The Lil' Rascals

The Lil' Rascals is the twenty-fourth episode of Bikini Bottom Jenkins and the ninth episode of Season Two.
==Synopsis==
Old Man Walker wants to revisit his old days of being a Kelp Bed Kid, so he gets Old Man Jenkins to recruit the old cast, wherever they are now.
==Transcript==
(The episode opens with Old Man Walker entering his house. Kelpbed Kids merchandise covers his walls, and he looks at it and sighs.)
Walker: Oh, how I miss the old days. (slumps) Life just gets worse as you get older. You don't have any friends because they're all dead, your body aches like Neptune, it's just so… sad. (sighs) What's a man to do?
(Walker groans and sits in his rocking chair. He starts rocking back and forth when he hears a knock on the door)
Walker: Come in.
 
Jenkins: (entering) Hey there, Walker. (notices Walker looks sad) What's wrong, fella?
Walker: I wish I could go back to the old days. Back when I was a good ol Kelp Bed Kid.
Jenkins: Those days, huh? Those were the good times. Back when I didn't have to worry about dyin’. Back when everything was in black and white. Back when… oh, you get the idea.
Walker: What do you suggest I should do about it?
Jenkins: Hmm… I know! How about you get the gang back together? For old times sake?
Walker: (gets up) I can't do that on my own. My back's killing me. I'm too frail to do much of anything anymore. And that stupid Ajax kid is still egging my house!
(Maniacal laughter is heard outside)
Jenkins: I see what you mean. Say, what if I help you?
Walker: Oh, could you? That would be great for my back.
Jenkins: If my mind serves me correctly, I think I remember where they might be right now. I'll be back, this shouldn't take too long.
Walker: (as Jenkins leaves) Oh, thank you, thank you! Thank yo- (coughs and wheezes) oh, barnacles.
(Bubble transition to the Krusty Krab, where Mr. Krabs is inside his safe, cleaning his money)
Mr. Krabs: Money money this, money money that. Money will make my belly fat. OUGH!
Jenkins: (off-screen) Eugene?
Mr. Krabs: Oh no! An old friend of mine! Quick, hide! …oh, wait.
Jenkins: (off-screen) It’s very important!
Mr. Krabs: It’s the IRS! I can’t let them know I’m in here. (calling out) Um, no one’s home! Try again later!
Jenkins: Relax, I’m not the tax collector. (scoffs) I hate taxes. Besides, I’m just Old Man Jenkins.
Mr. Krabs: Waaaait, what do YOU want, Mr. Jenkins?
Jenkins: You remember the Kelp Bed Kids, right?
Mr. Krabs: Remember? Of course I remember, I was a part of them. I was Snappy. (snaps claws) I long for the younger days of me life to come back.
Jenkins: Well, this is your chance. If you get out of that safe and come with me, I’ll show ya.
Mr. Krabs: Alrighty, I will. On one condition.
Jenkins: (holds out a dollar bill) I already know what you want, Krabsy.
Mr. Krabs: (sniffing through the safe) MONEY! (bursts out) MONEY MONEY MONEY- (takes the money) MONEYYYY!
Jenkins: Well, that’s great. Follow me, Mr. K.
Mr. Krabs: (walking out with Jenkins) Oh please, call me Snappy.
(Bubble transition to Jenkins ringing the doorbell to Mrs. Puff’s house. She answers it)
Mrs. Puff: Old Man Jenkins? What do you want?
Jenkins: Hey there, Puffy. We’re having a Kelp Bed Kids reunion. Wanna join?
Mrs. Puff: Is my hubby gonna be there?
Jenkins: I just recruited him earlier-
Mrs. Puff: (jumps up) Hooray! (spins past Jenkins) I’m on my way!
Jenkins: But- but I- (sighs and follows Mrs. Puff) oh, forget it. At least I didn’t have to bribe anyone this time.
(Bubble transition to Jenkins walking over to the other side of town. He spots Granny Tentacles’ teapot house up ahead)
Jenkins: (groans) This’ll be the worst one to get. Granny Tentacles is a real grouch.
(Jenkins slowly arrives to Granny Tentacles’ house. His finger hesitates before it rings the doorbell.)
Granny Tentacles: (cheerfully as she opens the door) Hellloooo! (notices Jenkins and gets grumpy) Oh. It’s you.
Jenkins: Yes, ma’am. You remember the Kelp Bed Kids, right?
Granny Tentacles: Oh yeah, those fellas. Those were the days. (sighs) But now I have to deal with those… OTHER… Stars. (grumbles as steam comes out of her head)
Jenkins: Wellll I’m getting GrandPat next, he’s the last one I have to get. Oh yeah, do you wanna come to the reunion?
Granny Tentacles: A reunion?! Hot dog! (shakes Jenkins’ arm until it limps) You got yourself a deal, old man! I’ll go get my love!
Jenkins: That’s great. Wait, who’s your love?
(Granny Tentacles says nothing as she runs off to go get GrandPat)
Jenkins: (shakes head) This side of town, I tell ya. A bunch of wackos.
Squidina: (off-screen) Mom, why did you eat my uranium missile? That was supposed to be for the Patrick Show!
Patrick: (off-screen) A WHAT?!
Bunny: (off-screen) Oops, was that a missile? It had so much flavor in it!
Jenkins: Uh-oh… (runs off before the missile explodes in the distance)
Granny Tentacles: (deadpan expression) I hate neighbors.
(Bubble transition back to Walker’s house. Everyone is inside, having a party. Old fashioned music is playing, and several people are dancing and drinking)
Walker: Old Man Jenkins, I can't thank ya enough! This is the happiest I've been in years!
Jenkins: Anything for my (slaps Walker’s shoulder) old pal.
Walker: (rubs shoulder) Yep! I'm so glad we can finally reunite again.
Krabs: (dancing with Mrs. Puff) Well, Puffykins, how's my dancing coming along?
Mrs. Puff: Oh Snappy, I couldn't live another moment without you.
Jenkins: (drinks heavily)
Walker: You might wanna quit binge drinkin’, Jenkins. You're gonna pass out.
Jenkins: Oh please. (drinks) It’s the perfect way to drown away my sorrows. And possibly create some, but that's beside the point!
Walker: (sighs) Can’t tell ‘em anything anymore.
(Just them, maniacal laughter is again heard off-screen)
Walker: Not again…
Mrs. Puff: It’s that darned Ajax Magee, isn’t it?
Walker: Eeyup.
Mr. Krabs: He’s still eggin’ your house? How pathetic.
Walker: Petty, I know. But, we’re all too old to do something about it now.
Granny Tentacles: Nonsense! (gestures everyone to leave with her) Come with me.
Jenkins: So much for the party, I guess. (drinks)
Walker: (slaps drink out of Jenkins’ hand) Stop doing that!
Jenkins: Okay okay, fine. (Walker leaves, then he takes another drink) Ah, sweet relief.
(Cut to everyone in Granny Tentacles’ lair. The other Kelp Bed Kids are looking around, oohing and awing)
GrandPat: Oh hey I remember this place. It’s where me and Granny had steamy hot-
Granny Tentacles: Shhh! They must not know!
GrandPat: (blushes) Sorry, honey.
Granny Tentacles: (blushes, then shakes her head) So anyway, this here is my lair. I have looooads of weapons that we can use in here. (picks up a mace and swings it around, making the others duck) Like this mace, for example!
Walker: (whimpering) Please don’t kill me…
Granny Tentacles: (laughs) I’m not going to kill you. But I WILL kill that blasted Ajax, mark my words.
Walker: (gulps)
Granny Tentacles: Anyway, everyone grab a weapon!
(Walker grabs a broadsword, GrandPat grabs a laser gun, Mr. Krabs grabs a coin cannon, and Mrs. Puff grabs an entire boat)
Mr. Krabs: Whoa.
Mrs. Puff: I work out.
Mr. Krabs: (blushing as Mrs. Puff winks at her)
Granny Tentacles: (groans) Can we just get a move on? We have an old man to destroy.
Mr. Krabs: Oh, right. Heheh.
(Bubble transition back to Walker’s home. Ajax is seen outside, this time with some company. The Kelp Bed kids, with their new weapons, confront them)
Granny Tentacles: Who are these goons you got here?
Ajax: (laughing maniacally) They’re my new friends I made at the retirement home. And we’re all here to blow. You. Up! (laughs so hard he coughs)
Goon 1: This guy is pathetic.
Goon 2: I just wanted some prunes.
Ajax: And we all have BOMBS! Muhahahaha! We got these things from some random house. Looks like a teapot or something.
Granny Tentacles: …oh dear.
Mr. Krabs: What?
Granny Tentacles: I know those Stars. Knowing them, they probably have a bunch of bombs in their basement.
Mr. Krabs: Now why would some dumb stars have bombs?
Granny Tentacles: The squid one, she’s incredibly smart. Too smart.
GrandPat: My granddaughter!
Granny Tentacles: Yeahhh… her. Stupid show.
Ajax: Enough dialogue. It’s time to blow up you (dolphin chirps)s!
Mr. Krabs: Bad word number thirteen! Naughty!
Ajax: (chuckles) Oh, I’m a naughty, naughty boy. Believe me, I know.
Walker: We’ll get you once and for all! (brandishes sword)
Ajax: (giggles) That silly thing? It can’t do any dama-
(Walker goes up to Ajax and stabs him with his sword)
Ajax: Ouch! That… only slightly hurt. I think my arm’s bleeding now.
Goon 3: (sighs) This is getting boring. Let’s just get this over with.
Granny Tentacles: Okay, everyone. On the count of three, we attack. One… two… THREE!
(A giant montage of the two parties battling each other begins. Granny swings her mace and knocks back several goons. Some of them get back up, and Krabs hits them with his coin cannon, leaving indents all over their bodies as they lay down hurt)
Goon 2: (weakly) The agony… (passes out)
Ajax: Oh, come on! This shouldn’t be this difficult! (groans, holds up a bomb) Time to blow up in this (dolphin chirp!)
Mr. Krabs: That’s number 11!
(The montage continues. Ajax throws a bomb at the gang, who all run out of the way just in time. Some of the goons get blown up into oblivion. Ajax shakes his head as he holds up another bomb, but Mrs. Puff hurls her boat at him, paralyzing him)
Mrs. Puff: How does it feel to be BOATED?
Ajax: That doesn’t even make any sense!
Mrs. Puff: (sighs) You got me there, pal.
Ajax: I AM NOT YOUR PAL! I AM LITERALLY TRYING TO KILL YOU! GRAHHHH!
(As Ajax picks up a larger bomb, he throws it at the gang, but Mrs. Puff throws it back in his face, blowing up more of him and his goons)
Ajax: (rubbing his head) You have GOT to be kidding me. Am I like a cartoon villain or something?
Granny Tentacles: Yeah, you literally are.
Ajax: (getting up) But unlike cartoons, I am actually going to kill you all! (laughs evilly, then notices his goons are all gone) What?! What gives?
GrandPat: Looks like we blew them all up. Whoops.
Ajax: (groans heavily) I have one final bomb. And it’s a special, special one. (holds up a giant nuclear bomb) If this doesn’t blow any of you guys up, I’m giving up as the bad guy.
Granny Tentacles: Good (dolphin chirp) riddance. Also use some deodorant for once, I can smell you from all the way over here.
Ajax: Stinky to stun my enemies! Haha!
GrandPat: (yawns)
(As Ajax tosses the nuclear bomb, GrandPat shoots it with his laser gun. This causes it to blow up, as a live action explosion appears on screen. Back to reality, however, everyone is just mildly injured)
Ajax: …must’ve been a dud.
Mrs. Puff: (picking up Ajax and tossing him away) Off you go!
Ajax: I’ll get you next tiiiime! (falls in the distance) Or not.
Granny Tentacles: Finally. Stupid (dolphin chirp).
Mr. Krabs: You know I don’t like how you talk.
Granny Tentacles: I honestly don’t really care.
Jenkins: (opening the front door) Is the coast finally clear?
(Everyone else nods their heads as Jenkins gestures them to come inside)
Jenkins: Let’s end this party on a high note, shall we?
Mrs. Puff: Oh, I got this. I was a chorus kid.
(The episode ends with everyone covering their ears as Mrs. Puff sings an absurdly high note, breaking all of the house’s windows and eventually the screen itself)
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