Single-Celled Lynnfense/transcript

Previous Episode: Stella, Help Us! (Season 16)
Next Episode: White Buff for Puff
== Transcript ==
Episode Aired: November 4, 2023
Episode Copyrighted: 2023
This episode is rated TV-Y7.
The episode opens with Plankton exiting Master Lox's Lair.
Plankton: *kicks door open, grunts* All right, Karen. I'm off to go shopping. *whistles*
A pink fish steps on him.
Plankton: Oh!
Bubble Bass: *sees Plankton, but doesn't know that the latter's squished* Ew! I seem to have stepped revolting substance! No matter! *walks to the cash register anyway while dragging Plankton*
Pink fish: *lifts up my foot* Uh... ew! What is that?
Plankton: *groans*
A fish rubs him on a rock.
Plankton: Ahh! Ahh!
A fish walks away.
Plankton: *groans*
Slide transition to Plankton walking down a street, next to an alley.
Plankton: *grumbles*
A shady-looking fish comes out of the alley.
Shady Salesman: Psst!
Plankton: Huh?
Shady Salesman: Hey, over here.
Plankton: *walks next to him, avoids eye contact* So, uh, you got the goods?
Shady Salesman: Of course. *opens coat, revealing some weapons* I always deliver.
He hands a small ray gun to Plankton.
Plankton: Hee-hee. *takes gun* Eee! *hands over the bag*
The salesman takes it with tweezers.
Shady Salesman: *inspects money with eye scope and tweezers* Pleasure doing business with you.
Plankton: Likewise, my shady friend. So same time next-- *gets stepped on, yelps*
Slide transition to the Krusty Krab. Customers are inside eating Krabby Patties.
Lord Master Lox: *enters the restaurant* I'm here!
Plankton: *weakly enters the restaurant, groans, waves gun* I'm here for the formula.
Lord Master Lox: Good.
Plankton: *wobbles* Hand it over, and nobody gets-- *gets stepped on by Bubble Bass, groans*
Bubble Bass: *stretches Plankton* Ew. I seem to have stepped in some revolting substance. No matter. *continues walking, dragging Plankton along the ground*
Plankton: *weakly* Ouch. Ouch.
Slide transition cuts to the Chum Bucket.
Plankton: *crawls under the door, revealing a foot-shaped imprint on my back* *groans* Honey, I'm home.
Karen Plankton: *comes in and picks up Plankton with a brush and dustpan* Tough day at work, dear?
Plankton: *folds arms* Yes. Everybody stepped on me again.
Karen Plankton: *shows sad face* Oh. *extends hand from my head* Well, I know what'll cheer up my little man. *shows a small disco outfit on a hanger* Let's dance those blues away.
Plankton: Oh, boy!
Screen cuts to the outside of a dance club shaped like a disco ball. An airhorn blares. Inside, Karen, in a red dress, and Plankton, in his disco outfit, are dancing.
Karen Plankton: Oh, yeah! Go, Sheldon. Ha-ha!
Plankton: You were right, Karen, *wiggles arms* I feel better already! *jumps* I've got *strikes pose* boogie fever!
A shoe stomps on him, he groans.
Karen Plankton: We haven't...
Plankton: *gets squished by a waltzing couple*
Karen Plankton: ...danced like this since our wedding night.
An orange fish jumping and dancing squashes Plankton.
Orange Fish: Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Whoo!
A conga line of fish pass by and step on Plankton. When they leave, he is nowhere to be seen.
Karen Plankton: *looks at the floor* Plankton? *shows worried face* Oh, no. *goes to two fish* Pardon me. Pardon me. *lifts their feet* Plankton? *picks up Scooter's foot* Plankton, are you there, sweetie? Excuse me.
Scooter the Fish: *falls on my butt* Ohh!
A fish is breakdancing with Plankton's eye near his feet.
Karen Plankton: *grabs his leg and looks at it* Plankton? *grunts* There you are. *takes his eye* Huh. At least part of you.
Plankton’s eyeball forms a mouth.
Plankton: That's it! I'm not getting stepped on anymore! Take me to my lab!
Karen Plankton: Sure... *quick laughs* But let's find the rest of you first.
Slide transition cuts to Master Lox's Lair.
Lord Master Lox: I don't get it, Pearl! Plankton got stepped on!
Pearl Master Lox: He'll be fine, Master Lox. He is small and weak.
Lord Master Lox: Plankton. I have to go to his lab.
Slide transition cuts to the Chum Bucket.
Plankton: *hammers something twice, puts on a mask and blowtorches it, throws it away and causes an explosion, and laughs*
Lord Master Lox: Hey Plankton.
Plankton: I'm testing, Master Lox.
He puts on a spiked helmet. He jumps onto an X mark painted under a metal boot.
Plankton: Foot Deterrent, Version 1.1, commence test.
The boot stomps Plankton.
Lord Master Lox: Ooh.
Plankton: *groans* Not quite there.
Time card reading "Many Versions Later"
French Narrator: Many versions later...
Plankton: *stands on the X with a laser attached to my helmet* Foot Deterrent, laser thingy. *sighs* Might as well get this over with.
Lord Master Lox: Now fire the laser, Plankton.
Plankton: Oh right.
The foot stomps him. A laser blasts through the toe of the foot. It lifts up. The laser smokes, and Plankton is stunned.
Plankton: What? Yes! We're invincible!
Lord Master Lox: We sure are!
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: *loses balance* Ohh-ohh-ohh-ohh. *falls on our backs* Ah!
Laser blasts, slicing the Chum Bucket in half, and the hand falls.
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: Ow.
Slide transition cuts to Fred walking down the street, whistling.
Plankton: *jumps out of an alley*
Master Lox and Plankton are wearing their laser helmets.
Plankton: *grunts*
Lord Master Lox: All right Plankton, time for a field test in T-minus 3, 2, 1. *fires the laser*
Fred Rechid: *steps on Plankton* Huh?
A laser comes out and blasts a hole in Fred's foot. He looks down at Plankton.
Lord Master Lox: *laughs*
Fred Rechid: My foot! *grabs it, falls over, and scoots away on my back* Ouch. Ouch. Ouch.
Plankton: *cackles*
Lord Master Lox: Take that, you high-stepping ham! Huh?
Sandy Cheeks and Lynn Loud Jr.: *approaches from the other direction*
Lynn Loud Jr.: *whistles*
Plankton: Oh, boy.
Lord Master Lox: Time to stop those big metal stompers.
Sandy Cheeks and Lynn Loud Jr.: *stops in place*
The camera shows a dramatic close-up of her eyes.
Sandy Cheeks: *jumps around and skillfully dodges Master Lox's lasers*
She kicks him into the air.
Sandy Cheeks: Hiyah!
Lynn Loud Jr.: Master Lox! Plankton!
Plankton: *lands on my back* Oh!
The laser blasts into the air and evaporates a flower cloud.
Sandy Cheeks: *scolds* Master Lox, what in tarnation are you doing? You almost barbecued my *points to my foot* dang paw!
Lord Master Lox: Duh. That was the point. *interested* But hey, what was that *mimes karate* "hiyah" stuff you just did?
Sandy Cheeks: Well, that was just good, old-fashioned *does karate chops* self-defense. You know, *throws board into the air and kicks it* ka-ra-tay. *kneels down* Looks like you could use a little self-defense too. *points behind me* Why don't you swing by my dome so I can *does karate moves* show you some moves?
Plankton: Anything to stop the stomping!
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: *takes off their helmets*
Lynn Loud Jr.: *spits on my right hand, then offers it* Shake hands, guys!
Lord Master Lox: You got yourself a deal, Lynn! *shakes Sandy's hand*
Plankton: Ugh! *shakes Lynn's finger*
A laser goes off. Fred, on a gurney, is being taken into an ambulance. The laser blasts through his other foot.
Fred Rechid: *looks at foot* Huh? *weary sighs*
Slide transition cuts to a zen garden area outside Sandy's dome. Sandy is wearing a gi over her suit.
Lynn Loud Jr.: *calls* All right, guys, come on out.
Plankton: Mmm. *comes out in a yellow gi* I make *spins and poses* this gi look good. *jumps next to Sandy*
Sandy Cheeks: Now bow to your sensei.
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: Master Lox and Plankton bow to no one! Huh?
Lynn Loud Jr.: *tilts Plankton forward with my finger*
Sandy Cheeks: Hiyah.
Lynn Loud Jr.: Good. Now we may begin. We must first gauge your current level of self-defense.
Sandy Cheeks: Kar-ate! *shows a giant shoe on my tail* Think fast!
Plankton: Think wha--? *gets stomped* Ouch!
Lord Master Lox: Now I know why they call it a sneaker.
Sandy Cheeks: Maybe something *takes out flip-flop* a little gentler.
Plankton: *gets hit twice* Whoa! I can't flip like you. Only flop!
Lord Master Lox: *gets hit like Plankton did* Ouch!
Lynn Loud Jr.: OK. *takes out bunny slippers* How 'bout these?
She stomps Plankton three times, the last one getting foam in his mouth.
Sandy Cheeks: Huh. Seems like you lack the fundamentals.
Lynn Loud Jr.: Yeah yeah.
Sandy Cheeks and Lynn Loud Jr.: *leans forward*
Lynn Loud Jr.: What you need is some *raises hand* basic training.
Plankton: *spits out foam* Okey-dokey, sport girl.
Shoes fall down the screen as a transition.
Sandy Cheeks: *pulls on Plankton's antenna to make him do karate chops*
She puts him next to a flipper slipper.
Plankton: Hyah, hyah, hyah, hyah, hyah! *hands swell and crack to pieces* Ow.
Screen cuts to Lynn stomping on Plankton several times.
Plankton: OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW! *screams* AAAAHHHHHHHH!
Screen cuts to Sandy polishing a shoe, which gleams.
Lord Master Lox: *tries to polish mine, but falls off the shoe and onto my face, then grunts*
Screen cuts to Plankton yelling while karate chopping the flipper slippers.
Plankton: Aaaah!
Sandy Cheeks: *puts my shoes into a ball launching machine*
Plankton: *jumps out of the way to dodge one, then grunts* Ha-ha! *gets hit by another shoe* Augh!
Screen cuts to Master Lox polishing a shoe.
Lord Master Lox: Heh-heh-heh.
Screen cuts to Plankton in front of a flipper slipper.
Plankton: Hiyah! *chops it into logs* Hee-hee. *shines a shoe*
His reflection bows to him. Screen cuts to Lynn meditating and posing on top of a mountain of shoes.
Lynn Loud Jr.: *hums*
Sandy Cheeks: *ties a shoelace and hums*
Plankton: *does the same atop a shoelace amd hums*
Lord Master Lox: *does the same tying shoelace and hums*
Shoes fall down the screen, transitioning back to Sandy's zen garden. Sandy is holding a box of baby shoes.
Sandy Cheeks: Now that you've mastered the basics, I reckon you're ready to spar with a *shows box* real partner.
SpongeBob SquarePants and Lincoln Loud: *comes out of the box* Hi, Plankton!
Plankton: *uneasy* SpongeBob? Lincoln?
SpongeBob SquarePants: Go right ahead, Lincoln.
Lincoln Loud: *walks to Plankton* Don't worry. I'll go easy on ya. *points to my red foam boots* Foam sparring boots.
Plankton: *punches my fist, wearing brass knuckles* I can't promise I'll do the same.
Sandy Cheeks: Bow to your opponents.
Lincoln Loud and Plankton: *bows to each other*
Sandy Cheeks: *rings cowbell* Now fight!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, I can't watch! *cover my eyes*
Lord Master Lox: Plankton, what are you waiting for?! Get him!
Plankton: *tries to fight Master Lox*
Lord Master Lox: Not me! Lincoln!
Lincoln Loud: *poses* Yaaaa!
Plankton: *scared* Huh?
Lincoln Loud: *jumps with my foot out* Yah!
Plankton: *screams, runs away, but gets crushed by the boots and groans*
Lincoln Loud: *lifts boots* That was pretty good, Plankton. *holds out finger* But remember to keep your guard up.
Plankton: It's no use. I'm just too small to avoid being *puts fist in hand* stepped on.
Lord Master Lox: Plankton, what are you doing?! You're supposed to fight him!
Sandy Cheeks: *strokes chin* Hmm. But in karate, your greatest weakness *clasps hands* may also be *flexes* your greatest strength.
Plankton: Yeah. But in "rea-li-tay," that doesn't make any sense!
Lord Master Lox: *growls* PLANKTON!
Lynn Loud Jr.: Allow me to demonstrate.
Lincoln Loud: *zooms in*
Lynn Loud Jr.: SpongeBob, give me the old roundhouse.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Wah! *spins around and kicks*
Sandy Cheeks: Your opponent's *grabs SpongeBob's foot* momentum can be used–
Lincoln Loud: Huh?
Sandy Cheeks: *slams SpongeBob onto Plankton*
He comes apart.
Sandy Cheeks: –against them, no matter your size. You OK, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob SquarePants: *in pieces* I would bow to you. If I could. Ouch.
Plankton: *comes out of SpongeBob's hole* That was incredible! *takes a stance* Let me try!
Lynn Loud Jr.: *points to my head* Visualize the technique. *does motions* Grab, twist, *mimes throwing* and let gravity do the rest.
Lord Master Lox: Shut up! You're distracting him!
The background goes dark.
Plankton: *inhales deeply*
He gains a white outline. He exhales. Sandy's white silhouette is seen moving towards Plankton.
Sandy Cheeks: Hwah!
Plankton: *catches Sandy's foot*
The background snaps back to normal.
Plankton: Hiyah! *swings Sandy onto Lincoln*
Lincoln Loud: Ouch.
Lynn Loud Jr.: *yelps* Ugh!
Plankton: I did it! In your face, feet!
The gong resounds.
Lynn Loud Jr.: *stands up and smashes my fists together, then bows* Congratulations, Plankton. But remember, this technique is to be used *points* strictly for self-defense.
Plankton: Oh, of course, Sensei Lynn. *leans in* Uh, wink? *takes off gi* Buh-bye! *laughs*
Lord Master Lox: Wait up, Plankton! *runs to Plankton*
Sandy Cheeks and Lynn Loud Jr.: *stares ahead with a blank expression*
Lincoln Loud: Uh, Sandy?
It zooms out to show Sandy and Lynn standing on them.
Lincoln Loud: Could you give us a ride to the hospital?
Lynn Loud Jr.: Whoops! *steps off them* Oh, sure, SpongeBob and Lincoln. Heh-heh.
Screen cuts to Master Lox and Plankton walking down the street.
Lord Master Lox: All right, who's...
The fight bell rings.
Lord Master Lox: ...looking to rumble? Huh? You!
Bubble Bass is walking down the street, drinking a cup of soda.
Plankton: *cracks knuckles* Heh-heh.
Bubble Bass: *steps on him*
Plankton: Hiyah!
Lord Master Lox: Plankton, I got this! Hiyah! *swings Bubble Bass into the air and throws him face-down into his soda*
Bubble Bass: *groans* What unexplained *grabs crushed soda cup* force of nature? *sobs*
Lord Master Lox: *looks at my hands* I feel so powerful!
The elephant trumpeting sound is heard.
Lord Master Lox: And I can't help but use that power for evil!
Plankton: That's the spirit!
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: *cackles*
Slide transition cuts to the Krusty Krab.
Plankton: *jumps outside* Oh, Krabsy? *punches door open* Hyah! I'm home!
Old Man Walker is carrying a plate with a Krabby Patty.
Plankton: *throws him into a table*
Sandals the Fish: *walks by*
Plankton: *throws him into a support beam*
A woman gets tripped by Plankton and her plate of Krabby Patties spills on her.
Lord Master Lox: *cackles* You're doing it, Plankton.
Plankton: No one can stop me now. *grabs customer's foot* That secret formula will be mine!
He flips the customer upside down.
Customer: Whoa, whoa! Ugh!
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: *cackles*
Customer: Master Lox? Plankton?
Anchovy: No, not Master Lox and Plankton!
Everyone screams and runs away.
Squidward, reading a magazine, grasps for a rope. He pulls it and an alarm flashes.
Plankton: *jumps in front of Krabs' office* We made it, Master Lox. *looks behind me and Master Lox*
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: Huh?
A ninja swings down from a post. Another pops out of a trash can, and a third comes out of a drink cup. They flip in between Master Lox and Plankton.
Lord Master Lox: Security ninjas? Heh. Mr. Krabs thinks of everything.
Plankton: *poses* Bring it on!
The orange ninja takes out spiked heels, while the green one takes out shoe nunchucks.
Plankton: *makes a beckoning gesture*
Green Ninja: Whaaa! *swings nunchucks*
Plankton: Yah! *throws him away, dodges the spiked heels, and throws another ninja away* Yah! *dodges a sharp shoe, looks up, and sees a purple ninja fanning some more shoes*
He catches the shoe and throws it back at the ninja, who jumps away. The ninja throws a smoke bomb, obscuring the three ninjas, who reveal themselves with spiky cleats. The camera closes in on Plankton, who squints and growls. He beats up the three ninjas and throws them into Krabs' office, where they disappear in a cloud of smoke.
Plankton: Knock, knock!
Mr. Krabs: *cowers behind desk* Plankton! How did you get past me security ninjas?
Plankton: With the art of karate. *looks at hands* Now that I can defend myself, *points at Mr. Krabs* your feet are all doomed!
Lord Master Lox: You're doomed, Mr. Krabs! Doomed! Doomed I tell you!
Mr. Krabs: *laughs* Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
Plankton: *shakes fist* Oh, you won't be laughing once I use my *poses* ultimate foot-stomping finisher! *accordion music*
Mr. Krabs: *walks up to Master Lox and Plankton* Bad news for you, Master Lox and Plankton. I don't have any feet.
Lord Master Lox and Plankton: You what?
Close-up of Krabs' stubby legs. The left one has barnacles and the right is covered in bandages. A foghorn blares.
Plankton: Just my luck, I guess. *gets stomped and groans*
Mr. Krabs: Hee-hee! The old familiar sting of *lifts foot, to Plankton* "de-feet," aye? *laughs, then hardly punches Master Lox*
Lord Master Lox: OUCH!
Bubble transition to the hospital. Master Lox and Plankton, heavily bandaged and with a crutch, walks out.
Plankton: *sighs* Six to eight weeks before I can attack the Krusty Krab again. Oh, well. At least I'm not in traction anymore.
Lord Master Lox: My arms are hurting! *bone cracks in pain* Ouch!
A wheelchair wheel rolls over him.
Plankton: Augh!
Sandy is pushing a bandaged SpongeBob and Lincoln in wheelchairs.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, boy! Only six to eight weeks before I can work at the Krusty Krab again!
Lincoln Loud: I can't wait!
Sandy Cheeks and Lynn Loud Jr. *pushes them forward*
Plankton: Ouch! Ka-ra-tay is a pain in the--
A close up of Ashley’s foot.
Ashley Roberts: *steps on Plankton*
Plankton: Ouch!
Ashley Roberts: Whoops. Sorry, Plankton. I didn't mean to step on you.
Plankton: *groans*
Screen cuts in black and it says "THE END". Episode ends.
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