The Chefsbane Cometh

is a Quest in Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn.
==Journal==
* You learn that Lord Lolorito, one of Ul'dah's most powerful men, has announced his intention to dine at the Bismarck. Apparently, the man is a self-styled food critic, notorious for using his influence to ruin restaurants that fail to satisfy his rarefied needs. In an unfortunate turn of events, Lyngsath has injured his hand, and it falls to you to represent the Bismarck in his stead. In order to learn more about your distinguished guest, the guildmaster recommends you speak with Diving Dove, a native of Ul'dah.
* You learn from Diving Dove that Lolorito's butler, a fellow by the name of Nonopesa, is presently at the Bismarck. Seek him out and endeavor to discover what manner of cuisine his master may be craving.
* For a blessing, Nonopesa turns out to be a personable fellow, and you learn from him that Lolorito currently has a hankering for a hearty meal of meat. As per the butler's recommendation, prepare a haunch of smoked raptor of the finest quality, and deliver it to him.
* Nonopesa is deeply impressed by your smoked raptor. You, in turn, are deeply impressed by his ability to judge food without taking a single bite. What was it that Diving Dove said about Ul'dahn cuisine...? At any rate, it would seem your cooking will satisfy even the exacting requirements of the great Lord Lolorito. Bear the glad tidings to Lyngsath.
* Nonopesa's high opinion of your food serves to put Lyngsath at ease. The guildmaster thanks you for safeguarding the future of the guild, and proceeds to liken you to his trusty left hand. Keep up your efforts, and you may yet become one of the realm's finest culinarians.
※The next culinarian quest will be available from Lyngsath upon reaching level 35.
==Objectives==
* Speak with Diving Dove.
* Speak with Nonopesa.
* Deliver a haunch of smoked raptor to Nonopesa.
* Speak with Lyngsath.
==Script==
script 	script
 	
Lyngsath 	Bollocks! Me 'and! 'Ow in the seven 'ells am I meant to cook with one bloody 'and!? Gah! Of all the godsdamned times I could've 'urt it, why'd it 'ave to be now!?
Lyngsath 	Forgive me language, lass/son. Don't worry─it ain't serious.
...Well, it is a bit serious, to tell the truth.
Lyngsath 	I've gone an' knackered me 'and tryin' to catch a fallin' crate, see. It'll 'eal an' all, but it 'urts like a bastard. Can't so much as scratch me arse with it, never mind 'old a skillet. Wouldn't be so bad, but we got usselves a bigwig comin' to dine today─one o' the most powerful men in Ul'dah!
Lyngsath 	Now, I've been in the business fer decades, an' I ain't no stranger to coddled dignitaries what whine about the color of the bloody crockery, an' 'ow there's too much parsley garnish on top o' their soup. But this ain't no ordinary coddled dignitary we're dealin' with.
Lyngsath 	This one fancies 'imself as a food critic, an' 'e's always out to find fault, real or not.
Lyngsath 	An' that ain't the worst of it. Owin' to 'is influence, 'e's driven more'n a few respectable establishments into the ground. Fer this 'e's earned 'imself the name o' “Chefsbane” in culinary circles.
Lyngsath 	Each time the man's dined at the Bismarck, I've personally done the cookin' so as to avert disaster.
Lyngsath 	Don't get me wrong─I've got complete trust in all me chefs, but if the Bismarck goes under, the guild goes with it. An' that ain't a burden I can put on just anyone's shoulders.
Lyngsath 	But this time, someone else's gonna 'ave to fill in fer me...an' I wants that someone to be you, [Player Name]. Ye've proven yerself more than capable, an' in 'igh-pressure situations besides. I'm confident ye won't let us down.
Lyngsath 	Ye'd do well to begin by talkin' with Divin' Dove. Bein' a native of Ul'dah, might be as she knows somethin' o' the Chefsba─I mean, Lord Lolorito.
 	
Diving Dove 	Aye, I'm aware of the situation. But don't panic─though the guildmaster is indisposed, all is not yet lost.
Diving Dove 	In case you're unfamiliar with our distinguished guest, he is the head of the East Aldenard Trading Company. Though you may not have heard that name before, you will almost certainly have heard of the many famous brands it owns, such as Eshtaime's Lapidaries and Sunsilk Tapestries.
Diving Dove 	Lord Lolorito's countless successes have made him the wealthiest man in Ul'dah─a place where wealth and influence are synonymous. It goes without saying that he has a seat on the Syndicate, the cabal that rules the sultanate. Ah, lest you wonder, Ul'dah is only notionally a sultanate these days...
Diving Dove 	Anyway, as is often the way with men of means, Lord Lolorito is a lover of fine cuisine. And as the guildmaster doubtless mentioned, he's made a name for himself as a ruthless food critic.
Diving Dove 	The man has a penchant for making life miserable for us chefs. Indeed, he never places an order, but demands instead that you “impress him.” And therein lies our first dilemma: what to serve?
Diving Dove 	Lest you think the fates unduly mischievous, I'm happy to report that the odds are not wholly stacked against us. It just so happens that Lolorito's butler, a fellow by the name of Nonopesa, is dining at the Bismarck at this very moment.
Diving Dove 	This is a golden chance to learn what manner of dish Lolorito craves. Go to Nonopesa on the terrace, and try to coax the information out of him. Good luck!
 	
Nonopesa 	I'm sorry? I think I may have misheard. Did you say that you would be preparing Lord Lolorito's meal? Well...this is rather unexpected. But if Master Lyngsath saw fit to entrust the task to you, then you must not be without skill.
Nonopesa 	Hm? You wish to know what my master desires to eat? Hah hah hah! Finally it occurs to someone to ask me that question!
Nonopesa 	It is my duty to see that my lord never wants for comfort, and naught pleases me more than to see Lord Lolorito in high spirits. As such, I should be glad to share with you what I know.
Nonopesa 	Shortly prior to arriving in Limsa Lominsa, my master spoke of being seized by a craving for a hearty meal of meat. Though he did not mention a specific dish, I happen to know that smoked raptor is a particular favorite of his.
Nonopesa 	Needless to say, a man of such refined taste as he would expect no less than the finest sample of the dish, made with only the finest ingredients. I hope this information serves you well.
Nonopesa 	Lord Lolorito is due to conclude his business negotiations presently, and will desire to take his meal thereafter. Once the smoked raptor is ready, pray bring it to me. I shall see it delivered to my master.
 	
Nonopesa 	Remember: Lord Lolorito will accept nothing less than the best. Your smoked raptor must represent the finest available ingredients, prepared with the utmost skill.
Nonopesa 	Ah, the smoked raptor is ready? Good. Now, I trust you won't object to an inspection. Lest you worry about your handiwork being defaced, my years serving Lord Lolorito have taught me how to taste with sight and smell alone.
Nonopesa 	By the gods... This raptor is sublime!
Nonopesa 	The marriage of cracked pepper and sun lemon begets an irresistible fragrance that perfectly complements the aroma of the meat.
Nonopesa 	The flavor is rounded out with the mellow fruitiness of olive oil, which also lends the shank a lustrous sheen that tantalizes the eye.
Nonopesa 	I have presided over Lord Lolorito's dining table for many years...
Nonopesa 	And I can say without reservation that this is the most delectable smoked raptor I have ever had the pleasure of not eating!
Nonopesa 	It is of little wonder that Master Lyngsath deemed you fit to cook in his stead─I doubt that even he could have delivered a better rendition of my master's favorite dish. You, madam/sir, are quite a culinarian.
Nonopesa 	...Ah, but I sense you are more relieved than flattered. Hardly surprising, I suppose. Much and more is said of my lord's “uncompromising” approach to cuisine.
Nonopesa 	While I will not refute the rumors, you may rest assured that the Bismarck has no cause to worry.
Nonopesa 	Now then, if you will excuse me, I must see my lord's meal delivered to him.
Nonopesa 	You may look forward to hearing his judgment anon─and entirely without trepidation, if my senses do not fail me. Pray send Master Lyngsath my compliments.
 	
Lyngsath 	Ye did it, [Player Name]! You impressed the pants off Lolorito's butler!
Lyngsath 	Nonopesa knows 'is master's tastes better'n 'is own, an' 'is approval's all the assurance I need. The guild's safe, an' it's all thanks to you!
Lyngsath 	Ye never cease to amaze me, [Player Name]. Ye came to us with nary any knowledge of cookin', an' now yer like a second left 'and!
Lyngsath 	...Well, that didn't come out right. What I meant to say was, yer as useful to me as the 'and I 'old me skillet with─summat no culinarian can do without.
Lyngsath 	Ye've got it in ye to be one o' the finest chefs in the realm, an' I would see ye fulfill yer potential. Promise me ye'll keep at yer cookin'.
Quest complete.	Quest complete.
Category:Disciple of the Hand Quests in Final Fantasy XIV