The Ordinary SkyWing Who Would Really Just Like To Go About His Life, Thank You Very Much

Note: This is not meant to offend anymore. It is merely me parodying some Wings of Fire cliches I have noticed, in the book series as well as in fanfiction. If your character or fanfiction employs some of these cliches, this does not mean that they are bad, or that you need to change them. I am merely using and exaggerating these cliches for humorous purposes. Also, if anyone would like to have their character in this, you may request that in the comments. Just know that I will be parodying them, and most likely exaggerating any cliches you used in the making of them. With that said, enjoy! 
== Chapter 1: Apparently All The SkyWings Are Super Into Death Now ==
The minute Peregrine woke up, he knew something was wrong. Probably because the dragon who greeted him at the door was a firescales, even though Peril was the only firescales dragon in hundreds of years, and half the dragons he passed on the way down the hall were either firescales or hybrids.
When he got to the room where he normally sorted papers, the Queen of the SkyWings was there. "Hi!" she said. "My scouts saw something by the Sea Kingdom, so I want you to go investigate." She then handed off a baby dragonet to a guard. "This one has been deemed unsatisfactory. Kill it."
Peregrine was very confused. "Your Majesty, I'm not a scout. Also, how did the scouts get over to the Sea Kingdom that quickly? It takes at least two days to fly there and back."
She waved a talon dismissively. "Eh, pretty much everyone is a guard. Now, time for the gladiator battles!"
Peregrine was starting to wonder if Queen Scarlet had come back in disguise somehow, but it didn't really matter. If the Queen wanted him to go over to the Sea Kingdom, he would.
Another dragon came up to him. "I'm secretly in a forbidden romance! Don't turn me in, please!"
Peregrine shrugged. "I won't, I guess?" He spread his wings, which were large, but not as large as everyone else's wings, which had apparently doubled in size overnight. Something weird was going on in the Sky Kingdom, but really, it wasn't Peregrine's business to figure out what it was. He just wanted to live his life, and be completely and totally ordinary.
== Chapter 2: Hybrids Are Everywhere, Somehow? ==
As Peregrine was flying, which he'd been doing for almost a full day, his wings got tired, and he decided to take a stop at Jade Mountain. The moment he landed, a cheerful gold dragon grabbed him by the claws and dragged him inside. 
"Do you want to join the school? Okay, great! You'll go in the Jade Winglet, where all the super special dragons go! The original Jade Winglet isn't here anymore, but I'm still running the school. Don't try to figure out the timeline. It doesn't matter."
He was thrust into a cave, which was filled with six different dragons, all of whom appeared to be hybrids. "These are your clawmates!" Sunny said. A NightWing appeared beside her. "This is Fatespeaker!" the NightWing and Sunny said at the same time. "Now get to know your winglet!" They walked out, claw movements exactly the same in every way. It was kind of eerie, if Peregrine was being honest. 
The dragons smiled at him. "Hi!" one said. "Let's go to art!"
"Um, I'm really not supposed to be here..." Peregrine said. 
The dragons, who appeared to be a Rain/Ice/Night hybrid smiled. "I'm Awesome! I'm Moon's half sister, and school is amazing isn't it? Now let's go to art! I know you want too. I'm a mindreader."
"I really don't though," Peregrine said, although he could already tell he didn't really have a choice.
As he walked down the hall, he noticed something strange. All the dragons who weren't in the Jade Winglet were like statues. When he went up to one, they said, "Hi. My name is Whatever. It's nice to meet you." They then walked on, still repeating that like a mantra.
Peregrine was starting to get freaked out. He needed to get out of Jade Academy as soon as possible and get to the Kingdom of the Sea, like his queen had told him to do. But before he could sneak out a window, he was pulled into the library by Awesome, where a black dragon wearing a bandage over his eyes was kissing scrolls.
He turned. "Oh, hi! Are you Peregrine?"
Peregrine looked confused. "How do you know my name? I wasn't even supposed to be here, and even if I was, there are several SkyWings at Jade Academy, if I'm not mistaken. Even if you can tell one from the other, how would you know my name?"
Starflight shrugged. "It doesn't really matter. By the way, would you like to hear about how much I love scrolls?"
Awesome smiled at him. "Sure! But first, can I have a scroll about animus magic? I'm definitely not an animus. I'm just curious." She edged towards Peregrine and whispered, "I'm an animus. Don't tell!"
"Sure? And why did you tell me that, Awesome? I didn't know. You could have kept it a secret." Peregrine said, sitting down and listening to Starflight give a passionate speech about his love for scrolls. But he wasn't really listening. All he was thinking was that he needed to get out of Jade Mountain as soon as possible. Not to figure out what was going on-- that wasn't his job or his business. More to preserve his sanity than anything. Hopefully the Kingdom of the Sea would be less insane...
== Chapter 3: New-Born Dragonets Can Survive In The Wilderness! Who Knew? ==
Peregrine was starting to get hungry, so he headed to the prey center, thinking about how all this could have happened so fast.
When he got into the prey center, he noticed several cow skeletons. Sitting in the middle of a pile of melons, eating them one by one was a MudWing, who appeared to be in amazing shape despite all the food he was eating. 
"Um. hi?" Peregrine said.
The dragons stood up. "Oh, hi! I'm Clay! Want some of this hippo? It's so good. Seriously, it is delicous. I can eat it all myself though, if you don't want it."
Peregrine was going to ask him something, but this dragon didn't seem all that helpful. He turned towards the exit, only to see a dragon coming in. A hybrid. Seriously, was every dragon here a hybrid? And this dragon had... four wings?
The dragon seemed to pick up on his confused expression and smiled. "I'm a NightWing/HiveWing hybrid."
"I don't know what a HiveWing is."
"That's okay!" the dragon said. "My name is Darkflower. Do you want to be friends? I want to be friends with everyone, as long as they don't try to kill me. Someone tried to kill me when I was a dragonet." She looked down and fiddled with her talons. "But you probably don't want to hear about that."
"They tried to kill you?" Peregrine said. "It seems like maybe that would have made you a little bit less trusting of other dragons." Peregrine didn't know much about it, since no one had ever tried to kill him, but this dragon didn't act the way he would have expected a dragon who had been almost killed very young to act.
"Well, not exactly, but they left me alone when I had just been born and I almost burned to death."
"You aren't angry at them for doing that?" Peregrine said. "You aren't worried that other dragons might abandon you." He didn't really care about this dragons problems, but maybe if he could figure out what was going on with her, he could figure out what was going on with the rest of the world.
Darkflower shrugged. "Not really. I just want to help people." 
Peregrine thought for a moment. "How did you survive in the wilderness alone? You didn't eat any poisonous berries or anything."
"Nope," she said, hunching down her shoulders. "I'm very good with healing herbs. I learned that out there, if you ever need to be healed or anything."
She left leaving Peregrine to think about how and why any of this was happening to him. His normal job sorting papers was so much more simple than all of this. He had always been an ordinary dragon, and all he wanted was to go back home to his ordinary job and his ordinary life.
== Chapter 4: Why Will These Dragons Not Evacuate The School? ==
Peregrine looked over at Awesome. Wait, where did she come from? And how are we on a hilltop? Wasn't I just in the prey center? 
Awesome smiled at him. "It was an abrupt scene change. Don't worry about it."
Peregrine was very confused. Yeah, Awesome was a mind-reader, but what was she saying about abrupt scene changes? That was a thing in scrolls, not real life. Unless...
Awesome giggled. "Really, don't worry! Lets fly!"
Peregrine wasn't sure flying was what he wanted to do right now, but he was a SkyWing, and SkyWings loved to fly. Besides, she was right. He didn't need to worry about this. If he did that, then he'd have to start investigating, and being heroic or whatever, and that was the last thing he wanted to do. 
He looked up at the sky. The sun had almost set, and they still hadn't had any classes. "This is a school, right? Why are there no classes?"
Awesome laughed again. How did even her laugh sound perfect, high and giggly and fun. "Classes would distract from out secret powers, and mysterious backstories. That's what school is all about, after all!"
Peregrine raised one eyebrow, wondering what the moons was going on with this dragons brain. For a mindreader, she seemed oddly clueless about what other dragons thought. "That is definitely not what school is about."
Awesome wasn't listening to him, though. Of course she wasn't. "That reminds me, what's your secret past? Tell me all your secrets!" Awesome took off into the sky, forcing Peregrine to follow her. Somehow, it took him a while to catch up, even though his wings were much larger than hers and he should have been able to soar ahead of her easily. Even if he hadn't been a SkyWing, he was an adult and she was a dragonet, meaning he should be much faster than her. 
Before Peregrine could answer that he didn't have any secrets, and even if he did, there was no reason why he would be telling her, he heard a roaring noise. He turned to Awesome. "That sounds like a tornado." 
Awesome shrugged. "Oh, don't worry about that. The teachers will take care of it."
Peregrine probably could have flown away. He wanted to fly away, so that he wouldn't have to deal with any of this, but he probably shouldn't leave Awesome to face a tornado alone. 
He saw Sunny standing gathering everyone in the big meeting room and flew into listen. "Everyone! Please give us a day or two to figure out what to do about the tornado. Don't leave yet. We can figure this out, together, and stop the tornado!"
He already knew what was going to happen. They weren't going to evacuate, and they wouldn't listen to reason. So Peregrine snuck out the side, and started flying towards the Sea Kingdom.
== Aaaaaand The Sky Is Black Now: With Apologies To DragonSiren22 ==
Peregrine was flying over a small island in the sea. He was exhausted from the long flight, but he saw an egg on the island and figured maybe he shouldn't land. As he was hovering, thinking about it, the egg burst open and the sky turned completely dark. Peregrine couldn't even see his own talons.
"What..." he said, but his voice was drowned out by the roar of a huge shadow, which was shouting, "Darkness! Darkness! DARKNESS!!!!!!!!!!!" Three hybrids were also on the beach, staring at the giant shadow dragon with mixed expressions. One was bewildered, one seemed annoyed, and one was jumping up and down and clapping their talons together. 
The Rain/Night hybrid, the one who had looked annoyed, went up to the shadow dragon and whispered in their ear. They gave a groan and went. "Fine. But still, I will cover the world in DARKNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Once the dragon finished saying darkness, the sky turned back to normal, the hybrids vanished, and the only thing left was a small dragonet crawling around on the beach. 
"Huh," Peregrine said. "That was weird." 
 This has been a very short interruption to parody Solar! We now return you to your regularly scheduled fanfiction.
== Why Are There So Many Lost Princesses In The Sea Kingdom? ==
Category:Joke Pages
Category:Fanfictions
Category:Fanfictions (Incomplete)
Category:Fanfictions (Fanon)
Category:Content (Colorchanger the Mindreader)
Category:Genre (Comedy)