Mintberries and Marklars

Mintberries and Marklars: a South Park Space Adventure is a fanfiction published on FanFiction.net in April of 2022. Written by mr. petuski.
== Synopsis ==
Kyle, Stan, and Cartman join Bradley Biggle for an epic adventure to bring peace to the galaxy, but not all is as it seems. Kenny must join forces with Henrietta to find them. 
== Chapters ==
There are currently 5 chapters written of an anticipated 12 in total.
=== The Space Boy ===
Kyle, Stan, Kenny, and Cartman are walking to Cartman's house after school when they encounter Bradley who invites them on a space adventure.
=== The Ambassador ===
Bradley takes Kyle, Stan, and Cartman to his space station where they meet an ambassador from Marklar. 
=== The Poser ===
Kenny and Henrietta team up and make their way into space with the help of Elon Musk.
=== The Rescue ===
Kyle, Stan, and Cartman bicker while a team of three attempts a daring rescue.
=== The Crunch ===
Bradley has an epic fight while Kyle, Stan, and Cartman become separated. 
== Characters ==
=== Kyle ===
Kyle strives to complete his homework, but to do so, he'll first need to understand the true nature of the universe.Quotes:
"Cartman! Stop squatting like that when all you're wearing is a bath robe!"
"I swear to god! If we end up back in that cell after this, I will tear your balls off with my bare hands and shove them down your throat!"
"There's a bug on your shoulder."
"You don't think they would serve us actual shit, do you?"
=== Stan ===
Stan wants nothing more than to return to South Park, and not get swept up in a war, but he may need to push that aside to become a hero instead.Quotes:
"EW Cartman, why is this wet!?"
"So are you guys gonna torture us for information or something? We're getting really bored here."
"You know how these things go! We just keep getting deeper. Deeper into stupid crap like this!"
"What the... DUDE! GET YOUR HAND OUT OF MY PANTS!"
=== Cartman ===
Cartman has found a new thing to be obsessed with; innovation. His insights lead him to try new things, and become a douchebag in new ways.Quotes:
"Did you guys know that school suppresses the creative potential of your mind, and the secret to success is about being innovative and to pursue what you love from an early age?"
"You see, you are what us earth people like to call laaame. You like dressing up like you're about to go to an Indian wedding. You like showing off your little toys, and your little girl scout badges. And your idea of fun is spending a week in an Easter egg looking at dots on a black screen. WE on the other hand, are not lame, and we cannot survive your levels of lameness. You see, we're literally risking our lives right now because if we spend anymore time with you, we will literally die of boredom."
"You guys, did you know that squatting is a healthier and more efficient form of crapping? Japanese people shit like this all the time. It's part of why they're so innovative. I can crap like 500 times faster now."
"Screw you guys, I'm staying nya!"
=== Kenny ===
Kenny struggles with loneliness and strives to reunite with his friends, but he may need to suppress his lustful tendencies before this can happen.Quotes:
"Mph mph mmh mphs phph mph mphhmph hmph, mph phs mph mh Mmphmmphmphph mhmphmmph, mphs mphph mph mhmph phmphm mphph mph; mph mphphmph, mph phmm, mph mhs mphph, mph Mmphmphhmmsmph."
"MPH!"
"Mmphphs mpphmhmhh hmhmhsph!? Mphphmphh mpsmph mph mmphh! Mhmph phmphm mphph mph MMPHMPHSMPH! MPH MMMHHPHS MPHH MHHMPH! Mph mph hmhhphm? MPHHPMHHS MSPHMSPHMHH PHM MPHH! MPH MSPMHH MH MPH SMPHS MPH MHH MPHMPHMM!"
=== Bradley ===
Bradley believes very strongly in his brand of justice and moral virtue, also in his brand of cereal and related products. Quotes:
"Space; Just think, on all those shiny blue dots out there, those are the aggregate of all our joy and suffering, every being who is or ever was, billions of confident civilizations, every mom and dad, hopeful child, every lord and serf, every corrupt politician, every hero and evil doer. How frequent their misunderstandings, how fervent their hatreds, how eager they are to kill, all their imagined self-importance. Think now of the glory and triumph there would be in bringing order to even a fraction of these dots, and abolishing the endless cruelties visited by their inhabitants. How humbled they would be to see how small and meek their worlds truly were, and how the great might of justice could simply snap its fingers, and they would all cease to exist."
"I find your lack of brand loyalty disturbing."
"Ha ha ha. With the power of mint on my side, I become immune to berry based attacks!"
"Give the earthling his prize."
=== Henrietta ===
Henrietta wants to be left alone, but she'll need to learn to get along with a poser or two if she has any chance of retrieving a lost amulet she cherishes deeply.Quotes:
"You know what it's like to have a brother? It stinks. Twerps always stink."
"SHUT UP YOU MISERABLE DRIED UP CONFORMIST SKANK! GO OVERDOSE ON YOUR OXYCONTIN AND SPARE THE WORLD OF YOUR FASCIST NAGGING!"
"Your plan would have worked if the world could be depended on. The only thing the world can be depended on to do is to disappoint."
=== Other Characters ===
==== Elon Musk ====
Elon is desperate to appear cool again after receiving some negative publicity.Quotes:
"Hey guys, look, it's Seattle. You guys dare me to pull down my pants and press my ass against the window?"
"After this, do you guys want to try out some prototype brain implants?"
"So hey, what's your guys' twitters? Maybe we can do a follow for follow."
==== Lord Belfospoon ====
Belfospoon is the father of the Zarganor killed in the "Bring the Crunch" DLC, and now he's out for vengeance.Quotes:
"So these are the great Earth warriors? They don't look that tough."
"YOU KILLED MY SON, CRUNCH! NOW FACE ME SO I CAN GET MY REVENGE!"
"When I led my family to freedom, I wanted nothing more to do with you pathetic Gok'zarahans!"
==== *click*Ot'inu~ch'*click**click*m'obin' ====
*click*Ot'inu~ch'*click**click*m'obin' is an Ethiopian of the Mursi'bongo tribe of the *click*Buna Plateau, west of the O'mo River.Quotes:
"Do not worry yourselves, my friends. Worry is the baboon bite from the uncertain future. But with some investment in the higher dimensions, you can know the future as you know the past, and those pesky baboons will not come to bite you anymore."
"Go there with the speed of the buffalo running from the badger who wishes to bite at his prune sack!"
"OH' *CLICK**CLICK* AY'I;BI^PAF*CLICK*ZU`I'!"
==== Marklar ====
Marklar is a Marklar from the planet Marklar.Quotes:
"I've got this marklar. Now you marklar go to the marklars and rescue the marklars!"
"...Shabla-marklar?"
"Marklar had to check if you marklared in your marklar!"
== Objects ==
There are several objects mentioned that have importance to the characters and the story. These include:
====== Cartman's hoverboard ======
This self-balancing scooter is Cartman's newest toy, and not something he is willing to part with easily. He prefers to squat while riding it.
====== The Super-Crunch-Action-Automated-Answer-Minter ======
This is an advanced piece of alien technology which Bradley offers the boys once they reach his home world of K'oh Kajan. Bradley claims it can do all their homework for them.
====== Kenny's photos ======
Kenny has 3 photos which he always carries in his pocket:
* The first one is from the episode "Cancelled", and depicts two Joosian producers sucking eachother's jagons, and sticking their fingers in eachother's thrushers. While Kenny does not remember the origin of the photo, due to his memory being wiped at the end of that episode, he sees it as a good luck charm since he has died less frequently since discovering it.
* The second photo is from the episode "Pre-School", and features Cartman's butt made up to look like Stan's mom's boobs. It's just something he likes to look at when no one else is around. 
* The final photo is from "South Park: Post Covid", and features Kyle, Kenny, Cartman, and Stan making faces in a photo-booth. Despite it's dullness, it's the one which Kenny has the most sentimental attachment to.
====== Henrietta's amulet ======
Henrietta has had a satanic amulet since the 3rd grade which she believes to hold special powers. When it goes missing, She knows exactly who has stolen it, and she plans to stop at nothing to get it back.
====== Vehicles ======
* Mint-Berry tie fighters
* The Cyber Crest is a SpaceX prototype designed for interstellar travel. Its name and appearance is based on a combination of the Tesla Cybertruck, and the Razor Crest from Mandolorian.
* Flying saucers
====== Weapons ======
* Gift shop flamethrower
* The Spoon of Ursa
* Shotel lightsabers 
== Trivia ==
The game "Mintberry Quest" is based off of "Chex Quest"
Bradley's space speech is based off of Carl Sagan's Pale Blue Dot with a little bit of Thanos thrown in.
Category:Fanfics Dealing with Comedy
Category:Fanfics Dealing with Action/Adventure
Category:Fanfiction
Category:Fanfiction Dealing with Drama
Category:Fanfics Dealing with Science Fiction