Walter Westinghouse

"Walter Westinghouse" is a "kind of mini-opera" by The Residents, recorded in November 1976 for the unrealized "three-sided" album Tourniquet of Roses, which was ultimately issued abridged as the 1977 album Fingerprince (minus this and other tracks).
It was first heard in an edited version included on the 1977 promotional cassette The Residents Radio Special. The complete mini-opera was included on the Babyfingers EP in 1979; it (along with the other Babyfingers tracks) has often been appended to Fingerprince on CD reissues.
It was performed live as part of The Residents' 13th Anniversary tour from 1985 to 1987, and again during their 1998 Fillmore performances; it was most recently performed at the group's Faceless Forever preview at the Mill Valley Film Festival in 2022.
== History ==
"Walter Westinghouse" was recorded in November 1976, late in the sessions for The Residents' planned "three-sided" album Tourniquet of Roses. This album would have featured two sequences of tracks on two separate grooves on one side of the vinyl disc; a feat previously achieved by British comedy troupe Monty Python on their 1973 album Matching Tie and Handkerchief.
"Walter Westinghouse" is a "kind of mini-opera" with characters (the titular Walter and his wife Wanda) and dialogue; characteristics which would become more prominent in The Residents' work in the 1980s.Fingerprince Classic Series CD reissue liner notes, 1987 Along with the mostly instrumental ballet "Six Things To A Cycle", it is one of two lengthy conceptual pieces The Residents intended to include on Tourniquet of Roses.
The three-sided album concept was dropped when it was found to be impractical and overly expensive; the abridged Tourniquet of Roses was released in February 1977, retitled Fingerprince. "Walter Westinghouse" was one of a number of tracks intended for the temporarily shelved "third" side of the album, which was now earmarked for release in the near future as an EP titled Babyfingers.
== Release ==
"Walter Westinghouse" was first released in August 1977, as the concluding track featured in The Residents Radio Special. This promotional cassette was issued to radio stations to promote The Residents' recent singles and upcoming projects; as such it features cuts from Babyfingers. 
The version of "Walter Westinghouse" featured in The Residents Radio Special is a unique five minute edit which removes the second and third verses; this edit has not been released outside the special (while the other songs featured in the special were remastered and included separately on the 2002 CD edition, Eat Exuding Oinks! Ralph Records' 1977 Radio Special, "Walter Westinghouse" was not).
Babyfingers was ultimately released in limited numbers to fans who had been waiting for the delayed Third Reich 'n Roll Collectors' Box; "Walter Westinghouse" was sequenced as the final song on the EP, taking up the entirety of side two in a manner mirroring the similar sequencing of the 18 minute suite "Six Things To A Cycle" on Fingerprince. A somewhat larger (but still limited) pressing was issued to members of the W.E.I.R.D. fan club in 1981. 
The complete "Walter Westinghouse" was released to the wider public in 1983 on the outtakes compilation Residue of The Residents, but it was excised from the 1998 CD edition Residue Deux. It was restored to the track listing of the compilation for its 2014 vinyl reissue.
It was included as part of the restored Tourniquet of Roses track sequence on the 1987 and 1995 CD reissues of Fingerprince, and (alongside the rest of Fingerprince and Babyfingers), it was remastered by engineer Scott Colburn for inclusion on the pREServed expanded two disc edition of Fingerprince in 2018.
== Live versions ==
"Walter Westinghouse" was rehearsed by The Residents for inclusion in their planned (but never realized) 10th Anniversary tour in 1982; a live-in-the-studio recording from these rehearsals was included on the 2019 pREServed edition of Fingerprince.
The Residents first performed "Walter Westinghouse" live on stage as part of the group's 13th Anniversary Show from 1985 to 1987. This arrangement of the suite features long-time collaborator Snakefinger, who accompanied the group on the tour.
Its next performance was during The Residents' October residency at The Fillmore in San Francisco in 1998; for this series of shows Molly Harvey performed the role of Walter's wife Wanda. The Fillmore arrangement is an abridged take on the song, with shorter instrumental breaks between verses.
The song's most recent live performance occurred during The Residents' preview of their 50th Anniversary tour Faceless Forever at the Mill Valley Film Festival on October 13th 2022, however it was not performed on the tour that followed in January and February 2023.
== Lyrics ==
=== Full-length version ===
 Walter Westinghouse went to town
 He found a friend today
 His friend was peeling ceiling wax as
 He heard Walter say:
 "Love me tender, love me sweet
 Love me like I love my feet
 Sit me down with Ezra Pound
 But don't forget to eat.
 Or cause a country boy to cook
 A carrot or a cake
 But don't forget the feelings
 Of a friend are hard to fake."
 He lives a life of April leaves
 Respondent to the thought that
 "Often things you caught or bought
 Were not the ones you sought."
 Now his December is a sender
 Singing songs he knows
 But all the words are:
 "Cheese" and
 "Please" and
 "Boy, I hope it snows."
 He buys the bacon, and the achin'
 In his heart is due
 To overcoats and Quaker Oats
 And if his wife should sue.
 "Wanda, Wanda, where'd you went and
 Tell me what'd you take?"
 "I took the tongue of Philipp Jung
 And left it in the lake."
 "But, my dear, I think I fear
 That you had lost your way."
 "Cause scrambled eggs,
 Cause scrambled eggs,
 Were all he'd let me bake."
 He said "your trust is like a crust
 Too brittle and too thin."
 I said "you're full of n*gger nuts
 And look like Rin Tin Tin."
 Is common ground not ever found
 But flees from dad to son?
 Or is it just believing that the
 Evening steals the sun.
 I said "your snoot is full of poot
 And should be in a shoe"
 And then I said "your stupid bed
 Is better off than... you..."
 "Oh, come home, dear!"
 "Eat Exuding Oinks Upon
 And Bleed Decrepit Broken Bones
 At Caustic Spells of Hell."
 "Huh, what's that, dear? Huh?
 "Eat Exuding Oinks Upon
 And Bleed Decrepit Broken Bones
 At Caustic Spells of Hell!"
 "Eat Exuding Oinks Upon?
 And Bleed Decrepit Broken Bones?
 At Caustic Spells of Hell?"
 "Yes, Eat Exuding Oinks Upon
 And Bleed Decrepit Broken Bones
 At Caustic Spells of Hell!"
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 He sees the threads of worn out treads
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true...Ima Buddy, Ima Buddy's Totally Impartial Companion to Uncle Willie's Highly Opinionated BIG MAMAS, 1992
=== Radio Special edit (1977) ===
 Walter Westinghouse went to town
 He found a friend today
 His friend was peeling ceiling wax as
 He heard Walter say:
 "Love me tender, love me sweet
 Love me like I love my feet
 Sit me down with Ezra Pound
 But don't forget to eat.
 Or cause a country boy to cook
 A carrot or a cake
 But don't forget the feelings
 Of a friend are hard to fake."
 He buys the bacon, and the achin'
 In his heart is due
 To overcoats and Quaker Oats
 And if his wife should sue.
 "Wanda Wanda where'd you went and
 Tell me what'd you take?"
 "I took the tongue of Philipp Jung
 And left it in the lake."
 "But, my dear, I think I fear
 That you had lost your way."
 "Cause scrambled eggs,
 Cause scrambled eggs,
 Were all he'd let me bake."
 He said "your trust is like a crust
 Too brittle and too thin."
 I said "you're full of n*gger nuts
 And look like Rin Tin Tin."
 Is common ground not ever found
 But flees from dad to son?
 Or is it just believing that the
 Evening steals the sun.
 I said "your snoot is full of poot
 And should be in a shoe"
 And then I said "your stupid bed
 Is better off than... you..."
 "Oh, come home, dear!"
 "Eat Exuding Oinks Upon
 And Bleed Decrepit Broken Bones
 At Caustic Spells of Hell."
 "Huh, what's that, dear? Huh?
 "Eat Exuding Oinks Upon
 And Bleed Decrepit Broken Bones
 At Caustic Spells of Hell!"
 "Eat Exuding Oinks Upon?
 And Bleed Decrepit Broken Bones?
 At Caustic Spells of Hell?"
 "Yes, Eat Exuding Oinks Upon
 And Bleed Decrepit Broken Bones
 At Caustic Spells of Hell!"
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 EatexudingoinksuponandbleeddecrepitbrokenbonesatcausticspellsofHELL!
 He sees the threads of worn out treads
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true
 And calls his color true...
== List of releases ==
* The Residents Radio Special (1977) Grove Street studio recording, November 1976 (1977 radio edit, 4:54)
* Babyfingers EP (1979) Grove Street studio recording, November 1976 (8:07)
* Residue of The Residents (1983) 
* Live In The USA! 13th Anniversary Tour (1986) The 13th Anniversary Show live recording, The First Avenue Club, Minneapolis, Minnesota, February 10th 1986 (9:01)
* Fingerprince / Babyfingers Classic Series CD reissue (1987) 
* 13th Anniversary Show - Live In Holland (1987) The 13th Anniversary Show live recording, Paradiso, Amsterdam, Netherlands, October 25th 1986 (8:25)
* In Memoriam Torso (1994) 
*Fingerprince (Tourniquet of Roses) CD reissue (1995) 
* 13th Anniversary Show - Live In Tokyo (1999) The Eyeball Show live recording, Parco Space, Tokyo, Japan, October 30th 1985 (8:29)
* dot.com (2000) Live at the Fillmore '98 live recording, The Fillmore, San Francisco, California, October 1998 (6:24)
*Eat Exuding Oinks! Ralph Records' 1977 Radio Special (2002) 
* Kettles Of Fish On The Outskirts Of Town (2003) Live at the Fillmore '98 live recording, The Fillmore, San Francisco, California, October 1998 (6:30)
* 13th Anniversary Show - Ritz NY - Jan 16, 1986 (2010) The 13th Anniversary Show live recording, The Ritz, New York City, January 16th 1986 (8:15)
* Fingerprince pREServed edition (2017) The 10th Anniversary Show rehearsal recording, Grove Street studio, 1982 (6:45)
* Wormwood Box (2022) Live at the Fillmore '98 live recording, The Fillmore, San Francisco, California, October 31st 1998 (7:00)
=== List of versions ===
== See also ==
* Babyfingers
* Fingerprince
* "Six Things To A Cycle"
* The Residents Radio Special
== Buy Or Die! ==
=== Listen online ===
* "Walter Westinghouse" (1995 Tourniquet of Roses remaster) on Spotify
* "Walter Westinghouse" (2018 pREServed remaster) on Spotify
*"Walter Westinghouse" (1982 live-in-the-studio rehearsal) on Spotify
*"Walter Westinghouse" (1986 Live In The USA! version) on Spotify
*"Walter Westinghouse" (1998 Fillmore version) on Spotify
== External links and references ==
*Babyfingers at The Residents Historical
*Babyfingers at Discogs
*Fingerprince at Discogs
*"Walter Westinghouse" at Genius
Category:Fingerprince‏‎
Category:Babyfingers
Category:Non-album tracks
Category:The 13th Anniversary Show‏‎
Category:Faceless Forever
Category:Wormwood Live
Category:Songs