Goofballs/Septem City Official Law Handbook

Septem City
Official Law Handbook
Septem City is governed under the law of the U.A. and the following set of guidelines.
#Those under 13 years of age shall not be permitted into the city unless accompanied by a parent or legal guardian over 13 years of age.
#All registered citizens of the city who have lived in the city for at least 2 years must sign an agreement stating they will forever be loyal to seven, and will never follow the eight. If one does not sign this agreement within 2 weeks of receiving it, they will be escorted out of the city.
#There shall be no tomfoolery within the interior of the City Hall building. Those visiting the building must have the intention of business, unless in the case of a social interaction. Cases in which the City Hall building may not be used for includes, but is not limited to, hanging out, loitering, sleeping, protesting, thievery, murder, arson and unsolicited persecution.
#Explosives shall not be utilized within 150 square miles of the City Hall building, especially those of high capacity. Fireworks and other festive explosives that are used in events observed by City Hall are exempt.
#The sauce (refer to Harmful Substances) shall not be used under any circumstance or variation. Abusers will be prosecuted. In the case a member of City Hall uses the sauce, they shall have their position in City Hall permanently removed, and serve 90 days of community service.
#Ranking of single-digit numbers, as met by a community consensus, shall be followed by all citizens from greatest to least in the following order only: 7, 3, 5, 4, 1, 2, 9, 6, 0, 8. 
#Seven.
#
#Full House, as the voted top television program of Septem City, shall be aired on all television and radio networks for at least two episodes per week after 6:00 pm CT but before 11:59 pm CT.
#The contact email listed on the official Septem City website is only to be used for business and government issues, comments and questions. Not to ask Violet out on a date.
#Only Specific Mills brand cereal shall be sold in supermarkets and grocery stores. If one sells a cereal not of the Specific Mills brand, they shall be prosecuted, and the item shall be put off sale.
#There is to be no bickering or arguing between City Hall members in the office and conference rooms. This also applies to, but is not limited to: throwing paper airplanes, shooting spitballs and tauntingly saying the word “heck”. Repeat offenders will be given a good scolding.
#The number eight (8) is essentially non-existent. In the case a child turns 8 years of age, they shall remain classified 7 for another year, then turn 9 the next year. Children shall not be taught the number eight in education, and shall be represented by a dashed line when absolutely necessary (represented by -- in ASCII characters).
Following all above guidelines is the bare minimum of remaining a citizen in Septem City. Please take note that these guidelines may change, and in the case of that, we will send a letter of notice to all that are affected. Thank you.
All guidelines are enforced by U.A. and Septem City law officials, including City Hall members, patrollers and vigilantes. Any concerns or questions about the guidelines and other law inquiries should be left in your own mind because no one else wants to hear them.
As of 30 January 2015. 
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Category:2015
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