at the front door have been breached. Crowds begin to swarm the building, some of them rushing right up the stairs.
 “DOWN WITH THE MAYOR”
 He rushes into the office.
 “THIS IS IT PEOPLE WE’VE GOT COMPANY”
 Callum grapples onto the window ledge. He taps it a few times.
 Rogelio turns around.
 “candy callum?”
 “the rogue vigilante? that makes matters even worse!”
 “no no! we should hear him out!”
 Richard opens the window for Callum, who remains on the window ledge.
 “chief quenton, before you try to take me in, i was wrongfully framed and i need you to believe me there... i heard you were all in trouble, and i’m not the kind of vigilante who’s going to just give up on my town”
 “my hands are full either way, if you can help us clean this mess up, we’ll be in your debt... please... get the mayor to safety”
 “mr mayor i can take you up to the roof if you hold onto me”
 Rogelio nods, looking to the others.
 “what about you?”
 Sy Cotic readies his double barrel shotgun.
 “we’ll hold off those nasty rioters of course”
 “go with candy callum mr mayor, i swear to you, he is innocent, as your advisor, take my word on that, he will help you”
 “very well…”
 Callum takes hold of Rogelio and grapples up onto the roof from the window ledge.
 Sy Cotic turns back to the door, hearing the rioters approaching.
 “godspeed gents”
----
 On the roof, Callum and Rogelio get a clear view of the battle taking place on the streets.
 “my god... it’s horrible…”
 “is there any way you can bring a stop to this mr mayor?”
 “perhaps... many of the citizens may want to see my head on a pike right now... but if i could just be given the chance to speak... to get my words out... i could bring a stop to this with the help of the police force and you rounding up criminals”
 “then we just have to get you to the broadcast station”
 “allow us to be of assistance!”
 Brock climbs up onto the roof, panting.
 “we saw the commotion here at the town hall and figured our services could be of use!”
 Pugnator climbs up after him.
 “you guys are kids from the high school right? i remember giving my presentation to you”
 “we are indeed! we found it very inspiring and are out here tonight as hopeful vigilantes trying to help!”
 “i’m not a hopeful vigilante!”
 “such details do not matter right now pugnator! what matters is we help save our town and take the mayor where he needs to go!”
 “okay... you boys have to get mayor rogelio to the broadcast station on the edge of town... i'm entrusting him to you”
 “what about you?”
 “i’m going to meet you there, but i have to do all i can to stop this madness in the streets i’m one of the only ones equipped to do so”
 “very well!”
 “i must insist you do not leave me under the protection of two mere boys--”
 “quit your complaining mr mayor we’ve got this”
 “you’ll be fine mayor rogelio, and i’ll meet you at the station. off you go”
 While Pugnator and Brock escort Rogelio off the roof, Callum grapples to a nearby building.
 He lands, overlooking the madness. He spots a woman being chased down a back alley by a thug. As he goes to grapple down to her, he is snuck up on and grabbed.
 “you picked the wrong place to land little guy... made my job a whole lot easier”
 Braces grabs the candy cane in a chokehold until he passes out.
 “time to see what the boss thinks of you”
----
Category:Transcripts
Category:Season 1