Short Scary Stories Volume 15

== Genie Does As You Wish ==
"The baked beans have got to be in here," I called out to my wife from the garage. We were going to make beans for Christmas last year but we never did, so at one point I chucked them a dusty old box in the garage. Just as I was about to give up, I found something better than beans: a genie lamp. Must be from the in-laws. I held back a sneeze as I wiped the dust off of it. As I did, purple smoke rushed out of the tip and before me appeared a ghostly figure: a purple genie! "Genie does as you wish," the genie said in a Indian accent. Huh, so genies are real. I would be shocked but I've seen weirder things. 
"Alright, I wish for some bea-- actually, I wish for a million dollars," I said. "Fair wish. However, I must warn I am no ordinary genie. For your wish to be granted you must kill a born individual close to you. You have one hour, or it will cost you an arm and a leg!" the genie said. "No way. You've gotta be a scammer," I said. "I don't appreciate the stereotype. Maybe this will put your mind at ease," the genie said, holding a million dollars in cash. I leaned closer and took a whiff. Sure smells real to me! "Alright, give me an hour. I have some relatives coming over for Thanksgiving dinner."
As my wife welcomed in Uncle Chunk and his wife Betty, I rushed over to the green bean casserole and sprinkled some roach poison on the left side. Thanksgiving dinner soon commenced. "I can't believe she's 6 weeks pregnant already. How does it feel you're gonna be a father?" Betty asked me. I zoned out, staring intently at the clock, each minute passing by feeling like an eternity. "Yo Mike, we're talkin' to yah!" Uncle Chunk chimed in. "Oh sorry, I just was thinking about a million dollars. Say, green bean casserole?" I said, scooping the left side of the green bean casserole and setting it on Uncle Chunk's plate. "Come on, dig in! It's so good it might just knock you out dead," I said.
Chunk took a big bite then pushed the plate away with his head hanging low. "I'm feeling green," he said before spraying Chunk bile all over the green bean casserole. Shoot, he threw up the poison! No way I can get a million dollars now. "I'll get a towel from the basement," my wife said. A horrible idea then hit me; I don't have to kill Chunk for that million dollars. With time running out, I followed my wife to the top of the basement steps and shoved her. She tumbled down like a bloated bowling ball and hit ground landing on her stomach. "Sorry, we can make another one!" I yelled. 
I dashed to the garage and rubbed the genie lamp. "Alright, I did it! I killed my unborn child. My uncle was too suborn to die, I said with shaky breath. "Pathetic human. I said you must kill a born individual," the genie said crossing his arms. "Oh, uhhh... Maybe there's time to finish off Uncle Chunk!" I said. "Time's up, human. That will cost you an arm and a leg!" Suddenly, my left arm and leg popped off my body like something from a cartoon. "Try to make another child and I will be reborn as your own. See you later, human!" the genie said before going back into the bottle.
Don't deal with genies.
== Jack Frost Vs. The Nutcracker ==
It was a cold Christmas night. A snowman named Jack awoke thanks to the spirit of Christmas delight. A chill in the wind sent a shiver down Jack's snowman spine. Christmas lights glimmered in Jack's chestnut eyes. "Nothing can ruin this beautiful Christmas night," Jack said, with not a Nutcracker in sight. Until he was. Out from the gingerbread house scurried like a mouse: The Nutcracker made himself known without a sound. Jack shivered in his metaphorical boots, his cold heart beating loud. The Nutcracker tiptoed across the snow, Jack shaking in fear like a snow globe. Jack's arms were too short to cover his chestnuts, and he had no wings to fly away like a red dove. The Nutcracker inched closer, his feet dragging through the snow like a bulldozer. Jack prepared for the worst, weeping for his chest nuts about to hurt. The Nutcracker lunged toward, chomping his denchers on Jack's nuts like a terrible boar. Jack screamed with the force of a thousand elves, as his nuts contorted with pain worse than hell. The Nutcracker chomped with mighty bite, Jack wishing he could just melt and die. The Nutcracker released with a finishing crunch, Jack whimpering, mourning the loss of his nuts. The Nutcracker chattered with glee, returning to his gingerbread house after fulfilling his Christmas need. Jack awaited the morning sun, hoping for its warmth to reduce him to dust. "Whoever put chestnuts on me is a mean one," Jack said, not having fun.
Merry Christmas to all on this snowy night, let the spirit of Christmas fill your soul with delight. And remember -- don't put nuts on a Snowman with a Nutcracker near by -- he might be the victim of the Nutcracker's thirst for nuts and may die.