Transcript:Horrid Henry's Holiday

Mum, Dad and Perfect Peter: [singing in the car] Frere Jacques, Frere Jacques. Dormez-vous? Dormez-vous? Sonnez les matines! Sonnez les matines! Ding, dang, dong. Ding, dang, dong.
Horrid Henry: [singing] Are we there yet?
Mum: Henry!
Perfect Peter: [reading a book] I'm learning French. Mamon! [laughs]
Horrid Henry: What's French for 'worm'? [spots Camp Le Fun] Wait, stop! There it is! Camp Le Fun!
Perfect Peter: How do you know? 
Horrid Henry: Duh, Ralph went last year. [flashback to three swimming pools with three slides] It's got three pools [flashback to Ralph and other people watching TV as Ralph changes the channels] and one hundred and twenty-four TV channels. [Flashback ends. Henry points at Camp Le Fun] Turn here, Dad. 
[Dad drives the opposite way from where Camp Le Fun is] 
Horrid Henry: You're going the wrong way! Stop! 
Dad: We're not staying there, Henry. We're having a real camping holiday; close to the joys of nature! 
Horrid Henry: Nature? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! 
[Title card shows] 
[Dad sets up the tent when they arrive and Henry complains he hates it] 
Horrid Henry: This is a dump! 
Mum: Nonsense. This is perfect! 
Horrid Henry: Where's the TV? 
Mum: No TV here, thank goodness. 
Horrid Henry: Where's the pool? 
Dad: No pool. We'll swim in the lake. 
Horrid Henry: Where are the toilets? 
Dad: No toilets.
Henry, Peter & Mum together: Huh? 
Dad: Only joking: it's over there. 
[Dad showed them where the toilet is and it looks really disgusting and Henry and Peter look disgusted] 
Perfect Peter: That's the toilet?
Dad: This is real camping!
Perfect Peter: Oh, yes, Dad. Bonjour trees, bonjour birds, bonjour... Oh. 
[The French Camper says bonjour to Peter and starts to hang out his washing] 
French Camper: Bonjour. 
Perfect Peter: Oh, uh, bonjour Monsieur! [he mispronounces Monsieur as 'Mon-Sewer']
French Camper: [frowns at Peter] Ah, Anglais.
Perfect Peter: Um, I think that means 'welcome'. 
Dad: Hand me that pole, please, Henry. 
[Henry takes one of the poles from the camper's washing line and gets angry and puts his washing back in the basket] 
Horrid Henry: Why can't we stay at Camp Le Fun? 
Dad: Comfy beds and hot showers? That's not real camping! 
Perfect Peter: Bonjour, camping! 
Mum: We're staying here, Henry. So you might as well stop making a fuss and enjoy yourself. 
Horrid Henry: [groans] Can it get any worse? 
[Dad, Henry and Peter went for a swim in the lake and Henry was frightened] 
Dad: Last one in is a cowardy custard! 
[Dad dives into the lake, but finds it very cold]
Dad: Oh, oh, oh. Come on, you two. It's lovely!
[Peter walks into the lake and starts swimming and Dad starts swimming too] 
Perfect Peter: Ooh.
[Peter starts to shiver due to being really cold] 
Dad: Much better than a swimming pool, eh Peter? 
Perfect Peter: Much b...better. C-Come on, Henry! 
Horrid Henry: No way! It's filthy! And the snakes will get me! 
Perfect Peter: Snakes?! 
[Dad walks out of the lake to force Henry to get in there] 
Dad: Don't be such a baby! You're coming in! 
Horrid Henry: No! 
Dad: Come on, a bit of mud never hurt anyone! [pulls Henry who is grabbing tightly around a tree] D'ooh! 
Horrid Henry: Aah! 
[Peter laughs at Henry for landing on his head] 
Horrid Henry: I...I hate nature! 
[It was dark and Peter turned on his torch because of him getting scared something which woke up Henry] 
Perfect Peter: [gasps] What was that? 
Horrid Henry: I don't know! Probably a werewolf. 
Perfect Peter: No, it's not! You're just trying to scare me. 
[Henry pretends to be a werewolf] 
Perfect Peter: T...That was you, Henry. 
Horrid Henry: No, it wasn't! 
[The noise happens again and this time it wasn't Henry] 
Horrid Henry: See, it wasn't me! 
[Peter looks outside] 
Perfect Peter: I think it was an owl. 
Horrid Henry: Or a werewolf pretending to be an owl. Werewolfs are very clever. Well, goodnight, then! 
Perfect Peter: Ooh, Henry! I need the toilet. 
Horrid Henry: Well, go then. 
Perfect Peter: It's dark out there. What if I meet... you know, [whispers] the werewolf. 
[Henry takes Peter to the toilet and Peter uses his torch to check for the werewolf] 
Horrid Henry: Go ahead! I'll keep guard of the torch. 
[Peter passes the torch to Henry] 
Horrid Henry: Werewolves don't like light. 
[Henry locks the door on Peter and he gets scared for the dark] 
Horrid Henry: There, [laughs] now he's safe from the werewolf! 
Perfect Peter: Oooohh, it's really dark in here and smelly. 
[Henry laughs and leaves Peter in the toilet on his own] 
Perfect Peter: Henry. Henry? Henry! 
[Henry runs into the French Camper's tent without realising and wakes him up. Henry and the French Camper scream in suprise]
French Camper: Dormez-vous!
Horrid Henry: Oops, sorry, wrong tent!
[The French Camper gets angry] 
French Camper: Imbecil!
[Mum goes looking for Peter and Henry bumps into her] 
Mum: Henry, what's going on? Where's Peter? 
Horrid Henry: Peter? Er... asleep? 
[Peter goes to Mum with leaves in his hair] 
Perfect Peter: [crying] Henry took my torch and left me in the... toilet. 
Mum: Henry! 
Horrid Henry: I know, I'm horrid. Send me home, pleeeaaase! 
Mum: Oh no you don't. Your father wants to be close to nature and that's what we're doing! 
Horrid Henry: Why can't we camp in our back garden? That's close to nature. And proper toilets, too. [Peter likes the sound of that]
Mum: Nonsense, this is our holiday! Come on, Peter. 
[Mum takes Peter back to bed] 
Horrid Henry: I thought holiday were supposed to be fun for everybody. Nature, huh? EUREKA! THAT'S IT! They want to be close to nature, then they're going to be close to nature! 
[Henry scoops some manure and puts on the floor outside Mum and Dad's tent] 
Dad: Aahh!! 
[Dad stepped his foot into the manure] 
Dad: Eurgh! 
[Henry whistles as if he didn't do anything] 
Horrid Henry: Morning, Dad! 
[Dad suspects that Henry did it] 
[Mum hums to Frere Jacques just as Henry opens the gate to let the sheeps out. Mum tried to shoo them away] 
Mum: Eurgh! No, no, no. Come on, shoo, shoo, shoo. Oh, oh, help! 
[Mum falls back from the sheep] 
Mum: Eurgh! 
[Henry laughs] 
Horrid Henry: Go away! Scram! Get out! 
Mum: Oh, thank you, Henry. [puffs] What a mess! [huffs] Stupid, stupid sheep. Stupid... [Mum opens the tent door and five sheep scurry out, scaring her] Ahh! 
[Henry giggles] 
[At night time, Peter woke up because he saw what appears to be the shadow of a werewolf] 
Perfect Peter: AAARGH! 
[Mum hurries into the tent] 
Mum: What is it, Peter? What's the matter? 
Perfect Peter: The w...w...werewolf! 
Mum: There's nothing there. 
[It turns out Henry has used some some clothing pegs to make Bunny look like a werewolf] 
Horrid Henry: Bunny, you are very scary! 
[The next day, Mum, Dad and Peter play a game of cards and Henry sits on his chair] 
Horrid Henry: I’m bored! 
Perfect Peter: I’m not! Can we go for a walk? 
Mum: What a good idea, Peter. 
Horrid Henry: But it’s pouring with rain! 
Dad: Nonsense! Just a spot of drizzle. 
Perfect Peter: Oh, I love walking in the rain! 
[Henry growls, transforms into Tyrannosaurus, hauls Mum and Dad’s tent, stomps on his and Peter’s tent and roars at his screaming brother] 
Mum: Don’t be horrid, Henry! 
Horrid Henry: I’m not going! 
Dad: Fine! You stay here and collect wood for the fire. 
Horrid Henry: Me? Where am I supposed to find wood? 
Dad: In the wood, where else? And make sure it’s dry. 
[Henry climbs over a fallen tree and gets startled by a bird, trips over a tree root] 
Horrid Henry: What was that? I’m out of here! 
[Henry runs back to the campsite but trips over a tent peg and picks it up] 
Horrid Henry: Wow, there’s loads of wood right here! 
[Henry picks up more "wood" around the orange tent. The French Camper is keeping his own fire going while singing Frere Jacques to himself, not noticing Henry. Henry picks up another peg making the man’s laundry fall onto the fire] 
French Camper: Ah! Non! Non! Ah! Qualle horreur! Mes underpants! 
[French Camper stomps and pick up his burnt underpants] 
[A full moon is covered by clouds and the family all roast marshmallows around the fire] 
Perfect Peter: Mmm. Yum yum yum! Toasted marshmallows! 
Dad: Clever of you to find all that dry wood, Henry. 
[Thunder and lightning strikes in the sky] 
Mum: Looks like rain. Bedtime, boys. 
[The raining continues so fast that Henry sees water all over the tent] 
Horrid Henry: What? 
Perfect Peter: Mum! I’m all wet! 
[Henry stands up, only to bump his head in the wet tent] 
Horrid Henry: Yuck! 
[The rain is pouring and the campers are heard muttering as Dad and Mum come out under their collapsed tent to see them all packing up] 
Dad: I don’t understand it. This tent never collapses! 
Perfect Peter: [crying] I want to go home! 
Horrid Henry: Ah, I thought you liked living close to nature? 
Perfect Peter: No! I.. I hate it. I hate it here! 
Dad: Look, if we all just stay calm. 
Horrid Henry: Uh oh. 
[French Camper grunts holding his sticks angrily] 
Horrid Henry: Uh, Dad. 
Mum: What are we going to do? 
Dad: Um… 
Horrid Henry: I’ve got a great idea! 
[The family are finally at Camp Le Fun at last] 
Dad: Well, I guess Camp Le Fun isn’t all that bad. 
Mum: Ah, and it’s so nice to see them playing together for a change! 
Perfect Peter: Um, but is it… [screams] SAAAAAAAAFE!!! 
[Henry hears Peter screaming down the waterslide and splashes] 
Horrid Henry: Ha-ha! Now this is what I call real camping! [slides down the slide] Whee! 
[The episodes fades out with a big splash] 
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