Bar Slap

"Bar Slap" is a [SEASON NUMBER] thread written on [IRL DATE].
==Summary==
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==Full Text==
It was like two ships passing in the night. He got home from his shift, and Blunt ended up taking a walk. Stonegit couldn't blame him though. He understood the need for alone time to think.
But then the door to the tavern opened, and something that made him forget about the whole matter between himself, Akkey and Blunt. He lowered a book he had been closely examining and smoothly closed it as his eyes locked on the visitor.
"Good Hel...Vox?" He stood up as he placed a hand on the counter. "My god... where the hel have you been man?"
@scoutvox
voxarnason
The scout’s entrance into the tavern was met with an unexpected face; he hadn’t seen Stonegit in well over a decade, and remembered that his list of encounters among the original rebellion would only grow from this point. Vox made his way past the other patrons and met with the man at the counter.
“Stonegit... it’s really good to see you.” He reached out his hand and placed it on Stonegit’s back. “I’ve been... busy. Life is strange these days.”
moe-lazyeye
Stonegit’s hand automatically came up to grip his arm for a moment as he shifted back to make from for him at the counter. His face was still shocked. “Busy? Vox you were gone for ten years. No letters, no visits. Haddock died and I watched your kids grow up without you, what the hel happened?”  
voxarnason
Vox felt his heart sink into his stomach. It was such a common occurrence to be confronted on his departure and subsequent decade-long absence, and yet, it felt like a new wound each time it was brought up.
“Yeah... I definitely didn’t do myself any favors with that one. When I left, I knew it would be a fight if I told anyone... Tree and I were raising two kids, and it felt like our lives were finally falling into place, but Dario...” He looked down to the bar and let his gaze remain there. “My friend, Dario -- he hadn’t aged since he was brought back to us. I knew he needed answers, and I couldn’t bear the thought of letting him go alone to find them. I’d already allowed him to die once, and I wasn’t ready to be the one to let him die again.”
moe-lazyeye
Stonegit rested his arms on the bar and leaned forward attentively. “Yeah...?” He said invitingly, his eyes wide as he waited to hear what he thought would be the rest of the story.
voxarnason
“Yeah.” He continued to stare, forming his thoughts. “I knew that he wouldn’t stop until he knew what was causing it. He’s always been a stubborn stag... but like I said, it wasn’t anything I anticipated anyone in the Rebellion, let alone my family, understanding. I had to leave, and at the time, I thought that was the best way to do it.”
He waved over to the barkeep with a one-finger motion in hopes of procuring a drink. It would be necessary if this story were to progress.
“But the time we were gone was primarily spent traveling. Speaking to locals of various areas we encountered in hopes that somebody would know about Dario’s situation, or knew someone in a similar bind. We had absolutely no luck in that regard. It took everything in me not to just go back home after the second year went by, but I knew that it would destroy Dario. I couldn’t do that to him; not after letting him give up his own life for me before.”
The requested drink was delivered to Vox halfway through his rambling. He took a break to enjoy a brief swig before pressing on.
“Where was I?... ah. So we were exhausted. I could tell this was the only thing he wanted- the only thing he needed. I saw him break down on almost a nightly basis when we would set up camp with no more answers at the end of the day than when we started. One night, I decided to take a walk -- spending that length of time with one person consistently will push you to nearly hating one another. We fought relentlessly, and I know I said many, many things that I regret heavily now. I blamed him for keeping me away from my family. I blamed him for not seeing my kids grow up. I blamed him for the irreparable mental state I knew that Tree was in, raising two kids on her own and having no idea if I was even alive. I realize now that it was my own decision to take leave like that...”
He was getting side-tracked. It was his emotions getting the best of him... he hadn’t really talked about this with anyone in such detail.
“But I had to step away. It was killing me, in every sense of the word. We were so malnourished, exhausted, and just sad. I couldn’t help him how I wanted to, and I know he felt the guilt of bringing me along. I spent that night wandering and trying to make sense of the situation we were in, and then...”
He grabbed his drink once more, gulping it down with no intent on stopping before the last of the liquid entered his mouth. This was getting rough.
“...I came back... and Dario was gone. Just... gone. I would have not really thought much of it, but thing seemed in such disarray that there was no way he left willingly. That deer has always been so meticulous with everything. I lost it, Stonegit. I broke down in a way I’d never broken down before. I was convinced that I killed my best friend again.” He felt his eyes begin to sting. The emotions he felt then resonated deeply even now. “It was as if the wound on my chest ripped itself open once more. I’d failed the only person in my life I needed to protect in that moment. It took me months before I finally found him, and Stonegit...”
He put his face into his hand, shaking his head.
“...Stonegit, I never want to see someone I love the way he was ever again.”
moe-lazyeye
Two years...he didn’t send a single letter or double back for a visit for two years?
Stonegit wanted to shake Vox and loudly remind him that they were a rebellion with dragon and air travel everywhere, and that there was no excuse for such an absence. On top of that, Stonegit could not deny that Dario needed help to figure out what was going on with him, but if the stag wasn’t aging why the hel couldn’t the trip have happened after Liam and Kendra were grown? He felt pity for him and their hardships, but it paled in comparison to the turn in his chest when he had watched two, dear little kids grow up fatherless.
But the stayed quite. This can’t be it...this can’t be all of it... “Go on...” He said as he gripped his arm once, but there was a small shake in his fingers. 
voxarnason
TW // Fire, blood, violence, death
Vox motioned for a second drink. He was going to need some liquid courage to push through this story.
“When I finally found Dario, he’d been found by a hawk half-breed... Sylar... that had pledged his allegiance to High Central. He’d essentially betrayed his own kind to ensure his own protection under their regime. It was so selfish, and at the expense and safety of those he could kidnap and eventually turn over to High Central. They had him...”
The drink was promptly dropped in front of him. He couldn’t guzzle it quick enough.
“...sigh... they had him chained up. He was so ill and practically coasting on death’s doorstep, and I barely recognized him. I didn’t know what to do in that moment -- I froze, Stonegit. My best friend was dying in front of me and I couldn’t break past the fact that I was feeling bad about it. By the time I finally settled on trying to help, I heard footsteps... and I ran.”
His hands were trembling. Anger at himself, and at Sylar... it was overwhelming.
“I made camp again. I don’t think Dario was conscious when I found him, so I didn’t feel as though he thought I was abandoning him. At least, I guess that was my justification to myself for being a coward. I still can’t forgive myself for that moment. I don’t know if I could have taken on Sylar by myself, but I owed it to him to at least try. I managed to get back there the next day, and things seemed a lot less guarded than before. Once I snuck back into the basement, it only took one look from Dario to just send him into hysterics. He seemed so happy to see me, but my only concern was making sure nobody found us down there together. I did what I could to try and release the chains; gods, it felt like an eternity of using every tool I could find to just get them to open... but I just couldn’t make them budge. We had to have been working at it for at least an hour before I heard the footsteps again... but I couldn’t run this time. I knew that if I left Dario again, he wouldn’t make it. He was so frail at this point. I fought with everything I had to just get those cuffs off, and next thing I knew, I was thrown across that room with a rage I’d never encountered before.”
A third drink appeared in his hand. He hadn’t asked for this one, and wasn’t sure if Stonegit obtained it for him, or if the barkeep decided he needed another drink from this horrifically sad story.
“Sylar looked as if he had every intent to kill me. One second, I was scrambling on the floor to try and avoid him, and the next I felt my head being smashed against the ground. The strength of that bird was completely unexpected, and I knew that there wasn’t any hope in that moment of me getting away, let alone being able to bring Dario with me. I thought I was going to black out, and that would be it... until...”
Vox ingested the drink in one go. The shaking was substantially worse at this point.
“...everything was on fire. I couldn’t see, couldn’t breathe. I was convinced that something had blown up in such close proximity that there was no way Dario could still be alive. There was just so much smoke in the air, and I could hear a woman screaming. It was the most horrific thing I’d ever had to hear in my life. Next thing I knew, I felt arms reach around my torso and pull me to my feet. A hand grabbed mine, and pulled me to the exit with a force I wasn’t prepared for. Once I was able to take a breathe that wasn’t primarily smoke and ash, I was able to open my eyes again. I couldn’t believe that Dario was the one saving my ass with this one.”
He knocked his knuckles against the table a few times.
“Every time I’ve ever been on the brink of demise, Dario has been there. He was prepared to greet death himself, and was still able to pull me out of that. We managed to make it to a clearing and the two of us just collapsed. I was still coughing up blood and Dario was nearly lifeless. I threw him on my back and we trailed off as quickly as I could muster. The further we traveled away, the softer the screams became. We were convinced that Sylar was dead at that point, but during our travels, we heard musings about him that confirmed that he managed to survive. We would have returned sooner, but we were so afraid of him finding us and trying to hurt those we love, so we were forced to lay low for as long as we could muster. Gods, it took years for us to feel confident enough returning home. We knew each day gone by was another that was driving a wedge in our own relationship and that of myself with Tree, and Kendra... and Liam...” He softly spoke the last name, remembering his most recent encounter with his son. “I made many mistakes over the last decade. I don’t expect understanding, and I certainly don’t anticipate anyone’s forgiveness anytime soon.”
moe-lazyeye
Stonegit’s heart dropped into his stomach. They hide...for 5 years?!
His head swam. He could barely comprehend what he had just heard. Granted the trials Dario and Vox had gone through had been terrible, heartbreaking, but there was one problem. There was just...too...much...time. 
And suddenly Stonegit knew an awful truth. Just by the way Vox and talked about Dario, the expressions he had made while talking about Dario, as opposed to how he sounded and how he looked when talking about his own children and abandoned wife...he had seen and heard similar thing with himself before about Haddock...but not nearly similar enough. Vox had prioritized someone over his own family, to the fullest extent, to the point where very permanent, and very unnecessary damage had occurred. 
Stonegit knew that he had done what he had done at the lake for Haddock and no one else. But it was still a sacrifice. And now the suffering he endured that gave Vox a second chance at life felt like a lie, like a con. He had given up his sight that day. His tattered soul had caused suffering throughout the rebellion because of that day. And here Vox was...having tossed away the time that he had been given. 
Stonegit sat in wide eyed silence for a moment, and then with an anguished growl he grabbed Vox and hoisted him up to sit him on the bar. He yanked down on his shirt so he was looking him in the eye. His gaze was furious, but also pleading, as if something, anything, could have been misinterpreted from what he had just heard.  
“Don’t tell me this is true Vox, don’t tell me it’s true! Don’t tell me you were gone for two years without a single note or visit even though we live in a land filled with dragons. Don’t tell me that when Dario was missing you didn’t think to come back once to ask for help! You idiot! You would have helped you! We would have found Dario sooner, rescued him sooner! For fucks sake man! Do you know who I just had burst into my home? Who just recently tried to kill Blunt?!”
He gritted his teeth as tears weld in his eyes. “You have any idea what kind of man almost did unspeakable things to all of us, including your son and daughter?! You didn’t see me hiding in the woods for five years Vox! You didn’t see any of us do that! I watched your kids, helpless knowing that I or anyone else would never be able to be their father for you! Only to learn now that you could have visited at nearly any given time during your adventure? And that you haven’t just harmed the people here, but harmed yourself, and Dario by doing what you did?!”
Stonegit slowly let go of Vox’s shirt as he took a unsteady step away from him. “And you haven’t found out anything have you? Dario is still a mystery...” He clenched his fists. “I guess that decade doesn’t mean to a stag that doesn’t age but it sure meant a whole lot to Liam and Kendra. How the fuck did you not think to visit!? To write?! And how the fuck did the likes of Dario not have the common sense to point this out to you himself!?” 
voxarnason
The anger... the rage pointed directly at him was warranted. So many things Vox knew he had done wrong, and hearing them in an unabashed and unfiltered way was strikingly sobering. Every syllable dripping like justified poison from the man’s voice drove a proverbial stake deeper into his heart. He watched Stonegit move away from him with a look of disgust and disappointment that was unparalleled to what he’d experienced up to this point, and there was nothing he could argue against it.
“...and how the fuck did the likes of Dario not have the common sense to point this out to you himself?...”
The guilt and weight of the situation was suspended for just a moment -- the only thing Vox could feel now was a new fury. He dropped down from the bar and grabbed Stonegit by the shoulders, throwing him into the nearest wall and pinning him with as much strength as his arms would allow. With his own face mere inches from the man’s, Vox glared with overwhelming wrath.
“You... you do NOT blame Dario for this. You are so right, Stonegit. I absolutely fucked up. I will never be able to forgive myself for what I did, and you have every right to hate me as much as everyone else does for the decisions I made. Hel, I don’t believe any of you should ever feel the obligation to even so much as speak to me ever again. That is well deserved, but never think for a second that Dario was in any frame of mind to be my keeper.” He felt his breathing amplify the further he spoke, with voice unsteady and arms trembling. “I will never be able to take back what happened to him. I watched him lose himself for five years, Stonegit. I watched my best friend spiral into darkness and try so hard to forget the pain and trauma he’d been through. At no point during that last half decade was he in any frame of mind to make decisions for us. I alone destroyed any sense of worth, of safety, of happiness...”
He felt his eyes well up in that moment. He’d never fully acknowledged the perpetually distraught state that Dario had been in after his capture.
“...I ruined his life, Stonegit. He should have died. I worry that he will carry that with him to the grave. You can absolutely hate the man that I’ve become. I sure as Hel know that I do. You can blame me for everything. Abandoning my family, friends, allies... I don’t deserve anything good in this life anymore. I know this.”
Vox pushed himself away, nearly tripping as he stepped away from Stonegit.
“No amount of apologies will make this right. I’ve all but grown to accept that at this point... but do not ever, for a moment, believe that Dario could have been the one strong enough to carry that weight for the both of us. It should have been me, and I failed. I don’t deserve anything more than the pain I’ve inflicted on everyone who matters in my life.”
The scout turned to take leave as quickly as he could. It would be insult to injury to allow anyone to see him cry more than he already had.
moe-lazyeye
Stonegit's arm swung out and caught the back of his shirt. He yanked him back so he could turn him around. Vox didn't see it, but all of the bodyguards instincts were flaring up over the shove, but it was kept in check. "You're not going anywhere until your head is on straight scout."
His jaw was clenched as he pointed a finger. "Let's get one thing straight. I don't hate you, and the last thing I want is to spend more time not seeing you. Secondly, I'll blame anyone for their part of a problem. Dario isn't special enough to avoid that, no one is. Shoulder more issues? No...say something like 'hey let's go see your family, it's been three months'...absolutely. Like it or not, you two isolated yourselves and made yourselves accountable to one another in this matter."
He drew a slow breath. "Vox you need to think of a plan. A real one, before you go walking out another door."
voxarnason
He couldn’t fight the dichotomy violently pulling him in two directions. Every single thing Stonegit said was precise; calculated and true beyond contention... and yet, every fiber of Vox’s being wanted to push the man square in the face.
“A plan, Stonegit?” He noticed his voice elevating once more. “To fix the insurmountable level of fuckery I’ve caused here? I’ve got a plan for you, buddy. Why don’t you just kill me?”
He stared Stonegit down with a defeated scowl. There was no fighting the loathing he felt for himself, and he had to try and keep his own internal desires from manifesting further.
“I- I don’t know how to fix this. I don’t have a plan. I have already tried to talk with Tree, with Liam... Hel, even Dario isn’t exactly enamored with me at the moment. I know that actions speak louder than words, but I don’t know what I can do here that will set things right.” He used the back of his hand to wipe the tears rolling down his face. “Did I mention... did I tell you that the night I left... it was late. I tried to quietly depart when Liam found me. I couldn’t bring myself to explain what was happening to Dario, and just.. I told him that I would be gone for a bit. I didn’t know how things were going to go, and I know in my heart that he will never be able to separate himself from that night. I’ve placed a burden on him that can never be lifted, and I don’t know how to even begin the healing process there.”
He took a seat on the nearing stool available to him, continuing to remove any signs of emotional distress from his face.
“There is no making up for lost time here. I can’t unhurt those I love, and I can’t take back the atrocious decisions I made. The most I’m able to be is... present... and even then, it’s absolutely rejected by everyone, except for Kendra.” He inadvertently signed her name as he spoke it. “I want so badly to be able to make things right. I’ve spent all this time trying to think of a way to do it, and I’m prepared to do whatever it takes. I am not leaving again, I can promise you all that... but I’m at a loss. If I don’t deserve the chance to make amends, how can I ever hope to accomplish it?”
moe-lazyeye
Stonegit sighed, and sat down across from him once again. “Everyone except Kendra…and me…”
He folded his hands. “My days of trying to kill my friends are also long behind me Vox. So unfortunately killing you isn’t an option.”
That was a half joke.
“Neither is making up for lost time, or making any of this right. But…that doesn’t mean that there isn’t a right thing to do. Ironically, all that you just said narrows down what kind of plan you’ll actually need.” Stonegit chewed the inside of his cheek thoughtfully.
“Present may be all you have to offer. If you’re rejected, you’re rejected. But there are ways to be present in the face of something like this that does right by the people that were harmed….I can help you.”
He couldn’t believe the proposition before him. Vox had grown to understand that he would be essentially isolated anymore, so the idea that someone could offer him a hand after his transgressions was foreign.
“That… I would appreciate that very much, Stonegit. I’m sorry for all of this.” He rapped his knuckles against the hard surface of the table under them. “I haven’t been able to process everything since I returned. Tree wouldn’t speak to me, Liam went so far as to try and hurt me, and Dario is off with Milae doing Gods know what…” 
He looked at Stonegit with an aura of exhaustion.
“I owe everyone whatever I can give them. I cannot change my past, and I can’t undo the damage I’ve done, but I can make an attempt at a future they can feel safe in. That’s all I want for them.”
“It won’t go well most days.” Stonegit said realistically. “Rock in a hard place. People won’t want your efforts, and definitely won’t want to see your guilt. Ironically. But that’s the path, and it’s the right one to take.”
“So first things first. You loathe yourself. As much as feeling appropriate remorse for your wrongdoings is needed, the more you hate you, the more the problem becomes about you. And things need to be about Tree, Liam, and Kendra from now on. So…what’s going to help you processes some of that self hatred? What’s going to shelve it long enough that you can focus on everything else?”    
He stared down at his hand for a moment, thinking of all the things he wanted to do to make up for the last ten years. A way to amend all of the pain he’d caused…
“I want to carry the weight of the hurt that those I’ve cared about had to endure during my absence. I want to understand just how badly I fucked up, Stonegit. I want to be able to take that away from them, if even just for a moment, so they can move on with their lives like they deserve to, even if it’s without me. It would devastate me, but I would understand.”
Stonegit pressed his lips together. Was this how Haddock had felt during his many, emotional ramblings so many years back/ Vox was getting closer to the mark, especially in regards to alleviating the pain even for a moment, and finding a way for people to move on. 
However, there was still an awful lot about that last statement that was still about Vox. Self depreciating or not. “Focus for me buddy.” Stonegit said as he gripped his shoulder reassuringly. “Alleviate pain, help people move on, all good. Carrying the weight of an issue and wanting to endure what they endured on the other hand…it won’t help anything. You’re guilty, for good reason, and you acknowledge how and why. Outside of that, you’ve got to let the rest of that go. It’ll only get in the way of you doing the good parts of what you said.”
“You’ll never feel what they felt. So there is no point in trying or wasting effort beating yourself up further. Life and this situation will take care of that for you all on its own. So what’s it going to take to set aside the excess loathing? Cussing yourself out? Breaking shit? Sticking your head in ice water until it throbs? Doesn’t matter. Name what’s it going to take to clear your head, so you can focus. Cause I promise no one that matters will care that you feel bad.”
He pondered on Stonegit’s words for a moment. He was so right; nobody wanted to hear his sob story.
“I… I just want to have some sort of tangible punishment for my actions. I don’t feel like I’ve been properly chastised for all of this, and I almost just want to punch myself in the face so I can feel like I’ve at least atoned for it and move on.”
He jokingly pushed his fist into his face.
“That’ll do it, I guess.”
Stonegit drummed his fingers a few times in thought. 
He thought about it.
He pondered it.
And he decided that despite his support and desire to help, he was still mad enough to do it. 
“Vox…” Stonegit said paused when the scout looked up to meet his gaze. He gently nodded his head. “I think I can help you with that.”
And that’s when everything went black.
When Vox opened his eyes again a few moments later, he was starring at a blurry, fuzzy ceiling as Stonegit’s garbled voice gently encouraged him to keep steady, and a hand helped pull him into a sitting position. 
Getting punched by the bodyguard was like getting tail slapped by a dragon. Despite Stonegit’s unassuming appearance it was clear that he knew how to use every last bit of himself when throwing a closed fist.
Stonegit brushed him off a little as he propped him up against the bar. “There…you’ve been chastised. Now let’s get to work, what do you say pal?”
Vox couldn’t feel his face anymore. The time between hearing Stonegit’s words and coming to grips on the floor was instantaneous; a flash of light and he was done. He could feel the man pulling him up, with ears ringing and sight not quite restored.
“…ughgh…”
He put his hand to his nose, which was remarkably damp at this point. Definitely blood.
“…I deserved that. Thanks, Stonegit.” His words escaped through a nasal tone while he held his hand against his face. “That was… surprisingly cathartic… now, what do we do from here?”
“Eh…we get you cleaned up…” Stonegit started as he brought over a rag to help contain the bleeding. Punching Vox hadn’t felt super great, but it seemed to have gotten what needed to be done, done. “Next, you go sleep on these thoughts. And after that, you need to re-establish yourself with the people you’ve wronged. One at a time, find out what will serve them the best.”
He shrugged. “It might be never talking to them again. It might be getting to know them all over again from step one. An apology and acknowledgment of wrong is needed, just no talk about how bad you feel. That’s what the punch took care of. And then just…stick around. Be part of this rebellion, this family again. Your role has changed Vox. But you’re still wanted, and there is another you still might be able to fill…lastly…pour your heart and soul into caring for Liam, Kendra, and Tree. However you are able to. Make it so that whatever they are facing you are there to help, whether they accept that or not, make sure you’re always ready anyway.”
“…whether they accept that or not…”
That would prove to be difficult, but regardless of the outcome, Vox had to try. It was owed at this point.
“Right… thank you, bud. I can’t tell you how much this means… and I’m sorry for being so aggressive earlier. That’s not who I want to be anymore.” He held the rag close to his face, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. “I’m ready to be a better man. If there is anything I can help with, please let me know. I’m prepared to do what it takes.”
He leaned forward, with his face starting to feel the sting a little more as time went on. The few drinks he downed helped take some of that edge off.
“But you made a good point – sleep sounds pretty good right about now.”
Stonegit motioned over his shoulder. “You’re welcome to the wash room and the loft just up that ladder…”
He paused, and then helped him up. “Don’t worry about the agression. I’m good, and the best way to help me, is to just do whatever right is left by them.”
He stood and extended his hand to Stonegit. It was a strange experience, to say the least, but it was necessary to put him in a better frame of mind than when he first entered.
“I guess I’ll get cleaned up and take it easy for the rest of the night… you let me know if anything comes up. For now, I’m going to take this to heart and try to make things better for everyone around me. I owe at least that much.”
Category:BOTGD 2
Category:Events
Category:Act II
Category:Stonegit Brotchurn Elmiss
Category:Vox Arnason