The Joy of Sect/Quotes

:Lisa: Watch yourself, Dad. You're the highly suggestible type.
:Homer: Yes, I am the highly suggestible type.
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:Homer: Homer no function beer well without.
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:Homer: Outta my way, jerkass!
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:Homer: Wait! I'm confused about the movie. So the cops knew that Internal Affairs was setting them up?
:Male Movementarian (Glen): What are you talking about!? There's nothing like that in there.
:Homer: You see, when I get bored I make up my own movie. I have a very short attention span.
:Female Movementarian (Jane): But our point is very simple. You see, when...
:Homer: (pointing outside) Oh, look! A bird! (Homer leaves the room chasing the bird)
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:Reverend Lovejoy: This so-called "new religion" is nothing but a pack of weird rituals and chants designed to take away the money of fools. Let us say the Lord's prayer forty times, but first let's pass the collection plate.
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:Kent Brockman: Springfield has been overrun by a strange and almost certainly evil sect calling themselves the Movementarians. In exchange for your home and all your money, the Leader of this way-out and wrong religion claims he'll take believers away on his spaceship to the planet Blisstonia. Excuse my editorial laugh. (laughs) But- (a hand gives a piece of paper to Kent) Ladies and gentlemen, I've just learned of a change in this statiors management. Welcome, Movementarians. Continue to improve our lives. I love you, perfect Leader, and new C.E.O. of KBBL Broadcasting.
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:Glen: Attention everyone. Let's all give thanks to The Leader for this glorious day!
:Glen and Jane: (chanting in unsion) The Leader is good. The Leader is great. We surrender our will as of this date!
:Everyone: (chanting, except Homer) The Leader is good. The Leader is great. We surrender our will as of this date!
:Jane: It's no use. He's obviously the most powerful mind we've ever dealt with!
:Glen: Or... (chanting to the rhythm of Batman's Theme Song; to Jane) Na na na na na na na na Leader! (to the table) Na na na na na na na na Leader!
:Everyone: (chanting, except Homer) Na na na na na na na na Leader! Na na na na na na na na Leader! Leader! Leader! Leader!
:Homer: (with final "Leader" chant in above chant) Batman! I mean, Leader! I love the Leader!
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:Mr. Burns: You see me as a god, right, Smithers?
:Smithers: Absolutely, sir.
:Mr. Burns: You'd kneel before me.
:Smithers: Boy, would I!
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:Marge: (To Homer) You what?
:Homer: Come again, Marge?
:Marge: You what?
:Homer: I've joined the Movementarians. And so have all of you.
:Marge: We what?
:Homer: All I had to give them was our life savings, the deed to the house and a commitment of ten trillion years of labor.
:Marge: I can't go along with this, Homer.
:Homer: Marge, when I join an underground cult, I expect a little support from my family.
:Lisa: Dad, do you think you might have been brainwashed?
:Homer: I have not been brainwashed. (In a lower tone, scaring Lisa) Kill the girl, kill the girl.
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:Bart: Church, cult, cult, church. So we'll get bored someplace else every Sunday. Does this really change our everyday lives?
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:Marge: (to Homer) When we got married, you promised me my harvesting days were over.
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:Mrs. Krabappel: And who can tell me where thunder and lightning come from? Yes, Bart!?
:Bart: The Leader, ma'am.
:Mrs. Krabappel: Very good, Bart! And who invented Morse code?
:Bart: Oh... I should know this one! Th... The Leader!?
:Mrs. Krabappel: Ah! Correct again.
:Lisa: (yelling) He's wrong! You're wrong!! The whole damn system is wrong!! (She screams and kicks the table)
:Mrs. Krabappel: What's the matter Lisa? You used to be such a good student. Don't you want to please your teachers and get good grades?
:Lisa: (sighs) Grades!?
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:Homer: These lima beans are even better than the ones we had for breakfast and lunch! Oh! A lima bean that looks just like the Leader! I'll put it with the others!
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:Marge: Now, how are we going to get my Homey back?
:(Willie emerges from the shadows)
:Willie: I’ll kidnap him for fifty, deprogram him for a hundred, and kill him for five hundred.
:Marge: No, no, no. Just the first two.
:Willie: Alright. I’ll throw in the killing for free.
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:Homer: Marge? You're the Leader? You don't look anything like the beans!
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:Kent Brockman: Attention, all citizens. Even though the Leader himself is completely nonviolent, he urges you to be as violent as you like in capturing the Simpsons.
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:(As Reverend Lovejoy tries to knock Homer out with a baseball bat)
:Willie: Give me that, you noodle-armed choir boy! (hits Homer, but it still doesn't knock him out)
:Reverend Lovejoy: Well, that didn't do it, Mr. Kilt.
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:(Homer, Bart and Lisa are tied up in a dark room with only a small dim light on)
:Groundskeeper Willie: Oh, you're gonna break like matchsticks, I promise you that.
:(Ned comes through the door, turns on the big light)
:Ned Flanders: Hey, I made some Rice Krispies Squares for our hungry deprogram-erinos.
:Groundskeeper Willie: Oh, man! You ruined the atmosphere, you daft pansy!
:Ned Flanders: Well, this is my rumpus room.
:Groundskeeper Willie: Don't call it that!
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:Willie: What's so all-fire great about your fancy-pants Leader?
:Homer: The Leader sees all and knows all.
:Willie: Ooh, that is impressive!
:Homer: And he's going to take us to a wonderful new planet.
:Willie: Oh, this Leader... He sounds like a grand fellow!
:Marge: Willie, I'm not sure we're making any headway here.
:Willie: Would you shut up, woman? He's talking about my Leader!
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:Lisa: It's great that we can all think for ourselves again.
:TV Announcer: You are watching FOX.
:Family: (Robotically in unison) We are watching FOX.
es:The Joy of Sect/Frases
Category:Incomplete