Trying Swimming Trunks at New Look... in a Fitting Room

==Info==
Ed Gamble enlists James' help with his fitting room swimming trunks. It's all going pretty well until Greg and Josh appear mid-change! (Contains some strong language and adult humour).
==Transcript==
Ed Gamble: Hold on, I've an idea. You take the instructions and go out and read them out to me.
James Acaster: Oh, that's better.
Ed Gamble: In the light. OK, love?
James Acaster: Are you ready, love?
Ed Gamble: I'm ready whenever you are.
James Acaster: "Expose the relevant area."
Ed Gamble: What the fuck does that mean?
James Acaster: Get your knickers down.
Ed Gamble: Ha-ha! No sooner said than done. OK, go ahead, James.
James Acaster: "Open your swimming trunks and take off your clothes."
Ed Gamble: Oh, the goggles!
James Acaster: Is the trunks goggley?
Ed Gamble: I can't get the fuckin' thing open. Hold on, I have it. I have it. All right. God, it's freezing. OK, James, I'm changed.
James Acaster: "Remove the ring from your finger and apply it firmly to the area."
HE REMOVES HIS RING
Ed Gamble: God, now I'm trying to go around fuckin' corners here. Argh, it's stuck to my arse!
James Acaster: Are you all right, Ed?
Ed Gamble: Hold on, hold on. OK, I have it. OK, now what?
James Acaster: Now wait for three minutes and take off your shoes and socks briskly. That means fast. Yank it off.
Ed Gamble: James, I can't see me fuckin' watch.
James Acaster: Well, count to 180.
Ed Gamble: OK. (QUICKLY) One, two, three, four, five, six, seven...
PHONE RINGS
Josh Widdicombe: Hello, Mr Acaster.
James Acaster: Matthew's not here, pet. Come back later, love.
Josh Widdicombe: I'm just leaving this here for him. He told me to put it in the aisle.
James Acaster: No, no! Put it in the till, pet. Go on, put it in the till. It's Josh.
Ed Gamble: Close the curtains. You're blowing the arse off me!
Greg Davies: Hiya, James. Who was that at the door?
Josh Widdicombe: It was me. Are you delighted to see me?
Greg Davies: Oh, piss off, Josh. James, where's Ed?
James Acaster: He's not here, love.
Ed Gamble: 73, 74, 75...
Josh Widdicombe: He is. He's in there.
James Acaster: No, he's not.
Ed Gamble: 120...
Greg Davies: She was, but she not.
Ed Gamble: 154...155...
Josh Widdicombe: That sounds like his voice.
James Acaster: It's not. Shut up, you.
Greg Davies: James, where is he?
Ed Gamble: 178, 179, 180.
LAUGHING
SCREAMING
Ed Gamble: Ta-da!
Greg Davies: Are you all right, Ed?
Ed Gamble: Yes. I feel like I'm in my swimming trunks. Hello, James. Go on in. I'll follow you in. Little bastards. What's all this about?