A Canterlot Wedding Part 1/Transcript

: Rarity: Ahh!
: [running footsteps]
: Rarity: It is gorgeous out. Just gorgeous!
: [running footsteps]
: Applejack: [slurp]
: [running footsteps]
: Spike: Twi... light! ...I... have... Lemme just... [deep breath] [belch]
: Twilight Sparkle: Dear Twilight, I am sure you are as excited as I am about the upcoming wedding in Canterlot. [to the others] Wedding? [reading] I will be presiding over the ceremony, but would very much like you and your friends to help with the preparations for this wonderful occasion. Fluttershy, I would like you and your songbird choir to provide the music.
: Fluttershy: Oh my goodness! What an honor!
: Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie Pie, I can think of no one more qualified than you to host the reception.
: Pinkie Pie: Hip, hip, hooray!
: Twilight Sparkle: Applejack, you will be in charge of the catering for the reception.
: Applejack: Well, color me pleased as punch!
: Twilight Sparkle: Rainbow Dash–
: Rainbow Dash: [yawn]
: Twilight Sparkle: ...I would very much appreciate it if you could perform a sonic rainboom as the bride and groom complete their "I do"'s.
: Rainbow Dash: Yes!
: Twilight Sparkle: Rarity, you will be responsible for designing the dresses for the bride and her bridesmaids.
: Rarity: Princess Celestia wants me to– [unintelligible] ...wedding dress? For a Canterlot wedding... I, ah, ooh, oooh!
: [thump]
: Twilight Sparkle: And as for you, Twilight, you will be playing the most important role of all: Making sure that everything goes as planned. See you all very soon. Yours, Princess Celestia. But... I don't understand. Who's getting married?
: Spike: Oh, wait! Uh, I was probably supposed to give you this one first.
: Twilight Sparkle: Princess Celestia cordially invites you to the wedding of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and... [gasp] My brother?!
: [theme song]
: Applejack: Your brother's getting married? Congratulations, Twilight! That's great news!
: Twilight Sparkle: Yeah, great news. That I just got from a wedding invitation! Not from my brother, but from a piece of paper! Thanks a lot, Shining Armor. I mean, really, he couldn't tell me personally? [as Shining Armor] Hey, Twilight, just thought you should know I'm making a really big decision that changes everything. Oh, never mind, you'll hear about it when you get the invitation. [normal] Princess Mi Amore Cadenza? Who in the hoof is that?! [snort]
: Fluttershy: Um, Twilight? Are you okay?
: Twilight Sparkle: Sorry, it's just that Shining Armor and I have always been so close. He's my B.B.B.F.F! [beat] Big Brother Best Friend Forever?
: Rest of main cast: Ohhh!
: Twilight Sparkle: Before I came here and learned the importance of friendship, Shining Armor was the only pony I ever really accepted as a friend.
:: When I was just a filly, I found it rather silly
:: To see how many other ponies I could meet
:: I had my books to read, didn't know that I would ever need
:: Other ponies to make my life complete
:: But there was one colt that I cared for
:: I knew he would be there for me
:: My big brother, best friend forever!
:: Like two peas in a pod, we did everything together
:: He taught me how to fly a kite (Best friend forever!)
:: We never had a single fight (We did everything together!)
:: We shared our hopes, we shared our dreams
:: I miss him more than I realized
:: It seems...
: [Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity]
:: Your big brother, best friend forever
:: Like two peas in a pod, you did everything together
: [Twilight Sparkle]
:: And though he's, oh, so far away
:: I hoped that he would stay
:: My big brother best friend
:: Forever...
:: Forever...
: Applejack: As one of your P.F.F.'s... [beat] Pony Friends Forever...
: Rest of main cast: Ohhh!
: Applejack: ...I wanna tell you that I think your brother sounds like a real good guy.
: Twilight Sparkle: He is pretty special. I mean, they don't let just anypony be captain of the Royal Guard.
: Rarity: [chirp] So let me get this straight. We're helping out with the wedding of not only a princess, but a captain of the Royal Guard?
: Twilight Sparkle: I guess we are.
: Rarity: Ooh, ooh, oooh!
: [thump]
: Rest of main cast: [excited chattering]
: Rainbow Dash: A sonic rainboom? At a wedding?! Can you say "best wedding ever"?!
: Pinkie Pie: [gasp] [echoing] Best wedding ever!
: Spike: So you all get to help with the big fancy wedding, but I'm the one who gets to host the bachelor party! I have just one question. What's a bachelor party?
: Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and Fluttershy: [laughter]
: Applejack: Why the long face, sugarcube?
: Twilight Sparkle: I'm just thinking about Shining Armor. Ever since I moved to Ponyville, we've been seeing each other less and less. And now that he's starting a new family with this "Princess Mi Amore Ca-whatshername", we'll probably never see each other.
: Applejack: Come on, now. You're his sister. He'll always make time for you.
: Twilight Sparkle: Couldn't seem to make time to tell me he was getting married.
: Pinkie Pie: We're here, we're here!
: Rainbow Dash: Whoa, what's with all the guards?
: Rarity: I'm sure they're just taking the necessary precautions. Royal weddings do bring out the strangest ponies.
: Pinkie Pie: Aaaaaaaaa– [sneezes like a trumpet]
: Rarity: Now, let's get going! We've got work to do!
: Applejack: And you've got a big brother to go congratulate.
: Twilight Sparkle: Yeah. Congratulate. And then give him a piece of my mind.
: Twilight Sparkle: I've got something to say to you, mister.
: Shining Armor: Twily! Ah, I've missed, you, kid. How was the train ride? I–
: Twilight Sparkle: How dare you not tell me in person that you were getting married! I'm your sister, for pony's sake!
: Shining Armor: It's not my fault! Princess Celestia has requested a major increase in security. Didn't you see all the guards at the train station?
: Twilight Sparkle: Yeah, there's a big wedding coming up. Maybe you heard about it?
: Shining Armor: It has nothing to do with the wedding. A threat has been made against Canterlot. We don't know who's responsible for it, but Princess Celestia asked that I help provide additional protection. This, you need to see.
: [pop]
: Shining Armor: [gasps] The burden of keeping Canterlot safe and secure rests squarely on my shoulders. Staying focused on the task at hand has been my top priority.
: Twilight Sparkle: Okay, okay, I get it. You've got a really important job protecting all of Canterlot with a force field only you can conjure up. But still... how could you not tell me about something as big as your wedding? Am I not that important to you any more?
: Shining Armor: Hey. You're my little sister. Of course you're important to me. But I'd understand if you didn't want to be my best mare now.
: Twilight Sparkle: You want me to be your best mare?
: Shining Armor: Well... yeah.
: Twilight Sparkle: I'd be honored! But I'm still pretty ticked you're marrying somepony I don't even know! When did you even meet this "Princess Mi Amore Cadenza"?
: Shining Armor: Twily, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza is Cadance, your old foalsitter.
: Twilight Sparkle: Cadance? As in the Cadance? As in the greatest foalsitter in all the history of foalsitters?!
: Shining Armor: [chuckles] You tell me. She was your foalsitter.
: Twilight Sparkle: Ohmygoshohmygosh! Cadance is only the most amazing pony ever! She's beautiful, she's caring, she's kind...
: Young Twilight Sparkle: I am so lucky to have you as my foalsitter!
: Young Cadance: I'm the one who's lucky, Twilight.
: Young Twilight Sparkle: [scoffs] You're a princess. I'm just a regular old unicorn.
: Young Cadance: You are anything but a regular old unicorn.
: Young Twilight and Young Cadance: Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake! Clap your hooves and do a little shake! [laughing]
: Wild Fire: I am going for a hooficure and that is that!
: Lucky Clover: You are not going–
: Wild Fire: I am! I am!
: Lucky Clover: I've already paid for three this month!
: Wild Fire: I... no! My girlfriends are all getting their hooves done! And you said that onl–
: Lucky Clover: Please, we've done this at least–
: Lucky Clover and Wild Fire: [suddenly stop arguing]
: Lucky Clover: Oh! Ho, ho, ho.
: Wild Fire: Oh, sweetie. You just did that face.
: Twilight Sparkle: How many unicorns can just spread love wherever they go? I only know of one! And you're marrying her! [sing-song voice] You're marrying Cadance! You're marrying Cadance!
: Princess Cadance: I hope I'm not interrupting anything important.
: Twilight Sparkle: Cadance! Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake! Clap your hooves and do a little shake!
: Princess Cadance: What are you doing?
: Twilight Sparkle: Cadance, it's me, Twilight!
: Princess Cadance: [uninterested] Uh-huh.
: Shining Armor: I've gotta get back to my station, but Cadance will be checking in with all of you to see how things are going. I think I speak for both of us when I say we couldn't be more excited to have you here. Right, dear?
: Princess Cadance: Absolutely.
: Shining Armor: Well, we'll let you get to it.
: [country music]
: Applejack: Cake, check. Ice sculpture, check. Best darn bite-size apple fritter you ever tasted...
: Twilight Sparkle: Mmm. Check.
: Spike: [deep voice] I do. Do you? [high voice] I do! [kissing noises] [laughs nervously]
: Applejack: Hiya, Princess!
: Princess Cadance: Please, call me Princess Mi Amore Cadenza.
: Applejack: Hiya, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. You come to check out what's on the menu for your big day?
: Princess Cadance: I have!
: [sinister chords]
: Princess Cadance: [gulp] Delicious! I love-love-love them. [laughs nervously]
: Applejack: Aw, shucks. Why don't you take a few to go? [squee] I know how you brides can be. So busy, you forget to get a little somethin' in your belly.
: [thud]
: Twilight Sparkle: [gasps]
: [door closes]
: Twilight Sparkle: Did... you see what she...
: Twilight Sparkle: Oh, you should have seen how she acted back there. I don't know when she changed, but she changed! [imitating Cadance] "Please, call me Princess Mi Amore Cadenza."
: Princess Cadance: Did I hear someone say my name?
: Rarity: Your highness! Let me just start by saying what an honor it is to play a role in such a momentous occasion. [laughs nervously]
: Princess Cadance: [unenthusiastically] Uh-huh. Is my dress ready?
: Rarity: [stammers] Yes, of course. Um, I've been working on it ever since I was given the assignment, and I think you'll be pleased with the results! Mmm!
: Princess Cadance: I was hoping for something with more beading and a longer train.
: Rarity: Oh, yes, of course.
: Princess Cadance: And those should be a different color.
: Twinkleshine: I think they're lovely.
: Minuette: Me too!
: Lyra Heartstrings: I love them.
: Princess Cadance: Make them a different color.
: Twilight Sparkle: Gee, maybe her name should be "Princess Demandy-pants."
: [pop]
: Pinkie Pie: Okay, let me see. We've been over the games... [rattles dice] ...the dances...
: [polka from Swarm of the Century plays and stops]
: Pinkie Pie: [gasps] I think this reception is gonna be perfect! Don't you?
: Princess Cadance: Perfect! ...If we were celebrating a six-year-old's birthday party.
: Pinkie Pie: [gasps] Thank you!
: Princess Luna: Rest, my sister. As always, I will guard the night.
: Twilight Sparkle: Bet I can guess what you're all thinking. Cadance is the absolute worst bride-to-be ever.
: Spike: [high voice] Who, me?
: Applejack: Spike! That goes on the cake.
: Spike: [laughs nervously]
: Rarity: Twilight, whatever are you talking about? Cadance is an absolute gem!
: Twilight Sparkle: Rarity, she was so demanding!
: Rarity: Well, of course she is! Why shouldn't she expect the very best on her wedding day?
: Twilight Sparkle: Applejack, did you know that after she told you how much she just 'love-love-loved' your hors d'eouvres, she threw them in the trash?
: Applejack: Aw, she was probably just trying to spare my feelin's.
: Twilight Sparkle: No, she was just being fake and totally insincere!
: Fluttershy: She did raise her voice at one of my birds during rehearsal.
: Twilight Sparkle: See? Rude!
: Fluttershy: But he was singing really off-key.
: [bird sings off-key]
: Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie Pie, you had to have noticed how Cadance treated–
: Pinkie Pie and Spike: [kissing noises and laughing]
: Twilight Sparkle: Never mind. Rainbow Dash, you're with me, right?
: Rainbow Dash: Sorry, Twi. Been too busy prepping for my sonic rainboom to pay much attention to the bride's bad attitude.
: Twilight Sparkle: [growls]
: Rarity: The princess is about to get married. I'm sure any negative behavior she might be displaying is simply the result of nerves.
: [thump]
: Twilight Sparkle: And I'm sure it's the result of being an awful pony who doesn't deserve to even know Shining Armor, let alone marry him!
: Applejack: Think maybe you're bein' just a tiny bit possessive of your brother?
: Rest of main cast: Uh-huh.
: Twilight Sparkle: I am not being possessive, and I am not taking it out on Cadance! You're all just too caught up in your wedding planning to notice that maybe there shouldn't even [thumps table] be a wedding!
: [knocking]
: Shining Armor: Twily! Your big brother's looking pretty good, don't you think? Huh. Everything okay?
: Twilight Sparkle: We need to talk. I think you're making a big–
: Princess Cadance: [clears throat]
: Shining Armor: Oh, uh, hi, sweetie.
: Twilight Sparkle: She sure has a way of sneaking up on people.
: Princess Cadance: Could I speak to you for a moment, dear?
: Shining Armor: Better see what she wants.
: Princess Cadance: [muffled] Look, we need to talk.
: Shining Armor: [muffled] I'm here to talk.
: Princess Cadance: [muffled] It's about your sister, okay?
: Shining Armor: [muffled] I– look, look, she's okay–
: Princess Cadance: [muffled] Just... listen to me, (over Shining Armor) alright? No no–
: Shining Armor: [muffled] I'm listening, I'm listening.
: Princess Cadance: [muffled] I thought I made it perfectly clear I didn't want you to wear that.
: Shining Armor: This was my favorite uncle's.
: Princess Cadance: And?
: Shining Armor: And I think I should wear it.
: Princess Cadance: Are you disagreeing with me?
: Shining Armor: I guess I am– Ah!
: Princess Cadance: Oh, dear. Are you getting another one of your headaches?
: Shining Armor: Gyah!
: Princess Cadance: Feeling better?
: Shining Armor: [grunts] Mm-hmm.
: Twilight Sparkle: She isn't just unpleasant and rude. She's downright evil!
: Shining Armor: Twilight!
: Princess Cadance: Let her go.
: Shining Armor: Huh. It seemed like she had something else she wanted to tell me.
: Princess Luna: Who goes there? Stay indoors, Twilight Sparkle.
: Twilight Sparkle: Shining Armor's in real trouble! You have to help–
: Rest of main cast: [various chatter]
: Twilight Sparkle: Dresses? What are you–?
: Fluttershy: Can you believe it? We're gonna be Princess Mi Amore Cadenza's new bridesmaids!
: Twilight Sparkle: New bridesmaids? What happened to her old bridesmaids?
: Applejack: She didn't say. But she did tell us that she would love-love-love it if we'd fill in for them.
: Rarity: Seeing as we've been working so hard and everything.
: Applejack: And you had your doubts about her.
: Rarity: Told you she was an absolute gem!
: Rainbow Dash: You sure this is what I should wear? Doesn't seem all that aerodynamic.
: Rarity: Hmm. I'll see what I can do.
: Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy: [excited chatter and laughing]
: Twilight Sparkle: Looks like I really am on my own.
: [church organ music]
: Princess Celestia: Perfect, girls. No need to rush. Then of course, Cadance will enter.
: [Wagner's "Bridal Chorus" plays]
: Princess Celestia: I'll say a few words, and then we'll begin with the vows. Shining Armor, you'll get the ring from your best mare.
: Spike: [deep voice] Do you? [high voice] I do!
: Shining Armor: Hey... has anypony seen Twilight?
: [doors open]
: Twilight Sparkle: I'm here! I'm not gonna stand next to her! And neither should you!
: Shining Armor: I'm sorry, I... I don't know why she's acting like this.
: Princess Cadance: Maybe we should just ignore her.
: Twilight Sparkle: You have to listen to me!
: Fluttershy: Oh, goodness! Are you okay?
: Twilight Sparkle: I'm fine.
: Applejack: Ya sure about that?
: Twilight Sparkle: I've got something to say! She's evil!
: Rest of main cast: [concerned chattering]
: Royal guard: [inaudible comment to other guard]
: Twilight Sparkle: She's been horrible to my friends, she's obviously done something to her bridesmaids, and if that wasn't enough, I saw her put a spell on my brother that made his eyes go all [bells jangling]!
: Princess Cadance: [begins to cry] Why are you doing this to me?!
: Twilight Sparkle: Because you're evil!
: Princess Cadance: [runs away crying]
: Twilight Sparkle: Evil! And if I don't stop you, you're gonna ruin my brother's life!
: [smack]
: Shining Armor: You want to know why my eyes went all [bells jangling]? Nuh! Because ever since I started having to perform my protection spell, I've been getting terrible migraines. Cadance hasn't been casting spells on me. She's been using her magic to heal me!
: Twilight Sparkle: [inhales]
: Shining Armor: And she decided to replace her bridesmaids because she found out the only reason they wanted to be in the wedding was so that they could meet Canterlot royalty! And if she hasn't been on her best behavior with your [stomps hoof] friends, it's because with me being so busy, she's had to make all the decisions about the wedding!
: Twilight Sparkle: I was just trying to–
: Shining Armor: She's been completely stressed out because it's really important to her that our big day be perfect! Something that obviously wasn't important to you! [gasps] Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and comfort my bride. And you can forget about being my best mare. In fact, if I were you, I wouldn't show up to the wedding at all.
: Applejack: C'mon, y'all. Let's go check on the princess.
: Twilight Sparkle: I was–
: Princess Celestia: You have a lot to think about.
: [doors slam]
: Twilight Sparkle: Maybe I was being overprotective. I could've gained a sister. But instead... I just lost a brother.
:: He was my big brother, best friend
:: Forever...
:: And now, we'll never do anything
:: Together...
: [smashing noise]
: Twilight Sparkle: I'm sorry!
: Princess Cadance: You will be.
: [flames crackling]
: [To be continued...]
: [music]
: [credits]