I Have No Bones Yet I Must Flee (episode)

Mariner tries to get demoted, Rutherford tries to get promoted, Boimler makes a big move.
==Summary==
===Teaser===
In a torture room aboard a Romulan ship, two Romulan officers are cleaning up the aftermath of a Reman being tortured to death. One officer, Malok, complains that Remans leave the biggest messes, while the other officer notes how their sub-commander, Vrek, takes pleasure in their misery, and she tells Malok that she intends to assassinate Vrek. Malok tells her that he already plans to betray Vrek, and that his plans will come to fruition first, though she dismisses his claim. As the two argue, an alert sounds through the ship, and the two rush to the bridge. 
On the bridge, Vrek orders a status report. One of his officers tells him that an unknown ship has intentionally blocked their path. Vrek wonders how the ship managed to detect them through their cloaking device and accuses Malok of potential sabotage. Malok denies the accusation, and Vrek orders the unknown ship's destruction. His officers attempt to comply, but they alert Vrek that the ship's systems are not responding. Vrek desperately orders for the ship to go to cloak, but the mysterious ship fires a single beam at the Romulans, and seemingly destroys their ship.
===Act One===
In the gym, aboard the , Commander Jack Ransom and Lieutenant Shaxs are helping each other stretch, and Ransom notes how tense Shaxs is. Shaxs talks about a few problems he's been having with T'Ana, before asking how the newly-promoted lieutenants junior grade are doing. He notes that all have been doing well, except for Beckett Mariner. Little does he know that Mariner was about to enter the gym, and can overhear their conversation. She overhears that Ransom has her right where he wants her, and that soon, she won't be his problem anymore. Mariner walks away in displeasure, as Ransom invites Shaxs for hot fudge sundaes after their workout. 
In the lower decks crew bunks, newly-promoted Lieutenants Bradward Boimler and D'Vana Tendi are packing up their belongings as they get ready to move into their own rooms. Boimler gets a little emotional as he looks up at the top of his bunk to a dent where he would hit his head during a red alert. They reminisce on all the time they spent together in this corridor as ensigns as Tendi notices Mariner in an uptight mood and offers to help her pack her stuff. Mariner declines, believing that she will soon be demoted back down to ensign, telling them of what she heard in the gym. Tendi is confused as she thought Ransom was going to be supportive of her, but Mariner says that this always happens when she gets promoted. She tells them that she won't fall for his gag and promises to become an "insubordinate supernova" to get demoted on her own terms, before leaving. Boimler and Tendi then grab their stuff to go check out their new rooms, and Tendi invites Sam Rutherford to join them, before remembering that Rutherford didn't get promoted with them. Tendi notes how she's unsure how she'll feel no longer bunking with Rutherford, but Rutherford assures her that he'll get a promotion and join them. Boimler and Tendi are both unsure at how simple it will be for Rutherford, but he runs off in excitement to earn a promotion while Boimler and Tendi leave their crew bunks.
In the hangar, Mariner, still in her workout attire, approaches Ransom and an ensign named . Ransom notes her tardiness and asks her to change into her uniform, but Mariner refuses, saying she's going to keep it casual today. Ransom asks her to brief Gary on the mission, and Mariner tells Gary that they'll be visiting a menagerie to rescue a couple of Humans who were picked up accidentally, and that they are there to break them out. This makes Gary nervous, and Ransom assures them that the mission is not dangerous and informs him of the menagerie's strict no-weapons policy. Mariner says that this is a common occurrence, and that the mission will be over relatively quickly, before addressing Ransom by his first name, much to his annoyance. Gary asks if she's allowed to do that as a junior grade lieutenant, and Mariner replies that socially, they are equal. Ransom ignores her tone as they get ready to leave.
Boimler approaches his new room and enters, only to be surprised by a bright red light flooding the room from the ship's port nacelle. Boimler tries to fumble around clumsily as his vision is hindered by the brightness, though he tries to make the best of his situation.
Meanwhile, Mariner, Ransom, and Gary approach Narj's Miraculous Menagerarium in the shuttlecraft Yosemite II, and Ransom orders Mariner for her to bring them in nice and easy. Mariner deliberately accelerates, much to their shock. Before they crash though, Mariner drifts the shuttlecraft into the hangar, and she asks Ransom how he liked that. While he's at first a bit flustered, he compliments her piloting. Gary mutters that he needs to replicate new pants. They are greeted by an alien named Narj, who welcomes them warmly. Narj shows them around the menagerie, and says that the Humans are a popular attraction, and that he'll be sad to lose them. Mariner asks how they were captured, and Narj mentions that they were brought in by accident in a shipment of other bipeds. Ransom assures Narj that he brought his best team and that they will be out soon. Hearing this, Mariner believes that Ransom is being disingenuous with her and Gary, believing that he's setting her up for humiliation. Gary wonders if they are in the process of a break-up, and Mariner says that they will be breaking up as coworkers, further confusing Gary.
Mariner asks Narj how he got into the prison business, and Narj tells her that his menagerie is not a prison, as he's given his creatures a safe home. Mariner approaches the display of a small white creature, saying it doesn't deserve to be part of his hobby. Narj identifies the creature as a moopsy, and that it's his favorite. She asks if he imprisons everything he likes, and Ransom intervenes, as it is not their place to judge the menagerie, and that they're only there to collect the Humans. Mariner clarifies that she's there to be Human and call out things she disagrees with. Narj expresses confusion, as he's done his best to abide by Federation law. Ransom assures him that despite Mariner's persona, he trusts her with his life. Mariner refuses to let Ransom get in her head as she eyes the moopsy in the display.
===Act Two===
On the Cerritos, Rutherford is with Tendi, telling her how he's looking forward to getting his promotion, since it will mean they can get back to doing what they always did together like normal. Tendi voices concern that she doesn't want him to pressure himself to get a promotion just so they can hang out, but Rutherford assures her that he's been working on a project he's sure will impress Chief Engineer Andy Billups. Rutherford approaches Billups to show him a project he'd been working on over the last year to decrease vibration in the warp manifold by a factor of 0.05. However, Billups says that it can't be right, because another ensign, Livik, just decreased the vibration by a factor of 0.06, much to Rutherford's annoyance. Billups says that if Livik keeps up work like that, he'll be promoted very fast, then implements the new protocol.
Back in Boimler's room, Boimler fumbles around for a visor so that he can better see in the bright light, but as Livik's new protocol comes into action, the light only increases, further overwhelming Boimler.
Back in the menagerie, Narj shows Mariner, Ransom, and Gary to the display where the Humans are. Narj gets his keys out to let the Humans out, and Ransom voices his appreciation for freeing them, despite knowing the hit he would take. Narj assures him that while the Humans are popular, his best attraction are the Pyrithian swamp gobblers. Looking over in their direction, Narj sees the moopsy out of its cage and is immediately terrified. Mariner doesn't take him seriously, due to the cuddly appearance of the moopsy, but Narj tells her that everything in the menagerie is incredibly dangerous, as the Moopsy manages to go into a vent and enter the enclosure of the Pyrithian swamp gobblers. Narj warns them that the moopsy drinks bones, and Mariner asks how that's possible, right as the moopsy bites one of the swamp gobblers, and sucks the bones from it, terrifying everyone. They all run from the room as the moopsy escapes the enclosure and waddles slowly across the room.
Back on the Cerritos, Rutherford is working hard on a new project, and is successful in increasing the power output of the Tucker tubes by seven picocochranes. Billups congratulates him on his project, expressing hope that his adjustments can apply to the Billups tubes. Rutherford is confused by what he means, and Billups tells him that Livik figured out how to add a third tube without triggering a Heisenberg collapse, and named the third tube after him. Rutherford angrily leaves engineering, walking in front of Tendi, who is concerned for him.
Meanwhile, Boimler has moved to a different room with the help of Shaxs. His new room is close to the holodecks. Boimler thanks Shaxs for helping him move, before Shaxs excuses himself for a date he has with T'Ana in the holodeck. She meets him outside in a Robin Hood costume. As Boimler continues to set up his room, he overhears T'Ana and Shaxs' activity in the holodeck, realizing that the walls of his room are incredibly thin. At first, Boimler tries to move his bed to the other side of the room, only for him to hear Carol Freeman in the adjacent holodeck. Boimler moves the bed to the middle of the room and tries to block the noise with his pillows.
In the menagerie, Mariner, Ransom, Gary, and Narj continue to flee from the moopsy, and enter a room and lock the door moments before the moopsy gets there. As the moopsy attacks the door, Ransom angrily eyes Mariner, as he believes Mariner released the moopsy from its enclosure. Mariner denies the accusation and finds it ironic that despite Ransom trying to demote her, she's about to be demoted for something she didn't do. Ransom asks her why he'd want to demote her, and she says she heard what he told Shaxs in the gym, and Ransom clarifies that he said she wouldn't be his problem, because he wouldn't let her insubordination get to him. He also says that she's constantly trying to get demoted for acting out in manipulation of her commanding officers. Mariner denies this, but finds herself unable to explain her own actions. Coming to an understanding, Ransom tells her that no matter how hard she makes his life, she still has his support. Mariner again says that she did not release the moopsy, and Ransom believes her. 
As they reconcile, Gary asks if they can redirect their attention to the moopsy, and accuses Narj of setting it free. Narj finds the accusation ridiculous, and Ransom mentions the possibility that if they were killed, Narj would get to keep the Human exhibit, and considering that Narj is a plant-based alien, lacks bones that the moopsy feeds on. Narj debunks this, but before he can explain, the vent above them opens, and the moopsy drops on Narj, and proceeds to suck Narj's bones out. Mariner, Ransom, and Gary run out of the room and close the door behind them. Peeking in, they realize that the room the moopsy is in has no ladders, so it won't be able to go back into the vents, but their relief is short lived when they realize the moopsy is trapped in the station's main control room. The moopsy begins to walk all over the controls, forcing the station out of orbit, and hurtling towards the planet.
===Act Three===
Boimler is laying down in a Jefferies tube, having decided to set up his room there away from the commotion, but as he lays down, Rutherford comes upon him. Boimler asks if he's doing a system's check, and Rutherford replies that he's trying to diffuse heat conduction by a few nanojoules. Boimler notes that another ensign was through, looking to do the same thing, and Rutherford realizes that Livik beat him to the punch, and as he leaves, Boimler invites him out for dinner later. 
Gary panics as the menagerie plummets to the planet, and that the whole situation could have been avoided had Ransom and Mariner not been bickering. Mariner volunteers to act as bait for the moopsy to have it chase her out of the control room while Gary and Jack regain control of the station. Ransom tries to stop her, but Mariner says that even if the plan works, they'd only be able to stop re-entry by the "skin of [their] teeth." This gives Ransom an idea, and he orders Mariner to him in the face. She does so, and he takes out a tooth, saying that they will give the moopsy bones. As Mariner catches on to his plan, she continues to punch him in the face, much to the bewilderment of Gary.
On the Cerritos, Tendi finally voices her concerns that Rutherford has been overworking himself to get a promotion as he rushes to show Billups another project, but before he can show Billups his latest project, Billups says it will need to wait until after the pip ceremony. Livik has been given the promotion, and Rutherford, defeated goes back over to Tendi and apologizes for letting her down. Fed up, Tendi orders him to stand at attention. While initially confused, Tendi orders him to attention as his superior officer, and tells him that no matter what their ranks are, they will remain friends, and continue to do the activities they loved doing. Rutherford agrees, and they embrace each other. Rutherford regrets refusing his prior promotions, and Tendi looks at him in confusion. Rutherford reveals that after saving the Cerritos from the Pakleds, and the from the "space jellyfish," he was offered numerous promotions. Tendi asks why he turned them down, and Rutherford responds that he didn't want his own room away from her. Tendi asks if he can just accept a previous promotion right there, and Rutherford expresses disbelief, since Engineering is strict on that. Unconvinced, Tendi asks Billups if he can have his promotion for the time that he removed the hull, and Billups agrees, apologizing to Livik for missing out on a promotion. As Rutherford is promoted, Livik curses his name.
Back on the menagerie, the moopsy is following a trail of teeth, which eventually leads him back to his enclosure. Upon entering the enclosure, Mariner locks the moopsy in as Ransom, now without teeth, and Gary return from stabilizing the station's orbit. While they revel in their victory, they wonder how the moopsy got out at all, when Narj wasn't the one who let them go. As they move to release the Humans from their enclosure, Mariner notices that the painted image of a beach umbrella on one of the walls of the enclosure is upside-down. It falls from the wall, revealing that it's actually concealing a wall panel with access to the wiring for the door to moopsy's exhibit, which Mariner hurriedly closes before the moopsy escapes again. Realizing that the Humans were responsible for rewiring the moopsy's door, they conclude that Humans really are the most dangerous game.
:"Lieutenant junior grade's log– nope, nooo, too weird. Uh, let's go with Mariner's log. So yeah, of course it was the Humans in the menagerie that set the moopsy free. They'd seen how profitable they were as an attraction, so they wanted to kill Narj and keep the station for themselves. Humans... we really are the worst. So anyway, instead of bringing them to the Cerritos, we left them in the menagerie until somebody else has time to pick them up. Could take a while. As for Ransom, it took some doing, but Dr. T'Ana was able to fix him up with a new set of chompers."
In sickbay, T'Ana finishes work on Ransom's teeth, before excusing herself to the holodeck. Mariner apologizes for knocking all of Ransom's teeth out (given they only needed about ten), but he responds that he was only happy she followed his orders. Mariner also apologizes for doubting him, and Ransom admits that while he hasn't always been supportive, he won't let her self-sabotage herself, telling her that she is going to be a great officer. 
Boimler and Rutherford are moving stuff into their new room as the two will be roommates. They enter the room, only to find it once again flooded by the bright red lights of the nacelle. At first Boimler is terrified at the situation, but once Rutherford dims the viewports, the room's lighting becomes normal. Boimler gets comfortable in the bottom bunk of their bed, as Rutherford begins to work on a project, hoping he won't bother him with his work. A spark jumps up and catches Boimler by surprise, causing him to lurch up and hit his head, creating a new dent. Boimler smiles and says that their new room is already starting to feel like home.
==Memorable quotes==
"How did they detect us? Assassination plots against me are one thing, but sabotage? Is this your doing, Malok?"
"How dare you! Of course I crave your demise but not like–"
"Silence! I've been stabbing commanders in the back since before your mother killed her first traitor. Wipe this crumb from our path, so I can focus on being suspicious."
:- Vrek and Malok
"I don't know if I'm going to like not bunking five feet away from you. I mean, how will I sleep without someone muttering about the warp threshold?"
:- Tendi to Rutherford 
"Why is there a room between two holodecks?!"
:- Boimler
"Uh, no-weapons policy in a death-trap zoo?! *bleep* genius."
"Moopsy!"
:- Mariner and The Moopsy
"Oh, ! The moopsy is free!"
"Oh, no, your cuddliest prisoner is loose. Whatever shall we do?"
"You don't understand. Everything here is incredibly dangerous!"
"Moopsy."
"Can't be worse than the Swamp Gobblers."
"Of course it's worse! They only gobble you; the moopsy drinks your bones!"
"How does something 'drink' bones? [*the moopsy inhales one of the Swamp Gobblers*] Holy !"
"Run! Run for your lives!"
:-Narj, Mariner, and Ransom, after the former notices that the moopsy is outside its cage
"I should have been an outpost scientist."
:- Gary
"Mr. Rutherford, stand at attention!"
"What?"
"I am your superior, ensign. Do it! We'll be friends, no matter what our ranks are. We're going to spend tons of time hanging out, and talking about science, and telling jokes, and, you know, do all the things we used to do. And that's an order!"
"Yes, ma'am!"
"Oh my gosh, I just gave my first order."
:- Tendi and Rutherford
"Rutherford! And also Tendi!"
:- Livik, when he loses out on a promotion to Rutherford
"Got you, you cuddly little murderer!"
:- Mariner
"I just wish we could've figured out how this little guy got out in the first place. I mean, it clearly wasn't Narj; dude was brimming with bones."
"Let's get these Humans out of here. Starfleet Security can figure it out."
"Well, at least it wasn't our fault. You know, Humans are always blamed for being dangerous, but we don't have claws or fangs or..."
"Hey, that umbrella is upside down, yeah? (the panel falls down, resulting in the moopsy's door opening when the woman tries to hide it; Mariner hurriedly closes the door) Did you ers rewire the moopsy door?! You could've got us all killed!"
"Wow. I guess Humans really are the most dangerous game."
"Damn it."
:-Mariner, Ransom, and Gary, discovering that the displayed Humans were responsible for freeing the moopsy
==Background information==
===Title===
*The title of this episode invokes that of the Hugo Award-winning science fiction short story "", by Harlan Ellison, which was previously parodied as I Have No Voice And I Must Shout.
=== Continuity ===
* The vertical design of Vrek's starship is based on Andrew Probert's original concept for the warbird, combined with elements of the Romulan shuttle. According to Brad Winters, it was intended to be larger than a shuttle but much smaller than a warbird. 
* The Cerritos crew mentions how Humans frequently get trapped in menageries. In 2254, Captain Christopher Pike was trapped on Talos IV in , which was recounted during Spock's court martial in and . Later, in 2269, the crews of the and the were trapped in a Lactran zoo in .
* The woman in the menagerie wears the same green overalls and blue shirt as Leila Kalomi in .
* While doing their exercises, Shaxs and Ransom are wearing the same workout outfits that Beverly Crusher and Deanna Troi wore in and even did the same stretching poses. (These outfits were previously seen on unnamed crewmembers in the Season 2 episode "wej Duj".)
* For her Robin Hood holodeck session with Shaxs, T'Ana wears an outfit identical to that worn by Beverly Crusher when she and other officers were trapped in a Robin Hood fantasy realm by Q in .
* The device Rutherford is tinkering with at the end of the episode is a miniature tractor beam, which was worked on by Wesley Crusher in .
* Among the exhibits in Narj's collection are some more of the two-headed birds last seen in the aviary of Starbase 25 in the Season 2 episode . In addition, there were an Alfa 177 canine (), a Ceti eel (), a Hanonian land eel (), an Aldebaran serpent (), a florka (), a glommer (), and a sky snake ().
* Boimler refers to the nacelle as a "stupid Bussard light;" a Bussard collector is a device usually attached to the forward end of a warp nacelle which collects interstellar particles.
* The visor Boimler puts on to shade his eyes from the Bussard light is the kind also worn by Spock to shield against the insanity-producing effect of seeing a Medusan ().
* Rutherford is shown making improvements to a pair of blinking tubes, a reference to a prop that first appeared in and was used multiple times in , , and was commonly seen in many movies and TV shows outside of Star Trek. This episode establishes that they are called Tucker tubes named after Charles Tucker III.
* Ransom feeds his teeth to the Moopsy to satisfy its desire to eat bone, but teeth and bones are totally different in structure and composition. It is possible that the Moopsy consumes any calcified/mineral-rich substances.
* Among the personal effects Boimler carries with him during his efforts to find new quarters are a small model of Deep Space 9, the poster of Una Chin-Riley from , an action figure of Mirror Archer. Archer is depicted wearing the "wraparound" style command-uniform he looted from the in and the "Boimler Effect" plaque from .
==Links and references==
===Starring===
* Tawny Newsome as Beckett Mariner
* Jack Quaid as Brad Boimler
* Noël Wells as D'Vana Tendi
* Eugene Cordero as Sam Rutherford
* Dawnn Lewis as Carol Freeman
* Jerry O'Connell as Jack Ransom
* Fred Tatasciore as
** Shaxs
** Romulan male officer 1
* Gillian Vigman as
** T'Ana
** Romulan female officer
===Guest cast ===
* Carl Clemons-Hopkins as Narj
* Roan K. Lai as Moopsy
* Nolan North as
** Malok
** Livik
* Chris Perfetti as 
* Paul Scheer as Andy Billups
* Paul F. Tompkins as Vrek
;Characters with unidentified voice actors
* 
* Romulan male officer 2
===Background characters===
* Una Chin-Riley 
* The Dog 
* Reman remains
;USS Cerritos
* Alien ops ens 1
* Andorian ops ens 1
* Human ops ens 1
* Human ops ens 2
* Human ops ens 3
* Human ops ens 9
;Narj's Miraculous Menagerarium
* Alien visitor
* Antedian visitors 1 and 2
* Dulainian visitors
* Human menagerie inhabitants
* Human visitor
===References===
action figure; "ad astra per aspera"; adjustments; alert (red alert); alien; ambassador; Andorian; Antedian; (mirror); arrow; ask; assassination; atmospheric entry; attitude; attraction; away mission; away team; "Baby Bear"; bait; Bajoran; battle blade; bickering; Billups tube; bipedals; black eye; blood; body; bone; boss; bragging; brain; botanical; bunks; Bussard collector; "by the skin of our teeth"; cage; Caitian; ; captain; castle; cat; ceiling; ; cheat day; claw; cleanup duty; cloak; commander; commanding officers; computer; confidence; conspiracy; ; control room; cosmic rays; covers; crap; creature; criminals; crumb; cuteness; cybernetic implant; date; day; decapitation; Deep Space 9; demise; demoted; dent; Denty; dinner; disaster; disruptors; doctor; dog; door; drinking (aka chugging); Dulainian; dying; dynamic; eating; energy; engineer; (applied science); engineering (location); ensign; face; "falling for it"; fang; fate; fault; feet; femtoseconds; fingers; firebrand; foot; "free spirit"; friend; ; ; ; genius; "Gummy"; guy; gym; hand; hat; head; heat conduction; Heisenberg collapse; hobby; holodeck; home; "hoss"; hot fudge sundaes; hull; Human; humiliation; Illyrian; imprisonment; ingenuity; insubordination; Jefferies tube; jokes; juice; kicking; kill; Kings Canyon; ladder; languages at Narj's Miraculous Menagerarium; leaves; lieutenant; lieutenant commander; lieutenant junior grade (aka lieutenant jg); lieutenant junior grade's log; life; light; light years; "Lil' Archer"; ma'am; Maid Marian; Malok's mother; Mariner's log; menagerie (aka "menage"); Merry Men; minutes; mirror; mirror universe; misery; mission; mister; model; monster; mother; murderer; nacelle; nanojoules; Narj's Miraculous Menagerarium; Narj's species; nerds; night; Nova One; ; officer; orange; orbit; orbital lift (aka space elevator); order; Orion; ossified; "out of your [hair]"; outfit; outpost scientist; PADD; painting; Pakleds; pants; path; personnel file; ; phaser (type 2 phaser; type 3 phaser); photograph; picocochranes; piloting; pip ceremony; planet; planet near Narj's Miraculous Menagerarium; plans (scheme); plant guy; plants in Narj's menagerie displays; plate; pleasure; s (aka schemes); policy; poster; president; prison; prisoner; problem; projects; promotion; ; "pushing your buttons"; quadrant; rank; ranking; Red Wood; remains; Reman; replication; replicators; Romulan; Romulan military; Romulan uniform; room (quarters); ; sabotage; scatting; science; scratching; second; Sheriff of Nottingham; shields; "shut up"; shuttle; sickbay; sir; slab; sleep; space jellyfish (Rubidoux-encountered lifeform); Spanish language; sparks; Spock; stabbing; Starfleet; Starfleet Security; Starfleet uniform (2250s-early 2270s); Starfleet uniform (2370s-early 2380s); Starfleet uniform (early 2380s); Starfleet uniform (late 2270s-2350s); station; stealing; stretching; sub-commander; supernova; support; systems; T'Ana Program 35; ; thing; tooth (aka "chompers"); torture; traitor; tree; tube; Tucker tube; Type 6A shuttlecraft (unnamed); umbrella; veneers; vents; vibration; victory; viewport; visor; VISOR; Vrek's starship; Vulcan; wall panel; walls; warp manifold; warp threshold; weapon; week; "working yourself to death"; wunderkind; yawn; year; zoo
====Menagerie creature references====
Aldebaran serpent; Alfa 177 canine; bat; bird with head plumage; bird-like lizard; black bird; butterfly; Ceti eel; desert-dwelling arthropod; eel-like creature; florka; flying turtle-like creature; frog; glommer; gravity well planet crab; gravity well planet predator; gray snake; Hanonian land eel; hexapod creature; horned koala; horned snake; large-beaked bird; moopsy; murder-bug; Pyrithian swamp gobbler; sky snake; ten-eyed reptile; two-headed bird; wasp; winged goat-like creature
====Meta references====
bleep
===External links===
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de:Keine Knochen, aber muss trotzdem fliehen