Crash Bandicoot 4: It's About Time script

This page is comprised of all cutscenes and quotes in Crash Bandicoot 4: It's About Time.
Notes:
*Each cutscene is in chronological order of appearance in regular gameplay. Exceptions include cutscenes and lines from timeline levels, which are sorted into their positions in terms of level order.
**Lines repeated in timeline levels are not re-transcribed.
*Lines are sorted by the dimensional hubs they appear in, with the exception of the bonus endings, flashback tapes, and credits, which aren't linked to any one hub.
*Lines listed with bullet points play at random (rather than sequentially) when a given condition is met.
*Cinematic cutscenes are marked with (C), in-game voice lines are marked with (L), and transitory cutscenes that take place on the map screen are marked with (M).
==N. Sanity Island (Present Day)==
===Rude Awakening===
====Intro (C)====
[The game begins on a close up of Neo Cortex's eye, which slowly zooms out to reveal a fiery backdrop.]
Cortex: "Crash Bandicoot. At last I, the great Neo Cortex, have you right where I want you... And now the final blow! Nyugh!"
[Cortex smacks at the bandicoot in front of him with his weapon, revealing the bandicoot to be little more than a doll resembling Crash, and Cortex's weapon to be merely a stick. N. Tropy glares at Cortex over his shoulder.]
N. Tropy: "Hush, simpleton!"
Uka Uka: "Hyuuuurgh-ahhh!"
[There is a strained yelling as Uka Uka attempts to open a rift back to the present. Rocks begin to float in front of him, with a bright green light forming in the area. He pauses to regain his strength, letting the rocks fall.]
Cortex: "Face it, N. Tropy, it's going to fail. Again."
[Cortex points at a nearby rock with his stick, revealing a tally that reaches a count of 22 drawn onto the rock.]
N. Tropy: "At least Uka Uka and I attempt to free us from this prison! I won't sit idly by and listen to your inane ramblings for another decade!"
[Tropy leans forward, getting in Cortex's face.]
N. Tropy: "And the way you chew."
[Cortex glares and raises a finger, but before he can respond, the scientists are interrupted by more yelling from Uka Uka.]
Uka Uka: "Hyuuuahhhhhhh!!! Ahuugh!"
[With one final push and a blue flash of light, Uka Uka succeeds in opening a dimensional rift, causing him to fall to the ground with a soft groan. Cortex nervously approaches the mask and pokes him with the stick.]
Cortex: "Is he dead?"
N. Tropy: "Leave him. He's served his purpose. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!"
[As N. Tropy is laughing, the camera zooms closer to the rift until we see nothing but pitch black, with the game's logo suddenly revealing itself. There is then a fade to N. Sanity Island, revealing Aku Aku floating by a beach. He senses something is amiss.]
Aku Aku: "A great power has awoken."
[Aku Aku floats over to Crash, who is fast asleep on a couch.]
Aku Aku: "Crash, I fear it portends an event of reality-shattering proportions. I feel it emanating from N. Sanity Peak. Quickly, we must go!"
[Crash listens for a moment, but falls back asleep while Aku is still talking. Aku Aku frowns in annoyance.]
Aku Aku: "Crash. Crash! CRASH!"
[Crash finally wakes up, flying off the couch and falling to the ground in shock.]
====Aku Aku's commentary (L)====
Aku Aku: "Crash! Quickly, we must go!"
Aku Aku: "Ha ha haaa!"
====Jungle Spirits (C)====
[Crash approaches the edge of a platform overlooking N. Sanity Peak. He puts his hands on his hips and takes in the view for a moment, only for a gang of Jungle Spirits to appear behind him, scaring him and making him fall off the edge.]
===N. Sanity Peak===
====Lani-Loli (C)====
[Crash slowly approaches a pedestal with a sleeping mask resting on top. Out of curiosity, he picks up the mask and examines it. He flinches awake, and stares at Crash for a moment before the floor gives way, sending both plummeting down. Lani-Loli looks up and stammers in worry as the Guardian emerges from over a nearby gate. Crash gets up and turns around, only to be frozen in fear when he notices the spectre. Lani-Loli turns and speeds away.]
Lani-Loli: "Ahhhh ahhh ahhh ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!"
====The Rift Generator (C)====
[Crash quickly catches up with Lani-Loli, right at the edge of a cliff. Crash and Lani-Loli's escape from the Guardian is short-lived, as it begins to emerge from the cave. Crash looks off into the abyss below, then back at Lani-Loli.]
Lani-Loli: "Ah ah no, no-no-no no way! Not in million yea—"
[Crash jumps off and grabs Lani-Loli, causing them both to fall.]
Lani-Loli: "Yeaaaaaaaargh!"
[Somewhere at the bottom of the peak, Coco is checking her tablet with Aku Aku when Crash and Lani-Loli land beside them. Crash gets up with Lani-Loli stuck on his face.]
Lani-Loli: "Yiiii! Get him off get him off get him off!"
Coco: "Crash? Who is that?"
Aku Aku: "Lani-Loli? If the Quantum Masks have returned then..."
[Lani-Loli sucessfully detaches from Crash's face and floats over to Aku Aku.]
Lani-Loli: "Ack! Ack! Ack! Hey Aku, how's it g-g-gah?! Is that a QUANTUM RIFT?!"
[Lani-Loli hyperventilates as a large purple tear in reality is revealed behind Aku Aku and Coco.]
Coco: "It appears to be a door between dimensions."
[Lani-Loli darts in front of the rift.]
Lani-Loli: "Yes! Yes! The kind we keep shut! We have to go through, find my siblings, and fix this before some putz with a big evil plan and a bigger ego does something monumentally stupid!"
[Scene wipes to Cortex scratching his butt, yawning. He steps out of the way of the camera, revealing N. Tropy standing before his Rift Generator.]
N. Tropy: "Uka Uka unknowingly paved the way for our bright future. Once my Rift Generator is complete, dominion over all of time and space will be within our grasp!"
[Cortex silently mocks N. Tropy before starting to tinker with a device as N. Gin and N. Brio approach him from behind.]
Cortex: "N. Gin, N. Brio... you had some little projects you wanted to tell me about?"
N. Gin: "Master, my mechanical marvel will hypnotize you an army!"
N. Brio: "And my potion will make me — ahem — them unstoppable!"
Neo Cortex: "Right, yeah, fine, sure. Have fun with your... ray guns, or whatever."
[As N. Gin and N. Brio turn to head to their respective rifts, they bump into each other. N. Brio angrily tries to kick N. Gin, only for N. Gin to dodge and bite down on his shin.]
N. Tropy: "Hasten your steps!"
[The two jump apart and scamper off to their rifts. The camera cuts to a close-up of N. Tropy's face.]
N. Tropy: "By my calculations, our enemies are already moving against us. And We. Will. Prevail."
===The dimensional map (M)===
[Crash and Lani-Loli appear upon the Dimensional Map, standing over the space for N. Sanity Peak. Lani-Loli looks to the side then disappears as a path to the next dimension, the Hazardous Wastes, appears.]
==The Hazardous Wastes (2084)==
===A Real Grind===
====N. Gin (C)====
[Crash, Coco, and Lani-Loli arrive at the Hazardous Wastes through a quantum rift, Crash landing flat on his face in the sand before climbing to his feet.]
Coco: "So, we need the other masks to close the rifts?"
Lani-Loli: "Correct! Now, my brother Akano is around here somewhere..."
[N. Gin flies into view on a jetpack.]
N. Gin: "Welcome to the show, vermin! Looking for your precious mask?"
Lani-Loli: "Ahh... behold, the aforementioned putz."
Coco: "Don't worry. We have a thing where we fight, he loses. It's a well-established dynamic."
N. Gin: "Not this time! I've got a backstage pass for you to get up close and personal with my weapon of mass percussion! Come ready to rock!"
[N. Gin makes horn signs with his hands as he flies out of view.]
====Speakerphone announcements (L)====
N. Gin: "Tonight, live at the War Palace... get ready for a KILLER performance!"
N. Gin: "Ehehehe chomp chomp!"
N. Gin: "You think you're so great with your stupid grin on your stupid face. Stupid!"
N. Gin: "Enough with the jumping already! Showoff."
N. Gin: "Minion! Leave behind nothing but a smoking crater!"
N. Gin: "Greasemonkey Gazette raves: A DEADLY display that will BLOW your mind (and body, into pieces)."
N. Gin: "A performance so electrifying you may just spontaneously combust! Or, uh, not-so-spontaneously..."
N. Gin: "We're just getting started. Ehehehehe!"
====N. Gin settles in (M)====
[As Crash returns to the Dimensional Map, N. Gin flies in on his jet pack. He lands on the other side of the Hazardous Wastes, next to where an unknown mask is sleeping.]
N. Gin: "Ya-ha-ha!"
===Crash Compactor===
====Speakerphone announcements (L)====
N. Gin: "Scurry scurry little rats, or you'll miss the show!"
N. Gin: "Admittance to tonight's performance is free. First come, first TORN TO SHREDS!"
N. Gin: "Let's see that blood spray!"
N. Gin: "Frank! Filthy rodent! Kill my favorite minion will you?!"
N. Gin: "Just make it quick this time."
N. Gin: "You paid for the whole seat, but you'll only need the edge because this show will MELT YOUR FACE OFF!"
===Hit the Road===
====Speakerphone announcements (L)====
N. Gin: "The show of the century! Tonight, 10pm, and 6 feet under!"
N. Gin: "You're gonna be right on time... if you don't become roadkill first!"
N. Gin: "A spectacle so incredible you won't believe your eyes, or ears, or failing internal organs!"
N. Gin: "The best show you'll ever see! The LAST show you'll ever see! Ehehehe."
====Doom Rig (L)====
??? (Tawna): "Oh yeah!"
N. Gin: "Are you ready? Start! Your!" 
[The engine rumbles to life, but the Doom Rig is held back.]
N. Gin: "Bwaaah?! Sabotage!"
====Final speakerphone announcement (L)====
N. Gin: "Run run Vroom vroom! Ehehehehehe!"
N. Gin: "What's taking you imbeciles so long?! Your target's caged for cripes sake!"
====Weapon Of Mass Percussion (M)====
[As Crash approaches N. Gin on the Dimensional Map, the W.O.M.P. behind him whirrs to life and begins beating its drums.]
===Truck Stopped===
====Tawna's commentary (L)====
Tawna: "Okay, this place rules!"
Tawna: "Whoa! Rad chainsaw!"
====Speakerphone announcement (L)====
N. Gin: "Attention minions, the bandicoots are in sight! Start the Doom Rig!"
====Tawna's sabotage (C)====
[Tawna pulls herself up onto the top of the Doom Rig with a grunt. She briefly looks around before noticing a large hook hanging from the ceiling above the truck.]
Tawna: "A-ha!"
[Tawna pulls the hook down and attaches it to a segment of pipe on top of the truck. She quickly runs and leaps off the side of the Doom Rig as its engines roar to life.]
===Stage Dive===
====Opening cutscene (C)====
N. Gin: "Alright, all you bloodthirsty lunatics! Put your freaky little hands together for... RAWK-IT HEAD!"
[The Weapon of Mass Percussion activates as the audience cheers. N. Gin taps his drumsticks together.]
N. Gin: "1, 2, 1 2 3 4!"
====Battle quotes (L)====
;Round 1
N. Gin: "Prepare for a beat-ing, bandicoots!"
N. Gin: "You're ruining my solo!"
N. Gin: "Stop it stop it stop it stop it!"
N. Gin: "Stay away from my robot! He's fragile."
;Round 2
N. Gin: "What's the matter, don't like DEATH METAL?"
N. Gin: "My equipment!"
N. Gin: "No bandicoots allowed on the drums!"
;Round 3
N. Gin: "Gaaaah! The show must go on!"
N. Gin: "Paws off the stereo!"
N. Gin: "You really know how to make me mad!"
;Round 4
N. Gin: "Argh! Fine! We'll do this the hard way."
N. Gin: "Quit breaking my things!"
N. Gin: "Will you stop interrupting my set?!"
;If Crash/Coco is killed
N. Gin: "Ehehehe!"
====N. Gin Defeated (C)====
[The Weapon of Mass Percussion's cockpit explodes.]
N. Gin: "Noooooo!"
[A second explosion sends N. Gin flying.]
N. Gin: "Ahhhhhhh!"
[N. Gin falls out of the sky and tumbles to the ground.]
N. Gin: "Ow! Ow! Ow..."
[Crash, Coco, and Lani-Loli laugh at N. Gin.]
N. Gin: "My beautiful creation..."
[Akano falls out of the mech and onto N. Gin's head, knocking him unconscious before bouncing into the rift.]
Lani-Loli: "Ahhh! Akano!"
[Crash, Coco, and Lani-Loli run through the rift after Akano.]
====Off to sea (M)====
[Akano is knocked away from his resting place on the Dimensional Map and is sent flying to the next dimension, coming to rest at the far side of it. A path appears between the two dimensions.]
==Salty Wharf (1717)==
===Thar He Blows!===
====Dingodile's commentary (L)====
Dingodile: "Uh. Got a feelin' I'm not in the bayou no more."
Dingodile: "You smell good enough to eat. Hehe!"
====Cannon Fired (C)====
[Dingodile destroys a gate with a TNT barrel, revealing a quantum rift behind it. He grins, only to gasp as he notices that the explosion lit the wick of a nearby pile of gunpowder barrels.]
Dingodile: "Uh-oh."
[Dingodile books it into the rift as the barrels explode, setting off a nearby cannon which fires a cannonball down into the pirate town below.]
===Booty Calls===
====Keel-hauled (M)====
[As Crash and Coco go to enter the next level on the dimensional map, they are caught in a snare and left hanging upside down from a ship's mast.]
Coco: "Aaagh!"
[A Pi-Rat leaps out, jumping up and down and swinging their cutlass at the bandicoots triumphantly. A quantum rift opens in the background, and an unknown bandicoot leaps out of it. The bandicoot grapples onto the mast of the ship with a grappling hook and stomps the Pi-Rat away before jumping into the level.]
===Hook, Line, and Sinker===
====A Familiar Face (C)====
[Crash and Coco are tied together by a thick rope, hung upside down on a pirate ship. The camera pans back to reveal an unknown bandicoot perched on the mast of another nearby ship.]
??? (Tawna): "Hang on, guys! I'm coming!"
[The bandicoot springs into action.]
====Tawna's commentary (L)====
??? (Tawna): "Woo-hoo-hoo!"
??? (Tawna): "Eyes on target."
====Tawna (C)====
[The bandicoot uses a cutlass to cut the rope, freeing Crash and Coco. The bandicoot siblings fall to the floor before climbing to their feet.]
Coco: "Thank you so much — wait. Tawna?! But you're... different!"
[Crash leaps around, looking at Tawna from different angles in confusion and poking at her forehead before she punches him in the head.]
Coco: "You're not from our universe!"
[Tawna points and winks in confirmation.]
Tawna: "It's good to see you guys. It's been a long time for me."
[Crash gets up and walks back over to Coco, shaking his head dizzily.]
Coco: "We lost touch in your universe too, huh?"
[Tawna turns away and fiddles with the cutlass nervously.]
Tawna: "Yeah... you could say that."
Coco: "Hehehe, what'd we like, die or something?"
[Tawna whirls back around.]
Tawna: "What? No! Nope! No! What! Ha! No! Definitely not! So how are things in your dimension? Ahem."
Coco: "The usual. A bunch of evil scientists attempting interdimensional domination."
Tawna: "Huh! So uh, watcha collecting? Crystals? Gems?"
Coco: "Masks!"
Tawna: "Ooh, fun. Well, good luck with that."
[Tawna turns and slowly walks away.]
Coco: "Wait, you're not coming?"
Tawna: "Sorry, I fly solo. But I'll-I'll lend a hand where I can. In fact, I already have..."
[Tawna pulls out her hookshot and swings away. The bandicoot siblings stare after her in disappointment, Crash putting a reassuring hand on Coco's shoulder.]
====Louise awakens (M)====
[As our intrepid bandicoot emerges from the level, four pink tentacles rear out of the water in the distance and begin writhing in the air.]
===Jetboard Jetty===
====Akano (C)====
[Akano rests on top of a worn wooden table, eyes closed in silent slumber. Crash approaches the table, Coco and Lani-Loli close behind, and examines the mask before attempting to pick him up.]
Lani-Loli: "Akano! Old Dark Matter himself! Careful, Crash, he's heavier than he—"
[Crash accidentally drops Akano, who lands on his foot.]
Crash: "Ahhhhhh!"
[He leaps backwards to yank his foot out from under Akano, grabbing onto him and hopping up and down in pain. Coco covers her mouth with one hand. Akano wakes up and floats up into the air above the table.]
Lani-Loli: "Oh, good, you're awake."
[Akano slowly floats forward, silently glaring down at the bandicoot siblings. They stare back in fear, apprehensive.]
Lani-Loli: "Alright! Two masks down, two to go! Feeling a little less panicked. I was at a 10 before, now I'm at a solid... let's say 9.78888."
[Lani-Loli pops up between Akano and the bandicoots.]
Lani-Loli: "Oh yeah, these bandicoots are here to help!"
Akano: "Ban-di-coot. ...hmm. Follow."
[Akano turns and slowly floats away into a nearby quantum rift.]
Lani-Loli: "Short and to the point. Love this guy!"
[Crash and Coco smile at each other before following the two masks through the rift.]
==Tranquility Falls (1402)==
===Give It a Spin===
====N. Brio (C)====
[The trio next arrives in Tranquility Falls. Coco and Lani-Loli successfully leave the rift, but it begins to close on Crash, causing him to briefly get stuck before being launched into a nearby gong. Coco covers her ears from the sound, but Lani-Loli, handless, can only cringe on the spot. Crash dizzily stumbles back over to his friends.]
Coco: "So where's the next mask?"
Lani-Loli: "Not here." 
[Lani-Loli floats backwards down the path as he explains the situation to the bandicoots, not noticing a green-clothed figure emerging from behind a wall behind him.]
Lani-Loli: "If these chucklenuts weren't punching holes in reality, we could open our own rifts. For now we're stuck taking the long route. But I sense another rift around here somewhere... Ahhhhh!"
[N. Brio's sudden appearance makes Lani-Loli fly backwards into Crash's arms. Crash is confused for a moment before he notices N. Brio too, making him jump into Coco's arms in fright, still holding Lani-Loli. Coco frowns in annoyance. N. Brio grins and wields a purple potion.]
N. Brio: "Friends! I have a fun little game for you to play! I've got a reward for the clever bandicoots who can reach my testing grounds... but you'll have to defeat my deadly diabolical creations along the way! Muahahahaha!"
[N. Brio throws an explosive potion at his feet, disappearing in the blast.]
====Potion messages (L)====
N. Brio: "Sooo, it's been a while. Whatcha been up to? Oh, me? Mostly the same... mixing potions, brewing potions, drinking potions, t-t-testing potions..."
N. Brio: "This dimension was quite p-p-peaceful when I arrived. Unfortunately my p-p-potions had some... murderous effects on the inhabitants. (sigh) All the better to t-t-test you with... muahahaha!"
N. Brio: "Hmm... that's what I've always liked about you! So dedicated to science. Not like the natives here, unwilling to cooperate with even a simple d-d-deadly test."
N. Brio: "I wish I didn't have to resort to live tests for my experiments, but, you know... omelets, eggs. Super powered potions, marsupia—uhh, I mean... other animals.
====Brio takes residence (M)====
[Back on the Dimensional Map, N. Brio appears at the far side of Tranquility Falls under the cover of a green smoke potion.]
N. Brio: "Muhuhahaha! Ha!"
===Potion Commotion===
====Tawna's commentary (L)====
Tawna: "Reminds me of Neo Nippon... minus the kaiju tanuki."
Tawna: "Awwww, kawaii!"
====Vs. N. Brio (C)====
[N. Brio chuckles from a small rooftop, watching the bandicoot standing by the door below. He raises his arm and prepares to throw a potion. Suddenly, Tawna appears from behind him.]
Tawna: "Hey!"
N. Brio: "Daaah!"
[N. Brio flinches, throwing off his aim and making him throw the potion at the door instead of his intended target, causing the door to open. N. Brio snarls in frustration as Tawna cracks her knuckles and readies her fists for a fight. N. Brio whirls around, only to throw another smoke potion at his feet, vanishing within the blast.]
===Draggin' On===
====Potion messages (L)====
N. Brio: "Ah, look at us, just like the old days... working together against those who keep us down and humiliate us by forcing us to pick out our own birthday card and sign them from him! I-I-I-I-I mean... he could have at least paid half!"
N. Brio: "I can't say I see the appeal of all that jumping you do... but perhaps I don't have the right body for it. ...Yet."
N. Brio: "Sometimes I think you're my only f-f-friends. And then I realize... no, that's right."
====Ascending (M)====
[Back on the Dimensional Map, as the bandicoots progress higher up Tranquility Falls, bizzare floating buildings lower down from the sky.]
===Off-Balance===
====Potion messages (L)====
N. Brio: "Any guesses on your r-r-reward? I'll give you a hint: it's something you've had before! Muahahahaha!"
N. Brio: "Once I perfect my p-p-potion I'll be strong enough to defeat anyone! Even C-C-C-Corte—ahahahahahaha! I just need to test my might against... a formidable foe."
N. Brio: "We make a good team. If you survive my trial — uhhh... if you enjoy your reward — we will... make... an even better team. Uh-huh. Yes, heh."
N. Brio: "Yes, hurry! Your reward is just up ahead!"
===Trouble Brewing===
====Opening cutscene (C)====
[Crash and Coco run into an arena, where N. Brio stands waiting on a platform in front of a gong just above.]
N. Brio: "Muhahahahaha! Oh good, you've arrived! And now for your reward!"
====Battle quotes (L)====
;Round 1
N. Brio: "Just stay put while I test this."
N. Brio: "Hold still!"
N. Brio: "For science!"
N. Brio: "Stop spinning! You’re making me d-d-d-dizzy!"
N. Brio: "Not the face!"
;Round 2
N. Brio: "I just need to know if this is lethal!"
N. Brio: (laugh) "Fly, my gelatinous puppets!"
N. Brio: "Fiddlesticks!"
;Round 3
N. Brio: "Enjoy your trip!"
N. Brio: "This one has extra b-bo-b-botulinum!"
N. Brio: "Yes, ooze your way to victory!"
N. Brio: "No!"
N. Brio: "Why?!"
N. Brio: "Why don't people take me seriously?"
;Monster stunned
N. Brio: "Hup!"
;Monster knocked back
N. Brio: "Hyak!"
;Monster knocked off-field
N. Brio: "Hrnh?"
N. Brio: "Graa!"
;Monster returns to field
N. Brio: "Hyngh!"
;If Crash/Coco is killed
*N. Brio: "Muahaha! More!"
*N. Brio: (laugh) "Yes!"
*N. Brio: "Experiment: success! Muahaha!"
*N. Brio: "Success!"
*N. Brio: "Muhahahaha, ah... aw."
====N. Brio Defeated (C)====
[N. Brio, in his monster form, screams as he plummets off the side of the arena, landing on a stone platform. A green beaker falls and lands on top of him, shattering and covering him in its contents. Crash and Coco stare down at him for a moment before turning and walking away triumphantly.]
Coco: "Yeah!"
Crash: "Haha!"
[The two flinch and whirl around in surprise as something rises up from the darkness behind them. N. Brio lands near the edge of the arena, now in the form of a pterodactyl.]
N. Brio: "And now for my final t-t-test. Taste my reptilian wrath!"
[N. Brio suddenly flinches and groans, folding his wings over his stomach.
N. Brio: "...my cloaca... Bwaa!?"
[N. Brio opens his wings and flinches back, revealing a freshly laid egg on the floor between his legs.]
N. Brio: "Ughhh... oww... oohh..."
[N. Brio quickly flies away, whimpering and groaning in embarrassment. Coco stares after Brio in shock, only for Crash to run behind her and triumphantly hold up the egg.]
Crash: "Bah-bada-bah!"
Coco: "Let's get out of here."
[Coco grabs Crash by the arm and drags him out of the arena as he still clings on to the egg.]
====N. Verting (M)====
[N. Brio, still a Pterodactyl, flaps up into the sky and begins flying back down towards Salty Wharf. As he flies, he drops Bumpa Berries and N. Verted Gems on each level, squawking as he goes. After he leaves, the next dimension appears.]
==Mosquito Marsh (A Few Days Ago)==
===Off Beat===
====Dingodile's turn====
[The bandicoot proceeds forwards through Mosquito Marsh to where Dingodile is taking a nap, resting on his tail and hugging his Vaccuum Cannon to his chest. When approached, Dingodile startles awake with a yell.]
Dingodile: "Wah! Oh yeah!"
[Dingodile leaps into the level.]
===Home Cookin'===
====Dingo's Diner (C)====
[On the boardwalks of Mosquito Marsh, Dingodile's stroll is interrupted as he whiffs a delicious scent on the breeze and his stomach growls loudly.]
Dingodile: "Ohoho, crikey, I'm starved! Wait, is that...? (sniff) Roadkill Pie? (sniff) Slug and centipede gumbo? (sniff) Braised bat tacos with gaunamole!?"
[Dingodile starts running down the boardwalk, following the scent as he speaks. The camera turns to reveal the source of the smell: Dingodile's very own eatery, Dingo's Diner.]
Dingodile: "Well now, what have we got here?"
[The camera cuts to a small CRT TV, revealing that the preceding scene was a commercial all along. Dingodile on the ad mugs the camera, speaking directly to the audience.]
Dingodile: "Tired of that vile swill Papa Batfield cooks up in his filthy outhouse? C'mon down to Dingo's Diner!"
[Dingodile winks at the camera as the narrator begins to read out a disclaimer. He awkwardly attempts to hold his cheesy grin as the narrator drones on and on.]
Disclaimer: "Food served at Dingo's Diner may not meet the legal definition of 'food'. Consume at your own risk."
[It is revealed that the TV was inside of Dingodile's trailer home the entire time, with the dingo-croc himself watching the advert, half-awake on his armchair.]
Disclaimer: "Side effects of dining at Dingo's diner may include fatigue, increased body odor, risk-seeking behavior..."
[Dingodile jumps to full alertness and turns to look out of the window.]
Disclaimer: "...thinking too much about your uncle, increased hunger, decreased hunger, alienation from friends and family..."
[Dingodile is faced with a small gang of Wumpashiner Bats approaching his diner, carrying piles of explosives.]
Disclaimer: "...skin irritation, ennui, leaky orifices, oozing orifices, glowing orifices..."
Dingodile: "Oi, you buggers stay outta my diner!"
[Dingodile angrily punches the wall below the window before turning and running for the door.]
Disclaimer: "...additional orifices, gas, wumpa cheeks, remembering that girl from high school — what's she up to? Do you think she's happy?..."
[Dingodile rips his Vacuum Cannon off of the wall above the TV and gives it a test blast before bursting out of the door.]
Disclaimer: "...and profuse vomiting. No shirts, no shoes, no bats!"
====Dingodile's commentary (L)====
Dingodile: "Time for a spring cleanin'."
Dingodile: "Hmph! Jump on a TNT crate? What am I, a bandicoot?"
====Diner Destroyed (C)====
[Dingodile flinches as his diner explodes.]
Dingodile: "Argh! Bastards! I'll get every last one of yas!"
====More commentary (L)====
Dingodile: "Awww, I made all them tablecloths m'self..."
Dingodile: "There we are."
Dingodile: "Niiiice."
Dingodile: "Blimey!"
Dingodile: "Hahaha! How do you like them wumpas?"
====Dingo's Rift Travel (C)====
[Stood in the burning wreckage of the building he has just set alight, Dingodile hefts his Vacuum Cannon off of his shoulder and blows on the muzzle, only for a Quantum rift to open directly below him. He struggles to climb back out, but his Vacuum Cannon flies up and bounces on his head twice, sending him falling through.]
===No Dillo Dallying===
====Dingodile's commentary (L)====
Dingodile: "That's more like it. Now... which way's me diner?"
Dingodile: "Stagnant water, smells like home."
====Rift Travel (Again) (C)====
[Dingodile hops up the stair onto the top of the armadillo's food boat. He chuckles softly before breathing a sigh of relief, happy to be home. This joy is short-lived as another quantum rift opens up behind him, with the unaware armadillo still driving the boat straight for it. Dingodile screams and fruitlessly tries to run away, but he is sucked into the rift.]
Dingodile: "Crikey, not again!"
[Dingodile is finally sucked in. The boat proceeds forward under the dock, with the armadillo chef none the wiser.]
===Run It Bayou===
====Kupuna-Wa (C)====
[Kupuna-Wa floats on the spot in front of a food stand, softly snoring in her sleep. She yawns and wakes up as Crash, Coco and Lani-Loli approach her.]
Kupuna-Wa: "Wah? What time is it? Oh goodness, I ought to know... Crash! Coco! C'mon, give old Kupuna-Wa a kiss, eh? Ehehehe! Mwah!"
[Kupuna-Wa kisses Crash, with the poor bandicoot quickly fainting soon after. Coco stares at Kupuna-Wa, confused.]
Kupuna-Wa: "Don't look at me like I broke wind at a wedding. I'm Time! I see everything! And I mean everything."
[Crash gets back up, shaking his head dizzily.]
Kupuna-Wa: "There's some very unexpected developments in your future. Your very near future. SHOCKING events that will CHANGE THE COURSE OF YOUR LIFE—"
[Lani-Loli hastily darts in between Kupuna-Wa and the bandicoot siblings.]
Lani-Loli: "Yeah, just gonna stop you there before you tell us how we all die!"
Kupuna-Wa: "Well, if you'd rather not know about the GIANT, mask eating monster from beyond the stars..."
Lani-Loli: "Leaving now!"
[Lani-Loli quickly floats into the nearby Quantum Rift.]
Kupuna-Wa: "...that is your choice! Hehehee!"
[Kupuna-Wa and the two bandicoots slowly follow Lani-Loli through the rift.]
===Kupuna-Wa's guidance (M)===
Kupuna-Wa: "Right then! Need a hand?"
[With a flash, a new quantum rift opens, revealing the next dimension.]
==The 11th Dimension (1954)==
===Snow Way Out===
====Cortex's Warning (C)====
[Crash, Coco and Lani-Loli arrive in the 11th Dimension, jumping out of the rift onto a pier below. Coco safely lands on the wood, but Crash lands on a patch of ice, sending him sliding on his stomach. He looks up to see a hologram of Cortex.]
Cortex: "Crash Bandicoot! You banished me to the past, but all it did was give more time to plan your doom. You'll find me up the mountain. Don't freeze on the way!"
[The hologram disappears, and its projector flies off.]
Lani-Loli: "Wow, you know I'm sensing a real fraught history here. How many have you beaten this clown anyway?"
Coco: "Three."
Lani-Loli: "Really, only three?"
Crash: "Uh-huh."
Lani-Loli: "Funny, seemed like more..."
==== Cortex intervenes (C) ====
Cortex: Muahahahaha!
[A ruined ship in front of a bandicoot suddenly explodes.]
===Ship Happens===
====Cortex's commentary (L)====
Neo Cortex: "The bandicoots are en route. I must reach... the spot. Muhahaha!"
Neo Cortex: (singing) "On a cold winter's night, have yourself a bite, of bandicoot stew!"
====Ship Explodes (C)====
[Cortex reaches a lookout and looks down to see a bandicoot running to approach a ship suspended in front of a waterfall.]
Cortex: "Oh!"
[Cortex laughs evilly as he pulls out a remote with a large red button on it.]
Cortex: "Just a few more steps and you'll be bandicoot- Bar--barba-ACHOO!"
[Cortex's sneeze causes him to accidentally press down on the button.]
Cortex: "Aghhh!"
[Cortex looks up in horror, eye twitching.]
===Bears Repeating===
====Bear chase (L)====
Neo Cortex: "Oh how I've missed this!"
Neo Cortex: "Haha, how 'bout that?!"
Neo Cortex: "I'm having fun! Can you tell?"
Neo Cortex: "Hahahaha! Ha ha ha ha ha!"
===Building Bridges===
====Tawna's commentary (L)====
Tawna: "Brrrr! Must've left my jacket in the Bermuda Quadrangle... brrr!"
Tawna: "Brrr! Please let the next world be a beach world! Sunshine, sand, drinks with mini umbrellas... mmmm."
====Crates Set (C)====
[Tawna runs forward across the platform to a console with a giant yellow button with a grey double arrow on it.]
Tawna: "Hmm..."
[Tawna presses the button. A platform with a large stack of Nitro Crates on it is moved across the gap by pulleys and ropes, making it into a path.]
Tawna: "Hm!"
[She smiles in satisfaction.]
====Cold Pursuit (M)====
[Cortex flees the bandicoots down the snowy mountainside on his skiis, laughing silently when he reaches his airship.]
===4th Time's a Charm===
====Opening cutscene (C)====
[Crash and Coco face Cortex on the deck of his airship, where he sits in a large command center, levers in hand.]
Neo Cortex: "CRASH BANDICOOT. It's about time. This is going to be just like the old days... except this time everything will go according to my plan! Hahahahahahahaha!"
====Battle quotes (L)====
;Round 1
Neo Cortex: "I've made a few upgrades to my blimp. Muahahahaha!
Neo Cortex: "Rain of... giant deadly missiles!"
Neo Cortex: "Punchbot Mark 2, deploy!"
Neo Cortex: "Fun fact: Punchbot Mark 2 is 1 better at punching than Punchbot Mark 1."
Neo Cortex: "Oof!"
Neo Cortex: "Ow! Punchbot Mark 2 is for punching YOU, not ME! Raaa!"
;Round 2
Neo Cortex: "Let's try... this one!"
Neo Cortex: "Ugh, stop!"
;Round 3
Neo Cortex: "Alright, have it your way!"
Neo Cortex: "The Anti-Marsupial Missile is my own design. Do you like it?"
Neo Cortex: "Punch that bandicoot, Punchbot!"
Neo Cortex: "Eugh!"
Neo Cortex: "Nyah! Well if you won't play fair then neither will I!"
Neo Cortex: "Whoops, did I do that?"
Neo Cortex: (singing) "Kill the bandicoot, crush the bandicoot, smash in its head!"
;Round 4
Neo Cortex: "Hmm... I wonder what happens if I hit all the buttons at once?"
Neo Cortex: "Feel the wrath of Cortex!"
;If Crash/Coco is killed
Neo Cortex: "Muahahahaha!"
====Cortex Defeated (C)====
[The command centre begins to shake and spark.]
Neo Cortex: "Not again!"
[The command centre explodes, sending Cortex flying to the ground below. He shakily picks himself up to his knees, only to slam his fists into the ground below in pure, agonized frustration.]
Neo Cortex: "Blasted bandicoots!"
[Cortex whimpers and begins shuffling towards Crash on his knees.]
Neo Cortex: "Must we keep going around and around like this?"
[Cortex grabs Crash and lightly shakes him.]
Neo Cortex: "Tell me, Crash, is this all there is, forever?"
[Crash shrugs awkwardly. Cortex lets go and drops to the floor.]
Neo Cortex: "Ughhh..."
[Suddenly, a hologram of N. Tropy appears between Crash, Coco and Cortex, sending all three jumping backwards in shock.]
N. Tropy: "I knew you would be unable to handle this simplest of tasks."
Neo Cortex: "Gloat all you want, I quit. If you need me, I'll be on a tropical island somewhere. Alone."
[Cortex turns and storms off.]
N. Tropy: "How fortunate. You see, I no longer have need for our alliance. I've found a new partner... and a new plan."
[Cortex freezes and slowly turns around, outraged.]
Neo Cortex: "You were scheming behind my back?!"
N. Tropy: "Of course! The Rift Generator has capabilities beyond your meager imagination. You went content to simply rule over space and time, but I'd rather start from scratch. Erase it all. Wipe the slate clean. I'm going to reset the timeline and rebuild it to my liking. I will become a god. Which means YOU won't exist, and neither will those featherbrained masks, or those meddling marsupials! Hahahahahaha!"
[The hologram vanishes into its projector.]
Neo Cortex: "Wiped from existence by that pompous peacock?! I'd like to see him try after I shove that tuning fork up his—"
Coco: "BUT, not if we get him first."
[Coco and Crash grin and put their hands on their hips confidently.]
Neo Cortex: "It appears we have a common enemy. Perhaps there's a way out of our endless cycle after all."
[Crash runs forward and scoops up Cortex into a tight hug, nuzzling his cheek. Coco sighs.]
Neo Cortex: "Huh? Okay... umm... hmmm... hm."
[Crash, Coco, and Cortex set off to avenge the betrayal.]
====Back to the past (M)====
[A quantum rift opens, revealing the next dimension. Cortex attempts to follow the bandicoot to the next dimension by sliding on the rail, only to slip and fall off.]
Neo Cortex: "Guagh!"
[Cortex falls down from the sky and face-plants into the ground in the Eggipus Dimension, grunting in pain.]
==Eggipus Dimension (88 Million B.C.B)==
===Fossil Fueled===
====Cortex's commentary (L)====
Neo Cortex: "Let's see how these prehistoric predators like my blaster's new settings."
Neo Cortex: "Hahaha! They laughed when I added blockification! Well, who's laughing now? Ahahaha! Me!"
Neo Cortex: "Ooh! Bouncy!"
Neo Cortex: "Ooh, I've never tried a volcano lair! Do good guys have volcano lairs? Hmm, much to learn."
Neo Cortex: "Gah! On second thought, no volcano lair! I can feel my nostril hairs sizzling!"
Neo Cortex: "Sheesh, haven't seen mushrooms that big since I left the gigantize-o-tron running overnight."
===Rock Blocked===
====Dingodile's commentary (L)====
Dingodile: "(sigh) Alright, gotta be another one of them shimmery things 'round here."
Dingodile: "Ahhh. Time to go home."
====T-Rex Encounter (C)====
[Dingodile spots another rift off in the distance and runs for it, only to find himself on the edge of a cliff. He looks around anxiously, then hears the roar of an approaching T-Rex. Using his Vacuum Cannon to launch himself forward, he makes a leap across a lava pool towards the rocky arch that the rift is hovering over. Meanwhile the T-Rex charges down the path in bandicoot pursuit. Dingodile cries out in fear as he sees the dinosaur approaching and drops down, landing on the side of the arch. He hastily scrabbles up the side of the rock formation and jumps into the rift just in time, causing the arch to collapse in the process.]
===Dino Dash===
====Ika-Ika (C)====
[Crash, Coco and Cortex walk up to Ika-Ika, who is sleeping inside half of a dinosaur egg shell. Lani-Loli darts towards his brother.]
Lani-Loli: "WAKE UP!"
[Ika-Ika screams as he jumps awake, accidentally flipping gravity in shock, flipping Crash, Coco and Cortex upside down onto the cave ceiling above.]
Ika-Ika: "Bwah? Goodness, if it isn't Lani-Loli! How are you, brother?"
[Lani-Loli smiles, but before he can respond, Coco steps forward.]
Coco: "Uhhh, sorry to interrupt, but existence could end in any minute so can we hurry?"
[Ika-Ika flips upside down, swapping to his downer personality. He sighs.]
Ika-Ika: "When's existence ever done anything for anyone, anyway?"
[Ika-Ika flips the gravity again, bringing them back down. He switches back to his main personality in the process.]
Ika-Ika: "Oh don't mind grumpy gus, he's always a downer."
[He briefly switches back to downer.]
Ika-Ika: "Yeah, don't mind me. I don't matter. Nothing matters."
Coco: "Now that we found Ika-Ika, that's all four! What's next?"
Lani-Loli: "We can't close the rifts until we stop whatever is opening them."
Neo Cortex: "That would be N. Tropy and his precious Rift Generator."
Coco: "Sounds like it's time to kick some N. Tropy butt!"
[Crash spins and strikes a determined pose.]
Crash: "Heh-hah!"
===Ika-Ika's assistance (M)===
Ika-Ika: "May I assist?"
[Back on the Dimensional Map, Ika-Ika opens up a new Quantum Rift, revealing the next dimension.]
==Bermugula's Orbit (???)==
===Out for Launch===
====Female N. Tropy (C)====
[Crash, Coco, and Neo Cortex fall from a rift into a space ship.]
Dingodile: "Crikey!"
[They land right on top of Dingodile, who was standing on the platform below.]
Coco: "Dingodile?!"
[Crash, Coco and Cortex clench their fists, ready to fight. Dingodile raises his hands disarmingly.]
Dingodile: "Easy, chums. If I was here to fight you'd be cactus."
[Tawna appears from behind Dingodile.]
Tawna: "He's with me. Found him lost out there. Caught up on the whole... time, space, y'know, thing."
Dingodile: "Yeah. Just tryin' to get home. I was enjoying the retired life, see."
Coco: "Got it. Our bad guy's had a change of heart too."
Cortex: "'Bad guy'...?"
[Cortex's hair droops miserably. The group looks around, confused, as familar voices ring out.]
N. Tropy: "Silence, whelp!"
Nitros Oxide: "But, sir!"
N. Tropy: "You try my patience, Oxide."
[Finally they notice a large monitor right by the platform they were standing on. On it, Oxide can be seen sitting at a control panel, with N. Tropy and N. Tropy (F) standing over him on either side.]
Oxide: "But—"
N. Tropy (F): "Now, now. I'm sure this insect knows how to obey an order."
[N. Tropy (F) roughly grabs Oxide's snout and tugs on it.]
Tawna and Cortex, simultaneously: "N. Tropy!"
[Tawna points at N. Tropy (F), while Cortex points at N. Tropy. The two look at each other in confusion.]
N. Tropy: (F): "Take your ship to Planet Bermugula and be on the lookout for ships approaching the Rift Generator. We can't afford any unwanted visitors."
[N. Tropy (F) finally lets go of Oxide's trunk.]
Oxide: "At once, your foulness!"
N. Tropy: "You manage our affairs with such poise."
N. Tropy (F): "Naturally. As do you."
[N. Tropy smirks at N. Tropy (F). N. Tropy (F) flirtatiously smiles back. Oxide looks back and forth between the two, looking uncomfortable and disgusted. N. Tropy growls softly and makes a claw motion at N. Tropy (F). She bites her lip and chuckles under her breath. Cut back to the main group's horrified reactions.]
Coco: "Blaurgh."
[Cortex shakes his head in disgust.]
Tawna: "Ugh. Barf."
[Dingodile nudges Crash and points at the monitor.]
Dingodile: "Ehehehehe!"
====Cortex intervenes (C)====
[N. Oxide's ship begins to take off, but is held in place by a tractor beam coming from within the space station.]
Neo Cortex: "Marvelous!"
Computer: "Tractor beam... enabled."
===Shipping Error===
====Cortex's commentary (L)====
Neo Cortex: "Got to find that ship! Ugh, if I only hadn't replaced my blaster's 'teleport' with that 'hairdry' function!"
====Speakerphone announcement (L)====
N. Oxide: "Ship launch in 10, 9... ugh, I should've started at 3. BLAST OFF!"
====Ship stopped (C)====
[Cortex hastily runs for the tractor beam's control panel. He looks up in panic as a small ship begins to take off.]
Neo Cortex: "Ahhh!"
[Cortex frantically searches for the ship's tractor beam controls and begins pressing random buttons. A recording of Oxide's voice begins to play from the computer.]
Oxide: "September 9th, entry seven. Dear Diary, that rash still hasn't gone away, and—"
[Cortex shakes his head and continues to press buttons until he finally finds the correct one.]
Computer: "Tractor beam... enabled."
[An electric beam shoots out and catches the ship in its pull, preventing it from leaving. Cortex wipes his forehead and sighs in relief.]
===Stowing Away===
====Tawna Flies Solo (C)====
[Crash and Coco stand in a room in the ship. Coco swipes though her tablet.]
Coco: "It looks like we're en route to the Rift Generator. But we'd be a lot faster in... that!"
[Coco points at the nearby Hovercraft. Just as the siblings go to approach the kart, a rope shoots out and ties them together. Tawna reveals herself as the culprit as she steps forward to tighten the knot.]
Coco: "What the — Tawna?!"
Tawna: "I'm not losing you guys in this dimension too. I'll handle this."
[Tawna jumps into the hovercraft and takes off through the airlock.]
Coco: "But... we're a team..."
[Tawna looks back briefly, but soon returns her focus to flying, a glare of determination on her face. Suddenly Cortex and Dingodile appear behind the bandicoot siblings.]
Dingodile: "Oi! What'd I miss...?"
====Speakerphone announcements (L)====
N. Oxide: "Stowaways?! Well — hey, where'd my kart go?!"
N. Oxide: "I swear I left my kart parked right there..."
N. Oxide: "My sixth kart stolen this year. (sob) My wife's gonna kill me."
N. Oxide: "Attention crew: asteroid field ahead, buckle your seatbelts!"
N. Oxide: "We're hit! Unbuckle those seatbelts and FIX MY SHIP!"
N. Oxide: "Quickly minions, prepare Master an escape pod!"
N. Oxide: "ABANDON SHIP!"
====Approaching Bermugula (M)====
[As Tawna's stolen ship approaches the N. Tropys' base, N. Tropy and N. Tropy (F) emerge from behind it. They float beside eachother, holding hands, as giant space turtles with chunks of land on their backs float in.]
===A Hole in Space===
====Intro cutscene (C)====
[At the rift generator, Tawna is knocked back by a blast of energy. Both N. Tropys smirk at her maliciously before N. Tropy (F) lashes out with her tuning fork, knocking Tawna to the ground. N. Tropy (F) picks up Tawna by catching her neck between the prongs of her tuning fork, looking her in the face as she struggles to get out.]
N. Tropy (F): "What's the matter, hero? Couldn't solo this one?"
Coco: "Let her go!"
[Suddenly, Coco, Crash, Cortex and Dingodile emerge from a quantum rift, ready to fight. N. Tropy (F) turns to N. Tropy.]
N. Tropy (F): "The last time I killed her friends, her screams were exquisite."
[Crash and Coco gasp in horror.]
N. Tropy: "Delicious!"
Tawna: "No!"
N. Tropy: "Let's make this fun. Give them a sporting chance!"
N. Tropy (F): "Ooh!"
[N. Tropy (F) throws Tawna to the ground, landing at Crash and Coco's feet. The siblings quickly rush forward to check if she's okay.]
N. Tropy (F): "Let's see what you mongrels can do as a pack!"
[The whole group looks up in fear. The N. Tropys slam their tuning forks into the ground in unison, making a massive burst of energy that sends Crash and Coco unconscious on a floating piece of stone by a quantum rift in space. Akano emerges from the rift and looks at them.]
Akano: "AWAKE."
[The bandicoots awaken and get up, groaning.]
Akano: "FOLLOW."
[Akano turns and goes back into the rift. The siblings turn to follow Akano through the rift.]
====Rail (L)====
Coco: "...a door between dimensions..."
Aku Aku: "...reality-shattering proportions..."
Coco: "...interdimensional domination..."
Lani-Loli: "...something monumentally stupid!..."
N. Gin: "...RAWK-IT HED!..."
Coco: "...not from our universe!..."
Tawna: "...I fly solo..."
Akano: "...ban-di-coot..."
Kupuna-Wa: "...I mean everything..."
Neo Cortex: "...is this all there is, forever?..."
N. Tropy: "...a new partner..."
Neo Cortex: "...scheming behind my back?!..."
Neo Cortex: "...a way out of our endless cycle..."
Dingodile: "...tryin' to get home..."
Lani-Loli: "...we can't close the rifts until we stop whatever's opening them..."
N. Tropy (F): "...this insect..."
Coco: "...kick some N. Tropy butt!..."
N. Tropy: "...I will become a god!..."
====Battle quotes (L)====
;Lead-up
N. Tropy (F): "In my universe bandicoots are considered pests. As fit for extermination as a housefly."
N. Tropy: "Oh, how modern. Tell me more."
N. Tropy (F): "Some keep them as pets, but I find it disgusting. I much prefer spiders."
N. Tropy: "Mmm, yes. So elegant, spiders."
N. Tropy (F): "So many little legs to pull."
N. Tropy: "Ooh, wicked."
;Round 1
N. Tropy (F): "Oho, our lost puppy's found its way home."
N. Tropy: "Let's put them down."
N. Tropy: "Activate the security lasers!"
N. Tropy: "Enough! I won't be foiled by a fleabag!"
N. Tropy: "TIME to die!"
;Round 2
N. Tropy: "No!"
N. Tropy (F): "I'll squash this bug!"
;If Crash/Coco is killed
N. Tropy: "Ahahaha! Wretched cur."
N. Tropy: "Hmm, feels like we've done this before..."
N. Tropy: "Maybe the FIFTH time's a charm? Ahahaha!"
N. Tropy (F): "Hmmm, haven't you already tried this?"
*N. Tropy: "Yes!"
*N. Tropy: "Magnificent."
*N. Tropy: "There we are!"
*N. Tropy (F): "Awww, poor baby."
*N. Tropy (F): "Pathetic."
*N. Tropy (F): "Excellent."
====N. Tropys defeated (C)====
[Both N. Tropys are sent flying into the rift generator.]
N. Tropy: "Curse you..."
N. Tropy (F): "...bandicoots!"
[They slide down and collapse onto the floor. Crash stands and looks at the Tropys triumphantly before doing a dance.]
Coco: "We did it!"
Tawna: "Yeah, we did."
[Both Coco and Tawna high-five each other and laugh as Cortex approaches N. Tropy to gloat.]
Cortex: "What's the matter? Unable to handle even this simplest of tasks? I no longer have need for our—"
[Before Cortex can finish, Dingodile whack the N. Tropys with his tail, sending them flying.]
Dingodile: "Bloody dags."
Cortex: "...alliance."
[The Tropys fly over Kupuna-Wa into a rift.]
Kupuna-Wa: "Right then! Let's plug up these holes!"
[Lani-Loli, Akano and Ika-Ika nod before joining Kupuna-Wa around the rift generator.]
Lani-Loli: "Uh-huh! Heheh!"
[The Quantum Masks grunt in exertion as they concentrate their powers before beginning to rapidly spin around the Rift Generator, causing an explosion of bright golden light. The group look around in awe as beams of light shoot out. All around the multiverse, the rifts close up. Finally the masks stop spinning, and, exhausted, float back over to the main group.]
Dingodile: "Oi, not that it ain't been fun, but about my ticket home...?"
Kupuna-Wa: "Right! Now that we've mended things, we can take you anywhere, anywhen..."
[Cortex puts his hand on his chin and smirks in thought.]
Kupuna-Wa: "...after we rest. For now I can only get us as far as the culinary capital of the universe: Neon City!"
[The group all smile in appreciation. Crash licks his lips, flopping his tongue loosely out of his mouth. Lani-Loli opens a rift and motions to it eagerly. Tawna holds out her hand to Coco. Coco takes it as the group runs toward the rift, but quickly lets go to run faster.]
Akano: "Mmm... nachos."
====To Neon City! (M)====
[A quantum rift opens, revealing the next dimension. As the bandicoot proceeds to it, Tawna, Dingodile and Cortex follow behind them, scattering throughout the city.]
==The Sn@xx Dimension (3023)==
===Food Run===
====Neon City (C)====
[Crash, Coco and Aku Aku arrive on a platform in Neon City. They all look around at the city in amazement.]
Crash: "Woah!"
Coco: "You said it, Crash!"
Aku Aku: "We can meet with the others after we've explored. Now, which way are the food trucks?"
===Rush Hour===
====Dingodile's commentary (L)====
Dingodile: "Hmph. Let's see if these tall poppies know how to smoke a steak."
Dingodile: "Blimey! Best not to think about that."
Dingodile: "Hmm... does this mean I have franchise potential?"
Dingodile: "Am I a franchise? Could I open a restaurant... in an airport?"
Dingodile: "But if I franchise because I saw my future franchise... oh bollocks, my head hurts!"
====Tawna's commentary (L)====
Tawna: "Wonder what the local delicacy is here? I hope it's spicy. And fried."
Tawna: "Woohoooo!"
Tawna: "Yeah!"
Tawna: "Booyah!"
Tawna: "Oh yeah!"
Tawna: "Mmm... spicy fried mystery food."
===The Crate Escape===
====Betrayal (C)====
[Cortex approaches the rest of the group where they stand together by his airship.]
Tawna: "That Shnurgle shank was killer!"
Dingodile: "Ugh, strewth! Who cooked it?! Heat was too high. S'why it was all rubbery inside. Subpar grill marks, too."
[Cortex looks up at Kupuna-Wa and furrows his brow in thought.]
Coco: "I liked the pickled wumpa leaves."
Dingodile: "Ughhh..."
Cortex: "Cortex, you CAD! Why did you not see it before? Muahahaha!"
[Cortex pulls out his ray gun and zaps Kupuna-Wa with it, catching her in some kind of white ray.]
Kupuna-Wa: "AAAAAAGH!"
[Cortex laughs triumphantly and runs off into the airship, pulling Kupuna-Wa along with him. The rest of the group goes to give chase, but the ship begins to take off. Two pieces of cargo fall out of the back towards them, but Dingodile and Tawna kick them away. The two give a boost to Crash and Coco, sending them flying up after the airship.]
Tawna: "Give him hell!"
====Turning back time (C)====
[Cortex stands on the deck, still holding Kupuna-Wa captive. Crash and Coco run over to him.]
Cortex: "There's another way I can break this cycle of endless fighting between us. I can go back to where it started... I can undo my greatest failure!"
[Crash raises an eyebrow, not understanding.]
Coco: "He means you, Crash."
[Crash puts a hand on his chest and gasps, hurt.]
Kupuna-Wa: "Nyaugh!"
[Cortex laughs maniacally and raises his hand as he harnesses Kupuna-Wa's power to open a massive rift, big enough for the entire airship.]
Neo Cortex: "Bye-bye, bandicoots!"
[A massive gust of wind sends Crash and Coco flying backwards through the airship, leaving the bandicoots dangling out of the docking bay at the back. The ship proceeds through the rift, into the past.]
===Bandicoot Paradox (M)===
[Cortex's airship flies through the rift towards the newly revealed Cortex Castle.]
Neo Cortex: And now for me to stop... ME!
[Kupuna-Wa and the bandicoot fall out of the airship, landing at the base of the castle.]
Kupuna-Wa: "Aaaah!"
==Cortex Island (1996)==
===Nitro Processing===
====Past Cortex (C)====
[Crash and Coco fall out of a rift, landing in the toxic sewers of Cortex Castle. Crash pulls on his ears in joy, before doing the Crash Dance. Coco rolls her eyes and smiles as she claps for him. A green hologram of Cortex appears behind them.]
Cortex: "You again?! You two are so clingy! Take a hint already!"
[Suddenly a different, yellow hologram of Cortex appears.]
Cortex (Past): "Who's on my super secret personal frequency?!"
[Past Cortex turns and sees his future self's hologram.]
Cortex (Past): "What?! Who is this... this imposter?!"
Cortex: "Do you not recognize your own face? I've come from the future to warn you! If you try to turn Crash Bandicoot into the general of your army you will fail!"
[Crash looks back and forth between the two Cortexes, going cross-eyed in confusion.]
Cortex: "The machine rejects hi—"
Cortex (Past): "Fraud! Fiend! N. Brio, alert the guards!"
[Past Cortex's hologram turns off.]
Cortex: "Ugh... why won't I listen to me?!"
[Cortex's hologram too vanishes. Crash looks at Coco and shrugs.]
====Arguments (L)====
Neo Cortex (Past): "Listen up, lackeys! There's an impostor-me on the loose."
Neo Cortex (Past): "Identical in appearance: beady eyes, lips like two overripe bananas, skin like a jaundiced mole rat... a bona fide ten."
Neo Cortex (Past): "Guards, increase security! Protect your master!"
Neo Cortex: "Is that what I sound like? Do I have a weird voice?"
Neo Cortex: "Please, listen to me..."
Neo Cortex (Past): (mockingly) "Please, listen to me!"
Neo Cortex: "Agh! Rude!"
Neo Cortex (Past): "Ooo! Rude!"
Neo Cortex: "Gah! 'I'm a stubborn moron who's going to destroy his own future'!"
Neo Cortex (Past): "Ooh, I'm a stubborn mo— hey, wait a minute!"
===Toxic Tunnels===
====Arguments (L)====
Neo Cortex: "Ugh. Why did you — I — have to choose a bandicoot?"
Neo Cortex: "If I'd just stuck with the wombat, this all could've been different..."
Neo Cortex (Past): "Pah! Wombats! This bandicoot is strong, clever, and above all: loyal!"
Neo Cortex: Ughh...
Neo Cortex: "What must I do to prove myself?! Mother's name: Sharon. Childhood pet: rock with googly eyes. Favorite food: buttered noodles, butter on the side."
Neo Cortex (Past): "N. Brio! Change the password to my diary. This brute's been snooping."
===Cortex Castle===
====Arguments (L)====
Neo Cortex (Past): "You'll never find me, 'Neo Cortex'. This castle is a maze! I alone know all its secret halls and passages!"
Neo Cortex: "Like the one behind the portrait of grandfather that opens when you press on his triangular fossa?"
Neo Cortex (Past): "...But how?!"
Neo Cortex (Past): "I've had it up to HERE with your games, you lout!"
Neo Cortex: "Lout?! Why I never!"
N. Brio: "Wha? Wha-what is it...? Am I seeing double?"
Neo Cortex (Past): "N. Brio, quickly! Revoke this fraud's hologram access!"
N. Brio: "Uhhh, umm..."
Neo Cortex: "No, N. Brio! I'm no fraud! I'm from the future, you must listen to me!"
Neo Cortex (Past): "N. Brio, do you not recognize your own master?! I'm the real Cortex!"
Neo Cortex: "No N. Brio, I am!"
N. Brio: "Uhhh... DING DONG DING DONG! Oh my, sounds like the doorbell! I'd better go see who it is!"
Neo Cortex (Past): "Eugh! Help! Help!"
Neo Cortex: "Ack, quit struggling! Don't make me—"
Neo Cortex (Past): "Help! Anyone! We have an evil doppelgänger situation!"
Neo Cortex: "I'm not a doppelgänger! I'm — ugh, forget it!"
Neo Cortex (Past): "Hel — ugh!"
Neo Cortex: "There! That'll shut me up."
Neo Cortex: "Muahahahaha!"
===Seeing Double===
====Cortex's commentary (L)====
Neo Cortex: "I won't let me fail! I mean, fail differently! I mean — argh! Crash!"
Neo Cortex: "There must be a way for me to reason with me!"
Neo Cortex: "Why can't I be more reasonable, like I am?!"
====Cortex Confrontation (C)====
[Cortex rounds a corner, finally coming face-to-face with his past self, who is flanked by two Lab Assistants.]
Neo Cortex (Past): "Masquerade as me, will you?! Well—"
Neo Cortex: "I'm you from the future you idiot! I—"
Neo Cortex (Past): "I'm not an idiot! You're the idiot! Idiot! Get him!"
[The Lab Assistants follow Past Cortex's pointing finger and approach Present Cortex, crying out angrily and raising their hands to detain him. Cortex shoots both of them with his ray gun, sending one of them tumbling down a nearby trash chute. Past Cortex, unarmed, looks at his future self in fear. Present Cortex smirks confidently and aims his ray gun at his past self, who raises his hands and chuckles nervously.]
===The Past Unmasked===
====Intro cutscene (C)====
[Crash, Coco and Aku Aku finally enter a giant room in the depths of the castle. Cortex is seating in a giant command centre, with his past self suspended in a small cage by him, unconscious.]
Cortex: "Do you have any idea how stubborn I used to be?!"
Coco and Aku Aku: "Yes."
Crash: "Mm-hm."
[Cortex scoffs and glares down at the heroes. He points at his past self.]
Cortex: "I need to stop him from making you, but I can't kill him because that would kill me, so I guess that means I have to kill you."
[Cortex points down at Crash, who only gapes back at him. Cortex laughs maniacally as he slams his fist down onto a button.]
==== Battle quotes (L) ====
Phase 1:
Cortex: Yoink!
Cortex: Did you… jump on the Shoot-o-Matic?! Cheater!
Phase 2:
Cortex: Just relax and accept non-existence.
Cortex: Shoot-o-matics: shoot!
Phase 3:
Cortex: Time out, time out!
Cortex: AnnihiLaser, fire!
(1) Cortex: I can smell your fleas boiling.
(2) Cortex: What’s the matter? Afraid of the searing deadly laser?
Phase 4:
Cortex: Careful! I might flip!
Cortex: Yes… your whole world is upside down! Confused? Disoriented? I can see your tiny brain cells frying themselves! Ahahahahahahaha!
Phase 5:
Cortex: Can’t keep up the pace?
Cortex: Think fast!
Cortex: Sloooooooowing…
Cortex: Read, set…
Cortex: Cower before Cortex!
Phase 6:
Cortex: Rude!
Cortex: Enough! I’m bored of your shenanigans!
Cortex's complaints
Cortex: Stop that!
Cortex: Unbelievable!
Cortex: Blast it!
Cortex: Argh!
Calling for Lab Assistants
Cortex: Assistant, go!
Cortex: Assistant, help!
If Crash/Coco is killed
Cortex: Superb!
Cortex: Muahahaha!
Cortex: There we go!
====All's Well That Ends Well (C)====
[The command centre explodes, sending Cortex tumbling down to the ground below. He pounds the ground with his hands in frustration.]
Cortex: "Not like this!"
[The command center careens down into the pit below. Its impact sends a small pile of crates on a nearby shelf falling down onto Cortex's head, one by one.]
Cortex: "Doh! Ugh! Oh! Ow! Huh! Augh!"
[Finally, Cortex collapses. Crash pulls a lever on a nearby control panel, freeing Past Cortex from his cage. Coco quickly hides behind the panel, pulling Crash behind it too. Past Cortex shakily climbs to his feet and stretches before noticing his present self unconscious on the floor.]
Cortex (Past): "Ughhh... oooh! Hmm, must've taken a hit to the old temporal lobe. But a fallen foe can only mean one thing... it came to blows and I WON! My new General's first order of business will be to dispose of you! Muahahaha!"
[Past Cortex cheerfully runs off to his lab, leaving Present Cortex alone on the ground. Crash and Coco emerge from behind the panel and notice a feed of the lab on a nearby monitor.]
Cortex (Past): "We are closer than ever before! Quickly! Into the Vortex!"
N. Brio (Past): "But Doctor Cortex, the Vortex is not ready! We have no idea what it could do, ehehehehe!"
[Crash leans against a piece of machinery as he watches his past self being raised into the Cortex Vortex. He accidentally presses a button, causing some kind of power source to fall out of place and shatter on the ground, making the Cortex Vortex malfunction.]
Cortex (Past): "Failure again!"
Coco: "Explains a lot."
[Meanwhile, Present Cortex begins to stir.]
Cortex: "Nyuuuagh..."
[Akano drops down onto Cortex's back, holding him down.]
Akano: "You. Stay."
Cortex: "Ugh... what are you going to do to me?!"
Kupuna-Wa: "Nuh-uh-uh! Looks like somebody needs a little time out..."
Lani-Loli: "...somewhere he can't cause any trouble!"
Ika-Ika: "Enjoy the end of the universe!"
[The masks conjure a Quantum Rift, which quickly sucks Cortex in.]
Cortex: "Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!"
[Crash then dances in celebration, ending by grinning at the camera.]
[The camera cuts to a brand new Dingo's Diner commercial. Dingodile walks into frame in front of the diner.]
Dingodile: "Dingo's Diner is back and ready for you! Say g'day to delectable dishes inspired by my interdimensional travels! Enjoy the breeze with our innovative three-wall dining room design! Dingo's Diner: health and safety rated - 'D' for 'Delicious!'"
Narrator: "Warning: 'D' is a failing sanitation grade and does not stand for delicious."
[The screen turns off, and the scene changes to show Cortex alone at the end of the universe. He looks around at the endless dark wasteland surrounding him. He laughs once bitterly, before laying down on the ground, relaxed, hands behind his head.]
Cortex: "Ahhhhh... Peace at last."
[Back at N. Sanity Beach, Crash is napping on the couch while Coco and Tawna play a video game. Aku Aku and the Quantum Masks watch them play. N. Brio's egg is sitting by the couch.]
Tawna: "Ooh ooh! Almost there, almost there! Get the—"
Coco and Tawna in unison: "YES!"
Coco: "Wumpa victory!"
[Tawna and Coco high-five as the masks cheer them on.]
Coco: "Hey Crash, you're in!"
[Tawna throws her controller to Crash, which hits him in the head, making him jump awake. He grabs the controller and sits up, ready to play.]
Coco and Tawna: "5, 4, 3, 2, 1!"
Aku Aku: "Hahaha."
[Aku Aku looks out to the sea. All is at peace.]
==Flashback Tapes (L)==
===Subject #218===
;When tape begins
:Neo Cortex: "Experiment Log: Bandicoot Subject Trial Number One."
;When Crash reaches the end of the platform he is on
:Neo Cortex: "Oh! Y-yes... the crates are meant to be broken! They weren't placed as an impenetrable barrier! Hahahaha. I'll redesign the other tests."
;When Crash reaches the checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Huh? He's still alive? Interesting..."
;When tape is complete
:Neo Cortex: "First test complete! Well done, subject!"
===Navigational Awareness===
;When tape begins
:Neo Cortex: "The bandicoot bipedalization was a success. If he survives my trials of wit and strength, he'll be promoted to general of my army."
:Nitrus Brio: "You mean... you'll brainwash him, master?"
:Neo Cortex: "Tomato, potato."
;When encountering the first nitro crates
:Neo Cortex: "Nitro crate technology shows promise, but may require more R&D before rolling out."
:Neo Cortex: "That's where you come in."
===Wumpa Affinity Test===
;Shortly after tape begins
:Neo Cortex: "Subject continues to respond favorably to wumpa after rejecting all other foods."
;After checkpoint 
:Neo Cortex: "N. Brio! Bring me a wumpa fruit. The bandicoot's obsession with them has given me a hankering."
:Nitrus Brio: "But, uh, but master... your allergy!"
:Neo Cortex: "Oh it's fine. You can clean it!"
:Nitrus Brio: "Augh..."
===Bandicoot vs Wombat Eval===
;When encountering the first TNT crate
:Neo Cortex: "The TNT crate! A classic design. I got the idea from cartoons!"
;After checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Compared to the last subject, the increased thickness of the bandicoot's skull seems to be paying off."
;Later
:Neo Cortex: "Seriously, wombat skulls shatter like snowglobes."
===Outfit Durability Exam===
;When first crate is jumped on
:Neo Cortex: "It appears my old shorts fit the subject splendidly!"
;Shortly after checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Ahh, I miss those shorts. So breezy! Oodles of room in the, uh. Ahem. Nevermind."
===N. Brio Superior Study===
;When tape begins
:Nitrus Brio: "Ahem! Testing, testing! One-two-test! Hello, feeble subject! It is I, Dr. Nitrus Brio! Your future master! Muahahaha!"
;After checkpoint
:Nitrus Brio: "Oh, that's it... muhahaha! Yes, you will make a worthy ally!"
:Neo Cortex: "N. Brio?! Are you... running my experiment? Get out of here!"
:Nitrus Brio: (gasp) "Say nothing of our plan!"
===Diary Entry: 30th May, 1996===
;Shortly after tape begins
:Neo Cortex: "Dear diary: I seem to be developing a connection with the subject. A fatherly — uh, wait. Did I hit the wrong button?!"
;At checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Subject is to ignore my last message."
===Team Health Analysis===
;Shortly before encountering the first locked crates
:Neo Cortex: "Subject, do you think I'm too hard on N. Brio? I worry about him."
;Later
:Neo Cortex: "I know! I'll surprise N. Brio with a nice dinner!"
:Neo Cortex: "N. Brio! Prepare yourself a surprise dinner!"
===Subject #272_Final_B===
;Between tape beginning and checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Wee-ooh wee-ooh wee-ooh! Uh — uh-oh! It looks like that's the BIRTHDAY ALARM! Happy birthday, Subject!"
;At checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "I hope Subject likes wumpa cake! I withheld N. Brio's bathroom privileges until he got the recipe right."
:Nitrus Brio: "Master! Please!"
===Countdown Crate Intro===
;When tape begins
:Nitrus Brio: "Foolish Cortex doesn't know we're plotting against him right under his nose!"
;Later, before checkpoint
:Nitrus Brio: "Insubordination feels so... hehe... dangerous! But we must be careful, my friend!"
;Later, after checkpoint
:Nitrus Brio: "Please! I just don't want to scrape bandicoot guts off the floor anymore."
;When tape is complete
:Nitrus Brio: "Hm-hm!"
===Cortex Vortex Pre-Check===
;When tape begins
:Neo Cortex: Experiment Log: "Bandicoot Subject Final Trial."
;Later
:"Oh, it seems like only yesterday Subject was nibbling wumpa scraps out of my hand!"
;At checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "I got you a little graduation present, Subject. A name: Crashworth Cortex the First! Um, 'Crash' for short."
;When tape is complete
:Neo Cortex: "Excellent work, Crash! It's time for your promotion!"
===Perameles Coco===
;When tape begins
:Neo Cortex: "Begin experiment log: new subject, code name 'Coco'".
;Before checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "If that rapscallion brother of yours hadn't escaped, you wouldn't be all alone. Crash is the real villain here."
;After checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Ahhhh, Crash..."
===N. Gin N.Terview===
;Shortly after tape begins
:Neo Cortex: "Tell me about your qualifications."
:N. Gin: "Well, I have a degree in devious devices—"
:Neo Cortex: "Wait a sec. N. Brio! You left the mic on!"
;At checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "So, was that rocket in your head an experiment gone wrong, or...?"
:N. Gin: "What rocket?"
:Neo Cortex: "Oh... nevermind."
===Nitro Bounce Crate Test===
;When first nitro bounce crate is depleted
:Neo Cortex: "Careful! This crate has a secret surprise. Ehehehehehe."
;Shortly after checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Hmm... the subject's hair has impressive volume and shine. And that bounce!"
:Neo Cortex: "N. Brio! I wish to try whatever pet shampoo our furry friend uses. My follicles are simply decaying."
===N. Gin's N.Genious N.Bouncers===
;When tape begins
:N. Gin: "Greetings, cat! I'll be running today's experiment!"
:Neo Cortex: "For the last time, it's not a cat! It's a bandicoot!"
:N. Gin: "Bandicoot? Hmph. Doesn't look like a bandicoot."
;Later, after checkpoint
:N. Gin: "Yes... nice bowl of milk waiting for when Subject completes the test."
:Neo Cortex: "Ughhh."
===Mammal Manipulation===
;When tape begins
:N. Gin: "I must say the mechanics of mammals are most mysterious."
;Later
:N. Gin: "I mean, why all that blood? Fossil fuels are MUCH more efficient. You should replace yours, like I did."
===Replacement Considerations===
;After first obstacle
:Neo Cortex: "This is the last bandicoot. If this doesn't work out, I'll have to change animals."
;After fourth obstacle
:Neo Cortex: "Let's see, we have... crocodiles, dingoes... Ugh! If only I didn't have to choose!"
===Overall Fitness Exam===
;Before checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "It took a while to find Coco an appropriate outfit, but I must say I outdid myself."
;After checkpoint
:Nitrus Brio: "Are those MY overalls? Mother made me those!"
===Tech Check===
;When tape begins
:N. Gin: "'Coco' appears to possess a fascination with technology. Or just a video game addiction."
;At checkpoint
:N. Gin: "Still, perhaps I can mentor her in the ways of mechanics and computing..."
===Resilience Evaluation===
;Shortly after tape begins
:Neo Cortex: "Subject appears—"
:Nitrus Brio: "Master, uh, Dr. N. Tropy is calling."
:Neo Cortex: "Ugh. Tell him I'm in the shower again!"
;Shortly after checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "'I'm N. Tropy! I think animal experiments are stupid!' Pah! Time travel. Big deal!"
===The Gauntlet===
;When tape begins
:Neo Cortex: "Strange... I don't remember THIS test chamber..."
;Before checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Wait! This is the room with the super secret emergency escape hatch!"
;After checkpoint
:Neo Cortex: "Maybe next time I'll try a hedgehog... or a bobcat... or a gecko."
;When tape is complete
:Neo Cortex: "Well, there goes another one. We should really get that escape hatch sealed."
===Context-dependent quotes===
====Neo Cortex, when tape begins====
*"I hope I didn't make this one too hard."
*"World domination is a slow and laborious process."
*"Whenever you're ready."
*"Experiment start."
*"Test: begin!"
*"You may start."
*"Here we go again!"
*"And... go!"
*"I put extra crates in this one."
*"Another day, another trial."
*"Let's see how this one goes."
*"Ready for another?"
====Neo Cortex, when tape is completed====
*"Test: success!"
*"Exceptional work!"
*"Experiment complete."
*"Good one!"
*"Well done!"
*"Outstanding!"
*"Another trial passed!"
*"You had help didn't you? Be honest!"
*"Marvelous!"
*"A resounding success!"
*"Very nice! A stellar performance!"
*"Keep it up!"
*"You made that look easy!"
*"Truly magnificent!"
*"Incredible!"
====N. Gin, when tape is completed====
*"Heha!"
*"Ahaha!"
====Neo Cortex, when Crash/Coco dies====
*"Oopsie poopums."
*"Rest now, sweet bandicoot."
*"N. Brio, the mop!"
*"My experiment!"
*"Oh. N. Brio, the revive-o-tron."
*"That's a dead one."
*"Ughhhh!"
*"Rats!"
*"Confound it all!"
*"Next time, perhaps."
*"Too bad."
*"Ugh. Experiment... failed."
*"Awww..."
*(Long sigh)
*(gasp)
====Nitrus Brio, when Crash dies====
*(yelp)
*"Uh, ah..."
*(laugh)
*"Heh, pathetic."
*"Oof... heh. Looks like that hurt, muahaha."
*"Hm."
*(gasp)
*"Huh?"
====N. Gin, when Coco dies====
*"Oops... I broke it."
*(laugh)
==Bonus Endings (C)==
===100% Epilogue===
Narrator: "N. Gin abandoned his heavy metal lifestyle for one of smooth jazz. His album "My Heart is a Doomsday Device" is currently number one in elevators all over the world. He'll be playing in the hotel bar from 3 to 3:30."
Narrator: "N. Brio was caught and caged after being mistaken for a flying squirrel. He is on display in the Art Of Taxidermy at Ripper Roo's Curious Cabinet of Curiosities."
Narrator: "To fuel his need for speed, Oxide became hooked on caffeine. He was hired as the spokesperson for a leading brand of energy drink. He is currently in rehab, and in the throes of a messy divorce."
Narrator: "Without their master, Cortex's lab assistants found themselves in need of a new gig. They renovated his blimp, turning it into a successful pop-up shop specializing in healing crystals."
Narrator: "Dingodile franchised his restaurant operation, with Dingo's Diner rising to become the first name in chain fast-casual dining. They closed overnight with officials citing "record health code violations". The original location remains open during its condemnation."
Narrator: "After successful expeditions to El Dorado, Shangri-La, Atlantis, and a brief fling with some dweeb named Shmathan Trake, Tawna is taking a brief hiatus from her adventures to re-center. She's recently taken up scrapbooking. She's not very good yet, but she's getting there."
Narrator: "After trying and failing to invent the world's first self-flying flying car, Coco found a new career as an e-sports champion. Don't forget to follow KickassCoco and SMASH that "adore" Button!"
Narrator: "The dimensions have heard nothing more of The Doctors Tropy since Crash foiled their plans... but evil geniuses are harder to squash than cockroaches."
[The narrator is revealed to be Crash, standing in a voiceover booth.]
Crash: "And as for me, heh. Well, let's just say I'm doing just fine."
===True Ending (106%)===
[Cortex is still relaxing, laying on his back on the dark sands of the wasteland.]
Cortex: "Ahh..."
[An ominous laugh rings out from the darkness. Cortex quickly sits up, startled.]
Cortex: "Huh? Uh..."
[Cortex stands up as the laughter grows louder. He looks around for the source of the sound in fear. The camera cuts to a dark void, with only the glow of Uka Uka's eyes illuminating the gloom as he continues to cackle. Finally his full face is illuminated as he bares his teeth, grinning at the camera maliciously.]
==Credits==
Narrator: "This game has been a work of fiction. Any similarities to any marsupials, talking masks, dingo/alligator hybrids or evil science guys with weirdly shaped heads, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
You should not have played this game if you suffer from: Wumpa allergy, Crash rash, fear of alternate dimensions, fear of moving platforms, fear of still platforms, fear of sequels, fear of squishy noises, fear of bouncy noises, fear of super-science, fear of collecting things, fear of 90s nostalgia, inability to comprehend time paradoxes, inability to forgive those who have wronged you, inability to pick a restaurant when someone asks you what you're hungry for, inability to remember where you parked, or a delicate tummy.
For more information on bandicoots and their diet, habitat, mating habits, birthday wishlists and shoe sizes, visit your local library or ask your grandma. I don't know if she has any prior experience with bandicoots, but she's very wise and I'm sure she'd love to hear from you. 
The makers of this game do not in any way endorse eating at Dingodile's diner, which has been known to cause transdimensional discharge, intestinal rifts, Wumpa whooping cough, parasitic slime boils, random teleportation into darker timelines and uncontrollable mewing like a little kitty cat during important business meetings. (gasp)
Any unauthorized exhibition, distribution or duplication of this game will result in very hurt feelings. And why would you want to hurt our feelings? We've always said really nice things about you. We even said your new haircut looked great even though it was kind of a weird length for you.
Guests of Crash Bandicoot stay at N. Sane beach suites, which is just a log with some moss on it. The moss is really soft, though, so you should be able to get a good night's sleep. What, are you too good to sleep on a log? Sorry, your majesty, I suppose you want a continental breakfast instead of a handful of ants that make their nest under the tree — geez louise, there's no pleasing some people! 
(gasp) Can you give me a minute? (gasp) Okay, I'm ready to go again. 
The events of this game are absolutely, 100% canonical, unless you didn't like them; in that case it was all a dream."
Category:Scripts
Category:Crash Bandicoot 4: It's About Time