Toaster

Date/Timing: sometime during the 2016 Summer semester
Setting: Dorm kitchen/lounge, Jaeger Academy; Kodiak, USA
Inspired by a Suddenly; Prompts! and Eddie Izzard's "Toasters Lie" bit
.
A vacant-eyed Ren, wearing pajama pants and a jumper, shuffles into the dorm kitchen at a stupid early hour.
"'ey, Ren," yawns Jackson. "Yer jumper's on backwards."
Ren keeps shuffling.
"Are you even awake?" asks Juliet with concern.
"Toaster!" squeaks Ren, scooping it up.
"That thing's broken," reminds Jackson.
"I like toast." Ren presses her cheek to the chrome. "Toasters. They're great."
"I don't think that's healthy," says Juliet. 
"If you're fucking the toaster, leave," says Logan.
"Set the little turny-button thing to four, put toast in and wait for toast to happen." Ren sighs happily, rocks on her heels.
Pencils scratch out homework in workbooks.
/Ploing!
"Boom!" cheers Ren. "Toast!"
"Yay." Logan starts a new page. "Now, shut up," he grumps, "some of us are trying to work."
Ren shrieks—
Jackson starts. 
—whacks the toaster. "You /lied!" Retreats. "You /lied to me! This—" Shoves her toast in its face. "—is three toast! Not four toast! Three toast!" A sweeping 'no'. "Hardly done!"
Toast bounces off the side of Jackson's head.
"Oi!" He ruffles crumbs out of his hair.
"The toaster, Florence," says Juliet with extreme calm.
The toaster remains aloft.
Ren's breathes through her teeth, chest heaving.
"Florence, sweetie, the toaster."
Ren's eyelid twitches. 
"PUT /DOWN THE TOASTER, FLORENCE!"
Logan stomps over, plucks the toaster from Ren's hands, tucks it under his arm, shtumps out.
Juliet, Jackson, and Ren watch him go.
A crash and something metal bounces down the stairs.
Logan stomps back in, brushing off his hands.
Juliet, Jackson, and Ren blink.
"Fixed it," Logan declares.
Category:Ficlet
Category:Jaeger Academy (setting)
Category:Jaeger Academy 2016
Category:Ren
Category:Ren (ficlet)
Category:Jackson
Category:Jackson (ficlet)
Category:Juliet
Category:Juliet (ficlet)
Category:Logan
Category:Logan (ficlet)
Category:Eddie Izzard (reference)
Category:Comments
Category:Ficlets with comments