Survivor: Tiki Jungle

The ninth chapter of Total Drama: Tiki Jungle, posted on March 19, 2011.
==Story==
"Last time on Total Drama: Tiki Jungle..." begins Chris, "We had a fun little treasure hunt! Arthur was being ridiculously annoying, as usual. Some highlights were: singing about walking, asking others about their tight glutes, and teasing Trey about his man purse-- I mean, satchel. Anyways, the Terrible Tikis actually won this time! Poor old Over Nine Thousand voted out Octavia. It is still a mystery who did that, besides Arthur and Helga! Will we find out the culprit? Will the Tikis win again? Find out today!"
The Terrible Tikis are in the winners cabin. Nic is being rowdy.
"It's Friday, Friday! Gotta get down on Friday! Everybody's looking forward to the weekend, weekend!" sings Nic.
"Dude, that song has been featured on numerous other shows already. Think of somethin' else." groans Julia.
"What song would you like, Abby?" asks Nic.
Nic moves his belly to the shape of a mouth. "Well, Nicky." says Nic, pretending to be his stomach. "I think you should keep singing that song."
"But it ain't even Friday, dawg!" says Devin.
"Yeah, whatevs." says Julia. "Anyways, how nice is this cabin?"
"Very." says Nic.
"So, why do ya think Octavia was... You know, eliminated?" shudders Julia.
"I think the votes were rigged." says Nic.
"But who be doin' such a terr'ble thang, dawgs?" asks Devin.
"There's only one way to find out." says Julia. She tiptoes to the Over Nine Thousand cabin, and opens the door. The cabin is pitch-black.
"ARTHUR!" she screams.
Arthur wakes up, groggily. "Whaaaat was that? And why is a dumb Tiki in our caaaaabin?" he asks.
"Did you rig the votes?" asks Julia, pointing a stick to Arthur's throat.
Arthur snaps the stick. "Nope." he says.
"You got lucky. But I'll be watching you, punk." says Julia suspiciously.
Julia leaves the cabin.
After she leaves, Gary wakes up.
"What was that about?" he asks.
"I think Julia was mad about ol' Octy bein' eliminated." says Meg. "Can't say I blame her."
"I do." says Helga, who is reading "Mary Lotter and the Heavenly Hollows".
"All right, that book is good, so I won't get mad at you this time." says Gary.
"Who do you think voted for Octavia?" asks Trey.
"Aw, shut up." says Helga.
Trey looks at Helga strangely.
Helga says in the confessional, "I hate Trey. The dude is so ridiculously shady, it's not even funny. I think he's secretly some mastermind and excellent strategist. All I know is that he's going home tonight. That is, if I can get the others to vote with me."
Chrissy is twiddling her thumbs.
"Who do you guys think is the hottest guy singer?" she asks.
"Dustin Nutria, for sure." says Meg.
"Hey. Where's Gary?" asks Arthur.
Gary is in the confessional. "DUSTIN NUTRIA? That guy sings like a dying horse! If I wanna get Meg, I have to exercise my singing voice." He begins to sing. "Bay-beee, bay-beee, bay-beee, ohhhh!" He then stops. "I give up."
"I am a guy, so I do not find other guys hoooot." says Arthur.
"Well, that's sorta obvious." says Chrissy.
"Attention, all campers." Chris says over the loudspeaker. "It is time for the next challenge!"
"But it's midnight." groans Gary.
"Too bad!" says Chris.
Chris meets the contestants deep in the forest.
"Why does the challenge have to be at night?" asks Trey.
"This challenge is based on one of the most iconic TDI challenges. In fact, it's an exact replica of it!" says Chris.
"Oooh, is it the phobia one?" asks Nic.
"Nope." says Chris.
"The boot camp?" asks Chrissy.
"Non." says Chris.
"Is it th' muddy water-skiin', dawg?" asks Devin.
"Eww, no." says Chris.
"Well then, what is it?" asks Gary hopelessly.
"The camping challenge!" says Chris.
"Dude, that one is not iconic. In fact, I can't even remember who got voted out in that one." says Arthur.
"I think it was Sadie." says Meg.
"Katie, you idiot." says Helga, still reading.
"Or was it Tyler?" asks Trey.
"Anyways..." says Chris angrily.
"Guys, it was Eva. Remember, she got mad when Heather stole her MP3 player?" asks Julia.
"That was in the Awake-a-thon one." argues Nic.
"ANYWAYS..." screams Chris.
Everyone is quiet.
"That's better." grins Chris. "Now, onto the challenge. You guys will be forced to sleep in the woods tonight. Then, at 8:00 sharp, in the morning, you guys will come back. First team to come back wins invincibility, blah, blah. Your tents are not provided."
Everyone grumbles.
"Build 'em outta wood or something." says Chris.
"A'ight." says Gary. "Let's go, team. We can't lose this again."
"Oh, and watch out for dire wolves!" says Chris.
"Dire what?" asks Meg suspiciously.
"Prehistoric wolves. Native to Tiki Island. They eat flesh and stuff. Now, see ya!" says Chris nonchalantly.
Devin looks paranoid.
"I be a bit scared o' th' dire-wolves, yo." he says.
"Ree-lax." says Julia. "He's probably kiddin'."
A large shape moves through the trees,
"Nope, he wasn't kidding." says Nic. "Now, do any of you guys have tents?"
"I's got a bunch o' pants, yo." says Devin. "We could drape 'em over some sticks."
"Actually, that's not a bad idea." says Julia.
The Terrible Tikis make a fort out of Devin's pants.
"Great, now let's go to bed." says Julia.
Devin takes out a can of beer.
"Hey, aren't you a little too young to be drinkin' beer?" asks Nic.
"No. No I isn't." says Devin.
He pops some beer into his mouth.
"Underage drinking is never right." says Nic.
"I could report you to Chris." says Julia.
"Yeah, and then I's gon' vote ya out, dawg." says Devin.
Meanwhile, the Over Nine Thousands are walking.
"I am not gonna sleep in sticks." says Helga.
"All right, what are we gonna sleep on? The ground?" asks Chrissy.
"Sure." says Gary. He takes out a sleeping bag and gets in.
"Who wants to massage my bunions?" asks Arthur.
Chrissy backs away.
"My morbidly obeeeese bunions..." says Arthur.
Everyone else practically flees.
"Or you could massage my loose peanuts." says Arthur.
"Shut up." says Trey.
"Hey guys, wanna hear a joke?" asks Arthur.
"Sure, I love jokes!" says Meg.
"Pete and Repeat sat on a wall. Pete fell off. Who was left?" asks Arthur.
"Repeat." says Gary.
"Pete and Repeat sat on a wall. Pete fell off. Who was left?" says Arthur.
"Repeat." says Meg.
"Pete and Repeat sat on a wall. Pete fell off. Who was left?" says Arthur again.
"Dude, that's not funny." says Trey.
"WHO WAS LEFT?" asks Arthur.
"Repeat." says Trey anxiously.
"Pete and Repeat sat on a wall. Pete fell off. Who was left?" says Arthur.
Chrissy takes out a roll of duct tape and puts it on Arthur's mouth.
"Pwwww awnd Wwrwwt schmrt wn w wwll. Pwwww weww--" asks Arthur.
Chrissy punches him in the gut.
Meanwhile, the Terrible Tikis are in their tent.
"Hey, what's that scratchin' at the door?" asks Julia.
"Yo' momma." says Devin.
"Ha ha, so funny." says Julia.
"Uh, guys, I don't think it's your momma." says Nic.
"What is it?" says Julia.
"Remember what Chris said about... Dire wolves?" asks Nic anxiously.
"Yeah. Lemme guess, there's one?" asks Julia.
"Yep." says Nic. He vomits in Devin's backpack.
"'Ey, dawg, there was gum in dere!" says Devin.
The Tikis get into their sleeping bags and hop out of the tent. They see the dire wolf, which is gray with green leaves and twigs covering it.
"AAAAAUGH!" screams Devin.
The dire wolf growls.
"What do we do with the tent?" asks Julia.
"Here. I am buff. I can move it." says Nic. He tries to push it, but gets a splinter.
"AAAAAUGH!" screams Nic.
Julia walks up to the dire wolf.
"Hey, you aren't scary." she says.
The dire wolf roars.
"AAAAAUGH!" screams Julia.
Meanwhile, the Over Nine Thousands are being hyper.
"Double, double, this, this, double, double, that, that. Double this, double that, double double this, that." Chrissy and Meg are playing a hand game.
"Shut up, guys." says Helga.
"Way to be a party pooper." says Chrissy.
Gary is burrowed in his sleeping bag.
"Hey, I'm gonna play a prank on Trey." says Arthur, poking Gary.
"What could it be?" asks Gary.
"All right, so right now, he's planning on giving himself a 'shower' by dumping buckets of water on his head. He had to run an errand, so he's not here right now. Watch what I do to his buckets." says Arthur.
"This can't be good..." says Gary warily.
Arthur pees in Trey's buckets.
"Ugh, that's so gross, but hilarious at the same time." says Gary.
The two boys fist-bump.
Trey comes back from his 'errand'.
"Watch this, ladies." says Trey. He dumps the buckets on his head.
Gary and Arthur laugh hysterically.
"Haw, haw, haw." says Arthur.
"What's so funny?" asks Trey. His hair is glowing now.
"Do you know what I did to those buckets?" asks Arthur.
Trey runs away screaming.
"You're so friggin' nasty, Arthur." says Chrissy. She takes off her shirt, wearing only a bra.
"Hehehehehe." says Arthur.
"If you stare at my chest, I am going to kill you." says Chrissy.
Gary is grumbling in his sleeping bag.
"What's wrong, Gar?" asks Meg.
"Schmrt." says Gary.
Arthur and Chrissy are fighting, Trey is screaming, and Helga is scolding her team.
"GUYS, SHUT UP! I'M TRYIN' TO SLEEP!" screams Gary.
Everyone stares at Gary.
Gary burrows even deeper into his sleeping bag, and starts throwing a tantrum.
Meg says in the confessional, "Wow, everyone is acting weird today. Maybe it's because we lost last time."
The Terrible Tikis are still running from the dire wolf. They eventually run back to the campsite.
"Hey, Tikis." says Chris. "You just won again."
"YES!" screams Nic.
"Hopefully our winning streak will continue next time." says Julia.
"Actually, next time is the merge." says Chris.
"Aww, noodles." says Devin.
"But you guys have invincibility, and the cool cabin, again." says Chris. "See ya."
Team Over Nine Thousand is trudging along.
"We lost again." says Gary.
"Thanks, Captain Obvious." says Helga.
The team sees Chris.
"Hey, gang, ready to vote out another player?" asks Chris.
"Sure thing." says Arthur.
Arthur says in the confessional, "Bye, Helga. You're the only one more annoying than me and my loose peanuts. But I must say, I think Trey is also sorta poopy. I mean, he didn't show any emotion this challenge, and his almost-girlfriend was just voted out."
Helga says in the confessional, while reading, "Meg."
Chris meets the team at the elimination ceremony.
"Hello, helloooooo..." he says. "Tonight, the first marshmallow goes to Gary."
Gary gets his marshmallow.
"Chrissy is safe, as well." says Chris.
Chrissy gets her marshmallow, then grumbles.
"Arthur, and Helga." says Chris.
Arthur waddles up to get his marshmallow, but is bumped into by Helga.
"Meg, and Trey. The last marshmallow goes to..." says Chris.
"Trey." says Chris.
"Me? What the crap, guys?" asks Meg.
"I didn't vote for her." says Chrissy. "I think Helga was the only one who did."
Gary is sobbing.
"I am so sorry, Meggie..." he says between tears.
"Aw, Gary. I'll miss all of you guys." says Meg. She hugs Gary.
Gary grins happily, and holds on to Meg for a long time.
"Let go." says Meg.
Gary mumbles something.
"All right, well, see ya." says Meg.
"Nice knowing ya." says Chrissy.
Meg boards the Raft of Losers, and floats away.
"All right, then." says Chris. "Who is the mystery voter? How will the kids react to the merge tomorrow? And, will Gary become an emotional wreck now that Meg is gone? Find out next time!"