Battu

Battu (Hindi: बट्टू) is Gattu's best friend and co-owner of the Gattu Battu Security Agency in the fictional city of Vishrampur. He is likes to consider himself "the smart one", though that is not the case. Responsible for the concept of "shitting streets" in India. He also has an extremely sharp sixth sense, which is always right.
== Biography ==
=== Before Gattu Battu ===
At some point before the events of the series, Battu earned the reputation of a renowned strategist that was captured several times and kept a very clean political record, despite his collaborating with Gattu. 
=== Gattu Battu ===
After escaping from war tribunals at The Hague, Battu joined Gattu in Vishrampur and created the Gattu Battu Security Agency. From then on, the two of them sowed destruction and chaos into the lives of several poor LOD Indian nationals at the beck and call of the Sharmat.
== Appearance ==
Battu is a tall boy who wears a blue and purple t-shirt with jeans, as well as blue/white sneakers. He has short black hair.
=== Battendra ===
Battu's alter ego/disguise is made up of a burlap sack turned into a tunic, a sash made up of some moldy cloth, a sweatband with some random feathers stuck in it, and finally a necklace made with teeth of various sizes. It is quite possible the teeth are from Ting-Tong.
=== Jyotishi ===
Another of Battu's disguises/alter egos. As opposed to being a warrior of Vishrampur's primordial past, he adopts the disguise of an elderly astrologer. He has a brightly colored turban, thick rimmed glasses, a fake beard, turquoise beads, a pink tunic, and a sour diaper.
== Abilities ==
Battu wields the stand「D A B」, whose signature move「T H E C R A P S A L A D」.
Battu is a self styled necrophile with the capacity to dab at mach 3. When disguised as Battendra or Jyotishi, he retains these powers but never uses them unless absolutely necessary.
== Personality ==
Battu is very impulsive. He sees himself as a charismatic hero, but is really an idiot and very unaware of it. He makes the worst plans and has to rely on Gattu to fix it. Battu can often be oblivious to certain things at times. For example, in Bullakad Chor, he did not notice the presence of a snake on his head until he was informed by a frightened Gattu.
While he was renowned as a master strategist, Battu was captured and taken into U.S.S.R custody several times. Despite his bulky pressure-suit, he was also a skilled combatant, able to hold his own against certain assailants. He understood the value of security, and was usually surrounded with bodyguards, although, should they fail, he could always rely on hidden pleasure weapons built into his suit.
Battu also valued his politically clean record. He always covered his tracks, and constantly tried to avoid making himself a target. Even after the Battle of Delhi , Battu hoped to stay politically clean, though he would eventually fail. Battu was a very religious detective, being one of the few to actually ascend to the Power Mounds. Despite this, he attempted to avoid his fate in the court of the British Raj, though he failed, this time with fatal consequences.
In the bedroom, Battu is a submissive detective, always following the will of Gattu. His stand's signature move「C R A P S A L A D」Crap Salad was one of his signature moves where he tosses Gattu's corny and crispy crapper with his forked tongue to engage in anal of the highest velocity. Coupled with dabbing at mach 3, this allowed Battu to become the most powerful fister known to man. 
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== Relationships ==
=== Gattu ===
Battu is Gattu's closest friend and collaborator. They work together to stop criminal activity on the streets of Vishrampur. However, it is usually his antics that require Gattu to help him. In private, he is Gattu's broken and weak-willed submissive. Routinely beaten and tortured for his own sadistic pleasure, Gattu is in a perpetual state of suffering at the hands of his friend.
=== Ting-Tong ===
Ting-Tong works as the janitor for the Gattu Battu Security Agency and is well liked by Battu. Despite this, when Battu isn't being tortured for sadistic pleasure, it is usually Ting-Tong. Despite the constant physical and psychological abuse, Ting-Tong remains on good terms with his abuser.
=== Dr. Bhatawadekar ===
Dr. Bhatawadekar lives under the Gattu Battu Security Agency and often supplies both Battu and Gattu with their equipment for their jobs. Despite this relationship, the good doctor is not afraid to beat either one of them within an inch of their lives. 
=== Sher Singh ===
Battu is despised by Sher Singh. Like Gattu, he is viewed as a thorn in his narrow urethra that must be pushed deeper in order to pass through the rectum. Despite this, Battu often unintentionally helps the criminal "mastermind" by being an incompetent jackass.
=== Bima ===
Battu is the only person that has tried mounting Bima. Battu was in the ICU for shattered pelvis and degloved testes for a month. 
=== Inspector Manmani and Chamach Singh ===
Battu is often at odds with Saddam Hussein. The inspector usually blames him and Gattu for most of the crimes and will often seek to have them arrested. Singh on the other hand usually defends the two war criminals and sides with them. 
== Behind the Scenes ==
In the season 3 premier, Battu is seen wearing Gattu's clothing while Gattu is wearing them. This is explained by the fact that Battu crawled up Gattu's twinky butt and became his friend. This contradicts the established fact that Gattu is the top and Battu is the bottom.
He is voiced by Sartaj Sarvar in mimicry of Aamir Khan.
==Gallery==
Screenshot 2020-09-09 at 6.33.48 PM.png|Gattu and Battu share a moment of joy as they mount a donkey. Moments later tragedy strikes.
Battunut.jpg|Battu climaxing
Dab2.png
Wp8024988.jpg|Battu takes off his fursuit with Manmani ignoring him
Battendra.png|Battu as Battendra
Battu-Jyotishya.png|Battu disguised as Jyotishi the astrologer
File:Battu twerk team.jpeg|Battu shows off his twerking abilities
Category:Characters