Follicle Fitness/Transcript

The following is a transcript for the episode "Follicle Fitness".
== ==
(Poppy, Holly, and Val are at Dr. Moonbloom’s clinic. The Trolls are going to get their hair checked.)
Dr. Moonbloom: (Coming through the doors) Next patient for examination is… Valentina Dangerskull Thundershock?
Poppy and Holly: Valentina? 
Val: Ha! My full name rocks so hard. (She gets up and fire appears.) YEEEEEAAAAAH! (Some bats carry her to her checkup.)
Holly: Gotta hand it to ya, Poppy girl, it was a great idea to suggest every Troll to get a follicle fitness test.
Poppy: Thanks, Holly. Nothing’s more important to me than making sure that everyone in TrollsTopia is hair healthy. (We cut to Dr. Moonbloom checking on Val’s hair.)
Dr. Moonbloom: Stick out your bangs. (Val sticks out her bangs.)
Val: Ah!
Dr. Moonbloom: Someone’s been brushing. (Next, she checks the X-ray of Guy Diamond’s hair. A beep is heard and she sees Tiny Diamond.) Nothing unusual here. (Next, she checks on Branch’s hair’s reflexes.) Want to know a secret? Doctors only do this test because it’s fun. (She hits Branch’s hair while singing a song. Then she sees Holly.) Holly Darlin’?
Poppy: Good luck, Holly!
Holly: Oh, Poppy, trust me. With hair this tall and gorgeous, I can’t fail. (Unfortunately, she fails.) I failed?! (She rubs her hair.) But… my hair, it’s so tall and gorgeous. 
Dr. Moonbloom: Agreed. But volume and hold on this scale requires a large amount of hair products, which, when taken in excess, lead to poor hair health.
Holly: Oh, but I don’t use a lotta hair spray. (A bottle of hair spray falls from her hair.) Oops. (giggles) Now how did that get in there? (As she goes to pick the hair spray bottle up, more fall out.) OK! So I use a lotta hair spray! It’s just the way it’s always been. (She takes out a picture of her getting hair spray when she was younger.) Every week, when I was just a li’l Country Troll, my mamma would treat me and my ‘do to H.T. Hairnum’s Wagon of Hair Care Wares.
Dr. Moonbloom: I’m sorry. Who is H.T. Hairnum? (An eagle’s screech is heard. Gust comes out from behind the curtains.)
Gust: Who is H.T. Hairnum? Only the purveyor of the most decadent hair delights in all of Lonesome Flats. Why, rubbin’ in just a dab of his pomade is like giving your hair a great big hug. Well, good-bye. (He closes the curtains and the eagle’s screech is heard again.)
Dr. Moonbloom: How is that bird getting in here? Holly, I want you to give up hair spray for six weeks.
Holly: (Gasping while holding her hair) No! She didn’t mean it, beautiful.
Dr. Moonbloom: Yes, I did. At that time, you’ll retake the fitness test. Meanwhile, I’m prescribing this. (She gives a sheet of Paper to Holly.)
Holly: “One membership too…” (We cut to her and Poppy in gym clothes.)
Poppy: The Hairnasium! (The Hairnasium is shown as she and Holly approach it. They are wearing gym clothes.)
Holly: Oh, Poppy, I don’t know. No hair spray, exhaustin’ exercise. (She and Poppy go up the stairs.) I’m not sure I’m cut out to be hair healthy.
Poppy: Of course you are, Holly. Especially with Synth and Smidge as your trainers. (Synth and Smidge jump in.)
Synth and Smidge: Woo-hoo!
Synth: Yo, Holly, we’re ready to do this! Are you ready to do this?!
Holly: I… guess so?
Smidge: She guesses so! (She and Synth high-five.)
Synth and Smidge: Yeah!
Smidge: Just so you know, when it comes to helping you get your hair healthy, we give 100%!
Synth: Then we add 12 to that!
Smidge: Then we double that!
Synth: Then we take a second ‘cause the math got pretty complicated. And we get…
Both: 224%!
Smidge: 224?!
Synth: 224!
Smidge: 224?!
Synth: 224!
Both: Yeah! (They do a dance.)
Smidge: Now, don’t worry; the Hairnasium’s got something for everyone. Like hair-robics. (We show Guy Diamond doing hair-robics.)
Guy Diamond: Ha! Whoo! Ha! (She shows DJ Suki spinning records with some Trolls.)
Synth: Spinning classes.
DJ Suki: Come on, everybody! Keep spinning those records! Hey-o! (We show a café where a Troll is giving a smoothie for a red male Pop Troll’s hair.)
Smidge: And even an all-organic hair nutrition café.
Pop Troll #1: Ah! (He pours his smoothie onto his hair.)
Smidge: And the results speak for themselves. (laughs) When Minuet first came to us. Her hair could barely life an ice cream sprinkle. But look at her now. (Minuet is seen lifting a weight with her hair. Some Classical Trolls are watching her.)
All: Push it! Push it! (Minuet lifts the weight very high and they cheer for her.)
Minuet: GET THAT CUPCAKE OUTTA MY HOUSE!!!
Holly: Well, hot dang! It actually looks kinda fun. (We cut to her running on a treadmill with her hair.) Not fun! This is not fun, y’all! (She falls down and goes around the treadmill.)
Smidge: Keep your form. Holly, keep your form! Oh, my Guh! (Later, Holly is doing yoga with Creek.)
Creek: Good hair health requires good hair balance. And hair yoga is all about balance. So let us begin with the tree pose.
All: Omm. (They form a tree with their hair. Holly struggles to balance.)
Creek: Um… Holly. Your tree appears to be caught in a bit of a breeze.
Holly: I… I can’t balance, y’all! This tree is comin’ down! TIMBER! (Her hair lands on Creek.)
Creek: And we call this pose, “Howling in Pain”! (He screams in pain. As we show a montage of Holly failing various hair exercises, Poppy and Smidge sing Pump It Up.)
(Poppy)
It won’t be easy
But I believe in you
And you believe in me
There’s no excuses
Just gotta do it
Go on, give it everything
(Poppy and Smidge)
Let me see you sweat, sweat
Let me see you work it
Never giving until the end
Let me see you sweat, sweat
You can handle it, yeah
Just keep going and going
And don’t quit
You just gotta pump it up
No pain, no gain, we just gonna train
Until we pump it up
Don’t stop working
Keep the fire burnin’
Pump it up (Three weeks later, an exhausted Holly is seen leaving the Hairnasium with Poppy. We can see that her hair is a big mess.)
Holly: Ugh… Every follicle hurts. (She tugs on Poppy’s tank top.) Why, Poppy?! Why am I puttin’ my hair through this?! There’s no way I’m ever gonna pass that fitness test! (sighs) I just don’t have what it takes.
Poppy: Yes, Holly, you do. Look, I know it’s hard, but trust me, any day now, you’re gonna see results and your whole outlook will change.
Holly: Oh, I don’t know what to do, Poppy. I just wish I had some sort of sign…
H.T. Hairnum: Hoo-whee! (He gets out of his carriage.) Come on down, y’all! Come on down and indulge your ‘do’s every craving with some of H.T. Hairnum’s Hair Care Wares! (His cane pulls a switch and his carriage becomes a shelf of hair spray bottles. A Puffalo pops up.)
Holly: (gasps) It’s a sign!
H.T. Hairnum: I got pomade! Who needs a pomade? You sir, pomade, pomade. Who needs hairspray? Do I see a hairspray? Hair spray, hair spray? (Many Trolls raise their hands. Holly becomes eager to get some hairspray.)
Poppy: Be strong, Holly. After everything you’ve been through, you can’t give up.
Holly: Oh, I’m givin’ up, y’all. (She runs toward the hairspray shelf.) Hair spray over here! 
Poppy: No! (She grabs Holly with her hair. She struggles to free herself.) Look, I get it. They’re your favorite hair treats, but… (grunts) What is that H.T. Hairnum guy doing here anyway? (The eagle flies by and Gust comes out of the bushes.)
Gust: Actually, after all the talk of his hair products before, I wrote a letter asking him to visit TrollsTopia. Pomade here! Pomade! (Holly manages to free herself from Poppy’s hair.)
Poppy: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Holly: Ha-ha! (Smidge and Synth jump in and block her way.) 
Synth: (Doing exercise moves with Smidge) Holly! What in the name of my resting heart rate are you doing? After all your hard work, you’re gonna quit just like that?
Holly: Just like that. Now, I appreciate everythin’ you’ve done, but y’all need to kindly step aside so Holly Darlin’ can get to sprayin’! 
Smidge: Not a chance, Holly! If we let you quit, we’d be giving you… less than 224%. 224?
Synth: 224.
Smidge: 224?
Synth: 224.
Smidge: Yeah!
Synth: Yeah! (They do karate poses.)
Holly: Oh, oh, oh, my. You’re right. Gee, I really lost my head for a second there, y’all. By the way, your forms are a little off.
Smidge and Synth: What?! (Holly sprints past them to the hair spray shelf.)
Holly: I lied! Your forms are annoyingly perfect! (She grabs some hairspray and runs off.) Yeeeeaaaah!
Poppy: Holly, no! (She, Smidge, and Synth run after Holly. She runs between two rocks and blocks them with a boulder.)
Poppy, Smidge, and Synth: Ah! 
Holly: Ha! (Smidge and Synth jump over the rock.)
Smidge: 224?!
Synth: 224! (Poppy climbs over the boulder. Holly trips over a twig and goes flying.)
Holly: Whoa! (Luckily, her hair forms legs and she lands safely. Then it starts moving. We can see that she is getting closer to a narrow bridge.) Uh-oh! (She balances herself across the narrow bridge. Poppy, Smidge, and Synth run across a regular bridge.)
Smidge: Bridge! Use the bridge! (Holly continues running.)
Synth: So convenient! So convenient! (Holly soon stops at the edge of a cliff.)
Poppy, Smidge, and Synth: Holly! (They stop running and movie closer to Holly. She looks down and takes out a hair spray bottle.)
Holly: I’ll do it! (Poppy, Smidge, and Synth gasp.) Don’t think I won’t ‘cause I’ve got nothin’ left to lose!
Synth: Whoa! Whoa!
Smidge: Holly, put the spray down.
Holly: (Taking out another hair spray bottle) One more step and I’ll shellac this hair six ways from Sunday!
Poppy: Holly, please! You’ve worked so hard!
Holly: Exactly! I’ve been sweatin’ like a Hog Bug in the hot house on free salsa night for weeks now, and for what?! I keep tellin’ y’all I can’t be a hair-healthy Troll! I don’t have what it takes!
Poppy: But don’t you see? You just demonstrated that you absolutely have what it takes.
Holly: Huh?
Synth: Yeah. You just moved boulders with your hair, yo!
Smidge: You walked upside down like it was nothing!
Poppy: You balanced from one side of that river to the other side without a wobble. You couldn’t do any of that three weeks ago.
Holly: (Looking at her hair spray bottles) My… my stars, you’re right. I… I’m actually gettin’ results. Maybe I am cut out to be hair-healthy after all, y’all.
Poppy, Smidge, and Synth: Yeah! (They run over to Holly and hug her.)
Poppy: Come on. Let’s get you home.
Holly: Actually, I kinda feel like headin’ back to the Hairnasium. (Poppy, Smidge, and Synth gasp happily.)
Smidge and Synth: 224?
Holly: 224.
Smidge and Synth: 224?
Holly: 224!
Smidge, Holly, and Synth: Yeah! (Three weeks later, Dr. Moonbloom checks on Holly’s hair.)
Dr. Moonbloom: Holly, I’m happy to report that those six weeks really paid off. You’ve passed the fitness test. (Poppy, Smidge, Holly, and Synth close their eyes, put their hands in the air, and cheer.)
Holly: Thanks, y’all. From now on, I’m gonna use hair spray in moderation. It’ll be tough, but I know I got what it takes.
Dr. Moonbloom: Excellent. Now, if you’ll excuse me, my next patient is waiting. (The eagle flies by. Holly and Dr. Moonbloom remove the curtains to reveal Gust with long and messy hair.)
Gust: (groans) So much pomade! Why did I use so much pomade?! (He falls over and the episode ends.)
Category:TT Season 5 episode transcripts
Category:Trolls: TrollsTopia transcripts
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