The Spoiler

==In Gumball and Darwin's Room==
::
:: Dude, what are you doing?
:: Well, I need money and the tooth fairy will provide.
:: What about your allowance?
:: I spent it on this bow and arrow.
::
:: You do realize those are your adult teeth, right?
::
:: What do you need the money for, anyway?
:: For the movies. Which of my organs do you think is the least useful? How much do you think a nipple would go for?
:: What movie would be worth losing your ability to make cheese?!
:: First, I think you still have a lot to learn about us mammals. And secondly, we're talking about The Screamening! It's the only movie in ten years that's not a remake, a sequel, a remake of a sequel, or a prequel of a sequel of a remake!
:: Really?! Time to dig into the money my biological parents left me!
:: How can you inherit money from a couple of goldfish?
::
:: Oooh!
::
:: Maybe you should save these and invest them in the future. It's what they would have wanted.
:: Then, where are we gonna get the money?
::
:: I have money.
:: Oh. Awkward. I–I guess this was bound to happen one day. Actually, you don't have any money. Your piggy bank is filled with nails.
:: Toenails.
::
:: EUUGH!!
:: And we replaced the money you stashed under the mattress with IOU's because we can't afford to pay you back.
:: And I'm sorry about your college fund.
:: But, you didn't know about–-
: and : The safe?
:: Well, at least you don't know about the thirty dollars mom just gave me. What–what?!
::
:: This is perfect! I'll pay you back!
:: You don't have to pay me back.
:: I don't?
::
:: On one condition: you take me with you.
:: No way. You're way too young. You'd freak the wig out.
:: Oh, you don't think I can take it?
:: Oh, I know you can't take it.
:: You better believe I can take it.
:: Why are you guys talking in scary voices?
:: 'Cause, it's a scary movie, dude.
:: A scary movie?!
:: If you don't take me, you don't get the money.
:: Fine. I'll just wait 'til the end of the week when I get my allowance.
:: Ha! Good luck avoiding the spoilers until then.
:: Well, good luck trying to think of a comeback to this.
::
==In the School Bus==
:: So... when you said it was a scary movie, did you mean scary like thinking you left your lunchbox at home and then, realizing you have it, or really scary, like when you're blowing up a balloon and you're worried it might pop?
:: Yeah, I think it's more like being chained to a bear in a free-falling airplane without parachutes that's filled with vampire bats… on fire.
::
:​​​: Have you guys seen The Screamening? Ah, it's great! Especially when the dentist–-
::
:: Hey! No spoilers!  Ugh, I need to forget that. Clear me.
::
:: Didn't work, but thanks anyway.
==Avoiding More Spoilers==
::
:: Okay. I just need to get through the week and get my allowance without learning anything about The Screamening. Right?
:: Right!
::
:: Hey guys! Has anyone seen The Screamening?
::
:: Dude!
:: I'm sorry. I just need to prepare myself mentally. It's the suspense I can't handle.
:: Can't handle suspense, huh? Then, you're really not gonna like it when I–-
::
:: What?!
:: To be continued. 
:: Noooooooo!
:​​​​: Pssst! This is in the movie.
::
:: Is it about vampires?
:​​​​​​​​​​​: No, dude. It's about a dentist.
::
:: Never mind. Sorry.
::
:: Does someone, uh…
:: Oh, yeah. The dentist's wife is a hairdresser.
::
:: Pssst!
::
:: The dentist and the hairdresser inherit a remote cabin in the woods from their crazy uncle, but they found out it's on an ancient cowboy burial ground, and their car breaks down–-
:: Alright! That's it!
::
:: No more spoilers!
:: Actually, there was a dinner scene which very closely resembles the one–-
::
==Back at Home==
::
:: Let's see what people are up to on Elmore Plus. Ah, Carrie.
::
:: "If I was a certain mom-to-be, I wouldn't follow my husband down the cellar steps." #ghostsinthebasement  #winkwink  #spoileralert"? AAH! What kind of lard-brained punk writes spoiler alert AFTER giving out the spoiler?! #YOU!
::
:: "Wow! Chill out, Gumball. You're going crazier than the wife when she sees what's down the–-" Aah!
::
:: That's it! Darn you all! I curse your crappy ancestors and your descendants!
::
:: What the what, dude?!
:: Well, I was just finishing your quote from The Screamening. It's scratched into the cellar door, right?
::
:: Thank you!
:: Don't mention it. So... I was just in the kitchen. I slipped and kinda accidentally baked this cake with chocolate writing on it that says "Gumball is Awesome." Do you want a slice?
:: Hmm. This is highly suspicious. But, on the other hand, C-a-a-a-ake!
::
:: Oh, yeah. And it's all yours! How does it taste?
:: Decibelicious.
:: Ah, you're so funny. Hey, wanna watch some TV?
::
:: So, will you take me to the movie this weekend?
::
:: No.
:: What?! What about the subliminal message?!
:: Sorry, I don't understand Japanese.
:: Oh, come on!
:: Look. I don't want my little sister to be traumatized, 'kay?
:: This is girl-ist!
:: What? No! It's because you're four!
:: Well, then, it's age-ist!
:: No! It's sister-who'll-be-so-freaked-out-by-seeing-the-movie-that-she'll-be-a-pain-in-the-butt-for-a-month-ist!
::
:: Gumball, I've already witnessed all the horror this world can muster.
:: What did you see?
:: I've seen a beast gorging on a thousand lambs in the darkness of his lair.
:: Dude, we've all seen Dad eating a kebab in bed before.
:: I've been to the swimming pool with Granny Jojo.
::
:: See? I can take it. Try me.
:: Okay, okay. I'm going to try and scare you, okay? Be prepared, 'cause you just don't know when it's–-
::
:: Aaaaaah!
::
:: Knew it.
==Phone Conversation==
::
:: No, honestly. We need an extension to the police motto. It should say "To protect and to serve and to tase people who ruin movies for others."
:: Don't worry. I won't reveal anything. I mean, who'd even want to know that the dentist–-
:: No no no no no, please! Don't!
:: I'm just messing with you.
:: Yeah, thanks.
:: The dentist is actually–-
:: The one who unleashed the evil spirits! Haha!
:: Dad! Are you eavesdropping on us?!
:: Uh, oh. Uh. Toooooo–
:: That was a real spoiler too, wasn't it?
:: Yes, it was. Sorry– oooooo…
:: Do you have any other spoilers, please?
:: Is anyone else eavesdropping!?
:, , , , and : Yup.
:: It's still worth seeing the film, though.
:: Really?
:: At least for the special effects when the demons are released from the cellar!
:: Wait, she was allowed to see it?!
:: Alright. Bye, everyone!
==In the Backyard==
::
:: Dude, what are you doing now?
:: Digging a hole to put my head in.
:: With your head, it would be easier to put it in an empty swimming pool.
:: And now, it's competition time! This week's big question is all about– You guessed it! The Screamening! And, our big question is– why is it called The Screamening? Looks like our first caller.
: : Uh, hi. My name's Rocky Robinson.
::
: : It's called The Screamening because–-
::
:: Rocky, are you there? Oh, never mind. We have another caller on line two!
::
: : Yes. The Screamening is a portmanteau of the words "scream" and "awakening," which is the sound the dentist makes when his wife gives birth to a demon baby.
::
: : Yes, just like that.
::
:: By the way, why didn't you just turn off the radio?
::
==Movie Time==
::
:: Finally! It's Saturday. Check!
::
:: Got my allowance? Check!
::
:: Affordable candy 'cause the stuff at the movies is a total rip-off? Check!
::
:: Blankets, because they always go nuts with the air-conditioning? Check!
::
:: Clippers in case someone with big hair sits in front of us? Check!
::
:: A red carpet to make us feel special? Check!
::
:: I'm ready to see the film and I'm spoiler-proof for the journey! Here we go!
::
::
:: I knew that was going to happen.
::
: : Honey, come home from the surgery, quick. I got a call from your mysterious uncle. He's leaving us his cabin!
: : But, honey! We don't need a house. I'm just a simple dentist.
::
:: How do you know every single line of a film?
:: Well, I knew I would be terrified when I saw it. So, yesterday, I decided to watch it... before I watch it.
:: Whatever. 
::
: : Relax, honey! We'll be there soon.
:: What the what?
:: Would you please be quiet? I'm trying to have a phone conversation here! Yeah, yeah. There's some kid. Carry on.
::
:: Anais, what are you doing?
:: What does it look like I'm doing?
:: Pirating a movie!
:: No, I'm not! I bought a ticket online, so I paid to be here. I'm just taking the movie home to watch by myself, like a doggy bag.
::
:: Actually, I can't see anything wrong with that.
:: I still get the feeling she shouldn't be doing it, but why?
::
:, , and : Hmm.
: : It's in the bush. It's coming!
: : 
::
:: Hey! Movie piracy is a federal offense!
::
:: Aw, crap. It's fossilized soda.
:: Oh no! Does this mean we're stuck to the floor because the dried cola is so sticky it's like superglue, and then our clothes will get stuck to it and we'll have to run naked through the theater, leading to all sorts of shenanigans?
:: Not really. It's more of a minor inconvenience.
:: Just keep going. He's right behind us!
: : It's right behind us! Faster!
::
:: Haha! We're lucky that Larry's IQ is as small as his paycheck!
::
:: Why doesn't the whole room ever go silent when I come up with a good bur–
::
:: It's a dead end. What'll we do?
:: We use the folding seats like a diving board to propel ourselves up to the fire exit. Like this.
::
: and : Gumball!
:: You guys go... and leave me behind.
:: Nooo!
:: And go give yourselves up.
: and : What?!
:: Well, at least one of us can make it.
:: And why should it be you?!
:: Listen, Gumball. I have an idea, but you're not gonna like it.
::
: : It's the baby! It's coming!
:: Just do it. Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it!
::
:: The demon baby was just a figment of his imagination because the dentist has seven split personalities and every character in the movie was him!
::
: : Honey, look. Say hello to your beautiful new baby.
::
==The Ending==
::
:: I'm sorry, man. Here.  You can hit me if you like.
:: Dude. You saved me from a HUGE disappointment. That movie had the worst ending in the galaxy. Also, I got my money back, so all's well that ends well. Right, sis?
::
Category:The Amazing World of Gumball Transcripts