Snow Bored/Script

The following is a transcript for "Snow Bored".
==Script==
Trolls: [excited] "HOORAY!!! WOO HOO!!! Snow Day!! Snow Day!! Snow Day!!" [Branch appears] 
Branch: "This just in. There will not be a snow day."
[The trolls are surprised and stop cheering.] "Once I sprinkle salt all across the village, we'll have no trouble getting across."
[They all boo at Branch.]
Chenille: [angrily] "WHY WOULD YOU RUIN OUR SNOW DAY?!"
Branch: "Ahem." [pulls a chart down] "Snow can be slippery and hazardous. 39% of accidents and snow-related injuries occur in just a centimeter of it. There's also a chance of a pile of snow falling on us and giving us frostbite."
Cooper: "But, Branch, snow days are fun!!!"
Branch: [presses a button and the chart goes up.] "I rest my case. Besides, I fail to see how frolicking in frozen temperatures like a bunch of nitwits is fun."
Poppy: "What if we could show you how fun snow days can be? Then would you call off the salt?"
[The trolls agree with Poppy and are excited to help Branch]
Cooper: "Yeah! Fun! Fun!"
Trolls: "Fun! Fun! Fun"!
Branch: [Calling for attention] "Fine!! But only because I can't stand to hear you chant inanely."
[The trolls cheer as they walk off.]
Cooper: [stops walking] "Wait, I thought we were chanting "fun"."
----[The next day, everybody is getting out into the village to have fun in the snow.]
Branch: [Annoyed] "Okay, you've got four hours. Dazzle me or it's no more snow days." [puts on his snow goggles.]
----[Poppy runs while pulling Branch on the sled.]
Poppy: "Woo! Sledding! What do you think, Branch?"
Branch: [Grumpily] "I think my butt is cold." [The sled hits a rock] "Whoa!" [he falls off] "And now bruised."
----[Poppy finishes building an igloo. She peeks her head from inside.]
Poppy: "Here's another snow day classic. Snow Fort!!! Come on in. You gotta check out the built in cup holders." [goes in]
Branch: "Hmm... lacks crossbeams, low baring walls, a solid foundation..."
Poppy: "All choices that I made."
Branch: "Hardly up to code."
[After Branch touches the igloo, it falls apart.]
Poppy: "It's collapsible too."
[Biggie comes]
Biggie: "How about letting old Bigs take the reins?"
Poppy: "Knock yourself out. My butt is cold. And bruised."
----[Biggie made a snow-troll.]
Biggie: "Say hello to Mr. Twig Arms!"
Branch: "Huh. So, what does Mr. Twig Arms do?"
Biggie: "Uh... nothing. But, he's awful jolly."
Branch: That's nice, but I built something too. 
[presses a button on Gary and a robot appears out of a nearby rock, making buzzing noises.] "Say hello to Mr. Reinforced Titanium Alloy Arms." [The robot is searching for a target to destroy. It scans the snowman. It shoots lasers at Mr. Twig Arms, causing it to go red and become destroyed.] "Sorry, I forgot he has jolly seeking lasers."
----
[Satin and Chenille are ice skating.]
Satin: Here are the returning champions, Satin and Chenille! About to execute a triple salchow!"[they perform their triple salchow and stick the landing.] "Come on, Branch! It's your turn!"
Branch: [counting formulas] "Based on water density, air temp, and the weight of an average troll, multiply by two, that ice should give way in 3, 2..."
[The ice breaks and Satin and Chenille fall into the water.]
Chenille: "Dang it."
Branch: ""Dang it"'s right. I was one second off."
----[Branch and Keith are making snow angels.]
Branch: "What exactly are we doing?"
Keith: "Laying in the snow. It's my favorite snow game."
Branch: [Glumly] "How do you win? By getting hypothermia?"
Keith: "Yes."
----[Cooper is holding a bucket full of snow in his mouth with Smidge filling it and grinning next to him. Smidge takes the bucket.]
Cooper: "Watch this, Branch. You're gonna love snow pranks."
[The three walk up to Biggie who is rebuilding his snow-troll. Cooper and Smidge wink at Branch, who is confused and Cooper and Smidge each put a snow ball in the back of Biggie's pants.]
Cooper and Smidge: "FROST BUTT!!"
Biggie: [panics and shivers] "Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold, cold!"
Cooper: [laughs] "Oh, man. Classic!"
Biggie: [still shivering] "Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold!"
Branch: "Frostbite is actually a thing, and from what I read about it, losing a butt cheek to it would be no laughing matter."
Cooper: "Eesh, I'd really like to make a crack right now. But, it's snow time to be cheeky." [laughing] "Get it?"
Branch: "Unfortunately, yes."
Biggie: [still shivering] "Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold!"
----[DJ Suki and Branch are on a bobsled while the others watch.]
DJ Suki: "Representing Troll Village in the World Bobsled Finals, it's DJ Suki and Branch!! Oh, yeah!!" [starts the sled on the slope.]
Branch: "Woah, woah, woah... Stop!!!"
DJ Suki: [slips and accidentally lets the sled move away.] "Uh-oh."
Branch: "This won't end well."
[Branch goes really fast and falls off from his sled screaming in panic and falls in the snow. The other trolls gasp and come to his location.]
Poppy: "Um...Nice snow angel, Branch!"
Branch: "It's over, guys. Snow days are both pointless and a health hazard. So I'm unleashing the salt."
Trolls: "NOOOOOOOO!!!!!"
----[The trolls complain at Branch.]
Poppy: "Aw, come on! Seriously?"
Branch: "My mind is made up, and there's no talking me out of it."
[Someone throws a snowball at Branch.]
Branch: [angry] "Alright, who did that?"
[The trolls move away and reveal that it was Biggie.]
Biggie: "Aw, you grasses!"
Branch: "Oh, it's on..."
Biggie: "Haha. What are you going to do..."
[Branch throws a snowball at Biggie.]
Branch: "Huh. That was actually quite satisfying."
[Branch makes another snowball.]
DJ Suki: [helping Biggie up with Poppy] "Here, Biggie."
Poppy: "Let's help you up."
[Branch throws a snowball at Biggie again, and the others as well.]
Branch: "Hey, this is kind of...f...[he struggles to say it] f..."
Poppy: "...fun?"
Branch: "Yeah!"
[The trolls are having fun with snowballs.]
----[Later at nighttime, Poppy is blowing at her hot cocoa.]
Branch: "Hey, Poppy. Thanks for today. You made a snow day convert out of me."
Poppy: "Well, I'm glad you had fun. Especially since the snow might melt by tomorrow morning."
----[The next day, the trolls come by Poppy's pod while she is still sleeping.]
DJ Suki: "Poppy, wake up! It's a snow day miracle."
Poppy: "DJ Suki, what are you talking about?"
Satin: [joyful] "Look outside!"
[Poppy looks out the window to see it's another snow day.]
Poppy: "What in the what? How is this even possible?"
Biggie: My wishing stone must have worked! [Takes out a red gem]
Branch: Nope. I talked to the cloud people. They pulled a few strings, and a little cloud-seeding later," [Excitedly shakes his fists] "We have ourselves another snow day!"
Biggie: I still think it was you, Wishing stone. [He kisses the stone] Hm. You taste like cinnamon.
----[Outside, Poppy walks up a hill with a sled. She adjusts her hat to make herself more comfortable and takes off.]
Poppy: "YEAH!!!!"
[Suddenly, Branch blasts snowballs at her and Poppy crashes into a tree where a pile of snow falls onto her.]
Branch: [laughs] "There's nothing like another whole day of lobbing frozen projectiles. WOO HOO!! Snow day!!!"
----[Biggie is making another snow-troll.]
Biggie: "Ah. Even better."
[Suddenly, Branch starts firing snowballs and makes a hole on Mr. Twig Arms Jr.]
Biggie: [gasps] "Mr. Twig Arms Jr.!"
Branch: [laughs] "Look alive, Biggie! Mr. Twig Arms sure doesn't."
----[DJ Suki is riding her sled when suddenly Branch appears on his own one.]
Branch: "Hey, DJ Suki!" [busts out a snowball gatling gun] "Say hello to my not-so-little friend." [laughs as he throws snowballs at her.] Snow daaaaaaaaaaaaay!
[DJ Suki falls into Poppy's fort.]
Poppy: "Dang it."
----[Branch comes by with a bazooka loaded with snow.]
Branch: "Hey, guys! I want to show you my latest creation: the Ultra Snowzooka! Patent pending." [Looks around] "Guys? Where'd they go?"
[The others are hiding.]
Poppy: "We've created a monster!"
DJ Suki: "At least we're safe in here."
Smidge: "Yeah. It's not like he can bring snow inside our pods."
[Branch shoots snow at them and they yelp at their ambush.]
Branch: "Behold, my latest latest creation! Indoor snow! Patent pending!" [Branch starts shooting snowballs and laughs while his friends run off terrified.]
----[Satin and Chenille are hiding in their pod's closet.]
Satin: [to Chenille] Branch is literally out of control." [pants in fear]
Branch: [opens the door] "Actually, I've never felt more in control, or more alive!" [the twins scream offscreen as Branch shoots them with snow.]
----[Biggie is checking outside of his pod and runs to the outhouse. In the outhouse, Branch shoots snow.]
Biggie: ​[runs out of the outhouse with his pants down while screaming.] "Is nothing sacred?!"
[Branch laughs evilly]
----[Poppy and Smidge are hiding in Poppy's pod.]
Poppy: "We should be safe under here."
Smidge: [holds a bag of brown nuts] "I brought chestnuts for roasting."
Branch: [up on the "roof"] "YOO HOO! Here's Jack Frost nipping at your nose!"
[Branch shoots snow into the window.]
Poppy: "Oh, shoot." [the snow covers them.]
----[Guy Diamond and Cooper are hiding in a large log.]
Guy:That maniac will never find us here.
[suddenly, a massive snowball rolls from one side and the two run for it screaming until it rolls over them both]
----[it is now night in Troll Village] 
Branch: "You chumps ready for tomorrow? 'Cause my snow powered tank sure is!"[clicks a button]
[Outside, the tank sends more snow.]
Trolls: "NOOOOO!!!"
Poppy: "Branch, please, enough! You have to call off the snow day. Use your special salt!"
Branch: "But I'm really looking forward to another snow day. You guys convinced me, they are f-f- fun! See I can actually say it, now."
Poppy: "I think we've had enough fun". [The trolls beg Branch to call off the snow day.]
DJ Suki: "Please! We gotta go back to gather things!"
Guy Diamond: "We want to be able to go back to the markets!"
Branch: "Well, that's a bummer. But I guess I've been fairly outvoted."
Cooper: "So... enough of the snow?"
[Branch nods and the trolls cheer.]
Poppy: "Thanks, Branch."
Branch: "No problem, Poppy. Now let's call it a night, we've got a lot to do tomorrow."
----[The next morning, Branch is sitting in his tank, which now shoots the salt.]
Branch: [to the readers] "Well, mission accomplished. My master plan was a major success. I'm pretty sure they won't be wanting anymore snow days." [rises out of the tank] "And now that I've repurposed my snow tank to a salt-spraying, snow-melting de-icer, it's time for some fun my own way."
[Branch makes the tank move forward and spray salt as the other trolls follow him and cheer.]
Poppy: [to the readers; confused] "Wait. What just happened? "