A list of crops

Agriculture is always a little bit of a gamble in a high magic area like the valley. Sometimes you get perfectly normal apples, but one in a hundred is blue or muses on the philosophical nature of pie. Sometimes you get pop squash, which we cannot discuss here until court proceedings are finalized and the township of Havenbrook is found, but which we advise against growing. And sometimes, sometimes you get Unmangoes.
 Lycia is too far north for the elven crops that dot the landscape around Dejune, but is far enough north to get all the weird Valley crops, plus a few of the dwarven ones. Below is a small sample of what grows in the area:
=== Blargle Melon ===
A sprawling ground vine with large hairy leaves that produces melons year round the size of a human fist and mottled yellow and green. They're mildly toxic to most creatures but are widely cultivated for another purpose. Their seeds spread via explosive dehisance, which is triggered by pressure on the vines or leaves - a footstep by a small or larger creature will cause any ripe fruit to violently explode with an incredibly lound sound described as being like a giant aggressively vomiting. Farmers thus plant them at high densities around their homesteads and amongst their crops to serve as intruder alarms.
=== The Desert Snow Hibiscus ===
The Desert Snow Hibiscus is a standard hibiscus bush producing large white flowers that fade to blue or purple towards the centre. Normally grown as an ornamental plant, it can be grown as a crop for a very specific use. Due to some strange element of this plant’s nectar, bees that feed from it will produce green honey with a very distinct flavour. The name and value of this green honey is based on a gradient. The lowest is known as hibiscus honey, made from 40% or less of hibiscus nectar, it has a light green colour and only a subtle difference in flavour from regular honey. On the other end is Jade Honey, considered an expensive delicacy by the nobility, it is made from 80% or higher hibiscus nectar, has a deep green colour and a very different flavour from regular honey. It is said that in the deserts to the north some of the smaller oasis’s have been stripped of all other plants but the desert snow hibiscus, so that it’s cultivars can ensure that their bees produce 100% pure Jade Honey. Those of particularly refined tastes can have their Jade Honey brewed into a rare and expensive mead known as Jade Wine. The Desert Snow Hibiscus has been successfully grown in the valley as an ornamental plant, and is a potential crop for Lycia. However, drawing value from this crop in such a green and wild area would be another matter entirely. 
=== Dire Garlic ===
Growing to the size of a human head, these bulbs are values for their ability to add flavor to any savory dish. Growing them is another matter entirely however. Dire Garlic is a hardy plant with animate roots and stem that will put up a vicious assault against anyone trying to harvest it. Particularly unruly crops have been known to only be able to be defeated with the aid of a silver sickle, and many farmers have long scars from particularly aggressive varieties.
A dire garlic bulb is a light grey, coming from the layer of calcium deposits it builds up, resembling a crude exoskeleton.
=== Gallowsberry Vine ===
The Gallowsberry Vine is a staple of frontier farming in the north, as well as a grim reminder of the realities of life in and around the expanse, contrary to the name the fruits of the vine are in fact legumes which be conveniently dried on the vine before harvesting, which increases the unnerving nature of the plant as the dried beans rattle inside the skull-like pod. Despite the superstition and initial wariness surrounding the vine it has proved to be a nutritious and filling staple, with the added benefit of coming off the vine ready to be stored for the long winter months.
=== Glaric potato ===
A knotty grey tuber that grows underground to the size of a human's head, though with more of a dumbbell like shape. It never produces leaves and the only sign of its existence above-ground is a single flower stalk that appears in spring with a cluster of tiny purple flowers on it. To grow it, you need to to break up the tubers, bury them and then let grass grow over the top - if you're clever you mark the location with stakes. Named because it's a hearty starch crop like regular potatoes but scholars will tell you if you care to listen that it's in fact a type of orchid and gathers it's nutrition by leaching it from the grass growing on top of it.
=== Glaivemint ===
Glaivemint, aka Freya's Claws: This light blue herb is named for the distinct shape of its leaves; long and thin, with one straight edge and one curved, coming to a sharp point. It is a hardy plant, which can grow in most conditions, but is extremely slow to spread naturally. Its presence throughout the settled areas of the Valley is largely due to the efforts of the Freyan processions, which cultivate it around roads and outside settlements - along with a few other significant plants - as they travel. The herb has not found widespread culinary use, but it is an exceptionally potent phytoestrogen, and sees ritualistic use in creating Freya's Brew, and medicinal use by herbalists and midwives for birth control, and for treating a number of hormonal conditions. The herb has an extremely strong mint flavour, off-putting to most animals, through this is softened by boiling the leaves. Those harvesting the plant without proper care or equipment may suffer some minor cuts and scrapes. 
=== Glowfruit ===
Glowfruit are an uncommon fruit found mostly amongst older Elvish communities. Believed to be first cultivated by a hierophant druid sometime in the 4th age, they appear as a regular apple tree which bears an apple with a light green skin. The fruit is on the tarter side, and best served stewed or in a pie. 
It gets its name from the appearance of the fruit, which appear to glow various colours and aura strengths when viewed through detect magic. The magically gifted often take to walking through the orchards when they are heavy with fruit, appreciating the rainbow beauty of the trees.
The glowfruit is also the focus of a type of folk prophesy. A person who wants their fortune told will pick an apple and take it to a seer, who will cast a fortune based on the colour and strength of the aura. Strong necromancy is tied to impending doom, while weak evocation indicates minor squabbles with friends and family and so on.
Although slightly magical in nature, the fruit themselves are safe to eat and have no use as magic components or the like, beyond that of a normal apple
=== Honey Pods ===
The honey pod is a most unusual fruit. The tree is fairly easy to cultivate, fast growing and not overly large, yet it is rarely grown as a commercial crop due to the added difficulty of getting value from the fruit. In its natural form, the fruit has a hard almost leathery skin, and a flavor that has most often been described as "getting kicked in the wobbly bits while sucking on rotten liver". However, if left on the tree to over ripen, the fruit attract a particular species of fly who's eggs are laid into the fruit. Once hatched, the larvae consume the flesh of the fruit and eventually mature and fly away, leaving behind a delicious syrup that can be drunk, used on foods or as a flavor in cooking, and can produce a subtle yet alluring mead. The only downside to the flys is that during the laying period, their mating sounds uncomfortably indistinguishable from the cry of a newborn baby, and this can continue for several weeks across a whole crop. Not to mention some customers balk at the syrup once they discover it's origins. 
But for those who can overlook these minor hiccups, they are a fine crop.
=== Milk Teeth ===
When you live in a land that is all but devoid of livestock you need to find alternative sources of of nutrition to fill the void, enter this short, stout & hardy breed of corn known locally as Milk Teeth, these calciferous ears of white corn have the appearance of molars jutting from a cob and, although they are all but inedible in their natural form, they serve a dual purpose upon harvest. When they are crushed they release a milk-like substance with a high calcium content but little flavour, once the liquid has been pressed from the kernels the remainder can be dried and milled into a flour-like substance that produces breads and pastry with a slightly chalky texture that some find unpleasant and others, usually those who grew up eating it, claim have a superior crust to those produced with wheat flour. It is also Gluten Free.
=== Muttle ===
A bright green aquatic plant made of a long, trailing stem covered in many small curling leaves. It grows in flowing waterways, and can be cultivated by attaching young plants to a trellis which is then lowered into a river or stream, and bought back up once the plants have matured. The stem and leaves of the muttle can be eaten, either fresh from the water or cooked. It is said to have a crisp texture and a not unpleasant taste (how good that taste is depends on who you ask), though after cooking it softens considerably. Used to growing in warm climates, it flowers twice a year. The flowers grow on long stalks that extend out of the water. They bloom at night and glow to attract the various nocturnal insects that pollinate it.
=== Pears ===
Pear trees grow all over Lycia. They're thick, leafy trees that are evergreen and produce fruit year round. These same pear trees when transplanted outside of the Greenbelt become deciduous and produce fruit only in summer and autumn.
=== Stout Burgundy ===
The Stout Burgundy is a hardy maple tree characterised by its vividly purple foliage and unusual short and thick stature. The tree is highly valued for its purple/maroon sap, which can be refined into a syrup that tastes alarmingly like a fine port. Wines, whiskeys and the like aged in barrels made of the Burgundy's wood gain a note of its warm flavour. The sap is harvested by tapping the trees in spring.
=== Unmangoes ===
The unmango is a fruit no one can remember first discovering. The best theory is that a farmer with an entirely normal mango plantation had a snake problem and he (unknowingly) brought in Time Stoats to hunt them, rather than the more traditional kind. All that is known for sure is that should you consume an unmango you will find yourself thoroughly unsatisfied. They have almost no flavor, and no matter how many you eat, you will not be filled. That is, unless you then take the seed and plant it. For you see, approximately 6-8 months after planting, once a robust and surprisingly fast growing tree (for those comparing them to normal mangoes) has appeared, the consumer of the unmango will find themselves struck with the unmistakable flavour of the tropical delight, not to mention the nutritional and filling effects (best not to eat many in a single sitting, unlike the infamous Swollen Pete). It is for these reason they are most popular with sailors, who after a long time at sea can often use the surprising flavour, not to mention the added boost against scurvy.
=== Werewolf flower ===
Turns you into a werewolf if you eat it. I don't know why anyone would grow this
=== Yam weed ===
A short ground plant with wide leaves on the end of thick stalks, similar in look to rhubarb or celery. It is easy to grow and cultivate, especially in areas like the valley, and makes a fine staple crop. The leaves are not consumable by humanoids and are normally used as animal feed, composted, or simply thrown out. The thick stalks are yam like in texture, and extremely nutritious, adding to it’s benefit as a staple crop. Unfortunately the flavour is indescribably bland, one botanist once described it as “So boring in flavour it is actually difficult to consume”. Therefore it is best used to round out more flavourful fare, and is often used as filler in soups, stews and other such dishes. The main dish made out of yam-weed is the “yam-fry”, where the stalks are grated, mixed in a thin batter that has been flavoured with salt and spices, and fried into patties. Yam-fries can be eaten on their own or as a side dish to a larger meal.
==== Yarlup Plum ====
Simply called yarlups in their native land, they are a small pink and yellow stone fruit that grows on the yarlup tree. The fruit naturally falls off the tree when it reaches peak ripeness, and so is easily harvested by arranging nets beneath the tree to catch the fruit. The yarlups' flesh has a fine perfume, but is of a hard, difficult texture, with an unpleasant taste, and is generally considered not good to eat. However when properly processed and fermented it produces a flavourful - and potent - liquor. The liquor retains the fruit's fetching pink colour, and is commonly known as yarlup wine, though it's relation to actual wine is loose at best.