Cruel Mike's Thesis

Cruel Mike's Thesis is the thirteenth episode of Classic Sam Videos overall, the thirteenth episode of Arc 1: A Rogue God, and the fifteenth video to premiere on the ClassicSamVideos channel. This is also the first video to reach the double digits in length.
== Characters ==
* Microsoft Sam
* Microsoft Mike
* Microsoft Mary
* Mr. Afterlife
* Mr. B (errors)
== Items ==
* Doom-shroom
* Windows
* Errors
* ROFL-47 Machine Gun
== Places ==
* Windows Private Island
* Retcon Room
== YouTube Description ==
You really thought I was gonna go on another long hiatus, eh? Well, worry no further, as a new episode has arrived, and it's the longest to date! Watch as Mr. Afterlife makes his move, things get hopeless for Sam, and a plot twist arrives...
== Lore Description ==
On this day, October 5th, Sam finally has the motivation to continue AWE again with Episode 9, but then Mr. Afterlife confronts him. He explains to Sam how he was revived, and how Mike set that rule in place. He also says that he has always disliked Sam because of his personality, and how he’s crazy enough to betray the creator of the world that he lives in. Sam is confused as to why Mr. Afterlife keeps referring to Mike as the creator, because Mr. Afterlife is the one who’s the god. Whether Sam believes it or not, Mr. Afterlife is ready to send him to the Retcon Room, but not before recounting the events that caused Sam to be apathetic to Mike and Mary’s existence. Of course, he leaves out the part where he was the one who caused this event to happen, because no one needs to know this yet.
As soon as the flashback ends, Mike and Mary use the Doom-shroom to blow a hole through the steel wall, and enter Sam’s room in the mansion. Sam curses Crazy Dave’s name, and Mr. Afterlife asks Mike’s permission to strike Sam down. Admittedly, he is a bit worried of Mike’s answer, but luckily, Mike says yes. It seems that Mr. Afterlife being alive is causing an unexpected change of plans for Mike, too. Sam refuses to go down without a fight, and he proposes a deal. The winner gets to rule the universe, and the loser stays in the Retcon Room for all of eternity. They both get into a Super Smash Bros. simulation, which sometimes happens in other TTS universes. In this particular fight, each fighter only has 1 life, with Mr. Afterlife winning the battle by a landslide.
But then, in the last moments of the simulation, Mr. Afterlife accidentally touches a red Mini Mushroom and gets shrunken down. The effects carry over to real life, so this gives Sam a fighting chance with the ROFL-47 Machine Gun. However, since Mr. Afterlife is so small, he easily dodges all of his bullets. Sam is about to shoot more when he realizes that he is out of ammo, just in time for Mr. A to be back to normal size. Sam is now learning the hard way that he doesn’t have the Orb of Light at his disposal anymore, so he is easily sent to the Retcon Room, seemingly once and for all. Sam manages to find a spare computer in the Retcon Room to do Episode 9 on, and the computer is edited as usual.
Error 1: Windows 11 welcomes Sam to the Retcon Room, and he is going to stay in 11 since Windows does not think he deserves XP.
Error 2: Windows warns Sam that the processor will explode if he doesn’t close his abundance of programs. Sam assures them that they all have a purpose, just like the image of a potato, which gives Sam good luck.
Error 3: Windows wants to remove the mouth icon from its database due to it looking too much like a cartoonish stereotype of a black person’s mouth.
Error 4: Mr. B has received an error request or two on his Discord account, and wants to share them to Sam.
Error 5: Windows says that only one kilobyte of data can be used in the computer. Sam rages hardcore at this.
Error 6: Sam receives a message from a Microsoft Sam of another TTS universe, asking if he wants to visit. Sam can’t really wrap his head around the fact that other TTS universes exist as actual universes that can be visited. Sam decides not to reply right now.
Error 7: Mr. B finds out that a guy on YouTube known as DefenderMan505 made a fanmade intro for the channel, and relays the news to Sam. They both approve of the simplistic intro.
Error 8: Sam has made more mistakes than his share, so what is he gonna do about it? Troll Windows by showing them one of the most infamous videos from Birdie Drama ever made. He claims that it is part of his secret stash of Shm3xy Pr0nz, when really, it’s from his Birdie Drama folder. He only said such a thing due to the nature of that video.
Error 9: We all love to praise Jesus Christ in the most wholesome way possible. It should be noted that while Jesus is a citizen of this universe, there are multiple versions of him across the multiverse just like Microsoft Sam, including one that is praised in a religion known as Christianity.
Error 10: Mr. B remembers that Sam put the Killing Machine in the Retcon Room, and he realizes that he can use it to get out, because the sheer force of that can bust the door open and take down anything that blocks the door. Sam then prepares to get revenge on the last three main assholes of the old episodes.
Meanwhile on the island, Mike mulls over the fact that Sam banished the Killing Machine to the Retcon Room. He knows that Sam can use it to break out, even if the door is locked, so he indirectly asks Mr. Afterlife if there’s no way to escape. Mr. Afterlife lies, saying that he put a huge wall of titanium against the door. He quickly moves on from the subject to finally reveal that he was the one who switched the clothes around and caused this chain reaction. Utter shock and anger pass through Mike and Mary…
== Director's Commentary ==
NOTE: After all the lore revamps on the document are done, I am going to actually tend to this wiki the way I should've done in the beginning. I'm also going to remake the director's commentary bits. So, as a little disclaimer, the following isn't the final version and may even contain outdated information in some cases.
Why was the episode title named like this if it's about Mr. Afterlife and not Mike himself? Well, Mr. Afterlife's first name IS Mike, or Michael, as seen in the SSF2 fight. Anyways, these last two episodes of Arc 1 are one of those times where I had the most fun making CSV episodes. It genuinely felt good doing the storyline bits, and the craziest part is that I didn't feel like I needed scripts or anything. In fact, I didn't start doing scripted stuff until Arc 3! Well, with the way that the storyline and lore keeps evolving, I kinda have to do that, you know? The thing is, I love doing unscripted stuff with these TTS videos, and I still do that for the errors and other segments like that. As for story bits, if I feel more comfortable with either one, I will do it. That's the only way to quench my silly fear that CSV will start to feel more like a job than a hobby.
Anyways, let's go over the story choices. Oh yeah, before I do, Sam's first line when he saw that Mr. Afterlife came back was actually from Mochirisu, and I first heard that line from Microsoft Sam Reads Funny Windows Error Messages: Season 4 Episode 8 (Part 2). Alright, so I made up the story that Mr. Afterlife always hated Sam because of his personality, which does make a lot of sense, as you know. But I also had to make the excuse for why Sam finally decided that his friends were expendable, and I decided to make the flashback scene. I wanted to do something actually interesting with the "Mike talks like a lady" joke. What's more interesting is that Sam says "I wish I know who did this." I think I was actually intending for there to be a twist, even at this point. Oh yeah, remember when I said that I didn't want to make Sam rage about his burritos? Well, I went back on that for this episode, but it still isn't as generic as what people usually did with the taco joke. Also, even though Sam was being paranoid about Mike and Mary entering his mansion last episode, he was about ready to get over it on this day, October 5th. Mr. Afterlife's confrontation is also how Sam found out that Mike created the universe instead of this godhead.
And of course I had to let Mike and Mary in on this episode, so that the gang is briefly back together. I like how I just made Sam rage against Crazy Dave so ballistically lol. Oh yeah, and this is the first episode where the Retcon Room is officially established as a location. I was thinking of how the Killing Machine got retconned, so I made it a real place. And if you've seen lore concepts, you would know that originally, the old design of Microsoft Sam would have existed as a separate entity in that location! I'm glad I thought about it further and scrapped it, because that's not as interesting as what I ended up doing. Oh, right, the plot hole. So, I genuinely didn't catch that they're not supposed to have their stick figure designs yet, because I was having too much fun making this episode up. Fun fact, I thought up of Mr. B being a character when I was first writing the lore document, but I still didn't think of or remember this plot hole. Even when I made up the idea that Agony changes forms based on the circumstances, I did not remember it. It's only until I was writing these commentaries. That's friggin' insane to me, that I keep fixing my own lore without even knowing. Wow!
So, there's a bit of a story of how I wanted to use Super Smash Flash 2 for fight scenes. If you've watched GWizard777, you would know that he used Super Smash Bros. games for fight scenes in Seasons 10 and 11, but believe it or not, that's not where I drew inspiration from. You see, MarioMario54321 was one of the first YouTubers that I ever watched, and he often used Super Smash Bros. for fight scenes. Sometime later, I discovered Super Smash Flash 1, and then Super Smash Flash 2 down the line. I still find the latter game REALLY cool, and that it managed to survive the Flash deprecation along with a lot of other games. You know, in September 2016, my first ever YouTube account was about making videos on Super Smash Flash 2, the channel aptly named "SSF2Bloopers." Yup, I was one of the few who actually thought to give that game the "blooper" treatment, just like what happened with Super Mario 64. I was inspired by that, after all. Literally the first video I made was like that, and it was called "Mario VS Wario". This was inspired by MM54321's Mario VS Oiram, although I did see people making videos about Mario fighting Wario as well, so on some part, I was inspired by that, too. Those videos of mine are long gone, unfortunately, due to how I had an impulse of deleting stuff if I feel like starting over and simply didn't want them up. Now, no matter what, I'm not deleting any video of mine, because I have grown out of that mindset since 2022.
Oh yeah, and there's also a story for why it's version 0.9b. You see, I was trying to download the version that had the old Mario sprite, because I have nostalgia for that in particular. But, I eventually figured out that it's in Version 0.8, and I decided to use 0.9b anyway since I already downloaded it. This is also the first and only time that I used the actual game audio, because for the other times moving forward, it felt too awkward to do it. And I went the extra mile and added names to the fighter images so that you can tell who's who. I definitely wasn't intending for Mr. Afterlife to be shrunken down, but it actually happened in-game by chance, so I made it part of the story. This is the first and currently only time that something in SSF2 actually affects the actual persons. This is interesting, as it actually gave Sam a fighting chance, but he just so happens to run out of bullets due to Mr. Afterlife being an expert at dodging lol. And then, to no one's surprise, Sam gets banished. That's what he gets for trading the Killing Machine for something that would only get plentiful ammo if he still had the Orb of Light! Now, let's go over the errors.
Error 1: So I brought Windows 11 for this one since this is the Retcon Room, and this is supposed to be a punishment. Basically, anyone and anything who goes in the Retcon Room is supposed to stay there indefinitely, and have a boring existence. It's basically like the Afterlife, where you can't die. Not much else to say about this other than Sam getting mad that he lost again.
Error 2: I either came up with this myself, or I was inspired. Not sure which anymore. I still really like Sam's response! It's pretty clever.
Error 3: Now, you may think this scene was made to poke fun at the "SJWs" or whatever, but it really wasn't. Sam does have a point, though, but I still think the last sentence he said is funny.
Error 4: Yeah, I wanted to formally introduce the concept of error requests since I ended up getting one. Oh yeah, let me explain something. During this time, I already made an alt account on Discord that’s specifically for this channel, separate to the one I already had for the Zushi Films channel. I made them both act like different people; ZF was the nice and rational one, while CSV was the edgy one. This is after the second phase of the NSFW drama ended, where me and Zack made a compromise. I guess I wanted to prove that I had what it took to “fit in” to Zack’s community vibe while also not making ZF go out of character. Looking back, this was the best worst decision I ever made, because it caused more drama later on, but it also helped me be on my way to being a hermit on the Internet. I will go over that when it becomes more relevant, because it surprisingly does.
Oh yeah, and the reason I got an error request is because I most likely asked for them. I even put my username on this error so people could send me more. You can still do that if you want; I just need to accept the friend request. Though I prefer if people write down their requests in the comments, just like with that one episode of AWE Season 3 with that error request. Fun fact, Video #4 of this entire channel was just me asking for error requests, as I was anticipating fans back then, I guess. Finally, there still won’t be a CSV server. At least for a while. Once I feel like it and there’s a sizable fan base that can realistically call for a server, I will do so, and that will be the third way to send requests. Or you can send them to me via the wiki right now? I don’t know, but it would be cool if that happened.
Error 5: Yeah, the error requests count for the error quota, because why not? Eyad, also known as Gacha Eyad Life on YouTube, was an old acquaintance from Zack’s community. He was a pretty good guy. As for this error, it’s okay, I guess. Kind of a generic error you would swear you already saw before from another TTS channel. Oh yeah, the way Sam rages here, and the scene where he curses Crazy Dave, was directly inspired by the way Sam raged in GWizard777’s series. You could tell because of him mentioning the Sears Tower, which was an old TTSC joke in of itself.
Error 6: Yeah… I sent an error request to myself. Go figure lol. Thunderbirds501 did the same thing with his alts, so I wasn’t the only one either! As for if the crossover will happen? I don’t think so. I don’t really like the Funny Earthly Signs series anyway. I pretty much forced the group project I was in to have a TTS series, and it feels really uninspired now. The references to the other series in the project feels forced, too. I was actually planning on having CSV be a part of this, which is why this error exists. But now, this “Simulation 14.0” is just an alternate universe in the multiversal void, as far as CSV terms go.
Error 7: DefenderMan505’s video is actually the reason I decided to stop the brief hiatus and finish the arc! I’m still surprised it happened lol. And I showed the intro itself for good measure. Wanna know a funny thing? I didn’t notice that there was a typo in “simplicity” until way later.
Error 8: Ah yes…this scene. This was around the time when I was revisiting the birdie stuff, which I have witnessed since 2017. Fun fact, the first time I ever saw a birdie video was when I was watching one of RubberDuckula’s cringe compilations (oh man, remember those?), which showed his old Hot Milk animation meme, I believe. Oh man, times have changed since then. I know way too much about birdie drama lore, even though I was an onlooker. Here, I decided to add birdie’s “teen ants” video as a joke, which was made in either 2019 or 2020. Yeah, this is a video that exists, unfortunately, even though this was about a Gorillaz AU, hence the Gorillaz music. I believe it was intended to be one of birdie’s jokes, but I can tell you for sure that birdie’s haters did NOT like this video, and to be honest, neither do I. This was part of a horrible era that people are glad is over.
Anyways, yes, the Homework Folder has been renamed to Shm3xy Pr0nz at this point, which is an old thing from the TTSC as well. But the teen ants video is not actually a part of it; Sam just jokingly said it was, even though he probably shouldn’t have. That was the entire video anyway, and it would make no sense if it was there. The folder actually contains explicit gay porn, which is what Mike alludes to in the S1 Finale, so that’s also why I say this.
Error 9: This was based off of a joke from when people prank called the Jesus Chatline. I still like the title of this error lol. Also, what does “gempilled” mean? Well, the term “gem” is actually from the Sharty; the soyjak image board I mentioned before. It means that something is good or based. I decided to steal it lol
Error 10: I realized before that the Killing Machine is in the Retcon Room, so he can use it to get out of here, further progressing the story and helping me write the S1 Finale.
Why does Mike ask if Sam can escape if he most likely knows that the door is locked? Well, he must’ve known that the Killing Machine is there with Sam, which is why Mr. Afterlife says that he blocked the door with titanium. And then comes the twist that is arguably the final nail on the coffin for the classic era of CSV. The funny thing is, I don’t think I even knew for sure the details of Mr. Afterlife’s plan, yet I went along with it anyway. Good thing the choices in the past episodes helped solve this puzzle once and for all! And yeah, I used that one piece of audio from Khonjin House Season 5 because I thought it would fit well, and it really does! That’s all I really have to say.