A Very Stick 10 Character Development Christmas/Script

A VERY STICK 10 CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT CHRISTMAS
by Ancy
DECEMBER 21st
Vilgax and Ben are standing outside the back door of a chic French restaurant called Le Chique Restaurantique. They're both wearing nice suits (well, Vilgax is, Ben is just wearing a bowtie because he doesn't have a body). 
(Vilgax): So you're really doing it?
(Ben): Yep. I have no idea why.
(Vilgax): What, you're proposing to Looma while you don't even know why?
(Ben): Well, of course I do! It's just... She makes me all warm inside, you know? It's like... It's like when she's next, I'm not a crime-fighting superhero anymore. I'm just Ben. I never had that with Kai or Julie, or any girl. But I don't know if I'm ready...
Vilgax puts his hand on Ben's shoulder.
(Vilgax): Ben, I've watched you grow up from a 10-year-old bratty kid I was trying to kill into a 21-year-old slighty less bratty adult. You've always been immature and irresponsible, but not around this girl. Take it from a guy who's been stalking you for 11 years; You're ready. Now tie that knot.
(Ben): Thanks, Vilgax. I don't say it a lot, but... You're a good friend. Maybe even my best.
(Vilgax): Really!? WOWIE ZOWIE WOWIE! CAN I BE YOUR BEST MAN!?
(Ben): Eh, what the Hell. Why not.
(Vilgax): WOOOOOOOOOOOO
Vilgax jumps around like a Japanese schoolgirl. 
Cut to Ben, Vilgax, Looma and Psyphon eating inside. Ben is sweating like, a lot, man.
(Looma): Do you like your fish, Ben?
(Ben): W-well, y-y-y-y-y'know, it's uh-uh-uh-uh-uh--
(Psyphon): Oh, for Gabe's sake. 
Psyphon stomps on Ben's foot.
(Ben) AHHH LOOMA WILL YOU BE MY WIFE
Suddenly it's completely silent in the restaurant. Looma is staring at Ben, as is pretty much everyone in the restaurant.
(Looma): What did you just say?
(Ben): Well, y'know, if you want to, I mean it's your choice, because really if you--
(Looma): Ben.
(Ben): Don't say no.
(Looma): Of course I'll be your wife!
(Ben): It's okay, Looma, I totally understand-- WAIT WHAAAAAAT
Ben and Looma start smooching the shit out of each other. 
(Vilgax): Aw, that's so romantic!
(Psyphon): Remember when you proposed to me while I was dying under a mountain of trophies?
(Vilgax): Don't ruin it, Psyphon.
THEME SONG
SAIGON, VIETNAM, 1971
A morning in Saigon. A young Max (about 26 years old) wakes up in a small camp off the coast of a river. Gunfire and explosions are heard in the background, as Max sits on his bed with a cigarette between his fingers.
(Max): Saigon... Shit. I'm still in Saigon...
Max walks out of his tent and into the outside of Saigon. Gunfire and explosions aren't very frequent, as it's just the early hours of morning. Japs sleep too, y'know. Watching over the Saigon landscape outside are a young Matt Ninesister and Sergeant Twice Nightly.
(Max): Good morning Matt, Dick.
(Nightly): Good morning Private Tennyson, you sleep well?
(Max): How could I not with such comfy beds and lovely sounds of nature like gunfire and Apaches flying over?
(Nightly): Very funny. Eat your breakfast, Max, Ninesister and Fincher are heading out in fifteen. I need you to check on that old hut.
(Max): What hut?
(Matt): The one with the wounded soldiers, ya dingus! Man, you are such a bad exposition device. 
(Max): That's not true, young MATT NINESISTER, who was the VILLAIN in a SPECIAL but now we're YOUNG and FRIENDS! Isn't that right, SERGEANT TWICE NIGHTLY?
(Nightly): Yeah yeah, whatever. Just get to killing Japs already. Also, get all your Apocalypse Now jokes out of your system now before you ham them in later.
(Max): I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
(Matt): Charlie don't surf.
(Max): The horror, the horror.
(Matt): Saigon, shit, I'm still in--
(Max): I already did that one.
(Nightly): Cut it out!
(Matt): Alright, let's go, grandpa.
(Max): What did you call me?
(Matt, with Ben's voice): I said wake up, grandpa!
Max wakes up from his dream. Ben is standing over him.
(Ben): Grandpa! Finally. Wanna come over for dinner tonight?
(Max): You couldn't just have called me?
(Ben): Called you for what?
(Max): Dinner!
(Ben): But we're already having dinner.
Max looks around. He's at Ben's house, and it's nighttime. 
(Max): ...I'm getting old.
Cut the Chimerian Minivan. Vilgax opens the door.
(Vilgax): Good news, Psyphie! My parents gave me my allowance, and now we have enough money to rebuild the Chimerian Stapler!
(Psyphon): Great, now we can have an actual home instead of a van.
(Vilgax): You know what we can do to celebrate...?
Vilgax gets all up in Psyphon's personal space.
(Psyphon): Vilgax, if this about having kids again, I--
(Vilgax): Oh, come on, Psyphon! We've been married for months now, and we have enough love for a billion children! Pleeeeeease? 
(Psyphon): How would it even work? You already explained to me that your people can only have one child, and you gave your child to charity. 
(Vilgax): We'll find a surrogate!
(Psyphon): But if we choose a surrogate, I'll have to... do the thing with my sausage...
(Vilgax): And you'll get to choose the surrogate.
(Psyphon): Deal.
Meanwhile, Vilgax is meeting with property manager Dick B. Tweenerlegs. Vilgax is wearing a business suit.
(Vilgax): Alright, so when will production begin on the Chimerian Paperclip? 
(Tweenerlegs): We finally found those 4 cold-fusion engines needed, so production will begin shortly. I must ask though, isn't 34 million dollars a little expensive for a home?
(Vilgax): Trust me, Dick, soon enough I'll be needing the room. Me and Psyphon are having a child!
(Tweenerlegs): Well, congratulations!
(Vilgax): Thank you, For now, we're just having one, though. I would love two, but Psyphon only wants one.
(Tweenerlegs): Well, alright then. Are you getting a surrogate?
(Vilgax): Well, males of my species can actually get pregnant, so we don't need one.
(Tweenerlegs): Okay then.
(Vilgax): But yes, we do have a surrogate.
(Tweenerlegs): son of a bitch then why did you say that
(Vilgax): Her name's Manon, she's lovely! 
(Tweenerlegs): Well, good for--
Vilgax pukes on Tweenerlegs's shoes.
(Tweenerlegs): WHAT THE FUCK MAN 
(Vilgax): Oh, I'm so sorry! I'll get a towel!
Vilgax runs to the bathroom and gets a towel. He looks in the mirror and notices a purple spot on his chest. 
(Vilgax): The Spot of Fertility? Wait a minute, that only shows up when you're... pregnant? OH MY GOD, I'M PREGNANT! :D :D :D 
Vilgax pulls his phone out of his ass to call Psyphon, but Manon calls him instead.
(Manon): Great news, V! P finally got the job done. I'm pregnant! Isn't this great?
(Vilgax): Oh, uhh... That's great, but I should tell you, I'm actually already--
(Manon): I gotta tell you, V, I'm so honored to be carrying this child for you and P. To give such a gift to a charming couple, it's just incredible!
(Vilgax): ...Yeah. I'm really happy too.
Vilgax looks at his spot of fertility.
Meanwhile, at an open house, Ben and Looma are looking around.
(Looma): I think this is the one, Ben. I really love this place. 
(Ben): Yeah, me too. We're buying it!
Ben's phone starts ringing. 
(Ben): Oh hold on, it's my dad. I gotta take this.
Ben picks up the phone. 
(Ben's Dad): Uhh, hello Ben.
(Ben): Hi, dad. What's wrong? You sound upset.
(Ben's Dad): Well, um... There's no easy way to say this, but...Your mother, she... She's not with us anymore.
(Ben): W-what do you mean? Is she... she...
(Ben's Dad): I'm very sorry, Ben. 
Ben hangs up. 
(Looma): So, are we buying it or what?
(Ben): Actually, I think we can just live in my own house. Dad can go find his own place.
(Looma): What about your mother? What happened?
(Ben): ...we should talk.
Cut to Max and Matt, back in Vietnam. They're sharing a smoke as they walk through the forest, looking for the lone hut.
(Matt): I swear to God, if those Japs already found them, I'm torching this whole place down.
(Max): Man, you're kinda violent, you know that?
(Matt): That's what makes me a soldier, and what makes you a wuss. 
Max and Matt find the hut and enter. There's one lone soldier left, who seems just fine. 
(Matt): Patrick? Jesus!
(Max): What?
(Matt): Merry Christmas, buddy! You look pretty good for someone who's been alone for 4 days.
(Patrick): Well, actually...
A Vietnamese guy, Quite Hung, comes out.
(Matt): What the Hell!? Patrick, you're in here with a Jap!?
(Patrick): Guys, come on, let me explain, we'll--
Matt pulls out a knife and jumps onto Quite.
(Quite Hung): Hello, Magister Tennyson!
(Max): Magister? What?
(Quite Hung): Are you there, Magister Tennyson?
Snap back to reality oh there goes gravity
(Rook): You doing alright?
Max is standing in front of Rook and wakes up from his daydream.
(Max): Yeah, I'm...I'm just fine.
(Rook): Alright. Hey, Magister Tennyson, I was wondering; should Rayona and I get married?
(Max): Yeah, sure.
(Rook): Wow, you agree with me? No one else agreed! Thanks, Magister Tennyson!
Rook runs off. Max goes on his computer, looks at a picture of him with Matt (both about 40 years old), and sighs.
Cut to Vilgax looking worried in the Chimerian Minivan. Psyphon enters.
(Psyphon): Did you hear? We're having that baby!
(Vilgax): Yeah, yeah I heard. Hey, Psyphon, there's something I should tell you.
(Psyphon): Shoot.
Vilgax leans in close to Psyphon.
(Vilgax, whispering): I'm pregnant.
(Psyphon): WHAAAAAAA
Psyphon starts freaking out.
(Psyphon): But the surrogate and the Manon and the pregnancy and the...Vilgax, why didn't you say anything!?
(Vilgax): I DIDN'T KNOW STOP YELLING AT ME
(Psyphon): ...now what?
(Vilgax): I'm sure we can work this out. We can just keep both!
(Psyphon): But... two kids? Vilgax, I can barely handle one, we can't--
Psyphon is interrupted by Vilgax giving him a smooch.
(Vilgax): Ask any one of our friends, and they'll tell you that you will be a great dad. You are the only one who doesn't believe that. Please, just try. For me.
(Psyphon): You're lucky you're so cute.
Meanwhile, Ben and Looma are sitting on the couch at Ben's house. Ben's dad is there.
(Ben's Dad): Ben, I wanted to speak to you because...well...I'm moving out.
(Ben): Are you sure about this? I mean, Looma and I are fine with getting our own place.
(Ben's Dad): it's okay, son. I can just move in with my prostitute girlfriend Portianova.
(Ben): Dad!
(Ben's Dad): Oh, come on, you knew.
Ben's Dad grabs his suitcase and fedora and walks out.
(Looma): Well, we have a house now.
(Ben): This is so different. My mom's gone, my dad moved out... And yet it feels right. I think it's because I'm with you now, Looma.
(Looma): You're so adorably cheesy.
(Ben): Hey, wait a minute... I'm the man of the house now!
Ben puts on sunglasses and basks in his own glory.
(Looma): How many rooms does your house have again?
(Ben): Let's see, there's my room, my parents' old room, and a guest bedroom.
(Looma): Perfect! We can use the guest bedroom for our kids!
(Ben): What? No, I was gonna use it as a storage room for all my Sumo Slammer games.
Ben walks away. Looma sighs.
Next door, Baumann is putting up stockings.
(Baumann Jr.): When is Santa gonna come, dad?
(Baumann): Tonight, if you're a good boy.
(Baumann Jr.): YAY
(Baumann): Alright, son, I have to head out to work. Why don't you come with me? I'm setting up the Christmas Party.
(Baumann Jr.): Okay!
Baumann and Jr. get into the Baumobilee and drive off to the Baumannatorium. They go inside with boxes full of decorations and stuff. One of the many Smash Mouth "The Gift of Rock" songs plays through a montage of Baumann and Jr. decorating the Baumannatorium. I'm not even gonna script the montage because fuck it I do montages best unscripted.
(Baumann): Well, son, looks like we're all ready from Christmas.
Gaben teleports in and looks around.
(Gaben): Nice job.
Gaben teleports out.
(Baumann): Thanks for the cameo, Gabe.
Ferrick is outside of the Baumannatorium and sees Baumann and Jr. hugging.
(Ferrick): Pfft. Look at those disgusting freaks.
Cut to Max sitting in the Rustbucket. He dozes off. Cut to Matt holding Quite down with a knife.
(Matt): Die, Jap!
(Patrick): Stop! He's my friend!
Matt stops for a moment and looks at Patrick with furious anger.
(Matt): Friend? FRIEND!? We don't make friend with Japs! We FIGHT Japs!
(Patrick): He took me into this hut after I got shot, he saved my life!
(Matt): I don't care! This ends here!
Matt attempts to stab Quite, but Max stops him.
(Max): This guy isn't our enemy, Matt. 
(Matt): YES HE IS!
Matt throws Max off him and charges towards Quite, but Patrick takes his knife from him and throws him to the ground.
(Patrick): That is enough, Matt!
(Max): What the Hell got into you!?
(Quite Hung): Please, stop!
Everyone stops what they're doing and look at Quite.
(Patrick): Quite, you speak English?
(Quite Hung): This... wrong. Is Christmas. Christmas is... friends. Family. Please.
(Matt): What the Hell is this goof talking about?
(Max): I think you know exactly what he's talking about. He's right, Matt; it's Christmas. This is not how we should be acting. We are all human beings.
(Matt): That is such sappy bullsh--
An explosion is heard outside. 
(Patrick): What the--!?
(Max): Wait here, I'll go check!
Max walks out of the hut, but as soon as he does, he wakes up.
(Max): This has to stop.
Max goes over to the driver seat and starts the Rustbucket, but it won't start in this weather.
(Max): You've gotta be kidding me!
Meanwhile, Vilgax is at the Bellwood Baking Club baking some blueberry muffins. Maryl walks by him.
(Maryl): Hey, Vilgax, why do YOU like to bake? I'm curious.
(Vilgax): I bake when I'm upset.
(Maryl): Aw, I'm sorry something's upset you, dear. You know I'm here when you need me.
(Vilgax): Thanks, Maryl, you're a great supervisor. :)
Vilgax continues to bake as Maryl walks away. Psyphon walks into the Baking Club like what up I got a big Skype app. He walks over to Vilgax.
(Psyphon): Vilgax, you only bake when you're upset. What's going on?
(Vilgax): They cut our funding! My parents aren't giving me my allowance because they were in a car accident, those selfish jerks! We can't afford the Chimerian Stapler now!
(Psyphon): What now!? We can't raise two kids in a minivan!
(Vilgax): But we don't have a choice!
Vilgax and Psyphon get sad together.
Cut to Ben and Looma in the kitchen planning their wedding.
(Ben): I think we should have a backyard wedding.
(Looma): Why?
(Ben): I don't feel like spending a bunch of money.
(Looma): I dunno Ben. I'd always imagined something bigger.
(Ben): Well, Looma, we still need money to get presents for everyone.
(Looma): True.
(Ben): And now that we own the house, we have to start paying mortgage and stuff.
(Looma): True...
(Ben): And we need to buy furniture for your room and--
(Looma): I GET IT.
Looma walks out of the kitchen. Ben calls Baumann on his Pikltrix.
(Ben): Do you have it set up yet, Baumann?
(Baumann, on phone): No, but it'll be done soonish.
(Ben): Are you SURE I don't have to pay you for this, Baumann?
(Baumann, on phone): Well, it's not like you've ever payed off any of the damage you've brought to my store.
(Ben): Cool, thanks Iggy. What would I do without you?
(Baumann, on phone): You'd probably be dead.
Baumann hangs up. Cut to the Baumannatorium. Baumann walks over to the wedding-in-progress. The priest, FACM, is there.
(FACM): You know, isn't it a bit odd to plan a wedding on the same day as the wedding itself?
(Baumann): This is Ben we're talking about.
(FACM): True. He is a stupid little brat, after all.
Ferrick walks in.
(Baumann): Oh, hey Ferrick. How's your Christmas Eve so far?
(Ferrick): Bah humbug.
(Baumann): You don't like Christmas?
(Ferrick): I hate Christmas, the whole Christmas season.
(Baumann Jr.) Hey, Mr. Ferrick, why do you hate Christmas?
Ferrick pushes Baumann Jr.
(Baumann): What the hell man
(Ferrick): Later losers
Ferrick jumps out of the window.
(FACM): What a jew.
Meanwhile, Max is still daydreaming. When he walks out the hut, he sees a bunch of soldiers fighting, both Vietnamese and American. 
(Max): STOP!
The soldiers stop fighting and look at Max.
(Max): Guys, it's Christmas! Can't we stop this fighting for just one day? Can't we learn from Quite and Patrick?
Quite and Patrick walk out like pals.
(Matt): ...I agree. This has to end.
The soldiers pause and look at each other.
(Nightly): Maybe he's right. Just one day can't hurt.
(Max): Would you gentlemen care to join us for turkey?
And then they all eat turkey together.
(Max): You know, you were pretty violent back there. 
(Matt): I know, I'm sorry. Friends?
(Max): Friends.
Max drives over to Bellwood Cemetery. He parks the Rustbucket and walks inside, passing by various tombstones. He walks over to a lone tombstone near a tree. It's Matt Ninesister's. Max stares at it for a few seconds.
(Max): Even though you crippled me, you nearly killed my grandson, and you tried to take over the world, you used to be like a brother to me.
Max places some flowers on his grave.
(Max): Goodbye, Matt.
Max walks away from the grave. As he walks away, an old Vietnamese man walks past him, also towards Ninesister's grave. All we see of him is a silhouette as the sun begins to go down.
Cut to Rook and Rayona in the Proto-Yota.
(Rook): Rayona, can I ask you something?
(Rayona): What is it, dear?
(Rook): Will you marry me? I mean, we've been together for some time now, we have a few kids who've been mentioned several times but never actually appear...I think it's time we tie the knot.
(Rayona): I'm sorry, I'm not ready yet.
(Rook): What do you MEAN you're not ready yet?
Rook gets a call from Bromeba.
(Rook): Hello?
(Bromeba, on phone): Rook! Guess what? Ben and Looma are getting married! Their wedding's tonight! Be there or be square!
Rook hangs up. 
(Rayona): Rook? Why don't we pull over?
Rook stops the truck.
(Rook): It's not FAIR! It's not fair! All my life I've been afraid of becoming like him, all my life! All my life with you, and it's not fair! He can't just say he's sorry and make it all go away! It's not that easy! It's not fair! It's NOT FUCKING FAIR!
Rook sobs to himself.
(Rayona): Rook...
(Rook): WHAT DO YOU WANT
(Rayona): I think I'm ready.
(Rook): Oh boy! I'll get out the wedding planner and we'll get started right away! This is so exciting! :D
Rayona sighs.
(Rayona): god damn man children
Cut to Manon's house. Vilgax and Psyphon ring the doorbell. Manon answers.
(Manon): Hey, guys! Come in.
Vilgax and Psyphon come in and sit on the couch.
(Manon): So what's up?
Manon has a noticeable bulge in the stomach region.
(Vilgax): Wow! You're already so far along! Just like me!
Vilgax opens his jacket (it's winter he's wearing one) and his stomach pops out.
(Manon): Yeah, that was weird, like, I just got pregnant a few hours ago.
(Psyphon): Babies of my species develop really fast.
(Vilgax): OMG ME TOO! WE HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON! We should get married!
(Psyphon): We are married.
(Vilgax): Oh yeah.
(Manon): Wait, you're pregnant too? I thought you hired me to be your surrogate.
(Psyphon): Yeah...about that...
(Vilgax): Looks like I was able to have kids afterall. Oopsie.
(Manon): So...now what?
(Psyphon): pull the god damn thing out 
(Vilgax): We'll have twins! I'll have a baby, you'll have a baby! We can be preggo friends!
Vilgax sits next to Manon and begins gossiping.
(Psyphon): Twins...yeah...
(Vilgax): So what kind of baby names do you--AAAAAGH PSYPHON
(Psyphon): What's wrong?
(Vilgax): IT's TIIIIIIME
Vilgax begins hyperventilating. Manon and Psyphon grab Vilgax.
(Manon): Quick! We have to get him to the hospital!
Manon and Psyphon carry Vilgax into the Chimerian Minivan. Manon falls to her knees inside.
(Manon): My water broke too!
(Psyphon): Good grief!
Psyphon jumps into the driver's seat and drives off. He calls Ben.
(Psyphon): Hey, uh, Ben...
(Ben, on phone): Psyphon? What is it?
(Psyphon): Meet me at the hospital, Vilgax is going into labor!
(Ben, on phone): Wait, labor? What? Isn't Vilgax a guy? What's going on?
(Psyphon): I'll explain when we get there! Call the others!
(Ben, on phone): Okay.
Cut to the hospital. Ben, Looma, Baumann, Jr., Max, Ferrick, Gaben, Pan-Pizza, and Psyphon are sitting outside of Vilgax's room. They hear muffled screams and breathing. It stops. Dr. Mufflinbum comes out.
(Mufflinbum): N'alright, you may come in.
Everyone walks in. Vilgax and Manon are sitting in two separate beds.
(Vilgax): Hey guys!
(Ben): So, uh, Vilgax, you...got pregnant, that's...really weird.
(Vilgax): Don't you remember when I got pregnant that one time on Valentine's Day?
(Ben): I repress my memories of those days.
Dr. Mufflinbum, Jim, and Meow all walk in carrying four ugly-ass squid-shark-babies I mean bundles of joy.
(Mufflinbum): Here are your kids. Don't drop them, that'd be bad.
(Psyphon): FOUR!? I thought there were only two!
(Mufflinbum): They each had twins, idiot. Maybe next time you should have a sonogram or a doctor's appointment or prepare for you babies in any way shape or form just god damn do something.
(Vilgax): No wonder I was so fat.
Vilgax holds his two babies and Manon holds her two babies.
(Vilgax): THIS ONE HAS MY EYES! So does this one! And those two have your eyes, Psyphon!
Psyphon holds his kids nervously. He takes a good look at them and smiles.
(Psyphon): What should we name them?
(Vilgax): Let's name this one Odie, this one Camille...
(Psyphon): ...this one Brian Blessed and this last one...
(Vilgax): Ben.
(Ben): What?
(Vilgax): Let's name the last kid after Ben!
(Psyphon): i wanted to name her after my mom but fine okay whatever
(Ben): Wow, Vilgax, I'm...I'm flattered. Thank you so much.
(Mufflinbum): It's a girl, though.
(Ben): god dammit
(Looma): Uh, Ben...
(Ben): Hmm?
(Looma): The wedding is in 20 minutes...
(Baumann): UH OH GOTTA JET
Baumann grabs Jr. and blasts off.
(Looma): What's he worried about?
(Ben): Uh, I have no clue, yeah.
Cut to the exterior of the Baumannatorium. Everyone walks out of the Chimerian Minivan wearing fancy suits. Looma is blindfolded. 
(Looma): Why am I blindfolded for my own wedding?
(Ben): Just hang in there for a second.
Everyone walks into the store. Ben unblindfolds Looma.
(Ben): Surprise!
The Baumannatorium is totally decked out with a big stage and podium, rows of seats, food tables everywhere, and a painting of Ben and Looma.
(Looma): *gasp* Ben! It's--it's--
Looma hugs Ben.
(Looma): It's wonderful!
(FACM): Everybody take your seats so we may begin!
Everyone sits down. Ben walks to the podium. Looma walks down the isle.
(FACM): We are gathered here today to witness the wedding of Benjamin Tennyson and Looma Red Wind. If anybody feels these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold their peace.
(Driba): No, wait, I love him! Hihihihi, wouldn't that be something?
(Blukic): SHUT THE HELL UP THIS IS NO TIME FOR JOKES
(FACM): Okay then. Ben Tennyson, do you take Looma Red Wind to be your lawfully wedded wife? In sickness, and in health?
(Ben): I do.
(FACM): And do you, Looma Red Wind, take Ben Tennyson to be your lawfully wedded husband? In sickness, and in health?
(Looma, tearing up ): I do.
(FACM): Then I now pronounce you, husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.
Ben and Looma smooch the smooch and hug the hug. The crowd cheers. Max is clapping like a hyper 5-year-old, Vilgax and Psyphon and holding their kids and cheering, Rook and Rayona and smooching the smooch, Baumann is holding up Jr., but Ferrick is pouting and looking angry.
(Baumann): Lighten up, Ferrick! This is Ben and Looma's big day!
(Ferrick): That's exactly why I'm mad.
Ferrick walks outside and sits in the snow like a bratty kid.
(Baumann): His loss.
Later, everyone is heading home.
(Baumann): Everybody come over tomorrow! We're having dinner!
Cut to Ben and Looma going to bed.
(Looma): I thought you couldn't afford a big wedding like this!
(Ben): I have my ways.
The next morning, it's CHRISTMAS! Everybody is parked outside of the Baumannatorium. Everyone is gathered around holding their presents. Ben transforms into Ghostfreak and grabs the present out of its box.
(Baumann): Why didn't you just open it?
(Ghostfreak): It's really nice wrapping.
(Baumann): Fair enough.
Baumann opens his present from Ben, and it's a coupon for "5 Free Baumannatorium Repairs". Ben looks at him with an idiotic smile.
(Baumann): It's a start.
Vilgax and Psyphon are playing with their kids. Ben walks up to them.
(Ben): Hey, Vilgax, come outside. I have a surprise for you.
(Vilgax): OH BOY!
Ben, Vilgax, and Psyphon walk to the back of the Baumannatorium. There's a large something hidden under a tarp. Ben transforms into Shocksquatch and pulls it off. It's the Chimerian Stapler 2.0!
(Vilgax and Psyphon): WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
(Shocksquatch): You like it, eh? I wehnt Upgrehde and built her right up for ye. It has some rooms fer those kidsa yers.
(Vilgax): OH MY GOSH!
Vilgax and Psyphon run inside.
(Psyphon): It has more bathrooms! And a working dishwasher!
(Vilgax): We have over 1000 channels now, Psyphon! THERE'S SO MANY HOW WILL WE WATCH THEM ALL!?!?!?
Vilgax runs out.
(Vilgax): Thanks, Ben!
Ben detransforms.
(Ben): Don't mention it.
That night, everyone is by the fireplace, except Ferrick, who is sitting outside. Baumann goes over to him.
(Bauman): You sure you don't want to come in?
(Ferrick): I hate Christmas.
(Baumann): Can't you just put your bitterness aside for once and just have some fun?
(Ferrick): ...damn you and your charms.
Ferrick joins the party. Pan out as we hear everyone laughing and having a gay old time.
THE END
Category:Scripts