Philosopher appointed Leader of F.A.C.T. (CCU)

The Chairman of the Coalition of Conservative Unionists (CCU), Daniel Malan MP, has appointed Roland Barthes as his Associate Chairman for Campaign Strategy. Barthes, who has no previous political experience and is not an MP, resigned as a Lecturing Professor of Philosophy and Ethics at the University of Nonambar. A native Balbish-speaker, Barthes can speak eight languages and hist studies focused around anthropology and post-structuralism. When questioned about his decision, D. F. Malan said the appointment was a sign "of what is to come". Some political journalists have called this out ad 'populism' but Malan sharply rejected that saying, "the danger with populism is that it's whole aim and purpose is to cause division and hate", adding "the Conservatives do not believe in that, not in the slightest".
In his first interview outside of University-Life, Ronald Barthes spokes to several reporters in his new office. Here's what he had to say.
"I'm not a politician. Gods, I'm really not. I can think of nothing worse. What I am, is what I am. And I do believe I am a campaigner. I have taken on this role not for the political fortune, but to help campaign and to deliver a message a really believe in. And that message is really quite simple: a fairer Falleentium is not one of a grand-big state. For crying out loud, we're in the mess we are in because of the State. The solution is to create a Falleentium where people have control over their lives. But, look, I don't want to get into this too much. There's going to be plenty of time for that. Here's what is important, though. When I took this job and made something quite clear. I would be damned if I were going to participate in politics. That means, I am not going to be standing on a balcony, or a stage, or a podium, giving a speech. Nah, that's not me. You won't see me running from room to room wearing overly large pins and plastic with an elegant suit. Because that is not who I am. Nor what I believe campaigning is about. I'll wear what I so desire, and say as I so please. Where I see wrong, I am going to right it. There's nothing more to say about that, really. Wouldn't you agree it's such a simple theory: right the wrongs. Philosophy, huh."
Since taking up his new role, Barthes has adjusted the Code of Conduct for campaigning. His new rules are:- Do not wear suits, or high attire, unless attending public events, the television or other suitable occasions. No one cares about suits - we're not running a business.- Do not fake smile. Smile, or don't bother at all.- If you can't be bothered to do something, leave.- Every Sunday shall be a new theme of campaign. It's all just a temporary theme.- Get out there and talk to the people. TALK, TALK, TALK.
Category:The Imperial Constitution