Hex

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Halloween, 1996
Learning to resurrect the dead could take a long time. Remy might not want me to do that. If he was still upset with me that could lead to problems.
I do not wish for The King's world. Reeves' passing was unfortunate, but it would DOES not warrant the doom of others. I will find a way to break Richard. I will inflict great pain on him. I will seek his Keeper, and take council from Him.
My error was in underestimating Richard. It will not happen again. I will make this the Town He Does Not Leave. I will make Reeves' grave be Richard's own. Then, perhaps, if it so behooves me, I will learn to raise the dead, so that his torment is extended.
I may buy back the memories of Todd the Lion. He may be of some use. Reeves did not want to leave the freehold. Humans live on after death through the memories others keep, I see no limitation for fetches. I will stay in his place, then.
Veterinary and suburban life were quaint ideas, but those Desires no longer serve me. My skills I must trade for better.
I felt it begin while I was still writing. It started with a metallic taste in my mouth. I thought it was blood, and it was. I heard my pulse pounding in my ears, and I thought it was Sorrow come to cover me like a blanket, though it'd be cold and rough, not like- I wept for Odin, why wouldn't I cry for Reeves? Tears didn't come, though my heart felt heavier, full of...
You're full of worms!
Ah. I almost smiled, but it faded fast. I focused on what I'd said before that.
I guess it's... what on the inside that counts?
Had I misspoke? I thought of the fetches I knew. Pat was a cold tin soldier. Jack was rotten. Mojo... Hm.
I stared at the turned dirt. R-
Re-
My mind was all gears grinding the wrong way. I could almost hear the motor whining, all slathered in black grease that wasn't doing anyone any good.
People die. They died because I didn't do anything, and they died because I did.
In all fairness, cool reason assured me as I sat back on my elbows and watched the stark hotel against ashen clouds, More people died when I did nothing. Father's attack. Stonefather's attack. They'd happened because of things I hadn't done.
They were going to happen anyway, something shrilled back. What a weird noise. This is different! This-
The motor whined louder, This was, the cogs strove against each other, This was ALL YOUR, something clunked.
I twisted up my mouth, picking at the idea that I didn't like, refusing to fully acknowledge it. Reeves would probably like it if I stayed for a while, but after that, she was right. I supposed I didn't have any business being around. Wasn't that a fair compromise?
Something was screaming, but I just went back to thinking. I wondered if my entire reproductive system was worth anything on the market. I was just a fetch, after all. I wondered which memories I would sell, and glanced at my journal.
You aren't sane. You aren't safe for anyone to be around!
I wasn't sure how I'd gotten curled up on my side, but I frowned at the whining that seemed to come from my own mouth. It came choppy. No, people weren't safe either way. Whether I was there or not, it was going to happen at some point. Richard would have come eventually. I kept saying it, like a mantra. I had to block it or I'd be useless.
In my head, Violet tapped Richard's shoulder. More useless, I amended.
I gave up. I bled away into soft earth, where I should have gone months ago. I laid there, cold and alone, while something picked the rest of me up. I stayed on the ground, and my beaten body stood over me. Remy, I could think, away from myself. It thumbed open a little boxcutter, I heard the click. Red droplets fell through me.
"I'm not forgetting," My souless mouth told me or the headstone, and dropped a third of my left ear next to the dirt. "I'm prioritizing."
Blood streamed down the Harvest King's neck, and her fingers grasped the other ear and sliced through it. She was clipping them, to be the way they actually were.
"I love you."
How? I wondered, amazed and disgusted. You can't even say his name.
I didn't apologize, because that would have been an insult. I tossed my other piece of flesh to the ground, and left Guilt in the dirt. I didn't need it, whether I was going to Hell as demon or damned. I didn't say goodbye. It wasn't good, and there was no point in "bye," either. Until next time, Reeves.
Category:Fiction