Crankmas Poster

:It's a Crankmas Miracle!
:St. Atham hands you the poster. You can't wait to put this up in your room!
:"I'm sure this is just what your assuredly piss-poor excuse of a room needs." St. Atham chuckles. "Now get back to crackin' skulls!"
==Description==
:The Night Before Crankmas
:'Twas the night before Crankmas, when all through F.U.,
:Not a student was studying, even though it's a school.
:The kevlar was worn by the students with care,
:In fear that St. Atham soon would be there.
:The students were huddled all scared in their dorm,
:While visions of violence could be seen in good form.
:When down in Townshire, there came such a boom,
:Even Prof. Adams poked his head out of his room.
:Down in the Mean Streets, with flames burning bright,
:Gangs of thugs were rioting all through the night.
:And just when everything seemed lost to despair,
:A cold, gritty voice rang out through the air.
:"About your health or your safety, I don't give a crap!
:I'm here to kick ass and gain levels, and I've just hit the cap!"
:It was a crazy, bald man in a bitchin' car-sleigh!
:"I'm St. Atham, you tossers! And there's hell to pay!"
:And in less than a second, with no time to wait,
:He revved his engine and called to his cylinders eight;
:"Now, Basher! Now, Smasher! On Shocker and Toxin!
:On, Combat! on, Boomstick! on, Rocker and Boxin'!"
:With a gun in his hand, he charged into the fray,
:And proceeded to blow all the baddies away.
:The last thing I heard, as he ran down some elves,
:Was, "Merry Crankmas, you wankers! You can go @#$% yourselves!"
==Details==
'Crankmas' Poster
Dorm Room Item
Use in your dorm room to change your Poster.
:Nothing says 'holiday cheer' like a the arm of a strung-out adrenaline junkie clutching a makeshift weapon!
 Note: This will replace any existing poster
Category:Items
Category:Article stubs