Bilb Gimp

== Portlandish Bilborian Gimpoid ==
Bilb Gimp was a mentally ill deranged-sex chronically online cyclist Bloodhound-Humash Hybrid residing primarily in Scotland, and, post-Final Moment, in Portland Oregon. 
Bilb Gimp, born in Wopplegrove McNuttsville in Scotland, and ran a rotten Instagram page from 2 AB to 999,999 AB under the tag '@bilbgimp'. This page was Grand. In 2 AB, Bilb Gimp was employed for a time at G-Man Alpha's Fried Chicken Venture on Garraxia but tried to boil Ice and Shoes 2 hours into his first shift and started a fire which eventually was exploited and used by the Garraxian Hypotherians to combust the whole of the chain, resulting in the end of the Fried Chicken on Garraxia.This resulted in a permanent grudge of G-Man Timefracture Alpha against Bilb Gimp. 
== Portlandish Accident ==
While supercycling through the dunes of Earth-remnant rock Astero Pacifica, Bilb Gimp accidentally coasted into the realm of Portland Oregon in 999,995 AB, Within this fiery walls, Bilb Gimp adopted the guise of 'Bilb Gimp' for the first time. Now Bilb Gimp, Bilb Gimp was trapped under a smoldering Portlandish parking garage and melted into the ground, remaining in that state for the next four years. During this time, he crawled excruciatingly toward the edge of the Portlandium, moving at a pace of 1 nanometer per second. 
== Portlandish Escape ==
By 999999 AB his nose had finally reached the firmament, when he noticed a shadow moving beyond. Moahtia-motsip-fishslurp IVX, a Ghetsinian Fruiterer, had planted a garden on the exterior of Portland Oregon. Among this garden was a watermelon; this melon would turn out to be very Artistically Relevant. Bilb Gimp watched as Moahtia-motsip-fishslurp IVX leaned down to cut the melon. Viewing this beauty, and nearly escaped from his Portlandish Years of Purgatory, Bilb Gimp pulled his JF Sweetphone out and used his final 1% battery to record and upload this watermelon cutting. However, a Nasty Serpent Emerged, . and sted the infamous, world-renowned video 'See The Last Surprise', which garnered nearly 10 views. This video was artistically commended and celebrated and earned Bilb Gimp a Hodgepodge Portlandish Goldspoink Award for Greatness thrice. 
== Portlandish Purgatory ==
Unfortunately for Bilb Gimp, just as he had posted the Last Surprise video and was about to escape the Portlandish Firmament, the Omniverse fucking ended. Thus, he turned around and sighed, resting his back against a crumpled up red Acura, and began to cry, watching the stars fizzle out and the Outervoid consume all that he had once known. Bilb Gimp was one of very few non-naturally-Portlandish individuals to survive the Final Moment. 
== Portlandish Politics and the Two-Winged Angel ==
Luckily for Bilb Gimp, as a reward for his grandness in posting the Last Surprise Video, the Eye of Sauron bequeathed upon him a grandiose, feathered, wrought-iron Hell Angel Body, which Bilb Gimp's essence was soul-tethered to immediately. Hence, Bilb Gimp became known as the 'Two-Winged Angel'. In the absence of the Omniverse's existence, Portland became nearly the only remaining realm of the Rick Hernia Omniverse, and thus, experienced an immediate power vacuum. The Eye of Sauron, once 19,542,356,424,456,345th in line for the King of Gods, was immediately promoted to this position (as the Auditor recused himself due to feelings of 'guilt' and 'belligerence', the Author vanished, and Chraunor locked himself in the Court of Time and never emerged again). 
Due to this Strange Development, Sauron became the king of the Gods, and Bilb Gimp became his second in command; thus, Bilb Gimp became Vice God Emperor of Portland Oregon and, by extension, the Omniverse. His duties as Vice Emperor included Social Media Management. 
== Portlandish Communicationiumoidiumoidiumoidiumoidiumoidium ==
Bilb Gimp, in 1,000,001 AB, cloned himself 800,000,000 times and assigned each clone to operate an Instagram Page in the various fractal realities which followed the Omniverse's existence, sending decoded messages through cryptic, color-shifted images and videos which told the tragic story of the Rick Hernia Omniverse and warned of what may come to pass. Bilb Gimp Clone 321,240 was assigned to Reality 12, and continues to post in your timefracture. 
Category:Characters
Category:Gods