Blackwind

Blackwind is a pretty standard-looking black shorthair with "lemon-yellow" eyes and a black star on his chest. He was born in Seaclan under Mallowstar's leadership, mentored under Dovestar, and survived the Great Freeze to see Cloudstar rise to the position.
== Personality ==
To be edited proper later
•"Blackpaw is a showboat, constantly hyping himself up and trying to act smarter and more capable than he is. He is afraid to admit when he doesn't know something, to the point where he doesn't ask questions out of fear of looking incompetent. He is extremely ambitious, practicing his skills constantly since kittenhood, and can get it in his mind that he really is the best. When he fails to live up to his own expectations, he is absolutely crushed. Blackpaw loves hearing the elders' stories, enchanted by the descriptions of adventure and far-away lands. He wants to experience those stories for himself, and he wants to be the hero. He can be very reckless in his attempts to make his own adventures, such as the time he got impatient waiting for Dovestar to come out to train him and decided to see if he could catch something impressive, like a fox kit or an eagle. As an older apprentice, he grows into himself a bit more. He is still much like he always was, but he also shows himself to have a very kind and nurturing side. He is well-respected by Troutstream, who he gets to open up about her concerns with Stormblaze's worsening cough, and leads her to the medicine den himself, insistent that she shouldn't wait just because the timing is inconvenient. He also actively chooses to spend time with some of the young kittens, displaying many of the same traits he has in modern interactions with Lakekit. He enjoys showing off his skills to them, and helping them get it right, and he makes sure to boost their confidence as much as possible in the process. Honestly, Shadow did well with him in that interaction. He also shows that he can be empathetic, befriending Tigerpaw and acting as his foot-in-the-door for the rest of the clan. Tigerpaw later comes to Blackie when building his confidence around the water, instead of just sticking to Cherry and Cloud. Blackpaw offers him an out when Delta arrives."
* Likes kids; is very good with them, and with teaching
* Struggles to ask for help or admit he doesn't know something
* Competitive, constantly working to be better, prone to anger and envy when he doesn't meet his own standards
* loves the ocean
* excess energy, needs something to occupy him at all times, fidgets even in his sleep
* thrives on adrenaline rush and excitement; wants grand adventure, needs constant environmental change to feel fulfilled. Torn loyalty between the island he was raised on and everything beyond. Free spirit. 
* Cannot admit when he doesn't know something, struggles to ask for help or ask questions; as an adult, he really overcompensates trying to be the mature adult who knows what he's doing.
* Independent and too prideful for his own good
== History (Bullet Points) ==
Blackpaw was the runt of the first and only litter between Brightspark and Sparrowflight, sickly and developmentally behind his three littermates Wavepaw, Eaglepaw, and Shinekit.
* Siblings acting as caregivers of sorts
* Being left out of his siblings' games because he couldn't keep up and maybe they kind of forgot he was part of their litter when they were really young (but he still got socialization from his parents and in the medicine den, so he's not too socially behind)
* Still need to explore his relationship with Ternwing. The two might know each other well, since she's four moons older. Around his age, but not so close to his age that she was out playing with the other kittens. She was a medicine cat already for most of Black's kittenhood, two moons and later. She might have been there more than his own parents, who were taking turns keeping him company and watching the siblings. Ternpaw would have been a constant. (He might have learned a lot about basic herbs from observation. Always wanted to know what the rest were for, but never asked.)
* Apprenticed to Dovestar, potentially only a week or less before she became leader.
* Competition with the siblings really begins the very first day of apprenticeship. Cute story with that. 
* Competitive with siblings; conflict with Shinepaw, becomes friends with Wavepaw, who even knows with Eaglepaw
* Shipwreck; befriends Tigerpaw, might start coming out of his shell to interact with more clanmates already. Might grow to love adventure more after hearing of more tales from beyond the island.
* LOVES teaching kittens all the things he learns. He gets to show off and be admired. He is actually more capable than someone, and he loves it.
* Something to do with the lighthouse?
* Meeting Esrila, becoming friends, meeting up in secret; he was raised partly under Mallowstar's rule, and Mallowstar was cautious of strangers. Both crushing on each other and having a little teen romance. Blackpaw may or may not have been aware of how welcoming the clan would actually be, but he loved the thrill of the secret or of pretending it was a big scandal. 
* Esrila got injured on the rocks once, but I bet Blackpaw did too. Maybe before he met her, maybe severe bruising but nothing keeping him from training for super long periods of time.
* During the Great Freeze, Blackpaw might've been the first to get sick, when food was still available and snow rarely fell. His siblings may have taken up the role of caretakers like it was second nature, but they soon fell ill. By then, the hunger and cold was significant; Wavepaw and Eaglepaw passed, but Shinepaw pulled through. Blackwind later got sick again and came very very close to death. Two of his siblings, his parents, his mentor, so many cats dying... It deeply affects his already-strained relationship with Shinepaw, who also survived but puts the blame on Blackpaw.
* Blackpaw stayed at home most of The Freeze, hunting and trying to stay alive. With a small island and a lot of mouths to feed, he had it worse in regards to food and illness than Esrila did. He didn't meet with her at all, while she kept waiting by the beach or bridge for his return. He almost died, and the friendship was put on the backburner to survival. When he did finally return, he was quieter, and he was alive. Esrila must have felt abandoned, even betrayed, not realizing that not everyone has it as easy as she does. The start to a massive rift in their relationship, especially if Blackpaw is more distant and doesn't seem to care as much.
* But they work things out and slowly become friends again. Esrila is pushy and insists on always meeting on the island, while Blackpaw wants more than ever to leave and find his own adventure. But he's quieter than he was before, without the physical or emotional energy to fight her on it, a pattern that continues once he's healthier and moves on from his grief (because he can't admit that he was weak, even if it was in the past, can't explain why he's seemingly changing his mind now, has to be consistent and pretend he was in control the whole time).
* Becomes Blackwind
* Gets tired of the secrecy and routine when nothing really matters anyway, so he invites Esrila into camp. The pirates were welcomed with open arms, so it's unlikely she'll be turned away-- but even so, he's just tired of the same routine, wants something new, thinks inviting he rin is a good way to do that. She earns the name Echopaw, and he is her mentor.
* Echopaw, wants to go get her brother. But he left home after she did, and wandered far. Blackwind followed his scent out, but lost the scent back. Instead of following the coast, the obvious choice, he followed the scent of smoke that he could smell faintly from the island. Decided he'd just travel downwind from there. Echopaw really didn't like his plan, but didn't offer one of her own-- or, if she did suggest the coast thing, he didn't hear it. Regardless, he knew the easy route of finding and following the shore, but he still chose to do it his way because he was starved of that adventure.
* Lynx attack. The final straw for Echopaw, who thought of him as a savior and thinks that savior intentionally left her to die. Angry and upset, refuses to listen to anything he says to apologize. Lots of drama.
* Tigerspark receives a vision that he and a patrol need to go on a long journey, far from the island, to save everyone from a horrible disease. Blackwind is the perfect cat to bring on the journey: knowledgeable with basic herbs, and has wanted adventure and excitement since he was a kid, wanted to be the hero of a fairy tale adventure. But Echopaw is still his apprentice, and Cloudstar wants them to work it out, so she is brought too. Blackwind, the very morning the patrol is set to leave, backs out and allows Magpie to take his place. Turns down the adventure he always wanted, waited for his entire life. On the patrol are his best friend, the closest thing to a mentor that was still alive, Magpie who inspired his love of adventure tales, the child of a close friend who Blackwind had helped teach, a new medicine cat he might have worked with for a short period of time, and Echopaw. Echopaw, who instilled self-doubt he'd never really felt before, who treated him like garbage ever since the incident, whose abuse he couldn't bring himself to face.
* So he stayed back, practically alone in the clan when it comes to cats he can really talk to. Still has Troutstream, still has the stoic Ternwing, maybe Stormblaze, but Blackwind has never been one to confide in others, to show weakness, never really developed the skills to be vulnerable, hiding the pain behind a mask. He's left with Shinepaw, who makes it known just how much she hates him, how much she blames him for his inadequacies, all the things left behind. He's left with the memories of warriors deceased, of haunting cries on the wind and spectral eyes always watching even when the world was asleep. Laughter, muted by his grief, a too-quiet world desolate of all the things he once held so dear. (Note: it'd be interesting to have another interaction with Troutstream, to see how she handles all this with a cat she seems to deeply respect despite his youth. Perhaps sees him as a nephew of sorts, much like Dovestar does?)
* He stayed, because the rest of the world didn't want him. He stayed, because he knew nothing of life outside the island. He stayed, because what did it matter what he did?
* But he's also left with Sandwhisker, a friendship he never really got to develop with everything going on before, whose child went on the journey with the others. She, who had seen him interact with Timberpaw and nurture his spirit even in the darkest of times, and who had been on the journeys Blackwind so desired. a partner in crime.
* The two bonded, with Sandwhisker helping to remind him of all the little things he loved about the beach, finding her own adventures and letting him tag along. He began to heal, and to grow into himself more, to take on the tasks he loved and find his own path within the clan. Calming and maturing with age, but learning to love himself and be proud of what he can do, even if that anxiety still buzes under his skin, still impacts his life and affects his confidence and decisions. He's getting there.
== More In-Depth History ==
Third Person Omniscient, containing some parts from others' POVs.
When Blackkit was born, he was the smallest and weakest in a litter of four. 
Struggled to thrive as a kitten, barely hung on, and the bad luck followed with him through his childhood. Raised in the medicine den, too small and weak and sickly to play with his larger siblings of the same litter, left out of their games like he didn't exist even when he was at home and better.
But his parents loved him. They did everything they could to help him grow and thrive. They cried when he was upset, they grieved when he was sick, they laughed and held him dear.
And when he got older, bad luck would follow him in waves, interspersed with happier moments. Low birth weight, failure to thrive, accidental poisoning, sickness... But as he got older, he got stronger, hospital stays and bedrest grew shorter as he caught up. He spent every waking moment moving and practicing and learning, trying to catch up with his siblings.
And when they're old enough to gain mentors, he is still smaller than the rest, still weaker, but growing, closing the gap. 
He becomes friends with his sister, Wavepaw. He stops being left out of their games.
Their first day training, Shinepaw boasts about a successful first hunt. Wavepaw keeps her own catch under wraps so as not to upset him. To bring up the mood, before Blackpaw and Shinepaw could start a fight, Wavepaw declared a competition: whoever caught the most prey in a week, in a month, in a year would be a champion. 
Things went uphill, for a time. 
Blackwind (or Blackpaw, at this point in time) wanted more. He wanted to know what lay beyond the safe little island they called home. He had freedom, he could do what he wanted, but... He'd never *had* freedom before. He'd never left home, never been away from his parents or his doctors or his siblings. No one left the island.
So he made a friend. A loner, who lived across the canal, their homes separated only by a bridge. Esrila was her name.
Every day and every night, the two would meet and splash in the waves in secret. A spark of fear for Blackpaw who knew the risk if they were caught together. A hint of safety and stability for Esrila who lived in fear of her mother's wrath, at the mercy of her father's negligence.
Blackpaw grew strong, chasing danger and excitement for the thrill of it. Dreaming of the day he might leave the island to explore what lay beyond. He quickly began to catch up with his siblings, forever stunted but growing capable. Scaling cliffs and ambushing albatrosses, paddling through waves and facing storms like a child in the rain. Meeting Esrila in secret when no one was around.
But the ocean is not kind to her lovers. She takes and she *breaks,* and Esrila was no different. 
(Blackpaw would go on to plead for Moonheart and Ternpaw to save Ezzie’s life. Blackpaw always was a lucky one; Esrila would live to tell the tale. If only Blackpaw could stick around to hear it.)
A ship crashed onto their island, full of pirates and suffering. (This was actually right around the time they started training, whoops; this pirate crew might be what influenced some of his adventurous dreams and reckless nature.)
With them came a scrawny, broken child Blackpaw's own age, and a crew who had allowed him to suffer. A lightning-struck cat who spoke no words except for the bubbling in their lungs and a constant stench of ozone filling the air. A mysterious stranger who almost seemed like he'd been there before. 
Blackpaw and the damaged child his own age became fast friends, perhaps recognizing likeness in suffering despite vastly different walks of life.
This friend was called Tigerpaw. Two months later, a living corpse washed up on the beach, reeking of rot. The village took him in to heal his wounds and take pity, but this cat had committed unspeakable atrocities to Tigerpaw in the past. 
We don't know where the story with them had gone. Perhaps the drowned sailor repented for his past deeds. Perhaps, when Blackpaw fell ill, he used it as an opportunity to lure him close with false kindness and pull him down with him. It's a good thing Blackpaw had others to look out for him.
*Had* others to look out for him.
When Blackpaw fell ill, it was sudden and painful, stealing the breath from his lungs and burning from within, the fae's endless dance in a ring of toadstools almost too much for his weak little body.
But it was only the beginning of winter and medicinal herbs grew wild, stocked and dried from summer and autumn. He would pull through, little worse for wear than when he began.
While he healed, a blizzard hit and the cold front stuck, sudden and devastating. Food became scarce, and many herbs were damaged in frost.
As Blackpaw healed, his three siblings fell ill. 
Wavepaw and Eaglepaw-- the idea and the wisdom, the empathy and the observer, both died; Shinepaw, their loyal follower, survived. Both Shinepaw and Blackpaw lost their parents, their siblings, and their mentors.
Once Blackpaw's caregiver in childhood, Shinepaw now stood as his greatest foe, bitter and jealous that he lived and they died. They got sick because they were taking care of him; he should have been the one to die. He always was the weakest link.
Blackpaw, the first to fall ill, was also the last. The second time far outweighed the first. In feverish dreams that lasted through the days and nights, he saw lands and lives lost to him, he saw familiar strangers reach out to him, he felt the cold winds deep in his bones while his skin burned in the sun. 
Blackpaw should have died. Moons of his life were taken by the sickness-- his own, his family's, and his own yet again. And yet, despite the touch-and-go, despite his weak immune system, he survived— saved by chance: prey waking from their slumber, streams melting, snow revealing hidden twigs of life-saving roots.
(This made Shinepaw angry— and perhaps she was right; Perhaps it should have been the end for Blackpaw.)
And when he recovered, he hunted for his clan. And when he recovered, he helped Ternwing treat the sick and dress the dead. 
And when the clan moved on, he wondered what was left.
And when he was at his lowest, he trudged out to the territory for what, in a different world, in a different universe, in a different life, might have been the last time. But Blackpaw had a different kind of luck.
His paws carried him out and away from the prying eyes of his clanmates, to a place he had never been or perhaps to a place he would always be. Beyond the island, or to the frozen sea. 
And there, in that purgatory of what was real and what was not, and what was and was yet to be, Esrila stepped out from the vastness of space to join at his side.
Alone in a vast and empty universe, he had a friend. He had two friends: Tigerpaw, who had suffered just as much; Esrila, who could not understand why he had left, could not understand why only now did he return.
It hurt. And maybe things would never be okay again. But he wasn't alone. He had the shattered but beautiful remains of a family that loved him, strung together with golden silk.
Step by step, things became almost okay again.
.-.-.
Esrila joined the clan, once upon a time. Blackpaw had become Blackwind, and he feared not punishment, chasing that desperate, mournful need for things to change so they might stay the same. 
Echopaw, in turn, escaped her abusive parents, but left her brother behind. She had not the courage to face them alone, but Blackwind had been raised on an island of peace. He knew not of the dangers of the world beyond, lured more than ever into the song of the wilds when he had so little to leave behind.
Confident and purposeful in his steps, Echopaw felt she had no reason to fear, with him around. He had been raised on kindness and love, in a clan of warriors. If anyone could protect her, it would be him.
For her, Blackwind had always been her safe space. Somewhere to escape to when home reeked of fear and foreboding, when all her thoughts were plagued by wondering when Mom would come home and the anvil would fall. 
Blackwind was predictable, soft-spoken and kind in a way home never was. When he smiled, it reached his eyes. When he laughed, it was never at her. When he told exaggerated stories, it was never to deceive.
When she slammed against the rocks, many moons ago, her rose-tinted glasses cracked. Her rock, constant and stable ground beneath her feet, failing.
But when he returned, carrying herbs and with help trailing behind-- for only a moment did she fear they might hurt her. Her rock came back, and with his healing hands came a gentleness she had never known. It taped her glasses back together again, and for now she could pretend it was all okay again.
Except, Blackwind stopped coming. Her injuries were temporary, but the claws only dug deeper into her heart with each day that didn't pass.
It was many moons until she saw him again. With his thick winter coat, she hardly noticed the way his skin clung to his ribs. She had never met other cats before, could not recognize the dullness of his eyes or the rasp of his breathing.
As far as she knew, sheltered in her cozy little cottage with no knowledge of famine or disease, he had abandoned her. And now he came back, with a fake smile that didn't reach his eyes, trying to act as though nothing had happened.
Just this once, maybe she could pretend, too. She didn't ask where he had been. She didn't care so long as he was here. For now, she could squint through the cracks and follow his lead, her pawsteps falling in line with his own, a perfect match like they had always belonged.
(Artistic rendition: she walks perfectly in his footsteps. He leaves pawprints in the snow. On camera, they look large. Esrila steps perfectly into one, and it looks like a perfect fit-- until her paw raises and we see that the footstep she left behind is physically larger than the way she left it. If that makes any sense.)
--
But the clan was a new and different thing that she was used to. It was kind, and there were people. But as much as she wanted to leave her old home and her past behind, there was one thing missing: her brother.
She didn't want to go back home alone, so she convinced Blackwind to lead her back out. 
The first sign was that he didn't know the way to her home. She reminded herself that he had never been there before, so how could she expect him to know?
And it was okay because when they got there, her brother was long gone, scent stale. He had escaped, too. But Echopaw needed him. He was part of her rock. She wasn't going back to the clan without him.
Without a word home, Blackwind began tracking. Not as experienced as the older warriors, he was no expert, but Echopaw didn't notice nor care. He was her rock.
When they found him, Irpa was far from home, wandering and hungry. He had never been taught to hunt nor find shelter. He wanted to stay out in the area he had found for himself, but he had no voice to speak when his sister ordered him to follow-- no means to support himself alone.
So he followed, the largest of the three but somehow the quietest. If Blackwind closed his eyes, he could forget Irpa was there. If he tried to speak or sign, Irpa would only shut down further. 
So they went home.
Except, Blackwind had never left home before this. He'd spent his entire life on an island, supported on the shoulders of every warrior that had lived before him, every ancestor he had never met that had led them to that place. He knew how to track scents unlike his own, but now their three scents all mingled together and his nose became blind to it. 
To find his way home, he decided to follow another scent. From the island, atop the rocks or when Tigerpaw (Tigerspark) challenged him to climb the highest tree, he could smell... *Something.* He hadn't the faintest clue how to describe it, and had always wondered what sort of thing could cause it.
Blackwind was no expert tracker, but he knew the direction of the wind. At night, the hot air from land blew to the sea-- and so, if they found the source of the scent, they only had to follow the wind back home.
It was halfway through this plan that Echopaw noticed the scent of the sea fading behind them. The same ocean that brought Blackwind freedom and comfort was the same ocean Echopaw had found her rock (even if that ocean had brought agony she could still feel at the dawning of each storm and the coldest parts of the nights). 
Her rose-tinted glasses shattered the moment she realized they were lost-- panic turning to anger, lashing out with the same barbed tongue her mother had always called *love.*
And Blackwind had never been yelled at in such a way, not even from Shinepaw. He stated his case, calm like his father had taught, firm like his mother, and yet Echopaw didn't listen, angry beyond reason and taking it out on him.
That night, Blackwind curled into himself, alone and shivering while Echopaw used her twin for warmth.
Blackwind continued his plan. Blackwind was born of spite and pride, and he would not turn back to follow the coast instead. His original plan would work. (It hurt that she didn't trust him.)
And his plan did work. He got to see what the strange smell was, got to experience things he had only heard about in stories.
He wanted to enjoy the adventure. It was hard, when his own anxiety spiked at the bombardment of so many new smells, so different from the forest coast he grew up in. (It was harder still when his best friend made her vitriol clear.)
But they made it back to the territory surrounding Echopaw's home. 
It was the final stretch, and from the bushes pounced a lynx— a cub, double Blackwind's size, which grabbed Echopaw like a cat would grab a mouse.
Blackwind froze. He had never encountered a large predator before. Those on the island always seemed to get chased off by the other warriors before news reached Blackwind that they had been there at all.
He froze, and it was Buri who leapt out from the grasses in defense of her daughter. 
Echopaw refused so much as to look at him, after that. 
They made it back. Blackwind tried to apologize, each one genuine, not knowing what he did wrong. He only got screamed at or ignored for his efforts, and Shinepaw only seemed smug to rub it in his face.
.-.-.
A couple months later, with no progress made to repair their relationship, Tigerspark gets a vision foreshadowing death and disease plaguing their home again. A sign to leave their home, to travel long and far for a remedy of a disease, the likes of which they had never seen before.
Tigerspark to lead, Timberpaw to learn. Cloudstar to guide, Sharptongue to heal. 
Tigerspark, Blackwind's best friend. Timberpaw, who Blackwind had helped to babysit at times. Cloudstar, the closest thing Blackpaw had to a mentor after the death of his own. Sharptongue, who had worked tirelessly with Ternwing to heal the sick. All cats Blackwind knew and loved, going on a journey Blackwind would kill for.
Blackwind wanted to be the hero. He wanted a grand adventure of his own from the first story he had ever heard. He wanted excitement and novelty, wanted to live a life worth remembering, to prove to himself that he survived, to overcome his setbacks and truly live, when so much of his life was taken from him.
Tigerspark himself aside, there was no better cat in the clan to join the patrol. But Blackwind was Echopaw's mentor, and Cloudstar was hoping the journey would repair their broken relationship.
The morning they were to leave, a little black birdie told a lightning-struck ex-pirate to look out for their little brother. Magpie stepped out to meet the party like they were always meant to be there, and Blackwind was nowhere to be found.
.-.-.
And alone, Blackwind felt, as he mourned the loss of his lifelong dream. And alone, he wondered if this was accepting death, if he was sealing his fate by staying home. 
But alone, he had a chance to heal from what Echopaw had torn with her barbed-wire tongue. Alone, he made a friend. And with that friend, with the family who stayed behind, he found himself a purpose and pulled himself through, bit by bit.
He couldn't be the same cat he used to be, but perhaps he could learn to be something new.
.-.-.
And we don't know where the story will go.
*
== Trivia ==
* Blackwind was a character carried over from the original forum through the Great Freeze time skip. He is thought to be named after the late elder, Blackfur.
* Blackwind is played by Shadow of the Raven's Wing
* He is generally considered a good jumper, and mainly hunts sea birds for the fight. He has almost been killed by the albatrosses more times than he can count.
Category:Characters
Category:Seaclan Cats
Category:Warriors