Advice No One Asked For - Number Five/Transcript

Advice No One Asked For - Number Five is the fifth episode of Buckley's "Advice No One Asked For" series.  It is currently only available on his website, in the "Supplements" section.  
Description (as seen on the website): In this edition of "Advice No One Asked For", I help a woman who's not sure what the ethical thing to do with some juicy information.
==Transcript==
(introduction music played during the following paragraph)
Welcome to "Advice No One Asked For".  You know the drill by now, and if you don't, go back and listen to the other ones.  This is the segment where I, Buckley, a man who has no qualifications in giving advice to anyone, dispenses it anyway to someone who didn't even ask me the question in the first place.  Today's question comes from someone who faces a moral dilemma. 
Dear anyone but Buckley,
I live in a small town, but went into a nearby city to catch up with some old friends.  We went for dinner in a fancy restaurant to celebrate a special occasion, and I caught my husband's best friend's wife cheating on him!  She had removed her wedding ring, and was all over another guy.  She begged me not to tell anyone, saying it was a "one time thing".  I didn't, and now I feel guilty.  Now, she's denying it was anything, and says if I tell anyone, it will be her word against mine.  What should I do?
Signed...let's just call her, "Nosy in Northern Ontario".
Well Nosy, clearly you haven't been to the city in a while - didn't you get the memo?  Oh, probably not, due to the lack of email and whatever shanty town you're originally from, but infidelities are all the rage down there to the city folks!  I mean, as if having relations outside the family weren't bad enough, them goddamn smogbreathers are breaking their wedding vows, and that ain't right!  Also, although they do serve roast beef, Arby's is not that fancy of a restaurant.  No, no, but seriously, so you catch this leathery slut climbing over some guy's dick that's not your husband's best friend's, she freaks out, begs you not to say anything, claims it was a one time thing - which is obviously bullshit or she wouldn't be begging you not to tell anyone, or telling you it's her word against yours - and...you didn't blackmail the absolute shit out of her?  Fuck, I'd have this old skank mowing my lawn for a goddamn year if I had this kind of dirt on them.  Does she have anything nice you'd want?  Maybe she can come drive you back and forth from the sticks so you can do some shopping in a mall, or, as you might call them, "stores inside an even bigger store", you know, get her to carry your stuff, get you some jewelry -- you know, take full advantage of this woman!  That's my advice because she's obviously bluffing when she says it's "your word against hers" - she knows you'd win.  After all, everyone knows that the only lying small town folk do is with their cousins. 
(introductory music playing)
I'm Buckley, and you're welcome.