Squidward's Wish

Squidward's Wish is the sixth episode of the first season of Fairly OddBob.
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==Plot==
Squidward wishes for SpongeBob and Patrick to disappear into the void and never come back. But without SpongeBob, the Krusty Krab is in peril and eventually closes down. Without a job, Squidward loses all his money. So he must decide if he should continue on with his poor life, or bring back SpongeBob and Patrick.
==Transcript==
[the episode opens at the Krusty Krab. We see Squidward depressed.]
Squidward: [sighs] Welcome to the Krusty Krab, where its usually the most depressing place in the world, or at least for me.
SpongeBob: Hey Squidward, why do you look upset?
Squidward: Wouldn't you like to know? You're always happy here at the Krusty Krab, at Jellyfish Fields, and at your pineapple house, whereas I'm always upset BECAUSE OF YOU!!!
SpongeBob: Because of me? What did I do?
Squidward: You constantly sing at the Krusty Krab all the time, and make huge rackets at your house with Patrick!
SpongeBob: I will admit, I am pretty annoying. But that was me in Seasons 5 to 8 of my show, now I'm smarter and cooler.
Squidward: You've also tortured me at times during those seasons, whereas I'm always depressed and upset.
SpongeBob: I wish there was a way that I could make you feel better, although I tried doing that before which didn't turn out so well, except for that party scene.
Squidward: I told you before not to mention that day again.
SpongeBob: Oh, sorry Squidward. Well, guess I'll go back to making those patties now! [walks back into the kitchen]
Squidward: See what I mean? Just wish there was a way that I could get rid of SpongeBob and Patrick.
[Timmy, Cosmo, and Wanda poof in front of Squidward]
Timmy: Hey Squidward! Why do you look upset?
Squidward: I always feel depressed when I come to work because of that yellow sponge working the oven, and his annoying best friend, the starfish.
Cosmo: Gah! You're depressed?? Oh no, another depression in the world is starting up!!
Timmy: Not that depression, he's depressed because of SpongeBob and Patrick. But why is it that you are depressed because of SpongeBob and Patrick?
Squidward: Its a long story, probably would be good to explain while on the road in the middle of nowhere.
Wanda: Wow, this is more serious than I thought.
Cosmo: Oh man! I hate serious stuff! It always takes a very long time to finish! I'm going to hide underground.
[Cosmo poofs himself underground, while Wanda poofs him back]
Cosmo: Hey!! I was having a blast down there!
Wanda: Cosmo this is serious! Squidward is always depressed while at work and at home, we should do something to make him feel better.
Timmy: Hmm, this may be the worst thing I've ever said, but maybe you could wish SpongeBob and Patrick gone!
Squidward: You can do that? Now my day is starting to get better! I wish SpongeBob and Patrick disappeared into the void and will never come back!
[Cosmo and Wanda try to grant Squidward's wish, but their wands lose power. Then they poof Da Rules]
Wanda: Oh dear, it says you can't wish anybody to disappear. And hey, you're not our godchild! So you can't make a wish!
Squidward: What?! Thats ridiculous! You don't know how long I've been wanting SpongeBob and Patrick to disappear.
Timmy: This might be the worst thing I've ever done, but I'll try saying the wish. I wish-
Jorgen von Strangle: Turner!!! [poofs in front of everyone] Turner and Tentacles, I can't believe you two! Wishing somebody to disappear, thats the worst wish ever!! Although, come to think of it, that rule is outdated, which means you can still use it!
Squidward: Really??!!
Jorgen: Indeed! I'm happy that I can use the wish, so I can poof Binky into the void as well!
Timmy: Well, what are we waiting for. And I still think this is a bad idea, but its for Squidward: I wish-
Jorgen: You know what? I'll just give Squidward here a free wish.
Squidward: Yay! I wish SpongeBob and Patrick disappeared into the void and never came back!
[Cosmo, Wanda, and Jorgen make the wish, and we see SpongeBob disappear in the kitchen. Then we see Patrick, who is about to walk into the Krusty Krab, disappear as well.]
Jorgen: Ooh, lets not forget Binky! [Binky disappears as well]
Squidward: YES!!! SpongeBob and Patrick are gone! Now I feel much happier!
Wanda: Thats great!
Cosmo: I'm happy too! Now I won't have to feed as many mouths anymore!
Timmy: So where is the void?
Jorgen: How should I know? I may be the strongest fairy, but I actually don't know much about the void.
[cut to the "void"]
SpongeBob: What is this creepy place? Its just pitch black, and I don't see anything. Except....except for that pink dot over there. [moves closer to the pink dot which was revealed to be Patrick]
SpongeBob: Patrick?!
Patrick: SpongeBob?!
Both: What are you doing here? And what is this place?
[they see a sign]
SpongeBob: The void? We're in the void?
Patrick: Oh man, not this place again! I had an accident in my pants earlier, and I had to throw it somewhere in the void. And this must be where I put it.
SpongeBob: We must be the only two living things here.
Binky: Don't forget me!
[Patrick catapults Binky into who knows where]
SpongeBob: Lets try and find a way back home.
Patrick: Good idea. I want to get back home so I can go in your pineapple house and finish reading your diary that I read while you were practicing driving for the 39th time.
SpongeBob: You read my diary Patrick?
Patrick: Hey, I got bored!
[cut to Squidward's house, where Squidward is throwing a party]
Squidward: Woo! It feels great not to have SpongeBob and Patrick near me again! I can finally have peace and quiet.
[phone rings]
Squidward: Hello?
Mr. Krabs: Squidward! You're supposed to be here managing the cash register! What are you up to?
Squidward: Oh, uh, nothing sir! I'll run as fast as I can back to the restaurant!
Mr. Krabs: Make it snap- [Squidwards runs through the door] py.
[cut to Squidward filling out orders]
Harold: I'll have one Krabby Patty please.
Squidward: Sure thing sir! Oh, wait a second, SpongeBob isn't behind the grill.
Nat: He isn't?! But he's always behind the grill!
Harold: I'm getting hungry.
Fred: Hurry up!
Customers: We want Krabby Patties! We want Krabby Patties!
Mr. Krabs: Squidward! Whats going on here?
Squidward: The crowd's demanding their patties, but they can't get any because SpongeBob isn't behind the grill, and he's the only one that can cook Krabby Patties the best.
'Mr. Krabs: 'Where is my fry cook???!!!
Harold: You know what? I'm outta here.
Nat: Yeah, me too!
[the customers leave the Krusty Krab]
Mr. Krabs: Nooooo! My money is walking out the door! Ohhhhh, wait till I get my hands on SpongeBob!!!
Squidward: What are you going to do to SpongeBob if you ever see him? Which will never happen.
Mr. Krabs: I will....oh forget it. What matters is getting my fry cook back.
Squidward: Well lets hope the Krusty Krab will survive without him.
[time cards pulls up and says "ONE WEEK LATER"]
French narrator: One week later.
[we see the Krusty Krab dirty, dusty, and falling apart]
Mr. Krabs: We haven't had a customer in a week. And I lost all my money thanks to those stupid bills!
Squidward: Well, I don't mind. I'm happy that I don't have to hear to that obnoxious laughter from SpongeBob every day.
Mr. Krabs: Squidward, don't you think we should go look for SpongeBob? My business is doomed, and I miss the little yellow guy.
Squidward: I can't tell you how much I've gotten annoyed by that little yellow freak. I don't want to look for him.
Mr. Krabs: Its true that he can be a bit of a pain, but he's a great guy and a wonderful fry cook! Don't you miss him too?
Squidward: Oh please, I'll never miss him.
Mr. Krabs: Well, without SpongeBob, I'm gonna have to close up shop. And since I don't have any money left, Pearl and I are gonna have to stay with me mother!
Squidward: So you're actually going to close up the Krusty Krab for good? But that would mean I wouldn't get any more money! [he and Mr. Krabs walk out the door]
Mr. Krabs: Mr. Squidward, hope you find another job or a good life. But its the end of the Krusty Krab. Goodbye.
Squidward: Wow, since the restaurant closed down, I'm not gonna get any more money! But it still beats having to deal with SpongeBob.
[time card pulls up that says "TWO DAYS LATER"]
French narrator: Two days later.
[we see Squidward poor and his house falling apart]
Squidward: Ohhh, what have I done? I was happy earlier that SpongeBob and Patrick were gone, but now I have a poor life, and without SpongeBob, the Krusty Krab was falling apart and eventually closed.
[Timmy, Cosmo, and Wanda enter Squidward's house]
Timmy: Hi Squidward, are you okay?
Squidward: Not particualy. The Krusty Krab closed down since SpongeBob wasn't there, and Mr. Krabs and I lost all our money. Hate to say this, but now I'm depressed again.
Timmy: I see. Well you know? SpongeBob may be annoying, but he's a great friend. Don't you feel lonely without SpongeBob and Patrick on your sides?
Cosmo: They actually glued themselves to Squidward? Now I officially hate super glue!!! [throws the super glue in the trash]
Wanda: They didn't literally stick to him. They were just on each side of Squidward's house, and sometimes Squidward himself.
Squidward: Oh man, I can't figure out if I should continue being poor, or bring back SpongeBob and Patrick. I had a rough history with them, but you know? I do actually miss them. It just doesn't seem the same.
Timmy: I'll try and wish them back. I wish SpongeBob and Patrick came back from the void!
[Cosmo and Wanda try to grant the wish, but their wands lose power]
Cosmo and Wanda: We can't wish them back!
Wanda: Don't you guys remember what that wish was earlier?
Cosmo: Quote: " I wish SpongeBob and Patrick disappeared into the void and never came back."
Wanda: You wished for them to never come back, so we can't wish them back.
Squidward: But I don't want to live the poor life. Guess I'll have to look for the void myself. Wait a second, I can just wish myself into the void!
Timmy: I'll do the wish for you. I wish Squidward was in the void!
[Cosmo and Wanda grant the wish and we see Squidward in the void]
Squidward: Wow, so this is the void. Its so dark, I can hardly see anything. It could be like space only without the starts, planets, gravity, etc. Oh, focus Squiddy! Now to find SpongeBob and Patrick.
[cut to Squidward still walking in the void]
Squidward: Seems like the void just goes on forever. [hears a loud roar in the distance and gets scared] Wha- wha- what was that? It sounded like a loud roar from a giant troll.
[Squidward sees a shadow, and the shadow was revealed to be a giant troll]
Squidward: [screams] It is a giant troll!
[Squidward runs for a long time then trips over something]
Squidward: What the? Whats a yellow box and ping triangle doing here in the void? Hey, wait a minute! SpongeBob! Patrick!
SpongeBob: Ohhhh, Squidward? Is that you? I don't feel so good.
Patrick: Neither do I.
Squidward: Its so great to see you guys again! And...what the? You guys okay?
SpongeBob: Not really, wish there were food in the void. If I don't eat anything soon I'll die.
Squidward: You know? I actually snuck Timmy's sandwich in my pocket while he wasn't looking. I also snuck a chocolate chip cookie in my other pocket, so here you go, I guess. [gives SpongeBob the sandwich and Patrick the cookie]
SpongeBob: Squidward you're a life saver! [hugs Squidward]
Squidward: Whatever.
[they hear the loud roar again, and the giant troll appears. They each scream very loud]
Patrick: That is one ugly troll! But he's not as ugly as Monster Fluffy!
SpongeBob: You saw that episode, huh?
Patrick: I oughta punch you for being a jerk to Gary.
SpongeBob: Lets not worry about that, now's the time to run from that giant troll!
Squidward: No, lets fight it! It could have weaknesses!
SpongeBob: I don't know Squidward, it seems really tricky.
Squidward: Its either that or us getting killed. Lets do it!
[they start punching the giant troll from different angles]
SpongeBob: I'll bet that hurts doesn't it giant troll? [punches the troll in the face]
[suddenly, the troll lands flat on its back, crushing SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward]
Squidward: Oh, its no good. If only Timmy and his fairies were here.
Timmy: And we are!
SpongeBob: Woah, how did you guys get here?
Wanda: We were watching you on TV, and noticed you didn't seem to be a match for the giant troll, so we came to help.
Squidward: You were watching us on TV the entire time?
Cosmo: Yep! And I'd have to give the episode a -5/10!
Patrick: No fair! I was gonna give the episode a rating first!
Timmy: Uh guys? The monster?
SpongeBob: Oh yeah.
[they continue punching the troll from different angles, and Cosmo and Wanda use their wands to shock the troll. Suddenly a huge boot lands on top of the troll, crushing it]
Patrick: Bigger boot!
SpongeBob: No wait Patrick! This boot saved our lives, and, hey...wait a second.
[the boot lifts up and Dennis appears]
All: [scream] DENNIS!!!!!
Dennis: Did ya miss me?
SpongeBob: But, but, but how? You got stuck on the boat again and...
Dennis: Just a miracle isn't it? Now that I got you guys right where I want you, I'm goint to step on you!
Timmy: Not so fast! [whispers something in Cosmo and Wanda's ears]
[Cosmo and Wanda poof Dennis the same boat that he got stuck on]
Dennis: ARGH! Why does this keep happening to me??!!
Timmy: Well that takes care of that problem!
SpongeBob: Yup! But you never know when Dennis may strike again!
[cut to SpongeBob's pineapple]
Wanda: Ah, everything is back to normal! We got SpongeBob and Patrick back, the Krusty Krab reopened, and the giant troll and Dennis have disappeared!
SpongeBob: But I still don't understand. How come Dennis got stuck to a boot and fell to the ocean?
[suddenly, the cyclops from The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie appears. Everybody screams]
Squidward: And here we go again.
[the episode ends]
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