Transcripts 2002-02

Transcripts from February 2002 strips.
==February 1==
Panel 1Anne sits on the toilet in the bathroom and stares downwards, introspective.Caption (Anne thinking): Oh God! I'm scared to take this test now! What if I AM pregnant? What will I do then? Do I really want to raise a child with a man who has no real job and sits at home all day watching "Bob the Builder"? ... Actually, that could work out! He can stay home with the kid and I can still work...But do I really trust Richard enough to look after a baby? I love him to bits but he's the most idle sod I've ever met!Panel 2Flashback: Steven is standing behind Anne and rubbing her shoulders. They appear to be outdoors, in between two conifers and with a red letter box? in the background.Caption (Anne thinking): ... That's another thing, love! I've been with Richard for three years and we've had our share of arguments but we've always made up. Huh, once I believed if you loved someone enough you always made up! Steven showed me that just one incident could ruin a long-time partnership. I was destroyed when he left me and Richard COULD do the same when I needed him most...Panel 3Flashback: Anne is sitting on a chair and holding Red under her chin.Caption (Anne thinking): Who am I kidding! I'm just as bad! Remember "Red" you selfish bitch? You treated her like shit and she put up with it because she adored you! So what did you do? "Oh, sorry Red but you where just an experiment!" or something like that! She ran off crying and you never saw her again! Huh, if I'd stayed with her then I wouldn't be in this mess! Last time I looked it was very hard for another woman to knock you up!
==February 4==
Panel 1Anne rolls her eyes as she continues to sit on the toilet.Anne (thinking): Bloody hell! I've not thought about Steven or Red in a long time! I guess the few bad moments block out all the good memories I had of those two!Panel 2Anne leans back thoughtfully, with her hand over her mouth.Anne: ...Panel 3Anne breaks into a mischievous grin.Anne (thinking): Actually, if I'm in the mood I might have a good, long think on some of those "good memories" later!
==February 8==
Panel 1Richard sits on the couch with his face in his hands as Norman squats down from behind the couch with a sneer on his face.Norman: Hehe! So you've managed to knock Anne up huh? What did uncle Normay say about playing safe?Richard: Who cares? I don't take advice from someone who's never seen a real twat before!Panel 2Richard scowls at Norman, whose grin becomes even smarmier.Norman: Ooo, your wrong there! You know, someone should really tell Anne that her nightshirt is a bit too short! Mind that would ruin me and Kingston's jollys each morning when she bends over to pick the milk out of the fridge!
==February 11==
Panel 1Richard sits with his face in his hand, looking to the side.Richard (thinking): Assuming she is pregnant and she want's to keep it (she knows her options and I'm not stupid enough to suggest them to her) then I guess we'd have to get married! For finical reasons then any type of traditional obligation!Panel 2Flashback: Richard is sitting on a couch with Red and Crystal cosying up to him.Caption (Richard thinking): I love her but... I dunno! I want to stay a "free spirit" or some bollocks like that! I haven't looked at another woman for three years (well, maybe once or twice) so I don't see why I'm so bothered about making it final. I still get memories of some fun times. Like when I was at college living in a flat with two girls who shared the rent and ME! Marriage spells bye-bye to mind-blowing threesomes!Panel 3Richard is still sitting on the couch with his face in his hands, now looking upward in dismay. The camera is angled so to show a large tear in the material on the side of the armrest. The kitchen? door is open, and a green bowl is on a table in the background.Richard (thinking): Ha! I said bye-bye to that years ago! Anne is the first real relationship I've had! All the others were "just for fun"... Still missed them when they left though... maybe I do want some stability in my life!
==February 15==
Panel 1Richard leans on the couch armrest, staring blankly into the camera, his cheek resting on his palm and ears folded back.Richard (thinking): Well at least I know ONE thing for certain! If we have a baby...Panel 2The camera rotates 180 degrees to show the back of Richard's head in the foreground as he watches a wild-eyed Kingston raging in anger at Norman, who is sneering and keeping Kingston at arm's length by holding his face. In Norman's other hand is a green bong.Kingston (SCREAMING): AAAAAHHH! GIVE ME MY FUCKIN' BONG BACK!!Norman: Uh-uh! This thing is bad for you!Norman: I'm only thinking of your health! *snigger*Richard (thinking): Those two have to go!
==February 18==
Panel 1Anne sits on the toilet, staring at the pregnancy test stick in her hand.Caption (Anne thinking): Well, here goes nothing! How long does it take for this thing to work?Panel 2Close-up of the test stick in Anne's hand.Caption (Anne thinking): What was it again? One bar means the test has worked and there's no baby. Two bars...Panel 3Same as panel 1 but the camera has rotated to view Anne face-on. A shelf with some knick-knacks on it is in the background.Anne (thinking): Two mean I have to cut Richard's balls off!
==February 22==
Panel 1Anne stares at the test strip, nervously gritting her teeth.Anne: Oh crap, it's changing colour!Anne: This is it! ...Panel 2Al has a big grin on his face and waves a hand in the air.Al: HIYA KIDS!It's Uncle Al here to talk to you about "Leaving readers in suspense!"Panel 3Al sneers into the camera.Al: It's a piss poor trick used by bad Australian soap operas to get people to come back again next time by not telling them the outcome straight away! Next time I'll talk to you about "Milking it" by dragging on the story line for ages!
==February 25==
Panel 1Richard is anxiously grasping Anne by the shoulders. Anne is anxious from his reaction.Richard: What did it say! What did it say!Anne: Er, Richard, what would you do if I said, theoretically, that the test was positive and I am pregnant?Panel 2Anne is staring at the floor in concern as she puts a hand over her heart. Gurgling bubbles are floating up from the floor.Anne (thinking): Well I didn't expect much from you, but not fainting would have been good! Not curling up into a ball while sucking your thumb would've been even better!Richard: *mother*
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