Hole in Peterson

==Characters==
ShubieNancy Suzy FishSadie RechidMartha SmithSallyHaroldUltra Wristwatch WomanJetpack WomanClothes Machine WomanFrontdesk WomanHusbandWifeTom Smith (mentioned)Tyler (mentioned)Sally’s children (mentioned) 
== Transcript ==
(Scene cuts to Shubie, Nancy, Martha and Sadie carrying some golf bags as they walk towards a country club)
Nancy: "Isn't today such a beautiful day for golf? Thanks for coming with me, ladies. This club only allows groups of four or more people to use the course." The women walk into the big building in front of the golf course.
Nancy: "Great Neptune! It's them!"
Shubie: "Who's them?" Nancy points at two women holding golf bags.
Nancy: "Why only the wealthiest and most successful women in the entire club! That woman over there flies her kids to school in jetpacks. And that woman on the right has a machine put on her clothes for her every morning. There's another woman that usually golfs with them too but I guess she's not here yet. Anyway, their kids are practically guaranteed to get into Whale. Their families have been going there for generations. If I can impress them on the golf course today and start golfing with them every week, Isabel would start hanging out with their kids and soon she'd be guaranteed to get into Whale too!" The women walk up to the front desk.
Woman: "Hello and welcome to our country club, the getaway for the richest of the rich. Do you have memberships here?"
Nancy: "No, none of us do."
Woman: "All nonmembers must go for a screening through The Finance Machine before they can enter."
Shubie: "The Finance Machine? What’s that?"
Woman: "It's a machine that determines how wealthy you are. One of our members, Sally, built it."
Shubie: "Sally's a member here?
Nancy: "Yeah, she’s been one for awhile." 
Martha: "Her dad must've gotten her a membership. That's what happens when you grow up in a wealthy household. Your parents give you all the money in the world. Trust me, I'd know after inheriting all that money from my parents."
Woman: "Please go through the machine one at a time. We can't let just anyone use our golf course. It's bad for our image." Nancy walks through the machine.
Machine: "Scanning... Scanning... Scanning complete! Status: upper middle class!" Martha walks through the machine.
Machine: "Scanning... Scanning... Scanning complete! Status: upper middle class!" Sadie walks through the machine.
Machine: "Scanning... Scanning... Scanning complete! Status: upper middle class!" Shubie walks through the machine.
Machine: "Scanning... Scanning... Scanning complete! Status: middle class!"
Woman: "This country club doesn't allow anyone who isn't at least upper middle class. I figured you weren't rich enough based on that trashy bikini you're wearing. I’m sorry but we can't let any hillbillies use our golf course. It could ruin our image."
Shubie: "Hillbilly?! I'm not a hillbilly! I'm just not rich!"
Woman: "Unfortunately it looks like you ladies won't be able to use the course today. The country club requires that you must have a group of four or more to use it."
Shubie: "Oh well, we can always just go to another golf course right girls?" Sally and a group of women walk into the building from the tennis courts.
Nancy: "Hey Sally! Do you want to play golf with us?"
Sally: "Sure thing!" Sally drops her tennis racket, pulls out a golf bag and walks over towards them.
Nancy: "Sorry Shubie, but getting Isabel into Whale is much more important." The women walk over to the golf course, leaving Shubie behind.
Woman: "I'm going to have to ask you to leave the clubhouse. If potential members see you here it could change their minds about joining and ruin our image too." Shubie walks out of the clubhouse.
Shubie: "Stupid stuck up country club. Why couldn't they just let me in? Why does it matter if I'm not rich? And this bikini is not trashy! Stupid Nancy, caring more about her daughter getting into some dumb university than her friends! I rented this golf bag and all of these clubs for nothing?!" Shubie drops a golf ball on the ground, pulls out her driver and swings in anger. The ball flies away.
Woman: "Ah! My mirror! Who did that?"
Shubie: "Uh oh." The woman walks closer to Shubie.
Woman: "Who broke my mirror?! I just got that car two days ago! It was brand new!"
Shubie: "Um, I did."
Woman: "You?!" The woman looks at her watch.
Woman: "Show me how far it is from here to my car." Her watch measures the distance.
Woman: "510 yards?! That's impossible!"
Shubie: "Maybe your watch is wrong."
Woman: "The Ultra Wristwatch is never wrong. It costs $55,000 for a reason."
Shubie: "Your watch costs $55,000?!"
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Of course it does. It does more than tell time. It can turn on all the electronics in my mansion, tell me exactly what disease my son has whenever he's sick, and even do my taxes! But enough about that, you just hit a ball over 500 yards! You must be an incredible golfer. How'd you like to go golfing with me and my friends today? We need a fourth person anyway."
Shubie: "Sure! Aren't you still mad at me for breaking your mirror though?" Ultra Wristwatch Woman laughs.
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Don't be ridiculous! When you have all the money in the world, getting that mirror fixed will be pocket change for me. I'll have it fixed in no time. In fact, I'll have my watch schedule a mechanic to come fix it while I golf today." Shubie and Ultra Wristwatch Woman walk into the clubhouse and up to the front desk.
Woman: "Oh hello! Playing another game of golf today?"
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Yep! Can't wait to get on the course on a beautiful day like today!" The woman laughs and notices Shubie.
Woman: "What are you doing here? Oh I'm so sorry that this imbecile is in clubhouse. I told her to leave several times but I guess she was just too stupid to understand. I'll call security right away."
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "No, don't call security. She's golfing with my group today."
Woman: "Oh, I'm sorry but you know the country club's policy on having peasants on the golf course. It could greatly damage our image. I'm afraid that I can't let her in."
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Hey, last time I checked you wanted my husband and I to write your children recommendation letters so that they can get into Whale, correct? Well you can kiss those acceptance letters goodbye if you don't let my friend onto the golf course. Maybe your kids would prefer going to community college."
Woman: "Community college?! With all of the hopeless rednecks?! Please anything but that! I want my children to have a future! They take violin lessons!" The woman turns off The Financial Machine. Shubie and the Ultra Wristwatch Woman walk onto the golf course. The woman who takes her kids to school in jetpacks looks at her watch.
Jetpack Woman: "Where is she? It's already 9:06. I told her that we were teeing off at 9 and you do know how terribly unhappy I get when we start late." 
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Sorry I'm late!" The other women gasp. 
Woman with the clothes machine: "What is that thing? She doesn't belong on the golf course."
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "This is my new friend, uh..."
Shubie: "Shubie."
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Shubie! Right! She's an amazing golfer. She hit a ball 500 yards in the parking lot earlier."
Clothes Machine Woman: "500 yards? But that’s impossible! Your eyes must've deceived you."
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Nope, my Ultra Wristwatch measured it and we all know that those are never wrong."
Jetpack Woman: "Well we do need an additional person in order to play. I suppose she can play with us. Let's see if she's really as good as you say she is." The ladies walk over to the tee. Ultra Wristwatch Woman gets up and hits the ball about 150 yards. Shubie goes next and hits it 200 yards. 
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Wow. How do you hit it so far, Shubie?" 
Jetpack Woman: "Oh, that's nothing. 300 yards." The woman hits the ball 300 yards. 
Shubie: "How'd you do that?" 
Jetpack Woman: "With my Driver 4000 of course. All I have to do is tell it how far I desire the ball to go and it automatically hits it that far. I don't even have to put any effort into my swing." 
Clothes Machine Woman: "Well, I have the Driver 4500! 400 yards." She hits the ball 400 yards into the woods. 
Shubie: "I guess it doesn't include accuracy." Shubie and the other women begin to laugh. 
(Scene cuts to Nancy, Martha, Sadie and Sally playing golf) Nancy hits the ball and it lands in the hole. 
Nancy: "Yes! That's a double bogey! Those women will definitely let me play with them once they see how great I am at golf!" Nancy looks up and sees the rich women playing at the hole in front of hers. 
Nancy: "Wait a minute, there are four women there..." Nancy sees the women laughing. 
Clothes Machine Woman: "Wow, Shubie, that birdie from the rough was quite impressive if I do say so myself!" 
Jetpack Woman: "Indeed! If your daughter can play the game of golf as well as you do, there's certainly a spot for her at Whale. Whale could always use an excellent golfer."
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "We should exchange numbers, Shubie. I would love to set up a play date between my son and your daughter."
Nancy: "What?! Shubie?! Whale?! So Shubie thinks that she can befriend those women and take my daughter's spot at Whale now? Well we'll see about that! No one's taking Isabel's spot!" 
Martha: "Nancy, are you okay?" 
Nancy: "Oh yeah, I'm fine! Martha, why don't you ride with Sally to the next hole?" 
Martha: "You want me to ride with Sally? You know how awkward it gets whenever me and Sally are alone." 
Nancy: "Well, maybe it's time for you and Sally to work things out. Me and Sadie did." 
Martha: "But..." 
Nancy: "Just get in the cart!" Martha gets in the cart with Sally. 
Sally: "So how are things going with Tom?" 
Martha: "Oh wouldn't you like to know." 
Sally: "Of course I would! I have to send my two kids over to your house every other weekend so that they can spend time with their father." 
Martha: "Oh yeah I'm sure that that's what this is about. Your children are so irrelevant that this is the first time they've ever even been mentioned! No one even knows their names!" 
Sally: "Still not as irrelevant as Tyler is." 
Martha: "One, that's not true. And two, don't even go there!" Sally and Martha drive away. Sadie and Nancy get into the other golf cart. 
Sadie: "Why did Sally and Martha go in the same cart? You know how awkward it gets between them. We'd better get to the next hole quick so things don't get any worse between them." 
Nancy: "Oh, we're not going to the next hole." 
Sadie: "Oh, do we have a flat?" 
Nancy: "No we don't have a flat! We're going to ruin Shubie’s chances at befriending those women. Look at her. She's having so much fun with her new rich friends." 
Sadie: "Yeah, that does look like fun. Why don't we just join them instead of trying to sabotage Shubie?" 
Nancy: "Are you crazy? I hate Shubie, and plus, those women wouldn't let just anyone play with them. You have to impress them first." 
Sadie: "Well clearly it mustn't take much to impress them if Shubie has." 
Nancy: "Quiet! We have to stop this. I'm not letting her daughter take Isabel's spot at Whale!" 
Sadie: "Well, what did you have in mind?" 
Nancy: "Uh, I don't know. Oh wait! We should sabotage her on the course! If she starts stinking it up out there, those women will never want to be her friends and won't help Susie get into Whale!" 
Sadie: "Well, I don't really have anything against Shubie. Except for the fact that she stole my husband! I’m in!" 
Nancy: "Wait what? Oh, forget it. Let's make this the worst day of her life!" 
(Scene cuts to Nancy and Sadie flattening one of Shubie's golf cart's tires) 
Nancy: "When those women come back to drive to the next hole, they won't be able to go anywhere!" 
Sadie: "Oh no! Nancy, they're coming!" Nancy and Sadie hide behind some bushes. 
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Nice eagle on that last hole Shubie." 
Shubie: "Thanks. Oh, drat. One of our tires is flat. Good thing the country club gave us a spare!" Shubie puts in the spare tire and drives away. 
Nancy: "Dang it!" 
(Scene cuts to Shubie hiting the ball right next to some woods) Nancy grabs the ball from behind the bush and throws it deep into the woods. 
Nancy: "She can't play if she can't find the ball!" Shubie goes down to find her ball. 
Shubie: "Hey where did my ball go?" 
Jetpack Woman: "Maybe it rolled off into the woods. Sometimes a gust of wind will push it into there." Shubie goes into the woods and finds her golf ball. Shubie hits the golf ball. The golf ball hits Sadie in the head.
Sadie: "Ow!" The ball flies straight into the hole. 
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Nice shot, Shubie!" 
(Scene cuts to Nancy chopping down a tree) 
Nancy: "She can't make get the ball in the hole if there's a tree covering it!" The tree falls on top of the hole. Harold walks by. 
Harold: "This tree can be the perfect experiment for my disintegrating ray!" Harold disintegrates the tree. A ball goes in the hole. 
Jetpack Woman: "Great shot, Shubie!" 
Nancy: "Harold! How did you even get in here? You're not wealthy enough for this country club." 
Harold: "I climbed the fence." Nancy storms away. 
(Scene cuts to Shubie putting) 
Nancy: "She can't make this if the green's flooded!" Sadie turns on a hose, and Nancy starts submerging the field. Shubie puts the ball and the water pushes it away from the hole.
Nancy: "Yes!" Clothes Machine Woman slips on the water.
Clothes Machine Woamn: "Gaah!" Clothes Machine Woman falls down and creates a huge splash that sends the ball into the hole. Nancy sprays water directly in Clothes Machine Woman's face before storming off. 
(Scene cuts to Nancy placing a stick of dynamite in Shubie's driver) 
Nancy: "This one will get her for sure." 
Sadie: "Isn't this going a little too far? Even I wouldn't do something like that to Shubie." 
Nancy: "Of course not, and plus, won't it be funny to see the driver explode! Ha ha ha!" Nancy's eye starts twitching. Sadie looks at her watch.
Sadie: "Oh, would you look at the time! I have to, uh, take care of the baby!" Sadie runs away. 
Nancy: "Fine! More fun for me!" Shubie and the other women walk by. 
Shubie: "I think I'll use my 9 iron for this hole." Shubie and the other women walk away, leaving the rest of their clubs in the golf cart. The golf cart explodes. 
Nancy: "That's it!" Nancy runs over to a nearby golf cart. Nancy takes a sock covering a golf club, rips three holes in it, and puts it over her face. Nancy then gets in the golf cart and drives toward the other women. 
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Watch out!" The women dive out of the golf cart's way. Nancy turns around and starts chasing them again. 
Shubie: "Run!" The women run away. Jetpack Woman pulls out a jetpack and flies away. Clothes Machine Woman dives into a sand pit. 
Clothes Machine Woman: "Hooligans! Now this top is ruined!" Ultra Wristwatch Woman runs past Shubie, and jumps into a golf cart. Ultra Wristwatch Woman starts driving away. 
Ultra Wristwatch Woman: "Shubie, get in!" Shubie tries to grab the back of the cart, but trips over a rock. Ultra Wristwatch Woman drives away. Shubie struggles to get up, and starts running away from Nancy. 
(Scene cuts to Harold walking by) 
Shubie: "Harold, watch out! There’s a maniac on the course!" 
Harold: "Aah!" Harold shots the disintegrating ray which disintegrates the golf cart. Nancy goes flying through midair and falls into the green she sprayed water in earlier. Nancy slides through the water, and towards a pregnant woman teeing off on the hole. 
Husband: "Okay honey, are you ready to reveal the baby's gender?"
Wife: "Yes! I'm so excited!" The woman covers her eyes with a blindfold and swings at the ball. Nancy slides in between her and the tee. The woman hits Nancy.
Nancy: "Gaahhhh!" Nancy flies away. The woman takes off her blindfold.
Wife: "It's a gaahhh?" Nancy flies into the woods and crashes into a hole in a tree. Nancy tries to get out of the tree but can't.
Nancy: "I'm stuck! Well at least I wrecked Shubie's game." A ball hits her in the face. 
(Scene ends)
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