The Fabulous Hudson Hornet

The Fabulous Hudson Hornet (AKA Doublemint Kyle) is the writer of a fanfiction of extremely low quality and the artist of a fanart of equally low quality. They were banned for being 11 shortly after joining but Yumi took the time to re-write their fanfiction.
The Fabulous Hudson Hornet, like ChatKris12, sadly subscribes to the very poorly informed theory that Harumi may have managed to survive her death in Hunted, despite all visible evidence, common sense, the laws of physics and the show's creators confirming she could not have survived. The "evidence" for her survival, according to The Fabulous Hudson Hornet, comes from a single freeze-frame in the final episode of Ninjago featuring a very distant white speck, which The Fabulous Hudson Hornet claims is Harumi's hair.
After a frankly unnecessary amount of repeated arguments from Kyle, it was suggested they write up their own Alternate Universe (AU) fanfic. The most noticeable aspect of their "fanfic" is the complete and total lack of any punctuation beyond a pair of "-". There are also some very interesting references to seemingly random additions: weasels and a "Chocolate City". The fan fiction ends on a cliff hanger which, perhaps for the first time in history, does not make anyone want to continue reading. 
The fanfic has been compared to Hero General Vex's Never-Verse, which is frankly unfair to Vex.
Yumi has stated that the revisions to the fanfiction are the absolute bare minimum needed to make it cohesive. Given that the re-write completely overhauls the work and increases the length by about 10 times, this can be seen as a bad sign. After the revisions were DM'd to Hudson Hornet, he agreed to write better in the future. (However it should also be noted that Yumi's re-write also has occasional spelling errors.)
== Original Fanfiction ==
What if harumi survived as the building crumbled harumi was trying to get away but she couldn’t find a way out she was bleeding real bad you are a badly said a stranger who are you harumi said weasel I am omega-san said the stranger you look good for our plan he said what plan she said oh just you’ll wait he heals harumi you healed me she said she was able to get back up I need to go wait don’t you want to destroy lloyd do you he said not real- NOT REALLY WHY I kinda like him she said while she blushed Omega san laughs hysterically that is so funny come on we’re going to need one more for our planTo be continuedThis is part two for the first writing Aw there it is the realm crystal said Omega san said Crystal why do you need that jun- harumi HEY IT’S NOT JUNK Omega san said angry ok I’ll be quiet harumi said one Omega san randomly make sure there no guards come here Omega san said seriously as Omega absorbs the crystal to make sure the oni come why are you observing that crystal will be supposed to find you other person we were looking for harumi said disappointed to make sure we oni come to destroy the ninja we agreed on that When did i-oh never mind come on let’s go she said okay fine go now as they use the Crystal to go before Omega san has set the oni free please father destroy them and they left Ninjago meanwhile the curse realm all right so who was the person we are looking? Harumi said concerning but we got make it fast before we die cuz if you stay at the cursed realm for way too long you’re dead they later found the person the person was morro come on let’s go said Omega san and all three of them have left the realm as the chocolate city was covered with Oni gas they have to leave get out of the City quickly all Rights now let’s go to my layer to tell you the plan To be continued
== Yumi's Revision ==
The line between the scent of blood and iron blurred itself amongst clouds of dust and collapsing concrete as Harumi dashed down the collapsing building. Moments before, she had stared down a figure with pale hair, clad in green standing on the rooftop opposite to her - the boy that had let her parents die, hailed as a saviour by the rest of the world - Green Ninja Lloyd Garmadon. Weeks ago, the former Jade Princess had brought his father, King of Shadows Lord Garmadon, back from the Departed Realm by exploiting the fact that he was one-quarter Oni, a mysterious race only spoken of in the most fearful of whispers, said to live within places where no light touched. Using an archaic Oni Ritual, she had watched as New Ninjago City gasped at their former Jade Princess as they watched her escort the King of Shadows onto their streets, cried in shock as she reveled in watching him and the 10-meter tall stone titan he had created mere hours after his resurrection brutally kill Lloyd’s friends in front of him, dreaded as she reveled in her hatred. Harumi was sane, perfectly sane - it was the rest of the world who was delusional. Now, in a recent battle, the stone titan, eyes glowing and crevices caked with moss, was caught in between yet another confrontation between the disgraced Green Ninja and his father.The past couple days had seen a crippling loss for the former Jade Princess - while she had succeeded in convincing the King of Shadows in disowning his son and adopting her instead, an event she had planned to gloat to Lloyd about when she next saw him, she had also witnessed the same being rip apart his own enforcers limb by limb for failing to complete a mission and allowed the Green Ninja and a group of his allies to spread a message of propagandistic hate against Garmadon right under her nose. That she had not suffered the same fate as her comrades was nothing short of a miracle to her - every time she had gotten close to achieving what she wanted, people would always come to doubt her and undermine her. Such, she reasoned, was the painful existence of a woman such as she, that she would live in a world where she was the only sane being alive, forever rejected. Even Garmadon gazed upon her painted face differently these past few nights, the hints of malice growing less into hints and more into overt signs. However, minutes before, during the fateful clash, the stone titan had knocked down the building she was standing in - suddenly, she was back in her apartment, much smaller. A snake of enormous size sped outside her window. A Green Ninja doll lay at her feet, her parents rushing to save her. The Green Ninja would save her, she reasoned. The Green Ninja would come for them all. Seconds later, all had become one as the rubble collapsed upon her parents. The Green Ninja was not there for her; from that day onwards, Harumi had come to believe that nobody was.All this flashed before her eyes as she sped down the building the stone titan had just reduced to dust. Again, the Green Ninja was not there to save her. He had, in fact, reached out to her, his lips, those gorgeous, beautiful lips, whispering her name, his eyes filled with pity… but he was too far away - Harumi had resigned herself to her fate. She lingered on his face - she hated that face, of course. She was sure of this. Absolutely. She hated that beautiful, handsome face. ’Perhaps’, she reasoned, ‘if I had been stronger, as strong as Garmadon…’ then she shook her head. ‘No. Even Garmadon wasn’t there for me. Nobody ever was.’ The angst started to engulf her, clouding the judgement within her already eroded mind. It was in this moment, amongst the clouds of dust laden with the thick smell of crimson, some of it undoubtedly her own, that Harumi realized that she was still alive. She tried to sit up. The effort nearly made her pass out. The nearly applied red faceprint had streaked into a messy blur, hiding the true extent of the bleeding. Harumi had spent her life as the Quiet One watching as her enforcer Mr. E broke the bones of countless enemies - she did not need to be told that she was experiencing even worse fractures. A brief glint of remorse flickered into her mind as through blurry vision she saw the silhouettes of Garmadon and Lloyd in the distance, towering above her, still locked in battle. How could she measure up to either of them? They were titans, hardened by countless battles and strengthened by the powers of a literal deity. She was the leader of a cult and the only other being she could be compared to happened to be a herptophile noodle salesman. ‘Once again’, she thought, ‘I’m nothing.’Befiting her name, she remained quiet and alone as she began to bleed out. She pushed the remorse far out of her mind. She didn’t want to think - did she know that on some level putting a mass murderer in charge of New Ninjago City would result in numerous casualties like the one she was about to become? Possibly, but she had always found it easy to push the uncomfortable thought out of her disturbed mind. Right now, it was decidedly a little more difficult. “You are badly hurt,” a voice said in the distance. Harumi let out a faint whisper, barely audible, “Yeah…” She had hoped to say something wittier but her wits were failing her, as was her heart.A man steped out from the distance, if he could even be called that. He was barefoot, having an abnormal number of toes on his goat-like legs. His skin seemed to be black from a distance, but as Harumi observed, she realized it was not so. A more accurate description of this stranger would be that he seemed to suck all the colours around him into a single, nebulous amorphous dark void that stood in the place of skin. Clad in a tiger-skin loincloth and carrying a Kanabo mysteriously shaped like Borg Tower itself, the stranger gazed out at her with piercing, sharp eyes that glowed a malevolent purple. Upon his head was a pair of horns, as impressively long as they were sharp. Harumi gazed at the necklace that the stranger was wearing - made of stones unlike any seen on this world, carved into it was a character that Harumi recognized all too well - Oni.“Who… are you?” She asked, her voice still faint. “Are you… really an Oni?”The stranger arched his sliver eyebrows. “I was not aware my kind were so commonly part of your folklore,” he rasped. Harumi observed his voice was otherworldly, raspy and grated, as if produced from a million tormented souls speaking as one - it was a voice that embodied and commanded fear. Harumi explained, “I have done research on your kind… extensive research.” The Oni motioned to Borg Tower and the battle still raging above them. “Are you the one who brought back this member of my brethren?” He inquired. Harumi paused to wonder what the Oni wanted, what angle he was trying to approach the situation from and what he might do to her if she answered in an undesirable fashion. ‘If I heard an answer I didn’t like, after all,’ she reasoned, ‘I’d throw whoever answered me to Ultra Violet. Let her have some fun with the poor soul on the back of a speeding motorbike.’ Eventually, she decided to answer the creature truthfully. “Yes.”At this the Oni seemed pleased. “Even if your talents are antiquated, your spirit may be valuable to our plan.” “…our?” Paying her comment no mind, the Oni continued, looking down upon her battered form, “I am Omega. Pledge your allegiance to me and I shall restore your body. Then I will give you purpose - a cause to live the rest of your short, pitiful lifespan.” Harumi looked back upon the life of rejection and loss she had led. On the one hand, letting herself follow Omega may lead to yet more hurt. One the other, this one may finally be the acceptance she craved. A wise man had once said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and hoping for a different result.” Harumi prayed to whatever fickle gods that may have been listening that such a man who said that was in fact the insane one. “I pledge my allegiance to you, mighty Omega.”At this, the creature snapped, bringing down his Kanabo millimetres from her dirty white hair. “Is that how you dress a being of superior status to yourself, you miserable ant? You will refer to me as Sama, do you understand, pathetic girl?” Harumi grimaced. “Yes, Omega-sama.” At this, Omega withdrew the Kanabo and raised his arms. Small clouds of purple smoke appeared out of thin air and wafted slowly over Harumi’s body. In an instant, she felt her bones mending, the blood in her veins replenishing, and her wounds closing. Even her makeup had restored itself, she saw in the reflection of some shattered glass nearby. "You healed me!" Harumi gasped. “Your wounds no longer plague you,” Omega explained in his horrible rasp. “Oni are the strongest of beings - our powers are as numerous as they are powerful, unlike your own, as you have proven to me during out brief encounter. This is where we part ways, Jade Princess Harumi. I have important business to attend to.” Paying no attention to how Omega knew her name, Harumi got to her feet. “Omega-sama, please wait. I assume your business would involve the destruction of one, green pest, shall we say?” Omega turned his head slightly in her direction, not breaking stride. “You know of this individual, Lloyd Garmadon?”Harumi laughed. “Do I know him? Only the thoughts of his brutal murder do I know, yes! Oh, how I shall make him suffer a thousand deaths-“ “Silence!” Omega hissed. “Your theatrics suit your makeup, but we have no need for such foolish edge. If you wish to destroy the young Garmadon, you will have to banish all feelings of unnecessary angst, fear, hatred, or…” Pausing, locking his terrible eyes with hers, “…love.” At this, the disgraced Jade Princess snapped. With a cry amidst a blush she professed, “I do not love him-“ “Silence!” Omega again retaliated with a voice like a poisonous serpent. “Your sentiment deludes you, child. And you make a terrible liar. How you ever obtained the Mask of Deception with your skills is beyond me.” That got Harumi in the heart. "You knnow nothing of deception," she dared to whisper under her breath. Her lips then remained sealed, a skill she had become rather good at anyway. At this silence, the Oni chuckled slightly, but malevolently. It sounded like the gnashing of knives and the shattering of dreams within Harumi’s mind, a horrible sort of sound, the sort you would only hear in the torture chambers she herself constructed underneath New Ninjago City’s subway system. “Funny.” Omega rasped curtly. Suddenly, his face became serious again. “Come now. For our plan, we must acquire one more.” The two servants of the darkness walked silently, both psychopaths in their own right - Neither Garmadon nor Lloyd noticed the two spectres of evil glide by as the sun set upon an unsuspecting New Ninjago City.With ease, the two slipped into Borg Tower like ghosts. In fact, the efficient at which Omega was able to enter frightened Harumi, although Omega did have to rely on her to bypass the security codes the Sons of Garmadon had set upon occupying the tower. ‘Am I being manipulated?’ She thought hesitantly as the two of them descended down an elevator into the basement. They entered a small vault, deep under the towers. The metal walls were sterile, security cameras lined every wall. “In my day,” commented Omega, “We would use guard dogs. How times have changed, and perhaps not for the better.” Their walk was occasionally punctuated by occasional blips and whirs from as-yet-unseen machinery. Eventually, the two of them came to an unsuspecting door. Omega laughed.“Guard dogs. This Borg fellow was foolish not to invest in any.” With one mighty swing of his Kanabo, he brought down the heavy steel door crumbling down. It ripped and bucked under the weight of the weapon, shredding as if it were made of paper. The two of them stepped into the room - in it, lay a single podium holding a single object. Harumi thought it resembled a diamond in shape, but it held a deep, blue colour. “Why must you need such garbage as this jewel?” Harumi questioned. “I thought we were seeking out a person, not some fine jewelry-“ “Live up to your name and be the Quiet One! I will not ask you again!” As if on instinct, perhaps a defense mechanism, Harumi’s lips snapped shut as she eyed the Kanabo and the door it annihilated. “We must obtain this third individual in order to bring back my Oni brethren and ensure the destruction of the Ninja,” Omega rasped. “I believe we agreed to this.” Harumi arched an eyebrow. “When did I… oh, never mind.”Omega’s eyes quickly darted around the room and the hallway they had just traversed down, scanning for guardians. Upon seeing that all was apparently safe, he proceeded to explain, “I need not masks to summon beings from other realms. The First Spinjitzu Master, the traitor he was, used this to escape our world. With a wave of my hand, space and time shall bend to my will, and separation will become no more.” Harumi gasped. “The Realm Crystal!” Omega waved the Crystal in the air. Instantly, as if reality was collapsing in on itself, fractures in space appeared, forming a dimensional gateway. It pulled upon itself, a vile thing clearly not meant to exist. Out of it, a tendril of smoke emerged. Harumi could feel goosebumps forming along her skin - it was as if the temperature in the room had dropped exponentially. “Do not touch the smoke,” Omega cautioned. “It is too much for a mere mortal such as yourself to handle.” Harumi winced at this assessment.Somewhere not very far away, Lloyd and Lord Garmadon both felt a shockwave of darkness ripple throughout the land. Lloyd saw his father’s fists tense and his eyebrows knit together. After seconds of eternity, the King of Shadows spoke, his voice laden with terror. “They’ve come..” Fear was not a look that Garmadon wore well, and Lloyd’s mind raced to dark places, recalling the tale he had heard in the Tea Shop. Lloyd looked at his father, a wordless exchange between the two men who had been driven apart by fate. “Please, father,” he whispered, fear creeping into his voice as well. “Destroy them.”Lloyd didn’t know why he trusted Garmadon, who moments ago tried to kill him. He felt himself relapsing into the mindset of a child who wanted nothing but to fall into his father’s arms. Softly he scolded himself for being so weak, glaring at Garmadon.Green mist swirled in the tight cavern where the dimensional gateway opened. Omega and Harumi stepped through, the latter gripping her head. “Grow accustomed to dimensional travel, girl. The strongest allies may not always lie within the world of Ninjago.” Harumi nodded. The cavern walls were an unsightly dark blue, the air was thick with a scent Harumi had unfortunately smelt before - corpses. Although the cave walls had a stone-like texture, they were squishy, almost like the walls of a womb or a stomach. Chains had been crudely stabbed into the walls and where they did, a puss-like substance leaked out, almost as if the walls were in pain. Green slime oozed out of subtle crevices and the green mist almost seemed to form hand-like shapes which gripped at her ankles. They went for Omega’s ankles as well, but inexplicably stopped and backed away from them. Suddenly, a farmer with transparent green skin glided past the two, incandescent and floating silently. With horror, Harumi realized where Omega had taken her.“The Cursed Realm! Why… why are we here? Who could we possibly have need for within such a place?” Harumi gasped. “You must know this tale better than I do, little human,” Omega said, “But powerful allies can be summoned from this place. Years ago, a pitiful being named Morro summoned the Preminent to destroy Ninjago. As you know, the Ninja you call Nya-“ Upon hearing this name, Harumi spat as she recalled the disgusting “playing nice” she had to do around her. “-killed the Preminent that Morro summoned to help him. Thus, we shall summon Morro to help us.” The name was vaguely familiar to Harumi. She remembered in Primeval’s Eye that Lloyd had essentially recounted his life story to her. ‘Wonder how many girls he would do that do, given the chance,’ she wondered. One such chapter of this story involved a ghost named Morro, who had briefly possessed Lloyd and tormented him. Harumi was always curious about this individual who had broken down Lloyd’s defences and tortured him like herself. She had recalled that Lloyd was told that Morro had committed suicide and was sent to the departed realm, so why he could be found in the Cursed Realm was beyond her.“We must move quickly, mortal,” Omega advised with a condescending tone. “Should we stay within this wretched place for too long, the two of us shall die, become ghosts, and find it very difficult to leave.” “A fate that befell the pathetic Sensei Garmadon, yes,” Harumi recalled. “Your research is comprehensive for sure, at least.” “And how do you know so much too, Omega-sama?”“I know many things, Jade Princess. A great many things that would make you loose your mind and delve further into your insanity if they played across your feeble human brain. How I know what I know is not something you are privy to knowing. What you can know, however, is your place.” Harumi paused. “Further insanity?” Omega ignored her. At this point, Harumi had decided it wise not to press the topic further. Eventually, after what seemed like a eternity trudging through the hellhole of the Cursed Realm, Omega and Harumi finally stopped upon an ornate-looking throne. Black spikes adorned the sinister seat and it was twisted into unholy shapes. Slumped upon the chair, glaring at them both, his chin resting on his hands, was a scrawny-looking teenager. His black hair was streaked with green but his eyes were sharp, albeit ringed with dark circles. Upon his chest he wore the symbol of the Green Ninja, although the metal had corroded into a sickly-looking colour, and upon his shoulders he wore a cloak emblazoned with the character for “Evil”.Omega smiled wickedly. “Morro. The master of wind.” The man in the chair finally spoke. “Yeah? What of it? Just who are you?” Omega growled. “You will speak with respect to your superior, oh pathetic breeze!” Morro laughed. “You think you’re better than me?” He arched his eyebrow. “No one is better than me!” He grinned. “Why, you can’t even touch me, whatever you are!” Morro flew straight at Omega, his eyes widening in shock when with one swift motion, Omega grabbed him by the neck. “An Oni chooses what short of filth he is able to touch, and sadly, at this hour it happens to be you.” Morro gritted his teeth as he wheezed, “Impossible…” Omega tilted his head, not breaking eye contact with the spirit. The Oni motioned for Harumi who watched in horror. “This is my servant, Harumi. She has also been hurt by the Green Ninja. I trust that you would like to join her in exacting your revenge?” Morro laughed a sickly, air-deprived laugh as Omega released his grip on him just enough to let him produce intelligible sentences. “What do I look like to you? I haven’t wanted revenge on Lloyd ever since the attack on Styixx. I even helped him during the Day of the Departed. Harumi, is that your name? Let me tell you something.” He drifted closer to her. “The Green Gi is not what makes the Green Ninja who he is. It’s his spirit, a spirit neither you nor this One seem to have.”Harumi lunged at Morro, enraged. “How shallow can you be?! No wonder you failed against Lloyd? You think you’re so smart don’t you, when you’re just a coward who committed suicide because you couldn’t destroy the Green Ninja! I have succeeded a hundred times over where you have failed; you are nothing but a useless ball of edge, all bark and no bite!” “Enough!” Whispered Omega. Suddenly, at even such a minute sound, the entire cavern became deadly still. Even the ghosts laughing in the background stopped. Out of his arms, Omega produced the same smoke that Harumi saw in Borg Tower. “This,” explained Omega, “Is Oni Smoke. Right now, it is no harm to a ghost such as yourself, pitiful being, but I have complete mastery over it, being an Elder Oni. For example…” At a flick of his wrist, Omega hardened the smoke into a solid cube, somewhat resembling ice but in a blacked colour. “…I can turn it into a solid form…”Another flick of the wrist later, the cube turned into a ball of black juice. “…or a liquid form.” Finally, Omega willed the smoke back into a gaseous state. Morro realized what was about to happen next and tried to flee through the walls but was too late - Omega had already commanded the smoke to wrap itself around Morro’s body. “I am going to give you a choice,” Omega hissed at Morro, his voice not even a whisper, his face inches from Morro’s own. “Such is the mercy of my reign. You will accompany the two of us back to Ninjago. You will assist us in the destruction of the Green Ninja. Or,” he waved his hands, and the smoke slowly began to transform states of matter, “You will be destroyed. Would you like to see what happens when a ghost touches liquid Oni Smoke? I myself am quite curious, for in all my years conquering realms and beating them into submission this has been something I have not seen. Would you be destroyed like what happens when you touch water, or will you be petrified? So many questions, young Wind Master, so many questions, you ant.” “Enough! Stop it! Just leave me alone!” Morro screamed, his voice akin to a child having a tantrum.“Then you agree to help? Agree to put aside this petty phase of benevolence and assist us in the destruction of Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon?” “Acceptance of my imperfection; this is not a phase, that’s just who I am,” hissed Morro. “But then again, so is self preservation. Let’s just get this over with.” Omega snarled a wicked and cruel smile. “You have chosen wisely. Come. We leave for New Ninjago City at once.” The three of them walked back to the dimensional gateway, the other ghosts silently gawking as the former right-hand of the Preminent now strode, bond by smoke that could turn into liquid at a moment’s notice.As they stepped back into New Ninjago City, nothing was the same. Oni Smoke had completely enveloped the vault. As they exited Borg Tower, Harumi gasped as she saw her entire city filled with the stuff. She even passed Killow on her way out, his entire body having turned grey, sheer terror painted upon his massive face. She wondered why she was not feeling the effects of the Oni Smoke either until she looked at Omega’s hands - He was passively bending it out of the way. Her foot crunched on something soft - she looked down: It was a bar of chocolate, dropped by a small girl who had been petrified, calling out to her parents. The thoughts of regret began to creep into her mind as she looked upon the streets and saw people frozen in their apartments. Like always, she blocked them out of her mind. “I have a lair upon this miserable rock,” Omega rasped to Harumi and Morro, who was still wrapped in chains of One Smoke. “There are some here who may be able to resist the smoke. Come with me, and under the protection of secrecy, I shall explain where we will proceed from here.” Harumi and Morro looked at one another, difficult-to-read expressions splashing across their faces. She knew the Green Ninja would be coming for them. She would be ready. Omega continued, “Let the destruction of the Green Ninja begin.” The three of them again walked silently into the darkness, smoke curling around them until their image was no more.
Category:Characters