An Unwanted Visitor Remade

"An Unwanted Visitor Remade", also known as "Mermaid Cock & Barnacle Balls", is the eleventh episode of the first season of Leader Plankton! Remade, and the eleventh episode overall.
== Plot ==
SpongeBob has a new hobby of writing Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy smut.
== Transcript ==
(The episode starts with Squidward sitting next to SpongeBob in SpongeBob’s living room)
Squidward: How’s it going, buddy?
SpongeBob: I-It’s getting better, Squidward. I’ve taken up some new hobbies to take me away from thinking about Patrick.
Squidward: Say, are those hobbies going to the Krusty Krab and flipping Krabby Patties? Because we sure could need you there…
(Cut to the Krusty Krab in utter chaos, Squidward doing one job each with his tentacles, taking customer’s orders, making the patties, cleaning, etc. The windows are broken and there is a massive queue of Bikini Bottomites lining up to get their burnt, ash-coloured patties. Cut back to SpongeBob, completely unaware of the state the Krab is in)
SpongeBob: (chuckles) Nope! I’ve started drawing comic books!
Squidward: (disappointed) What about?
(SpongeBob stands up and takes a piece of scrap white paper off of his bookshelf. It is plastered in crude, cartoonish drawings. He sits back down and starts showing Squidward)
SpongeBob: My favourite childhood superheroes, of course! Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy!
(Bubble transition to Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy in their youth, with Mermaid Man eating a full English breakfast and Barnacle Boy sipping orange juice, whilst watching a breaking news report on TV about a bank heist)
Perch Perkins: This is Perch Perkins with a breaking news report. A bank heist has just taken place at the Bank of Bikini Bottom Bank! The police have named three major suspects: a humanoid in rather homosexual manta ray attire, a bubble covered in sex lube, and a-
(Sudden cut to the Squidward reading the comic)
Squidward: SpongeBob, what the fuck?
SpongeBob: What? What do you mean?
Squidward: “A bubble covered in sex lube?”
SpongeBob: Makes perfect sense to me. Now, no more interruptions! We’re just getting started!
Squidward: Okay, but before I keep reading, I see what you’re doing with your hand. Stop that.
(Cut back to Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, getting prepared to fight the criminals)
Barnacle Boy: Where’s my water gun, Mermaid Man?
Mermaid Man: Here it is, Barnacle Boy. (hands him an AK-47 Nerf gun)
Barnacle Boy: Thank you. Now are you fully equipped to stop those criminal (s)cumbags?
Mermaid Man: Sure am, Barnacle Boy! 
(He straps a pink phallic object to his chest which Barnacle Boy presses, allowing them to fly into the air)
Landlord: (Offscreen) You’ll pay for that roof, homos!
(Cut to the bank; the villains are running out with the money, when out of nowhere they run into Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy buck-naked)
Man Ray: What the… Not the Rudest Nudists again!
Dirty Bubble: I knew that what I ran into seemed exceptionally hard…
Atomic Flounder: Ayy, Bubble, no getting horny on the crime scene. You know that lands us in trouble. (looks at camera) Also, . 
Dirty Bubble: Well, hey, I’m not the person who decided to rob a nursery!
Man Ray: Hey, hey, guys, we might have a bigger problem on our hands.
(He’s holding Mermaid Man’s (pixellated) cock)
Man Ray: Or… in our hands.
Mermaid Man: There will be plenty of time to play with other people’s genitalia when you’re in prison, Man Ray.
Barnacle Boy: Wait, Mermaid Man, we spent all this time lubing up for the occasion, but we didn’t even bring handcuffs!
Mermaid Man: Don’t worry, Barnacle Boy! We’ll just call the police! They’ll handle this as long as we can make sure the villains stay… (they ran away) here. GET ‘EM, BARNACLE BOY!
(Barnacle Boy’s cock becomes a propeller as Mermaid Man eagerly hops on to chase them)
Barnacle Boy: Penis Chopper, AWAY! (They fly in the air)
(The villains open the doors to their pimped-out Tesla Cybertruck and get in, with the Atomic Flounder opening the truck and placing all the stolen money inside. Somehow, the Dirty Bubble, known for his lack of hands or limbs, is driving)
Man Ray: Step on it, shit-ball! And keep your lube off the wheel!
Atomic Flounder: Yeah, don’t make it all sticky like last time. (Turns to the camera) .
(The Cybertruck speeds away, leaving very little trace, and Barnacle Boy and Mermaid Man return to the ground, disappointed)
Barnacle Boy: Well, there’s always next time, Mermaid Man.
Mermaid Man: Don’t worry, Barnacle Boy, I can sniff them out with my dog nose! (Dons a leather BDSM costume as he falls on the ground sniffing the floor, before standing up and pointing) THERE!
(He’s pointing to a police car.)
Barnacle Boy: That’s the police, Mermaid Man. Here to ask us what the suspects looked like and get some more info so they can do their detective work.
(The police car comes to a skid and officers run out, leaping onto Mermaid Man.)
Police Officer: Get down!
(He holds a taser to Mermaid Man’s tight, hairy asshole)
Police Officer: Stay down, creep!
Police Officer #2: You’re both coming with me, you naked hunks of meat.
(He brandishes handcuffs, before the scene fades to Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy sitting in a prison cell together - still naked - with two cellmates, one we can’t see yet and the other being Bubble Bass)
Barnacle Boy: Well… they hated Jesus.
Bubble Bass: Dude, can you guys put some clothes on? You’re making me nauseous. 
(Cut to the Atomic Flounder in a packed theater staring at the camera)
Atomic Flounder: .
(The entire audience of the theater stands up and applauds, before cutting back to the prison, where a naked Seth MacFarlane sits)
Seth MacFarlane: (Laughs) Hi, I’m Seth MacFarlane, creator of such critically acclaimed shows as Family Guy and American Dad.
Bubble Bass: What about the Cleveland-
Seth MacFarlane: (Shoots cellmate) That cutaway was written by me. I am the best at cutaways. Like that time when-
Barnacle Boy: There’s no time for fooling around! We have to stop those criminals before they… uh… do more crime!
Seth MacFarlane: My brother in Christ, we are the ones in prison.
(Seth MacFarlane stands up, holds Barnacle Boy’s shoulders, stares intently in his eyes and whispers intently)
Seth MacFarlane: Don’t you ever think… WE’RE the criminals?
(A brief pause before Seth MacFarlane and Barnacle Boy bind their tongues around each other like shoelaces)
Mermaid Man: Excuse me? I’m right here!
(They continue to make out in front of Mermaid Man and the other cellmate)
Mermaid Man: Uh… Can I join?
Bubble Bass: I too want to join in on this intercourse. (Turns to camera) The US government wants to murder babies. 
(Cut to Bubble Bass and Atomic Flounder having sex at a Trump rally)
Donald Trump: Now this is what America should look like. Two Republicans banging in front of Republican onlookers. The Democrats wouldn’t let this happen!
Secret Service: (Whispering) Uh, Trump… They’re having gay sex.
(Trump literally disintegrates, and a helicopter flies into the Trump rally)
Mike Pence: What in the–
(He is flattened to death as the helicopter lands on him, and Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, accompanied by Seth MacFarlane, jump out)
Mermaid Man: Get your hands off Bubble Bass, you villain!
(Bubble Bass tries to cry for help but the Atomic Flounder covers his mouth)
Atomic Flounder: He says he likes it!
(Bubble Bass’ mouth is covered in tape, his face totally red and blushing))
Barnacle Boy: Wait a second…
(Barnacle Boy pushes the Atomic Flounder off of Bubble Bass, and it is revealed their underwear was still on)
Barnacle Boy: You’re not having gay sex! You’re trying to give him the COVID vaccine!
Atomic Flounder: And I wouldn’t have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling [slur]s. (Turns to face the camera) .
Seth MacFarlane: But Flounder, I thought you were a true Trumper!
Larry the Lobster: No supporter of our ONE TRUE PRESIDENT DONALD J. TRUMP would vaccinate another man’s body! After all, Bubble Bass here already has autism.
Atomic Flounder: All I was trying to do was make sure a fellow AMERICAN was safe from the virus! (Turn to face camera) .
Larry the Lobster: You know what virus we SHOULD be scared of? The WOKE virus! Keep your kids away from the LGBTRMAPQ+ community!
Everyone: Amen!
(“To be continued…” flashes onto the page, as we cut back to SpongeBob reading the story)
SpongeBob: So, did you like my story, Squidward? ..Squidward?
(Zoom out to show SpongeBob in court, and Squidward at the witness stand)
Squidward: He showed me this vulgar comic featuring our beloved superheroes, Mermaid Man…
(Shows Mermaid Man puking his guts out in the courtroom)
Squidward: …Barnacle Boy…
(Shows Barnacle Boy comforting Mermaid Man with his hand suspiciously positioned underneath the table)
Squidward: …and Seth MacFarlane…
(Shows Seth MacFarlane as the judge)
Seth MacFarlane: (In his Brian voice) Whose leg do you have to hump to get a guilty verdict around here? (Laughs for an uncomfortable amount of time before awkwardly clearing his throat)
Squidward: They were engaging in disgusting behaviour, like attending Trump rallies and having gay sex.
(The courtroom gasps)
President Snoop Dogg: Societizzle has gone down the shizzle.
Seth MacFarlane: (slams his gavel) Order! Order! So what is the jury’s verdict?
(Seth MacFarlane steps down from the judge’s chair and joins an empty jury)
Seth MacFarlane: We believe that SpongeBob SquarePants is guilty on all counts of defamation, copyright infringement and putting the milk in before the cereal. 
(Everyone gasps even harder, including Seth MacFarlane for some reason, who runs back to the Judge stand and slams his gavel)
Seth MacFarlane: GUILTY, GUILTY, 20 YEARS IN PRISON!
SpongeBob: But-but who gets custody of Gary?
(Cut to SpongeBob’s house, where the Dirty Bubble and Atomic Flounder are looking after Gary)
Dirty Bubble: Now… let’s see how well that slime works as a lubricant.
Gary: (Facing camera) Mama mia!
(End)
== Trivia ==
* This episode actually has jack shit to do with Leader Plankton!
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