Shanghaied: Puppycorn's ending a Spongebob Parody

My Fanfiction with Spongebob And Cartoon Crossovers
French Narrator: [Camera cuts to the exterior of The Crossover Restaurant] Closing time at the Crossover Restaurant.
SwaySway: [Counting the change in the cash register] 51, 52, 53...
Rarity: [Counting the gems] 29, 30, 31...
Vambre Warrior: [Mopping in synchronization] One, two, three. One, two, three.
Rarity: SwaySway, can we please go now?
SwaySway: Perhaps, one of our more loyal workers can enlighten you on company policy.
Vambre Warrior: [Referencing the manual] "The Crossover Restaurant Employee Manual; 2nd Revised Edition; Page 35; Section 19; Clause 3a, states: All staff must remain on the premises until the day's receipts are fully accounted for."
Rarity: But that's not fair!
Vambre Warrior: [Referencing the manual, again] "Clause 3b: The proprietor reserves the right to be unfair."
Rarity: Teacher's pet.
SwaySway: Now, Let's see... [counts money in register] five, ten, 25, blue, apple sauce, Mayonnaise. Everything looks to be in order. Except... [gasps] Where is it? [takes apart the register in search of something] Where is it?
Rarity: Where's What?
SwaySway: My dime! My special dime, the first dime I ever made! I always keep it in the back of the register for good luck!
Rarity: Well, I've never seen it. [SwaySway glares at Rarity in suspicion]
SwaySway: [suspicious] Hmm, are you prepared to say that with your hoof on a stack of interpretive newspapers? [pulls out a stack of newspapers]
Rarity: Why, Of course I'm... [makes a shocked face, she turns around, suspicious] ...What are you saying?
SwaySway: Me? I didn't saying nothing that would matter to anyone who would be willing to take a lie detector test! [holding a lie detector in his hands]
Rarity: You are saying something!
SwaySway: Heavens to Betsy, no. It's just that my lucky dime's gone missing and you've been working the cash register all day!
Rarity: Are you accusing me of something?!
SwaySway: Well, the way I see it, there are three possibilities: One, you stole it. Two, you stole it. Or three— YOU STOLE IT!!!
Rarity: [enraged] I DIDN'T STEAL YOUR PRECIOUS DIME!
SwaySway: Show me your Hooves.
Rarity: What?!
SwaySway: I wanna see every centimeter of your hooves.
Rarity: [punches SwaySway' eyes with her hooves in anger] HERE! HERE! HERE! DO YOU SEE THEM NOW?!?!  [stomps away]
SwaySway: You... you can't do that to me. I'm your boss!
Rarity: Not anymore, SwaySway. I quit! [leaves]
Vambre Warrior: [gasps in shocked] Rarity?!
Rarity: I'm outta here! I shall find my business elsewhere!
Vambre Warrior: Rarity, you're making a big mistake!
Rarity: Mistake? Ha! The only mistake I ever made was wasting my life at the Crossover Restaurant!
Vambre Warrior: But a visit to the Crossover Restaurant makes everyone happy. And what could be better than serving up smiles? [smiles really big]
Rarity: If SwaySway is involved with "others", then Being dead or anything else is better!
Vambre Warrior: Oh, my… I never knew you felt so strongly about it.
Rarity: Where have you been?
Vambre Warrior: Well, I guess I can't stop you. But Rarity, it's a cold, cold world out there. No one's going to serve you happiness on a silver platter. [Applejack appears with apples on a silver platter and offers Vambre an apple]
Applejack: Free sample?
Vambre Warrior: Sure! [Takes one, and eats it]
Rarity: Can I have one? [Applejack is already gone]
Vambre Warrior: Anyways, I just want you to know, if you ever get in trouble, come find any of us. We'll be more than happy to take care of you. Like Applejack over there who took in Jiminy Cricket, I'm sure she'll do the same for you. And of course, I'd do the same. 'Cause you and me... [grabs Rarity and pulls her toward herself] You're more than just a friend. [getting closer to Rarity] ...You're like a sister to me. [Rarity screams and leaps away from Vambre.]
Rarity: Thanks for your concern, Vambre. But I don't need your help, I think I'm more than capable of taking care of myself. Because, I am ready to unlock my potential. No one has just one single talent. I could be anything I set my mind to. [imagines herself in various following jobs] …I could be a chef, or a musician, or a space pony.
Vambre Warrior: Or a musician cooking food in space... with a long flowing mane.
Rarity: [narrows her eyes] Um.... yes... uh-huh. You know, that reminds me, there's been something I've been wanting to say to you since the day we met... Farewell for now, Vambre. The Next time you lay your eyes upon to see me, this town will be eating out of the bottom of my hooves like no one has ever seen! 
[the scene skips to a homeless Rarity in a messy condition. She is in a box and she's trying to get spare change in a cup from passersby]
Rarity: Spare change? Spare change, ma'am?
Vambre Warrior: Rarity?! Rarity, is that you?!
Rarity: Um, I, uh... [closes her box]
Vambre Warrior: You know me. [opens her box up] I'm, Vambre Warrior.
Rarity: Vambre?
Vambre Warrior: There you go. I told everyone what happened between you and SwaySway. So, where you living these days?
Tycoon: Rarity?
Rarity: Yes?
Tycoon: Sign here please. 
[Rarity signs and Tycoon takes her box]
Rarity: Uh... nowhere.
Vambre Warrior: Great. And what have you been doing with yourself? No, wait, let me guess! Hmmm... I see you've been working on your mane, the tattered clothes, the awful smell... I think I know you were sure to be... a Chef?
Rarity: No.
Vambre Warrior: A musician?
Rarity: No.
Vambre Warrior: A spacepony?
Rarity: No.
Vambre Warrior: A musician cooking food in space-
Rarity: Don't you get it? [sobs] I'm a failure-e-er! I'm no good at anything! I have tried cooking, I have tried being a delivery mare, I have tried being a librarian… NOTHING!!!!
Vambre Warrior: [gasps] What happened that made you like this?
Rarity: I tried to cook with Chowder and Mung Daal, but the ingredients were scattered everywhere. It was messy and chaotic! I tried to work with Zorch on delivery and transporting items, but all that work was messing up my mane! My mane! And then, I tried being a librarian with Twilight in her castle, but all those books were so dusty and wasn't good for my coat and face! There's absolutely nothing for me out there! 
[Rarity starts to cry out a fountain of tears into Vambre. Vambre soaks it up and becomes bigger, but she squishes herself to let the water out]
Vambre Warrior: There, there, it's okay, Rarity. You can come live with me. 
[The scene is shown at the Warriors For Hire Headquarters]
Vambre Warrior: Here you go, Rarity. You can sleep in my bed. [Rarity is laying in Vambre's bed]
Rarity: Okay, but just until I get a job. One day... two days tops.
Vambre Warrior: [baby talk] Nonsense. You stay as long as you need to. [kisses Rarity on her cheek] Good night, my little angel.
[the next morning, Vambre rings a bell to wake Rarity]
Vambre Warrior: Good morning, Rarity! I hope you're hungry. [made a big breakfast for Rarity] You're gonna need to build up your strength again so I laid out a big buffet for you. 
Rarity: And in bed, too? Aw, thank you so much, Vambre. I can't thank you enough. 
Vambre Warrior: You're welcome, Rarity. Now here comes the plane. [makes plane noises while attempting to put some food in Rarity's mouth with a spoon]
Rarity: It's absolutely marvelous of you to help me in my time of need. [swallows the food] I'll try not to be a burden.
Vambre Warrior: It's no trouble. Is there anything else I can do for you, winner?
Rarity: No, no, no. You've already... well...
[Montage time]
[The scene shows Vambre putting lotion on her hand and then massaging Rarity's head, feeding her grapes, massaging her Hooves, spraying her mane with hairspray and wiping it, massaging her back, giving her a baby bottle, blowing her mane with a Blow dryer Magisword, giving her an acupuncture, and polishing her mane and seeing her reflection]
[End of montage]
Vambre Warrior: [tired] Wow. Nurturing a broken spirit sure is a lot of work. [throws the blanket upwards and it lands on her as she lies on the sofa] I'm bushed. Still, it feels nice to do good. [turns the lamp off then yawns] Good night, Prohyas.
Rarity: Excuse me, Vambre? can I get a glass of water? 
[The bottom floor light turns on and Vambre marches up stairs and turns on the light to give Rarity the water]
Vambre Warrior: Here you go.
Rarity: Thank you.
Vambre Warrior: Good night. [marches back down stairs and turns off the light]
Rarity: Vambre, could I get some more blankets? [Vambre marches upstairs again turning on the lights on the way up there]
Vambre Warrior: Here you go.
Rarity: Thank you.
Vambre Warrior: Good night. [goes downstairs again, accidentally leaving Rarity's light on]
Rarity: Vambre, you forgot to turn out the light! [Vambre marches upstairs]
Vambre Warrior: Good night. [turns off light and when she walks downstairs she trips and makes lots of noises]
Prohyas Warrior: Rarity is such a freeloader, isn't she?
Vambre Warrior: [gasps] Prohyas! Rarity is not a freeloader and she would never take advantage of me.
French Narrator: Three weeks later...
Vambre Warrior: [exhausted] She's just having a hard time getting her confidence back. [falls down]
French Narrator: Many months later...
Vambre Warrior: [even more exhausted. Prohyas looks tired as well] I'm sure she's close to a breakthrough. [falls down]
British Narrator: So much later that the old narrator got tired of waiting and they had to hire a new one...
[Vambre drags herself into the room, by now utterly exhausted. Prohyas doesn't look sympathetic, though.]
Prohyas Warrior: You know, she's still isn't looking for work. Right?
Vambre Warrior: [annoyed] Of course I already know, Prohyas! Don't rub it in!
Rarity: VAMBRE! WHERE'S MY LEMONADE?!?!
Vambre Warrior: Coming, Rarity. [She falls flat on her face]
Rarity: [Vambre is running down the hallway] Vambre?! Vambre?! DARLING, WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Vambre Warrior: [enters her bedroom] I'm right here Rarity.
Rarity: It's about time you got here!
Vambre Warrior: [sardonically] Here you go, Your Majesty.
Rarity: I can't drink that!
Vambre Warrior: Why not?
Rarity: Are you blind?! Just look at it! [close-up of the lemonade]
Vambre Warrior: [becomes irritated] What about it?
Rarity: That lemon has three seeds in it! THAT'S AN ODD NUMBER!!! A proper mare doesn't consume to eat anything odd numbered!
Vambre Warrior: Fine! I'll just take it out! [takes out lemon and Rarity goes crazy]
Rarity: NO!! NO!! It's already contaminated by the bad lemon! It won't work!
Vambre Warrior: [annoyed] Hmm,… that's two things in this house that... won't work! [she's referring to Rarity and the lemonade]
Rarity: Then go fix them!
Vambre Warrior: [grips the glass of lemonade so hard that it shatters] Two things that... WON'T WORK! [clenches her fists and trembles in anger]
Rarity: I've changed my mind! I want soup instead!
Vambre Warrior: Okay!... Don't move! [walks out the bedroom door. She then closes the door]
Vambre Warrior: [comes back in with a bowl of steaming soup] Here you go! It's alphabet soup!... I made it special.
[the camera shows the soup with the phrase "GET A JOB" in alphabet letters but then Rarity slaps it out of Vambre's hands]
Rarity: Condensed soup from a can?! Just dreadful and Disgusting! Now you've ruined my appetite! Go fetch me something to read!
Vambre Warrior: Oh, okay! How about you read THIS?! [pulls out a newspaper with the "job listings" page on the front]
Rarity: [gasps and swats the newspaper away. Vambre becomes more angry] Get that away from me! You know I'm allergic to newsprint!
Vambre Warrior: [giggles] You know, The way when you swatted that newspaper out of my hands, it reminded me of something what Witchy Simone did... at her JOB! [Vambre's alarm clock blows her away] 
Rarity: 4:00! Time for my stories! Hurry up, Vambre, they won't hold the show while you laze around!
[Vambre rolls in a TV and gives Rarity a remote. Rarity turns it on to see two puppets: a white puppet with purple hair, which represents Rarity, and a peach colored one wearing a green shirt and a yellow cape similar to Vambre]
Puppet #1: [puppet #2 is whistling] Hey, where are you going?
Puppet #2: To my job!
Puppet #1: You have a job?
Puppet #2: Why wouldn't I? I'm not some lazy, inconsiderate jerk who lays in bed all day!
Puppet #1: Say, where can I get one of these... jobs?
Puppet #2: Oh, they're everywhere! [the camera moves back in the room, showing Vambre making voices with the puppets] Especially if you're white and have a purple mane.
Puppet #1: Thanks! I'm gonna go look for one, so I can stop...
Vambre Warrior: ...MOOCHING OFF MY FRIENDS AND THEY CAN GET BACK TO THEIR LIVES!!!
Rarity: This isn't my show! [presses the remote, but nothing happens] Vambre, the remote control is broken! Get over here and fix it!
Vambre Warrior: [angrily] I've got a BETTER idea! [throws the TV away and jumps on top of Rarity in bed] Why don't I call someone whose JOB it is to fix it?! You know why?! Because when I need a JOB [pokes Rarity's nose] done, I get someone with a JOB [pokes Rarity's nose again] to do [pokes Rarity's nose for the third time] that JOB!!!! [pokes Rarity's nose for the fourth time]
Rarity: [narrows her eyelids] What are you saying?
[This turns out to be the last straw.] 
[Outside, it is day. the Warriors For Hire Headquarters jumps into the air before the side is smashed out as a furious Vambre pushes the bed, with Rarity still in it, outside and towards the Crossover Restaurant while screaming in total fury.]
Vambre Warrior: [Screaming in total fury] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[The scene cuts to SwaySway, who is talking on his phone]
SwaySway: [talking on his phone] Donate to the children's fund? Why? What have children ever done for me? 
[Vambre suddendly appears inside SwaySway's office, she grabs the phone and throws it away]
Vambre Warrior: You want your dime back?! [takes one out] TAKE IT!!! Now Rarity can have her job back, right?!?! [SwaySway checks the dime through a telescope]
SwaySway: Wrong! [throws the dime at Vambre's face] That wasn't my first dime!
Vambre Warrior: Then have some more dimes! Take them! [throws out more dimes at SwaySway' face. SwaySway narrows his eyes] I've got plenty of them!
SwaySway: You can't put a price on my first dime! And I can't forgive that thieving bilge rat Rarity for stealing it!
Vambre Warrior: [finally snaps in extreme rage, grabbing SwaySway by the throat and holding him up in the air] LISTIN, YOU BREADWINNER MANAGER! RARITY HAS BEEN LIVING WITH ME FOR MONTHS NOW! AND THE WAY SHE'S TREATING ME IS DRIVING ME CRAZY!!!! [shakes him vigorously with wide open and bloodshot eyes] AND YOU FIRED HER AND YOU'RE SERIOUSLY NOT GONNA HIRE HER BACK ALL BECAUSE OF A STUPID DIME?!?!?!?! [a prehistoric dime falls out of SwaySway's back pocket. Vambre suddenly calms down and lets go of SwaySway] What's that?
SwaySway: [gasps in happiness] My first dime! [hugs the dime] Oh, Dimey, I'll never lose you again!
Vambre Warrior: This is a dime?
SwaySway: I've been in business a long time. Vambre.
Vambre Warrior: But how do you not notice something that big—?... Never mind about that. So, if Rarity never stole the dime, she can come back to the Carousel Boutique and work here in the Crossover Restaurant, right?
SwaySway: Of course, Vambre, just let me and my dime have our privacy. [kisses the dime.] 
[Vambre cheers before running off]
Vambre Warrior: Woooo-hoo-hoooo!!!
[Rarity is now back at the Crossover Restaurant]
SwaySway: [at the counter] Well, Rarity, it's good to have you back.
Rarity: Well, it's kind of good to be back, SwaySway.
SwaySway: It's all water under the bridge now.
Rarity: I agree, sir.
SwaySway: After all, I'm sure you didn't mean to misplace my dime.
Rarity: That's right, and- [stopped and then glared] What the... What are you saying?
SwaySway: Well, it's obvious that you put the dime in my pants. Dimes just don't fly into people's pockets.
Rarity: Are you accusing me of something?! 
[Rarity and SwaySway start to argue, while Vambre gets annoyed, she turns around and began hitting her head on the wall, ready for the inevitable]
SwaySway: Well, the way I see it, there are three possibilities: One, you put the dime in my pants. [outside the Crossover Restaurant] Two, you put the dime in my pants. Or three, YOU PUT THE DIME IN MY PANTS!!!
THE END.
Category:Unikitty Parodies
Category:Spongebob Parodies
Category:Parodies