Gocnak the barbarian

I found Gocnak up in a alleyway yo. Dude was shivering, cold, n' ridin' solo chillin next ta a thugged-out dumpsta n' shit. I strutted up ta his ass n' knelt down. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I ran mah right hand all up in his afro n' whispered ta his ass dat every last muthafuckin thang is goin ta be ok. Gocnak fuckin started ta sob n' I busted away his cold-ass tears. I picked up Gocnak n' threw his ass over mah shoulder n' shit. I carried his ass ta tha nearest four seasons hotel. I had already reserved tha prezial suite fo' mah hoe n' I yo, but dis was mo' blingin. I gave mah hoe a thousand dollars n' holla'd at her ta leave fo' tha night, her dope ass didn't protest. I laid Gocnak down on tha bed n' cuddled up against his muthafuckin ass. Dude fuckin started ta cry mo' heavily. I started cuppin his nutsack, his thugged-out lil' pubic afro wrapped round mah fingers. Gocnakz sobs turned ta moans as his crazy-ass manhood fuckin started ta grow. Da feelin of bein dis close ta Gocnak busted mah crazy ass tha fuck into a rage. I tore off mah threadz, showin off mah mega boner n' shit. Gocnak gasped as da perved-out muthafucka saw tha mega boner sway up in tha breeze. Gocnak removed his threadz n' crashed his wild lil' grill onto mah mega boner n' shiznit yo. Dude suckled on mah mega boner violently, causin me ta let up a roar. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. My fuckin roar scared his ass n' dat schmoooove muthafucka hid under tha covers. I threw tha covers off Gocnak n' tackled his muthafuckin ass. I lubed up his thugged-out average dingalin n' guided his ass tha fuck into mah ass. Gocnak whispered tha fuck into mah ear, "Look at these assfuckin strats." I yelped up in excitement yo. Dude speedrunned mah butthole up in 6 secondz flat, freshly smoked up ghetto record. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Da Twitch Chat went bananas, spammin all kindsa muthafuckin soundz Botnak couldn't handle dat shit. Gocnak stood proudly over mah pounded cornhole n' yelled out, "Yo, wuz crackalackin', biatch? Yo ass is smokin tha GocNation!" Gocnak is love, Gocnak is game. THEN I FUCKING DIED. THE FUCKING END.
Category:Ghetto Talk
Category:WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS THIS!?!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Val's Valence