Downtown

Downtown is an extended-length special by Then bends. In this special, Lightbulb discovers the wonders of inserting her tentacle penis in a waffle iron until it’s purple, bloody, and toasted, and tries to spread her ideas to everyone at Hotel OJ!
==Transcript==
*[Shot of a “Waffle House” at night. Lightbulb has snuck in.]
*Lightbulb: Hey, viewers! Someone on “Tumblr” requested “Cock flattening,” so I’ve decided to do just that!
*[Lightbulb goes into the cooking area.]
*Lightbulb: Now where does this place keep their waffle irons…
*[Lightbulb looks around for awhile.]
*Lightbulb: Haha, yes!
*[Lightbulb grabs the waffle iron.]
*Lightbulb: Score!
*[Lightbulb plugs it in and whips her tentacle penis out.]
*Lightbulb: Well, here goes nothing!
*[Lightbulb lifts the waffle iron, and sticks her penis inside of it, before closing it.]
*Lightbulb: OWWWWWWHOTHOTOHOTOHOHOT..hot…hot…hot….OOOOOOHHH YEEEAHHHH!!!! This feels amazing…MMMMmmmmmh~....OH…..
*[Lightbulb lifts the waffle iron open and takes her tentacle penis out, which is now purple and bloody.]
*Lightbulb: Oh~...it feels so WRONG! But it feels so good!
*[Lightbulb limps to a counter where she finds syrup, and lathers it all over her tentacle dick.]
*Lightbulb: Late night snack!
*[Lightbulb starts eating her bloody penis. Not “bloody” in a British way, in a descriptive way.]
*Narrator: Later…
*[Cut to Hotel OJ. Everything is in order, at least… it SEEMS that way.]
*Paper: Well, it seems that everything is in order!
*OJ: What could possibly go wrong?
*Lightbulb: Hey, Painty!
*Paintbrush: What, Lightbulb.
*Lightbulb: Come by the Waffle House tonight…
*Paintbrush: Why would I ever do that!
*Lightbulb: I have something cool to show you!
*Paintbrush: Well, alright! But it better be as cool as you’re hyping it up to be!
*Lightbulb: Trust me, it is!
*Narrator: Later…
*[Cut to Waffle House at night. Lightbulb and Paintbrush have snuck in afterhours.]
*Paintbrush: Uh, Lightbulb, I’m not sure about this. It’s kind of... creepy in here.
*Lightbulb: Relax, Painty!
*Paintbrush: I mean, how are we even gonna do… whatever this is? I don’t HAVE genitals.
*Lightbulb: Nothing an ancient spell can't fix!
*Paintbrush: W-what!
*[Lightbulb pulls a book called “Spells for Dummies.”]
*Paintbrush: Lightbulb?!? How the hell did you get a book like tha-
*Lightbulb: זהו כישוף עתיק. זה באמת! תאמין לי, גוגל תרגם את זה. אתה תהיה בהלם!
*Paintbrush: Are you sure this is safe?
*Lightbulb: As sure as I’m sure these Cheetos taste good!
*BSponge: CHEETOS. CHEETOS. CHEETOS.
*[BSponge dives into LightBulb’s hands and grabs the cheetos, causing the floor the crack under his bulbous mass.]
*Lightbulb: Ugh! I think I’m gonna be sick!
*[Lightbulb throws up.]
*Demon: What is it you require, mortal?
*Lightbulb: I need to give good ol’ (grabs Painty) Painty here one of these… (points to tentacle penis.)
*Demon: As you command.
*[And so,]
*Paintbrush: Whoa, this is... intense. I didn’t expect this.
*[Paintbrush smiles at their new little buddy.]
*Paintbrush: It looks so cute!
*Lightbulb: It’s beautiful!
*[Lightbulb bows down to Paintbrushes godly tentacle penis.]
*Paintbrush: Whoa, Lightbulb! It’s not the biggest deal in the world!
*Lightbulb: What do you mean? That’s MASSIVE!
*Paintbrush: Not what I meant.
*Lightbulb: Well, here’s what I wanted to show you!
*[Waffle Iron!]
*Paintbrush: Y-...YOU WANT ME TO STICK MY BRAND NEW, FLAWLESS TENTACLE DICK IN THAT? ARE YOU INSANE?! Actually no, that shouldn’t be a question, it should be a statement because YOU ARE INSANE!!!
*Lightbulb: Come on. Just give it a try.
*Paintbrush: And how will you convince me to?
*Lightbulb: I think it was a guy by the name of “Gabba Gabba!, Yo” who once said…
===Musical Number 1===
Lightbulb: 
Try it. You'll like it!
Try it. You'll like it!
Try it. You'll like it!
I know it's new, and you've never done it! 
You'll just have to trust in me!
Just give it a try!
Lightbulb and Test Tube:
Try it. You'll like it!
Try it. You'll like it!
Try it. You'll like it!
Try it. You're gonna like it!
Try it. You'll like it!
Try it. You'll like it!
Try it. You'll like it!
Try it. You'll like it!
I know it's new, and you've never done it! 
You'll just have to trust in me!
Just give it a try!
[Lightbulb gleefully lifts the waffle iron, as Paintbrush inserts their tentacle penis inside. Lightbulb proceeds to close the waffle iron.]
Paintbrush: 
OOOOWWWW!!OHOOOWOHOHOOHHOHHOTHOTHOTHOTOHTO….ooh….oh yeah…..OH YEAH…..WOOOH! WOOH-HOO!
I tried it, and now I like it!
Lightbulb, Test Tube and Paint Brush:
I like it! I like it!
I tried it, and now I like it!
I like it! I like it!
I tried it, and now I like it!
I like it! I like it!
I tried it, and now I like it!
*Lightbulb: See, Painty? I told you if you tried it, you'd like it.
*Test Tube: I know that that could have terrible consequences to your body in the long run but…ME NEXT!
*Lightbulb: Testy, you don’t have any testies!
*Test Tube: Not yet!
*[Test Tube pulls out a raygun.]
*Test Tube: A “Dick-inator!”
*[Camera pans left.]
*Ator: (eating a sandwich) What? Don’t look at me…
*[Back to Test Tube, who has now zapped a tentacle penis onto her.]
*Test Tube: Now, let me give it a shot!
*[Test Tube puts her dick in the waffle iron.]
*Test Tube: OHMYGOLLYGEEWHILIKESITHURTSITHURTSOSBAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaa….aaa...aaahhhh….geebweezer……..augh…….
*[Lightbulb and Paintbrush look at each other before high-fiving!]
*Test Tube: While this does feel good, I don’t think we should spread it any further. If we keep doing this, O-
*Lightbulb: “Light”..en up, Testy! What could go wrong?
*Paintbrush: WE GOTTA TELL EVERYONE AT HOTEL OJ!
*Lightbulb: (BFDI “Yeah!” sound effect)
*Test Tube: Oh, well. We can do it over a montage!
*Paintbrush: Test Tube, that’s the most overused fourth wall break joke in a cartoo-
===Montage===
*[Montage: Lightbulb and Paintbrush start telling everyone around Hotel OJ to follow them to Waffle House. First, Fan. Fan loves it! And so, they get Pickle, Trophy, Paper and even OJ to do it! They even clean out the Waffle Maker JUST for Soap! The montage ends with Bomb attempting to do it, and exploding the Waffle Maker.]
Petula Clark:
When you're alone and life is making you lonely, you can always go downtown. When you've got worries, all the noise and the hurry seems to help, I know, downtown. Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city, linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty. How can you lose? The lights are much brighter there, you can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares, so go downtown! Things will be great when you're downtown! No finer place for sure, downtown Everything's waiting for you! So go downtown! Where all the lights are bright, downtown! Waiting for you tonight, downtown! You're gonna be alright now, downtown! Downtown! Downtown! (Fading out…)
*Narrator: And so, after a successful campaign promoting the waffle iron, things seemed great. However, even if you are not ready for the pancakes, it cannot always be waffle iron.
*[Thunderstrike transition to a shot of Hotel OJ. We see Lightbulb waking up and immediately trying to jack off.]
*Lightbulb: What the? This can’t be happening! My sweet nectar… It’s not releasing anymore!
*[Lightbulb goes to the bathroom and desperately tries to get any sort of semen out of her penis, but nothing works.]
*Lightbulb: NO! NO! NO! That Waffle Iron… it’s destroyed my dick!
*Balloon: Your dick doesn’t work either?
*Lightbulb: HOW DID YOU GET INTO MY BATHROOM?!
*[Cut to Paper.]
*Paper: OJ, nothing’s working! I’ve tried everything! I’ve tried band-aids, ointment, even feces!
*OJ: That’s disgusting!
*[Pause.]
*OJ: I tried vomi-
*[Everyone is freaking out! Not sweet.]
*Fan: Maybe we just need to relax and it’ll fix itself?
*Salt: (smacks Fan) That’ll never work, Fan!
*Fan: HOW DO YOU EVEN HAVE A PENIS, YOU’RE A GIRL?!?
*Salt: Whoa, Fan! Lightbulb used one of her spells on me? You should know that. Or are you NOT the fan you advertise yourself as.
*Fan: I…
*Lightbulb: We need to figure out what went wrong! This wasn’t supposed to happen!
*[Cut to an alleyway with a building labeled “Cheap Doctor.”]
*Doctor: EVERYONE! CALM THE FUCK DOWN!
*[Pause.]
*Lightbulb: N-nobody said anythi-
*Doctor: I’ve reviewed your cases and after a throughout… whatever word Doctors say, It appears that you all have "Toasted-Penitis."
*Paper: What! Toasted-Penitis! That sounds like something out of a cartoon!
*Cheesy: (knee slap) Get it?
*Doctor: “Toasted-Penitis” is caused by thermal damage to genitalia. Symptoms include, pain, discoloration and sometimes, peni-cidal thoughts.
*Cheesy: (knee slap) Get it?
*Microphone: What do we do to treat this?
*Doctor: The only way to treat this is to… cut off your genitals.
*[BFDI Gasp.]
*Pickle: Amputate? There’s no way.
*Doctor: There’s yes way. Trust me, I’m the Doctor. I know what I’m talking about.
*[Shot of the alleyway.]
*Cheesy: (knee slap) Get it?
*Paintbrush: Oh, man! I’ve only had this little guy for [unspecified amount of time]!
*Cheesy: (knee slap) Get it?
*Nickel (to Lightbulb): What about you?
*Lightbulb: (suddenly breaks down sobbing) I DON’T KNOW!!!
*Test Tube: I told you not to do this! Remember?
*[Unnecessary flashback.]
*Test Tube: While this does feel good, I don’t think we should spread it any further.
*[Flashforward to now.]
*Yin-Yang: (Yin) So, what now?
*Lightbulb: Another musical sequence?
*Fan: Eh, why not.
===Musical Number 2===
*[Shot of a graveyard behind Hotel OJ. Each grave is labeled after a character's penis. The characters can be seen sitting on benches, some sobbing. Everything appears to be somewhat darker, and it is raining.]
*OJ: We gather here today not only to mourn the loss of our own selves but to reflect on the consequences of our actions. All it was meant to be… was a harmless exploration, a new experience that we thought would bring joy, oh so much joy to ourselves. But in our pursuit of novelty, we neglected the very essence of our own well-being… and to everyone who has been affected… know that you are not alone. We all made a mistake, and we are now paying the price.
[Jeffy Tweedy, I think.]
How to fight loneliness. Smile all the time. Shine your teeth 'til meaningless. Sharpen them with lies. and whatever's going down… will follow you around. That's how you fight loneliness. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do. Do, do-do.
*Lightbulb: I thought I was helping... I wanted to share something special with you guys! I never wanted it to end like this!
*OJ: What’s happened happens.
*[As everyone leaves the premises, Lightbulb stays, her eyes closed and she is silent. Cut to later. It is now night. Lightbulb is still sitting here, when Paintbrush comes by, with an umbrella.]
*Paintbrush: Lightbulb? Are you okay?
* Lightbulb: No, Painty... I'm not. I ruined everything. I hurt everyone... I don't know how to fix this…
* Paintbrush: Hey, it's not all your fault. We all went along with it! We all made the choice to try it. You can't blame yourself for everything.
* Lightbulb: But I started it! I pushed everyone into this. And now look at us... broken and... and... I can't live with this guilt, Painty…
* Paintbrush: Lightbulb, listen to me. We can get through this together. We can find a way to heal, to move on.
* Lightbulb: Do you really think there's a way out of this? That we can ever be okay again?
* Paintbrush: Yes, I do. But it starts with you forgiving yourself. We can find a way to make things better. Together.
* [Lightbulb contemplates what Paintbrush says. For awhile.]
* Lightbulb: I'm sorry, Painty... I just can't…
* [Lightbulb walks away.]
* Paintbrush: Lightbulb? What are you doing!?
* Lightbulb: (smiling) Thank you for trying to help, Painty. But some things... some things can't be fixed.
* [Lightbulb pulls out a gun.]
* Paintbrush: Lightbulb, DON’T DO THI-
* [BANG! Pause.]
* Paintbrush: Lightbulb…
* [Pause. Overhead shot of Paintbrush standing next to Lightbulb’s dead body.]
* Narrator: In the end, not every wound can be healed. Not every mistake can be undone. And sometimes, the weight of our actions is too much to bear alone.
* [End.]
== Wait. There's More? What the Fuck! ==
* [Heaven.]
* Lightbulb: Where am I?
* God: Welcome to heaven. You were an alright, if mentally deranged little lady. Welcome in!
* [Lightbulb goes into heaven.]
* Mama Luigi: L…Lightbulb?
* [“Bicycle Race by Queen” begins to play.]
* Lightbulb: Mama Luigi?
* Mama Luigi: LIGHTBULB!
* Lightbulb: MAMA LUIGI!!!
* [The two hug.]
* Mama Luigi: Oh, Lightbulb! I’ve missed you so much!
* Lightbulb: Me too! But there’s one thing I’ve always wanted to do.
* Mama Luigi: What’s that?
* Lightbulb: All I wanna do is…
=== Musical Number 3 ===
* [Shots of Lightbulb and Mama Luigi racing each other on their bikes.]
Freddie Mercury:
Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle! I want to ride my bicycle, bicycle, bicycle! I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike! I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bicycle, races are coming your way, So forget all your duties, oh yeah! Fat bottomed girls, they'll be riding today. So look out for those beauties, oh yeah! On your marks, get set, go! Bicycle race, bicycle race, bicycle race! Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle! I want to ride my bicycle, bicycle, bicycle, bicycle, bicycle race!
* [Cut to Black. The American Dad Credits begin to play.]
* Security Guard: Bye, have a great time!
* [Fuzzy Door Productions.]
* Guy in Gracie Films Logo: SHUT THE FUCK UP!
* [And now the show is over now!]
* [20th Century Fox!]
==References==
*The title of this special and usage of the track "Downtown" by Petula Clark is a reference to the "American Dad!" episode of the same name which uses the same song.
*The plot of this special is a reference to a real pornographic image of Lightbulb sticking her dick into a waffle iron. (I'm not fucking linking that.)
**"Waffle House" being the location used to do said action throughout the special is also a reference to a quote stated in the original Tumblr post, being "down at da waffle house"
**The characters having Tentacle Penises is also reminiscent of the many pornographic works made of Object Shows, not just this specific image. Don't ask how bends knows this.
*Characters and locations from "Inanimate Insanity" are used throughout the special.
*Lightbulb stating "Haha, yes!" is a reference to famous YouTuber "Kracc bacc."
*Lightbulb saying "It feels so WRONG! But it feels so good!" is a reminiscent of a line in an episode of SpongeBob SquarePants's third season, the episode in question being "Nasty Patty."
*The book Lightbulb pulls out being called "Spells for Dummies" is a reference to the book series "For Dummies."
**There is also a book in the series which is on the same topic.
*BSponge eating Cheetos and being fat is a reference to his real life appearance and activities, which include eating Cheetos and Playing Fortnite.
*The song "Try It, You'll Like It" is a modified version of a song with the same name used in "Yo Gabba Gabba!"
*The "BFDI “Yeah!” sound effect" is a recurring sound in another Object Show, Battle for Dream Island.
*The Narrator saying "However, even if you are not ready for the pancakes, it cannot always be waffle iron" is a reference to "Praise God" by Kanye West. 
**The original line is also from "Speech to the Young: Speech to the Progress-Toward (Among them Nora and Henry III)"
*The "BFDI Gasp" sound effect is a recurring sound in another Object Show, Battle for Dream Island.
*The song "How to Fight Loneliness" being included is only because of the episode "Something Old" from "How I Met Your Mother."
*Mama Luigi being in heaven is a reference to "SuperMarioLogan," in which there is a character known as "Mama Luigi" that is dead.
*"Bicycle Race" by Queen is only used because of the "American Dad!" episode, "Jack's Back."
*The credits include multiple references:
**The "American Dad!" credits sequence.
**The "The Simpsons" credits sequence.
**The music in the "Gracie Films" logo being referred to as "And now the show is over now!" is a reference to "Family Guy" episode, "The Simpsons Guy."
*