20 Things to Say to Noobs When...

On this page, i will be writing 20 things to say or do in certain situations with noobs. This is a subpage of The Noob Academy and Learning Center and was created by Curycoo
PLEASE GIVE ME THINGS TO WRITE ABOUT!!!
==What to say when.... A NOOB ASKS TO DRIVE YOUR WAR FRIGATE!==
"Okay, just kill Barbossa's monkey. I hear he always drops legendaries!"
"Yes, I'm sure you know how to steer. Why are you asking ME if you can steer?"
"Lets see... I'm level 46, your level 3. Those ships are level 40. Now ask your question again in your head."
"No thanks."
"Grab a cannon. You might be able to control it. Just might, maybe not."
"To be or not to be, that is the question. No, you can't steer."
"If you want to steer, why are you on MY ship?"
"See, this ship is public. Now wouldn't it be fun, if all 15 of you noobs on MY ship got to drive?"
"Go jump off the ship" (Sometimes they actually try XD)
"OH MY GOD LOOK!!! LOOK ITS JOLLY ROGER'S SHIP!!!! GET ON A CANNON!!!"
"I hear there is more pork on Tortuga."
Let them steer, take it back. Let them steer, take it back. Repeat.
Drive to the middle of uncharted waters, let them drive until they bore.
Pull out staff, and use desolation, and a few withers for good measure.
"No, I like my 64 gold." (the amount a full war frigate repair costs)
"No, I'm just sailing somewhere."
"No, im doing a quest."
"No, I dont trust you."
"ALL ON THIS SHIP THAT THINK THIS PIRATE SHOULD STEER, SAY AYE!!!"
"I wont give in. Thats right, call your hundred other noob friends."
==What to say when... NOOBS NEED DIRECTIONS!!!==
A lot of times, noobs dont know where to go. So you can help them! (NOTE: a lot of these are lies)
"See that ray of light? Follow that. It's a noob. Just like you."
"I don't know, I never did that."
"That doesn't exist."
"I'll help you in a while."
"Come ask again when you have found it."
"Do I KNOW you???"
"Oh, you dont want to go there. I hear rage ghosts drop a free voodoo doll too!"
"Er... I forgot. I evolved past noobiness."
"Follow me.... Dude, no, this way. Idiot. no, NO THATS A RAGE GHOST!!! Crap. Well, bye, have fun in jail!"
"If you got to the Tormenta Thrall Room to ask for help, you dont need it, kay?"
One by John Breasly: "Hmm, not sure. Hey, if you find anyone with the guild called INFERNO, they'll definitely know."
"Ever heard of MAPS???"
"I can give you directions to a game that requires much less intellectual power, as you seem to lack that one crucial element."
"Je Ne Parle Pas en Anglais."
"Why don't you tell me?"
"Hmmm" Keep saying Hmmm and "That way! No that way! No no no this way come on! No that way! Wait a minute... Hmmm...."
==What to say when... A NOOB TRIES TO BOSS YOU AROUND!==
Sometimes, noobs try to act all powerful and boss people around. There are many ways to counter this.
"Your ship your rules? How bout My Gun, versus your rules?"
"Aye Captain!I shall not do anything, Including Listen to you, without oyur direct order, which i shall not hear, because I'm not Listening to you!"
"Thats right. You have an army. I'm very scared of armies i can kill in one hit."
"You have experience? YOU HAVE EXPERIENCE??? [/laugh]"
"Surely my superior intellectual capability makes me the most reasonable candidate of commandeering said ship of which we are using our leg muscles to stand on currently?"
"Okay." (Repeat okay at every possible opportunity.)
"Yes sir! Sir, may I provide assistance? To become invincible and get a powerful sword you must type in /quit, sir!"
Category:NALC
Category:POTCO