Apathy

topaz/apathy ♦ she/they ♦ ♦ rain/night ♦ editor
Jello 	Jello
 	
Credits 	Credits
Owner 	frosty
Creator 	sakura
Artist 	sakura
Coder 	modified by frostybase cr. himmalerin
Background 	brandon hoult
Inspirations 	Inspirations
Theme 	regret, self-hatred, depression
Animal 	tree frog
Song 	Untitled - Simple Plan (nightcore)
Character 	Character
Full Name 	Topaz
Age 	7 years
Hatching Date 	november 16
Gender 	demigirl
Pronouns 	she/herthey/them
Orientation 	lesbian
Occupation 	editor for the Eclipse's Glimpses magazine
Tribe 	75% rainwing, 25% nightwing
Goal 	to forgive herself and apologize to Jello for the curse one dayto study marine biology in the future
Residence 	Sanctuary
Relatives 	Watermelon (father)Opulence (mother)
Allies 	family
Enemies 	Jello (former rival), homophobes
Likes 	desserts, calm environments, alone time, soothing music, emotional lyrics, sunny days, reassurance, friendship, daydreams of romance, stories with good endings, the smell of books and scrolls
Dislikes 	anything to do with horror, bitter foods, rain, lightning, herself, making mistakes, her animus magic (mixed feelings), self-centered dragons, cruelty
Abilities 	very limited color shifting (light blues and greens), animus magic, tree-climbing, observance
Weapons 	animus magic (only as last resort)
Love Interests	n/a
Quote 	“It's all my fault. I thought I was better, but it turned out that I was even more horrible than who I didn't want to be.”
Appearance
It's just me. Although, I wouldn't consider it to be an honor to have met a dragon like me.
Eclipse's Glimpses was Sanctuary's most popular magazine, and you could only imagine who was behind the management of all its articles. Most would not expect a regretful animus dragon, hoping to atone for their mistakes one day, would be the editor behind all the daily gossip, and neither would they know that she used to go by a different name. 
Topaz, or Apathy, as she is now known to the public as, is a young hybrid dragon with average height. They aren't particularly big, not someone that you would notice immediately in a crowd. She is mostly of RainWing descent, as seen through her general body shape, frills and scale patterns. If you look closely enough, there are some giveaways to their NightWing blood; Apathy's horns are straight instead of curved like pureblooded RainWings, and all the spines on their back are much too sharp to miss. 
Unlike a true RainWing, Apathy does not have every color on the spectrum available on their scales. Instead, they are always fluctuating between shades of light blues and greens, ranging from light mint, cyan, aqua and sky blue. Her extra scales on the back and forehead are a fixed color, being a deep teal. Their underbelly can also have shifting shades, but it is mainly a mix of jade green and turquoise. Starry white dots adorn both her extra scales and underbelly, with faint lines connecting them resembling constellations, something from her NightWing heritage. Apathy's frills also vary in color, but most often they are seen being a shade of medium turquoise.
There are several things that Apathy cannot alter the color of: firstly, their wing membranes, which are a cool steel blue color. Secondly, the sharp spines on her back, wing spikes and all her claws are all dark teal, appearing to be deep forest green at some angles. Thirdly, their two straight horns are a gradient fading from pale mint to turquoise. Finally, Apathy's eyes are a bright, sharp cyan, the one feature of theirs that never seems to dull in comparision to the rest of her colors. 
With the way she carries herself, most assume Apathy to be naturally unfriendly and antisocial, and the fact that they always keep their gaze averted from other dragons does not help. If she ever looks into your eyes directly, you might see flashes of sadness, regret, and anger, but an anger that is so deeply rooted within that it isn't directed at anyone, or even anything in the world, but rather at themself. 
Personality
It's only fair that I won't walk this path anymore, after I stole another dragon's life away from her.
Apathy isn't a dragon with their entire personality written on their face, and as they are someone of few words, getting to properly understand her will take a long time, or even a lifetime as an outsider.
She's an introvert, never really speaking up unless she's spoken to, and tends to not do well in social situations. Apathy enjoys quiet environments where they can be left to their own devices, and in general does not seek out companionship unless another dragon offered (even so, she would most likely decline in most situations). 
This dragon is someone who would avoid the spotlight at all costs, and at some point when they were younger, they were even horrified of it until they discovered their talent for singing. Even so, Apathy still prefers to blend in the background and when asked about her skills, she would humbly tone them down. She does not like taking charge of things, a lot of times believing that anyone else could do a better job than them. While humble, their tendencies to downplay every action of theirs come across as self-depreciating - and to some extent, that is true.
Apathy's quiet nature is often dangerous to herself: she will bottle up all her feelings and opinions, even those that mattered, and shove important issues to the back until they are too great to resolve. It is frustrating to talk to them sometimes when they are actively avoiding the elephant in the room, and sometimes need a shove from an outsider to be confrontational. Their inability to communicate their feelings such as jealousy and hurt was what led to them to make their worst mistake, something that she blames herself wholeheartedly for. 
Adding on the previous point, this dragon holds on to almost everything in the past, not really knowing how to let go or forgive anyone, be it herself or others. They do not like themselves yet doesn't make too much moves to change, and in their own words, they are too much of a coward to apologize or own up to their wrongdoings. These days, Apathy appears moody, depressed and in a state of unhealthy seclusion, believing that they are unworthy of love or attention. She often feels guilty whenever others are nice to her, as she thinks she doesn't deserve it after an immoral action she had committed.
To others in their minimal interactions, Apathy appears polite and easy to reason with, only because they are too unwilling to stir up drama they have to confront. She would always stamp down her own opinions to blindly follow the crowd, if only it meant she did not need to defend any of her own stances. She has a lot of thoughts that she keeps to herself, and has a vivid imagination that is fueled by her love of reading. They see books as a form of escape from life, and often fantasizes about living in a different world where they can be free of all their problems. She is also a huge romantic and daydreams of having a loving girlfriend all the time, subconsciously knowing that with her seclusion, it wasn't really possible. 
Despite all of their flaws, a lot of Apathy's qualities could also be her strengths; she might appear spineless to a lot of dragons, but her careful choice of words comes from the fact that she is genuinely kind and dislikes hurting others. They have immense respect for other dragons, especially those they recognize great talent or potential in, and is great at keeping boundaries. Their nature is by default non-hostile, even if they seem to present otherwise, and they loathe extended arguments or conflict. Their quietness attributes to their observance, and they are very sharp at picking up details others will miss. 
Apathy is surprisingly quite in tune with feelings, often having enough empathy to know what to or not to say to others. She is able to understand a lot of things that go deeper than the surface, and with their added observance, they are quite smart and hard to fool. It is ironic that she cannot come to terms with her own emotions and is horrible at handling them - in fact, a lot of times, Apathy is more capable of solving someone else's problems rather than their own. Perhaps they could if they weren't so insistent of keeping them to themself, or sweeping everything under the rug. 
They don't trust others easily by default - this is something they are working on, wishing to open up to others more so that one day they could seek the romance they so frequently dream of. With those that have already established a bond with her, Apathy displays certain traits that is virtually unseen to anyone else. She can be very generous and even selfless, and her empathy makes it so that she is very in touch with everyone else's emotions. They love making their loved ones happy, and can even sacrifice a lot on their own end for it to happen. They also feel immense guilt after hurting others - but especially those that they love. 
Beneath her silence, Apathy is a dragon with a kind side and a lot of musical talent, as well as a bit of wild dreams and a lot of regret. She hopes to one day get over her self-hatred and forgive herself for her mistake, but that has to start with apologizing to the one she wronged. And that's one of their greatest challenges for themself: to build up enough courage to do the right thing. 
History
I have to ask myself everytime they write me a letter, telling me how much they miss me. Why? Why would they want a dragonet that had only disappointed them?
Apathy's parents did not have a very happy beginning: her mother, Opulence, came from a very fragmented family that mainly resulted from her NightWing ancestors' dislike of RainWings, while Watermelon, her father, came from a background that disapproved of hybrids and romance between tribes. Regardless, the two of them fought against all odds and formed a healthy, stable relationship, and they left the Rainforest where they first met as an act of rebellion and freedom. 
When they had Apathy's egg, the two agreed that whatever it was, they would never raise their dragonet to be anything like their family - instead, the new parents would teach the dragonet inside the bright, blue shiny egg to love and accept everyone for who they are, and to learn how to both see and do good in the world. They were overjoyed when their dragonet hatched healthy and fine, with beautiful shimmering blue-green scales that reminded them of a gemstone. Due to that reason, she was given the name Topaz. 
At the time, Topaz was only a young dragonet, with no concept of identity. It did not matter a lot to her either - she was perfectly happy at home, as her parents treated her very well, almost to the point of spoiling her. They also fulfilled their shared promise to teach her all the right things - and young Topaz was quickly adopting an open-minded approach to the world around her. Her parents encouraged her to always seek them out whenever she faced any troubles, and they always did everything they could to cheer her up even over small things like getting a scratch due to tripping over a rock. Topaz grew up loving her parents a lot and felt bad whenever she thought she was being a nuisance. 
She was the quiet dragonet at school, and didn't really stand out at doing anything, until she discovered she could sing - quite well too, at the age of 3. Her shyness prevented her from frequently performing in front of others, but she cared about it enough to tell her parents, and they happily obliged by paying for advanced vocal training. Much to everyone's delight and surprise, Topaz breezed through the lessons and her singing got better day by day, slowly becoming a source of confidence that she previously lacked. 
Abilities & Weaknesses
... Oh. You're asking me for help. I can do it if no one else will, but honestly, you're better off asking someone else - they'll do better than me.
later mdudes
Relationships
You... want to befriend me? I'm not sure if that's a good idea. I've done some things that if you know, you wouldn't forgive me for it, you know.
Watermelon & Opluence: parents. loves them dearly but believes she has let them down
Jello: old rival that she cursed and now really regrets it
Trivia
Yes, I do eat meat. I'm okay with it being raw? What? I know I'm mostly RainWing, what's the problem with that?
*Apathy and Jello were created to be dual characters that are foils to each other but are heavily involved in each other's character development as well
**their contrasting traits are their outspoken/secluded traits, extroversion and introversion, carelessness and overcautiousness, as well as their sensitivity to the world around them
**each of their own positive character development makes the character closer in personality to their respective rival
*she dislikes rainy days as they always seem to dampen her mood
*despite being mostly RainWing, Apathy prefers to eat meat over any vegetarian diets. She also prefers her meat raw rather than cooked
**they also find most plants bitter and not really appetizing
*popsicles are her favorite treat
*loves strawberry flavored anything
Gallery
You say I'm beautiful, while I'm just a useless dragon who doesn't deserve whatever looks you think I have.
temporary ref, ignore it
reference base by plasmawolf2016
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9F67A21D-E3B9-4288-9EBD-55BDF3E0A09A.png|sakura
Category:Content (Frostflake-heart)
Category:Characters
Category:Females
Category:RainWings
Category:NightWings
Category:Hybrids
Category:Animus
Category:LGBT+
Category:Occupation (Writer)