PTDS - Post Talnec's Disjunction Syndrome

Preceded By: Season Fourteen, Season Finale: Fuck You. Anything Else?
Followed By: Season Fifteen, Episode Two: Fly Without Rhythm
Introducing: Das Rutshig, Bandit Steve, The Girl with No Name
==Summary==
: The Swiftest Thought speeds away from Burkina, its crew still in a daze after the shock of the last fight. They can't afford the time to go back east, so they circle for a few minutes while the officers try to figure out what to do.
: Ashra's phone rings. It's Albert Greenwood. Last night a message appeared on Tanaki's Wall, scrawled in human blood. It reads:
:: Greetings saboteurs,
::In honor of your triumphs against me I would like to cordially invite you to a little party I have thrown together. I would give you the date and time but I’m afraid you’d invite other guests and I would really like to keep this reasonably small . As such, I have torn your invitation asunder. Do not worry, I am certain you can piece it back together. You have thirty days from when the writer of this message is dead. On your way, I will be watching you. If I detect even a hint that you are bringing unexpected guests along with you, I am afraid I may have to cancel. 
::Ah, I almost forgot; I know you’re busy so I prepared some party favors for you if you do come. For the cleric, I will spare your homeland. For the illithid, your mother would be happy to hear from you. The spellsword may see his lover and child. For the others, I’ll be sure to have something waiting for you as soon as I can.
::Remember, time is key.
:It is followed by the code:
::D vzqepla z recnlpn al z mlb D'ue peuk keeq. Lr rrej ej slx rqsj xzn ebzjlc xj klq pla qdc qexe hhdv peuek euzeh six. Sic xzj mkda rzepb crhzev crdv ej, bkdhheq rzcr cidcv epecveqhe qd eepa. Xj ren qpzet rzcv sic geeq.
: This was apparently written by a human with his own life's blood. The human's body was found nearby, and there is currently quite a commotion at the Wall.
: Ashra thanks Greenwood for the information. Leilah Maloch tells Greenwood that the information he gave the party about the Bloodfoe's location led them straight into a trap. The Black Hand saw the party coming and had an extremely powerful cleric there to meet them. She warns that Greenwood's organization may have been compromised, as the information he's been giving the party often leads them into more trouble. Greenwood acknowledges the possibility with a grave face.
: Ashra thanks him for the information and promises to keep in touch. The call ends.
: Ashra looks at the code for a few minutes, but doesn't try anything. It's not in her own cypher, at least. She's too upset after the Disjunction fight to do more, and the codes she's seen lately have mostly been too difficult for her. Liar, appearing today as an aasimar woman with a name no one remembers, points out that "eepa" does not match any Common orthographic patterns. Leilah asks Ashra to note for future reference that the party should make note of all the people with whom they've had contact, because the Common portion of the letter does indicate some knowledge of who they are.
: Ashra asks Leilah to hand her the magic compass. It points into the Ornan Jungle, towards the location where her mother was last seen.
: Uninterested in the code party, Icania Vandril starts talking to his axe. The axe talks back. Mostly it cares about its maker, Astaroth, and about getting to hit things. He warns Ashra and Leilah that this axe isn't meant to be chatty.
: Tamiko's symbol appears, and beneath it appears the hint:
:: CWOOFOOW?
:: 26.1345
: This is almost complete gibberish, as the party figures out after a couple of minutes.
: Leilah asks to hold the compass herself. It points into the Firemore Desert. She is in a very bad mood. She prays to her mother to see if her homeland is safe, and receives the impression of happiness.
: Ashra prays to Ethan Dragonslayer and receives the message, "Kill dragons ... kill hot dragons!" So that's business as normal.
: Felix Fineas Faust prays to Boccob, who doesn't care.
: The party needs to figure out where to go, since Ashra has given up on the puzzle for now and no one seems to be making any headway. The "lover and child" mentioned in the message probably refer to Aether and Hemera the Loved, since almost anyone would assume Aether and Cicero Tiberius Shadolan to be romantically involved. (Including Aether, probably.) Ashra asks Leilah to Send to Aether. She doesn't have that ready, but she can easily scry on her.
: Aether's location is blocked by a Screen, but Leilah disbelieves it easily. Aether sits in a pitch-black cave with her hands bound behind her back. She is screaming obscenities. The brownish-green moss on the walls marks her location as the Underdark, but doesn't narrow it down further than that. There are many passages leading away. Ashra looks at Leilah's scrying pool and points out that Aether is sitting in a crude teleportation circle. Leilah and her chicken identify it as a very powerful but haphazard magic, with the runes made of poured silver.
: Icania takes the compass from Leilah, and finds that it points northeast.
: Leilah tries another scry, to look for the baby, but it fails. Galland the Lucky falls asleep. A Discern Location targeting Aether fails, likely indicating she is Mind Blanked.
: Everyone perks up for a moment with the vague sense that something just happened. Ashra finds no extra consciousnesses on board. Icania finds nothing with his True Seeing. Ashra looks outside with her spyglass and finds a blonde woman running slowly but very steadily across the hills. In the Mirror of True Seeing, she is invisible, just a little dust on the wind. This makes her probably either a very old undead or an illusion. There is no visible caster for the illusion.
: There is a short discussion of what the party has learned which ends in a mess of twos -- everyone gets together and sings Kumbaya, Leilah now wakes up every morning in a small crater, and Icania believes people think he's a murderer. Someone finally decides they don't know of any entrances to the Underdark.
: Ashra finds an extra consciousness on board. It is fairly intelligent and resists her attempt to read its mind. She instead traces it to the cargo hold and leads the party down to check on it.
: The consciousness belongs to a sentient sword, which flops around on the floor spouting greetings. Galland picks it up and immediately bonds with it, waving it around happily. The sword introduces itself as Das Rutshig. It wants to keep the world from ending, and it isn't really sure how it got here, beyond that a female angel carried it in. It really, really does not want to die. Galland likes it and wants to keep it. Ashra and Leilah are concerned it's overwhelming Galland's mind.
: Icania recognizes Das Rutshig as a sword he improved for one of Grax's Warforged generals. He didn't make it, and it's clearly had some modifications since he last saw it, but he can confirm it has no ill will towards the party and no ability to influence Galland. It also doesn't get too picky about human rights violations.
: Ashra and Leilah agree to let it stay conditionally, but they want to sweep it with Analyze Dweomer before they accept it. Ashra offers to carry it, since she has no motivation to keep it and a very strong will, but it's more interested in a powerful wielder. Ashra is physically strong, Leilah has a very similar weapon, and Galland is already on the BFF track, so Das Rutshig picks him. Ashra says he'll be responsible if he does anything under its influence, and that it'll cost shares if he keeps it. Galland agrees and takes custody of the sword.
: The party hears loud engines and looks outside at the giant, clunky dwarven ship chugging past. It has no name. (It is not part of the collective.) It looks like it came from a junkyard and should've stayed there. The party saw it once when shopping, but turned it down for being too crappy. The Thought ascends above the cloud cover to avoid dealing with the ship.
: Icania sends a magical bat over to the dwarf ship to investigate. It is run by a crew of six people: dwarves, gnomes, and one halfling, none known to the party. None seem particularly competent except one dwarf, and they aren't a large enough crew to comfortably run that ship.
: Meanwhile on the ground, the blonde woman takes out a long musket and shoots out one of the engines of the dwarf ship. She puts the musket back and takes off running again.
: Icania finds an unused crappy magic something lying around and makes a mirror that can Greater Scry once per day. He offers it to Leilah, who can scry longer and better all day long, and she hands it to Ashra, who can't scry at all.
: The dwarf ship has apparently encountered engine trouble, though the party doesn't know why. This looks amusing, so Ashra tunes in with the scry and the party gathers around with some (vegan) popcorn.
: The adventurers appear to have stolen this semi-functional clunker straight from the junkyard. They're too incompetent to be evil. They call each other Niflin, Rosepetal, Kafka, Darla, and Darkesh.
: Two of the three engines are on fire. The gnomes put one of the engines out. One gnome tries for another engine and is himself set on fire. Another helps him and instead catches on fire himself. Another one throws liquid on the first two, then discovers this liquid was gasoline. One of the others pulls the first two out of the fire successfully and throws holy water over the whole group.
: Meanwhile, the one competent dwarf is watching with amusement.
: One of the gnomes puts an important piece in the right place, but fastens it with nails instead of screws. He tries to get the old dwarf to help, but he refuses. The young adventurers manage to put out one of the fires, but one engine is still burning. They put it out, set it on fire, put it out, set the other one on fire again, and then notice they're thirty feet above the ground at this point.
: The blonde girl looks up. She didn't hit them this hard... She sees a scry sensor and pulls her hood up over her face.
: An engine falls off the ship. A large chunk of the ship falls off. The other two engines fall off. About half the party takes cover before it hits the ground, and that half survives the fall.
: The Company shuts off the scry and decides to get some sleep safe above the cloud cover. Faust casts the Pimphaus, and the party sets a watch. During the night, Galland gets an arcane mark reading "Kick Me" on his back. Nerdin now apologizes to everyone he injures.
: In the morning, Leilah casts Analyze Dweomer to check for bugs or curses. Das Rutshig has no arcane mark and no desire to control its host. Galland has the arcane mark, but everyone else is normal.
: Discern Location on Hemera also fails. Ashra suggests searching for Aether's personal dagger. It is in a pawn shop in Prospero called the Silver Sword.
: Leilah prays for confirmation that Anahita is okay, and hears that she is.
: Boccob replies to Faust with a very long silence.
: Scrying on Aether again now reveals that she is bound unconscious in a brick cellar with a bunch of unmarked old liquor barrels.
: Faust decides that the girl on the ground, who is still running, looks interesting. They start communicating by whispering wind:
::“Do you flee the moon?”
::“I flee things as I find it necessary. Does the moon merit it?”
::“No; not if you value this world. Those who flee the moon seek to destroy it."
::"Then I have no desire to flee; this world and its longevity are things I wish to preserve. Who are you?”
::“Felix Fineas Faust – a flying friend.”
::“I apologize for shooting down your ship. I have important places to be."
::“Worry not – not ours. Where is your destination?"
::“I seek the son whose eyes will never leave you.”
::“We would like to speak with you further. We will figure out a method of conversation.”
::“What makes our current method of speech unacceptable?”
::“Brevity; lack of collabaration; distance; running out of spells.”
::“I understand. Of course, you must also understand why I am cautious.”
: Ashra isn't sure they should be talking to her at all, and prays to Ethan for guidance. He answers, "This lich has never harmed me." With this endorsement, Ashra agrees to hover and let the party speak with her. Leilah and Faust Project Image down to where she stands.
: The girl knows Leilah is "the cleric", and Leilah knows the "totally normal necklace" is a phylactery, which puts their interactions off to a Fairly Bad Start. The girl knows the answer to the puzzle, and Leilah accidentally admits that the party doesn't. The girl is hostile to Leilah but friendly to Faust, and offers the puzzle's solution for safe passage to the "party". Faust makes a temporary sheet of paper with Prestidigitation, and the girl writes down the answer.
Faust and Leilah show the solution to Ashra. The puzzle is a keyed Ceasar cypher with the key word "time" and all the letters shifted by one. This reveals the message, written backwards. It ultimately decodes to:
::I foresaw a prophet of a god I’ve never seen. To meet me you must pay homage to my son for his eyes will never leave you. you may find great wealth with me, selling that which elsewhere is free. My pet bears what you seek.
: Ashra admits that the solution is consistent and that it is highly unlikely that there would be two valid solutions. Someone Dimension Doors the girl onto the ship.
: The girl has no name, though she'll answer to Gunslinger. She grudgingly submits to Analyze Dweomer, which shows she is well-equipped and well-protected, enough so to impress Leilah.
: A wagon of weak adventurers trundles by; the party swoops up and away again. They start flying in the same direction Gunslinger was walking.
: Since the party is flying over the Firemore Desert, Galland brings up that great wyrm he wants to kill. Das Rutshig recognizes what he's talking about -- the Dog of the Desert, a very old blue dragon that has killed many people. Ashra says maybe but we are under time pressure here.
: Faust prays to Boccob again and may no longer cast spells when it is snowing. Well, we didn't have time to go to Point North anyway.
: As the Thought flies over the desert, Ashra and Gunslinger watch many caravans crawling below them in the same direction. Then the caravans stop: a small line of demons is holding them back, murdering anyone who tries to get by. There are many weak Nesferati and a single molydeus. Leilah recognizes this as Bad Shit and suggests the party avoid it; Icania knows way too much about the damn thing as the Thought zooms past.
: Through her spyglass, Ashra watches the molydeus notice the ship and then go back to eating people.
: Meanwhile on the ground, a young rogue tumbles and dashes over the bodies of his comrades, grabbing two magic spoons and a nonmagical lantern before getting smacked by a demon. An amazingly convenient random magical effect teleported him onto the nearest ship.
: This rogue looks around at the entire current staff of The Company leveling their weapons at him on the bridge of the fanciest ship he's ever seen. He raises his hands and is immediately high-fived by Galland. Cicero puts a sandwich in his hand. No one else lowers their weapon.
: He introduces himself as Einsof. He is a blind archer of great skill. Icania takes one of the Spoons of Sustenance Bandit Steve just looted and turns it into a Ring of Sustenance, possibly by bending it into a circle. He hands it back.
: Icania leads him into a small cell that's apparently on the ship, then removes the door. During the night Einsof starts phasing through the floor a bit, and Icania sticks his head through the wall and tells him he'll be fine.
: The Swiftest Thought flies on towards an unknown destination ...
: (We didn't fight the molydeus, but if we did: Massive buffing, Gunslinger almost drops it with a single headshot, Ashra teleports Leilah next to it, Leilah finishes it off, combat finishes in about ten seconds.)
Category:Episodes
Category:Season Fifteen Episodes