Mee's Birthday

It's Mee's birthday, and he totally doesn't want a party, so Tahoma and Commander plan one for him. No, wait, now he wants one.
== Transcript ==
(Tahoma Fresh enters, humming, she is wearing a towel and holding her mic; she has apparently just gotten out of the shower.)
Commander: Hi Tahoma! Nice towel!
Tahoma: Uh.. hi, do I know you? (As she speaks, she leans toward a button on the wall labelled "RAPE ALERT")
Commander: It's me, the Commander, you know? Mee Marone's best friend? (The Commander holds up a picture of Mee with a moustache)
Tahoma: (Satisfied, she backs away from the button.) Oh, right, Commander. Of course. Why are you here?
Commander: Well, Mee's birthday's tomorrow, so I thought we could organize his birthday party. For some reason, nobody on Space Tree's ship wanted to help.
Tahoma: Really? Well, I asked him if he wanted a party last week, and he just said: "Birthday parties are for gays". No offense.
Commander: Well, clearly that was just a lie to cover his true feelings. Everybody wants a birthday party, especially those who specifically say they don't want one.
Tahoma: That's exactly what I thought! I mean, he seemed to like that party we had that one time.
Commander: You guys had a party? How come I wasn't invited?
Tahoma: Well, this was a different kind of party, where a group of midgets came over and (Tahoma turns her hair dryer on, obscuring her words for a moment. When she finishes her hair is in its usual shape) ... and that's why neither of us could walk for a week.
Commander: Oh, well anyway, I was thinking we should have the party in that big room on Space Tree's ship.
Tahoma: Of course! The place he'd least suspect. (as Tahoma says this, the Commander's pupils slowly move down )
(Screen Flip. We are now in the big room of Space Tree's ship. Tahoma has changed into her Channel J clothing.)
Commander: I think we can have a banner there that says "Happy Birthday Meelord" (As he says this, a banner appears in the corner reading "H-PPY B-DAY M-LORD"), or like, a clown in the corner there making balloon animals (Black Kid materializes with KLOWN on his shirt, holding a pink balloon animal) , over there we could have a pin the tail on the Allon --
Tahoma: (Tahoma had wandered off, she now enters holding posters that say "MEE'S BIRTHDAY TOMORROW!::BYOBBB" and a picture of Mee saying "I approve this message".) First things first. We need to put up these flyers all over the ship so people actually know about the party.
Commander: Really? I was just thinking we could announce it over the intercom thing.
Tahoma: Trust me Commander, you don't hold a microphone for 10 years without learning a little something about advertising.
Commander: Oh yeah, sorry. I forgot you had a microphone.
(Scene change, we see entering a doorway. One of Tahoma's posters hangs on the wall in the medical bay, next to Dr. Mee Marone's "Licensed" "Doctor" "real certificate".)
Mee: What the shit is this?
Mee: (Approaching Commander) Hey, I thought I told you, no birthday parties.
Commander: Yeah, I know what you said. "No birthday parties". (He makes air quotes with his second arm. His first arm is hanging a poster.) Wink~!
Mee: Yeah, I guess my reverse Pie-chology worked. (Turns and walks away) I'll see you tomorrow. This gay-ass party is going to be awesome.
Commander: Yep, it sure is. Wait a second... (A third, black hand supports Commander's chin)
(Scene Transition)
Commander: You see, now he's saying he LIKES the idea of a birthday party.
Tahoma: (Hanging aforementioned "H-PPY B-DAY" banner) Well, yeah, that's a good thing.
Commander: Well normally it would be, but clearly its just a lie to cover up his true feelings. Nobody really wants a birthday party. Especially those who specifically say they DO want one.
Tahoma: No, I think he actually wants a birthday party, Commander.
Commander: Look, Tahoma, Meelord and I are pretty close friends, y'know. A pretty personal connection. Way more personal than you. It's like... I can read him like a book. And I read lots of books. That's how I got the nick name, Bookworm-zander.
Tahoma: You have a personal connection with him, do you? (Commander nods) Sorry, but I believe I am the only one here who has swallowed -- (A hair dryer is heard again offscreen, obfuscating Tahoma's speech.) -- while wearing a blindfold!
Allon: (Allon is seen wearing a towel and holding a hair dryer.) Whoa, a blindfold! Sheez. I'll just go dry my hair in another room.
Commander: Well I'm not going to let you ruin Meelord's birthday wishes with some party that he doesn't even want. This is HIS special day, not yours.
Tahoma: (Sighs) If you don't want to be involved with the party anymore, that's fine. I can handle it myself. I have a microphone.
Commander: Fine then, you handle your precious party. And I'll handle myself! All night long.
(Scene transition. Space Tree's ship is shown from the outside briefly before going back to the big room on Space Tree's ship.)
Space Tree: Nice work setting up this party, Tahoma. Too bad about the turnout.
Tahoma: Where the hell is everybody? You'd almost think that nobody on this ship even cares about Meelord!
Space Tree: Well tha'ts not true, I mean... I ... kind of... tolerate him. And besides, more people are going to show up soon. The party's only been going for... 3 hours. Hey look, here's someone now!
Random McPerson: (Enters, then stops.) Oh wait, this isn't the space orgy. Ehh. (Backs out)
Space Tree: Uh, well anyway, its kind of weird the Commander hasn't shown up. Marone not coming to his own party I can understand, but I wonder where the Commander is. I wonder... (Camera begins zoom of Space Tree) I wonder if we can see that right now.
(Scene Transition. There is a new, unknown ship flying through space.)
Mee: God, are we going to get to this party soon or what? We've been traveling for like, 3 hours.
Commander: Right, because you really want to go to some gay-ass birthday party, right? Heh, yeah. I get it, wink.
Mee: Yeah, at first I thought it would kind of suck, especially since I don't even know when my actual birthday is, I just make up some random date whenever people ax about it, but it's been a few years since I had a birthday party, so maybe it'll be pretty cool, who knows?
Commander: Wait, so, you actually DO want a birthday party?
Mee: Well that's what I fuckin' said.
Commander: But before you said... Augh! Stop sending me these mixed signals!
(Scene Transition back to Space Tree's ship. Tahoma sits at a table beside a spoon of sugar looking dejected.)
Tahoma: Well, I guess he's not coming. Somehow, I knew he wouldn't...
Allon: Hey, he's here!
Tahoma: (Instantly happy again) Happy Birthday, Meelord! I knew you'd show up eventually!
Mee: Yeah hi so uh, where's the free birthday booze?
Reginald: Here ya go man. There's a whole table over there.
Mee: Thanks. Hey, looks like a pretty good turnout here.
Reginald: Well actually it was Allon here that convinced me and Pink frosting along with several other nameless characters to come here (Screen cuts away to Alien and Johnny) against our better judgement. So you should be thanking him.
Mee: Really? Thanks Elvin. I know I always call you a fat piece of shit, but after all this party stuff you've done for me, I guess you're actually a pretty cool piece of shit.
Reginald: Also, Pink Frosting and Space Tree are totally making out over there. So you should check that out too.
Mee: Heh, a crooked-mouthed tentacle chick making out with a tree? If this were a cartoon, that would be some pretty hilarious animation.
Tahoma: Well, it looks like everything turned out all-right.
Commander: Hey! I was just thinking that.
Random McPerson: Yeah, you wanna know what I was just thinkin'?
Commander: No.
Random McPerson: Are you SUUUUUURRRRRREEEEEE?
Commander: Yes.
Random McPerson: This party sucks anyway.
(End Credits)
== Easter Eggs ==
* At the end, right-click (with Windows) and select play to see part of a deleted scene with PF88.
* (Close up of a bug on the floor who walks toward PinkFrosting. The bug is stepped on by Tahoma.)
* Tahoma: Oh hi. PurpleFrosting, right?
* PinkFrosting: Whatever.
* Tahoma: So, are you looking forward to Meelord's party.
* PinkFrosting: Not really.
* Tahoma: Did you get him a present yet?
* PinkFrosting: Look, Tahoma --
* When the Commander is putting up the posters for Mee's Birthday party, when the Commander first turns his head, outside the frame reads: "that commander side view looks pretty bad someone should fix that"
== Fun Facts ==
* In between the time the Commander says "Fine then" and "all night long", outside of the border there is a spinning commander's head lip synching the actual commander's words.
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