Good Friday Squared

==Exeter - 9th April 2004==
Danny was bored. So he decided to place a discrete advert in a London Newspaper, asking people to Join him. Two years or so down the line, I am walking down the back of Exeter High Street, terrified of what is to come, for I, Joinee Bishop, must round up my troops and instill happiness on the people of Exeter, and I have no less than 25 minutes to think of my opening line. 
25 minutes later.... 
"Do I look like a pillock to you Roz?" 
Hmmm.... not quite the words of an inspirational leader, or a trusted devotee, but the very words of one Joinee Bishop, standing in Exeter, with an A3 piece of cardboard with the words "Join Me: It's Lovely". 
Having never organised a Join Meet, and indeed having never attended a Join Meet before, I was rather worried about Good Friday Squared. I needent have been worried though. Joinees were lining the streets, stretching for, if not miles then yards, and if not yards then feet, but numbers are not important, for we were triumphant in making people happy. 
Myself and Joinees Tait, Daniels, Morgan, and potential Joinees de Sélincourt Jnr and a lovely girl named Emily were armed and dangerous with Easter Eggs. Big ones, small ones, and once with "My Little Pony" written on the side. But we soon noticed a trend... people were unhappy to accept free Easter Eggs from a group of teenagers. Especially ones with strange signs inviting anyone to "Join" them. 
Our first failure was the Express & Echo salesman. Claiming he avoided chocolate, and refusing to put up a poster due to "company policy", we wished him a happy Easter, and bade him farewell. Perhaps, later tonight, he'll sit back in his armchair with his pipe, reminiscing, and (for the first time in a long while) crack open a smile at the bizarreness of the situation. Or perhaps not. 
Undettered, we ventured onto the Big Issue salesman. Perhaps in response to our purchase of two magazines, he gallantly accepted a Creme Egg. Success! We were on our way. 
So as the day progressed, we gradually learned who and who not to approach. Joinee Daniels tried to convince this group of people to take his My Little Pony egg. After a tense few seconds, in which he was very nearly triumphant, he 
returned in failure. Undetered, he returned to them once more to try again with a Buttons egg, being as it is, slightly less girly. Once again he failed, and he dared not return with a Creme Egg. 
 
We decided our position in front of Virgin was not such a prime location for getting people to accept our gifts, so we headed off down the High Street. Suddenly we came across 'The Fudge Man'. Joinee Daniels being a regular customer of his, he almost accepted our offer of the My Little Pony egg. He did, however, accept the Buttons egg, and provided this prime location for my brilliantly rubbish 'The Karma Army Needs You!' poster. 
The people on the High Street all seemed to be busily preoccupied with their tasks of the day, so we ventured off
toward Rougemont Gardens in search of park basking in the glorious weather God had bestowed upon Good Friday Squared. Here we met three lovely ladies watching their children in the trees. They wisely accepted our offer of Creme Eggs, and we wished them a happy Easter. Further along the path I saw a prime target. There was a man, sitting on the floor, and my goodness he looked happy. What a grin that man had. Rather stupidly I approached the man and started my spiel with the words "You look happy... would you like a Creme Egg?". 
It is phrases like this that people really should avoid. My God I sounded stupid. Thankfully, the bloke upstairs must have realised I had good intentions, and made the man Dutch. So with any luck, he didnt understand me anyway. 
Either that or he pretended to be foreign to make me feel slightly less stupid at saying to a stranger "You look happy". 
Also in Rougemont, we gave an egg to a boy who looked genuinely bemused, yet still came back to us 5 minutes later with a friend. We also let Joinees Tait and Morgan approach two rather scary looking people, whilst the rest of 
us kept our distance. In the trees. Where they couldnt see us. 
 
On our walk back toward the High Street, we passed the three ladies again, who had, in the space of 10 minutes, gone from reluctant to demanding. Sadly, no more Creme Eggs were to be had. 
We then traversed to WHSmith, in search of a copy of the book Join Me, to insert our message of good will into its pristine pages. 
Back in the High Street, we sought prime poster locations and potential targets for making happy. After deciding not to place posters between the displays of Athena, we placed one in a phone booth, and stared in amazement as Joinee Daniels chased down a bus to the traffic lights and placed our message on its back. Right now, either cars all over Exbridges are wondering what the Karma Army is, or running over Danny's face with complete ignorance. 
[Click here to see an image of Steve The Scientologist]
This is Steve. The scientologist. After further searching for poster locations, and failing to find the book in Waterstones, we met Steve. The Scientologist. 
Look at his lovely face. He was chuffed with his Easter Egg. He proceeded to tell us all about his cause, and how they help with all sorts of issues, "religiously" rather than religiously. Kinda. Sort of. I won't recall his wisdom, or rather, can't, but I can say that it involved Chickemakas, a made up species of Monkey, and any conversations involving Monkeys have my full attention. 
Steve seemed genuinely enthusiastic about Join Me as we explained, and left him the website address, so hopefully he will become an honorary Joinee soon. 
 
Bidding the still smiling Steve farewell, we played our part in making Pip a full time Joinee, and then proceeded to the Boston Tea Party to finish up. We can now succesfully announce that Joinee Morgan is now a devotee to the Boston Tea Party, and has a weakness for white hot chocolate, and I can also confirm that the staff are very gushy when somebody gives them a massive Easter Egg to share. Methinks I could demand free drinks from now on. My God they loved me!
Ahem! Back to reality...
So there we go, a success!
Category:Join Meet