Marshtato Fairy/Transcript

The following is a transcript for the episode "Marshtato Fairy".
== ==
(The book opens up to explain about the Marshtato Fairy.)
Poppy: There is one thing I know is truth, that all us Trolls have a sweet tooth. But the tasty treat we hold most dear, the Marshtato, come but once a year. On the foggiest night, where there’s no moon, a visitor flies through the gloom. On gossamer wings, light an airy, planting her sweets… it’s the Marshtatot Fairy! But she only visits Trolls with Marshtato Day spirit, so lift up your voice so the fairy can hear it! (It is revealed that Poppy was reading it to the kids. They are also wearing fairy wings and the kids cheer.)
Keith: Queen Poppy, do you worry the fairy won’t see out Marshtato Day spirit since she lives all the way up on Hill Mountain? (The camera zooms in to show Hill Mountain. Birds can be seen flying.)
Poppy: Nope.
Keith: Yeah, neither do I.
Poppy: Good. And do you know why you shouldn’t worry? (The children are now painting rocks.)
CJ Suki: (Getting up) Because the rocks tell her. They’re the Martshtato Fairy’s friends!
Priscilla: So we paint faces on them to remind us that they’re watching.
Poppy: That’s right. Every Marshtato’s Eve, the foggiest night of the year, we make sure the rocks see us participating… in all the fun marshtato traditions, like decorating. (We go to a flashback where Satin and Chenille are decorating a pod.) Burping the alphabet!
Cooper: (burping) A.
Biggie: (burping) B.
Troll #1: (burping) C.
Smidge: (burping) D. (Guy Diamond does a glitter fart. Then we go back to the present.)
Poppy: And the fairy’s favorite activity of all… (She climbs onto a board made of red fur.) Time for the Marshtato’s Eve group hug, everyone! Everyone in formation! (A crowd of Trolls form and they cheer.) Hug in 3…
All: 3!
Poppy: 2!
All: 2!
Poppy: 1! (Branch comes by.) Huh? Branch? (Branch stops carrying a wheel barrow and a rake falls out. Then her sighs.) Uh… What are you doing? You should be joining the Marshtato’s Eve group hug.
Branch: I’m headed to the Marshtato Patch. Figured I’d stake out my picking area before everyone else does. (He sends the rake flying back into the wheel barrow with his foot.)
Poppy: Branch, come on! If the Marshtato Fairy doesn’t think you have enough spirit, she might not come!
Branch: Oh, don’t worry about that. I’m confident she won’t find out because… she doesn’t exist. (The crowd gasps. Guy Diamond and Smidge hug their painted rocks.) Oh, please! Marshtatoes are plants, people. On the foggiest night of the year, they grow out of the ground naturally. Everything else in this crazy holiday is just weird superstition. (As he walks away, Poppy gasps and grabs him by the foot with her hair.)
Poppy: Super? Yes. Stition? No.
Smidge: Yeah, more like stish-fun!
Guy Diamond: Oh! You just got served!
Smidge: OH!
Poppy: WHAT?!
Branch: Let me go!
Poppy: Too slow! (She uses her hair to form a ball around Branch.)
Branch: Fine! What if I prove the Marshtato Fairy doesn’t exist? Then will you let me enjoy my marshtatoes without all the rigmarole?
Poppy: OK, first, great word. I’m gonna use “rigmarole” more often. Second, what do I get if you can’t prove she’s not real?
Branch: Then every year, from here on out, I’ll lead the Marshtato Day hug myself. (He uses his hair to shake Poppy’s hand.)
Poppy: You’ve got one rigmarole of a deal.
Branch: That’s not how you use it.
Poppy: I stand rigmaroled. (Later, she and Branch arrive at the Marshtato Patch.)
Branch: Here we are. The Marshtato Patch. (He is carrying a lantern bug and a basket. He gives Poppy his lantern bug and takes out some binoculars.) So, sometime between now and dawn, the marshtatoes will sprout on their own, proving I’m right. (He sees Poppy leaving.) Hey, where are you going?
Poppy: I’m not gonna stake out here and wait for her to show up, Branch. We might scare her off. You know she’s very shy.
Branch: (grunts) It’s like you’re making this stuff up as you go! But fine. (He grabs Poppy with his hair and forms a tent.) The fairy can’t see us inside here. Satisfied?
Poppy: (Sitting on the end of Branch’s hair) It will suffice.
Branch: And now we wait. (He sits next to Poppy. The next morning, they have fallen asleep. They are awakened by cheering.) I’m awake! (He turns his hair back to normal.) Oh, no. (He sees the Trolls picking marshtatoes.)
Poppy: (chuckles) Oh, yes, Branch! The Marshtato Fairy strikes again!
Guy Diamond: (laughs) Thank you, Marshtato Fairy! (He picks up some marshtatoes and throws them into the air.) Thank you!
Poppy: (chuckling as she takes out a notebook) So, for next year, I’m thinking that you can lead the Marshtato Eve group hug an hour early so it can be extra long.
Branch: No. Just because we fell asleep doesn’t mean that there’s a fairy. This doesn’t prove anything.
Poppy: Ah, but it also doesn’t disprove anything.
Branch: Fine. There’s only one way to settle this. We’re going to the top of Hill Mountain so I can show you no-one lives up there. (At Hill Mountain, Poppy is holding his leaf vest to stop him.)
Poppy: No! Trolls don’t go up there. The fairy is incredibly shy, remember?
Branch: Oh, that’s very convenient. But I’m coming back with photographic proof that this holiday is a sham.
Poppy: Branch, please! (Branch ignores her.) Stop! Fine! I’m gonna make sure everyone shows extra spirit to make up for whatever damage you’re about to do! (Poppy rolls down the mountain with her hair.) Emergency hug, Trolls! Emergency hug! (She runs back to Troll Village. Branch scoffs and looks up toward the high mountain. Soon, he reaches the top.)
Branch: Well, well, well. Would you look at the complete and utter lack of fairies around. (He sees something glowing in pink.) Huh? (He crawls into an old tree trunk to see where the light is coming from.) No! (The camera reveals that he is in a place covered in marshtatoes.) It’s not possible.
Voice: Hello? Who are you? (A ball of pink light appears.)
Branch: No, it can’t be. (The light disappears, revealing the Marshtato Fairy.)
Marshtato Mary: I said, who are you?! (She pokes Branch with a marshtato on a spear.) And how many of my marshtatoes did you steal?! (Branch falls into a pile of marshtatoes.) Answer me! Oh, no, he didn’t! (She takes the marshtato from Branch.) A-ha! Answer me!
Branch: (As Marshtato Mary waves her spear) Whoa! Whoa! Are you the Marshtatot Fairy?
Marshtato Mary: (Dropping her marshtato) What?! You see any wings on me, pal?! I’m no fairy thief! I’m your worst nightmare. (She yells at Branch.)
Branch: Uh… Really? Because you’re pretty adorable.
Marshtato Mary: Adorable?! Does this look adorable to you?! (She puts out her fists.)
Branch: Uh… Kind of. (As he gets up, Marshtato Mary yells and throws her spear at him.) Uh… (The Fairy yells again and attacks him.) 
Marshtato Mary: TAKE THAT! AND THAT!
Branch: (laughs) Hey! Stop it! It tickles! OK, look, I only came up here because my friends think a fairy loves on this hill. A fairy who gives us marshtatoes.
Marshtato Mary: And you thought that was me? (groans) I’m not a Marshtato Fairy. I’m Marshtato Mary! And I certainly don’t give away marshtatoes. I take them. Every last one of the delicious, fluffy puffs of sweet perfection. All for me. Well, except for one infuriating night a year, when it’s too foggy for me to see.
Branch: (gasps) Wait, what are you saying? Marshtatoes grow year-round, but the Trolls never knew it because you’ve been taking them all?
Marshtato Mary: Eh, guess so.
Branch: Do you realize what this means? I was right! There really is no fairy.
Marshtato Mary: Eh, don’t care.
Branch: Listen, will you do me a favor? (He and Marshtato Mary look at the Trolls gathering Marshtatoes.)
Marshtato Mary: That’s where those marshtato-swiping elves live?
Branch: Uh… Trolls. Calling us elves is actually deeply offensive.
Marshtato Mary: And you want me to go down there and tell all your friends how I’m not the Marshtato Fairy?
Branch: Mm-hm.
Marshtato Mary: Hm. (cackles) Let’s do this thing.
Branch: Really? Yes! Victory dance! Trollbot style! (He starts dancing like a robot.)
Marshtato Mary: You know, I think have a lot in common, Branch.
Branch: We do?
Marshtato Mary: Oh, yeah. Neither of us can tolerate foolishness.
Branch: Huh. I guess that’s true.
Marshtato Mary: And we both love the crushing disappointments of others. (She cackles again.)
Branch: (Standing upside-down) What? No, no. (He gets back up to his feet.) I’m just trying to make a point. I’m not trying to upset anyone.
Marshtato Mary: Come on. We’re gonna wreck their holiday. Or course you’ll upset them, which is awesome! Up top! (She holds her hand out.)
Branch: I’ll upset them? (He imagines the Trolls upset and the crowd gasps.)
Priscilla and CJ Suki: What?!
CJ Suki: There’s no fairy?!
Priscilla: She isn’t real?!
Keith: (Removing his fairy wings) You’ve ruined my childhood! (We go back to reality.)
Branch: Oh. Hey, look, I think I’ve had a change of heart here.
Marshtato Mary: What?
Branch: I mean, believing in the Marshtato Fairy is fun for my friends, and I’m gonna take that away just to prove I’m right? Yeah, no. That can’t happen.
Marshtato Mary: Oh, it’s happening. (She traps Branch in a marshtato.)
Branch: What are you doing?!
Marshtato Mary: Sorry, but your friends have stolen my marshtatoes. And thanks to you… (She sprouts wings.) ... I know how to pay them back. (She cackles and flies into the air.)
Branch: Hey, you do have wings!
Marshtato Mary: I’m not a fairy! (She grunts and flies away in her light form.)
Branch: No! (He struggles to free himself.) I’ve got to stop her! (He hops off Hill Mountain and rolls at the bottom. At the patch, the Trolls are eating the marshtatoes. CJ Suki and Priscilla are sharing a marshtato.)
CJ Suki: (gasps) It’s her! The Marshtato Fairy! (The crowd gasps in amazement.)
Keith: No way!
Satin: It is! It’s really her!
Keith: It must be true! (The Trolls cheer as Marshtato Mary appears.)
Marshtato Mary: Hello, elves. (The Trolls gasp.)
Guy Diamond: Elves? Wow. That’s just uncalled for.
Marshtato Mary: I understand you’ve been looking for the Marshtato Fairy. (The Trolls cheer again.) Well, I’m here to tell you there is no fairy.
CJ Suki: What?!
Marshtato Mary: There’s just me, Marshtato Mary! And I don’t come down to “bless” You all with Marshtatoes. (She takes CJ Suki’s marshtato.) I take them in the dead of night, all for myself. Which means your entire holiday is based on a lie! (She cackles once more.)
Branch: Liar! (The Trolls gasp again. The camera reveals that Branch is on a mushroom.) Smidge? (Smidge bites the marshtato he is stuck in, freeing him.) Thanks. Mary here has told you one thing that’s true. She is not the Marshtato Fairy. (The Trolls gasp in horror.) She’s the Marshtato Fairy’s arch enemy!
Marshtato Mary: What?!
CJ Suki: I knew it!
Priscilla: Of course!
Branch: She’s been trying to trick you into not believing because she’s jealous of how much we love the fairy.
Marshtato Mary: Come on! It’s like you’re making this stuff up as you go!
Branch: Quick! There’s only one way to defeat her!
Poppy: Branch, are you saying…?
Branch: Give her just as much love as you give the fairy!
Marshtato Mary: Wait, what does that mean?
Branch: Everyone, in formation!
Marshtato Mary: (As the crowd cheers) Formation?! (The Trolls gather around.) What is this?!
Branch: HUG!!! (The Trolls form a circle and get ready to hug.
Marshtato Mary: No! You should fear me! (The Troll start hugging her and she screams.) Too much love! (The Trolls hug her until she finally goes back to Hill Mountain.)
Smidge: We saved the day!
Poppy: So, Branch, looks like you were wrong about the fairy. (Branch picks up a marshtato.) You said it yourself, she does exist.
Branch: (Splitting the marshtato) Well, marshtato, marshtah-to. (He and Poppy eat the cut marshtato.)
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