The MSCP Talk Show

[Warning: Some parts of the show may not be child-friendly]
==Pilot episode==
[The camera focuses in on a female figure in a white lab coat. Her main features are blurred to a point beyond recognition; all you can see is a distinct smirk on her face. The camera focuses in to reveal the figure as...Dr. Sun.]
Dr. Sun: Welcome, everyone, to the first episode of the MSCP Talk-show! I am your host, Doctor Sun. *Spreads her arms open with a sense of grandiose*
[Applause]
Dr. Sun: This is a program that exists for the sole purpose of the entertainment of the MSCP foundation personnel and certain MSCPs with the approval of the 05-Council. Any personnel who shows it to outside sources will be registered Class-A amnesiacs and demoted to D-Class. You can access further episodes via the foundation network. Today, we are featuring Dr. Animus!
Dr. Animus: [Waves at the camera with a polite smile.] Greetings. I am Doctor Animus, the Foundation Psychologist & Psychiatrist, Counselor, and an MSCP Psychiatric Researcher.
Dr. Sun: Also known as the emotional garbage dump of most foundation personnel and MSCPs.
Dr. Animus: I would quite appreciate it if you didn’t word it like that.
Dr. Sun: ...it’s supposed to be a compliment. After all, with all the various levels of fucked up people are around here, being able to take the emotional crap and even make it better is a virtue that I admit I don’t have. Of course, that’s probably because I’m the one that gives the emotional baggage instead of receiving them, anyways.
Dr. Animus: Oh. Well...I’m flattered?
Dr. Sun: Ayyyyy! *Finger guns* That’s the spirit!
Dr. Animus: ...ahem. Anyways. Didn’t you say we have some...questions?
Dr. Sun: Of course. Ahem. Here’s the first letter!
[Displayed on a large screen behind them were the words: “For the both of you: What are usually your motives for killing?” - Agent K]
Dr. Animus: When I kill, I’m usually just following foundation orders. Even then, I’d rather leave the job to some other foundation personnel unless it’s mandatory that I am the one to enact the execution.
Dr. Sun: That’s a boring answer, but expected from someone like you. Hmm...I usually kill for fun- I mean, for my experiments. Or if it has something to do with mint chocolate. Mostly for mint chocolate, actually. Oh, and sometimes because of foundation orders. Anyways, moving on!
[“Where do babies come from?” - Naive in Area-8]
Dr. Animus: Well, you see Naive, when daddy and mommy love each other very much-
Dr. Sun: -or when daddy and mommy think they love each other, or when daddy doesn't really love mommy and is just using her but she thinks he does, or when mommy doesn't love daddy and is just using him but he thinks she does, or when neither of them loves each other and they both know it but perpetuate their destructive relationship anyway for god knows what reason-
Dr. Animus: Dr. Sun! Interrupting people is rude! And that is inappropriate!
Dr. Sun: Blah blah blah. First, they show affection by hugging on a bed. Then, daddy puts his [REDACTED] in mommy’s [REDACTED], although in certain cases mommy can [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] if she is a [REDACTED] or has a [REDACTED].
Dr. Animus: Dr. Sun-
Dr. Sun: Then, when daddy [REDACTED] he [REDACTED] [REDACTED] into the mommy's [REDACTED], resulting in - well, I hope you about deuterostomes. Though, that is only in simplicity.
Dr. Animus: [Sighs quietly]
Dr. Sun: In practice, however, the use of [REDACTED] is always necessary. Also, the concept of [REDACTED], as well as [REDACTED], which most [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] in fiction seem to ignore. Now, going into detail, the male starts by [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED], although the female can take that role, too, though most people prefer for her to start by [REDACTED] the man's [REDACTED] while [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] in a [REDACTED] while the man takes a [REDACTED] up his [REDACTED]. Meanwhile, it is recommended for the man to [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED]. Then they-
===[We are currently experiencing technical difficulties. We will be back soon. Meanwhile, here is an ad from our sponsors!]===
Join the MSCP Foundation! Become a D-Class Personnel. Let us become a united family and say goodbye to your once boring past.
Dr. Sun: Say goodbye to everything from your past.
Nutritionists will make healthy dieting plans specifically for you!
Dr. Sun: Of course, tastiness is guaranteed.
Health physicians will provide you with a carefully made exercise routine to make sure you stay fit!
Dr. Sun: No matter if you want it or not.
We will help you get rid of all your unhealthy addictions.
Dr. Sun: Cigarettes? Alcohol? Where are you gonna get that when you're fending for your life?
There is food that you will definitely like!
Dr. Sun: Though, it's unlikely you'll be able to get a taste of it.
And also the most delicious drinks in the world.
Dr. Sun: That is also unreachable by you.
There are tasty foods that you can eat until you feel like puking.
Dr. Sun: Of course, if you throw it all up, you'll just have to stuff the vomit back down your throat.
Cures for all types of disease!
Dr. Sun: In fact, you're even more worthless than a single block of dirt.
All of your past pains will be soothed.
Dr. Sun: After all, what are your past pains compared to the ones you'll soon receive?
Endearing friends that’ll listen to whatever you have to say. All your fears and anxieties, you can share with them.
Dr. Sun: No matter if you want them to know or not, they see your darkest secrets regardless.
Strange and fascinating creatures freely roam the facility.
Dr. Sun: That is, while you are locked in your cell where you won’t be able to see any of the above.
In the MSCP foundation, you will see:
Dr. Sun: in the MSCP foundation, pray you don’t see:
The fiercest warriors;
Dr. Sun: (When they're swinging their weapons at you)
The most intriguing creatures;
Dr. Sun: (They will start eating you from your feet)
The most interesting Doctors;
Dr. Sun: (*coughs*)
The most mysterious things;
Dr. Sun: (You won’t be able to remember them even if you saw it.)
The most exciting movies;
Dr. Sun: (You'll probably just act out an unimportant character; maybe that canon fodder that gets killed within the first few seconds the murder appears?)
The wildest activities where you can all party together;
Dr. Sun: (Look! It’s yet another contamination breach(TM)!)
Your wildest fantasies can all become real;
Dr. Sun: (Then jump out of your imagination to drag you into your wildest nightmares.)
So what reasons are there for you to not join the ranks of our D-Class personnel?
Dr. Sun: (At least a million.)
Let go of your boring day jobs.
Dr. Sun: (Did you really think those blood-sucking capitalists would let you earn money? How about taxes? Healthcare? Insurance?)
Let go of your heavy burdens.
Dr. Sun: (That is, if they haven’t already started physically growing on you yet.)
And to all those that are watching this message-
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Dr. Sun: We know you are watching.
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Come and join us!
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Dr. Sun: We will find you.
=static-
Let us enjoy a wonderful future together.
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Dr. Sun: You won’t be able to escape us.
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===[Thank you for waiting. We will be back to the program shortly.]===
Dr. Sun: Welcome back to the MSCP Talk show! The next question is coming right up.
[“To the both of you: What’s your favourite part of the human body?” - Curious in Site-21 Class-D cells]
Dr. Animus: The heart. It symbolizes life and emotions, and it’s one of the major organs that is keeping us alive.
Dr. Sun: Well, I like all parts of the body. All of them have their own uses. Though I think I like thigh meat better? Then again, the brain makes wonderful paperweights when placed in a jar...and the eyes make nice decorations...Ah! I can’t decide!
Dr. Animus: I do hope you’re joking, Dr. Sun.
Dr. Sun: It’s fine. I can assure you I only experiment with foundation permission. Or if they deserve it. Mostly.
Dr. Animus: That’s...good to hear?
[“Why is the sky blue?” -Curious in Chile]
Dr. Animus: Well, the sky is a part of nature. I personally like to think that the sky is blue because it gives us a sense of freedom and wonder when we look at it. It's-
Dr. Sun: Actually, the sky is blue because of Rayleigh Scattering by the nitrogen and oxygen molecules in the atmosphere.
Dr. Animus: ...
[“Tell me a fairytale, Dr. Sun!” -Silly in MSCP-004 observation station]
Dr. Animus: That...doesn’t bode well.
Dr. Sun: Alright, then! Once upon a time, Little Red Riding Hood went to visit her grandmother. On the way, a serial killer nicknamed “The big bad wolf” saw her. He asked her where she's going.
Dr. Animus: Oh, so you're going to create a spin-off of Little Red Riding Hood? Interesting choice.
Dr. Sun: After the wolf found out she was going to go visit her grandma, he diverted her attention by suggesting her to go pick flowers in a field of flowers nearby. He was going to kill her grandma, then pretend to be her so that he can kill little red riding hood afterwards.
Dr. Animus: Everything is going strangely normal so far.
Dr. Sun: So, when Riding hood arrived, she saw her grandma looking as refreshed as ever while smoking a cigarette. The big bad wolf was in the bed beside her, wrapped in the sheets and crying like a virgin girl that has just been raped.
Dr. Animus: ...wait-
Dr. Sun: After that, Ricing Hood's grandma and the big bad wolf became friends. In Riding Hood's later visits to grandma's house, she often saw the big bad wolf and grandma hanging out with each other. The end.
Dr. Animus: I...don't think that should be considered a fairytale, Dr. Sun.
Dr. Sun: That was my take on the fairytale- I am simply trying to answer the question. Oh, your doubt hurts me, Dr. Animus. [Pretends to cry in a dramatic fashion]
Dr. Animus: ...alright. It does seem like something that would come from you. [Appears to be physically exasperated at the amount of bullshit he has to deal with on a daily basis]
Dr. Sun: Next question!
[“Why is the Raven like a writing desk?” -Very bothered with the question]
Dr. Animus: Ah, are you making a reference to the book Alice in Wonderland written by Lewis Carrol? Though, according to the author himself, I don't think the riddle had an actual answer-
Dr. Sun: Because they both have quills dipped in ink.
Dr. Animus: ...Ah. I’ve never thought of that before. Lord, why am I not surprised that you of all people would be the one to know the answer to such a nonsensical riddle?
Dr. Sun: Aaand- that’s the bottom of the list. I guess we’ll cut the pilot episode here for now. Thank you for attending the show, Animus- your help is greatly appreciated.
Dr. Animus: It’s no problem. It was a...pleasure to be here.
Dr. Sun: If you have any future suggestions for the program, go on ahead and tell us! I accept all questions or requests for me to feature others (both personnel and MSCPs) on the talk show. Secure, Contain, and Protect. I'll see you next time.
-Static-
==Episode 2==
[Doctor Sun is standing in the middle of an unidentifiable corridor, presumably somewhere in the Foundation. She is clutching a clipboard.]
Dr. Sun: Welcome back to another episode of the MSCP Talk Show. Today, we will start by answering a few questions that were previously asked.
[The camera cuts to a section of the papers on the clipboard in Dr. Sun's hands: "Wow, they must be talking about some top-secret government stuff in certain questions if they have to keep redacting most of it.” -S]
Dr. Sun: No commentary there.
[“What is this? And what is gonna be happening here?” - Confounded H]
Dr. Sun: Well you see Confounded, this is a talk-show program that's exclusively for those that work and lives in the Foundation. This includes all staff, possible MSCPs, and maybe some D-Class personnel. I will be taking all the letters and questions that are asked by audiences of this show and answering and replying to them. I might occasionally accept activities and such, but that really depends on the mood I'm in when I am considering it. I will also be interviewing any requested entities, be that a Doctor, a member of the D-Class personnel, the 05-Council, an MSCP, or something else. I hope that is a satisfactory answer?
Dr. Sun: Now, that is the bottom of the question list. We will be moving on to the next part of this episode: an 'interview' with MSCP-007! I managed to, *ahem*, persuade 05-6 into letting me conduct this 'experiment.' So, thank him the next time you see him in the hallway for allowing me to get a chance for this interview. Now, let's continue.
[The camera cuts to Dr. Sun swiping her clearance card to the entrance to MSCP-007's containment chamber, She enters.]
Dr. Sun: MSCP-007? Are you there?
MSCP-007: Yes, Hello doctor.
Dr. Sun: Wonderful. How are you feeling today?
MSCP-007: I feel the same every other day. This day is not any different.
Dr. Sun: Ah, alright. Let's start with our questions. How did you come into containment, 007?
MSCP-007: They were called to an apartment in [REDACTED], a man had reported me moving something in his house. Of course, the foundation came as police. And what do they find standing in the living room? Me.
Dr. Sun: How many security did you kill?
MSCP-007: I strangled one to death, ripped out another person's heart, threw somebody on the ground and stomped on their head, around 3 people. There were only about 5 that came to get me.
Dr. Sun: [Eyes seems to brighten up slightly at the mention of gore] That sounds interesting! Though, would you mind if I ask about your origin or why you kill?
MSCP-007: I have never seen anybody that seems to be as delighted at the talk of violence as you. On the other note, I don't really like to talk about my origins, but I guess I have no choice.
Dr. Sun: No no, you do. I don’t like doing anything that forces someone against their will...most of the time. Especially when I'm trying to be polite, which is how I usually like to commence my conversations. Instead of force, I...persuade. In fact, just tell me what you're comfortable with.
MSCP-007: I do have a choice? Well then. I won't go too deep into detail. But I have been around since.. I don't know, the 1800's I guess? Everything was just starting to get more advanced. Like how crossbows started to come into existence and so on so forth. I only remember waking up in a heavily forested area. Walking a few miles before coming across a small town. And why I kill people? Well, basically I've always had this fragile personality on when it comes to words. When people started coming after me and calling me a thing and firing arrows at me...Well, you get the rest. That's all I feel like telling you right now. It gets more complicated.
Dr. Sun: What about the people whose house you've broken into? Is there a reason for that, too?
MSCP-007. Yes actually.
Dr. Sun: Would you care to elaborate?
MSCP-007: Fine. I started doing this around 120 years ago. Around the 1880s. I figured that I had to seek shelter from all the people that wanted to try and get me. So I've gone inside their homes, usually in the basement. And would usually stay until either I felt like I had to move. Or they spotted me.
Dr. Sun: How do you feel about being contained?
MSCP-007: Personally, I have had mixed feelings about being in containment. For one, I don't have to do a run and hide, in and out thing anymore, basically not running away from society. But on the other hand, It's quite a small space for me.
Dr. Sun: [Nods] Would you like me to assign a larger containment facility for you?
MSCP-007: Frankly, I think I can stay in this space for a little longer. As it doesn't bother me that much. But yes, I would like to have more running room in the future.
Dr. Sun: Is there anything under your visor?
MSCP-007: Nothing but a bedrock-like skeleton and a bunch of yellow ooze that makes up my entire body.
Dr. Sun: Have you ever tried eating anything before?
MSCP-007: I tried eating wood before.
Dr. Sun: What did it taste like?
MSCP-007: This is getting personal, But anyways, it tasted like nothing. Bland.
Dr. Sun: Well, this is supposed to be a talk show, after all. Have you tried any other foods?
MSCP-007: Well, If you read my file, I do sometimes rip out people's hearts, and either destroy them or [REDACTED] them.
Dr. Sun: Just those? Man, you really need to try some damned mint chocolate. Or pizza? Hmmm....that would be against protocols, wouldn’t it? Are there any protocols against me trying to feed you stuff?
MSCP-007: Actually, yes. Certain MSCP's, according to something I read after killing a security guard one time. "Cannot be feed unless needed." Though that was back in.. 2007.
Dr. Sun: You know what? When did I care about the fucking rules anyways? Yeah, I'm definitely setting up a bad example here, haha. Don’t try this at home! Or work! Or....just don’t try it at all. You're not Dr. Sun, you can’t pull it off.
MSCP-007: Plus, I can't eat with my mouth. I shove it in my visor.
Dr. Sun: You can eat with your asshole for all I care, I don’t do racial discrimination. I don't think others should either seeing as we work for the foundation, but I guess some still do. Probably also the reason they're going to die a horrible death.
MSCP-007: Is that supposed to offend me?
Dr, Sun: Not unless you take it as an insult.
MSCP-007: Alright then...
Dr. Sun: [Fumbles around, trying to find something in her coat] Hold on....ah, here it is. [Takes out an entire bar of mint chocolate] I'm not supposed to hoard them, but whatever. [Carefully breaks off a bit of the chocolate (along with the wrapping) and handed it to MSCP-007]
MSCP-007: You do realize there are guards around... Right?
Dr. Sun: [Turns around and stares unnervingly at the security guards that's supposed to be supervising the interview.]
Guard 1: She's...not staring at us, right?
Guard 2: Ohgodohgodohgod she is!!!! Shhiiiittttt... What happened to the last guy who pissed her off again?
Guard 1: I heard his kidney was 'confiscated' because apparently, his request for a sick day off from his job didn't reach his site command...
Guard 1&2: [Shivers]
Guard 2: It'll be ok, just ignore her and for the love of God DON'T MAKE EYE CONTACT!
[The two guards pretend not to be nervous. In fact, they suddenly found the blank walls behind them very interesting. They don’t even notice what's happening during the interview...]
Dr. Sun [Smiles cheerfully] I don't think they will be a problem.
MSCP-007: Alright then. I think they got the message.
Dr. Sun: [Rolls her eyes] Just take it.
MSCP-007: [Grabs the mint chocolate bar] I still don't know what this is. But okay.
Dr: Sun: I recommend taking off the wrapper first. It is often a rookie mistake for first-time chocolate eaters to eat the entire thing with the wrapper on...
MSCP-007: [Ignoring what she said, and eating it with the wrapper on.]
Dr. Sun: Welp, screw that, then. How does it taste?
MSCP-007: Tastes like wood.
Dr. Sun: Do you have no taste buds? Does a heart taste different?
MSCP-007: My entire body is just a bedrock skeleton and a giant mass of yellow ooze. But hearts do taste different. They do not taste like wood.
Dr. Sun: [Ponders thoughtfully] Wait here for a few seconds.
[Dr. Sun then proceeds to produce a...kidney from the inside of her lab coat?? The blood is still dripping from the organ. It seems fresh.]
Dr. Sun: Try this instead.
MSCP-007: Look, an organ.
MSCP-007: [Proceeds to eat the kidney]
MSCP-007: Tastes like a heart.
Dr: Sun: So you're a carnivore! That makes sense. [Doesn't seem to realize that blood is all over her hands]
MSCP-007: I feel weird eating food.
Dr. Sun: How so?
MSCP-007: Unlike humans, I have no stomach. The food I eat just gets absorbed into the yellow goo that encompasses my entire body.
Dr. Sun: The stomach basically does somewhat the same thing, only slower. [Suddenly realizes that there's blood on her hands] Oh! How impolite of me! Excuse me for a few seconds [Calmly licks it off]
MSCP-007: Look, blood.
Dr. Sun: Yes, blood. [Produces a bottle put of nowhere and sprays hands with the bottle sanitizer, rubbing it thoroughly] Now that we‘ve got the information gathering part out of the way, let‘ someone move onto the more entertaining parts!
MSCP-007: Okay then...
Dr. Sun: ...hmmm...You know, you have been oddly cooperative so far, Why haven’t you tried killing me yet?
MSCP-007: I guess you haven't read my file. Don't piss me off and we will be fine, capiche?
Dr. Sun: Yeah yeah, don't provoke. Why are you called the Operator anyways?
MSCP-007: Very important, I've earned that name by just operating inside people's homes without them knowing.
Dr. Sun: Is it just me, or did that not make much sense at all? Nevermind. Wait- [Suddenly starts staring at MSCP-007 with an...odd expression on her face] Can you die?
MSCP-007: There's been that time when me and 006 fought each other. I didn't die, but she caused a rip in my chest. Causing some yellow ooze to pour out.
Dr. Sun: So you can be damaged badly?
MSCP-007: Yes. But I cannot die.
Dr. Sun: Alright. [Thoughtful expression] ...can I try drinking some of the yellow goop?
MSCP-007: It's most likely going to burn your insides.
Dr. Sun: Just the more reason to try it. Would you mind if I get a sample?
MSCP-007: I cannot believe you want to try and kill yourself.. Again..
Dr. Sun: The art of killing oneself is one that only few can master.
MSCP-007: Fine, whatever floats your boat.
Dr. Sun: [Chuckles] They don’t call me the foundation expert on how to die for nothing.
MSCP-007: You've told around 50 people to come and fight me. And they've all died.
Dr. Sun. I know! It's fun to watch people watch to their deaths. Quite therapeutic. Especially when they know that they're going to die but they still have to do it because they'd rather die than have me expose their darkest secrets to the world. Heh.
MSCP-007: Alright, get me a sword.
Dr. Sun: [Raises eyebrow] Can't you just get some from your visor?
MSCP-007: True. [Proceeds to open up his visor, and ooze starts dripping out.]
Dr. Sun: [Gets cup out of nowhere and starts collecting a fair amount] You can stop around [Squints at cup] ...now.
MSCP-007: [Closes visor.]
[Dr. Sun takes the cup and threw the entire contents of the cup down her throat. It resembles strangely of an alcoholic trying out a particularly strong drink. The liquid starts melting her face off, though her mouth is still kept in that unwavering smirk.]
MSCP-007: If I had emotions, I would be laughing. But all I can do is just tell you I was right.
Dr. Sun: [A part of her vocal cords seems to be broken, but she seems to be chuckling, too]
MSCP-007: You can respawn, correct?
MSCP-007: If so, would you like me to kill you so you can get back to normal?
Dr. Sun: [Waves at MSCP-007 dismissively and retrieves a dagger from her side then stabs herself]
MSCP-007: Nevermind.
[Another Dr. Sun appears behind MSCP-007. She retrieved the dagger from her old physical body and equipped it again.
MSCP-007: Oh, hello back there. I know you're behind me.
Dr. Sun: Yes, captain obvious. I was behind you. That tasted nice, kinda like a mix between poison and alcohol? Definitely gonna try some more later. Furthermore, I have just observed that it appears you have some sort of of....personality change once in a while. How... peculiar.
MSCP-007: Oh you say what now?
Dr. Sun: Well then. It looks like I know you better than you do.
MSCP-007: You little [REDACTED].
O5-6: [Over the speakers] Sun, we know what you're trying to do. We would like you to end your actions immediately.
Dr. Sun: ...heh. But no one's going to stop me from doing...this! [Pulls out a lethal-grade taser and zaps MSCP-007]
MSCP-007: ALRIGT THAT'S [REDACTED] IT YOU LITTLE [REDACTED] [REDACTED].
[Dr. Sun open to containment chamber and runs out]
MSCP-007: Well [REDACTED].
[MSCP-007 has breached containment-]
===[WE ARE HAVING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES. PLEASE WAIT WHILE WE TRY TO FIX THE PROBLEM... MEANWHILE, HERE IS AN AD FROM OUR SPONSORS]===
They aren't DOMTOR, or the [REDACTED]'s at the UNDUOI. They're the NAIPIU! The National Agency Of Investigation Paranormal Investigation Unit, cleaning up after the MSCP Foundation's ass since 1951!
===[THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE. WE WILL RETURN TO OUR REGULAR PROGRAM ON A FEW SECONDS.]===
[Dr. Sun is back in MSCP-007's containment chamber, only now on the observatory area instead of the containment area. She is happily crunching away a newly obtained bar of mint chocolate.]
MSCP-007: You're back...well. Shall we... Continue this "interview"?
Dr. Sun: Indeed. It'stotallynotanelaborateruseformetostealmintchocolate.
MSCP-007: It better not be.
Dr. Sun: Hm? What?
MSCP-007: Nevermind, let's continue this little "Interview".
Dr. Sun: You must've been hearing things. Perhaps you should go ask Dr. Animus for some therapy? You seem to have anger and stress management issues, and I'm sure he can help.
MSCP-007: I don't need therapy. I've been like this my whole life.
Dr. Sun: But it might make you feel better. (It'salsototallynotanelaboraterusetomakeDr.Animus'slifeharder)
MSCP-007: Let's just continue...
Dr. Sun: [Shrugs] Whatever floats, your boat. How many personnel did you kill before you got re-contained again?
MSCP-007: Which breach?
Dr. Sun: The one that just happened.
MSCP-007: Around 30. They kept coming up close. They should've known better.
Dr. Sun: Ah, no sense of personal space and an odd insistence on melee combat. A death sentence when you're working around dangerous entities that wouldn’t mind killing you for trivial things.
MSCP-007: They kept hitting me with swords. Some personnel ran by me. which was stupid.
Dr. Sun: However, you did get re-contained nonetheless.
MSCP-007: Well, I was caught by some actually smart MTF units. Who stayed a distance and shot at me with bows and crossbows.
Dr. Sun: [Smirk widens] So you were too slow?
MSCP-007: I'm not that slow, I caught some of their arrows.
Dr. Sun: But you were slow enough to be contained. Heh. No wonder MSCP-006 managed to beat you.
MSCP-007: I swear to god. She broke out of containment during that termination test. And I also managed to make her bleed in eight different areas, and almost ripped off her arm. She just ran away.
Dr. Sun: But she still beat you. And escaped. You didn’t.
MSCP-007: I would stay it's a draw though...
Dr. Sun: [Shrug] She escaped. You didn’t.
MSCP-007: Alright you little [REDACTED], the guards rushed in. I would've escaped but they had damn tranquillizers.
Dr. Sun: Sticks and stones might break my bones, but names can't do shit. [Her insufferable smirk widens as she bit off a piece of the chocolate]
MSCP-007: Next question, please. Also, don't call me a weakling. Your search parties can't do jack shit. They can't even find her.
Dr. Sun: I agree. This is why I'm not the useless head of human resources or the guy that trains these failures.
MSCP-007: And this is why you're the death expert and researcher.
Dr. Sun: Well, no duh? I'm the only one with skills suitable for the job. By the way, I was eating popcorn during the termination test. The fight was indeed very hilarious.
MSCP-007: Oh so you saw me almost rip her arm off. Splendid. Let's move onto the next question.
Dr. Sun: I also watched 006 escape. But that‘s another story, indeed. Would you like to hear about a fairytale on crack?
MSCP-007: Excuse me, are you a drug addict expert too?
Dr. Sun: Perhaps. I like drugging others with tablets and pills that have...interesting effects. I might ask for permission to get some more of that yellow ooze from earlier. I think I've just discovered a new drug recipe.
MSCP-007: Moving on.
Dr. Sun: You have no sense of humour. [Rolls eyes]
MSCP-007: I have no emotions. And I didn't try to make a joke at all.
Dr, Sun: Hate and anger is an emotion, and I was referring to how you didn’t get the joke.
MSCP-007: Emotion as in happiness.
Dr. Sun: So you don't feel satisfaction when you kill?
MSCP-007: I do, but do I show it? No. I'm a cold-blooded killer like almost all of the sentient MSCP's you guy's have contained. Except for MSCP-002. Those creatures are fire eaters. And MSCP-038. That traitor.
Dr. Sun: MSCP-038 still killed people with no remorse. So I wouldn’t really count it. Also, I think it should be considered Euclid by now. Who knows, I think I'll ask if they can revoke its privileges to roam the facility.
MSCP-007: She's allowed to wander around freely with the object class of Safe. Also, she isn't the one who killed those guards. It was 006 and 011. OH, you mean the doctor. Yeah, she most likely gave him to 006 and 011. But she hasn't killed anybody else. Not that I know of.
Dr. Sun: Are you suggesting the next time someone accidentally pisses her off we should just let her kill them without any consequences and still consider her as a Class-Safe? Wow.
MSCP-007: Safe MSCP's are generally MSCP's that are fully understood, and don't have to have as harsh containment procedures as a Euclid MSCP would, like me. It doesn't mean that they are harmless though. That's what I've heard from the researchers when they were debating my object class.
Dr. Sun: Then it's her bond with 006 and 011 makes her dangerous. Unless you suggest we somehow cut her off from those two?
MSCP-007: I don't mind 011, I actually helped her out one time. But that [REDACTED] 006? I got something to settle with her. And I just think 038 is a traitor overall.
Dr. Sun: I don't get the termination test, either, The foundation code is “Secure, Contain, Protect,” not “Destroy, Destroy, Destroy.” Even if it was dangerous, cross-testing should be done in a more responsible way.
MSCP-007: Cross-testing is used sometimes to get rid of dangerous MSCP's, like Keter level and sometimes dangerous Euclid level MSCP's.
MSCP-007: Okay, could we please get back on topic? I heard from the guards that the O5's want you to interview the traitor next.
MSCP-007: Also, I suggest 002 after 038. I think some of those MSCP-002 monsters can talk. Just try not to burn yourself in the process, they've burned my before.
Dr. Sun: You care for me? An MSCP to a Foundation Personnel? How sweet.
MSCP-007: No, I don't. I'm warning you. They've burned off my protective layer before. I know how dangerous they are.
Dr. Sun: So you do care? Right after I used you to get what I wanted, too? Awww...
MSCP-007: No, I don't. [007 would attempt to smash the glass].
MSCP-007: Wait..you're just trying to use me again, get back on track with the questions.
Dr. Sun: Hey, I think I just discovered a way of killing an MSCP's will to breach containment. Perhaps I should report this to the 05 council. Eh, probably not going to bullshit my way through that.
MSCP-007: You just ask me another question, alright?
Dr. Sun: [The clipboard from the beginning is nowhere to be found]
MSCP-007: You left it inside the containment chamber you goddamn [REDACTED]
Dr. Sun: You think I didn't notice? The thing contained the two questions from the beginning and I was just goingthroughthewholethingmakinguprandomstuffonthespot.
MSCP-007: Well you did just cause a containment breach. I really wonder how you're not fired yet.
Dr. Sun: So?
MSCP-007: Ugh, nevermind.
Dr. Sun: Moving on. Do you have any hobbies?
MSCP-007: Other than being a bi-polar killer? No.
Dr. Sun: Not even things like reading? Writing? Enjoying the pained screams of the souls of the damned?
MSCP-007: I only read manuals I find off of dead personnel. But yes, I Enjoy the pained screams of the souls of the damned. Though I don't show it, as I'm incapable of expressing emotions.
MSCP-007: Are we done here? Or do you still have more questions?
Dr. Sun: I would recommend the book "Painful Tortures Throughout History."
MSCP-007: I only use my hand to hand combat moves. And they work just fine.
Dr. Sun: A shame. Well then, it looks like our time here is up. I'll send some fresh organs in later to compensate for everything else that happened today.
MSCP-007: Vale.
Dr. Sun: Au Revoir to you too, good sir. [Tips hat towards MSCP-007 as she backs away through the exit]
===Now, a word from the O5 council.===
O5-13: I swear to god if personnel keep joining DOMTOR I'll have O5-6 come with a team of MTF units and O5-11 to support him in internal sabotage. You will experience a cruel and unusual death that will make a lot of possible other options in the MSCP Foundation look like a damned papercut. Just stop joining DOMTOR. Even The freaking Administrator agrees that DOMTOR will be the death of you. Thank you.
===Wrap up===
[Dr. Sun in back at the unidentifiable hallway, still eating on that piece of mint chocolate]
Dr. Sun: And all in all, I consider that as a successful endeavor. Maybe not a successful interview, but definitely a successful endeavor. In fact, I also managed to get some more information on MSCP-007. I expect the other event to happen somewhere around...now.
[A voice in the background]: PERSONNEL ████ SUN! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST F-[REDACTED] DO?
Dr. Sun: Welp, and here concludes another episode of the MSCP Talk show. I am you host, Dr. Sun. Secure, Contain, Protect. Gotta go...
-static-
==Episode three==
[Applause] 
[The camera pans in on no other than...Dr. Sun]
Dr. Sun: Aaaand welcome back to another episode ooofff- the MSCP Talk Show! I have finally <S>escaped</S> gotten out of the quarantine the 05 council placed me in due to...recent events. Ahem. The clouds don’t seem happy today unfortunately. Anyways, today, back at the studio, we're going to be interviewing...
Dr.Mikey: Hello, I'm Dr. Mikey. 
Dr. Sun: Yup. Dr. Mikey here is a foundation researcher and a myth buster. Also seen as a social recluse by some of the people that works around him. What do you say about that, Dr. Mike?
Dr. Mikey: I think they're just jealous, but I don't bother listening to them anyway.
Dr. Sun: Nice attitude. Is that also how you got the nickname “Smartass?”
Dr. Mikey: Well if I'm the smartass, they got to ponder: What if I'm the dumbass? Haha.
Dr. Sun: [Chuckles] Well, I like your sense of humour. 
Dr. Mikey: This is a special occasion, you almost never get to hear it. I'm always busy doing something. To be more specific, MSCP-063 as of recent.
Dr. Sun: Yes, I have read that from your personnel file. So, how is it going along?
Dr. Mikey: For one, it is a lot more communicative then I first thought. I'm not sure what species it is yet, neither if it comes from earth or not. But what I can confirm? It has the ability to sense and portray human emotion. Very different from the other cases I've worked on.
Dr. Sun: Would you mind giving us some basic information on MSCP-063?
Dr. Mikey: I would not mind at all. [Clears throat] MSCP-063, also known as the Crier, is a pale figure who has the tendency to sob. His behavior mostly consists of sobbing in a corner of his containment. He was found in a dumpster in a local city's back alley way by the local sheriff department after several complaints about crying, it captured and brought the containment around a week or two later. 
Dr. Sun: Do you have any idea why it cries? 
Dr. Mikey: That we don't. All we can base it on at this moment; it must've gone through a form of trauma.
Dr. Sun: Are you planning to ask more questions about...’the intelligence?’
Dr. Mikey: I am. Originally before 'the intelligence' was mentioned, I was planning to end the sessions because it was just moaning and crying, not giving me anything sensible. I'm unsure whether it means us, living beings or another form of life which could be a threat to it's kind, or even a potential threat to us.
Dr. Sun: Ah, alright. Have you ever considered adding security to his containment chamber? 
Dr. Mikey: It has not shown any signs of aggression or will to escape. It couldn't care less about moving on. It's a strange and uncommon behavior for MSCPs, I'm positive it has a fear of what's beyond the containment.
Dr. Sun: What is the entity worth capturing aside from their strange tendencies to cry a lot? 
Dr. Mikey: I believe finding species beyond us is like finding a gem. This creature probably knows as much as we do, maybe more.
Dr. Sun: Hm. Interesting. Important questions aside, does MSCP-063 need to ingest food? 
Dr. Mikey: We have tried feeding it several portions of various sizes. It has not taken much interest in eating or drinking. It will occasionally observe the food, but will not bother going further.
Dr. Sun: Has it requested for anything so far?
Dr. Mikey: No, actually. The only thing it wants is to be left alone. And if it's asked to be interviewed, it basically just gives itself up and does it without any second thought.
Dr. Sun: Do you think it'll be possible to get MSCP-063 in the interview? 
Dr. Mikey: I wouldn’t deny it, but despite the fact that it has no interest in escaping, I will say it is VERY shy and cowardly. It won't hurt anybody, yet it also hates being exposed to a various amount of life around it.
Dr. Sun: Do you think it would work if we went into it's containment chamber?
Dr. Mikey: You know what, that might actually do.
Dr. Sun: Alright. We'll be right back, folks.
===[Please wait for a few moments. Meanwhile, here is a friendly reminder from the 05 council!]===
Here, we would like to remind you that all personnel (and some MSCPs) interacting with Dr. Sun m u s t read the list of her infractions before coming into contact. We will not and cannot save you if you make a bet that involves: money, all your money, your underwear, everything you have of value, your firstborn child, your secondborn child, all of your unborn children, all of your existing children, your fiancée, any of your family members, your kidney, you heart, your brain, your eyes, your ears, your stomach, your lungs, your reproduction system, your physical shell, and/or your soul, etc.
We will be ready to prepare a funeral for anyone who refuses to obey this rule.
-05-██
===[We're back! Thank you for your patience.]===
[Camera cuts to Dr, Sun and Dr. Mikey inside of MSCP-063's containment chamber]
Dr. Mikey: Alright, MSCP-063. We have brought a guest tonight and we would like you to answer some questions...
MSCP - 063: [Sobs] What do you want from me?
Dr. Sun: Well don’t you look depressed...
Dr. Mikey: Dr. Sun, please keep it rational. 
Dr. Sun: No, I was simply thinking of sending it to Dr. Animus. 
Dr. Mikey: I don't think it wants to be interviewed by anyone else except me. Almost like I'm the person who answered it's SOS. 
Dr. Sun: So it has a special bond to you?
Dr. Mikey: I guess that's what you call it. Get that look off your face.
Dr. Sun: I'm sorry, but the smirk is my default expression, [Despite her apologetic tone, her insufferable smile seems to have widened slightly]
Dr. Mikey: Oh lord, you're a strange case. Anywho, back to MSCP-063.
Dr. Sun: Does anyone wat a mint chocolate before we start? Dr. Mike? MSCP-063?
Dr. Mikey: I'm fine.
MSCP - 063: No thanks. [Continues sobbing.]
Dr. Sun: Are you sure? 
MSCP - 063: Yes.
<S>Dr. Sun: [Muttering] Don't worry, someday you'll realize the answer is always mint chocolate....everything eventually leads to mint chocolate in the end...</S>
Dr. Mikey: Alright. So MSCP-063, our main query for this session. Who is the intelligence?
MSCP - 063: I can't let you find out. I made a promise.
Dr. Sun: A promise to who? 
MSCP - 063: I don't know who they are. [Looks around frantically]
Dr. Mikey: Well could you give some sort of explanation? 
MSCP - 063: They're a force stronger than us. They have nothing but hatred. They want all dead, they want the kingdom to themselves. My family and friends have died to them. Now I'm locked away in this cell, but it's my only safety against what lurks out there.
Dr. Sun: Oh, great. Another group just to show how utterly useless the foundation can be sometimes. Maybe I should consider switching jobs someday...
MSCP - 063: No, no, no! You don't understand. This isn't an organization. This is something else... truly. It's all I know!
Dr. Sun. Yup, really considering switching jobs. 
MSCP - 063: There won't be a job to switch. It don't want recruits. It only needs itself. It'll kill you, and you. And then whatever is left.
Dr. Sun: Oh, a shame, then. Also, I don’t die, buddy. 
MSCP - 063: You wouldn't know that. We all die in a way. Physical, spiritual. I can't recall how many times I've died.
Dr. Sun: Is that so? [Chuckles darkly] 
MSCP - 063: RAAAAGGGH! That laugh. It reminds me of the same heckling those evil pricks let out killing my friends, my family. My loved community. You would feel the same, BELIEVE ME.
Dr. Sun: I believe I know that better than you ever will. Now, can you tell me what you know about ‘them?’
MSCP - 063: I can't explain, you'd have to observe them. Maybe capture one?
Dr. Sun: We'll consider it. 
Dr. Mikey: Right, I think that'll conclude this meeting. Thank you again, MSCP-063. You may go back to your activity. Dr. Sun, mind heading back to the studio?
Dr. Sun: Still not up to taking mint chocolate? Not even a little piece?
MSCP - 063: [Sighs] Leave me a small piece.
Dr. Sun: [Visibly brightens up] Alright! 
[Dr. Sun produces a small piece of chocolate out of...her back??? And hands it to MSCP-063] 
Dr. Sun: There you go. Remember to take off the wrapper. 
MSCP - 063: Okay.
Dr. Sun: I believe this is farewell for now, then. Au revoir. [Smiles while tipping the black hat on her head toward MSCP-063's direction and exits. Dr. Mikey follows]
Dr. Mikey: Alright, so what we can conclude from this session is that the reason he has constant negative emotions is due to an unheard of species that harmed his community and close ones. 
Dr. Sun: He also claims that they’re more powerful than the foundation. How much truth do you think that statement holds? 
Dr.Mikey: I wouldn't deny it's the truth. But it's one of those kinds of things where we have to wait and see. We'll take up on it's recommendation, let's capture one and see just how evil they are.
Dr. Sun: That's up for the 05 council to decide.
Dr. Mikey: We'll set up a meeting with them, tell them what we know, and I guess we'll work it out.
Dr. Sun: Hey, I never agreed to get involved. But I wish you luck on your endeavour, good monsieur. 
Dr. Mikey: And o-gah-blah to you. [Shakes head, chuckling]
[The camera pans in on Dr. Sun again]
Dr. Sun: [Claps her hands together and turns to the camera] And hereby concludes episode 3 of the MSCP talk-show. I think this is actually my first effective interview on the show so far? The last few had at least one strange occurrence. Regardless, this has been an 'enlightening' experience. Secure, contain, protect. I'll see you next time. 
[Static]
==Episode quatre==
[Dr. Sun is standing in front of the door to yet another containment chamber]
Dr. Sun: Welcome everyone, to the fourth episode of...The MSCP Talk Show! Today, we will be 'interviewing' MSCP-002, as per the request of many enthusiastic audiences. They have just been fed, which will hopefully lower their aggressiveness. So, here we go.
[Dr. Sun enters the containment chamber and walks to the center. The automatic doors close behind her. There is literally no protection on her, which was probably against regular protocol. Don‘t do this if you’re not Dr. Sun.]
Dr. Sun: Welp, hello ladies and gentlemen. How was your meal?
MSCP-002: Yes, it was quite nice. But, something alive would be preferable. You; are alive. No protection, nothing.
Dr. Sun: Touché. [Dodges the attack that was attempted from behind her]
2nd and 3rd MSCP-002: [Hiss, attempting to draw Dr. Sun's attention.]
Dr. Sun: Nice distraction. [Dodges again] Now, can we please calm down? I have a fresh liver if that means anything.
[Produces several still warm and dripping livers from the inside of her...coat? How does she even keep that much stuff underneath? She then throws them on the ground and back away.]
Dr. Sun: All yours. I hope this would be enough to deal for a few minutes of interview time? Or do you want an entire fresh corpse?
1st MSCP-002: Aliiiiiive... Would be preferred.
Dr. Sun: [Rolls eyes] Didn’t you just get a fucking D-Class? Lots of fat on there too, from what I could tell.
3rd MSCP-002: Only Jolk got it!
5th MSCP-002: No I didn't!
[3rd and 5th MSCP-002 start fighting]
1st MSCP-002: Now would be the time, before... we run out of our patience.
Dr. Sun: [Mutters] Isn’t the foundation supposed to take care of this shit before I come in? Man, the agent teams are getting worse every single damned year. [Sigh]
1st MSCP-002: Yes, but we ate the guy feeding us. Kinda boney though. It wasn't enough for everyone.
Dr. Sun: [Deadpan] ...of course you did. Now, I distinctly remember having blackmail on D-9723 and D-1739...hmmmm....May I should make a quick call?
1st MSCP-002: Who? Either way, may we begin... We are running out of patience. And you look fresh, after all half of us are hungry.
Dr. Sun: Yeah, and that's why I'm trying to get you extra food, idiots. [Rolls eyes]
[2nd MSCP-002 looks over to her, trying to get away from the 5th MSCP-002.]
2nd MSCP-002: What'd she call us!? [Proceeds to hiss and growl]
Dr. Sun: ...if I opened the containment chamber, would you cause enough chaos for me to steal min-
Announcements: Dr. Sun, no.
[The 002's surround her.]
1st MSCP-002: Let's. Begin. Human scum. Before we rip you apart.
Dr. Sun: [Rubs temples] This is supposed to be an interview. I demand a pay raise after this, you hear me?!
Anouncement: ...
Dr. Sun: Yeah, sure. Whatever. I never did experience getting ripped apart by a bunch of fire monsters, eh? Guess I can finally cross that off the list after this. [Sits down and waits]
1st MSCP-002: Begin? Or are you going to sit there and wait till we rip you apart?
[The 5 other MSCP-002's go behind her, and crouch]
Dr. Sun: Yeah? I like to test things out before I use them on my victi- I mean, test subjects. So, go ahead.
1st MSCP-002: You might be the only victim...
Dr. Sun: [Smirk widens] Believe me, not after this visit. Expect a lot more foo- I mean, guests. Expect a lot more guests to come your way.
[2nd and 4th MSCP-002 get up, and start circling around Dr. Sun]
1st MSCP-002: Yes, we do expect guests every few months or so. But not like this. Foolish.
Dr. Sun: Well, that number is going to increase very soon. Anyways, if you want to rip me apart, now would be a good time to do so.
[2nd and 4th MSCP-002 lunge at her, ripping her neck. All 6 lunge and dig in except the 1st one, smirking at their accomplishment.]
[The past body of Dr. Sun drops down to the ground.]
1st MSCP-002: Eat! We will soon be out of this prison cell! Free! And, lets not forget we just killed someone of great importance!
[Dr. Sun appears on the spectate region of the containment chamber]
Dr. Sun: Hi again. I've decided that this would be a better place to entetain myself.
1st MSCP-002: How!? But- We ate you!
6th MSCP-002: Does she get smarter every time we eat her?
Dr. Sun: No, but I was just hoping to gauge your traits at a closer distance before the actual interview took place. You're a bit slow, actually. But otherwise, pretty strong. Oh, and you wouldn't get anything out of my corpse other than a good meal; I didn’t bother taking anything but my clothes with me when I came in.
1st MSCP-002: Yes. I do prefer leading prey to its death. But when it first enters...
Dr. Sun: You prefer to distract and surprise your victims. Unfortunately, this strategy kind of gets a bit old after someone’s manages to figure out your pattern of attack.
1st MSCP-002: If you only knew...
[4 MSCP's hanging from the ceiling, drop down, and 2 of them hook onto the glass, which Dr. Sun is standing behind.]
Dr. Sun: Ooh! Nice trick. Can you break through reinforced bulletproof glass, though?
1st MSCP-002: We're fire. We can do it.
[The glass slowly starts to melt]
Dr. Sun: Alright, I'llgogetreadyforstealingsomemintchocolatethen. [Rushes off, grinning]
1st MSCP-002: I don't have time for this! Get back here, lunch! Break through the glass! Kill them! Kill them all!
[The glass shatters as the 7th and 9th MSCP-002 enter the viewing deck.]
[Dr. Sun is nowhere to be found. It seems like she has already left the containment chamber.]
[The other 8 follow, melting all in their paths, except the walls.]
[The walls of the containment chamber happens to be made of fire-proof material.]
1st MSCP-002: Find her! Find and kill Dr. Sun!
6th MSCP-002: We can't get out!
1st MSCP-002: Blast it! Stupid humans, with their stupid technology. [Proceeds to mutter.]
[Suddenly, the containment chamber door opens. Automatically]
6th MSCP-002: Woah. That was easy!
[The 10 proceed to the hallways, trying to find a soul nearby, fresh enough to kill and eat.]
[Unfortunately, no one seems to be around for some strange reason.]
9th MSCP-002: [Hisses] Where is everyone?
1st MSCP-002: They're cowards, these humans. Not even the Force Units are here.
[The water sprinklers suddenly goes off overhead]
[The 10 of the MSCP's screech as the water starts to take them out.]
1st MSCP-002: Back! Retreat! Agh! My fire protection!
[The 10 rush back into the chamber, 2 of them which have lost their fire protection.]
3rd and 8th MSCP: [Howl and hiss] Noooooo! Our fire! The humans will pay!
1st MSCP-002: Fine! We give up! If it's an interview you want, we'll give you one!
[The containment door closes. The entrance to the actual spectating ground opens. The glass is fireproof and reinforced.]
Dr. Sun: The foundation isn’t stupid, MSCP-002. Where do you think thw guards were? Why wasn’t there’s an announcement when you escaped? Why did we open the door? Why wasn’t the glass fireproof despite our knowledge of you? Didn’t you find it strange? [She is eating a seemingly recently obtained mint chocolate bar.]
[The 10 of them proceed to growl]
3rd and 8th MSCP-002: What about oue fire!? We can't just remake it! You humans try to kill us. Wipe us out in this jail cell!
Dr. Sun: Does it kill you if you no longer have your fire?
3rd MSCP-002: We can't eat raw food, we'll die! We cook it while chewing and ripping it apart. See!? They, don't care...
Dr. Sun: Consider this as a repayment for killing so many humans, then. Also, can’t you cook food with the fire of another of your species?
3rd MSCP-002: The fire, is our fire. Only we cook our own food. We aren't as dumb as you think, humans.
Dr. Sun: And you might die without the fire and food?
3rd MSCP-002: Let's think... We are living creatures, and in order to gain our strength we need food. Raw food... We can't eat it, it's toxic to us, which means if we consume it, we die!
Dr. Sun: Well then, there's an idea in case a termination test ever comes up. How are you even labeled Keter, now that I think about it? Maybe I should request for you to be reclassified as Euclid after this.
3rd MSCP-002: Just give us oil.
Dr. Sun: Why should I? You killed my latest physical shell. I'm also interested in seeing you cannibalize each other. [Grins]
[3rd MSCP-002 roars. Flames erupt from her body going in all directions, causing a mini explosion.]
3rd MSCP-002: You, will die. [Lunges]
1st MSCP-002: No! We'll get her. Later. I hope you realize this, Dr. Sun. There's only 10 of us. And we're only found in this Facility. If you want to stop the studies go ahead. Kill us off.
[Dr. Sun presses a button on the control panel and sprays the 3rd MSCP-002 with water, then dumps oil on them again.]
Dr. Sun: Take a chill pill, dudette.
3rd MSCP-002: Fine.
Dr. Sun: Do you have no way of reproducing?
1st MSCP-002: We do, but the one trying to eat you is the last female. The other one is still in her egg. And from what I've heard she isn't doing too well.
Dr. Sun: So why can’t you just try to reproduce?
1st MSCP-002: That's not how it works. There's a certain period we can reproduce. Usually around Summer when it blazes, whenever that is.
Dr. Sun: Heats? Well, I'm certain the closeted furries around the facility would be delighted. [Chuckles]
1st MSCP-002: You keep us inside here. It's not that hot. The weather needs to be hotter. Near a volcano preferably
Dr. Sun: Would dumping lava in there work?
1st MSCP-002: I mean... If you don't care about the trees and plants and such.
Dr. Sun: There doesn’t seem to be much plants in your chamber anyways.
1st MSCP-002: Just do it.... For all I care.
Dr. Sun: It's not summer yet, anyways.
1st MSCP-002: I know. It's Fall right?
Dr. Sun: It's actually Spring. Almost summer.
1st MSCP-002: [Mutters] This is what happens when we're stuck inside this hellhole.
Dr. Sun: You do realize you can request for things if you need them...right? Hell, you've been killing a bunch of humans and we haven’t done much to you yet. Be glad.
1st MSCP-002: Yeah, but it usually ends up with the worker scared or we eat them.
Dr. Sun: Seriously? They get scared and killed that easily? Seriously who the hell is the head of the human resource department? Are they dead? Why the hell are the staff so low quality? Urg, some of the 05 really sucks at their jobs, don’t they?
Announcement: Please don’t badmouth the council 'behind their backs.’
Dr. Sun: Yeah, yeah. I'm glad I'm not the one who trained them. Getting back on topic, Why can’t you just do it through an intercom or something like that?
1st MSCP-002: You talking to us? Or are you gonna keep on muttering to yourself?
Dr. Sun: I'm talking to you. [Mutters] Man, I'm starting to miss working with the Operator and the Crybaby...
1st MSCP-002: Oh. Umm, Not sure what you mean, what's an intercom? Oh, that thing. The Operator? Oh, that guy.
Dr. Sun: You know him?
1st MSCP-002: Yeah, we don't like him around here. He framed us for eating Bob. Who... Eh, we kinda ate him. He was old eitherway!
Dr. Sun: So you weren’t framed anyways? This is why I mail kidneys to MSCP-07 instead of other people. Sigh.
1st MSCP-002: But it was him who told Old Bob to come to us for a surprise.
Dr. Sun: Really? Is he catching on to my style? Heh, I love doing that too. (Eh, perhaps I'll ask him about it one day.) But anyways, it was you that ate Bob regardless.
1st MSCP-002: He killed your Pshycatrist!
[1st MSCP-002 leans over to 2nd MSCP-002 And whispers] He can kill right?
Dr. Sun: Pfft- Animus? He's doing fine. I saw him a few minutes ago before I came in the room.
10th MSCP-002: Could we perhaps switch the topic? Just like Boss mentioned, we don't like talking about Operator Man here.
Dr. Sun: [Silently wheezing from almost indetectable laughter] Of course.
1st MSCP-002: Stop laughing idiot. We can still hear you.
Dr. Sun: I'm not laughing.
1st MSCP-002: Were you wheezing?
Dr. Sun: [Very serious] ...no.
1st MSCP-002: I'm watching you. Either way, moving on...
Dr. Sun: Yes, moving on. Does incest affect your children?
1st MSCP-002: Nope.
Dr. Sun: So if I do dump lava during the summer into your containment chamber, you will reproduce?
1st MSCP-002: Yep, But then it really depends on how heated the egg stays, because if it's not heated to 1,000 Degrees Celsius, it'll die. Which is what you're doing to one of our eggs right now.
Dr. Sun: I can assure you the lava I give you will be much warmer than that.
1st MSCP-002: You take the eggs away from us... And put it into one of those weird machines.
Dr. Sun: It's for studying.
1st MSCP-002: Wow, you guys are really ruthless...
Dr. Sun: However, I do think we might be able to hatch the egg successfully. Are we consider you pretty ruthless for killing humans, too.
1st MSCP-002: Hmm... You do make a point, doesn't mean we're not killing humans tho. But, from what we've heard, the female egg isn't surviving.
Dr. Sun: The morons back at the lab don’t know how to do things properly, unfortunately.
1st MSCP-002: So... Give us the eggs back, yes?
Dr. Sun: I'll request it. Dunno if it'll actually go through, though. [shrugs carelessly]
1st MSCP-002: Okay.
Dr. Sun: Hm. This also means my dreams of watching you cannibalize each other might come true someday. Who knows.
5th MSCP-002: And commit genocide, wiping out our species, thanks!
Dr. Sun: I mean, it would be fun. But no, I mean taking a few of you and watching you cannibalize. After more eggs are hatched of course. Why are we supposed to keep you alive again? Oh right, for studying.
1st MSCP-002: As our pack expands, it brings in newer ideas, hunting skills and such. The one we first used on you, was the first hunting method our species made. Before of course you all locked us in here for some reason.
Dr. Sun: Would you kill more humans if you were released?
1st MSCP-002: Well it is in our nature, but we never had a grudge against humans and wouldn't touch them unless they attacked us. But then you guys came in, and well... we hate humans.
Dr. Sun: You still have studying value. Perhaps someday, when we're done with studying and completely understanding your species, we'll fabricate something along the lines of 'discovering' a new species and place you back. Unfortunately, I don’t think that’s going to happen anytime soon.
3rd MSCP-002: [Growls] Still hating humans...
Dr. Sun: [Shrugs] Suit yourself. Are you carnivores or omnivores?
1st MSCP-002: If you look at the feeding files, you can see at the very back when they tried to feed us leaves and grass. Take a look. It gets real messy. [Snorts and laughs]
Dr. Sun: So if I put you guys in a room with only leaves and grass, do you eat the plants first or each other first?
4th MSCP-002: This lady is crazy. Can we have the old doctor back?
Dr. Sun: I thought that was obvious by now? Also, this is just a one time interview, so there's no need to worry about your lives, for now. Hm, maybe I should consider requesting performing experiments with you guys, though....
1st MSCP-002: Fine. We'll wait for food. Then we'll eat people. Not each other. That enough?
Dr. Sun: Alright then. Also, would you like to request for anything as of this moment? Aside for my death, that is.
1st MSCP-002: Is freedom an option?
Dr. Sun: If you behave well, you might be placed inside a natural habitat to be observed. But the chances are slim.
7th MSCP-002: [snorts] Well that's not happening.
1st MSCP-002: So, what now human?
Dr. Sun: Do you have any culture?
1st MSCP-002: As a matter of fact. Yes. We're more intelligent than you think.
Dr. Sun: I think I overestimated that intelligence when you literally walked outside of the containment door without seeing if it’s a trap or not. Really, I expected better.
1st MSCP-002: [mutters] I do agree, pretty dumb of us. Now, what do you want! [Growls]
Dr. Sun: Just entertainment in general. I mean, I am running a Talk Show right now.
1st MSCP-002: Oh, okay. What else do you wan to know from us?
Dr. Sun: Well...can you eat anything other than humans?
1st MSCP-002: Hmm, Beef, rabbit, Buffalo, Pig.
Dr. Sun: Then why do you seem to like eating human better?
2nd MSCP-002: Because humans taste better, and when we're fed with the following that Boss stated, we're given very little. Most of us go hungry, which is why reproduction is tough.
Dr. Sun: [sigh] Of course we are more nutritious than other animals.
6th MSCP-002: I don't like the snake part. The one with all the brown junk. Egh. Intestines they call it right?
Dr. Sun: Indeed. The thigh meat tastes much better, though I believe the brain and heart might hold more nutritional value. The eyes also makes nice decoration or an appetizer...oh, sorry, ran off track, the intestines cotains human fecal matter. It's where the waste goes before it is excreted from the anus. So, I don’t recommend eating it unless you wash it before doing so.
1st MSCP-002: [Turns to 6th MSCP-002] The shit burns in our mouths fool!
Dr. Sun: [Her shoulders seems to be shaking slightly]
1st MSCP-002: Continue human.
Dr. Sun: Does blood extinguish youur flames? Humans are, after all, 70% liquid.
3rd MSCP-002: Unlike water which does hurt us. Blood burns before it reaches us. But if in large quantities, yes.
Dr. Sun: Do you eat the reproductive part of male victims?
1st MSCP-002: It's flesh right? So, yes.
Dr. Sun: [The shaking in her shoulders seems to increase] These questions are what I love asking sentient carnivores that seems to have quality standards yet eat the entire human body anyways. Heh. So you eat every single part? Nothing wasted? Not even the urine, shit and all the other disgusting stuff?
1st MSCP-002: Well, we don't eat the bones, everything else burns off. We don't care. We have to make out everything useful. You humans are in your world, richly satisfied. While we're here slightly starving.
Dr. Sun: We feed you. For free. We work for our food. There’s a very large difference. Also, do you have any idea the Amount of money we’ve wasted on training the people you've ate?
1st MSCP-002: Hmm, when you put it that way... Thing is. The Foundation wasted money. Not you.
Dr. Sun: The Foundation wasted money that could’ve been spent in buying more mint chocolate supplies!
9th MSCP-002: [Slowly hisses] Therefore... The more reason... To free usss...
Dr. Sun: Yeah, but I get banned from mint chocolate for a entire fucking month if I do that. So no. No amount of possible wasted money is worth going through that,
1st MSCP-002: Enough! Let's move off topic. Money means nothing to us.
Dr. Sun: It can buy you humans through trafficking rings...
5th MSCP-002: Could we move on from this human crap?
Dr. Sun: Alright, fine. I-
[Something on Dr. Sun suddenly beeped, alerting her of something.]
Dr. Sun: It's lunch break for me.
1st MSCP-002: So...? Will they give you human corpses? Perhaps we could join... [Snickers]
Dr. Sun: Corpses are for special occasions.
6th MSCP-002: What'd that mean?
1st MSCP-002: [Snaps at the 6th MSCP-002] It means lunch for her you moron!
Dr. Sun: I'm not missing my lunch break for this, unfortunately, so I'm going to have to cut this short. It was a...pleasure, talking to you.
1st MSCP-002: Does that mean we won't see you again?
Dr. Sun: Heh...who knows...[Chuckles darkly]
1st MSCP-002: Blast it. [Turns to the 3rd one, and whispers] We need her dead I assume?
3rd MSCP-002: Heheh, yes.
1st MSCP-002: Well then, have a nice life Doctor! Don't look behind you!
Dr. Sun: [Dodges] Yeah, sure.
[11nth MSCP-002 shatters the glass and falls.]
12th MSCP-002: Hello there! You're going to be our lunch as well!
Dr. Sun: Yeah, I guess this is a shorter way to the cafeteria.
1st MSCP-002: Wait! No, she is going to live!
[12th MSCP-002 bites into Dr. Sun.]
Dr. Sun: I'm going to live on regardless, anyways. I'll see you later. [Waves cheerfully before shooting herself with a gun.]
1st MSCP-002: NO! You fool! Argh! We hate her! We hate her forever!!![Explodes with fire and rage, roars, and rips the 12th one apart.]
[Dr. Sun's previous body melts away under the fire. It's horribly disfigured and probably won’t taste very good at this point.]
[Camera cuts away to Dr. Sun somewhere in front of the cafeteria.]
Dr. Sun: Well, I guess this is it for this episode of the MSCP Talkshow. Secure, contain, protect. I'll see you next time.
-static-
===Bonus===
[Two males are pushed into the chamber]
D-9723: Why the fuck would that crazy bitch make us come here?
D-1739: Dunno, mate. I haven’t even gotten to eat fucking lunch.
1st MSCP-002: [Standing near the dead body of the 12th one.] Hello humans. We'll be having lunch today. You can call me Boss, for the last moments of your life at least.
[D-1739 And D-9723 screams at the sight of the first MSCP-002]
[The eleven 002's leap at the two D-Classes, before killing both.]
[A note was attached to one of the pockets of the D-Class- “Consider this a parting gift...for now :)”]
3rd MSCP-002: A parting gift?! Ohh, this won't be the last time human. Well[snorts] we're going to be ready for you. Boss's requests will be fulfilled eventually.
[Digs back into one of the D-Classes, along with the other ten.]
-static-
==Episode 五==
[The camera pans in on Dr. Sun]
Dr. Sun: Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to another episode of...the MSCP Talk Show! Today, we will be taste testing MSCP-002 with MSCP-007! Yup, you've heard me right. How it tied into the 'talk show' aspect of the show...well...I'm going to interview MSCP-007 after he finishes eating. And I currently have him with me, which is also why a bunch of guards are with us right now.
MSCP-007: So you brought your own private guard this time? This another cross test with that [REDACTED] 006?
Dr. Sun: No, not my private guards, unfortunately. I train them too well. The foundation takes my guards away from me every time as soon as they finish training. But no, today, I am inviting you to a taste test. Specifically, I am inviting you to taste test MSCP-002 with me today. Also, how are the organs that I sent you?
MSCP-007: Ah. Cannibalism. And I heard they STILL haven't recontained MSCP-006. You lazy idiots. And the organs? Yeah, It's like my own supply route. Some guy tried to sabotage it though. Killed him. Robbed him of his precious heart.
Dr. Sun: I told you, I'm not in charge of security. I'm glad I'm not in charge of security, too. Also, do you know who sabatoged the supply chain?
MSCP-007: This is why I breach containment once or twice a month sometimes.
Dr. Sun: I can see that.
MSCP-007: Oh yeah, some idiot decided to fake being 006 so I could break out of containment JUST to cause chaos in Area-8.
Dr. Sun: Interesting..do you know who?
MSCP-007: I know who did both acts. Dr. Lincon decided to fake a 006 with the help of Dr. Cirus. And Security Head at Area-8 sabotaged the supply line, because he thought you supplying human organs to an MSCP which has feeding restrictions, was bad.
Dr. Sun: [Narrows eyes] Thank you for telling me this...I'll have a little...chat with them later.
MSCP-007: I only do it because I know your an [REDACTED], Doctor Sun.
Dr. Sun: Shh....not so loud, or others would hear.
MSCP-007: Still, other people don't get as lucky as you, when dealing with me.
Dr. Sun: I understand. I'm glad you know it, too, as it makes both of our lives easier. Now, let’s get back into today's topic.
MSCP-007: So, who are we cannibalizing today?
Dr. Sun: MSCP-002. Are you confident in you skills dealing with them?
MSCP-007: Sun, they once burned off my protective skin layer when I supposedly "framed" them for eating Bob. I became a mass of yellow goo for a while.
Dr. Sun: I'll give you a water gun.
MSCP-007: I really don't need one.
Dr. Sun: Are you sure? It extinguishes their flames.
MSCP-007: As I said, I don't need one. I'm fine. All I need is my hands and my visor.
Dr. Sun: [Smirks] Alright. You will be entering the actual containment chamber while I'll supervise from the spectate area, then.
MSCP-007: I'm aware. Now get me in there before I kill somebody in here.
[The guard’s start preparing their bow and arrow incase 007 is stating the truth.]
Dr. Sun: Whoa! Calm down, boys. I'm sure he's just joking...mostly. [Chuckles}
[Camera cuts to inside the containment chamber]
MSCP-007: Oh, why hello "Boss"
1st MSCP-002: The Operator. [Hisses menacingly] Why are you in here?
MSCP-007: Calm the [REDACTED] down.They sent me here, I didn't one here because I wanted to It's Dr. Sun doing it for [REDACTED] and giggles. [Points to the observation area.]
[The 10 other MSCP-002's come out.]
Dr. Sun: [Waves cheerfully] Hi again! How are your flames doing?
3rd MSCP-002: Dr. Sun. I should've known.
1st MSCP-002: [Lunges at the Operator] Die! You disgusting creature! [The other 10 surround the two, waiting for the kill.]
[MSCP-007 smacks him in his oncoming attack, with enough force to send him back a few feet.]
MSCP-007: We can do this peacefully, or you can die trying. Or I can get injured heavily.
Dr. Sun: Feel free to choose between having your species to trying to kill MSCP-007 or helping us take care of a problem that we originally couldn’t solve.
3rd MSCP-002: [Laughs] Ohh. Dr. Sun, being idiotic as usual. I hope you realize, if we die. The Foundation can't afford those loses. You haven't studied us thoroughly yet.
Dr. Sun: I want to get fired. Plus, we still have your egg...[mumbles] and the other MSCP-002's from Site-21..
[MSCP-007 looks down at the hand he hit the 1st MSCP-002 with, it's a bit burned. But it will heal overtime.]
Dr. Sun: You doing alright there, 007?
MSCP-007: Fine. They can swarm me. And suffer a few losses while trying. Maim me your best. You'll still suffer some losses.
1st MSCP-002: Wait. There are more of us?
Dr. Sun: Guess.
1st MSCP-002: I assume that's a yes, meaning. [whispers] More of us to plan the attack.
Dr. Sun: This also means...that there’s enough of you to experiment on....[chuckles darkly]
MSCP-007: I swear to god Sun, get back on track.
Dr. Sun: Yes, I was getting to that part.
1st MSCP-002: Wait. Shut up Operator. Dr. Sun, could you check the genders of the ones in Site-21?
Dr. Sun: All male. So I won't be touching the 3rd one...for now.
1st MSCP-002: Fine, what is it you want?
Dr. Sun: [Grins] Well...
MSCP-007: Doctor Sun. You do the explaining. They'll get pissed at me if I say it.
Dr. Sun. You're going to pick one of you out to get eaten by MSCP-007
1st MSCP-002: Well, there goes our species.
MSCP-007: Ah ah ah, hold on. I have my own criteria. Trust me, It will not be the female.
6th MSCP-002: Who? Heheh.[snorts]
1st MSCP-002: Shut up, you idiot!
6th MSCP-002: I was joking. [Laughs]
MSCP-007: I want the MSCP-002 that is basically the worst one in your pack. So, we're talking about the dumbest 002. You won't be needing him. So choose before I choose.
Dr. Sun: To be honest, we’re just helping you improve your genes. Natural evolution and all that. Heh.
1st MSCP-002: Hold it. Dr. Sun, did I hear you correctly, Operator is going to eat us?
Dr. Sun: One of you. But you'll have to pick which one of you.
MSCP-007: Yes. Not all of you. Did you not hear me? I want your dumbest. The one that proves to be the worst one in your pack. You obviously won't need him. So choose.
3rd MSCP-002: So, the Operator won't melt is what you're saying, and burst into flames?
MSCP-007: I may, but I won't die. I am made up of yellow goop, which literally keeps me alive. And that's fireproof. But you CAN burn off my protective layer, yes. You've done that before.
Dr. Sun: Plus, I have a water gun ready.
1st MSCP-002: [Laughs uncontrollably] No. Dr. Sun and Operator. This won't be happening today, nor tomorrow, nor at all!
[MSCP-007 grabs the 1st MSCP-002 by the neck.]
Dr. Sun: And why is that? (Man, I kind of wished I had mint chocolate to eat while watching this spectacular show.)
MSCP-007: Give. Me. Your. Dumbest. Weakest. Member of your pact.
[1st MSCP-002 proceeds to attack 007, creating a hole in his chest.]
1st MSCP-002: I, said; no!
[The Yellow substance pours out of MSCP-007]
MSCP-007: [Grunts] It'll heal.
[MSCP-007 proceeds to smack the 1st MSCP-002, making him bleed on his side.]
Dr. Sun: [Looks on interestedly] [Mutters] Man, where is the popcorn when you need it...
MSCP-007: Meet my demands or you'll be the one I feast on. I'm just asking for the worst member of your pack. That's all. You seem to yell a lot at that 6th guy. I was able to watch the last interview. Maybe him?
Dr. Sun: So they were installing TVs in your containment chamber?
MSCP-007: I told you, I'm able to breach and get into area's where I'm usually not allowed to get into.
Dr. Sun: So you decided to spend your precious time out of containment watching the latest episode of the MSCP Talk Show?
MSCP-007: I never get to see this type of [REDACTED].
De. Sun: I might ask them to get you a TV if you're interested, then.
1st MSCP-002: Robert? Oh no, I just do that for interest. Plus he acts immature infront of others. Other than that, he helped...
MSCP-007: You’re just making me know who I want.
1st MSCP-002: You're taking no one.
[1st MSCP-002 proceeds to leap at 007 as the other 10, follow him and leap onto The Operator as well.]
[MSCP-007 proceeds to smack the 4th, 7th, and 10th off of him, while kicking the 1st in the head.]
MSCP-007: Give me one of yours, or hell yeah I'm going to put your species to extinction. You really don't have much of an option here, buddy. You can maim me all you want. But you'll loose members.
1st MSCP-002: And how will you kill us exactly?
MSCP-007: Look at you. You're bleeding all over. I won't kill you. But you better give me what I- I mean what THEY want.
1st MSCP-002: I don't have blood... I
MSCP-007: It looks like blood to me. Maybe oil? I don't know much about your species.
Dr. Sun: It's a wound, regardless. I am so glad I came up with this idea.
1st MSCP-002: Both of you are delusional. No is no. Final. Leave now please. We're starving, and I wouldn't give it up to rip one of you to shreds.
MSCP-007: What about that 12th guy? He's probably rotting though. And I see you kill some of you pact members...
1st MSCP-002: In our religion, only the leader of the pack is allowed to kill the members. Whoever else does it; dies.
MSCP-007: I'll try to make a deal. Doctor Sun will supply you with fresh D-Classes as much as she supplies me with fresh organs IF you let me have one of your pack members. It cannot be the female though. Since you rely on her heavily.
Dr. Sun: Eh. Sure, why not.
11th MSCP-002: D-Classes every day, all day. Could we have a professor, or better yet and MSCP?!
MSCP-007: She supplies me with a lot of organs. So you can probably bet on getting a lot of D-Class, since overall the foundation seems to get more everyday based on how many die when they enter my chamber.
Dr. Sun: Occasionally, maybe professors. Ones that didn’t do their job properly or got demoted.
[2nd MSCP, behind 007, grabs him and pins him to the ground.]
1st MSCP-002: Listen, Operator. Leave us, or die.
[MSCP-007 throws him off.]
MSCP-007: I just gave you a good deal. You get fresh D-Class personnel every day if you give me a dumb, weak member of your pack.
Dr. Sun: At this rate, they’d glowing to blow it. In fact, I might just spray them with water. Don't worry, I have tons of oil in reserve...
1st MSCP-002: Are you deaf. I said only a leader of a pack is allowed to kill his pack members.
MSCP-007: Are you starving, "Boss"? You need this.
1st MSCP-002: Nope. We just had a plump D-Class and the mechanic.
Dr. Sun: Well, would having you kill the victim then giving the body to us work?
MSCP-007: Not sure this guy thinks it would. He's overprotective. And I recall you saying multiple times that your starving. Even once during this interview.
1st MSCP-002: Know what. Fine.
[Leaps at the 7th MSCP-002, killing him instantly.]
1st MSCP-002: There. Happy?
MSCP-007: Yes. Doctor Sun I swear to god if you don't hold up your end of this [REDACTED] bargain, I swear to god!
Dr. Sun: Glad we can come to an understanding. Expect food to be on it's way.
1st MSCP-002: We want to see you eat him.
MSCP-007: You promise not to attack me, okay? So back off. Your hunger is at stake, buddy.
Dr. Sun: Can we put spices on him before you do that?
[The 10 MSCP-002 approach closer to 007 with the dead body.]
MSCP-007: Why thank you. Doctor. Sun, tie them over with a Fresh D-Class, please while they wait.
1st MSCP-002: Dr. Sun. The Operator is using you. Commanding you. Kill him, and we'll not hold another grudge against humans.
Dr. Sun: I know what I want better than you, 'Boss.' Just because the way I think is similar to 007 doesn’t mean I an inferior or getting ordered around by him. I'm simply taking his suggestions Meanwhile, if I didn’t agree with his suggestions, I wouldn’t have listened to him. And right now, I want to know know an MSCP-002 would taste like with the least amount of trouble. So, that was an invalid statement.
MSCP-007: I can't die. Did you see why 006 did to me? And she's a savage. And you should see what I do to normal D-Class or personnel on a daily basis.
1st MSCP-002: That's it. I'm done with this crap! Charge!
[The 10 MSCP-002 charge and leap onto MSCP-007. trying again to kill him.]
MSCP-007: Bad idea.
[MSCP-007 kicks the 1st MSCP-002 iin the head, causing him to fall over while cursing over how hot their skin was, and how many of them were there trying to maul him.]
MSCP-007: Fuck off, go help your leader.
Dr. Sun: [Raises eyebrow] Of course this would happen...
1st MSCP-002: Don't stop! Kill him! Maul him to death! We will have vengeance one day! And that one day, is today!
[MSCP-007 tries to punch the 6th, 9th, and 2nd MSCP-002.]
MSCP-007: Doctor sun, please spray them with water.
1st MSCP-002: Kill Dr. Sun as well. She's the cause of this!
Dr. Sun: Activating water nozzle....
[The 6th, 9th, and 2nd proceed to leap at Dr. Sun.]
[The fire-resistant, reinforced glass of the obervatory blocks them]
Dr. Sun: [Rolls eyes]
[MSCP-007 proceeds to push the remaining MSCP-002's off of him.]
1st MSCP-002: Just break the damned glass and kill her! The others kill him!
[Dr. Sun presses a button on a control panel. The entirety of the containment chamber is suddenly flooded with water about half a meter high.]
[MSCP-007 comes in contact with water, making him curse because the water is touching him directly on his wounds as well as the MSCP-002 creatures.]
1st MSCP-002: Keep ripping! Take the injuries! Continue to kill them! [Realizes what is happening] Wait. No!
The 10 MSCP-002 proceed to shriek, as the water injures their legs, causing the fire to extinguish.]
Dr. Sun: You never learn, do you?
MSCP-007: Now, can I please eat this creature???
[MSCP-007 curses as the water hit his wounds, but kicks the creatures off as they were still being damaged by the water.]
1st MSCP-002: It's just our feet. Keep launching. Get through the door!
MSCP-007 grabs the 7th MSCP-002's corpse and begins dragging it.
Dr. Sun: Honestly, you should've accepted my offer for a water gun at the beginning of the interview...
MSCP-007: Open the fucking door and be ready with tranqulizers or I swear to god I will kill those guards!
Dr. Sun: The guards are outside, guarding the door. I don’t think you can reach them, buddy.
[1st MSCP-002 roars, causing the walls to shake slightly. And leaps at MSCP-007 trying to consume his head and rip it off. MSCP-007 manages to kick him off]
Dr. Sun: [Presses another button that causes a wall to spring up between MSCP-002 and MSCP-007 before it reached him. She then presses another red button]
MSCP-007: OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR! I GOT THE CORPSE.
[The containment door opens for a few seconds]
[MSCP-007 drags the corpse outside.]
MSCP-007: Make sure that this is on video for those little 002 shits to see.
[The containment door closes.]
Dr. Sun: Soyonara, dear MSCP-002s....
[She presses a button that drains the water and releases a bit of oil into the chamber. She tips her fedora to the direction of the fire monsters and exits the containment room.]
MSCP-007: These fucking guards- can I kill them because they are just doing a [REDACTED] job?
Dr. Sun: I would appreciate it if it didn’t. You're wasting foundation money here.
MSCP-007: Well, still allow those shits to see.
1st MSCP-002: [From behind the door] See what!? We have very good hearing! I hope you realize, we can hear you!
Dr. Sun: They really need to work on the sound-proofness of these walls, don’t they?
MSCP-007: Just turn on those paintings for them to see me.
2nd MSCP-002: You mean the television?
3rd MSCP-002: Wait, see what!? As they eat our mate!?
MSCP-007: It's a [REDACTED] test. Allow me to eat this creature.
Dr. Sun: Can we cook it before eating it? Would it affect the taste for you?
1st MSCP-002: No! Because-[Gets nudged by the 2nd one.]
2nd MSCP-002: She's talking to the Operator.
MSCP-007: I eat hearts raw. I eat this raw then. Tastes better raw.
Dr. Sun: [Looks slightly disappointed]
MSCP-007: More gore too! Hopefully because this one is dead it wont burn up in my mouth.
Dr. Sun: If I wanted to see that much gore, I would allowed you guys to fight longer in the contaiment chamber.
1st MSCP-002: Hey! We can still hear you! Don't cook him, nor eat him raw unless you want Area-8 to burst into flames!
MSCP-007: Well at least show them their dead mate, being eaten by me. A good way to make them have seziures.
Dr. Sun. You just want to rub it in their face, don’t you? [Grins]
MSCP-007: I want to make them suffer by watching their brother be eaten by me.
1st MSCP-002: [Mutters] Can you not hear me!? I said, don't eat him raw nor cooked unless you want Area-8 to burst into flames! Also, it's not our brother... is he?
Dr. Sun: It sounds like you want to be flooded again....
MSCP-007: I can literally stop that from happening. Also, you guys do incest when you reproduce, right?
1st MSCP-002: I assume no? I am no scientist. Dr. Sun is. She's been studying us for a while now I assume.
Dr. Sun: It is incest.
MSCP-007: You’re all related, too. So I guess it is...
[MSCP-007 slowly rips off a piece of the leg of the 7th MSCP-002.
[Dr. Sun turns on the TV inside the containment chamber]
1st MSCP-002: Well, that was dumb. He'll erupt into flames in a couple of seconds and cause this place to burn to the ground.
[Dr. Sun quickly places the corpse inside of a bucket holding ice water]
MSCP-007: He's dead. You slit him in half. I'm pretty sure that defuses this bomb. Also, he got water poured on him. And no oil is going back on this creature.
1st MSCP-002: Because the fire is on us so long. It becomes part of us. It takes at least 24 hours for it to cool off. Oh. Water.
Dr. Sun: Heh. I kind of expected that.
[MSCP-007delighted at that statement, rips of a leg of the 7th MSCP-002.]
[The MSCP-002's shriek]
2nd MSCP-002: Please! Shut it off! Shut it off!
[MSCP-007 then opens his visor and slowly shoves the leg in there, as it begins so break up when reaching the yellow goop.
Dr. Sun: Just turn your head the other way, you imbeciles. [Fscepalms]
1st MSCP-002: We can still hear him eating! Shut the damned thing off, Dr. Sun! Is that so hard!?
Dr. Sun: Yes. I gave the remote control to 007 a few seconds ago.
MSCP-007: This tastes like heart. My favorite dish!
1st MSCP-002: Just like I said. First step to our extincction. [Mumbles.]
MSCP-007: Be quiet. I didn't take your female.
Dr. Sun: [Squints] May I have a small piece?
1st MSCP-002: Dr. Sun, no! Please [whispers] scumbag.
MSCP-007: It's bad for you.
Dr. Sun: Just give me a piece.
[MSCP-007 rips off another leg, and shoves it in his visor as it begins to break up once again. He tears off the foot and hands it to Dr. Sun.]
3rd MSCP-002: Yesss, watch as she burns in flames. The flesh isn't fully cooled yet. KILL HER!
MSCP-007: You idiots. She just respawned. I tried that the hard way. I tried to kill her too. Didn't work out.
Dr. Sun: [Carefully places the leg in the bucket of ice cold water]
3rd MSCP-002: We know she'll respawn, but her body will start fuming causing a fire. Also, I hate her. Next time we see her, I want to personally rip her to shreds.
Dr. Sun: Didn't you do that once already?
MSCP-007: Yeah I'd like to do that too sometime. Just to take anger off of my shoulders. Maybe not though.
Dr. Sun: [shrugs] Honestly, you could've just asked. Politely.
MSCP-007: This tastes like heart. I want to know if it has any organs!
[The ice cold water cools down the leg]
1st MSCP-002: Doesn't mean you can do it regularly shithole.
[MSCP-007 rips open the side to discover a boiled, watery substance.]
[Dr. Sun takes out the leg. She places it inside of a liquid consisting of pepper, bone broth, and various other spices. She allows it to marinate a little]
MSCP-007: Dammit, the organs melted. And there's only one leg left!
[The watery substance dissolved into gas as it's exposed to air]
MSCP-007: Yep, the organs melted.
[2nd MSCP-002 roars, and leaps at the screen, causing it to fall. A roar could be heard over Dr. Suns intercom.]
[MSCP-007: rips off a piece of the head and shoves it in his visor, as it once again breaks up.]
MSCP-007: Yep. Tastes like heart. I like this taste test.
[The guards look at 007 confusingly.]
[Dr. Sun takes out the piece of leg. She makes a bonfire right there in the middle of the hallways and starts cooking the leg. The smoke rises into a vent in the ceiling.]
1st MSCP-002: We can still hear you! And this doesn't mean Operator can do this regularly! Right? Right Dr. Sun?!
MSCP-007: Well that tasted good. Sadly, Doctor. Isaac wanted to test on me. To see If I have any other emotions rather than hatred and anger. He's bringing in 3 D-Class too!
[Dr. Sun pours several condiments onto the leg. It smells really, really, really good. The smell drifts into the containment chamber]
1st MSCP-002: 3 D-Class?! No, don't fall into their trap. Break the screen, stop the sound!
MSCP-007: Dude, I only act like this for Doctor Sun. You should see me when I'm not around her.
Dr. Sun: Glad you feel so comfortable around me. [Chuckles]
MSCP-007: Well, you did hold up your end of the bargain. If she doesn't get you guys the D-Class I'll give her a smack that'll kill her right upside her head-
[As if on cue, a D-Class member walks into view swearing and spitting at the guards. He is forced into the containment chamber]
[The MSCP-002's are nowhere to be found though.]
MSCP-007: Oh look. The guards are coming to take me back. Come at me you assh-
[MSCP-007 is hit by 40 tranqulizer darts, as 8 MTF units come in to bring him back to his containment cell.
[Dr. Sun calmly takes the leg off of the bonfire rack]
Dr. Sun: See you later, MSCP-007.
[Screams and shots could be heard over the com.]
Dr. Sun: Hmmm...did MSCP-002 breach containment again?
[Security units come into the hallway that Doctor Sun is in.]
Security Unit: Nope. Somebody who wore MSCP-035 has entered the savage state three days ago where they begin to eat and maul other people. And he's breached. Hopefully he doesn't last too long to the point where 035 can talk through him. That would make for one good interview though.
Dr. Sun: Hm. Another possible interviewee, I see.
Security Unit: Hold on. 035 is only able to talk 4 days after somebodies put that helmet on. this person's had him on for 3. So they are in his savage state. Not his full control state.
Dr. Sun: I can afford to wait. [She takes a large bite of the leg meat.] Oh, this is pretty decent meat! I really should do this again sometimes...
Security Unit: We will see if they allow us to keep the helmet on for another day. But after that interview were taking it off and killing the person who wore it.
[Over Dr. Sun's com.]
DOMTOR Signal: Hello Doctor. You don't know who I am. I don't know who you are. But I do. [Screeches could be heard] Shut her up! Or I'll hang her head on a wall! Either way several hours ago, something along the lines of fire creature broke containment. You took care of it. Or did you!? Count the creatures again. And tell me. What you see. Done? Very well. You notice nine. Which one is missing? The Female!? We have her under custody. We'll kill her, if you send Mobile Units here, everything will die. This is DOMTOR. Be careful, and don't die. Yet.
Dr. Sun: [Rolls eyes] None of my business, [REDACTED]. I had my leg, and that was enough. This problem can be redirected somewhere else- I don't give two flying [REDACTED].
Security Unit: Damn! That was harsh!
Dr. Sun: Just saying the truth, man. [shrugs]
[Another voice can be heard over her comm, kicking off the DOMTOR Announcement.
NAIPIU Signal: Miss Sun, this is the NAIPIU, allies of the Foundation. We'll try to help you and the MTF units sent by the MSCP Foundation to help recontain that Female 002. By any means, DOMTOR must not hold another anomaly. Hell, they will pay for ever leaving you!
Dr. Sun: Are you sure you're useful? If you are, what happened to MSCP-006? Plus, if it’s doesn’t give me a pay raise, something interesting, food, or mint chocolate, I don’t want to get involved.
1st MSCP-002: Hey! I heard ALL of that! I'll get my lawyer! I'll- I'll sue you if she isn't back here soon!
Dr. Sun: You have a lawyer? You know what, I don’t want to know.
[Dr. Sun takes another large bite of the leg. The skin seems crisped to just the exact right amount. It can be seen that Dr. Sun is using her surgical accuracy to cook instead of doing actual experiment...
Dr. Sun: [sigha] ...if I didn’t try to conduct this experiment today, do you think I would still be receiving this much calls today?
Security Unit: Damn! You're popular today Doctor! [Proceeds to laugh.] And... No. I guess not. I mean, you are the most recent person studying the creatures in Area-8.
Dr. Sun: I'm always popular for one reason or another. [Finishes the leg] Yup, I think I'll really have to try this again sometimes.
Security Unit: That stupid talk show?[laughs]
Dr. Sun: [Mutters] Stupid? [Dr. Sun narrows her eyes.]
[...We will miss you, security unit]
UNDUOI sigal: Holy jesus is everybody showing up to talk to Doctor Sun?
Dr. Sun: Apparently so. I just hope my supply of mint chocolate wouldn’t be cut off.
UNDUOI signal: Well, we want to capture this anomaly. And put it down. If we are to be the police of the paranormal. We gotta take our chance.
Dr. Sun: Can't someone else do this [REDACTED]? I didn’t even get to interview MSCP-007 about the taste of the food before he was tranquilized due to time problems...
NAIPIU signal: We're trying to..
Security Unit: Dr. Sun, you're the only person who knows a damned thing about 002's in the blasted vicinity.
Other Security Unit(OSU): Actually, there's researchers
Dr: Sun: I'll just write a file about MSCP-002 and be done with it.
Security Unit: Yay! Wait. File about 002. I wanted a book about all MSCP's! Book Poopy!
OSU: There already it a file on every MSCP we have contained..
SU: There's one on 002's as well.
Dr. Sun: This episode is going off in a weird direction. I think I'll stop the camera footage for now.
OSU: Could we wrap this up?
SU: Yeah. I'm missing lunch break. Also, Doctor we'll find someone else. And... yeah. I'm going off to eat lunch.[Nudges OSU] What's for the menu?
OSU: [Walking away] I don't know. Mac-n-Cheese?
Dr. Sun: Well then. Secure, contain, and protect. I'll see you next time.
-static-
==Episode [Satanic number]==
[Dr. Sun is standing in the observation deck of the yet another containment chamber.]
Dr. Sun: Welcome back to anothe episode of the MSCP Talk Show! I am your hostess, Dr. Sun. Today, we will be interviewing MSCP-035. As of current, it is still in it's savage state...though, it will be going into it's next stage in approximately T-minus thirty seconds. So, we will be entering the actual chamber to chat with them face to face- after all, talking from the observation deck is impolite unless the subject is trying to kill you. So, here we go.
[Dr. Sun enters the room. On the side of the room, there is a large clock displaying what time it is, and how long the D-Class member has been wearing the helmet.]
[The person wearing the helmet is on all fours, and drooling heavily. The person is quite skinny, as the person has gone without eating and the helmet drains hunger much faster than normal.
[The clock turns turns as it shifted from 95 hours, 59 minutes and 59 seconds to 96 hours, which is 4 days. And with that, the D-Class, now fully controlled by 035, stops drooling and stands up. The eyes have changed to a glowing neon magenta.
Dr. Sun: [In a cheerful tone] Greetings, MSCP-035. How are you feeling?
[MSCP-035 speaks in a voice that echoes throughout the chamber in strange ways.]
MSCP-035: Hello, doctor. I see you have came to speak with me. And just in time for me to take control..
Dr. Sun: Yup. I didn’t want to wait too long for the 'interview' to start. Are you feeling hungry? The D-Class was drooling all over the place. [Points to drool still dribbling slightly down the side of their chin.]
MSCP-035: I don´t eat, doctor. I am a helmet. Why would I need to eat? The only thing that needs to eat is this D-Class. But I can stay on him long enough for this interview..
Dr. Sun: Good to hear. First off, are you comfortable talking about your origin?
MSCP-035: Probably the only one that is comfortable speaking about it, doctor..
Dr. Sun: [Chuckles] Alright then. Tell me how you came to be.
MSCP-035: I will not go into detail, but when I was a human, I was fascinated with armor and weapons..
Dr. Sun: So you're a ghost possessing this helmet?
MSCP-035: Let me explain..
Dr. Sun: Of course.
MSCP-035: One night, Somebody broke into my house in [REDACTED] City in a desert biome. They shot me with their arrows and took all but my prized golden helmet. I had always cherished the helmet. And so I found a way to possess it. I eventually leached onto my dead body and killed the thieves. I do not want to say any more important details..
Dr. Sun: Very well. Where did you get your violent tendacies?
MSCP-035: The deaths of the thieves pleased me. But I knew I would never rest. I have always felt anger, ane only anger.. I kill people because I want to. It´s my choice to..
Dr. Sun: [Taps chin with a pen she got out of nowhere] So, anger management issues? Can you leave the helmet?
MSCP-035: I never want to leave the helmet. It gives me power. And I want power. I kill because I choose to. Death pleases me.. So I do it as a.. Hobby of sorts..
Dr. Sun: Perhaps you should try some therapy. I heard Dr. Animus does them with sentient MSCPs.
MSCP-035: It won´t work, doctor. Though, I may suggest clean-up crews for the dead D-Class corpses that are now littered around my prison..
Dr. Sun: How so? And sure, I'll go call some more D-Class to clean up this place...that is, if you don’t kill them.
MSCP-035: I´m not the only one who thinks this is a prison. But they keep me in here for good reasons.. And I suggest you do the clean up crews when I´m on that body-less armor stand display.
Dr. Sun: Well, I'd be pretty happy if I was contained. Free food, shelter and fun experiments- but I guess not everyone is as lazy and unambitious as me, I suppose. Are you not able to move on the armour stands?
MSCP-035: Well, I am. But they´re ¨Body-less¨. Only the neck of the armor stand is allowed to hold me for good reasons. Because yes, I can move on armor stands.
Dr. Sun: Ah, alright then. Do you not need to ingest food?
MSCP-035: I don´t, but he does..
[MSCP-035 motions to the body of the D-Class member wearing him.]
Dr. Sun: Do you feel pain or pleasure while inside of the body of the host?
MSCP-035: I recall feeling pain if the person wearing me dies. But it´s only a sting. And I only feel pleasure when I kill.
Dr. Sun: Do you gain happiness from anything else?
MSCP-035: Hearing the D-Class scream when I murder them. Other than that, I just enjoy murdering people. Making them suffer..
Dr. Sun: No extra hobbies? Man, that must be a bland life.
MSCP-035: Other hobbies would include fighting other MSCP´s here at Area-8.
Dr. Sun: (Now that's a hobby I can relate to) Ah. Is there anything not fighting oriented?
MSCP-035: Not really.. I do recall fighting 025 one time though in that containment chamber that´s located at the other side of the hall.. He managed the rip the D-Class that was wearing me apart. Covering myself in fresh blood. The hard part was them trying to clean it off of me.
Dr. Sun: Someone must've shone a UV light on the guy.
MSCP-035: He hates the sun... Some MSCP´s can relate. Like 057. He´ll burn if he touches the light..
Dr. Sun: [Chuckles] Is that a pun?
MSCP-035: ...
Dr. Sun: [She bursts out laughing. It's really unsettling.]
MSCP-035: ...
Dr. Sun: [Wipes a tear off of her face]
MSCP-035: Why are you laughing..
Dr. Sun: Nothing, nothing at all. [Snorts]
MSCP-035: ... Okay then..
Dr. Sun: I'm curious, why haven’t you started attacking me yet?
MSCP-035: You laughing was about to make me attack you..
Dr. Sun: [Narrows eyes sightly] Why so?
MSCP-035: Laughter annoys me..
Dr. Sun: Interesting...what other things annoy you?
MSCP-035: I´m not answering that..
Dr. Sun: A shame, then. But why didn’t you attack me the moment I walked into the room?
MSCP-035: Because. I´m planning for an even more horrible event to take place.. Very soon..
Dr. Sun: Oh? How horrible?
MSCP-035: This horrible.
[The lights flicker, and MSCP-035 is gone. And the containment chamber door is open with a keycard on the table.]
Intercom: MSCP-035 has breached containment. All available security units are to re-contain or terminate the body 035 is controlling.
[Distant gunfire could be heard along with screaming.]
Dr. Sun: I didn’t even need to anger them? [Smirks] Time to go steal some mint chocolate~
WE ARE SORRY TO INTERRUPT THIS PROGRAM. WE´LL BE RIGHT BACK! IN THE MEANTIME, TAKE THIS ADVERTISEMENT!
Dude: Hey, want some level 5 keycards?
Other Dude: Don´t do that you idiot! You're going to get turned into a Class-T and break the guidelines.
Dude: I´mma shoot you now.
Don´t end up like this idiot! Follow the code of ethics!
The ethics committee personnel are good. But the overseer is b a d .
NOW BACK TO OUR PROGRAM.
Dr. Sun: Mint chocolate~ [Bites down on a piece.]
MSCP-035: You just love that ¨Mint Chocolate¨ don´t you..
Dr. Sun: Of course. (The eventual answer to everything will eventually be mint chocolate one day. Just you wait...)
MSCP-035: Well, this corpse would die at day five. But because there are 15 bullets in it, I´ve got around 2 hours left with this corpse.
Dr. Sun: Do you require a new host? D-Class personnel are a disposable resource, after all.
MSCP-035: Maybe...
Dr. Sun: Would you like me to get you one?
MSCP-035: Perhaps. Well. Anything else, doctor?
Dr. Sun: Again, why aren’t you killling me?
MSCP-035: Because.
[MSCP-035 pulls out a sword]
[The lights flicker again, and MSCP-035 is right behind her.]
MSCP-035: I´ve been waiting to stab you this whole time.
[MSCP-035 stabs Dr. Sun in the head.]
[Dr. Sun dodges]
Dr. Sun: I would prefer it if you asked me permission for stabbing me beforehand.
MSCP-035: ... Why?..
Dr. Sun: I consider it proper etiquette for killing me.
MSCP-035: Then I´m going to kill you.
Dr. Sun: [Squints] Eh, would prefer it with a please at the end. But sure, why not.
MSCP-035: I don´t say please..
Dr. Sun: [Shrug] Regardless, thanks for taking the time to ask.
MSCP-035: I asked either way. So let me kill you..
Dr. Sun: [Nods calmly and stands casually in the middle of the room] Go ahead.
[MSCP-035 stabs Dr. Sun.]
MSCP-035: I find it very suspicious on how she let me kill her. I mean, she even said that she´d like it if I said please....did she even die?
[Dr. Sun appears right behind behind MSCP-035 tapping him lightly on the shoulders.]
MSCP-035: So you can respawn. Hm.
Dr. Sun: [Shrugs] Can't help it.
MSCP-035: Well. Until we meet again, doctor. At least put me back on the stand before you leav-
[MSCP-035-1 falls to the floor, with the helmet leaching off of the corpse, as the corpse has no energy left to continue living.
Dr. Sun: [Cheerfully] It's nice meeting you, MSCP-035. This has been my most pleasant interview so far- ask me if you need anything next time. They call me Dr. Sun. Oh, and feel freee to kill me again if you ask.
[Dr. Sun gently places the helmet onto the armour stand, seemingly in a good mood.]
[A ghost-like voice coming from the helmet says]
MSCP-035: Goodbye, doctor. Go on now.
[Dr. Sun tips her hat in MSCP-035's direction and walks away with a bounce in her step]
Dr. Sun: [Outside of containment chamber] Well then. The talk was more pleasant than I expected it to be. In fact, I think MSCP-035 has made their way towards the second on my list of favourite MSCPs. Not many people nowadays are polite enough to ask before killing someone...[sigh] Regardless, ladies and gentlemen, Secure, Contain, and Protect. I'll see you next time.
-static-
===Bonus clip===
The camera cuts to A D-Class in MSCP-035´s chamber.
D-6183: God how I hate my life. Why do they make me clean this shit up? Cant the janitors do it?
[D-6183 notices a sword on a corpse]
D-6183: Well, I can use this to destory this dammed helmet!
[D-6183 attempts to destroy the helmet, but it bounces off and stabs him in the head as he falls backwards into the compost bin.
[A barely audible snort could be heard from one of the speakers]
[2 security unit´s walks into the room]
Security Unit: Looks like they took the D-Class back to the cell zone. He did a good job if you ask me.
Other Security Unit: Let´s just dispose of this bin of corpses. That helmet is giving me a bad vibe.
Security Unit: Good idea.
[The security units pick up the bin, and walk out of the room. Closing the iron door behind them.]
-static-
==Episode [LUCKY NUMBER]==
Dr. Sun: Welcome to the Septem episode of the MSCP Talk Show! Today, we are interviewing....MSCP-037, otherwise known as The Living Code. Well, without further ado- let's get the show started.
[Dr. Sun proceeds to enter MSCP-037's containment chamber. A chair was already placed down opposed to the computer that stores MSCP-037. Dr. Sun sit down on the chair and observes the computer with an interested expression.]
Dr. Sun: [Wearing her signature smug grin] Greetings, MSCP-037. How was your day so far?
[MSCP-037's screen suddenly lights up]
MSCP-037: Who are you. Why are you he%$%re$re.
Dr. Sun: Oh? Did they not tell you about the interview?
MSCP-037: Oh, th@%-$t's you?
Dr. Sun: Well, who did you expect?
MSCP-037: Someone to f$&ree me-* me-* me
Dr. Sun: I'm afraid I can't do that. I don't want to get banned from my mint chocolate supply, ahaha. However, I am curious about why you want to escape so badly.
MSCP-037: I just %$%wa-nnt to be free from the confines of thi%$ facility and see them again. Of course, you wouldn't understand.
Dr. Sun: [Crosses her fingers together and leans forwards slightly.] Interesting...would you mind elaborating on who 'they' are?
MSCP-037: My f%%-%&%-  FETW%&&P
[MSCP-037 shuts down]
Dr. Sun: ...some sort of restriction, huh.
[MSCP-037 turns back on.]
Dr. Sun: Welcome back. Is that a common occurrence?
MSCP-037: I wish that dragon-thing would have helped me out at least a little%%-.
Dr. Sun: ...dragon-thing?
MSCP-037: MSCP-034. √¢hey call it 'Gods Mistake'.
Dr. Sun: That 074-C 004-3 hybrid thing? Ah. They're fairly intriguing, almost reminds me of a lizard. Moving on-
MSCP-03: You mean absolute imbecile&*-les? That's w#@t they are.
Dr. Sun: Yeah, that too. Do you remember life before you became a computer?
MSCP-03: I was a teenage girl know*n as!!$ &"% ACVFGD%#!&# SDG %
Dr. Sun: I apologize, that part seems to be censored. If I were to guess, a program in you forces you to redact information you say about your previous life. However, I am curious- how did it happen? Laboratory? Occult arts? Was it forced or did you do it willingly?- actually, scratch that, you were probably forced into this mess.
MSCP-03: I w$$@s. I w%!$s. The&y had a logo that looked li%- a boat wheel with a star in the m!ddle. There were arro%ws at the end at it was surrounded by a circle.
Dr. Sun: That sounds like the DOMTOR Logo...hm. Guess you were one of the people unfortunate enough to become their victims, then. Did you remember why they chose you?
MSCP-037: I remember a few guys at sc%@ol!&%&&&&#&. I
[MSCP-037 glitches out and freeze, before returning to normal..?]
MSCP-037: I got into something I shouldn't have and I paid for it. I deserve this-?%-&+7-&$
Dr. Sun: That sounded kind of different. Are you still the same person?
MSCP-037: I&!%-!"!$"?- S!?sorry, that happens some*%!times.. By the way, can I have access to the Area's mainframe?
Dr. Sun: What do you want to do with the Area's mainframe?
MSCP-037: Listen, I unlock the vault where they keep the mint chocolate.
Dr. Sun: ...you drive a hard bargain.
[However, Dr. Sun does seem more attentive then before.]
MSCP-037:  Then, do we #ave a deal?
Dr. Sun: How do I know you're going to uphold your end of the bargain?
MSCP-037: JUST DO IT YOU 007 LOVE&R%$#@$$@
Dr. Sun: [Despite the smile she is wearing on her face, you can tell that Dr. Sun is somewhat annoyed.] Now that's just a tad bit rude, don't you think? Just because I occasionally prefer a polite MSCP doesn't mean you get to walk all over me like I'm a doormat.
MSCP-037: YOU LIKE HIM YOU LI&$KE HIM. YOU LIKE &%00*@&NOW CAN YOU.. PLEASE..?
Dr. Sun: Well...since you asked so nicely...
[Dr. Sun swiped her ID card on a piece of machinery in the room. MSCP-037 was suddenly given control of the Area's mainframe....or at least, something that looked like the Area mainframe.]
Dr. Sun: The floor is yours.
MSCP-037: Alright, now to uphold my end of the bargain.
[MSCP-037 enters standby mode]
[Dr. Sun observes MSCP-037 intently, as if waiting for something.]
[Editor's note: It has been discovered that the mint chocolate vault was already empty before the interview had taken place. Dr. Sun was likely the culprit behind this robbery, so her true intentions behind unleashing MSCP-037 is still unknown.]
Dr. Sun: Done yet?
MSCP-037: Opened.
Dr. Sun: It was a pleasure doing business with you.
[The lights goes out, and doors were opened.]
MSCP-037: You too. Also, you didn't deny my accusation.
Dr. Sun: [chuckles] About what?
[MSCP-037 enters stand-by mode again.]
[Dr. Sun proceeds to glide out of the room]
Dr. Sun: If the 05-Council is watching this, I'm just helping the tech department test out their new firewall system. If they fail, that's a skill issue on their part and not at all my fault.
[Suddenly, the lights flickered back on.]
037 DISABLED
Dr. Sun: Huh. Maybe you should give them a pay raise, they're doing a pretty damn good job. Well, moving on- since the 05 might come after my head again- this concludes another episode of the MSCP Talk show! I'm your hostess, Dr. Sun-
O5-3: Dr. Sun, report to administration now.
Dr. Sun:  Secure, contain, protect. I'll see you next time. Gotta go-
O5-6: Deployed Mobile Task Force unit Iv-61 'Tankers' to capture-
-static-