Unnamed Black Friday Episode

Black Friday Extravaganza is the # episode of CuldeeFell Shortz! Season 2
== Script ==
SYNOPSIS - Christmas is coming next month, and Culdee wants to find gifts for each of his friends, so he decides to come up with a plan in order to get gifts for his friend, all while coming up with a plan to survive every shopping employee's worst fear, "Black Friday"...
(It starts off outside the town hall where Culdee and the users are seen walking out)
RH: Man it was nice of Crash to host a big thanksgiving dinner for all of us.
Endless: True. I’m stuffed.
MarioFan2009: You can say that again.
Slugslingee: So what are you guys planning after thanksgiving.
DarthSaiyan8697: Well Black Friday is tomorrow.
Endless: Aka the day that’s hell for retailers.
MarioFan2009: True. Good thing I'm not working retail.
Culdee: Well that was fun, though I think I'm gonna go home after eating so much.
RH: Same here. Same time tomorrow?
Users: Cya.
(Everyone heads home. Culdee walks over to his car with JJ and Lil Fred walking in as well)
JJ: Man thanksgiving was really fun.
Lil Fred: “honk” (Can agree with that)
(The three walk into the car)
Culdee: Well that was fun! Time to drive home.
(Culdee drives off as the radio plays)
Goodman: (Radio) Happy Thanksgiving to everyone and I hope you all have a great time with your families. As Thanksgiving is now over, that means tomorrow is Black Friday, meaning all deals in Pen Mart are 60% off.
JJ: Wow, 60%? That’s a steal.
Lil Fred: “honk” (True, though may god have mercy on the souls of all retailers)
(Eventually Culdee parks in his garage and the three walk out)
Lil Fred: “honk” (If anyone needs me i’m gonna be watching TV)
JJ: Okay! I’m gonna go draw.
Culdee: Okay have fun guys.
(Culdee then walks into the basement. Lil Fred is seen watching TV. JJ walks only to look down and see a penny)
JJ: “gasp” A penny!
(JJ picks it up)
JJ: Maybe this is my lucky day!
(Suddenly JJ slips and her penny falls down and rolls away)
JJ: Uh oh!
(JJ chases after the penny and it falls down the basement)
JJ: Get back here you penny!
(JJ runs down the basement and sees the Penny and picks it up)
JJ: Gotcha!
(JJ then hears writing)
JJ: Huh?
(JJ walks over to the noise and sees Culdee writing on a board)
JJ: Culdee?
Culdee: Huh? Oh hey JJ, you need something?
JJ: I just came down here to grab a penny. What are you doing?
Culdee: Well i’m glad you asked.
(Lil Fred walks into the basement)
Lil Fred: “Honking” (Yo Culdee we ran out of Cherry Berry- uh what's going on downhere)
Culdee: Oh hey Lil Fred! Since you two are down here I might as well explain what my plan is.
Lil Fred: “honk” (What plan?)
(Culdee pulls a white blanket off of a board with layers of paper)
Culdee: I introduce you to Culdee’s Black Friday Extravaganza!
JJ: Oooh.
Lil Fred: “honk” (Eh.)
Culdee: Anyways, what CBFE is is my plan for Black Friday that i have been thinking of for the past well forever now. Basically it’s my way of giving back to the people at SML Wiki Headquarters for helping me stand where I am today.
JJ: Aw that sounds nice!
Culdee: Anyways, I have been analyzing some info about my friends and what I feel like would be a good gift for them. And after months of thinking, I have come up with some gift ideas. Starting with…
(Culdee pulls the paper away revealing a board about RH)
Culdee: RH! From as far as I can remember, RH was one of the first people who introduced me to the wiki and Pensacola in general. One important thing I know about RH is that his favorite food is “chicken wings”, though he doesn’t cook as he usually orders them off of uber eats.
JJ: Maybe you will give him something so he can cook chicken wings himself?
Culdee: Correct which is why I decided to give him…
(Culdee pulls a paper)
Culdee: An Air Fryer! So anytime he wants, he can make Chicken Wings in the safety of his own home in just five minutes, and he won’t have to worry about giving a big tip to the uber eats delivery driver.
Lil Fred: “honk” (Huh. That’s kinda smart)
Culdee: Thanks. And after that we have everyone's favorite mouthless immortal.
(Culdee pulls the board away revealing one about Endless)
Culdee: Endless Possibilities. Now if you know Endless like I do, you would know he’s a fan of a little fun and a challenge once in a while. So what is something adventurous that I can give to a friend? I thought about it and I got just the thing!
(Culdee pulls a tab)
Culdee: A Bike!
Lil Fred: “honk” (That’s kinda lame)
Culdee: Yeah well it’s the best I can come up with cause to be honest, Endless is a mystery. Now after Endless, after Endless we have…
(Culdee pulls another board)
Culdee: MarioFan2009. Now MarioFan is usually a busy person, having to work all day every day, fixing grammatical errors, and making story plans. Kinda makes a person a little insane.
JJ: So what are you gonna give him?
Culdee: Something that calms the minds of anyone. An Ipod! Working is a bit tough, but listening to your favorite music can easily get rid of stress while even working the toughest jobs.
JJ: Interesting.
Culdee: Now after MarioFan, we have Darth Saiyan. Now I don’t know much about Darth as we ain't close, but Darth is into anime, mainly Dragon Ball Z to be exact. Which is why I have decided to gift him a Flat Screen TV!
Lil Fred: “honk” (Wait, isn't that expensive?)
Culdee: Yes, but I’ll talk about the prices and budget later. Then after Darth, we have Slugslingee. Now Slugs likes lots of things like video games and such, so I decided to give him the Xbox Series X, so he has way more games to play!
Lil Fred: “honk” (Interesting)
Culdee: Though last but not least, we have the boss himself, Trikkiboy. See Trikkiboy, has been my manager for the past well forever now, and through all my f-ck ups and bull shit, he still held his patience, well for the most part. So I wanna give him the greatest gift of all!
JJ: And what would that be?
(Culdee is about to explain but he looks at his watch)
Culdee: Oh crap it’s 8:00 pm I gotta go to bed!
JJ: Wait 8pm? But that’s earlier when you usually sleep.
Culdee: True, but I need to wake up early in the morning tomorrow in order to get my gifts at Pen Mart.
Lil Fred: “Honk” (But tomorrow's Black Friday)
Culdee: Exactly. Because everythings 60 percent off, that will be my one chance to get all of the gifts for my friends for a low price! You see, buying all those gifts on a normal day would drain my bank account, so what better time than black friday to buy them, because if I did my math correctly, with all of those deals, that leaves me under my 1000 dollar budget!
JJ: That’s… really smart!
Lil Fred: “honking” (Yeah but are you sure? I mean people get really hectic on Black Friday. And I mean… really hectic…)
Culdee: True. But luckily I have my battle plan.
JJ: What is it?
Culdee: I would say more, but I better get to bed to wake up bright and early. Not everyday is Black Friday, you know. Anyways, good night!
(Culdee runs off)
JJ: What is he getting for Trikkiboy anyway?
(Lil Fred looks to the board and reads something)
JJ: Well?
Lil Fred: “honk” (Apparently he’s getting him a-)
(But it then cuts to the next morning. Brooklyn Guy is seen waking up and walking out of the house)
Brooklyn Guy: Alright Karen i’m going to work at the Pen Mart.
Karen: Now? After thanksgiving?
Brooklyn Guy: Apparently they need as much as employees as they can for black friday.
Karen: Oh, well have fun Boinie!
Brooklyn Guy: Yeah i’m not gonna have fun at all.
(Brooklyn gets in his car and drives off. It cuts back to Culdee’s house where he is sleeping. His alarm beeps and he wakes up)
Culdee: Alright! Time to get into action!
(Culdee speedruns his morning routine and then gets in his car. He brings out a list)
Culdee: Got my list all written. Just gotta hope this all goes according to plan. I only have one chance.
(Culdee drives off. It cuts to the Pen Mart where a bunch of people are seen outside)
Culdee: Jesus, there are more people than I thought there would be.
(Brooklyn Guy is seen driving and sees the crowd)
Brooklyn Guy: … Fffffffffff-ck….
(Everyone is seen chatting as they are waiting for the doors to open. Brooklyn Guy walks up to the door)
Brooklyn Guy: (Okay. You can do this Brookie. You survived many different invasions, surely Black Friday won’t be the end of you. Okay enough stalling. Time to open the doors.)
(Brooklyn slowly inhales and exhales. He then unlocks the doors and as soon as the doors open the crowd races towards the store. Brooklyn runs and hides behind a cash register)
Brooklyn Guy: “sigh” And so it begins…
(Culdee races into the store)
Culdee: Alright, looks like the day begun. I need to get my first gift. Okay so RH’s gift is an air fryer. That should be in the appliances.
(Culdee runs off as he sees many people fighting over items. Such as Sonic and Mario fighting over a turkey and Tari and Firestar fighting over a jukebox. Culdee rushes into the appliances section where Shrek grabs a toaster oven)
Shrek: Finally! I can make my own cheesecake!
(Blue and Red Yoshi then kick him away)
Blue Yoshi: Sorry, but we’re gonna use this to make our own cake!
Shrek: GIMME BACK MY OVEN YOU LIZARDS!
Red Yoshi: You dare challenge us?
(Shrek grabs two rolling pins)
Shrek: EN GARDE!
(The two demons turn into demons and fight against the one man army Shrek. Culdee sees an air fryer and puts it in his shopping cart)
Culdee: Alright, next is a bike for Endless. Let’s move out.
(Brooklyn Guy is seen scanning a bunch of carrots for Bugs Bunny)
Bugs Bunny: Hurry up, can you take any slower?
Brooklyn Guy: I’m going as fast as I can man. It’s not my fault you bought over 1000 carrots! You don’t even need that much carrots anyway!
Bugs Bunny: That is NOT true, you can never have enough carrots
Brooklyn Guy: “Sigh” I f-cking can’t right now.
(The pen mart manager than runs up)
Manager: Brooklyn! There was a mess made in Aisle 17. We need you to clean it up.
Brooklyn Guy: What!? Why me!? Why can’t the others do it!?
Manager: They uh, been trampled by a bunch of people trying to get a PS6.
Brooklyn Guy: “sigh” Of course it has to be the PS6. Well i’ll do it after im done letting this guy purchase his carrots.
Manager: Guy i’m sorry but we really don’t have time to waste.
Brooklyn Guy: Ugh fine.
(Brooklyn walks off)
Bugs Bunny: Hey what about my carrots!?
(Brooklyn runs to Aisle 17 and sees a bunch of soda spilled on the floor)
Brooklyn Guy: “sigh” Damn soda.
(Brooklyn Guy grabs a mop and starts mopping up the mess as Culdee runs past him to the bike section and he sees a grey one)
Culdee: That’s perfect.
(Culdee runs towards the bike only to hear)
Jeffy: OUT OF MY WAY!
(Jeffy is seen riding down with a bike. Culdee runs out the way making Jeffy crash into Boko sending him flying them off of their bike)
Jeffy and Boko: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-
(The two crash into a crate full of big bouncy balls sending balls flying everywhere. Do not take that out of context. A few bouncy balls then land on Brooklyn Guy)
Brooklyn Guy: OW! WHO’S THROWING BALLS AT ME!? (Again don’t take that out of context)
Matt Major: HEY EVERYONE! THEY ARE SELLING PS6S OVER IN THIS AISLE!
Brooklyn Guy: Uh oh.
(Brooklyn runs as a crowd runs his way. It cuts back to Culdee where he grabs the bike and puts it in a shopping cart)
Culdee: Alright next up is the ipod. That should be in… uh oh… electronics.
(In the electronics aisle, everyone is seen going crazy fighting over video games and consoles, and especially the PS6. Fatass is seen running off with the PS6 only for Black Yoshi to crash into him)
Fatass: AGH-
Black Yoshi: HAHA FOLK! THIS PS6 IS MINE-
(Suddenly the Murder Squad come crashing in with a shopping cart sending Black Yoshi crashing into a wall)
Murder Man: Sorry pal, I've waited too long to finally get a console. BIG CHUNGUS 3 AND KNUCKLES HERE WE COME!
(Jeffygeist is seen quickly grabbed the console)
Murder Man: WHAT THE!
Jeffygeist: HAHAH! SUCKA! JEFFYGEIST WINS AGAIN-
(Brooklyn Guy accidentally rams into a shelf causing it to fall onto Jeffygeist crushing him)
Brooklyn Guy: Oh god why did I sign up for this. I already have 50 other jobs!
???: Tell me about it.
(Brooklyn turns around to see Bronx Dude)
Bronx Dude: Hello again Brook.
Brooklyn Guy: What!? Bronx Dude!? I thought I killed you!
Bronx Dude: You only knocked me out. I left that pizza box ten hours after I was stuffed in there.
Brooklyn Guy: Huh. Wait so you got a job here too?
Bronx Dude: Yeah since I lost all my other jobs.
Brooklyn Guy: How's that for a peanut butter loser sandwich?
Bronx Dude: Ugh save me the roasts. Right now i'm focused on finding a way out of here.
Brooklyn Guy: Same here. At this point I don’t care if I get fired, this place will be the death of me.
Bronx Dude: I have a plan..
(Culdee sees Junior Joseph and Cody fighting over a mortal kombat game)
Junior: IT’S MINE!
Joseph: NO DUDE I SAW IT FIRST!
Cody: LET GO!
(Culdee sees them along with other characters fighting in the way of the ipod section)
Culdee: Crap they are in the way of the Ipod. Um. 
(A light turns on over Culdee)
Culdee: THEY’RE SELLING MORE MORTAL KOMBAT 1 COPIES IN AISLE 11!
(Everyone stops what they are doing and runs off. Culdee runs to the ipod and puts it in the shopping cart)
Culdee: That’s down. Now to get that flat screen TV.
(Culdee runs over to the entertainment section where he sees Saiko carrying a jukebox)
Saiko: Man, 60% off for a jukebox is such a steal!
(Bob Bobowski is seen running off with a stack of flat screen TVs)
Bob: Hell yeah, I’m getting all of these TVs for just under a thousand bucks-
(Bob trips over Mouse carrying some gift cards which ends with him tripping)
Mouse: AGH-
Bob: OH CRAP-
(The TV stack falls down and falls on Saiko and Mouse making a bunch of them fall down and break, but one is caught by Culdee and put in a shopping cart)
Culdee: Gotcha!
Mouse: Oooohhh that smarts.
Saiko: DAMN IT BOB, YOU DON’T EVEN NEED THAT MUCH TVS!
Bob: Well sorry that I’d rather have another hobby than listening to your overrated music all day!
(Saiko gets pissed off and grabs her hammer. It cuts back to Culdee with his shopping cart)
Bob: (OS) OW MY OVARIES!
Culdee: Okay, that’s four gifts down. Now to get that Xbox Series X. To the gaming section!
(Culdee races off. Brooklyn Guy and Bronx Dude are seen sneaking behind shelves)
Brooklyn Guy: You see the exit anywhere.
Bronx Dude: I think so.
Brooklyn Guy: Okay so what’s the plan again?
Bronx Dude: We just need to sneak over there and hope no one in the store needs assistance from an employee.
Brooklyn Guy: Alright. Let’s make a run for it.
(The two race off. A crowd is seen storming a toy aisle)
Person 1: DANG IT WHERE ARE THE STAR WARS LEGOS!
Person 2: I see employees over there! Let’s ask them!
(The crowd runs over to the two)
Brooklyn Guy: OH CRAP!
Bronx Dude: KEEP RUNNING!
(They are about to make it to the exit but then another crowd blocks them)
Person 3: I WANNA SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER!
Brooklyn Guy: NO THE EXIT!
Bronx Dude: SHUT UP AND RUN OVER HERE!
(The two run towards the top of a long shelf. Bronx Dude sees an emergency exit far away)
Bronx Dude: Shit the exit is far away, uh… Brook, can you stand still for a bit?
Brooklyn Guy: Huh?
(Bronx Dude jumps on top of Brooklyn Guy over to a scaffolding)
Brooklyn Guy: Alright, I helped you up, now give me a hand!
(Bronx Dude smiles evilly)
Bronx Dude: Your Mario friend ain't here to help you now.
(Bronx runs off)
Brooklyn Guy: NO BRONX WHAT THE F-CK!?
(The angry customers start climbing up the shelves. Brooklyn panicking sees a catapult on display. He does an epic jump and gets on the catapult that jumps over and he flies over to Bronx)
Brooklyn Guy: GRAHHHHHH!
Bronx Dude: AHHHHH!
(The two get into a scuffle. They look at eachother with menacing glares and grab nearby pipes and start having an epic sword fight. Meanwhile, Human Meggy and Beta Tari is seen running through the chaos carrying a bunch of bags)
Human Meggy: Jesus, who knew a simple day would be so hectic.
Beta Tari: True, lets just hurry up and purchase these items before the building caves in.
(The two continue fighting though they keep blocking eachothers attacks)
Bronx Dude: That’s it… You asked for it. Now I have to do my special attack.
Brooklyn Guy: What’s your special attack?-
Bronx Dude: BRONX RAM!
(Bronx headbuts into Brooklyn sending his pipe flying into a shelf causing it to fall Human Meggy is frozen in fear as the large shelf slowly falls on her)
Beta Tari: HUMAN MEGGY!
(The shelf is about to crush her but Culdee rams through with a shopping cart at full speed catching her too it)
Human Meggy: What the?
Culdee: Oh hey Human Meggy, didn’t know you shopped here too.
Human Meggy: I just came to get gifts for my friends, you?
Culdee: Eh same thing.
Human Meggy: Ah cool.
Culdee: So uhh after this whole mess is over, what do you think about going to the Durr Burger maybe?
Human Meggy: Sure. Could get my mind of whatever the f-ck happened today.
Culdee: Epic.
(SMG4 Mario is seen running around with Spaghetti)
SMG4 Mario: La la la hm hm hm.
(SMG4 Mario sees the cart racing towards him and screams, this causes Culdee to panic and swerve the cart fast causing Human Meggy to fall into a stack of pillows. Culdee passes by)
Culdee: Call me!
(Culdee leaves and Beta Tari walks up witnessing everything)
Beta Tari: … Well that happened.
(Back to Brooklyn and Bronx brooklyn is seen having fallen over and Bronx puts a pipe to his neck)
Bronx Dude: Any last words, Brookie?
Brooklyn Guy: Yeah. BROOKLYN KICK!
(Brooklyn kicks Bronx in the balls)
Bronx Dude: YOW!
(This causes him to trip and fall while holding on to the edge of the scaffolding. He looks down and sees a mob of angry customers below trying to get him, he looks up and horror to see the menacing Brooklyn Guy staring at him)
Bronx Dude: W-WAIT BROOKIE! WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS YO!
Brooklyn Guy: F-CK YOU!
(Brooklyn kicks Bronx in the face, sending him falling in slow motion landing in the pile of angry customers where his fate from there is unknown. A victorious Brooklyn guy walks over to the emergency exit leaving the building. Back at Culdee he is seen still looking around)
Culdee: I still gotta find Trikkiboy’s gift.
(Culdee then sees something offscreen)
Culdee: Yes perfect!
(Culdee races offscreen. He then runs to a cash register)
Culdee: I need to buy all these items please!
Cashier: Sure sir.
(The cashier slowly starts checking out the items. SMG3 is seen fighting over a shopping cart with SMG4)
SMG4: GIVE ME BACK MY SHOPPING CART ,3!
SMG3: Oh sorry did you pay for this stuff?
SMG4: Uhhh no-
SMG3: Than it’s not yours.
SMG4: YOU STUPID SON OF A-
(SMG4 and SMG3 start slapping each other with ends with 3 throwing a bomb that blows up a support beam and the store starts crumbling down)
SMG3: Uh oh.
(Everyone starts running out in a panic as the store slowly crumbles. Culdee sees this and gets in a panic)
Culdee: DUDE CAN YOU SWIPE ANY FASTER?!
Cashier: Chill, I'm swiping as fast as I can.
(Rubble is about to fall on Culdee but the cashier bags all the items)
Cashier: All set.
Culdee: Thanks!
(Culdee races off)
Cashier: Wait you didn’t pay for them yet-
(Culdee throws a bunch of dollars and coins at the cashier and races out of the building as it finally falls into bits)
Culdee: WOO HOOO!
(Culdee races off with his shopping cart full of items as everyone looks appalled at Pen Mart now in shambles)
Buckaroo: Jesus H Christ.
Azaz: That was close.
(Goodman is seen recording a news segment)
Goodman: Now here at the now destroyed Pen Mart which seemed to have fallen to pieces after chaos ensued at the superstore. With only 14 fatalities and 200 injuries, plus millions of dollars made and due, we can safely say this has been another successful Black Friday.
(Karen is seen watching this on the news)
Karen: Oh god, I hope Boinie is alright-
(Karen turns around and sees Brooklyn Guy walking through bruised and dirty)
Karen: Boinie! Thank god! Are you okay?
Brooklyn Guy: I am okay as I am after another day of Black Friday.
(Brooklyn walks off)
Brooklyn Guy: I’m gonna get a beer…
(It cuts to a few weeks later at SML Wiki Headquarters where it is seen snowing)
Trikkiboy: Alright everyone, today Culdee has some gifts for us, so we’re gonna take turns opening them. RH can start first.
RH: Okay!
(RH opens his gift in a box)
RH: Wow, is this an airfryer?
Culdee: Yep, so you can make chicken wings at home!
(Endless looks at his gift which is a poorly wrapped bike)
Endless: Hmm I wonder what this is.
(Endless rips the paper off in one pull)
Endless: GASP! A BIKE!
MarioFan2009: Thanks for the ipod Culdee!
Darthsayain: NO WAY! A FLAT SCREEN TV!
Slugslingee: An Xbox Series X! Gaming is gonna be 1000 times more fun now!
Culdee: And don’t forget your gift Trik!
(Culdee gives Trikki his gift in the shape of a canvas)
Trikkiboy: Oh I didn’t expect one for me.
RH: Well what are you waiting for?
Endless: Open the damn thing already.
(Trikki opens up his gift and brings out a painting of himself and all the other users)
RH: Wow.
MarioFan2009: That’s all of us!
Trikkiboy: Is this?
Culdee: A painting of the greatest team in the world!
Trikkiboy: .. wow. I don’t know what to say. Thanks Culdee.
Culdee: No problem. Glad all that suffering on Black Friday was worth it.
Endless: Wait, you got all of this on a Black Friday?
Culdee: Yep.
Slugslingee: Surprised you came out alive.
Culdee: Well it helps to have a battle plan.
Darthsayain: True.
(The users laugh as it pans out of the SML Wiki Headquarters and SMG3 is seen being chased by an angry mob. The short ends there)
==Trivia==
*This short is made to celebrate Black Friday.