Shift Critter Reads the TV News

Shift Critter: Today’s the day!
Uglydolls: Oy! You stole our song title!
Shift critter: I don't care
Announcer: 44 Cats, coming to Nickelodeon May 25!
Shift Critter: That Show is Going to Suck cause it will give me bad memories about Catscratch! Winx Club is Way Better!
 
Announcer: T.O.T.S, Coming to Disney Junior June 14!
Shift Critter: This Show is Gonna Suck because It will rip off Top Wing, which is way better than this!
The cadets: Hey! We don't even deliver babies. 
Jenna: Shift critter please don't you stupid.
Announcer: Rainbow Butterfly Unicorn Kitty! Coming to Children’s Hucknall Television June 17!
Shift Critter: Yes! Finally! Another Only Good Children’s Hucknall Television Show I like!
Linny: Why the heck are you excited for RBUK?
Shift Critter: Cause it’s way better than Unikitty and Paintbrush Zebra Ladybug Kitty!
RBUK cat: Thanks sweetheart!
Announcer: Pets Not Meant for the World! Coming to Children’s Hucknall Television in July!
Shift Critter: That show is going to suck because It’s even worse than Uglydolls and Whisker Haven Tales with the Palace Pets!
Uglydolls and palace pets: HEY!