Gaston (song)

"Gaston" is a song sung by Gaston (Richard White), LeFou (Jesse Corti), Gaston's Cronies, The Bimbettes, and the Villagers in Beauty and the Beast. It was sung to cheer up Gaston after Belle rejected his marriage proposal, and was started by LeFou. It is most famous for the memetic phrase "No one [verb]s like Gaston," which became so popular it even became Gaston's catchphrase in House of Mouse.
==Plot==
After Belle humiliates him while rejecting his marriage proposal, Gaston sulks at the fireplace within his tavern. To lift his spirits, LeFou and the villagers sing about how Gaston is good at basically everything and that no one compares to him. This successfully cheers him up. After the song, Maurice barges into the tavern, frantically seeking assistance to rescue Belle from the Beast. Believing he's lost his sanity upon dishing out such a seemingly implausible story, he is thrown out of the tavern. However, Gaston is inspired by Maurice's supposedly far-fetched tale to force Belle into marrying him and sings a reprise of the song with LeFou, to whom he explains his plan, which is to throw Maurice in the asylum in attempt to blackmail Belle to be his wife.
==Lyrics==
<tabber>
Original film=
Gaston: Who does she think she is? That girl has tangled with the wrong man. No one says no to Gaston.
LeFou: Heh, darn right!
Gaston: Dismissed. Rejected. Publicly humiliated. Why, it's more than I can bear.
LeFou: Uh, more beer?
Gaston: What for? Nothing helps. I'm disgraced.
LeFou: Who, you? Never! Gaston, you've got to pull yourself together.
Gosh, it disturbs me to see you, Gaston
Looking so down in the dumps
Every guy here'd love to be you, Gaston
Even when taking your lumps
There's no man in town as admired as you
You're everyone's favorite guy
Everyone's awed and inspired by you
And it's not very hard to see why!
No one's slick as Gaston
No one's quick as Gaston
No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston
For there's no man in town half as manly!
Perfect, a pure paragon!
You can ask any Tom, Dick or Stanley
And they'll tell you whose team they prefer to be on!
LeFou and Chorus: No one's been like Gaston
A king pin like Gaston
LeFou: No one's got a swell cleft in his chin like Gaston
Gaston: As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating!
LeFou and Chorus: My, what a guy, that Gaston!
Give five "hurrahs!" Give twelve "hip-hips!"
LeFou: Gaston is the best and the rest is all drips!
Chorus: No one fights like Gaston
Douses lights like Gaston
Stanley: In a wrestling match, nobody bites like Gaston!
Bimbettes: For there's no one as burly and brawny
Gaston: As you see, I've got biceps to spare
LeFou: Not a bit of him's scraggly or scrawny.
Gaston: That's right! And every last inch of me's covered with hair!
Chorus: No one hits like Gaston
Matches wits like Gaston
LeFou: In a spitting match, nobody spits like Gaston
Gaston: I'm especially good at expectorating! Ptoooie!
Chorus: Ten points for Gaston!
Gaston: When I was a lad, I ate four dozen eggs
Ev'ry morning to help me get large
And now that I'm grown, I eat five dozen eggs
So I'm roughly the size of a barge
Chorus: No one shoots like Gaston
Makes those beauts like Gaston
LeFou: Then goes tromping around
Wearing boots like Gaston!
Gaston: I use antlers in all of my decorating!
[Heard only in the soundtrack version]
Chorus:
Say it again!
Who's a man among men?
And then say it once more
Who's that hero next door?
Who's a super success?
Don't you know? Can't you guess?
Ask his fans and his five hangers-on
There's just one guy in town
Who's got all of it down...
LeFou: And his name's G-A-S... T...
G-A-S-T-E...
G-A-S-T-O... ohh, ow...
Chorus: Gaston!!!
[Heard only in the film version]
Chorus: My what a guy!
Gaston!
|-|Reprise=
Maurice: Help! Someone help me!
Bartender: Maurice?
Maurice: Please! Please, I need your help! He's got her! He's got her locked in a dungeon!
Tom: Who?
Maurice: Belle! We must go! Not- Not a minute to lose!
Gaston: Whoa! Slow down, Maurice. Who's got Belle locked in a dungeon?
Maurice: A beast!! A horrible monstrous beast!!!
[the tavern patrons laugh]
Dick: Is it a big beast?
Maurice: Huge!
Stanley: With a long, ugly snout?
Maurice: Hideously ugly!
Gramps: And sharp, cruel fangs?
Maurice: Yes! Yes! Will you help me?!
Gaston: Alright, old man. We'll help you out.
Maurice: You will? Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!
[Maurice gets thrown out into the snow]
Tom: Crazy Old Maurice!
Dick: He's always good for a laugh.
Gaston: "Crazy Old Maurice," hmm? "Crazy Old Maurice." Hmm.
LeFou, I'm afraid I've been thinking
LeFou: A dangerous pastime
Gaston: I know,
But that wacky old coot is Belle's father
And his sanity's only so-so
Now the wheels in my head have been turning
Since I looked at that loony old man
See, I promised myself I'd be married to Belle
And right now I'm evolving a plan!
If I... *whispering*
LeFou: Yes?
Gaston: Then we... *whispering*
LeFou: No, would she?
Gaston: *whispering* Guess!
LeFou: Now I get it!
Gaston and LeFou: Let's go!
No one plots like Gaston
Gaston: Takes cheap shots like Gaston
LeFou: Plans to persecute harmless crackpots like Gaston!
Chorus: So his marriage we soon will be celebrating
My what a guy
Gaston!
(in the film version of reprise)
Maurice: Will no one help me?!
|-|Demo reprise=
Gaston: LeFou, I'm afraid I've been thinking
It's a dangerous pastime, I know
But that wacky old coot is Belle's father
And his sanity's only so-so
Now the wheels in my head have been turning
Since I looked at that loony old man
See, I've promised myself I'll be married to Belle
And right now I'm evolving a plan!
If I... *whispering*
LeFou: Yes?
Gaston: Then we... *whispering*
LeFou: No, would she?
Gaston: *whispering* Guess!
LeFou: Now I get it!
Gaston and LeFou: Let's go!
Chrous: No one plots like Gaston
Gaston: Takes cheap shots like Gaston
LeFou: Plans to persecute harmless crackpots like Gaston!
Gaston: Yes, I'm endlessly wildly resourceful
LeFou: As down to the depths you descend
Gaston: I won't even be mildly remorseful
Just as long as I get what I want in the end!
Chorus: Who has brains like Gaston
Entertains like Gaston
LeFou: Who can make up these endless refrains like Gaston?
Chorus: And his marriage we soon will be celebrating
Say it again!
Who's a ten out of ten?
Then let's say it once more
Like we did heretofore
He's a champ, he's an ace
It's all over his face
He's got brains and especially brawn
It's Gaston!
Gaston: Thank you boys!
Chorus: Gaston!
Gaston: Oh, please!
Chorus: Gaston!!!
Gaston: That's me!
|-|2017 version=
LeFou: Gosh, it disturbs me to see you, Gaston
Looking so down in the dumps
Every guy here'd love to be you, Gaston
Even when taking your lumps
There's no man in town as admired as you
You're everyone's favorite guy
Everyone's awed and inspired by you
And it's not very hard to see why!
No one's slick as Gaston
No one's quick as Gaston
No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston's
For there's no man in town half as manly!
Village Lasses: Perfect, a pure paragon!
LeFou: You can ask any Tom, Dick or Stanley
And they'll tell you whose team they prefer to be on
LeFou and Chorus: Who plays darts like Gaston
Who breaks hearts like Gaston
LeFou: Who's much more than the sum of his parts like Gaston?
Gaston: As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating!
LeFou and Chorus: My what a guy, that Gaston!
Gaston: I needed encouragement--thank you, LeFou!
LeFou: Well, there's no one as easy to bolster as you! ...Too much?
Gaston: Yep.
Chorus: No one fights like Gaston
Douses lights like Gaston
LeFou: In a wrestling match, nobody bites like Gaston!
Gaston: When I hunt, I sneak up with my quiver
And beasts of the field say a prayer
First, I carefully aim for the liver
Then I shoot from behind
LeFou: Is that fair?
Gaston: I don't care.
Chorus: No one hits like Gaston
Matches wits like Gaston
LeFou: In a spitting match, nobody spits like Gaston
Gaston: I'm especially good at expectorating! *spits*
Chorus: Ten points for Gaston!
Gaston: When I was a lad, I ate four dozen eggs
Ev'ry morning to help me get large
And now that I'm grown, I eat five dozen eggs
So I'm roughly the size of a barge!
(instrumental break)
LeFou and Chorus: Who has brains like Gaston
Entertains like Gaston
Gaston: Who can make up these endless refrains like Gaston?
I use antlers in all of my decorating
Chorus: Say it again!
Who's a man among men?
Who's a super success?
Don't you know? Can't you guess?
Ask his fans and his five hangers-on
There's just one guy in town
Who's got all of it down...
LeFou: And his name's G-A-S... T...
I believe there's another T...
It just occurred to me that I'm illiterate and I've never actually had to spell it out loud before...
Chorus: Gaston!!!
</tabber>
==Gallery==
Beauty and the Beast OST - 04 - Gaston|Full soundtrack version
Beauty and the Beast (1991) - Gaston (Reprise) -UHD-
Gaston (Reprise)-2|Audio only
Beauty and the Beast (Live Action) - Gaston - IMAX Open Matte Version
Gaston (From "Beauty and the Beast"-Audio Only)
Beauty and the Beast Broadway OST - 09 - Gaston
【曲のみ】強いぞ、ガストン from Disney Music Parade 【ミューパレ】
Time for Tea - Disney Speedstorm (Original Game Soundtrack) - Gameloft Barcelona
Main Hall - Disney Speedstorm (Original Game Soundtrack) - Gameloft Barcelona
==Trivia==
*The version of the song featured on the soundtrack notably includes a small scene where LeFou tries to spell out Gaston's name, but fails and ultimately gives up. This scene was cut from the film's version, however. This stanza was reinstated in the 2017 version, with LeFou justifying why he is unable to spell it by mentioning that he is illiterate.
*The song was originally supposed to have different lyrics. However, the test lyrics proved to be so popular during development that they were used in the final version.
*The third issue of the Marvel Comics serial for Beauty and the Beast's ending had Gaston and LeFou engaging in similar dialogue to the beginning of the Gaston song.
*In the reprise, the final verses in the film version imply that the entire village (exempting possibly the Bimbettes) knew and agreed with Gaston's plans of blackmail.
**The Broadway version, however, omits this implication by having everyone leave the tavern before Gaston and LeFou start plotting. Consequentially, this resulted in LeFou and Gaston actually singing the final verses in the musical, which had previously been reserved for the chorus in the film. In addition, the comic adaptation also cuts out the song entirely and implies that, besides LeFou and the warden, no one actually knew about the plot.
***The lyrics used in the Broadway version of the reprise were based on the version of the song used in the first draft, barring that in the first draft, it was implied with the final lyrics that everyone, or at least Gaston's buddies, proceeded to sing the final lyrics.http://www.pages.drexel.edu/~ina22/splaylib/Screenplay-Beauty_and_the_Beast.pdf
**In addition, the live action version had additional lyrics where Gaston explains that he tends to shoot his prey from behind regardless of whether it was fair, foreshadowing his nearly killing Beast via that method. These lyrics were also in the first draft for the original film.
*According to the first draft of Linda Woolverton's take of the film, the song, or at least how it was presented in the draft, was taken from similar melodies in the operetta .
*In the initial draft for the lyrics, the lyrics "In a wrestling match, nobody bites like Gaston" and "For there's no one as burly and brawny" were originally intended to be sung by LeFou, while in the final version, they were sung by Stanley and the Bimbettes, respectively.
*In the animated film, when singing how he's roughly the size of a barge, Gaston flexes his muscles. In the live-action film, Gaston lifts up LeFou and a bar patron on his shoulders.
*The song can be seen as an allegory for enabling someone's vices instead of correcting them as LeFou and the villagers stroke Gaston's ego rather than tell him how he can improve himself as a person.
*According to Don Hahn, the audition song for the character of LeFou was "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" because of its similarity to this song.
==References==
==External links==
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pt-br:Gaston (canção)
es:Gaston (canción)
fr:Gaston (chanson)
it:Gaston (canzone)
sv:Gaston (sång)
Category:Songs
Category:Villain songs
Category:Beauty and the Beast songs
Category:Area-Music
Category:Group songs
Category:Reprise
Category:Songs with alternate lyrics
Category:High School Musical: The Musical: The Series songs
Category:Disney Speedstorm songs
Category:Songs in video games