Doh's Henry Hideout/Chapter 1

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Doh walked through a field somewhere in northern north Americaland. Dark clouds drifted across the daytime sky. Winds blew across the field, blowing grass to Doh’s face. Small flakes of snow began to drop from the sky.
Doh continued walking across the mysterious field, lost in thought.“What am I doing here?” he asked himself.
Suddenly, he tripped on an Osaka. He got up and looked at the mysterious thing which he had tripped on, observing it carefully. He rubbed his finger across the creature’s chest, only to be startled by the Osaka jumping.
“BWAH!” shouted Doh in surprise. “...W-what are you? Some sort of osaka?”
Then something popped out from a grave and that guy said “I AM STILIOSE AND I HAVE AWOKEN FROM THE DEAD!”
“Ohai,” Osaka said. “Uh, HENRIES, WAKE UP!” Osaka stomped his feet on the ground in an attempt to wake up the other Henry Mails with the loud noise.
“What the fuck was that for” said Marzipan as he was angry for Osaka interupting his beauty sleep.
“Fwaaza... mnngg. Lemme go back to... sleeeeppppp,” groaned Sprak.
“NO, FUCK YOU,” Osaka threw his other shoe at Sprak’s face. He now had no shoes.
“Uh, what’s going on here...?” Doh asked.
“I have no fucking clue,” answered Middy, slowly awakening.
Marzipan then got his blanket and put it over his body so he can sleep some more.
“...I’m cold,” said Sprak, nearly frozen due to the fact that spraks freeze easily.
“Uh! Hello there, sir! Who are you? I’m not a pervert!” Osaka exclaimed to Doh.
Doh turned around and slowly began to walk away.
“No, wait! We need your help! The fate of Los Estados Unidos depends on it!” Tenshi exclaimed, adding Spanish to his sentence because all Spanish people do that.
“Whoa, man, you know Spanish?” Doh asked Tenshi, surprised.
“Me too!” shouted Osaka. “Como estas la biblioteca en tu hijos.”
“What...?” Doh asked. He then turned his attention to Tenshi. “¿Podrias decirme tu nombre?” Doh asked Tenshi.
“Hola, mi nombre es Tenshi. El es Osaka, y es muy extraño y pervertido, pero ya te acostumbraras...creo” answered Tenshi.
“Uh, guys... why don’t you just speak a language we all understand?” asked Sprak.
“...---...” Midpulse replied in morse code.
“Anyways, you should come with us! We need a backup member! You know, just in case someone dies of dysentery.” said Mason.
“Umm... Ok I guess I’ll go with you guys and pervert,” said Doh confused.
“Yaaaay!” Osaka exclaimed. “Now, you must suck my penis as your entrance fee.” Osaka nodded and began to unzip his pants. He smiled pleasurably.
“Actually I need a new hat, how about he just has to give me his hat?” said Sprak.
“Okay, he’ll do so after this is all over,” Osaka said. “Now we just need to find Psychotic- OW!” Osaka was struck in the head by one of Henry’s flying envelopes.
“Henry!” Stiliose exclaimed. He began to strip his clothes off for his god.
“Uh... yeah, sorry about him,” said Sprak. “He’s been driven insane by the terrible smell of Mason’s peverting.”
“Shut up,” Osaka responded. “Now, allow me to pray before I read the letter aloud.” Osaka bowed down to the ground and closed his eyes. He got up about a minute later and opened the envelope.
It read, “Hey, you fecking idiots, you didn’t even stand a chance against Psycho Guill last time, what makes you think you can beat him just because you find him? No. You won’t beat him that way. You have to find the Seven Special Artifact Things, scattered across the world. Mapman can find them with his magic powers. They’re already on your path. Good luck.”
“See, I told you that going to the North Pole would be meaningful,” Mapman said, already locating the Seven Artifacts.
“Oh suck my north pole,” Osaka replied, giggling silently at his own maturity.
“Wait a second,” Doh said. “I know who Henry is! I read your first fic!”
“Well, we’re kinda trying to get to an Atlantic island,” Osaka said. “Guys, let’s get in the wagon and stop wasting time.
Osaka and the other six Mails got in the wagon. Osaka sat in the driver’s seat, sighed, and happily began to drive through the field.
“Maybe if we get the first artifact, we can make the wagon magically boat!” said Sprak as he put on his comfy new hat. “So, where is the first one?”
“I dunno, but we’re coming up on Fantendo hotel!” Mapman pointed out. “Also we’re about to cross the Canadian border.”
Suddenly, out jumped a small, Henry child. He looked much like the recognizable god himself. The wagon came to a stop as they looked at the child.
“What the hell do you think you’re-” Osaka started, but was interrupted.
“Excuse me, sir, but we’re on our way to the North- wait! This is where the Artifact is located!” Mapman exclaimed.
“YES. MY FATHER ENTRUSTED ME WITH THE HENRY ARTIFACT!” exclaimed the young man. “I AM TECHNICALLY A GOD OR SOMETHING I THINK.”
“So, are you Henry’s son or something?” asked Doh.
“Yes! I am Henry Jr.! And I have your artifact that you need to save your island or something,” he continued. “The only way I’ll allow you to have this is if you defeat me in battle or something! Hah!”
“Fuck you,” Mapman said.
“I NEED MORE LINES,” said Stiliose.
The seven Mails then proceeded to step out of the wagon and to enter battle.
“Thanks to my new hat, I have 3x ATTACK POWER!” shouted Sprak as he hurled his sword at the child.
The sword went straight through the child’s heart. He gasped for breath, then looked down at the sword that impaled him. He looked down at the bleeding attack and screamed.
“Uh, are you okay?” Osaka said.
“Henry wouldn’t be happy if we killed his son,” Stiliose said.
Sprak pulled the sword out of the child’s heart. Blood exploded from Henry Jr’s. body. He fell to the ground without a word. Sprak’s sword was covered in blood.
“I think you overdid it,” Mapman said. “He said we were to BEAT him, not kill him.”
“We killed like seven waifus plus more random people we found in the anime worlds though so I don’t think killing is a worry anymore,” Osaka said.
“I don’t think it’s possible to kill a god with nothing but a sword,” said Sprak.
Henry Jr. slowly got up. He was no longer covered in blood, and no sign of an attack was seen on his body. “Hah! You win!” The boy disappeared, leaving a container of some mysterious liquid on the ground.
“Hmm... What are we supposed to do with this again?” Sprak asked.
“Just keep it safe, mang!” Osaka said.
Sprak responded by putting the vial in his hat. The seven Mails got back into their wagon. Osaka, once again, sat down in the driver’s seat.
“Now!” Osaka shouted. “Onward, to Fantendo hotel! Where we hopefully won’t burn anything down and we can talk with our old pals and write more Henry Hideout!”
Osaka began to drive the wagon forward. The seven Mails looked ahead as they approached the skyscraping Fantendo Hotel.
END OF CHAPTER.
Category:Chapters
Category:Doh's Henry Hideout
Category:Fan Fiction