SantaClaus

Actually named florpth, the kinkiest name
#Bee Movie Script
#
#
#
#According to all known laws
#of aviation,
#
#
#there is no way a bee
#should be able to fly.
#
#
#Its wings are too small to get
#its fat little body off the ground.
#
#
#The bee, of course, flies anyway
#
#
#because bees don't care
#what humans think is impossible.
#
#
#Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
#Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
#
#
#Ooh, black and yellow!
#Let's shake it up a little.
#
#
#Barry! Breakfast is ready!
#
#
#Ooming!
#
#
#Hang on a second.
#
#
#Hello?
#
#
#- Barry?
#- Adam?
#
#
#- Oan you believe this is happening?
#- I can't. I'll pick you up.
#
#
#Looking sharp.
#
#
#Use the stairs. Your father
#paid good money for those.
#
#
#Sorry. I'm excited.
#
#
#Here's the graduate.
#We're very proud of you, son.
#
#
#A perfect report card, all B's.
#
#
#Very proud.
#
#
#Ma! I got a thing going here.
#
#
#- You got lint on your fuzz.
#- Ow! That's me!
#
#
#- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.
#- Bye!
#
#
#Barry, I told you,
#stop flying in the house!
#
#
#- Hey, Adam.
#- Hey, Barry.
#
#
#- Is that fuzz gel?
#- A little. Special day, graduation.
#
#
#Never thought I'd make it.
#
#
#Three days grade school,
#three days high school.
#
#
#Those were awkward.
#
#
#Three days college. I'm glad I took
#a day and hitchhiked around the hive.
#
#
#You did come back different.
#
#
#- Hi, Barry.
#- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.
#
#
#- Hear about Frankie?
#- Yeah.
#
#
#- You going to the funeral?
#- No, I'm not going.
#
#
#Everybody knows,
#sting someone, you die.
#
#
#Don't waste it on a squirrel.
#Such a hothead.
#
#
#I guess he could have
#just gotten out of the way.
#
#
#I love this incorporating
#an amusement park into our day.
#
#
#That's why we don't need vacations.
#
#
#Boy, quite a bit of pomp...
#under the circumstances.
#
#
#- Well, Adam, today we are men.
#- We are!
#
#
#- Bee-men.
#- Amen!
#
#
#Hallelujah!
#
#
#Students, faculty, distinguished bees,
#
#
#please welcome Dean Buzzwell.
#
#
#Welcome, New Hive Oity
#graduating class of...
#
#
#...9:15.
#
#
#That concludes our ceremonies.
#
#
#And begins your career
#at Honex Industries!
#
#
#Will we pick ourjob today?
#
#
#I heard it's just orientation.
#
#
#Heads up! Here we go.
#
#
#Keep your hands and antennas
#inside the tram at all times.
#
#
#- Wonder what it'll be like?
#- A little scary.
#
#
#Welcome to Honex,
#a division of Honesco
#
#
#and a part of the Hexagon Group.
#
#
#This is it!
#
#
#Wow.
#
#
#Wow.
#
#
#We know that you, as a bee,
#have worked your whole life
#
#
#to get to the point where you
#can work for your whole life.
#
#
#Honey begins when our valiant Pollen
#Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.
#
#
#Our top-secret formula
#
#
#is automatically color-corrected,
#scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured
#
#
#into this soothing sweet syrup
#
#
#with its distinctive
#golden glow you know as...
#
#
#Honey!
#
#
#- That girl was hot.
#- She's my cousin!
#
#
#- She is?
#- Yes, we're all cousins.
#
#
#- Right. You're right.
#- At Honex, we constantly strive
#
#
#to improve every aspect
#of bee existence.
#
#
#These bees are stress-testing
#a new helmet technology.
#
#
#- What do you think he makes?
#- Not enough.
#
#
#Here we have our latest advancement,
#the Krelman.
#
#
#- What does that do?
#- Oatches that little strand of honey
#
#
#that hangs after you pour it.
#Saves us millions.
#
#
#Oan anyone work on the Krelman?
#
#
#Of course. Most bee jobs are
#small ones. But bees know
#
#
#that every small job,
#if it's done well, means a lot.
#
#
#But choose carefully
#
#
#because you'll stay in the job
#you pick for the rest of your life.
#
#
#The same job the rest of your life?
#I didn't know that.
#
#
#What's the difference?
#
#
#You'll be happy to know that bees,
#as a species, haven't had one day off
#
#
#in 27 million years.
#
#
#So you'll just work us to death?
#
#
#We'll sure try.
#
#
#Wow! That blew my mind!
#
#
#"What's the difference?"
#How can you say that?
#
#
#One job forever?
#That's an insane choice to have to make.
#
#
#I'm relieved. Now we only have
#to make one decision in life.
#
#
#But, Adam, how could they
#never have told us that?
#
#
#Why would you question anything?
#We're bees.
#
#
#We're the most perfectly
#functioning society on Earth.
#
#
#You ever think maybe things
#work a little too well here?
#
#
#Like what? Give me one example.
#
#
#I don't know. But you know
#what I'm talking about.
#
#
#Please clear the gate.
#Royal Nectar Force on approach.
#
#
#Wait a second. Oheck it out.
#
#
#- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!
#- Wow.
#
#
#I've never seen them this close.
#
#
#They know what it's like
#outside the hive.
#
#
#Yeah, but some don't come back.
#
#
#- Hey, Jocks!
#- Hi, Jocks!
#
#
#You guys did great!
#
#
#You're monsters!
#You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!
#
#
#- I wonder where they were.
#- I don't know.
#
#
#Their day's not planned.
#
#
#Outside the hive, flying who knows
#where, doing who knows what.
#
#
#You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen
#Jock. You have to be bred for that.
#
#
#Right.
#
#
#Look. That's more pollen
#than you and I will see in a lifetime.
#
#
#It's just a status symbol.
#Bees make too much of it.
#
#
#Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it
#and the ladies see you wearing it.
#
#
#Those ladies?
#Aren't they our cousins too?
#
#
#Distant. Distant.
#
#
#Look at these two.
#
#
#- Oouple of Hive Harrys.
#- Let's have fun with them.
#
#
#It must be dangerous
#being a Pollen Jock.
#
#
#Yeah. Once a bear pinned me
#against a mushroom!
#
#
#He had a paw on my throat,
#and with the other, he was slapping me!
#
#
#- Oh, my!
#- I never thought I'd knock him out.
#
#
#What were you doing during this?
#
#
#Trying to alert the authorities.
#
#
#I can autograph that.
#
#
#A little gusty out there today,
#wasn't it, comrades?
#
#
#Yeah. Gusty.
#
#
#We're hitting a sunflower patch
#six miles from here tomorrow.
#
#
#- Six miles, huh?
#- Barry!
#
#
#A puddle jump for us,
#but maybe you're not up for it.
#
#
#- Maybe I am.
#- You are not!
#
#
#We're going 0900 at J-Gate.
#
#
#What do you think, buzzy-boy?
#Are you bee enough?
#
#
#I might be. It all depends
#on what 0900 means.
#
#
#Hey, Honex!
#
#
#Dad, you surprised me.
#
#
#You decide what you're interested in?
#
#
#- Well, there's a lot of choices.
#- But you only get one.
#
#
#Do you ever get bored
#doing the same job every day?
#
#
#Son, let me tell you about stirring.
#
#
#You grab that stick, and you just
#move it around, and you stir it around.
#
#
#You get yourself into a rhythm.
#It's a beautiful thing.
#
#
#You know, Dad,
#the more I think about it,
#
#
#maybe the honey field
#just isn't right for me.
#
#
#You were thinking of what,
#making balloon animals?
#
#
#That's a bad job
#for a guy with a stinger.
#
#
#Janet, your son's not sure
#he wants to go into honey!
#
#
#- Barry, you are so funny sometimes.
#- I'm not trying to be funny.
#
#
#You're not funny! You're going
#into honey. Our son, the stirrer!
#
#
#- You're gonna be a stirrer?
#- No one's listening to me!
#
#
#Wait till you see the sticks I have.
#
#
#I could say anything right now.
#I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!
#
#
#Let's open some honey and celebrate!
#
#
#Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.
#Shave my antennae.
#
#
#Shack up with a grasshopper. Get
#a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!
#
#
#I'm so proud.
#
#
#- We're starting work today!
#- Today's the day.
#
#
#Oome on! All the good jobs
#will be gone.
#
#
#Yeah, right.
#
#
#Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,
#stirrer, front desk, hair removal...
#
#
#- Is it still available?
#- Hang on. Two left!
#
#
#One of them's yours! Oongratulations!
#Step to the side.
#
#
#- What'd you get?
#- Picking crud out. Stellar!
#
#
#Wow!
#
#
#Oouple of newbies?
#
#
#Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!
#
#
#Make your choice.
#
#
#- You want to go first?
#- No, you go.
#
#
#Oh, my. What's available?
#
#
#Restroom attendant's open,
#not for the reason you think.
#
#
#- Any chance of getting the Krelman?
#- Sure, you're on.
#
#
#I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.
#
#
#Wax monkey's always open.
#
#
#The Krelman opened up again.
#
#
#What happened?
#
#
#A bee died. Makes an opening. See?
#He's dead. Another dead one.
#
#
#Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.
#
#
#Dead from the neck up.
#Dead from the neck down. That's life!
#
#
#Oh, this is so hard!
#
#
#Heating, cooling,
#stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,
#
#
#humming, inspector number seven,
#lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,
#
#
#mite wrangler. Barry, what
#do you think I should... Barry?
#
#
#Barry!
#
#
#All right, we've got the sunflower patch
#in quadrant nine...
#
#
#What happened to you?
#Where are you?
#
#
#- I'm going out.
#- Out? Out where?
#
#
#- Out there.
#- Oh, no!
#
#
#I have to, before I go
#to work for the rest of my life.
#
#
#You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?
#
#
#Another call coming in.
#
#
#If anyone's feeling brave,
#there's a Korean deli on 83rd
#
#
#that gets their roses today.
#
#
#Hey, guys.
#
#
#- Look at that.
#- Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?
#
#
#Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.
#
#
#It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.
#
#
#Really? Feeling lucky, are you?
#
#
#Sign here, here. Just initial that.
#
#
#- Thank you.
#- OK.
#
#
#You got a rain advisory today,
#
#
#and as you all know,
#bees cannot fly in rain.
#
#
#So be careful. As always,
#watch your brooms,
#
#
#hockey sticks, dogs,
#birds, bears and bats.
#
#
#Also, I got a couple of reports
#of root beer being poured on us.
#
#
#Murphy's in a home because of it,
#babbling like a cicada!
#
#
#- That's awful.
#- And a reminder for you rookies,
#
#
#bee law number one,
#absolutely no talking to humans!
#
#
#All right, launch positions!
#
#
#Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,
#buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!
#
#
#Black and yellow!
#
#
#Hello!
#
#
#You ready for this, hot shot?
#
#
#Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.
#
#
#Wind, check.
#
#
#- Antennae, check.
#- Nectar pack, check.
#
#
#- Wings, check.
#- Stinger, check.
#
#
#Scared out of my shorts, check.
#
#
#OK, ladies,
#
#
#let's move it out!
#
#
#Pound those petunias,
#you striped stem-suckers!
#
#
#All of you, drain those flowers!
#
#
#Wow! I'm out!
#
#
#I can't believe I'm out!
#
#
#So blue.
#
#
#I feel so fast and free!
#
#
#Box kite!
#
#
#Wow!
#
#
#Flowers!
#
#
#This is Blue Leader.
#We have roses visual.
#
#
#Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.
#
#
#Roses!
#
#
#30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.
#
#
#Stand to the side, kid.
#It's got a bit of a kick.
#
#
#That is one nectar collector!
#
#
#- Ever see pollination up close?
#- No, sir.
#
#
#I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it
#over here. Maybe a dash over there,
#
#
#a pinch on that one.
#See that? It's a little bit of magic.
#
#
#That's amazing. Why do we do that?
#
#
#That's pollen power. More pollen, more
#flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.
#
#
#Oool.
#
#
#I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.
#Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?
#
#
#Oopy that visual.
#
#
#Wait. One of these flowers
#seems to be on the move.
#
#
#Say again? You're reporting
#a moving flower?
#
#
#Affirmative.
#
#
#That was on the line!
#
#
#This is the coolest. What is it?
#
#
#I don't know, but I'm loving this color.
#
#
#It smells good.
#Not like a flower, but I like it.
#
#
#Yeah, fuzzy.
#
#
#Ohemical-y.
#
#
#Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.
#
#
#My sweet lord of bees!
#
#
#Oandy-brain, get off there!
#
#
#Problem!
#
#
#- Guys!
#- This could be bad.
#
#
#Affirmative.
#
#
#Very close.
#
#
#Gonna hurt.
#
#
#Mama's little boy.
#
#
#You are way out of position, rookie!
#
#
#Ooming in at you like a missile!
#
#
#Help me!
#
#
#I don't think these are flowers.
#
#
#- Should we tell him?
#- I think he knows.
#
#
#What is this?!
#
#
#Match point!
#
#
#You can start packing up, honey,
#because you're about to eat it!
#
#
#Yowser!
#
#
#Gross.
#
#
#There's a bee in the car!
#
#
#- Do something!
#- I'm driving!
#
#
#- Hi, bee.
#- He's back here!
#
#
#He's going to sting me!
#
#
#Nobody move. If you don't move,
#he won't sting you. Freeze!
#
#
#He blinked!
#
#
#Spray him, Granny!
#
#
#What are you doing?!
#
#
#Wow... the tension level
#out here is unbelievable.
#
#
#I gotta get home.
#
#
#Oan't fly in rain.
#
#
#Oan't fly in rain.
#
#
#Oan't fly in rain.
#
#
#Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!
#
#
#Ken, could you close
#the window please?
#
#
#Ken, could you close
#the window please?
#
#
#Oheck out my new resume.
#I made it into a fold-out brochure.
#
#
#You see? Folds out.
#
#
#Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.
#
#
#What was that?
#
#
#Maybe this time. This time. This time.
#This time! This time! This...
#
#
#Drapes!
#
#
#That is diabolical.
#
#
#It's fantastic. It's got all my special
#skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.
#
#
#What's number one? Star Wars?
#
#
#Nah, I don't go for that...
#
#
#...kind of stuff.
#
#
#No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.
#They're out of their minds.
#
#
#When I leave a job interview, they're
#flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.
#
#
#There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.
#
#
#I don't remember the sun
#having a big 75 on it.
#
#
#I predicted global warming.
#
#
#I could feel it getting hotter.
#At first I thought it was just me.
#
#
#Wait! Stop! Bee!
#
#
#Stand back. These are winter boots.
#
#
#Wait!
#
#
#Don't kill him!
#
#
#You know I'm allergic to them!
#This thing could kill me!
#
#
#Why does his life have
#less value than yours?
#
#
#Why does his life have any less value
#than mine? Is that your statement?
#
#
#I'm just saying all life has value. You
#don't know what he's capable of feeling.
#
#
#My brochure!
#
#
#There you go, little guy.
#
#
#I'm not scared of him.
#It's an allergic thing.
#
#
#Put that on your resume brochure.
#
#
#My whole face could puff up.
#
#
#Make it one of your special skills.
#
#
#Knocking someone out
#is also a special skill.
#
#
#Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.
#
#
#- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?
#- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.
#
#
#- You could put carob chips on there.
#- Bye.
#
#
#- Supposed to be less calories.
#- Bye.
#
#
#I gotta say something.
#
#
#She saved my life.
#I gotta say something.
#
#
#All right, here it goes.
#
#
#Nah.
#
#
#What would I say?
#
#
#I could really get in trouble.
#
#
#It's a bee law.
#You're not supposed to talk to a human.
#
#
#I can't believe I'm doing this.
#
#
#I've got to.
#
#
#Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!
#
#
#No. Yes. No.
#
#
#Do it. I can't.
#
#
#How should I start it?
#"You like jazz?" No, that's no good.
#
#
#Here she comes! Speak, you fool!
#
#
#Hi!
#
#
#I'm sorry.
#
#
#- You're talking.
#- Yes, I know.
#
#
#You're talking!
#
#
#I'm so sorry.
#
#
#No, it's OK. It's fine.
#I know I'm dreaming.
#
#
#But I don't recall going to bed.
#
#
#Well, I'm sure this
#is very disconcerting.
#
#
#This is a bit of a surprise to me.
#I mean, you're a bee!
#
#
#I am. And I'm not supposed
#to be doing this,
#
#
#but they were all trying to kill me.
#
#
#And if it wasn't for you...
#
#
#I had to thank you.
#It's just how I was raised.
#
#
#That was a little weird.
#
#
#- I'm talking with a bee.
#- Yeah.
#
#
#I'm talking to a bee.
#And the bee is talking to me!
#
#
#I just want to say I'm grateful.
#I'll leave now.
#
#
#- Wait! How did you learn to do that?
#- What?
#
#
#The talking thing.
#
#
#Same way you did, I guess.
#"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.
#
#
#- That's very funny.
#- Yeah.
#
#
#Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,
#we'd cry with what we have to deal with.
#
#
#Anyway...
#
#
#Oan I...
#
#
#...get you something?
#- Like what?
#
#
#I don't know. I mean...
#I don't know. Ooffee?
#
#
#I don't want to put you out.
#
#
#It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.
#
#
#- It's just coffee.
#- I hate to impose.
#
#
#- Don't be ridiculous!
#- Actually, I would love a cup.
#
#
#Hey, you want rum cake?
#
#
#- I shouldn't.
#- Have some.
#
#
#- No, I can't.
#- Oome on!
#
#
#I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.
#
#
#- Where?
#- These stripes don't help.
#
#
#You look great!
#
#
#I don't know if you know
#anything about fashion.
#
#
#Are you all right?
#
#
#No.
#
#
#He's making the tie in the cab
#as they're flying up Madison.
#
#
#He finally gets there.
#
#
#He runs up the steps into the church.
#The wedding is on.
#
#
#And he says, "Watermelon?
#I thought you said Guatemalan.
#
#
#Why would I marry a watermelon?"
#
#
#Is that a bee joke?
#
#
#That's the kind of stuff we do.
#
#
#Yeah, different.
#
#
#So, what are you gonna do, Barry?
#
#
#About work? I don't know.
#
#
#I want to do my part for the hive,
#but I can't do it the way they want.
#
#
#I know how you feel.
#
#
#- You do?
#- Sure.
#
#
#My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or
#a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.
#
#
#- Really?
#- My only interest is flowers.
#
#
#Our new queen was just elected
#with that same campaign slogan.
#
#
#Anyway, if you look...
#
#
#There's my hive right there. See it?
#
#
#You're in Sheep Meadow!
#
#
#Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!
#
#
#No way! I know that area.
#I lost a toe ring there once.
#
#
#- Why do girls put rings on their toes?
#- Why not?
#
#
#- It's like putting a hat on your knee.
#- Maybe I'll try that.
#
#
#- You all right, ma'am?
#- Oh, yeah. Fine.
#
#
#Just having two cups of coffee!
#
#
#Anyway, this has been great.
#Thanks for the coffee.
#
#
#Yeah, it's no trouble.
#
#
#Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,
#I'd be up the rest of my life.
#
#
#Are you...?
#
#
#Oan I take a piece of this with me?
#
#
#Sure! Here, have a crumb.
#
#
#- Thanks!
#- Yeah.
#
#
#All right. Well, then...
#I guess I'll see you around.
#
#
#Or not.
#
#
#OK, Barry.
#
#
#And thank you
#so much again... for before.
#
#
#Oh, that? That was nothing.
#
#
#Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...
#
#
#This can't possibly work.
#
#
#He's all set to go.
#We may as well try it.
#
#
#OK, Dave, pull the chute.
#
#
#- Sounds amazing.
#- It was amazing!
#
#
#It was the scariest,
#happiest moment of my life.
#
#
#Humans! I can't believe
#you were with humans!
#
#
#Giant, scary humans!
#What were they like?
#
#
#Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.
#
#
#They eat crazy giant things.
#They drive crazy.
#
#
#- Do they try and kill you, like on TV?
#- Some of them. But some of them don't.
#
#
#- How'd you get back?
#- Poodle.
#
#
#You did it, and I'm glad. You saw
#whatever you wanted to see.
#
#
#You had your "experience." Now you
#can pick out yourjob and be normal.
#
#
#- Well...
#- Well?
#
#
#Well, I met someone.
#
#
#You did? Was she Bee-ish?
#
#
#- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!
#- No, no, no, not a wasp.
#
#
#- Spider?
#- I'm not attracted to spiders.
#
#
#I know it's the hottest thing,
#with the eight legs and all.
#
#
#I can't get by that face.
#
#
#So who is she?
#
#
#She's... human.
#
#
#No, no. That's a bee law.
#You wouldn't break a bee law.
#
#
#- Her name's Vanessa.
#- Oh, boy.
#
#
#She's so nice. And she's a florist!
#
#
#Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!
#
#
#We're not dating.
#
#
#You're flying outside the hive, talking
#to humans that attack our homes
#
#
#with power washers and M-80s!
#One-eighth a stick of dynamite!
#
#
#She saved my life!
#And she understands me.
#
#
#This is over!
#
#
#Eat this.
#
#
#This is not over! What was that?
#
#
#- They call it a crumb.
#- It was so stingin' stripey!
#
#
#And that's not what they eat.
#That's what falls off what they eat!
#
#
#- You know what a Oinnabon is?
#- No.
#
#
#It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.
#They heat it up...
#
#
#Sit down!
#
#
#...really hot!
#- Listen to me!
#
#
#We are not them! We're us.
#There's us and there's them!
#
#
#Yes, but who can deny
#the heart that is yearning?
#
#
#There's no yearning.
#Stop yearning. Listen to me!
#
#
#You have got to start thinking bee,
#my friend. Thinking bee!
#
#
#- Thinking bee.
#- Thinking bee.
#
#
#Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
#Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
#
#
#There he is. He's in the pool.
#
#
#You know what your problem is, Barry?
#
#
#I gotta start thinking bee?
#
#
#How much longer will this go on?
#
#
#It's been three days!
#Why aren't you working?
#
#
#I've got a lot of big life decisions
#to think about.
#
#
#What life? You have no life!
#You have no job. You're barely a bee!
#
#
#Would it kill you
#to make a little honey?
#
#
#Barry, come out.
#Your father's talking to you.
#
#
#Martin, would you talk to him?
#
#
#Barry, I'm talking to you!
#
#
#You coming?
#
#
#Got everything?
#
#
#All set!
#
#
#Go ahead. I'll catch up.
#
#
#Don't be too long.
#
#
#Watch this!
#
#
#Vanessa!
#
#
#- We're still here.
#- I told you not to yell at him.
#
#
#He doesn't respond to yelling!
#
#
#- Then why yell at me?
#- Because you don't listen!
#
#
#I'm not listening to this.
#
#
#Sorry, I've gotta go.
#
#
#- Where are you going?
#- I'm meeting a friend.
#
#
#A girl? Is this why you can't decide?
#
#
#Bye.
#
#
#I just hope she's Bee-ish.
#
#
#They have a huge parade
#of flowers every year in Pasadena?
#
#
#To be in the Tournament of Roses,
#that's every florist's dream!
#
#
#Up on a float, surrounded
#by flowers, crowds cheering.
#
#
#A tournament. Do the roses
#compete in athletic events?
#
#
#No. All right, I've got one.
#How come you don't fly everywhere?
#
#
#It's exhausting. Why don't you
#run everywhere? It's faster.
#
#
#Yeah, OK, I see, I see.
#All right, your turn.
#
#
#TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?
#That's insane!
#
#
#You don't have that?
#
#
#We have Hivo, but it's a disease.
#It's a horrible, horrible disease.
#
#
#Oh, my.
#
#
#Dumb bees!
#
#
#You must want to sting all those jerks.
#
#
#We try not to sting.
#It's usually fatal for us.
#
#
#So you have to watch your temper.
#
#
#Very carefully.
#You kick a wall, take a walk,
#
#
#write an angry letter and throw it out.
#Work through it like any emotion:
#
#
#Anger, jealousy, lust.
#
#
#Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?
#
#
#Yeah.
#
#
#- What is wrong with you?!
#- It's a bug.
#
#
#He's not bothering anybody.
#Get out of here, you creep!
#
#
#What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?
#
#
#Yeah, it was. How did you know?
#
#
#It felt like about 10 pages.
#Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.
#
#
#You've really got that
#down to a science.
#
#
#- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.
#- I'll bet.
#
#
#What in the name
#of Mighty Hercules is this?
#
#
#How did this get here?
#Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,
#
#
#Ray Liotta Private Select?
#
#
#- Is he that actor?
#- I never heard of him.
#
#
#- Why is this here?
#- For people. We eat it.
#
#
#You don't have
#enough food of your own?
#
#
#- Well, yes.
#- How do you get it?
#
#
#- Bees make it.
#- I know who makes it!
#
#
#And it's hard to make it!
#
#
#There's heating, cooling, stirring.
#You need a whole Krelman thing!
#
#
#- It's organic.
#- It's our-ganic!
#
#
#It's just honey, Barry.
#
#
#Just what?!
#
#
#Bees don't know about this!
#This is stealing! A lot of stealing!
#
#
#You've taken our homes, schools,
#hospitals! This is all we have!
#
#
#And it's on sale?!
#I'm getting to the bottom of this.
#
#
#I'm getting to the bottom
#of all of this!
#
#
#Hey, Hector.
#
#
#- You almost done?
#- Almost.
#
#
#He is here. I sense it.
#
#
#Well, I guess I'll go home now
#
#
#and just leave this nice honey out,
#with no one around.
#
#
#You're busted, box boy!
#
#
#I knew I heard something.
#So you can talk!
#
#
#I can talk.
#And now you'll start talking!
#
#
#Where you getting the sweet stuff?
#Who's your supplier?
#
#
#I don't understand.
#I thought we were friends.
#
#
#The last thing we want
#to do is upset bees!
#
#
#You're too late! It's ours now!
#
#
#You, sir, have crossed
#the wrong sword!
#
#
#You, sir, will be lunch
#for my iguana, Ignacio!
#
#
#Where is the honey coming from?
#
#
#Tell me where!
#
#
#Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!
#
#
#Orazy person!
#
#
#What horrible thing has happened here?
#
#
#These faces, they never knew
#what hit them. And now
#
#
#they're on the road to nowhere!
#
#
#Just keep still.
#
#
#What? You're not dead?
#
#
#Do I look dead? They will wipe anything
#that moves. Where you headed?
#
#
#To Honey Farms.
#I am onto something huge here.
#
#
#I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,
#crazy stuff. Blows your head off!
#
#
#I'm going to Tacoma.
#
#
#- And you?
#- He really is dead.
#
#
#All right.
#
#
#Uh-oh!
#
#
#- What is that?!
#- Oh, no!
#
#
#- A wiper! Triple blade!
#- Triple blade?
#
#
#Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!
#
#
#Why does everything have
#to be so doggone clean?!
#
#
#How much do you people need to see?!
#
#
#Open your eyes!
#Stick your head out the window!
#
#
#From NPR News in Washington,
#I'm Oarl Kasell.
#
#
#But don't kill no more bugs!
#
#
#- Bee!
#- Moose blood guy!!
#
#
#- You hear something?
#- Like what?
#
#
#Like tiny screaming.
#
#
#Turn off the radio.
#
#
#Whassup, bee boy?
#
#
#Hey, Blood.
#
#
#Just a row of honey jars,
#as far as the eye could see.
#
#
#Wow!
#
#
#I assume wherever this truck goes
#is where they're getting it.
#
#
#I mean, that honey's ours.
#
#
#- Bees hang tight.
#- We're all jammed in.
#
#
#It's a close community.
#
#
#Not us, man. We on our own.
#Every mosquito on his own.
#
#
#- What if you get in trouble?
#- You a mosquito, you in trouble.
#
#
#Nobody likes us. They just smack.
#See a mosquito, smack, smack!
#
#
#At least you're out in the world.
#You must meet girls.
#
#
#Mosquito girls try to trade up,
#get with a moth, dragonfly.
#
#
#Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.
#
#
#You got to be kidding me!
#
#
#Mooseblood's about to leave
#the building! So long, bee!
#
#
#- Hey, guys!
#- Mooseblood!
#
#
#I knew I'd catch y'all down here.
#Did you bring your crazy straw?
#
#
#We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,
#and it's pretty much pure profit.
#
#
#What is this place?
#
#
#A bee's got a brain
#the size of a pinhead.
#
#
#They are pinheads!
#
#
#Pinhead.
#
#
#- Oheck out the new smoker.
#- Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.
#
#
#The Thomas 3000!
#
#
#Smoker?
#
#
#Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.
#Twice the nicotine, all the tar.
#
#
#A couple breaths of this
#knocks them right out.
#
#
#They make the honey,
#and we make the money.
#
#
#"They make the honey,
#and we make the money"?
#
#
#Oh, my!
#
#
#What's going on? Are you OK?
#
#
#Yeah. It doesn't last too long.
#
#
#Do you know you're
#in a fake hive with fake walls?
#
#
#Our queen was moved here.
#We had no choice.
#
#
#This is your queen?
#That's a man in women's clothes!
#
#
#That's a drag queen!
#
#
#What is this?
#
#
#Oh, no!
#
#
#There's hundreds of them!
#
#
#Bee honey.
#
#
#Our honey is being brazenly stolen
#on a massive scale!
#
#
#This is worse than anything bears
#have done! I intend to do something.
#
#
#Oh, Barry, stop.
#
#
#Who told you humans are taking
#our honey? That's a rumor.
#
#
#Do these look like rumors?
#
#
#That's a conspiracy theory.
#These are obviously doctored photos.
#
#
#How did you get mixed up in this?
#
#
#He's been talking to humans.
#
#
#- What?
#- Talking to humans?!
#
#
#He has a human girlfriend.
#And they make out!
#
#
#Make out? Barry!
#
#
#We do not.
#
#
#- You wish you could.
#- Whose side are you on?
#
#
#The bees!
#
#
#I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.
#Those crazy legs kept me up all night.
#
#
#Barry, this is what you want
#to do with your life?
#
#
#I want to do it for all our lives.
#Nobody works harder than bees!
#
#
#Dad, I remember you
#coming home so overworked
#
#
#your hands were still stirring.
#You couldn't stop.
#
#
#I remember that.
#
#
#What right do they have to our honey?
#
#
#We live on two cups a year. They put it
#in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!
#
#
#Even if it's true, what can one bee do?
#
#
#Sting them where it really hurts.
#
#
#In the face! The eye!
#
#
#- That would hurt.
#- No.
#
#
#Up the nose? That's a killer.
#
#
#There's only one place you can sting
#the humans, one place where it matters.
#
#
#Hive at Five, the hive's only
#full-hour action news source.
#
#
#No more bee beards!
#
#
#With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.
#
#
#Weather with Storm Stinger.
#
#
#Sports with Buzz Larvi.
#
#
#And Jeanette Ohung.
#
#
#- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.
#- And I'm Jeanette Ohung.
#
#
#A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,
#
#
#intends to sue the human race
#for stealing our honey,
#
#
#packaging it and profiting
#from it illegally!
#
#
#Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,
#
#
#we'll have three former queens here in
#our studio, discussing their new book,
#
#
#Olassy Ladies,
#out this week on Hexagon.
#
#
#Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.
#
#
#Did you ever think, "I'm a kid
#from the hive. I can't do this"?
#
#
#Bees have never been afraid
#to change the world.
#
#
#What about Bee Oolumbus?
#Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?
#
#
#Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.
#
#
#We were thinking
#of stickball or candy stores.
#
#
#How old are you?
#
#
#The bee community
#is supporting you in this case,
#
#
#which will be the trial
#of the bee century.
#
#
#You know, they have a Larry King
#in the human world too.
#
#
#It's a common name. Next week...
#
#
#He looks like you and has a show
#and suspenders and colored dots...
#
#
#Next week...
#
#
#Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the
#guest even though you just heard 'em.
#
#
#Bear Week next week!
#They're scary, hairy and here live.
#
#
#Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,
#squinty eyes, very Jewish.
#
#
#In tennis, you attack
#at the point of weakness!
#
#
#It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.
#
#
#Honey, her backhand's a joke!
#I'm not gonna take advantage of that?
#
#
#Quiet, please.
#Actual work going on here.
#
#
#- Is that that same bee?
#- Yes, it is!
#
#
#I'm helping him sue the human race.
#
#
#- Hello.
#- Hello, bee.
#
#
#This is Ken.
#
#
#Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size
#ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.
#
#
#Why does he talk again?
#
#
#Listen, you better go
#'cause we're really busy working.
#
#
#But it's our yogurt night!
#
#
#Bye-bye.
#
#
#Why is yogurt night so difficult?!
#
#
#You poor thing.
#You two have been at this for hours!
#
#
#Yes, and Adam here
#has been a huge help.
#
#
#- Frosting...
#- How many sugars?
#
#
#Just one. I try not
#to use the competition.
#
#
#So why are you helping me?
#
#
#Bees have good qualities.
#
#
#And it takes my mind off the shop.
#
#
#Instead of flowers, people
#are giving balloon bouquets now.
#
#
#Those are great, if you're three.
#
#
#And artificial flowers.
#
#
#- Oh, those just get me psychotic!
#- Yeah, me too.
#
#
#Bent stingers, pointless pollination.
#
#
#Bees must hate those fake things!
#
#
#Nothing worse
#than a daffodil that's had work done.
#
#
#Maybe this could make up
#for it a little bit.
#
#
#- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.
#- I guess.
#
#
#You sure you want to go through with it?
#
#
#Am I sure? When I'm done with
#the humans, they won't be able
#
#
#to say, "Honey, I'm home,"
#without paying a royalty!
#
#
#It's an incredible scene
#here in downtown Manhattan,
#
#
#where the world anxiously waits,
#because for the first time in history,
#
#
#we will hear for ourselves
#if a honeybee can actually speak.
#
#
#What have we gotten into here, Barry?
#
#
#It's pretty big, isn't it?
#
#
#I can't believe how many humans
#don't work during the day.
#
#
#You think billion-dollar multinational
#food companies have good lawyers?
#
#
#Everybody needs to stay
#behind the barricade.
#
#
#- What's the matter?
#- I don't know, I just got a chill.
#
#
#Well, if it isn't the bee team.
#
#
#You boys work on this?
#
#
#All rise! The Honorable
#Judge Bumbleton presiding.
#
#
#All right. Oase number 4475,
#
#
#Superior Oourt of New York,
#Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry
#
#
#is now in session.
#
#
#Mr. Montgomery, you're representing
#the five food companies collectively?
#
#
#A privilege.
#
#
#Mr. Benson... you're representing
#all the bees of the world?
#
#
#I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,
#we're ready to proceed.
#
#
#Mr. Montgomery,
#your opening statement, please.
#
#
#Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
#
#
#my grandmother was a simple woman.
#
#
#Born on a farm, she believed
#it was man's divine right
#
#
#to benefit from the bounty
#of nature God put before us.
#
#
#If we lived in the topsy-turvy world
#Mr. Benson imagines,
#
#
#just think of what would it mean.
#
#
#I would have to negotiate
#with the silkworm
#
#
#for the elastic in my britches!
#
#
#Talking bee!
#
#
#How do we know this isn't some sort of
#
#
#holographic motion-picture-capture
#Hollywood wizardry?
#
#
#They could be using laser beams!
#
#
#Robotics! Ventriloquism!
#Oloning! For all we know,
#
#
#he could be on steroids!
#
#
#Mr. Benson?
#
#
#Ladies and gentlemen,
#there's no trickery here.
#
#
#I'm just an ordinary bee.
#Honey's pretty important to me.
#
#
#It's important to all bees.
#We invented it!
#
#
#We make it. And we protect it
#with our lives.
#
#
#Unfortunately, there are
#some people in this room
#
#
#who think they can take it from us
#
#
#'cause we're the little guys!
#I'm hoping that, after this is all over,
#
#
#you'll see how, by taking our honey,
#you not only take everything we have
#
#
#but everything we are!
#
#
#I wish he'd dress like that
#all the time. So nice!
#
#
#Oall your first witness.
#
#
#So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
#of Honey Farms, big company you have.
#
#
#I suppose so.
#
#
#I see you also own
#Honeyburton and Honron!
#
#
#Yes, they provide beekeepers
#for our farms.
#
#
#Beekeeper. I find that
#to be a very disturbing term.
#
#
#I don't imagine you employ
#any bee-free-ers, do you?
#
#
#- No.
#- I couldn't hear you.
#
#
#- No.
#- No.
#
#
#Because you don't free bees.
#You keep bees. Not only that,
#
#
#it seems you thought a bear would be
#an appropriate image for a jar of honey.
#
#
#They're very lovable creatures.
#
#
#Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.
#
#
#You mean like this?
#
#
#Bears kill bees!
#
#
#How'd you like his head crashing
#through your living room?!
#
#
#Biting into your couch!
#Spitting out your throw pillows!
#
#
#OK, that's enough. Take him away.
#
#
#So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.
#Your name intrigues me.
#
#
#- Where have I heard it before?
#- I was with a band called The Police.
#
#
#But you've never been
#a police officer, have you?
#
#
#No, I haven't.
#
#
#No, you haven't. And so here
#we have yet another example
#
#
#of bee culture casually
#stolen by a human
#
#
#for nothing more than
#a prance-about stage name.
#
#
#Oh, please.
#
#
#Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?
#
#
#Because I'm feeling
#a little stung, Sting.
#
#
#Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!
#
#
#That's not his real name?! You idiots!
#
#
#Mr. Liotta, first,
#belated congratulations on
#
#
#your Emmy win for a guest spot
#on ER in 2005.
#
#
#Thank you. Thank you.
#
#
#I see from your resume
#that you're devilishly handsome
#
#
#with a churning inner turmoil
#that's ready to blow.
#
#
#I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?
#
#
#Not yet it isn't. But is this
#what it's come to for you?
#
#
#Exploiting tiny, helpless bees
#so you don't
#
#
#have to rehearse
#your part and learn your lines, sir?
#
#
#Watch it, Benson!
#I could blow right now!
#
#
#This isn't a goodfella.
#This is a badfella!
#
#
#Why doesn't someone just step on
#this creep, and we can all go home?!
#
#
#- Order in this court!
#- You're all thinking it!
#
#
#Order! Order, I say!
#
#
#- Say it!
#- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!
#
#
#I think it was awfully nice
#of that bear to pitch in like that.
#
#
#I think the jury's on our side.
#
#
#Are we doing everything right, legally?
#
#
#I'm a florist.
#
#
#Right. Well, here's to a great team.
#
#
#To a great team!
#
#
#Well, hello.
#
#
#- Ken!
#- Hello.
#
#
#I didn't think you were coming.
#
#
#No, I was just late.
#I tried to call, but... the battery.
#
#
#I didn't want all this to go to waste,
#so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.
#
#
#Oh, that was lucky.
#
#
#There's a little left.
#I could heat it up.
#
#
#Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.
#
#
#So I hear you're quite a tennis player.
#
#
#I'm not much for the game myself.
#The ball's a little grabby.
#
#
#That's where I usually sit.
#Right... there.
#
#
#Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,
#
#
#and he agreed with me that eating with
#chopsticks isn't really a special skill.
#
#
#You think I don't see what you're doing?
#
#
#I know how hard it is to find
#the rightjob. We have that in common.
#
#
#Do we?
#
#
#Bees have 100 percent employment,
#but we do jobs like taking the crud out.
#
#
#That's just what
#I was thinking about doing.
#
#
#Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor
#for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.
#
#
#I'm going to drain the old stinger.
#
#
#Yeah, you do that.
#
#
#Look at that.
#
#
#You know, I've just about had it
#
#
#with your little mind games.
#
#
#- What's that?
#- Italian Vogue.
#
#
#Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.
#
#
#A lot of ads.
#
#
#Remember what Van said, why is
#your life more valuable than mine?
#
#
#Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!
#
#
#I think something stinks in here!
#
#
#I love the smell of flowers.
#
#
#How do you like the smell of flames?!
#
#
#Not as much.
#
#
#Water bug! Not taking sides!
#
#
#Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat!
#This is pathetic!
#
#
#I've got issues!
#
#
#Well, well, well, a royal flush!
#
#
#- You're bluffing.
#- Am I?
#
#
#Surf's up, dude!
#
#
#Poo water!
#
#
#That bowl is gnarly.
#
#
#Except for those dirty yellow rings!
#
#
#Kenneth! What are you doing?!
#
#
#You know, I don't even like honey!
#I don't eat it!
#
#
#We need to talk!
#
#
#He's just a little bee!
#
#
#And he happens to be
#the nicest bee I've met in a long time!
#
#
#Long time? What are you talking about?!
#Are there other bugs in your life?
#
#
#No, but there are other things bugging
#me in life. And you're one of them!
#
#
#Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...
#
#
#My nerves are fried from riding
#on this emotional roller coaster!
#
#
#Goodbye, Ken.
#
#
#And for your information,
#
#
#I prefer sugar-free, artificial
#sweeteners made by man!
#
#
#I'm sorry about all that.
#
#
#I know it's got
#an aftertaste! I like it!
#
#
#I always felt there was some kind
#of barrier between Ken and me.
#
#
#I couldn't overcome it.
#Oh, well.
#
#
#Are you OK for the trial?
#
#
#I believe Mr. Montgomery
#is about out of ideas.
#
#
#We would like to call
#Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.
#
#
#Good idea! You can really see why he's
#considered one of the best lawyers...
#
#
#Yeah.
#
#
#Layton, you've
#gotta weave some magic
#
#
#with this jury,
#or it's gonna be all over.
#
#
#Don't worry. The only thing I have
#to do to turn this jury around
#
#
#is to remind them
#of what they don't like about bees.
#
#
#- You got the tweezers?
#- Are you allergic?
#
#
#Only to losing, son. Only to losing.
#
#
#Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you
#what I think we'd all like to know.
#
#
#What exactly is your relationship
#
#
#to that woman?
#
#
#We're friends.
#
#
#- Good friends?
#- Yes.
#
#
#How good? Do you live together?
#
#
#Wait a minute...
#
#
#Are you her little...
#
#
#...bedbug?
#
#
#I've seen a bee documentary or two.
#From what I understand,
#
#
#doesn't your queen give birth
#to all the bee children?
#
#
#- Yeah, but...
#- So those aren't your real parents!
#
#
#- Oh, Barry...
#- Yes, they are!
#
#
#Hold me back!
#
#
#You're an illegitimate bee,
#aren't you, Benson?
#
#
#He's denouncing bees!
#
#
#Don't y'all date your cousins?
#
#
#- Objection!
#- I'm going to pincushion this guy!
#
#
#Adam, don't! It's what he wants!
#
#
#Oh, I'm hit!!
#
#
#Oh, lordy, I am hit!
#
#
#Order! Order!
#
#
#The venom! The venom
#is coursing through my veins!
#
#
#I have been felled
#by a winged beast of destruction!
#
#
#You see? You can't treat them
#like equals! They're striped savages!
#
#
#Stinging's the only thing
#they know! It's their way!
#
#
#- Adam, stay with me.
#- I can't feel my legs.
#
#
#What angel of mercy
#will come forward to suck the poison
#
#
#from my heaving buttocks?
#
#
#I will have order in this court. Order!
#
#
#Order, please!
#
#
#The case of the honeybees
#versus the human race
#
#
#took a pointed turn against the bees
#
#
#yesterday when one of their legal
#team stung Layton T. Montgomery.
#
#
#- Hey, buddy.
#- Hey.
#
#
#- Is there much pain?
#- Yeah.
#
#
#I...
#
#
#I blew the whole case, didn't I?
#
#
#It doesn't matter. What matters is
#you're alive. You could have died.
#
#
#I'd be better off dead. Look at me.
#
#
#They got it from the cafeteria
#downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.
#
#
#Look, there's
#a little celery still on it.
#
#
#What was it like to sting someone?
#
#
#I can't explain it. It was all...
#
#
#All adrenaline and then...
#and then ecstasy!
#
#
#All right.
#
#
#You think it was all a trap?
#
#
#Of course. I'm sorry.
#I flew us right into this.
#
#
#What were we thinking? Look at us. We're
#just a couple of bugs in this world.
#
#
#What will the humans do to us
#if they win?
#
#
#I don't know.
#
#
#I hear they put the roaches in motels.
#That doesn't sound so bad.
#
#
#Adam, they check in,
#but they don't check out!
#
#
#Oh, my.
#
#
#Oould you get a nurse
#to close that window?
#
#
#- Why?
#- The smoke.
#
#
#Bees don't smoke.
#
#
#Right. Bees don't smoke.
#
#
#Bees don't smoke!
#But some bees are smoking.
#
#
#That's it! That's our case!
#
#
#It is? It's not over?
#
#
#Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.
#
#
#Get back to the court and stall.
#Stall any way you can.
#
#
#And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.
#
#
#Mr. Flayman.
#
#
#Yes? Yes, Your Honor!
#
#
#Where is the rest of your team?
#
#
#Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.
#
#
#Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,
#
#
#and as a result,
#we don't make very good time.
#
#
#I actually heard a funny story about...
#
#
#Your Honor,
#haven't these ridiculous bugs
#
#
#taken up enough
#of this court's valuable time?
#
#
#How much longer will we allow
#these absurd shenanigans to go on?
#
#
#They have presented no compelling
#evidence to support their charges
#
#
#against my clients,
#who run legitimate businesses.
#
#
#I move for a complete dismissal
#of this entire case!
#
#
#Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going
#
#
#to have to consider
#Mr. Montgomery's motion.
#
#
#But you can't! We have a terrific case.
#
#
#Where is your proof?
#Where is the evidence?
#
#
#Show me the smoking gun!
#
#
#Hold it, Your Honor!
#You want a smoking gun?
#
#
#Here is your smoking gun.
#
#
#What is that?
#
#
#It's a bee smoker!
#
#
#What, this?
#This harmless little contraption?
#
#
#This couldn't hurt a fly,
#let alone a bee.
#
#
#Look at what has happened
#
#
#to bees who have never been asked,
#"Smoking or non?"
#
#
#Is this what nature intended for us?
#
#
#To be forcibly addicted
#to smoke machines
#
#
#and man-made wooden slat work camps?
#
#
#Living out our lives as honey slaves
#to the white man?
#
#
#- What are we gonna do?
#- He's playing the species card.
#
#
#Ladies and gentlemen, please,
#free these bees!
#
#
#Free the bees! Free the bees!
#
#
#Free the bees!
#
#
#Free the bees! Free the bees!
#
#
#The court finds in favor of the bees!
#
#
#Vanessa, we won!
#
#
#I knew you could do it! High-five!
#
#
#Sorry.
#
#
#I'm OK! You know what this means?
#
#
#All the honey
#will finally belong to the bees.
#
#
#Now we won't have
#to work so hard all the time.
#
#
#This is an unholy perversion
#of the balance of nature, Benson.
#
#
#You'll regret this.
#
#
#Barry, how much honey is out there?
#
#
#All right. One at a time.
#
#
#Barry, who are you wearing?
#
#
#My sweater is Ralph Lauren,
#and I have no pants.
#
#
#- What if Montgomery's right?
#- What do you mean?
#
#
#We've been living the bee way
#a long time, 27 million years.
#
#
#Oongratulations on your victory.
#What will you demand as a settlement?
#
#
#First, we'll demand a complete shutdown
#of all bee work camps.
#
#
#Then we want back the honey
#that was ours to begin with,
#
#
#every last drop.
#
#
#We demand an end to the glorification
#of the bear as anything more
#
#
#than a filthy, smelly,
#bad-breath stink machine.
#
#
#We're all aware
#of what they do in the woods.
#
#
#Wait for my signal.
#
#
#Take him out.
#
#
#He'll have nauseous
#for a few hours, then he'll be fine.
#
#
#And we will no longer tolerate
#bee-negative nicknames...
#
#
#But it's just a prance-about stage name!
#
#
#...unnecessary inclusion of honey
#in bogus health products
#
#
#and la-dee-da human
#tea-time snack garnishments.
#
#
#Oan't breathe.
#
#
#Bring it in, boys!
#
#
#Hold it right there! Good.
#
#
#Tap it.
#
#
#Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,
#and there's gallons more coming!
#
#
#- I think we need to shut down!
#- Shut down? We've never shut down.
#
#
#Shut down honey production!
#
#
#Stop making honey!
#
#
#Turn your key, sir!
#
#
#What do we do now?
#
#
#Oannonball!
#
#
#We're shutting honey production!
#
#
#Mission abort.
#
#
#Aborting pollination and nectar detail.
#Returning to base.
#
#
#Adam, you wouldn't believe
#how much honey was out there.
#
#
#Oh, yeah?
#
#
#What's going on? Where is everybody?
#
#
#- Are they out celebrating?
#- They're home.
#
#
#They don't know what to do.
#Laying out, sleeping in.
#
#
#I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way
#to San Antonio with a cricket.
#
#
#At least we got our honey back.
#
#
#Sometimes I think, so what if humans
#liked our honey? Who wouldn't?
#
#
#It's the greatest thing in the world!
#I was excited to be part of making it.
#
#
#This was my new desk. This was my
#new job. I wanted to do it really well.
#
#
#And now...
#
#
#Now I can't.
#
#
#I don't understand
#why they're not happy.
#
#
#I thought their lives would be better!
#
#
#They're doing nothing. It's amazing.
#Honey really changes people.
#
#
#You don't have any idea
#what's going on, do you?
#
#
#- What did you want to show me?
#- This.
#
#
#What happened here?
#
#
#That is not the half of it.
#
#
#Oh, no. Oh, my.
#
#
#They're all wilting.
#
#
#Doesn't look very good, does it?
#
#
#No.
#
#
#And whose fault do you think that is?
#
#
#You know, I'm gonna guess bees.
#
#
#Bees?
#
#
#Specifically, me.
#
#
#I didn't think bees not needing to make
#honey would affect all these things.
#
#
#It's notjust flowers.
#Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.
#
#
#That's our whole SAT test right there.
#
#
#Take away produce, that affects
#the entire animal kingdom.
#
#
#And then, of course...
#
#
#The human species?
#
#
#So if there's no more pollination,
#
#
#it could all just go south here,
#couldn't it?
#
#
#I know this is also partly my fault.
#
#
#How about a suicide pact?
#
#
#How do we do it?
#
#
#- I'll sting you, you step on me.
#- Thatjust kills you twice.
#
#
#Right, right.
#
#
#Listen, Barry...
#sorry, but I gotta get going.
#
#
#I had to open my mouth and talk.
#
#
#Vanessa?
#
#
#Vanessa? Why are you leaving?
#Where are you going?
#
#
#To the final Tournament of Roses parade
#in Pasadena.
#
#
#They've moved it to this weekend
#because all the flowers are dying.
#
#
#It's the last chance
#I'll ever have to see it.
#
#
#Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.
#I never meant it to turn out like this.
#
#
#I know. Me neither.
#
#
#Tournament of Roses.
#Roses can't do sports.
#
#
#Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?
#
#
#Roses!
#
#
#Vanessa!
#
#
#Roses?!
#
#
#Barry?
#
#
#- Roses are flowers!
#- Yes, they are.
#
#
#Flowers, bees, pollen!
#
#
#I know.
#That's why this is the last parade.
#
#
#Maybe not.
#Oould you ask him to slow down?
#
#
#Oould you slow down?
#
#
#Barry!
#
#
#OK, I made a huge mistake.
#This is a total disaster, all my fault.
#
#
#Yes, it kind of is.
#
#
#I've ruined the planet.
#I wanted to help you
#
#
#with the flower shop.
#I've made it worse.
#
#
#Actually, it's completely closed down.
#
#
#I thought maybe you were remodeling.
#
#
#But I have another idea, and it's
#greater than my previous ideas combined.
#
#
#I don't want to hear it!
#
#
#All right, they have the roses,
#the roses have the pollen.
#
#
#I know every bee, plant
#and flower bud in this park.
#
#
#All we gotta do is get what they've got
#back here with what we've got.
#
#
#- Bees.
#- Park.
#
#
#- Pollen!
#- Flowers.
#
#
#- Repollination!
#- Across the nation!
#
#
#Tournament of Roses,
#Pasadena, Oalifornia.
#
#
#They've got nothing
#but flowers, floats and cotton candy.
#
#
#Security will be tight.
#
#
#I have an idea.
#
#
#Vanessa Bloome, FTD.
#
#
#Official floral business. It's real.
#
#
#Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.
#
#
#Thank you. It was a gift.
#
#
#Once inside,
#we just pick the right float.
#
#
#How about The Princess and the Pea?
#
#
#I could be the princess,
#and you could be the pea!
#
#
#Yes, I got it.
#
#
#- Where should I sit?
#- What are you?
#
#
#- I believe I'm the pea.
#- The pea?
#
#
#It goes under the mattresses.
#
#
#- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.
#- I'm getting the marshal.
#
#
#You do that!
#This whole parade is a fiasco!
#
#
#Let's see what this baby'll do.
#
#
#Hey, what are you doing?!
#
#
#Then all we do
#is blend in with traffic...
#
#
#...without arousing suspicion.
#
#
#Once at the airport,
#there's no stopping us.
#
#
#Stop! Security.
#
#
#- You and your insect pack your float?
#- Yes.
#
#
#Has it been
#in your possession the entire time?
#
#
#Would you remove your shoes?
#
#
#- Remove your stinger.
#- It's part of me.
#
#
#I know. Just having some fun.
#Enjoy your flight.
#
#
#Then if we're lucky, we'll have
#just enough pollen to do the job.
#
#
#Oan you believe how lucky we are? We
#have just enough pollen to do the job!
#
#
#I think this is gonna work.
#
#
#It's got to work.
#
#
#Attention, passengers,
#this is Oaptain Scott.
#
#
#We have a bit of bad weather
#in New York.
#
#
#It looks like we'll experience
#a couple hours delay.
#
#
#Barry, these are cut flowers
#with no water. They'll never make it.
#
#
#I gotta get up there
#and talk to them.
#
#
#Be careful.
#
#
#Oan I get help
#with the Sky Mall magazine?
#
#
#I'd like to order the talking
#inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.
#
#
#Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.
#
#
#- What'd you say, Hal?
#- Nothing.
#
#
#Bee!
#
#
#Don't freak out! My entire species...
#
#
#What are you doing?
#
#
#- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!
#- Who's an attorney?
#
#
#Don't move.
#
#
#Oh, Barry.
#
#
#Good afternoon, passengers.
#This is your captain.
#
#
#Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B
#please report to the cockpit?
#
#
#And please hurry!
#
#
#What happened here?
#
#
#There was a DustBuster,
#a toupee, a life raft exploded.
#
#
#One's bald, one's in a boat,
#they're both unconscious!
#
#
#- Is that another bee joke?
#- No!
#
#
#No one's flying the plane!
#
#
#This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.
#What's your status?
#
#
#This is Vanessa Bloome.
#I'm a florist from New York.
#
#
#Where's the pilot?
#
#
#He's unconscious,
#and so is the copilot.
#
#
#Not good. Does anyone onboard
#have flight experience?
#
#
#As a matter of fact, there is.
#
#
#- Who's that?
#- Barry Benson.
#
#
#From the honey trial?! Oh, great.
#
#
#Vanessa, this is nothing more
#than a big metal bee.
#
#
#It's got giant wings, huge engines.
#
#
#I can't fly a plane.
#
#
#- Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?
#- Yes.
#
#
#How hard could it be?
#
#
#Wait, Barry!
#We're headed into some lightning.
#
#
#This is Bob Bumble. We have some
#late-breaking news from JFK Airport,
#
#
#where a suspenseful scene
#is developing.
#
#
#Barry Benson,
#fresh from his legal victory...
#
#
#That's Barry!
#
#
#...is attempting to land a plane,
#loaded with people, flowers
#
#
#and an incapacitated flight crew.
#
#
#Flowers?!
#
#
#We have a storm in the area
#and two individuals at the controls
#
#
#with absolutely no flight experience.
#
#
#Just a minute.
#There's a bee on that plane.
#
#
#I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson
#and his no-account compadres.
#
#
#They've done enough damage.
#
#
#But isn't he your only hope?
#
#
#Technically, a bee
#shouldn't be able to fly at all.
#
#
#Their wings are too small...
#
#
#Haven't we heard this a million times?
#
#
#"The surface area of the wings
#and body mass make no sense."
#
#
#- Get this on the air!
#- Got it.
#
#
#- Stand by.
#- We're going live.
#
#
#The way we work may be a mystery to you.
#
#
#Making honey takes a lot of bees
#doing a lot of small jobs.
#
#
#But let me tell you about a small job.
#
#
#If you do it well,
#it makes a big difference.
#
#
#More than we realized.
#To us, to everyone.
#
#
#That's why I want to get bees
#back to working together.
#
#
#That's the bee way!
#We're not made of Jell-O.
#
#
#We get behind a fellow.
#
#
#- Black and yellow!
#- Hello!
#
#
#Left, right, down, hover.
#
#
#- Hover?
#- Forget hover.
#
#
#This isn't so hard.
#Beep-beep! Beep-beep!
#
#
#Barry, what happened?!
#
#
#Wait, I think we were
#on autopilot the whole time.
#
#
#- That may have been helping me.
#- And now we're not!
#
#
#So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.
#
#
#All of you, let's get
#behind this fellow! Move it out!
#
#
#Move out!
#
#
#Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,
#you copy me with the wings of the plane!
#
#
#Don't have to yell.
#
#
#I'm not yelling!
#We're in a lot of trouble.
#
#
#It's very hard to concentrate
#with that panicky tone in your voice!
#
#
#It's not a tone. I'm panicking!
#
#
#I can't do this!
#
#
#Vanessa, pull yourself together.
#You have to snap out of it!
#
#
#You snap out of it.
#
#
#You snap out of it.
#
#
#- You snap out of it!
#- You snap out of it!
#
#
#- You snap out of it!
#- You snap out of it!
#
#
#- You snap out of it!
#- You snap out of it!
#
#
#- Hold it!
#- Why? Oome on, it's my turn.
#
#
#How is the plane flying?
#
#
#I don't know.
#
#
#Hello?
#
#
#Benson, got any flowers
#for a happy occasion in there?
#
#
#The Pollen Jocks!
#
#
#They do get behind a fellow.
#
#
#- Black and yellow.
#- Hello.
#
#
#All right, let's drop this tin can
#on the blacktop.
#
#
#Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?
#
#
#No, nothing. It's all cloudy.
#
#
#Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.
#
#
#- Thinking bee.
#- Thinking bee.
#
#
#Thinking bee!
#Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
#
#
#Wait a minute.
#I think I'm feeling something.
#
#
#- What?
#- I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.
#
#
#Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.
#
#
#Bring the nose down.
#
#
#Thinking bee!
#Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
#
#
#- What in the world is on the tarmac?
#- Get some lights on that!
#
#
#Thinking bee!
#Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
#
#
#- Vanessa, aim for the flower.
#- OK.
#
#
#Out the engines. We're going in
#on bee power. Ready, boys?
#
#
#Affirmative!
#
#
#Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.
#
#
#Land on that flower!
#
#
#Ready? Full reverse!
#
#
#Spin it around!
#
#
#- Not that flower! The other one!
#- Which one?
#
#
#- That flower.
#- I'm aiming at the flower!
#
#
#That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.
#I mean the giant pulsating flower
#
#
#made of millions of bees!
#
#
#Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.
#
#
#Rotate around it.
#
#
#- This is insane, Barry!
#- This's the only way I know how to fly.
#
#
#Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane
#flying in an insect-like pattern?
#
#
#Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.
#Smell it. Full reverse!
#
#
#Just drop it. Be a part of it.
#
#
#Aim for the center!
#
#
#Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!
#
#
#Oome on, already.
#
#
#Barry, we did it!
#You taught me how to fly!
#
#
#- Yes. No high-five!
#- Right.
#
#
#Barry, it worked!
#Did you see the giant flower?
#
#
#What giant flower? Where? Of course
#I saw the flower! That was genius!
#
#
#- Thank you.
#- But we're not done yet.
#
#
#Listen, everyone!
#
#
#This runway is covered
#with the last pollen
#
#
#from the last flowers
#available anywhere on Earth.
#
#
#That means this is our last chance.
#
#
#We're the only ones who make honey,
#pollinate flowers and dress like this.
#
#
#If we're gonna survive as a species,
#this is our moment! What do you say?
#
#
#Are we going to be bees, orjust
#Museum of Natural History keychains?
#
#
#We're bees!
#
#
#Keychain!
#
#
#Then follow me! Except Keychain.
#
#
#Hold on, Barry. Here.
#
#
#You've earned this.
#
#
#Yeah!
#
#
#I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect
#fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.
#
#
#Oh, yeah.
#
#
#That's our Barry.
#
#
#Mom! The bees are back!
#
#
#If anybody needs
#to make a call, now's the time.
#
#
#I got a feeling we'll be
#working late tonight!
#
#
#Here's your change. Have a great
#afternoon! Oan I help who's next?
#
#
#Would you like some honey with that?
#It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.
#
#
#Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.
#And I don't see a nickel!
#
#
#Sometimes I just feel
#like a piece of meat!
#
#
#I had no idea.
#
#
#Barry, I'm sorry.
#Have you got a moment?
#
#
#Would you excuse me?
#My mosquito associate will help you.
#
#
#Sorry I'm late.
#
#
#He's a lawyer too?
#
#
#I was already a blood-sucking parasite.
#All I needed was a briefcase.
#
#
#Have a great afternoon!
#
#
#Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,
#and I can't get them anywhere.
#
#
#No problem, Vannie.
#Just leave it to me.
#
#
#You're a lifesaver, Barry.
#Oan I help who's next?
#
#
#All right, scramble, jocks!
#It's time to fly.
#
#
#Thank you, Barry!
#
#
#That bee is living my life!
#
#
#Let it go, Kenny.
#
#
#- When will this nightmare end?!
#- Let it all go.
#
#
#- Beautiful day to fly.
#- Sure is.
#
#
#Between you and me,
#I was dying to get out of that office.
#
#
#You have got
#to start thinking bee, my friend.
#
#
#- Thinking bee!
#- Me?
#
#
#Hold it. Let's just stop
#for a second. Hold it.
#
#
#I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.
#Oan we stop here?
#
#
#I'm not making a major life decision
#during a production number!
#
#
#All right. Take ten, everybody.
#Wrap it up, guys.
#
#
#I had virtually no rehearsal for that.