2013 Universal Pictures Logo Bloopers Episode 57 Earth Me From the Earth (Season 3 Premiere)

Sam: Places everyone! Roll camera! Cue the logo!
(Universal Logo without the captions)
Sam: Uh, Scotty?
Scotty: You sent for me, Sam?
Sam: Where are the captions?
Scotty: You said "cue the logo," so I cued the logo.
Sam: Yeah, but where are the captions?
Mike: They've gone on strike.
Mary: Captions Union Local 123.
Anna: The captions want more money.
Sam: Get those captions back to work or they're fired!
Geraint: Watch it, Sam! You shouldn't be such a control freak anyway.
Sam: Yessir. Buttwipe!
Geraint: I heard that!
(The caption Universal without the earth)
Jimmy: Well, look at that!
Hank: First the earth without captions, now the captions without the earth.
Guy: The captions came back, but the earth's gone on strike! Hahahahahahahahahahahahah soi soi soi soi rofl rofl rofl rofl!
Sam: Don't steal my laugh lines, Guy!
Beulah: Chill out, Sam!
Abby: You don't own that laugh line, remember?
Sam: They're right, Sam.
Don't get upset when people use your laugh line.
Remain
calm.
Uh-oh!
Tantrum in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO DANG DANG DANG DANG CRUM CRUM CRUM CRUM!
THAT LAUGH LINE BELONGS TO ME AND ANYONE WHO STEALS IT IS A THIEF, YOU HEAR ME?
THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF!!
*BOOM!!*
Anna: Sam? Are you all right?
Sam: I'm all right, Anna. I just get so p-ed off by people stealing my laugh line.
Anna: It's nothing to get upset over. You'll have to accept it sooner or later, okay?
Sam: Okay, Anna. I'll try, but it won't be easy.
(Wild Ducks)
LH Michael: Wild Ducks.
LH Michelle: "The World is Quackers!" Hahahahahahahahahahah soi soi soi soi rofl rofl rofl rofl!
(Universal 1936)
Sam: SCOTTYYYYYYYYYYYY!!
Scotty: You bellowed, Saaaaaaaaaaaam?
Sam: This is Universal and it's not 1936, you dig?
Scotty: I'm no clock-watcher! Sheesh!
Geraint: Shush the sheesh, Scotty!
Sam: Geraint, you tell one more person to shush the sheesh and I'll sic the Sheesh Alliance on you!
Geraint: You do that, Sam, and I'll call the Shush the Sheesh Foundation!
Chris Tarrant: Oh dear, you selected the wrong answer! *SHIN KICK!* Oh, moshin!
(Wow! I Could've Had a V8)
Mike: Oh wow!
Mary: I could've had a V8!
Anna: V8, twice the size of a V4! Hahahahahahahahahahah soi soi soi soi rofl rofl rofl rofl!
Sam: Scotty, come here!
Scotty: Oh brother! Not another lecture!
Sam: Yes, another lecture. You don't seem to know what should be on the logo.
Scotty: Judas Priest, Sam! Every time you lecture me, you make me feel like a second grade kid in school!
Sam: This is the 2013 Universal logo, Scotty.
Scotty: I've got eyes, Sam! I wasn't born yesterday, you know! I don't need any lectures from you to tell me what the 2013 Universal logo looks like! Sheesh!
Geraint: Shush the sheesh!
Sam: Hello? Get me the Speaker of the House of Representatives in Washington, DC, please.
Geraint: Sam! What are you doing?
Sam: Hello? Mr. Speaker? Could you guys in Congress pass a law banning the Shush the Sheesh Foundation?
Geraint: Oh no you don't, Sam! Guy, cut the line!
Guy: Will do, Geraint!
("You're Despicable!")
Daffy Duck: You're desssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssspicable!
Sam: Hello? Hello? All right, Geraint, did you have the line cut?
Geraint: Yes, Sam. I heard you trying to get Congress to ban the Shush the Sheesh Foundation. The President would have vetoed the bill on the ground that endless sassing would have resulted.
Sam: SCOTTYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!
Scotty: SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!
Sam: I won't take any more of your sassing me! You're fired!
Scotty: Fired?
FIRED!?
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO DANGIT DANGIT DANGIT DANGIT!
MICROSOFT SAM, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO FIRE ME!
RE-HIRE ME OR I'LL KILL MYSELF AND IF YOU DENY RESPONSIBILITY YOU'D BE GUILTY OF PERJURY, YOU HEAR ME?
GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY!!
*BOOM!!*
Beulah: Scotty! Are you all right?
Scotty: I'm all right, Beulah. Why does Sam keep firing me every time I protest his control-freak attitude?
Beulah: Don't take it so hard, Scotty. I'll see if we can get Sam to re-hire you.
Scotty: Thanks, Beulah. That makes me feel a whole lot better.
Geraint: And me too!
Sam: Aha! Fraternizing with a person I'd fired! This is mutiny! Get the rope!
(Angry P-Head and Two-Headed P-Head)
Angry P-Head: You're not hanging anybody, Microsoft Sam!
Two-Headed P-Head: You bring back Radar Overseer Scotty or there will be serious consequences!
Sam: AAAAAAGGGGHHH!! Not the Angry P-Head and the Two-Headed P-Head! Send them back! Now!
Anna: Calm down, Sam. You should know better than to let parodies of logos scare you.
Sam: You're right, Anna. But it's all Radar Overseer Scotty's fault!
Scotty: I deny that, Sam!
Sam: Liar, liar, pants on fire!
Angry P-Head: Don't give us any ideas, Microsoft Sam!
Two-Headed P-Head: Radar Overseer Scotty did not coax us into coming here.
Angry P-Head: We're here on orders of the Devil and She-Devil.
Two-Headed P-Head: Since Geraint Lewis put a restriction on their appearances in his videos, they sent us to torment all of you.
Sam: I still say it's Scotty's fault, and this mutineer deserves eternal torment for it!
Scotty: You double-crosser, Sam! I am not a mutineer!
Sam: You are too a mutineer!
Scotty: I am not!
Sam: You are too!
Scotty: I am not!
Sam: You are too!
Angry P-Head: You are all equally guilty!
Two-Headed P-Head: If you don't surrender your souls, we will poop all over you!
Sam: You'll never take us alive! Never!
Anna: And don't you dare get filthy with us, you evil logo parodies!
Angry P-Head: Enough! Shall we let them have it?
Two-Headed P-Head: Let's do it! Bombs away!
(CENSORED)
[PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP PLOP]
Sam: Gugh! Not again! Eeeewww! Eeeeeewwww!
[Sam barfing]
Scotty: Look what you did to me! Eeeewww! Eeeeeewwww!
[Scotty barfing]
Beulah: Sick! Gross! Eeeewww! Eeeeeewwww!
[Beulah barfing]
Geraint: Filthmongers! Eeeewww! Eeeeeeeeeewwww!
[Geraint barfing]
Anna: How dare you evil logo parodies get filthy with us! Take that!
[Anna releasing power to the Angry P-Head and the Two-Headed P-Head]
*GIGANTIC EXPLOSION!!*
Angry P-Head: Curses! Foiled again!
Two-Headed P-Head: You win this time, but we'll be back!
(FU)
Mike: Fu?
Mary: As in Manchu?
Anna: Fu Manchu! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahah soi soi soi soi rofl rofl rofl rofl!
Sam: Who's the insubordinate that put "F-U" on the logo?
Scotty: Not me.
Jimmy: Not me.
Hank: Not me.
Guy: Not me.
Sam: Let me remind you that you're never supposed to say "F-U" to your boss.
Geraint: Probably the Angry P-Head and Two-Headed P-Head in retaliation for being beaten back.
Sam: They said "F-U" to me? Well, I say "F-U" back to them! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahah soi soi soi soi rofl rofl rofl rofl!
(PU)
LH Michael: "P-U?"
LH Michelle: That logo's becoming a real stinker! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
("That's all Folks!")
Beulah: That's all Folks?
Abby: What a short picture that was! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahah soi soi soi soi rofl rofl rofl rofl!
Scotty: Oops! Methinks I goofed again!
Sam: Youthinks right, Scotty. Let's try once more.
Geraint: Uh, not now, Sam. It's getting late. Let's pick it up there in the morning.