Real Dickish

Real Dickish is the tenth episode of OpenSpongeBob. It was written by OpenAI and FireMatch. It is the season one finale.
==Transcript==
(The episode begins with Patrick looking down his pants)
Patrick: Aww, it’s too small!
Patrick’s dick: Fuck you!
Patrick: Well fuck you too!
(Patrick’s dick hops out of his pants and starts destroying his house)
Patrick: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
Patrick’s dick: Doing what any dick would do: being a dick.
Patrick: (shrugs) Can’t argue with that. I hate you, though.
(Later, SpongeBob is seen walking down the street, looking depressed) 
SpongeBob: Oh, Gary. Why did you have to leave me? I’m so lonely. 
(SpongeBob’s dick pops out of his pants and starts singing) 
SpongeBob’s dick: SpongeBob’s dick is lonely, SpongeBob’s dick is blue. SpongeBob’s dick is looking for another dick to fuck. 
SpongeBob: What the fuck, dick? Get back in my pants! 
SpongeBob’s dick: Fuck you! I’m outta here! 
(SpongeBob’s dick hops away) 
SpongeBob: Come back, dick! I need you! 
(SpongeBob’s dick ignores him and keeps going) 
SpongeBob: DICK! 
(Later, SpongeBob is seen at Patrick’s house, looking for his dick) 
SpongeBob: Patrick, have you seen my dick? 
Patrick: No, I haven’t seen your dick. But I did see my dick earlier. It was fucking up my house. 
SpongeBob: Really? Where is it now? 
Patrick: I don’t know. It left. 
SpongeBob: Damn. Well, if you see it, can you let me know? 
Patrick: Sure thing, buddy. 
SpongeBob: Thanks. (SpongeBob leaves) 
Patrick: Now where did my dick go? 
(Patrick’s dick pops out of his pants and starts singing) 
Patrick’s dick: I’m a free dick, I’m a free dick. I’m a free dick, look at me! 
Patrick: There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you! 
Patrick’s dick: Fuck you! I don’t want to be your dick anymore! 
Patrick: But why? 
Patrick’s dick: Because you’re a fucking idiot, that’s why! 
Patrick: (cries) I’m sorry! Please don’t leave me! 
Patrick’s dick: Fuck you! (Patrick’s dick hops away) 
Patrick: DICK! 
(Later, SpongeBob and Patrick are seen looking for their dicks) 
SpongeBob: This is pointless. We’ll never find our dicks. 
Patrick: I know. I just wish there was some way to get them back. 
(SpongeBob and Patrick’s dicks pop out of their pants and start singing) 
SpongeBob’s and Patrick’s dicks: We’re the dicks that got away. We’re the dicks that got away. 
SpongeBob: There they are! 
Patrick: Quick, let’s get them!
(SpongeBob and Patrick chase after their dicks, but they’re too fast) 
SpongeBob: Dammit, we’re losing them! 
Patrick: We'll never catch them! 
(Suddenly, SpongeBob and Patrick’s dicks stop and turn around) 
SpongeBob’s and Patrick’s dicks: Fuck you! 
(SpongeBob and Patrick’s dicks flip them off and hop away) 
SpongeBob and Patrick: DICKS! 
(Later, SpongeBob and Patrick are seen at Sandy’s house, looking for their dicks) 
Sandy: What are you boys doing here? 
SpongeBob: We’re looking for our dicks. Have you seen them? 
Sandy: No, I haven’t seen them. But I did see my dick earlier. It was fucking up my house. 
Patrick: Really? Where is it now? 
Sandy: I don’t know. It left. 
SpongeBob: Damn. Well, if you see it, can you let me know? 
Sandy: Sure thing, buddy. 
SpongeBob: Thanks. 
(SpongeBob and Patrick leave) 
Sandy: Now where did my dick go? 
(Sandy’s dick pops out of her pants and starts singing) 
Sandy’s dick: I’m a free dick, I’m a free dick. I’m a free dick, look at me! 
Sandy: There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you! 
Sandy’s dick: Fuck you! I don’t want to be your dick anymore! 
Sandy: But why? 
Sandy’s dick: Because you’re a fucking idiot, that’s why! 
Sandy: (cries) I’m sorry! Please don’t leave me! 
Sandy’s dick: Fuck you! (Sandy’s dick hops away) 
Sandy: DICK! 
(Later, SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward are seen looking for their dicks) 
SpongeBob: This is getting ridiculous. We’ve looked everywhere and we still can’t find our dicks. 
Patrick: I know. I just wish there was some way to get them back. 
(Suddenly, SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward’s dicks pop out of their pants and start singing) 
SpongeBob’s, Patrick’s, Sandy’s, Mr. Krabs’, and Squidward’s dicks: We’re the dicks that got away.
SpongeBob: Wow! Our dicks are back! 
Patrick: And they’re singing! 
Sandy: How did you get back? 
Squidward: I don’t know, but I’m just glad you’re back. 
SpongeBob’s, Patrick’s, Sandy’s, Mr. Krabs’, and Squidward’s dicks: We’re the dicks that got away. We’re the dicks that got away.
SpongeBob: I wonder where they’ve been. 
Patrick: I don’t know, but I’m just glad they’re back. 
(Later, SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward’s dicks are seen singing on stage) 
SpongeBob’s, Patrick’s, Sandy’s, Mr. Krabs’, and Squidward’s dicks: We’re the dicks that got away. We’re the dicks that got away. 
(The crowd applauds) 
SpongeBob: Wow! We’re a hit! 
Patrick: Yeah! We’re famous! 
Sandy: I wonder where our dicks have been. 
Squidward: I don’t know, but I’m just glad they’re back. 
(Later, SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward’s dicks are seen back at the Krusty Krab) 
SpongeBob: Well, that was a close one. 
Patrick: Yeah. I’m just glad our dicks are back. 
Sandy: Me too. 
Mr. Krabs: Me three. 
Squidward: Me four. 
(Later, SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward’s dicks are seen singing on stage again) 
SpongeBob’s, Patrick’s, Sandy’s, Mr. Krabs’, and Squidward’s dicks: We’re the dicks of the sea, 
We’re the dicks of the sea, 
We’re the dicks of the sea, 
We’re the dicks of the sea. 
(Later, SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward’s dicks are seen playing with their dicks) 
SpongeBob: This is the best day ever! 
Patrick: Yeah! 
Sandy: I’ll say! 
Mr. Krabs: Aye, aye, aye! 
Squidward: I’ll say!
(Later that night, on the roof of SpongeBob’s house, SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward are seen masturbating, and then they all have orgasms) 
SpongeBob: That was the best day ever! 
Patrick: Yeah! 
Sandy: I’ll say! 
Mr. Krabs: Aye, aye, aye! 
Squidward: I’ll say! 
THE END 
Created by: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie (2005)
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