Follow That Ring!

Follow That Ring! is DanzxvFan8275's eighth entry of Spin Off Kings Season Two. It is also the eighth archive of File 1 of I Simp For Juicy Titties. It was released on June 3, 2020.
==Transcript==
[episode begins with an outside shot of Fancy!, where classical music is played. It is shown that Eugene and Poppy are on a date]
Poppy: Ahh… [taking a sip of wine] You sure outdid yourself, Eugene. This is splendid!
Eugene: Only the best for you! [cuts to his wallet in his pocket as he stretches his eyes down next to it] ...and me wallet.
Poppy: What was that?
Eugene: Uh, nothing! 
Poppy: I see. [they share a kiss before the waiter comes over with the check]
Waiter: Your bill, sir. [bill says $100]
Eugene: [gasps] Uh… hm. Here you go. [takes out money before Poppy stops him]
Poppy: Don’t worry, my crabby cakes. I’d rather go dutch. [takes out $50, officially splitting the check. Waiter walks off with it]
Eugene: Sorry, I’m just not used to seeing such ludicrous amounts.
Poppy: Well, wait until you have to buy something to tie the knot! [laughs, Eugene has a blank expression] You okay, Eugene?
Eugene: Yeah… I just… nevermind.
[cuts to Eugene driving Poppy home in his boat. He then walksher up to the door]
Poppy: That was a magical night, big red. I can’t wait to see what dates we’ll have in the future.
Eugene: Well, we have been together for 20 years. What about those dates?
Poppy: I’m thinking they can be even better than that. You know. Closer together. [winks, as Eugene sheds another sweat, realizing the code he’s cracking]
Eugene: Right. Heheh. [they kiss on the lips right before Poppy goes in the door, Eugene starts to panic] Holy shit! I haven’t realized it’s been so long… 20 years and I still haven’t taken the next step! I know what I need to do.
Narrator: The Next Day…
[Eugene makes his way into a jewelry store. He stops himself once he sees a surveillance camera watching his every move]
Eugene: Arghargharghargh! So the Patriot Act has come to full fruition. [shows him from the view of the camera, showing him moving around and staring at the camera. One of the store workers comes over]
Worker: Sir, are you gonna look at the jewelry or just try to make a fool out of yourself in front of the government?
Eugene: [stops dancing] Oops, sorry. I need your finest engagement ring! I’m planning to tie the knot tomorrow.
Worker: I see. Well, I might just have the best ring for you!
Eugene: ...well actually, it’s for my girlfriend.
Worker: You knew what I meant. [waves him over] Come take a look.
[they make their way over to a ring in its very own glass case. A zoom in on the ring shows that it is wrapped with diamonds and made out of 24k gold. There is one bigger diamond on top.]
Worker: Welp, here’s our greatest one.
Eugene: Oooohhhh…. Mrs. Puff will love this one!
Worker: That’s what you call your girlfriend? What, is that some sort of fetish?
Eugene: Nah, but the show thinks it is. I don’t get why. [looks off for a second] Anyway, what’s your asking price?
Worker: Oh… [inhales] kinda forgot about that. But, this is what we have it as. [hands him a card, to which Eugene’s eyes pop out of his head in shock]
Eugene: WHAT?! $10,000?!?! Don’t you think that’s a bit much?
Worker: Well, sir, must I remind you what it’s made of? Surely you can’t put a price on love.
Eugene: No, but I can put a price on- you know what. [writes a check] I’ll take it. But only because I love her more than me money. [worker takes check]
Worker: Excellent choice. [hands him the ring in its case] Take good care of it! You wouldn’t want to lose something as precious as that.
Narrator: The next, NEXT day…
[cuts to the Krusty Krab. SpongeBob, Squidward, Patrick, and Pearl are decorating the place up]
Eugene: Everything MUST be perfect! Patrick, keep stringing those lines.
Patrick: Got it! [flashes a thumbs up and continues to string lines across the Krusty Krab with dental floss]
Eugene: Squidward, keep sculpting!
Squidward: [sarcastically] Aye aye, captain. [continues to nail at a wooden sculpture]
Eugene: SpongeBob, make those steaks!
SpongeBob: Yes sir, Mr. Krabs sir! [takes Krabby Patty meat and molds it into the shape of a sirloin]
Eugene: Pearl, keep squirting water from your spout into the fountain!
Pearl: Dad, this is stupid. Why can’t I go shoe shopping like I was gonna do with my friends?
Eugene: This is an important time in your life. You’re about to get a new mom. [places claw on her] Everything needs to be special!
Pearl: [sighs] Fine. [shoots water from her spout into a stone fountain. Cuts to Eugene pacing the floor as Squidward comes over]
Squidward: Mr. Krabs, why is this budget so cheap? Don’t you want Mrs. Puff to be pizzazzed?
SpongeBob: Yeah. Pizzazz! [waves his arms around to make a rainbow]
Eugene: That’s weird, boy. [turns to Squidward{ Well, you see, Mr. Squidward, I spent almost all of my proposal savings on this here ring. [pulls out the ring holder and opens it, showing the ring. Everyone awes.]
SpongeBob: So that’s where my yearly salary went to!
Eugene: Actually, both of yours. Listen, she’ll be coming any minute now. Any last improvements need to be done now. I’ll be in me office, tell me to come back out when she pulls in.
SpongeBob, Squidward, and Patrick: Yes, sir.
Pearl: Hopefully she’ll take me with her… 
[scene cuts to the crew adding the finishing touches to the place. A banner made of dental floss, a statue of Eugene and Poppy, a fountain, and a table for two is shown. Poppy is shown pulling into the parking lot from outside]
Poppy: I wonder why Eugene wants me to come here so bad. [gets out as SpongeBob sees her and goes to the door]
SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, Mrs. Puff is here! [knocks on door; no response] Mr. Krabs? [opens door to see Mr. Krabs on the floor sobbing] 
Eugene: GET AWAY BOYO! I’M A FAILURE!
SpongeBob: How? You’ve got a girlfriend who you’re about to make your wife!
Eugene: I can’t! I lossed me ring! Er- her ring.
SpongeBob: What?! How? It was in the case.
Eugene: It must’ve fallen out! [crying again] What am I going to do?
SpongeBob: Well, maybe you can stall he- I mean, spend some quality time with her.
Eugene: But lad! I don’t want to last another day without her as my fiancée. [gets up and shakes SpongeBob] Eh… alright fine. As long as you guys find the ring!
SpongeBob: Sure thing. [pushes Eugene out of the office, causing him to walk out the door and greet Poppy]
Poppy: Eugene! [shocked] What’s going on here?
Eugene: Well, er, Poppy- I just, eh… wanted to take you on the greatest trip around Bikini Bottom!
Poppy: Sure. [chuckles] But didn’t we do that last week?
Eugene: We sure did. But this will be different! I can count on that. [cuts to wallet in his pocket] Hopewfully I can count on me wallet too. [cuts back] Come on!
[cuts back to SpongeBob, Squidward, and Patrick in the Krusty Krab. SpongeBob is commanding them]
SpongeBob: Alright guys, we have to find Mr. Krabs’ ring.
Squidward: What’s in it for us?
SpongeBob: We can raid his safe. [whispers] I know the combination.
Squidward: You son of a bitch, I’m in.
SpongeBob: Okay, so… where do we start? [thinks] Probably his office.
Patrick: Oh come on, I could’ve thought of that! 
SpongeBob: Shut up. [dashes into office and looks under desk]
Squidward: What does it look like again?
SpongeBob: Gold surrounded by diamonds. Or, you know, the only engagement ring in the restaurant. We can’t let Mr. Krabs down! Got that- Patrick! [cuts over to him eating one of the Krabby Patty steaks] Stop that.
Patrick: Oops, sorry.
[cuts to Eugene and Poppy walking around town]
Poppy: Is this part of the surprise?
Eugene: Oh, uh… sure is! Let’s have some fun together.
Poppy: Eugene, my senses are tingling. Something is up.
Eugene: There sure is. Look! [points up at a hot air balloon flying through the sky] 
Poppy: Is that for us? [gets hearts for eyes] You sure know how to impress me! [hugs him]
Eugene: [concerned] Heheh… me money. But sure!
[cuts to them going on a hot air balloon trip, with Eugene sitting worried throughout the entire trip. Poppy is loving every second of it as they go through a cloud making a heart shape. Cuts to them getting off of the ride]
Poppy: That was wonderful, Eugene! I enjoyed every second!
Eugene: Yeah, so did I. [whispers] I wish I could be enjoying something else, though…
Poppy: What was that?
Eugene: Er… nothing. Let’s just say I have quite the surprise for you!
Poppy: Like another hot air balloon ride?
[Eugene has a deadpan expression. A montage ensues of Eugene and Poppy enjoying several moments together while “Pretty” by Lil Yachty & TheGoodPerry plays in the background. In the first scene, they’re playing a game of cornhole, where Poppy sinks every shot and Eugene barely hits anything. A guy then comes over charging Eugene for the game, to which Poppy becomes even more happy. Then they’re on a speedboat ride, which creates an outline of Eugene and Poppy in the water. Again, Poppy is enjoying the ride, while the driver charges Eugene. Eugene then nearly gets swept away by the breeze. Next, it cuts to a movie theater where the two are watching Goofballs, and everyone in the theater laughs at a part except for Eugene. The usher then walks into the aisle, charging Eugene again. The montage wraps up when Eugene pulls into a cliff while watching the sunset]
Poppy: Today has been magical.
Eugene: [chuckles] It sure has! Although I wish it could be doing better.
Poppy: Why’s that? It’s not because of your money, is it? [leans it] That stuff’s addictive.
Eugene: Well… kinda. No offense.
Poppy: [laughs] Well, Eugene, you always were a kidder.
Eugene: It’s… it’s something else. [they share a kiss] How about you stay here while I spend the last of me money on parking. [gets out of the car and runs over to behind a tree. He pulls out his phone and dials SpongeBob’s number. It then cuts back and forth from Eugene and Poppy.
SpongeBob: Hey Mr. Krabs. Are you wowing Mrs. Puff?
Eugene: I sure am. [turns mad] But I want to be wowing her with a nice $10,000 engagement ring! [starts fuming] Did you find it yet?
SpongeBob: No, we haven’t. We’ve looked everywhere, but we can’t find it?
Eugene: Did you check the register?
Squidward: [picking up the register and putting it back down] Not there.
Eugene: Hey, don’t treat her like that! [turns back to SpongeBob] What about under the table?
Patrick: [checking under] Nope. [starts chewing the gum under]
Eugene: Maybe it’s in the fryers? 
SpongeBob: Well-
Eugene: WAIT, NO! Don’t check it. I can’t bring my mind to that. [sighs] Look, boy, I’m out of money. I can’t keep stalling her!
SpongeBob: Well I’m sorry, sir. You might just have to improvise.
Eugene: The only thing being improvised here is me money! [gets mad again] Just keep looking. We’ll come back now. [hangs up] Argh… [a tool booth conductor comes over]
Conductor: Hey buddy, you gonna pay for that parking spot or not?
Eugene: Argh. [pays up as it cuts back to the Krusty Krab. The three of them are standing in disbelief.]
SpongeBob: Man… we really failed Mr. Krabs.
Squidward: Who cares? It’s his fault he lost the ring. If anything, he failed himself.
SpongeBob: Eh, maybe you’re right.
Patrick: All of this failure makes me hungry. [goes over to find a Krabby Patty on the table next to the grill. He takes a bite, but then hits something hard during it.] Ow! [the ring falls out of his mouth; SpongeBob looks in shock.]
SpongeBob: Patrick, that’s the ring! [runs over] What was it doing in that Krabby Patty?
Patrick: I don’t know. Maybe it adds flavor. [thinks] He did say it’s made of 24 carrots.
Squidward: 24 karats of gold, numb cock.
Patrick: Oh.
SpongeBob: It’s all covered in grease now. [runs over to the sink] Gotta wash it off. [turns on faucet and washes the ring. It cuts to Eugene and Poppy turning onto the road the Krusty Krab is on, with the place in sight]
Poppy: We’re going back there?
Eugene: Yeah, hopefully there’s something there. [whispers] Come on, SpongeBob.
[cuts to him washing it again]
SpongeBob: It’s… almost.. th [drops the ring mid sentence, as it hits the water and the edges of the drain] NOOO!!! [cuts back and forth between Eugene and Poppy walking into the restaurant and the ring rolling around the drain] Please… [the ring falls down the rain in slow motion as it shows SpongeBob shouting as a result]
Squidward: Pfff… welp.
[shows Eugene and Poppy walking into the Krusty Krab. They see all of the decorations]
Poppy: [gasps] Eugene! This is amazing! Is that a fountain? [shows the fountain]
Eugene: Yeah! I don’t know how considering we’re under water but eh.
Poppy: And are those sirloins for us? [shows the table]
Eugene: They sure are!
[cuts to them eating them, but SpongeBob runs out of the kitchen]
SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs!
Eugene: SpongeBob! [jumps up] Where is it?
Poppy: Where’s what?
SpongeBob: It went down the drain! [breathes heavily] I tried to clean it off and it went down the drain!
Poppy: Hm?
Eugene: SPONGEBOB! [shakes him] That ring was $10,000! [drops him] It was supposed to express our love! 
[Poppy gets up expecting the situation]
Poppy: Ring? Our love? Eugene, what’s the meaning of this? 
Eugene: [turns around and inhales] Poppy… I can’t keep this up any longer. I… I was gonna propose to you today.
Poppy: [gasps] You what?
Eugene: I was gonna throw you a celebration tonight. But I lost my ring. [starts sobbing] The perfect ring for you, and I lost it! [starts rolling on the floor in despair]
Poppy: Well, I’m surprised. [starts looking around] And I think you should be as well.
Eugene: [stops crying] Huh? What is that supposed to mean?
Poppy: I love you more than anyone in the world. [goes to hug him] And these adventures we’ve had all these years have been exceptional. I’d made my decision. I wouldn’t rather spend the rest of my life with anyone else in the world.
Eugene: Same here, Poppy! But uh… [sniffs] I wish I could tie the knot right now.
Poppy: I’m not finished. It’s really ironic that you want to propose to me, because… [reaches in her back pocket] I had the same idea.
[Eugene’s eyes pop back out in shock.]
Eugene: You.. what?
Poppy: Eugene Harold Krabs… [gets on her knee and opens the case] ...will you marry me? [starts to blush as Eugene stars in shock. His body then pops out of his exoskeleton as he jumps around in excitement] So… is that a yes?
Eugene: [stops jumping and puts his exoskeleton back on] Yes! Yes, of course! [Poppy puts the ring on Eugene’s ring finger, as the two of them
embrace themselves and kiss. The camera then pans over to SpongeBob and Squidward]
SpongeBob: Aww…. it all worked out.
Squidward: Yeah, yeah, now what’s the combination to the safe?
SpongeBob: Well, just like Mr. Krabs, I have something to admit as well. I don’t know the combination, I was just saying that so you’d come along.
[Squidward gets mad and slams his hat against the ground]
Poppy: These adventures you’ve taken me on have been magical lately. They’ve reminded me of our true, everlasting love. I decided the time was right.
Eugene: Hey, great minds think alike, right? [both of them start chuckling and then share another kiss. The camera cuts to the outside of the Krusty Krab zooming out. Then it pans over to the Chum Bucket where Sheldon and Karen are both standing outside]
Karen: Wow… that was beautiful. [sheds a tear]
Sheldon: Yeah, even I gotta respect that. But Krabs kinda looks gay with an engagement ring on him. [Karen slaps him across his face]
Karen: SHELDON!
Sheldon: Oops… sorry.
[episode ends]
==Trivia==
*This episode came third place in Round 8.
Category:I Simp For Juicy Titties
Category:DanzxvFan8275
Category:Episodes written by DanzxvFan8275
Category:2020
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Category:Transcripts
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Category:Spin-Off Kings
Category:Spin Off Kings Season Two
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