B90210-18

==Battletech 90210 - Chapter 18 -==
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===Episode 18===
((Scene opens to Davion castle))
Melissa: Victor, I know you miss your father.....Can't you find a more positive way of dealing with it?
Vic: But I thought the 10th Lyran Guards would like running over a Clan world.....
Yvonne: Well let's be fair, we lost our father...But poor Sun Tzu lost his mother and father the same day... What about him...
((cut scene back to the Celestial Throne Room, Sian))
Sun Tzu: Well, mom is dead...Dad is dead. I guess the Celestial Throne is mine....(sigh) Whatever shall I do?
(Sun Tzu beams with inner delight and sits on the Celestian Throne)
((song to AMERICAN PIE))
Sun Tzu: 
A long long time ago.....
Grandpa Max had a plan
To get the old fox off his back.
He went and made a clone of Hanse
To put the FedSuns in a trance
And maybe, cut Sian a little slack.
But '28 made him shiver
When the adept did deliver
Odd news there's a wedding?
Guess who the fox is bedding?!
So off to Terra we did go, and after dinner, what a show
All caught in the undertow,
So now Hanse must die.
(CHORUS)
WHY WHY WON'T HANSE DAVION DIE?!
LET'S ALL HOPE HE SOME KIDS TO TURN HIS NATION AWRY
WE'LL SIT BACK AND LAUGH WHEN THAT DAY COMES 'NIGH.
OH, THAT DAY WE WATCH HANSE DAVION DIE!
THAT DAY WE WATCH HANSE DAVION DIE!
We made the switch had em 'gainst the wall
Until Sortek came and screwed it all
He took Hanse and he got away.
Now the clone tried to be the king.
But he couldn't figure out the wiring
Till ol' Hanse got the Mech to go his way.
Now Hanse was more than a little sore.
and he started a Succession War!
Plowed thru us like we're chaff,
and he tore the nation in half.
Our nation was cut, clean in 'twain,
and Grandpa Max he went insane...
and Romano took over the reins 
To save the Capellan state.
She started screaming...
(CHORUS)
Now Romano's, she's in charge!
Purging people, living large.
Unfortunately, she's gone insane.
Now she's gone and got the Mask
To wipe the smirk off Candace's (naughty)
and to bring the St. Ives worlds back home.
The assassin missed, Candace saw red!
Now Mom's got a new hole in her head
Candace taught me not to dally
But she didn't kill Kali......ugh.
Now I'm wondering what will come next
Now that Kai and Hanse are really vexed
Perhaps I should write them all a check
To say Oops, I'm real sorry.......NOT!
Now I'm singing...
(CHORUS)
Xin Sheng, oh that's my plan!
While Victor's dealing with the Clans.
I think that plan works for me.
Tommy's son well he's done in
and little Victor chose to sin,
and Kathy's gotta plan of her own.
So Victor makes a huge mistake,
and Capellan worlds I'll retake,
The Lyrans chose to split.
Vic takes another hit!
My nation just grows in size, 
First Lord is the end game prize!
Now all Capellans feel some pride
because the Fox has died. 
We're screaming Xin Sheng!
(CHORUS)
*court minstrel plays a slow series of notes near the end of the song*
So now I'm on the Celestial Throne
Cleaning up the mess that I call home.
To get the state back out of whack
Now I'm plotting all new schemes
To realize those special dreams
and maybe give the fox a heart attack
Pit Vic and Kathy against each other
Marry Isis (shrugs, pause) or another
Leave chaos in my wake
And suck up to Word of Blake.
And now I sit here merrily
To plan the end of dear (puts dear in finger quotes) Kali.
Thank goodness I don't have to try. 
To make....the Old Fox....die!
(CHORUS)
(Maskirovka guards and Warrior House warriors chime in)
MY MY, HANSE DAVION DIED,
THE CIVIL WAR IS COMING, AND OUR TIME HAS ARRIVED
LET'S SIT BACK AND LAUGH BECAUSE IT'S XIN SHENG TIME.
AND THANK THE GODS THAT OLD HANSE DAVION DIED!
Sun Tzu: Well, at least mom and dad are gone. I'm in charge...Poor Victor, whatever shall he do? *chuckles*
((Cut back to Davion palace))
Victor: Poor Sunny, whatever shall we do?
Kathy: Could we send Sun-Tzu flowers?
Melissa: I don't know. Perhaps, something a little less aggressive.
Victor: I hate saying this, but maybe Kathy's right on this one. Flowers might say hi!
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