A Trip In The Woods

A Trip In The Woods is the third episode of SBFW Campsite, and the third in season 1.
==Plot==
SeemsGood and Matchy get lost when they go on a trip in the woods.
==Transcript==
(The episode starts with SeemsGood and Jasbre lifting up a heavy package into Jasbre’s house)
SeemsGood: What’s even in this damn thing?
Jasbre: It’s my custom SpongeBob Blu-Ray rips. All in crispy 4K. (moans)
SeemsGood: Yeah, you have a cartoon fetish, my dude.
Jasbre: I don’t have any fetishes. Unlike Crazy.
SeemsGood: You talk about that shit all the time. It gets boring.
Jasbre: Well, then why not we do something else? That is, after getting this package inside.
SeemsGood: I dunno, maybe take a walk in the woods?
Jasbre: I’d rather not. I have 200 SpongeBob episodes to rewatch for the 206th time.
SeemsGood: But you just said-
Jasbre: Nuh-uh. I’m not going outside until I rewatch all those episodes.
SeemsGood: Fine. But I’m asking the others if they want to walk in the woods with me.
Jasbre: Hold on. (SeemsGood lets go of the package, then Jasbre does the same) Fine, do what you want.
SeemsGood: Yay! (runs away, while Jasbre looks at Bong)
Jasbre: Continue, please.
Bong: (sighs) Fine.
(theme song. Cut to SeemsGood knocking on Matchy’s door. Matchy opens the door.)
Matchy: Hey, Seems, what do you want?
SeemsGood: I was wondering if we could go on a trip to the woods.
Matchy: Sure! I like going on trips.
SeemsGood: We’ll go this afternoon.
Matchy: Okay!
SeemsGood: Alrighty then. See you this afternoon! (he leaves. Cut to a montage of SeemsGood knocking on people’s doors and asking if they want to join the trip)
Polar: Nah.
Bong: No.
Jasbre: No. I’m masturbating to the SpongeBob Blu-Ray rips!
SeemsGood: So you had a cartoon fetish after all.
Jasbre: Shit.
SpongeBot: No need to. I am doing my snorting cocaine session!
(Cut to SeemsGood with a frown)
SeemsGood: Looks like they don’t want to smell the beautifulness of nature. Dang fools.
(Pluto pops up, bandaged)
Pluto: YoU!
SeemsGood: Oh shit. (he runs away and Pluto chases him)
(Cut to afternoon, when SeemsGood and Matchy are preparing for the trip)
SeemsGood: This is gonna be fun!
Matchy: Yeah! We will watch Bambi rip-offs go by the river!
SeemsGood: Yeah…
Matchy: I'm bringing my 3DS, because reasons.
SeemsGood: That thing’s ancient.
Matchy: If you're calling 2015 ancient you have some problems.
SeemsGood: I’m bringing my old, chubby Game Boy.
Matchy: Well, that is ancient.
SeemsGood: If you’re calling 1989 ancient you have some problems.
Matchy: Stop copying my lines!
SeemsGood: Fine.
(Cut to SeemsGood and Matchy walking toward the woods)
Matchy: So we’re just gonna walk?
SeemsGood: Not just walk. We do stuff.
Matchy: What kinds of stuff?
SeemsGood: You’ll see.
(They continue walking until they see five pathways ahead of them)
Matchy: Goddamn, which path do we take?
SeemsGood: Uh, the middle one? No, the one on the far left.
Matchy: Far left it is. (They take the leftmost path. Then they see another five pathways)
SeemsGood: Another one of these? Who’s trolling us?
Matchy: Nature, I guess. Uhh… let’s take the far right one. (They take the rightmost path)
(SeemsGood and Matchy see a sign that says ‘’Ha, you got fooled, bitches. Get lost!’’)
SeemsGood: Goddamnit.
Matchy: Now what?
SeemsGood: Climb on the tallest tree we can find.
Matchy: Do you even know how to climb?
SeemsGood: No.
Matchy: Me neither.
SeemsGood: Good, I don’t wanna look bad in front of anyone.
Matchy: Sooo… what now?
SeemsGood: I brought my trusty Sony Shitex GPS with me. We could use that.
Matchy: Phew. Thank god.
SeemsGood: Now, let’s see here… (turns on GPS)
GPS: In ten miles, turn right.
SeemsGood: Wait, this is a road GPS. Goddammit mom!
Matchy: Your mom is here?
SeemsGood: No.
Matchy: Oh.
SeemsGood: Hold on a sec… (turns off road mode on GPS) there.
GPS: To get to your target destination, walk twenty thousand miles west.
Matchy: Twenty-thousand?! Holy shit!
SeemsGood: We really are lost.
Matchy: How long will it take?
SeemsGood: Ten hours.
Matchy: I guess we'll have to walk the whole way back.
SeemsGood: Wait a second, I know a shortcut!
Matchy: And where’s the shortcu- (SeemsGood grabs her by the arm, running off the path to the west)
SeemsGood: This won't take long at all!
Matchy: I doubt that!
SeemsGood: Nah! (they stop at a spot) I think we’re close to the camp! (The spot is revealed to be a river leading to a waterfall) OH SHIT!
Matchy: Dammit, SeemsGood! 
(they realize they are too late to reach land and they are about to fall down the waterfall)
Matchy: (in a light voice) Oh look, SeemsGood! We’re f**ked! Unless you have anything useful in your bag!
SeemsGood: Sadly I don't. We're screwed. (Starts screaming, and Matchy does as well)
Matchy: Tell my mom she's an annoying little bi- (they splash into the water below)
SeemsGood: Phew. I guess we survived.
Matchy: Yeah. What does your GPS say?
GPS: Walk one thousand miles west to get to your destination.
SeemsGood: Looks like we're getting close.
Matchy: Where even are we?
GPS: Boogertown.
Matchy: Never heard of Boogertown.
SeemsGood: Hey, can we stop with the gross-out jokes? It's getting old.
Matchy: Yeah. But who gives a flying shit from Travis’ asshole, we will go back to it in the next episode.
SeemsGood: True. Anyways, let’s keep going.
Matchy: Hey, I see the town up ahead.
SeemsGood: We should probably walk around it.
Matchy: Good idea. (They attempt to walk around it, but a weird smelly hobo runs up to them.)
Hobo: lFJDKLFJELFJ?
SeemsGood: What?
Hobo: DFJSLKFJSDLKSDFJLKF!
Matchy: We have no idea what you’re even trying to say.
Hobo: WUT?
SeemsGood: Wait wut
Hobo: GIMME YOUR MONEY OR I’LL SUMMON TRAVIS ON YOUR ASSCHEEKS!
Matchy: Oh god.
SeemsGood: Run. (They start running, with the weird hobo on their tails)
Hobo: MONEY MONEY MONEY FOR ME!
SeemsGood: Rob a damn bank instead of forcing money out of foreigners!
Hobo: NO! FOREIGNERS STUPID ENOUGH TO GIVE MONEY!
Matchy: Should we hide?
SeemsGood: The woods are just up ahead. (They continue running, with the hobo still after them. Eventually they reach the woods and they stop.)
SeemsGood: (panting) I think we lost him.
Matchy: (panting) Yeah. How much longer until we get back to camp?
GPS: Walk twenty-five miles west to your destination.
SeemsGood: Oh thank f**king god. My vocal chords need a damn break.
Matchy: I’m dying here.
SeemsGood: We’re all out of water. Ugh… let’s finish walking (A few minutes later, they finally reach the camp)
Matchy: We made it!
SeemsGood: And it took only five hours… (passes out on the ground)
Matchy: Aw great, now I have to drag him all the damn way to his house.
(Cut to Matchy letting go of SeemsGood on her doorstep)
Matchy: There. Done. Now to… go home. (Walks home to see Bong on her doorstep)
Matchy: Bong? What are you doing here?
Bong: I changed my mind. I wanna go walk in the woods now.
Matchy: But I just got ho-
Bong: Let’s go! And bring SeemsGood with us. (drags Matchy by her feet)
Matchy: (moans) I wanna go hoooooome now.
(The End)
(post-credits scene. Bong is with Matchy and SeemsGood (who is still unconscious) and they enter Boogertown again)
Bong: You guys were here?
Matchy: Yeah. There was a hobo that- (the hobo suddenly pops up)
Hobo: HEY POOPS!
Bong: Oh shit.
(Proper end)
Category:Transcripts
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Category:Episodes
Category:2018
Category:2018 Episodes
Category:SeemsGood
Category:FireMatch
Category:Episodes written by FireMatch
Category:Episodes written by SeemsGood
Category:SBFW Campsite
Category:2010s