Electrolyzer vs. Rancor vs. Pohatu vs. Craniac

<Previous Battle	Next Battle>
Amset-Ra, Invizable, and Tee-Vee walk up to the front door of Jabba's Palace. Amset-Ra knocks on the door, and the security droid pops out of the door and accidentally hits Amset-Ra in the face.
Amset-Ra: Ow! Watch it!
Invizable: Good thing I don't have a face to get hit.
Amset-Ra: But you do have your glasses.
Security Droid: What do you want here at Jabba's Palace?
Amset-Ra: We would like to stage a battle at the-
Security Droid: Hold it. I recognize you as Amset-Ra from Amset-Ra's Fighting Pyramid. You've had two matches on this planet so far.
Amset-Ra: Three if you count Alien vs. Lord Garmadon from last season, which was held in Mos Eisley Cantina.
Security Droid: Whatever. Anyway, you may enter.
The door opens, and everyone troops inside.
Invizable: Ooh, I don't feel so well. I gotta lay down.
Invizable leaves.
Amset-Ra: Well, we'll need a new announcer. Ogel is still in jail, Wyldstyle is still bullying Lord Business, Morro lost his car keys, and-
Dr. Inferno: Can I do it?
Amset-Ra: Losers don't announce. Anyway, Eglor only announces the finals, and-
Bib Fortuna enters with Benny.
Bib Fortuna: You wanna wonga?
Amset-Ra: Hey, thanks for the announcer, Bib! Let's see what you've got!
Benny: SPACESHIP! Spaceship spaceship spaceship SPACESHIIIIIP!
Amset-Ra: That's the worst announcer I've ever seen. CORONA!
Benny: SAAAAAACESHIIIIIIIP-
Ding!
Frenzy: What about ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Amset-Ra: Well, I don't know about-
Frenzy: I'll give you five hundred DOLLARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In CASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Amset-Ra: Deal.
Frenzy: Welcome to Amset-Ra's Figting PYRAMID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Today's match will take place in the RANCOR PIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Leia:' Unhand me, you creep!
Jabba: Sap.
TC-17: I had no idea that you spoke exactly like the great Hypaxxus-5.
Frenzy: In the Rancor Pit is none other than the Rancor HIMSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rancor: RAWR!
Frenzy: Dropping into the Rancor Pit first is the master of lightning-
Jay: Me?
Frenzy: ELECTROLYZER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Electrolyzer: Nyahahahahahahaha.. You zhall be reduzed to azhez onze I am finizhed with you!
Frenzy: Dropping into the Rancor Pit second is the master of stone, POHATU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pohatu: Golden Mask or none, I'll defeat you!
Frenzy: Dropping into the Rancor Pit third is the master of... of... Ah, just forget it, it's CRANIAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Craniac: I will win, because there is no Mace Windu to stop me.
Amset-Ra: Jabba and Bib Fortuna will be giving awards today.
Jabba: Bosa malakulu TheAnonymousA.
TheAnonymousA: I still won't be known!
Bib Fortuna: Bosa obetia Bansha.
Bansha: Vooooote meeeeeeee iiiiiiiiiin...
Frenzy: Before being dropped into the Rancor Pit, Oola and a Gamorrean Guard will give their PREDICTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oola: *gulp* R-r-rancor...
Gamorrean Guard: Squeal!
Oola: He said Pohatu.
Ka-chunk!
Oola and Gamorrean Guard: Aaaaaahhhhh...
...
...
Amset-Ra: Tee-Vee, start the match.
Tee-Vee: Boot rancor_sequence.exe.
Jabba's throne slides over the trap door, and a TV screen is put in front of him.
Pohatu: Protector! Protect me!
Pohatu's radio clicks to life.
Protector of Stone: I can't for three reasons: 1. Amset-Ra says no outsiders are allowed, 2. I'm afraid of the Rancor, and 3. I'm too busy fighting the Skull Spiders.
Pohatu: I see.
Electrolyzer: Nyahahahaha... Let'z zee how you like LIGHTNING!
ZAAAAAAAAAAAAP!
Pohatu: Ugh... short... circuiting...
Frenzy: Electrolyzer just shocked Pohatu really HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Tee-Vee, is he ELIMINATED!!!!!!!!???????
Tee-Vee: Eliminated: Pohatu = False.
Frenzy: OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Craniac: Eat some lasers, you big Rancor!
Rancor: RAWR!
SMASH!
Craniac: Are you able to crush bone that easily?
Frenzy: Those moves are SELF-EXPLANATORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Amset-Ra: Announce them anyway.
Frenzy: FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Rancor just smashed CRANIAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rancor: RAWR!
Electrolyzer: Hungry, boy? I hope Craniac will zuvvize!
Toss! Gulp!
Rancor: Burp!
Tee-Vee: Elimimated: Craniac.
Frenzy: Rancor just ate CRANIAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I need to consider buying him for my Cooking with a Crazy Crook RECIPES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Electrolyzer: Now, Rancor, let'z give you a ztomachache, zhall we?
Pohatu: Groan...
Frenzy: Pohatu is STIRRING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pohatu: Protector! Protect me!
Protector of Stone: Remember my answer from earlier?
Pohatu: Well, let's just say that Amset-Ra repealed his rule, Rancor is eliminated, and you won your battle.
Protector of Stone: Deal.
The Protector of Stone falls through the trap door.
Rancor: RAWR!
Chomp!
Protector of Stone: HEY! My staff is not a chew toy!
Electrolyzer: I already gave him one; hiz name iz Craniac! Now, allow me to charge my lightning launcherz and-
Protector of Stone: Lightning!
Zap! Dodge!
Electrolyzer: GIVE ME ZOME TIME HERE!
Protector of Stone: NO.
Frenzy: Protector, where did you get your STAFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Protector of Stone: I got it at a buy one get one not-so-free sale at-
Amset-Ra: Let me guess... Brickmart?
Protector of Stone: How did you know?
Amset-Ra: People are always bringing up those running gags.
Pohatu: I thought they didn't have Brickmarts on Okoto.
Protector of Stone: I imported it from Heartlake City.
Electrolyzer: CONZTRUCT!
Clockclickclickclickclick!
Amset-Ra: What a surprise. It's his own vehicle.
Frenzy: I'm announcing HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Amset-Ra: I know.
Electrolyzer: PREPARE VOR IMMINENT DEZTRUCTION IN TEN!... NINE!... EIGHT!...
Pohatu: Boomerangs!
Prop!
Rancor: RRAAWWRR!!
Frenzy: As Electrolyzer begins his countdown to dropping his EMP bomb, Pohatu has propped Rancor's mouth OPEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Electrolyzer: ZEVEN!... ZIX!...
Protector of Stone: C'mon, staff... charge already...
Pohatu: Boomerang!
Wooshwooshwoosh... CLONK!
Rancor: RARGH!
Frenzy: A direct HIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Electrolyzer: VIVE!... VOUR!...
Protector of Stone: Almost done...
Snap!
Pohatu: My boomerang!
Frenzy: Rancor snapped the boomerang like a BONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Electrolyzer: THREE!...
Protector of Stone: ONE!...
Electrolyzer: TWO!...
Protector of Stone: TWO!...
Electrolyzer: ONE!...
Protector of Stone: THREE!...
ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP!
Frenzy: The light is too bright to see ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh wait, they're both ELIMINATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tee-Vee: Referee job status: Stolen.
Pohatu: Eat boomerangs, Rancor!... Oh wait, I tried that and it didn't work... Aha!
Chopchopchopchopchopchop!
...
Tee-Vee: Winner = Pohatu.
Frenzy: Pohatu repeatly chopped Rancor with his boomerangs like an ONION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Amset-Ra: CORONA!
BZZZZZZZZZZNNNNNNNNN...
Frenzy: Eeeeeennnnddd trraaaaannnnnsssmmmmiiiiiisssssssiiiioooooonnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
Ding!
Shortly before the transmission ends, Malakili starts crying, so Bib Fortuna throws him in the dungeon.
Amset-Ra: Well, our Tattooine vacation is already over.
Anubis Guard: Amset-Ra! Pharaoh Hotep accidentally broke the fourth wall!
Amset-Ra: And I don't even have insurance for that...
End Transmission.
<Previous Battle	Next Battle>
See the Fighter Rankings as of this battle.
<poll>
How much did you enjoy Electrolyzer vs. Rancor vs. Pohatu vs. Craniac?
1 (Least)
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10 (Most)
</poll>
Category:Season 2
Category:Round 1 Battles