Bank Robbery

Bank Robbery is the eighth episode in the first season of The Super Wario Bros. Wah-wah Show!
==SUMMARY==
After spending all their money without realizing it, Wario and Waluigi gotta make some easy cash or else they're fucked.
==CHARACTERS==
*Wario
*Waluigi
*Some tiny moron that nobody cares about
*Dry Bones
*Toad
==SCRIPT==
Wario is sitting on the couch, watching TV and eating a bowl of popcorn, with butter practically drowning the damn stuff. Waluigi comes in, red with anger. He holds up a print-out of cash transactions from Wario's PayPal.
Waluigi: HEY! THE FUCK IS THIS?!
Wario: Does every episode have to start with your lanky ass waltzing into the room?
Waluigi: No. In fact, the last one didn't have us at all--
Wario: WHAT'D I SAY ABOUT BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL?!
Waluigi: S-Sorry! Wait... Wait, no! I'm not sorry! Look at this paper!
Wario stares at the paper for 15 seconds longer than he needs to.
Wario: We have lots of money...?
Waluigi: We HAD lots of money and you fucking SPENT it, you goddamned idiot!
Wario: Cool it, District 75 dropout. I used some funds on a new TV. All we gotta do is get more.
Waluigi: Get MORE? We're not rolling in the green, boss, we're using a fair amount of it on this war, and we're running out of funds quickly! We can't go back on welfare!
Wario: We're not GOING to.
Waluigi: ...huh?
Wario: We're gonna rob the bank.
Waluigi gasps in excitement.
Waluigi: You mean...?!
Wario: That's right. Just like the good ol' days. Classic Wario Bros. heist.
Waluigi: Holy shit, we're really doing it! Lemme get our masks...
Wario and Waluigi put on their old ski masks they used for robberies.
Waluigi: This smells like shit.
Wario: Oh, that's where that jizz rag went!
Waluigi: ...you are fucking vile.
Cut to the exterior of the bank. Wario and Waluigi stand outside, each wielding a gun.
Wario: Let's get some war funds.
Waluigi kicks the door to open it. He clutches his foot and wails in pain.
Waluigi: AAAAAGGHH! WHAT THE FUCK?!
Wario: Are you fucking slow? It's a pull door.
Wario pulls the door open and drags Waluigi inside with him.
Wario: EVERYBODY BE COOL, THIS IS A ROBBERY!
Waluigi jumps to his feet.
Waluigi: ANY OF YOU FUCKING PRICKS MOVE, AND I'LL EXECUTE EVERY MOTHERFUCKING LAST ONE OF YOU!
The bank is completely empty. Only a mustached Toad wearing a top hat sits behind the desk as the teller.
Waluigi: Well, the Pulp Fiction route didn't work.
Wario and Waluigi walk up to the Toad, both guns pointed at him.
Wario: DARME EL DINERO, AMIGO!
Teller: Sorry guys, I can't give you that money. We just got robbed 5 minutes before you guys showed up.
Waluigi: ...
Wario: ...qué...?!
Teller: Yeah, some weird skeleton guy and his troops. Called themselves... the... Cooper Dynasty or something--
Waluigi: The Koopa Dynastia!
Wario: Those FUCKERS!
Teller: You know them?
Wario: We're locked in a war right now, actually.
Waluigi: Looks like we gotta make another move on them. With some cold, hard lead.
Wario: Let's get the fuck outta here. Hope you get your money back, bank teller guy!
Teller: Thanks!
Wario: So we can rob you next week!
Teller: Thanks...
Wario and Waluigi exit. As soon as they do, the Toad takes off the mustache and top hat, revealing...
Some tiny moron that nobody cares about: WE GOT 'EM!
Dry Bones comes out from underneath the desk, joyful.
Dry Bones: YES! OUR PLAN WORKED! That stupid Drop Dead Wario Team won't know what hit 'em...
==TRIVIA==
*While the plot of Bank Robbery strays away ever so slightly from the story of the original Robbing the Bank episode (with a few references and callbacks), the remade version adds more to the main lore of the show.
*This is the first episode written by WarioWahWahShow.
*The movie Wario was watching on the TV was the recent remake of The Hitcher, one of the worst movies known to man, woman, and child.
Category:Scripts
Category:Show episodes
Category:TSWBWWS Episodes