The Mad Tea Party (Minnie Mouse version)

After walking through the woods, Minnie had finally found a house which she believes could be the Cat Hatter and the March Penguin's house.
"How very curious!" Minnie cried.
She walked to the gate that was the side of the house to see who could be singing. She saw that there was a long table, with a pink tablecloth and many and many teapots and cups and many more things. Sitting around the table were two animals that seem happy.
They were Danny (an orange tomcat with peach around his bottom and hands, feet, and partially his face. He wears a hat, a white button up shirt, a dark green vest, and green pants.) and Pudge (a penguin with black feathers, white feathers around his face and stomach, a yellow beak, and webbed feet. He wears a dark red hat and brown shirt.), and right now, they were singing a song, while steam was coming out of the teapots, playing along with the song.
Pudge: ...to us.
A very know what day today is tea forget of us?
Danny: A very merry unbirthday...
Pudge: A very merry unbirthday...
Danny and Pudge: A very merry unbirthday to uuuuuussss...
As a solo was taking place, Minnie looked from behind the chair and saw the teapots dancing around. She tried to look at the guests of the party, but the steam was in the way. So she looked down through the teapots.
Pudge: Aaaaa... very Merry Unbirthday to me.
Danny: To who?
Pudge: To me!
Danny: Oh you!
Pudge: A very merry unbirthday to you.
Danny: Who me?
Pudge: Yes you!
Danny: Oh me!
Pudge: Let's all congratulate us
With another cup of tea.
A very merry unbirthday...
Toooooooooooooooooooooooo... Yooooooouuuuuuuu...
When the song was over, Minnie applauded. Danny and Pudge noticed that Minnie was there. They sprang from their chairs and jumped from chair to chair over to her, saying, "No room, no room, no room!"
Minnie sat down on a chair in confusion and protested, "But I thought there was plenty of room."
"Ah, but it's very rude to sit down without being invited!" Pudge said.
Danny said in agreement, "I say it's rude! It's very, very rude indeed. Hah!"
A brown circus mouse named Timothy Q. Mouse, who was wearing a red/gold ringmaster's outfit with a matching hat with a white feather, peeked out of a teapot and repeated in a sleepy voice, "Very, very, very rude indeed..."
Minnie figures that they had a point, so she apologized, saying, "Oh, I'm sorry, but I did enjoy your singing and I wondered if you could tell me..."
Pudge jumped on the chair Minnie was sitting on said, "You enjoyed our singing?"
"Oh, what a delightful child!" Danny said. "Hah! I'm so excited, we never get compliments! You must have a cup of tea."
"Ah, yes indeed!" Pudge agreed. "You must have a cup of tea!"
"That would be very nice. And I'm sorry that I interrupted your birthday party." Minnie said, as Pudge gave her the tea. "Thank you."
Pudge then grabbed the tea back and said, "Birthday? Ha, ha, ha! My dear child, this is not a birthday party."
Then Danny picked up a teapot and poured tea, as he said, "Of course not. He-he-he. This is an unbirthday party."
"Unbirthday?" Minnie said in confusion. "Why, I'm sorry, but I don't quite understand."
"It's very simple," Pudge explained. "See, thirty days have Sept-no, when..." Pudge scratched his head. "An unbirthday, if you have a birthday, then you..." Then he laughed how hard it is to explain. "She doesn't know what an unbirthday is!" 
Danny replied, "How silly... Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha... Ah-hum..." He coughed a little and used a tea pot to spray some steam to clear his throat. "I shall elucidate!"
Pudge used a spoon as a baton to conduct the tea pots into music.
Danny: Now statistics pove, prove that you've one birthday.
Pudge: Imagine, just one birthday every year.
Danny: Ahhh, but there are over 364 unbirthdays.
Pudge: Precisely, why we're gathered her to cheer!
And since today wasn't Minnie's birthday, Minnie got up and said, "Well, then today is my unbirthday too."
"It is?" said Pudge, looking surprised.
"What a small world this is." Danny commented.
"In that case..." Pudge said, before he and Danny jumped out of their seats and started to dance around Minnie.
Pudge: A very merry unbirthday.
Minnie: To me?
Danny: To you.
He takes off his hat to present a big pink cake trim in white with a burning candle on top.
Pudge: A very merry unbirthday.
Minnie: For me?
Danny: For you.
Danny gives Minnie the cake.
Now blow out the candle out, my dear,
And make your wish come true!
He picks some icing up with his finger and licked it off, with a laugh.
Minnie blew the candle out and it started to flare like a fuse. In fact, to Minnie's surprise, the cake launched to the sky like a skyrocket.
Danny and Pudge: A very merry unbirthday to you...
The cake exploded with many pretty colors like fireworks, much to Minnie's delight. Out of the smoke, descended Timothy with a tiny umbrella tied on him.
Timothy: Twinkle, twinkle little bat
How I wonder what your at
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky...
Timothy landed in a tea pot and Pudge closed the pot.
Minnie clapped and said, "Oh, that was lovely!"
Danny dipped his saucer in a teacup and said, "And us, now my dear, he-he, uh... you were saying that you would like to sit, uh...? Pardon me."
He then took a bite of the saucer. And he continued. "You were seeking some information of some kind...he-he!"
Pudge gave Minnie a cup of tea, as Minnie accepted it and said, "Oh yes. You see, I'm looking for a..."
Danny then called out, "Clean cup, clean cup! Move down, move down, move down!" as he threw his cups in the air as did Pudge.
Pudge grabbed Minnie by the hand and made her stand up and follow.
Minnie said in confusion, "But I haven't used my cup!"
Pudge: Clean cup, clean cup...
Move down, move down...
Clean cup, clean cup...
Move down...
Danny picked up a teapot with three spouts on each level of the height.
As he poured tea in three cups, he asked Minnie, "Would you like a little more tea?"
Minnie tried to get some tea out of a teapot that has no spout, as she explains, "Well, I haven't had any yet, so I can't very well take more..."
Pudge took the teapot, cracked the teapot, and poured in Minnie's cup.
"Ahhh, you mean you can't very well take less!" Pudge corrected her.
Danny scooped a spoon full of sugar and poured it into Minnie's cup, then poured all the whole sugar pot in the cup, too much, in fact, that it overflowed.
"Yes! You can always take more than nothing!" Danny agreed.
Minnie took the cup and said, "But I only meant that..."
She was about to sip it, but the sugar was not allowing her to.
Danny held four cups of full tea, and tossed a teapot after filling the fourth one on top.
"And now, my dear, something seems to be troubling you," he said, as he took a sip of the teacup at the bottom. "Uh, won't you tell us all about it?"
"Start at the beginning." Pudge said.
"Yes, yes," Danny agreed. "And when you come to the end, heh, heh, heh, heh, stop! See?"
"Well, it all started when I was sitting on the riverbamk with Figaro," Minnie began.
"Very interesting," Pudge said, as he drank some tea, but then slammed the tea down quick with an excited expression. "Who's Figaro?"
"Well, Figaro is my cat," Minnie explained. "You see..."
Right when Minnie said 'cat', Timothy poked his head out of the teacup, as he shouted, "Cat?" and then started to go nuts in panic and started to run around the table.
"Cat! Cat! Cat.." Timothy was crying as everybody except Minnie went after Timothy to calm him down. Danny and Pudge jumped and grabbed Timothy by the tail.
Pudge then said, "Hurry! Give the jam! Quickly! Give the jam!"
Minnie didn't need a second invite and went for the jam.
"On his nose, on his nose!" Danny instructed her, as Minnie scooped some jam up with a knife and smothered it on Timothy's nose, making him calm down, even as he said, "Where's the cat..."
Danny sighed in relief and said, "Oh. Oh, my goodness! Those are the things that upset me!" 
Pudge poured some tea and stops the pouring by plugging the flow with his tail, as he said, "See all the trouble you've started?"
Minnie received the cup and said, "But, really, I didn't think..."
"Ah, but that's the point," Pudge said. "If you don't think, you shouldn't talk!"
Minnie was about to drink her tea, when Danny shouted, "Clean cup, clean cup! Move down, move down, move down!"
"But I still haven't used..." Minnie began to protest, they moved down.
Pudge: Move down, move down, move down...
"And now, my dear, as you were saying?" Danny asked.
"Oh, yes," Minnie said. "I was sitting on the riverbank with uh..." She whispered into Danny's ear, "With you-know-who."
Danny said in excitement, "I do? Heh, heh, heh, heh..."
"I mean my C...A...T..."
Danny then pulled out a teapot and said, "Tea?"
Pudge then cut a cup in half with a knife and said, "Just half a cup, if you don't mind." Danny poured Pudge some tea into the half cup.
"Come, come my dear," Danny said, with a laugh. "Don't you care for tea?"
"Why, yes," Minnie began, "I'm very fond of tea, but..."
"If you don't care for tea, you could at least make polite conversation!" Pudge said.
"Well, I've been trying to ask you..." Minnie began.
"I have an excellent idea," Pudge said. "Let's change the subject!"
He then bonked Danny's hat onto his head with a mallet.
Danny popped the top of his half off and asked, "Why is a raven like a writing desk?"
Minnie then said in confusion, "Riddles? Let me see now. Why is a raven like a writing desk?"
Danny then said, "I beg your pardon?"
"Poe writes on both!" Minnie answered.
Danny then said in panic, "Poe writes on what?"
Pudge jumped on Danny and said, "Careful! She's stark raving mad!"
Minnie got up and said, "But-but it's your silly riddle! You just said..."
Danny and Pudge backed away from Minnie.
"Very good?" asked Minnie, as he tried to use a chair to defend himself.
Pudge nervously held out a cup of tea, saying, "How about a nice cup of tea?"
Minnie then yelled in frustration, "Have a cup of tea, indeed! Well, I'm sorry, but I just haven't the time!"
Pudge then shouted, "The time! The time! Who's got the time?"
Then, Kaa came in, saying in panic, "No, no, no, no! No time, no time, no time! Hello, good-bye! I'm late! I'm late!"
Minnie was surprised that the snake actually came to this mad tea party, as Minnie said, "The Indian python!"
Kaa took out his watch and said, "Oh, I'm so late! I'm so very, very late!"
Then, Danny yanked the watch out of the snake's pocket, also, yanking the snake's neck.
"Well, no wonder you're late," Danny said, as he examined the watch. "Why, this clock is exactly two days slow!"
"Two days slow?" asked Kaa.
"Of course you're late!" Danny said, as he dipped the watch in a teapot then slammed it on the table, removing the face of the watch and laughed, as he said, "My goodness. We'll have to look into this." Danny placed a saltshaker in his eye and looked down at the watch, making salt pour all over the watch. "Aha!" Danny said. "I see what's wrong with it! Why, this watch is full of wheels!"
He then started digging out all the gears and springs with a fork. The snake couldn't believe what was happening. As if his house being burnt wasn't bad enough.
"Oh, my poor watch! Oh, my wheels! My springs!" Kaa yelled, as he grabbed some springs and wheels as one spring got caught on his nose, before he stuttered, "But-but-but-but, but-but-but..."
"Butter," Danny said. "Of course, we need some butter! Butter!"
"Butter!" Pudge yelled into Kaa's ear.
"But-But-Butter?" Kaa said, as he spotted a tray of butter and picked it up.
Danny took the butter from the snake and said, "Butter, oh, thank you, butter. Ha-ha. Yes, that's fine."
He then started to spread butter all over the clock's face.
Kaa then yelled in panic, "Oh-no-no, no-no-no, you'll get crumbs in it!"
"Oh, this is the very best butter," Danny said, as he slammed the butter in the snake's face. "What are you talking about?" 
Pudge then said, "Tea?"
"Tea!" Danny said, as he poured tea on the watch. "Oh, I never thought of tea! Of course!"
"No!" Kaa said, as Danny said, "Tea," and laughed, as the snake said, "No! Not tea!"
Pudge blocked the snake's way with his foot and said, "Sugar?"
Danny replied, "Sugar. Two spoons, yes, ha, two spoons. Thank you, yes."
He took two spoons and slammed them on the watch.
"Oh, please! Be careful!" Kaa said.
"Jam?" Pudge asked, as he handed the jam to the snake.
Danny took the jam from Kaa and said, "Jam, I forgot all about jam!"
He poured the jam on the watch and spread it around.
"No, no!" Kaa said. "Not jam!"
"Yes, sure you want," Danny said, "it's nice to see."
"Mustard?" asked Pudge, as he balanced a jar of mustard on his foot.
"Mustard? Yes, but..." Danny began, before he stopped and said, "Mustard? Don't let be silly!" He tossed the mustard, took a lemon, and poured it into the clock, as he said, "Lemon, that's different, that's..." Then he closed the watch and used a butter knife to slice off the jam, as he said, "There. That should do it."
Then, the watch started to go haywire and jump around.
"Look at that!" Danny exclaimed.
"It's going mad!" Pudge said.
"Oh, my goodness!" Minnie said, looking worried.
"Oh dear!" Kaa said.
"It's going mad!" Pudge said, as the clock jumped about. "Mad watch!"
"I don't understand," Danny said, "it's the best butter."
"Mad watch! Mad watch! Mad watch!" Pudge shouted.
"Oh, look!" Danny exclaimed, as it went crazy. "Oh, my goodness!"
Pudge lifted his hammer and said, "There's only one way to stop a mad watch!" He slammed the watch, destroying it completely. Now, it's nothing but a small pile of junk.
Danny stared at it, before he said, nonchalantly, as he passed the watch to Kaa, "Two days slow, that's what it is."
"Oh, my watch..." Kaa said, getting all teary-eyed.
"It was?" asked Danny.
"And it was my unbirthday present too..." added.
"Well, in that case..." Danny said, as he and Pudge grabbed the snake and prepared to throw him out of the garden.
Danny and Pudge: A very Merry Unbirthday
Tooooooooooooooooooooooooooo... you.
Danny and Pudge tossed Kaa out of the garden and waved goodbye to him as Minnie tried to catch up to the snake.
"Mister Snake!" Minnie yelled, as she ran out of the party. "Oh, Mister Snake! Oh, now where did he go to?"
Then, she heard the tea party song again.
She turned and glared at Danny and Pudge, before she stormed off and Minnie muttered, "Of all the silly nonsense, this is the stupidest tea party I've ever been to in all my life."
Category:Fan Fiction
Category:Alice in Wonderland Movie Spoofs
Category:Alice in Wonderland Movies
Category:Alice in Wonderland Movies Spoof