Transformers Ü

Listen. Transformers is one of my favorite franchises. I saw all the movies and I thought I could just go see them all again, but I’m not made of money.
I looked up the movie on one of those streaming sites, and I found all of them, but there was another movie that…. Shouldn’t have existed.
The film’s title was “Transformers Ü”.
I guess you were supposed to pronounce it like Transformers You", but the letter U had those weird fuckin' dots over it, so I wasn’t sure if that was supposed to be a creepy-ass grin or a letter u. I clicked on the film anyway.
The Universal Studios opening then started playing, but a massive dark xiibuss took the logo and began laughing and saying
“MINE ALL MINE.”
Before the title “TRANSFORMERS” appeared in front of a black screen.
I almost jumped into the fucking air in shock when the film opened on some terrible and raspy cover of the Transformers theme song, mixed with pieces of metal hitting each other and someone with Garfield's voice and with an italian accent making dubstep, as the camera overlooked a car cementery, showing someone with a tow truck, piling up multiple destroyed cars, forming a T-Posing transformer as he said with an ear-bleeding voice "TRANSFORMERS ARE THE SHITEEEHHHH!!!"
WHAAAAAAAAT THE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL?!?!?!?!
Suddenly, Zurg came crawling out of a dumpster with a goddamn Glock and began pulling the trigger, before a LOUD raspy voice said "OH FUCK!!!!!" and everything switched to animation.
I was seriously wondering what kind of fucking drugs whoever made this shit was on when GODDAMN Mr. Potato Head appeared. He was on a computer trying to uninstall the 200 viruses that bumblebee got from TikTok.
But suddenly, Henry fucking Albatross from GarfieldFan1997's Funnypastas appeared out of nowhere, whipping out a fucking molotov and throwing it at Mr Potato Head destroying half of Bumblebee fucking house in a massive explosion.
The scene changed, and EN-
What the hell?
ENA from Joel G appeared out of nowhere.
she trying to fucking carjack some guy who can't even get out of his fuckin’ car.
Then Zurg appeared AGAIN on screen as he started muttering “Fuck Hanna-Barbera" over and over again.
What even was this movie? Where the fuck were the transformers at? I mean, half of the scenes were just random shit!
We then see Newspaper Fucking Zombie from Plants mo-fuckin Vs Zombie reading Newspaper about 9/11, which dosen't make any fucking sense because popcap wasn't disrespectful to World trade center attacks.
(Hewkii your turn.)