Transcript:The Worthiest Knight, Pt. 2

ACT TWO:
 EXT. Armstrungard - Late Afternoon
 REGAN
 The Well-Groomed Lemming. College pub. Hate to say it
 but there’s a good chance Nia woulda come here.
 NARRATOR
 Brennen and Regan were surveying the scene of a recent
 fire in Armstrungard, in search of their missing
 companions. A glint of light reflected from a pile of
 ashes. Brennen reached for the source, and came up with
 a gilded arrowhead. One side was engraved with the
 Guernatal sigil; the other with the mark of the Elven
 High Council.
 BRENNEN
 Yllowyyn. They did come this way.
 NARRATOR
 Without warning, Brennen grabbed a random pedestrian by
 the cloak, nearly pulling her off her feet with his
 intensity.
 BRENNEN
 What’s happened here?
 TOWNSWOMAN
 Lemming burnt down.
 REGAN
 Gee thanks we can--
 (CATCHES HERSELF)
 Fucking guard?
 TOWNSWOMAN
 Nah. I dunno what happened, wasn’t guard though.
 REGAN
 Everyone get out?
 TOWNSWOMAN
 Fucked if I know.
 BRENNEN
 Well what else can you tell us?
 TOWNSWOMAN
 Look, I got my own shit to worry about. What do you
 think I am? A supporting player in your life story?
 NARRATOR
 With a parting rude gesture, the woman disappeared back
 into the crowd.
 REGAN
 (TO BRENNEN)
 They were here, then the place burned down. Wasn’t city
 guard, but there’s no coincidences in this city.
 So...what the fuck happened here?
 BRENNEN
 Perhaps the night went something like this...
 BRENNEN
 (V.O.)
 IMAGINING - INT. Well-Groomed Lemming, Late Morning
 The tavern was filled with students discussing...
 studently matters.
 REGAN (V.O.) Right. Sure.
 MAN
 My studies are about how House Guernatal is the
 greatest and most righteous of the Great Houses.
 BRENNEN
 (V.O.)
 ...said one of the students, obviously trying to
 impress a young lady.
 WOMAN
 I agree, but tell me more.
 BRENNEN
 (V.O.)
 That’s when the Kalth’yr and the others entered.
 NELSON
 I read a story like this.
 BILLY
 Silence, you less-of-a-man-than-I.
 JEN
 Hehehe how clever you are, Billy.
 BRENNEN
 (V.O.) Then, some student deep in his cups attempted to court young Jen.
 MAN
 How is it that I’ve never before gazed upon your
 beauty?
 BILLY
 I respect myself so little that minor insults require
 mortal combat! Have at you!
 BRENNEN
 (V.O.)
 Billy lunges at the man, knocks some candles onto the
 sawdust on the floor, and there you have it.
 SOUND: FIRE STARTING AND PANIC
 SMASH CUT TO: EXT. Ruins of the Lemming - Late Afternoon
 REGAN
 No, no, no. I know this town. If some kid no one ever
 saw before got in a fight and burnt down the Lemming,
 it’d be all these people could talk about.
 BRENNEN
 Let’s see if we can get closer.
 NARRATOR
 The pair dug through the ashes for a few more minutes.
 They received some odd looks from the owners of the
 tavern, who could not understand why two strangers were
 searching the remnants of their livelihood, but they
 were kind (or frightened) enough not to mention it.
 After a moment, Regan identified a spot that appeared
 even more charred than the rest of the wreckage.
 REGAN
 I’m guessing it started here.
 BRENNEN
 Do you remember what this used to be?
 REGAN
 Girl’s room I think. Here’s what happened...
 IMAGINING - INT. Well-Groomed Lemming, Late Morning
 REGAN (V.O.) Studently matters, right?
 MAN
 Uh...book learning, book learning, book learning.
 WOMAN
 Oooh, I’m so impressed. You wanna congress me? Is that
 how rich people say it? Congress me really hard against
 the wall out back.
 REGAN (V.O.)
 Then our gang comes in.
 NELSON
 I read a story like this.
 BILLY
 I like tits.
 JEN
 Whatever you say, sweetie honey sugar pie.
 YLLOWYYN
 [Obnoxious noise]
 NIA
 Why don’t you go find seating while I visit the privy?
 I need to wash some library dust out of my
 criminally-neglected fuck hole.
 IMAGINING - INT. Women’s Privy, A Few Minutes Later
 REGAN (V.O.)    
 So she’s in the girl’s room when three stupid pieces of
 shit - you know the kind. Think buying a knife’s the
 same as knowing how to use it - kick down the door.
 Probably looking for me.
 GRIMY MAN
 You’ve been seen with the Thief Queen. And because
 we’re gutless, spineless bugs with extra tear ducts
 where our gonads should be, we’re gonna beat up on a
 preacher and some kids to get to her.
 REGAN (V.O.)
 So Nia gets out her staff, says some flame spell...
 SOUND: WHOOSH OF A FIRE IGNITING
 NIA
 Need a light, boys?
 EXT. Ruins of the Lemming - Late Afternoon  
 BRENNEN
 I thought I was bad with words, your Grace.
 REGAN
 Best I could come up with. Whatever. Fuck you.
 BRENNEN
 That account is possible. But there’d be some sign of a
 struggle in here. Probably outside as well if there was
 a window. Nia would have tried to lead them away from
 the children.
 REGAN Shit.
 NARRATOR
 Regan spotted a glint in the ashes. She bent down to
 retrieve the remains of Jen’s "Compact" mirror,
 obviously charred and melted.
 BRENNEN
 She was probably just in to use the privy with Nia.
 REGAN
 She would have tried to warn everyone...
 NARRATOR
 Regan ran out into what was the main hall of the pub,
 literally following her road of thought.
 REGAN
 ...which means coming out here and trying to get out
 through the crowd.
 NARRATOR
 Brennen followed.
 BRENNEN
 If they were smart, they would have looked for an exit
 over--
 NARRATOR
 --With a sharp crack, Brennen’s foot fell through a
 weak plank in the floor.
 REGAN
 Woah, you all right there? Thought that sound mighta
 been your hip.
 BRENNEN
 I’ve fallen out of better shape than Your Grace will
 ever be in.
 NARRATOR
 Brennen groaned as he struggled to lift himself up.
 REGAN
 Quite the fall, huh?
 NARRATOR
 As Regan helped the old general to his feet, it became
 apparent that weak plank which felled Brennen was
 actually the lid of a trap door, hidden beneath the
 ashes.
 REGAN Nelson.
 
 BRENNEN Nelson.
 NARRATOR (cont’d)
 Regan improvised a torch from the rubble and hopped
 down. Brennen rubbed his bandaged arm for a moment and
 then followed.
 EXT. Same - A Few Hours Ago
 NARRATOR
 Earlier that day, before the fire, the Well-Groomed
 Lemming was indeed populated by students of
 Armstrungard College. I regret to say that there was no
 congressing occurring on the premises, however. Nia,
 having frequented the pub herself as a student, had in
 fact led our party to the Lemming’s doors.
 YLLOWYYN
 If we’re not going to the rendezvous point--
 NIA
 --you mean the city gates, also known as a city guard
 barracks?
 YLLOWYYN
 I was going to say, there is the practical matter of
 how we’ll find the General.
 NIA
 I just need a chance to think.
 YLLOWYYN
 Let’s hope he’s learned something about tracking from
 his time with me.
 NARRATOR
 With exaggerated nonchalance, Yllowyyn removed a golden
 arrowhead from his pouch, and dropped it in the dust
 outside the door as the group entered the Lemming.
 INT. Well-Groomed Lemming - Continuous
 NARRATOR
 Inside, the tavern’s clientele were not in fact
 discussing "studently matters," though they would have
 been on most other days. Today, however...
 MAN
 I don’t know. I just heard someone killed a guardsman.
 NELSON
 I bet there’s someone here who could give is a side
 quest.
 BILLY
 I think we got enough to deal with already, knob-stain.
 NELSON
 But experience. And items.
 NARRATOR
 Not knowing what else to do, the group sat down at the
 nearest table. They waited in silence until a barmaid
 came to serve them.
 WAITRESS
 (TO NIA)
 Haven’t seen you in a while. What can--
 NIA
 --Brandy, for the love of Galadon.
 NARRATOR
 Taken aback, the barmaid hurried off. The silence
 stretched interminably, until abruptly Jen lept from
 her seat. So sudden was her movement that her chair was
 thrown back, startling the group as it clattered to the
 floor.
 JEN
 I gotta pee.
 BILLY
 You want Nia to go with you?
 JEN
 No I’m good.
 NARRATOR
 Just as swiftly, Jen stalked away towards the privvy.
 Billy and Nelson stared at each other for a moment. If
 either hoped to find an ounce of understanding of the
 girl’s mind in the other’s face, they both were sorely
 dissapointed. Instead, they turned to Nia in unison.
 She withstood their silent pleading for only a moment
 before she rose from her own seat.
 NIA Blast it.
 NARRATOR
 As she headed towards the privy, Nia passed the
 barmaid, returning with the brandy and some glasses.
 Without breaking stride, Nia grabbed the bottle of
 liquor and took a large swig, directly from the bottle.
 INT. Well-Groomed Lemming, Girl’s Privy - Continuous    
 NARRATOR
 Jen stood at a water basin in the washroom. For a few
 moments, she simply stood and stared at her own hands.
 They were still coated with Sergeant McShane’s blood.
 She considered her stained hands, front and back,
 before slowly lowering them into the water.
 NARRATOR (cont’d)
 She scrubbed slowly and methodically, as if in a
 trance.
 SOUND: DOOR OPENS, PANNED TO NIA
 NIA I don’t know what to say.
 JEN
 You don’t have to say anything.
 NIA
 No one would deny that the world is better off without
 him.
 JEN
 Look, I know what you’re trying to do, but don’t, okay?
 NIA
 I said it before, there’s no shame--
 JEN
 --I’m not ready to talk about it. I need some time to
 myself.
 NIA
 ...Don’t let it fester, Jen.
 NARRATOR
 When Jen didn’t respond, Nia turned back to return to
 the boys and the brandy. Jen continued to scrub her
 hands in solitude. After a moment, she withdrew her
 "compact mirror" from her handbag. After considering
 her own reflection, she placed the mirror onto the
 basin. Once more she raised her hands in front of her
 face, focusing intensely.
 As she focused on her hands, there was a strange
 sensation in the room. To a mortal, it may have seemed
 like a hum or buzz, but seen, felt, and smelled, rather
 than heard. Nearly imperceptible at first, it grew in
 strength, and, as it did, Jen’s hair rose from her
 head.
 With a sudden snap, a tiny spark flew between Jen’s
 outstretched fingers, and then another, and another in
 quick succession. Startled, the cheerleader stumbled
 backwards, knocking the wash basin onto the floor. As
 she fell, the humming and the sparks suddenly stopped,
 although not before one fell to the sawdust floor of
 the privy. The sawdust, ignited by the spark, went up
 in flames unbelievably quickly.
 Jen stood, and, realizing there was no more water
 available, ran back towards the main room of the
 tavern.
 JEN
 FIRE! FIRE!!
 SOUND: PANICKED CROWD
 INT. Well-Groomed Lemming
 YLLOWYYN
 In the privy!?
 NIA
 How is there a fire in the privy!?
 BILLY
 Who cares how?!
 NARRATOR
 Students were tearing and clawing at each other in a
 desperate attempt to reach the building’s main
 entrance. Nia grabbed Jen by the wrist and started
 running in the opposite direction, towards the
 store-rooms in the back of the pub.
 NIA
 I know another way.
 NARRATOR
 In the pantry, Nia shoved aside some sacks of potatoes
 to reveal a trap door in the floor. She swung the door
 open. Not yet having learned his lesson about jumping
 into strange holes, Billy was the first through the
 opening. Yllowyyn hesitated, however.
 NIA
 It’s safe. Go!
 INT. Well-Groomed Lemming Wine Cellar - Nearly Continuous
 NARRATOR
 Moments later, the entire party was crouched in a
 narrow tunnel, some distance away from the Well-Groomed
 Lemming. Rather, from the remains of the Well-Groomed
 Lemming.
 YLLOWYYN
 I think we’re past the scope of the fire.
 NELSON Okay, even I have to ask why the college bar needed a secret passageway.
 NIA
 Armstrungard as we now know it is built atop the ruins
 of a much older city. An even more chaotic city, if you
 can believe that. Which reminds me, Jen, would you like
 to explain how the fire started?
 JEN
 No thank you.
 NARRATOR
 Nia tried to retort, but was cut off by Yllowyyn.
 YLLOWYYN
 This can wait. Sound carries too far down here.
 NARRATOR
 And with that, our party set off shuffling along the
 dank underbelly of Armstrungard. The Elf dropped
 another golden arrowhead in the muck.
 EXT. Crab’s Claw Inn
 SAME - a few hours later 
 NARRATOR
 Several hours later, Brennen and Regan emerged from the
 tunnels into a canal. As they stepped into the
 sunlight, the old general stooped to grab Yllowyyn’s
 14th arrowhead.
 REGAN
 ...and when I set it off and the vault walls blew,
 there’s this kick of hot air, right in the guts. BAM!
 Whoo, got me wetter than flood season on the Abergwyre.
 BRENNEN
 Very good, Your Grace, but need your every story
 contain such intimate details?
 REGAN
 I ain’t been laid in like a month, gimme a break.
 NARRATOR
 Their path led to an old rusted gate. Regan vaulted the
 gate and opened it from the other side. As Brennen
 passed through, Regan looked around, to get a sense of
 where in the city the tunnel released them.
 REGAN
 Well shit, this is right by Fallon’s place.
 BRENNEN
 Fallon?
 REGAN
 Jackie Fallon, guy I knew as a kid. He runs that inn
 over there. Lets students and shit stay there for dirt
 cheap.
 BRENNEN
 Philanthropist?
 REGAN
 Gods no. The more people come through here the more
 he’s got his finger on the pulse of this city.
 Information’s better than gold if you know how to sell
 it.
 BRENNEN
 My purse is a bit light since the castle.
 REGAN
 Don’t worry. My credit’s pretty good with him.
 BRENNEN
 Do me a favor and don’t tell me how you earned it.
 REGAN
 The trick with Fallon is to tell him just enough that
 he thinks he got something valuable. You throw a couple
 little clever lies in there, he can be pretty useful
 for throwing someone off your trail.
 NT. Crab’s Claw Inn - Continuous
 NARRATOR
 Jackie Fallon’s inn was crowded, but on the whole much
 cleaner than you might have expected from Regan’s
 recommendations. Jackie Fallon himself was working the
 bar when he spotted Regan as she entered.
 FALLON
 Well send me to Selbirin and call me Sally.
 REGAN
 Didn’t know that was your thing, Jackie. But I’m game.
 NARRATOR
 Jackie decided he could no longer ignore the old man
 who had entered with Regan and now stood beside her,
 looking woefully out of place.
 FALLON
 Hey, fella.
 NARRATOR
 Brennen was searching for the proper response when
 Regan stepped in to save him the trouble.
 REGAN
 This here’s my squire.
 FALLON
 Haha what squire? You ain’t no fucking knight.
 REGAN
 (MOCK WHISPERS)
 That’s what they call whores in some places. He’s a
 whore is my point. My whore.
 NARRATOR
 At this moment, Brennen may have preferred to have not
 been saved the trouble.
 REGAN
 Go grab us a table, "squire". I’m gonna catch up with
 the proprietor of this fine establishment.
 NARRATOR
 As Brennen left to do his queen’s bidding, Jackie
 pitched his voice slightly lower, so their conversation
 would not carry to any prying ears.
 FALLON
 So you like ’em halfway to the grave now?
 REGAN
 I was just fucking with him. He’s a mark. I’m supposed
 to be helping him find Gailin’s old crew. So what’s the
 word?
 FALLON
 You mean other than McShane getting ganked?
 REGAN
 WHAT?! You’re shitting me!
 FALLON
 Where the fuck you been? That’s the talk of the town.
 REGAN
 Clearly, or else you’d never tell me for free.
 FALLON
 You know, I almost missed you. I’ll throw you another
 freebie.
 REGAN
 Any word on who did it?
 FALLON
 Some girl nobody knows.
 NARRATOR
 Regan knew of some girl nobody knows whose last
 whereabouts were coincidentally right where McShane was
 murdered. Regan did not believe in coincidences in
 Armstrungard. She did well to hide her surprise,
 however.
 REGAN
 Probably one of his kids grew up and learned how to use
 a knife.
 FALLON
 I got another juicy little morsel about the whole
 thing.
 REGAN
 That so?
 FALLON
 I’d be willing to part with it if you tell me why you
 give a fuck.
 REGAN
 As it happens, I ain’t given a fuck in far too long.
 But I’d sure like to.
 NARRATOR
 Jackie Fallon matched Regan’s rather transparent grin
 with a somewhat regretful smile.
 FALLON
 Sorry, kid. I’d like to help you out...
 REGAN But?
 FALLON
 You ain’t heard?
 NARRATOR
 Jackie lifted a hand up from the bar, to show Regan a
 pewter wedding band around his finger.
 REGAN
 No fucking shit! What poor soul actually has to stick
 around with you the morning after?
 FALLON
 Remember Angie?
 REGAN
 Remember? I knew her before you did. Quite the catch
 though, Jackie. Nicely done.
 FALLON
 Well I thank you. But I’m afraid it’s gonna have to be
 coin, or tell me something I don’t know.
 NARRATOR
 As it happened, Regan was short on coin at the moment.
 She scrambled for a convenient lie to tell, but was
 saved the trouble by the arrival of Jackie’s bride.
 Angie Fallon looked haggard from a long shift waiting
 tables in the tavern, but her face brightened at the
 sight of Regan.
 ANGIE (O.S.)
 Is that who I think it is?
 REGAN
 In the flesh.
 ANGIE
 Feels like forever. You all catching up?
 NARRATOR
 Suddenly, a thought occurred to Regan as to how she
 might better facilitate the flow of information. Her
 smile widened imperceptibly.
 REGAN
 Yeah, we were just talking about you.
 ANGIE
 Leaving some things unsaid, I hope. A married woman’s
 still allowed a few secrets.
 FALLON
 As is her husband.
 NARRATOR
 Tactfully left unsaid by either was...how shall I...oh,
 fine. Regan had bedded both of them at one point or
 another but neither knew this about the other.
 REGAN
 Well I ain’t ever been married. But sharing a secret
 can really tighten the bonds between people, doncha
 think?
 ANGIE
 (CAUTIOUS)
 I guess that would depend on the secret.
 REGAN
 Well to have that effect, I suppose it’d have to be
 really quite intimate. Kinda secret you’re really
 scared of the other one finding out. But you still stay
 up late thinking about it some nights.
 INT. Fallon’s Bedchambers - 77 Minutes Later
 NARRATOR
 In case you’re the sententious type, I’ll spare you the
 details of the next 74 minutes. Though I suspect Regan
 herself would be quite happy to tell the tale in
 graphic, graphic detail.
 Suffice it to say, it was a much calmer Regan - at
 least by her standards - who rose from a small upstairs
 bed and quickly jumped back into her clothes. Mr. and
 Mrs. Fallon, on the other hand, were far too exhausted
 to even move, their faces blissful mirrors of
 contentment.
 REGAN
 So. Who popped the sore on the world that was Jamie
 gods-damned McShane?
 FALLON
 Dunno. But I do know there’s a knight looking for her
 too.
 NARRATOR
 Regan raised a single eyebrow.
 ANGIE
 Green falcon on a white field.
 NARRATOR
 With a wink and a small bow, Regan left the couple
 alone. As she retreated down the hallway, she was
 followed by sounds coming from the room she just left.
 Apparently, Jackie and Angie had found another well of
 energy.
 INT. Crab’s Claw Inn - Continuous
 NARRATOR
 Regan returned to the public room of the inn, and found
 Brennen. The old general looked less than pleased at
 having been left to himself in this place. His skin
 also had also taken on a clammy, ashen pallor.
 REGAN
 Bad news. Don’t look at me like that. Killed a lot of
 birds with that stone. Well, stones. Pretty nice ones,
 too, far as they go.
 BRENNEN
 [Dismayed grunt]
 REGAN
 You wanna smell my fingers?
 NARRATOR
 Brennen chose not to respond. He took another small sip
 of his ale, and wiped at his brow, which was sweating
 more than one might have expected, given the
 temperature in the bar.
 REGAN
 You don’t look so good, Grandpa.
 BRENNEN
 Probably something I ate in this pit.
 REGAN
 Oh, shit. How’s your arm feeling?
 BRENNEN
 It’s fine.
 REGAN
 Lemme see.
 BRENNEN
 It can wait until the children are safe, your Grace.
 REGAN
 So yeah, about that. I found out what happened at
 Bailey’s. Remember that piece of shit I told you about?
 McShane? Somebody stabbed him.
 BRENNEN
 Dammit. Billy? Maybe Nelson but I doubt it. DAMMIT!
 REGAN
 Word going around said it was a girl. Matched Jen’s
 description.
 BRENNEN
 No! That strains belief.
 REGAN
 Doesn’t mean she did it, just means everyone thinks she
 did it.
 BRENNEN
 It would be madness for them to split up, but that
 means the greater part of the city guard will be
 looking for them all.
 REGAN
 Not just guard. Do you know anyone who flies a green
 falcon on a white field?
 NARRATOR
 As ill as Brennen had already looked, he managed to
 turn a shade more pale at the mention of this standard.
 BRENNEN
 That’s Sir Jasper Frieshelm. Ardel Redmoor’s
 executioner.
 A BEAT.
 BRENNEN (cont’d)
 And the only man ever to best me in single combat.
 END OF ACT TWO.
Category:Episode Transcripts