Discomforts, Pains, and Irregularities

"Discomforts, Pains, and Irregularities" is the third episode in the podcast. It was released on 15 August 2014.
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== Synopsis ==
The time arrives for another one of Dr. Hilbert’s infamous biannual physical and wellness checks, causing Eiffel and Minkowski to descend into a state of panic. With life and limb on the line, they each find creative ways to delay the inevitable: Eiffel through one of his patented lie-filled schemes, Minkowski through a very unusual discovery in the station’s greenhouse. Plus, manual resets, meditations on the effects of sticks and stones, anesthetics, the limits of anesthetics, and spinal fluid samples.Official Wolf 359 website, "Season 1 — Wolf 359". Archived.
== Plot summary ==
Hera reminds everyone that it is time for the biannual physical examinations to be conducted by Dr. Hilbert. This is a prolonged and painful experience, and Eiffel is eager to avoid his, He invents an excuse of needing to manually reset the deep-space comms system, and Hilbert instead seeks out Minkowski.
Eiffel begins to argue with Hera, as she lied to him that morning about the availability of hot water in the showers. Hera responds that, since Eiffel refuses to shower without hot water and his body odor has become unpleasant, she was justified in "tactically misrepresenting available data." Eiffel finds a note from Minkowski, and calls her on the comms, and she informs him that she has discovered an unusual and overlarge sample in the greenhouse. Eiffel assumes this is an excuse to avoid Hilbert's physical, and reassures her that he supports her plan to keep watch over the sample and see if anything changes.
Minkowski reports that the plant sample seems to be able to detect her presence and is "playing dead" when she enters the room. Eiffel continues to assume she is lying. Hilbert arrives at the Comms Room to assist Eiffel with his diagnostics. Eiffel excuses himself to help Minkowski, who reports that the sample has grown huge and blocked her exit from the room. Eiffel realises that she is serious and goes to back her up, armed with a flamethrower. He discovers that Minkowski was telling the truth, and the plant monster attacks them before escaping into the vents. Due to this emergency, the physical examinations are officially suspended, to Eiffel's jubilation.
== External links ==
* Listen on Libsyn
* Recording script
== References ==
Category:Episodes
Category:Season 1