Lust Control

:ਰੇ ਮਨ ਗਹਿਲੇ ਬਾਵਲੇ ਮਾਣਹਿ ਕਿਆ ਰਲੀਆਂ ॥੫੫॥
:रे मन गहिले बावले माणहि किआ रलीआं ॥५५॥
:ray man gahilay baavlay maaneh ki-aa ralee-aaN. ||55||
:O my thoughtless and insane mind, why are you indulging in pleasures? 
:||55||(Sheikh Farid)
==LUST and ILLEGITIMATE SEX==
It is one of the greatest evils that tempts people away from God. It makes an individual weak-willed and unreliable. The normal sexual relationship of house-holders (a married couple) is not restricted in any way in Sikhism. But sex outside of marriage or sex forced against the will of ones partner is taboo, as it can cause unlimited sorrows.
:ਸੁਣਿ ਸੁਣਿ ਕਾਮ ਗਹੇਲੀਏ ਕਿਆ ਚਲਹਿ ਬਾਹ ਲੁਡਾਇ ॥
:सुणि सुणि काम गहेलीए किआ चलहि बाह लुडाइ ॥
:sun sun kaam gahaylee-ay ki-aa chaleh baah ludaa-ay.
:Listen, listen, Oh, soul-bride: you are overtaken by 
:sexual desire-why do you walk like that, swinging your arms in joy? 
::::::::(Page 37, Line 18) Guru Amar Das)
:ਅਹਿਨਿਸਿ ਕਾਮਿ ਵਿਆਪਿਆ ਵਣਜਾਰਿਆ ਮਿਤ੍ਰਾ ਅੰਧੁਲੇ ਨਾਮੁ ਨ ਚਿਤਿ ॥
:अहिनिसि कामि विआपिआ वणजारिआ मित्रा अंधुले नामु न चिति ॥
:ahinis kaam vi-aapi-aa vanjaari-aa mitraa anDhulay naam na chit.
:Day and night, you are engrossed in sexual desire, 
:O my merchant friend, and your consciousness is blind to the Naam.
::::::::(Guru Nanak Dev page 75 line 16)
:ਉਛਲਿਆ ਕਾਮੁ ਕਾਲ ਮਤਿ ਲਾਗੀ ਤਉ ਆਨਿ ਸਕਤਿ ਗਲਿ ਬਾਂਧਿਆ ॥੨॥
:उछलिआ कामु काल मति लागी तउ आनि सकति गलि बांधिआ ॥२॥
:uchhli-aa kaam kaal mat laagee ta-o aan sakat gal baaNDhi-aa. 
:You are overflowing with sexual desire, and your intellect 
:is stained with darkness; you are held in the grip of Shakti's power.
::::::::||2|| (Bhagat Baini page 93 line 7)
:ਅਵਰ ਮਰਤ ਮਾਇਆ ਮਨੁ ਤੋਲੇ ਤਉ ਭਗ ਮੁਖਿ ਜਨਮੁ ਵਿਗੋਇਆ ॥੩॥
:अवर मरत माइआ मनु तोले तउ भग मुखि जनमु विगोइआ ॥३॥
:avar marat maa-i-aa man tolay ta-o bhag mukh janam vigo-i-aa. 
:When others die, you measure your own wealth in your mind; 
:you waste your life in the pleasures of the mouth and sexual organs. 
::::::::||3|| (Devotee Baini page 93 line 10)
:Your eyebrows are like a bow, from which the arrows of lust are 
:coming out and striking us like the dagger
::::::::Dasam Granth Page 703, Line 1
==VIRGINITY==
The loss of virginity can be viewed as a milestone to be proud of or as a failure to be ashamed of (particularly if a lack of self-control was involved), depending on cultural perceptions. these perceptions were heavily influenced by perceived gender roles, such that for a male the association was more often with pride and for a female the association was more often with shame. But today women feel pride about this not in western culture but in other countries too. 
In Sikhism, The sexual activity must occur only between married individuals(Unde Control) for purpose of child. Before marriage it is said to be sin, as it is a pat of kaam(lust or sexual desire). If a girl/boy looses his virginity before marriage because to satisfy her/his needs then this is sin for both. This comes under sexual desire i.e. kam(one of vices). If virginity looses through masturbation then it is also a sin as your thinkings must be wrong at that time. Virginity is important aspect and everyone must take care of it before marriage.
 ਜਾਂ ਕੁਆਰੀ ਤਾ ਚਾਉ ਵੀਵਾਹੀ ਤਾਂ ਮਾਮਲੇ ॥
 jaaN ku-aaree taa chaa-o veevaahee taaN maamlay
 When she is a virgin, she is full of desire; but when she is married, then her troubles begin.
 
 ਫਰੀਦਾ ਏਹੋ ਪਛੋਤਾਉ ਵਤਿ ਕੁਆਰੀ ਨ ਥੀਐ ॥੬੩॥
 फरीदा एहो पछोताउ वति कुआरी न थीऐ ॥६३॥
 fareedaa ayho pachhotaa-o vat ku-aaree na thee-ai. ||63||
 Fareed, she has this one regret, that she cannot be a virgin again. ||63||
 (Page 1381, Line 5/6 Sheikh Farid)
ABOUT PURITY OF VIRGINITY
 ਖਿੰਥਾ ਕਾਲੁ ਕੁਆਰੀ ਕਾਇਆ ਜੁਗਤਿ ਡੰਡਾ ਪਰਤੀਤਿ ॥
 खिंथा कालु कुआरी काइआ जुगति डंडा परतीति ॥
 khinthaa kaal ku-aaree kaa-i-aa jugat dandaa parteet.
 Let the remembrance of death be the patched coat you wear, let the purity of
 virginity be your way in the world, and let faith in the Lord be your walking stick. 
 Guru Nanak Dev(Page 6 Line 16)
==MASTURBATION==
*Sikhi on masturbating
==WATCHING PORN==
Sikhs should not watch porn. these things keep you away from not only spiritual life but also effect your normal life. These makes you masturbative and you will loose your virginity all this falls under part of kam. You are watching for internal pleasure. This is banned for Sikhs. 
Actually the businessmen of porn know that Kaam(lust) is the main evil which is in every human being they take support of this evil and makes you kami. They earn money through kam And can destroy your life through it.
 ਤੀਜੈ ਝਾਖ ਝਖਾਇਆ ਚਉਥੈ ਭੋਰੁ ਭਇਆ ॥
 तीजै झाख झखाइआ चउथै भोरु भइआ ॥
 teejai jhaakh jhakhaa-i-aa cha-uthai bhor bha-i-aa.
 In the third, they babble nonsense, and when the fourth 
 watch comes, the day of death has arrived.
 Guru Arjan Page 43 line 12)
 ਅਗਿਆਨ ਮਤੀ ਅੰਧੇਰੁ ਹੈ ਬਿਨੁ ਪਿਰ ਦੇਖੇ ਭੁਖ ਨ ਜਾਇ ॥
 अगिआन मती अंधेरु है बिनु पिर देखे भुख न जाइ ॥
 agi-aan matee anDhayr hai bin pir daykhay bhukh na jaa-ay.
 In the darkness of intellectual ignorance, she cannot 
 see her Husband, and her hunger does not depart.
 Guru amardas page 38 line 5
 
 Bura dekhan main chalea (kabir)
 
 Ranna hoyian bodhian purash hoye sinyaar
 (Kuriyan nu dikhan da shonk te pursh nu wekhan daa)
Many things are written i guru granth sahib if you don't have self-control go towards guru granth sahib. He/she/it(wat to say) will definitely show you the way.
==SIKH ATTITUDE TO FAMILY PLANNING ==
*Sikhi on Family Planning
==HOW TO GET RID of all this==
1. Wisdom (gyan) : is the complete knowledge of a set of religious principles. It can be achieved by hearing good, thinking good and doing good. A man of wisdom tries to achieve a high moral standard in his life and interaction with others. According to Sikhism, the first steps to wisdom is to consider oneself as an ignorant person who has to learn a lot in life.
2. Truthful Living (sat) : This is more than 'truth'. It means living according to the way of God i.e. the thoughts should match the words that a person speaks and his actions should also match his words. Truthful living brings a person closer to God.
3. Justice (niaon) : means freedom and equal opportunities for all. Respect for the rights of others and strict absence of attempts to exploit a fellow being. Sikhism forbids the desire to loot another's property. It also strictly instructs the Sikhs to show respect even for the women and children of an enemy.
4. Temperance (santokh) : means self-control which has to be developed
through meditation and prayers. A Sikh has to banish evil thoughts from his mind by constantly repeating Gods name and reciting prayers. Torture to the body to develop self-control is not advocated in Sikhism
5. Patience (dhiraj) : implies a high level of tolerance and empathy for others. It requires control over ones ego and willingness to overlook another's weakness or mistakes. It requires that a Sikh should be strong willed, but kind hearted.
6. Courage (himmat) : means bravery i.e. absence of fear. It is the ability to stake ones life for ones convictions and for saving others from injustice or cruelty.
7. Humility (namarta) : is a deliberate denial of pleasure at one's own
praise and admiration. It means underplaying ones own strengths and
respecting the abilities of others. It is the antidote to 'ahankar'
8. Contentment (sabar) : means refraining from worldly fears and submitting oneself to the will of God. The typical worldly fears can be fear of death, poverty, disrespect and defeat. It is this virtue that has given the Sikhs the moral strength to withstand the various atrocities committed on their community in the last three centuries.
at gurus time, Guru gobind singh said abt Sikhs -
 ਜੁੱਧ ਜਿਤੇ ਇਨ ਹੀ ਕੇ ਪ੍ਰਸਾਦਿ ਇਨ ਹੀ ਕੇ ਪ੍ਰਸਾਦਿ ਸੁ ਦਾਨ ਕਰੇ ॥ 
 ਅਘ ਅਉਘ ਟਰੈ ਇਨ ਹੀ ਕੇ ਪ੍ਰਸਾਦਿ ਇਨ ਹੀ ਕ੍ਰਿਪਾ ਫੁਨ ਧਾਮ ਭਰੇ ॥
 जु्ध जिते इन ही के प्रसादि इन ही के प्रसादि सु दान करे ॥ 
 अघ अउघ टरै इन ही के प्रसादि इन ही क्रिपा फुन धाम भरे ॥
 By the kindness of these Sikhs, I have conquered the wars and 
 also by their kindness, I have bestowed charities; 
 by their kindness the clusters on sins have been destroyed and 
 by their kindness my house is full of wealth and materials;
What are you giving to gurus know blady kaam, krofh lobh moh & hankaar. How can u think that guru is with you. If you leave all this then guru says
 o sahib main us daa chela
lets bid before god and ask sorry to him - 
 “O my Master. I am silly, save me, 0 my Lord-God!
 Thy slave’s praise in thine own glory!” (AG, 166)
Category:Divine Thinkings
Category:Youth