Bubble Bass Saves The Day

Bubble Bass Saves The Day is 's second entry of Spin Off Kings Season Two. It is also the second archive of File 1 of I Simp For Juicy Titties. It was released on May 16, 2020.
==Transcript==
[episode starts with Bubble Bass sitting at a desk in his basement with a pen in his hand. He appears to be writing Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy fan fiction.]
Bubble Bass: ...oh yes. [shuffles papers] And so, the dirty bubble popped like a cherry and Man Ray turned into Rayman. [sets paper down] Oh boy, this is ever so arousing! I could just… just… [slips his fin in his pants as he starts rubbing at the sight of his fan fiction. His mom yells and comes down the stairs.]
Bubble Bass’ Mom: Bubble Bass, dinner is read- WHAT THE HELL! [shrieks while walking in on her son]
Bubble Bass: It’s not what you think, mom! [takes fin out while getting up to reassure her]
Bubble Bass’ Mom: Why, son, why? Why?
Bubble Bass: I was just checking my pockets! I tried to find the penny I found earlier!
Bubble Bass’ Mom: Enough is enough! No one does that disgusting deed in my house. [cuts to the door where she kicks Bubble Bass out. Bubble Bass seems hurt]
Bubble Bass: Mom, I can explain!
Bubble Bass’ Mom: Until you learn how to clean up that FILTHY act of yours, [throws notebook] take you and your smutty Barnacle Man and Mermaid Boy fan fictions out of here! [slams door behind, but it cuts to her inside with a page of the story. She takes a quick glance] Oooh… interesting. I might have to get the vibrator out for this one! [hurries upstairs, shows Bubble Bass laying on the pavement]
Bubble Bass: Eh, I don’t need mom. [stands up, shaving dust off] Yeah! That uncultured rapscallion, not even knowing the names of those legends. Pfft. [walks off into the distance]
[extended cut of him walking around Bikini Bottom in a depressed mood. It cuts to show him sleeping in a dark alley where a hermit crab comes and bites him. He then wakes up, shakes the dust off of his head, and makes his way over to the street]
Bubble Bass: Welp, that wasn’t my best night. If only Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy could show me the light.
[walks onto the road where he spots a convention center with a sign saying “Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy In The Flesh… Signing Autographs.” This catches his attention.]
Bubble Bass: Holy tits! Could that be? [walks into the place to see a long line leading up to the two heroes at a table] It is! Hold up, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy! [shows SpongeBob in line]
SpongeBob: Bubble Bass! Shh. They’re about to make an announcement.
Bubble Bass: Oh, right.
[Mermaid Man rises up to a podium]
Mermaid Man: Greetings, all you damn kids. I ugh… ugh… LOVE all of you. [starts stumbling]
Patrick: [appears next to SpongeBob] Aw, he loves us!
Mermaid Man: Yeah… [starts snoozing as it cuts to the crowd in shock. Barnacle Boy comes from behind and pushes him out of the way, going up to the podium instead]
Barnacle Boy: Get out of here, you old coot. [adjusts mic] So, what Mermaid Man was trying to say is… well, there’s no easy way to put this. But, we’ve decided that after 60 years, we can’t keep up with crime.
[crowd watches attentively]
Barnacle Boy: So, as a result, the both of us are retiring.
Crowd: Ok boomer.
Barnacle Boy: What? No! I’m serious! [walks away] Alright, let’s continue this shit.
Bubble Bass: WAIT! [trucks his way through the line, causing kids to get shoved out of the way onto the sides of the place] Excuse me, coming through, out of the way, fuck off!
Barnacle Boy: Come on, kid. Wait your turn.
Bubble Bass: Barnacle Boy, you don’t understand! You need to keep fighting crime.
Barnacle Boy: Someone else will have to do it.
Mermaid Man: [wakes up] HUH?! WHAT CRIME?!
Bubble Bass: I mean, it can’t be too hard, right?
Barnacle Boy: Pfff, yeah right. How about you try doing what we’ve done all these years? Then you can see how hard it is for yourself.
Bubble Bass: Oh! You mean?!
Barnacle Boy: ...huh?
Bubble Bass: Oh, thank you, Barnacle Boy. It’s an honor for you to pass the torch to me!
Barnacle Boy: Yeah, yeah, sure, whatever makes you sleep at night.
Bubble Bass: Crime shall be no more! [runs off, but then comes back] Wait! First, can you sign my fan fiction I made about you?
[signs reluctantly, as Bubble Bass runs off]
Mermaid Man: Barnacle Boy, you didn’t even read his fan fiction!
Barnacle Boy: Oh, I’ve seen it on the Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy Wiki before. This guy has a… COLORFUL writing style.
[cuts to Bubble Bass in the alley he slept in. He takes out a suitcase and opens it, as a bunch of clothes pop out. A quick montage of him putting on superhero clothing and accessories ensues, and it all ends with a cut of Bubble Bass in an outfit similar to Mermaid Man’s.]
Bubble Bass: Mermaid Bass, away! [starts jogging away, but he bursts out of clothing.] Hm, yes. Yes, I see. Interesting. First stop, the tailor!
[cuts to him walking out of the tailor]
Bubble Bass: Ah, 5XL fits like a glove. Now it’s time to save Bikini Bottom! [ominous cry in the distance] What’s that?
[shows Mrs. Puff next to a tree where her pet snail is on a high branch]
Mrs. Puff: Help! HELP!!!
Bubble Bass: Fear not, citizen, Mermaid Bass is here!
Mrs. Puff: No time for cosplay. I need a real hero!
Bubble Bass: Well, actually, I took over for Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, so uh… what do you need?
Mrs. Puff: My snail is stuck in that tree! [points up to the purple-shelled snail who lets out a meow]
Bubble Bass: Ah, a classic case of help! [starts climbing tree as it starts to bend over]
Mrs. Puff: What the hell are you doing!
Bubble Bass: Saving your sna- [falls down, but the branch also snaps, causing the snail to fly down. Bubble Bass lays on the ground in pain]
Mrs. Puff: No, my poor snail! [snail lands on Bubble Bass, causing her to bounce up onto another tree. Bubble Bass gets up and spots her]
Bubble Bass: Yeah, so uh… you might wanna get a fireman. I gotta go. [walks off in shame, cuts to a new scene where Bubble Bass is walking down the road] Hm, everything seems to be in order.
[at that moment, Sandy runs out of her treedome, getting Bubble Bass’ attention]
Sandy: Mermaid Bass! Mermaid Bass! I need your help!
Bubble Bass: What?
Sandy: I was doing an experiment, and, well, that happened! [points to treedome that has a massive hole in it, causing water to flow in] Soon my treedome will be more wet than glistening girl juices! My glistening girl juices, to be exact.
Bubble Bass: ...I didn’t need to hear that.
Sandy: Aren’t you the one who made an NC-17 Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy fan fiction and then jacked off to it?
Bubble Bass: That’s irrelevant. Let me go fix your house! [hightails it to the glass dome to which he spots the crack right away] This damage may be irreversible. Good thing I have my secret weapon! [sticks his hand in his pocket and pulls out a tube of super glue, which he pours into the crack to keep it from getting worse] There we go, good as new?
Sandy: [deadpan] That’s all you could do?
Bubble Bass: Hey now, super glue fixes everything. [jumps off and checks watch] Ooh, lunch time. Need to go get a bite at the Krusty Krab. Good luck. [runs off as it zooms out, showing the dome getting damaged again with more water flowing in]
Sandy: Argh….
[cuts to Bubble Bass opening the doors to the Krusty Krab. He rushes up to the counter]
Squidward: What will it be tiny, a small salad?
Bubble Bass: I'll take a double triple bossy deluxe, on a raft, four by four animal style, extra shingles with a shimmy and a squeeze, light axle grease, make it cry, burn it, and let it swim. [Squidwards stops writing when he gets to extra shingles]
Squidward: [pauses] We serve food here, sir. Plus, aren’t you the guy who’s replacing Mermaid Man?
Bubble Bass: Yes, which is why I should eat for free.
[cuts to Eugene in his office hearing “free,” causing his ears to get bigger]
Eugene: FREE?! [runs into the dining area] Who just said that horrible word?
Bubble Bass: I did. I deserve something in return for my hard work around Bikini Bottom this morning.
Eugene: You haven’t done anything this morning!
Bubble Bass: Well, uh, here’s the thing. There hasn’t been any crime yet today.
Eugene: Except for now! [reaches into Bubble Bass’ pockets and grabs a 20 dollar bill]
Bubble Bass: Hey!
Eugene: That’s for assaulting me poor ears. Now order something or get out. [walks back into his office, but gets stopped by Sheldon walking into the Krusty Krab]
Sheldon: Hey there, KRABS.
Eugene: Plankton, what is the meaning of this?
Sheldon: Ask my sidekicks! [Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy walk through the doors]
Mermaid Man: EVIL!
Barnacle Boy: No, you dumbass! You're evil, now!
Mermaid Man: Oh yeah.
[SpongeBob rushes in]
SpongeBob: What?! Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy are evil?
Bubble Bass: You didn’t actually retire?
Eugene: That porn I watched last night was ILLEGAL?! [Bubble Bass puts handcuffs around him]
Bubble Bass: AHA! First catch. [turns back] How could you two do this?
Barnacle Boy: We’re sick of being the good guys. So we joined the dark side.
Sheldon: Now give us the formula! [Bubble Bass steps on Sheldon, causing him to drop his ray gun]
Bubble Bass: Hm… that was easy. [gets a stern look] Okay, you two, you’re next.
Barnacle Boy: Hey, fatass! There’s a Krabby Patty mannequin of you over there! [points over where it reveals to actually be there]
Bubble Bass: I can’t resist! [runs over, but this attracts Mermaid Man too]
Mermaid Man: Hold up, Bubble Bass! Save some for me!
Barnacle Boy: What?! No! You’re supposed to beat him- [shows the two eating the Krabby Patties, as Bubble Bass shoves them down Mermaid Man’s throat, causing him to lay in pain]
Bubble Bass: Night night, Mermaid Man. [steps on him]
Barnacle Boy: Damn it! Well, you took those two down, but you’ll have to get through me next!
[Bubble Bass squints his eyes as he throws all of the Krabby Patties back at him. Barnacle Boy dodges them all as he reaches for an anti-gravity gun in his pocket. He zaps it at Bubble Bass, which causes him to start floating over to him, until he is hovering right over Barnacle Boy. Once he lets go, Bubble Bass kicks him the face, as he falls down.]
Bubble Bass: Whew… that was intense. Time to free these victims. [he starts reviving SpongeBob and Squidward, but then Barnacle Boy regains consciousness and charges towards him]
Barnacle Boy: Come here, Bubble Tub. [tackles him and draws a knife. Bubble Bass is now struggling on the ground trying to avoid the knife.]
Bubble Bass: [gags] Ugh...save...me…
Barnacle Boy: Hope you had a good time trying to match our legacy!
[cops start to burst into the Krusty Krab]
Officer John: FREEZE!
Barnacle Boy: What… what are you pigs doing here?
Officer Nancy: Arresting you. Book him. [John strips his knife and handcuffs him, as Nancy collects Sheldon, Eugene, and Mermaid Man]
Bubble Bass: ...man.
Officer John: Mermaid Bass, thank you for helping us bring these scallywags to justice. Your cry for help alerted us. [shakes his hand]
[cuts to Sheldon, Eugene, Mermaid Man, and Barnacle Boy being put in the car]
Officer Nancy: Barnacle Boy, I can’t believe you turned to this. You two, Mermaid Man.
Mermaid Man: Turn what? Turn you on? Well don’t mind if I do! [about to unbuckle his belt as Nancy hits him with her baton] ...I learned my lesson.
[cuts to SpongeBob helping Bubble Bass up]
SpongeBob: Well, Mermaid Bass, you saved the day. [whips out pencil and paper] Can I have your autograph.
Bubble Bass: Yes, young apprentice. But you should have this. [gives him a signed copy of his fan fiction]
SpongeBob: Ew, no. That’s even worse than the shit on the SpongeBob Fanon Wiki.
Bubble Bass: Oh come on, it’s at least better than this episode.
SpongeBob: No, it’s really not.
Bubble Bass: Oh well… I have to take care of more crime. Mermaid Bass AWAY- [bursts out of clothes again] Oh. Uh, SpongeBob, you wouldn’t happen to have a 6XL body suit on you, would you?
[episode ends]
==Trivia==
*This episode came in first place for Round 2.
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