Tennis the Menace/Quotes

:Lou: Hey Chief, we're gonna bust up that crack house tonight.
:Wiggum: We did that last night.
:Lou: Yeah, but this time we got the right address.
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:Homer: Hey, that's great. Listen, I need a new doubles partner. My little girl's a lead weight.
:Serena Williams: You're dumping your own daughter?
:Homer: Yeah, but only to crush my wife and son!
:Serena: That's horrible!
:Venus Williams: Yeah, that's pretty low.
:Homer: (to Venus) Hmm.. you seem less disgusted, let's go!
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:(At the human chessboard on the grounds of Burns Manor...)
:Black pawn: Hey, Burns has been gone for a while.
:Black rook: (whispering) Let's make a run for it.
:(They leave.)
:Black king: Come back, fools! Protect me!
:(The white queen, a white rook, and a white bishop beat up the undefended black king, while the remaining black rook watches, powerless to help.)
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:Smithers: Oh, where did you buy that novelty hand, sir?
:Mr. Burns: This? Oh that's just fluid collecting.
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:Marge: And it's gonna do wonders for our social life!
:Homer: Yeah, it’s nice to entertain friends and have people over.
:Ned: Hey, you got a tennis court?
:Homer: Keep walking, Flanders.
:Ned: Will do...
:Homer: Faster!
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:Grandpa: (singing) What's new, Pussycat? (cracks his knee) Owww, ow ow ow ow! What's new, Pussycat? (cracks his back back) Ohhhhh, God noooo!
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:Homer: (In a psychiatry session with Lisa) It's obvious what's happening. I'm being replaced by a younger more in-your-face version of me!
:Lisa: Dad, you're just going through a classic oedipal anxiety. You remember the story of Oedipus, don't you?
:Homer: Hm... maybe five bucks would refresh my memory.
:Lisa: (Sighs) Oedipus killed his father and married his mother.
:Homer: Ugh! Who pays for that wedding?
:Lisa: I'm just saying you feel threatened by Bart, but it's all in your head.
:Homer: You're right. But just to be safe, maybe I should chain him up!
:Lisa: Dad! I think you're overreacting.
:Homer: I think you're underreacting!
:Lisa: This session is over!
:Homer: This session is under!
:Lisa: Goodbye! (leaves)
:Homer: Badbye!
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:Bart: Telegram for Lisa Simpson! (pretends to open envelope)
:Homer: Don't listen! It's a trick!
:Bart: "Dear Lisa, Psyche! Psyche, psyche, psyche! Signed, Super Psyche".
:Homer: I think he's trying to psyche you out.
:Marge: Look, we're all trying to have dinner, so why don't we just psyche, psyche, psyche!
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:Homer: (embittered) Traitors! (throws pom-poms at the car, shattering the windows by mistake) Uh oh! (takes cover by hiding himself from inside the house) I don't think they saw me!