Spamton

Spamton, full name Spamton G. Spamton, is a Darkner from the Cyber World. He is initially encountered in Cyber City, where he is fought as a miniboss. He is likely based on spam emails and adverts.
If Kris helps him enter the Queen's Mansion's basement (either through the LoadedDisk or freezing Berdly), he transforms into Spamton NEO, which serves as Chapter 2's bonus boss on a normal route and the main antagonist and final boss of the Chapter 2 Snowgrave Route. As a bonus boss, he holds one of the Shadow Crystals.
== Shop ==
After his battle, he appears as a shopkeeper in the Trash Zone. His shop is unusual in that his items are not what they appear, and their prices fluctuate rapidly while looking at them. He is also the only shopkeeper that the party cannot sell items to, with the "SELL" option being replaced with "BUYMORE!!" His wares are:
* KeyGen for 0-49030 Kromer/D$
* S.POISON for 50-150 Kromer/D$ (sold as "S. POTION")
* Broken Sword for 50-150 Kromer/D$ (sold as "THE BIG ONE")
* Frayed Bowtie for 50-150 Kromer/D$ (sold as "BSHOT BOWTIE")
== Profile ==
=== Appearance ===
Spamton appears as a diminutive puppet and ex-Addison that wears yellow and pink glasses that sometimes change colors and a long-sleeved black V-neck shirt, with black hair that is slicked back, appearing similar to a pompadour. 
After becoming Spamton NEO, Spamton assumes the form of the machine he inhabits. The body of this form looks like a disheveled Mettaton NEO with a gaudy pink and yellow color scheme, and a laser cannon mounted onto his hand. Countless green wires suspend him in the air. His pink and yellow glass colors swap places. He also grows bat wings, one side being green, lilac, and purple, the other being yellow, pink, and magenta, and has teal-green and grey thumbs.
Swatch mentions that many people have failed to imitate his look, and some people have even gone so far as to impersonate him. Spamton's slick black hair, multicolored glasses, pointy white face and black suit are noticeably similar to Swatch's outfit, and Spamton admits to it during a live Q&A during the Spamton Sweepstakes.
Spamton's design seems to be based on a number of popular depictions of puppets, having the face and style of dress seen on classic ventriloquist dummies with a (nonlengthening) nose similar to Pinocchio's. This is also hinted at in his Spamton NEO form when he refers to himself as a puppet, and with the song "A Real Boy!"
Spamton has the ability to increase the size of his head. In his NEO form, his head is constantly larger than usual.
=== Personality ===
Spamton was once a natural salesman, always willing to cut a deal. While he still bears a shadow of these traits, his deals are now often nonsensical or violent. He claims that he became a salesman not for the money, but for the freedom to make his own deals. However, he still attempts to scam Kris for money (which he refers to as "Kromer") at every opportunity. His speech patterns are similar to typical obfuscated spam email text, with many words replaced with non sequitur variants in square brackets that could imply incorrectly-applied mail merge variables or hyperlinks, or various voice glitches. 
In much of his dialogue, he seems desperate and mentally unwell, seemingly projecting himself onto Kris, contradicting himself, and saying things which make little sense, without warning. This mental instability seems to clear up briefly after fighting him in his NEO form, as he wishes Kris success with their journey without using broken English.
Spamton consistently spells "generosity" as "genorisity," "guarantee" as "guaranttee," and "special" as "specil," with an exception for the latter at the end of the Spamton NEO battle after snapping all the wires.
== Main Story ==
=== History ===
Some time before Kris and Susie entered the Cyber World, Spamton existed as an unsuccessful spam email Addison, overlooked by Lightners and never able to catch a break. Despite his lack of success, he always proclaimed to his fellow Addisons that he would be a "big shot" one day.
Desperate, Spamton began to look for any way to become more popular. Eventually, he came into contact via phone with someone who could help him, and suddenly he began to be wildly successful. From that point on, Spamton was "on the phone all the time," being aided by an unknown person. His fellow Addisons became jealous of him for his sudden success, and stopped going out with him. His success landed him his own room at the Queen's Mansion, and he began to brag more and more about his deals, ranging from TV commercials to cars.
Then, as sudden as his success was, it came crashing down. The stranger helping Spamton vanished, and all his sales went with them. Desperate, Spamton started spending all of his time "praying" in the basement, where he found a "crystal in [an] old machine" and became obsessed with an "artifact" (the artifact either being the machine or the crystal itself). This machine was created by an unknown Lightner with the help of Swatch and was a digital visualization of their hopes and dreams. However, those dreams never came to be, and the machine was abandoned in the basement with the rest of the corrupted data.
With nothing left, Spamton was to be evicted from the Queen's mansion. The day of his eviction, one of the Addisons went to visit Spamton, but found he had already left. Spamton had left his phone hanging off the handle. Spamton presumably left in the middle of a conversation, as the Addison could hear someone on the other end, but after putting the phone to their ear it only made "garbage noise." Likewise, Kris's Cell Phone only makes garbage noise when used in the Dark World.
Abandoned by all of his friends, Spamton was reduced to living in a dumpster in a Cyber City alleyway. Despite his fall from grace, the Color Cafe in Queen's Mansion continued to sell his trademark bowtie, albeit with the brand name cut off.
At some point, someone (presumed to be Spamton) attempted to impersonate Swatch by mimicking his monochrome suit and colored glasses, in order to obtain something (presumed to be the NEO machine). Additionally, somebody (presumed to be Spamton) attempted to commission Sweet Cap'n Cakes to sneak into the Queen's Mansion (presumably to grant him access to the machine), but they declined; - Sweet Cap'n Cakes talking about "Junk Work" Spamton later convinces Kris to do likewise.
After asking him about friends, he brings up an individual named Mike. When talking about Mike, Spamton tells Kris not to trust what they hear on TV because "THE MAN'S A CRIMINAL." Spamton also exclaims "ARE YOU GETTING ALL THIS [Mike]!?" at the end of his NEO fight if he is defeated violently, implying Mike may have recorded for Spamton in some capacity in the past.
=== Chapter 2 ===
==== Normal Route ====
Spamton is first encountered by Kris in Cyber City, where Kris seemingly disturbs the garbage container in which Spamton is residing. After a short interaction, Spamton engages Kris in combat as he continues attempting to convince them to accept his "deal."
Later, if Spamton was defeated through mercy, he can be seen again in a shop to the left of the Trash Zone. After Kris accepts yet another deal, he tasks Kris with bringing him an Empty Disk located in a basement in the Queen's Mansion. After purchasing a KeyGen from Spamton, Kris can retrieve the EmptyDisk from the machine in the dilapidated basement. Upon returning to Spamton's shop, Spamton proposes his final deal to Kris: transmitting Spamton through the EmptyDisk and returning it to the machine in the basement.
After Kris places the LoadedDisk back into the machine, Spamton transforms into Spamton NEO, much to his delight and excitement, but is horrified to see that his new form is held up by literal puppet strings. He attacks Kris in an attempt to obtain their SOUL, believing that it is the key to earning his "freedom." Before he can, however, Susie and Ralsei enter the room, and Susie interrupts him by using her Rude Buster spell to knock him out of the way, leading Spamton NEO to launch the three into carts, and battle the party for all of their SOULs.
Spamton NEO can be defeated either by fighting or by cutting the wires controlling him. If he is defeated by fighting, he attempts to continue the fight by turning into "Spamton EX," but his gravely damaged body explodes as he attempts to transform. If the party cuts all of his wires until one remains, Spamton NEO realizes that Kris is trying to free him in spite of his efforts to kill them. He dances gleefully and thanks them, asking them to cut the last wire, only for him to helplessly fall to the ground without any strings to hold him up.
No matter the method, once he is defeated, Spamton returns to his normal form, becomes calm and lucid, and starts speaking normally. He laments how he could not become anything more than a puppet, but compliments the party's strength and wishes them well. He then offers himself to the party, transforming into either a Dealmaker (when defeated by cutting his wires) or a Puppet Scarf (when defeated by fighting). Kris also receives a Shadow Crystal.
After defeating Spamton NEO, several Addisons are seen near his shop where they talk about Spamton, their relationship with him, and his backstory.
==== Snowgrave Route ====
In the Snowgrave Route, after all enemies in the area have been frozen by Noelle, Spamton sells Kris the Thorn Ring from a dumpster, presumably where he lives. He tells the party how many enemies are left before he sells the Thorn Ring, which must be bought for 1997 Kromer in order to proceed on the route. He then takes advantage of the fleeing enemies to take over Queen's Mansion, which he fills with Pipis. At the top of the Mansion, after bypassing Queen, Kris fights Spamton NEO as the final boss of the route, Spamton explaining that sealing the fountain would ruin his rise to glory. Towards the end of the battle, Spamton massively boosts his defense, forcing Kris and the player to call their allies for help. Kris calls Ralsei and Susie for help twice each, but they do not respond. The player then calls Noelle, who responds and freezes Spamton. As in the normal route, a Puppet Scarf and a Shadow Crystal are added to the inventory for beating him in this route.
== In Battle ==
=== Attacks ===
; Spamton 
* Money Vacuum: Spamton's face expands and his mouth opens as he inhales dollar signs into his mouth and changes the box's shape. The SOUL gets dragged to the right as well.
* Minitons: Spamton's face expands and releases several miniature copies of himself that run along the top and bottom parts of the box. When one gets close to the SOUL, it jumps up in an attempt to attack it.
* Word Bullets: Spamton's face expands and releases strings of letters that enlarge as they get closer to the other side of the box. The words either move in a sine wave pattern or up or down. The words that are spelt out include:
** $VALUES$
*** $VAULES$ (rarely)
** $$DEALS$
** $"CHEAP"
** $$49.998
** $$REAL$$
** $PRICES$
** BARGAIN$
; Spamton NEO
Spamton NEO introduces the yellow SOUL mechanic. Similar to the yellow SOUL Mode in Undertale, this allows the SOUL to shoot bullets at certain obstacles. The SOUL can also charge the bullets for a "big shot."
* Flying Heads: Four copies of Spamton's head launch at the SOUL one lane at the time. These heads can be destroyed. If not destroyed, they launch bullets at the SOUL as they continue onward. When a head is destroyed, it will provide 1.3 (about 0.5%) TP.
** From the second time and on, the copies of Spamton's head come from multiple directions, while Spamton NEO also fires large bullets with his arm cannon.
* Spam Mail: Trucks carrying towers of mail, destructible Spamton heads and sometimes bombs drive towards the SOUL.
** From the second time and on this attack is used, the trucks go faster and more frequently.
** After using the difficult variant of this attack, he loops back to the difficult Flying Heads attack. This continues until he reaches 30% HP or 70% MERCY.
* Chained Heart: Spamton NEO releases a heart chained to his chest. This heart has Spamton NEO's face on it. He then launches it back and forth, releasing an array of diamond bullets with it. The heart will exist for a long time (if it is not shot, it can exist for 24 seconds), and shots can reduce its existing time and destroy the heart. When the heart is destroyed in a normal route, his Mercy meter increases by 3% if he has not received any damage. If he has received damage or in the Snowgrave Route, destroying the heart deals 3% damage to him. This cannot completely fill the Mercy meter or completely drain his HP, though; he will always be left with a maximum of 99% Mercy or a minimum of 1 HP if damaged in this way. 
** The second time Spamton NEO uses this attack, the heart moves back and forth more rapidly, shoots more frequently and with an increased angle deviation.
** From the third time and on, smaller hearts that are optional to destroy are added. They are destroyed when the primary heart is destroyed. This is triggered immediately when and only when Spamton NEO's HP is below 30% or his MERCY is over 70%.
** When enraged, this attack has a random angle deviation for the bullets, and the heart has more health to accommodate for the increased damage output from the SOUL.
* A Call For You: Spamton NEO fires blue, bouncing Pipis towards the SOUL. When one reaches contact with the box, an array of tiny Spamton heads is launched at the SOUL at a very fast pace. The Pipis give 3 TP when destroyed (approximately 1-2% TP in tension bar; internally, TP are stored as a value capped at 250 instead of as a percentage). 
** From the second time and on this attack is used, Spamton NEO fires two Pipis at once each time.
* Gripping Phones: Phones grip onto the outer edges of the box as a Spamton head approaches, shooting large, exploding bullets. Shooting the head with a big shot pushes it backward.
** If the SOUL takes damage against the standard version of this attack, all subsequent times the attack is used, the phones launch waves from them and move up and down the board, regardless of the Spamton head's position. The Spamton head's bullets also no longer explode. If the SOUL does not take damage against the standard attack, it is used again the next time and so on until damage is taken, at which point all further uses are the harder variation.
** When enraged, the "phone wave" variation is used immediately when this attack first appears, and the standard version is used the second time. As before, if no damage is taken, the standard version continues to be used.
* Eyes, Nose, and Mouth: A face appears on a separate box, where the SOUL is unable to enter. The eyes, nose and mouth each launch different projectiles and can be destroyed. Each part has 16 HP, normal shot deals 1 HP and big shot deals 4. When one part is destroyed, it does not re-appear the next time the attack is performed. If only one part remains, its attacks become harder to avoid. Once all three parts are destroyed, nothing happens when the attack is used, and after that, all three parts are restored.
** When enraged, the parts will all have more health to accommodate for the increased damage output.
* A Call For Me: Spamton NEO receives a call that surprises him with several miniature copies of his head that are shot out of the phone rapidly in his face. This does nothing and acts as a free turn.
* Power of NEO: After the area around the box becomes black, a large Spamton NEO appears to the right of the screen and begins by using an attack similar to the Inhale attack from his first fight, only that the right Bullet Board fully connects to his mouth this time around. After this, he launches several large bullets portraying his face before launching a bullet as tall as the box that explodes and ends the attack. This attack is triggered immediately if Spamton NEO's HP reaches 10% or below or his MERCY reaches 90% or above. Since version v1.08, this produces a visual smoke effect at the corners of the screen bearing Spamton's face. Shooting at Spamton's face enough times advances to the next phase of the attack more quickly. Similarly to the Chained Heart attack, 5% is added to the Mercy meter at the end of the attack if no damage has been dealt to Spamton on a normal route. Otherwise, 5% damage is dealt. Just as with the Chained Heart move, this cannot end the battle.
* Pipis Explosion: Exclusive to the Snowgrave Route, after Spamton NEO raises his defense, and is the only attack used since then. Three Pipis appear on the right side of the screen and explode. The small Spamton heads can be destroyed, however.
Spamton NEO attacks in the following order before either his HP reaches 30% or his MERCY reaches 70%:
# Flying Heads I
# Spam Mail I
# Chained Heart I
# A Call For You I
# Gripping Phones
# Eyes, Nose and Mouth
# Chained Heart II
If he does not reach either of those thresholds after this sequence, he uses the following attacks in a fixed order on loop:
# Flying Heads II
# Eyes, Nose and Mouth
# Gripping Phones
# A Call For You II
# Spam Mail II
Once he does reach 30% HP or 70% MERCY, he uses these attacks:
# Chained Heart III
# A Call For Me
# Power of Neo
If Spamton NEO reaches 10% HP or 90% MERCY on a normal route and has not already used Power of Neo, he will immediately do so. After using Power of Neo in either occasion, he will use the following attacks on loop:
# Chained Heart III
# Eyes, Nose and Mouth
# Power of Neo
In the Snowgrave Route, after reaching 10% HP, Spamton NEO will use Pipis Explosion every turn for the rest of the battle.
=== Strategy ===
; Spamton
To spare Spamton, one has to engage in his deals without giving him money. The correct options are:
* TELL ME MORE
* DON'T GIVE
* TAKE DEAL
* DON'T BUY
* REFUSE
* YES DEAL (Happens immediately after correctly selecting a fifth time, selecting "NO DEAL" fails and repeats the prompt)
The Minitons attack can be evaded by moving left and right in the middle of the Bullet Board.
; Spamton NEO
If aiming to defeat Spamton NEO through ACTing, it should be noted that the following actions increase his mercy:
* Snap, S-Action, and R-Action each increase mercy by 2%.
** If a party member snaps when the rest of the party is downed, they "snap desperately" and instead increase mercy by 4%. Due to a glitch, this does not happen if Ralsei is the last party member standing prior to version v1.08.
* Snap All increases mercy by 7%.
* Destroying the heart in the Chained Heart attack increases mercy by 3% if no damage has been dealt to Spamton NEO on a normal route.
* The Power of NEO "Final attack" increases mercy by 5% if no damage has been dealt on a normal route.
If using ACT, getting as many "Snap All" commands as possible is helpful, as it consistently contributes 7% to the Mercy bar. However, it is not necessarily the most labor-saving strategy, especially if all three characters suffer damage. It is helpful to have Kris and Susie focus on snapping Spamton's strings while Ralsei is used for healing. If extra TP is needed, Susie or Kris can defend instead.
Both Susie and Ralsei gain a unique ACT in this fight: Susie's Supercharge decreases the time it takes to charge a big shot (and increases the shot's speed), and Ralsei's FluffyGuard summons two fluff ball shields that orbit the SOUL. Pressing "[CANCEL]" stops the fluff balls from orbiting. 
Using items with the Cat/Puppet element gives increased defense towards some of Spamton NEO's attacks, such as the Mannequin and Frayed Bowtie.
If played using a keyboard, since both "[CONFIRM]" and "[Enter]" can be used for firing shots, holding one key while pressing and releasing the other key allows continuous firing of Big Shots without discharging once charged, which would significantly reduce the difficulty of the fight.
However, starting in v1.06, using this exploit more than 5 times in a battle causes Spamton NEO to become "angry," his face fuming and turning red. While angry, damage done by Spamton NEO's attacks is greatly increased. Each cheated shot increases Spamton's AT by 0.5, capping at 26. The damage increase from this is lowered each time the player gets a Game Over. In v1.05, in preparation for this feature, the game started tracking how many times the exploit was used using a variable named "funnycheat." If this exploit is used during the introduction of the yellow SOUL, the rage mechanic is reset when the actual battle begins. As of v1.07, alongside increasing damage, the properties of certain attacks are altered when Spamton NEO is enraged, attacks are brought out earlier in the fight, and any health-based attacks (such as Chained Heart) have higher health than usual, which is called "hellmode" in code. 
 Mechanics about "funnycheat"
Number of deaths to Spamton NEO	AT increase per cheated shot 	Max AT 	Shots required to cap AT 	"Hell Mode" activated?
0 or 1 	0.5 	26 	31 	Yes
2 or 3 	0.25 	22 	41 	Yes
4 or 5 	0.1 	18 	55 	No
≥6 and ≤9 	0.04 	15 	55 	No
≥10 	"Angry mode" becomes invalid.	"Angry mode" becomes invalid.	"Angry mode" becomes invalid.	"Angry mode" becomes invalid.
In the Snowgrave Route, after Spamton NEO's defense raises, fighting him cannot lower his HP under 6% and Kris must ACT 5 times to end the battle.
=== Quotes ===
==== Pre-Battle ====
; Spamton
* HEY      EVERY      !! IT'S ME!!!
* EV3RY  BUDDY  'S FAVORITE [[Number 1 Rated Salesman1997]]
* SPAMT 
* SPAMTON G. SPAMTON!!
* WOAH!! IF IT ISN"T A...
* LIGHT nER! HEY-HE Y HEY!!!
* LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE [[All Alone On A Late Night?]]
* ALL YOUR FRIENDS, [[Abandoned you for the slime]] YOU ARE?
* SALES, GONE DOWN THE [[Drain]] [[Drain]]??
* LIVING IN A GODDAMN GARBAGE CAN???
* WELL HAVE I GOT A [[Specil Deal]] FOR LONELY [[Hearts]] LIKE YOU!!
* IF YOU'VE [[Lost Control Of Your Life]]
* THEN YOU JUST GOTTA GRAB IT BY THE [[Silly Strings]]
* WHY BE THE [[Little Sponge]] WHO HATES ITS [[$4.99]] LIFE
* WHEN YOU CAN BE A
* [[BIG SHOT!!!]]
* [[BIG SHOT!!!!]]
* [[BIG SHOT!!!!!]]
* THAT'S RIGHT!! NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A [[BIG SHOT]]!!
* AND I HAVE JUST.
* THE THING.
* YOU NEED.
* THAT'S
* [[Hyperlink Blocked]].
* YOU WANT IT. YOU WANT [[Hyperlink Blocked]], DON'T YOU.
* WELL HAVE I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU!!
* ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS SHOW ME.
* YOUR [[HeartShapedObject]].
* YOU'RE  LIGHT neR< AREN'T YOU?
* YOU'VE GOT THE [[LIGHT.]] WHY DON'T YOU [[Show it off?]]
* HAEAHAEAHAEAHAEAH!!
; Spamton NEO
;; Normal Route
* HOLY [[Cungadero]] DO I FEEL GOOD ...
* HERE I AM!! KRIS!!
* BIG
* BIG,
* [[BIGGER AND BETTER THAN EVER]]
* HA HA HA ... THIS POWER IS
* FREEDOM.
* I WON'T HAVE TO BE JUST A PUPPET ANY MORE!!!!
* ...
* OR... so... I... thought.
* WHAT ARE THESE STRINGS!? WHY AM I NOT [BIG] ENOUGH!? It's still DARK... SO DARK!
* KRIS.
* KRIS. KRIS. KRIS.
* THAT'S RIGHT. YOU. I NEED YOU.
* TO BE BIG. WITH ME.
* VERY    VERY     BIG
* SO BIG WE'LL STAND UP TALL AND SEE PAST THE DARK
* STAND UP WITH OUR HEADS IN THE CLOUDS AND LOOK INTO
* H E A V E N
* I JUST NEED THAT LITTLE,
* [[SOUL]] Y O U HAVE
* [Susie] Kris!
* [Susie] The hell was that weirdo!?
* [Ralsei] Kris, we were worried about you, so...
* KRIS!!! YOU HAVE [Friends]!?
* WHY DON'T YOU TELL THEM ABOUT MY [3 for One Specil]!
* TODAY, THE WHOLE FAMILY CAN TAKE A LITTLE [Ride Around Town]...
* [Attention Customers! Clean up on Aisle 3!]
* SOMEONE LEFT [There] SOULS, [Lyeing Around......]
* Kris!?!? WAS THAT A [BIG SHOT] JUST NOW!?
* WOW!!! I'M SO [Proud] OF YOU, I COULD [Killed] YOU!
* [Heaven], are you WATCHING?
* IT'S TIME TO MAKE A VERY [Specil] DEAL...
;; Snowgrave Route
* [Narrator] (It was as if your very SOUL was glowing...)
* NOT!!!
* LET ME SAY
* LET ME SAY [Thanks ]
* THANKS TO YOUR [Total Jackass stunts] I HAVE [Becomed] NEO.
* AND NOW IT'S MY [Mansion]! MY [City] MY [World]!
* SO WHY ARE YOU [Stealing] THE [Fountain]!?
* TO [$!$!] ME OVER RIGHT AT THE [Good part]!? WHAT ARE YOU, A [Gameshow Host]!?
* AH, KID, FORGET IT. I'M AN [HonestMan].
* I'LL LET YOU [Pay] YOUR WAY OUT OF THIS ONE!!
* [Pay]...
* WITH YOUR [Rapidly-Shrinking] LIFE!!!
* [Unused]
** HOLY [[Cungadero]] DO I FEEL GOOD ...
==== Battle ====
; Spamton
* ENL4RGE Yourself [Neutral, before using Word Bullets, does not repeat]
* TRANSMIT KROMER [Neutral, before using Money Vacuum, does not repeat]
* MEET LOCAL SINGLES STRAIGHT FROM [My] [Neutral, before using Minitons, does not repeat]
* [Press F1 For] HELP [Neutral, does not repeat]
* Get Big and WIN [W1ld Pr1zes!] [Neutral]
* HELP [Neutral]
* [Deal #1]
** HEY HEY HEY! I'VE NEVER SEEN A [HeartShapedObject] LIKE THAT BEFORE!! [First Read]
*** MY EYES ARE [[Burning]] LIKE [[DVDs of ANY movie at Half-pr1ce!]]
*** I HAVE A VERY SPECIL [Deal] FOR YOU KID!
** WRONG ANSWER!!! WRONG!!! WRONG!!! WRONG!!! TRY AGAIN!!! [NOT INTERESTED]
** KID!!! IN BUSINESS YOU NEED TO SAY YOU'RE INTERESTED!!! [Subsequent Reads]
** THAT'S THE ATTITUDE YOU LITTLE [Slime]! [TELL ME MORE]
*** DEALS LIKE THIS ONLY COME ONCE IN YOUR [[Ant-sized]] [[Rapidly-shrinking]] LIFE!!
* [Deal #2]
** BELIEVE IT OR          !! [First Read]
*** I USED TO be A BIG SHOT. THE BIGGEST!!! BUT NOW...
*** I NEED A LITTLE [[Genorisity]]
** YUM YUM. DELICIS KROMER. [GIVE MONEY]
*** DID YOU HAVE AN YMORE?
** YUM YUM I NEED A LITTLE MORE [Genorisity] [Subsequent Reads]
** THAT'S RIGHT AND I DON'T MEAN [Money]!!! [DON'T GIVE]
*** I'M A SALESMAN   , I WAS NEVER IN IT FOR THE MONEY!!!
* [Deal #3]
** I WAS ONLY EVER IN IT FOR [First Read]
*** THE [Freedom].
*** TO MAKE YOUR OWN [Deals] TO CALL YOUR OWN [Shots]
*** AND SOMETIMES IN THE MORNING, A LITTLE
*** [Hyperlink Blocked]
*** SOUNDS GOOD. DOESN;T IT?KID?
*** DON'T YOU W4NT TO BE JUST LIKE YOUR OLD PAL SPAMTON????
*** TAKE THE DE4L.
** DEAL OR NO DEAL, THAT'S THE TV SHOW [DON'T TAKE DEAL]
*** WHERE THE PEOPLE WHO DON'T TAKE THE DEAL
*** GET FILLED WITH BULLETS FIRED FROM THE HOST'S MOUTH!!!
** TAKE THE DEAL YOU LITTLE [Sponge] [Subsequent Reads]
** NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING AB04T! YOU GOT [Guts] KID!! [TAKE DEAL]
*** THAT's [[Discomfort And Abdominal Pain]] IN MY [[Guts]]!!
* [Deal #4]
** DONT WORRY KID I WILL GIVE YOU [Deal Insurance] [First Read]
*** ONLY FOR THE LOW, LOW PRICE OF 1000 KROMER.
*** AN AWESOME PRICE.! AN ABSOLUTELY [[Terrifying]] PRICE
*** PRICES SO LOW, EVERYONE I KNOW IS [[Dead]]!!!
** YUM YUM. DELICIS KROMER. [BUY INSURANCE]
*** DID YOU HAVE AN YMORE?
** YUM YUM DID YOU WANT SOME MORE INSURANCE? [Subsequent Reads]
** WHAT!? YOU DOn'T HAVE ENOUGH [Wacky Stacks]!? [DON'T BUY]
*** Kid, you're [Killing] me! HAHAHA!! HAHAHA!!!
*** PLEASE STOP [Killing] ME I WILL GIVE Y OU ANOTHER DEAL.
* [Deal #5]
** DON'T WORRY KIDS I'M AN [HonestMan] [First Read]
*** I JUST NEED YOUR [Account Details] AND THE [Number on theB4ck]!
*** THEN YOU CAN ENJ0Y 1000 Fr3e KROmer
** YUM YUM GREAT DEAL KID!! [GIVE ACCOUNT ACCESS]
*** YOUR A BIGSHOT!! SAVING THE WORLD!!
** YUM YUM DID YOU HAVE ANY MORE ACCOUNTS? [Subsequent Reads]
** WHAT!?!? YOU DON"T NEED IT!?!? [REFUSE]
*** THAT'S A REAL BIGSHOT MOVE KID!!! YOU'RE LIKE ME...
*** [Desperate]
*** BUT WE KNOW WHAT WE WANT, DON'T WE!?
*** W1LD PR1ZES, HOTSINGLE, 100 CUSTOMER, AND MOST OF ALL...
*** [Hyperlink Blocked].
*** WILL YOU TAKE THE FINAL DEAL!?
*** REMEMBER... THIS IS UP TO YOU! I WOn'T FORCE YOU.
* [Final choice]
** WRONG [NO DEAL]
** THEN A DEAL'S A DEAL!!! [YES DEAL]
*** PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU KID!!!
; Spamton NEO
;; Any Route
* WHAT!? [A Call For You #1]
** WHAT? ARE YOU SERIOUS!?
** ... IT'S FOR YOU.
* WHAT!? [A Call For Me]
** IT'S FOR ME!?
* CAN A [Little Sponge] DO THIS? [Neutral]
** GO [Ga-Ga] AND [Die]
* [Clown]!? NO!!! I FEEL SICK!!! [Neutral]
* [The Smooth Taste Of] NEO [Neutral]
* THE [@$@!] TASTE OF SPAMTON [Neutral]
* DON'T YOU WANNA BE A BIG SHOT? [Neutral]
* [BreaKing] and [CracKing] [Neutral]
;; Normal Route
* KRIS! ISN'T THIS [Body] JUST [Heaven]LY!? [Flying Heads I]
** 3X THE [Fire]POWER. 2X THE [Water]POWER. AND BEST OF ALL, FLYING [Heads]!
* WE'LL TURN THOSE [Schmoes] AND [Daves] INTO [Rosen Graves] [Spam Mail I]
** THOSE [Cathode Screens] INTO [Cathode Screams]
* KRIS, DON'T YOU WANNA BE [Part] OF MY BEAUTIFUL [Heart]?! [Chained Heart I]
** OR... DID YOU NEED A LITTLE [Specil Tour]?
* ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS [Big.] [A Call For You I]
** THEN WE'LL BE THE ONES MAKING THE [Calls], KRIS!
* IT'S CALLING, KRIS... MY [Heart]... MY [Hands]... [Gripping Phones #1]
* KRIS! CAN YOU REALLY LOOK IN MY [Eyes] AND SAY NO!? [Eyes, Nose and Mouth #1, if Spamton is above 30% HP or below 70% MERCY]
** LOOK IN MY [Eyes] LOOK IN MY [Nose] LOOK IN MY [Mouth]
* I CAN'T STAND IT!!! I THINK I'M GONNA HAVE A [HeartAttack]! [Chained Heart II]
* KRIS, I'LL EVEN GIVE YOU A [Free Value] [Flying Heads II #1]
** [Die Now] AND I'LL THROW IN [50] [Bullets] FOR FREE!
* KRIS. IF YOU GIVE ME THAT [Soul] I WILL GIVE YOU EVERYTHING I HAVE. [Eyes, Nose and Mouth #2, if Spamton is above 30% HP or below 70% MERCY]
** I WILL GIVE YOU [3 Easy Payments of $9.99!]
* [Friends]!? KRIS!? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!? [Gripping Phones #2]
** YOU DON'T NEED [Friends]!!
** I CAN MAKE MY HANDS INTO PHONES!!!
* DON'T YOU WANNA HELP YOUR OLD PAL SPAMTON? [A Call For You II #1]
** KRIS!! THINK! WHAT ARE MY [Eggs] GOING TO DO!?
* BUT KRIS, IF YOU REFUSE. THAT'S YOUR CHOICE. I CAN'T FORCE YOU. [Spam Mail II #1]
** I CAN ONLY [Kill] YOU [50-percent faster than similar products] OR [No Money Back!]
* KRIS!!! TAKE THE DEAL!!! TAKE IT!!! [Chained Heart III #1]
** DO YOU WANNA BE A [Heart] ON A [Chain] YOUR WHOLE LIFE!?
* OR... DID YOU WANT TO BE... [A Call For Me]
** Did you wanna be...
* KRIS... I WON'T FORCE YOU. I CAN'T. I CAN'T FORCE YOU. [Power of NEO #1]
** BUT JUST LOOK, KRIS. LOOK AT THE [Power of NEO] AND ASK YOURSELF...
** WELL, DON'T YOU?
** DON'T YOU WANNA BE A [Big Shot]!?
* WAIT!! [$!?!] THE PRESSES! [Spared]
** MY... MY [Wires]... THEY'RE ALMOST [Gone]!?
** KRIS... YOU... YOU'RE [Gifting] ME MY [Freedom]?!
** KRIS... AFTER EVERYTHING I DID TO YOU...!?
** AFTER ALL THE [Unforgettable D3als] [Free KROMER] I GAVE YOU
** YOU'RE FINALLY REPAYING MY [Genorisity]!?
** KRIS!!! I UNDERSTAND NOW!! THE GREATEST DEAL OF ALL!!!
** [Friendship]!!!
** KRIS!!! MY DAYS AS A [Long-Nosed Doll] ARE OVER!!!
** CUT THAT [Wire] AND MAKE ME A [Real Boy]!!
** ARE YOU WATCHING, [Heaven]!? IT'S TIME FOR SPAMTON'S [Comeback Special]!
** AND THIS TIME... I LIVE FOR MYSELF!!!
** NO... MYSELF AND MY [Friend(s)]!!!
** HERE I GO!!!! WATCH ME FLY, [MAMA]!!!!
* WAIT!! [$!?!] THE PRESSES! [Defeated]
** HAHAHA... KRIS!!! YOU THINK DEPLETING MY [8000 Life Points]
** MEANS YOU'VE WON [A Free Meal] TO [Winning]?!
** NO!!! NO!!! NE-O!!
** KRIS!! YOUR [Deal] HAS FAILED!! [NEO] NEVER LOSES!!
** THIS IS [Victory Smoke]!! IT MEANS IT'S TIME FOR MY [Second Form]!
** ARE YOU READY KRIS!? FOR MY [Next Trick]!
** I WILL FILL MY [Body] WITH [Electricaty] AND BECOME SPAMTON [EX]!
** ARE YOU READY [Kids]!?
** [Turn up the JUICE!] [Turn up the JUICE!]
** [Make Sure You Don't Get It On Your Shoese!]
** ARE YOU GETTING ALL THIS [Mike]!? I'M FINALLY
** I'M FINALLY GONNA BE A BIG SHOT!!!
** HERE I GO!!!! WATCH ME FLY, [MAMA]!!!!
;; Snowgrave Route
* I REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE JUST A LOST [Little Sponge]. [Flying Heads I]
** SLEEPING AT THE BOTTOM OF A DUMPSTER!
* I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING I HAD! MY LIFE ADVICE! [Spam Mail I]
** I TOLD YOU [4 Left] AND ASKED YOU [Buy] OR [Don't Buy]!
* I GAVE YOU MY [Commemorative Ring] FOR THE PRICE OF [My Favorite Year]! [Chained Heart I]
* AND THIS IS HOW YOU [Repay] ME!? TREATING ME LIKE [DLC]!? [A Call For You I]
* NO, I GET IT! IT'S YOU AND THAT [Hochi Mama]! [Gripping Phones #1]
** YOU'VE BEEN [Making], HAVEN'T YOU!
* YOU'VE BEEN MAKING [Hyperlink Blocked]! [Eyes, Nose and Mouth #1, if Spamton is above 30% HP or below 70% MERCY]
** AND NOW THAT YOU HAVE YOUR OWN SUPPLY, YOU DON'T NEED ME!!!
* I WAS TOO [Trusting] TOO [Honest]. [Chained Heart II]
** I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A MAN OF THE [PIPIS]. A REAL [PIPIS] PERSON!
* I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU WOULD HAVE USED MY [Ring] FOR [Evil]... [Flying Heads II #1]
** OH, [Right]. THAT'S WHY I SOLD IT TO YOU
* YOU THINK MAKING [Frozen Chicken] WITH YOUR [Side Chick] [Eyes, Nose and Mouth #2, if Spamton is above 30% HP or below 70% MERCY]
** IS GONNA LET YOU DRINK UP THAT [Sweet, Sweet] [Freedom Sauce]?
* WELL, YOU'RE [$!$!] RIGHT! BUT DON'T BLAME ME [Gripping Phones #2]
** WHEN YOU'RE [Crying] IN A [Broken Home] WISHING YOU LET YOUR OLD PAL SPAMTON [Kill You]
* MY ESTEEM CUSTOMER I SEE YOU ARE ATTEMPTING TO DEPLETE MY HP! [Under 10% HP]
** I'LL ADMIT YOU'VE GOT SOME [Guts] KID!
** BUT IN A [1 for 1] BATTLE, NEO NEVER LOSES!!!
** IT'S TIME FOR A LITTLE [Bluelight Specil].
** DIDN'T YOU KNOW [Neo] IS FAMOUS FOR ITS HIGH DEFENSE!?
** NOW... ENJ0Y THE FIR3WORKS, KID!!!
* My esteem customer I see you are attempting to deplete my HP! [Unused]
* ENJOY THE FIREWORKS, KID!!!! [Neutral, final phase]
* WHAT!? YOU'RE CALLING FRIENDS!? [Call for help #1]
** YOU THINK YOU CAN BEAT ME WITH YOUR FRIENDS' [Magic]!?
** GO AHEAD, [Kid]... CALL ALL YOU WANT!
** NO ONE WILL EVER PICK UP
* GO AHEAD AND [Scream] INTO THE [Receiver]. [Call for help #2]
** THE [Voice] RUNS OUT EVENTUALLY.
** YOUR [Voice] THEIR [Voice].
** UNTIL YOU REALIZE YOU ARE ALL ALONE
* THERE WILL BE NO MORE [Miracles] NO MORE [Magic]. [Call for help #3]
** YOU LOST IT WHEN YOU TRIED TO SEE TOO FAR....
** ... YOU LOST IT...
* YOU MAKE ME [Sick]! [Call for help #4]
** MUTTERING YOUR [Lost Friends] NAMES AT THE BOTTOM OF A [Dumpster]!
** NO ONE'S GONNA HELP YOU!!!
** GET THAT THROUGH YOUR [Beautiful Head], YOU LITTLE [Worm]!
* ... HER? [Call for help #5]
** YOU'RE STILL TRYING TO [Use] HER!?
** HA HA HA HA!!!
** YOU THINK SHE CAN [Hear] YOU NOW, MUTTERING HER NAME!?
** WHAT'S SHE GONNA DO, MAKE ME AN [Ice Cream]!?
** HEY, IS IT COLD IN HERE OR IS IT JUST ME?
==== Post-Battle ====
; Spamton
* [After defeating him (Spared)]
** NOW ON TO THE NEXT STEP...
** I'LL BE WAITING AT MY [[Home-made Storefront Site]]
** IN THE [[Trash Area Closed For Repairs.]]
** COME... ALONE.
** AND DON'T... FORGET!
** TO [[Like And Subscribe]] FOR MORE [[Hyperlink Blocked.]]
** HAEAHAEAHAEAHAEAH!!
* [After defeating him (Health depleted)]
** HEY!!! DIDN'T YOU EVER HEAR THE PHRASE, [Make Money, Not War]!
** HOW'S AN INNOCENT GUY LIKE ME SUPPOSED TO [Rip People Off]
** WHEN KIDS LIKE YOU ARE [Beating People Up],
** [Spitting] IN THEIR EYES, THROWING SAND IN THEIR [Face],
** [Stomping] ON THEIR TOES, YANKING THEIR [Noses],
** AND NOT EVEN GIVING THEM A SINGLE CENT FOR IT!?
** [Normal]
*** YOU SHOULD HAVE DONE ALL THAT EARLIER!
*** AND BEEN THE FIRST TO OWN MY [Commemorative Ring]
*** TOO BAD! SEE YOU KID!
** [If the Snowgrave Route was aborted, and ThornRing was not equipped on Noelle]
*** IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN BEAT ME UP,
*** JUST BECAUSE YOU BOUGHT MY [Commemorative Ring]!
*** AT LEAST BUY [2]!
*** TOO BAD! SEE YOU KID!
; Spamton NEO
;; Normal Route
* It seems after all I couldn't be anything more than a simple puppet.
* But you three... You're strong.
* With a power like that...
* Maybe you three can break your own strings.
* Let me become your strength.
* [Narrator] (You got ShadowCrystal.)
* [If the equipment is full]
** [Narrator] (... but your inventory was full.)
** ... Kris...? Kris!? KRIS!?!?!?
** YOU FILLED YOUR [Inventorium] WITH [Half-Pr1ce Sallamy] JUST TO KEEP ME OUT!?
** WHAT! THE! [Fifty Percent Off]!?
** YOU CAN CARRY LIKE 48 ITEMS!!!
** [Why] DID YOU DO THIS!? WHY!? [Y]!? [Yellow]!? [Gamma]!?
** NOT [Cool] KRIS! I'LL BE IN MY [Trailer]!
* [Narrator] (You got Dealmaker.) [Spared Spamton NEO]
* [Narrator] (You got PuppetScarf.) [Defeated Spamton NEO]
=== Flavor Text ===
; Spamton
* He wants to make a DEAL, but don't give him your MONEY! [Check]
* DON'T YOU WANNA BE A BIG SHOT? [Encounter]
* THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH HAVING A NICE [Splurge] EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE [Turn 2]
* There's nothing wrong. There's NOTHING WRONG. THERE'S NOTHING WRONG. [Turn 3]
* Great ENEMY! SUSCRIBE NOW! [Neutral]
* Spamton mutters "1997." [Neutral]
* Smells like KROMER. [Neutral]
* CONGRULATIONS YOU ARE THE 100th VISITOR!!! CLICK HERE TO [Die] [Neutral]
* Spamton flashes an award-losing smile. [Neutral]
* (You felt your KROMER being absorbed...) (Wrong choice...?) [GIVE MONEY/DON'T TAKE DEAL/BUY INSURANCE/GIVE ACCOUNT ACCESS]
; Spamton NEO
; Any Route
* YOU WON'T FIND HIGHER ATTACK AND DEFENSE ANYWHERE ELSE!!! [Check #1]
** THE SMOOTH TASTE OF NEO "WAKE UP AND TASTE THE PAIN".
** [[note: pain is in red.]] . [Unused]
* He is his own worst invention. [Check #2+]
* It's time to be a BIG SHOT! [Encounter]
* Hold and release [(CONFIRM Button)] to fire a BIG SHOT! [Neutral, if no big shots were fired]
* Spamton turns to the audience and laughs. [Neutral, if big shots were fired #1]
* Spamton appeals to the audience with a festive jig! [Neutral, if big shots were fired #2]
* Spamton begs to the audience, Spamton prays to the audience. [Neutral, if big shots were fired #3]
* There is no audience. [Neutral, if big shots were fired #4]
* Spamton begs the audience to stop taking the furniture out of his room. [Neutral, if big shots were fired #7]
* Spamton feels the sweet breeze as he takes a ride around town. [Neutral, if big shots were fired #10]
* The stage lights are shattered. [Neutral]
* The air crackles with freedom. [Neutral]
* It pulls the strings and makes them ring. [Neutral]
* Smells like rotten glass. [Neutral]
* Spamton looks to the heavens. [Neutral; unused]
;; Normal Route
* You/Susie/Ralsei snapped a wire! [Snap/Snap/Snap]
* You/Susie/Ralsei snapped desperately! [Snap/Snap/Snap, if both other party members are down]
** Broke 2 wires!
* You/Ralsei/Susie tried to snap a wire... but it failed [Unused]
* Everyone snapped wires! [SnapAll]
** Everyone tried to snap wires... but it failed! [Unused]
* You Super Charged! Can charge bullets faster! Lasts 20 shots. [Supercharge]
* Ralsei defended you! [FluffyGuard]
* Too many fluff balls! Can't make any more! [FluffyGuard, if there are already three fluff balls]
** You have too many tiny Ralsei! [Removed]
** The power Ralsei's fluffy warmth surrounds you!. [Unused]
* Press [(MENU)] to throw, aim for the weakpoint! [Unused]
** The wire was cut!
** Missed!
;; Snowgrave Route
* Kris used X-Slash! [X-Slash]
* RECOVERED HP with pipis! [FriedPipis]
** [<number>] Liked this!
* Spamton Neo's ATTACK dropped! Spamton Neo's DEFENSE rose greatly! [Below 10% HP]
* Spamton NEO recovered HP with Pipis! [Attempting to damage Spamton NEO below 6% HP]
* Spamton NEO's DEFENSE is towering. [Neutral, below 10% HP]
* Kris called for help... [Call for help #1-4]
** ... but nobody came.
* You whispered Noelle's name... [Call for help #5]
== Shop Dialogue ==
; Cyber City
* HEY EVERY       ! IT'S ME, SPAMTON G.   SPAMTON! [Upon entrance]
* HURRY UP AND BUY! [Upon exiting a menu]
;; BUY/BUYMORE!!!
* DEALS SO GOOD I'LL [$!$$] MYSELF! [While purchasing]
* DELICIOUS KROMER [On purchase]
** MONEY NO [Not enough D$]
** [Storing up for the winter!] [Full inventory]
** YOU HAVE TOO MUCH MONEY [Full inventory and storage]
* WHAT!? YOU WERE SO CLOSE!! [Refuse buy]
;; TALKING
* LET'S MAKE A DEAL.
* [OUR DEAL #1]
** KRIS!!! YOU [Little Sponge]! I KNEW YOU'D COME HERE [[On A Saturday Night]]!
** AFTER ALL, YOU WANNA BE A [Big Shot]! EAHAHAHAHAA!!
** BUT HOW? HOW CAN YOU BE?
** LISTEN. IN THE [Deep Abyss] OF QUEEN'S [Mansion]
** [[A Great Deal]] IS WAITING For [[A LimiTed Time Only!]] A HEAVEN-PIERCING [[Workout-Ready Body]]
** [[Designed BY The Classics You've Come To Expect! (C)1997]]
** KRIS THAT [Little Nipper] IS OUR [One-way Ticket] TO MAKE YOU [Big]. MAKE ME [Big].
** BEFORE YOU KNOW IT WE WILL BE TAKING [ A Ride around Town on Our Specil Cungadero]
** VACATIONING IN [Burning acid] WHILE YOU SOAK IN THE [Hyperlink Blocked].
** BUT KRIS DON'T [Breathe] YET!! THE WAY IS LOCKED BY [High Quality Encryption]!!!
** YOU WILL NEVER GET INSIDE.
** WAIT KRIS LOOK!! HEAR THOSE [Balloons]??? YOU ARE [1000th Customer]!!.
** AS A [Commemorative Ring] I WILL LET YOU BUY [KeyGen] FROM ME AT [The Low Low Price Of]
** WHAT DO YOU THINK!?!? IT'S SUCH A STEAL, I'M [$!X$]ING MYSELF!!!
** TAKE THIS DEAL AND YOU WILL [[Die]]!! IT'S THAT GOOD!!!
** [BUY] THE KEYGEN FROM ME, UNLOCK THE BASEMENT, AND GET THAT EmptyDisk!!!
* [OUR DEAL #2+]
** KRIS!! BUY [KeyGen] FROM ME AND GO TO QUEEN'S MANSION'S [Luxurious Basement Apartment]!!
** WHAT!? GO MYSELF!? KRIS!!!!! NO!!!!! THE MEN INSIDE WOULD THE MEN INSIDE WOULD
* KEYGEN [OUR DEAL (KeyGen purchased)]
* [ABOUT YOU]
** I USED TO BE NOTHING BUT THE E_MAIL GUY, NOW I'M THE [[It Burns! Ow! Stop! Help Me! It Burns!]] GUY!
** [[Amazed at thi5 amazing transformation? You too can]] HAVE A [[Communion]] WITH [[Unintelligble Laughter]]
** SOON I'LL EVEN SURPASS THAT DAMNED [[Clown Around Town!]]
** BUT UNLIKE HIM I'M GONNA [[Shoot For the Sky!]] AND  GET ON THE PATH TO ...
** [[The Big One]]
** I'LL GET SO. I'LL GET SO. I'LL GET SO. I'LL GET SO. I'LL GET SO. I'LL GET SO.
** [[Hyperlink blocked.]]
* [KNIGHT]
** SPEAKING OF [[Communion]]
** KRIS, DID YOU KNOW THAT THE KNIGHT...
** No, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to --
** TOO MANY EXCESS VACATION DAYS?? TAKE A GOD DAMN VACATION STRAIGHT TO HELL
* [FRIENDS]
** ME? ... FRIENDS?
** EAHAEHAEHAEHAEH!!! KRIS! YOU AND ME. ARE ALREADY [Friend Request Accepted]
** WE DON'T NEED ANYONE ELSE!!! WE DON'T NEED [[Easels]] or [[CRTs]]!
** WE DON'T NEED ANY [[Man, Woman, or Child]] [[At Half Price]]!!
** WE DON'T NEED [[MIKE]]!!!
** ... ... Mike...
** KRIS!!! DON'T BELIEVE [[Anything You See On TV!]] THE MAN'S A CRIMINAL, I TELL YOU!! A CRIMINAL!!
* [FEAR #1]
** WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF??? ACCORDING TO [[Encyclopedia of]] [[Being Afraid]]
** THERE'S NOTHING TO FEAR EXCEPT
** ...
** ... can anyone hear me? Help...
** HUH??? WHAT?? NO, I DIDN'T HEAR ANYTHING JUST NOW!!!
** ... BUT IT SOUNDED LIKE THEY WERE TALKING TO YOU.
* ... [FEAR #2+]
* [GIVE DISK]
** KRIS!!! YOU DID IT!! YOU [[Funky]] LITTLE [[Worm]]! YOU BROUGHT ME THE DISK!!
** HOCHI MAMA!!!! I CAN FEEL THAT [Smooth Taste] ALREADY!!
** ... NOW KRIS. DON'T BE GREEDY. HAND OVER. THE DISK.
** THEN WE WILL TRANSFER.
** MY [[Hyperlink Blocked]].
** THEN. KRIS. AFTER. THIS IS VERY, VERY IMPORTANT.
** GO BACK. AND PUT. THE DISK. BACK. WHERE YOU GOT IT.
** DO THAT... AND YOU HAVE MY [Specil Guaranttee] I WILL [[Pass My Savings Onto You!]]
** EVERY [Big], EVERY [Shot], EVERY [Hyperlink Blocked], ALL YOURS, KRIS.
** SO WHAT DO YOU SAY? BIG SHOT...
** [[Warning! If you consent to the terms and agreements,]] [[OUR STORE is PERMANENTLY Closing Down!!]]
*: (The options "TRANSFER" and "DO NOT" are printed extremely large and small, respectively.)
* [TRANSFER]
** FINALLY!!! I KNEW YOU WOULD [[Request Accepted]]
** KRIS!!! HERE I GO!!! BEGIN THE [[Transfer]]
* [DO NOT]
** TURNING DOWN A BELOVED [[Stranger]]... THAT'S NOT VERY [[Big Shot]] OF YOU, KRIS.
;; ESCAPE
* DON'T FORGET TO [Like and Subscribe] FOR MORE [Hyperlink Blocked]!
** MANSION... BASEMENT! FIND IT!! [After purchasing KeyGen]
*** YOU'RE LEAVING!? WHAT ABOUT MY DISK!?!? [If carrying Empty Disk]
; Cyber City (Dumpster)
;; Snowgrave Route
* [Before all enemies are frozen]
** LOOKING FOR [Irresistible Deals] THAT WILL [Blow Your Mind!?]
** WELL [Shut Your Mouth] BECAUSE YOU ARE [A Weakling!]
** TRY A LITTLE [Friday Night Work Out]...
** THEN I'LL SHOW YOU MY
** THEN I'LL SHOW YOU MY
** <number> LEFT.
* [Repeat interaction]
** GET STRONGER!
** THEN I'LL SHOW YOU MY
** THEN I'LL SHOW YOU MY
** <number> LEFT.
* [After all enemies are frozen]
** [Angel], [Angel]
** ARE YOU LOOKING FOR THE [Ring] of [Thorns]?
** THEN [[WHY]] GO TO A DUMPSTER!!! [No]
** THat'll be 1997 KROMER. [Yes]
*** BUT IT WAS SUCH A GOOD YEAR. [No]
*** [Full inventory]
**** LET ME CHECK YOUR [Pockets]
**** WOW, NICE AND SPACIOUS!!
**** PERFECT FOR [City Livin']
**** HOW CAN YOU [Afford] THIS!?!?!
**** ... YET THERE'S NO ROOM FOR A [Ring]
**** THERE'S A [Boy], BUT THERE'S NO ROOM FOR A [Ring]
*** [Money] NO [Not enough money]
*** [Yes]
**** HERE'S YOUR [Ring]! CAREFUL, IT MIGHT [Sting]
**** EAHEAHEAH
**** (You got the ThornRing.)
* [After buying the Thorn Ring]
** DON'T WORRY! FOR OUR [No Money Back Guaranttee]
** THIS IS [One Purchase] YOU WILL [Regret] FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!
== Gallery ==
 KeyGen item.gif | Talking about "OUR DEAL" after buying KeyGen.
 Spamton overworld laughing.gif | Spamton's laugh.
 Spamton overworld glitched laugh.gif | Spamton's glitched laugh.
 Spamton overworld sinister.png | Spamton with a sinister expression.
 Spamton overworld back.png | Spamton, as seen from the backside.
 Spamton battle spared.png | Spamton's hurt/spared sprite.
 Spamton overworld defeat vines.png | Spamton wrapped in wires after battling his Spamton NEO form on a normal route.
 Spamton battle head enlarge.gif | Spamton's face expanding in battle.
 Spamton battle laugh.gif | Spamton's mouth open in battle.
 Spamton overworld painting.png | Spamton's Painting in Queen's Mansion on the Snowgrave Route.
 Spamton overworld NEO body.png | The NEO body before being inhabited by Spamton.
 Spamton battle angry.gif | Enraged Spamton NEO.
 Spamton battle giant.png | Spamton NEO's giant form, as seen during his special attack.
 Spamton battle cherub.gif | A miniature Spamton with angel-like characteristics. Provides healing if the F1 key is pressed during any Spamton fight. 
 Spamton overworld dance.gif | Spamton dancing, from the Spamton Sweepstakes charity event on the Deltarune website.
 Spamton Sweepstakes.png | Spamton as he appears on the Spamton Sweepstakes logo from the Deltarune website.
 Spamton plush artwork.png | Spamton plush sold on Fangamer.
 Spamton artwork Nendoroid.png | Spamton Nendoroid sold on Good Smile Company.
 Spamton pin artwork.png | Spamton pin sold on Fangamer.
== Trivia ==
* Spamton is the only character to exclusively address Kris and ignore the other party members.
* The Autumn 2024 Newsletter revealed that a character named Mad Mailer was originally planned but scrapped due to similarities with Spamton. Many of Mad Mailer's design elements seem to have influenced Spamton's appearance.
* Splendidland's X page features unused concept art of Spamton's house as she imagined it, a junk heap of e-mails and deleted icons.
* Spamton's intro song "HEY EVERY !" was planned to be his shop theme, and was supposed to drop in pitch the longer you stayed in the shop until it was unrecognizable, but it didn't match the tone of the dialogue so it was scrapped and replaced with "Dialtone".
* "Spamton" is an anagram of "Postman", fitting his nature as spam mail.
* "Spamton" may be a reference to Mammon the prince of greed in a similar vein to how "Jevil" appears to be a reference to the Devil.
* Spamton has an obsession with 1997, describing it as his favorite year, and occasionally mentions someone named Mike. These may be references to a 1997 commercial for "Big Shot" soda featuring then New Orleans Saints Head Coach Mike Ditka, due to Spamton's association with the phrase "BIG SHOT."
* Spamton consistently calls Dark Dollars "Kromer," which is likely a misspelling of "Krone/Krone" (plural: Kroner) and "Krona" (plural: Kronor), the basic units of currency in Norway, Denmark and Sweden.
** The misspelling may also be a nod to Spamton's visual resemblance to Billy the Puppet from Saw, as Jigsaw's last name is Kramer.
* Spamton seems to have a mild fascination with Heaven and angels as indicated by some of his dialogue, although it is unclear what he, a Darkner, exactly believes these to be.
* Spamton mentions the made-up word "cungadero" twice. Its meaning is unclear, though it may have been derived from "chingadero," a Mexican swear word.
** "[ A Ride around Town on Our Specil Cungadero]," as well as other promotional references, implies it may be some form of vehicle.
** This is further implied by the "Cungadero Crossing" sign given away during the Spamton Sweepstakes.
** With this in mind, it is likely a reference to the Simpsons joke "Canyonero".
* As hinted by one of his battle dialogues, pressing F1 during Spamton's first battle summons a small Spamton angel that heals the SOUL for 50% HP. This only works once, and cannot be done in the middle of one of his attacks.
** This also works in the battle against Spamton NEO (even on the Snowgrave Route), healing the entire party.
** This keybind is set to right stick on the Switch and R3 on the PS4. Alternatively, F1 can still be used on console if a keyboard is connected.
** The use of the F1 key to heal and support the SOUL is likely a reference to how the F1 key on computer keyboards is commonly used as a support or help key.
* When defeated through violence, Spamton's post-battle dialogue hints towards the Snowgrave Route, mentioning "YOU SHOULD HAVE DONE THAT EARLIER!" in regards to Kris's violence, "AND BEEN THE FIRST TO OWN MY [Commemorative Ring]," referencing the Thorn Ring, an item only available on the Snowgrave Route which is purchased from Spamton.
* To the right of the dumpster where Spamton is first encountered, there is a torn "Queen Clean!" poster, with another poster behind it displaying what appears to be Spamton's likeness, but without the glasses. Interacting with the poster reveals that it reads "Big Shot Auto Sales!" implying that at some point Spamton was a car salesman, either as the face of a company or running his own.
* A black telephone set in the back of Spamton's shop heavily resembles the sprite for the same telephones seen in EarthBound, which the protagonist, Ness, uses to call his father throughout the game. Its appearance in Spamton's shop is likely one of many simple references to EarthBound, one of Toby Fox's favorite games.
* Spamton's constantly fluctuating wares price appears to be a parody of cryptocurrencies such as Bitcoin.
* Spamton's "KNIGHT" dialogue ("TOO MANY EXCESS VACATION DAYS?? TAKE A GOD DAMN VACATION STRAIGHT TO HELL") references Burgerpants's "Threaten" dialog from Undertale's Genocide Route ("I can't go to hell. I'm all out of vacation days.").
* Selecting OUR DEAL again when the party already has the KeyGen makes Spamton's face flash a rainbow hue, and the usual background music is replaced with "KEYGEN." This is a reference to the YouTube Poop [YTP] The King Downloads Sony Vegas in which King Harkinian from Link: The Faces of Evil runs a keygen for Sony Vegas, at which point he begins rapidly flashing colours, albeit much more violently than Spamton. The Deltarune song "KEYGEN" even sounds similar to the keygen music that plays in the background of the video ("Unreal Superhero 3" by Kenet & Rez), mimicking the opening few seconds of the song.
* The final offer for transferring Spamton's code onto the EmptyDisk is a reference to programs that downloaded usually unwanted software onto a computer while hiding the option to refuse said software in hard-to-see places, hence the big "TRANSFER" and small "DO NOT" respectively.
* When travelling through the basement, in the room with the teacup ride, a grinning face can briefly be seen in the darkness before disappearing. The face bears the same eye colors as Spamton's glasses, but Spamton himself cannot be present at the time due to still being at his shop in the Trash Zone. Its sprite's filename is IMAGE_FRIEND, using the same naming convention for assets relating to the voice (filename in all capital letters and using the prefix "IMAGE_" for sprites instead of "spr_"), implying a possible connection.
* His glasses are not colored consistently, often flipping when he turns around. They are opposite between his normal battle and his Spamton NEO battle.
* Spamton NEO's torso armor and wings seem to make up the shape of the Delta Rune, which appears frequently in both Undertale and Deltarune.
* Spamton NEO's check text parallels error text used in Undertale's TESTROOM: Time to wake up and smell the pain.
* Spamton NEO has the highest HP out of all of the Chapter 2 enemies, with GIGA Queen having the second highest, 4500. He also has the highest AT out of all of the Chapter 2 enemies, which goes even higher if enraged, making him the only enemy who is capable of dealing more than 100 damage in a hit.
* One of Spamton NEO's flavor texts, "It pulls the strings and makes them ring," is one of the lyrics spoken in "BIG SHOT."
* If a party member is downed when the Spamton NEO battle ends, their negative HP remains outside battle, even persisting into the overworld. (This differs from the normal system where downed party members are restored to 1 HP upon exiting battle.) Should the party enter another encounter while in this negative HP state, this can cause glitches with party members' actions and turns, particularly Kris's.
* When defeating Spamton NEO through violence in the Normal Route, he says "YOU THINK DEPLETING MY [8000 LIFE POINTS]," a reference to the Yu-Gi-Oh Trading Card Game, in which each player starts with 8000 Life Points. Despite this, Spamton only has 4809 HP.
* When backtracking to Cyber City after reaching the Mansion, the Werewire before the first crossing mentions that they repeatedly petitioned for a public merry-go-round, but "some ex-famous guy" of a "salesman-lobbyist-type" stopped it from being built because he was afraid of clowns. This likely refers to Spamton.
* Spamton's implied Hometown equivalent can be found in the form of the computer nearest to the recycling bin. If Spamton NEO is encountered at any point, this computer crashes with a blue screen. If Spamton NEO is not encountered, it only says that someone tried to check their email but the Internet is down.
** The nearby recycling bin is filled with spam email printouts, possibly representing Spamton's shop in the Trash Zone.
* The use of Mad Dummy's leitmotif and soundfont in "BIG SHOT" may be a reference to the fact that Spamton (especially Spamton NEO) is both Mad (in both senses of the word, "crazed" and "angry") and resembles a ventriloquist dummy.
* The Japanese name for "BIG SHOT" is "Power of [[BIG]]," a direct reference to the name of Mettaton NEO's theme, "Power of NEO".
* "NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A" and "BIG SHOT" both sample the "Wow!" sound effect that plays in EarthBound after naming the party and pressing start. "NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A" also samples Vile's theme from Mega Man X and Boris' Cocktail from Earthbound's OST.
* Jevil and Spamton NEO, as hidden bosses, have several similarities.
** Jevil became insane after meeting an unknown person, and Spamton became successful after a phone call from an unknown person.
** Both battles have "The air crackles with freedom" as flavor text. 
** Seam says that thinking on Jevil's words makes their thoughts "yet darker." An Addison states that when he picked up Spamton's phone "it was nothing but garbage noise." "Yet darker" is a quote from W. D. Gaster's Entry 17 in Undertale, while "garbage noise" is the in-game description of mus_smile, the sound that plays when reading Entry 17. (mus_smile also plays in Deltarune when trying to use the Cell Phone in a Dark World, as well as in front of the Hometown bunker.)
** Spamton mentions a "clown" multiple times, whom he seems to despise and envy, which may be a reference to Jevil.
** Like Jevil, Spamton has several voice clips, though they're exclusively present in his songs.
** A The World Revolving leitmotif, previously unique to Jevil's themes, appears in BIG SHOT and Dialtone.
* Spamton has many similarities to Mettaton from Undertale.
** Both characters use the suffix "-ton" in their names.
** The dress that the Spamton-shaped mannequin in Cyber City wears is identical to Mettaton's dress during his parody of Final Fantasy VI's opera performance.
** The machine has a strong resemblance to Mettaton NEO, which is (a version of) Mettaton's dream body in Undertale, with the main difference being a much more sharp and garish look. Spamton NEO additionally namedrops Mettaton NEO's battle theme, "Power of "NEO"," just before his strongest attack.
** Defeating Spamton NEO violently in a normal route prompts him to try becoming "Spamton EX," referencing Mettaton's other advanced form in Undertale, Mettaton EX.
** Both the Spamton NEO and Mettaton EX battles use their hearts as attacks that can be dealt damage to, as well as smaller versions of themselves and bombs that explode in a Bomberman-style cross pattern as projectiles (the two's bomb attacks even use identical sprites). Both also put the SOUL in the Yellow SOUL Mode.
** Spamton's constant head movement is done in a manner similar to Mettaton EX's constant pose changes.
** During Spamton NEO's final attack, the words "WRECK," "PAUSE," and "SPEW" can be seen in the bottom left corner of the screen, referencing Mettaton EX's "REC" and "REW" mechanics. (Prior to version v1.08, these words only appeared on the Snowgrave Route, and PAUSE did not appear at all.)
** It is implied that the Lightner whose hopes and dreams became the machine used in Spamton's NEO form is Mettaton. A ghost who lives with Napstablook (implied to be Mettaton) describes themselves as a "nobody."
** "BIG SHOT," Spamton NEO's boss song, contains leitmotifs from Mettaton NEO and Mad Dummy's (who's a cousin to Mettaton) themes.
** The flavor text lines, "The stage lights are shattered." and "He is his own worst invention." are likely references to the lines "Stage lights are blaring." and "Dr. Alphys's greatest invention." from Mettaton NEO's fight, as well.
** Both Spamton NEO and Mettaton EX fights refer to an audience in their flavor text, although it is implied to be nonexistent in the Spamton NEO fight.
* Spamton may also have a few references to Flowey:
** Spamton hangs from vines after being defeated on the normal route, like how Flowey ensnared the main characters at the end of True Pacifist.
** Digital Roots and the unused spamton_house.ogg use the Your Best Nightmare leitmotif.
** Spamton attempts to take Kris's SOUL after becoming Spamton NEO to obtain "FREEDOM," whereas Flowey attempts to take the protagonist's SOUL as Photoshop Flowey to "become god."
** The bullets fired by Spamton NEO's mini heads resemble Flowey's friendliness pellets.
* Spamton's claim about NEO "never losing" and that it is "famous for its high defense" (and his Bluelight Specil, which greatly boosts it) may be an ironic reference to Mettaton NEO, who is known for having extremely low defense at a point where he's instantly defeated in one hit, regardless of how strong it is.
** Even more ironically, Spamton NEO has a negative defense stat on the Snowgrave Route before he activates his Bluelight Specil. However, this is only so that Kris isn't at an unfair disadvantage when they fight against Spamton alone.
* In the Japanese version of the game, Spamton's speech quirk mixes kanji, hiragana, katakana, and roman text. He frequently mixes half-width and full-width katakana, misspells words using similar looking characters (for example, "ﾁｬｿｽ" instead of "ﾁｬﾝｽ"), and produces several puns based around the concept of death.
** Spamton replaces almost all instances of "desu" (です) and "dai" (だい) with the English words "death" and "die," rendered in Roman text.
** Spamton formats the first-person pronoun "watakushi" as "ワタ94," a goroawase pun playing on possible pronunciations for the numbers nine and four in Japanese; the latter specifically uses a pronunciation that acts as a homophone for "shi" (死), the Japanese word for death. This homophone has led to the number four being traditionally regarded as unlucky in Japanese culture, being invoked similarly to the numbers 13 and 666 in Christocentric societies.
** The "WRECK" and "PAUSE" icons associated with his [Power of NEO] attack use the non-standard translations "殺エイ中" and "テイ死", respectively ("record" and "pause" are typically translated as "撮影中" and "停止"). The former uses an alternate reading of the kanji for "kill," while the latter incorporates the kanji for "death." The "SPEW" icon is translated as "モドス," which generally means "rewind" or "return" but is also slang for "vomit."
* Spamton NEO's line "ARE YOU READY [Kids]!?" after being violently defeated by Kris, Susie, and Ralsei could be a reference to the SpongeBob SquarePants theme song, whose first line ("Are you ready, kids?") is spoken by Painty the Pirate.
* Spamton NEO's "Bluelight Specil" is a reference to the Kmart department store chain's Blue Light Special sales promotions, where sales on items would be announced spontaneously over loudspeaker and accompanied by a flashing blue light.
* Spamton NEO's boss theme "BIG SHOT" shares many similar music cues from Metallic Madness (Present) from Sonic CD.
* Spamton's full name may be a reference to the eccentric salesman Stan S. Stanman from the Monkey Island series, as both characters share a very talkative behavior and a certain obsession with deals.
* Spamton knew Noelle before the events of Chapter 2, Noelle being the only one to read his spam mail. He sent her a digital Pipis for Cat Petterz 2 as a thank you present, which duplicated until she had to clear her save file.
** Before the Twitter Q&A, several users finding /bluecircle/ and /egg/ theorized that Noelle had created Spamton. Spamton clarified in the Q&A that he sent her the Pipis, but her having them did not create Spamton.
* At the Fangamer FAQ with Spamton during the Spamton Sweepstakes event, Spamton recognizes Jevil. The quote "[$#£* the ketchup kids]" references a meme addressed to one's ex, possibly implying such a relationship between Spamton and Jevil.
* When entering Spamton's shop after he is transferred to the Disk, a small clip of his dialogue can be heard before it gets cut off.
* The colors used for Spamton's sprite belong to the default color palette in Microsoft Paint.
** This is also true for the Addisons.
* Spamton NEO is the only enemy on the Snowgrave Route who requires the use of violence (dealing damage via either attacking or X-Slash) to finish the battle.
* The flavor text that appears when Kris attempts to call their friends for the first four times end with "...but nobody came." This text is used many times in Undertale, especially during the Genocide Route. The text itself may have originated from EarthBound, where during a battle with an enemy that could call for help, the text "But nobody came." appears if no reinforcements show up.
* Spamton has one uncapitalized line of shop dialogue - "... can anyone hear me? Help..." - that is sandwiched between other lines where his speech is capitalized as normal. The line resembles part of the unused text found in the files of Chapter 1 ("Someone!? Anyone!? Can anyone hear me?"), with the Japanese version of Spamton's line being a direct match. Spamton then says he didn't hear anything but that "IT SOUNDED LIKE THEY WERE TALKING TO YOU", implying that someone or something else was speaking through him at that moment. 
== References ==
Category:Bonus Boss Enemies
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Category:Boss Enemies