Presidenting Is Hard

Jane Valderrama-So what is exactly feel boss?
Mademoiselle Lebeau-Are we really gonna dredge up feel boss?
Kinzie-I dunno you need to ask that question to Shaundi she is the resident feel boss expert.
Pierce-I have no idea what feel boss means but I bet it has something to do with touching the president's junk.
Shaundi-Are you retarded Pierce?
Pierce angrily-Shaundi why don't you go f*** yourself.
Mademoiselle Lebeau-Pierce apologize to Shaundi.
Pierce-Fine boss I'm sorry Shaundi for snapping at you.
Shaundi-And I'm sorry for insulting retarded people by calling you a retard
Shaundi smirks at Pierce as he silently glares at her.
Jane Valderrama-Tell me what feel boss is please?
Mademoiselle Lebeau-Fine feel boss is a sex act where you twerk in the nude.
Pierce-Well there goes my lunch.
Josh Birk-Maybe me and Shaundi should try-----
Suffice to say Josh did not get to finish as a bullet whizzed by him.
Shaundi-Finish that sentence again Josh and you die.
CID-Feel boss was invented by a man named Romeo Valenzuela in 1984 when he couldn't get any from his wife he and a woman named Rosalyn Guerrero twerked in the nude and the rest is history.
Pierce-._. Well that's nice CID
Shaundi-It's times like this where I wish I self-mutilated.
Mademoselle Lebeau-Presidenting is hard when random factoids such as that keep getting thrown your way
Matt Miller-Guys don't look now but Reptile is peeking at us.
Pierce-Hello my squamous homie why are you peeking at us?
Reptile-Because I wanna see the President take her clothes off.
Shaundi-Why you couldn't get any from your girlfriend.
Mademoselle Lebeau-Why not try feel boss.
Reptile-Hell no do I look like I can't get any you sack of shit.
Shaundi-Yes?
Reptile-Shut up cunt.
Shaundi-Oh god no you did not call me a cunt.
Reptile then walked off.
Josh Birk-Shaundi that guy is a total weiner.
Reptile-I heard that.
Shaundi-Exactly he belongs at weenie hut Jrs.
Mademoiselle Lebeau-There are places like that?
Josh Birk-Yes their are.
Shaundi-Anyway we need to go to Mayor Winters office for something.
Pierce-Tanya Winters is president? But didn't the boss lady kill her a long time ago.
Shaundi-Yes but she was brought back to life by G Corporation along with Matt Maero Shogo Akuji The General William Sharp Kazuo Akuji and Shogo Akuji Jyunichi Aisha Warren Williams and all the other dudes who were killed.
Shaundi Pierce and Lebeau drove to the mayors office.
Jyunichi-Mrs.Winters the Saints are here to see you.
Tanya Winters-There must have been a significant reason you guys wanted to see me?
Pierce-We heard you know a guy who could give us some info we want?
Tanya Winters-Ahhhhh yes his name is Francois he is a french fashion designer he will give you info on why the Zin were trying to poison our water supply.
Shaundi Pierce and Lebeau drove to Francois's on the way they were reunited with Carlos
Carlos-Hey Shaundi I didn't know Mrs.Lebeau was the president
Pierce-Yeah isn't it great?
Carlos-Sure Pierce why you here anyway?
Shaundi-Francois may give us some info as to why the Zin were trying to poison our supply.
Carlos-Yo Francois get your french ass over here.
Francois-What you manwhore?
Carlos glared at Francois shutting him up.
Francois-Ahhhhhhhh yes the Zin were trying to poison your water supply to get back at you for defeating them.
Pierce gasped
Pierce-Those Zin bastards I'm gonna bust a cap in their alien asses.
Shaundi Francois Carlos and Lebeau rolled their eyes.
Category:Humor