Ghoulish Letters

This collection of notes was scavenged off of a scaab defeated while the adventurers were traveling in southern Gavony.
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My dear Gisa,
Must you always cheat?
We AGREED on rules of conduct. The Five Laws of NecroWarfare:
*No spontaneous awakenings.
*No luring, killing, and raising of bystanders or livestock.
*Combatants face off at a predetermined place and time.
*Combatants must have at least three limbs to play.
*Headquarters are off limits.
You can't raise ghouls mid-battle! You must send your army to meet me in the valley. Do not flank me! Do not sneak up behind me!
Legless torsos do not count as soldiers. My skaabs have teeth marks all over their legs from your draggy little meat sacks. Oh, I want my sextant back. And do not come into my laboratory again!
You signed in blood. So it counts.
Geralf
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Geralf,
Must you always whine?
I agreed to nothing.
*I'll raise ghouls anytime I wish. You're just mad because you have to run back and sew more while I can just whistle them up from the grave.
*If a farmer is stupid enough to check out a creepy light, then he deserves to be killed with a shovel and become my servant.
*A predetermined place and time? What is this, a tea party?
*Those so-called "meat sacks" are models of efficiency. You can't even make a skaab walk without giving it 17 different body parts.
*I didn't take your stupid sextant. It probably melted in the fire.
As always, you lack the brains of an infant.
Gisa
P.S. It wasn't even my blood.
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Dear Gisa,
I have decided that your lack of adherence to the Rules of NecroWarfare have utterly ruined our game. Therefore, I will no longer send my elite troops to the field of battle. I have far more devious plans.
Have fun with your lesser specimens.
Geralf
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Geralf,
While I have no interest in your "devious plans," I must insist you inform me of your intentions if you plan to pass through my territory. As you know, my territory begins at Angel's Road and extends to Thraben.
Gisa
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Dear Gisa,
Can you hear me laughing all the way from Trostad? Your territory does not begin at Angel's Road, but I can't be bothered to prove you wrong. If you must know, I plan to raze Thraben to the ground. It will be a glorious city of undead with me as the lunarch.
In an attempt to better myself, I've been musing on the nature of the Blessed Sleep. I postulate that the state of a skaab's mind is equivalent to that of a person who has attained that holy state. So, in actuality, I'm giving these poor sheep exactly what they desire most.
Despite your past offenses, I extend you an invitation. Let us join together in this charitable venture. I claim the Thraben Cathedral, but the rest of the city is yours.
Oh, I must introduce you to my Skaab General. I named him Grimgrin in honor of your face.
Your loving brother,
Geralf
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Geralf,
You've piqued my interest. I will join my forces with yours. Half the city is acceptable. But I demand half the corpses as well.
Gisa
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