Hint Man

The Hint Man is a character in EarthBound. He states that his service is to provide hints specifically to Ness if he is currently unaware of what to do during the game. He can be found in each town, and his hints increase in price the further the town is from Onett. His location is shown on the player's map, if they have one. He may be found inside a booth in a house, or standing outside holding a sign.
As most hint-givers are in games, the Hint Man's text changes depending on where the player is in the game. Although most of his text is centered around giving Ness and friends hints, sometimes the Hint Man will say something not helpful, often a joke or something serious directed towards Ness. 
== Appearances ==
=== Onett ($35 per Hint) [1-6] ===
1. Entering Onett for the first time.
“It seems that the citizens of Onett have been harassed by those dang street punks called the Sharks. I wonder if going and talking to Frank, the leader of the Sharks, would do any good?”
2. Upon defeating the Sharks.
“So, have you met B.H. Pirkle, the mayor of Onett? Mayor Pirkle’s office is on the second floor of City Hall.”
3. Obtaining the Key to the Shack.
“Go Northwest. A traveling entertainer is having some trouble getting into a locked shack…”
4. Unlocking the door to the Shack.
“You’re on your way to Giant Step, aren’t you? Just be careful, the police are pretty touchy about people, not to mention kids, going up there…”
5. Getting your First Melody.
“The police were here looking for you. Did you do something illegal? Head South on the street in front of my shop. You‘ll find the Onett Police Station. I think it‘s best if you turn yourself in… no matter what you may have done.”
6. Defeating Captain Strong before going to Twoson.
“Have you heard of a girl named (Paula)? She lives in Twoson, the town next to Onett… They say she has some pretty spectacular supernatural powers. You can get to Twoson by heading south.”
=== Twoson ($50 per Hint) [7-18] ===
7. Entering Twoson for the first time.
“Have you been to Apple Kid and Orange Kid’s houses? Their places are south of the Polestar Preschool. They are great inventors …to be. They need some financial help. If you help them …later, for sure, without fail, certainly, something wonderful will happen. Believe me, this hint is worth a lot more than you paid.”
8. Funding Apple Kid.
“If you go east from the bus stop, you will enter the Peaceful Rest Valley. If you keep going east, you will come to Happy Happy Village. You should maybe go there, unless you have something better to do?”
9. Getting a call from Apple Kid about the Pencil Eraser.
“You got a call from Apple Kid on your receiver phone? What are you doing here, so far away from his home? I can’t give you any hints, but I’ll keep your $50.”
10. Obtaining the Pencil Eraser.
“Have you spoken to Everdred in Burglin Park?” Yes: “What you DID talk to him? So, why are you here? Go back to the Peaceful Rest Valley.” No: “Well, well, well… that’s not good. You really should take the time out to meet Everdred.”
11. Entering Happy Happy Village.
“Have you been to the Happy Happism headquarters at the center of Happy Happy village? Do you want to go there? Or not? What? Why can’t you make up your mind!”
12. Getting zapped by Carpainter without the Franklin Badge.
“Do you remember seeing a little mountain cabin on the way through the Peaceful Rest Valley? There must be a cave in the Happy Happy Village that leads to that cabin.”
13. Obtaining the Franklin Badge.
“This is my business, so I’m happy to have customers. But don’t you know this is a crisis? You shouldn’t be wasting time here. Anyway, I’ll keep your $50.”
14. Beating Carpainter before rescuing Paula.
“You know that Paula is in the mountain cabin, right? By rescuing her you actually rescue yourself.”
15. Rescuing Paula before bringing her back to her family.
“Paula’s father at the Polestar Preschool must be really worried. You should be considerate of a father’s feelings toward his daughter. He’s only human, y’know!”
16. Having Paula meet her family before talking to Everdred again.
“Go and see Everdred, the boss of Burglin Park. Just trust me…you go see him.”
17. Getting the Wad of Bills from Everdred.
“The Runaway Five, the band at the Chaos Theater, is up to their eyes in debt. Could anyone pay off their debt for them?”
18. Paying the Runaway Five’s debt.
“I don’t think there is anything else you need to do in this town. It’s okay of you stay, but it’s really okay if you leave…” (In-game typo)
=== Threed ($60 per Hint) [19-28] ===
191. Entering Threed for the first time.
“There’s a tunnel northwest of this town. There are two guard zombies that hang out at the entrance. They are actually pretty nice guys… It might be a good idea to meet those guys…But it’s quite all right if you don’t…Though I think that you really ought to go there.
20. Checking the 2 zombies at the tunnel entrance.
“So, how are you doin’ kid? If you’re tired, you should go to the hotel and rest.”
21. Jeff’s arrival into Threed.
“Do you know about that mysterious tent that appeared at the south end of town? I don’t know, but…it looks kinda… strange…”
192. Beating Boogey Tent before Apple Kid’s call.
“There’s a tunnel northwest of this town. There are two guard zombies that hang out at the entrance. They are actually pretty nice guys… It might be a good idea to meet those guys…But it’s quite all right if you don’t…Though I think that you really ought to go there.”
22. Obtaining Zombie Paper.
“Zombie Paper only works well in a tent. “After you set the paper in a tent, go to the hotel and put your dogs up.” What, didn’t you read the Zombie paper instructions?”
23. Luring the zombies in the tent with the Zombie Paper.
“There’s an underground path northwest of this town. Those guard zombies should be gone now.”
24. Defeating Mini Barf before entering Saturn Valley.
“(♩)Saturn Valley is very nice! You should go at least once or twice(♩)”
25. Entering Saturn Valley for the first time.
“It seems like you don’t know what to do in Saturn Valley. The Mr. Saturn on the second floor of the cave should be able to tell you a password to get you into the secret base. Now that sounds like some handy info!”
26. Getting the password but not entering Belch’s Factory.
“Mr. Saturn must have told you to wait for three minutes in front of the waterfall. What? You don’t know where the waterfall is? The waterfall is actually named Grapefruit Falls. After you exit the tunnel that begins in the Threed graveyard, go to the north. You certainly know about the cave to Saturn Valley that is then on your right. But… you should not go in that cave. Keep going straight north. You’ll eventually come to the Grapefruit Falls. Then, wait patiently for three minutes.”
27. Entering Belch’s Factory.
“How about this for some extra special help—I’ll teach you some great tactics for dealing with Belch. Belch really loves Fly Honey, from what I’ve heard. Therefore, you should use the Fly Honey during battle.”
281. Defeating Master Belch before getting the Third Melody.
“In the middle of Dusty Dunes Desert, there is someone who’s starving. …I just sense it.”
=== Fourside ($75 per Hint) [29-43] ===
282. Entering Fourside for the first time.
“In the middle of Dusty Dunes Desert, there is someone who’s starving. …I just sense it.”
29. Feeding the miner.
“At the Topolla Theater, the Runaway Five have booked a series of gigs. This is just a rumor, but I hear that they’ve been snowed again and are in some kind of trouble. So… If I were you, I’d go and talk with them.”
30. In the Topolla Theater, having either talked with the Runaway Five or owner.
“The Runaway Five, who are now appearing at the Topolla Theater, got stuck again because of financial problems. To help them, a tremendous amount of money will be needed. Hey, talking about a tremendous amount of money, do you know about someone in the Dusty Dunes Desert? You should head to the desert to look for buried treasure. It would be fabulous if you found it!”
31. Obtaining the diamond.
“It’s such a pity… The Runaway Five have managed to get stuck at the Topolla Theater because of their debt problems. Why don’t you go and talk to Miss Fake, the manager of the theater? That diamond you’re carrying should come in handy.”
32. Paying off the Runaway Five’s debt again.
“The department store in Fourside has reopened after being renovated. People say that they have a good variety of things, but the prices are a little bit high. Have you been there yet?”
33. Paula’s second abduction at the Department Store.
“Well… I’m not exactly sure, but it seems to me that… the top floor of the department store is kind of suspicious…”
34. Defeating Department Store Spook.
“Have you been to Jackie’s Café? It’s not difficult to find… the sign says “café.””
35. Seeing Everdred knocked out outside the cafe.
“These days, young people seem to be so indifferent to what’s happening in the real world? It’s disappointing that you seem to be indifferent about the real world, too. For example, if you see someone lying in the street, don’t you think that you should really stop and try to help him?”
36. Talking to Everdred again.
“Do you want to hear the hint once more? This is a special service just for you… Did you go back to Jackie’s Café? There seems to be something mighty suspicious behind the counter… that’s it for today.”
37. Defeating the Mani Mani Statue but ignoring the monkey.
“The monkey…got charred. Is he all right?”
38. Having talked with the monkey.
“You should be able to find something out at the monkey cave in the Dusty Dunes Desert. That’s what I say… On to the desert!”
39. Obtaining the Yogurt Machine.
“The maid out front of the Monotoli Building is waiting for the Yogurt dispenser.”
40. Giving her the Yogurt Machine.
“I heard that you were asked to dinner by the cute maid at the Monotoli Building. Lucky you! I envy kids like you… but just a bit.”
41. Going back to Threed with the Runaway Five.
“It was a while ago, but I heard that a silver flying contraption of some sort crash landed in the graveyard in Threed.”
42. Going back to Winters in the Sky Runner.
“In Winters, you’ve been to the cave north of Stonehenge, right? I would bet it’s one of “Your Sanctuary.””
43. Getting the Fourth Sanctuary before leaving to Summers.
“Do you remember that Dr. Andonuts had the Sky Runner? What do you say to your going and giving it a whirl?”
=== Summers ($150 per Hint) [44-51] ===
44. Entering Summers for the first time.
“You need to make a reservation by phone to go to the Stoic Club. Someone in Toto, the port town next to Summers, should know the phone number.”
45. Getting the number but not calling it.
“Try placing a call to the Strip… ooops! Sorry, I mean the Stoic Club.”
46. Making a reservation.
“After you get into the Stoic Club, be sure to talk to the man with the mustache at the back table. This is a pretty important hint.”
47. Talking to the magic cake lady but not going outside to try it.
“People say that there is a Magic cake vendor on the pavement by the beach in the resort of Summers. Oh, yeah, “pavement” means “sidewalk.” Well, I was just testing you… Are you angry? I didn’t mean it… sorry!”
48. Poo’s arrival into Summers.
“Scaraba Cultural Museum… Scaraba Cultural Museum… Scaraba Cultural Museum…”
49. Obtaining the Hieroglyph Photo.
“At the Dinosaur Museum in Fourside…A man called Mr. Spoon has a heavy mustache.”
501. Defeating Plague Rat of Doom.
“If you want to sail across the ocean, who better than to ask but a sailor?”
51. Being rejected by the sailor by a lack of money without having the Fifth Sanctuary.
“Heck, since the door to the sewer is open, why not go all the way inside and look around? I know the stink and the vermin could overpower you, but it might make you tougher, too.”
502. Using the Carrot Key to unlock Pink Cloud pre-Scaraba.
“If you want to sail across the ocean, who better than to ask but a sailor?”
=== Scaraba ($100 per Hint) [52-56] ===
52. Entering Scaraba for the first time pre-Pink Cloud.
“If you have the Carrot Key, you should go to Dalaam and give it to the bunny at Pink Cloud. If you don’t have the Carrot Key, you should go to Magnet Hill. You should be able to find the carrot key there.”
53. Having entered Scaraba post-Pink Cloud.
“After you’ve made all the necessary preparations, go to the pyramid. In front of the pyramid, as the writing on the hieroglyph told, step on the round plates in front of the sphinx, and draw a star. That was really too much info to give out as a hint, wasn’t it?”
54. Opening the pyramid door.
“Deep in the pyramid, there is an item called the Hawk eye, or so I’ve heard. You shouldn’t exit the pyramid unless you have the Hawk eye.”
55. Poo leaves to learn Starstorm.
“I don’t know if he’s an enemy of yours or not, but the guy called “Dungeon Man” seems to be waiting for you. Have you already met him before this?”
56. Dungeon Man getting stuck on the trees.
“There is a broken submarine in the Dungeon Man’s tummy. Once the submarine gets fixed you can go to the Deep Darkness. Uhhh… maybe…”
=== Post-Scaraba [57-69]===
57. Entering Deep Darkness for the first time.
“If you need to brighten up a dark street you use…Yep, that’s right! A flashlight! Oh… you don’t have one? Actually, I knew that you didn’t. Well, what comes in handy is something that you, y’know, picked up in, y’know, the pyramid… I forgot the name… It’s that whatchyamacallit… oh… crud!”
58. Having used the Hawk Eye.
“It’s tough, but you have to keep pressing on through the Deep Darkness. That way, you’ll find the village of the Tenda. Don’t give up yet.”
59. Apple Kid’s abduction in Winters.
“Apple…Winters…Andonuts…”
60. Obtaining the Eraser Eraser Machine.
“The Pencil Eraser makes pencil-shaped stuff disappear. What do you think the Eraser Eraser machine does?”
61. Having defeated Starman Deluxe.
“Well, usually you find books at the library. One who goes to the fishmonger and expects to find books is likely to get very embarrassed indeed.”
62. Having obtained “Overcoming Shyness”
“To correct shyness, you should let that person read a self-help book. “Overcoming Shyness” is probably the best… It was a best-seller, y’know. If a whole group is shy, the leader of the group should read the book on shyness to all the group members, and the whole group may get over shyness though at least a part will certainly stop being shy. So, how many times did I use the word “shy”?...” (Seven times.)
63. Giving the book to the Tendas without talking to them.
“Oh, heeey! Have you spoken with like, the Tenda deep in the cute, little Tenda village? Oh… my… gosh… Really??? Are you like, really serious??? I sound like a y’know, teenage girl? Do you like the way I talk now?”
64. Gaining access to Lumine Hall.
“There is a very important place under the Tenda Village.”
651. Entering Lost Underworld for the first time.
“Do you know about the talking rock in the Lost Underworld? You should listen to what the rock has to say and then put it into practice.”
652. Missing any of the eight melodies.
“Do you know about the talking rock in the Lost Underworld? You should listen to what the rock has to say and then put it into practice.”
66. Returning Post-Magicant.
“Maybe… where you should visit is Saturn Valley…”
67. When Dr. Andonuts asks you to obtain the Zexonyte from Onett.
“A very special substance is necessary to complete the Phase Distorter. You know, I wonder if the site in Onett where the meteorite landed has something to do with this? I say, go there and check out the site.”
=== ($0 per Hint) ===
68. After getting the Zexonyte.
“I have no more hints for you. You’ve done such a good job to this point. From here on out… Trust your judgment, and also your luck.”
69. Defeat Giygas.
“Well, I want to thank you for all the times that you used the hint shop. It’s been a while since I first saw you… This is my final day in business. ………. Well, so long kid, No, no… Master Ness. See you again, if fate allows it.”
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