Hoopla's Fantastic Cult

This is the 36th episode of Hoopla's Fantastic Beach, and the 8th episode of season 3. It is a crossover with the series Cult of Squid.
== Transcript ==
(Episode opens with Squidward, Noseward, Doctor Crayons, Security, SpongeBob, and Mr. Krabs still at Doctor Markers’ base after beating him)
Crayons: Okay so I think I’ve got this whole dimensional transportation machine working. I’m not sure what my rival’s intentions were when building it, but I know we can use it against Project Phoenix. 
Noseward: Yeah there’s gotta be a parallel universe with crazy futuristic technology right?
Crayons: Probably. Anyways Eugene, can you pass me the batteries?
Mr. Krabs: Yeah sure.
(Krabs hands Crayons a few batteries which he throws into a slot close to a button labeled “PRESS ME”)
Crayons: Hey guys if this actually works, I think we have a solid chance at stopping Project Phoenix before they get too powerful. 
Squidward: That’s for sure. We can’t let them keep forcing people to do their bidding.
Crayons: Markers would have agreed either way, him and his war machine plans. 
Squidward: So are we ready to see another universe? Hey wait would that whole universe where our lives were a TV show count as an alternate universe?
Crayons: It sure would. A weird universe at that, it makes me uncomfortable that people get entertainment out of watching our lives. 
Squidward: Let’s do this!
(Crayons hits a green button and flips a lever, then presses the PRESS ME button; cut to Hoopla travelling through the wormhole.)
Hoopla: Well, I’m impressed that I fixed that magical dimension so quickly that Iris and Bloxyl didn’t have enough time to choose the next one. Although if they thought I was gonna take long, does that mean they think I’m not very good at this job...nah. Time to wait.
(Hoopla checks his dimension-checker when he gets a call from Bloxyl.)
Bloxyl: Okay, this one’s a bit weird, and a bit insane, but I think it’s a fun dimension. So let me just transport you to it-
(Suddenly, the wormhole cracks and shakes)
Bloxyl: What the?
Hoopla: I’m getting a feeling...a certain feeling...that maybe...something’s gone wrong.
Bloxyl: Well yeah, but I can’t figure out what it is!
(Another path forms in the wormhole, sucking Hoopla to it.)
Hoopla: AHH! IT’S PULLING ME!
Bloxyl: What’s pulling you? (the screen glitches out) H-H-Hoopla, c-c-an you read meeeeeeeeee (the screen goes dark)
Hoopla: Why can’t I just enjoy a relaxing life?
(Hoopla is sucked completely into the second wormhole, and the screen goes black.)
(The screen fades back into Hoopla walking out of the portal into a mysterious dimension, and the portal closes soon after he walks out)
Hoopla: Uh oh, that's not good. 
(The COS Characters are staring at Hoopla.)
Hoopla: Welp, this is weird.
Squidward: Who's this weirdo? Some kind of green bean fish?
Hoopla: My name is Hoopla!
Squidward: Well okay then. Hello, um… Hoopla.
Crayons: Looks like you appeared out of my interdimensional portal. What's your dimension like?
Hoopla: Uhh… a beach?
Crayons: So it’s just an entire beach. 
Hoopla: Well, no, there’s like, a world, and stuff. You guys know what a world is right?
Noseward: Crayons! What happened?! This isn’t my futuristic tech! And now the portal is broken so not like I can ever get it.
Hoopla: Well uh you see I'm supposed to be fixing dimensions and stuff and then another wormhole appeared and sucked me in.
Squidward: Makes total sense. We've seen weirder stuff at this point. (whispers) Satan.
Hoopla: I know that guy! Always beats me at Uno, I hate it!
Crayons: Wait what-
Squidward: Hey wait a minute I recognize you! Your doppelgänger was one of the first prisoners of our invasion. 
Security: Alternate timeline I'm assuming?
Squidward: Yeah. He was oddly calm during his execution. 
Hoopla: Might have something to do with how often I die. It's literally become a joke at this point.
Crayons: Oh heavens, I think we have found an immortal being!
Bob: I am Bob, and I make burgers.
SpongeBob: What a coincidence! I am SpongeBob, and I make burgers!
Bob: Hm.
Security: Wait where did you come from?
(Bob suddenly glitches out and starts turning into a static monster)
Squidward: WOAH! That was scary!
Noseward: I’m gonna go touch my eyes.
Crayons: Oh Neptune I was afraid this would happen!
Squidward: Afraid of a glitchy mess?
Crayons: Yes! This is a big deal, you know!
Squidward: I was never good with computers.
SpongeBob: So what the heck is that thing?
Crayons: Well when I was running the numbers to finish the machine I did come across some math that said hypothetically, a cross-dimensional monster with unfathomable power could accidentally be created due to random quantum fluctuations and the process of splitting elementary particles to create temporal wormholes between dimensions. Henceforth we have here a cross-dimensional monster that has no idea what it is or why it exists, it’s just a mess of atoms trying to understand itself and it could wreak havoc if it isn’t contained now.
(Everyone stares blankly at Doctor Crayons)
Crayons: What? You guys do remember before the invasion I majored in quantum physics, right?
Noseward: Nerd.
Hoopla: Ehhh, I think I get it. I’ve been spending a lot of time next to people that talk about dimensional stuff, at some point you understand it.
Crayons: Okay, thank Neptune. Anyways, we can’t stop that thing. Well we can, but it’ll be difficult.
Squidward: So what’s your plan now?
Crayons: RUN!
Glitch Monster: Get back here! 
(The Glitch Monster is able to grab Security)
Security: Ah, well, I’ll just stay here I guess.
(Everyone runs up a flight of steps that collapses behind them as the glitched out monster starts growing in size)
Squidward: Hey we faced down Satan himself, how bad can this thing be?
Crayons: Well given the fact that it’s drawing its energy from a place in the fourth dimension far beyond anything our multiverse can comprehend, I’d say pretty bad. And I’m assuming it’s using it’s “glitch power” to glitch us, weakening our power, meaning we aren’t as strong as we usually are.
Squidward: For Neptune’s sake can you just talk normally?
Crayons: Affirmative.
Hoopla: I got a plan. What if we just hide, in a broom closet, for the rest of our lives.
Crayons: Well considering I just met you and know nothing about you, trusting that plan would be a terrible idea.
Hoopla: But I could tell you more about my world and my friends in a closet.
Crayons: Tell us later. For now, we keep running.
Hoopla: But where do we run to?
Mr. Krabs: To the Krusty Krab, it’s one of the few places that Project Phoenix doesn’t have under constant surveillance.
Hoopla: Project what now?
Squidward: We’ll have to explain later when we get to the Krusty Krab.
Hoopla: Sounds good.
(Cut to everyone reaching the Krusty Krab)
Noseward: Crayons you have to fix that portal so we can send Hoopla home!
Crayons: I know. I know I know I know. 
Noseward: So what are you waiting for?
Crayons: That place is taken over by the monster I accidentally created. We can’t exactly go back right away!
Noseward: So how do we take care of this monster?
Crayons: Frankly I have no idea.
Hoopla: Should we stay here for a little bit while we think of some sort of plan?
Noseward: I guess we could do that.
Hoopla: So what’s this Project Phoenix you guys were talking about earlier?
Crayons: Well, basically, it’s an evil corporation that’s slowly taking over Bikini Bottom. Not much else we can tell you.
Hoopla: I see. That sucks. Glad I’ll never have to deal with evil people taking over my home. Alpooh doesn’t count. Neither does the Oobglo. Well, at least it’ll never happen again.
Crayons: Something tells me it will.
Hoopla: NO IT WON’T, TRUST ME!
Noseward: Since we’re already talking about your home, I’d like to know more about it.
Hoopla: Alright, so do you want the short story or the long story? The short story is short and the long story will tell you everything that has ever happened on the beach.
Squidward: Let’s play safe and go with the short story, we might not have enough time.
Hoopla: Aww, but I wanted to tell the long story. Oh well, here goes. So I have these friends, one is called Boopla, he’s like me but blue.
Noseward: How original.
Hoopla: Yeah, I know. Anyway, the other is called Carl, and he’s a green fish too. Except he doesn’t go HOOPLA like I do. This evil doppelganger I have named Alpooh who’s red and stuff tried to take over the beach with hypnosis. We had to hold a whole musical to get people out of his control. There were also these aliens called Oobglo who wanted to kill us because of the musical we held. And then some Wormy effect happened, and I got hired by these weird beings called Iris and Bloxyl to fix a bunch of dimensions to fix it. And there’s this shadow inside of me now. And that’s where we are now. Pretty cool, huh?
Noseward: Oh thank god you stopped. Oh my god, that was- ugh, (passes out)
Squidward: He couldn’t handle all the information.
Hoopla: Also Crayons, I think you’d like to know that there’s a scientist in my world too. He’s called Doclement.
Crayons: What an...odd name.
Hoopla: He’s like a dog on 2 legs.
Crayons: I guess he must have done some strange experiment to get under the sea then.
Hoopla: I don’t really think about it. Anyway, that’s my world.
Noseward: (waking up) I am so glad I’m not going there. And so glad you’re going away.
Crayons: Yes, this entire conversation is wasting time from what we should be doing, figuring out a way to stop that monster and get to the portal.
Hoopla: Before we start planning, I just wanna know, you guys won’t like, invade my dimension or anything right? I mean with all the cult imagery and stuff, it seems like the sorta thing you would do.
Squidward: Nah, we’re all good.
Noseward: Your dimension is too boring anyway.
Hoopla: Well that’s a relief. I thought you would go around saying a stupid chant while taking it over. Not that any chants you do have are stupid, it’s just hypotheical.
Squidward: We don’t really do chants, so we wouldn’t go around saying the beach is ours or something.
Hoopla: Yeah, that’s stupid.
Noseward: Even me, a nose, could think of a better phrase than that, Squidward.
Squidward: It was just to make a point, I wasn’t actually trying to put effort in it.
Noseward: Oh, yeah, I uh, I knew that.
Crayons: Can we actually get on task here, guys? We need to stop the glitchy monster before it does something horrific.
SpongeBob: Finally, Mr. Krabs and I have been waiting for you guys to finish. We’ve been playing rock paper scissors.
Mr. Krabs: I won, 67-42! Yes, we kept count.
Crayons: So, does anyone have any ideas on how to defeat this monster?
Hoopla: Well do we have any weapons we could use?
Crayons: Not too many, but hopefully it’s enough to do something.
Hoopla: I see. Well, not to brag or anything, but I am so strong I could probably defeat the monster on my own.
Squidward: You know, I sort of doubt that.
Crayons: Well, I have an idea! 
SpongeBob: Well, what is it?
Crayons: Hoopla, you said that your entire dimension is a beach, right?
Hoopla: Yes that is something I said. Why? 
Crayons: Well what if we use this convenient hologram device I have to trick it into drowning itself?
Hoopla: That would work. Hey while we’re waiting here why don’t you guys give me the short story of how you got to dimension opening?
Squidward: Why?
Hoopla: Okay good point. So how do we get it away from the base?
Crayons: We need a diversion. 
Squidward: What if we just shoot a flare off a few hundred yards away?
Crayons: Not a bad idea, but who’s shooting the flare?
SpongeBob: I can, I think I remember the spot we tunneled into Markers’ base. I can just hide out in a tunnel after I set off the flare.
Squidward: Good plan. So when we cross into your dimension Hoopla is there anything we should know?
Crayons: Yeah mostly regarding the side effects of interdimensional travel. 
Hoopla: Hm well you should meet my friends while you’re there. And buy some of Boopla’s records. Although they cost your souls. That’s about it.
Squidward: I think we’re going to stay far away from this “Boopla” fella.
Hoopla: Man, I haven’t seen my dimension in so long! I can’t wait to see everyone again. I’m pretty sure time passes the same across all dimensions, I am not falling into the “you go home and you realize thousands of years have passed” trope.
Squidward: Oh okay good. Wait Crayons what are the chances of that happening?
Crayons: Uhhhhhh. Wait let me run some numbers. 
(Crayons pulls out a calculator and a sticky note)
Crayons: There’s a 9 in 10 chance that 250 generations have passed since Hoopla left his home dimension.
Hoopla: Amazing! Fantastic!
Crayons: Any other questions before we go kill this cross dimensional abomination?
Squidward: Yeah. What if our weapons don't work against it?
Crayons: Honestly I didn't plan that far. Let's just play by ear. Let's go!
(The group heads over to Markers’ base and see the glitch monster coming up the stairs to the door in the ground)
Crayons: Well this is either going to be super easy or-
(The glitch monster jumps up onto the surface and grabs a tree)
Glitch Monster: GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!
Squidward: What?
Glitch Monster: YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!
Crayons: I think that-actually I have no idea what it’s doing. Hoopla, you seem smart, have you got anything?
Hoopla: Hey wait so is there life above water in this dimension?
Security: We’re doomed.
SpongeBob: Well how powerful is that monster thing?
(The glitch monster rips the door off its hinges and launches it at SpongeBob, hitting him and sending him flying multiple yards backwards)
Glitch Monster: Hasta la vista, baby.
Crayons: Oh dear.
Hoopla: I think this glitch monster is glitched. It’s saying lines from movies for no reason.
Glitch Monster: Luke, I am your father.
Hoopla: AND IT’S AN IDIOT! Everyone knows the line is “No, I am your father”.
Squidward: So we’re going to ignore the fact SpongeBob might be dead?
Hoopla: There’s an infinite amount of dimensions meaning there’s an infinite amount of SpongeBobs. It doesn’t matter that much...probably.
SpongeBob: No guys I’m fine I just took a hit. Okay new plan. 
Squidward: What’s the plan? Oh wait, let's just get him inside.
Crayons: Good plan.
SpongeBob: GO!
(Everyone runs around the glitch monster and jumps down the stairs quickly. The monster turns around and follows)
Glitch Monster: HERE’S JOHNNY!
Squidward: I don’t understand any bit of what that thing is trying to communicate but we need to get it through the portal so we can drown it in Hoopla’s beach dimension.
Hoopla: We have some deep oceans. There was also a haunted shipwreck there once, but I think it’s gone now. I think. Just watch out for anything down there.
Squidward: Have you gone on any adventures in that ocean?
Hoopla: No, but maybe I should. Hmmm. Well that can be for another time.
Squidward: Alright, let’s get it through the portal.
(Squidward leads everyone towards the portal)
Krabs: I hope this works. If it doesn’t, I can always call on my Komrades to come help out.
Squidward: Wait aren’t they all dead?
Krabs: There's always more Komrades.
Hoopla: Okay so when you lead it through the portal, should I stay here or should I go back to my home dimension?
Squidward: Probably go back. Based on what you said, it sounds like you have your own fantastic adventure. 
Hoopla: Ok, well, you go in first to get rid of this monster. I’ll stay behind for a second to make sure it goes in.
(Squidward jumps into the portal; everyone follows after him, except Hoopla. The monster walks over to the portal confused)
Glitch Monster: Do you mind explaining what exactly is going on in here?
(The monster walks through the portal; our heroes find themselves on a deserted part of Hoopla’s Fantastic Beach. Meanwhile, Hoopla is on the other side of the portal.)
Hoopla: Okay, the monster went through the portal. Time to go back into my dimension.
(Hoopla tries walking into the portal, but he can’t get through.)
Hoopla: What the? Guys, I can’t get through! 
(silence)
Hoopla: Actually I don’t think sound travels through portals.
(Hoopla tries again to get into his dimension, but fails.)
Hoopla: Why isn’t this working? Ok, I gotta come up with a logical explanation. Maybe...maybe I’m not being allowed to enter my dimension. Iris tasked me with fixing all the dimensions, so retreating to my own would be cheating. Huh. Now I’m really not sure what to think of him. Well, I’m sure once I’m done fixing these dimensions I’ll be allowed back in. And I’m sure everything is going fine with everyone on the other side of the portal.
(Security walks up)
Hoopla: Oh hey Security. I thought you died.
Security: No but I was tortured with endless movie quotes. I don’t think I’m capable of fighting after that. I’ll just stay here with you.
Hoopla: o
(Meanwhile on the other side of the portal, the Glitch Monster has SpongeBob grasped in its right hand)
SpongeBob: Why is it always me?!
Noseward: (shrugs) Beats me.
Squidward: We gotta drown this monster, and fast.
Mr. Krabs: So what's the plan?
Crayons: I have the hologram system. All I have to do is-
(Suddenly, the Glitch Monster snatches the hologram machine from Crayons)
Crayons: MY HOLOGRAM MACHINE! I need that!
Glitch Monster: Hasta la vista, baby!
Crayons: Uh, a little help here guys?
Squidward: What are we supposed to do?!
Crayons: Find a way to get the hologram machine back!
Mr. Krabs: On it!
(Mr. Krabs uses a gun to shoot the Glitch Monster’s hand, and it glitches as it gets hit, causing the hologram machine to drop to the ground)
Mr. Krabs: Holy crap that actually worked. 
Crayons: You mean you didn't think it would?
Mr. Krabs: Uhh...
SpongeBob: Now get me down!
Crayons: Okay.
(Crayons uses his own gun to shoot the Glitch Monster’s other hand, which causes SpongeBob to drop to the ground)
Crayons: Let's finish this glitch off. We can call ourselves the glitch techs.
Noseward: That sounds like some silly cartoon.
(SpongeBob gives the hologram machine to Crayons, who turns it on)
Mr. Krabs: So how does this hologram doo-hickey work?
Crayons: I'll project the entire ocean onto the Glitch Monster, which will make it think it's drowning. Everyone knows technology hates water. Just gotta find the right setting…
(The Glitch Monster starts rapidly approaching the machine)
SpongeBob: Make it quick!
Noseward: This monster isn’t so smart if it’s actively going into an ocean. I mean there is an entire town to the east of us that could terrorize.
Glitch Monster: (stops) Wait a second, what did you just say?
Noseward: (sweating) Oh, gee, uh, y’know...town to the east, and stuff...y’know?
Glitch Monster: (looks eastward): You mean that town right there.
Noseward: Uhmm….
Glitch Monster: Okay. See ya. (flies toward to town)
Mr. Krabs: At least it stopped quoting movies now.
Squidward: NOSEWARD! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!
Noseward: I don’t think logically when I’m stressed! It’s like peer pressure but they aren’t your peer and really hate you.
Crayons: So much for drowning it.
SpongeBob: Come on guys! We gotta go save this town!
(Meanwhile…)
Tony: I’ve been thinking about getting an ant farm.
Boopla: (reading newspaper) Uh-huh.
Alpooh: Tony, an ant farm isn’t going to boost profits.
Boopla: (looking over) Yeah, and building a giant box fort isn’t?
Alpooh: Hey, that was fun! Just saying, if you ever need anymore box fort makers, you can always hire Bubble Bass.
Bubble Bass: You gotta hire me Boopla, my mom is gonna stop paying for all my Mermaid Man action figures soon!
Boopla: Ugh. Satan, you know what to do.
Satan: Yep. (picks up Bubble Bass) Back into the fiery pits you go.
(Suddenly, screaming.)
Boopla: Oh great, what now?
Alpooh: Whatever it is, I’m not dealing with it.
Boopla: Hold on. (dialing phone) Hey Carl, what’s going on out there?
Carl: There’s some kind of… glitch… monster?
Boopla: So much for believing we would have no more attacks after the Oobglo.
Carl: Unfortunately, Hoopla isn’t here to help us since he got sucked into that portal. I think Bernie Swanders is trying to organize the Oopla-Tribe to fight it, but “glitches” and “monsters” aren’t really his specialty.
(Cut back to the Cult of Squid gang, where they are running over to town)
Squidward: We can’t let the monster destroy the town!
Noseward: Because?
Squidward: I have morals, Noseward.
Noseward: Oh right. Good point.
(They then approach the town, and see the Glitch Monster in the distance)
Crayons: There he is! Let’s get him once and for all!
Mr. Krabs: I’ll be right back.
Crayons: Wait, don’t… (Krabs has already left) go.
SpongeBob: So how are we gonna defeat the monster now that we can’t drown it?
Squidward: Wait, didn’t Hoopla mention some scientist? I can’t remember his name.
Crayons: Doclement or something like that. Maybe we could come up with something to defeat the monster. I’ll be back in an hour, okay?
Noseward: And you’re just gonna leave us to defend the town?
Crayons: ...yes.
(Cut to Crayons searching all over town for Doclement)
Crayons: Excuse me, have you seen someone named Doclement?
Citizen: HA! NERD!
Crayons: ANSWER THE QUESTION!
Citizen: Oh I don’t know, he lives in a bunker in the forest or something. It’s weird. He’s weird.
Crayons: Thanks. (He heads into the forest, and quickly finds a bunker.) That was easier than I thought.
(He enters the bunker and looks for Doclement. Eventually, he finds a room where Doclement is pacing back and forth)
Doclement: AHHH! Who are you?! I haven’t seen anyone since Hoopla got sucked up in that portal. I’ve been trying to think of a solution for why that happened. I’m not sure how long it’s been since that day. Let’s see…weeks, months, somewhere around that.
Crayons: Are you aware that there’s a Glitch Monster terrorizing your town?
Doclement: A glitch monster?! Well I’m sorry but I’m too focused on my research to combat any monsters right now. It only matters to me if It will help me find out where Hoopla is.
Crayons: Oh well then I’m sure you’d be glad to know it actually does.
Doclement: Yeah yeah- wait, what?
Crayons: That glitch monster was formed because of a time glitch that occurred when I was trying to experiment with entering the multiverse in my dimension. What I did actually brought your green friend to my dimension.
Doclement: So Hoopla was brought into the multiverse?! Why?!
Crayons: It’s a long story...it’s better if he tells you when he gets back here. Just be aware that he’s fine.
Doclement: If you can enter here, then why can Hoopla not?
Crayons: I don’t know. He’s been tasked with fixing dimensions, probably somewhere in that contract it said he couldn’t return here until the job was done.
Doclement: I see.
Crayons: Well, now we better think of a way to defeat this monster. From scientist to scientist, I’m sure we can think of a way.
Doclement: My only idea is some sort of anti-virus software. If it’s a glitch, some sort of software like that could shut it down.
Crayons: Anti-virus software sucks. I hate you, McAfee.
Doclement: Yeah, but we need to make one specifically made to destroy the monster. It’ll take a little while, probably.
Crayons: I can deal with that. Let’s get to work.
(Back in town, the cult tries to stall the Glitch Monster)
Squidward: Everyone grab a gun and fire! Maybe if we can shoot it enough, we’ll slow it down!
SpongeBob: I’m on it.
(SpongeBob absorbs all the cult’s weaponry and uses his pores to shoot at the Glitch Monster. It stalls for around 3 seconds, then continues on its rampage)
Noseward: It’s not gonna be enough!
SpongeBob: Darn, I thought being a sponge would be enough. Say, where’s Krabs?
Mr. Krabs: I’m… (panting) back… with some cult members.
(The shot extends out to show that Mr. Krabs has brought several Komrades with him)
SpongeBob: Great idea, Mr. Krabs! Maybe if we get them all to shoot at the monster, we can stall him for longer!
Squidward: Did you bring more weapons?
Mr. Krabs: (drops an entire set of weapons onto the ground) Way ahead of you. Cultists, FIRE!
(The Cult members all pick up the weapons and start shooting at the Glitch Monster in the distance. It continues to stall for 5 entire minutes before starting chaos again)
Squidward: Only five minutes? Phooey!
Noseward: How about we just hide until this all blows over?
Mr. Krabs: Should I get more members from our dimension?
Squidward: There’s no point! We need to take shelter!
Mr. Krabs: Why are you guys acting so irrational right now?
Squidward: TAKE SHELTER, I SAY!
Mr. Krabs: Um, okay. Hey, that hotel looks nice. Let’s go there.
(Everyone heads into the hotel lobby and sits down somewhere)
SpongeBob: So, how’s everyone?
Everyone else: Bad.
(Boopla and Carl exit the elevator and head toward the lobby)
Carl: Whoa why are there so many people in the lobby?
Boopla: Something tells me there’s a party going on.
Squidward: IT’S NOT A PARTY!
Mr. Krabs: Wait a second, aren’t you that Carl guy from Krabby O’ Mondays long ago?
Carl: Yes, I’ve already had this conversation with my Mr. Krabs, because you clearly don’t seem like you’re from here.
Boopla: Okay, well, hi, I’m Boopla. I work with Satan.
Noseward: BOOPLA?! I HAVE HEARD TERRIBLE THINGS ABOUT YOU! (screams)
Squidward: SATAN?! (screams)
Boopla: Uh-
Mr. Krabs: Why are we even in here?! We should be stalling that monster!
Squidward: But we're all out of ideas, Krabs! We've used all our weapons and all our team!
Boopla: Not all of your team. I don’t have a clue on who you guys are, but if you’re trying to stop that monster, then we can help.
Carl: Well, I already know what I have to do. (calls on a phone) Ok so you know the monster outside? Yeah. Uh-huh. Okay. (hangs up) They should be here in a second.
(All the other HFB characters arrive)
Squidward: Wow...okay, that was more than I expected.
Alpooh: Another battle? I am being paid extra for this one.
Tony: Tony
(laugh track)
Boopla: He does that often. Don’t question it.
Oopla-Tribe: OOPLA!
Boopla: Hey wait where’s Bernie?
Oopla-Tribe: He said he didn’t want to die.
Boopla: Understandable.
Zoopla: We’re here too but we’re just gonna cheer you on from inside here.
Woopla: Yes.
Squidward: Okay everyone, Doclement and Crayons are working on a device to stop this monster. While they do that, we will have to fight off the monster to give them time.
(They all run outside with tons of weapons)
Glitch Monster: What are you guys doing back here? I thought I scared you off.
SpongeBob: We got backup!
Glitch Monster: Every man dies.
Zoopla: Good thing I'm a woman then.
Woopla: Hey what about me?
Mr. Krabs: ATTACK!
(Everyone, including the HFB characters, start blasting away at the Glitch Monster)
Noseward: Hey Boopla, I am a bit scared of you, with all the soul selling and whatnot, but I think you could put that power to good use. And I’m just a nose so I can’t do much.
Boopla: Hmm…(digs into his pocket and pulls out the book of souls) I’m releasing you guys for this one time only. (he releases the souls and they all attack the Glitch Monster)
Alpooh: I think I might have some of my old hypnosis technology on me.
Carl: Um, why do you still have that?
Alpooh: You never know.
SpongeBob: That’s not really ethical.
Alpooh: Shut the hell up (starts hypnotising the Glitch Monster.)
Squidward: Here’s our chance to deal some big damage.
(Squidward, Noseward, SpongeBob, and Mr. Krabs all start shooting at the Glitch Monster.)
Tony: Oh we’re doing this now I guess. (throws a frying pan)
Boopla: Really. A frying pan.
Tony: If I got that ant farm I could have unleashed an army of ants.
Boopla: They’re ants. They can be stepped on.
Tony: Well I like to believe that they can accomplish anything.
Boopla: Ants, Tony. Ants.
Zoopla: I must say, these are some interesting looking people. There’s a crab, an octopus, and even a stuffy nose!
Noseward: Hey! I am not stuffy! (sniffs)
Woopla: And what’s up with the porous thing?
SpongeBob: (laughs) I’m what got this whole thing started! SpongeBob… SquarePants!
Woopla: Doesn’t ring a bell.
(SpongeBob deflates in disappointment)
SpongeBob: Hey look, another cult!
Oopla-Tribe: We’re not a cult!
SpongeBob: Tribe, cult, same thing.
(The Oopla-Tribe sighs)
Carl: Speaking of cults, we need to work together as one!
Mr. Krabs: You’re one to talk, soulless manager!
Carl: Hey, that was 16 years ago! I’ve changed!
Glitch Monster: Stop it! You’re all so annoying! Not just with your attacks, but with this endless talking! I mean you’re supposed to be fighting me, not chit-chatting! Not that I want that y’know.
Boopla: We are attacking you. It’s multi-tasking.
Glitch Monster: Well I’ve had quite enough of it! This ends now!
Squidward: Oh dear.
Noseward: I really hope Crayons and Doclement are done by now!
(Doclement and Crayons are putting the finishing touches on the anti-virus machine)
Crayons: Wrench.
Wrench: Hi.
Doclement: AHH! TALKING WRENCH!
Wrench: Just shut up and use me already.
Doclement: Okay, fine. (he takes the wrench and does the finishing touches on the invention) And it’s done! And it only took two hours!
Crayons: And I’m officially sleep deprived. Let’s bring this baby to town.
(The two of them start lifting up the invention)
Crayons: This is kinda heavy…
Doclement: Yeah, I didn’t put weight into consideration. Just put your back into it. Now let’s hurry up, I’m not sure how well everyone is handling the monster.
Crayons: Alright, let’s get there fast!
(Doclement and Crayons get there to see the Glitch Monster is holding everyone)
Glitch Monster: Even better. More fools to take in.
Squidward: Hey wait a minute, why is that guy still standing?
(The camera pans over to Tony)
Tony: t
Glitch Monster: Oh...I like him. Anyway, everyone else is going to die soon.
Crayons: Not if we have anything to do with it.
Doclement: Fire the machine!
(Doclement and Crayons both hit the fire button at the same time, which injects an anti-virus into the Glitch Monster)
Glitch Monster: Wait, why do I feel weird? (he drops everyone) No, no....
(The Glitch Monster begins to shrink and shrink)
Glitch Monster: It appears I’m dying. I’ve also come to the realization I am a one-off villain and my whole life is meaningless. Ah, oh well. (blows up into nothing)
Doclement: Wow. Okay.
Squidward: Is it over? Did we finally do it?
Crayons: It seems so.
(Everyone cheers)
SpongeBob: It was nice meeting you guys, but we have to return to our home dimension.
Noseward: I really need to relax after today.
Boopla: I’m assuming we will never see each other again, so goodbye forever!
Alpooh: And hey, if you guys ever want a new cult member, or anything-
Squidward: No.
Alpooh: Aw.
Crayons: It was a great time working with you, my fellow scientist.
Doclement: I agree.
(The COS characters start walking into the portal)
Crayons: Uh before I leave can you just tell me how you shrunk yourself and got underwater, since you’re a dog? Also can you woof?
Doclement: Haha, no.
(They enter back into the COS dimension)
Hoopla: Oh, good, I guess everything worked out.
Squidward: Yeah, that Glitch Monster is finally goners.
Crayons: You’re telling me… 
Security: And I’m okay! Right, guys? That’s what we all care about now right?
Crayons: Security, we just defeated an entire fricking monster, you don’t get to talk here.
Security: Oh okay.
Hoopla: Well I must say, it was nice meeting you guys. It’s time I go back to my dimension now.
Squidward: Bye, weirdo Hoopla.
Hoopla: What did you just call me?
Squidward: Nothing, nothing.
(Suddenly, a beam of light appears in the room, and out of that light pops out Bloxyl)
Bloxyl: Well uh, this is awkward. Hello, my name is Bloxyl. A higher being.
Noseward: Not again… (he passes out)
Security: (shrugs) Why not. (he passes out as well)
Squidward: I need some sleep anyway, after what just happened and all. That felt like a movie. (passes out, along with the rest of the COS characters)
Bloxyl: It appears there was some sort of glitch in the system, Hoopla. But it appears you have everything under control now.
Hoopla: It was mostly them who defeated that glitch monster. (points to the now passed out cult)
Bloxyl: Maybe I should’ve chosen a less flashy entrance. Anyways, thanks again Hoopla. We’re now back on track to the next dimension. 
Hoopla: What is the next dimension I go to anyway?
Bloxyl: Um… it’s pretty, well… insane.
Hoopla: Oh dear.
Bloxyl: Yeah. Well, good luck, and try not to go insane yourself. (disappears, and another wormhole appears under Hoopla)
Hoopla: I’m not looking forward to this.
(Hoopla gets sucked into the wormhole)
(end)
Noseward: Wait, wait! We have this portal working now, so we can get that futuristic technology now, right?
…
Right?
==Trivia==
*This is the longest episode of the entire series so far.
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