124565-4-8-2015-0-to-50-tldr

== Content ==
			
Welcome to Zero to Fifty's TL;DR.  I'm Vic, and for the duration of this thread, I hate everything, everyone, and every movie that has ever featured Cameron Diaz.  And I mean that last one with a passion.
 
Fresh off of me pointing out his lack of charisma, Brett "I Have Traveled Back In Time To Avert the Wildstarpocalypse" Scheinert, better known as Timetravel, has taken time away from his day job on the F/V Cornelia Marie by the looks of things to tell us about a new raid.  Also, Timetravel looks at Tony as if he just talked about the way they're moving cocaine into his suburb to sell to his friends.  Not helping matters Tony looks like a gangsta fresh off the mean streets of Greenwich, Connecticut.  Either that, or he's about to rap a verse behind Taylor Swift.  Let's get started.
 
-Timetravel has materialized into this dimension to talk about the new boss-in-a-box raid from the PTR, Initialization Core Y-83.  Tony says Timetravel will post a Deep Dive article on it tomorrow.  Timetravel makes good on his name because it's up now.... and was magically written by Hildogen.  Such is the power of Timetravel; he is also a shapeshifter.
 
-Tony made a Draken on the PTR to hang out with Timetravel.  However, Timetravel has control of the camera, and instead shows off an augmented Rowsdower pet.  Tony says they will be pulling questions from the stream to ask Timetravel.  Obviously, Timetravel has done something to the stream... Zero to Fifty isn't a place where questions are asked and answered.  If I have to cover actual information again, this will make my thread look like an actual TL;DR.  That can't happen!  I have a reputation, here!
 
-ICY83 has a simple setup.  It's a hallway with a boss at the end.  It will have a four-part breadcrumb quest to lead you there, but no attunement.
 
-Timetravel uses his monstrous GM power to walk through killing everything.  Tony, who has no GM power, is killed almost instantly.  Even as a level 50, Tony's got no game.
 
-TT walks to the main core, where the three bosses (in this one fight) are standing.  There is a giant button in the middle.  Leaving it alone starts the fight on normal mode.  TT stops in the middle to use his magical powers to summon Tony's corpse into the room.  Tony panics because he thinks we can read the codes.  We can't, because his head is in the way.  Activating the button starts a harder mode.  The normal mode is tuned to Genetic Archives level, and drops GA-level loot.  Activating the harder mode is tuned to DS level and drops DS loot.  There will also be extra challenges that occur during the fight that may unlock more rewards.
 
-TT goes over some of the mechanics in basic.  I won't go over them here.  You can learn about them in the Deep Dive, or the fun way by wiping on them over and over.
 
-Someone asks if they are planning more boss-in-a-box encounter.  TT say not specifically, but they will act as filler between raid tiers.  If this is received very well, it will likely mean more are coming sooner.  Dasmoose asks if there will be achievements beyond realm firsts.  TT says that there will be.  TT is also looking forward to pets and the holo wardrobe.
 
-A wild DD appears, and as D appears before T in the alphabet, TT disappears.  In fact, he was never there.  Is there even an ICY83?  Is there a PTR?  IS THIS ENTIRE EXISTENCE A LIE?  DO I ACTUALLY LIKE CAMERON DIAZ?!
 
 
-.... No, no I don't.  Anyway, DD returns to the stream after a short musical interlude.  We will return after our own short musical interlude.
 
-Tony takes this opportunity to talk a big game.  Oh, now that TT isn't on the stream, you think you can talk smack, Tony?  Watch out behind you, TT can kill before you blink and can write your out of existence.  WE ALL EXIST AT HIS MERCY!  Tony also calls DD rude.  DD mentions the parable of the frog and the scorpion.  This seems to baffle Tony... and DD to some extent.  They explained it better in Boondock Saints 2.
 
-They bring up the torture chamber from last stream.  Apparently, Tony hasn't installed one yet in the community housing project.  One less reason to visit, I suppose.
 
-The 10 Day Free Trial is ongoing.  Anyone can try the game for free.  A lot of people seem to be.  We've had a lot of new arrivals lately.  Soon, we shall take them through instanced content, the crystal meth of Wildstar gaming.  They also took a giant company picture.  We don't have it yet, but we may someday when it comes back from the developer.  That seems like an antiquated concept.  Luckily, Timetravel has provided us with another snippet of the future.  Here is the Carbine Studios company photo
 
 
-Tony starts the community shout outs.  The first goes to Ankristen Everstar, who runs The Villa Dance Club.  You can see the video here.  You will either want to go see it or erase it from existence, depending on how much you like shirtless Aurin.  And bouncy Europop.  Tony asks for people to send in any community events people have planned so he can advertise them.
 
-The SCAR Corporation Fun Fair also happened last night.  It was on the plot of Potato Jane.  By all accounts, it was awesome.  Tony would go, but he's too much of a fan of shirtless Aurin and bouncy Europop to skip out on the Villa tonight.
 
-The group jumps into Nexus, and the ZTF gang meets.  Like all gangs in the California area, they are busy shooting everything with wild abandon because they don't have day jobs.  DD attempts to retell the story of the frog and scorpion, but fails.  She is told there is no more storytime allowed, which means you may all never know....
 
.... Okay, pause the TL;DR.
 
The story of the frog and the scorpion goes thus.  A scorpion is on one side of a river and needs to cross.  It asks a frog if it can ride on its back across.  The frog asks, "How will I know you won't sting me?"  The scorpion says, "Why would I?  If I did, we would both die.  I would drown."  The frog accepts this and starts taking the scorpion across the river.  Halfway across the scorpion stings the frog.  As it dies, the frog asks, "Why did you sting me if we'll both die?"  And the scorpion answers, "Because I am a scorpion; it is in my nature."
 
Probably best applied to all manner of people prone to bad decision making.  Sorry, I had to make sure that was told correctly.
 
Restart the TL;DR.... and apparently twerking for Tony....
 
-Tony has taken down his fort on his plot.  Apparently, he thought he could build it better.  We agree.  Good choice.
 
Parthenia says:  Wait, wasn't he supposed to be leveling?
 
-Tony saves Paul, then follows him to see him killed by the Murgh he had befriended.  In vengeance, Tony kills everything surrounding him, including uninvolved wasps.  That seems reasonable.  They then hold a wake for Paul, which ends in a massacre.  Awwwww, Tony's learning good behavior!  Sort of.  Hit V to vacuum up your loot, Tony.... hit V.... HIT V!  HIT V TO COLLECT YOUR LOOT!  YOU WON'T ALWAYS HAVE PEOPLE AROUND TO FEED YOU PLAT, YOU FREELOADER!
 
-Tony goes to Thayd, realizes he forgot to turn in a quest forever ago, and takes a minute to turn it in.  Then he rides back to Thayd.  DD relates a story about how her mother hid eggs around her house for Easter full of chocolate.  Apparently, this is a problem.  Come on, Sunshine, don't kill the fun!  You're supposed to be hopped up on candy for like a week after Easter because there's so much chocolate at your disposal.
 
-How long would it take you to walk up to the Blue Horizon Museum in Thayd?  Two minutes?  Three?  Tony decides to drive up the wreckage in Thayd to get to the ship, miss the platform for about ten minutes, and finally end up there to turn in an item.  They spend some time wandering around the Blue Horizon, and start jumping through everyone's costumes, especially Doom Kitty.  I'm going to go get a drink...
 
-Tony picks up a piece of loose parchment, kicking off a challenge.  DD tries to "help" by also attempting the challenge.  She immediately begins stealing parchment from Tony.  A competition kicks off with a race to gold.  Of course, DD wins.  She spends the next ten minutes taunting him through the item award process.
 
-We begin the fan art section.  Make sure you send your fan art of any kind or stripes to fanart@wildstar-online.com.  Peanut shows the most improbable picture of an Aurin ever, one of a battle scarred Aurin male holding a severed head.  Kitty MIGHT do something like that, but isn't a male.  The rest are chumps.  Zlide then is responsible for a great human Esper throwing blades in an action pose.  Evion then has sent in a pair of Aurin Espers looking very spunky for a pair of Aurin Espers.
 
-The stream has a minor cut to a windows desktop, then suddenly Tony believes the whole stream is cut out.  We get to watch his bored face for about a minute as he assumes the stream is coming back up.  It's relatively entertaining to finally see what Tony does off the stream... staring blankly at a screen.
 
-Again, Tony asks for your fanart.  Also, if Tony knows that you'll be streaming Wildstar, use other social channels to let the Carbine staff know so they can try to host the stream on their own Twitch channel.  Let them know so that they can increase your exposure.  And try not to suck, people are watching and the people in WoW will think you're some kind of wizard for being able to DPS while dodging circulating and following telegraphs.
 
That's it.  We're done.  I'm going to log into the game and get real.	
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Thanks for these, I really mean it. I want the information, but the video itself is so dreadfully boring to me :(. I want to like them, but I can't make it past the ten minute part and just end up skimming it for information.
 
But I'm not a fan of "let's play" videos either, so I'm not really the audience.	
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Thanks for these, I really mean it. I want the information, but the video itself is so dreadfully boring to me :(. I want to like them, but I can't make it past the ten minute part and just end up skimming it for information.
 
But I'm not a fan of "let's play" videos either, so I'm not really the audience.
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