All You Need Is Badly-Written Love Notes

The ninth chapter of Total Drama: Superstar Showdown, posted on August 7, 2013. After Roz receives an anonymous love note, Chef Hatchet and Smoothie Guy interrogate the contestants one-by-one to find the culprit.
==Story==
“Last time on Total Drama: Superstar Showdown, I was feeling really lazy and decided to have the contestants fish! Obviously it made room for tons of drama, including Arthur being Arthur, Chelsey being Chelsey, and Alex being lazy. The Swagged Out Citrus Fruits’ winning streak didn’t last much longer, for they sadly lost the challenge and were forced to send one of themselves home. Trick was targeted for being a pompous, strategy-obsessed douche, but the girls had other plans and eliminated Alex instead for being lazy and annoying! Nic also got some Estrella action, hitting on her as well as Chrissy... again. And finally Layla has been pretty quiet lately, what could she possibly be up to? Find out all the answers to these burning questions and more today on Total Drama: Superstar Showdown!”
The Swagged Out Citrus Fruits are shown returning from elimination.
“I’m glad we got that guy out,” says Trick. “He really decreased our team’s morale, if you know what I mean.”
“Well, you decrease our morale by simply existing,” Estrella says rudely. “I’m going to bed. Don’t disturb me unless you want to go through a portal and end up in the Dark World.”
“Yeah. Uh, me too,” says Trick warily. “Night.”
“Greetings,” Nic suddenly appears next to Chrissy. “I figure we could socialize, and compare favorites. What say you?”
“Favorite what? Way to make you go away?” says Chrissy. “Look, Nic, I’m really tired and--”
“Now, now, we must do this,” Nic says. “All right. Favorite color? Mine is the deep silky orange of Alejandro’s buff stomach. My dream is to make Abby look like that.”
“Yeah. I like gray. And basically everything except the deep silky orange of Alejandro’s buff stomach,” says Chrissy.
“Swaggy,” winks Nic.
“Yeah, nice try, that’s not a word,” says Chrissy dryly.
“Now, now. Dustin Nutria believes it is,” says Nic. “Speaking of singers... erm, well, that term is used quite loosely when it comes to him, but what is your favorite style of music?”
“You know those really obscure bands that nobody knows about?” asks Chrissy. “Yeah, those.”
“Oh, well, uh, I was figuring you liked spicy mambo music, because, uh...” begins Nic.
“Nope. Hate it. Reminds me of this one Mexican restaurant at home that always plays mambo music and serves burritos, and burritos remind me of this weird troll on Fumblr named Burritos690 who really likes to bother me,” says Chrissy. “That’s one thing you two have in common. Now, uh, mind if I join Estrella in sleeping?”
“Oh, sure, I’ll just bother the males,” says Nic. “Adios!”
Chrissy walks over to Estrella and lies on the ground. “He irritates me,” she whispers. She looks at Estrella, who’s sound asleep.
After a while, Estrella suddenly gets up and screams, “NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” She then drops back onto the ground and continues to sleep.
Chrissy says in the confessional, “Yeah. Estrella. She’s weird, all right. But she’s the closest thing to a friend I can get on this team. I’ll take whatever I can get, and then I’ll just find Julia at the merge or something.”
“Hey, Veronica,” yells Layla. “My lips are feeling reeeally crusty. Mind, like, getting me some lip gloss or whatever? I cannot go around looking like this.”
“Layla, can we do this tomorrow?” says Veronica groggily. “These challenges have taken a lot out of me... I just wanna rest for a little bit.”
“NO!” yells Layla. “Do it. Now. Seriously, Veronica, you sass me way too much, you’re worse than Charles.”
Layla says in the confessional, “DO YOU SEE THESE LIPS. They are as dry as the freaking desert. This is a really, really big deal, and that girl is working my last nerve. Ugh.”
The scene changes to the next morning, where the Hopalong Ralphcakes are chilling out (kinda) in their cabin.
Wolfgang is sleeping on the couch and snoring. Puck slowly creeps up behind him, and starts talking. “Hey. Wolfie! Guess what? Dude, you there?”
Wolfgang continues to snore. Out of nowhere, Puck pulls out a vuvuzela and blows it in Wolfgang’s face obnoxiously, causing him to sputter and wake up.
“Huh-- wha-- WHAT?!” yells Wolfgang. “What the crap was that for? Did I seriously get less than fifteen hours of sleep, AGAIN?”
“Dude, I found out something cool!” says Puck happily. “You gotta come over here.”
“No. It’s not going to be cool. It’s going to be some pointless crap that will be a waste of my life. You know, I’ll never get these twenty seconds back,” complains Wolfgang.
“Aww, come on, man! You’ll like this show that Chels is watching! She wants you to come in, too,” says Puck.
Wolfgang reluctantly gets up from the couch and follows him to the other room, where Chelsey is sitting on the couch watching television, while Flora is sitting next to her and Arthur is on the ground snoring loudly.
“Puck, get out of here, this is a one-on-one thing,” snaps Chelsey. Puck trots away.
“Urgh, what do you want now?” Wolfgang says. “I already tried taking those pills you wanted me to take, they tasted like horrible crap. I’m done with that stuff.”
“No. See this show I’m watching? Well, I figured you’d like it. It’s called--” Chelsey begins.
“Dude, it’s called Teen Wolf and it’s totally up your alley! They even named the show after you! If that isn’t chill, man, I dunno what is!” says Puck giddily, reappearing next to them.
“That is NOT the point, Puck. Go away. What I want to show Wolfgang is the main character’s hair. Look at how perfectly combed it is. This guy is perfect. He has literally no flaws. Second hottest guy I’ve ever seen,” Chelsey says.
“I am assuming the first is Toad, right?” giggles Arthur, waking up. Chelsey glares at him, and he resumes sleeping.
“You think I can get my hair to look like that?” growls Wolfgang. “I don’t think I’ve ever brushed it in my entire life. Good luck.”
“Well, if you do it, then it won’t look like a rat’s nest as much... Look, Wolfgang, I just want to make you more physically appealing,” Chelsey says.
Wolfgang groans, and walks away. “...Or you could do that,” yells Chelsey.
“Chelsey, have you ever tried being nice to people?” asks Flora sweetly.
“Nice? What do you mean? Of course I’m nice. You just, like, get offended at everything. Seriously, gurl. Don’t be so touchy,” says Chelsey.
“Well, you’re nicer than Elena, so that’s a plus. But you don’t have a personality or anything outside of wanting to be popular,” Flora says. “I bet you could be really nice.”
“Aww, Flora, that’s really sweet of you... Wait. Who are you to tell me about not having a personality?!” Chelsey pipes up.
Trey, Julia, and Helga are shown sitting in chairs. “Trey, you’re a useless lump,” says Julia rudely.
“Believe me, I’m used to it...” says Trey. “I was gonna tell you that you’re pretty now that you don’t have red hair, but since you don’t like me...”
“I don’t know why you seem to forget that you were a gigantic douchenugget in your first season,” Helga says while reading a book called The Advantages Of Being A Floorplant.
“Dude, I’m a changed man...” says Trey solemnly. “I’m different...”
“Shaddap, Trey,” says Julia rudely. “Why did you want to steal my moolah, then? Only true douchenuggets do that.”
“It was a compulsive thing, man... Aww, whatever, I’m out of here... Nobody likes me anyway, so it doesn’t make a difference...” whispers Trey, and he crawls away.
Trey walks into the bathroom, but sees Elena already in there just sitting on the floor, reading a magazine. “Eww! WTF, Trey? I was having some private time!”
“Elena. Listen. They’re being huge jerks out there. They think that just because I did some kinda bad stuff, they have the right to belittle me constantly,” says Trey sadly.
“Whoa, what? You’re not all mopey and stuff,” Elena says warily. “Something is up.”
“Yeah. Being here has made me less depressed, and more just like I want to destroy these people,” says Trey.
Elena looks at Trey for a moment, and he then looks at her. She then says, “Wanna make out?”
Trey nods his head, and the two begin to violently kiss each other. After a couple seconds, Elena lets go. “Now, I have to actually go to the bathroom,” she says. He looks at her for a second. She yells, “LEAVE.”
Elena says in the confessional, “Oh, there is no way I’m getting back together with that bum. I’m not that type of girl. But hey, I’ll do anything if it gets me more screentime!”
Once she’s done, Elena stomps out of the bathroom and walks up to Puck, who’s standing by the microwave and eating ramen noodles. She grabs Puck’s noodles, eats them, then throws the empty bowl back into his hands.
“Aww, dude, those were my noodles, what gives?” says Puck disappointedly.
Elena sits on the couch in a huff. “Wow, someone’s grumpier than usual today,” Chelsey says.
“Chelsey. I’m going to go back to hating you in about two minutes, but what do you look for in a guy?” Elena asks randomly.
“Anything but skinny jeans and goth clothing, pretty much,” says Chelsey. Wolfgang makes a snorting noise in the background.
“Well, Chelsey, you will be happy to find out that I do not fit either of those descriptions,” says Arthur randomly.
“Thanks, gurl! Luckily Trey doesn’t either! Bye!” Elena says cheerily, and she leaves.
“...What’s her deal?” asks Flora, after Elena has left.
Roz is seen with Chef Hatchet and Gary, sitting in what looks like the control room. “Guys. This is really, really weird. I got this anonymous note, read it, and it has some pretty freaky chaz in there.”
“A love letter? Heh-heh. Spicy,” chuckles Chef quietly.
“Man, I wish I could have gotten one of those!” says Gary excitedly. “From Meg, obviously. But why did you even call me here?”
“Do ya got any ideas for a challenge?” Roz says. “If not, we’ll do some whodunit thing to see who sent this note to me, and the person who sent it wins immunity for their team.”
“Roz, you’re a really spontaneous and random host...” says Gary. “But I can’t complain! I’ll get the contestants and bring them here pronto.”
The contestants are shown in front of Roz, near a small building in the tourist-y little town. “So, guys. This morning I got a weird love note of some sort. One by one, my buddies are gonna ask ya questions to find out who’s done it, while I go and get my nails done! Bye!” Roz waves, and zips away.
“That girl has some serious issues,” Chelsey scoffs. “...She does know that cool people get manicures after 5:00 PM, right? Otherwise the weather will cause your nails to be all sticky and gross. I do not want that to happen.”
“GRAH-BLARGLE!” A noise is heard, and Smoothie Guy walks out from next to Chef. “What’s up, noodles-in-cups? I’m going to be interrogating the girls, while Chef will interrogate the boys. This will be fun, fun, fun.”
“Girls sending love letters to Roz? Ewww, nobody here is like that,” Elena says rudely.
“Wait, so, is this our challenge or something? You guys are getting lazier and lazier,” Layla says while flipping her hair. “Veronica, can you be interrogated instead of me, BTW?”
“Yes. Now, follow me into the room... We’ve got some work to do,” Chef says in a quiet voice, and then laughs evilly. “Wolfgang? You’re up first.”
Wolfgang mopes into the room, which is dimly lit with nothing but a table, a chair on either side of it, and a lamp. They both sit down, and Chef takes out the note.
“DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT WRITE THIS NOTE?” yells Chef. “I WANT HONEST ANSWERS, AND HONEST ANSWERS ONLY. NOW DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT WRITE THIS NOTE?! ANSWER ME, BOY!”
“No!” yells Wolfgang. “I don’t like people. Why would I write a letter to Roz? Her squealing frequently punctures my eardrums.”
“YOU’RE LYIN’, BOY! I SEE YO’ FACE IS RED!” yells Chef.
“MY FACE IS ALWAYS RED!” yells Wolfgang back. “GET OUT OF IT!”
“All righ’, all righ’,” says Chef. “You scare me. Get out. NEXT!” He pushes Wolfgang out from the room, and slams the door.
Meanwhile, Smoothie Guy is in the room with Elena. “Hey. Uh. Elena. Not gonna lie, you’re super attractive. You’re a rude jerk. I’m a rude jerk. We could go perfectly together. Plus, your boobs are huge,” Smoothie Guy winks.
“Hey. I worked hard to get the girls,” Elena says, feeling angered. “I’m not interested in you. I got many more hotties to look for, and your hair makes you look like a girl.”
“But I have a nice, scraggly beard, right?” Smoothie Guy says. “My mom says it gives me this outdoorsy, wilderness survivor-like feel.”
“Smoothie Guy, aren’t you like thirty? I’m not gonna date you,” Elena says, getting more angry.
“Twenty-nine,” scoffs Smoothie Guy. “Also, this conversation doesn’t leave us, okay?”
While Smoothie Guy is talking, Elena seems to be texting on her phone. “HEY! IF YOU’RE TALKING TO YOUR FRIENDS, I’LL--” yells Smoothie Guy.
“Calm down, turd!” yells Elena. “Obviously you’re not gonna interrogate me, so I’m gonna leave.” She walks out of the door and goes back to the other contestants.
Arthur is shown playing with a cube-shaped object. “Yo, man, what’s that?” Puck says happily. “Totes wanna play with it!”
“It’s a Pubik’s Cube,” Arthur explains. “My mother made it for me. Different word on each square, and it can be combined to make enlightening phrases. Hmm, let’s see... If you wake up in the morning while--”
“While being named Arthur, you’re gonna get CONKED IN THE NOGGIN,” Julia yells.
“Heh-heh-heh,” says Chef, grinning evilly from the doorway. “Next victim-- I mean, interrogatee. Trey, come on in here.”
“Why... I’m really not looking for a relationship right now, can’t you just skip me...” says Trey. “I didn’t write the note...”
“No! GET YO’ FILTHY ASS IN HERE UNLESS YOU WANNA EAT MAH GRUEL FOR THE REST OF THE GAME!” yells Chef.
Trey says in the confessional, “Ugh. Chef scares me. I’ll add him to the list of ‘People I Want To Destroy.'”
Trey mopes into the room, and Chef locks the door. “Greetings,” says Chef evilly. “So. Dude. You’re evil, righ’? Why should I believe you that y’ didn’t write th’ note?”
“Because, man, I’m not evil anymore...” says Trey. “You gotta understand that sometimes people do things that are wrong, but they aren’t wrong themselves...”
Chef scratches his head. “Come t’ think of it, I can barely remember anything evil you’ve eva’ done. Strange. But still, you’re too pale. You’re up to somethin’!”
“Listen. Chef. I’m NOT evil. I voted out people in a game about voting out people. And everyone out there treats me like @#$%. So, just leave me alone and let me get back to moping about my pathetic life,” Trey says, raising his voice.
“Um... All righ’, all righ’. Only ‘cause I have a weak heart,” Chef begins to tear up. He opens the door, and yells “NEXT!”
Smoothie Guy is shown talking to Estrella. “So, Estrella. Tell me what you were doing yesterday at 4:30, right when Roz got this note.”
“Sleeping,” says Estrella flatly.
“All right... Uh...” Smoothie Guy takes out some note cards. “Does your handwriting look anything like this?” He shows Estrella the note.
“Yeah. I totally have bubbly, girlish handwriting,” Estrella says. “Was this written by a chick?”
“WHY WOULD I KNOW?! THAT’S WHY I’M INTERROGATING EVERY SINGLE FREAKING ONE OF YOU BEFORE--” Smoothie Guy yells.
Estrella walks out of the room while Smoothie Guy is berating her. “Sorry, you forgot to close the door.”
Flora walks into Smoothie Guy’s room. “Hello, Smoothie Guy! Nice weather we’re having, isn’t it?”
“How do you do it?” Smoothie Guy says, wrinkling his brow.
“What?” asks Flora. “I’m confused.”
“How are you so goddamn happy all the time?” Smoothie Guy says, then lets out a deep sigh.
“I just like life, and living it, and lots of the people in it,” says Flora happily. “Even when people are rude to me, I try to be nice to them. But what does this have to do with the note?”
“It doesn’t. But I got a crappy life, man. I need happiness. Those weird pills I took didn’t do anything to help me, just gave me extra amounts of gas,” Smoothie Guy explains.
"Oh," says Flora, and a long period of silence occurs.
“Yeah. I think you’re too innocent to write the note. Get out of here,” snarls Smoothie Guy.
As Flora walks out, Chelsey goes up to her. “Were you all mean to him? OMG, gurl. That could totally bring in the ratings! Were you independent and strong and whatever?”
“Uhh... no,” Flora says. “I was just my normal self.”
“What. The. Actual. Crap. Flora, we need to take lessons on improving popularity and appearance. You know, you need both, you can’t just have one,” Chelsey says. “I’ve told you this a billion times, but the clothes need fixing up...” She starts to jot down more notes.
Chef is shown talking with Arthur. “You’re fat, dude! Y’ need to work out!”
“Not fat. Morbidly obeeeese. Plus, I cannot work out,” says Arthur. “I am way too cool for the gym. I do not want to go to a place with a douche population of over eight thousand.”
“So, are you sure you didn’t write th’ note? Seems like something you would do while prankin’ or whatever,” Chef says.
“Uh... Nope. Didn’t write the note, not at all,” says Arthur, beginning to sweat.
“YOU LIE!” yells Chef. “I’ll put you on my naughty list. Then we can have a chat, later, when everyone is done... Heh-heh-heh.”
Arthur waddles out of the room, and Chef calls to Puck. “PUCK, GET YO’ ICY BUTT IN HERE!”
“Hey! What’s up?” says Puck cheerfully. “Now, obviously I wouldn’t write a note to Roz. I’m dating Casey, who’s way too hot ‘n’ chill for me to cheat on!”
“Yeah. But you could be playin’ around and trying to be all mysterious an’ stuff,” says Chef.
“Whaaaaaaaaat?” Puck says. “Nope. Sorry to burst your bubble, Chef, but I didn’t do it. Wolfie wouldn’t like that!”
“‘Ey! Did Wolfgang write the note? I DEMAND ANSWERS!” yells Chef.
“What are you talkin’ about? He’s way too nice for that! Plus, didn’t you jabber to him already?” Puck says.
“Kid, ain’t nobody ever say jabber,” Chef says. “But I suppose I’ll believe ya. Get outta here.”
Nic walks in. “Hola, Chef, I decided to talk to you.”
“Wait? Didn’t you already go, kid?” Chef says warily.
“No, no,” Nic says. “But I did not write the letter either. Believe me, Alejandro has high standards.”
“Mmm-hmm. I know th’ guy. Not a nice dude, but you on th’ other hand. You could be hidin’ somethin’!” says Chef.
“Of course not,” says Nic. “Now, I need to scoot. Adios.”
“Hmm... That was weird...” says Chef to himself, after Nic leaves.
Smoothie Guy is shown arguing with Layla. “I’m NOT gonna get you a smoothie!” he yells.
“Um, dude? Your name is Smoothie Guy. If you’re not gonna get me a smoothie, then why the crap am I even here?” Layla whines.
“Smoothie Guy is not my name! Did you really think my parents wrote that on my freaking birth certificate?!” says Smoothie Guy.
“Uh, no. But if you’re not gonna get me one, then why don’t you just change your name to ‘Picks-Fights-With-Pretty-Girls-For-No-Reason Guy?'” Layla says.
“Because my mom says it’s a cool name!” yells Smoothie Guy.
“You IRRITATE me!” yells Layla, and she stomps out.
The contestants are seen gathered around Chef and Smoothie Guy, and also Roz, who’s finally back. “Hey, guys! So, we’ve narrowed it down to two people. And both of them are on... the Hopalong Ralphcakes! So, that means you guys lost the challenge.”
“Wait, what? I thought you said that the person who sent the note would win for their team!” says Wolfgang angrily.
“Yeah. We kinda realized that that really didn’t make sense. The note was kinda creepy, and we thought that if we made you guys vote someone out, the person who wrote the note could reveal themselves! Plus, we all know that Trick woulda gone home if the Fruits lost. And we don’t like obvious eliminations,” Roz explains.
“Uh, thanks? Is that a good thing?” says Trick angrily.
“Yep. Now get outta here, guys. We got work to do,” says Roz.
The Hopalong Ralphcakes are walking back to their camp, which has been previously used by the Citrus Fruits. “Ugh. Losing sucks,” Elena says. “Just like Chelsey’s clothing.”
“Mind saying something that doesn’t cause me to feel like I’m losing brain cells?” says Helga while reading the same book she was earlier.
“Yeah. What she said. I like your sass, Helga. They call you the Queen of Sass for a reason,” says Chelsey.
“Who calls her that? I’ve literally heard nobody anywhere call her the Queen of Sass,” Julia says rudely.
“Well, I’ve heard nobody anywhere call you One Erection’s biggest fan, but you claim that in your Tweeter bio,” Helga says snidely.
“Guys, guys,” Arthur says. “Wanna hear a story? I assume so. Okay, so I was coming home on the public bus about a year ago. It was a long day at school, I had to be Puber T all day. Plus I got a detention for that one thing I said to my teacher. I swear, I was at the end of my rope, man, I was FRIED. I was basically half-asleep, so I had no idea what was going on at all. And then I saw this wrapper, and I assumed it was a lollipop, so I put it in my mouth, but little did I know, it was actually the wrapper of a tamp--”
“All right, that’s enough!” shouts Chelsey, interrupting Arthur.
Puck walks out of the house eating a corn dog. “Yo, what are we talkin’ about?”
“Tampons,” says Helga dryly.
“Ooh! Cool!” Puck squeals excitedly and runs over to the rest of the team.
Estrella walks over to the team, and Helga says, “What are you doing here? Thought you figured we weren’t cool enough to talk to.”
“No. Guys, listen. We want to give up immunity to you guys, because there is someone on our team who really just annoys all of us and we want him out,” Estrella says. “Deal?”
“...Why would we ever say no to that?” Chelsey says. “Deal. Gurl, you’re awesome. Now let’s go into the house, guys.”
The Hopalong Ralphcakes move back into the cabin, while the Swagged Out Citrus Fruits all emerge from the cabin and spread out in the grassy knoll.
“Guys, I only got fifteen hours of sleep last night,” whines Layla. “Look. The bags under my eyes have bags under the bags, and that is NOT good.”
“What do you want me to do about it this time?” sighs Veronica.
“Oh, nothing, I was just complaining so I could bother you,” says Layla evilly. “Nothing big. But while you’re at it, can you comb my hair? I encountered a knot earlier.”
Trick walks up to the two girls. “Yo, what’s up, guys?” he says. “I was getting tired of polishing my skateboard. Thought I could chill around you. By the way, why are we out here?”
“We don’t like you,” Layla says rudely.
“Hey, Layla, you could be a bit nicer about it...” pouts Veronica. “But it’s kinda true, I guess...”
“Really? Well, uh, I was gonna try and get out Nic today. He’s kinda rude and weird,” says Trick. “Probs won’t work, but hey, I can try. Thanks for the help.”
Layla says in the confessional, “Charles, if you’re watching this, I miss you sooooo much. Seriously, if you came here, I would be so happy. I hate Veronica, I hate Trick, I hate everyone on this team. I just wanna go home and force you to do things for me instea-- oh, wait, you quit. Never mind.”
Charles is shown in a gigantic mansion, watching Total Drama on a flat-screen TV while wearing a diamond-encrusted towel around his neck and sitting in a large hot tub.
“Oh, my dear Layla, I do hope she is doing well,” he says to himself. “She is known to be quite whiny when she doesn’t get her way... Which is often.”
“I’m gonna go get something to eat, see you in a sec, guys,” says Trick, and he walks away.
Trick says in the confessional, “I really like to think I’m in power on this tribe. I got Layla and Veronica with me, and Chrissy and Estrella will just do whatever. A Nic elimination should really be easy. Plus, I gotta make Cammy proud, and that’s all that matters.”
Nic walks up to Layla and Veronica, who is now brushing Layla’s hair. “Amigo. We need to vote out Trick. He is a douche.”
“Yeah, um, so are you,” Layla says. “Lay off the hair gel.”
“No, but Trick is douchier!” whines Nic. “Come on, girls, you gotta vote for me, he doesn’t even deserve to be here. He’s barely even an all-star!”
“Meh. I’ll think about it. But only if you go to the store tomorrow and get me some 6 Hour Energy, I live and breathe that stuff,” bargains Layla.
“Fine, fine,” Nic says. “I may or may not have a stash of it in my backpack, anyway. Easy pickings.”
Roz is shown at the elimination ceremony, texting. Sure enough, the Swagged Out Citrus Fruits walk up to her and sit on the stumps.
“What the clump?!” says Roz loudly. “B-b-but... You guys won immunity! Are you really... BAHAHAHAHAHA!”
“Yeah. We are. Let us vote already,” Estrella says rudely.
“I’m not even gonna ask questions, cause I wanna be respectful, but... That’s just...” Roz tries to hold in her laughter. “Go vote or whatever. I’m done.”
Estrella is shown voting in the confessional. “Trick’s a pompous douche. Nic’s a creepy scumbag. The choice is obvious tonight.”
Chrissy is shown voting, as well. “Yeah, I think I’m gonna go with this... It’s hard, really.”
The contestants finish voting, and Roz speaks up. “All righty! First seashell goes to Chrissy, I don’t even think you’ve been a target this whole time.”
She tosses Chrissy a seashell, and Chrissy catches it happily.
“Estrella and... You know, let’s just give one to everyone other than Trick ‘n’ Nic,” Roz says. She passes the rest of the girls seashells. “Heh. Trick ‘n’ Nic. That rhymes.”
“Way to make it suspenseful,” says Trick sarcastically.
“The final seashell goes to...”
“Nic. Get outta here, Patty.”
“I guess you weren’t kidding when you said I would go home if we lost. Guys, did you go to elimination just to get rid of me?” says Trick angrily.
“No,” says everyone simultaneously except Estrella, who says “yes."
“Whatever. If you guys don’t appreciate strategy and would rather focus on cartoony, over-the-top gimmicks, that’s fine. You guys can just kiss my--” begins Trick. Before he can finish, Smoothie Guy walks up to him and kicks him in the butt.
“Or kick it. That’s fine too,” says Trick rudely as he walks to the Boat of Losers. “Bye, guys.”
As the Boat of Losers pulls up, Cammy is shown to be sitting on there. Estrella makes a loud gasp from the elimination ceremony.
“Hey,” says Cammy quietly. “This is kinda disappointing.”
“Meh. They can live with it,” says Trick, sitting down next to Cammy. “They just knew I was way too cool, so they booted me out. You’re the only cool one here.”
Trick hears a snoring noise, and sees a sleeping Tolkien on the other side of him, who starts to snuggle with him. “Great...”
The Boat of Losers drives away, and Roz’s voice is heard. “Could this be a contender for Most Obvious Elimination Ever? Ah, well. We tried to make it fun. Anyway, tune in for more random crappy nonsense soon, on Total Drama: Superstar Showdown!”