Ryan Matthews

Disclaimer: While place descriptions and news events may coincide with the real world, all characters and the plot are fictional.
== Biography ==
=== Early Years ===
Ryan Jonathan Matthews was born and raised in Portland OR. 
He is the eldest son of David and Madeline (nee Matthews) Peters. At the age of 10, he was adopted by his mother's parents, Bill and Janet Matthews. His father, David Peters, has remarried and he has half-siblings in Alaska. His maternal grandparents have other children, including Bill Matthews Jr. 
Ryan remembers nothing before his adoption at age 10. His first memory is of walking down the courthouse steps with the Matthews. Janet took one hand, and Bill took the other, and they got into the car like that. He also has surprisingly few detailed memories of the years between 10 and 16. He has no memory of his 12th birthday. He knows "he loved his adopted parents and they loved him", and "he liked school". 
Bill and Janet Matthews retired from Portland to San Diego when Ryan was nearly 18, apparently exhausted by a job well done. He no longer has a direct phone number for them, and he has never been invited to visit them. He knows his adoptive parents had older children, but doesn't recall ever meeting them. He also has cousins living in Southern California, some of whom look like him, that he has never met. 
=== Abuse as a Child ===
When Ryan starts therapy with Dr Clarke on Thursday, October 22, 2020, he tells her that his earliest memory is of being adopted by the Matthews at age 10. He knows he was abused as a child - he has scars that look like he'd been beaten with a belt, broken bones he didn't remember getting, knife scars on his shoulder, as well as scars on his stomach that look like cigarette burns - but he only has loving memories of the couple who had taken him in, and knew they loved him. He feels they didn't deserve the wild teenager he became. 
==== Dissociative Amnesia and Memory Flashes ====
Ryan describes his memory as being like a kaleidoscope - all fragments, and then with a twist, a moment of clarity before dissolving back into fragments. Any memories of childhood foster homes or Child Protective Services (CPS) have been lost. 
===== Book 1: Stories We Tell =====
Ryan starts experiencing memory flashes. He ascribes the memory flashes to his six years of drug and alcohol addiction, but doesn't understand what triggers them. Dealing with them leaves Ryan with a migraine.
Around 4pm on Friday May 22, 2020 Ryan's first flash of memory is of himself, a younger self, wearing a tuxedo, but no hat. The next is of being leashed and kneeling at someone's feet.
Just before the start of the PSU Cabinet meeting at 8am on Friday May 29, Ryan has a flash of someone handing him a drink; of someone putting him in a taxi. This one he recognizes - it was of the night that Cage saved his life - but doesn't know what triggered it.
Early the following morning, Ryan has a nightmare of himself that feels like a memory: he's watching in a mirror as someone gives him lashes. He seemed to be older than 10, but doesn't have the dragon tattoo that he got when 16-years-old.
Thinking of Cage and his brothers on Monday morning, June 1, triggers a memory flash, audible rather than visual, of a young boy calling 'Ryan! Me go too!'. It's the first time he's thought he might have had a younger brother. He wonders how he can have forgotten that?
==== Therapy ====
===== Book 3: Don't Go =====
At Ryan's first therapy appointment at 2pm on Thursday, October 22, 2020, he tells Dr Clarke that he's still clean and sober, but worries that he's substituted sex instead. He's not been looking for a relationship or connection, or even really enjoying it, but it's like he can't stop. He tells her what Mrs Washington had said about Rafael being at the age when he needs to learn to attach, and wonders if perhaps that happened to him? Dr Clarke asks Ryan for his earliest memory, and Ryan tells her of the day he was adopted at 10-years-old. Dr Clarke is quietly horrified - she knows no other people who have no memories before the age of 10. Ryan says he realized that day how much he compartmentalizes things, just boxing them up and setting them aside to deal with later, and wonders how many of those boxes he just erased. He doesn't think he's erased any boxes since he was adopted though. Dr Clarke asks why he stayed in Portland when his parents moved. He says that he was in the party scene from the age of 16, and his parents were worried and angry. When it came time to apply for college he was accepted to Stanford, Harvard and University of Washington, but he wanted to stay in Portland for the party scene, so he enrolled at Portland Community College. His parents were angry, and his mom told him that she and his dad were retiring and going on a year-long cruise, and not returning to Portland. They set up a trust fund for Ryan, but only if he went to a 'four-year' school like Reed College. He chose PSU instead. They now live in San Diego, as they like the climate. Dr Clarke asks if he goes for holidays, and Ryan says he's not invited. He knows they have older kids of their own, and he'd be out of place. Dr Clarke asks if those older children had ever come to Portland for holidays while he was growing up? Ryan says he's not sure he's even met them, were they that ashamed of him? Ryan says he looked like someone's boy-toy in those days, his mom was horrified. The session ends with Dr Clarke suggesting a further appointment in 2 days time, with appointments every 2nd day for the following week. As Ryan leaves, Dr Clarke calls Janet Matthews in San Diego, and asks why she never told Ryan that they were his biological grandparents. Ryan inadvertently overhears this from outside the room, and returns. He says he didn't know that Dr Clarke knew his parents. Dr Clarke says she's never lied to him, but agrees she's also not told him everything. When Cage brought him to OHSU in 2017, she didn't realize that she'd seen him before until all his medical records arrived. By then, Ryan was making good progress and acting as if he didn't remember, so she didn't bring it up. She was the doctor that did the psychological assessment of Ryan and his adoptive parents for CPS when he was 10. She hadn't been aware that Ryan didn't know his true relationship to them, and wanted to check in with them and then discuss it at the next appointment. Dr Clarke tells Ryan that his adoptive parents are the parents of his mother, and that both parents are serving life in prison for the death of his younger brother, and the multiple assaults on Ryan. Ryan is stunned. Cage arrives, saying Emily told him to check on Ryan and drive him home. Ryan is in no condition to drive safely, but wants to return to the Washington's house for Rafael. Dr Clarke offers to have Ryan's case file ready at the next appointment.
Ryan arrives at OHSU at 8pm on Saturday for his next appointment, but finds it hard to go inside. He reminds himself that he has goals: to find Teresa; bring her back; and to make a home for her and Rafael; and he can't do that until he sorts himself out. Dr Clarke has his file on her desk, and tells Ryan they can take the therapy as fast or slow as he needs. Dr Clarke says she called Janet Matthews back, and she 'sends her regards'. While Janet has given verbal permission for Ryan to see the files, he's an adult and is entitled to see them anyway. Ryan asks why his grandparents retired to San Diego, and have never included him in their lives since? He tells her he talked to Martha Washington after their session on Thursday, as she'd worked at CPS and knew some of it. Mrs Washington had told him of his parents' convictions for murder, attempted murder, and other charges, and recommended he not google it. Dr Clarke says CPS had received reports from a teacher, a neighbor, and a doctor, but money talks. Ryan asks why he doesn't remember what happened between the age of 6 and 10. Dr Clarke says it's partly the way the system works, and is designed to protect parental rights over the safety and welfare of the children. Ryan could not be adopted while his parents trial played out, so after he was released from hospital, he was placed in the foster care system. There were 3 homes: the first was only a short stay as they had other children in care, and Ryan's nightmares made it impossible for him to stay; the second was also short, the home was inspected after Ryan regressed, all the children were removed and the foster parents jailed; the third family was working out, but the father was laid off then offered a job in the Midwest, and while they were willing to adopt Ryan, his mother refused to terminate her parental rights while her conviction was still on appeal. After that, Ryan was in a group home for about 6 months, until all appeals were exhausted and his mother allowed him to be adopted by her parents. Dr Clarke found him to be nearly catatonic when she evaluated him then. Dr Clarke had recommended that the state terminate Ryan's mother's rights so he could be adopted by the foster family, but was overruled. She was unhappy about him being adopted by his grandparents, but hoped they would allow her to see him regularly. His files don't show any therapy though. Ryan asks why he was cut out of their lives when they retired? Dr Clarke says that she's seen some photos, and Ryan has cousins who look just like him. Also, his mother was released on good behavior the year Ryan turned 18. She went with them on the cruise, and on the only occasion that his grandparents visited Ryan after they retired, she was in Portland for a parole visit and was sitting at another table in the same restaurant. Ryan is stunned, thinking that his grandparents chose his mother over him. The session ends at 9pm when Cage phones to says he's in jail.
Confused by his attraction to McShane despite his love for Teresa, Ryan goes to see Dr Clarke at OHSU without an appointment on Monday afternoon. Ryan is surprised when Dr Clarke agrees that McShane is an attractive man saying just because she's been married for 20 years doesn't mean she can't see, or doesn't look - but she values her commitment to her relationship more than the pleasure she might get elsewhere. It's about action, not desire. Ryan says that his previous question about sex addiction was because it was no longer satisfying, but he felt almost desperate to chase it more. Dr Clarke compares it to a hole in a bucket, and nothing can fill it. She observes that 1/ finding McShane attractive is not abnormal; 2/ it may be longer than usual since Ryan last had sex; and 3/ Ryan may have missed developing attachments when he was little, but in his case, it's made him want them to the point he feels needy, and he's used sex as a way to get at least temporary attachments. She tells him that there are other ways to get those attachment other than sex. It's natural to want to be touched, but Ryan could get a massage, go dancing, play touch football, or learn to give and receive hugs with friends, and none of these will violate his commitment to Teresa. It will take therapy to close that 'hole in his emotional bucket'. Before he leaves, Ryan mentions his financial trust, and that he had recalled that the reason the Matthews set up the trust fund was that Ryan wasn't yet 18. Dr Clarke suggests he make a further appointment for the next day to discuss that, and about the lab report that he had asked be sent to the PSU Provost. Sitting in his car outside OHSU Ryan feels the desire for connection, but thinks about Teresa and realizes that what he truly wants is a family with Teresa and Rafael, and it is worth postponing pleasure until they can be together again. He goes home to Rafael, leaving Emily and Cage to deal with EWN for the evening.
The next afternoon, Ryan tells Dr Clarke that he sees the Washingtons as a model of the family he wants, and she reminds him there's a lot of compromise and sacrifice needed to create that. He already has created pieces of that dream though, with his housemates at the Loft, and with the staff at EWN. He's not a loner, he has meaningful attachments to people. Ryan thinks about that and says that even so, he doesn't feel connected - so it's the feeling part that's broken. Dr Clarke is pleased to hear of his thoughts after the previous afternoon's session, and says working on delayed gratification won't hurt.
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In a later hypnosis session, Dr Clarke says Ryan gave his brother's name as David, and remembered that at Christmas when he was 6, he had bought his brother a red fire engine at Finnegan's toy store, and then his mother and grandmother took him to see Santa. 
=== Education ===
Ryan started college as a freshman in Fall Term 2014 at Portland Community College.
In Fall 2015, he transferred to Portland State University as a sophomore. He is majoring in Media Studies and Political Science, and he is part of the Honors College. 
Ryan is unsure where his future lies, although at one time he had thought about Urban Studies (a multidisciplinary field focusing on the fabric of cities and the culture, society, and economy particular to cities and to those who live within them). Andrew McShane thinks Ryan has a career in academia - perhaps as a future president of PSU. Cage sees Ryan as a future politician. 
His classes have been diverse and include:
* a class in Criminal Justice about policing; Management; Psychology; a couple of classes in Anthropology; two years of Latin Honor's seminars as well as a year of Greek; and a class from Dr Lopez in Sociology;
* the Religion department's class on the Bible, expecting that would help him understand evangelical Christians and politics; 
* he started learning Spanish when he was seeing Teresa in 2016, and went home with her that Christmas, but found he liked the language so kept studying it;
* in Spring 2017, an Honors class about fertility symbols in pre-colonization Mexico from Professor Ian Black;
* in 2018, an advertising class to help prepare himself for the role of EIC. He also asked Dr Maria Lopez to supervise a one-on-one project for him that year, updating the data and assessing progress on a 2012 report on the Honor's College;
* in 2019 he took an honors seminar on immigration policy;
* in Fall 2020, he has a class at 2pm on Wednesdays; and an 8:30am honors seminar in Homosexuality in Ancient Greek and Roman Culture on Thursdays
* In late October 2020, Ryan submits his honors thesis titled: Dreamers, the Children Without A Country, together with the final paperwork required for graduation.
* in Winter 2021, while awaiting graduation, he takes an honors class in Men's Rights, as well as a class in historical research methods.
In December 2020, he is considering enrolling for his master's degree at Reed College, Portland.
=== Eyewitness News ===
In Spring 2017, Ryan joined the News 101 class at Eyewitness News. After completing that class, he continued working there as a reporter covering student government and university administration, then rose to news editor and then editor-in-chief. He doesn't do on-camera work.
Ryan has found university politics fascinating since he first starting reporting for EWN and realized that the university is run by people - most of them white men - scrabbling for their own personal power. He sees higher education administration in much the same terms as dominance displays at a BDSM club. He religiously reads the Chronicle of Higher Education, and studies the people in power at PSU. Emily Andersen swears "he must do nothing but wander around all day and gossip."
At the start of Spring 2019, Ryan is appointed editor-in-chief for Eyewitness News at Portland State University. The EIC position is usually only held for one year, but due to the impact of COVID, in February 2020 the Media Board ask him to re-apply and appoint him for a further year. 
When the governor of Oregon issues a stay-at-home order for COVID-19 in March 2020, Ryan convinces the PSU Cabinet that EWN should be viewed as an essential service and allowed to stay in operation. 
==== Book 1: Stories We Tell ====
Ryan publishes an editorial on Friday May 22, 2020 on why the COVID dead - as well as the military dead - need to be honored on Memorial Day. He and Cage Washington pick up drinks and snacks for a popup party in the Crow's Nest.
On Tuesday May 26 Ryan works with Gregory Washington to estimate EWN's revenue for the summer budget.
The EWN leadership is summoned to a PSU Cabinet meeting in the President's conference room at 8am the following day. Ryan asks Cage to take his story about the virtual remembrance on Memorial Day.
Ryan, Cage and Emily attend the PSU Cabinet meeting on Friday May 29. When Dr Davis asserts that EWN has gone beyond the campus in their coverage, and that must stop, Ryan presents Cage's Memorial Day story, and tells Dr Davis that the proper avenue for complaints is through the Media Board. He cites the Charter about the university being expressly prevented from editorial content decisions, or from using them as a funding criteria. There is also case law upholding First Amendment provisions. Provost McShane asks if they intend to continue to cover the downtown protests, and Ryan responds that they always have.
That evening, Ryan picks up Cage and Turk at Lan Su Chinese Garden. Turk is dropped off at the Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, and Cage and Ryan return to EWN so Cage can upload his files. After Cage returns to the protest, Ryan reads Twitter feeds, and writes copy for the TV anchors to read. 
At 1am on Saturday, Ryan sends Emily home, followed by Karin and Jason. Miguel stays to continue downloading files and editing video.
When Cage and Turk return to EWN at 3am, Ryan finds them towels and clothing so they can shower off tear gas residue. Afterwards, Cage asks Ryan if Turk can stay 'upstairs', as public transport is shut down. Ryan agrees and asks Turk to call him the following day. Ryan, Ben, Miguel, Corey, and Cage discuss what will happen if the protests continue beyond the end of the Spring term. Ryan feels that stopping coverage would harm their credibility as an objective source of news. However, if they continue, it's a commitment to continue forever.
Ryan arrives at the Loft at 4am. Kevin Tighe and Pete Madison have waited up for him. Ryan tells them of the discussion about EWN expanding to year-round broadcast, and Kevin agrees it probably should be done, but asks about finances and what Ryan he personally wants to do, Is he willing to commit the time? After offering to find safety gear for the EWN staff covering the protests, Kevin goes to bed, leaving Ryan with Pete. Pete wants to talk about Claire, and Ryan tries to explain Claire's need to be dominated, then goes to bed. He has a nightmare about a BDSM scene about being whipped which was not unexpected. The second nightmare he doesn't understand, although it feels like a memory.
Before going into the newsroom that afternoon, Ryan talks to Kevin Tighe about Turk's encounter with tear gas the previous night. Kevin goes down to the Loft's basement and comes up with sacks of clean towels and sweats to be kept in a locker at EWN. Ryan also buys bottled water and energy bars to keep in the Crow's Nest. Emily is already at EWN when Ryan arrives with coffee. They discuss the prospect of a 365-day broadcast. Ryan is not sure he's strong enough to lead the change. Emily reminds him EWN currently has the best leadership team she's ever seen there, and asks about Ben's availability over summer break. When Ben arrives, Ryan goes into his office to talk to him about the expense side of the EWN budget. Ben gives him a spreadsheet of EWN expenses, that shows their cost/day actually decreases, as annual expenses would be divided by 365 instead of 210.
Later that afternoon, Cage asks Ryan if a gate can be installed at the counter as he is concerned about Emily's safety while she's alone in the newsroom. Ryan offers to talk to Kevin Tighe about it. Ryan shows Cage the locker filled with clean towels and sweats supplied by Kevin, and tells him that EWN will give sanctuary to the independent reporters. Ryan tells Cage that EWN will give sanctuary to independent journalists covering the Black Lives Matter protests downtown on the following conditions: 
# they must be escorted into EWN by Cage or Turk, or be buzzed in them; and 
# they have to be gone by 9am when the ad office opens, or wait until 2pm when Emily arrives.
On Monday morning, June 1, Ryan arrives to find Gregory already at work, and they talk about the proposal to expand to a 365-day coverage. Ryan wants to know if it can be done on advertising dollars alone, as there is no prospect of an increased allocation of student fees. Gregory wants to know why Ryan wants the expansion. Ryan speaks of Cage's vision, and the way he feels journalism is failing because it covers politics like it does football; that journalism is important, and what Cage does may be a model for a new way of storytelling. Gregory summarizes it as that EWN can be 'an incubator for experimental forms of journalism'. He will pitch it to EWN's bigger advertisers, like banks, insurance, online businesses, and have estimates available by noon the following day, but notes EWN is presently in surplus for the year.
When Emily arrives at EWN that afternoon, Ryan is in his office, and she tells him that the mayor has asked the governor to send in the National Guard. Ryan and Cage argue about how to cover the protests that night. Ryan is worried about Cage's safety, and wants him back by 9pm but Cage insists on returning to the protest after the 10pm broadcast, Emily asks "Are we journalists, or aren't we?"
Late that night, Cage tells Ryan what Turk said about safety equipment, and Ryan tells him to order it from Amazon through the Foundation account, As they leave for the night, Cage asks Ryan if they can really expand to a 365-day coverage; Ryan replies he has no doubt they can, only if they should, if they have the income for it. He asks if it's what Cage wants to do; Cage replies that it's what they must do.
When Ryan arrives at EWN at noon on Tuesday, he signs off on Cage's purchase order for safety equipment, then meets with Gregory about the income the next budget. Gregory estimates EWN is $30k short of being able to cover the cost of the proposed broadcast extension to 365 days. When Ryan reviews the spreadsheet, he notices that there is no income from the Alumni Office, and Gregory says they won't advertise with EWN. Ryan goes back to his office and calls Joel Parkinson and they discuss the Matthews Trust Fund making an anonymous offer to Alumni Affairs of $30k of matching funds for EWN to run an image campaign directed at current students. He then drafts a memo informing the Media Board of EWN's intent to stay on-air year around.
By 2pm, Ryan has emailed a draft of the memo to John Cooper, asking for his input before sharing the memo with the EWN leadership. He also considers getting input from Kevin Tighe but is concerned that gossip might beat memo to either the Media Board, or PSU administration. He thanks Kevin and Pete Madison for installing the childproof gate at the front counter, and calls John Cooper. John says it's a very logical and well laid out plan, but reminds Ryan that what EWN brings to the media world is a creative approach to news. They should only go ahead if doing so will be 'the most fun thing ever'. Ryan doesn't want to release the memo until after the Student Fee Committee's final meeting the following night. John says he fully supports Ryan.
At the 4pm editors' meeting, Ryan talks to the leadership team about his conversation with John Cooper, and sends them all a copy of the draft memo to review. 
The following afternoon, Gregory catches Ryan as he enters the EWN building. The Student Fee Committee are scheduled to meet that evening from 7pm-9pm, and Gregory wants Ryan to be available online in case he is needed to speak. Gregory then says Alumni Affairs contacted him that morning wanting to plan out a $60k media buy for the following year, and the contract is already signed. Gregory gives Ryan a USB drive with a revised budget, which Ryan says he will append to the memo approved by the leadership team the previous night. He emails a copy to Gregory to review, as well as to Robert Smithson and Sam Bartholomew, and gets responses back from them.
During the editors' meeting Ryan mentions John Cooper's Zoom meetings, and wonders if they could do the daily editors' meeting the same way. Corey complains he's been wanting that for the past 3 months, and Ryan suggests a trial run the following day.
After returning from a run later that afternoon with Joanna Montgomery, Ryan listens in to the Student Fee Committee virtual meeting. The committee proposes a resolution to censure EWN for expanding coverage beyond campus. Gregory reminds the committee it's outside their scope, and the budget has already been approved by both them and the Board of Trustees. He establishes that the issue isn't about leaving campus, but about the protests being covered, and that a resolution on that would be illegal. There's a call for a vote that fails 4-3, followed by a move to adjourn. Ryan goes downstairs to thank Gregory personally. Thinking about the meeting, he recalls that the students there in person had not been masked.
Later that evening, Corey and Ryan are in the newsroom watching Cage's live stream. Ryan wonders who starts the nightly fights? Is it the protestors or do the cops just arbitrarily declare a riot and attack those who are slow to leave? Suddenly Cage goes down. Turk calls and says that they're headed back to EWN. Ryan talks Corey through how to handle an emergency like this, stepping through the process. They wait in the EWN foyer for Turk and Cage to arrive. Ryan takes Cage's gear from Turk, then helps Cage upstairs to a hot shower. Afterwards, Ryan checks Cage's back and is relieved that the skin is unbroken, and Cage has no broken bones. He panics thinking that Cage could have died, and that would be too high a price. He feels incapable of being the strong person who leads EWN to the next level, but Cage tell him that he is confident that Ryan can, but only if Ryan decides he wants to. Cage would be going down to report on the protests anyway, even if it meant freelancing or going independent. This is his story, and he can't let it go, and Ryan accepts that. Corey arrives to pick up Cage, and Ryan helps him dress. They agree to meet at 10am the next day. 
When Ryan gets home to the Loft, Kevin, Pete and Claire are waiting up for him. Ryan tells them he's a coward, but Pete says that he always thought it was harder to be the commander and send troops into battle than it was to be part of the troops. A soldier has a mission, someone to tell him what to do, and he does it. But the commander knows that to accomplish the mission he has to put his people at risk. It's the toughest job there is. Kevin says that Ryan is gifted with a great imagination, which is what makes him a good reporter. He can see all aspects of the story, get inside someone's head and see the world through their eyes. And that's what makes that night so terrifying for Ryan, he can see all the things that could have gone wrong, but also because of that he can do an amazingly quick and thorough triage. On the fly, with no experience, Ryan did everything right, and Kevin is proud of him. Pete says he would sign up and work for him anytime.
When Cage arrives at 10am on Thursday June 4, Ryan is already at EWN looking through Cage's video feed from the previous night, trying to find 'who throws the first stone'. Cage finds that idea interesting and agrees to help. Ryan has already emailed a memo to Dr Stewart about the proposed broadcast extension, and she calls him to discuss it. Ryan assures her the financials are accurate, that EWN alumni are in support, and that PSU needs to be in a position to help rebuild Portland after COVID. Dr Stewart forwards the email to the Media Board, and to Provost McShane, with a cover note that it has her approval.
By that afternoon Ryan has received draft copies of both Dr Stewart's and John Cooper's recommendations to the Media Board, and shared them with at the editor's meeting. When Ryan receives an email summons from Provost McShane, he heads to the PSU administration building. Ryan has never let on that he knew the Provost as 'Master A' in the night world. He defends EWN's decision to extend their broadcast to a full year as an editorial decision. McShane questions Ryan about the advertising from Alumni Affairs, but Ryan assures him EWN has a signed contract. McShane threatens to shut down EWN, and takes Ryan's response as a threat, asking if Ryan plans to blackmail him. Ryan says that as the Board of Trustees would have to approve a change to the charter. and student control of content results in the university being protected from legal liability, he's just using common sense not blackmail. Ryan assures McShane that he will never tell others of McShane's private life. He repeats his belief that PSU needs to be in a position to help rebuild Portland after COVID. McShane agrees to present the proposed broadcast extension to President Byrd at the Cabinet meeting the following day with his approval as Provost. They walk out together, encountering Cage and Emily standing outside. Emily, Cage, and Ryan race each other back to EWN.
==== Book 2: Choose ====
Shortly before the start of the evening news broadcast on Monday October 12, 2020 Ryan follows Rochelle, McShane's granddaughter, from the Green Room clad in only jeans, going to his office for a shirt before returning to Emily to ask about stories for the night. He notices a story from J.J., and Emily introduces him to Sarah King, who started as a new copy editor earlier that day. Emily says that Sarah is Ryan's 'new goddess', and he must do everything Sarah wants to make her happy. He flirts, but Sarah says he's not her type, and she'd be happy with a diet Coke. At midnight, Cage makes Ryan walk Sarah and Emily to the TriMet station.
On arriving at EWN on Wednesday, Ryan teases Cage about his crush on Emily, then invites him into the EIC office to discuss what happened with the Crow's Nest.
At the editors' meeting with Ryan, Cage, Emily, Lam, Joe, and Sam on Thursday, Sarah shares that J.J.'s father is an officer with PPB. No one has concerns other than for J.J.'s mental health. Ryan points out that Cage, as a big Black man with a video camera and press pass, is exposed by his work covering the protests. Cage says that's what it means to be a Black man in America - if things go bad, the police shoot the nearest Black man. That's why there is a Black Lives Matter movement. Ryan praises Lam for the Folio issue that morning. After Cage leaves, Sarah asks Ryan if there really is a literary magazine, or if that's just a front for the Crow's Nest? Ryan says the Portland Review is a fine literary magazine, and invites her to the party the following night to meet Robert Smithson.
That evening Miguel calls Ryan and asks him to pick up Cage, Carroll and Turk at Keller Fountain park. Ryan arrives about 30min later in his Prius. Cage puts Turk and Carroll in the back seat, then sits in front. Ryan says the roads are blocked, so they have to go the long way around. Carroll tells Cage they saw the van again, it had the same plates. When they get to EWN, Cage gets everyone in the elevator while Ryan parks.
Will, Cage, Emily and Ryan meet in the EIC's office to talk about Carroll's story. Will asks to interview Turk and Carroll, and Ryan defers to Emily to decide if Will can be trusted with the new use for the Crow's Nest.
When a group of men claiming to be police arrive at midnight wanting to search the building, Ryan sends Miguel upstairs to get Cage and Will. while he speaks to the men via intercom. The men claim to be looking for fugitives from the protests, and want EWN's video footage, to shut them down for streaming for the night, and to question the staff. Ryan refuses to allow them entry without a warrant. The man say they don't need a warrant as they're in pursuit. Ryan ask who they are pursuing, the men say 'the fugitives'. Ryan asks for names, are they EWN staff? And the men won't say. Will writes a note to Ryan, saying police have to identify themselves individually, giving name, badge number and agency. Cage asks Corey to tape the exchange, and Corey says he's been recording sound and video since the intercom button was pressed. Cage tells Miguel to take all the video from the night up to the Crow's Nest, and has Emily start making backups. The recording is on EWN's server and on the cameras, and Emily suggests backing up to the workstation upstairs, then taking that off the network. Cage says they need to police-proof the newsroom, anything that could get anyone arrested, including cleaning out Joe's locker. Joe says he flushed his stash as soon as the police arrived. Ben goes to check lockers. Prof Cooper calls Emily back, saying that he and an attorney are downstairs, but don't want the front door opened. Emily says Ryan can go down the fire exit. The door alarm was disabled years earlier so the smokers could use the fire stairs landing. She tells him Ryan will meet them at the corner. Cage asks Ryan for a quote as he's going to broadcast live, and records Ryan making an intro. Bianca is impressed that Ryan can improvise the intro off the cuff. Cage says Ryan is good on his feet, would be a sensation on camera, and doesn't know why Ryan generally refuses. Ben suggests they call campus police, Ryan replies that he'll ask Cooper about it and goes out the fire door and down to the street. After being introduced to Karen Young, Ryan briefs her on what the police have said, that they won't show a warrant, give their names or badge numbers, or identify their agency. She heads around the corner into 11th Ave with Ryan and John close behind. She stops about 15ft from the EWN entrance, where 5 men in black tactical gear are standing around the intercom. Ryan and Cooper remain silent while Karen introduces herself as an attorney representing EWN and its staff, and covers the legal obligations if wanting to enter the building. The team leader repeatedly refuses to comply, and asks who Ryan and Cooper are. One of the men shines a torch in their faces, and Ryan hears a taser engage. The team leader and men finally turn and head toward an unmarked dark van. Ryan moves after them, to see the plate. He only gets the letters, but they match the ones given by Carroll. Cooper says he's been recording the conversation, and Ryan laughs and says EWN has been recording and broadcasting since the men showed up. Karen says the men weren't PPB, and asks if Ryan knows who they are. Ryan says he's not sure they're legitimate police, but the van has been harassing protesters and journalists since the previous summer, and that's why he wanted to see the plates. How likely is it to have two vans with the same letters chasing people? Ryan thanks Karen and Prof Cooper for coming, and they leave. Ryan returns to the newsroom and tells the others he doesn't want the newsroom vacant until things are resolved. He waits for Sarah to come down in the elevator with Cage, then drives her home.
Once the editors' meeting starts on Saturday afternoon, Ryan runs through minor agenda items smoothly, then introduces discussion on the protests, the attempted raid, and what happens next. Ryan asks J.J. to team with Carroll and Turk that night in reporting the protests, then introduces the issue of the blackmail photos sent to Carroll. Carroll consents to the photos being shown to those at the meeting. Corey turns around a big screen monitor, and Ryan warns the photos are disturbing, and may be a trigger for some. The decision to publish is unanimous.
Early the next morning, Ryan arrives at OHSU to find out about J.J. and Sarah. Cage is asleep in the waiting room. Dr Clarke walks out, and asks why Ryan is there, is he OK? Ryan explains he's now EIC of EWN, and she's treating one of his videographers. Dr Clarke assures him Sarah mostly just needs rest, and will need to use a wheelchair for a week or so, until she can see her own doctor. Cage wakes and says he'll see to Sarah. Dr Clarke says J.J. is more difficult, he's on a 72hour psych hold and is still not really coherent. Sarah seems able to deal with him better than Dr Clarke can. Cage says his father has offered to let J.J. live there, and Dr Clarke says she would be happy to release J.J. to Rev Washington. Dr Clarke says she had to inform J.J.'s parents he was at OHSU, as he's still on their insurance. She talked to his mother, who was hysterical with relief, as he hadn't been home since Friday afternoon. As J.J. refuses to talk to them, or about them, Dr Clarke knows very little about what's happened. J.J.'s parents are expected to arrive at 9am. Cage tells Ryan that J.J's dad won't have arrived home from work yet. He tells Dr Clarke she may need to watch EWN's live feed from the previous night - the cop who shot J.J. was his own father. He tells Dr Clarke he will return at 2pm for Sarah, and can take her home then if she's ready for release. Ryan tells Dr Clarke to put Sarah in a wheelchair in the waiting room when J.J.'s parents arrive, then take Mrs Jones into her office to talk. Sarah can talk to Lt Jones, she's tough enough to handle him. Dr Clarke says that gives her a place to start. As Ryan leaves, she tells him to come back to see her soon.
That afternoon, Ryan shows up at EWN with 3 pizzas. Turk has been released from jail, saying no charges were pressed. Carroll asks where J.J. is. Ryan reviews what happened to the point a cop shot at Carroll, then reveals the cop was J.J.'s father, and that J.J. was at the hospital after attempting suicide. Staff are shocked and angry, Carroll is crying. Prof Cooper arrives, and sits chatting with Sarah and answering questions. He asks Carroll if they are sure they want to go ahead and publish the photos, as it will be a controversial story. Will asks if Sarah Gilligan can come, as he thinks he has a name of one of the men. He'd like to interview her and Carroll for a follow-up story. The man Will identifies is a former sheriff deputy from Clackamas county, the van belongs to his sister. Carroll calls her mom, and says she will bring their attorney. Cooper calls the provost 15 minutes before they go to air. As they go live, a reporter from The Oregonian calls, asking from a quote from Carroll. Ryan tells him there will be a press conference on the steps of the Justice Center the following morning. Ryan tells Cage to take Sarah home, saying he might drop in to see J.J. for a bit when he leaves. As Cage wheels her out, Emily thanks Sarah for saving J.J.'s life. Ryan talks to Prof Cooper, who says McShane isn't happy, but that's OK. Ryan asks if Prof Cooper wants to visit J.J., and he says he'll go during visiting hours the following day. He asks if J.J. has somewhere to stay when released, and Ryan tells him of Rev. Washington's offer. Ryan, Will and Carroll go down to the business office's conference room on the ground floor to await Sarah Gilligan.
==== Book 3: Don't Go ====
At 4pm on Tuesday, October 20, 2020 Ryan is in his office, avoiding checking the 34 voicemails on his phone, one of which he assumes is from the Provost about Will's stories. Teresa Valdez arrives with Rafael. She hands Rafael to Ryan, telling him that Rafael is his son. She tells him she left three years earlier, not because she didn't want to be with him, or because she didn't want to raise their son together, but because some of her family are not legally resident in the US and she was needed at home. However the day before, a court had ordered that she must be arrested and locked in an Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) detention center until she can be deported to Mexico. As Rafael is a US-born citizen, with Ryan's name on his birth certificate, she leaves Rafael with Ryan where she knows he will be safe. She leaves the newsroom. Emily takes Rafael, and orders Ryan to go after Teresa.
Emily tells Ryan he needs to answer three questions:
# What does he want?
# What's best for Rafael in the short and long term?
# How can they find and help Teresa?
Cage says he and Sarah are going to dinner with his parents to talk about J.J., who is due to be released the next day. He suggests Emily, Ryan and Rafael join them. His parents will have useful ideas, and if Ryan wanted, may be willing to take Rafael in. Cage says his mom is putting food on the table at 6pm, Emily demurs but Ryan says he needs her there - Miguel and Will can run the newsroom for the evening. Cage calls Will, Miguel and Ben into the EIC's office, then steps out to call his mother. Ryan lays out the plan for the evening. Will gulps a bit before nodding, Ben and Miguel just look at each other and shrug. They discuss the stories coming in that night. When Lam Deng arrives, Emily calls him in. Cage tells them they have to go, his mother will not be fine if they're late. Ryan says Emily can ride with him, then realizes he doesn't have a car seat for Rafael. Emily says they can stop at Target on the way back, and get whatever Mrs Washington says they need. In the meantime, she will sit in the back seat with Rafael, and strap them both in. As they leave, Emily asks Ryan what language Rafael speaks. Ryan asks Rafael his age in both English and Spanish, and he responds to the Spanish.
6pm Cage, Sarah, Emily, Ryan and Rafael join Clyde and Martha Washington for dinner at the Portsmouth parsonage at 6pm. Rev Clyde asks about J.J.'s PSU classes, and EWN participation. Ryan says he's fine with J.J. returning to EWN, as long as Cage is. Mrs Washington asks about J.J.'s classes, Ryan says the chance of the university noticing he's not attending courses is slim to none.
As they are leaving, Emily gets a text from Miguel, saying that EWN received a call from ICE looking for Teresa. Ryan tells her to call Professor Cooper, and ask him to call the Provost. Ryan wants the Provost at EWN for a conversation that night, as ICE could jeopardize the future of a lot of PSU students, and possibly PSU itself. When McShane and Cooper arrive about 9pm, Ryan meets with them in the conference room on the ground floor. He tells them that ICE had called wanting the whereabouts of a former student who worked at EWN four years previously. What had alarmed Ryan was that they called just three hours after she dropped by the newsroom for a visit. McShane asks if EWN has undocumented students writing for them, and Ryan says no one on the payroll is undocumented, but doesn't know if there may be a volunteer, or student in the News 101 class - McShane would know that better than them. When Teresa was on staff, she was paid and had a social security card and proof of birth; Miguel is Hispano; Joe Castro is 3rd-generation. McShane asks how ICE knew Teresa was there, and Ryan says that's why he's so concerned. Cooper asks why Teresa was there, and Ryan says that he and Teresa had been a couple while she was at EWN, and she had come by to introduce him to his son. He tells them of the immigration status of Teresa and her family. He fears that ICE may not accept their denial of knowing her current whereabouts, and put pressure on the university or EWN. For example, they may audit the university's enrollment and student employment. McShane agrees it would be time consuming, but PSU should be well within tolerance. Ryan says that if Teresa had been aware she was undocumented, she would have applied for DACA while she was at PSU. Prof Cooper asks what Ryan is doing with his son, and he replies that Cage Washington's parents have taken them under their wing. McShane asks if ICE wants the boy, but Ryan says they made no mention of that, and Teresa was pretty clear about his citizenship. McShane thanks Ryan for alerting him, and tells him that if ICE contact again, don't answer any questions, have them call McShane and tell them any interview will need to be conducted in the presence of the university attorney. When McShane leaves, Cooper asks Ryan about the tension between him and McShane. Ryan agrees it's 'old stuff', and Cooper offers to listen if Ryan wants to talk about more than EWN matters. As Ryan watches Cooper leave, he sees a car parked down the street, facing the EWN front door. He uses the intercom in the foyer to ask someone to bring down a camera with a long lens. When Joe Castro comes down, Ryan asks him to take a picture of the plates on the car. Joe says the lighting isn't good, but steps outside for a better angle. The car starts up, and Joe takes several shots as it goes by. Ryan asks him to give any useful photos to Will, who can get someone to run the plates.
Ryan arrives at EWN at 4pm the following day looking shell-shocked and like a migraine is starting. He asks Cage and Emily to meet in his office, and asks for Will who is expected in about 10min. He asks Sarah and Lam to hold down the fort, and send in Will when he arrives. He tells Cage and Emily about the car the previous night, and that he's concerned it's ICE. Will arrives and Ryan asks if Miguel gave him the photo of the vehicle plates from the previous night. Will says the number on the plate was clear, but the report came back as blocked. Will thinks it's the feds, as his friend who works for Campus Security is spooked. His gut feeling is that it's ICE. Cage tells Ryan to go through everything Teresa gave him, they need a string to pull if they're going to find her and bring her home. Emily tells Ryan that if he has a migraine, he needs to go home while he can still drive. Ryan says he wants to read Teresa's papers first, then lock them up in the office before he leaves. The papers include a thumb-drive and Teresa's journal, Rafael's birth certificate, and a document giving Ryan parental authority. Emily returns and tells him she'll drive him home, he can catch the bus in the following day. She also tells him to figure out who will be Rafael's guardian, if something should happen to Ryan. When they arrive at the Portsmouth parsonage, she tells him to contact Dr Clarke first thing, he needs to be in top form, and she has a bad feeling about all this. She helps him out of the car and to the front door, which is opened by Rev Washington, who supports Ryan and wishes her a safe journey home. Rev Washington finds him some Excedrin for his migraine. Ryan asks if Rafael is asleep, and says if he is, he'll join him.
After dropping Rafael with Bianica and catching a train to PSU on Thursday morning, Ryan walks to his first class [probably in Cranmer Hall]. Provost McShane joins him and they walk together. McShane tells him he is proud of what Ryan has accomplished, the Honors College thinks highly of his scholarship, and his leadership at EWN has been exemplary. So he's giving Ryan a heads-up that Professor Black will be back teaching in Winter term, but has already opened his office on campus. After class, Ryan writes a paper about homosexuality among women in the Greek and Roman empires, then calls Dr Clarke's office to make an appointment for 2pm that day. He walks to EWN and talks to Gregory in the advertising office. Bianica told Gregory that Rafael is the perfect age for John Lewis, and Ryan agrees they quickly became friends. Gregory again offers to pay Ryan the commission on the advertising buy from Alumni Affairs, he knows Ryan will have unplanned expenses with Rafael, as well as childcare and rent to both the Washingtons and the Loft. While Ryan doesn't need the commission, he agrees to accept it so that his personal finances remain private. Ryan signs Gregory's paperwork, then goes up to his own office in the empty newsroom to read Teresa's journal. Emily arrives at 11:30am with nachos, just as Ryan finishes reading. He gives the journal to Emily to take home and read. They talk about Teresa's situation, then Emily asks about whether EWN can go after the ICE story, or if they have vulnerable staff to protect. Ryan assures her that the payroll list is solid within the constraints of student privacy. He offers to send out a general staff alert before the ICE story is run. Emily tells him of Joanna's response to the question of whether ICE was in their neighborhood. Ryan leaves to go to his appointment with Dr Clarke at OHSU.
While driving Ryan from OHSU to Portsmouth, Cage talks about the ICE protest, and about Sarah as a roommate. Ryan is shutting down, but tells him Emily has Teresa's journal to read, and he would like Cage to read it too. Ryan says he'll send out an email to staff the next day about Cage's ICE story. When they reach the house, two white men in suits approach them in the street, asking for the whereabouts of Teresa Valdez or Rafael Valdez. Ryan asks them if they have a warrant or ID. The ID shows they are ICE agents. Ryan tells them they will need a warrant, and to speak to his attorney. Cage opens the door for Ryan, then shuts and locks it behind him. Rev Washington is waiting inside, and tells Ryan that Rafael is in the back yard with Martha. Ryan agrees to eat dinner, but first has to reassure himself that Rafael is safe and happy. After dinner, Cage clears the table and loads the dishwasher, then moves Ryan's car to the back of the house before catching the bus back into Portland. Ryan puts Rafael through his nighttime routine, and into bed, before returning downstairs to talk to the Washingtons. He tells them of his therapy session with Dr Clarke, and his concern about whether he can be trusted with Rafael. Mrs Washington says she thinks Ryan's a young man who has been through hell, and would go through it again to protect the weak. She was with CPS before starting We Help and remembers Ryan's case, and that the system failed both Ryan and his brother. They would have been safer if the family was poor, but his family was wealthy and influential, knew the right things to say, and had high-priced attorneys to help them. She hadn't previously made the connection between the case and Ryan - she'd never known the children's first names, and Matthews is a common surname. Martha says he could probably find some of the news reports of the day online, but his mind locked it away for a reason, and he needs to be careful about opening that vault. J.J. returns from EWN, and they all go to bed.
On Friday morning, Ryan drops J.J. off at the student union building, then goes to EWN. While alone in the newsroom, he thinks of Teresa then checks the thumb-drive she left him. It's an archive of photos of Rafael growing up. He goes through the remaining paperwork, and on finding an attorney's business card, calls and makes an appointment. He gives the attorney Teresa's name, and tells him he has been approached by ICE. He wants to retain the attorney to find the mother of his child and bring her home. If that's not possible, he'll go where she is.
Professor Ian Black come to the EWN counter at about 11:30am, and is met by Ryan. He mildly threatens Ryan with 'what would staff say if they heard', but Ryan replies that Black can't tell stories without outing himself, and that would damage Black's reputation more than Ryan's. Black says he missed Ryan, but Ryan says he hasn't thought of Black in years, and without the drugs and alcohol he finds the old scene tawdry. Finally Black reveals that he wants Ryan to support him when he publicizes McShane's private life. Ryan says that if Black is going on the record, say in the Faculty Senate, then a reporter would cover that, and then cover the slander suit that the Provost would bring against Black. Black says he thinks 'unnamed sources' would be more appropriate, and Ryan refuses. Black asks in Spanish where Ryan's bride and son are, and says he'll call ICE about Rafael. Black leaves, unaware that Ryan has recorded the conversation on his phone.
12noon: Cage arrives at noon, and Ryan tells him Ian Black had just visited. Cage suggests installing a door at the bottom of the stairs, to prevent visitors entering the newsroom level unless staff are present, and Ryan says he'll add it to EWN's physical plant request. Ryan plays the recorded conversation for Cage, and asks him to make it into an .mp3 file. McShane calls Ryan 15minutes after the file is sent to him. Ryan asks about the night of November 24, 2017 when he was roofied. He remembers McShane was at that party, and says he's always thought it was McShane who got him into a taxi and sent him home. McShane says if he'd known how sick Ryan was, he'd have sent him directly to hospital. Ryan asks if McShane had any idea who drugged him that night. McShane says he'll drop by to discuss the matter in person. Cage goes up to the Crow's Nest to give Ryan and McShane privacy. When McShane arrives shortly after, he and Ryan go into the EIC's office to talk. Ryan asks what really happened that night. McShane says Black brought Ryan to the party that night, and expected Ryan to die of an overdose there. Black was planning to use it to expose McShane and put him out of his job. McShane had blocked Black's promotion to full professor, as a complaint of sex discrimination had been filed against Black which McShane thought had merit, but the complaint was dismissed when the student didn't return in Fall 2017. Ryan tells McShane of his relationship with Teresa, and Rafael. McShane asks Ryan when he will graduate. Ryan says he only had commitments to write an honors thesis, and to the EIC position. McShane tells him to do the paperwork for winter graduation, and finish the thesis, have both on McShane's desk by Monday, and start his applications for grad school as well. He says Ryan needs the flexibility of being ready to graduate if necessary. When McShane leaves, Cage lets Ryan know that he'd been listening to the conversation through the office computer. Ryan decides he's going to find Teresa, marry her, and bring her home. He wonders if he can really write his thesis in a weekend.
Cage phones Ryan from jail at 9pm on Saturday, October 24, 2020, asking him to come and bail him out. He's not sure where he's being held, what he's been charged with, or how much bail has been set. Ryan tells him to pass the phone to someone else nearby. Ryan tells them that Cage is a reporter, and Ryan is his editor. The speaker says he's just another protestor, but Cage hasn't been charged yet; about 20 people were arrested at the ICE protest by federal law enforcement and taken to the local police; Cage's camera was taken and checked at the counter. He says there's a line for the phone, and can he make his own call now? Ryan asks him to tell Cage that he's on his way. When he arrives at the downtown Justice Centre, he tells the uniformed cop at the intake cage that he's there to pick up one of his reporters. Cage is released, and his camera collected, and he leaves with Ryan. Cage has never previously been arrested, Ryan says he was put in the juvie drunk tank a couple of times and learned to have taxi money handy. Ryan takes Cage to the Goose Hollow apartment to unwind and have a shower. Cage says they need to figure out training for reporters, and to make sure that the reporters' go-bags have quarters as Cage had to barter for change for the pay-phone. Ryan tells Cage to send a 5 minute video clip with a lead-in for Bianca, a longer neutral piece about the protest which Sarah can edit and send it over, and a first-person story on getting arrested. Ryan says he'll go to EWN for a while to get the broadcast together.
When Cage and Sarah arrive at the Portsmouth parsonage for lunch on Sunday, October 25, Sarah thinks Ryan looks worn out. Ryan asks Sarah if everyone is still gossiping about J.J. and Carroll, and says that 'the talk' has been had, and he learned more than he shared. J.J. is doing okay, and people can stop worrying.
Ryan arrives at EWN around 4pm on Tuesday, October 27, 2020 after nearly being run off the road on the way down from OHSU. Will, Emily and Cage follow him into his office to ask what happened. Cage says Ryan is looking at this as though Black is a professor and Ryan is a student, but what if he looks at it like Black is a corrupt government official, and Ryan is a reporter? Ryan smiles, and asks Will if he'd like to write a story about a professor plagiarizing a paper from his honors student to form the basis of his latest book. He catches them up on the more convoluted story, but says that this is the equivalent of Capone's sentence for tax evasion. Ryan gives Will a thumb-drive with a copy of the complaint he filed with the Provost that morning, and says that his resignation as EIC is also on the drive, together with a recommendation to the Media Board that Cage and Emily be appointed jointly to finish out Ryan's term of office. Their protests draw in Sarah, Ben and Lam. Ryan says he has to take Teresa to Mexico, and with luck will be back for graduation in spring. Cage agrees he'll work with Emily, but only as interim EIC, then Emily can run for EIC the following year.
The Media Board convenes a special session at 9pm that evening and approves Emily Andersen and Cage Washington as joint acting Editors-in-Chief. They thank Ryan Matthews for his service. Afterwards, Prof Cooper asks Ryan if he knows about the story Bianca is doing. Ryan nods and thanks Cooper for helping her. Cooper says it's his pleasure, as leaving the newsroom can be like going through withdrawal. He offers to put in a word at The Oregonian for Ryan, when he's ready. Ryan thanks him and says he'll keep it in mind. Cooper says he has a date he doesn't want to be late for, and Ryan asks if it's with Karen Young, the attorney. They leave the building together with Cooper walking toward his condo downtown. Ryan crosses the road to his car, and wonders if he should tell someone about the hack he'd inherited from the previous EIC that allows him to park there without tickets. He decided maybe later, when the next EIC takes permanent office. 
Ian Black speaks from the shadows, saying he's being relieved of his duties pending an allegation of plagiarism. Ryan presses the speed-dial for Cage's phone, hoping that Cage will hear what is going on and get Campus Security to the scene. Black says that ICE knows where Teresa is, and will be picking her up in Twin Falls ID the next morning and then they'll go for her son. Ryan says Rafael is his son, which makes him a US citizen. Black says that as Ryan won't be around to support that, Teresa will be assumed to be lying. Ryan says Rafael's guardian is impeccable, but Black says he has friends in high places, and there's a cage waiting. Some private adoption agency will be just waiting to get their hands on a pretty little boy like Rafael. Ryan says Black will be lucky to get an adjunct position teaching Intro US History at a community college, and will need food stamps to make ends meet. Black says he's been promised a permanent consulting job - less prestige, but more money. Ryan says Black is delusional, in just days there will be a new president-elect, and no one will remember that promise. Ryan observes Black has one of the cushiest jobs in the world, he'd got his feeling hurt and spent three years pursuing a vendetta, but the only one he's hurt has been himself. Black raises his 9mm snub-nosed handgun, and two shots ring out. McShane appears as Black falls to the ground, saying Ryan had baited Black into that. Ryan says Black had tried to run him off the road that afternoon, and was getting more and more desperate. Ryan waves to Pete Madison who is sitting on the roof of a nearby apartment building with a long-range rifle. McShane smiles and says now he's got all this paperwork to do unnecessarily. Ryan says that's why McShane gets paid the big bucks, and he hopes Cage gets the cops there quickly. McShane says Cage called him, but he'll call the cops. Cage appears and says he'll take Ryan home. McShane agrees that will make the story simpler, he has a concealed-carry permit on file and he gets death threats. Black fired first, and he's dead so he doesn't get to rebut that. Ryan walks away with Cage, and then suggests they take the Prius. Ryan tells Cage to call Will - lesson one in being an editor and keeping EWN happy is not to let his star reporter be scooped by The Oregonian on a story he's involved in. Cage calls the newsroom and gets Will moving, and tells him to have J.J. get video for the newscast.
====Book 4: Hold Me====
*Tuesday December 1, 2020 - 6pm: Ryan sees the news of the COVID outbreak on the EWN site, and FaceTime's Emily Andersen to ask about the staff. Emily tells him the entire sports staff are out, and Joanna is at OHSU. He says he wishes he was there to help, but even if he wanted to he couldn't. Mexico has all but stopped flights from the US, so very few flights back out. Emily suggests he could be EIC remotely, but Ryan says that wouldn't work, and they can't change back now. He can't think of two better people to get EWN through the outbreak than Cage and her, but he will always be available to listen.
----In late October 2020, Ryan resigns and recommends to the Media Board that Emily Andersen and Cage Washington be appointed to finish out his term. 
== Physical Appearance ==
In Book 1: Stories We Tell, Ryan is 24 years old. He is about 6-foot-1 tall, classically proportioned with broad shoulders, bulging biceps, and six-pack abs. He has dark brown hair, perfect features, amazing blue eyes, a soft brown beard and a practiced smile with one dimple. Emily Andersen considers him one of the most beautiful men she's ever seen. 
Ryan is fit and strong, but he's not a fighter. He plays soccer, so is fast-moving and agile. 
On his right shoulder, Ryan has an amazing tattoo of a dragon. The dragon starts along his shoulder blade and peers over his shoulder, presiding over a Chinese garden that covers his bicep and right pectoral and extends below his elbow almost to his wrist. The sleeve is like a chinoiserie fabric, with a Chinese bridge, a plum tree in bloom, and a path. He got the dragon tattoo at the age of 16, to hide some older scars that people had told him were from a car accident.
He has white whip scars on his back, below the dragon tattoo.
Ryan is generally fairly casually dressed, but can also dress formally if needed. He mainly wears clothing in combinations of black, white and grey.
Ben and Bianca both think Ryan would be a sensation on screen, but he will rarely even do a voice-over.
== Personality ==
=== Book 1: Stories We Tell ===
Ryan is an extreme extrovert, and exhibitionist. His charm is hard to resist, and he oozes sex. He describes his sexuality as 'omnisexual' - willing to eat anything. Ryan never had to worry about finding sex, he just said "Yes" a lot. 
When bored, he will stir up trouble for others, with the brunt being borne by university administration. Emily Andersen has found that mentioning Ryan's name in the Faculty Senate could produce flinches from some of the faculty - especially the pompous men. They call Ryan a 'devious bastard', or 'manipulative bastard', but EWN is proud of him. 
During COVID lock-downs, Ryan misses human contact with people. He doesn't find online classes aren't as satisfying as going to class in person, or arguing with a professor. 
One of EWN's common observations is that Ryan sees people very clearly. Everyone but himself. 
Ryan says he sees all the possible problems and alternatives with decisions. Until a decision is final he has time to dither, but he's full steam ahead once committed. 
Bianca says, "Don't play poker with Ryan. He will always match and raise. And it's hard to beat someone who does that." 
Ryan is a word person, he thinks in words not images. 
He likes 'Hawaiian' pizzas, with pineapple. 
=== Book 2: Choose ===
Sarah King appreciates Ryan's thoughtfulness at the Loft party, saving her a parking spot near the entrance, paying her cover charge, and reserving her a comfortable chair. Even though he knows she's a lesbian, he can't resist flirting with her - 'the safest flirt there is' according to his lesbian friends.
=== Book 3: Don't Go ===
Just before they arrive at the Portsmouth parsonage for dinner on Tuesday, October 20, 2020 Ryan asks Emily if she's considered that he uses sex as an alternative to addictive drugs.
Ryan has never been interested in being in front of a camera. He writes stories so that he can go and ask more questions. He wants to understand people, what makes them tick, why they do what they do.
Teresa believes that Ryan is a protector, and has seen it at EWN and with his friends. He takes care of people, and will take care of Rafael. She's not sure if he's capable of love, though she hopes.
== Relationships ==
=== Teresa Valdez and children ===
In 2016/17, Ryan had a non-exclusive (on his part) relationship with Teresa Valdez. He started learning Spanish while they were together. He went home with her for Christmas in 2016. Her family primarily spoke Spanish at home, and he wanted them to like him. Until October 20, 2020, he is unaware that Teresa became pregnant and gave birth to their son, Rafael Matthews Valdez in 2017. 
==== Book 3: Don't Go ====
When she is threatened with arrest by ICE and deportation to Mexico, Teresa arrives at the EWN newsroom with Rafael, and leaves him with Ryan for safety.
Cage, Sarah, Emily, Ryan and Rafael join Clyde and Martha Washington for dinner at the Portsmouth parsonage that evening. Mrs Washington asks what Ryan's plans are for Rafael. Ryan says he's still shell-shocked, but the Loft is no place for a child, and he knows nothing about caring for Rafael. Mrs Washington says he'll learn, like everyone does, and offers to have both Rafael and him stay with them at the parsonage. An alternative would be to ask Gregory and Bianica to take in Rafael, but that wouldn't give Ryan a chance to bond with Rafael and might be traumatic for him. Ryan suggests a combination - they both stay, but he pays Bianica to babysit while Ryan is at EWN. Mrs Washington approves. Ryan tells Rafael to stay with Mrs Washington, and passes him to her. They talk about Rafael's language skills, and about Teresa. Emily is anxious to return to EWN, so Mrs Washington shows Ryan to a bedroom with twin beds, and gives him a key.
After leaving EWN around 10pm that night, Ryan goes to the Loft to pack, then to Target to get the stuff on the list Mrs Washington had texted to him. When he arrives at the Washington home around midnight, Rev Washington is still awake, but Martha has gone to bed. Rev Washington is due to meet with Dr Clarke and J.J. at 10am the next day. He asks if Ryan wants to be there. Ryan asks about Rafael, and Rev Washington says that Martha is willing to watch him. Bianica is also willing to help Ryan with child care. Ryan tells him about the car watching EWN, and Rev Washington says he'll warn his wife, and they'll keep the doors locked. Rev Washington tells Ryan to get some sleep, breakfast will be at 7am and Rafael may be awake even earlier.
When Ryan wakes at 6am the next morning, Rafael has crawled into bed with him. Rev Washington knocks on the bedroom door, and Ryan wakes Rafael. Rev Washington takes Rafael to get cleaned up for breakfast, so Ryan can shower etc. Ryan goes through his morning routine, then goes down to the kitchen where Mrs Washington is cooking breakfast. Rev Washington and Rafael are already sitting at the table. Bianica is expected to arrive with John Lewis, so Ryan can see how the two boys get along. Rev Washington leaves to go to OHSU, and Ryan asks him to tell Dr Clarke that he will be making an appointment. Ryan helps Rafael clean up after breakfast, and Martha says that it's good that the two of them are starting to bond. Ryan thinks Teresa was preparing Rafael. as Rafael called him Papa that morning. Martha says Ryan will need to commit to Rafael, as it's not fair to create a bond and then abandon it if it becomes inconvenient. Ryan says he won't abandon his son. Bianica and John Lewis arrive at the Portsmouth parsonage to meet Ryan and Rafael. Ryan introduces them to Rafael. and Mrs Washington takes the two boys out into the back yard to play. Bianica asks after Teresa, and Ryan fills her in. She says it will be good for John Lewis to have someone to play with, so they'll work out a schedule. Gregory wants to talk to him about Ryan being paid commission on the alumni advertising that he lined up the previous summer. Ryan agrees and says he can then use that to pay Bianica for child care, and the Washingtons for rent. Ryan and Bianica discuss a schedule until Mrs Washington brings the boys back inside, both giggling. Ryan leaves for EWN and classes while Rafael stays with Mrs Washington and John Lewis.
While in his office at EWN on Thursday morning, Ryan reads Teresa's journal. Emily arrived at 11:30am with nachos, and Ryan tells her he has just read Teresa's journal and would like her to read it too. Ryan says he would have married Teresa, but Emily reminds him that Teresa left well before Ryan started rehab in February 2018, and he would have been a poor husband back then. Emily tells Ryan of researching the naturalization process the previous day, and that it can be expensive, time-consuming, and not guaranteed. Teresa would have to leave the US and apply from Mexico - but even establishing documentation for Mexican citizenship may be difficult.
Ryan spends Saturday playing in the backyard with Rafael, with a nap after lunch, and reading him a book. Rafael falls asleep after supper, and Ryan carries him up and puts him to bed. J.J. offers to keep an eye on Rafael while Ryan goes to therapy at OHSU.
After lunch on Sunday, Rev Washington tells Ryan that a neighbor had called to let them know they were under surveillance. There is a black car parked down the street, similar to the one that had been seen near EWN. Rev Washington recommends Ryan not take Rafael off the property. Corey installed surveillance cameras at the parsonage following some vandalism at the church, and ICE agents are likely to be white and won't blend into the neighborhood. Ryan is concerned he is putting the Washingtons in jeopardy, but Rev Washington says that his family goes back to the 1700s in the USA - only the indigenous people have deeper ties than Black people - so ICE doesn't worry him. His sons are at risk every day that they go into a white neighborhood - and in Portland, all neighborhoods are white - but he is not going to back down and let them take a 3-year-old in his care. Ryan says his concern is that Rev Washington will be hurt trying to protect Rafael, and he's important to the Black community, they can't afford to lose him. Rev Washington says he's not going anywhere.
On Monday afternoon, Ryan goes to meet Vic Ruiz at Immigration Law Ltd. Vic asks if Rafael is safe, and Ryan says Rafael is his son, so a US citizen, why are ICE expending this much energy and money on him? They talk about the coming presidential election and its effect on immigration, but Ruiz says there's something weird about the Valdez case. Ryan tells Vic what he knows about Ian Black, and his grievance against Teresa and Ryan. Vic has his uncle join them and summarizes Ryan's information about Black. Mr Ruiz tells Ryan there have been rumors of investigators funded by various federal agencies who are in Mexico doing 'genealogical work'. One of their connections in Mexico had mentioned a Professor Black. Ryan asks for permission to share the information with the PSU Provost, as he's concerned Black is pushing ICE to pursue Teresa aggressively. Ryan calls McShane, who agrees to come to talk to the attorneys in person. While waiting for McShane, Ryan calls Joel Parkinson to check how much the Matthews Trust has available in liquid funds. Mr Ruiz tells Ryan they have a joint agreement with a firm in San Francisco, and they can have all the paperwork ready when he and Teresa arrive there. They will need to spend a week in San Francisco, and then six months or so in Mexico to establish residency while Teresa's citizenship application is processed as Ryan's wife.
On the way from Vic's office to the conference room at 3pm, Vic says that Ryan is now being billed for everything at their top rates, now that they know he's not a broke college student. Ryan says he'd prefer the Provost not to know about his family connections. McShane is already waiting in the room when they arrive, and Ryan briefs him on what he's learned. McShane produces the toxicology lab reports from Dr Clarke in 2017, and they conclude that while someone did indeed attempt to kill Ryan, his testimony would not hold up in court. Ryan's migraine increases, and he takes medication. Emily calls, saying she'd had a weird call from Professor Ian Black, and thought Ryan should know. Ryan places the call on speaker for his attorneys and McShane to listen in. Emily says Black wanted to know if Ryan had assigned the 'feature piece' he'd discussed with Ryan. Emily told him Ryan had not talked to her about a feature, but she had found a press release about Black's new book, and will assign a reporter to interview him about it. She said Black got hostile, saying Ryan should know better than to play games with him. Ryan asks Emily for the title of the book, and she says 'Fertility Symbols in Pre-Colonial Mexico'. Ryan asks her to send someone to University Relations for a review copy, and then to go to Ryan's computer, search for 'fertility', and email him the file as an attachment. Emily says she'll send J.J. to get the book, then he can take it home to Ryan that night. Ryan says if Black calls again, to refer Black to him. Emily says Bianca has turned in her first immigration piece with her friend who is being deported to China, and is calling the series 'Faces of Immigration'. She wants approval to interview Miguel. Ryan tells her to go ahead. McShane asks if Black's book plagiarizes an undergraduate thesis. Ryan prints the email attachment, and gives it to McShane. When Ryan's migraine hits again. McShane asks for permission to touch him, then performs acupressure at the base of Ryan's skull. It provides such immediate pain relief, it's almost orgasmic. McShane says that his wife gets migraines, refers Ryan to her acupuncturist, and comments that Ryan has been under a lot of stress. Vic Ruiz asks if Black's book is similar to Ryan's paper, and McShane agrees it is, and tells Ryan to make a formal complaint. Ryan tells his attorneys to get things started, he wants to go after Teresa as soon as they think he can, and they say it will take a couple of days to set things up. The receptionist comes in and tells them that ICE agents have arrived, asking to speak to the senior partner about a possible breach of ethics. Mr Ruiz tells her to take the agents into his office, and Vic to escort McShane and Ryan out the back way. Vic leads them down to the end of a back alley, and Ryan watches McShane leave and is concerned about the attraction he feels, given his commitment to Teresa. Vic tells Ryan he'll call when they're ready to set up the rendezvous.
After missing a couple of calls from Vic Ruiz earlier on Tuesday, Ryan calls him back around 3pm to hear there are concerns about ICE sniffing around where Teresa is in Idaho. Vic asks if Ryan can leave the following morning to get her. He'll call Ryan back with further information after talking to the senior partner and their San Francisco liaison. As Ryan starts driving down the hill, a large V8 car races down behind him trying to run him off the road. Having grown up in the area, Ryan is familiar with the streets and turns suddenly into a cul-de-sac evading the other car. He calls one of his loft-mates, and then slowly drives to EWN.
Ryan wakes early the next morning with Rafael cuddled beside him. He dresses quickly then goes down to find his backpack and laptop to check the EWN story from the night before. Cage hands him coffee and says that Emily has learned from watching Ryan over the years, so the story doesn't mention ICE or Ryan, just a nutcase of a professor with a grudge against the Provost. Cage stayed in Portsmouth overnight to help Ryan. Ryan assures him that he'll be back, but Cage says it won't be the same. Ryan says different isn't always bad, and asks if Cage is kicking Sarah out soon? Cage says he and Emily had a fight, the day before J.J.'s suicide attempt. Ryan asks what it was about, as Emily doesn't seem angry. Cage says he kissed her, and so did Sarah. Ryan hugs Cage, thinking he could get good at them. Cage cooks breakfast as his parents come into the kitchen followed by J.J. and Rafael. Ryan hugs Rafael and pats J.J. on the shoulder. J.J. whispers to him he got the story from Carroll and Turk: Sarah kissed Emily; Cage saw, and then kissed her too, and said to let him know when she decided which kind she liked better; and then it's Sarah who ends up living with him. Cage tells J.J. that if he's gossiping about him, J.J. will be doing stupid little features for Emily forever. Everyone pitches in to help Ryan and Rafael get on the road by 10am.
Vic Ruiz calls Ryan about noon as he passes through Troutdale to say that the migrant family that Teresa was with had pulled into Twin Falls ID that morning, and ICE was waiting for them. They, and all the other farm employees there, have been detained. Vic hasn't heard from Teresa, and it's possible she went to Twin Falls with them. Ryan says he's going to continue on to Nampa ID where they had planned to meet. Vic says she was supposed to meet Ryan at a Mexican taqueria in Nampa at 2pm and wait there until 5pm. If Ryan hadn't yet arrived, she was to meet him at Denny's at 7pm. Ryan says he'll be there before 5pm, and if she's not there he'll go on to Twin Falls. He directs Vic to get the best attorney possible for the migrant family in Twin Falls, and Vic says it's already been done. Ryan asks if Vic has seen the story on the EWN site, and Vic calls it up to read it. Ryan says the Provost killed Black, just as the story says, but that Black's gun was pointed at Ryan not McShane. So Ryan's a little shaky, and it would be really good to find Teresa. Rafael becomes anxious and asks where his Mama is. Vic tells him to call when he gets to Nampa, and Ryan reassures Rafael they are going to get his Mama.
Ryan and Rafael arrive at the Nampa taqueria at 4pm (OR), and Teresa is overjoyed to see them. They eat lunch, and Rafael clings to Teresa. Ryan says there is so much to tell her, and asks her to marry him. Teresa bluntly tells him that if they marry, there can be no other women, and Ryan agrees. He tells her of his therapy, how he wants what the Washingtons have, and that Dr Clarke had helped him understand that it's not that desire ends, but that you make a commitment not to act on that desire so as not to harm your relationship. Teresa nods and says for example Cage is a fine-looking man, but she wouldn't do anything about that because of what she wants for them. Ryan tells her what J.J. passed on about Cage, Emily and Sarah, and she laughs and says they need to get home to watch that. They talk about honeymooning in Mexico while Vic gets the immigration paperwork sorted out, and that they can be married in San Francisco. She tells him she wants to finish her degree, and how she has learned what she wants to do in the future with bilingual education. Ryan tells her McShane thinks he has a future in academia, and Teresa agrees. She asks where he wants to get his doctorate? Ryan laughs and says those are long term plans, for now he wants to get to Boise to fly to San Francisco. Teresa worries about paying for everything, and Ryan says it's a long story. He kisses her and realizes that home isn't a place, it's the people he loves.
Ryan's Prius is small, and Rafael's things take up most of the space, but fortunately Teresa doesn't have much stuff. Vic Ruiz calls about 6pm (OR) to say there is a change of plans, as even for an internal flight, all parties would need to show identification and Teresa is still on ICE's watch list. They will have to drive to San Francisco, instead of flying. Vic discusses the route with them, and they head for Burns OR.
Ryan finds a vacancy at Day's Inn in Burns, and books a room with a cot for a 3-year-old. He pays cash when they arrive at 9pm, and gets the family safely into their room. Teresa is tense, and tells Ryan she's worried that he is just trying to do the right thing, and will regret it later. She wants them to marry because they love each other, not because he feels obligated. Ryan says he thinks she's rescuing him too, because he's a mess. Teresa also says she's worried she won't please him, as she's not as sexually experienced as his other partners have been. Ryan says it's not about her pleasing him, it's about their pleasure together. He loves the way she touches him, and the way she feels and responds when he touches her. He kisses her, and lets her explore and know that she's the one in control. They make love quietly, without waking Rafael.
The next morning Ryan repacks the Prius, while Teresa helps Rafael get ready to leave. They check out, and as they leave Ryan notices the clerk on the phone but looking at them. They decide to get on the road immediately, and have breakfast in Bend OR.
They get breakfast at a drive-thru Starbucks in Bend at 9am, and pull into a small park to drink their coffee. Ryan calls Vic Ruiz and tells him about the motel clerk. Vic says he'll investigate and call them back. Ryan checks different routes on Google maps, and as they drive on, realizes how privileged he's been as a white man to have always been safe when he traveled. He tells Teresa, and she agrees that's what white male privilege is - the 'not having to think about it', and assuming everything will be fine. They spend an hour talking about privilege, and what she'd learned traveling while with the migrant family. They take a short break so Rafael can play in a patch of snow, then continue on. Ryan says so much has happened, but he feels he needs to tell Teresa about his grandparents immediately. He tells her about his adoption, his rebellious teens, and how they left him in Portland with a huge trust fund provided he attend a four-year college. He hadn't wanted the trust fund to make a difference, so he used it only for things covered by normal financial aid, and lived off what he made at EWN until recently, when he realized that he would need the money to bring them together as a family. So they have many things to worry about, but money isn't one of them. He doesn't think his other friends are aware, but notes that Emily is very observant.
Noon: Vic Ruiz calls around noon when they are about an hour out of Eugene OR, to say that ICE has a BOLO for their license plates, in connection with the death of Ian Black, an ICE consultant. Teresa had not known Black was dead, and asks why ICE would be looking for Ryan. He tells her Black was threatening him with a gun, fired and missed, and so McShane shot and killed Black. McShane has a concealed-carry permit, and sent Ryan off with Cage. Black had tried to kill Ryan earlier on Tuesday by running him off the road, so Ryan didn't ask and got out of there before the cops showed up. Black had said he could make a call to ICE and it would go badly for Teresa, Rafael and himself, but perhaps he'd already made that call. Ryan tells Vic that if ICE are looking for their car, then he needs a new car. Vic says he knows an attorney near Eugene and will call back. Ryan says they'll stop at a Starbucks, and wait to hear back from him. Teresa asks what else Ryan hasn't told her, and he admits there's lots, but he's trying to tell her what she needs to know first. Teresa says that's okay as long as he's not trying to protect her. Ryan says he only hopes he's as strong as she is, he's read her journal and trusts her to stand at his side, no matter what comes. When they reach the next Starbucks, Ryan pulls over. Teresa takes her satchel and adds Rafael's essentials, telling Ryan never to go anywhere without his papers and what he must have. Ryan hands over Rafael's ID and legal papers, and pulls cash out of a locked box under his seat refilling his wallet, but giving most to Teresa in case they are separated. They use the Starbucks bathrooms then get food and coffee. As they exit Starbucks, they see a police car parked next to the Prius, with an officer looking it over. They cross the highway to a park, Ryan gets a text from Vic that his friend Jonathan Tremont will call, and when he does, Ryan tells him they have a problem. Tremont says he has rented a car in his own name, and will bring it to them. Soon after, he arrives and tells them that the rental company knows it's hired for a client stranded with car trouble, and Ryan is listed as a secondary driver. He has arranged for a friend to pick him up after they've left. They discuss their route to San Francisco, and Tremont recommends they spend the night in Ashland OR, and offers to call ahead and make a reservation for them there.
5pm?: When they arrive in Ashland around 5pm, they check into their motel then go out for take-out and bring it back to their room. After Rafael is asleep, Teresa asks if Ryan is sure about them, as she won't marry a man who won't be faithful. She asks what has changed from last time they were together. Ryan tells her he almost died, and Cage took him to OHSU. The psychiatrist there told him he was an alcoholic and if he didn't stop he'd be dead in a year. So getting clean was the first thing, and once clean, the party scene didn't appeal as much. He'd recently started seeing Dr Clarke again, as he wanted to be Rafael's father, and the man Teresa would want. And the first thing Dr Clarke asked was his earliest memories, and he told her 10, when he was adopted. Ryan takes off his shirt, and has Teresa touch the scars on his belly that he'd once told her were from a car accident, and tells her they're cigarette burns, and the ones on his shoulder are from a knife. There are more, because sometime in the 10 years he doesn't remember, he was abused. Teresa is horrified and crying and pulls his head down to her shoulder. Ryan goes on and tells her that his adoptive parents never told him they are his real grandparents, and his parents served time for the death of his younger brother, and his own near-death abuse. And that there is still a lot he doesn't know, but when they get the chance he wants to go back and work with Dr Clarke for more therapy. He tells Teresa he is so broken, but will never betray his vows to her. Will she marry him, broken pieces and all? Teresa tells him he is hers, broken pieces and all, and if he feels needy, he is to come to her and she will help him heal those broken places, as she loves him. And for the first time, Ryan knows he's not alone.
On November 5-6, 2020, postcards showing Ryan, Teresa and Rafael, postmarked from Mexico are received by Cage and Emily at EWN, Rev. Clyde and Martha Washington, Dr Clarke at OHSU, and Andrew McShane at PSU. 
==== Book 4: Hold Me ====
*Tuesday December 1, 2020 - 6pm: During Ryan's FaceTime call with Emily Andersen, she asks him how's married life, and he says it's amazing.
--- 
Teresa and Rafael return to Portland on Dec 24, 2020. Initially the three of them stay with Emily and Cage in the Goose Hollow apartment, but on January 10, they go to inspect one of the houses owned by the Matthews Trust Fund, as a potential home. It is a craftsman bungalow within walking distance of Reed College. It has three bedrooms - two upstairs and one down -, and two baths - one upstairs, one down. The downstairs bedroom will be used as a shared study. The interior has dark woodwork, but each room is painted a different color - the kitchen is yellow, the living room is a periwinkle blue. Ryan considers repainting, but Teresa enjoys the bright colors which remind her of Mexico. The backyard is completely fenced, with a covered patio off the back door. Flower borders surround a grassy lawn. Ryan has the property find alternative accommodation for the current tenants. 
When Teresa and Ryan encounter Bill Matthews Jr at the Portland Heights house in mid-January 2021, he introduces her only as 'Teresa', and says he has brought her to see the view from the balcony. He doesn't want any of his birth family to know anything about his life, his friends, and especially not Teresa or Rafael. The Matthews are scary, evil people, and he has never met Bill Jr before that he can recall. He doesn't know if Bill Jr was involved in the abused that killed his baby brother, doesn't know if he's as evil as Bill Sr. 
=== BDSM ===
Ryan can be either submissive or dominant, for men or for women, and although he occasionally craves submission he withdrew from the BSDM lifestyle at the same time as he became abstinent from drugs and alcohol. Consent is important to him. 
In Book 1: Stories We Tell, when Kevin Tighe asks Ryan if he can help Claire, Ryan doesn't think he had ever been hardcore enough to administer the kind of pain she needs. He is a masochist rather than a sadist. 
In the short story When Ryan Met Ruby, Ruby introduces herself to Ryan on 18th birthday in 2014, on the dance floor at Embers nightclub. Ryan has developed a reputation as a chameleon - he can dom or sub. Men or women. If he chooses, he can play your game however you like it. Few can make him submit, mostly it's his choice to do so. Ruby takes him to a private party, and they play together with Ruby as dominatrix and Ryan as submissive. Master A observes, standing as protector. 
On November 24, 2017 Ian Black approaches Ryan at Embers nightclub, and invites Ryan to join him at a large party at a well-known BDSM club. Although Ryan is already dancing with Ruby, and doesn't like Black anyway, he is 'wasted enough' to go. Ruby shows up there as well, wanting to be dominant to Ryan's submission, and that suits Ryan's mood. Black unsuccessfully tries to join them, but can't submit to Ruby. Ian Black brings Ryan a drink spiked with a mix of drugs including Rohypnol, and from that point Ryan's memories fracture with a mixture of sex, drugs and alcohol. Master A places him in a taxi and sends him home. 
The McShane's have original BDSM sketches left to Ryan - with him as the star - by the Maestro, kept in a large artist's portfolio in their safe. They also have a 'thumb-drive' (USB flash drive). Andrew McShane advises Ryan to take everything to Rita Morales and let her unravel the senior Matthews' and the Maestro's will. She can develop a comprehensive report, with recommendations on how Ryan should proceed. 
=== Friends ===
==== Cage Washington ====
===== Book 1: Stories We Tell =====
Ryan's best friend is Cage Washington, who started as freshmen (first year of college) when Ryan was a sophomore (second year of college). 
When Ryan gets home on November 24, 2017 after having his drink spiked by Ian Black, he realizes he's in trouble. He calls Cage Washington, who takes him to OHSU to get his stomach pumped. Ryan credits Cage with saving his life that night. 
Other than the one Christmas break he spent with the Valdez family, his holidays have all been spent at the Washingtons. 
==== Emily Andersen ====
===== Book 1: Stories We Tell =====
Emily also started as freshmen when Ryan was a sophomore. Ryan made a pass at Emily in their first year at EWN, but she had turned him down, saying "I don't want to be your flavor of the week, I'd rather be best friends for life."
==== Dr Erica Clarke ====
===== Book 1: Stories We Tell =====
On November 24, 2017, Cage took Ryan to OSHU and got his stomach pumped. Over the next few months, Dr Erica Clarke convinced Ryan to stop drinking. On February 14, 2018 Ryan voluntarily gave up alcohol and drugs, and went through detoxification, and has since abstained other than non-alcoholic beer. He feels he owes a debt to Dr Clarke.
While talking to Joel Parkinson about the Matthews Family Trust on Tuesday June 2, 2020, Ryan asks if he knows anything about Ryan's adoption, or about his birth family. He wonders if he had a younger brother, and how he can find out. Joel acknowledges he knows some things, but worries for Ryan's mental health. He'd always wondered how much Ryan remembered, and what would happen if he started to remember more. He gives Ryan the contact details for Dr Erica Clarke, a psychiatrist at OHSU, and asks him not to discuss this with his parents - it's way outside the boundaries for a financial advisor. Ryan wonders why Dr Clarke had never let on that she knew him, but trusts that there is an explanation.
===== Book 3: Don't Go =====
On Thursday, October 22, 2020 Ryan starts therapy with Dr Clarke.
==== Joanna Montgomery ====
===== Book 1: Stories We Tell =====
Ryan has sex with Joanna Montgomery after the popup party in the Crow's Nest on Friday May 22, 2020, at her instigation. This was not their first time together. He likes her, and sex with her is an athletic romp without pressure.
On Wednesday June 3, Ryan and Joanna go for a run up from EWN into the West Hills and back.
== Possessions ==
=== Residences ===
==== The Loft ====
===== Book 1: Stories We Tell =====
Ryan has been living at the Loft, in NW Portland since about 2016. He has a corner bedroom on the second floor with a shared bath down the hall.
==== Portsmouth Parsonage ====
When Rafael comes into Ryan's life, Rev Washington invites them to stay at the Portsmouth parsonage, as the Loft is not a suitable place for a child.
==== Portland Heights house ====
The house in Portland Heights is approached from PSU by driving up SW Montgomery St, then turning left into Vista Ave and continuing uphill. The house is on the downhill (eastern) side of the road, with views toward downtown Portland and Mt Hood. Leaving the house, it is a right turn from the driveway onto Vista Ave. The two-lane road from the house to the Vista Ave Viaduct is continuously downhill. 
The house is 5000 - 6000 square feet, and clings to the hillside, stepping down four floors. It is in a Northwest wooden style that would not look out of place in Japan. It has a dark roof with a wide overhang, wooden walls framing large glass windows on the side overlooking the city, and slate tiles at the entrance. Vista Ave runs along the top boundary, with a black iron-rod electric gate, with keypad, across the driveway. There is another keypad at the house entrance. 
The top floor has an entrance space, a kitchen and dining room. Outside the dining room is a deck with glorious views of the city. An elevator goes down to the next floor. 
The second floor is the largest. It has a large living room and another wood deck. To the left is Ryan's suite of rooms - a bed, bath and sitting room. He as not lived there since he was 18. To the right is his grandfather's den and his grandmother's study. 
The third floor was his grandparent's bedroom, with a luxurious master bath and sitting room. At the foot of their bed is an old trunk, containing photo albums, dating back to before Ryan was born. The albums prove his grandparents knew he and his younger brother were being battered, and may even have been participating in the abuse. 
A closet door in the third floor bedroom leads to stairs down to his grandparents' photo studio. The room stretches along the base of the entire house. Patio doors lead to a small enclosed courtyard. 
=== Vehicles ===
==== Book 1: Stories We Tell ====
Ryan drives a older-model blue Prius. This car has to be abandoned it in Eugene OR, and is later sold there.
=== Matthews Trust Fund ===
==== Book 1: Stories We Tell ====
Ryan's adoptive family was rich. Really rich. They left Ryan behind in Portland just before he turned 18, to go on a year-long cruise and then retire to San Diego, creating a trust fund that would provide him with all the money he could want. However Ryan doesn't want to be seen as a 'rich kid', so he uses the trust only to pay for his tuition and fees, and lives off his EWN wages like everyone else. He tosses the financial statements into a lockbox in the Loft basement that he uses for important papers.
On Tuesday June 2, 2020 Ryan calls Joel Parkinson and asks if he can make a donation to PSU. Joel says there is no restrictions on what he can spend of the trust income. Ryan's grandfather Bill Matthews had donated a lot to PSU in the past, and both he and Janet were Alumni. Ryan knew Bill had been on the Alumni Board. Joel tells Ryan he has a lot of money just piling up, and he should let Joel reinvest it for him - perhaps in a separate account. He tells Joel of EWN's desire to go to a full year broadcast, and that Alumni Affairs don't advertise with EWN. He asks if the Trust can anonymously offer Alumni Affairs $30k of matching funds for EWN to run an image campaign directed at current students. Joel is agreeable, and assures Ryan that he doesn't need permission, and that there are sufficient funds available. Since turning 21, Ryan has more latitude over how the fund is managed. Joel offers to take a personal role in the proposal saying he considers it a creative idea, and looks forward to seeing Ryan develop other ideas.
--
His adoptive father Bill Matthews was a named partner of the legal firm Chandler, Matthews and Brown. When Ryan finishes high school, he enrolls at Portland Community College. , as long as he attended a 4-year-college. However, until May 2020, Ryan had used the trust only to pay for his tuition and fees - like a scholarship - and lived off his EWN wages, just like the others did. Most of the time he tries not to think about the money. He also has deeds to most of the Matthews property in Portland, including a house in Portland Heights. All of the properties are in a management company.
The trust issues a quarterly report to both Ryan and his grandparents. It has a stipulation that requires Ryan to add any dependents to the trust, and Matthews senior would become their guardians should anything happen to him. If they are deceased, the guardian becomes an uncle of Ryan's. Madeline Peters (nee Matthews), Ryan's mother, is listed as a co-creator of the trust. 
In late 2020, Ryan consults informally with Vic Ruiz, and then formally with Rita Morales about the trust fund. He wants to limit any control his grandparents and mother have over his life. Rita Morales proposes that Madeline be removed from access to trust information, and that detailed financial reporting to Matthews senior be stopped, as Ryan is now legally an adult and should be allowed privacy. She also suggest an amendment that changes the language about children to say only that they must be listed with the trust in order to inherit, and that may be done at any time before their majority. In January 2021, Rita advises that the Trust officer has dropped Madeline from the distribution list, and will limit access to detailed trust information to only Ryan. The registration of dependent children is awaiting clarification. Rita advises Ryan to withdraw the maximum allowed from the trust, get a home, and be prepared to weather a financial storm. As Rev. Washington has died, Rita suggests Ryan appoint the McShanes as guardians for Rafael in case of his and Teresa's death. Rita is to provide a progress report on January 29, 2021. 
The manager of the Matthews Trust Fund is Joel Parkinson, and his management firm is highly respected. 
 
 
 
 
Category:Character
Category:EWN
Category:Loft