Mr. Hanks' Boating School/transcript

== Transcript ==
Episode Aired: February 2, 2007
Episode Copyrighted: 2006
This episode is rated TV-Y7.
The episode begins with SpongeBob, Lincoln and Leni heading to Patrick's house where Patrick is sitting down, watching TV.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Hey Pat, whatcha doing?
Patrick Star: Oh hey SpongeBob. I'm just watching my favorite program. It's called black and white lines.
Camera reveals static on the TV.
Patrick Star: Hahahahah! That is just so funny!
Leni Loud: It's totes like a cartoon! That part is funny!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Ummm...... yeah....... so Patrick, wanna go jellyfishing with Lincoln and Leni?
Patrick Star: Sure, but one question..... *eats the jellyfish net*
Lincoln Loud: Patrick, what are you doing?
SpongeBob SquarePants: *interrupts him* No, Patrick, you cannot eat the jellyfishing net.
Patrick Star: I was gonna ask if the jellyfish were edible.
SpongeBob SquarePants: No, silly Patrick, you don't eat them, you catch them!
Patrick Star: Oh, so jellyfish is a disease? Then I'm not going!
Lincoln Loud: *gets angry* PATRICK! IT'S NOT FOOD, AN ILLNESS, OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT, IT'S JUST A SIMPLE GAME!
Patrick Star: I see. So it's food and illness...... but not a game.
Lincoln Loud: Patrick, you have to go to Mrs. Puff's Boating School to find out!
The scene cuts to Mrs. Puff's Boating School.
Mr. Hanks: Mrs. Puff.
Mrs. Puff: Mr. Hanks, thank goodness you're here.
Mr. Hanks: Mrs. Puff, do you want some chocolate candy?
Mrs. Puff: Yes, Mr. Hanks. I'll try some. *eats chocolate candy*
Mr. Hanks: How's it taste?
Mrs. Puff: It tastes good.
Mr. Hanks: *gets angry* NO EATING IN THE CLASSROOM!
Screen cuts outside of Mrs. Puff's Boating School.
Hr. Hanks: *offscreen, angry* AND STAY OUT! *kicks Mrs. Puff out of Mrs. Puff's Boating School*
Screen cuts back inside of Mrs. Puff's Boating School.
Mr. Hanks: And now, I'm gonna name the school "Mr. Hanks' Boating School."
Lincoln Loud: But Mrs. Puff teaches the students. She's the teacher.
Mr. Hanks: Not anymore. I'm the teacher now. Has he eaten a deck of cards? If so, maybe I can shuffle him back to normal!
SpongeBob SquarePants and Lincoln Loud: *with annoyed look on my face*
Mr. Hanks: Oh, did he eat some curtains? Maybe he needs to pull himself together!
SpongeBob SquarePants and Lincoln Loud: *with annoyed look on my face*
Mr. Hanks: *laughs, then sighs* Okay.... so what were you two saying?
SpongeBob SquarePants: Mr. Hanks, I'm getting worried about Patrick. It's always difficult to just have a simple conversation with him..... or do anything with him. He's just that stupid.
Mr. Hanks: Well, I guess I'll give him a test, and if he can't pass then I'll have to hire a tutor for him..... *with a frightened look on my face* .....which I do not advise.
Leni Loud: Okay...... now Patrick, you go and listen to what Mr. Hanks says!
Patrick Star: Yes sir! *salutes*
Leni Loud: Good. Now, show that test what you're made of!
Patrick Star: See ya, Leni! *leaves*
Slide transition. Later at home, it showed Lincoln in his room getting ready for bed, when he heard a knock at the door.
Lincoln Loud: Come in.
The door opens.
SpongeBob SquarePants and Leni Loud: *comes in*
Leni Loud: Hey Linky, are you getting ready for bed?
Lincoln Loud: Yeah, I am. What's up?
Leni Loud: *sits on Lincoln's bed* I wanted to come in here to thank you, Linc. Before, everyone had given up on teaching me to drive. But you still had hope for me, and tried your hardest to help me pass. If it weren't for you, no one else would've wanted to help me.
Lincoln Loud: *sits next to her* It's the least I could do, Leni. With all the great things you've done to our family, I think you at least earned something special. You might not know much, but I do know that you've got a great heart, and it's great that you've finally accomplished something special. Like they always say, even if you can't do it the first time, you should never give up on trying.
Lincoln and Leni Loud: *hugs each other*
Leni Loud: Thanks Linky. *gets up and heads towards the door* I'll see you tomorrow!
SpongeBob SquarePants: See you tomorrow, Lincoln.
Lincoln Loud: Night Leni.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Good night.
Leni leaves Lincoln's room
He turns off the light and goes to bed.
Time card reading "4:45 PM"
French Narrator: 4:45 PM.
It's 4:45 PM, and Leni is driving in the van, humming happily to a song. She arrived at the mall, and parked the van. After turning the van off, she hopped outside the van, when her friends suddenly arrived.
Friend #1: Hey Leni!
Friend #2: We heard about your driver's license!
Leni Loud: I know, right? I'm like, super thrilled to have one. Now I don't have to ask Lori to drive me to places anymore!
Friend #1: You know, I didn't think you'd be able to do it.
Friend #2: *elbows her*
Friend #1: But we still had hope for you!
Leni Loud: Thanks guys!
Friend #2: Okay girls, who's ready for a shopping spree?!
All the girls squeal with excitement. After about two hours of shopping, the girls came out the Mall, noticing that it was starting to get dark.
Leni Loud: That was like, lots of fun!
Friend #1: I know, everything was so cheap today!
Friend #2: And that's why the Mall is the best place ever! *yawns* I'm getting kinda tired though.
Friend #1: Yeah, I think we should all be heading back to our place for dinner.
Leni Loud: *checks my watch* Oh! It's 6:44 PM? Is that a word?
Friend #2: *sighs* It's 6:44pm, Leni.
Leni Loud: I still don't get it. Well, I'll see you guys soon!
Friend #1: Bye Leni!
Friend #2: Bye!
The two friends walk away.
Leni Loud: *unlocks the van with her key, and gets into the van, turns it on, and begins to drive out of the car park* Hmm, it's a bit harder to see.
As she continues to drive, Leni was about to turn the van left, but a motorbike speeds right past her from the right, making her gasp in horror and stop the van.
Leni Loud: *pants* OMGosh! I didn't see that bike coming!
Cars behind her started to toot their horns.
Car Driver: Hey! What's going on?! Let's go!
Leni Loud: S-Sorry! *drives off again*
On the left side of the road, another car accidentally bumps into the van.
Leni Loud: *screams* What was that?! *looks in my mirror to see a drunk driver driving off into the distance, then pants* Just be calm... You're almost home.
Due to the hard view, Leni is unable to see anything further away from her. As she keeps driving, she suddenly sees a drunk person on the road. She screams, and quickly tries to swerve around the person, but this causes the van to spin out and almost roll off the ground. Thankfully, it manages to stop perfectly on the grass, but Leni was shaking with fear.
Leni Loud: I-I-I didn't know about any of t-t-this!
Leni then saw that the Loud House was just around the corner. She slowly drives the van around the corner, and parks it in the driveway. After she turns off the van, she gets out the van, and slowly walks towards the house. Once she walks inside, she sees the older siblings eating their dinner at the grownup table.
Luna Loud: Leni! You're back!
Lori Loud: How was your first day out?
Leni Loud: *tries not to shake* Uhh, it was great!
Rita Loud: That's great, sweetie. Now come eat your dinner, it's getting cold.
Leni Loud: *sits down on her chair, and slowly starts eating my dinner, in my head* If I told them what happened, they might not let me drive again! But I don't want to drive at night anymore! That was too scary! I wonder what Patrick is doing tomorrow!
Time card reading "The Next Morning"
French Narrator: The next morning.
Patrick is taken to a room with a chair and table and a test paper.
Patrick Star: *sits down*
The timer starts.
Patrick Star: Huh? These questions look easy! I can't believe he gave me a paper that even a baby could do! How pathetic!
Time card reading "One Hour Later..."
French Narrator: 1 hour later.
Patrick Star: Done. *shocked* Huh?
Mr. Hanks: *angrily* Thanks a lot, Patrick. Being dumb are the wrong answers. You got a bad grade and it's your fault as well.
Patrick Star: But I got 12/100!? That's a load of barnacles! How can I, the smartest starfish in the world, get low marks on a test so simple!?
Mr. Hanks: *angrily* Of course, the test is so simple! I'm very disappointed in you!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Wait! Mr. Hanks, how if I get the answers wrong?
Mr. Hanks: No, you didn't SpongeBob! Come in!
SpongeBob walks in and sits down.
Mr. Hanks: Okay, according to the test results, he is very stupid. He got 4/10 in the English section, 3/10 in the math section and 1/10 in the science section. On the bright side, he got 10/10 in the culinary section! He ain't going anywhere until he gets all the answers correct!
Lincoln Loud: Figures.
Patrick Star: *gnaws on SpongeBob's arm*
Mr. Hanks: Patrick will be given another test in a week. Now go home and prepare him for the test. Otherwise I will have to hire a tutor. *in frightened voice* Which I do not advise.
Lincoln Loud: Understood.
Slide transition cuts to Patrick's Rock.
Yellow Rectangle: Okay, Patrick, we are going to teach you the basics of math, English and science. Understand?
Patrick Star: Ohhh, why does education have to be like a chore?!
Yellow Rectangle: Patrick, it's for the best. I don't want you to end up with *in frightened voice* a tutor!
Patrick Star: *worried, and nervously* Okay!
Red Rectangle: Good Patrick!
Yellow Rectangle: Let's start with math, in that case. Patrick, if I had one cookie *holds a cookie in left hand*, and then I found another *holds a cookie in right hand*, how many would I have together?
Patrick Star: None. *eats the two cookies*
Yellow Rectangle: Noo. I would have... *notices that the cookies have been eaten by Patrick* Oh, um, never mind. Let's try that again. If I had one cookie and got another cookie then how many would I have all together? *places down two cookies*
Patrick Star: Still nothing. *eats the cookies*
SpongeBob SquarePants: *gets irritated* Oh Neptune, how long will this take!? I mean..... Let's try something else.
Yellow Rectangle: *holds up a piece of paper, with an 8 written on it* What is the name of this number?
Patrick Star: Two sideways eyeballs?
Yellow Rectangle: Eyeballs are not a number, Patrick.
Patrick Star: Okay. *waits five seconds* Is it a number now?
Yellow Rectangle: Um..... why don't we just move on to English?
Patrick Star: *sits down*
Yellow Rectangle: SpongeBob?
SpongeBob SquarePants: Okay, Yellow. *takes a piece of chalk out of his pocket and draws an "I" on the chalkboard* Now what do we see here?
Patrick Star: A line!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Nooooo..... let's try a different letter. *draws a C*
Patrick Star: Wait, a C!
Lincoln Loud: *draws an A*
Yellow Rectangle: What's an A?
Red Rectangle: Atari! It was launched since 1972!
SpongeBob SquarePants: No! Now what do we see here? *draws a B*
Leni Loud: Ummmmm..... I got it! I got it!
SpongeBob SquarePants and Lincoln Loud: *smiles*
Leni Loud: It's a butterfly!
Patrick Star: Yeah, it is a butterfly!
SpongeBob and Lincoln's head explodes. A guy walks by and spots him.
Robloxian Man: Excuse me sir, but I couldn't help noticing that your student here is having a bit of trouble learning.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, he isn't a student. He's my best friend. He took a test from the doctor, and got a low grade. Now he has been given another test that he'll do next week. If he fails this one he will have to have a *in frightened voice* tutor! And Patrick is very dumb.
Robloxian Man: Well, let me help you, kind sir. Sorry I forgot to introduce myself. I am Mr. Fishinson of Deep Sea Junior High. I moved in here a few months ago and I teach math. Once I taught some English and science, too. I can help train your starfish friend to stay away from having to be *in frightened voice* tutored.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Okay, Robloxian.
Robloxian Man: I'll have him ready for that test in a week! Now go home..... I'll have this guy a genius by the time you come back!
Later, while everyone was getting ready for bed, Lincoln was heading towards the bathroom to brush his teeth, when he saw Leni on her bed, who seemed to be shaking in fear. Screen cuts to SpongeBob's house, Lincoln headed into SpongeBob's house see them.
Lincoln Loud: Leni? What's wrong?
Leni Loud: N-Nothing!
Lincoln Loud: Nothing? You're shaking. Are you cold?
Leni Loud: N-No!
Lincoln Loud: Then what's the matter?
SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm... Uhh, hey shouldn't you be getting ready for bed?
Lincoln Loud: Guys, stop!
Leni Loud: Okay, fine! I'm frightened!
Lincoln Loud: Of what?
SpongeBob SquarePants: Remember last night when I came home from the mall? Well, the drive home was really scary! Some people almost ran into the van, some people were acting weird on the road, and to top it off, I could barely see anything on the road! It was like, really scary!
Lincoln Loud: Wait, you couldn't see anything?
SpongeBob SquarePants: Yeah?
Lincoln Loud: But, why didn't you have the headlights on?
Leni Loud: I have light bulbs on my head?
Lincoln Loud: No! I meant for the car! There should've been some kind of switch where you could turn the headlights on! Then you could've seen a lot easier at night!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Why didn't you tell Leni that?!
Lincoln Loud: I thought the driving instructor would've told you!
Leni Loud: He didn't! In fact, no one did! It was only a driving test!
Lincoln Loud: I thought YOU would've known about the headlights! You see Mom and Dad use it all the time! Did you somehow, I don't know, forget about it?!
Leni Loud: Hey! Learning how to drive is stressful!
Lincoln Loud: Come on! Driving can't be that stressful!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Teaching Patrick is stressful!
Suddenly, SpongeBob and Leni stood up from her bed, and looked down at Lincoln, looking angry.
Leni Loud: Look Lincoln! Driving a van in real life is something I bet you haven't even fully experienced! And no, playing your video game doesn't count! I saw some nasty things happen to me, and I won't forget it! I put up with people who were bad drivers, people that were walking and talking weird, and cars I can barely see because the headlights weren't on in the first place! You made it seem like driving was easy! But judging by how many times I failed, and what I just witnessed, made me realize it wasn't so easy! *voice breaks* And now, I feel so traumatized! *leaves*
SpongeBob SquarePants: Lincoln, how could you!
Lincoln Loud: I'm sorry! I only wanted to help you, because I thought teaching you how to drive would help you prove you can do more than you think!
SpongeBob SquarePants: You don't mean that! You just wanted me to drive so you would get out of doing a test for Patrick!
Lincoln looked scared. He had never seen SpongeBob this frightened or angry in his life. He could understand why she was feeling this way. Soon, SpongeBob escorts Lincoln outside his house, and closes the door. After, Lincoln hears him crying from the other side.
Lincoln Loud: SpongeBob! Please forgive me!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Go away, Lincoln! I'm not in the mood!
Lincoln looked down, feeling bad for SpongeBob. Screen cuts to the Loud House, he then headed into his room and shut the door behind him. Screen cuts back to SpongeBob's house in his room, SpongeBob was lying on his bed, crying, and looking awfully frightened.
Slide transition cuts to Mr. Hanks' Boating School.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick, remember everything Fishinson taught you! Now go out there and nail that test, Pat.... *notices Patrick is sleeping* Oh barnacles!
Patrick Star: *walks into the room*
He did a week ago, with the chair, seat, and a new test. He sits on the chair.
Patrick Star: Wow, this looks too easy to be true! *fills in the answers very quickly* NAILED IT!
Time card reading "Later..."
French Narrator: Later.
Mr. Hanks: You did it, Patrick.
Patrick Star: You mean I......
Mr. Hanks: Yes.
SpongeBob SquarePants: *walks in through the door*
Patrick Star: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Great job Patrick!
Yellow Rectangle: You did it!
Patrick Star: Yeah, I beat the test!
Slide transition cuts to the outside of Mr. Hanks' Boating School.
Patrick Star: I can't believe I passed the test!
SpongeBob SquarePants: I know right!? I'm so happy for you!
Screen cuts to Mr. Hanks' Boating School.
Mr. Hanks: Ooops, wait, he didn't get 90%.... he got 9%! GUARDS, GET HIM!
Mr. Hanks' Guards: *offscreen* Okay!
Slide transition cuts to Conch Street, where Patrick is sitting on his rock, when suddenly a tutor appears out of nowhere next to him.
Mr. Hanks' Guard #1: It's time for your first lesson, Patty!
Mr. Hanks' Guard #2: Let's learn about counting! What comes after 1, Patty?
Patrick Star: *hits tutor on the head with a frying pan*
Mr. Hanks' Guard #1: He's quite a fighter, isn't he?
Mr. Hanks' Guard #2: Yeah. It hurts so bad.
Mr. Hanks' Guards: *collapses onto stretcher and gets taken to an ambulance*
Mr. Hanks: I'll finish you, Patrick once and for all.
Mrs. Puff: *offscreen, angrily* Not so fast, Mr. Hanks.
Mr. Hanks: Huh?
Mrs. Puff: *angrily* I'm the teacher. *kidnaps Mr. Hanks with a fabric bag*
Mr. Hanks: *offscreen inside a fabric bag* Hey, what do you think you're doing? Put me down.
Mrs. Puff: *angrily* Goodbye Mr. Hanks. *throws Mr. Hanks inside a fabric bag*
Mr. Hanks: *offscreen inside a fabric bag, angrily* You'll regret this, Patrick! Someday!
After a while, Leni is getting ready for bed, but she then looks down the hallway at Lincoln's room. She slowly heads towards his room, and quietly knocks on the door.
Leni Loud: Lincoln? *slowly opens the door, and sees Lincoln on his bed, crying into his hands.
She sits next to him.
Leni Loud: Are you okay?
Lincoln Loud: *sniffs* I'm so sorry, Leni! If I never gave you the courage to keep on practicing to drive, we wouldn't have gotten into this situation, and you wouldn't have to be scared of-!
Leni Loud: *shushes him*
She wraps him in a gentle hug.
Leni Loud: No Lincoln, I'm sorry for what happened last night. I was being too stupid to realize what I said to you was harsh. What I said wasn't true. I realized that you're just eleven years old, and that's probably why you didn't quite understand everything about driving. It seemed so cruel of me to take the blame on you for something you didn't mean to do... But I just hope you realize, no matter what happens, I will be there to care for you. I have a good heart, like you said so. *smiles*
Lincoln Loud: *begins to brighten up, and continues to hug Leni* Thanks, Leni.
Leni Loud: *gives Lincoln a kiss on the cheek*
She gets up and heads towards the door.
Lincoln Loud: I love you, Leni.
Leni Loud: I love you too, Linky. *leaves Lincoln's room*
As he gets his pajamas on and gets ready for bed.
Leni Loud: *to the viewer* Well, I learned an important lesson today. My secret almost resulted in my brother getting hurt, but I managed to conquer my fears and realize everything I did was really stupid. And now, my family is back to normal, and, in three weeks, I'd like, be able to drive myself to the mall again! *giggles, then heads back into my room, and closes the door*
Screen fades in black and it says "THE END". Episode ends.
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