Milo Murphy's Law and Phineas and Ferb Crossover (Fanon) Part 1

This episode continues from Fungus Among Us
Dakota: Pizza delivery guy?
Doofenshmirtz: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was trying to trap the pizza delivery so I wouldn't have to pay him. But the real question is, who are you?
Milo: I'm Milo, this is Dakota, Cavendish, Dr.Zone and Diogee.
Doofenshmirtz:The dog's name is Diogee? What's that all about?
Cavendish:That doesn't matter. What matters is that monster pistachio plants are taking over the world, and we know what caused it, so we need your help to go back in time and stop them from ever being born. Can you please help us Professor time?
Doofenshmirtz: Going back in time? Professor time? I'm no help to you there. All my inators are useless and don't work.
Dakota: (whispers to Cavendish) Are you sure this is the right guy?
Cavendish: Almost positive! In fact, the time machine used to be called, "The Time Inator" when it was created, but it was renamed "Time Machine" by a very smart person.
Doofenshmirtz: And by the way, I am not Professor Time.
Doofenshmirtz: Although I may have a way to help you.
Milo:Tell us!
Doofenshmirtz: My do-over inator! It has tungsten wire, einsteinium, and--
Doofenshmirtz pauses
Milo: Um... Professor? What's wrong?
Doofenshmirtz slaps his forehead
Doofenshmirtz: (groans) My do-over inator got sucked into a time rift!
Milo: But can't we just re-do it? (chuckles) get it?
Doofenshmirtz:I got those rare materials from some kids online. We can't find them now.
Dakota:Then why don't we just ask them for more?
Doofenshmirtz: I don't know where they live, or how we're gonna get there. They probably won't even any of those materials left, even worse, they were probably replaced by the pistachions!
Perry the platypus crashes through the door
Doofenshmirtz: Perry the platypus, we need your help!
Perry turns his watch on and Major Monogram comes on the screen
Major Monogram: Agent P? What's the emergency?
Doofenshmirtz: Major Monogram, we need your help. Can you bring a spare hovercraft? We need to go somewhere to get rid of the pistachions.
Major Monogram: That wasn't you? Okay we'll be on our way.
Orton Molson: Who was that? What's the plan? Can someone please explain what's going on here?
Doofenshmirtz opens up blueprints on a table
Doofenshmirtz: Okay, first, I'll set you free.
Dakota: Can that be like, now?
Doofenshmirtz: Can it, (As in ‘shut up’) 70’s guy!
Doofenshmirtz: Next, we'll board the hovercraft.
Shows them boarding the hovercraft
Doofenshmirtz: After that, I'll connect my computer to the GPS to track down the kids' location.
shows them in the hovercraft with Doofenshmirtz connecting the computer to the GPS
Doofenshmirtz: Once we're there, we'll use a diversion to get past the pistachions guarding the streets, and sneak in.
shows them sneaking by the side of the kids' house
Doofenshmirtz: (whispers to the gang) Alright, the coast is clear.
The gang tip-toes to the door
Orton Molson: (whispers) So then, who was that beaver duck thing?
Doofenshmirtz: (whispers) No time to explain. We need to go see those kids.
Doofenshmirtz rings the doorbell
Unknown 1: Everyone, fighting positions.
Unknown 2: But what if they are not pistachions?
Unknown 3: We can't take that chance. You know what they did to Mom and Dad.
Doofenshmirtz opens door slowly to see nothing but darkness through the doorway
Doofenshmirtz: Um...hello?
everyone waits for a moment
All Unknowns: (scream) Get 'em!
They throw a rope outside and pull Doofenshmirtz into the house
Doofenshmirtz: Ahhhh!
Milo: Professor Time?
silence
The rope comes out and pulls him in
Milo: Ahhhh!
Cavendish: Oh goodness--
the rope pulls him in too
Cavendish: Ahhhh!
Dakota: Great Googly--
the rope pulls him in too
Dakota: Ahhhh!
Orton Molson: I better get--
the rope pulls him in too
Orton Molson: Ahhhh!
The door slams on its own, and with fear Dioggee scampers off
Unknown 2: Hey! These are not pistachions! I was right.
Unknown 1: Then let's untie them.
Dakota: Hey, can someone hit the lights?
Unknown 3: Your voice sounds different--
Unknown 3 turns on the lights
Unknown 3 (now known as to be Phineas): --Isabella.
Unknown 1 (now known as to be Isabella): Uh, Phineas, that wasn't me.
Unknown 2 (now known as to be Baljeet): It was not me either.
Dakota: Yeah, whatever, it was me. Milo, explain.
Milo: Well...
5 hours later...
Milo: So we need your help!
Phineas: Dude, there's a working time machine at the museum.
Cavendish: So why don't we just go there?
Phineas: Great idea, but you'll need some help.
Later...
Phineas: Hey Ferb, you got the sorbet machine?
Ferb nods while pushing the machine
Phineas: Okay, great!
Doofenshmirtz: How's a sorbet machine gonna help us?
Phineas: You'll see.
Orton Molson: (writing in his notepad) This is so rich, and so inexplicably weird!
Phineas inserts the word "Pistachions" into the screen on the sorbet machine
Phineas: Alright, that should do it. Okay everyone, stand in front of that ray.
The ray zaps Milo, Dakota, Baljeet, Isabella and Orton Molson a.k.a Dr.Zone. The ray then turns around and zaps Phineas, Ferb, Doofenshmirtz, and Cavendish
Milo rubs his forehead on the floor after being turned into a pistachion
Milo: Ugh, what happened?
Doofenshmirtz: So, did we turn into sorbet?
Silence
Doofenshmirtz: Milo?
Milo turns around
Milo: Yeah?
They both look at each other not knowing that they are in the form of a pistachion
Both: Ahhhh!
Milo: Phineas! Professor Time turned into a pistachion!
Phineas: Yeah?
Milo looks at him for a moment
Milo: Ahhhh!
Milo screams for a long time. Milo screams so loudly that everything in the house starts to shake, and a vase full of flowers falls off a small table and starts rolling on the floor, then eventually stops at a tall mirror, and from the domino effect, the mirror falls on Milo. Milo stops screaming when he's crushed by the mirror. Milo then tips the mirror off of him and looks at himself
Milo: (Gasps) I'm a pistachion!
Baljeet: Yes, we are all pistachions. It is our diversion to get into the museum.
Milo: Wow, great idea, let's go!
Later...
Phineas: (whispers to the gang) There's the museum!
One pistachion is guarding the museum until another one comes out, they start talking
Pistachion 1: So?
Pistachion 2: We inspected the area sir.
Pistachion 1: And?
Pistachion 2 grabs his phone, and pulls up a picture of the time machine from the museum
Pistachion 2: We found a time machine sir.
Pistachion 1: How do you know that's a time machine?
Pistachion 2: I accidentally sent me and Jimmy back in time... to the Prehistoric Era.
Pistachion 1: Where is Jimmy?
Pistachion 2: (Takes a gulp) He got smashed by a T-Rex. So then I came back here...
Pistachion 1: Alright then. Take the time machine back to our base. Then we'll tear this place down.
Pistachion 2: Yes sir!
Pistachion 2 walks away
Dakota: Guys, they're gonna tear this place down!
Pistachion 1: (screams) Who's there?
Dakota: Uh..hi.
Pistachion 1: (uses a calm and gentle voice) Oh, is that you Jimmy?
Dakota: (studders) Uh, yeah... we uh... found another... machine, but we don't know... what it does...
Pistachion 1: Hmmm.
Pistachion 1: Okay, but you've got a half hour before we tear this place down.
Dakota: Uh...okay.
Pistachion 1: I'm going back to the base. Meet me there when you're done
Pistachion 1 walks away
Dakota: (whispers to the gang) Come on guys. Let's go.
The gang walks in the museum, and then cheers
Perry: (makes platypus sound)
Phineas: Oh, there you are Perry.
Orton Molson: Hey, isn't that the--
Dakota: Hey guys, I think I found the time machine.
The gang runs toward Dakota to see the time machine
Cavendish: Yup. That's the one. The first ever time machine.
Doofenshmirtz: Now all I have to do is get the blueprints, and put them in a time capsule for me in 12 years.
Phineas hands Doofenshmirtz the blueprints for the time machine
Phineas:Here you go.
Doofenshmirtz:Thanks kid.
Phineas:Baljeet, Isabella, you guys stay here.
Perry:(makes platypus sound again)
Phineas:You too Perry.
Phineas:The rest of us have to go in the time machine.
Phineas puts his hand on the lever ready to go back in time
Phineas:So, where and when to?
Orton Molson:Well, he said that he waited ten years, so we should go to 1955.
Dakota:Wow, you right everything in that notebook.
Phineas:1955, here we come!
Phineas pulls the lever
They're now in 1955
Phineas:Hmmm... seems like the museum hasn't been built yet.
A hole rips in the space time continuum
Cavendish:(gasps) A hole in the space time continuum!
Everyone runs to the time machine
Phineas:We need to go back and fix the anomaly.
Phineas pulls the lever but nothing happens
Phineas:Um...
Phineas pulls the lever again
Phineas:Huh?
Phineas pulls the lever quickly back and forth
Phineas:Come on!
Dakota holds up the plug to the time machine
Dakota:Uh, guys, I think we have a problem.
Then suddenly Derek (the pistachion king's son) jumps out of the hole
The hole closes and Derek looks at the banner on the street that says "1955 town fair". He thinks to himself with a grin and quickly runs off. Meanwhile Phineas and the gang were spying on him on the side of a building
Milo:So that's how it happened.
Phineas:But how did he even get here?
Dakota:Hmmm... well maybe when I hit a pistachion with a bag of clocks in the time stream, it sucked him into a different time.
Milo:That makes sense, but how are we gonna destroy him?
Phineas:Well how did you destroy him last time?
Milo:Diogee peed on him! Diogee, get over here!
Milo waits
Milo:Diogee? Oh no, Diogee didn't come with us. We left him outside. He's probably barking "How has your day been progressing" in dog language to other dogs by now. What are we gonna do?
Doofenshmirtz pats Milo on the shoulder
Ferb looks at his watch and it starts beeping
A big cloud comes over them with a "Poof" sound affect, and they turn back into humans
Milo looks at his hands
Milo:(gasps) I'm not a pistachion anymore!
Doofenshmirtz pats Milo on the shoulder again
Doofenshmirtz:Don't worry Milo, at least we--
Doofenshmirtz pauses
Doofenshmirtz:Sorry kid, I've got nothing.
Phineas:Oh, I forgot we only set it to last an hour.
Cavendish:We may need to come up with another plan.
Everyone stops to think
Dakota:It's gonna be a lot harder to defeat a moving pistachio.
Doofenshmirtz:What kills pistachios really?
Phineas:Candace would know, she's doing a science report on pistachios.
Phineas:Hey, where is Candace?
Meanwhile...
Candace and Vanessa are running from people
Vanessa:Candace, let's hide over here!
Vanessa opens a door and she holds it open for Candace to run in
Vanessa:Hurry up they're coming!
A group of people are running after Vanessa and Candace
The group of people:Come with us children!
Vanessa slams the door and Candace holds it closed so no-one can get in
Candace:Lock the door! Lock the door!
Vanessa starts pushing a couch towards the door
Vanessa:Candace, help me with this!
Candace holds the door with her foot while pulling the couch towards it
They then placed it, and Vanessa locked the door with the lock
Candace:There. That should hold--
The group of people push down the door
Both girls:Ahhhh!
The girls are cornered
Candace:Vanessa, what are we gonna do?
Vanessa:I don't--
The people blow a sleeping gas out of a flower
Vanessa: --know...
Candace:I'm getting...tired
Then both girls fall on the ground asleep
The group of people take their masks off and reveal themselves to be pistachions in disguise
Pistachion 1:Take ‘em to the van.
Later... Vanessa and Candace are asleep in the windowless van
Candace wakes up
Candace:Ugh, what happened?
Candace:Oh no! Where are they taking us?
Candace shakes Vanessa to wake her up
Vanessa:Candace? What happened?
Candace:The pistachi--
The pistachions pull them out of the van
Both girls:Ahhhh!
Vanessa:Where are we going?
The pistachions put them in the pods in which Sara was put in, in the episode Fungus Among Us
Candace:Urg! Get me out of here!
The camera takes a picture of Candace when she isn't looking
Candace:Vanessa, where are you?
Vanessa:Over here!
A female pistachion walks into another pod to be dressed as Candace in disguise
Then finally they put Candace's face as a mask on her
Pistachion dressed as Candace:How has your day been progressing?
Candace:What?!
Another female pistachion walks into another pod to be dressed as Vanessa in disguise
Then finally they put Vanessa's face as a mask on her
Pistachion dressed as Vanessa:How has your day been progressing?
Vanessa:What!?
The pistachions grab hold of both girls again and take them to the cages Sara was taken to, in the episode Fungus Among Us
Vanessa:Let us go!
Candace:Where are you taking us?!
The pistachions throw them in the cages
Vanessa:(sighs) How are we ever going to get out of here?
Candace:Please, don't think I don't have an idea.
Candace:This obviously has to do with Phineas and Ferb. I'll just call them, and we'll be on our way out of here!
Candace calls Phineas on her phone
Robotic phone voice:This phone number does not exist.
Candace:Hmmm... that's odd. I'll try calling Isabella or someone instead.
Sara:Candace?
Candace:Sara?
Sara:Candace, you're okay!
Candace:Yeah I'm fine. I have an idea to get out of here. I tried calling Phineas, but something went wrong, so now I'm gonna call Isabella.
Sara:Great idea! I'll call Milo.
Sara calls Milo on her phone
Robotic phone voice:This phone number does not exist.
Sara:Huh? That's weird.
Sara:Candace?
Candace is waiting for Isabella to answer the phone
Candace:One second Sara.
Meanwhile... with Baljeet and Isabella
Baljeet:So, is there such thing as fireside boys?
Isabella:Sorry Baljeet, Candace is calling.
Isabella picks up
Isabella:Candace? What's wrong?
Candace:Isabella, do you know where Phineas is? I tried calling him but it said his phone number didn't even exist.
Isabella:Oh, Phineas went back in time so he could stop this catastrophe from ever happening.
Candace:Oh, that would make sense. Well then could you come and help us?
Isabella:Sure. Where are you?
Candace:Lard World.
Isabella:Yuck! What do you need help with?
Candace:Escaping. The pistachions trapped us here.
Isabella:Okay. We'll be right there.
Isabella and Candace both hang up
Isabella:Baljeet, get out the sorbet machine so we can turn back into pistachions.
Later... while Isabella and Baljeet are in Lard World
Isabella:(whispers to Baljeet) There they are.
They both walk over to the cage
Isabella:We're gonna set you guys all free!
Candace:Wait Isabella, just let me go. I have to back to the past with Phineas. He's my brother.
Melissa:Wait! Take us too.
Zack:We need to find Milo.
Isabella:But they already took the time machine.
Vanessa:There's plenty of stuff laying around at my dads', maybe we can build a time machine.
Buford:Ooh! Count me in!
Sara:Oh yeah, me too!
Dioggee:Arf!
Isabella:Ok then.
Later...The gang is sneaking to Doofenshmirtzs' apartment
They walk to the door
Isabella:(whispers to Vanessa) Is this it?
Vanessa:Yeah, I'll get the keys.
Vanessa opens the door
Vanessa:Hmmm... Looks like the coast is clear guys.
They all follow Vanessa and she stops at a closet that says "Junk Closet" on the front
Vanessa:This is where he keeps all his rare materials. He never checks it though.
Sara opens the door
Sara:Hello?
Sara’s voice echos with no answer
Everyone walks in
Sara:Everyone look around. See what you can find.
Buford:Hey dinerbell, what's dis?
Baljeet:What?
Buford:Over here!
Baljeet walks over to Buford to see a cardboard box that says "Rare materials" on it
Buford:See?
Baljeet:Cool, let's check in there.
Baljeet searches the box
Baljeet:Wow. Einsteinium, tungsten wire, and plasma resistors.
Candace:How does he not know that he has the three main items to invent a time machine?
Vanessa:Like I said, he never checks here.
Isabella:Come on guys, let's go to the museum.
Later...
Isabella:The museum is just around the corner.
Buford:Uh, guys? I think you might wanna see dis...
They all look to see that the museum is all destroyed, and that the pistachions were almost done tearing it down
Sara:Do we have to do it here?
Baljeet:I guess not exactly, but we need to stay close to the location they will return to.
Melissa:Then over there?
Melissa points somewhere
Zack:Yeah, that seems good. As long as we don't get by a giant--
A wrecking ball swooped down trying to hit them
Zack: --Wrecking ball!
The gang ducks
Pistachion 1:(controlling the wrecking ball machine) Urg! Attack those humans!
Everyone:Ahhhh!
Candace:Let's hide over there!
Pistachion 1:(whispers to himself) I see where you're going...
Buford runs over to the wrecking ball machine
Buford:BUFORD VAN STOMM!
Pistachion 1:(whispers to himself) too easy...
Buford had the wrecking ball following him, and he swerved around the machine, so the machine would be tied up in the chains from the wrecking ball, and couldn't move
Pistachion 1:Huh?
The wrecking ball machine tips over
Sara:Great job Buford, let's get started on the time machine.
A few hours later...
Isabella-(back in the human form) Alright guys, let's go back to 1955!
Candace:(with oil all over her hands) Uh, guys, can someone hand me a napkin? My hands are all covered in oil.
Isabella:We'll worry about that when we get to 1955. Okay, Melissa, Zack, Sara, Candace and I are going, and everyone else is staying behind. Got it?
Everyone:Got it.
Isabella:Okay then, 1955, here we come!
Isabella pulls the lever and they're in the time stream
Sara:So this is what the time stream looks like! But why are there so many clocks?
Candace is standing on the side of the time machine
Candace:Well, Isabella said that--
Candace slips
Candace:Ahhhh!
Candace falls of the time machine and starts falling through the time machine. She goes through time holes in the time stream and keeps falling for a long, long, long, time, screaming the whole time
Candace:Ahhhh--When will this ever stop?!?!!
Candace falls on the top of a time limousine, smashing their time antenna
Candace gets up
Candace:Huh? What happened?
Candace:Uh-oh, looks like I smashed someone's--
A pistachion falls on the roof of the car where Candace is
Candace:Antenn--Ahhhh!!!!!!
She falls off the roof and catches herself by holding onto the handle on the trunk
Dakota:(on top of the roof with a bag of clocks) I'm gonna clock this guy
Candace:Wait a minute, he's the guy who started this whole thing... I have to stop him from "Clocking" that guy or else he'll fall out of the space time continuum into 1955.
Candace:(Yells to Dakota) Hey wait!!! You're not supposed to--
Dakota "Clocks" the pistachion and he falls off the time machine
Candace slaps her forehead and sighs
Dakota gets back into the limousine
Dakota:(talking to Cavendish) I was the joker.
Cavendish:Shocking.
Candace:I have to get up there.
Candace walks up to the roof of the limousine, but then trips over the antenna and falls right in front of the front window and Cavendish and Dakota see her
Cavendish, Dakota, and Candace:Ahhhh!
Milo opens the back door
Milo:Get in!
Candace jumps off the limousine and attempts to reach the door but misses
Candace:Ahhhh!
Milo grabs her hand and pulls her up
Candace blushes
TO BE CONTINUED