Cabin Fever/Transcript

==Scene 1==
(A school bus pulls up to Camp 98.7.)
Ronathon: Whoa, easy! (The bus stops.) Good girl.
(The students inside exit the bus.)
Sam: Do you ever wonder why- (He gets shoved to the ground by Emily, who was pushed by another student.)
Emily: Hey! (She picks her book up and leaves as more students exit the bus.)
Thad: No kidding! (He and Lizzy share a laugh as they exit the bus.)
(Uzi is the last one to exit. She looks down at 2 collars she wears on her right hand as we get a flashback.)
Khan: After the core collapsed... I... didn't notice the collars. (Khan is looking at an old photo of him and Nori, along with a group of friends.) Only your mom being a catch!
(No response from Uzi, who is staring into a room filled with old papers and storage stuff.)
Khan: (Sighs) She was always all, "Build doors against the coming sky demons!" "The singularity awakens." "Look at this cool S I can draw!" (Sighs) Turns out, I'm not who either of you needed. (He closes the door.) Just... Be safe, okay?
(He hands Uzi the collars as the flashback ends. Uzi puts one collar in her pocket, and the other goes around her neck.)
Braidon: Uh, teacher, what is this field trip?
Teacher: Yeah, Uzi's idea. Ask her.
Braidon: (Scoffs) Who?
Uzi: I've sat next to you for years.
(Uzi's speaking startles everyone.)
Uzi: Bite me! I asked to go alone. He's mad at your test scores.
Teacher: No year-end bonus, no learning.
Braidon: So, we're just unsupervised? (CRASH!) What the-!?
(At that moment, V and N come crashing down in front of them. N turns to them menacingly, looking like he is ready to kill them and ingest their warm, sweet oil, until suddenly...)
N: Welcome, campers! Let's sound off! (He gets ready to do roll call, but instead begins to count.) One, two... (He stops. A student gets shot at by V and falls over, dead.)
Students: (In sync, and not wanting to get shot at as well) THREE/FOUR/FIVE/SIX/SEVEN/EIGHT/NINE/TEN/ELEVEN!
N: That's everyone! (Whispers to V) Minus one... (To the students) We got so many distracting activities planned, so no sneaking off to investigate stuff! (He slyly gestures to Uzi, who blushes.) To the bunks!
(He leads the way... Except no one's following him. He looks over at Uzi, then back to the students.)
Thad: Sounds good, N
(Lizzy loots items from the dead worker drone, including a gold watch.)
Lizzy: Anything for my bestie!
(Thad and Lizzy join N and V, but no one else does.)
Uzi: (still blushing) Y-Yeah, they're like my friends, too, so... It's cool.
(Everyone flees in a panic at Uzi's mere presence.)
Emily: (Taking N's hand) You can be our friend, little guy!
Darren: (Poking V's eye) Poor thing's defective. (V grabs Darren's hand menacingly, then looks back at Uzi.)
V: Hmph. Nah, just full of love. (Her tail turns into the outline of a heart, and then gestures to N. ) This one's a pilot.
Rebecca: Oh! (Giggles) Wow, a pilot.
(N looks back at Uzi, who gestures that she will go her own way and that N should get everyone else to the campsite. She gives a thumbs up, N nods, and Uzi heads into the woods, alone.)
==Scene 2==
(Uzi continues her trek through the woods until she reaches an abandoned building. She uses her powers to open the lock (Which almost crushes a bug) and ventures inside. She picks up a hat, then tosses it to the side as she examines her surroundings: Books and bottles clutter the floor, two Worker uniforms are hanging up, furniture is laying on their sides, and a wall has been blasted open. A calendar on the wall catches her eye and she moves it over towards her. It shows a dog on the top half, and the bottom half shows the month of Seramorris. An important note reads, "EVACUATE ALL DOGS! Just in case something bad happens, idk." Two additional notes underneath read, "Cool, we did that. That's canon." and "ALSO, ALL DOGS ARE IMMORTAL NOW! THANKS TO SCIENCE!" Uzi sighs in relief. Suddenly, a noise grabs her attention. She looks around, and gets spooked when she spots what appears to be a human hand reach from around a corner. She tries to steady her flashlight when she hears a scream coming from outside. She heads to the window and finds...! the other campers rowing their canoes on the lake, screaming and laughing in joy.)
Rebecca: (To N) So, my friend want to know if you'd kill her family. And if you're single.
Darren: (As he and Thad carry a canoe with V and Lizzy in it.) Make way for the canoe train!
V: Sabotage, minions! Plan X! (The boys kick N's canoe and head off while laughing, only to slip and drop the canoe. Lizzy falls out and V simply flies in the air. Emily falls out of N's canoe.)
Rebecca: I CAN'T SWIM! (She almost falls out, but N catches her.) Oh! Hehe... Thank you.
(N salutes)
N: Close one.
(Back at the abandoned building, as Uzi watches the campers rowing their canoes, the AbsoluteSolver symbol suddenly appears on her right eye, and the window shatters. As she tries to reach inside her backpack, suddenly the AbsoluteSolver glitches out and displays a caution symbol with "HIGH TEMP" displayed on her right eye. The camera cuts to a view inside Uzi's backpack, which contains a severed worker drone hand.)
V: Tick tock... (She giggles as she makes her presence known.)
Uzi: H-Hey, s-stupid... idiot... Uh, weren't you just-
V: You said this camp would help us catch that red-eyed Doll freak. How about more "explore-y", less "watch from window creepy".
Uzi: (Swipes her hand away) Working on it. Just... (Sarcastically) so glad you guys fit right in. Super cool. (V raises her tail behind Uzi.)
V: Better to stay distant, though. Don'tcha think? (She looks over at Uzi's backpack.) Since I'll have to kill you next? (She scratches a line across Uzi's eye with her knife finger and prepares to leave.) N's made friends with rocks, by the way. He'll move on just fine.
(She makes her exit as Uzi's eye repairs itself. She sighs as she goes over to get her backpack, only to see that it had crushed a bug.)
Uzi: Sorry, buddy. Gotcha good. (She uses her AbsoluteSolver powers to repair the bug back to good health. The little insect wanders away and turns back to Uzi, who salutes it as it heads under the floorboards. Uzi uses her powers to lift the wood up, revealing a rotting, deceased Worker Drone. She lifts up a few papers: Two drawings, and a JCJenson Program Admission Notice, both covered in oil. She flips over the last one to reveal a part of a Murder Drone's claw pierced through the side that was otherwise supposed to be intentionally left blank. She pulls the claw piece out as another bug climbs onto her hand. She squishes it, but it narrowly dodges and climbs her other hand.)
Insect: >:( (It scans her.) WELCOME BACK [002]. HOW CAN I HELP YOU TODAY?
-SUBMIT TIME CARD-PTO REQUEST-REGISTER TORTURE CHAMBER COMPLAINT-END MY SUFFERING (PROMO OFFER DISCONTINUED)-CALL ELEVATOR
Uzi: ...Elevator?
-Elevator?
Insect: PLEASE PLACE ME ON PROXIMITY READER (CABIN FEVER LABS).
Uzi: Where's that? What are you?
-Wear his hat?-What argue?
Insect: INVALID RESPONSE.
(Unbeknownst to Uzi, Doll appears and disappears behind her back...)
==Scene 3==
(Back with the campers. N fires multiple arrows at a target's center until it catches fire.)
N: Ah, sorry! Did I... cheat? (He looks back at the others. No answer, but another camper gets shot at and falls over. V jumps down.)
V: Tch. You didn't even kill everyone here. Check this out. (She gets ready to fire an arrow at... The campers, who nervously clap.)
(Meanwhile, Uzi is making her way back to the campsite.)
Uzi: (Whispering to get N's attention) Psst. Hey.
(N looks behind him. He sees Uzi, with her new bug friend.)
Insect: HELLO :) DON'T TELL V I'M HERE
N: (Yelling, thus indirectly letting V know she's here) Uzi, get on out here! (Insect: :0) This troop's a team! (Realizing he has gotten V's attention) WAIT, NO, INCLUSIVE REFLEXES!
(V looks back)
Insect: D:!! (It flees.)
Uzi: Uh, hehe, hey, everyone.
(Everyone screams at her presence. Braidon accidentally shoots an arrow in her direction. However, she uses her powers to stop it... Only for her temperature to rise again and morph the arrow into a fleshy, bloody mess.)
Uzi: (Nervously freaked out) Um, ignore all this! Uh... I was just... Going... (Oil shoots out from the student's corpse like a fountain.) Yeah, I LIVE IN THE WOODS NOW! (She retreats back into the woods.)
Braidon: ...Who was that?
==Scene 4==
(Uzi retreats into a nearby cabin and barricades the door. She uses her powers to force all the doors and windows shut so that no one will find her. She reaches into her backpack and tries to grab the worker drone arm to eat, only for a nearby clock's ticking to drive her crazy, to the point where she has to use her powers to destroy the clock and the lights. Except for one. Uzi attempts to destroy it, but everything around her turns red as a fleshy abomination manifests and covers her entire vision...)
(Meanwhile, N is trying to prevent V from attempting to harm Uzi.)
N: V, we can't hurt Uzi!
V: We do our jobs, and that thing leaves us-
N: I don't know what you're talking about because you won't tell me! (He frees himself from V's grasp using his claw.) What're you so afraid of!?
V: I'm not afraid...!
N: I am! Uzi is! She's a kid, like us, V! What is WRONG with you!?
(No response. N sighs and tosses his clipboard at her.)
N: Look after the campers. (He flies off in pursuit of Uzi.)
Lizzy: Hot. (V is unamused.) Not hot? You're too good for him.
(V turns to the other campers.)
V: Do whatever you want. (She stomps off. Rebecca gestures to Darren that they should sneak off.)
==Scene 5==
(Darren and Rebecca are wandering in the woods.)
Darren: We need to sneak this far just to make out?
Rebecca: It's about mood, Darren.
(Eventually, they reach a small, abandoned, creepy cabin. Lightning strikes as Rebecca and Darren's faces light up in fear.)
Rebecca: Nice.
Darren: I get it now!
(Darren attempts to push the door open, but is unable to due to furniture blocking the way. He tries to turn the lights on, to no avail. After finally pushing the door open wide enough to enter, a flashlight rolls by itself on the ground in front of them, flickering on and off. Darren goes to pick it up...)
(SLAM!)
(The cabin door slams close by itself, startling the duo. Behind them, Uzi is hiding in the shadows, laughing like a madwoman after being transformed into a bat-like monster by the AbsoluteSolver. She spreads her newly created bat-like wings as she prepares to kill and feast upon them...)
(Meanwhile, N flies down and finds another cabin. He enters, and looks over to see what appears to be some kind of control desk with a monitor hanging overhead that's displaying static. He goes over to investigate. He tries to turn another monitor on, only for it to fry up. He goes over to the static-playing monitor, where he notices a VHS tape underneath: ZOMBIE DRONES. As soon as he touches it, he begins to have brief flashbacks. One involving Cyn, one with a severed arm, and another involving a huge, glitching black hole in the sky with a small label that says "[null]". He backs away in horror.)
(Elsewhere, Uzi continues voraciously cramming the remains of Darren into her mouth. She suddenly begins to vomit, scream, and cough. She looks out the door as her temperature rises again.)
==Scene 6==
(Back with the other campers, Braidon is telling a spoopy story.)
Braidon: But her warranty wasn't expired... IT NEVER EXISTEEEEED!
Sam: It's scary, 'cause it's like-
Emily: Aren't you guys worried about Darren and Rebecca?
Sam: -Real.
Emily: Shouldn't they be back from their... immoral make out session by n-
(She screams as she notices that an arm has grabbed her ankle. It's Rebecca, who crawls towards them while coughing. The bottom half of her body has been cut off, and there is a trail of oil oozing behind her.)
Braidon: Rebecca!?
Lizzy: Who did this to you!?
Rebecca: (Coughing) Don't... remember name... (Cough) Super unpopular...
Sam: Descriptive clues, man!
Rebecca: Purple... eyes... Hot Topic...
Braidon: Uh...
Lizzy: I feel like I remember someone like that...
Sam: From our class?
(All of a sudden, the campfire vanishes, due to someone behind them using her AbsoluteSolver powers. They look behind them and gasp as they hear maniacal laughter. Uzi, controlled by the AbsoluteSolver, is cackling with her bat wings outspread.)
Braidon: Ohhh... You...?
(The campers shrug in unison. Suddenly, Braidon’s head explodes due to Uzi's AbsoluteSolver powers.)
Sam: S-S-SPLIT UP!
Emily: I think I've read that's good!
(The remaining three campers flee for their lives, running in different directions. A book lands near the campfire and opens up by itself to show that, despite what Emily says, it said nothing of the sort.)
==Scene 7==
(Sam is running in the woods when he trips, falls down a hill, and smacks into a tree. He decides to hide behind the tree after spotting Uzi fly to the top of another tree in pursuit. Behind the tree, he looks back. Uzi's gone. He sighs in relief... Not noticing Uzi's tail next to him, which he misses when he looks in its direction.)
Sam: Huh?
(The book Emily was reading falls on his head. He picks it up as he hears Uzi giggling. The book is titled "Final Girl". He slowly looks up.)
Sam: (Fearing for his life) Does it at least have pictures...?
Uzi: It doesn't. I checked.
(Elsewhere, Lizzy hears Sam's scream coming from the distance. She stops to look around and spots what appears to be Emily.)
Lizzy: Oh, thank Robo-God, Final Girl!
(It turns out Uzi had already killed Emily and is playing with her corpse. Uzi snaps her head off and cackles.)
Lizzy: Um... Clashing?
(Uzi uses her AbsoluteSolver to hold Lizzy in a choking position. She makes her way over to her, but is blocked by V. V swipes at Uzi, who falls.)
V: (To Lizzy) Killing her, not saving you.
Lizzy: Okay, mom. (rolls eyes)
Uzi: V... Please...!
V: New body, same horrors. Huh, Cyn?
Uzi: I... don't know... who that is... Can I... talk to N...?
V: Tch. I'll make sure you can't.
(Just as V goes in for the kill, Uzi's tail grabs her and flings her to the side. Uzi pins V to a tree as the latter tries to fire at the former. V misses and barely avoids hitting Lizzy.)
Lizzy: Ugh.
(BOOM!)
(Uzi pins V to the ground, slices off her syringe tail, and prepares to stab her with it...)
N: (Grabs Uzi) Whoops. Easy there, buddy. (Uzi stabs the syringe into his hand.) Haha, ow. Up we go!
(He tosses Uzi into the air, removes V's tail from his hand, and puts his hand in his mouth.)
N: (Muffled) What did I say about antagonizing her?
V: (Pouts) You always take her side!
(N flies up after Uzi.)
==Scene 8==
(Uzi uses her wings to stop herself from flying any higher. She begins to fall back down as N appears next to her.)
N: Uzi, you want to tell me what's the matter?
Uzi: No. Don't look. (She hides herself in her wings.) I'm gross and eating people and stuff...
N: Yeah, we'll figure that part out... (He opens her wings up to see her face.) But, you know that's not what I mean.
Uzi: (Tearing up) Are you, like... gonna leave me?
N: Uzi?
Uzi: Never mind, it's stupid. (She continues hiding in her wings.)
N: (Sighs softly to himself) Before we met, scary stuff was actually... pretty scary. And tonight too, 'cause you weren't with me to make it fun, somehow. (Uzi reveals her face.) I kind of forgot what that was like...
Uzi: (Coming out of hiding) Same. (crying)
N: (Using Uzi's tail as a puppet) Then we'll stick together!
Uzi: (She chuckles and takes the tail back.) Don't freaking touch it. (Beat. She changes the accent of her tail-puppet.) Plus my voice is more like-
(They crash on the ground. V gets ready for a fight, only to see N carrying Uzi in his arms.)
Uzi: Accent was a bad idea anyway. N, I'm... sorry.
N: Eh, not like you killed anyone.
Uzi: Oh no, I definitely-
N: Kidding! Just avoid another whole spire. Baby steps. Together?
(Uzi and N share an embrace. V puts her claws away as Lizzy appears next to her.)
Lizzy: Ew.
V: Don't patronize me.
Lizzy: What? I think it's gross all by myself. God, you're a diva lately. (She walks away.)
==Scene 9==
(The bus gets ready to leave the camp.)
Ronathon: Hiya, hiya!
(The bus drives off. Inside, the teacher is going over the list of students.)
Teacher: (Turns back to V) So, missing some campers here...
(V doesn't respond. She knows what really happened to the missing students. She looks over at Lizzy, next to her. She looks back at Uzi and N. They are both sound asleep, with Uzi resting her head on N's shoulder. Uzi's little insect friend hides in her hat.)
V: (Sighs) Yo, I get hungry, idiot.
Teacher: No name calling. Just a question. (V sits back in her seat.)
(A pool of orange sunlight casts over the bus seat, and Uzi's hand starts smoking under the sunlight. N notices this and reaches to move her hand out of the way. Uzi holds his hand. N quickly, silently lets go without waking Uzi up. He looks over at the Zombie Drones VHS tape he brought with him. The thought of what could be on the tape worries him.)
(Credits roll.)
ru:Синдром Хижины/Стенограмма
Category:Transcripts