S07E03: The Gang’s Relationship Status is Complicated Already

== Flashback Scene ==
We’re sitting in the Drakeguard, and just found out our job is to deal with He Who Sleeps, who lives in Limbo, which means we’re all vaguely aware we may have to go there someday. As a result, Nissa has been disappearing into the library for long hours at a time, trying to do as much research as possible.
She shows up all excited for lunch one day, telling the group “you all have to follow me right now”.
We grab our food to go and show up in a meeting room where there’s a projector set up already. Nissa plays for us a Planar Travel Video, voiced by Troy Maclure from the Simpsons (link to full contents).
We effectively learn:
* There’s no day/night cycle
* The only light is from sudden, unreliable bursts of fire and lightning that morph into existent
* Don’t try to cook in limbo
* The Gith Zorai appeared here thousands of years ago, focused on training and bettering themselves; their whole goal is to train themselves and improve, and their iron will creates a pocket of stability around them
* Limbo is the Slaad’s native plain of existence; in contrast, they exude a tight aura of stabilization around them and can travel the plane without concern
* Only way to survive is to travel as a group, since you can fight the chaos with concentration, but eventually you have to sleep or rest
Nissa: The More You Know!!!!She was using her minor illusion cantrip to enhance the presentation. Kanye wanted to help but Averlyth told him to pay attention.
The main takeaway the group gets from this video is that limbo is scary as shit.Nissa: So eventually, we’ll be heading into limbo.DM: I mean that’s where He Who Sleeps is, if you can figure out some way to beat him without going to limbo, more power to you.Kanye: Oh that’s a great idea, we can summon things from other planes right?Averlyth: You mean summon He Who Sleeps? Kanye, we don’t want that.Momma P and He Who Sleeps are more like the Elder Gods of dragons; they see the world in a different way than we do because they just operate on a different time scale.
=== Previously on MCVFD ===
We went to Bumblefuck to investigate something that might’ve been cultists-related. We found a town full of bodies and Slaads.
We adopted a nuke them from orbit strategy since that’s the only way to be sure. There was a moment where it seemed like all was lost because reinforcement Green Slaads showed up, but then Gith Zorai showed up and an elderly one named Dak’kon introduced himself to us.
=== Session ===
Nissa is trying to evaluate Dak’kon’s approximate social ranking so she knows how deeply to curtsy. DM: How did you roll?Nissa: Ummm he’s from limbo, that’s all I know…..Sorith: Self-DMing, I love it.We do notice they’re all wearing simple clothes, loose garments that allow for a lot of movement. They’re not quite what we’d call a uniform, more like a practical reality, though they do all tend to favor simple colors. The Drakeguard symbol is on all of them, usually a patch or symbol over the chest.
Dak’kon at a glance is notably older than the olders, though we aren’t clear about their lifespans. The others look like they’re in their 30’s, Dak’kon might be early 60’s (totally guessing). He’s equally fit as the others, all the others defer to him, and he was clearly competent in the fight. It’s not like there’s an obvious hierarchy, like he’s a ranking officer, or if they just respect him highly. He seems clearly like the head of the group. There’s nothing about his clothes that gives any information about his social standing compared to Nissa; not particularly fine, but not shabby.
While the grown ups are talking, Sorith is slowly wandering towards the group, confidently checking out their gear without saying a word. The Gith Zorai don’t make a big deal out of it, and they let him observe them. One of them tucks their cloak back so he can get a better glance. As a fellow monk, he does recognize their style overall.
Nissa wants to gently dismount from Kanye’s harness and walk up to Dak’kon to shake his hand. Kanye wants to address Dak’kon in a way that implies he was aware that he was coming, like thanking him for taking care of the Slaadi, and then greet him and get a situation report for him. There’s a brief moment for one of them to stop the other, since they know each other so well.
Kanye ends up deciding to hold back for a moment, to give the impression that Nissa is taking the lead, but really she’s acting like a security detail.DM: Kanye, give me an insight check.Kanye: Insight, that’s a thing I know.Kanye feels confident that any humans or humanoids from this world whose context he understands would properly pick up the vibe he’s putting down that he’s subtly making a power play implying that he’s in charge and they should report to you. He feels great about his performance, and yet he gets absolutely nothing from Dak’kon. He can’t tell if he noticed, if he cares, the dude is a blank wall. He possibly, maybe sense a bit of amusement from Dak’kon’s crew, but it’s a subtle thing.
Nissa gets to Dak’kon and shakes his hand.Nissa: Know that I am Nissa, know that we are Drakeguard, know that I am very sorry for whatever the dude behind me is doing with his eyes right now.Nissa registers a very faint trace of surprise when they hear we’re Drakeguard, but it’s more like an “oh interesting” not an “oh my god”. He tells us it’s a pleasure (he’s unfailingly polite) and they have not had contact with anyone for some time.
Nissa tells him about the MCVFD and our recent goals, and then invites him to our flying island. Dak’kon thinks about it for a bit. He turns and makes eye contact with another Gith Zorai who gives him nothing (like a junior that knows better than to respond), and then he turns back to her.Dak’kon: Your assistance would not be unwelcome. I admit to some hesitation with accepting help from your group, but I believe the phrase is beggars can’t be choosers. We know the ones you refer to as the Horsemen. We know they have been temporarily dealt with. But we face a larger challenge. Are you familiar with He Who Sleeps?Nissa tells him yes, and that we are familiar with him, and we’re responsible for dealing with him. Dak’kon cautiously asks who told us about He Who Sleeps, and Nissa similarly hesitates to name the Director.
He notices this reaction, then says that we may find that we are neither opposed nor aligned. He speaks with other Gith Zorai in their native language before turning to us and asking if we worked for “She Who Wakes”? At our blank reaction, he lists a few more names that we don’t recognize.Nissa: She has not introduced herself as She Who WakesKanye: We have an open relationship with her!There’s a facepalm or two, but Kanye’s interjection might’ve actually helped with the situation.
Kanye for some reason introduces himself and offers a coaster; Dak’kon accepts it to be polite and it disappears into a robe. He clearly has no idea what it is.
Kanye tells Dak’kon we are affiliated with the Drakeguard and have worked with them to resolve crises. He asks them if they need help because the Four Horsemen were always showing up in our plane. Dak’kon reminds Kanye that they’re from our plane and hints that we might be the ones not doing our job.
Kanye asks if we can work together to make both of our jobs easier, since neither of us look like we enjoy going to the other plane. Dak’kon pauses to think about it, then he asks if we will consent to a psionic mind meld. Kanye claims he has people that do that stuff, like Nissa. Dak’kon asks if Nissa would consent to a psionic mind meld, and she agrees.
He asks her to put her fingers on his temple as he reaches out to touch her temple. Just for show, Sorith is also putting his fingers up to his own temple.
Nissa feels another mind brush against hers. This other mind is moving cautiously to avoid breaking any boundaries or proceeding further than she is willing to allow it. It skims her most recent memories, looking to see what she knows of the Drakeguard.
As this happens, she has a thought about her hesitation to trust him, and then suddenly she feels like his mind is open to her as well. Dak’kon allows her to skim his surface memories. After a moment, they break contact.
Nissa has gained a bit of information from this, even though she wasn’t trained in mind melds. She saw that Dak’kon and his group really are from a group called the Drakeguard. They are stationed in limbo, and were connected to our Drakeguard until something unknown split the groups apart.
Most of all, what she got was a sense of deep concern about whether or not he can trust us given our association with Grandmomma P.Nissa: Did he see the morality arc in my brain??When he steps back, he looks at us one at a time, regarding us kindly. Then he gestures back at the rest of the Dak’kon and we see them all visibly relax. We hadn’t realized they were ready to draw weapons earlier.Dak’kon: I see that you know your Drakeguard and I see that you know your purpose. I see that you all have good intentions. I do not believe you are in the thrall of She Who Wakes. Because of this, though it goes against my nature to trust anyone from this branch of the Drakeguard, I will trust your group.Dak’kon: I will not consent to returning to your Drakeguard, nor will I allow anyone who does not consent to a mind probe to come to ours. Know that there is history between our groups that you should learn, if you are willing to come to Limbo. If you are unwilling, I understand, but you should know the offer stands.Nissa tells him about Qualish and asks if we should get the limbo-specific gear Qualish was making us before we leave. Dak’kon confirms if the gear we’re thinking of is a mechanical structure for keeping us safe, then claims we will not need such devices while we travel with the Gith Zorai group, and while we’re in the city. If we leave the monastery or safe zones, we would need that gear, but they can open a portal back to our plane at any time.
Nissa tells Kanye to give him a decoder ring. Kanye has a couple of guest passes for short term authentication tokens.
The group takes a moment to remind Kanye that the rings only work for authentication, not message encryption.Nissa: Yeah it’s more like a promise ring?Dak’kon accepts the ring with an air of diplomatic gratitude, stating that he knows the significance of the gift.
The group has named the Gith Zorai city “Woolmaster”.
The group has named the Limbo Drakeguard Director “Wosley”.
The group briefly considers if we have any back-up plans if anything goes wrong in Limbo. Kanye thought for some reason we had a way to teleport to various places via Qualish’s baubles.Kanye: Wait no, it was real! We went to Starbucks! I remembered the coffee.Averlyth casts Greater Restoration on Kanye so he’s no longer suffering from Chaos Phage. Kanye now won’t turn into a Slaad, but he still looks like he’s in pretty bad shape. His suit is super stoked about all the blood but would NEVER take it without his consent.
Sorith is the only one that hasn’t taken much damage, so the group is deciding to rest up before going on our next adventure. Conveniently, we burned every single corpse that had a risk of Slaad babies, so we are deciding to take a long rest in the newly emptied houses of Bumblefuck. The next morning, we can go through the portal, where they should have guards stationed to escort us.
Dak’kon is ready to depart to the city of Woolmaster to report to Wosley. He asks if we have any final questions, and states that he hopes to see us soon. Kanye has one question: he asks if Dak’kon is interested in Dragon Chess. Dak’kon enjoys the activity but declines the invitation for tonight given his responsibility for bringing his team back to Woolmaster safely. He would be happy to play Kanye in Limbo.
Also, Dak’kon keeps calling Kanye “Can-Yeh”, so Kanye keeps calling Dak’kon “Daikon”.
They give us a polite bow and then retreat through the portal. We’re standing in the still slightly smoking rubble of Bumblefuck.
Kanye unceremoniously fires off the glitter cannons and it is everywhere.
The group makes themselves comfortable, resting up under our own stars for the night.
Averlyth keeps catching Kanye looking at her chariot longingly. He wants to bedazzle it, he has so many ideas, and now he’s trying to claim bedazzling is a blacksmithing skill? She reminds him that it’s no longer shaped like a coffin, it no longer has the bedazzling he did on the coffin awhile back, BUT as a compromise, she’ll let him have a trophy shelf on the back side, and he can put anything he wants on the shelf.DM: What I’m hearing is you’re letting Kanye put a tramp stamp on your chariot.Kanye: It’s more like a bumper sticker!The next morning, Kanye has rested up and yet somehow also decided exactly what he’s putting on the trophy shelf.
Kanye has decided to put the gold teeth from the Tomb of Horrors into the mouth of the Skeletal Medusa Head. He has also decided (without anyone else’s input) to cut the extremely valuable oversized rubies into smaller gems that can fit into the eye sockets. The glammed up skull is to be placed in the display case with owl bear claws to the right and left of it, as if the Medusa head was high fiving you.Averlyth: You know, that was very aesthetically appropriate!Kanye: Yeah! Praise Bane. I read the brochure, I know what’s up.It’s now totally canon that glitter doesn’t stick to true believers of Bane, which is why Averlyth doesn’t believe Kanye is a true believer yet - he still has glitter all over him. Averlyth is now totally driving the chariot backwards to make sure the new decor is the first thing Dak’kon’s team sees.
Nissa leaves a voicemail for Grandmomma P that we’re in Limbo in case the call won’t go through while we’re in a different plane.
Kanye asks if we should take the sim cards out of our bracers? Nissa and Averlyth simultaneously respond that Dak’kon would’ve told us if that were a risk. Averlyth tells Nissa she’s allowed to sit in the chariot. Kanye still asks about burner bracers.
We proceed through the portal and find ourselves in what can best be described as a small clearing. But instead of a normal clearing in a forest, it’s more like a small area of stable ground in the middle of a raging chaos.
When we first arrive, it’s utterly overwhelming. Nothing could’ve prepared us for the madness before us. There are constantly shifting noises, smells, radiating heat, then freezing cold, gusts of wind, then stagnant air. The air smells of dead corpses, then lollipops; we’re getting mental whiplash through all of our senses.
It takes a few minutes to orient ourselves and tune out the insanity in our peripheral vision. Keeping our eyes down to the ground, we notice the portal we just came through looks different from this end. The portal in the fireplace we walked through was orderly; on this side, it looks as if it was ripped into existence through an act of violence.
There are a number of Dak’kon’s soldiers standing guard in the clearing, greeting us politely as we get our bearings. One of them left the moment when we showed up, down a tunnel-like trail heading towards a distant, but visible city.
At a glance, the city in the distance looks like a very standard city: Mediterranean style, white-walled buildings, terrace tiers rising up towards a central structure. There are what look like fortifications around the outsides, and an obvious protective dome that extends over the perimeter of the city, a little way out from the walls.
Beyond that, it’s pure madness.
It’s not just that there’s torrents of fire and ice, it’s that things pop in and out of existence without rest or warning. In one moment, we see a whale, in another we see fire sprites. There are things swimming around out there that hurt our eyes to look at; they appear to be native denizens of limbo, but it’s hard to tell if they’re flora or fauna, or to know what could even evolve in this environment.
It is almost an assault on our very being to be here. We begin to realize a very small hint of the amount of willpower that it must take to enforce stability in an environment like this. It is absolutely wild that anything can exist here.
Our understanding of Dak’kon’s soldiers is that each and every one of them are capable of enforcing a Slaad-like stability field on themselves. But for a city of this size to appear stable, there must be many citizens whose only job is to focus on managing the stability field in Woolmaster. It is absolutely m to think about the amount of work and effort that goes into making a livable and habitable area in this chaos.
Thankfully, no one expects anything of us while we’re taking in the sights of Limbo for the first time. It seems like the Gith Zorai have seen this type of reaction before. They don’t seem sympathetic, but they do seem understanding that this is something that happens to other people.
After a while, the single guard who left returns with Dak’kon in tow.Dak’kon: Welcome, my friends, to Limbo.Sorith: S’upDak’kon is pleased we took his invitation, and Nissa tells him we are curious about the Drakeguard secrets he alluded to. He responds that he is not the one we need to speak to, but he will take us to the one who is. Wosley can answer all our questions about the Drakeguard, and then we can ask Dak’kon more questions after, if we’d like.
Kanye is suddenly nervous about whether or not we’re about to meet someone that might mind control us or something. The group reminds him we’re very much in a dangerous environment already, we have very little control over our safety right now and it is what it is.
Dak’kon leads us towards the city. Every once in a while, Kanye clinks his wolvely berserker claws to test the stability of the tunnel and the concentration skills of the accompanying Gith Zorai by proxy.
As we enter Woolmaster, we are struck by the apparent normalcy of the city - there are food stalls, markets, children running around, schools, courtyards where groups of people are practicing something that looks halfway between Tai Chi and Martial Arts.
Dak’kon takes us upwards towards the large structure in the middle, which appears to be half tower, half palace, half castle. It’s equal parts fortification and display, and it has a view of the surrounding area. It has a commanding presence.
Eventually he takes us to the entrance of the structure to go inside. Averlyth parks her chariot outside the building, with Woodhouse.
We are expecting to be led to something like a throne room; to our surprise, we’re led into something more like a cube farm?????
There are hundreds of Gith Zorai working on this floor. There are tables, people writing things, breakout rooms where people are having meetings. With Dak’kon at the lead, we navigate through the building to a single, inconspicuous office in the back. It is not especially larger than the other offices we passed.
Sitting behind the desk in an unremarkable chair is an unremarkable looking Gith Zorai. He looks younger than Dak’kon and is not dressed in the same monastic robes - he’s in the Gith equivalent of a blazer and a button up with no tie. He looks up and sees us coming and gestures at us to come on in.
We accept the invitation, seating ourselves in somewhat comfortable chairs facing the desk. Kanye flourishes a coaster and puts it on the desk, telling Wosley it’s his coaster now. Wosley nods graciously.
Dak’kon gestured to the man behind the desk, introducing us to Wosley, the Director of this branch of the Drakeguard. Dak’kon tells us he will be waiting outside the building until we are done. Wosley chuckles as he leaves, commenting that Dak’kon is wound a little tight.
Wosley cheerfully asks us how he can help!
Nissa explains how we met Dak’kon, and how we’re just starting to learn there’s more to the Drakeguard than we realized. She very smoothly name drops how we’re the highest ranking officers on our plane, and then goes on to say that we know there are secrets we don’t know and we’d love to be more informed.Wosley: What do you know about the splintering of the Drakeguard?Nissa: 8 hours and 10 minutes ago, we found out it happened :DAfter seeming to figure out where to start, Wosley begins his explanation by affirming that we know that we’re working for an Elder Dragon. We do, so he asks if we know how He Who Sleeps came to Limbo. We don’t, so he gives us the short version: HWS was aiming to dominate the entire material plane, which is where we’re from. Wosley hesitates to ascribe motives to dragons, but says it’s not a stretch to attribute HWS’s goals with evil: he wanted to cause chaos, then gain power in the aftermath to influence whatever changes he wanted.
Thousands of years ago, She Who Wakes fought an astounding war with the greatest army that had ever been assembled: wizards, warriors, mages of all backgrounds, a generation’s best and finest, all united against HWS. In the end, they were not able to kill him. They were able to force him out of the material plane into Limbo. At that time, she cast a spell on him to keep him asleep.
Wosley reminds us that the information he’s sharing now is old enough to have hazy details, the effects of folklore and time. It is unclear to us now if she was unable to kill him, if she didn’t want to kill him, if she hoped Limbo would do it for her, etc. What we do know is that the army she fought with came to be known as the Drakeguard. They were aligned with SWW because they were aligned in purpose, and their goal was to prevent HWS from taking over.
For this end, a Drakeguard branch was created in Limbo to keep a closer eye on the status of He Who Sleeps. This branch used to have other races, but now is only Gith Zorai, given the difficulties of the plane of Limbo. For a long time, this branch was solely responsible for ensuring that HWS did not come to take over the Plane of Existence.
Many hundreds of years ago, the Gith Zorai learned that She Who Sleeps had been appointed Director by the Drakeguard of the Material Plane. The reason that Dak’kon reacted poorly about us being from this branch was because this decision was a violation to them - there was supposed to be a separation of concerns. The Drakeguard was supposed to keep an eye on Elder Dragons, and having the Director be staffed by an Elder Dragon herself entirely compromises the position. The organization may have worked with her in the past, but there are no checks and balances if she herself is the one in charge.
Dak’kon had apparently said something funny about it, something along the lines of “How did this happen? How did they become a police state under the leadership of an Elder Dragon? It’s in the name, Drake Guard, you’re supposed to watch the dragons.”
The result of this was a complete separation of contact between the branches. The perspective of this side is that the branch on the material plane cannot be trusted, and for a long time that was totally fine.
But, Wosley sighs, the branches have been out of touch, and now he’s surprised to see how much further the organizations have drifted. He’s surprised to find out we didn’t know they existed, and he’s surprised that we operate more like some sort of enforcement crew?
The Drakeguard in Limbo has, by necessity, evolved to be more of a monastic order. It’s a huge part of life for the Gith Zorai. Every citizen must do their part to ensure stability, to make sure the city does not fall. There are hundreds of dreamers, stabilizers (many words for the role) - people whose entire job is to literally focus on keeping the city stable.
Wosley sees we’re still unsure and asks how old we think Dak’kon is. Sorith and Kanye both immediately guess in the three hundred range for some reason, the rest of us don’t give a straight answer.
Wosley answers indirectly: they learned that the more people focus on a thing, the more stable it is. Outside of Woolmaster, if you let go of something, it will likely just disappear. The flip side of that is you can also just create things out of the air. 
For instance, they don’t have an armory - they all create the weapons out of the air. They release them when they come home, and they just disappear. That’s not true of everything, however. There are Holy Relics, which are objects with so many people that believe in them that they continue to exist. Named items in Limbo are incredibly powerful. Dak’kon’s sword is the Sword of Zirthonon, a phenomenally old relic that exists solely through the continued belief of Gith Zorai.
Dak’kon himself is well over a thousand years old, just by the virtue of people telling his story. He was one of the followers of Zirthonon in the older days, and he has had his share of dramatic exploits over his life. The very nature of reality here demands a more monastic approach to life.
When the Drakeguard branch in limbo started, they were a martial group with the goal of keeping HWS from acting. They have evolved into a monastic, meditative order since then, with a lot of the efforts just around keeping HWS in place.
The reason Dak’kon brought the MCVFD to Woolmaster, despite his distrust, is because the Gith Zorai is losing.
He Who Sleeps is waking.
HWS is a phenomenally powerful psychic. He talks to people in their dreams, he threatens, he conjoles, he warns. He is returning.
Dak’kon had told Wosley how the MCVFD defeated the Four Horsemen; that’s fantastic but won’t be enough alone. He Who Sleeps is still going to wake at this rate, and he will appear in the Material Plane unless there is help.
Wosley tells us that Dak’kon said he trusted Nissa, and that the Gith Zorai need our help. They are in constant attack from the Slaad, who are independent but influenced by He Who Sleeps. They have also lost stabilizing artifacts that previously kept HWS in check.
Nissa makes a Dak’kon face and says “KNOW that we would protect our plane..” and then bursts out laughing.
Kanye asks if the description of “losing” against HWS originates from the enemies getting stronger or the Gith Zorai getting weaker. Wosley answers that they’re both true, but also that the magic on HWS is getting weaker. Averlyth realizes this may be caused by the incident when Grandmomma P almost died.Kanye: I think… I think…… what do you think about that coaster? Are you going to get any mileage out of that?Kanye asks if the Drakeguard here need recruitment or something else. He says we’re good at killing things and that we can get more people to join the org so they’re growing. Wosley admits it’s a long war of attrition, so they’ve absolutely been losing people. Certainly not all Gith Zorai choose to join the struggle either, some depart.
Wosley also admits they would be extraordinarily hesitant to accept an influx of people from the Drakeguard from our plane, and that other races struggle in Limbo anyways. In terms of things we can do to help, he does have a growing list of tasks that Dak’kon and his team haven’t been able to get through.
They have had some outposts fall that held artifacts that helped keep HWS asleep; they were used as monitoring stations, and recovering them would be valuable. There are things we can do to reduce the number of Slaad attacking the city. There are other groups in limbo that they’ve lost contact with that we can help find. Trade relations are very important since not everyone can create everything, so a group that can create anything is very valuable.
Kanye asks if we’re treating the symptoms here - if the bottom line is that HWS is being contained by Momma P, what is the end game? Do we need her to bolster her strength, or replace her magic, or do something else?
Wosley says Kanye is incredibly insightful and clearly involved in tactics for our group: there are many ways to accomplish the goal of keeping HWS asleep, but none known that resolve the issue for good. Is there a way to bolster SWW? Is there a way to just kill HWS? Is there a way to just take him off the path he seems dead set on when he wakes?
The Gith Zorai Drakeguard have thought of these things, but haven’t yet seen a clear path, and Wosley welcomes our ideas.Wosley: It could be that an injection of fresh blood is exactly what we need.Kanye: Yeah if you could... not refer to injections of fresh blood.Kanye says we’re willing to help but he would need to confer with the group first. Wosley is understanding and directs us to the meeting room across the hall. The group jokes about what if the portable meeting room has been in Limbo this whole time.
Nissa asks how we feel about this mission given we already know about a destructive, grouchy god; Averlyth isn’t sure if she signed an NDA with Bane. The group thinks about how we’ve heard about 2 separate stories about the Drakeguard’s origin stories now.
Sorith questions why this Drakeguard branch was so unhappy about Momma P being the one in charge if they helped her to begin with. Kanye and the DM provide an explanation involving org charts, chain of commands, consultancies, and other workplace analogies.
Averlyth and Nissa give each other a knowing look, rummage around in a backpack, pull out Mizz Computer and ask:
“Mizz Computer, what can you tell us about the Drakeguard”?
Category:Episodes