The Official Hand Book to Chuck Norris

The Official Handbook to Chuck Norris is a book about Chuck Norris.
== Facts about Chuck Norris ==
* Chuck Norris is extremley dangerous
* Chuck Norris ordered Burger King fries at McDonald's AND HE GOT THEM
* Chuck Norris won Minecraft
* Chuck Norris stepped on Doug the Scorpion
* When Chuck Norris wants butter, he roundhouse kicks the cow, and out comes butter
* When Chuck Norris wants bacon, he roundhouse kicks the pig, and it lays bacon
* when Chuck Norris wants eggs, he roundhouse kicks the chicken and it lays eggs
* When Chuck Norris wants Cadbury Chocolate Eggs, he roundhouse kicks the rabbit and it lays cadbury eggs
* People wanted to add Chuck Norris to mount Rushmore, but the granite wasen't tough enough for it
* Chuck Norris died, but he's alright now
* There used to be a street called Chuck Norris, but they changed it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives
* Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, but Death hasen't built up the courage to tell him
* Chuck Norris was been to Mars, and thats why there are no signs of life
* The fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
* Some magitians can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land
* Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter
* Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, He scares the sh*t out of it
* Chuck Norris can slam a revolting door
* Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin, its decendants are known today as giraffes
* Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together
* There is no theory of eveloution, its just a list of animals Chuck Norris lets live
* Chuck Norris dosen't were a watch, HE DECIDES WHAT TIME IT IS
* The origanal title for Alien Vs Predator was Alien Vs Predator Vs Chuck Norris but it was changed because nobody would go see a movie that was 14 seconds long
* Chuck Norris once smashed a miror over a black cats head under a latter, and won the lottery
* They once made Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem, it wouldn't take sh*t from anyone
* Chuck Norris once won a starring contest with Medusa
* Chuck Norris can punch a cyclops between the eye
* When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways
* The only way to defeat Chuck Norris is to eteled sih egap
* Chuck Norris stepped on a LEGO brick. It felt good. 
* Senpai notices Chuck Norris all the time. 
Chuck Norris knows you're reading this...
Category:Books
Category:Chuck Norris approved