Wiki of Horror!

== Script ==
SYNOPSIS - Join Crash Bandicoot and H.U.N.T.E.R and read three chilling stories. One about a fnaf nerd who goes pyscho at a mansion, one about a halloween special gone wrong, and another about a toy that you should never throw away.
(It starts off showing a dark night time in Pensacola. It then zooms through the city thats filled with people trick or treated and houses decorated in halloween. It then zooms to the town hall where Crash Bandicoot (Dressed as Jack Skellington) and H.U.N.T.E.R (Dressed as Frankenstien's monster) are seen)
Crash Bandicoot: Greetings one and all! And welcome to the town hall. I am former prime minister and current Mayor of Pensacola, Crash Bandicoot! And that is my personal assistant/armour, H.U.N.T.E.R!
H.U.N.T.E.R: Hello.
Crash Bandicoot: Tonight, we have three spine tingling stories to tell you while we wait for our halloween party to commence!
H.U.N.T.E.R : So what story will we read first, Crash?
Crash: Glad you asked H.U.N.T.E.R, the first story is about a group of friends that decide to head over and caretake a mansion while the owners are gone, but little do they know, one of the caretakers is going crazy after losing access to Pizza Rolls and Wifi. Let us take a looksies.
----TALE 1 - The Shinning!
----(It starts off with a car driving through a wavy road. In the car is revealed to be Culdee driving with Human Meggy in the passenger seat. In the backseat are Lil Fred, JJ and Beta Tari)
Tuesday
Culdee: Well its been a long drive, but we're almost there.
Human Meggy: Hey Culdee, did you remember to lock the front door?
Culdee: ...
(it cuts to the car driving through the same wavy road)
Wednesday
Culdee: Well its been another 2 hour trip, but we're almost there again.
Human Meggy: When you locked the front door, did you remember to lock the back?
Culdee: ... ...
Thursday
(Everyone is seen in the car with tired faces with Beta Tari missing. JJ then gets shocked)
JJ: Oh no! We forgot Beta Tari at the gas station!
(No one responds and Culdee keeps driving)
JJ: What about Beta Tari?
(The car then drives up to a huge mansion where Badman and Heart Head are seen)
Badman: Ah goody! The sea monkeys I ordered have arrived! Haha look at them. Covort and caper.
Heart Head: Uhhh Badman? They're the new winter caretakers for the lodge.
Badman: Yes. They work hard and they play hard.
(It shows Badman and Heart Head showing the four around the place)
Badman: This house has quite a long and colorful history. It was built on ancient indian burial ground, and is the setting of satanic rituals, witch burnings, and five John Denver christmas specials.
Culdee: "shivers" John Denver.
(Suddenly they stop in their tracks when an elevator opens spilling out a bunch of blood)
Badman: Hmmm thats odd. Usually the blood happens on the second floor.
(It then cuts outside to a hedge maze where Chives is seen cutting the maze when a chainsaw is seen sawing through the maze scaring him. A hole then falls through the maze revealling it to be Lil Fred with the chainsaw)
Lil Fred: "Honk!" (Hey I found a shortcut through your hedge maze!)
(Chives looks through and sees that Fred has cut through all of the walls of the maze)
Chives: Grrr! Why you little- (thinking) "No no. Go easy on the little one. Master Culdee's gonna go crazy and chop me into haggis."
Lil Fred: "Honk?" (What's haggis?)
Chives: (speaking) *gasp* Young one, you read my thoughts! You got the shinning!
Lil Fred: "Honk.?" (you mean shining?)
Chives: Shhh! Now do you want to get sued? Now listen boy, if Culdee goes crazy, just use that "Shin" of yours, to call me and ill come running. But dont be reading my mind between four and five! That's Chives' time.
(It then cuts to Heart Head destroying the wifi router and lifting boxes of pizza rolls to Badman's car where he is seen waiting)
Badman: Yes by cutting off the Wifi and the Pizza roll supply, I can ensure an honest winter's work out of those low lifes.
Heart Head: Badman? Do you ever stop to think that maybe it was doing this that caused the previous caretakers to go insane and kill their families?
Badman: Hmmm perhaps your right. Tell you what. When we come back and everyones slaughtered, I owe you a coke.
(The two get into the car and drive away. It then transitions to night time. Culdee is seen on his Ipad, Human Meggy is seen on her phone and Lil Fred and JJ are playing scrabble. Culdee then tries to go on discord but the internet is having problems)
Culdee: Hmm. Internets out.
(Culdee puts his Ipad down)
Culdee: Think I'll have some pizza rolls.
(Culdee goes into the fridge to see theres nothing)
Culdee: Hmm. Not a roll in the house. What do you know?
Human Meggy: Culdee im impressed! Your actually taking this quite well!
Culdee: I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU!
Human Meggy: CULDEE!
Culdee: Sorry. Sorry. Theres plenty I can do to keep myself occupied. Maybe i'll check out that axe collection.
(Culdee walks out the door. He then pokes his head back in)
Culdee: "creepily" See you later...
(Culdee leaves slamming the door shut)
JJ: Human Meggy, is Culdee gonna kill us?
Human Meggy: Guess we're gonna have to wait and see.
(Culdee is seen waiting at an empty bar area. Dave Miller dressed in a tuxedo fades in)
Dave Miller: What'll it be Culdee?
Culdee: DAVE! GIVE ME PIZZA ROLLS!
Dave Miller: No. Not unless you kill your family.
Culdee: Why should I kill my family?
Dave Miller: Ummm, they'd be much happier as ghosts.
Culdee: You dont look so happy.
Dave Miller: OH IM HAPPY! IM VERY HAPPY! LA LA LA LA LA LA LA! SEE!?
(Dave then grabs Culdee by the shirt)
Dave Miller: NOW ERASE YOUR FAMILY AND I'LL GIVE YOU PIZZA ROLLS!
(It then cuts to the dark ball room. Human Meggy is seen looking around)
Human Meggy: Culdee? Culdee?
(She then sees a typewriter)
Human Meggy: Hm. What is typed will be a window into his madness.
(Human Meggy looks at the typewriter and see's the words "Feeling Fine" on it)
Human Meggy: Oh thats a relief.
(Suddenly lightning strikes and it shows the words "No Wifi and No Pizza Rolls makes Culdee go crazy" put all around the room)
Human Meggy: Hm. This is less encouraging.
(Culdee then breaks down the door)
Culdee: HELLO!
Human Meggy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Culdee: (Looking tired) Well what do you think, Meggy? All I need is a title. I was thinking something along the lines of "No Wifi and no pizza rolls makes Culdee something something".
Human Meggy: Go crazy?
Culdee: DONT MIND IF I DO! WAALOLOLOLOLOLOL! WAL. BAEJDBAKFDBAF. E ER E ER E ER E ER E ER! VT VT! HANAMANA! WOLOLOLOL!
(Culdee chases after Human Meggy who screams grabbing a bat
Human Meggy: STAY AWAY FROM ME, CULDEE!
(Culdee comes closer causing her to keep swinging it at Culdee while she slowly heads up stairs)
Culdee: Give me the bat, Meggy! Come on! Give me the bat! Come on! GIVE ME THE BABABA LALALALALALALA. Hahaha! Scaredy cat.
(Culdee does a scary face. He looks into the mirror and gets frightened)
Culdee: AHHHHHHHHH!
(Culdee falls down the stairs being knocked out. Human Meggy grabs Culdee and puts him in the freezer)
Human Meggy: Now you stay here until your not insane. Ooh Chilli would be good tonight!
(Human Meggy grabs a can of Chilli and leaves the freezer locking the door behind her. Hours later, Culdee is seen in the freezer eating all of the food. A knock on the door is heard)
Dave Miller: (voice) Hey Culdee? It's Dave. Yeah look some of the ghouls and I are a little concerned that the project isnt moving forward.
Culdee: Can't murder now! Eating.
Dave Miller: (voice) oh for christs sake.
(Dave opens the door and he comes in along with Dracula, Jason Vorhees, A Werewolf, Pinhead, Freddy Kruger and a mummy come in and drag Culdee out of the freezer)
Culdee: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(It then cuts to Human Meggy, Lil Fred and JJ in the dining room eating. Culdee is seen outside a door with an axe and breaks down the door poking his head through it)
Culdee: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERES CULDEE!
(Culdee then looks around and sees he is in an empty room)
Culdee: ...
(Culdee breaks through another door)
Culdee: HEEEEEERE IS FNAF NERD!
(Culdee then sees hes in a room that only has Susie and Kris in it from "Deltarune")
Susie: God damn it, Kris! Where the hell are we?!
Culdee: ...
(Culdee breaks through another door holding a watch)
Culdee: I'm Mike Wallace! I'm Morley Safer! And i'm Ed Bradley! All this and Andy Rooney tonight on 60 minutes.
(Culdee happens to actually be in the room where the 3 are and they all run away in fear. Culdee breaks down the door completley and chases after them. They run into a room. Human Meggy grabs a radio and calls the police with it. Brooklyn Guy is seen on the other side)
Human Meggy: (Voice) Hello!? Police!? This is Meggy Spletzer! My boyfriend is on a murderous rampage! Over!
Brooklyn Guy: Oh. Well thank god thats over. I was getting worried there for a second.
(It cuts back to the three)
Human Meggy: No answer!
Lil Fred: (Honk) "Dont worry Meggy. I can use my "shinning" to call chives!"
(Fred closes his eyes. It then cuts to Chives on his Ipad when he gets the signal)
Chives: Uh oh. The plushboy and his friends are in trouble!
(Chives runs out of his house)
Chives: I'M COMING TO RESCUE THE LOT OF YOU!
(Chives breaks through the mansion door)
Chives: Alright you looney! Show me what you got!
(Culdee appears behind Chives and axes him in the back)
Chives: HAH! Is that the best you can do!?
(Chives falls down bleeding all over the rug)
Human Meggy: Oh my! I hope that rug was scotch garden.
(Culdee walks up to a wall of axes and grabs one)
Culdee: Must... kill... family...
(The three run out of the house with Culdee once again pursuing them. The three find it hard to move through the thick snow and they fall down. JJ sees an Ipad with discord running on it and shows it to Culdee who is about to swing his axe)
JJ: CULDEE! LOOK!
(Culdee snaps back to his sense and grabs the Ipad)
Culdee: WIFI! TEACHER! MOTHER! Secret lover..... Urge to kill fading.... fading... RISING!
(The three get scared)
Culdee: Fading... fading...... gone...
(The three do a sigh of relief)
Culdee: Come family... sit in the snow and let us all bask in the internet's warm glowing warm glow.
(Everyone gathers around. It then cuts to hours later where they are all seen frozen while they are watching youtube. Suddenly an hour long ad appears)
Lil Fred: "Shivering Honk" (C-c-culdee. S-skip a-add)
Culdee: C-c-cant, F-f-frozen!
(The ad plays as all of them watch the ad in boredom and horror)
Culdee: Urge to kill... rising.....
----H.U.N.T.E.R: Wow. That was a spooky story about a man trying to murder his family. Good that it was happy in the end!
Crash: For the most part, as the characters were forced to watch an hour long ad without skipping it.
H.U.N.T.E.R: True.
Crash: This next story is about a duo of roommates who try to make the best halloween special ever, but things dont go as planned...
----Tale 2 - Da Moist Epik Halowbean stoie eveh. (Yes that title was intentional)
(It shows at Endless and Izuru's apartment. Izuru is seen waiting at a table with a scrabble game set up while Endless is seen chopping lettuce)
Endless: I mean why wont they even let me insult the characters just a little bit! A small roast wont even hurt them.
Izuru: I'm ready for some f***ing scrabble.
Endless: How can I even take this type of rejection! I cant even get this toast to come out!
(Endless is seen waving the knife around in a toaster)
Endless: I need to insult some art or im gonna flip.
(Theres a knock on the door. Endless answers it)
Endless: You all better be artwork.
(Endless then sees Tanner and Bully Bill in costumes. Tanner is dressed as an astronaut and Bully is seen dressed as King Kong)
Tanner and Bully Bill: Trick or treat dude!
Endless: "gasp" OH MAH GAWD ITS HALLOWEEN WE FORGOT TO DO OUR SPECIAL!
(Endless slams the door)
Endless: IZURU, START CARVING SOMETHING IMMEDIENTLY!
(Izuru brings out his katana)
Endless: We gotta do our halloween special RIGHT NOW!
(Insert lame intro here.)
(It then cuts to Endless dressed as spiderman and Izuru dressed as a hotdog in a talk show like setting with cheap halloween decorations)
Endless: Look how spooky we're getting this time yall! I'm here with my co host roomate, Izuru!
Izuru: This costume smells like someone dropped a caramel apple in it.
Endless: Thats disgusting. Here to inform you about erie halloween bargans, its ya boi. Endless!
(START AD!)
Endless: I love a good bargan, but going to the store can be a real pain in the ass. But you would wanna do halloween with things you can find, right here in your own house! Dont got any cobwebs?
(Endless brings out a long extension cord)
Endless: Deck the halls with this spooky extension cord! Dont got a pumpkin!
(Endless brings out a basketball with a jack o lantern face drawn on it)
Endless: Turn a simple ball, into the bell of the ball!
Scott Pilgrim: That sounds stupid.
Endless: You know Scott, recently you been-
(It cuts to Endless around a computer)
Endless: And if you still insist on shopping, follow these steps! Step 1! Apply for a basic credit card! Now its time to move on to step 2, buy from your favorite online stores! Step 3! Incinerate your credit card!
(Endless grabs the credit card he applied for and throws it in the oven)
Endless: Step 4! Its time to file for chapter 7! "whispering" Bankruptcy. And just repeat steps 1-4 to unlock yourself an unlimited halloween budget!
(Theres then knocks on the door)
Goodman: IRS! OPEN UP!
Endless: Sh*t! How did they find me!? This isnt even my house!
(Goodman kicks down the door)
Goodman: YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST-
(Goodman then sees Endless wearing a spiderman mask)
Goodman: Oh. Sorry Spiderman. Im trying to locate a guy named, "Eendless"?
Endless: Endless and its a perm.
Goodman: Oh. My mistake-
(Endless slams the door in Goodman's face)
Goodman: Oooookay then.
(Endless takes off his mask)
Endless: Well that was a close one. Now lets transition to Izuru for some trick or treating tips, while I sneak out the back door!
(It then cuts to Izuru outside an apartment door)
Izuru: Trick or treatings a b*tch and heres how you do it.
Trick or Treating with Izuru (instert surname here)!
(Izuru is seen running up to a candy bowl)
Izuru: Now let us see what tricks and treats they have right here-
(Izuru then sees the bowl is full of granola)
Izuru: W-whats this?! GRANOLA!? What's with all this healthy sh*t!? MOTHER F*CKER!
(Izuru throws the granola at the door. He then gives the bowl to Scott Pilgrim)
Izuru: Here take this! Im running to my car!
(Izuru returns with a carton of eggs)
Izuru: YOU ARE ALL ACOMPLICES! LETS GET THIS SH*T DONE, YEAHHH!
(Izuru starts throwing eggs at the door. Scott and Raphael try to stop him. Izuru angrilly bashes Scott on the head with the carton. Izuru then grabs rocks)
Izuru: Cheap sons of b*tches!
Scott: Great, he's got rocks now.
(Raphael runs to Izuru who keeps throwing rocks at the apartment)
Raphael: ARE YOU EVEN GONNA HELP MAN!?
Scott: My head is damaged from that carton of eggs.
Raphael: SERIOUSLY!?
(Izuru grabs a brick)
Izuru: IM GONNA KILL THESE SONS OF-
(Raphael grabs Izuru's arm)
Izuru: OW LET GO MY ARM!
(Izuru pushes Raph away and grabs a gas can and a match)
Izuru: I AM NOT FROM NEBRASKA!
Scott: Nobody said you were.
(Izuru is seen drenching the apartment complex with gasoline)
Izuru: And that's how you trick or treat, kids! Back over to you, Izuru!
(Izuru lights the place on fire and runs off. Izuru then runs back to the studio)
Izuru: Thanks, Izuru!
Endless: Izuru that was our apartment.
(Suddenly the lights turn off)
Izuru: WHAT THE F*CK!?
(Sirens start wailing)
Endless: Oh my word, Iz! Thats a siren! Someone needs our help!
Izuru: NO WE NEED HELP CAUSE WHEN THE POWER CUTS OUT, THE BUILDING LOCKS DOWN!
Endless: Oh puppycock.
Izuru: WE'VE GOT 2 HOURS WORTH OF OXYGEN LEFT BEFORE WE DIE!
Endless: "inhale" Oh my... "inhale" GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!
Izuru: You're taking us down to one, f****t!
Endless: Izuru, dont panick, we'll be provided something eventually!
Izuru: WELL TELL THEM TO PROVIDE A WAY OUT OF THIS S***HOLE!
Endless: Okey dokey!
(Scott runs past Endless)
Scott Pilgrim: Outa my way mouthess f*ck. (To Izuru) You think you can just hit me with a carton and GET AWAY WITH IT!
Izuru: You know you have a really weak skull if your gonna get hurt by a carton of eggs.
Scott Pilgrim: YOU KNOW WHAT!?
(Scott brings out his gutair and Izuru brings out his katana. The two start beating eachother up. Raphael comes out to stop the fight)
Raphael: Guys! Fightings not gonna solve our problems!
(Izuru stabs Raphael in the arm accidentally)
Izuru: Woops.
Raphael: ...
(Raph brings out an enchanted sword and the three get into an all out fight. Endless just walks away)
Endless: Anyways, while they are killing-
(Goodman then pops out a vent)
Goodman: AHA I GOT YOU!
Endless: AHHHH!
(Endless puts on his Spider-Man mask)
Endless: SCOTT QUICK! PRETEND TO BE MARY JANE!
(Scott puts on a wig)
Scott: Woah man i'm Mary Jane!
Goodman: My mistake again, Spider-Man.
Endless: Big time your mistake, now I got spidey things to tend to so get lost!
(Endless runs off as Scott, Izuru and Raphael continue fighting. Endless takes off his mask as Goodman goes back in the vents)
Endless: While they are all killing eachother, Its about time we turn on the commercial break. It's me, Endless! *wink*
(Tv static appears. It shows a pissed of car retailor around a whole lot of cars)
Car Retailor: F*ck you, Baltimore! If you're dumb enough to buy a new car this weekend, you're a big enough schmuck to come to Big Bill Hell's Cars. Bad Deals! Cars that break down!! Thieves!!! If you think that you're gonna find a bargain at Big Bill's, you can kiss my ass! It's our belief that you're such a stupid motherf*cker, you'll fall for this bullsh*t! Guaranteed! If you find a better deal, SHOVE IT UP YOUR UGLY ASS!! You heard us right, SHOVE IT UP YOUR UGLY ASS!!! Bring your trade, bring your title, bring your wife! We'll f*ck her! That's Right! We'll f*ck your wife! Because at Big Bill Hell's, you're f*cked six way to Sunday! Take a hike to Big Bill Hell's! Home of challenge pissing! That's right, challenge pissing! How does it work? If you can piss 6 feet in the air straight up and not get wet, you get no down payment. Don't wait, don't delay. Don't f*ck with us, or we'll rip your nuts off! Only at Big Bill Hell's: The only dealer that tells you to f*ck off! Hurry up, asshole! This event ends the minute after you write us a check, and it better not bounce or you're a dead motherf*cker! Go to hell! Big Bill Hell's Cars: Baltimore's filthiest and exclusive home of the meanest sons of b*tches of the state of Maryland. Guaranteed!
(The commercial then ends and shows a news broadcast with Breadmonster. In the background are a bunch of zombies roaming around)
Breadmonster: Still under attack by zombies and with me are the two perps who claim to start this zombie apockalypse!
(Breadmonster lends the mic to Tanner and Bully Bill)
Bully Bill: No one was giving us any candy.
Tanner: Yeah so we stole these needles from the hospital and poked random people with them and now they're zombies.
Breadmonster: Well you heard it here folks! Spooky is as spooky does-
(Breadmonster screams as he is attacked by zombies. Endless, Izuru, Scott and Raphael are seen all watching the TV in fear)
Izuru: Everyone! Grab a weapon! We need to defend ourselves!
(It then cuts to the four having weapons. Endless is seen with a knife, Raph is seen with gas and a match, Scott is seen with a plunger, and Izuru is seen with his one and only katana)
Endless: Good weapons! Now that anyone of us can kill the rest of us, we're safe!
Scott Pilgrim: Its prolly best we try to defend eachother no matter what.
Izuru: Its a zombie apockalypse asshole. We'll probably end up eating eachother! Lets start with blockhead!
Raphael: Oh speak for yourself, c*nt.
Endless: Alright there are snacks upstairs, i'll go get some.
Raphael: I could use some chips ahoy.
Endless: You ate the chips ahoy you piggly wiggly.
Raphael: I AM SICK OF YOU-
(Endless starts going upstairs)
Endless: Now would be a good time to plug in our sponsor! The oopsy daisy child beating stick! Now with a legal limit in some states! These beatings sticks come in 7 different colors, but it only leaves your child one! Purple! Because when your child-
(A giant crashing sound is heard)
Endless: What was that? Alright I was supposed to get snacks! Let me check on my friends first.
(Endless heads downstairs where he sees Izuru inaudibly talking. He then turns his head around 180 degrees)
Izuru: (In Raphael's voice) Endless, you suck at everything combat related.
Endless: Oh your just being toxic that I beat you during the purge.
(Raphael then comes up)
Raphael: (In Scott's voice) Because of you im underrated.
Endless: Underrated smunderated!
(Scott comes up)
Scott Pilgrim: (In Izuru's voice) I pity living with you, Endless.
Endless: YOU'RE ALL A BUNCH OF ASSHOLES!
(Endless then bumps into the real Izuru. Endless gets scared and stabs Izuru a whole bunch cauing Izuru to scream in pain and fall to the floor. Endless realizes what he's done and runs into a bunker. He then turns around and sees Chives)
Chives: Run Endless! They're not gone yet-
(Raphael appears and axes Chives in the back killing him yet again)
Raphael: Want a rematch, Endless. Hehehehehe. Ahahahahaha! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA!
(Scotts head is seen floating around and Izuru speaking gibberish is heard)
Endless: GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
(Endless then suddenly appears where he was at the beggining of the tale with the chopped up lettuce and Izuru with a scrabble game)
Endless: Izuru what day is it?
Izuru: It's Hallo- It's halloween! We forgot to do our special-
Endless: NO! NO!
(The door knocks. Endless runs to it with a bowl of Candy and chucks the candy at Tanner and Bully Bill)
Endless: Here have some candy, get lost!
Bully Bill: Hey what are you-
(Endless closes the door in relief)
Endless: Phew. I could really use some scrabble right about now.
(Endless sits next to Izuru)
Izuru: sounds to me you just avoided some serious sh*t.
Endless: I really learned a lesson tonight. It's that you really can go back in time and erase all of your problems in life!
(Goodman appears behind Endless)
Goodman: Almost all of them.
(Endless gets a shocked face while Izuru starts laughing as the tale ends)
----Crash: Oh Endless and Izuru. Those two are always up to the strangest things imaginable.
H.U.N.T.E.R: True. They are prolly the strangest duo in the SFU. So what's next Crash?
Crash: This final story is about a man trying to throw away his old stuffed animals, but one of them doesnt take being thrown away well, and comes back to kill everyone that he loves so they can be the only one loved again.
H.U.N.T.E.R: Oh ho HO! Now we are getting into the good stuff!
----Tale 3 - Benny Loves You!
(It starts off at Nintendo Headquarters where Mario is seen in Mr. Goodman's office)
Mr. Goodman: I'm sorry Mario, but i just dont know how long we can keep you here since we are hardly coming up with anymore ideas for Mario games.
Mario: Well why dont we just do another installment of New Super Mario Bros?
Goodman: We already done so much installments of that, the fans are getting bored. "sigh" I'm sorry Mario, but I need to let you go.
Mario: WHAT!? No please! How am I supposed to pay my bills!?
Goodman: Look i'm sorry but-
Mario: Please! Just give me another chance! I've been doing this for years.
Goodman: "sigh" Alright Mario if your that desperate. Me and the rest of nintendo are planning to hold a halloween party and we decided to choose your house as the setting of the party.
Mario: Sweet!
Goodman: And one thing, if your house is messy. "Inhale" YOU'RE FIIREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED! Need I say more?
Mario: Don't worry Goodman. I'll make sure my house is spic and span before the halloween party.
Goodman: Splended. You got under a week to get it set up.
Mario: You can count on me.
(It then cuts to the SML house. Mario is seen carrying out boxes from his room)
Jeffy: Hey Daddy! What are you doing?
Mario: Oh hey Jeffy, im just moving a bunch of boxes out of my room.
Jeffy: Why?
Mario: So I can move them to the attic and make my house spic and span for Nintendo's halloween party! They chosen my house to be the location of their party.
Jeffy: Oh!
Mario: Yep! And you better not make any messes right now, because I need to keep my house clean by the end of the week!
Jeffy: Okay. Uh Daddy?
Mario: What Jeffy?
Jeffy: I have to tell you something.
Mario: What is it?
Jeffy: I kinda made a mess in the kitchen.
Mario: WHAT!?
Jeffy: Yeah come look.
(Jeffy leads Mario to the kitchen where a huge mess is made)
Mario:...
Jeffy: Yeahhhhhh I was mad that Chef Pee Pee wouldnt let me have cheerios during dinner so i went on a rampage and destroyed the table and Pee Pee ran off.
Mario: JEFFY! WE CANT HAVE THESE MESSES ANYMORE! I need to get the place clean for the halloween party for nintendo! if my house is a mess, i'm getting FIRED! DO YOU REALIZE THAT!?
Jeffy: Why?
Mario: GGRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR- "inhale" "exhale" You know what? It's fine. I still have a while before Goodman and the others show up. I'll just clean this up.
Jeffy: Okay daddy. I love you!
Mario: "sigh" I love you to.
(Mario gets to cleaning up the kitchen while Jeffy runs off. It then cuts to 30 minutes later. The kitchen is finally cleaned)
Mario: There we go. Now to get back to the boxes.
(Mario goes back to the boxes only to trip on one of Jeffy's toys causing the contents of the box to fall out. One of them being a stuffed red teddy wearing a blue jacket)
Mario: AGH!
(Mario sees he tripped on Jeffy's toy bulldozer)
Mario: JEFFYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
Jeffy: Yeah daddy?
Mario: You left your toy bulldozer on the floor for me to trip on it! I COULD HAVE DIED!
Jeffy: Jeez, Sorry Daddy. I'll go put it back in my room.
Mario: Yeah you should.
Jeffy: Love you!
Mario: Whatever.
(Jeffy takes away his bulldozer while Mario puts everything back in the box. He then pauses when he sees the red teddy. He picks it up)
Benny: It's Benny!
(Mario smiles and theres suddenly a flashback to the 80s. A man wearing red overalls and a blue cap and shirt is seen drinking while watching movies while a woman with blonde hair and a purple dress comes downstairs)
Woman: Drinking on a saturday night, Jumpman? Really?
Jumpman: (Drunk) Hey don't talk to me like that, Pauline. It's the weekend I can do what I want.
Woman: I mean I know, but we still have a toddler kid in our house! You hardly pay any attention to him.
Jumpman: (Drunk) Big deal. Let him grow up and figure out things himself.
(A baby is heard crying upstairs)
Pauline: Great now he's crying. You know, maybe if you were a better father, we'd never have to deal with him crying in the middle of night! You know.. Maybe if you actually went to rehab, I wouldn't have to be the only one working tirelessly to help our child, WHILE YOU'RE SITTING ON YOUR ASS ALL DAY WATCHING B RATED MOVIES-
(An annoyed Jumpman grabs a bottle and smashes it shocking Pauline)
Jumpman: (Drunk) I DON'T NEED ANOTHER LECTURE RIGHT NOW! Look! Incase you keep forgetting, I'm the breadwinner of this house! I pay the bills! So you should show me some RESPECT! And don't forget the time I worked my ass off saving you from Cranky Kong.
Pauline: Hey when you saved me from Cranky Kong, you we're a different person back then! You were a sober nice handsome person! Now look at you. I don't even think your the same Jumpman anymore.
(Jumpman ignores Pauline's lectures and continues watching TV)
Pauline: LOOK AT ME!
(Jumpman continues to ignore her)
Pauline: "Scoff" You know, even though you're acting like this, I still love you, and I know you can change.
(Pauline goes upstairs. A baby Mario is seen shivering in fear as he sees a monster in the closet. He continues crying as Pauline tends to him. The monster in the closet disapears)
Pauline: Shhhhhhh. It's okay. Don't cry.
Baby Mario: "sniff" Why were you and daddy yelling at eachother, mommy?
Pauline: Mommy and Daddy are just having some... issues.
Baby Mario: Are you two not in love anymore?
Pauline: No we still love eachother. Each pair of parents always have arguments you know?
Baby Mario: Oh.
Pauline: Is that the reason you were crying?
Baby Mario: No. Well kind of. I'm scared of the monsters in my closet.
Pauline: Oh. Well stay right there. I think I have just the thing.
(Pauline runs to her room and looks in her closet. She brings out a box with Benny in it.)
Benny: Oh wow!
(Pauline walks to Mario's room. She shows Benny to Mario)
Pauline: This is Benny! Back then my parents tended to argue all the time and i was scared of monsters as well. But I always had Benny to protect me from any danger.
(Pauline gives Benny to Mario)
Baby Mario: So he can protect me from anything?
Pauline: Yes.
Baby Mario: Even the monsters in my closets?
Pauline: Apart from them?
Baby Mario: "gasp"
Pauline: I'm just kidding. Now you and Benny get some rest, you got daycare tommorow.
(Baby Mario hugs Benny as he sleeps. It then cuts back to present times)
Mario: Benny?
Benny: "laughs"
Mario: Well as much as you were a part of my childhood, not only do I need to move on, but I got to clean this place.
(Mario puts Benny back in the box and throws the boxes the attic)
Mario: "yawn" I should prolly get some sleep now. I got more time to clean my house tommorow.
(Mario then leaves the attic. He goes to his room and heads to sleep. It then cuts back to the attic. The box starts shaking. It then busts open and Benny jumps out. He slowly exits the attic and heads to the kitchen and grabs a butcher knife. It then cuts to inside Jeffy's room where Jeffy is seen playing on his cat piano)
Jeffy: (singing) I hate greenbeans I like carrots! I like carrots! I like carrots! I hate greenbeans I like carrots and my daddy's the toothfairy, tooth fairy, tooth fairy, tooth fairy! UH UH UH UH UH.
(Benny comes in holding his knife)
Jeffy: What doing with that knife?
(Benny jumps at Jeffy as he screams. It then then cuts to black. It then shows Mario still asleep. His alarm then goes off)
Cat in the Hat Alarm: My knowledge of eggs is tremendously wide! I’ve eaten them boiled! I’ve eaten them-
(Mario grabs a sledge hammer and crushes the alarm clock. He then wakes up)
Mario: "yawn" Welp, looks like I need to wake up Jeffy for school now.
(Mario heads to Jeffy's room and turns on the lights)
Mario: Alright Jeffy. Get up, its time for school.
(Jeffy doesn't wake)
Mario: Jeffy. Wake up!
(Jeffy still doesn't wake up)
Mario: Ugh.
(Mario runs up to Jeffy)
Mario: Jeffy i'm being serious! If you're late to school again, your gonna get expelled! SO WAKE UP!
(Jeffy still doesn't wake)
Mario: Oh i get it. You're trying to play sick so you won't have to go to school! Well guess what? It's not gonna work this time! Now get your lazy ass up and let's-
(Mario pulls the cover revealing Jeffy is just a decapitated head)
Mario: GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(Mario falls down in fear. He backs into the closet that opens revealing Jeffy's headless body coming out)
Mario: AGH!
(Mario looks around in shock and confusion. Benny then kicks open the door holding his knife)
Benny: It's Benny!
Mario: WHA!
(Benny jumps at Mario)
Mario: NO NO PLEASE NO-
(Benny then hugs Mario)
Mario: What the?
Benny: Tadaaaa!
Mario: Did you do this?
(Benny nods)
Mario: Huh. Well I guess I shouldn't be upset since I wished him dead alot. But I really need to get rid of this body. I got to keep this house clean for Goodman's halloween party or i'm gonna get party. What am I even supposed to do with this body?
(Benny brings out a shovel. Mario grabs it)
Mario: Guess this will do.
(Mario is seen burrying Jeffy in his backyard while Benny is seen playing with a flower. Hansel is then seen coming in)
Hansel: Hey Cheeseburger man!
Mario: Oh god not you.
(Benny grabs his knife and charges at Hansel)
Hansel: You think you can spare some cheeseballs-
(Hansel screams as Benny gouges his eyes out and stabs him multiplie times finally ending him)
Mario: BENNY WHAT THE HELL!?
Benny: Cuddle Benny!
Mario: Okay look, I can't any room for murdering anymore people, alright? I need to impress Goodman and the others! No more killing okay! Now to hide this body.
(Mario grabs Hansel's body and burrys it along with Jeffy)
Mario: Now to get back to what I was originally doing.
(Mario heads back into the house he is seen sweeping the floors when he gets a knock on the door.)
Mario: Hey Benny, can you take over sweeping while I answer the door? Thanks.
(Benny grabs the broom and sweeps. Mario walks up to the door. Rosalina is seen)
Rosalina: Hey Mario!
Mario: Oh hey Rosalina.
Rosalina: Where's Jeffy? The house sounds quiet?
Mario: Oh Jeffy he's uhhhh staying at Grandpa's. Hehe.
Rosalina: Oh! Well its great that Jeffy is spending more times with his grandparents.
Mario: Heh yeah,
Rosalina: Anywho, since Jeffy is currently out of the house, I was thinking we could spend the night with just the two of us?
Mario: Well actually i'm currently busy.
Rosalina: Oh, well thats a shame. I was hoping we could spend time in the bedroom, if you know what I mean.
(Mario stops in his tracks)
Mario: D-did I say i was busy, No No i'm all free for you baby!
Rosalina: But you just said-
Mario: Forget what I said, now just go to the bedroom and i'll meet you there.
Rosalina: "giggles" Okay then.
(Rosalina walks off. Mario runs up to Benny)
Mario: Okay Benny, you go ahead and continue cleaning the house. I got some stuff to do with Rosalina upstairs.
(Mario walks off. Benny stares at Mario while he leaves. Mario walks into his room to see Rosalina there)
Mario: So should we get this started-
(Mario turns and sees Benny holding his knife)
Mario: Uh hold on one second.
(Mario walks up to Benny)
Mario: "whispering" What are you doing!?
Benny: Benny Loves You!
Mario: "whispering" Yeah I know but I can't have you murdering another person. Especially Rosalina since she's my WIFE! Now go back to cleaning!
(Mario pushes Benny and heads back into the bedroom)
Mario: Sorry about that.
Rosalina: Who were you talking to? There better not be another girl over.
Mario: No no there's no girl now lets get down to buisness.
Rosalina: If you say so.
(Rosalina is about to kiss Mario when Mario sees Benny sneaking in with a knife. Mario pushes her away)
Mario: One second please.
(Mario walks off)
Rosalina: What the hell?!
(Mario grabs Benny and throws him into the basement and locks it)
Mario: And stay down there!
Rosalina: Mario i'm starting to think your hiding another girl!
Mario: Baby come on! Why would I hide another girl from you! You're the only girl i love!
Rosalina: Mario! You avoided doing it with me, your talking to someone and your locking someone in a room! YOUR HIDING A GIRL! STOP LYING TO ME!
Mario: Baby please, you gotta believe me!
Rosalina: WELL IF ITS NOT A GIRL, WHAT IS IT!?
(It shows Benny in the basement. He then finds a sawzall and grabs it. He heads to the door)
Mario: "sigh: Okay. If you want to know the answer so bad, here's the truth! Okay, so one of my stuffed toys came to life and killed Jeffy and Hansel! And now he's trying to kill you!
Rosalina: Oh yeah like I am supposed to believe that-
(Benny is seen sawing the door)
Rosalina: *SCREAM*
(Benny then kicks the entire door down holding his sawzall)
Benny: It's Benny!
Rosalina: YOU WE'RE TELLING THE TRUTH!
Mario: OF COURSE I WAS! NOW RUN! I'LL HOLD HIM OFF!
(Rosalina runs and Benny tries to chase after her but Mario grabs him and the two get into a fight)
Mario: LEAVE HER ALONE!
(Mario grabs a lamp and tries to hit Benny with it. Benny kicks Mario in the face knocking him down)
Mario: OW! How can a stuffed toy have such a punch!?
(Benny grabs the sawzall and continues chasing Rosalina. Chef Pee Pee then comes out of a room)
Chef Pee Pee: Whats with all the noise!? I'm trying to sleep!
(Benny stabs Chef Pee Pee in the foot)
Chef Pee Pee: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
(Mario kicks Benny and holds him to the wall)
Mario: WHY WON'T YOU QUIT IT!?
Benny: Benny... Benny.... LOVES YOU!
(Benny grabs a knife and shags his leg)
Mario: AGH!
(Mario falls down bleeding. Benny grabs the sawzall and is about to kill Mario when Chef Pee Pee kicks him sending him flying across the room)
Benny: "laughs"
(Benny gets up and snaps his fingers. Stuffed toys then come from everywhere looking at Mario menacingly)
Mario: Oh no!
(Chef Pee Pee brings out his butcher knife)
Chef Pee Pee: Go Mario! I will hold them all off!
(Mario runs as Chef Pee Pee fights the toys. Rosalina is seen running into a room. She brings out a phone)
Rosalina: Hello!? Police! Theres a stuffed toy that came to life and is trying to kill us!
(Benny runs in and slices at Rosalina)
Rosalina: GAH!
Benny: Cuddle Benny.
Rosalina: PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!
(Chives comes running in)
Chives: DON'T WORRY MASTER ROSALINA! I'M COMING TO SAVE YOU-
(Benny grabs an axe and axes Chives in the back)
Chives: I'm really bad at this.
(Chives falls down dead. Benny looks up only to see Rosalina has ran into the backyard. Benny corners her)
Rosalina: GAH!
Benny: Night Night!
(Mario breaks down the door)
Mario: HEY!
(Benny turns around and looks at Mario)
Mario: Look Benny. I'm really sorry for treating you like sh*t. Maybe we can try again and be friends maybe.
(Benny walks up to Mario)
Benny: Benny Loves You.
Mario: I loved you two Benny. 
Benny: Benny?
Mario: NOW F*CK OFF! 
(Mario presses a button to reveal an explosive underneath Benny which blows up destroying Benny )
Mario: There. 
(Rosalina runs up to Mario and hugs him)
Mario: Don't worry, Rose. It's all over.
Rosalina: Mario, I am so sorry I didn't belive you.
Mario: It's okay. It's all over now.
(Chef Pee Pee is seen coming out)
Chef Pee Pee: Hey there. Glad to see you all are safe. I was able to take care of all the stuffed animals, though it ended with a huge mess.
Mario: It's fine. We still got a few hours until Goodman arrives. What do you say we all clean the place up?
(Mario then gets a phonecall)
Mario: Hello?
Goodman: Hey Mario? Due to some problems with the staff, we decided to cancel the halloween party.
Mario: You... you did.
Goodman: Yeah, but good news! Me and the team came up with another idea for a game. "Super Mario Smell My Finger 2: Booger Boogaloo". Anyways, we'll see you at the meeting tommorow.
(Mario hangs up)
Mario: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
(It shows end credits for Benny Loves You. It zooms out revealing Endless and Izuru watched it)
Endless: Neat. 
Izuru: I just want to go to bed, I had to have a rock off with the devil to send him back to hell and to pay our rent and nearly had to go with him to be his sex slave. 
Endless: Yeah… want to watch Tenacious D The pick of Destiny. 
Izuru: Yeah no I just want to sleep. 
Endless: Me too.
(Endless shuts the TV off as the short ends)
----Crash: Well that was another spooky story from Mario.
H.U.N.T.E.R: Yeah, even though that story is non canon, i have a feeling that wont be the last we see of Benny.
Crash: Same. 
(Crash then hears the clock ringing.)
Crash: Oh my would you look at that! The clock has rung! Let the party begin!
(The town hall doors open and a bunch of people are seen walking in)
Culdee (Dressed as a bee): I'm excited for this party to finally begin!
RH (Dressed as Entity 303): Me too! You think my Entity 303 costume looks cool?
MarioFan2009 (Dressed as a robot): I think it looks sick!
RH: Thanks!
(H.U.N.T.E.R turns on the music and the party begins)
Human Meggy (Face painted as a zombie): So how is the party doing for you so far?
Beta Tari (Dressed as a squid game gaurd): Pretty great, though its hard for me to see through this mask. Guess this is what I get for sticking with the trends.
Human Meggy: True, lol!
(The music then changes to "This is Halloween")
Human Meggy: Oh my god! I love this song!
(Human Meggy runs off)
Culdee: And so the duck said, "Got any grapes"?
(Everyone is seen laughing while Donald Duck is seen listening, offended. Human Meggy then runs up and grab's Culdee's arm)
Human Meggy: Come dance with me!
Culdee: Oh i'm not a dancer!
Human Meggy: Well you are now! 
(Human Meggy pulls Culdee)
Human Meggy: Come on!
Culdee: Okay okay!
(Smoke clears as the song continues to start. Crash's silliouette is seen in the fake fog)
Crash: (singing) Boys and girls of every age Wouldn't you like to see something strange? Come with us and you will see, This, our town of Halloween! This is Halloween, this is Halloween! Pumpkins scream in the dead of night! This is Halloween, everybody make a scene! Trick or Treat till the neighbor's die of fright! That's our town! Everybody SCREAM!
Chorus: (singing) In this town of halloween!
Buckaroo (Wearing fake teeth and): I am the one hiding under your bed! Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red!
Radish (Wearing fake spiders and snakes all over his fur): I am the one hiding under your stairs! Fingers Like snakes and spiders in my hair!
Sunny (Dressed as Malleficent): (singing) This is Halloween! This is Halloween!
Frida (Dressed as a witch): (singing) Halloween Halloween! Halloween Halloween!
RH: (singing) In this town, we call home. Everyone hail to the pumpkin song.
MarioFan2009: (singing) In this town, don't we love it now? Everybody's waiting for the next surprise! Round that corner, man hiding in the trash can! Something's waiting to pounce, and how you'll SCREAM!
Crystal (Dressed as a knight): (singing) This is Halloween! Red and black, slimy green!
June (Dressed as a skeleton): (singing) Arn't you scared well thats just fine! Say it once, say it twice, take a chance and roll the dice! Rise in the moon in the dead of night!
Dave Miller (Dressed as Xenomorph): Everybody scream! Everybody scream!
Chorus: (singing) In this town of halloween!
Endless (Dressed as a scary clown): I am the clown with the tear-away face! Here in a flash and gone without a trace!
Zoe (Dressed in a ball gown): I am the "who" when you call, "Who's there?" I am the wind blowing through your hair.
Skulldozer (Dressed as in a phantom of the opera mask): I am the shadow on the moon at night Filling your dreams to the brim with fright 
Boko (Dressed as a demon): (Singing) This is Halloween! This is Halloween! 
Mouse (Dressed as an angel): (Singing) Halloween Halloween! Halloween Halloween!
Robotboy and Robotgirl (Dressed in white and black tuxedos): (Singing) Tender lumpings everywhere! Life's no fun without a good scare!
Red Yoshi (Dressed as Jekyll): That's our job...
Blue Yoshi (Dressed as Hyde): But we're not mean...
Red Yoshi and Blue Yoshi: In our town of halloween!
Izuru (Dressed as a magician): (singing) In this town! Don't we love it now, everybody's waiting for the next surprise!
Duos (Dressed as a pirate): Skeleton Jack might catch you in the back And scream like a banshee Make you jump out of your skin
Lil Fred (Dressed as a pikachu): "honking" (This is halloween! EVERYBODY SCREAM!)
Human Meggy: Won't you please make way for a very special guy?
Culdee and Human Meggy: (singing) Our man Jack is king of the pumpkin patch!
H.U.N.T.E.R: Everyone hail to the pumpkin king!
Tari (Dressed as Luigi): (singing) This is Halloween! This is halloween!
Meggy (Dressed as Mario): (singing) Halloween Halloween! Halloween Halloween!
Everyone: (singing) In this town, we call home. Everyone hail to the pumpkin song. LA LA LA! LA LA LA LA LA! LA LA LA LA LA! LA LA LA! LA LA LA! LA! LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
(The camera zooms out of the town hall)
Crash: (voice) MUAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA! HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYBODY!
== Trivia ==
* RUNNING GAG - In every mini story, Chives dies when someone axes him in the back.