Neighbor War/Transcript

The following is a transcript for the episode "Neighbor War".
== ==
(Branch is in his bunker doing a puzzle with Gary.)
Branch: (sighs contentedly) Gotta say, there’s nothing more relaxing than assembling a 40,000-piece jigsaw puzzle in the quiet of your own home. (He hears a crash.) Gary, we’re under attack! (He looks through the telescope and sees glitterballs being thrown outside. He looks around more and sees Sky Toronto throwing glitterballs.) Sky Toronto? (He goes outside.) Hey! Who do you think you are?!
Sky: Sky Toronto. My Funtime Factory supplies every party, soiree, and shindig in Troll Village. My card. (He gives Branch his card.)
Pop-up: Sky Toronto. There’s no funny business in my fun business. (A horn covers Branch in yellow glitter.)
Branch: Yeah, I know who you are. I want to know what you’re doing. (He shakes the glitter of his face.)
Sky: Came out to the country for some R&R&D: rest, research, and development. We think these paint poppers will be the next glitter.
Branch: Well, can you not do that in my very private, very quiet, intentionally secluded area?
Sky: Apologies, didn’t realize I was in your yard. I’ll move… to my yard. (He throws a red glitterball at Branch’s bunker.) Hot all of that one.
Branch: Wait, what do you mean “your yard”?
Sky: (Pushing a bush to reveal his vacation home) This is my new vacation pod. Still under construction.
Construction Troll: Back to work! (His workers get back to work.)
Sky: It’ll be incredibly loud, but it will also take a long time.
Branch: But you- well, I-but I-
Sky: (clears his throat) Hm. Gibberish, how quaint. We done here, neighbor? Sky Jr. will be here soon, and we need some quality time. (A Troll opens a suitcase revealing his son which is actually a bow-tie. Then Sky puts it on.) Excellent. Welcome home, Sky Jr. (The Troll gives him some cookies and he throws them to Branch as he leaves.) For your trouble. (The cookies hit Branch in the face and he grunts. Meanwhile, Poppy is in her royal attire welcoming new saps to the village.)
Poppy: I now declare this new sapling an official part of Troll Village. (The crowd cheers and a band plays music. A photographer comes up.)
Photographer: Smile! (He takes a picture of Poppy. Branch then comes up to her.)
Branch: Poppy, I’ve got a problem, and as queen, you’ve got to fix it.
Poppy: It’ll have to wait, Branch. My queen itinerary is packed, given all of these tree sproutings lately. (She shows Branch a few more saps.) I now declare this sapling an official part of Troll Village. (She cuts the ribbon and the crowd cheers again.)
Photographer: Smile!
Branch: But-but it’s urgent. (He follows Poppy.) Sky Toronto is building a vacation pod right next door to me.
Poppy: Good for him. I now declare this sapling an official part of Troll Village. (She cuts the ribbon and the crowd cheers once more.)
Photographer: Smile!
Branch: What? No, no, no. You’re not listening. He just invaded my part of the forest.
Poppy: There is no “your part.” The forest belongs to everyone. And Sky needs a place to get away. He has the most important, hardest job in Troll Village.
Branch: Oh, please. Why does everyone sweat that guy so much? His job is a piece of cake… often literally. (We go to a flashback where Sky is trying a sample of a slice of chocolate cake. He spits it out into a bucket.)
Past Sky: It’s chocolatey. But could it be… more chocolatey?
Worker Troll #1: What?!
Worker Troll #2: Great idea!
Worker Troll #3: He’s a genius. (We go back to the present.)
Poppy: Branch, just be a good neighbor to Sky and let me focus. I now declare this sapling an official part of Troll Village. (She accidentally cuts the sap in half and the crowd gasps.)
Branch: Um, I think you just- (Poppy becomes very angry.)
Poppy: BRANCH!!!
Photographer: Smile!
Poppy: Ugh. (Later, Branch is in his bunker doing his puzzle.)
Branch: Hm. (Just then, loud hip-hop music plays, causing the puzzle pieces to bounce. Branch growls and goes to Sky who is relaxing near his fountain wearing a white dressing gown.) Sky!
Sky: Hold on. This is the best part. (He closes his eyes for a moment.) DJ Carefree’s 9th mix in G-minor. Ah. A revelation.
Branch: Sky, if we’re gonna be neighbors, we need to talk rules.
Sky: Glad your brought that up. Please don’t drop by unannounced. I moved here for the peace and quiet. Okay, good talk. I’ll play you out. (He turns on loud music and the Troll gives him cookies.) For your trouble. (He throws the cookies in Branch’s face again and leaves.)
Branch: No, Sky, I’m gonna play you out. Maybe not with music, but you’re gonna move. (He walks away and comes back for the cookies.) These are actually really good. (He walks away again. At his vacation pod the next day, Sky is playing hopscotch.)
Sky: Ideal hop rate. Still got it Toronto. (Branch appears with a wheelbarrow with fertilizer.)
Branch: Morning, neighbor. Just out fertilizing the lawn. (He pours the fertilizer onto the lawn.) Ooh! (The fertilizer goes through Sky’s fence. It ends up inches from Sky’s feet.)
Sky: (sighs) Ugh! (He pinches his nose.)
Branch: It smells incredibly bad, but I also do it frequently.
Sky: I see what we’re doing. (He fixes his bow-tie.) Just remember, when you poke the Sky, you bring the thunder. (Thunder is heard in the background.)
Branch: Yeah? Well, when you shake the Branch… you gotta “leaf.”
Sky: Sad.
Branch: I know! (He and Sky grunt as the walk away from each other. Later, Branch climbs out the door to his bunker.)
Sky: Hey, neighbor. (He throws some bird seeds on his lawn.) I thought you made some good points about lawn care. I wanted to do my part. (Branch picks up one of the seeds.)
Branch: Well, this isn’t grass seed.
Sky: My mistake. Must’ve accidentally used birdseed mixed with rage enhancers. (He throws his bag of bird seeds to Branch.)
Branch: Huh? Oh. Birds?! (He sees some crows cawing and snarling. He screams as the birds fly to attack him. Sky is about to go inside his vacation pod and sees a green ball.)
Sky: Hm. (He pulls the ball and his pod shakes. A giant pile of balls flies out.)
Branch: Found those in my yard. Thought you’d want them back, neighbor. (Sky growls angrily. Later, Branch goes inside his bunker after grabbing firewood. His foot touches a rope that triggers a trap which is a horn that blares. Branch gasps in fright. He then sees a letter in the horn.) “Neighbor, don’t leave your hatch open while out gathering firewood. You never know who will try to get in.” (scoffs) Very clever, neighbor. (He picks up a box, puts it down and another horn blares.) Aah! (He falls back and a 3rd horn blares. Branch runs to his room and locks the door. At that moment, seven more horns blare and he screams. He goes to his bed and tries to cover his ears with his pillows, but the horns in them blare. He then picks up Gary.) Gary, protect me! (He presses a button and Gary makes a loud horn sound.) AAAAAAH! What has he done to you, my sweet boy?! (He becomes angry.) Too far, Sky. (At his vacation pod, Sky is sleeping in his bed. He soon smells something strange and finds Cooper sleeping under his blanket.)
Sky: AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! (He staggers back.)
Cooper: Hey, Sky! I must’ve fallen asleep. (Sky shudders in shock.) Oh! (He gives Sky a present.) Branch said to give you this. (Sky opens the present and finds Sky Jr. ripped in half.)
Sky: Sky Jr.?! (He falls out of his bed.) NOOOOOO!!! (His voice echoes throughout Troll Village and it scares some crows. (Sometime after that, he is hosting a funeral for Sky Jr. in the rain. We can see that he is wearing sunglasses.) He only ever touched my neck. But he touched all our hearts. (Sky Jr.’s coffin lowers into the ground.) He is survived by three bow-ties and a cravat. (He removes his sunglasses and a tear runs down his face.) Hello, Branch.
Branch: Are we done here, neighbor?
Sky: Yes, I’m leaving… leaving Troll Village altogether actually. In my search for peace, I only found war, so I’ll seek solitude out there in the forest, perhaps never to return. For your troubles. (He throws some cookies down to Sky Jr.’s coffin. Then he leaves. Later on, Branch is enjoying the quiet again and finishing his puzzle.)
Branch: Ah. This is the life, Gary. No music, no construction, no Sky. (He puts his finished puzzle on the wall with the other puzzles he finished.) Just you, me, and sweet silence. (Suddenly, loud banging starts, causing the puzzle pieces to fall down.) Huh? (He looks through the telescope and sees some angry Trolls along with an angry Poppy.)
Poppy: Branch, you better get out here and fix this right now! (She goes over to the upset Trolls.) Listen, I know that since Sky left, the factory isn’t able to produce as many party supplies.
Troll #1: My kid’s 10-and-a-half birthday is tomorrow, and they only have cakes for 10-and-3-8ths! (She shows a cake.)
Troll #2: And they have no streamers for my Distant Cousins Day bash!
Cooper: And I’m just here ‘cause I like shouting!
All: YEAH!
Poppy: Uh… (Branch drags her into his bunker and she screams.) Branch, no-one is managing Sky’s party shop. So, listen, you’re gonna bring Sky back so he can run his factory.
Branch: Or what?
Poppy: Or you have to run his factory.
Branch: Oh, blow up balloons and make party hats? Pfft. In my sleep. (He goes to Sky’s party factory.) All right, your new manager is here to save the day. I understand production has slowed down.
Construction Troll: Yeah. It’s a huge problem.
Branch: (chuckles) I’m sure it is.
Construction Troll: For starters, we can’t keep up with wrapping paper demand. What should we do?
Branch: Uh, make more. Next!
Worker Troll #4: (Holding out one cake with pink icing and the other with orange icing) Uh, which cake do you like better boss?
Branch: Uh, the one on the right.
Worker Troll #5: Your right or cake right?
Branch: Whatever. Next!
Worker Troll #6: Thoughts on our new bouncy balls?
Branch: Make them bouncy and ball-shaped. It’s literally that easy.
Construction Troll: Boss! We got a major dilemma on the wrapping paper line! (He and Branch see a worker struggling to put polka-dots on a wrap fast.) We’ve increased production, but now we can’t keep up!
Branch: Oh. Uh, OK. I guess we need some more hands. Uh, you! I need you over here now.
Worker Troll #7: But who will man the frosting hose?
Branch: If you can handle it, so can I.
Worker Troll #6: If you say so, boss. (He grunts and shows hose to Branch. Then he drops it and leaves. Branch catches the hose and it goes up into the air, spraying frosting all around the factory. Branch screams and holds on tight. Some workers end up with frosting on their faces. Branch grabs a wheel and it spins.)
Branch: WHOOOOAA! (He flies onto the conveyor belt and blue frosting is put on him. The workers put green star sprinkles and pink sprinkles on him. He goes up a hill and down a drop like he is on a rollercoaster. A machine sprays purple glitter on him. He yells as the machine starts go out of control.) Ah, frosting! (The machine explodes and the factory gets completely covered in frosting. Branch gets up and sees a picture of Sky.)
Construction Troll: You are no Sky Toronto. (The camera shifts to Sky in a depression and sitting by a lake. He now has a long beard and mustache.)
Branch: Sky! Hey, Sky. Jeez. Are you okay?
Sky: (Getting up) In light of Sky’s passing, I’ve stripped myself of all worldly comforts to power-grief. (He becomes shocked.) Sky Jr. is dead?! (He becomes angry.) I don’t accept it! I’m so mad! (He becomes sad.) Please let me tie him one last time. (He starts crying.) I’ve hit rock bottom. And I’ve moved on. (He snaps his fingers. A worker Troll appears with a leaf chair and he sits in it. Another worker Troll puts cucumbers over his eyes and takes out a cutter.)
Branch: Look, Sky, I came here to-
Sky: To ask me to come back, right? (The worker Troll cuts his beard and mustache.)
Branch: Wha-yeah, how did you-
Sky: It’s my business to know. Let me guess. You doubled the wrapping paper output, took a worker off the frosting line, then tried to fix it yourself, which gave you a new appreciation for what I do. (He winks and points his finger.)
Branch: What? But… what? (stammers) I…
Sky: There’s a gibberish again. You need to work on that. (Branch groans.) Well, I’ve done some soul-searching too. And I realize I encroached on your privacy. As such, I promise, whenever I use my vacation pod, I’ll go easy on the noise. Plus, this offer. (He gives Branch a card.)
Pop-up: An official Sky Toronto apology.
Branch: Thanks. And I’m not gonna write it down or anything, but I’m sorry too. And I really mean it.
Sky: Cheesy.
Branch: I know. (The worker Troll appears with a suitcase.)
Sky: Ah, there you are, Skytina. (The worker Troll opens a suitcase to reveal a new bow-tie. Then Sky puts it on.) Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a factory to run. (He puts on his sunglasses.) Get the chopper. (A chopper appears and he gets on.) Be well, Branch.
Branch: You too, neighbor. (sighs) Finally, the neighbor war is over. (As he walks, his foot touches another trap.) Huh? (10 horns blare loudly and he becomes enraged.) SKYYYYYY!!!
Category:Trolls: The Beat Goes On! transcripts
Category:Transcripts
Category:TBGO Season 2 episode transcripts