MOONLIGHT INCORPORATED

Hee-Hee-Hee, welcome kiddies!  It is me, your MAGGOT-GAGGING-GHOST-HOST, CREEPS!  Why, I've been looking for TENNIS HACKET to HACK AROUND A FEW TENNIS BALLS WITH heh-heh-heh-heh!  But while I find it, you kiddies BE GOOD SPORTS and enjoy this FESTERING-FIRST SERVING OF SLIME that I call...
On an April night back in 1976, a girl was asleep in a bungalow down in Alabama.  The phone rang in the living-room and her bedroom was off of it.  She woke and picked it up.  "Hello" she yawned.  "Sally Roberts.  This is Moonlight Incorporated.  I see y'all are having some problems in school.  I am offering my services to fix them for y'all" a man's voice very gruff spoke over the phone.  "How do you know my name mister?  Who are y'all by the way too?" the girl questioned him.  The guy hung up on her then.  
Sally Roberts was on the school bus the very next day, and she got off at a grade school.  "Hey, Sally, howdy.  C'mon with me before Todd and Sam catch y'all" another girl called to her by the playground swings.  "Howdy, Charity.  I'm comin' now" Sally called back to her.  She ran and joined Charity, but then two teenage bullies rode their bikes over to them.  "Hey, howdy, girls.  Playin' Patty Cake eh?" one bully mocked Sally and Charity.  "Ah, Todd, leave us alone" Sally begged him.  "Awe, y'all are gonna cry, eh, Sam?" Todd mocked Sally, then laughed to the other bully.  "Ha, yeah, Todd" Sam chuckled.  Both Todd and Sam pushed the girls to the pavement and rode away on their bikes.  
Charity and Sally were caught by Sam and Todd that afternoon on the playground.  They broke Sally and Charity's arms.  As the girls cried in pain, the bullies fled on their bicycles.  That night, Sally wore a cast and was lying in bed.  The telephone rang.  When Sally picked up the phone, the man with the gruff -voice stated: "I am sorry you and your Friend got your arms broken by Sam and Todd, Sally.  I promise as the owner of Moonlight Incorporated, I will get them for you and your Friend."  Sally then heard him hang up.  
Meanwhile, Sam and Todd were drinking bottles of Jameson out, in Sally's neighborhood.  A green van parked by the sidewalk where they were at.  A bald man in a yellow t-shirt, black jeans and brown boots emerged from it.  He was missing eyes and his flesh was decomposing.  He stabbed Sam and Todd in the darkness with a knife.  Sally's phone rang and when Charity answered it in her cast, the man muttered, "you girls have a fun sleepover.  I took care of Todd and Sam for y'all."  He hung up in a shop, and the zombie poked the noses of Todd and Sam's corpses on the table with a fork.  
Found it.  Now, with a game of tennis, I can surely MAKE A BIT OF A RACKET, eh?  Ha-Ha-Ha.  Moonlight Incorporated really took a STAB AT IT with Todd and Sam ha-ha!  That zombie was quite DEAD ON TARGET with his business too.  It was so nice of him that he SLAYED A PROMISE TO SALLY on the TELE-GROAN, and then SCARE-RRIED IT OUT aha-ha-ha-ha-ha!