M.E.G Orientation

Greetings, new recruit. Welcome to your new job as an explorer for the Major Explorer Group! 
As you might be a newcomer to this place, allow me to give you a short brief on what the Backrooms re.
The Backrooms are an infinite expanse of various pocket spaces with anomalous properties, known by many as “Levels”. Additionally, there are many anomalous lifeforms here. These are known as “Entities”, and….
Ah, fuck this script. The higher-ups don’t care about most of you anyway. Alright, here’s your actual job.
Your job is to put your ass on the line going out there and take notes and pictures about some random place called “Level 2939034” or some bullshit, and live long enough to send it back to the outpost for some random archivist to assemble into a somewhat decent article on the database.
You’ve been chosen for this task because most of you have zero valuable skills and serve no purpose besides being cannon fodder to satisfy this group’s curiosity about whatever the fuck they send you to chase after for the week.
If you’re smart about it, you might even survive the ordeal long enough to get promoted into a position that doesn’t have an average life expectancy of under a year. So, here’s how to do that.
First of all, you'll need to know what the hell you're doing. In general, there's gonna be around two types of missions you'll be doing.
The first is what I like to call “Wandering Missions”. Basically, whenever leadership can't find something for you to do, they send you out into the wild with some supplies and hope you find something. 
These are by far the easiest jobs you'll be doing. Just walk around a level for a bit and take some notes to try and pretend you were actually doing something worthwhile. Now, if you actually happen to find something new, take a quick picture and get the fuck outta there. I've seen far too many people die because their curiosity got the better of them.
Anyways, the other one is what I like to call “Wild Goose Chases”. These are by far the worst, but if you do them enough, it'll probably convince the guys in charge to promote you.
Anyways, how these go is usually that the archivists send you to go find a level from some rumors. Don't worry, though. First, they'll send a scout to interview random people who claim to have seen the thing, and then proceed to tell you fuck all. 
…Listen, this is a thankless job.
Regardless, now you've got a shitty overview of what you have to find. Now, you better start writing your obituary, because there's a good chance that you'll die on the mission. Usually in an extremely painful way.
My advice? Take anything you can from the outpost. Hell, maybe even steal if it's needed. Chances are you have next to zero idea about what's in the level, or even how to get out. Stockpile on some Almond Water and a knife or something.
Do things quickly. Get in the level, take the notes, take the pictures, and get the fuck out. You don’t want to be the unlucky guy that gets ripped apart by a Hound on the mission.
But hey, it isn’t all bad. If you do manage to get promoted, they’ll give you a lot of useful stuff for your service. Usually a good amount of Almond Water, the occasional gun, and some other pretty useful objects. We also have pretty good medical care.
I advise you to find something to get good at so the higher-ups will promote your ass. If you’re good at taking notes, they’ll promote you to an archivist. If you’re good at fighting entities, they’ll promote you to guard duty. If you’re good at interviewing people, they’ll promote you to a diplomat. I could go on and on.
Either way, you’ll probably go insane in the hellscape sooner or later, so make the best of it. After all, it could always be worse.
You could be working for the A.E.G.
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Author: Stormy
Category:Tales
zh:何为M.E.G.
Category:M.E.G