From Here To Eterna

is the third episode of Pokémon Clueless Edition. It was written by and first aired in June 2017.
==Synopsis==
The trio arrive in Eterna City and find themselves caught up in a Team Galactic situation again. While Generic, Satomi and Ledio try and drive the team out of the city, they come across a significant person in the Sinnoh region.
==Transcript==
Satomi is seen skipping out of a forest.
:Satomi: That was so fun!
Ledio is seen walking out, carrying Generic.
:Ledio: Maybe for you. You didn't have to carry an 6'7" 18-year-old man who shrieked like Wilhelm when he saw a Gastly.
:Generic: It caught me off guard, okay?!
:Ledio: Come on man, just admit your scared of ghosts.
:Generic: No, cause I'm not.
Satomi gets a picture of Casper up and shows it to Generic as he jumps out of Ledio's arms and runs off. Satomi and Ledio giggle.
:Satomi: And he's a year older than me.
:Ledio: Imagine how he's gonna react to Rotom.
Satomi smirks as they see Generic is running towards Eterna City. They quickly follow as they arrive in the city. Generic bumps into a woman as Satomi and Ledio screech to a halt before they make the same mistake.
:Woman: Hey!
The woman turns around as Satomi and Ledio instantly recognise her.
:Ledio: Cynthia?
Cynthia takes her focus on Generic and looks at the two.
:Cynthia: How do you know my name?
:Ledio: Well, with you being Sinnoh champion and all that shit it's kinda hard not to.
:Cynthia: ...Fair enough.
Generic gets up and recollects himself and looks at Cynthia.
:Generic: ...Damn.
Ledio pulls Generic back.
:Ledio: Don't even think about trying to bang her.
:Generic: Aw.
Cynthia looks at Ledio, confused.
:Cynthia: How can you talk?
:Ledio: I don't know. I just started talking when I came into existence. I'm not the only one who can talk anyway, look at that one Meowth.
:Satomi: That Team Rocket doesn't exist here, does it?
:Ledio: They do. They died when they blasted off one time.
:Satomi: ...That's a bit dark.
:Ledio: Yeah but you can only survive so long without oxygen.
Cynthia silences the two.
:Cynthia: Anyway, there's a Galactic hideout over there.
Cynthia points to a building with a massive "G" on it.
:Generic: That's less a hideout than it is a huge fucking giveaway.
Cynthia raises her eyebrows.
:Ledio: I presume you want us to help you.
Cynthia nods.
:Ledio: Right. We just need the Gym Badge then we'll take 'em out.
:Cynthia: Okay.
The trio then walk off to the Gym.
----
Satomi is shown walking out of the Eterna Gym, now holding a new Gym Badge.
:Satomi: That was shockingly easy.
Satomi looks to see Generic and Ledio aren't there.
:Satomi: I'm getting deja vu and I don't know why.
The camera then shows inside the Gym, where Generic is seen doing pull-ups on the support beams. Gardenia looks up, worried.
:Gardenia: You know they can snap, right?
:Generic: Huh?
:Gardenia: They're wood, not steel.
:Generic: Oh. Ledio!
Ledio flies up as Satomi walks back in, noticing Generic.
:Satomi: Goddammit Generic!
Generic is startled as he lets go of the beam. Ledio catches him.
:Satomi: For the last time, these gyms are not built for humans!
:Generic: Well why do they call them fucking gyms?!
Satomi shakes her head.
:Gardenia: I don't understand.
:Satomi: I went to take on Roark yesterday and he managed to do the exact same thing in his gym.
:Gardenia: You've beaten him already?
Satomi nods.
:Gardenia: Huh. I should be more surprised than I am but Roark's crap at Pokémon battling.
:Satomi: Hmm. Well, anyway. Nice to meet you.
Satomi, Generic and Ledio walk out of the gym as they run into Cynthia again.
:Satomi: Oh, hi.
:Cynthia: Hey. So, you guys ready to help with the Galactic building?
:Satomi: Yes, ma'am.
:Cynthia: Right. First off, you'll need this.
Cynthia passes a disc to Satomi which reads "HM01".
:Satomi: Oh, sweet! Cut!
:Generic: I could break those trees easily.
Cynthia looks at Generic.
:Cynthia: Anyway. I'm worried about what they could be doing in there. Could you go check it out?
:Satomi: Sure, ma'am! We'd be pleasured to!
Cynthia nods as they set off to the Galactic building.
:Cynthia: (muttering) Bunch of fucking weirdos.
----
Generic is seen kicking a tree over as he, Satomi and Ledio enter the Team Galactic building.
:Generic: You'd think a high profile gang would have better security than a couple of flimsy trees, wouldn't you?
:Ledio: I think it's been established that most of this world doesn't have a clue about what security is.
:Generic: Good point.
A grunt approaches Generic. Generic notices as he punches the grunt full force, breaking his nose.
:Grunt: Augh! What the hell?!
:Satomi: Uh, Generic, I think you just punched Looker in the nose.
The grunt pulls his hair off as Satomi is proven right.
:Generic: Ah shit.
Looker's face is shown to be all swollen up.
:Ledio: What happened to your face?
:Looker: The bees. That I presume you let loose.
:Ledio: Oh yeah. That.
There is a beat.
:Ledio: So how's the wife?
:Looker: I don't have a wife.
:Ledio: Right.
Ledio grabs Generic and Satomi and runs off, barreling through a line of grunts. Looker frowns as the grunts notice Looker isn't one of them. Looker gulps as Ledio, Generic and Satomi are shown on the next door, where they hear screaming.
:Satomi: I think the grunts caught Looker.
:Generic: Good.
Satomi glares at Generic as Ledio pulls out a newspaper with a headline which reads "Diamond Dust Falling in Snowpoint City Turns Out To Be Actual Diamonds, Nearly Takes Out Resident's Eye".
:Generic: This world's got some bizarre shit going on in it.
:Ledio: Yeah, but at the end of the day I'm sure your world's weird too. You said it's like the Pokémon are humans.
:Generic: Fair enough.
Satomi keeps alert as they hear a clatter. A grunt comes out of the blue as he catches the trio off guard. Satomi puts her hands out as the grunt is pushed against the wall. Generic and Ledio look at Satomi.
:Generic: What the fuck?
Satomi looks at her hands, stunned.
:Ledio: That's gotta be a coincidence... right?
:Satomi: I-I hope so.
Satomi takes her hoodie off. She then puts it on the floor. It then rises as Satomi's eyes go wide.
:Ledio: Were you not aware of these powers?
:Satomi: No. Never.
Satomi's hoodie then drops as they look at each other. A Kadabra then appears behind them and they look at it.
:Satomi: ...Oh thank god.
The Kadabra waves.
:Generic: Does this thing have telekinesis or something?
:Satomi: Yeah.
:Ledio: All Psychic Pokémon have telekinesis.
:Generic: Huh.
:Satomi: I would've flipped if I had telekinesis.
:Generic: Understandable. So, do we let this guy join the team?
Satomi looks at the Kadabra which grabs her telekinetically and hugs her.
:Satomi: Yeah.
The other two smirk as they carry on through the building.
----
Lucas and Dawn are seen arriving in Eterna City, as they notice the Galactic building almost instantly.
:Dawn: Ah, feckin' hell! They're still a bloody thing?!
:Lucas: You sounded so Irish then that it hurts.
:Dawn: I am Irish, ya eejit!
:Lucas: Even more Irish than usual, then.
:Dawn: Yeah, yeah, yeah. But still, I swear these bastards were gone!
:Lucas: You saw the guys in Floaroma!
:Dawn: I passed out with that bottle of wine!
:Lucas: What wine?
:Dawn: The wine I made when we were in Snowpoint.
:Lucas: Huh.
Dawn ruffles her hair about. The two then see Cynthia.
:Lucas: Yo, Cynthia!
Cynthia notices them.
:Cynthia: Do I know you two?
:Dawn: Dawn Ó Muircheartach and Lucas Jackson.
Cynthia thinks about the two names.
:Cynthia: Oh! You guys!
:Lucas: Have you seen a couple of guys? One of them's a colossus, one of them's about 5 feet tall, one of them's a Ledian...
:Cynthia: Oh yeah. Those guys. The weirdos.
:Lucas: Uh... yeah, them.
:Cynthia: They're in the Galactic building.
Lucas nods as he and Dawn go to the building. Before entering, they see a bloodied and battered Looker.
:Dawn: Sweet feckin' Christ, what happened to you?!
:Looker: I stupidly gave up my cover for a split second and the next thing I knew I was being beaten up.
:Lucas: Hey, we warned you about that when you were trying to talk to us all those years ago.
:Looker: I was much smarter back then.
:Lucas: I'm sure you were.
:Looker: What're you even doing back here?
Lucas and Dawn shrug.
:Dawn: Why not? Better than sitting around in Alola with nothing to do.
Looker looks at the two.
:Looker: I'd much rather be there than here.
:Dawn: Oh, shut up.
Dawn throws Looker into a tree as the two go into the building.
----
Generic is seen sleeping as Satomi and Ledio are seen looking over him.
:Ledio: Yo, Satomi.
Satomi looks at Ledio.
:Ledio: You said you're from Japan, right?
:Satomi: Yeah, why?
:Ledio: How'd you learn English?
:Satomi: American reruns on TV. My Japanese is far better than my English though. Observe.
Satomi clears her throat and goes behind a Team Galactic grunt.
:Satomi: (whispering) Watashi wa chīmu gyarakutikku no kuso no atama o kette kimasu.
The grunt freezes up then runs away screaming.
:Ledio: What did you just say to him?
:Satomi: That I'll kick Team Galactic's heads in.
:Ledio: Huh.
:Satomi: I may have thrown an expletive in there too, but who cares?
Ledio smirks.
:Satomi: Anyhoo. We should probably wake Generic up and get going.
Satomi shakes Generic to wake him up but they hear marching in their direction. Satomi looks to see a large army of grunts coming from the floor below. Satomi raises her eyebrows and turns towards the camera.
:Satomi: Don't you just hate it when this sort of thing happens?
Generic looks over Satomi's shoulder.
:Generic: Who are you talking to?
:Satomi: Doesn't matter. Just take those guys out.
Generic nods as Lucas and Dawn are shown two levels below.
:Lucas: How the bloody hell are we catching up to those guys?
:Dawn: Easy.
Dawn gets a cylindrical object out of her jacket.
:Dawn: Observe.
Dawn drops it on the floor as it encapsulates the duo in a plastic pill-shaped machine.
:Dawn: Galactic Eterna Building, floor 2.
The machine shoots off as Lucas and Dawn start screaming, only for the journey to end about two seconds later.
:Dawn: Oh.
Dawn opens the machine as the two start to help Satomi and Generic.
----
Satomi is seen going up a set of stairs as Generic, Ledio, Lucas and Dawn follow.
:Satomi: So, was what Galactic did a decade ago similar to our situation?
:Dawn: Almost note for note the same. We're getting serious deja vu from this.
:Lucas: People in this world never realise what they're doing wrong and in the 11 years we've been here, there's been no attempts to improve security.
:Generic: Ledio said something about a year where a house being robbed every day of the year.
:Lucas: Ah yes. 2010. Anno de burgariis.
:Dawn: Oh, don't do that Latin shit, ya feckin' smartass.
:Lucas: A smartass who you said yes to going out to.
Dawn flips Lucas off as he smirks.
:Satomi: Is this what a relationship's like?
:Lucas: Nah, I think it's just that she's still got alcohol in her system. Dawn's a mean drunk.
They move on as they come across another Team Galactic Commander.
:Ledio: Do you want me to cause a swarm again or...?
:Generic: Nah. I'm trying to stay awake right now; an actual battle would keep me up.
:Ledio: Fair enough.
Satomi gets a Poké Ball out ready to battle the Commander. Dawn brings out her Empoleon as Lucas brings his Torterra out.
:Commander: Well that's a bit unfair, don't you think?
Lucas and Dawn look at each other, smirking.
:Lucas and Dawn: Nah.
The Empoleon jumps in and attacks the Commander as Satomi goes wide-eyed.
:Generic: Jesus fuck! Why do you never stop them?!
Dawn shrugs.
:Dawn: They're doing their job, aren't they?
:Satomi: Empoleon's dangerous as hell though. Their fins are like razors.
Dawn mutters something under her breath.
:Dawn: Fine. Empoleon, come back.
The Empoleon stops instantly as it goes back to Dawn. The Commander is shown to have quite a few cuts all over their body from the attack.
:Generic: Holy shit.
:Dawn: Whoops.
:Commander: Fine. We'll go.
The Commander limps out as the quintet watch her go.
:Ledio: I'm pretty sure I just saw a leg bone then. She must've really got cut badly.
:Satomi: I'm pretty sure she'd have died if I told Dawn how dangerous her Pokémon was.
Generic shudders.
:Generic: Let's just get outta here before any more bizarre shit happens.
The others nod as they set off. Satomi stops and looks at the battle area.
:Satomi: This journey's been really underwhelming so far.
Satomi then walks off with the others.
----
Generic is seen coming out of the Galactic building, to see the tree he knocked down had regrown.
:Generic: How the hell has this grown back so fast?
The others come out.
:Satomi: That happens a lot, trust me.
:Generic: But how?!
:Lucas: It's a mystery.
Generic kicks the tree continuously until it falls over, but doesn't notice Cynthia in front of it as it hits her.
:Cynthia: Jesus fucking-
:Generic: Whoops.
:Dawn: Oh, hi there.
Cynthia looks annoyed.
:Ledio: I don't think she's happy.
:Generic: Trust me, I had no idea you were there.''
:Cynthia: Be more careful next time then.
Cynthia walks off.
:Generic: Cynthia? More like C-
:Ledio: Generic, please. We have camera crew here. Somebody sees this, it's going to ruin our ratings.
:Generic: What camera-
Generic suddenly has a boom mic dropped on him.
:Generic: Ow! What the fuck?!
:Ledio: I don't know who they are either! They've been following us since we met!
Generic looks at the camera.
:Generic: More importantly, how did they get here?!
:Cameraman: We're as lost as you.
:Satomi: Is this a reality series all of a sudden?
:Ledio: No, I'm pretty sure we're in a parody.
:Satomi: This seems more like a fourth wall shattering.
:Dawn: We should just get going.
The quintet set off. Generic looks at the camera.
:Generic: You might as well come along!
:Cameraman: That'd spoil the illusion.
Generic shakes his head as he walks off.
----
Looker is seen in hospital, with his leg in a cast and being held up.
:Looker: Those kids are idiots...
Looker sighs as another person is moved into the room Looker is in. At first it is unclear who it is, but it is eventually shown to be the Commander from the previous scene. The Commander and Looker look at each other and then at the nurse.
:Commander and Looker: Seriously?!
The nurse shrugs.
:Nurse: I don't make the decision on where patients go.
The Commander and Looker look at her, lost.
----
Satomi is seen sat with Dawn, with the others asleep. The two are shown to be playing Mario Kart.
:Dawn: Go on, ya feckin' turtle! Go! Go!
Dawn is shown to cross the line first.
:Dawn: Oh yeah! I'm feeling it!
Dawn pulls out two airhorns from her pockets and blares them.
:Satomi: Where'd you get them?
:Dawn: This jacket has weird portals to other universes in its pockets and I can pull things out of them.
:Satomi: So... it's a pocket universe? Rather literally?
:Dawn: Yeah, I guess.
:Satomi: Huh. So, tomorrow, we're gonna be going to Hearthome City. There's contests there so I might try and enter one of them.
:Dawn: I was in one of them a couple of months ago. The guys went head over heels for me.
Satomi smirks.
:Satomi: We should probably sleep.
:Dawn: Yeah.
Satomi jumps into a sleeping bag and goes to sleep as Dawn drops back too fast and smacks her head hard on the ground.
:Dawn: Jesus fecking hell, I'm an eejit!
==Reception==
TBA
==Trivia==
*In the first scene Ledio references the Wilhelm scream, a sound effect commonly used in movies.
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