Wizard 25

Chapter 25
Richard is making clay roofing tiles. He knows how to do this because...all woods guides learn how to make clay roofing tiles? This could have been explained with a sentence or two, but it's not, so we have no idea where Richard picked up this skill. We do learn that neither he nor Kahlan know how to thatch roofs, confirming my theory that thatched roofs would totally work better than grass.
Richard also reinforces the underside of the roof on his test hut, since clay tiles are heavier than grass. He apparently knows carpentry as well. A regular Renaissance man, our Richard.
Kahlan angsts to herself about how the Mud People, although polite, are scared of her. Then she angsts about how Richard killed Clown Shoe Man to save her, but she was never in any real danger. She could have used her Magical Mystery Power before which No Man Can Stand, but she...didn't for some reason. Instead, she stood like a stump while Clown Shoe Man swung a sword at her and Richard risked his life to save hers in excruciating slow-mo.
Kahlan's mother died of some disease, and she was adopted by another woman. We get a flashback to Kahlan finding her adopted sister, Dennee, who has been raped and tortured by a quad. While this is a terrible thing, I remind you that the quads are supposed to be deadly ASSASSINS. And they left Dennee ALIVE. Yes, they tormented her, and yes, she died soon afterward, but THEY LEFT HER ALIVE. She was alive enough to have an emotional farewell with Kahlan, who adjusted her dress and gave her her bone necklace and had a conversation. \~/
Worst assassins ever.
Oh, and we also learn that Dennee sometimes took days to recover the use of her Magical Mystery Power, whereas Kahlan is strong and can recover it in a matter of hours. Good to know.
Kahlan and the Bird Man of Alcatraz chat for a while, and we learn something about Kahlan's morals:
“If I knew I could somehow stop Rahl by killing Savidlin's precious little boy, I would do it without hesitation, with my bare hands if need be, because as much as it would wound my heart, I know I would be saving all the other precious little children. It is a terrifying burden I carry, the burden of the warrior.”
This is quite disturbing. Kahlan has just admitted that she would unhesitatingly murder an innocent child in order to accomplish her goal of stopping Rahl. Not an adult, who might be expected to understand an accept his fate. Not allow someone to die, because it's impossible to save everyone. Murder. A. Child. \~/
And then she caps it off with some self-pity about her terrifying burden. Nice.
Kahlan angsts some more, and then we get a lovely domestic scene at Savidlin's house, with his wife and child and Richard and Kahlan. Kahlan thinks about how she told the Bird Man of Alcatraz that she would be willing to kill Savidlin's child. She feels sad about it, but it's still true: she would still kill a child. And it's still deeply disturbing. Kahlan is supposed to be one of the heroes, right? Really?
The next day, Richard's magical clay roof is done. It doesn't leak, and it lets the smoke out so it doesn't collect in the room. How hard is it to let smoke out? You poke a hole in the roof and build the fire under it. The Plains tribes left the tips of their tipis open and that drew the smoke just fine. Nevertheless, this is treated as a fantastic innovation by the Racist Stereotype People.
“Cries of excitement and wonder rose from the people...They peeked in the doorway to see the fire burning without filling the room with smoke. The idea of living without smoke in their eyes seemed as thrilling as living without water dripping on their heads.”
Once again, the Damp Ground People are idiots. They can build brick houses, but they can't make a roof that doesn't leak or a smoke-hole that works. They are being made into idiots so Richard can appear brilliant and awesome with his White Man's Magic. \~/
The six village elders call Richard on this, basically saying that he only taught them how to make a clay roof to get them to name him a Wet Dirt Person and call a council of the seers for him...which is totally true. That is literally the only reason Richard did what he did.
The Bird Man of Alcatraz has “heavy brown eyes.” How can you have heavy eyes? Are they unusually large? Is he an anime character?
Anyway, Richard suggests the elders murder all their women and children, because that will be more merciful than what Darken Rahl would do. Again with the killing of children. Richard and Kahlan angst as they pack up.
They discover that the night stone is missing. This is cause for alarm, because Richard has decided that the night stone can wake the dead.
I'm sorry; WHAT?
Richard's reasoning is that Adie was nervous when she gave the stone to him (which, if it happened, wasn't mentioned...she glanced out the window once, and that was it). Also, the shadows in the pass started to come after them once Richard took the stone out. Which couldn't possibly have been because it was glowing, now could it? \~/ Of course not. The stone being able to WAKE THE DEAD is the only possible explanation. Surely. It all makes perfect sense.
Richard wonders why Adie didn't warn him, and Kahlan says that, yes she did, she warned us with a sorceress's riddle. Which is still not true. \~/ Unless a “sorceress's riddle” bears no resemblance to a normal riddle.
They decide that Siddin, the child Kahlan talked about callously murdering, has stolen it, and that ends the chapter.
Drinks: 5
<Intermission  -  Next Chapter>