Philly's Battery-Powered Fart Machine

As seen on Comedy Time, this is a battery-operated, farting yellow noise button that lights up orange and talks; after every fart is a wisecrack from Philly Phil (as voiced by Brandon O'Dell.)
== The Slapstick Routines ==
These are to be used by pranksters to make others giggle instantly.
* Running Cramp-Lie down on a soft surface and ask someone to lift your ankle due to running cramp; when they do, secretly activate your Battery-Powered Fart Machine and lip-sync whatever wisecrack follows your pretend fart.
* Height Testing-Find a friend or family member, tell them that you are doing height testing and line up back-to-back; when your tush gets tickled, secretly activate your Battery-Powered Fart Machine and lip-sync whatever wisecrack follows your pretend fart.
== The Farts and Phrases ==
# ("leathery lingerer" fart) TBA
# ("Butt Bugle" fart) TBA
# ("Piff-Puff" fart) TBA
# ("Superstretcher" fart) That reached the outer limits!
# ("Cabbage squealer" fart) That'll remind you to eat your greens!
# ("Crybaby" fart) TBA
# ("Methane meltdown" fart) TBA
# ("Windy whiner" fart) TBA
# ("Whinger" fart) TBA
# ("Bee buzzer" fart) TBA
# ("Furious Hornet" fart) That one had a real sting to it!
# ("Electricity buzzer" fart) TBA
# ("Yellowjacket buzzer" fart) TBA
# ("Kickin' Ripper" fart) I got a kick outta that!
# ("Rockin' Razzer" fart) TBA
# ("Wasp buzzer" fart) TBA
# ("Floorboard curler" fart) TBA
# ("Paint peeler" fart) TBA
# ("wallpaper peeler" fart) TBA
# ("Heiney howler" fart) TBA
# ("Butt balloon popper" fart) TBA
# ("Heiney explosion" fart) TBA
# ("Le Sigh du Versailles" fart) Ah, the distinct bouquet of flatulence!