Patrick Does An Elaborate Disney Parody

Patrick Does An Elaborate Disney Parody is an episode of The Silly Adventures of Patrick Star.
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== Part One ==
(A young Princess Sandra is playing with a young Princess Pearl in a castle.)
Sandra: Do your magic! Do your magic!
Pearl: Okay!
(Pearl shoots ice out of her blowhole, causing it to snow inside the castle somehow.)
Sandra: Awesome!
(Sandra takes out a snowboard and slides through the snow.)
Pearl: (builds a snowman) I'll call you "Patrick".
Sandra: (snowboards past Patrick) He looks pretty stupid!
Patrick: I resent that!
Pearl: Wait, did you just tal-
(Pearl notices Sandra snowboarding off a large ramp.)
Sandra: Yee-haw!
Pearl: Sandra!
(Pearl shoots ice out of her blowhole despite the fact that Sandra would have landed safely in the snow anyway, and she accidentally hits Sandra in the face.)
Sandra: I have brain freeze! Literally! (faints)
(King Krabs runs out of his room.)
Krabs: What in Davy Jones' Locker is going on here?
Pearl: I froze my sister's head!
Krabs: Again? Alright, let's go to the trolls.
(Krabs and Pearl bring Sandra to the trolls.)
Krabs: We need you to fix Princess Sandra.
Head troll: Oh, Pat Starwalker's sister?
Krabs: No, we're doing Frozen now.
Head troll: Well, in that case. (waves his hand) Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo. She's fixed. Also, I removed all her memories of Pearl's power. 
Krabs: Why?
Head troll: Because it's convenient to the plot.
Pearl: So she won't remember I have powers?
Head troll: Didn't I just say that? (points to the sky) Look! Images of you getting ripped apart by monsters!
(Pearl screams.)
Krabs: What the barnacles?
Head troll: What? I like scaring children. 
Krabs: We'll be leaving now.
(Krabs takes Sandra and Pearl to the castle. After he locks them into their rooms, he sighs.)
Krabs: This traumatic experience will probably turn Pearl into an emotionally unstable recluse who can't even carry on a conversation with her sister. However, to soften the effect on both her and Sandra, I'll be there for them. I'll be there for them for the rest of my life.
(The next day, Krabs dies.)
Krabs: (as a ghost) That didn't work out how I expected it to. (flies to the great beyond) Well, I guess it can't be a Disney movie unless the parents are dead!
(Ten years later, Sandra and Pearl are at Pearl's coronation ceremony. Plankton, Duke of Chumburg, watches from the audience.)
Plankton: This coronation is a perfect chance for me to make good with the queen, after which I'll unlock the secrets of this kingdom and exploit its riches! (evil laugh)
(Plankton notices that everybody's staring at him.)
Plankton: What? Haven't you ever seen a bad guy before?
(Bishop Squidward places a crown on Pearl's head.)
Pearl: This crown clashes with my dress! (cries) Oh, no!
(Pearl accidentally shoots ice from her blowhole, freezing Squidward.)
Sandra: Well...that was unexpected.
Plankton: (gasps) She's a witch! Burn her!
(Fishes in the audience take out pitchforks and torches.)
Pearl: Who brings pitchforks and torches to a coronation ceremony?
(Pearl uses her ice magic to manuever around the angry crowd. Once she gets outside, she makes a helicopter out of ice and uses it to escape.)
Sandra: Dagnabbit! I've gotta to go after her!
Plankton: You, princess? But who will look over the kingdom while you're gone? I guess if there's no one else willing to do it...
Fish: I'm willing to...
Plankton: Shut up! I guess if there's no one else willing to do it, I will.
Sandra: Sounds good to me! (jumps on a seahorse) Giddyup!
(As Sandra gallops away on the seahorse, an eternal winter begins.)
Plankton: Winter? But it's the middle of August!
(Plankton ends up getting buried in snowflakes.)
Plankton: Not again!
(Meanwhile, Pearl is walking to the top of a sandhill just because.)
Pearl: (singing to the tune of Let It Go)
The snow glows white on the sandhill tonight
Not a footprint to be seen
While I freeze and suffer
Disney rakes in all the green
The wind is howling like this storm inside of me
That's the last time I try Plankton's "delicacies"
What was I saying? Oh right, this
Secret power I can no longer dismiss
I'll shoot out ice until I'm numb
Ignoring my kingdom
Let it blow, let it blow
And shirk my responsibilities
Let it blow, Let it blow
Then disappear for most of the movie
It's okay
Because I'll save the day
Now to create the mess
That I'll have to clean up soon anyway
(Sandra is riding her seahorse in Pearl's direction when a worm jumps out of a nearby bush and attacks them. The seahorse drops Sandra and flees, leaving Sandra to struggle with the worm alone. SpongeBob, who is pushing through the rising snow with Gary a mile away, sees the princess fighting the worm, and he rushes to help her. Sandra ties the worm into a knot before he can do so.)
SpongeBob: (panting) Are you okay?
Sandra: Yeah, but I'm out a seahorse. (notices Gary) Why does that snail have antler-shaped pieces of coral tied to its eyes?
SpongeBob: W-what are you talking about? Gary's not a snail, he's a reindeer.
Sandra: Ooookay then.
Gary: Meow.
SpongeBob: Anyway, where are you going?
Sandra: I'm going to the top of the sandhill to find my sister.
Patrick: What a coincidence! I'm going to the top of the sandhill to find my sister, too!
SpongeBob: Does...anybody else see the talking snowman?
Sandra: (gasps) Patrick! How long have you been out here?
Patrick: Since around the midsection of that terrible Let It Go parody. Why?
Sandra: Never mind. Come on, guys! We have queen to find!
Patrick: Oh, sweet! Which one?
Sandra: Which one? The only one capable of doing all this!
Patrick: (thinks) The Queen of Hearts?
Sandra: No! Queen Pearl!
Patrick: Oh, that was my second guess! What do you want to find her for?
Sandra: So I can bring back summer!
Patrick: Ooh, I love summer! Frolicking under the sun, feeling the warm sand beneath our feet, eating ice cream! I'm especially excited about the ice cream!
Sandra: How do you know so much about summer? You've only been alive for five minutes!
Patrick: Artistic license?
Sandra: Good enough for me! Let's go!
(Sandra, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Gary start walking toward the sandhill.)
SpongeBob: Is anybody going to tell Patrick what happens to snowmen under the sun? Anybody?
== Part Two ==
(SpongeBob, Patrick, and Sandra make it to the top of the sandhill, where there's now a giant ice palace.)
Sandra: When was my sister an architect?
(They walk into the ice palace.)
Sandra: Pearl? Are you in here?
(Pearl walks out of her ice-room at the top of the ice-stairs.)
Pearl: Sandra? Patrick? Other guy?
SpongeBob: My name's
Pearl: Don't care. What are you all doing here?
Sandra: I'm here because I miss you. Patrick's here because he's the lovable sidekick.
Patrick: I'm lovable!
Sandra: SpongeBob's here because...why are you here, again?
(Gary crawls into the ice palace.)
SpongeBob: Gary likes the scenery.
Pearl: I'm sorry, but you all need to go.
Sandra: Why? We just got here.
Pearl: My powers are too dangerous. I don't want you or anybody else getting hurt.
SpongeBob: (laughs) Too late for that! You've already doomed us all with that eternal winter of yours!
Sandra: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Oh, were we transitioning to that?
Patrick: And I thought I was stupid! (takes a bite out of his carrot nose)
Pearl: I...doomed my kingdom?
Sandra: It's not that bad! All you have to do is bring summer back!
Pearl: I don't know how!
Sandra: Then we can do it together! (singing) 'Cause fer the first time in forever...
Pearl: (singing) I was a fool to think that I could ever be free!
Patrick: (singing) I can sing, too! Everybody listen to me sing!
Sandra: (singing) We'll reverse the storm, live happily ever after and all that.
Pearl: (singing) No, you'll only make it worse!
Patrick: (singing) I like ice cream!
Pearl: (singing) You can't control the curse!
Sandra: (singing) Yes, we can!
Pearl: (singing) No, we can't!
Sandra: (singing) Yes, we can!
(Pearl, at the height of her distress, shoots out icicles from all around her. One of the icicles hit Sandra in the chest.)
Pearl: No, we can't!
(Sandra falls to her knees, and SpongeBob rushes to help her up.)
Pearl: Please...leave.
Sandra: (coughs) We aren't going without you!
Pearl: Yes, you are!
(Pearl conjures up a large snow monster who picks Sandra and SpongeBob up and throws them both out of the palace.)
Patrick: There you are, sis!
(Snow Sam, the snow monster, turns around and smiles.)
Snow Sam: Little brubber!
(Snow Sam hugs Patrick.)
Snow Sam: Sorry, brubber, but mommy doesn't want visitors.
Patrick: Don't worry. I completely understand.
(Patrick kicks himself out of the palace.)
Sandra: Now what?
SpongeBob: Sandra, your fur is turning white!
Sandra: (looks at her hand) Well, what do you know? It is!
SpongeBob: I know just who to talk to about this!
(SpongeBob leads the rest of the gang to a valley full of rocks.)
SpongeBob: Meet my friends!
Patrick: Wow! You're friends with rocks, too?
Sandra: Uh, SpongeBob, did you happen to hit your head on anything when that monster threw us out of the palace?
(Suddenly, the rocks flip over to reveal that they're the trolls from earlier.)
Patrick: (sad) Aww. I thought they were rocks.
Head troll: What brings you to us, sponge boy and young troll?
SpongeBob: Gary's a reindeer, not a troll!
Patrick: I thought he was a snail.
SpongeBob: Anyway, I'm here to see if you can fix my friend.
Head troll: Ah, princess. How are you?
Sandra: Not... (coughs) great.
Head troll: (waves his hand) Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo. How about now?
Sandra: I still feel terrible.
Head troll: Oh, dear. She must have gotten stabbed in the heart. The only cure for that is true love's kiss.
Sandra: True love's kiss?
Head troll: Yeah, I know. How original.
Sandra: How will I find a true love to kiss?
SpongeBob: Don't worry! I have another friend who can help you with that!
(SpongeBob whistles through his fingers, and a few seconds later, Sebastian the Crab appears.)
Sebastian: (singing) Sha-la-la-la-la-la don’t be scared. You got the mood prepared. Go on and kiss the girl.
SpongeBob: Who? Me?
Sebastian: (singing) Sha-la-la-la-la-la don’t stop now. Don’t try to hide it how. You wanna kiss the girl.
(The trolls join in.)
Sebastian and the trolls: (singing) Sha-la-la-la-la-la float along. Listen to the song. The song say kiss the girl.
SpongeBob: She's a squirrel!
Sebastian and the trolls: (singing) Sha-la-la-la-la-la music play. Do what the music say. You wanna kiss the girl.
(SpongeBob runs away.)
Head troll: (to Sandra) He's just a bit of a fixer-upper.
(Meanwhile, Plankton is riding to Pearl's ice palace with an army.)
Plankton: Time to put an end to this infernal winter once and for all!
(Suddenly, Snow Sam jumps in front of the army and roars.)
Plankton: That is only ugly snowman.
Snow Sam: Mommy say it's what's on the inside that counts!
(Snow Sam swipes at Plankton's soldiers, knocking them off their seahorses. Plankton manages to get around Snow Sam and rides into the palace.)
Plankton: Come out now, you wretched woman!
(Pearl walks out of her room.)
Pearl: What do you want?
Plankton: We want to know what you did to Princess Sandra! Her horse came back to the kingdom without her!
Pearl: I don't know where she is, and I don't know how you got past my guard, but I suggest that you leave.
Plankton: You're the one who's about to leave...with me! 
(Plankton rides to the top of the stairs, avoiding Pearl's ice blasts. Pearl runs into her room, but Plankton jumps off his seahorse and ducks in after her before she can close the door. Plankton takes out a bow and arrow and aims it at Pearl. However, Pearl shoots an icicle at Plankton just as he releases the bow, causing the arrow to shoot up and slice through the rope from which the chandelier above her is hanging.)
Pearl: That could have turned out better.
(The chandelier falls on Pearl as Plankton watches from behind the icicle. Soldiers run into the room and find an unconcious Pearl on the ground with pieces of ice around her.)
Plankton: Well, what are you waiting for? APPREHEND THE GIRL!
(Pearl wakes up in a prison cell.)
Pearl: (sighs) I guess this is how it all ends.
(Pearl looks down at her handcuffs and notices that they're freezing.)
Pearl: Or maybe not.
(Princess Sandra walks into the kingdom with Patrick beside her.)
Fish: Princess, you're alive!
(The fishes cheer as Sandra and Patrick walk into the palace.)
Sandra: (sighs) I guess this is how it all ends.
Patrick: Don't worry, Sandra. I'm sure that SpongeBob and his snail will be back to see you one last time.
Sandra: It's a reindeer...a reindeer, not a snail.
(Plankton walks out of a nearby room and jumps at the sight of Sandra and Patrick.)
Plankton: Sandra! What are you doing back here and with a strange, starfish-shaped snowman?
Patrick: Hey, I'm not stra-
(Patrick's face starts to melt.)
Patrick: (holds his head in place) Who turned up the heat?
Sandra: You might be better off outside, Pat.
Patrick: You invite a guest into your home and immediately kick him out? I see how it is!
(Patrick, seeing that his feet have melted, slides out of the palace.)
Sandra: Ahh, this not-entirely-appropriate-for-our-time-period air conditioning system will make my final hours much more comfortable!
Plankton: Final hours? You're dying?
Sandra: Yeah, thanks to my sister's short temper.
Plankton: We actually have your sister in our possession.
Sandra: Really? Can I see her?
Plankton: No...
(Plankton jumps onto the thermostat and runs on it until the temperature's below freezing.)
Plankton: You aren't going anywhere.
(Sandra's fur becomes whiter, and she falls to the ground.)
Sandra: (weakly) Why are you doing this?
Plankton: Because I'm evil! Now to kill your sister and take over the kingdom. Been nice knowing you! (salutes)
(Plankton strolls out of the palace. When he gets to Pearl's prison cell, however, he only finds a hole in the wall surrounded by lots of ice.)
Plankton: She escaped!
(Plankton notices freshly made tracks in the snow outside of the hole. At the palace, Sandra is curled up on the floor, her fur completely white now, as Patrick walks back in.)
Patrick: It's feeling much cozier here! (gasps) Sandra?
(Patrick runs to Sandra and drags her outside.)
Patrick: I don't know how, but we're finding you a true love to kiss pronto!
(As Patrick and Sandra leave the kingdom, SpongeBob, who was heading towards the kingdom with Gary, sees them.)
SpongeBob: Patrick! Sandra! It's me!
Sandra: (turns around) SpongeBob?
(Plankton follows Pearl's tracks on a seahorse. When he sees Pearl, he springs himself off the seahorse's tail and lands right on Pearl's shoulder.)
Plankton: Not so fast!
Pearl: Get off me, you insect!
Plankton: I will, but first I've gotta tell you what happened to your sister.
Pearl: What did you do to Pearl?
Plankton: It's not what I did. It's what you did. She's dead because you went all Frozone on her.
Pearl: What? No.
(Pearl starts to cry, and as she does, Plankton quietly takes out a knife and gets ready to stab her. Sandra hears Pearl crying on the way to SpongeBob and Gary, and she turns around again, this time to help her sister.)
Sandra: Pearl! Watch out!
(Pearl raises her head just as Plankton brings the knife down, but the knife shatters on the impact of a frozen arm.)
Plankton: Well, this is awkward.
(Pearl blows Plankton away, and she's horrified to see that the frozen arm belongs to Sandra, whose body is now made of ice.) 
Pearl: Oh, no! (cries again)
(SpongeBob, Patrick, and Gary hurry to where Pearl is.)
SpongeBob: We...failed.
(Sebastian swims in front of them.)
Sebastian: Not yet you haven't!
(Sebastian gives Sandra's frozen body a kiss on the mouth, and she immediately unfreezes.)
Sandra: Sebastian? You're my true love?
Sebastian: Sure, let's go with that.
(The eternal winter ends due to the power of love or something like that.)
Sebastian: (singing) Under the sea! Under the sea! You can't imagine how much we'll pay Disney in royalties!
Patrick: Summer is just as beautiful as I imagined.
(Patrick looks down and realizes that he's melting.)
Patrick: Well, that puts a damper on things.
(Pearl uses her ice magic to reconstruct Patrick as he was before.)
Pearl: You're now made of unmeltable ice.
Sandra: Is that even a thing?
Pearl: If I can build elaborate glacial palaces with zero construction knowledge, I think I can make unmeltable ice a thing.
Sandra: Good enough for me. Still, I can't help but think that we forgot something.
(Bishop Squidward, who is still frozen from before, watches the eternal winter end.)
Squidward: (muffled) Hello? Anybody out there? I'm really wishing this building had some time-inappropriate air conditioning right now.
Category:The Silly Adventures of Patrick Star
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