Kalera

Kalera is a sad, sad Ooze Mephit Cleric of Obad-Hai that somehow got sold from the Elemental Plane of Water into Neogi slavery to Neax Hiss. When she's not being generally depressed or trying to help the party in whatever way possible, she can be seen attempting to purchase her way to freedom, adopting "misused objects" (read: trash) and giving them homes, or sleeping in water barrels covered in winter blankets. __TOC__
== Appearance ==
Kalera, being an Ooze Mephit, is a rather interesting sight to behold. Her form is that of a humanoid female, standing at about 4'9" and weighing only 43 pounds. Her weight ties into her most distinctive feature - her hair and body are primarily composed of air and a large quantity of purple, gelatinous ooze. In general, her form stays together rather well; however, if she goes too long without properly maintaining herself, her body begins to expel whatever outside substances have polluted her. For this reason, she tries to keep herself as clean as possible; however, in the event that she is unable to stay away from sources of pollution, it's not uncommon to see dirt or a green tinge in her body.
Her facial expressions can be generally summed up as "gloomy," ranging from her general ":<" to a dismal "D:", and her bodily language expresses this general sadness very well. Even her voice is melancholy and sickly, since her state of existence is essentially affected by a perpetual flu. She's actual an able dancer, and her movements have a certain odd grace to them (even if they're not particularly nimble). She can usually be found in a suit of spiked full plate, wielding a spiked shield and a morningstar. There has been speculation as to the many spikes she surrounds herself with; however, the best guess so far is that "she just likes spikes."
== Personality ==
Don't let the spikes or slime mislead you - Kalera is actually an incredibly kind person. In general, her actions focus on helping the people around her, or making the world a better place in whatever way she can. She's selfless to a fault, partially thanks to mildly self-deprecating tendencies. (Hearing people's reactions to "the sewer elemental" tends to whittle away little by little at any self-esteem.) In general, if something she can do will help someone else more than her, she'll take that option. She's definitely not suicidal or an idiot, though - she'll do what's necessary to save her own skin, provided it won't hurt anyone else. She likes seeing peace and harmony, especially within her own party. (Good luck in the Hall of Many Things, eh?)
 She's very calm, having taken the "Detached" trait for flavor purposes, and often attempts to act as the voice of reason in a largely Chaotic world. She has no problems with retreating - however, if the party refuses to go along, Kalera will stay in the interests of keeping everyone alive. She's also willing to take the actions necessary to keep people alive and going, provided that they don't outright hurt anyone else. In general, she happens to be rather ambivalent on most subjects. After all, taking sides just hurts people, right?She has an odd habit of "adopting misused items," or picking up trash and storing it in a bag. Occasionally, she finds new homes for these items - if there is a place an item would fit well, she might let it run free. This is an easily explainable habit; as a being primarily made of pollution, seeing trash like herself discarded only serves to hurt her feelings. As she'd rather not be thrown to the side of the road, she takes it upon herself to make sure nothing else is either.
She's not fond of the whole "slave" issue, even if she's grown rather accustomed to it by now, and is constantly searching for ways to to get out of it. Breaking out or running away is out of the question - after all, it's not really like it's hurting her. So until she is freed by her captors or buys her freedom, she's stuck where she is - as a slave of the Neogi.
Finally, though she probably wouldn't admit it up front, Kalera has an incredibly developed, stereotypical romantic ideal. She would love nothing more than to be rescued from her current life and carried away by some dashing hero or heroine - she's not particularly picky, having no genuine sexuality to speak of. Sadly, she also realizes that the chances of finding someone to sweep an Ooze off her feet are rather low. This is largely the product of being introduced to humanoid culture through books, reading whatever she could in what time she found. She understands most humanoid concepts and social structures, even if her own views on those topic aren't necessarily the social norm.
== Abilities ==
Kalera, being a both a Cleric of the Healing / Water domains and an Ooze Mephit, has a number of unique abilities. Most of the cleric abilities relate, as her domains might suggest, to the concepts of healing and protecting others. She also currently has access to up to 2nd level spells on the Cleric spell list. Her Mephit abilities, however, are much more unique; she is able to hurl blobs of acid at her opponents, exhale acidic substances as a breath weapon, and emit a stinking cloud on a daily basis. She's also quite naturally skilled in several areas - namely, Swim, Spot, Concentration, and Bluff. (She doesn't have Perform: Dance yet, as much as I'd like it. B-bawwww.) Her armor class is relatively nice, too, at a quite lovely 26 in most situations.
She doesn't generally fight with weapons, choosing the "hug them until they stop" method instead. Considering her massive +12 to grappling as a level 3 Cleric, this is rather viable!
Her Will Save is quite impressive (+10 as a 3rd level Cleric), and she is a reasonable voice in an almost purely Chaotic party. Her stats are in the following order of powerful (highest to lowest) - Intellect/Wisdom, Strength/Charisma, Constitution, Dexterity.
== Weaknesses ==
As might be deduced from her stats, she's not exactly fast. Thanks to horrible rolls, her HP is much lower than average as well. Finally, she has severe problems hitting things, with a +6 to melee and a +4 to missile. As it turns out, being made of ooze/jelly and having a spine to match makes speaking up / acting in combat rather difficult. Kalera also has a rather nasty habit of getting caught in situations that she really shouldn't be in, if only because she's willing to take the fall above other characters. She also doesn't like offending anyone, which makes taking sides rather difficult.
== History ==
Approximately forty-eight years ago, Kalera got abducted from the Elemental Plane of Water by Neax Hiss. She was immediately enslaved, and set about fulfilling two goals: buying her own freedom (so she could help people, including herself), and reading as many books and texts as she can find (so she can learn more). Naturally, this third option conflicts slightly with the second one, so the whole "purchase her freedom" part has been going a little slow.
Reading all these texts - arcane textbooks, spellbooks, but especially fiction - have had an interesting effect on Kalera. As the years passed, she began to develop in the direction of human society, quickly grasping concepts such as beauty, romance and gender. It was through these concepts that Kalera assumed the form she still uses today. Eventually, her studies led her in the direction of the clergy, and she decided to become a Cleric of Saalim (also known as Obad-hai on the Prime Material Plane). After all, divine energies would allow her to heal and assist people with whatever problems they might be having. Of course, this still didn't help her raise money to buy her freedom with, and forty-eight years passed with Kalera slowly accumulating money.
In 1441, Neax Hiss sent Kalera to accompany and protect a Neogi Sorceror by the name of [Insert Name Here?] on his journey through the Hall of Many Things. Realizing that A) this would provide an adventure, something from which she could gain knowledge and B) she could help the party, Kalera gladly went about her new mission: keeping the party alive through a sadist's dungeon. What riches will she encounter? Will Kalera be able to buy her freedom, and will she ever see the Elemental Plane of Water again?
We'll just have to see, now won't we?
== In Eon ==
I haven't played her yet, so I wouldn't know!
== Relationships==
=== Apple Slaad ===
Another neat outsider, even if Kalera never quite got what it was that he was trying to do. He was certainly prone to odd outbursts, and seemed more interested in his own affairs than the party's. However, he ended up helping out several times, and doing his best to keep the party focused and going. At times, he even acted as the voice of reason! (Yes, even if he wasn't aware of how most human social interactions worked.)
=== Luke "Morning Light" Fenn ===
Kalera's boyfriend and the first person to completely trust her, even when he was going just a little batshit. Everything started when Luke told Kalera he trusted her, more as a Diplomacy check than anything. Then Luke began to pick up Sanity Points, which led to Kalera attempting to keep him safe and reassuring him that she trusted him (more as a Diplomacy check than anything). This led to quite possibly the most dysfunctional blooming relationship in a dungeon scenario ever, as Kalera watched over him for the next two days. When the two fell down the elevator shaft, Kalera finally embraced him, telling him she trusted him completely - leading into the most dysfunctional actual relationship ever. The two are working on their individual problems together, what with Kalera's new freedom from slavery and Luke's slowly dwindling three Sanity Points.
=== Lyle Tosscobble the 471st ===
A halfling ranger, working towards a noble goal (even if it didn't always seem that way). He was a little short-sighted in his ideas, and occasionally he would attempt to convince Kalera or the party to undertake some suicidal action; however, his intents were always good, and Kalera genuinely respected the little guy for what he ended up doing. They ended up working together in an attempt to free the rest of the party.
=== Tiemp Hiss ===
Kalera's charge during the time in the Hall of Many Things, alternating between being the worst protectee ever and a rather pleasant responsibility. Even if he had some rather horrible ideas (such as enslaving everyone in his path or attempting to spider-climb down a spiked wall of spikes and death), he was rather fun to be around. He vanished during their adventure, and even if she feels bad for letting him go, she can certainly hope that he's happy wherever he is - away from Neogi debt collectors, anyhow.
== External Links ==
Kalera, in travel form! (As depicted by Chimegumi)
A more happy Kalera (As depicted by Piketh @ DeviantArt)
Category:Player Characters