Gravity Falls: A 4-Dimensional Mystery/Transcript

== Pre-show Transcript ==
TBD.
Dipper: And now for a brief intermission to see how things are going.
Mabel: Hi, everyone! It's me, Mabel. Dipper and the gang are getting the show all set up, so we should be starting real soon. Oh! I forgot. Just a little reminder to everyone, please don't put on your 4D mystery goggles until you are seated inside the main theater. Thank you. Bye-Bye!
TBD.
== Safety Announcements ==
=== Holding Area ===
Soos: Sup Dudes, I’m Soos. Are you ready for the show? That's great, 'cause I'm getting ready to open these here automatic doors. Please be sure to stand clear of the doors 'cause when I push the button, they're gonna open towards you. Now, uh, where'd that button get to? Oh, Mabel! Can you help me out here?
Mabel: Oh, hey Soos! I think it’s this button.
(The disco theme from the end credits of “The Hand That Rocks The Mabel” begins playing and the room turns into a disco. Dipper hears this and storms in, deactivating the disco.)
Dipper: Guys! Did you try to activate the disco button?
Mabel, Soos: UUUUMMMM…
Dipper: Come on guys, we talked about this! THIS button opens the doors. Now I need to go and get ready for the show.
(Dipper storms off.) 
Soos: Oh, there it is! Ready? Here we go!
=== Main Theater ===
Soos: Oh, hey guys! Now that you're here, go ahead and pick a row you want to sit in, and keep stepping until you're all the way across. I’m lookin’ at you, buddy. Keep it moving! And for your safety, please don’t put on your special mystery goggles or whatever until someone tells you. Thanks.
Wait, how’d this get unplugged? (tries to plug in the cable in his former break room) Ow! Wait Wait… Ow! Wait Wait…
== Main Show ==
Mabel: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls! We ask of you to please refrain from eating, drinking, or using flash photography during today's show. All right, everyone. Put on your mystery goggles because it's time to present my brother Dipper Pines and the paranormal properties of this town! Soos, Wendy! LIFT THOSE CURTAINS!!!
Soos: You got it, Mabel.
Wendy: Okay or whatever.
(The curtains are lifted to begin the show.)
TBD.