Transformers/Transcript

[We open in space as a strange cube falls towards the planet Earth.]
Optimus Prime: (voiceover) Before time began, there was the Cube. We know not where it comes from, only that it holds the power to create worlds and fill them with life. That is how our race was born. For a time, we lived in harmony, but like all great power, some wanted it for good, others for evil. And so began the war, a war that ravaged our planet until it was consumed by the death, and the Cube was lost to the far reaches of space. We scattered across the galaxy, hoping to find it and rebuild our home, searching every star, every world. And just when all hope seemed lost, message of a new discovery drew us to an unknown planet called Earth. But we were already too late.
[We fade to the deserts of Qatar in the Middle West, where a helicopter flew by with soldiers inside.]
Figueroa: Oh, God, five months of this. I can't wait to get a little taste of home. A plate of mama's alligators étouffée. Mmm.
Epps: You've been talking about barbecued 'gators and crickets for the last two weeks. I'm never going to your mama's house, Fig. I promise.
Figueroa: But, Bobby, Bobby…
Epps: I’m never going to your mama’s house.
Figueroa: Bobby, 'gators are known to have the most succulent meat.
Epps: I understand.
Figueroa: (speaks in Spanish)
Epps: (mimics Figueroa’s Spanish words) English, please. English.
Lennox: I mean, how many times have we… We don't speak Spanish. I told you that.
Figueroa: Why you got to ruin it for me, man? That's my heritage. (speaks in Spanish)
Lennox: Fine. Go with the Spanish. Whatever.
Donnelly: Hey, you guys remember weekends? Huh? The Sox at Fenway. Cold hotdog and a flat beer.
Epps: Perfect day.
Figueroa: What about you, captain? Got a perfect day?
Lennox: Nah, I just can't wait to hold my baby girl for the first time.
Soldiers: Awwww.
Donnelly: He’s adorable.
Epps: That’s too…
Lennox: Shut up!
[The helicopter lands at the army base and the soldiers got out.]
Epps: Hey, I'm ready to do this. Hey, any of y'all grow some balls, come see me on the court, man.
[The soldier was playing a game of basketball in the desert base.]
Epps: Watch this crossover, baby. Like Jordan in his prime, pushing through the front line.
[A young boy, Mahfouz, came to Lennox.]
Mahfouz: Lennox!
Lennox: Hey, how you doing?
Mahfouz: (holds out a satchel of water) Water?
Lennox: (grabs the satchel of water) Thank you. Are you gonna help me with the gear?
[Elsewhere, a black helicopter was flying to the base.]
Radar Officer: Colonel Sharp, we have an inbound unidentified infiltrator, 10 miles out.
Colonel Sharp: (over radio) Unidentified aircraft, you are in restricted US military airspace. Squawk ident and proceed east out of the area.
[The copter kept flying in its path, not turning to the east.]
Colonel Sharp: Raptors one and two, snap to heading two-five-zero to intercept. Bogie is in the weeds ten miles out, not squawking.
[Two jets were sent to intercept the intruding helicopter.]
Colonel Sharp: (over radio) Unidentified aircraft, we will escort you to US SOCCENT air base. If you do not comply, we will use deadly force.
F22 Pilot: Copy the bogie. Tail 4500 X-ray.
[On the helicopter’s tail, it was a USAF 4500X.]
Officer: Sir, says here 4500 X was shot down three months ago. Afghanistan.
Colonel Sharp: That’s got to be a mistake. Check again, then recheck.
Officer: I did, sir. A friend of mine was on that chopper. (over radio) Unidentified aircraft, we will escort you to US SOCCENT air base.
[The two jets escort the helicopter to the army base.]
Colonel Sharp: Radar, where’s the inbound?
Officer: Bogie’s five miles out, sir.
[Lennox went to his tent.]
Lennox: My wife on?
Soldier: Yes, sir.
Lennox: (gets on his computer) Ahahaha! My ladies!
Sarah: (on monitor) Look.
[She shows him the baby girl.]
Lennox: Oh, my goodness. Look at her. She's getting so big. Look at those cheeks. I just wanna chew on them. Baby, we made a good-looking kid. I know that people say that all the time, but... Wow, we made one good-looking kid. Nice work.
Sarah: (on monitor) She has your laugh.
Lennox: She laughed?
Sarah: (on monitor) Her first one, yeah.
Lennox: You la- you sure she didn't just fart?
Sarah: (on monitor) No, she’s a lady. She doesn’t know you yet, but she will.
[Back with the colonel…]
Colonel Sharp: 4500X. Something’s not right.
Officer: Bogie’s on the deck.
Radar Officer: Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Radar's jammed. It's coming from the chopper.
[The computer screen starts staticking.]
Sarah: (on the monitor) Will?
Lennox: Sarah? Hey, Sarah, if you can hear me, I love you and I'll be home soon. (turns off the monitor) Damn. (sighs)
[The helicopter lands in the base.]
Soldier: To the right. Go to the right.
Soldier 2: Check fire.
Colonel Sharp: MH-53 pilot, power down now. Have your crew step out or we will kill you.
[The helicopter stopped moving and began its transformation.]
Soldier: Hold your fire! Stand by to engage!
[It soon transformed into a giant scary robot.]
Colonel Sharp: My God.
[The soldiers open fire and the robot begins attacking them. It then set off a radial blast that destroys the antenna farm.]
Epps: They bombed the antenna farm! We're under attack!
[The robot wreaked havoc across the air base.]
Colonel Sharp: Go! Move! Move!
[The metallic monster grabbed a hardware of files.]
Colonel Sharp: It’s going after the files! Cut the hard lines!
Officer: I need a key! It’s locked!
[The colonel grabs an axe and tries to break it. Meanwhile, the soldiers ran for cover.]
Lennox: Here, hide in here!
[Epps looked up from the ground and saw the giant robot. It aims a plasma cannon at the soldier, but Figueroa blasts it with his gun, giving Epps ample time to escape.]
Lennox: Epps, let’s go!
[The robot then sends out a metallic scorpion to go after the soldiers. Soon, the robot destroyed the base and wiped out the planes as the screen cuts to dark. We fade open to a high school.]
Mr. Hosney: Okay, Mr. Witwicky, you’re up.
Sam: Sorry, I got a lot of stuff.
Trent: Watch this.
Sam: Okay. For my family gene… (gets hit with a spitball)
[The students laughed.]
Mr. Hosney: Who did… who did that? People! Responsibility.
Sam: Okay. So, for my family genealogy report, I decided to do it on my great-great-grandfather, who was a famous man, Captain Archibald Witwicky. Very famous explorer. In fact, he was one of the first... to explore... the Arctic Circle, which is a big deal. In 1897, he took forty one brave sailors straight into the Arctic Shelf.
[We cut to the year 1897, where we see Captain Archibald Witwicky and his men in the Arctic Circle.]
Captain Archibald: Move faster, men! Move! Chop! Heave!
Sailor: The ice is freezing faster than it’s melting!
Captain Archibald: Chop faster!
Sailor: Got to chop faster or we’ll be stuck!
Captain Archibald: Heave, men! Heave! No sacrifice, no victory! We'll get to the Arctic Circle, lads!
[We cut to present day.]
Sam: So that’s the story, right? (gets out some things) And here we have some of the basic instruments and tools used by 19th-century seamen.
[The students chuckled, thinking it was something else, and the teacher raised the stop sign to keep them quiet.]
Sam: This here is the quadrant, which you can get for eighty bucks. It's all for sale, by the way. Like the, uh, the sextant here.
[They laughed again and the teacher raised the stop sign again.]
Sam: Fifty dollars for this, which is a bargain. These are pretty cool. (gets out some glasses) These are my grandfather's glasses. I haven't quite gotten them appraised yet, but they've seen many cool things.
Mr. Hosney: Are you going to sell me his liver? Mr. Witwicky, this isn't show and sell. It's the eleventh grade. I don't think your grandfather would be particularly proud of what you're doing.
Sam: I know. I'm sorry. I just, you know, this is all going towards my car fund. You can tell your folks. It's on eBay. I take PayPal. Cold hard cash works, too. And the compass makes a… a great gift for Columbus Day.
Mr. Hosney: Sam!
Sam: Sorry. Um, unfortunately, my great-great-grandfather, the genius that he was, wound up going blind and crazy in a psycho ward, drawing these strange symbols and babbling on about some, uh, giant ice man that he thought he'd discovered.
Mr. Hosney: Okay. (the bell rings) Might be a pop quiz tomorrow. Might not. Sleep in fear tonight.
Sam: Here, you want? Here, fifty. Forty? Thirty?
Mr. Hosney: Sam?
Sam: Yeah. Sorry, sorry. Okay. Pretty good, right?
Mr. Hosney: Uh… I’d say a solid B-minus.
Sam: A B-minus?
Mr. Hosney: You were hawking your great-grandfather's crap in my classroom.
Sam: No, kids enjoy... Look, can you do me a favor?
Mr. Hosney: What?
Sam: Can you look out the window for a second? You see my father? He's the guy in the green car.
Mr. Hosney: Yeah.
Sam: Okay, I wanna tell you about a dream. A boy's dream. And a man's promise to that boy. He looked at me in the eye. He said, "Son, I'm gonna buy you a car. But I want you to bring me two thousand dollars, and three As." Okay? I got the two thousand dollars and I got two As. Okay? Here's the dream. Your B-minus. Poof. Dream gone. Kaput. Sir, just ask yourself, what would Jesus do?
[Cut to Sam and his dad riding in a car.]
Sam: Yes! Yes, yes.
Mr. Witwicky: So?
Sam: A-minus. It’s an A, though.
Mr. Witwicky: Wait, wait, wait. I can’t see. It’s an A.
Sam: So I’m good.
Mr. Witwicky: You’re good.
[He drove his son to a car sale.]
Mr. Witwicky: I got a little surprise for you, son.
Sam: What kind of s...
Mr. Witwicky: Yeah, a little surprise.
[Unfortunately, they drove past a car sale that had lots of fancy vehicles.]
Sam: No. No, no, no, no! Dad! Oh, you got to be kidding me.
Mr. Witwicky: Yeah. I am. You're not getting a Porsche. [laughs]
Sam: You think that's funny?
Mr. Witwicky: Yeah, I think it's funny.
Sam: What's wrong with you?
Mr. Witwicky: You think I'd really get you a Porsche? For your first car?
Sam: I don't want to talk to you for the rest of this whole thing.
Mr. Witwicky: Oh, come on. It's just a practical joke. (laughs)
Sam: It's not a funny joke.
[They went to a car sale filled with old cars, much to Sam’s dismay.]
Bolivia: Manny!
Manny: What?
Bolivia: Get your cousin out of that damn clown suit. He's having a heat stroke again. Scaring white folks.
Bolivia's Cousin: I'm hot. Make-up's melting. It hurts my eyes.
[On the Witwickys...]
Sam: Here? No, no, no, what is this? You said- you said half a car, not half a piece of crap, dad.
Mr. Witwicky: When I was your age, I'd have been happy with four wheels and an engine.
Sam: Okay, let me explain something to you. Okay? You ever see 40-Year-Old Virgin?
Mr. Witwicky: Yeah.
Sam: Okay, that’s what this is. And this is the 50-year-old virgin.
Mr. Witwicky: Ah, okay.
Sam: You want me to live that life? Hmm?
Mr. Witwicky: No sacrifice…
Sam: Yeah, No victory.
Mr. Witwicky: No victory.
Sam: You know, I got it. The old Witwicky motto, Dad.
Mr. Witwicky: Right.
[Bolivia comes over to the two.]
Bolivia: Gentlemen. Bobby Bolivia, like the country, except without the runs. (laughs) How can I help you?
Mr. Witwicky: Well, my son here… looking to buy his first car.
Bolivia: You come to see me?
Sam: I had to.
Bolivia: That practically makes us family. Uncle Bobby B, baby. Uncle Bobby B.
Sam: Sam.
Bolivia: Sam, let me talk to you. Sam, your first enchilada of freedom awaits underneath one of those hoods. Let me tell you something, son. A driver don't pick the car. The car'll pick the driver.
Sam: Mm.
Bolivia: It's a mystical bond between man and machine. Son, I'm a lot of things, but a liar's not one of them.
Sam: Mm.
Bolivia: Especially not in front of my mammy. That's my mammy. Hey, Mammy! Ooh, don't be like that. If I had a rock, I'd bust your head, girl. I tell you, man, she deaf, you know? (laughs) Well, over here, every piece of car a man might want or need.
[Sam spots a yellow and black car.]
Sam: This ain’t bad. This one’s got racing stripes.
Bolivia: Yeah. It got racing... Yeah, what's this? What the heck is this? I don't know nothing about this car. Manny!
Manny: What?
Bolivia: What is this? This car! Check it out!
Manny: I don't know, boss! I've never seen it! That's loco!
Bolivia: Don't go Ricky Ricardo on me, Manny! Find out!
[Sam went inside the car and sat on the driver’s seat.]
Sam: Feels good.
[He sees a robot symbol in the middle of the driver’s wheel.]
Mr. Witwicky: How much?
Bolivia: Well, considering the semi-classic nature of the vehicle, with the slick wheels and the custom paint job...
Sam: Yeah, but the paint's faded.
Bolivia: Y-yeah, but it's custom.
Sam: It's custom faded?
Bolivia: Well, this is your first car. I wouldn't expect you to understand. Five grand.
Mr. Witwicky: No, I’m not paying over four. Sorry.
Bolivia: (to Sam) Kid, come on, get out. Get out the car.
Sam: No, no, no. You said cars pick their drivers.
Bolivia: Well, sometimes they pick a driver with a cheap-ass father. Out the car. (coughs) Now, this one here for four Gs is a beaut.
[Sam got out of the car.]
Mr. Witwicky: There’s a Fiesta with racing stripes over there.
Sam: No, I don’t want a Fiesta with racing stripes.
Bolivia: This is a classic engine right here. I sold a car the other day...
[Sam closed the door on the car with stripes, but it hits the other car with the passenger door.]
Mr. Witwicky: Geez. Holy cow.
Bolivia: No, no, no. No worries.
Mr. Witwicky: You alright?
Bolivia: I'll get a sledgehammer and knock this right out. Hey, hey, Manny! Get your clown cousin and get some hammers and come bang this stuff out, baby! (laughs)
Radio: Greater than man…
Bolivia: That one’s my favorite, drove all the way from Alabamy.
Radio: Go…
[The car sounded off an incredibly loud alarm, breaking every glass of every car. With every car’s window destroyed, the exhausted salesman gave in.]
Bolivia: (gasping) Four thousand!
[At Washington D.C., there was a board meeting.]
Keller: Steve.
Steve: Hello, Mr. Secretary.
Keller: They're so young.
Officer: They're the top subject matter experts, sir. NSA's recruiting right out of high school these days.
Bearded Analyst: Guys... that's the Secretary of Defense.
Male Analyst: I am so underdressed.
Steve: Ladies and gentlemen, the Secretary of Defense.
Keller: Please be seated. I'm John Keller. Obviously, you're wondering why you're here, so, these are the facts. At 1900 local time yesterday, the SOCCENT Forward Operations Base in Qatar was attacked. So far as we know, there were no survivors. The objective of the attack was to hack our military network. We're not sure exactly what they're after, but we do know that they were cut off during the assault, which would lead us to assume that they're going to try it again. Now, no one's taken responsibility for the attack. And the only real lead we have, so far, is this sound.
[He plays the recording, which gives off a robotic sound.]
Keller: That's the signal that hacked our network. NSA's working at full capacity to analyze it and intercept further communications but we need your help to find out who did this. Now, you've all shown considerable ability in the area of signals analysis. We're on a hair-trigger here, people. The President has dispatched battle groups to the Persian Gulf and Yellow Sea. This is as real as it's ever gonna get. Now I'm gonna leave you to your officer-in-charge. You'll break up into teams and you'll start your work. Good luck. To us all.
[Soon, Sam drives Mikaela to her house.]
Sam: There it is.
Mikaela: I had fun. Um. So, you know, thanks for listening.
Sam: Oh, yeah, yeah.
Mikaela: You- you think I'm shallow?
Sam: I think you're... No. No, no, no. I think there's a lot more than meets the eye with you.
Mikaela: Okay. (chuckles)
Sam: Yeah.
Mikaela: All right, I'll see you at school.
Sam: All right. (Mikaela gets out of the car) That's stupid... that was a stupid line. There's more than meets the eye with you. Stupid. Oh God. (chuckles) Oh my God. I love my car.
[Meanwhile, in the Pentagon, they were wondering about the metallic noise from the airbase attack.]
Bearded Analyst: Hey, guys, I think the other team figured it out. Iran.
Male Analyst: Come on, man. This is way too smart for Iranian scientists, eh? Think about it.
Spectacled Analyst: What do you think, kid? Chinese?
Maggie: No way. This is nothing like what the Chinese are using.
[At Air Force One...]
Officer: This is Air Force One. Level of flight, level three-three-zero.
Keller: (on the TV screen) We will hunt down this enemy. And when we do, we'll know just what to do with them.
[Under a seat, a boombox transformed into a small robot and lurked around.]
Announcer: Apparently, there are very few survivors...
Tracy: Yes, Mr. President?
President of USA: Yeah, can you wrangle me up some Ding Dongs, darling?
[The robot hid in the elevator as Tracy looks for some Ding Dongs.]
Tracy: I joined the Air Force to bring the man Ding Dongs. I'll be in storage.
[She noticed the boombox in the elevator and took it to the storage room with her. She placed it on the table and went to get a Ding Dong from the fridge. She unwraps one, and it fell and rolled across the floor.]
Tracy: Oh, shoot.
[The Ding-Dong rolled near the robot. She picks it up from the floor and took a bite.]
Tracy: Oh, gross.
[As soon as she left, the robot got to work on hacking the system which was connected to the Pentagon.]
Maggie: (hears something in her headphones) Do you hear that? Are you getting this? I think they’re hacking our network again.
[The computer picked up a foreign signal.]
Male Analyst: Uh oh.
[The robot then hacks the files to find Project Iceman. He found it and starts to transfer the files to the bot. Meanwhile, Maggie found the same signal that she picked up.]
Maggie: Oh, my God. This is a direct match to the signal in Qatar. Are you running a diagnostic?
Male Analyst: Should I be?
Maggie: Yes, you should.
Male Analyst: So I am.
[The robot then initializing the file and start uploading a virus.]
Maggie: Someone! They're hacking into Air Force One! We need a senior analyst. I think they're planting a virus.
Spectacled Officer: A virus?
Male Analyst: It's streaming right now.
Maggie: They are planting a virus and stealing a whole lot of data from your system at the same time.
Pentagon Officer: Code Red. We have a breach. Air Force One, someone onboard has breached the military network.
Agent: I'm in the cargo hold. Clear. Clear.
[The robot was still getting the files.]
Maggie: You got to cut the hard lines.
Spectacled Officer: What?
Maggie: Whatever they want, they are getting it.
Pentagon Officer: Sir? Permission to take down the Defense Network.
Spectacled Officer: Cut all server hard lines now.
Pentagon Officer: Cut all server hard lines now.
[Soon, the robot wasn’t able to get the files since they shut down the hard lines. However, the robot then sees something that is related to a Witwicky and it was the same guy that had an expedition in 1895. The robot head bangs the screen as the agent arrived.]
Agent: Someone's tampered with the POTUS mainframe. What the hell...
[He shoots at the robot, but it fires blades at the agents, killing them.]
Air Force Officer: Shots fired in the underdeck. Repeat, shots fired. Crew, prepare for emergency descent.
[The robot turned into a boombox to hide from the agents.]
Keller: I want our President in that bunker. And I don't want to discuss a damn thing other till that becomes reality. That's our first priority, that's our only priority right now.
Officer: Air Force One is on the ground.
[Soon, the police arrived as the robot sneaks out of the plane, through the crowd and into a Decepticon police car which was known as Barricade.]
Frenzy: (speaks in Cybertronian) Stupid insects tried to shoot me. (growls, then makes chittering sounds) Found a clue to the AllSpark. Witwicky man - he has seen our language. Witwicky search
[The robot found something on the computer as he found the glasses being sold by Ladiesman217 a.k.a. Sam Witwicky.]
Frenzy: (speaks in Cybertronian) We must find LadiesMan217. Go, go, go.
The police car drove off to look for Sam Witwicky.
[Later, Keller makes a special statement on television.]
Keller: Gentlemen, the President has ordered Sector Seven... be terminated and the remains of the dead aliens- disposed of. The Laurentian Abyss is seven miles below sea level, deepest place on our planet. The massive depth and pressure there, coupled with subfreezing temperatures, would crush and entomb them, leaving no evidence.
[The broken Decepticons were dumped into the ocean, forever to sink into the water below. Meanwhile, Lennox came home to reunite with his wife and baby daughter. Sam and Mikaela were seen on top of Bumblebee as Optimus overlooks the sunset.]
Optimus Prime: (voiceover) With the AllSpark gone, we cannot return life to our planet. But fate has yielded its reward: a new world to call home. We live among its people now, hiding in plain sight, but watching over them in secret, waiting...protecting. I have witnessed their capacity for courage, and though we are worlds apart, like us, there's more to them than meets the eye. I am Optimus Prime, and I send this message to any surviving Autobots taking refuge among the stars: We are here. We are waiting.
[Roll credits.]
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