The Freddy Got Fingered Theory

== "The Freddy Got Fingered Theory" Written by DankLordX ==
Unless you've been living under a rock for the past 21 years, you might be familiar with an infamous movie named "Freddy Got Fingered" It's often considered to be one of the worst movies ever made, mostly because of the disturbing gross out humour and the poor acting. But some people say that the movie has actually gotten better with age, since dark humour is slowly rising in popularity. Here's a quick synopsis of the movie if you've never heard of it:
Gord Brody (Tom Green) is a struggling cartoonist trying to pitch an animated show to Hollywood executives. When he fails, he returns to his hometown with no choice but to live with his parents and younger brother, Freddy (Eddie Kaye Thomas). His father (Rip Torn) doesn't approve of Gord's career path, and pressures him to gain independence. As father and son exchange barbs, Gord comes up with a lie that changes everything: He claims his dad is "fingering" Freddy, leading to drastic consequences.
I typed "fingering" because the admins of this wiki might take this page down if i say...that other word. Anyway, let me tell you the truth about this movie. The truth that wasn't meant to be told. The truth that only Tom Green and I know about, and the truth is the reason why Tom Green isn't acting anymore. And that secret is "The Freddy Got Fingered Theory" Yeah, i promised not to tell anyone about this. But the truth must be told. Because Gord's behaviour doesn't seem normal for a 28 year old man, and his father has been driven to insanity. 
Insanity: Mental illness of such a severe nature that a person cannot distinguish fantasy from reality, cannot conduct her/his affairs due to psychosis, or is subject to uncontrollable impulsive behaviour
== The Theory ==
The reason as to why Gord acts like this is mostly because his parents didn't discipline him when he was a child. That's why he gets away with swinging an unborn baby still attached to the umbilical cord, or cutting open a dear carcass and wearing it. If you've seen the film, then you might know Gord gets a Lebaron (a fancy car) near the beginning of the movie. 
Well, His parents were actually gonna give the Lebaron to Freddy instead. Because they actually loved him more than they loved Gord, and Gord's mother never actually liked him in the first place. However, due to Gord threatening to kill his parents, he got the car instead. Nowadays, His dad constantly worries about him returning home and his mother worries about Freddy's health. As he was forced to spend most of his life in a nursing home, and he's probably still in the nursing home today. 
Other than the heinous acts shown in the movie, Gord has done some very awful things off-camera as well. A few years ago, he was caught gutting his uncle alive. Which resulted in him getting a life-time prison sentence without parole. During the court proceeding, Freddy was sitting in the back, laughing his ass off as the Judge announced that Gord would be getting a lifetime sentence in Prison. Something inside of Gord snapped! He grabbed the hammer, grabbed the Judge's shirt and threatened to bash her brains out. Because of this, his life in prison would only last about 4 or 5 years. 5 years later, Gord managed to escape prison without anyone seeing. And he immediately went back to his house, which was in Orlando. 
You could say that Gord was dreaming this whole time and never actually became an animator. He spent his whole life drawing cartoons in his Parents' basement. His cartoons got progressively more graphic, and his parents had to put an end to it. They threw the spare paper out of the window. Much to Gord's dismay, he wasn't able to draw his crude cartoons anymore. So he moved onto other things, such as bullying the Neighbour's Kid and physically abusing his father. The moment he turned 31, his parents kicked him out of their house because they didn't know how to cope with his behaviour.
After that, Gord was arrested for Domestic Violence and Child Abuse. And then on, he was finally living his new life in prison. His prison mates beat him and call him names. Gord just sits there, in his dim prison cell, waiting for the day he dies.
Category:Theory