Headhunters 2: The Ferocious Fifteen

== Introduction ==
Deep breath, everybody. We made it. Week five was the toughest week yet, as people made difficult decisions about multiple games that may or may not be played. It was all very weird and it seems like this may only get worse as the season goes on and the league has fewer options for schedule reorganization. But we did it. Five weeks down, four teams eliminated. And this week we say goodbye to last year's Cinderella (SAD!)....
== In Memoriam: Cam Shaft ==
It was a tough year for Cam Shaft. It all started on draft night when they had a party to attend which I will not pass judgment on even though we are in the middle of a pandemic and I have been holed up in my 400 square foot apartment for seven months with no end in sight. This amounted to them not getting a defense. Not because they forgot to take one, necessarily. But because they waited until around the 300th pick, at which point the other 18 teams had collectively drafted all 32 defenses. Of course, Leonard Fournette then got released right before the season started.
It seemed inevitable that Cam Shaft would be going home in the opening week of the season, but at the last minute they were able to pull off a trade with Clydesdales that sent him Denver's defense in exchange for Deebo Samuel. These two teams also traded with each other last season, only for Clydesdales to be eliminated week one.
But with no winning bids through five weeks, all this trade did was delay the inevitable.
Cam Shaft was the perfect storm of suck this week and still somehow was in contention late Monday night, when Jared Cook stuck him with a dagger touchdown that gave his trade partner Clydesdales a narrow edge.
Cam Shaft finished in the top five last season and is the first of the final five to go home. That makes three eliminations in a row where top ten teams have left us, which goes to show that anything can happen.
Cam Shaft:
== New Releases ==
#Tyreek Hill
#Aaron Rodgers
#CeeDee Lamb
#Mark Ingram
#Phillip lINDSAY
== Weeks Survived (2019 v 2020) ==
Weeks Survived (2019 v 2020)
Team 	2020 Finish	2019 Finish
Steve Blackman's Nun	19th 	N/A
Bad Boys 	18th 	9th (-9)
Bobecue Chicken 	17th 	7th (-10)
Cam Shaft 	16th 	5th (-11)
== Week Five Bidding Results ==
Week Five Bidding Results
Player 	Winning Team 	Winning Bid 	Next Highest Bid
D'Ernest Johnson 	The Guilloteam 	$70 	$50 (Last Coach Standing)
Justin Jackson 	LiveWithIt 	$70 	$50 (Last Coach Standing)
Frank Gore 	Last Coach Standing	$30 	None
Leonard Fournette	Henry VIII 	$11 (Waiver Priority)	$11 (A Team Has No Name)
Last Year's most expensive week five player: Julio Jones ($521)
== Money Spent Per Week ==
Money Spent Per Week
Week	Budget Spent 	Budget Spent (2019)
2 	$1173 (12 Players)	$1339 (7 Players)
3 	$1033 (7 Players) 	$1902 (15 Players)
4 	$1182 (11 Players)	$1614 (11 Players)
5 	$181 (4 Players) 	$1743 (14 Players)
It doesn't get much harder than it did in week five for bidding.  
==Week Five Results==
Week Five Results
Finish (Last Week)	Player 	Total Points
1(7) 	@FFDraftScott 	218.64
2(10) 	The Guilloteam 	198.26
3(12) 	It's Blitz! Track 2 	189.99
4(5) 	Out of Luck 	180.77
5(14) 	Ya Hate 2 See It 	180.56
6(8) 	Gore-ronavirus 	178.49
7(1) 	LiveWithIt 	178.35
8(9) 	A Team Has No Name 	176.67
9(2) 	Shotti's Bugatti 	154.99
10(15) 	Last Coach Standing 	149.59
11(16) 	Henry VIII 	147.53
12(4) 	Carole Pigskin 	145.95
13(3) 	Neck-Fix and Chill 	139.98
14(13) 	Hasta Laviska Baby 	117.30
15(6) 	Clydesdales 	111
16(11) 	Cam Shaft 	101.17
17 	Bobecue Chicken 	0
18 	Bad Boys 	0
19 	Steve Blackman's Nun	0
* Biggest Climber: Ya Hate 2 See It/It's Blitz! Track 2 (^9)
* Biggest Faller: Neck-Fix and Chill (v10)
== 2020 Draft Dodgers ==
Team Results Based on Draft Position 
Draft Pick	Team 	Week Eliminated
1 	Henry VIII 	ALIVE
2 	Bad Boys 	2
3 	@FFDraftScott 	ALIVE
4 	Ya Hate 2 See It 	ALIVE
5 	Out of Luck 	ALIVE
6 	Shotti's Bugatti 	ALIVE
7 	Clydesdales 	ALIVE
8 	Neck-Fix and Chill 	ALIVE
9 	Cam Shaft 	5
10 	LiveWithIt 	ALIVE
11 	Bobecue Chicken 	3
12 	It's Blitz! Track 2 	ALIVE
13 	Carole Pigskin 	ALIVE
14 	Last Coach Standing 	ALIVE
15 	Hasta Laviska Baby 	ALIVE
16 	Steve Blackman's Nun	1
17 	The Guilloteam 	ALIVE
18 	Gore-ronavirus 	ALIVE
19 	A Team Has no Name 	ALIVE
== Kings of the Castle ==
===1. @FFDraftScott===
A team that was eliminated by this point last season, Scott was the only team to break 200 in week 5 and he did it with two Bengals players combining for 4.40 points. AJ Green might be the biggest bust bid in HH history, but on the fliip side Myles Gaskin is doing alright for the 269th overall pick.
===2. The Guilloteam===
Got himself a little Fitzmagic this week, but we all know the real trick is benching him at the right time. Magic 101, a magician never reveals his tricks and a Fitzpatrick never breaks 45 fantasy points consistantly across an entire season. 
===3. It's Blitz! Track 2===
Ranked just 10th overall on the season, Blitz found himself as the beneficiary of two depleted backfields in week 5 with his two RBs Henderson and Devonta Freeman both breaking 20 points. That is huge for them as they get Julio Jones and Melvin Gordon back this week.
===4. Out of Luck===
It cannot be overstated how consistent and talented this team is and also how utterly autodrafted it is. 
===5. Ya Hate to See It===
The man is a wizard. Talk about magic. Someone tell me a team with Darnell Mooney, Cedrick Wilson, J.D. McKissic, and Eric Ebron did not just score 180 points in a PPR in America in the year 2020. 
== On the Chopping Block ==
=== 15. Clydesdales ===
The 14th ranked team somehow survives again, even with Joe Burrow's measely 11.37 points at QB and Kansas City's 6.00 points on defense. 4.73 from Deebo, 4.50 from Isaiah Ford, 3.70 from Pascal, 6 from McLaurin. Where did the points come from?
===14. Hasta Laviska Baby===
This team seems to have been on borrowed time with the way they've been hit by injuries and byes. But now Chris Godwin, Noah Fant, and Aaron Jones are sliding back into starting positions. The window to eliminate Hasta may have just closed.
===13. Neck-Fix and Chill===
There will be no chill in Neck-Fix's aggressive push for Aaron Rodgers this week with the loss of Dak Prescott, that I can assure you. The top-scoring team in the league just lost a player who had scored 25% of the team's total points. 
===14. Carole Pigskin===
Oh how the X chromosomes have fallen. Carole Pigskin didn't se her lineup this week, leaving in Sexy Rexy and Tim Patrick. Strategy? Perhaps. Carole better hope, since the Fantasy Gods do not like it when people forget their lineups. Also, can we talk about how much Zach Ertz fucking sucks? Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. 
== Average Scores of Eliminated Teams ==
Average Scores of Eliminated Teams
Team 	Average Score	Weeks Played
Bobecue Chicken 	153.32 	3
Cam Shaft 	142.66 	5
Bad Boys 	131.35 	2
Steve Blackman's Nun	96.56 	1
== Narrow Defeats ==
Margin of Defeat for Last Place Teams:
Margin of Defeat for Eliminated Teams
Team 	Margin of Defeat	Week Eliminated
Cam Shaft 	9.83 	5
Bad Boys 	10.17 	2
Bobecue Chicken 	17.24 	3
Steve Blackman's Nun	23.20 	1
== Rulers of the Kingdom ==
2020 first place finishers:
Top Scorers by Week
Week	Team 	Score
1 	Out of Luck 	212.79
2 	Hasta Laviska Baby	240.46
3 	The Guilloteam 	225.04
4 	LiveWithIt 	257.06
5 	@FFDraftScott 	217.04
== Dungeon Dwellers ==
2020 teams that finished second-to-last, narrowly avoiding elimination:
Low Scorers by Week
Week	Team 	Score
1 	The Guilloteam	119.86
2 	Carole Pigskin	135.28
3 	Henry VIII 	117.35
4 	Henry VIII (2)	75.10
5 	Clydesdales 	111.00
== Remaining Budget ==
Remaining Budget as of 10/6/20
Player 	Total Budget
Hasta Laviska Baby 	$1000
Neck-Fix and Chill 	$1000
Ya Hate to See It 	$1000
Clydesdales 	$1000
It's Blitz! Track 2 	$992
A Team Has No Name 	$972
Henry VIII 	$891
The Guilloteam 	$870
LiveWithit 	$799
Out of Luck 	$699
Last Coach Standing 	688
Gore-ronavirus 	$564
@FFDraftScott 	$539
Carole Pigskin 	$259
Shotti's Bugatti 	$150
Cam Shaft 	0
Bobecue Chicken 	0
Bad Boys 	0
Steve Blackman's Nun	0
See you all next week and happy bidding.