Dr. Seuss on the Loose (321SPONGEBOLT's version)

This isn't much of a rewrite, as all this really is just Thing 5 included with each segment featuring the Cat. However, there will still be some minor fixes.
== OPENING TITLES (Original) ==
NOTE: You don't have to read this if you prefer the Fox Video version down below.
(Screen fades from black showing Cat's hat floating in the middle of a circle in the center of the screen)
Narrator: The Cat in the Hat.
(Cat slides up, with his hat now on his head.)
Cat in the Hat: That's me.
Narrator: Presents...
(Cat slides the title, "DR. SEUSS ON THE LOOSE" up, covering himself.)
"Dr. Seuss on the Loose".
(The circle turns right, showing an orange, a yellow, and a blue disc. The circles tilt and fall over. Cat pops up from behind and realigns the discs. Thing 5 enters from the right of the screen.)
A three-Decker consisting of...
Cat in the Hat: (Raises one finger) One...
(Cat spins the blue disc around, revealing "THE SNEETCHES".)
Narrator: "The Sneetches".
Thing 5: (Raises two fingers) Two... 
(Thing 5 spins the yellow disc around, revealing "THE ZAX".)
Narrator: "The Zax".
Cat in the Hat and Thing 5: (Cat raises three fingers) And three...
(Cat spins the orange disc around, revealing "GREEN EGGS AND HAM".)
Narrator: "Green Eggs and Ham".
(Screen fades to black as the opening score comes to a close)
== OPENING TITLES (1997-1998 Fox VHS version) ==
NOTE: You don't have to read this again if you prefer the opening on top.
(Screen fades from black showing Cat's hat floating in the middle of a circle in the center of the screen)
Narrator: The Cat in the Hat.
(Cat slides up, with his hat now on his head.)
Cat in the Hat: That's me.
Narrator: Presents...
(Cat slides the title, "DR. SEUSS' GREEN EGGS AND HAM AND OTHER STORIES" up, covering himself.)
(On the Dr. Seuss Sing-Along Classics version, the "Sing-Along" logo flies up from the bottom of the screen into place, and flips around as the circle does.)
(After three seconds of silence, the circle turns right, showing an orange, a yellow, and a blue disc. The circles tilt and fall over. Cat pops up from behind and realigns the discs. Thing 5 enters from the right of the screen.)
A three-Decker consisting of...
Cat in the Hat: (Raises one finger) One...
(Cat spins the blue disc around, revealing "THE SNEETCHES".)
Narrator: "The Sneetches".
Thing 5: (Raises two fingers) Two... 
(Thing 5 spins the yellow disc around, revealing "THE ZAX".)
Narrator: "The Zax".
Cat in the Hat and Thing 5: (Cat raises three fingers) And three...
(Cat spins the orange disc around, revealing "GREEN EGGS AND HAM".)
Narrator: "Green Eggs and Ham".
(Screen fades to black as the opening score comes to a close)
== "The Sneetches" Opening Song ==
(Screen fades from black as peaceful music starts playing. The Cat is asleep while floating across the sea on his umbrella. From behind Cat, Thing 5 is shown surfing on his magic wand. As soon as they slide onto the sand, Cat wakes up and gets out of his umbrella.)
Cat in the Hat: ♪Oh, at the edge of each ocean, (Closes his umbrella) you'll always find beaches. Beautiful, glorious, florious beaches.♪
(Camera follows Cat and Thing 5 walking right)
♪When I meander on peaceful-ish beaches, I frequently find myself thinking of...♪
(Cat stops walking and the camera slowly zooms in on Cat's face)
♪Sneetches!♪
(The music starts becoming upbeat)
Chorus: ♪Snee, snee, did you say "Sneetches"?♪
Cat in the Hat: Yes!
(Camera focuses on the tip of Cat's umbrella writing the title in the sand)
Cat in the Hat (Off-screen): ♪S-N-double "E"-T-C-H-E-S, sneetches!♪
(Cat pulls the tip of his umbrella away)
Chorus: ♪Oh, S-N-double "E"-T-C-H-E-S, sneetches!♪♪
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 1) ==
(Screen fades to reveal 6 bird-like creatures known as Sneetches. On their bellies are green stars. The camera follows then Star-Bellied Sneetches marching with their chins up.)
Narrator: Now, the Star-Belly Sneetches had bellies with stars.
(We cut to bunch of sad Sneetches that don't have stars. These are called "Plain-Belly Sneetches". They watch the Star-Belly Sneetches walk past them.)
The Plain-Belly Sneetches had none upon thars. Those stars weren't so big. They were really so small
(The Plain-Belly Sneetches hang their heads and sadly walk left out of the shot)
you might think such a thing wouldn't matter at all.
(Screen cuts to the seashore, where three Star-Belly Sneetches run into the water to swim.)
But because they had stars, all the Star-Belly Sneetches would brag...
(Camera pans right to the three Star-Belly Sneetches swimming)
3 Star-Belly Sneetches: We're the best kind of Sneetch on the beaches!
(We cut to two Star-Belly Sneetches laying under their orange beach umbrellas. One on each side of the beach. A Plain-Belly Sneetch enters from the left of the screen with his own beach umbrella and sets it down in the middle of the screen. The Star-Belly Sneetches decide to stand and leave while closing their umbrellas.)
Narrator: With their snoots in the air, they would sniff and they'd snort...
Star-Belly Sneetch: We'll have nothing to do with the Plain-Belly sort!
(The Star-Belly Sneetches exit left into the next shot, where a young Plain-Belly Sneetch tries to say something, but is neglected by the Star-Belly Sneetches walking past him.)
Narrator: And whenever they met some, when they were out walking, they'd hike right on past them without even talking.
(We cut to a cave. A Star-Belly Sneetch dad instructs his son, Ronald, about what to do about Plain-Belly Sneetches.)
Star-Belly Sneetch Dad: Ronald, remember. When you are out walking, you walk past a Sneetch of that type without talking.
(Camera flies right where the dad is pointing, and the screen zooms in on the same Plain-Belly Sneetch's belly. Then we cut to the Star-Belly Sneetch dad turning his son around.)
Keep your snoot in the air, and continue to snort. We have no truck whatever with the Plain-Belly sort.
(Following his dad's directions, the young Star-Belly Sneetch walks past the young Plain-Belly Sneetch without talking. The young Plain-Belly Sneetch tries to say something again, but is once again neglected.)
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 2) ("Twink Twink, Twinkle Twinkle") ==
(Screen fades to and from black revealing the Sneetches playing catch with a baseball)
Narrator: When the Star-Belly children went out to play ball, could a Plain-Belly get in the game? 
(The ball flies left over the Plain-Belly Sneetch kid's head as he jumps up to catch it) 
Not at all. 
(The ball flies right over the Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid's head as he jumps up to catch it again) 
You only could play if your bellies had stars. And the Plain-Belly children had none upon thars. 
(The ball flies over the Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid as the camera follows them left. He jumps up to catch it, but misses. Then we cut to the two Star-Belly children taunting him.) 
2 Star-Belly Children (Tauntingly): Yar-Yar, your belly's got no star! 
(We cut to the screen following the Plain-Belly Sneetch kid sadly walking right. He walks past four Star-Belly Sneetches singing.) 
Star-Belly Sneetches: ♪Twink twink, twinkle twinkle, lovely little star!♪ 
(Camera zooms in on the Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid as he sings in frustration) 
Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid (Mad): ♪Twink twink, twinkle twinkle, stupid little star!♪ 
Star-Belly Sneetches: ♪If there's one upon your tummy that's just yummy, you're my chummy!♪ 
(We cut to the Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid still walking) 
3 Male Star-Belly Sneetches (Off-screen): ♪If there isn't,♪ 
(The camera stops moving as three Male Star-Belly Sneetches lean to the Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid and points to him in rhythm) 
3 Male Star-Belly Sneetches (On-screen): ♪you're a crummy, slummy, gummy, bummy!♪ 
(The three Male Star-Belly Sneetches pull out of the shot, and the camera continues moving right as the Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid continues sadly walking right.) 
Star-Belly Sneetches (Off-screen): ♪That applies likewise to your daddy and your mommy!♪ 
Star-Belly Sneetches (On-screen): ♪Twink twink, twinkle twinkle, lovely little star!♪ 
(We cut back to the Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid singing in frustration again as he walks right) 
Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid (Mad): ♪Twink twink, twinkle twinkle, stupid little star!♪♪ 
(Screen fades to black) 
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 3) ("A Toast, Raise Your Marshmallow Stick") ==
(Screen fades from black revealing the beach at night. Campfires are set up for the Star-Belly Sneetches to roast marshmallows and hot dogs with their sticks.)
Narrator: When the Star-Belly Sneetches had frankfurter roasts, or picnics, or parties, or marshmallow toasts,
(Camera slowly pans right where the Plain-Belly Sneetches are left standing on the dark side of the beach.)
they never invited the Plain-Belly Sneetches. They left them out cold in the dark of the beaches.
(The camera zooms in on the Plain-Belly Sneetches, then the screen fades to the Star-Belly Sneetches with their sticks with marshmallows on top. As they start singing, they raise their sticks into the air.)
Star-Belly Sneetches: ♪From the heights of Muba Muba,♪
(The Star-Belly Sneetches lower their marshmallow sticks)
♪to the gullies of Gazoo,♪
(The Star-Belly Sneetches raise their marshmallow sticks)
♪there's nobody else who has one.♪
(The Star-Belly Sneetches lower their marshmallow sticks)
♪We're the favorite few who do.♪
(The music crescendos)
♪And... so... a...♪
(We cut to the pointed tips of the sticks with marshmellows being raised each time the word "Toast" is sung)
Star-Belly Sneetches (Off-screen): ♪toast! Raise your marshmallow stick! A toast! Raise your good fellow stick! And toast to the glorious gimmick-ick,♪
(We cut to a Star-Belly Sneetch's belly as he puts his wings on it)
♪that makes us what we are!♪
(We cut to the Sneetches hopping while pointing to the stars on their bellies)
Star-Belly Sneetches (On-screen): ♪Sound off, and let the welcome ring! Give praise for our exclusive thing!♪
(We cut back to the marshmallows being raised each time the word "Toast" is sung)
Star-Belly Sneetches (Off-screen): ♪A toast! Raise your marshmallow stick! A toast! Raise your good fellow stick!♪
(We cut to the Star-Belly Sneetches around the fire as they raise their marshmallow sticks one more time)
♪A toast...♪
(The Star-Belly Sneetches lower their marshmallow sticks)
♪to your belly star!♪♪
(On the last note of the music, the Sneetches chow down on their roasted marshmallows.)
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 4) ==
(As the Star-Belly Sneetches continue eating their roasted marshmallows, the camera pans right.)
Narrator: They kept them away. Never let them come near.
(A Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid enters from the right of the screen with a hot dog on a stick)
And that's how they treated them,
(The Sneetch runs left out of the shot)
year after year.
(The Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid gets sandwiched by two Star-Belly Sneetches' hips. The Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid struggles to pull his hot dog stick back, only to bounce right out of the shot.
They got snob, they got snooted,
(The Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid re-enters the shot, only to be kicked away by a Star-Belly Sneetches foot.)
their bottoms got booted
(The Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid bounces into the next shot from the left of the screen)
while the Star-Belly Sneetches all taunted and hooted...
Star-Belly Sneetch on the right: They just are not suited!
Narrator: And they shouted afar...
(The Plain-Belly Sneetch family hang their heads in sadness and walk right out of the shot)
3 Star-Belly Sneetches (Off-screen): No stars upon thars!
(Screen fades to black. Screen fades from black revealing the beach in the day, as the Plain-Belly Sneetches sit around all sad.)
Narrator: Then one day, it seems while the Plain-Belly Sneetches were moping and doping alone on the beaches, just sitting there wishing their bellies had stars...
(The Plain-Belly Sneetches suddenly hear a car motor getting closer and closer to their location)
a stranger zipped up in the strangest of cars!
(We see the red car with a wagon the driver coming to the screen is Sylvester McMonkey McBean. Unlike in the book where he wears just a green bowler hat and bowtie, the cartoon shows Sylvester wearing a purple bowler hat, a green onesie suit, and a pink bowtie.)
(The camera follows Sylvester driving left until he stops the vehicle and makes an announcement to the Plain-Belly Sneetches)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: My friends...
Narrator: He announced in a voice clear and keen.
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: I see they have been treating you mean. (Takes off his hat) My name is Sylvester McMonkey McBean. (Puts his hat back on) And I've heard of your troubles. I heard you're unhappy. But I can fix that. I'm the Fix-it-Up Chappie. I've come here to help you. I have what you need. And my prices are low, and I work at great speed.
(Camera cuts closer to Sylvester as he pulls out a scroll and unravels it. The document shows Sylvester's guarantee.)
And my work is one hundred percent [100%] guaranteed.
(Sylvester scrolls the document back up and puts it away)
Plain-Belly Sneetches (In awe): Ooh.
(Pulls a lever outside his car, making his driver's seat elevate. The Sneetches watch in amazement and we cut to Sylvester rising up until he's in the middle of the screen. He turns his driver's seat around and makes a red box come out of his trunk.)
Narrator: Then, quickly, Sylvester McMonkey McBean put together a very peculiar machine.
(The red box morphs into the Star-On Machine as the screen fades to the camera pulling away from the finished machine)
And he said...
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: You want stars like a Star-Belly Sneetch?
(Screen cuts to the Snnetches watching attentively)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (Off-screen): My friends, you can have them...
(We cut to the red podium, where the paper reads "PUT A STAR ON YOUR BELLY. $3.00". Sylvester's hand points the cane to the price tag.)
for a mere paltry payment of uh, three dollars [$3.00] each.
Eager Plain-Belly Sneetch: A star? (Points to his belly) Here?
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (Off-screen): Yes, my friend, (Taps his cane on the Sneetch's belly) there!
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (On-screen): And the first to go through gets the trip at half-fare. Just pay me your money, and hop right aboard.
(The Plain-Belly Sneetches hand Sylvester three one-dollar bills as they run across the screen from left to right.)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (While collecting money): Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
(We cut to the entrance to the Star-On Machine. 4 Plain-Belly Sneetches run inside.)
Narrator: So they clambered inside.
(In the next shot, the camera slowly pans right as the Sneetches can be seen zipping up from inside.)
Narrator: Then the big machine roared. And it klonked. And it bonked. And it jerked. And it berked. And it bopped them about.
(The camera stops moving at the end of a tunnel. One by one, the four Plain-Belly Sneetches slide down hitting the sand. They bounce right out of the shot, and the camera pans right as they look at their new star bellies.)
Plain-Belly Sneetch with a Star (Happily): It works!
3 Other Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars (Off-screen, happily): Yeah!
3 Other Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars (On-screen, happily): It works! It works!
Narrator: But the thing really worked! When the Plain-Belly Sneetches popped out, they had stars! They actually did! They had stars upon thars!
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 5) ("We've got Stars up on Thars!") ==
(An upbeat song starts to play as the camera pans right to the confused Star-Belly Sneetches. Then we cut over to five Plain-Belly Sneetches with star bellies who start singing.)
Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars: ♪Them over there, they got stars upon thars! And we over here, we got stars upon ours!♪
(Screen cuts to the Star-Belly Sneetches)
Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars (Off-screen): ♪We got 'em also, we got 'em too.♪
(We cut back to the 5 Plain-Belly Sneetches with stars as the camera slowly pans right across them all)
Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars (On-screen): ♪We're every little bitty bit as goody good as you!♪
(A Plain-Belly Sneetch kid with a star enters from the left of the next shot with a marshmallow on a stick) 
Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars (Off-screen) and Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid with a star: ♪Now we're socially acceptable at marshmallow toasts!♪
(The Sneetch kid runs left into the next shot as he awaits the Plain-Belly Sneetches)
Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars (Off-screen): ♪You'll have to send us invitations to your frankfurter roast!♪
(The Plain-Belly Sneetches with stars march past the kid and the camera follows them marching right)
Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars (On-screen): ♪Stars! Stars! Bless our lucky stars!♪
(The camera stops moving at the sight of the original Star-Belly Sneetches, who watch the Plain-Belly Sneetches with anger, jealousy, and confusion.)
♪All the Sneetches, on the beaches, now got stars upon thars!♪♪
(Screen fades to black)
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 6) ==
(Screen fades from black revealing a red cave. The camera zooms in on the tunnel entrance and two gavel slams are heard as two Star-Belly Sneetches enter from the left of the shot.)
(In the next shot, we cut to inside the cave where Ronald's father holds a meeting among the true Star-Belly Sneetches.)
Star-Belly Sneetch Dad: Ladies and gentlemen, we are faced with the most awkward dilemma! We're the true Star-Bellies! We've had them first! We're still the best Sneetches, (Points to the exit) and they're still the worst!
(We cut to the angry Star-Belly Sneetches yelling in agreement)
Angry Star-Belly Sneetches (In agreement): YEAH!
Angry Star-Belly Sneetch from the crowd: (Stands up and points to the air) But how are we going to prove it? Which is which? I can't tell us apart!
(Just then, Sylvester's bowler hat bounces from behind the crowd left to right across the screen. His "Thank You" is reused.)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (Off-screen): Let me through, excuse me. Step aside, please. Thank you.
(In the next shot, Sylvester arrives at the stand and winks at the crowd of Star-Belly Sneetches)
Narrator: Then up came McBean with a very sly wink. And he said...
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (On-screen): Things are not quite as bad as you think. You don't know me my friends, but calm down if you can. I am here to help the original Star-Belly clan. (Points to the exit) So you don't know who is who, that is perfectly true.
(Screen cuts to the Star-Belly Sneetches confused)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (Off-screen): But come with me friends. Do you know what I'll do?
(Screen cuts back to Sylvester at the stand)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (On-screen): I'll make you again, the best Sneetches on beaches. And all it will cost you is, um... ten dollars [$10] eaches.
(Screen cuts to outside the cave. Sylvester walks out the tunnel, exiting the scene left. The other Star-Belly Sneetches follow him until the screen fades to black.)
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 7) (Original) ==
NOTE: You don't have to read this if you prefer the Fox Video version down below.
(Screen fades from black revealing Sylvester talking to the Star-Belly Sneetches)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Belly stars, my good friends, are no longer in style.
Narrator: Said McBean.
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (Off-screen): What you need is a trip through my (Gestures his hand left) Star-Off Machine.
(Screen cuts to the green Star-Off Machine. The camera slowly pulls away so the viewer can get a good look at it.)
This wondrous contraption will take off your stars,
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (On-screen): So you won't look like Sneetches who have them on thars.
Star-Belly Sneetch Dad (Eagerly): It eradicates (Points to his star belly) these?
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: It eradicates (Points to the Sneetch's star belly) these, with the greatest of ease. (Tightens his bowtie) Provided you pay your ten bucks [$10] if you please.
(The Sneetch's wing hands Sylvester two $10 bills)
Star-Belly Sneetch Dad (Off-screen): Here's ten for the boy and ten for me.
(Sylvester's "Thank You" is reused)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Thank you.
(The Sneetch father and son hold hands as they run left into the green entrance tunnel. Then we cut to Sylvester standing next to the giant paper bag reading "STAR-OFF $10.00". Three Star-Belly Sneetches run across the screen right to left as they pay Sylvester, whose "Thank You" is reused three times.)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
(One by one, two Plain-Belly Sneetches run left into the green entrance tunnel. We cut to the Sneetches' shadows running left into a rainbow patterned tunnel. After the last Sneetch run in, the camera zooms in on his eyes looking down. The final Sneetch zips down and we see him, and two Sneetches sliding left out of the shot. Next, the Sneetches are sitting on top of a conveyor belt going right to left.)
(In the next shot, the camera pans from right to left as the Sneetches stand on platforms going up as down. In the next shot, the convertor belt stops when the Sneetch is in the middle of the frame. The screen flashes revealing the Sneetch's feathers puffed out. The Sneetch blinks twice and water falls on him, making him damp.)
(The belt starts running again, and in the next shot, a shadow of the Sneetch's head moves right to left through four colored windows until his eyes are in the middle of the screen.)
(The eyes spin quickly, and a pink and blue tunnel is revealed as a Sneetch slides away from the camera and down.)
(We cut to outside where three Sneetches slide down diagonally from right to left. In the next shot, the fourth Star-Belly Sneetch bounces into the shot from the right.)
Narrator: And that handy machine, working very precisely, removed all the stars from their tummy quite nicely.
(Camera pans left to reveal four starless Star-Belly Sneetches)
Starless Star-Belly Sneetch #1 (Happily): How original!
Starless Star-Belly Sneetch #2 (Happily): How distinctive!
Starless Star-Belly Sneetch #3 (Happily): How exclusive!
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 7) (1997-1998 Fox VHS version) ==
NOTE: You don't have to read this again if you prefer the original version on top.
(Screen fades from black revealing Sylvester talking to the Star-Belly Sneetches)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Belly stars, my good friends, are no longer in style.
Narrator: Said McBean.
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (Off-screen): What you need is a trip through my (Gestures his hand left) Star-Off Machine.
(Screen cuts to the green Star-Off Machine. The camera slowly pulls away so the viewer can get a good look at it.)
This wondrous contraption will take off your stars,
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (On-screen): So you won't look like Sneetches who have them on thars.
Star-Belly Sneetch Dad (Eagerly): It eradicates (Points to his star belly) these?
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: It eradicates (Points to the Sneetch's star belly) these, with the greatest of ease. (Tightens his bowtie) Provided you pay your ten bucks [$10] if you please.
(The Sneetch's wing hands Sylvester two $10 bills)
Star-Belly Sneetch Dad (Off-screen): Here's ten for the boy and ten for me.
(Sylvester's "Thank You" is reused)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Thank you.
(The Sneetch father and son hold hands as they run left into the green entrance tunnel. Then we cut to Sylvester standing next to the giant paper bag reading "STAR-OFF $10.00". Three Star-Belly Sneetches run across the screen right to left as they pay Sylvester, whose "Thank You" is reused three times.)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
(One by one, two Plain-Belly Sneetches run left into the green entrance tunnel. We cut to the Sneetches' shadows running left into a rainbow patterned tunnel. After the last Sneetch run in, the camera zooms in on his eyes looking down. The final Sneetch zips down and we see him, and two Sneetches sliding left out of the shot. Next, the Sneetches are sitting on top of a conveyor belt going right to left.)
(In the next shot, the camera pans from right to left as the Sneetches stand on platforms going up as down. In the next shot, the convertor belt stops when the Sneetch is in the middle of the frame. The screen flashes revealing a pink and blue tunnel where a Sneetch slides away from the camera and down.)
(We cut to outside where three Sneetches slide down diagonally from right to left. In the next shot, the fourth Star-Belly Sneetch bounces into the shot from the right.)
Narrator: And that handy machine, working very precisely, removed all the stars from their tummy quite nicely.
(Camera pans left to reveal four starless Star-Belly Sneetches)
Starless Star-Belly Sneetch #1 (Happily): How original!
Starless Star-Belly Sneetch #2 (Happily): How distinctive!
Starless Star-Belly Sneetch #3 (Happily): How exclusive!
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 8) ("O-U-T, Out!") ==
(Camera pans left to the confused Plain-Belly Sneetches)
Narrator: Then, with snoots in the air, they paraded about and they opened their beaks and they let out a shot.
(Marching band music starts playing and we cut to the Starless Star-Belly Sneetches marching with their wings behind their backs. The camera follows them marching left.)
Starless Star-Belly Sneetches: ♪Now we know who is who, and there isn't a doubt!♪
(Camera cuts to the Plain-Belly Sneetches with stars as they watch their rivals march across them from right to left)
The best kind of Sneetches are Sneetches without... the old-fashioned custom of walking about.♪
(Camera cuts closer to the Plain-Belly Sneetches with stars as they look at their tummies in disappointment, then turn left.)
Starless Star-Belly Sneetches (Off-screen): ♪The stars on your belly is O-U-T, out!♪
(Camera cuts to the Starless Star-Belly Sneetches marching away from the camera)
Starless Star-Belly Sneetches (On-screen): ♪Abdominal stars we cannot abide.♪
(The Starless Star-Belly Sneetches turn around and march to the camera)
♪Abdominal stars are abominable! Abdominal!♪
(In the next shot, the camera follows the Starless Star-Belly Sneetches marching right)
♪Abominable! Abdominal stars are abominable!♪
Starless Star-Belly Sneetches (Chanting): O-U-T, out! (Raise their wings in the air) O-U-T, out!
(We cut to the Plain-Belly Sneetches standing in confusion)
Starless Star-Belly Sneetches (Off-screen): ♪That old status symbol, is O-U-T...♪♪
(Camera pans left, where on the final note of the song, the Starless Star-Belly Sneetches point to the Plain-Belly Sneetches with Stars while smiling.)
Starless Star-Belly Sneetches (On-screen, on the final note): Out!
(Screen fades to black)
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 9) ==
(Screen fades from black revealing the Sneetches crowding Sylvester McMonkey McBean. If you look close enough, his arms are visible as the camera zooms in on his hands.)
Narrator: Then, of course, those with stars all got frightfully mad. To be wearing a star now was frightfully bad.
(Screen fades to reveal the angry Plain-Belly Sneetches with stars)
Then, of course, old Sylvester McMonkey McBean
(The camera pans left to Sylvester as they run across him as they pay him. Stock footage of the original Star-Belly Sneetches paying Sylvester is reused.)
invited them into his Star-Off Machine.
(Sylvester's "Thank You" is reused two times)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Thank you. Thank you.
(Reusing the same footage as earlier, two Plain-Belly Sneetches run left into the green entrance tunnel. We cut to the Sneetches' shadows running left into a rainbow patterned tunnel. After the last Sneetch run in, the camera zooms in on his eyes looking down. The final Sneetch zips down and we see him, and two Sneetches sliding left out of the shot. Next, the Sneetches are sitting on top of a conveyor belt going right to left.)
(We cut to a pump outside the machine pumping three times until the camera pans left to reveal the Sneetches sliding down the slide)
(The Plain-Belly Sneetches are back to normal, then we cut to the angry Starless Star-Belly Sneetches. They run right and they pay Sylvester while running across the screen. Sylvester now has two paper bags. The red one for the Star-On Machine is on the right, while the green one for the Star-Off Machine is on the left. The screen cuts to the Starless Star-Belly Sneetches running right inside the Star-on Machine entrance.)
Narrator: Then, of course, from THEN on, as you probably guess,
(Screen cuts to the camera panning right across the screen as we see a new route added to the Star-On Machine)
things really got in to a horrible mess.
(The Starless Star-Belly Sneetches slide down a slide and we cut to the end of a tunnel. Footage of the Plain-Belly Sneetches sliding down and hitting the sand is reused. Then we cut back to the outside the Star-Off Machine pumping as footage from that scene is reused.)
All the rest of that day, on those wild screaming beaches, the Fix-it-Up Chappie kept fixing up Sneetches.
(We cut back to reused footage of the Plain-Belly Sneetches sliding down and hitting the sand)
Off again! On again!
(We cut to an outside view of the beach where Sylvester is in the middle, while the Star-Off Machine is on the left and the Star-On Machine is on the right. In an infinity shape, the Sneetches are constantly running in circles.)
In again! Out again! Through the machines they raced round and about again, changing their stars every minute or two. They kept paying money.
(We cut to reused footage of the Sneetches running past Sylvester and the two paper bags while paying him, then we cut to a Star-Belly and a Plain-Belly Sneetch, one of each pair running diagonally to the camera.)
They kept going through until neither the Plain
(Two Sneetches come to a screeching halt as they enter from opposite sides of the screen. The Plain-Belly Sneetch from the left and the Star-Belly Sneetch from the right. The Sneetches face each other confused, not knowing whose side they belong to.)
nor the Star-Bellies knew whether this one was that one, or that one was this one, or which one was what one... or what one was who.
(Screen fades to reused footage of Sylvester rising up until he's in the middle of the screen. He turns his driver's seat around and makes a red tube come out of his trunk.)
Then, when every last cent of their money was spent,
(The tube connects to the Star-On Machine, which morphs back into a crate.)
the Fix-it-Up Chappie packed up, and he went.
(In the next shot, a green tube connects to the top of the Star-Off Machine, which morphs back into a bell-shaped crate. After it is stored back in the trunk, we cut to reused footage of The Sneetches watching in amazement. We cut to Sylvester as he lowers his seat. He takes off his hat and puts it back on, then starts his car as he exits left.)
And he laughed as he drove his car off the beach...
(In the next shot, the camera follows Sylvester driving left.)
Sylvester McMonkey McBean (Cunningly): Ha ha! They never will learn. (Turns his head to the screen and talks to the viewer) No. You can't (Winks) teach a Sneetch.
(In the next shot, Sylvester drives his car down a path and away from the screen.)
Narrator: But McBean was quite wrong.
(The camera pans left to the Sneetches until it stops at a small Plain-Belly Sneetch kid)
I'm quite happy to say that the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day. The day they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches. And no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches.
(The Plain-Belly Sneetch kid turns around during a twinkling sound in the background, and the camera zooms in on his buttcheeks with a star of each of them.)
That day, all the Sneetches forgot about stars.
(The adult Sneetches laugh, and in the final shot, we see two Sneetches shaking wings, forming a truce.)
And whether they had one, or not, upon thars.
== "The Sneetches" Transcript (Part 10)/Ending ("A Toast, Raise Your Marshmallow Stick (Reprise)") ==
(Screen fades to the Star and Plain-Belly Sneetches by a campfire during the afternoon. After the song begins, animations of the Sneetches raising their marshmallow sticks into the air is reused.)
All Sneetches: ♪A... toast! Raise your marshmallow stick!♪
(We cut to the pointed tips of the sticks with marshmellows being raised each time the word "Toast" is sung)
Star-Belly Sneetches (Off-screen): ♪A toast! Raise your good fellow stick!♪
(We cut to the Sneetches raises their marshmellow sticks in the air)
♪A toast to the silly gimmick-ick, that we have here and thar!♪
(We cut to the Sneetches marching left with their marshmellow sticks in the air)
Marching Sneetches: ♪Sound off, and let the welcome ring!♪
(We cut to the Sneetch kid with an adult Sneetch with stars all over his belly)
Plain-Belly Sneetch Kid: ♪So what, to your star-spangled thing?♪
(We cut back to the marshmallows being raised each time the word "Toast" is sung)
All Sneetches: ♪A toast! Raise your marshmallow stick!♪
(We cut back to the reused animation of the marshmallows being raised)
All Sneetches (Off-screen): ♪A toast! Raise your good fellow stick!♪
(We cut to a Plain-Belly Sneetch and a Star-Belly Sneetch with two stars on his belly march in place.)
Two Sneetches: ♪And pooh-pooh-pooh to your belly star!♪♪
(The two Sneetches turn around during the closing instrumental. The Plain-Belly Sneetch is revealed to have a star on his butt as he and his partner march away from the camera. As the song ends, a star-shaped iris closes in the middle of the screen.)
== "The Zax" Opening Song ==
(Screen fades from black showing Thing 5 on a purple mountaintop. As soon as the music stops, Thing 5 makes a telescope magically pop out of his wand and he looks into it while singing)
Thing 5: ♪Beyond the last mountain,♪
(Camera pans right as Cat sings. We see more and more purple mountaintops.)
Thing 5 (Off-screen): ♪the very last mountain...♪
(Screen fades to reveal red mountains with trees on them as the camera continues flying right)
♪Beyond the last Zinica Zanica dream.♪
(Screen fades to reveal green hills with trees that have red leaves on top as the camera continues flying right)
♪Beyond the last whoomph bush, the very last whoomph bush, there is a vaculess vacant prairie.♪
(The screen fades to a patch of light green grass. The camera pans right.)
♪The prairie of Prax, and the tale... of... the...♪
(Camera stops moving and the title fades in)
♪Zax.♪♪
(Screen fades to black)
== "The Zax" Transcript (Original) ==
NOTE: You don't have to read this if you prefer the Fox Video version down below.
(Screen fades from black revealing The North-Going Zax walking up a hill. Then camera follows him walking left.)
Narrator: One day, making tracks in the prarie of Prax came a North-Going Zax.
(Screen flies right to reveal a South-Going Zax. The camera follows him walking left.)
And a South-Going Zax.
(Screen cuts back to the North-Going Zax as the camera follows him walking left)
A North-Going Zax,
(Screen cuts back to the South-Going Zax as the camera follows him walking right)
and a South-Going Zax.
(Screen cut to the middle where the Zax walk into each other)
And it happened that both of them came to a place where they...
(The Zax bump into each other. A bump sound plays right on cue as they bump each other.)
bumped! There they stood. Foot to foot. Face to face.
(The camera zooms in on them below and the screen fades to a closer shot of the two Zax as they begin to quarrel)
North-Going Zax (Mad): Look here now!
Narrator: The North-Going Zax said.
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the angry South-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the North-Going Zax yells at him)
North-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): I say!
North-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): You are blocking my path. You are right in my way.
North-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): I'm a North-Going Zax and I always go north.
North-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): (Points away) Get out of my way, now, and let me go forth!
South-Going Zax (Mad): Who's in whose way?
Narrator: Snapped the South-Going Zax.
South-Going Zax (Mad): I always go South making south-going tracks.
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the now angry North-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the South-Going Zax yells at him)
South-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): So you're in MY way!
South-Going Zax (Mad): (Points away) And I ask you to move and let me go south in my south-going groove.
Narrator: Then, the North-Going Zax puffed his chest up with pride.
North-Going Zax (Mad): I never,
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the angry South-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the North-Going Zax yells at him)
Narrator: He said,
North-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): Take a step to one side.
North-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): (Points to the South-Going Zax) And I'll prove to you that I won't change my ways (Closes his eyes) if I have to keep standing here fifty-nine [59] days.
South-Going Zax (Mad): (Points to the North-Going Zax) And I'll prove to YOU,
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the angry North-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the South-Going Zax yells at him)
Narrator: Yelled the South-Going Zax,
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the North-Going Zax with his eyes closed)
South-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): That I can stand here in the prarie of Prax for fifty-nine [59] years!
(The North-Going Zax's eyes open and we cut back to the two Zax)
South-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): For I live by a rule that I learned as a boy back in South-Going School.
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the angry North-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the South-Going Zax yells at him)
South-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): "Never budge!", that's my rule. "Never budge in the least!"
South-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): "Not an inch to the west, not and inch to the east!". I'll stay here, not budging! I can and I will if it makes you and me and the whole world stand still!
(The Zax fold their arms and close their eyes. The screen fades to an outer shot of them. The screen behind them fades to sunset, then night, with their bodies as shadows. Crickets can be heard chirping for a few seconds until the background fades to sunrise, with the Zax visible again.)
(The background fades back to daytime and the screen fades back to a closer look at the Zax standing pridefully with their arms folded and their eyes closed. Suddenly, a gust of wind blows at their fur, and background behind them fades to a stormy sky as autumn leaves, a paper, and some tree branches fly past them. The sky flashes white on the thunderclap as a paper flies into the South-Going Zax's face.)
(The screen cuts to the stormy sky where there are black clouds flashing during the thunderclaps. The clouds pour rain on top of the Zax, dampening their fur coats. After it stops raining, the screen fades to snow flying around the Zax, until they both get buried in snow.)
(Screen fades to the Zax standing in the middle of Spring. A yellow bird flies across the screen in both directions and the screen fades to the Zax as cars can be heard honking in the background.)
(The camera pulls away revealing a highway, with the Zax standing under a bridge with a sign saying "ZAX BY PASS".)
Narrator: Well... of course, the world didn't stand still. The world grew. In a couple of years, the new highway came through. And they built it right over those two stubborn Zax. And left them there, standing unbudged in their tracks.
(Screen stops pulling away, revealing the whole city and highway. The screen eventually fades to black.)
== "The Zax" Transcript (1997-1998 Fox VHS version) ==
NOTE: You don't have to read this if you prefer the opening on top.
(Screen fades from black revealing The North-Going Zax walking up a hill. Then camera follows him walking left.)
Narrator: One day, making tracks in the prarie of Prax came a North-Going Zax.
(Screen flies right to reveal a South-Going Zax. The camera follows him walking left.)
And a South-Going Zax.
(Screen cuts back to the North-Going Zax as the camera follows him walking left)
A North-Going Zax,
(Screen cuts back to the South-Going Zax as the camera follows him walking right)
and a South-Going Zax.
(Screen cut to the middle where the Zax walk into each other)
And it happened that both of them came to a place where they...
(The Zax bump into each other. A bump sound plays right on cue as they bump each other.)
bumped! There they stood. Foot to foot. Face to face.
(The camera zooms in on them below and the screen fades to a closer shot of the two Zax as they begin to quarrel)
North-Going Zax (Mad): Look here now!
Narrator: The North-Going Zax said.
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the angry South-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the North-Going Zax yells at him)
North-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): I say!
North-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): You are blocking my path. You are right in my way.
North-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): I'm a North-Going Zax and I always go north.
North-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): (Points away) Get out of my way, now, and let me go forth!
South-Going Zax (Mad): Who's in whose way?
Narrator: Snapped the South-Going Zax.
South-Going Zax (Mad): I always go South making south-going tracks.
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the now angry North-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the South-Going Zax yells at him)
South-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): So you're in MY way!
South-Going Zax (Mad): (Points away) And I ask you to move and let me go south in my south-going groove.
Narrator: Then, the North-Going Zax puffed his chest up with pride.
North-Going Zax (Mad): I never,
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the angry South-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the North-Going Zax yells at him)
Narrator: He said,
North-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): Take a step to one side.
North-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): (Points to the South-Going Zax) And I'll prove to you that I won't change my ways (Closes his eyes) if I have to keep standing here fifty-nine [59] days.
South-Going Zax (Mad): (Points to the North-Going Zax) And I'll prove to YOU,
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the angry North-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the South-Going Zax yells at him)
Narrator: Yelled the South-Going Zax,
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the North-Going Zax with his eyes closed)
South-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): That I can stand here in the prarie of Prax for fifty-nine [59] years!
(The North-Going Zax's eyes open and we cut back to the two Zax)
South-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): For I live by a rule that I learned as a boy back in South-Going School.
(Screen cuts to a close-up of the angry North-Going Zax and back to the two Zax as the South-Going Zax yells at him)
South-Going Zax (Mad) (Off-screen): "Never budge!", that's my rule. "Never budge in the least!"
South-Going Zax (Mad) (On-screen): "Not an inch to the west, not and inch to the east!". I'll stay here, not budging! I can and I will if it makes you and me and the whole world stand still!
(The Zax fold their arms and close their eyes. The screen fades to an outer shot of them. The screen cuts to the stormy sky where there are black clouds flashing during the thunderclaps. The clouds pour rain on top of the Zax, dampening their fur coats. After it stops raining, the screen fades to snow flying around the Zax, until they both get buried in snow.)
(Screen fades to the Zax standing in the middle of Spring. A yellow bird flies across the screen in both directions and the screen fades to the Zax as cars can be heard honking in the background.)
(The camera pulls away revealing a highway, with the Zax standing under a bridge with a sign saying "ZAX BY PASS".)
Narrator: Well... of course, the world didn't stand still. The world grew. In a couple of years, the new highway came through. And they built it right over those two stubborn Zax. And left them there, standing unbudged in their tracks.
(Screen stops pulling away, revealing the whole city and highway. The screen eventually fades to black.)
== "Green Eggs and Ham" Opening Song ==
(Screen fades from black revealing The Cat and Thing 5 in front of a yellow background)
Thing 5: And now, ladies and gentlemen, our grand finale! We...
♪frequently think every now and then of a glorious fruit from the noble hen.♪
(Thing 5 takes his hat off and reveals an egg)
Eggs!
(Cat pulls an egg from behind his back)
Cat in the Hat: Eggs!
(Cat pulls another egg from behind his back with his other hand)
Cat in the Hat and Thing 5: E-double "G"-S, eggs!
(Thing 5 puts his egg on his wand and balances it on his nose)
Thing 5: ♪Our knowledge of eggs is tremendously wide.♪
Cat in the Hat: ♪I've eaten them boiled, I've eaten them fried.♪
(Cat and Thing 5 walk around and the camera slowly moves left. Thing 5 tosses his egg to Cat, who juggles both eggs. Thing 5 dances sideways while raising and lowering his wand with both hands.)
Thing 5: ♪Poached, and shirred, and deviled, and scrambled.♪
Cat in the Hat: ♪Omelets, schmomelets, coddled, and frambled.♪
(Camera stops moving and Cat throws the eggs on top of Thing 5's wand. Thing 5 does his egg-balancing act again.)
♪We've eaten, and beaten, and swizzled, and swuzzled, frizzled, gadizzled, bamboozled, and fuzzled.♪
(Thing 5 bumps the eggs up and Thing 5 catches one egg. Cat catches the other egg with his tail and he tosses it back to Cat's hands.)
Thing 5: We know every way that an egg can be guzzled!
Cat in the Hat: ♪And thinking of eggs...♪ 
Thing 5: ♪Reminds us of Sam-I-Am!♪
Cat in the Hat and Thing 5: ♪Whose favorite dish...
(Cat and Thing 5 high five each other with their eggs, breaking them open.)
♪is...♪♪
(The eggs drop onto a plate, then a green ham with a fork on it appears on cue.)
Cat in the Hat and Thing 5 (Off-screen): Green Eggs and Ham!
(Screen fades to black as the music ends)
== "Green Eggs and Ham" Transcript ==
(Screen fades from black, revealing a tall yellow Who a reading a newspaper. His hat is purple for this cartoon, while in the original book, his hat is black. He puts down the newspaper as he hears a dog barking. Camera pans left to a doorway.)
(A small Who with a white head and a yellow body is standing on top of a brown dog as the camera follows him right. The small Who has a sign saying "I AM SAM", this is his name. Sam's voice is similar to Dick Dastardly from "Wacky Races".)
Sam-I-Am: (Takes off his hat) I am Sam!
(The camera stops following Sam as soon as the dog runs through the doorway on the right. The screen cuts to the guy, who watches Sam come back.)
(Sam is now standing on top of a pink tiger with purple stripes. The camera follows him left as Sam holds up a sign revealing his full name.)
Sam-I-Am!
(The camera stops following Sam as soon as the tiger runs through the doorway on the left, then we cut to the guy ranting about Sam-I-Am. Guy's voice sounds identical to Tigger from "Winnie the Pooh".)
Grouchy Guy (Mad): That Sam-I-Am, that Sam-I-Am, I do not like that Sam-I-Am.
(As Grouchy Guy continues where he left off in his newspaper, Sam-I-Am rises up from behind Guy's chair with a platter of two sunny-side up eggs with green yolk and a whole green ham with fork stuck to it.)
Sam-I-Am: Do you like green eggs and ham?
Grouchy Guy (Mad): (Stands up in annoyance) I do not like them, Sam-I-Am. (Exits right) I do not like green eggs and ham.
(In the next shot, the camera follows Guy walking outside. It should be noted here that on the Fox Video versions, Guy's fur is white for the rest of the segment. Thankfully, all home media releases starting with the 2003 Universal Studios VHS/DVD release restore the color of Guy's fur back to yellow.)
Chorus: ♪He does not like them, Sam-I-Am. He doesn't like, he doesn't like green eggs and ham.♪
(Guy stops walking as Sam opens a trapdoor from underneath, surprising Guy.)
Sam-I-Am: Would you like them (Points to the ground) here?
(Sam-I-Am pulls out a gadget. He presses the button with his thumb, making a white Cat in the Hat glove spring out and tiptoe on its fingers until it stops and points in another spot of grass.)
Sam-I-Am (Off-screen): Or there?
Grouchy Guy (Mad): I would not like them (Points to the ground) here... (Runs left to the gloved hand pointing to another patch of grass) or there. I would not like them anywhere.
(We cut to Sam watching Guy's torso walk past him)
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (Off-screen): I do not like green eggs and ham. I do not like them, Sam-I-Am.
(Screen cuts to the camera following Guy walking right. Guy's walking animation is reused as he approaches a house.)
Chorus: ♪He doesn't like green eggs and ham.♪
(Guy opens the door)
Chorus: ♪He doesn't like them...♪
(The chorus stops singing as we cut to Sam inside the house on the left of a table)
Sam-I-Am: Would you like them in a house?
(A gray mouse bounces onto a chair on the other side of the table. The mouse has a napkin tied around his neck.)
Would you like them with a mouse?
Grouchy Guy (Mad): I do not like them in a house!
(Guy slams the door and exits left. In the next shot, he runs away from the camera until he turns around and yells at the screen.)
I do not like them with a mouse! I do not like them here or there, I do not like them anywhere! I do not like green eggs and ham! I do not like them, Sam-I-Am!
(Guy runs down a hill until he can't be seen anymore, then the screen fades to him walking again, with Guy's walking animation reused.)
Chorus: ♪Green eggs and ham! He doesn't like green eggs and ham! He doesn't like them, he doesn't like green eggs and ham!♪
(During a slide whistle and crash on the final note of the music, Sam-I-Am comes down while riding a red wooden crate with a brown fox. The crate has a rope attached on top of it.)
Sam-I-Am: Would you eat them in a box? Would you eat them with a fox?
Grouchy Guy (Mad): (Growls and shakes his head and he pulls away) No! Not in a box, not with a fox!
(A trumpeting fanfare goes off and the fox barks in alarm. The fox runs right out of the shot. Then, white hunting dogs bark while running across the screen from left to right and leaving a trail of smoke. Behind the dogs are two horses with two unseen men riding on top of them, only the humans' boots are visible. As soon as the clouds settle, we cut back to Guy ranting.)
Not in a house, not with a mouse! I would not eat them here or there, I would not eat them anywhere!
(Sam's hands offer Guy the platter of green eggs and ham. The same "Yuck!" sound Tigger makes is reused for Guy.)
Yuck! I would not eat green eggs and ham! I do not like them, Sam-I-Am!
(Guy exits left, and in the next shot, the camera follows Guy now walking left until Sam's blue car hits him, and Guy is showing sitting on the hood of the car.)
Sam-I-Am: Would you? Could you? In a car? Eat them! Eat them!
Sam-I-Am (Off-screen): Here they are! (Offers the platter again)
Grouchy Guy (Mad): (Pushes the platter away) I would not, could not, in a car!
(The car drives past the screen from right to left, bouncing over a hill. Then the car drives left to right across the screen. The screen cuts to Guy holding onto his hat as he sees something coming up.)
(The camera, from Guy's POV zooms in on the tree at the edge of the cliff. Fortunately, the car gets stuck at the very top of the tree. Meanwhile, the truck bends down due to the weight of the car on top of it.)
Sam-I-Am: You may like them, you will see. You may like them in a tree!
Grouchy Guy (Mad): I would not, could not in a tree! Not in a car! You let me be!
(Guy suddenly sees a train driving below him at the bottom of the cliff. He jumps off the car and lands on the caboose.)
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (Calling up to Sam): I do not like them in a box! I do not like them with a fox! I do not like them in a house! I do not like them with a mouse!
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (Calling up to Sam off-screen): I do not like them here or there! I do not like them anywhere!
(Sam-I-Am looks at Guy from far away and gets a determined look as we cut back to Guy's voice trailing off as he continues yelling at the viewer.)
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (Calling up to Sam on-screen): I do not like green eggs and ham! I do not like them, Sam-I-Am!
(Screen shows a few shots of the train as the chorus sings)
Chorus: ♪Sam, oh Sam, oh Sam-I-Am!♪
♪He doesn't want them, doesn't need them, wouldn't touch them, wouldn't eat them here or there!♪
♪Or any, any, any, any, any, any, any, anywhere! Anywhere! Anywhere!♪
(Screen fades to inside the train. We see Guy smiling as he sits as a table reading a menu. Much to his shock, Sam-I-Am arrives on the other side of the table with his plate of green eggs and ham.)
Sam-I-Am: Could you, would you, on a train?
Grouchy Guy (Mad): (Growls and shakes his head and he pulls away) No! Not on a train, not in a tree! Not in a car! (Stands up and exits left) Sam, let me be!
(In the next shot, Guy walks up to a door and puts his hand on the doorknob.)
I would not, could not in a box! I could not, would not with a fox!
(Guy opens the door and the same hunting fanfare plays as the fox runs out the door. The animations of the hunting dogs and horses running with clouds underneath is reused. As soon as the clouds settle, the camera cuts closer to Guy as he continues shouting.)
I will not eat them with a mouse, I will not eat them in a house! I will not eat them here or there, I will not eat them anywhere! I do not eat green eggs and ham! I do not like them, Sam-I-Am!
(Guy enters the doorway and closes the door. Guy enters from the right of the next shot and sits in a seat by one of the two windows. The train enters a stone tunnel, and the screen fades to black. Sam and Guy's eyes remain visible.)
Sam-I-Am (Off-screen, eyes visible): Psst! In the dark? Here in the dark! Would you, could you in the dark?
(Guy's eyes form into angry eyes as he growls)
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (Off-screen, eyes visible): I would not, could not, in the dark!
(Guy's eyes bounce right until we cut to the end of the tunnel. Guy comes out of the tunnel while pumping a handcar and the camera follows him right. A few seconds later, a thunderclap plays in the background as it starts raining. While Guy is getting rained on, Sam slides in from behind Guy with an umbrella under the green eggs and ham. Sam offers the plate to Guy as it continues raining.)
Sam-I-Am: Would you, could you, in the rain?
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (While pumping his handcar): (Pushes the plate away) I would not, could not in the rain! (Points up to the sky) Not in the dark, not in a train! (Continues pumping) Not in a car, not in a tree! I do not like them, Sam, you see! Not in a house, not in a box! Not with a mouse, not with a fox! I will not eat them here or there! I do not like them anywhere!
(Screen cuts to Sam)
Sam-I-Am: You do not like green eggs and ham?
(Screen cuts back to Guy)
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (While pumping his handcar): I do not like them, Sam-I-Am!
(Guy exits right and in the next shot, the camera pans to a rocky hill as Guy rides his minecart away from the screen until his shadow exits right.)
(Screen fades to Guy not getting rained on anymore as he continues pumping his handcar. He suddenly sees the crossing gate come down as an alarm goes off. Guy pulls the lever, making his handcar come to a screeching halt as he gets closer to the screen.)
(The same hunting fanfare plays as the fox runs across the screen from left to right. The animations of the hunting dogs and horses running with clouds underneath is reused. As soon as the clouds settle, Guy heards a goat bleating and turns to the screen. The next shot reveals Sam standing on top of a white billy goat eating grass. The goat in standing on the track.)
Sam-I-Am: Would you, could you, with a goat?
Grouchy Guy (Mad): (Growls) I would not, could not, with a goat!
(We cut to Sam and the goat frowning. The goat backs up as the gate opens, allowing Guy to continue pumping his handcar. Guy exits left, and in the next shot, Guy drives the handcar to the screen. In the next shot, the camera follows Guy pumping his handcar right. Guy flies off the track, and the camera keeps panning right until it stops at a yellow steamboat. Guy lands in the steamhole and a puff of gray smoke comes out upon landing.)
(Screen fades to the trapdoor. Guy comes out from underneath, with his hat now bent back. Guy looks both ways to see if the coast is clear and he dusts himself off as he exits left. In the next shot, Guy makes it to the edge of the boat and is shocked to see Sam-I-Am. The next shot shows Sam standing on a canoe from below the ship.)
Sam-I-Am: Would you, could you, on a boat?
Grouchy Guy (Crying): (Grabs his hat) No-ho-ho-ho-ho!
Grouchy Guy (Mad): (Inhales) I could not, would not, on a boat! (Slams his fists onto the edge of the boat) I will not, will not with a goat!
(Screen cuts to Sam-I-Am)
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (Off-screen): I will not eat them in the rain!
(Screen cuts back to Guy ranting)
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (On-screen): I will not eat them on a train!
(Before Guy could continue, a train whistle interrupt him, and Guy starts to become scared.)
(Screen cuts to the train going down, then in the next shot, the train flies off the track. We cut to Guy cowering on deck.)
Grouchy Guy (Suddenly scared): I do not like green eggs and ham!
(Screen cuts to the boat, and the train lands in the steamhole and sinks the boat with a big splash. We cut to Guy and Sam underwater.)
Grouchy Guy (Mad) (Water gargling): I do not like them, Sam-I-Am!
(Guy gasps for air and swims up from underwater and the screen follows him swimming left until he walks on-shore)
Grouchy Guy (Exhausted): Whew.
(Guy takes his hat off, making the water inside it splash his entire head. He puts his hat back on and continues walking left until he sees a treasure chest. Excited to have found gold and jewels, he opens the chest, only for Sam-I-Am and his plate of green eggs and ham to pop out.)
Sam-I-Am: You do not like them. So you say. Try them, try them and you may. Try them and you may, I say.
(Sam hands Guy the plate and Guy shakes his head in defeat)
Grouchy Guy (Defeated): Sam, if you will let me be, I will try them. And you will see.
(Guy picks the fork off the ham and scoops up an egg. Guy covers his eyes with his other hand and Guy eats the egg. Guy suddenly starts to grow a smile while eating and he starts doing Tigger's laugh.)
Grouchy Guy (Happily): Mmm! Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! (His ears curls and uncurl) Oh, say!
(Guy eats a piece of the ham and eats the other egg)
Grouchy Guy (Happily) (Off-screen): I like green eggs and ham!
Grouchy Guy (Happily) (On-screen): I do, I like them Sam-I-Am!
(Sam smiles and Guy starts dancing with the plate in his hand)
Grouchy Guy (Happily) (Off-screen): ♪And I will eat them on a boat!♪
Grouchy Guy (Happily) (On-screen): ♪And I will eat them with a goat!♪
♪And I will eat them in the rain, and in the dark, and on a train!♪
♪And in a car, and in a tree! They are so good, so good, you see!♪
(Guy wraps his arm around Sam and continues dancing)
♪So I will eat them in a box, and I will eat them with a fox!♪
(The same hunting bugle plays as we cut to the fox running to the screen from over a hill. The hunting dogs follow the fox. In the next shot, the camera follows the fox running right until he stops and stands on his hind legs while singing.)
Fox: ♪He will eat them in a box! And he will eat them with a fox!♪
Fox and Hunting Dogs: ♪And he will eat them in a house!♪
(The mouse from earlier runs in from the left and sings with the fox and dogs)
Fox, Hunting Dogs, and Mouse: ♪And he will eat them with a mouse! And he will eat them...♪
(Screen cuts to Sam and Guy smiling happily as the animals the rest of Guy's song)
Fox, Hunting Dogs, and Mouse (Off-screen): ♪here and there!♪
(Screen cuts back to the fox, mouse, and dog finishing the song.)
Fox, Hunting Dogs, and Mouse (On-screen): ♪Say, he will eat them... anywhere!♪♪
(After the final note, we cut back to Guy talking to his new friend, Sam.)
Grouchy Guy (Happily): I do so like green eggs and ham!
(Camera slowly pulls away from Guy and Sam)
Thank you! Thank you, Sam-I-Am!
(Screen fades to black)
== END CREDITS/CLOSING LOGOS ==
(Screen fades from black as a musical rendition of "Green Eggs and Ham" starts playing)
=== ORIGINAL CREDITS ===
ANIMATION:
JON GIBBS
BOB MATZ
BOB RICHARDSON
DICK THOMPSON
DON WILLIAMS
FRED MADISON
JOHN FREEMAN
BOB BRANSFORD
BOB BEMILLER
VOICES:
ALLAN SHERMAN: THE CAT IN THE HAT
HANS CONRIED: NARRATOR/NORTH-GOING ZAX/SOUTH-GOING ZAX
PAUL WINCHELL: SNEETCHES/GROUCHY GUY/SAM-I-AM
BOB HOLT: SNEETCHES/SYLVESTER MCMONKEY MCBEAN
BACKGROUNDS:
RICHARD H. THOMAS
CAMERA:
JOHN BURTON JR.
LARRY HOGAN
RAY LEE
FILM EDITING:
ALLAN POTTER
JOE SIRACUSA
RICK STEWARD
IN CHARGE OF PRODUCTION:
LEE GUNTHER
MUSIC BY:
DEAN ELLIOT
TELEPLAY AND LYRICS BY:
DR SEUSS
STORYBOARD BY:
BOB RICHARDSON
PRODUCTION DESIGN BY:
MAURICE NOBLE
DIRECTED BY:
HAWLEY PRATT
PRODUCED BY:
FRIZ FRELENG
AND
TED GEISEL
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER:
DAVID H. DePATIE
=== ADDITIONAL CREDITS ===
SOUND WORK:
ORIGINAL SOUND EFFECTS BY PRODUCERS' SOUND SERVICE INC.
ADDITIONAL SOUND EFFECTS ADDED BY 321SPONGEBOLT
THING 5 CREATED BY 321SPONGEBOLT
(The circle with Cat's hat fades in the middle of the screen. The animation of Cat sliding up is reused, and the circle fades away to reveal the white DePatie-Freleng Films logo. The screen fades to black after the final note of the end credits music.)
THE END
Category:321SPONGEBOLT
Category:The Cat in the Hat
Category:Rewrites
Category:Transcripts
Category:Cartoon Shows
Category:TV Specials