Lions

Lions are the sworn enemies of Impalas worldwide. It is a well known fact that impalas do not enjoy rugby of any kind but if they must tolerate it, they go South African every time. Thishas unsurprisingly annoyed the British and Northern Irish lions squad, recently the debate became quite heated when Ronan O'Gara kicked a defenseless impala in the crotch and ran away snickering. The impala community where outraged but have not yet reacted formally.
Oddly this animosity towards the impalas doesn't seem to translate to allies of the impala. The most notable example of this was when the lions joined the Catholic Church (an open supporter of impalas) against the British (the Church had traditionally had a problem with the English after Henry VIII kicked off that whole Protestant buisness in England), but only after the Victorian nobility took to beheading and mounting lions above their fireplaces.
Lions hate Hotties from History, beleiving it to be an offensive and irrevent view of the past and have written letters to the Daily Mail regesturing their disgust. Unfortunatly, for the lions at least, the postal worker delivering the letters was kidnapped by a group of intrepid buglers. He was then force fed buffalo mozzarella until he promised to never send letters from the lion's adress (135 Cave Street, Africa). The buffalo were so angered by this they decided to become official allies of the impalas and since then buffalo-lion violence has gone up 62%.
They enthusiastically support the aims of the BNP, although this is mostly due to their policy of deporting anyone who thinks that Nick Griffin looks like a rat to Lionland. Recently, having been attacked by anti-fascist campaigners, the lions' spokeslion adjusted his napkin and licked his lips as he told the BBC, "I fully support democracy". He then ate the political correspondant.
Fuck you Chris
Category:Animals