Major Swirling Waters

Major Swirling Waters is a Fiber Optic Field Trip category from YOU DON'T KNOW JACK that initiates a phone call between Ed Johnson of Grand Rapids, Michigan and leads into the question Steel.
===Introduction===
"Major Swirling Waters? Wait a second," [beat] "That reminds me of… Big… Grand… Rapids. Grand Rapids, Michigan!"
===Area Code Introduction===
"And you reach Grand Rapids, Michigan by calling Area Code 616!"
===Pre-Phone Talk===
"'Kay, I have my Grand Rapids uh," [opening phone book, turning page] "White Pages in front of me, and uh, God knows that I don't go anywhere without it. I'm just gonna flip here at random and see-" [flipping page] "-if I can't come up with somebody. Aaand looks like…" [firmly touches the page] "Mr. Ed Johnson!"
===Calling the Number===
NATE: Okay, let's see if we can uh, [dialtone] get a hold of- [dialing number, inhales] Ed, [dialing continues, inhales] here in uh, [dialing stops, inhales] Grand Rapids, Michigan. We're calling, uh… [dialtone] see if Ed'll join us for a Fiber Optic Field Trip. Uh, Ed Johnson, ladies and gentlemen. See if he's home. [dialtone, interrupted by Ed picking up]
===Phone Talk===
ED: Hello?
NATE: Hello, is this uh, is this Ed Johnson?
ED: You're speakin' to Ed Johnson.
NATE: E-Ed! How ya doin'? How ya doin' today?
ED: [clicking mouth] I'm alright. Who is this?
NATE: I'm the host of YOU DON'T KNOW JACK.
ED: Wh-Who don't I know?
NATE: Nuh-No, YOU DON'T KNOW JACK. I-It's a quiz show on CD-Rom.
ED: Oh. Yeah?
NATE: [stifled gasp] Well, uh- [exhale, laugh, inhale] Ed, uh listen. [inhale] What do ya do for a livin' Ed?
ED: [beat, inhale] Uh, I'm a… steel worker here in Grand Rapids. Y-y'know, You uhh ne-need to know the name of… my company or?-
NATE: No, no, I don't need to know the name of your company. That's- we can't do any free advertising. [inhales] But I'll tell ya what I would like.
ED: What's that?
NATE: [inhales] Ed, uh, we called you at random hoping you could come up with a question for our quiz game. [inhales] It could be anything, anything you-y-ya know about that we can quiz our contestants on. You think you could do that?
ED: Okay, I guess I could do that.
NATE: Okay, great. [inhales] Now, I'm gonna put you on with our producer. You think of a good question, we'll be back to ya in a couple minutes, Okay?
ED: Yeah, that's fine.
===Post Phone Conversation===
NATE: Okay, terrific. We'll talk to you in a bit, Ed.
ED: Alright.
NATE: Alright, B'bye.
ED: Bye.
NATE: Okay, we'll get back to Ed in a couple of questions, but in the meantime, let's pick another category.
===Pre Question Conversation===
NATE: Okay, let's go back to our Fiber Optic Field Trip. We got Ed Johnson from Grand Rapids, Michigan on the line. Ed, are you there?
ED: Yeah.
NATE: Hokay. [inhales] Ed, let 'er rip, man.
ED: [inhales] Oh, uh- y- uh- hol- hold up. Hold on a… J-
NATE: Ed? 
ED: Jean, where's that piece of paper?
JEAN: [inhales] Right next to the phone, Ed.
[Nate laughs while breathing]
ED: R-oh. Yeah. Alright, here it is. Okay. 
NATE: [continues laughing, exhales] Ey-you-you got it? you ready, Ed?
ED: Yeah.
NATE: Okay, let's hear it.
ED: [quick exhale, inhales] Okay.
Category:YOU DON’T KNOW JACK Questions
Category:Fiber Optic Field Trip