Dinkles Dinkles Little Star/Transcript

The following is a transcript for the episode "Dinkles Dinkles Little Star".
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(Butterflies fly toward the camera while Mr. Dinkles watches them. Biggie is trying to get his attention.)
Biggie: (Snapping his fingers) Mr. Dinkles, please snap out of it. This is what I mean. Ever since Mr. Dinkles’s friends turned to butterflies, he’s been in a pit of low self-esteem.
Mr. Dinkles: Meep.
Biggie: See? He’s a mess! (He begins to cry and hugs Mr. Dinkles.) Oh, Mr. Dinkles.
Poppy: You’re right, Biggie. I’ve never heard him so out of sorts.
Branch: You guys got all that from “meep”?
Biggie: You didn’t?
Poppy: He meeped it pretty clearly, Branch.
Branch: Look, just give Dinkles some space, Biggie. He’ll bounce back eventually.
Biggie: Ooh, you’re right, Branch. I just need to find a way to boost Mr. Dinkles’s confidence and make him turn back to the man about town we know and love. (He hugs Mr. Dinkles.)
Branch: Wait, that’s the opposite of what I-
Poppy: I agree! Ah, great idea, Branch. And actually, Gristle was just telling me about something that could be the perfect way to bring back his swagger. (In Bergen Town, some Bergens are bringing their pets to a pet show. Inside, a bird bites a Bergen’s face.)
Bergen #1: Ow! (King Gristle Jr. carries Branch, Poppy, and Biggie to the stadium.)
King Gristle Jr.: The West Bergen Town Pet Show. (The camera shows some Bergens interacting with their pets.) A contest that answers the question of all owners’ minds- is my pet fancier than everyone else’s?
Biggie: Wow!
Poppy: Aw!
Branch: This is so wrong.
King Gristle Jr.: The winning pet is crowned “Best In Show” and takes home the Golden Gristle, named after my father, who practically gave his right arm for this event. (Groth turns the trophy around, showing his father’s arm being bitten by an alligator.) Also literally.
Biggie: Oh, my. The Golden Gristle. Getting one of those would put the pep in your step, eh, Mr. Dinkles?
Mr. Dinkles: Meep.
Biggie: No, I don’t think he can win. I know you can win.
Groth: Win? (coughs and chuckles) A mutt like that can’t win. (He kneels down.) Where’s his highfalutin hairstyle, his holier-than-thou gaze?
Poppy: Well, well, well, classic Groth, always looking down on others. But who are you judge, Groth? Who are you to judge?
Groth: I’m the judge. (He shows his badge.)
Poppy: Ah. I’ll be quiet, then.
Bernice: (scoffs) Does this worm even have a talent?
Biggie: Course he does. Let’s show ‘em, Mr. D! (He puts Mr. Dinkles down and they dance.) A 5, 6, 7, 8, and a-step and a-step, and up and down and turn, turn… (Branch does a facepalm. The Bergens can be heard laughing. This causes Biggie and Mr. Dinkles to stop dancing.)
Bernice: (scoffs) That’s not a talent. These are talents. (A dog jumps in the air to grab a bone, a Bergen puts a blindfold on his pig and it throws axes at a target, and another dog plays music on three cups.)
Biggie: Wow!
Bernice: Oh, yeah. That routine won Num-nums “Best In Show” last year. But good luck with your dance. (She and the rest of the Bergens laugh and leave.)
Groth: Just to be clear, we were laughing at you, not with you. (He laughs and leaves again.)
Biggie: Guys, can I be honest? These other pets were really talented, and I’m not sure how Mr. Dinkles can compete. You’re amazing! (whispering) No, really, we need help.
Branch: Well, you know, Biggie, Mr. Dinkles doesn’t have to compete.
Biggie: (gasps) You mean back out?! He’d think I don’t believe in him. I believe in you! No. Dinkles will win.
Poppy: Yeah, he’ll win, Branch. We just need to find him a new talent.
Nangus: Someone say a pet needs a talent? (He appears from the shadows.) Then you, my little fuzz nuggets, have come to the right guy.
Branch: Uh, we didn’t come to you. You were just weirdly standing in the shadows.
Nangus: Or was I? No, I was.
Poppy: Hey, you’re… uh… Nangus, the Bergen dungeon master, right?
Nangus: Well, that’s my nine to five. But from five to nine, I train pets! (He hoots like an owl and an eagle lands on his arm.)
Poppy: Whoa! Aw. Well, hello there, birdie. (The eagle looks away.) Ew.
Branch: This guy’s pretty full of himself, even for a bird.
Nangus: You would be, too if you won the West Bergen Pet Show so many times, they stopped letting you enter. (He places cards on the eagle’s beak. He then hoots and the bird goes through the cards.)
Biggie: Ooh! (The camera zooms to reveal the cards formed into a train.)
Nangus: And if you like, I can train your petite pal there, too.
Biggie: Wha- Mr. Dinkles doesn’t need training. Yes, absolutely, train him. (At the castle, Mr. Dinkles is sitting on a log.)
Nangus: Let’s start with something simple. (He holds up a hoop.) Jump through the hoop. (Mr. Dinkles tries to jump, but falls on his face.)
Poppy: Ooh.
Nangus: I see the problem now. He has no confidence. Mr. Dinkles, to be a winner, you must believe you’re a winner. (He puts Mr. Dinkles on another log and plays a film.) This is the universe, and at the center of it is you! Because you can do anything!
Branch: Doesn’t this seem a little brainwashy?
Biggie: Let the man work.
Nangus: … has ever known! (The film shows Mr. Dinkles avoiding obstacles.) There are no obstacles to your success! You are as powerful as a lion riding a shark into a volcano of awesome! You are the best! You are the best! You are the best! You are the best! (Mr. Dinkles gets serious.) Dinkles’ training is complete. Behold. (He hits a bell. Mr. Dinkles uses a nunchuck to chop wood.)
Biggie: Oh! (Mr. Dinkles jumps onto a skateboard and flies through hoops on fire. Branch gasps in amazement. Mr. Dinkles flies into the air and lands on a brick wall, causing it to break.) Ooh…
Mr. Dinkles: Meep.
Biggie: Golden Gristle, here we come! (Later, at the West Bergen Town Pet Show, the Bergens are ready to compete.)
King Gristle Jr.: (Through the microphone) Ladies and gentlemen, the West Bergen Town Pet Show is under way! Round 1 tests form- regal bearing, shiny coat, and most importantly, strong butts. (Groth tests the pets’ results as they turn around to show their butts.)
Groth: Hm, what have we here? (Mr. Dinkles shows him his butt.) Very confident! (The audience cheers.)
King Gristle Jr.: Round 2 tests posing. Which pet has the look that makes us feel like dirt in its presence? (The pig poses for the camera.)
Groth: No. (The eagle poses for the camera.) Kill me. (Mr. Dinkles is next.) Hold the phone! (As the camera takes a picture of Mr. Dinkles, he makes a kissing face.) It’s like he sees my very soul, and… and he’s not impressed! Perfect score! (The audience cheers again.)
Biggie: You were sensational, Mr. Dinkles!
Poppy: (With her fists in the air) Whoo! Yeah! All you have to do now is score well in the talent round, and you’re a lock for “Best In Show”! (She tries to pet Mr. Dinkles, but he looks away.) Ew. (She tries several more times and Mr. Dinkles continues to look away from her.)
Branch: Biggie, is it just me, or is Dinkles, like, bird-level full of himself?
Biggie: Oh. No, no, I’m sure he’s just tired from the long day.
Bergen #2: Pardon me. It was a true honor to compete against your pet. Would he mind giving us an autograph?
Biggie: Well, of course. He’d love to, wouldn’t you, Mr. Dinkles?
Mr. Dinkles: Meep. (The Bergen’s ostrich squawks.)
Biggie: (gasps) Don’t say that! He has a very pretty face. And I’m sure his mother is lovely. (The ostrich squawks again and puts its head in the ground.)
Bergen #2: Sebastian, no! (He pulls his ostrich’s head out of the ground.) Don’t go to your dark place again! That pet of yours is an animal! An animal! (He walks away.)
Biggie: What has gotten into you?
Branch: It’s not his fault, Biggie. Nangus’s training is making him think he’s better than anyone.
Poppy: Wrong again, Branch. It’s Nangus’s training that’s making him think he’s better than everyone.
Branch: OK, that’s what I just said.
Poppy: We have to find Nangus and see if he can reverse this before it’s too late.
Biggie: You mean… drop out of the contest? But if Mr. Dinkles doesn’t win the Golden Gristle… (He imagines the Bergens booing him and Mr. Dinkles.)
King Gristle Jr.: In a disappointing turn of events, Mr. Dinkles forfeited the final event and lost the Golden Gristle! (Rain begins to fall.)
Mr. Dinkles: You didn’t stand by me, Biggie, and now my self-esteem is lost forever. (He falls out of Biggie’s arms.)
Biggie: NOOOOOOOO!!! (We go back to reality.) Huh?
King Gristle Jr.: All finalists report to the show floor for the talent event.
Biggie:  Let’s go, Mr. Dinkles.
Poppy: But, Biggie…
Biggie: Sorry. He needs that trophy. (On the stage, a white pig dances to a Bergen playing an accordion.)
King Gristle Jr.: I can’t decide what this makes me feel more… irritation or boredom. (His face falls on the table.) It’s boredom. (Biggie is seen behind the curtains.)
Biggie: You’re next, Mr. Dinkles. This is going to be your finest moment. I’m sure of it.
Bernice: I don’t understand. (The camera shows her pet holding still in front of a food bowl.) What’s wrong, Num-nums? (Her pet growls and pushes its food bowl away.) Why? Why do you treat me like this? You used to be sweet… before you won that Golden Gristle. (She shows pictures of her pet.) Remember her?! I want this Num-nums back! (Her pet bites the pictures and she begins to cry.) Num-nums!
Biggie: How awful. We could never end up like that, could we, Mr. Dinkles? (He sees that Mr. Dinkles is gone. He is seen coming out on the stage.)
King Gristle Jr.: Next up, Mr. Dinkles!
All: Dinkles! Dinkles! Dinkles!
King Gristle Jr.: This is it! If he wins the Golden Gristle, his life changes forever… (His voice echoes in Biggie’s mind.)
Biggie: Wait! Mr. Dinkles, no! (He runs off the stage. Mr. Dinkles uses his nunchucks and jumps, but Biggie catches him.) Sorry, but we need to go undo your training right now. (He looks at the trophy.) Forget the trophy. We don’t need it.
Bergen #3: Let Dinkles do his thing!
Mr. Dinkles: Meep.
Biggie: (gasps) Where on Earth did you learn that word?
Bergen #4: Come on! Get on with it!
Bergen #5: Amuse us! (Mr. Dinkles still does nothing.)
Biggie: Fine. If you won’t go with me, you leave me only one choice. 5, 6, 7, 8! (He starts dancing.) Come on, Mr. D! Snap out of it and shake that thing!
Bergen #6: Get off the stage!
Poppy: Come on. We’ve got to help him. (She and Branch jump out of their seats.) Come on, Mr. Dinkles.
Branch: (As he and Poppy start dancing) Yeah. Meep, meep, Mr. Dinkles.
Biggie: Please, Mr. D! This is who you really are. This is who you really are! This is who you really are!
Mr. Dinkles: Meep. (He changes back to his usual hat and starts dancing.)
Biggie: (Jumping in the air) Yaaaaaaaay! (The audience boos at the Trolls.)
King Gristle Jr.: This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in all my year of commentating! (He lies down on the table.) So many feels. (Poppy, Branch, Biggie, and Mr. Dinkles continue dancing as popcorn falls around them. After that, Groth is giving the trophy to Bernice.)
Groth: And the winner of the Golden Gritsle is Num-nums. (The Bergens cheer for Bernice.)
Branch: Sorry Dinkles didn’t win, Biggie.
Biggie: Oh, that’s OK. I think I learned an important lesson today. A lesson about… Well, it’s… um…
Mr. Dinkles: Meep.
Biggie: Poetically said, Mr. D. That is the perfect way to sum it all up.
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