Munchkins and Dragons/Back Cover/Chapter 1

<tabber>Prolouge=--March 12, 2018--
DM:Welcome, everyone. Now that we have five of you gathered up.. I can now welcome you all.. To this D&D campaign!
Bob:Oh yeah!! D&D!! Finally! I can use this character sheet!
Chuck:Wait, what edition of D&D were we playing again?
DM:3.5e, of course! After all, as we all know..
Everyone else in the group:...Fourth edition ruined the game.
DM:Yep, there you go! Just remember that, and you'll know why we always use 3.5e!
Bob:What about 5e? It's clearly better than that the junk we call 4e.
DM:Maybe when I get more experienced in it.
Bob:So, I'll be playing as a Dwarven fighter. So, I'll be rolling my stats! *rolls 4d6 six times, dropping the lowest each time* 14, 11, 16, 11, 14, 10.. Well, I'll put the 10 in Charisma, Intelligence and Wisdom will be 11, put a 14 in Dexterity and Constitution, and the 16 for Strength! Strength is AWESOME! Now.. Dwarves have -2 Charisma and +2 Constitution, so applying that, and.. there! And call my character Boladin!!
Chuck:I'll be a human cleric. And I already filled out my sheet, here you go, DM. I'm Clara, by the way.
Deric:And I'm going to be the thief! Halfing Rouge, ready to go! 8, 9, 18, 16, 13, 16! Drogo's my name, and treasure is my game! 
Gianna:An 18? Pretty good! You have some high stats! You must be lucky! And what's a nice D&D campaign without a good, playful bard? I'll be playing as the bard, and a gnome! You can call me.. Gimble! That's a funny name, isn't it? Gnomes usually have many names, but I'll be using the funniest!
Alex:Now for my class! I'll be the Wizard! And, based on my rolls, I have a 16 in Constitution, I'll put my 18 into Intellegence, the best stat for a wizard, Dexterity gets my 14, 12 is my Wisdom, 10 is my Charisma.. And 7 is my strength. My character's name is Avia.
Bob:What? Why'd you make Strength your lowest stat?
Alex:Hey, you said you'd be the fighter! You're doing the fighting, right? Why do I need strength when you're going to be doing the fighting? I do have spells, but that doesn't depend on Strength! And, everyone.. Here's my list of skills. Perhaps if we SHARED them with each other, we'd be able to optimize them all from each other, and have a wide arrange of them!
Chuck:We're JUST getting together in the game. Our characters wouldn't know each other's skills! Therefore, there is no reason why we should be showing them to each other-Else it is metagaming!
DM:..He has a point.
Deric:Alex!! You can't know EVERYTHING!! Training yourself in EVERY kind of knowledge? No fair!
Alex:Putting a skill point in all 10 types of knolwedge isn't against the rules-I have the skill points for this. Also, it's not knowing everything-I could still fail the Knolwedge check, you know. It's just now I actually have a chance.
DM:...*sigh* I'll allow it. Only because you got an 18 in Intelligence, and because you only put one in each of them besides Arcana.
Deric:Wow, you're such a munchkin, Alex. You know, I'm roleplaying as the rouge! And you know how rouges would want the MOST money, right? If you keep this up, and start gaining much more gold than everyone else, my character might just decide to steal from you..
Alex:Well he can try!! You can bet it won't work!
Deric:Oh, it'll be on.
DM:Well, now that you all created your characters, it's time for the campaign to begin! Let us enter the world, of Dungeons and Dragons! 
|-|Part 0=Backstory Time
DM:So, each of you are all in the same inn.
Deric:What's it called?
DM:..Oh.. It's called... the Crossed Swords!
DM:Anyways, now it's time for you all to give your backstories. What brought you all here? What are your motivations?
Chuck:..We're not supposed to use each other's backstories, though.. That's metagaming, because our characters don't know each other at first.
DM:..Makes somewhat sense.. How about this:You give the backstory that your character would tell the rest of the party? You guys can just hand me notes of the details you changed or left out..
Alex:Well, in that case.. Avia, an aspiring citizen, has looked into adventuring for a while, but only now has she decided that she's ready to actually do it! 
Bob:Boladin had always wanted to be a warrior:To fight for his land one day.. And as taken up adventuring as the journey to that, and he'll be going to fight those vicious beasts that roam the dungeons and wilderness..
Chuck:As a cleric, Clara has always gone out of her way to help those in need, through healing. She's taken on adventuring to enhance her abilities, so that she may spread goodness even more. ...That's all she'd say.
Deric:..A rouge? ..That's about it. Rouges don't give much detail about their past, you know.
Gianna:A Bard's main passion is entertainment, and lifting the spirits of people! And, with a party, there's people he can do this with ALL THE TIME! Isn't that great! He's always keeping people happy!
DM:There, that's everyone. ..Each of you, had aspired to become an adventurer.. And today, will be the day that you all unite. Where you form your party.. 
|-|Part 1=And So It Begins
Chuck:Wait. Isn't it a tavern we start in? Not an inn?
DM:This particular tavern contains an inn as well. And now it's time for.. PLOT!
Bob:So.. what do we do? When can we get to fighting?
Deric:So, how do we meet? When do we start our journey?
Gianna:Really? This cliché?
DM:You just happened to all end up at the same table. Is that good enough for you? And Gianna, you ALWAYS start a tavern! That's how you're supposed to start the game! Where else are you supposed to meet, some place in the woods? This is where the exposition is!
Bob:Why can't we just start with battling stuff!
DM:None of that will make any sense, if we don't start with EXPOSITION!
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DM:You find yourselves together-After some conversation, you all learn that each of you aspired to be an adventurer.. Quite quickly, you became companions, and formed a party.
DM:Now who's the leader?
All (except the DM of course):Me!
DM:..I should have known. How about this? If you couldn't be the leader, who would you choose?
Alex:Gimble! Bards are great leaders!
Deric:Gimble! Bards are common leaders.
Bob:Avia! She has MAGIC! ..I would choose the Ranger, but we don't have one.
Gianna:Clara! She's a cleric:She's a patron of Palor himself, after all!
DM:Looks like Gimble's the leader then!
Chuck:Hey, shouldn't we just roll Diploma-
DM:Too late:Gimble's leader.
Chuck:Aw, come on!
|-|Part 2=The Start of (Mis)Adventure!
DM:So, you're in the inn! So.. Are you going to try and speak to one of the other people around here or what?
Bob:What? No, I want us to just get to the fighting! In fact..
Boladin:So, we're all here, so, now what? How do we become adventurers?
Avia:Well, we just wait for someone to call out for an adventure, say we're adventurers so we get a quest, and do that quest!
Deric:Hey!! No breaking the fourth wall!
DM:..Alex, you're going to have to change that line.
Alex:Oh, alright..
Avia:We're already together, aren't we? A full-scale party.. We're ALREADY adventurers. We just need to actually go on an adventure.
Alex:That better?
DM:Yes.
Alex:So, I'd wait until a quest comes up.. It's bound to happen eventully..
Bob:Same.
Chuck:Yeah, same.
DM:...And it does! For goblins are neaded towards the town, and your job is to stop the,!
Alex:Good, we accept the quest!
Bob:Yes, actual fighting!
Deric:Not every quest is fighting, you know! Maybe we should wait for an easier quest? I'm sure another party is here somewhere taking on quests..
DM:There is, but they're not in this inn. 
Gianna:Maybe we should try doing something nobody's tried before-Trying to make friends with the goblins, and just get them to stop, turning them good! Have they even killed anyone yet?
DM:No, but the last five times goblins showed up, they did kill.
Gianna:So yeah, let's do that!
Alex:And ruin our shot at getting XP out of this?
Gianna:..We'll bring our weapons just in case it comes to fighting. Besides, the goal of the game is to have fun, not to gain the most XP!
Bob:Why can't we fight?
Gianna:Maybe we will!