She Used to Be My Girl/Quotes

:Homer: [grunting while strangling Bart]
:Marge: Homer! Lisa's gone missing!
:Homer: All right. Bart, I want to go to your room and think about what you've done.
:Bart: What have I done?
:Homer: Well... (pause) Why, you little-- [grunting while strangling Bart again] Just needed a reason to strangle you! I'll fix your wagon! [grunting]
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:[While Marge and Chloe are fighting]
:Homer: Ladies, there's no need to fight over me.
:Marge: No one's fighting over you!
:Homer: Oh... carry on.
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:Homer: The only reason we don't move out of this dung hill is because of my court-ordered ankle bracelet. (his ankle bracelet beeps) I'm here, quit bugging me!
:Marge: Why do you always have to show that to company?
:Homer: It's a conversation-starter.
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:Bart: Thinking is for losers!
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:Marge: Evergreen Terrace, the street that smells like pee.
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:Homer: Woo hoo! The circus!
:Lisa: The media circus.
:Homer: Woo hoo! I don't know the difference!
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:Kent Brockman: This just in: I'm pissed off!
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:Chloe: So, Marge, what's exciting in your life lately?
:Marge: Well, uh... Oh, we finally found out why the dog was scooting around on his butt all day. Turns out he had an impacted anal gland.
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:Homer: I am sofa king fat!
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:Bart: Mom, I want to be just like you. I mean the lava part, not saving Lisa.
:Homer: Pretend to care! (growling / strangles Bart)
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:Cookie Kwan: [to Mayor Quimby] Joe, why won't you acknowledge our love child?
:Mayor Quimby: Er, uh… that is not my baby.
:Baby: [sounds like Mayor Quimby] Er, uh, waaaah!
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:(While Homer and Marge at the women's conference)
:Marge: I don't see Lisa in any of the seminars.
:Homer: And I'm growing ashamed of my penis.
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:Kent Brockman: Channel 6 News rocks! A car chase every night, or the weather girl wears a tube top! And if she doesn't, you win a pizza!
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:Homer: What happened to us, Marge? We used to feed each other cheese and laugh all night. Then came the heart attacks.
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:Homer (to Marge about Chloe): Oh, honey, her life can't compare to yours. You got three kids, a TV tray from Expo '67, and you're married to King Stink.
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:Chloe: (knocking on trunk) Lisa, what are you doing in there?
:Lisa: Praying to Buddha, Jesus, Spongebob....there's no time to be picky!
:(In heaven, Buddha, Jesus, and Spongebob are looking down)
:Buddha: Perhaps we should help.
:Spongebob: Screw her! (does his crazy laugh)
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:(Bart is sawing through the TV)
:Marge: Bart, stop that!
:Bart: This isn't what it looks like.
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: Homer: Good news, Marge! I've learned to walk naked on stilts!
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:Chloe: Mr. Mayor, Will you answer one question?
:Mayor Quimby: Only if is submitted in writing. (Chloe gives him a paper and he eats it) Checkmate!
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:Lisa: There's lava under the ground.
:Chloe: Actually, lava underground is called magma.
:Lisa: You're so smart.
:Marge: Shut up!