Locked In School - A Short Story

(Gerald and Kyle are in maths class)
Mr. Miller: Okay class, I have 6 bottles in one hand and 7 in the other. What do I have?
(Gerald puts his hand up)
Mr. Miller: Gerald?
Gerald: Alcoholism.
(Entire class laughs)
Mr. Miller: That's it! 1 hour after school detention!
Gerald: I'm gonna miss my bus, egghead!
Mr. Miller: You should've thought of that!
Gerald: YOU'RE JUST AN INHUMANE GUY!
Mr. Miller: TWO HOURS AFTER SCHOOL!
Gerald: GOD DAMN IT!!!
Kyle: But he's gonna miss his-
Mr. Miller: TWO HOURS AFTER SCHOOL FOR THE BOTH OF YOU!
(Two hours later)
Gerald: Finally. Detention's over. Come with me, I gotta take a dump.
(They are in the toilets for 30 minutes)
Gerald: Damn. Don't remember eating that.
Kyle: C'mon. Let's go home.
(They try to open the door but it won't open)
Gerald: It's locked.
Kyle: Huh?
(Kyle pulls it)
Kyle: Huh. It really is stuck.
(5 seconds later)
(Kyle and Gerald are screaming and banging on the door).
Kyle and Gerald: LET US OUT!!!!!!!
(They give up)
Kyle: At least we're not in the bathroom! It smells like fried chicken in there, no thanks to you!
Gerald: I didn't even have fried chicken for lunch.
Kyle: YOU HAD IT FOR DINNER LAST NIGHT!
Gerald: Speaking of food, I missed lunch. I got detention for flirting with my friend.
Kyle: Aww.
Gerald: I swear you better shut up or I'm keeping this to myself.
Kyle: What do you have in your bag?
Gerald: One sec. (Empties his bag) A half eaten bag of hard candies, a pack of 5 gum, some mints, a sandwich, and a packet of mayonnaise.
Kyle: Why do you have a packet of mayonnaise in your bag?
Gerald: It's for my sandwich. The sandwich I missed no thanks to our science teacher. So, what've you got?
Kyle: Some white chocolate cookies and a sandwich.
Gerald: You think it'll last?
Kyle: Dunno.
Gerald: I got an idea.
Kyle: What?
Gerald: My phone's on full. Believe it or not, but I don't sneak on it during class. I call a number on my phone, and send 50 pizzas to the school.
Kyle: But... why?
Gerald: Because, 1: I'm hungry. 2: It's funny.
(Gerald sends 50 pizzas to the school)
Kyle: What about when the teachers find out?
Gerald: I'll pay for the stupid pizzas.
Kyle: THEY COST 285 DOLLARS!!!
Gerald: Yeah. I don't have to sell many games for that.
Kyle: Wait, what?
Gerald: I found a stack of unplayed games from years ago. I've been trading them in at that cheap place for CASH.
Kyle: You're newest get rich quick scheme?
Gerald: C'mon dude. It's my first one.
Kyle: Whatever.
Gerald: I just realized something.
Kyle: What?
Gerald: How are we gonna eat 50 pizzas?
Kyle: Ration them!
Gerald: Cold pizza? I don't even like hot pizza dude.
Kyle: But you just- whatever!
Gerald: I wish that girl was here right now.
Kyle: Is her name Ste-
Gerald: I swear I'mma kill you.
Kyle: You should just let your feelings aboout Stella out.
Gerald: One more time and I will kill you.
Kyle: Sorry.
Gerald: That's a dead meme.
Kyle: So how do we get out?
Gerald: (putting mayonnaise on his sandwich) Dunno.
Kyle: We should really find a way out.
Gerald: (eats his sandwich) Yeah. I agree.
(Gerald drinks a bottle of lemonade)
Kyle: Since when did you have a drink in your bag?
Gerald: In the pockets.
Kyle: Oh. 
Gerald: So, we should really *hiccuburp* find a way out.
Kyle: What about the 50 pizzas?
Gerald: Oh yeah. (Throws $285 on the floor plus an extra $20 in tips)
Kyle: You just blew $300 on a prank.
Gerald: $305 actually. (Gerald tries the second door) Oh, I was opening the wrong door all along. (Opens the door and they are out)
Kyle: ARE YOU SERIOUS???
Gerald: Cya! (Runs off)
Category:Gerald-XR-Donovan