The Meatball is a Relic

Inconceivable! episode 27, posted April 22, 2020.
Game Show episode 129
==Panelists==
* Host: Dan Moren
* Scorekeeper: Lex Friedman
====Team 1 (Eyebrow and Bangs) ====
*Chip Sudderth (“He’s a not-Tony off the old block”)
*Quinn Rose (“We’re pretty sure she’s not the spy”) [Captain]
*Steve Lutz (“The old jackbox himself”)
====Team 2====
*Kelly Guimont (“She’s a rebel, she’s a saint”)
*Glenn Fleishman (“He tucks his pants in his boots”)
*Liz Myles (“She’ll answer what, when, where, why and especially who”) [Captain]
== Round 1 - Cryptic Cryptids ==
From the following cryptic clues, identify the cryptozoological creature.
For example: “Amphibian adores solid ground” wold be the Ohio cryptid known as the “Loveland Frog”
Clue 	Answer 	Contestant	Points awarded
Jail horrific law-man Elliot 	Loch Ness Monster 	Chip 	10
Captain Harkness get married in a hurry	Jackelope 	Kelly 	10
Demon in a sports uniform 	Jersey Devil 	Quinn 	10
Let Pooh and Baloo fall 	Drop bears 	Glenn 	1
Shutting down any lip 	Sasquatch 	Steve 	10
44th president supports Frosty 	Abominable Snowman	Liz 	10
=== Standings ===
* Team 1 (Eyebrow and Bangs): 30
* Team 2 (No Hair Comment): 21
== Round 2 - Fake Off ==
(Word suggested by listener Chris)
Given a word from a work of speculative fiction (TV, movies, comics etc.) find the correct answer from the three definitions given.
Team 1 answers
Category: Fictional Drugs
Points wagered: 6
Points lost: 6
Word: Dantine
Reader	Definition 	Correct Answer	Chosen Answer
Kelly 	Dantine is a distance that may sound familiar to you because it’s from the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy radio series. It’s listed as one of the ingredients of the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster. 	 	
Glenn 	Dantine is the secretion of a reptile required for magical transformation in the third of the Earthsea books. This reptile is inconveniently located high up on a mountain that’s effectively unscaleable. Not many people know about it so it’s a secret secretion.	 	X
Liz 	Dantine is in fact truly and properly a word that sounds a little bit like Dante. And what did Dante write? A book. So if you have Dantine this fictional drug thing and you have a little bit of that it convinces you that you too wrote The Devine Comedy 	X 	
=== Standings ===
* Team 1 (Eyebrow and Bangs): 24
* Team 2 (No Hair Comment): 21
== Round 3 - Last Words ==
For five points identify the TV show from its final line. For another five day who spoke them.
Final line 	TV Show 	Speaker 	Contestant	Points awarded
So five card stud, nothing wild and the sky’s the limit. 	Star Trek: The Next Generation	Captain Picard 	Kelly 	10
I once walked into a brothel with a honeycomb and a jackass. The madam says…	Game of Thrones 	Tyrion Lannister	Chip 	0
We’ve been waiting for you. 	Lost 	John Locke 	Glenn 	5
What are we going to do now? 	Buffy the Vampire Slayer 	Dawn Summers 	Quinn 	10
For endings, as it is known, are where we begin. 	Pushing Daisies 	The Narrator 	Liz 	0
Well, here I am. 	Firefly 	Jubal Early 	Steve 	6
=== Standings ===
* Team 1 (Eyebrow and Bangs): 40
* Team 2 (No Hair Comment): 36
== Round 4 - Fake Off: Rise of the Skyfaker ==
Team 2 answers
Category: Magical Devices
Points wagered: 10
Points won: 10
Word: Rose Jar
Reader	Definition 	Correct Answer	Chosen Answer
Chip 	A Rose Jar is a deceptively gently named chaos arrogant from Warhammer. It resurrects a fallen soldier on the field as a mindless zombie by destroying five other soldiers. So it’s great if your soldier is in the right place but it’s not a great trade otherwise.	 	
Quinn 	A rose jar is actually a container that is covered in etched gold rose drawings that was used to hold a genie captive in the Sons of Sand series 	 	
Steve 	A rose jar is a magical glass container that is used to trap and store a ghost. From the Rivers of London series. 	X 	X
=== Standings ===
* Team 1 (Eyebrow and Bangs): 40
* Team 2 (No Hair Comment): 46
== Round 5 - Disney’s Movie Mash-Ups ==
An animated Disney movie has been mashed up with a non-Disney movie. From the following jumbled plot provide the combined title.
For example: “Teen music store employees set out in a massive submarine to find an ancient island kingdom” would be “Atlantis: the lost Empire Records”
Plot 	Combined Title 	Contestant	Points awarded
In a midlife crisis an advertising executive becomes infatuated with the victim of a monstrous curse. 	American Beauty and the Beast 	Chip 	10
A pair of streetwise basketball players try to hustle a young woman and her vertically challenged friends 	Snow White Men Can’t Jump (and the Seven Dwarfs)	Kelly 	10
Condemned to marry a prince she detests, a young woman attempts to help an amphibian and finds herself transformed. 	Princess Bride and the Frog 	Quinn 	10
A young prince is banished after the death of his father, but still has to go to Christmas with his disfunctional royal family. 	The Lion King in Winter 	Glenn 	5
In a series of vignettes we follow criminals, murderers and a young woman who lost her shoe. 	Cinderella City 	Steve 	10
A conman working at a credit card company uses the cards of dead people to help a young woman on her quest to find and return an ancient relic.	Moana Money 	Liz 	0
=== Final Standings ===
* Team 1 (Eyebrow and Bangs): 70
* Team 2 (No Hair Comment): 61
* Lex: 2