Hoopla Dies

This is the 34th episode of Hoopla's Fantastic Beach, and the 6th episode of season 3.
== Transcript ==
(Continuing from the last episode, Hoopla enters the “death” dimension)
Hoopla: (falls onto the ground) Oof! That felt like an entire year. Oh well, at least I didn’t die. So...a death dimension. This can’t be too bad. I can handle some skulls and a few blood drops.
(Hoopla takes a look at his surroundings and sees a dimension that looks just like his, but darker)
Hoopla: (sniffing) I smell depression, what’s going on? Maybe someone around can tell me what’s going on.
(Hoopla walks a few blocks and notices a depressed looking Carl)
Hoopla: Hey Carl, how’s it going?
Carl: Don’t… ask… 
Hoopla: Why is everyone around here so bummed out? Maybe…(gasp) THIS IS A WORLD WITHOUT CHEERIOS!
(This episode is sponsored by Cheerios)
Carl: No, Cheerios are still around…
Hoopla: Dang it. So it can’t be that. Maybe my parents are around somewhere.
(Hoopla enters his typical apartment and goes up to his floor. He knocks on “his” parents’ door, and two depressed-looking Hoopla parents answer it)
Zoopla: Zoopla… who are you again?
Hoopla: I’m your stupid son.
Zoopla: We already have a stupid son, right over there.
(An alternate dimension Hoopla is seen slowly eating Cheerios on the table nearby)
Hoopla: Well, can you explain what’s going on here? Why is everyone so down? Why is the sky so dark? And why isn’t anyone doing anything about it?
Woopla: Son-we-don’t-have, the government’s lazier than Neptune. It’s run by a golf ball. That’s also his name.
Hoopla: You’re kidding right?
Woopla: Nope, he’s a literal golf ball. And his associates.
Hoopla: This golf ball guy sounds familiar. I think I’m gonna go talk to him.
Zoopla: Well, uh, you do that. We’ll just wait here for the suffering to end.
Alternate dimension Hoopla: The only solution is endless suffering…
Hoopla: This guy creeps me out. But I think I know just the way to cheer him up.
(Hoopla spins around and suddenly is wearing hip-hop clothes)
Hoopla: Yo! Wassup Diggity Dogs! 
(The other Hoopla has no change of expression)
Hoopla: Darn. I have one more idea.
(Hoopla puts on an astronaut helmet)
Hoopla: What you know about rolling down in the deep when your brain gets numb you can call that mental freeze when these people talk too much put that I can’t say that here yeah I feel like an astronaut in the ocean.
Alternate dimension Hoopla: I have no idea what that means. Frankly, I hate it.
Hoopla: *gasp* HE HATES IT! THIS IS TERRIFYING!
Woopla: You should see him on Mondays.
Hoopla: Okay, that’s it. I’m marching straight into this stupid golf ball’s government, and there’s nothing anybody can do to stop me!
Government building guard: I’m gonna have to stop you.
Hoopla: Die.
Government building guard: Oh no, you’ll die soon enough. Just not at this moment.
Hoopla: Wait wut
Government building guard: Speaking of, I see someone that looks exactly like you about to get crushed by a house. Good for him.
Hoopla: WHAT
(Alternate dimension Hoopla is seen walking towards a bridge, as a house is falling from the sky)
Hoopla: YOU IDIOT, MOVE!
Government building guard: lol
Hoopla: LOOKS LIKE I’LL HAVE TO SAVE THE DAY!
Alternate dimension Hoopla: Not like you can do anything about it…
Hoopla: Oh yes I can, I’ve died many times to a house like this so I know its patterns. Thankfully I had the ability to recover. I’m pretty sure you don’t. Besides, this is like the lamest way to die.
(The house is about to crush alternate dimension Hoopla when it suddenly stops)
House: Oh, this is too boring? Sorry, I thought being crushed by a house was enough damage. What do you want me to do? Stuff myself full of TNT?
Hoopla: Uh, yeah. Exactly. That would be more exciting.
Alternate dimension Hoopla: I agree.
House: Oh...okay. (The house is now full of TNT) This is gonna be one explosive death!
Hoopla: RUN OUT OF THE WAY!
Alternate dimension Hoopla: Meh. (falls face-flat)
House: ME GONNA GO BOOM!
Hoopla: (facepalms)
(The house explodes, causing the entire bridge to collapse.)
Hoopla: (falling) Well, I would usually be scared by this, but after all the dimensions I’ve gone to, honestly, I’m not surprised this is happening.
(Hoopla lands in a bush)
Hoopla: Ow. Oh man, what happened to alternate dimension Hoopla?
(He sees alternate dimension Hoopla’s body)
Hoopla: OH GOD! HE’S DEAD! JUST WHAT THE TITLE OF THE EPISODE SAID! Now I hate the person who came up with that title.
Alternate dimension Hoopla: (cough) Nope...still alive.
Hoopla: Well I guess if I can survive from falling then you can survive an explosion. I really thought you were dead though.
(Suddenly, a government vehicle pulls up, and runs over alternate dimension Hoopla. Now he’s really dead. Out of the car comes Squilliam.)
Squilliam: Ha! That’s what you get for swallowing Squidward’s mega chair! Me and my web brigade will be celebrating!
Hoopla: What.
(An alternate version of Jasper walks up)
Jasper: As it was my request for Hoopla to die, I said he would be killed by Squilliam after eating Squidward’s mega chair, which Squidward once owned that Squilliam stole. But then after this “Hoopla” ate it, Squilliam was unable to get it back so he called for revenge on this Hoopla.
Hoopla: This...what...huh?
Jasper: Just go look on the idea corner, alright?
(Everyone leaves Hoopla.)
Hoopla: What a lousy dimension. I need to have a little talk with the government here.
(Hoopla chases after the government vehicle and follows it all the way to a secret government building)
Hoopla: Wow they really didn’t bother to protect the perimeter huh.
(The government vehicle parks in a reserved parking space, and Hoopla hides behind a sad-looking bush)
Hoopla: Wow, even the bushes are depressed.
(The government agent steps out of the car and walks into the building, scanning his fingerprint. Hoopla quickly gets out of the bush and follows him in when the door opens)
Government agent: I sense a disturbance in the force. I’m sure it’s nothing.
(Hoopla keeps following the government agent’s footsteps until he enters a secret government room)
Hoopla: Ooh, secret room!
Government agent: AHA! I knew someone was sneaking up behind me! (he picks up Hoopla)
Hoopla: PUT ME DOWN YOU LITTLE P-
???: Put the little gremlin down, if you would.
(The agent sets down Hoopla)
Hoopla: Who exactly are you?
???: My name is Golf Ball.
Hoopla: I should’ve known. Oh who am I kidding.
Golf Ball: What is it that you want? You’re stepping on precious seconds of productivity here.
Hoopla: Productivity… (he figures out why Golf Ball is familiar to him) Oh yeah! You’re like that one guy from my dimension who nobody likes!
Golf Ball: Excuse me?
Hoopla: Yeah. And I know your secret weapon.
Golf Ball: No you do not.
Hoopla: Try me. (he puts on the hip-hop outfit again) Yo! Wassup Diggity Dogs! I just made a mess in the other room!
Golf Ball: (covering his ears) Stop that this instant!
Hoopla: High five! Huh? Don’t be hatin’. Oh yeah, gotta do part two now. WHAT YOU KNOW ABOUT ROLLING DOWN IN THE-
(Golf Ball starts cracking while screaming, and the other government agents pick up Hoopla as they pin him to the ground)
Golf Ball: THE MUSIC! THE FORCE! I CANNOT TAKE IT!
Government agent: Sir, are you ok?
Golf Ball: Yes..yes, I just need to regain my sense of balance. Keep him pinned to the ground. He says he’s from “another dimension”. Perhaps he could be of use. Analyze his molecules.
Hoopla: Oh no you don’t! I got more up my sleeves!
(The government agents put duct tape on his mouth)
Golf Ball: No you don’t.
(The government agents put a syringe inside Hoopla’s arm and pull blood out.)
Golf Ball: Analyze his brain matter, too.
Government agent: Sir, you’re not gonna believe what’s in this blood.
Government agent 2: It’s also taking over his brain!
(Golf Ball looks at the data.)
Golf Ball: The shadow.
Hoopla: (spits duct tape off mouth) What?
Golf Ball: We use very peaceful tactics to find out information. (punches Hoopla) WHERE DID YOU GET THIS SUBSTANCE?! (punch) WHY IS IT INSIDE YOU? (punch) WHERE ARE YOU FROM?
Hoopla: Shadow...you mean like the Shadow Monster? That one monster that was on that one island? And there was like...a button, or something? For some reason, my memory is going blank. Whatever you mean, it just doesn’t make sense.
Golf Ball: (backing away) The shadow is taking over you at an alarming rate. The Shadow Monster, opposite of King Neptune, destroyer of the 3rd dimension...if it fully takes over you, all worlds are doomed.
Hoopla: You’re lying. The shadow monster is gone, I’m pretty sure I defeated it. And even if it is still alive, inside me, somehow, I don’t think some shadows inside me is gonna destroy everything. The insides of our bodies are always dark!
Golf Ball: Agents, let him go. We cannot let him roam around in this world.
(They kick Hoopla out)
Hoopla: YOU'RE A TERRIBLE DICTATOR!
Golf Ball: How dare you call me a dictator, I am simply a president who's term is lasting somewhat longer than usual.
(Hoopla walks away.)
Hoopla: Well that’s a bit...worrying. It's probably...probably nothing.
(Bloxyl appears)
Bloxyl: Hey Hoopla, did you fix this dimension?
Hoopla: Um...sure.
Bloxyl: Alright, the next dimension is my favorite. It’s truly magical.
Hoopla: Just...get it over with.
Bloxyl: Ok, see you soon!
Hoopla: Oh and Bloxyl, I have to tell you something important that happened here.
Bloxyl: Yeah?
Hoopla: It’s, uh, umm…(pause) THAT ALTERNATE DIMENSION ME REALLY LIKES SWALLOWING MEGA CHAIRS! OKAY BYE! 
(Hoopla swiftly jumps into the portal as the episode ends.)
==Trivia==
*This is the first episode to premiere after a long hiatus.
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