A team full of yukkuri

so this is how it goes:
some of my friends found a group of 9 yukkuri that lived in a cave near outside our village. Thinking about this we decided to fill a report for the factory about them.
those yukkuri were peculiar.
one had a baseball cap with what it seemed a sound earpiece (info taken from kourindou), and it was fast, slightly faster than a kimeemaru.
another one had a soldiers helmet, and it sometimes said "MAGGOTS".
a third one was like a living gas mask...
the fourth one looked a little slow but slightly bigger and heavier than its team.
a fifth one had a worker's helmet and some working googles.
the sixth one was brown and it had an eyepatch, and it looked like it was drunk.
the seventh had a western style hat with one of its sides folded, and it was mumbling "wanker".
the eighth had glasses and it had a peculiar accent.
the last one had a burlgar's mask covering its face, saying "gentlemen, mentlegen".
we decided to put some survelliance cameras in their cave so we could study them more. we gave our reports to the factory.
some days later, while doing some survelliance, factory workers entered the cave, to harvest the yukkuris.
the yukkuris were confused as they watched 5 factory workers surrounding them.
who are you maggots?- said the yukkuri with the soldier hat
oh we are some guys that are going to take you to a place for you to take it easy- said the factory worker, obiously lying.
go away wankers!!!!- said a yukkuri
the factory workers were pissed at the yukkuri which they remover its hat.
WANKERS!!!!- said the yukkuri while drawing out a mini size sniper rifle.
SURRENDER MAGOTS AND YOU WILL NOT BE HARMED!!!- said the yukkuri with the soldier's hat as he readied a mini size rocket launcher.
let us wrestle little man!!!!- said the heavy yukkuri as he grew up arms with mini boxing gloves.
the yukkuri charged fowward at the factory workers.
factory worker no.1 was beaten to death by the yukkuri with the earpiece with a baseball bat.
factory worker no.2 was gibbed by the yukkuri with the glasses with a bonesaw.
factory worker no.3 was burned into a crisp by the gasmask yukkuri (it could breath fire) and eaten alive by the heavy yukkuri the haevy yukkuri was sayin "OM NOM NOM NOM".
factory worker no.4 managed to kill the worker's hat yukkuri, not knowing that it deployed some sort of mechanism that shot him with bullets and finally head shotted by the yukkuri with the now recovered hat.
fatory worker no.5 after seeing all of this ran away, then the yukkuri with the mask, suddenly appeared in front of him wielding a butterfly knife., it begain to cut and stab its face. after screaming in pain the factory worker was blewn up by the brown yukkuri with some sort of self made explosive.
after this, all of the yukkuri found some hats neat the now dead factory workers, the yukkuri tried them on and the liked it.
what happened afterwards is that the corpse of the dead yukkuri desapeared between the commotion and the yukkuri appeared somewhere else, acting as if its death didn't happened.
we were amazed as we tried to make some conclusions out of this:
those yukkuri work as a team.
those yukkuri are smart.
those yukkuri worry about their hats as it were its life.
they are willing to kill anyone who takes its hats away.
they can revive, and still retain its memories.
highly dangerous.
so the nezt days more factory workers arrived, they met the same fate their previous comrades suffered. we found this silgthly hilarious. one of my friends disappeared, he was saying something about making something out of this...