2012-07-19 A Puzzling Housewarming

Penguin says, "Eddie!! You have quite the little hideout here. Needs some decore but workable."
The Riddler shrugs a bit. "Does what I need it to, so I'm not in much of a position to complain!"
Penguin says, "Since you brought it up, what are you into these days?"
The Riddler chuckles, tipping his hat with a wry grin. "A bit of this, a bit of that, as the mood strikes me. Though the meteor shower last night did provide quite a bit of fun. Did you happen to get in on that, my feathered friend?"
Penguin says, "No sir. I can't say that I did."
Penguin pulls out a cellphone and hits speed dial. After only a moments wait he says, "Bossworth, pull the car around back. I may be a minute."
The man tuts, fixing the shorter man with a disappointed frown. "Pity. Would've thought a keen businessman such as yourself would've had plans six ways to Sunday for that lot - the, ah, boys in blue certainly had their hands full, at any rate." He gives a secretive wink. "Not that I'd know anything about that."
Penguin says, "Why normally I enjoy a nice collared shirt, I try to avoid those collars all the way around it."
Penguin chuckles. "Oh Eddie, the 'fun' we are going to have."
"I can only imagine, Oz," the Riddler laughs genially, giving his cane a festive twirl. "Glad to see you out and about for once. Mind if I stop by the Lounge in a few days? I can't be positive yet, but I might actually have a whiff of something that you're likely to find...very interesting."
Penguin spreads a wry grin across his face, "I'd be honored to have you. It's been too long." He walks glances about, his hands clasp behind his back. "We must get you some paintings in here. Maybe a throw rug right over there."
The Riddler snorts lightly, unable to suppress a faint, amused smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Oh yes, let me tell you," he drawls, stretching an arm out, "there's nothing more I enjoy than a nice Rembrandt in my foyer." His cane snaps up, tapping a bare section of the rock wall with a sharp, hollow clang. "Right about there, would you think?" Sarcasm at its finest.
"I think it would look better over there." Penguin indicates a section of wall with missing sheetrock. "You know, to 'hide' the bare spots."
A curl of his lip is all the Riddler cares to acknowledge this comment with, shaking a gloved finger admonishingly at the Penguin. "Well, now, I'm still getting settled, mind. Interior decorating will come shortly, I imagine." He giggles, glancing up at the ceiling. "Wonder who's putting on good sales this time of year. High Street, maybe?"
"Wah wah wah wah!" Penguin puffs on his cigarette. Realizing it is out, he pulls a small tin from his vest pocket, replaces the old smoke with a new one, and fires it up.
The Riddler regards the lit smoke with a raised brow, gesturing to the other side of the wide entry room. A few serviceable chairs have been set up in one corner, with the feel of a temporary setup, and between them rests a low, rickety table boasting an empty metal drum. "Have a seat, if you're visiting," Nigma quips, crossing to settle into one of the chairs. "Not what you're used to, I'm aware - nor what I'm used to, but still, must start somewhere."
Penguin nods absently and waddles slowly towards the seats. "Hopefully we can squeeze some juice from this city. I know there are some uppity types I would like to get rid of altogeher." The Penguin sets his umbrella against the wall next to him and takes a seat crossing his short legs ackwardly in front of him.
"You and me both, my friend," the Riddler mutters. "The city's still here - still as ripe as it ever was, though there are folks on all sides getting a bit too big for their britches, as the saying goes." He lets out a vexed sigh, ticking off on his fingers. "Batman and his obedient little catamites, law enforcement, organized crime - never mind our other acquaintances," he grunts. "Worse, I keep hearing that there are upstarts crawling out of the woodwork, begging to follow the Bat's example. What next?" He rolls his eyes.
Penguin rolls his cigarette holder back and forth between his teeth, "Anything that sounds Italian has to go." He pulls the holder from between his teeth and gingerly taps a long ash off. He visible shudders at the mention of Batman, "That one has to go too, and soon. He will ruin everything. I don't think the boy wonder would stand a chance if it weren't for his big brother bat swooping in to ruin things." As he says the last of this he clenches his fist and grits his teeth around the thin wooden cigarette holder. "I love birds, but I /hate/ Batman."
The Riddler smirks mirthlessly, eyes alight with a steel glint. "You took the words out of my mouth, Ozzie. One riddle I haven't been able to unravel myself - how does one remove an infestation of bats?" He glances at the fallen ash and extends a leg, scuffing at it with his foot and gesturing to the metal drum on the table with one thumb. "Though if you're coming back from...vacation," he grins, "you and I might be able to put our heads together, mm?"
Penguin turns and fixes his old friend with his monocled eye, "If I had a bat infestation, I would start by smoking them out. Once they were out in the open I would hire a two dozen guns to fill the skies with lead." He absently ashes in the bowl. "If that didn't work.. I would hire 4 dozen. Wah wah wah wah!"
White teeth flash in the dim room as the taller man shares his guest's mirth. "A sound idea, but it's been done! You can't catch the Batman, can't shoot him - no matter how prepared, he's too all-fired slippery." The Riddler slumps in his seat, chewing meditatively on his lower lip. "Unless..." He glances over to the Penguin, calculating. "Food for thought, I suppose. Bird food, at that," he snorts. "You go back to your Lounge, Ozzie, and remind your folks who's boss. Keep an open ear, as I know you love to do, and I'll pop around after I've...ah, sorted a few things."
Penguin pulls the cigarette from its holder and puts it out in the bowl. "Eddie, I can't wait to do this again. Next time at my place." He stands up from his seat, scoops up his umbrella and bows in grand fashion, "It has been a pleasure to see again." He turns and saunters towards the exit the metal tip of his umbrella clicking with every step.
Penguin pulls his cellphone out as he walks and says, "Bossworth I'm coming..." The rest is cut short as he leaves the room.
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