Burns, Baby Burns

"Burns, Baby Burns" is the fourth episode of Season 8.
==Synopsis==
Mr. Burns is reunited with his illegitimate, boorish, middle-aged son, Larry, and when Mr. Burns disowns him, Homer comes up with a harebrained kidnapping plan to get Mr. Burns to take Larry back.
== Full Story ==
The Simpsons take a trip to an apple cider mill, where they meet Ned Flanders, while Marge is glad to get out of the house, Homer on the other hand is angry that he is missing the game. Meanwhile, Mr. Burns arrives on his his train back home from a college football game. The train is stopped for a few minutes due to a couch being shoved on the tracks. A few yards away from the train, a souvenir stand operator, Larry, sees a perfect opportunity to sell some stuff, until he sees Burns on the train, pulls a wallet out of his jacket, compares a picture to Burns, and stands there in shock at the realization. He hitches a ride to Springfield from Homer and the family (Homer calls Larry a hitchhiker) who are driving back from the cider mill (although it takes them till the end of the drive to pick him up). They drop him off at Burns's mansion, where he meets Mr. Burns. At first Burns is irritated at him for ringing his door bell after hours, but his irritation turns to shock when he learns that the man is his estranged son, Larry Burns.
After checking his scalp for the family birthmark, Mr. Burns discovers Larry is, in fact, his biological son. He tells the story of his conception in which he had an affair with Larry's biological mother, Lily Bancroft, at a Yale reunion. The two then attempt to put together the foundation of a constructive relationship. Burns takes him to a gala which he immediately regrets as the formality of the event clashes with Larry's casual demeanor. As a result he unintentionally insults the people with jokes and embarrasses Burns. To keep Larry out of his hair, he gives him a job at the plant, where he and Homer become fast friends. Larry invites Homer over for dinner. During dinner, Burns becomes fed up with Larry and starts to hate him as a son. Homer suggests they plan a fake kidnapping, which they go through with. When Burns hears of the kidnapping, he is in fact outraged because he felt like someone was stealing from him by kidnapping his son.
thumb|left|Burns and Larry having a heart to heart talk.Homer and Larry hide out in the basement until Burns declares his appreciation for Larry. Marge doesn't want Homer pulling any more fake kidnappings and demands him to bring Larry back, but he objects, saying there are cops everywhere and it is broad daylight. She insists he bring him back and he leaves. Just when they go, Marge sees that on the news, they have found them out in broad daylight and with cops everywhere. They drive off to find a hiding place and take shelter in a movie screening room no one will see, but Hans Moleman calls the police when they disrupt his viewing. When the theater is surrounded, the Simpson family watch the TV in horror as Homer is brutally gunned down and killed by the police, only for it to be a simulated possibility and that Homer and Larry are still alive and watching the movie. They quickly hurry to the theater. Larry and Homer manage to evade the police but are soon surrounded. Just when Chief Wiggum is about to shoot Homer for real, Larry steps in and admits he supported the idea of getting himself kidnapped. Homer then explains that it was an attempt to earn a father's love. Burns tells Larry that while he is and always will be his father, he can't be the family he needs, which doesn't upset him, since he has a wife and kids he should get back to (as it had been a week and he had made no effort of letting them know of his whereabouts). Larry declares since everyone is there, they should start a party. A party ensues, complete with alcohol and music coming out of nowhere, which confuses Marge and Lisa. Homer tells them that it doesn't have to make sense as he enjoys the party.
== Citations ==
fr:Le Fils indigne de M. Burns
pl:Burns, Baby Burns
pt:O filho do Sr. Burns
ru:Бёрнс, сын Бёрнса
Category:Mr. Burns Episodes
Category:Episodes
Category:Episodes named after a character
Category:Episodes featuring guest stars
Category:Homer episodes
Category:Episodes named after Mr. Burns
Category:Simpson Family Are Pariahs episodes
Category:Directed by Jim Reardon
Category:Written by Ian Maxtone-Graham
Category:Episodes with alternate end credits