Narcissus (audio story)

was the fourth and final audio story in the anthology The Eighth of March. It was written by Sarah Grochala and featured Jemma Redgrave as Kate Stewart, Ingrid Oliver as Osgood, James Joyce as Josh Carter and Tracy Wiles as Jacqui McGee.
== Publisher's summary ==
When one of their own goes missing, Kate Stewart and the two Osgoods decide to investigate.
Narcissus is interested only in the most beautiful people, but as the UNIT operatives are about to discover, its true purpose is something far from desirable.
== Plot ==
After an enjoyable dinner, Josh kisses his date and, when she transforms into an alien, he flees into the sewers and tries to call Osgood. She is unavailable, however, and the alien captures him.
Kate tries to get Osgood and her double to stop arguing and sends the double to work from home. Double Osgood receives Josh's voicemail on the journey home and returns to UNIT HQ to show Kate and Osgood, who agree that it sounds like a device is being charged. Whilst one goes to try to identify the device, the other goes to Josh's flat and Kate contacts Jacqui about a spate of disappearances which she now believes could be connected.
The Osgood at Josh's flat finds his laptop and takes it back to HQ where the two of them find that he has been using the Narcissus dating service. They see that he had been in contact with Stargazer, a male user looking for a long lunch, and, after seeing that Jacqui also uses the site, Double Osgood takes Jacqui's form to meet him. Double Osgood meets Stargazer, actually called Jordan, and goes to his hotel room after dinner. He transforms into an alien and knocks her out. Jacqui, having realised that her account had been hacked and feigned memory loss to get the key, enters the room and is shocked to find her double unconscious on the floor.
Jacqui complains to Kate about her identity being stolen, although she is unaware of who it was that copied her form due to her not having clearance to know about Operation Double. Kate admonishes the two Osgoods for their recklessness and asks Double Osgood, who is badly hurt and in receipt of medical care, for a description of the creature; she tells her that it looked like a fiery bird. Kate calls Narcissus and is put in contact with Jordan Love, who insists on dealing with the matter of Stargazer's identity internally and, after the phone call, declines to answer a call from Jacqui asking for an interview.
Osgood tries to access Stargazer's account but is thwarted by sentient code, leading Kate to call Jordan back and claim that a computer virus is stealing data from Narcissus. Jordan once again says that he will deal with it internally and changes his mind about being interviewed by Jacqui. Jacqui meets with Jordan, who is now a woman, and asks her about the disappearances; Jordan brushes aside her concerns and attempts to seduce her before revealing her true self and knocking her out and taking her to her spaceship. She intends on putting her into suspended animation along with the missing persons, including Josh, to be used for energy. Jacqui is surrounded by mirrors and activates the alarm given to her by Kate.
Double Osgood is feeling better and has identified Jordan's true form as that of a firebird, a creature from mythology which takes the form of one's lost love before draining their youth. After Jacqui's alarm goes off, Kate and Osgood use Indigo to teleport to Jordan's ship to save her and Josh, leaving Double Osgood behind despite her insistence that she go due to her being replaceable. Kate is surrounded by mirrors and starts talking to herself about how strong, beautiful and brave she is. She manages to get free and releases everybody
Double Osgood tells Osgood to leave, but it is too late; Jordan finds her and attacks her, but it bounces back and kills Jordan. Osgood regroups with the others and thinks up a way to keep the ship's engine from overhearting and use the energy to boost Project Indigo and return everybody to Earth, although she is not certain that she will not simply blow everybody up. Osgood is upset by her belief that she defeated Jordan by virtue of being ugly, but Kate helps her realise that she was invulnerable because she does not need anybody to complete her. Knowing this, she enacts her plan and saves everyone.
Jacqui covers up the ordeal by claiming that the missing people had been found in a barn in Norfolk where they had been forced by Jordan to farm organic lettuces. Josh decides to stop using dating sites for now and to learn how to be happy by himself. Osgood apologises to Kate for her crisis of confidence and Kate tells her that Jordan was actually feeding on confidence as external beauty is subjective. Osgood is now getting on better with her double and admits that perhaps two Osgoods are indeed better than one.
== Cast ==
* Kate Stewart - Jemma Redgrave
* Osgood / Double Osgood - Ingrid Oliver
* Josh Carter - James Joyce
* Jacqui McGee / Double Jacqui McGee - Tracy Wiles
* Female-Jordan Love - Alix Dunmore
* Male-Jordan Love - Dan Blaskey
== Worldbuilding ==
* One of the Osgoods has a Gillesian Lassa virus on the go.
* One of the Osgoods was rewiring a Keptarian sonic blaster. They can be used against Keptarian razor bats.
* Kate says that she will have a word with the Beast of Bodmin.
* The Osgoods trace Josh's phone to Dean Street and Old Compton Street.
* Double Osgood has a parent.
* Osgood investigates Josh Carter's flat.
* Double Osgood eats crème brûlée.
* Felicity is Jordan's receptionist.
* HTML, CSS, JavaScript and PHP are programming languages.
* Jordan is a Lydercian.
* Kate and Osgood use Project Indigo.
== Notes ==
* This story reveals that it was the Zygon Osgood who was killed by Missy in Death in Heaven, and that the real Petronella Osgood survived.
* This is the first appearance of Bonnie in a Big Finish Production.
== Continuity ==
* Josh tells Jordan how he and Shindi survived an exploding tank. (AUDIO: The Dalek Transaction)
* UNIT have already lost one Osgood. (TV: Death in Heaven)
* Kate and Osgood use Project Indigo. (TV: The Stolen Earth)
* Jacqui mentions the Silence. (AUDIO: House of Silents, Square One, In Memory Alone)
* Osgood finds Shansheeth in the UNIT records. (TV: Death of the Doctor)
* Osgood mentions the last time she hacked Josh's laptop. (AUDIO: Silent Majority)
== External links ==
Category:The Eighth of March audio stories
Category:UNIT audio stories
Category:Stories set in London
Category:Stories set in the 2010s
Category:Stories that use Howard Carter's UNIT: The New Series theme