Mail Call/Transcript

The cast is seen eating breakfast in the cafeteria.
Clinko: MAIL CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALL!
Gucci Flip Flop: Woah, we have-
Clinko: MAIL CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALL!
C: We get it.
Clinko: We have a letter for Candy Paint, a package for Pearly, a letter for Comic Book, a Hot-Guy magazine for C, 274 fan letters for Maybe, and an anonymous package.
One by one, the contestants, besides for C, get their mail.
Gucci Flip Flop: Yo, don’t forget your Hot-Guy magazine.
C: Just, shut up. I didn’t order that.
Gucci Flip Flop, Maybe, and Neon Grassy snicker. C stomps up the Clinko, grabs the magazine, rips it up, and tosses it into the trash.
Paperclip Snake: Who’s the package for?
Clinko: Anonymous. Don’t open it, I’ll be back.
Clinko leaves.
Paperclip Snake: I’m going to open it.
Paper Lantern: No! Not good idea!
Paperclip Snake: Yeah, whatever.
Paperclip Snakes slithers up to the package.
C: You don’t even have arms.
Paperclip Snake: At least I’m not interested in Hot-Guy magazines.
C gets flustered. Gucci Flip Flop, Maybe, and Neon Grassy burst out laughing.
C: OH, SO THIS IS YOUR IDEA OF A PRANK, HUH?!
Gucci Flip Flop: Chill, man. It’s just one time.
Neon Grassy: Except for the 20 other magazines you’re gonna get.
Gucci Flip Flop, Maybe, and Neon Grassy continue to laugh.
Paper Lantern: Me am confuse. What “Hot-Guy” magazine?
Yoylebook: You poor, innocent soul…
Milkshake puckers her lips and takes a selfie.
Paperclip Snake: Help me get this box open.
Maybe: Maybe.
Paperclip Snake: Does anybody have a knife?
Pearly: W-why would we h-have a knife?... knives are scary…
Paperclip Snake: To open the box.
Maybe: Maybe.
Paperclip Snake: Anyone?
Maybe: Maybe.
Paperclip Snake: Shush.
Maybe: Maybe.
Paperclip Snake: …
Maybe: Maybe.
Candy Paint: Let’s just keep on eating, okay? It’s not like we NEED to open it.
Paperclip Snake: Good point.
Paperclip Snake slithers back to his seat. The cast continues eating in silence.
Candy Paint: I’m opening it.
Candy Paint runs to the package and starts tugging it’s strings.
Candy Paint: Come on, come on!
Candy Paint uses her teeth.
Candy Paint: Okay, no, I should stop.
Candy Paint takes a seat.
Candy Paint: …
Maybe: Maybe I’ll try.
Candy Paint: No, I’ll do it.
Candy Paint runs up to the package.
Candy Paint: No, I’m not.
Maybe walks up to the package and shakes it.
Candy Paint: GIMME THAT!
Candy Paint takes the package and attempts to open it.
Gucci Flip Flop: Uh…
Candy Paint: I. NEED. TO. OPEN. IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!
Candy Paint starts hitting the package.
Neon Grassy: Your girlfriend is having a mental breakdown over that package.
Gucci Flip Flop: Oh god…
Neon Grassy: The fries put her on the edge and the package chucked her down the cliff.
Candy Paint: Someone hide it so I don’t open it!
Comic Book: On it!
Comic Book hides it.
Candy Paint: …
Comic Book: …
Candy Paint: …
Comic Book: …
Candy Paint: WHERE DID YOU PUT IT?!
Comic Book: IN THE CLOSET PLEASE DON’T HURT ME!
Candy Paint goes into the closet and sees the package.
Candy Paint: Finally…
Candy Paint takes a knife and cuts open the package. An inflatable alien pops out, pressing her against the ceiling.
Candy Paint: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
The End
Category:Transcripts