Crassius Curio

Crassius Curio is an Imperial nobleman in the city of Vivec City, serving as a Councilor for House Hlaalu. He also writes adult novels.
==Background==
An Imperial Noble, Curio served as a House Hlaalu Councilor. He is also the author of The Lusty Argonian Maid and The Three Legged Guar (which does not appear in-game). He also has a residence in Vivec's Hlaalu Plaza. He owns a copy of the rare skill book, Lord Jornibret's Last Dance.
In the folio version of The Lusty Argonian Maid, Curio said he showed up to the Arano household, and instead of throwing him back on the streets, the Arano family allowed him to stay at their home.Lusty Argonian Maid Folio
==Personality==
He is notable due to his somewhat eccentric behavior, for example displaying bisexual tendencies when asking the Nerevarine to strip for him (including rings and amulets) to become their patron, regardless of their gender. He will also ask that the Nerevarine refer to him as "Uncle Crassius" and in turn will refer to them as "dumpling." Nevertheless, he is one of the few characters in House Hlaalu who is opposed to corruption. Many of his quests deal with ending the crooked reign of Odral Helvi in Caldera, during which you can either complete the shady quests according to Helvi's orders or ask Crassius what to do.
==Interactions==
Show: Main Quests
===Hlaalu Hortator===
The Nerevarine must become Hortator of House Hlaalu as part of fulfilling the Nerevarine Prophecy. Curio must be convinced to support the Nerevarine.
===Hortator and Nerevarine===
The Nerevarine must be titled Hortator of the Great Houses of Morrowind and Nerevarine by the Ashlander Tribes. Curio may inform the Nerevarine that Archcanon Saryoni wishes to speak with them.
Show: House Hlaalu Quests
===An Admiring Sponsor===
The Nerevarine must acquire a sponsorship from a councillor of House Hlaalu after becoming a lawman. Curio will offer his sponsorship under one condition.
===Velfred the Outlaw===
Once a lawman in House Hlaalu, Curio will task the Nerevarine with killing or collecting the fee owed by Velfred the Outlaw.
===Kill Banden Indarys===
After killing or persuading Velfred, Curio tasks the Nerevarine with killing Banden Indarys, a member of House Redoran.
===Bero's Support===
After killing Banden Indarys, Curio will instruct the Nerevarine to gain the support of a councillor. Curio recommends Dram Bero.
===Kill Reynel Uvirith===
After garnering the support of a Hlaalu councillor, Curio tasks the Nerevarine with killing Reynel Uvirith, a member of House Telvanni.
===Sealed Orders===
The Nerevarine will have gained the support of Curio and be given a set of tasks by Odral Helvi. The Nerevarine may choose to provide Curio with sealed orders they are provided instead of delivering it to the intended recipient.
===The Caldera Spy===
The Nerevarine will be tasked with retrieving stolen mining contracts and apprehending the thief. Curio will recommend that the Nerevarine try and spare the thief.
===Erroneous Documents===
The Nerevarine is asked to tamper with Hlaalu official records. Instead, the Nerevarine may choose to inform Curio of the deception.
===Rent and Taxes===
The Nerevarine is tasked with collecting owed rent and taxes from two farmers or kill them if they are unable to pay. Curio will recommend that the Nerevarine instead pay the sum on behalf of the farmers who cannot afford to make the payment themselves.
===Shipment of Ebony===
The Nerevarine is tasked by Helvi with delivering ebony ore to a smuggler. The Nerevarine may instead report the request to Curio.
Show: Miscellaneous Quests
===The Bad Actor===
The Nerevarine must deal with an annoying merchant in Vivec City. They learn that the merchant is looking to become an actor and the Nerevarine may direct them to Curio who himself is writing a play.
==Equipment==
*Extravagant Pants
*Extravagant Shirt
*Extravagant Shoes
*The Lusty Argonian Maid
==Dialogue==
Show: General Dialogue
"Yes, I'm Crassius Curio, but you can call me Uncle Crassius."
:Advancement "I can't advance you if you don't belong to House Hlaalu, can I dear?"
: "You don't have the qualifications I'm looking for just yet, . Maybe when you fill out a bit."
:Business "I can't talk about business to anyone who doesn't belong to House Hlaalu, sweetie."
: "I do not have any business for you right now, ."
:Crassius Curio "Ah, yes. That is my name. But it sounds like music when you say it."
:Dram Bero "Dram Bero is very secretive. He lives somewhere here in Vivec."
:Vassir Didanat Mine "Oh? How interesting. Alas, Vassir-Didanat is outside my jurisdiction. You might want to talk to Velanda Omani or Dram Bero."
Show: The Bad Actor
"Yes, I'm Crassius Curio, but you can call me Uncle Crassius."
:new play "It is almost completed. I call it "The Lusty Argonian Maid." It's a rather bawdy tale, but I think it will play well with the people. Be sweet to Uncle Crassius, and there's something in it for you, sweetcakes. Here, take a look at some of the work so far. I think it's scrumptious!"
:theater troupe "A company of players, yes! I would love to be able to form a company to put on my new play. But there are so few in the area that are willing to act, even for a good price. Of course, I need an actor with wit, grace, charm, and a firm...oh, never mind. You wouldn't be a bad choice, muffin, but you seem to have other matters to attend to. If you see someone else who fits the bill, send them to Uncle Crassius!"
::theater troupe "My troupe is coming together nicely, sweet bits."
After completing the quest:
"Yes, I'm Crassius Curio, but you can call me Uncle Crassius."
:new play "It's going to be fabulous, my little sweetroll. "The Lusty Argonian Maid" will stir the soul, touch the heart, and rouse the...masses from their slumber."
Show: Expelled from House Hlaalu
"You've been expelled, dumpling. But you can make amends, and everything will be just the way it was before."
:Advancement "I hate to say it, dumpling, but you've been expelled. You need to make amends with Uncle Crassius."
:Camonna Tong "Alas, you seem to have been expelled from House Hlaalu. When you make amends, speak with me again."
:Dram Bero "You've broken the rules of House Hlaalu, sweetie. It brings tears to my eyes when I think about your disloyalty. Maybe you can make amends and make everything better."
:erroneous documents "You've broken the rules of House Hlaalu, sweetie. It brings tears to my eyes when I think about your disloyalty. Maybe you can make amends and make everything better."
:rent and taxes "You've broken the rules of House Hlaalu, sweetie. It brings tears to my eyes when I think about your disloyalty. Maybe you can make amends and make everything better."
:respect House Hlaalu "Perhaps YOU'RE the one who doesn't respect House Hlaalu. But if you make amends, Uncle Crassius will make it all better."
:Caldera mining contracts
:Reynel Uvirith
:sealed orders
:shipment of ebony
:Velfred the Outlaw
:"You've broken the rules of House Hlaalu, sweetie. It brings tears to my eyes when I think about your disloyalty. Maybe you can make amends and make everything better."
:make amends "Yes, you've been expelled, sweetie, but a small consideration of 500 gold will make everything all better."
::Nevermind. "Let me know if you change your mind, pudding."
:: "You know I'd love to, but you just don't have 500 gold. I wish I could give you a discount, but there's nothing I can do."
::Pay 500 gold. "Uncle Crassius will take care of everything. You're back in good standing."
Show: Advancements
: "You'll still have to earn your advancement, dumpling. No, no, no, you can't just wiggle that snug little waist and change my mind this time."
: "You're an ideal candidate, dumpling, with all the skills we Hlaalu look for... But you just haven't done enough favors for me and the others in House Hlaalu."
: "No one questions your unshakable dedication to House Hlaalu, dumpling, but you need to work on those skills."
:Advancement "Congratulations, dumpling. You've earned the rank of House Cousin."
:Advancement "You've done everything you need to do for the rank of House Father, dumpling... Except build a stronghold. Go talk with Dondos Driler at the Hlaalu Council Manor in Balmora. He'll tell you everything you need to know."
::Advancement "You've done everything you need to do for the rank of House Father, dumpling... Except build a stronghold. Go talk with Dondos Driler at the Hlaalu Council Manor in Balmora. He'll tell you what you need... what? What did you say? You killed Dondos Driler? Without him, you'll never complete your stronghold, and never advance in House Hlaalu. Poor dear. You'll just have to be content with your current rank... AND my undying love and affection."
:Advancement "You need to build up your stronghold again, sweetie-pie, or else I can't make you a Councilman. Talk to Dondos Driler again. He'll tell you what you need to do."
::Advancement "You need to build up your stronghold again, sweetie-pie, or else I can't make you a Councilman. Talk to Dondos Driler again. He'll tell you what you need... what? What did you say? You killed Dondos Driler? Without him, you'll never complete your stronghold, and never advance in House Hlaalu. Poor dear. You'll just have to be content with your current rank... AND my undying love and affection."
:Advancement "I can't advance you any more, dumpling. You'll need to see Duke Vedam Dren himself to be a Councilor or even Grandmaster. The Duke is staying in Ebonheart this year. He was the Grandmaster of House Hlaalu, you know, before he inherited his title."
:Advancement "You're the new Grandmaster of House Hlaalu, . You even outrank your Uncle Crassius. How much farther do you want to go?"
Show: Hlaalu Hortator
In Curio Manor:
"Yes, I'm Crassius Curio, but you can call me Uncle Crassius."
:Crassius Curio "Ah, yes. That is my name. But it sounds like music when you say it."
:Hlaalu Hortator "A Hortator is a Great House war leader. It's an ancient tradition, seldom invoked in modern times."
::Ask how a Hortator is chosen. "As far as I recall, every one of Hlaalu's councilors must vote to choose a Hortator, and the vote must be unaminous. There must be some situation requiring a war leader, of course, and a worthy candidate who can perform a Hortator's duty."
::Tell your story and ask to be confirmed as Hortator. "You want to be Hortator? A pity. Orvas Dren does NOT want you to be Hortator. And very few councilors would be willing to risk Ser Dren's disapproval. But if you were to give me a small gift of 1000 drakes, I might reconsider."
:::Give Curio 1000 drakes. "What a thoughtful gift! How did you know? Gold! It's just what I wanted. And now it's time for YOUR gift... And I have just what you want. In my formal capacity as Councilor of House Hlaalu, I give you my vote for the title of Hortator. Perhaps I can also give you a little suggestion?"
::::little suggestion "I am sure you can persuade Dram Bero to support you as Hortator... if you can find him. Orvas Dren has Nevena Ules and Velanda Omani in his pocket. You might want to make a little trip to the Dren Plantation before talking to them. And then there's Yngling Half-Troll."
:::::Dram Bero "Dram Bero is very secretive. He lives somewhere here in Vivec."
:::::Orvas Dren "He is the head of the Camonna Tong and lives in a plantation in the Ascadian Isles. You may be able to bribe him or trick him. He despises the Empire, and I have heard rumors that he has made some kind of deal with the Sixth House."
:::::Nevena Ules "She lives in Ules Manor, near Suran. Just take the road north out of Suran, cross the bridge heading west, and look for a manor south of the road."
:::::Velanda Omani "Councilor Velanda Omani lives outside Vivec on Elmas Island. Take the bridge to the mainland from Telvanni Compound, then turn south and cross the bridge to Elmas Island. The path from the south end of the bridge leads right to Omani Manor."
:::::Yngling Half-Troll "Yngling Half-Troll is a foreigner like me, but he simply doesn't understand the Dunmer like I do. If you were to dispose of him, the other councilors would not be upset. If you kill any of the rest of us, of course, it is a different story. He lives in Yngling Manor in the St. Olms Canton."
::::Hlaalu Hortator "You certainly won my vote. Just use your charms on the other Hlaalu councilors. I'm sure you can get them to give you anything your precious little heart desires."
:::Stall for time. "Please! Take your time, my little flower. What is a little time between such intimate friends?"
After being named Hortator:
"I'm so glad to see you again, ."
:Hlaalu Hortator "All the councilors agree? Splendid! I'm so happy for you! What an honor! But no more than you deserve, pumpkin. And now, I have a little treat for you. It's a belt given to the Hortator of House Hlaalu. Just snug it around that supple little waist. Now, I know you have important things to do, but don't be a stranger. Don't neglect poor, lonely Uncle Crassius, your devoted admirer."
::Hlaalu Hortator "You are the Horator of House Hlaalu, ."
Show: An Admiring Sponsor
"You want me to be your sponsor in House Hlaalu? I thought you'd never ask... But first, I want to see who I'm dealing with. Show Uncle Crassius what you have to offer. That's right, don't be shy."
If approached again:
"Come on, dumpling, don't be shy. Just do this one little favor for Uncle Crassius."
After removing all clothing:
"Yes, I see we're going to get along just splendidly, sweetie-pie. You'll go far with my support. You're now a Kinsman of House Hlaalu."
Show: Sealed Orders
"I'm glad you stopped by, . I may have some business to discuss with you."
:Business "Speak with Odral Helvi in Caldera. Turn your charms on him, sweetie, and talk about business. If you feel his request is questionable, speak with me for further directions. Keep Uncle Crassius well informed, and I'll reward you."
After speaking to Odral Helvi:
"Have you done any more business with Odral Helvi? If he asks you to do something suspicious, keep me informed, and I will reward you, pudding."
:sealed orders "So he asked you to deliver orders to Tenisi Lladri instead of Baren Alen, the Treasury clerk? This is interesting. Give the orders to me instead, pudding, and I will take care of everything."
::Nevermind. "Well, I wouldn't advise giving them to Tenisi Lladri. You don't know what you might get involved in. I wouldn't want anything to happen to you, dumpling."
::Here they are. "Good, good. Now we have some proof of Odral's corruption, but it takes time for the wheels of law to turn. I will make sure these orders are... edited, sealed, and delivered to Tenisi Lladri. For being a sweetie and keeping me informed, why not take this gift of 500 drakes? Buy yourself something pretty for Uncle Crassius."
:::sealed orders "You've already given me the orders, pudding."
::::Business "You're doing well, dumpling. Just speak with Odral Helvi again and keep me informed."
Show: The Caldera Spy
"Have you done any more business with Odral Helvi? If he asks you to do something suspicious, keep me informed, and I will reward you, pudding."
:Caldera mining contracts "This does not sound suspicious. If you can, sweetie pie, keep the identity of the thief secret from Odral, but tell me who it is."
After learning who the thief is:
"Have you done any more business with Odral Helvi? If he asks you to do something suspicious, keep me informed, and I will reward you, pudding."
:Caldera mining contracts "Will you tell me who the thief is?"
::Lie. "I hoped you'd be more loyal. After all we've been through together..."
::Truth: Elmussa Damori. "Hm. I will try and get in touch with her. Oh, no, dumpling! No need to be jealous! Just don't tell Odral who the thief really is. Tell him you found the documents in a crate or something. Please take this little gift of 500 drakes for keeping me informed."
:::Caldera mining contracts "Just report back to Odral, dumpling, but don't tell him who the spy is."
Upon completion of the quest:
Caldera mining contracts "It sounds like you already took care of everything, my sweet."
If the thief is killed:
Caldera mining contracts "I wish you had spared Elmussa's life. No need to be jealous, sweetie, but I wish I knew more thieves."
Show: Erroneous Documents
"Have you done any more business with Odral Helvi? If he asks you to do something suspicious, keep me informed, and I will reward you, pudding."
:erroneous documents "Give me the old land deed, pudding, and Uncle Crassius will take care of everything."
::Keep Odral's land deed. "I just love it when you tease me, dumpling."
::Give him Odral's land deed. "Don't trouble your sweet little head over this anymore. If you don't have the original land deed, you'll still need to fetch that for Odral. When you speak with him again, turn your irresistible charms on him some more. Don't let him suspect a thing. And take this little present from me. Wouldn't want anything to happen to you."
:::erroneous documents "Don't worry your pretty little head about it. I'll take care of everything."
Show: Rent and Taxes
"Have you done any more business with Odral Helvi? If he asks you to do something suspicious, keep me informed, and I will reward you, pudding."
:rent and taxes "A few drakes is nothing to one as worldy as you or I, dumpling. The farmers may not have five drakes to spare, much less fifty, and I suspect Odral merely wants them killed. Here, take these 500 drakes for keeping me informed and pay the rent yourself. Don't risk your succulent skin trying to find the farmers."
::rent and taxes "Take the gold I just gave you and pay Odral Helvi yourself. Keep me informed of his actions and I will reward you."
After completing the quest:
rent and taxes "You dealt with the situation well, sweetie pie."
If the farmers were killed:
rent and taxes "I must say I am disappointed in you. Do you want to be a mere errand boy and assassin for the likes of Odral Helvi? Don't sell yourself short, dumpling."
Show: Shipment of Ebony
"Odral asked you to deliver a shipment of ebony?"
:Business "Make sure Odral Helvi gets arrested for the shipment of ebony he wants my little sweetheart to deliver."
:shipment of ebony "This is the last of the evidence we needed. Instead of delivering the ebony to Drinar Varyon, take it to Segunivus Mantedius at the Fort Buckmoth near Ald'ruhn. I bet if you turn your charms on Segunivus Mantedius, he will have Odral Helvi and Drinar Varyon arrested for this."
After going to Segunivus:
shipment of ebony "You did well, my little pudding pie. Odral Helvi is now on a prison ship. The same situation you found yourself in when you first came here. Take these little rings, sweetie. They'll look good on you."
:shipment of ebony "You did well, dumpling. Without Odral Helvi, our operations in Caldera will go so much smoother. Not to mention our relations with House Redoran."
If Crassius was not approached during the quest:
shipment of ebony "I wish you had spoken to me about this, my little pudding pie. This was out best chance to arrest Odral Helvi and now that chance is gone."
:shipment of ebony "I wish you had listened to my advice, but what's done is done. Odral knows someone's after him now. I don't think he'll have any more special favors to ask of you."
Show: Velfred the Outlaw
"I'm glad you stopped by, . I may have some business to discuss with you."
:Business "Now that you've had some experience in ebony smuggling, pudding pie, I want you to look for Velfred the Outlaw."
::Velfred the Outlaw "He's been a very naughty boy, smuggling ebony without paying House Hlaalu the proper respect. I'm sure you can turn your sweet charms on him and make him respect House Hlaalu. And if he won't listen, you know what to do. He usually docks at Hla Oad."
:::respect House Hlaalu "Yes, once you find Velfred, you'll need to convince him to show us more respect. If he gives you any trouble, don't hesitate to rough him up a little or even kill him."
After convincing Velfred to respect the Hlaalu:
"Have you found Velfred the Outlaw?"
:Velfred the Outlaw "I'm so glad you convinced him to pay us respects, dumpling. Please accept this gift of 1000 drakes."
::ash statue "You found ash statues on board the ship, dumping? I knew Velfred was a smuggler, but I had no idea he was involved in... darker things. A word of advice, my sweet, avoid these ash statues. They can be dangerous and are of little value."
::respect House Hlaalu "If anyone else needs convincing, I'll keep you in mind, dumpling."
::Velfred the Outlaw "I like your style, dumpling."
If Velfred died:
"Have you found Velfred the Outlaw?"
:Velfred the Outlaw "Oh? Velfred the Outlaw is dead? Excellent work, dumpling. Please accept my gift of 500 drakes."
Show: Kill Banden Indarys
"I'm glad you stopped by, . I may have some business to discuss with you."
:Business "House Redoran built a stronghold without a charter from the Duke. You're the perfect to teach Redoran Lord Banden Indarys a lesson."
:: "Oh? Banden Indarys is already dead? Well, then, please accept these 1000 drakes from House Hlaalu."
::Banden Indarys "House Redoran also has an unchartered stronghold. The Redoran Stronghold of Indarys Manor is on the east side of the road from Ald'ruhn to Maar Gan in a place called the Bal Isra. Go there and kill the master of the stronghold, Banden Indarys. I know you will not disapoint me, pudding."
After defeating Banden:
"Did you teach Banden Indarys his lesson? Is House Redoran fleeing from your wrath, sweetie?"
:Banden Indarys "So Indarys Manor is no more? Good work, . Please take these 1000 drakes from House Hlaalu."
::Banden Indarys "You never disappoint me, pudding pie."
Show: Bero's Support
"I'm glad you stopped by, . I may have some business to discuss with you."
:Business "It would be a good idea to win the support of another Councilman, my sweet. Of all the Councilmen, I believe only Dram Bero has the courage to support an outlander."
::Dram Bero "I am sure he will support you if you can find him and state your case. Alas, Dram Bero is very secretive and no one seems to know where he lives. Ask around Vivec, dumpling, perhaps someone can tell you."
::: "If you've already gotten his support for Hlaalu Hortator, it shouldn't be too hard to get his support on the council. Just turn your charms on him once more, pudding. He'll yield."
After finding Bero but failing to gain his support:
"Have you spoken with Dram Bero?"
:Dram Bero "It's unfortunate that you weren't able to win his support, pudding. I was so certain he'd fall for you the way I did. Well, nevermind. There is always other business."
After finding Bero and gaining his support:
"Have you spoken with Dram Bero?"
:Dram Bero "I heard that Dram Bero has pledged to support you. This will help your advancement to Councilman, dumpling."
::Dram Bero "Dram Bero will support you on the Council, but he doesn't care about you like I do."
Show: Kill Reynel Uvirith
"I'm glad you stopped by, . I may have some business to discuss with you."
:Business "The naughty Telvanni also built a stronghold without a charter. Before the Duke grants this stronghold legitimacy, I want you to deal with the Telvanni sorcerer Reynel Uvirith."
:: "If you already killed Reynel Uvirith, you are learning to anticipate my needs, dumpling. Here's 1000 drakes from House Hlaalu. Buy something pretty for Uncle Crassius."
::Reynel Uvirith "The Telvanni Stronghold of Tel Uvirith is built on Uvirith's Grave due west of Tel Fyr and northwest of the Erabenimsun camp. I'll mark these on your map. Don't be subtle, sweetie. Make sure House Telvanni gets the message."
After defeating Reynel:
"Did you find Reynel Uvirith? Is the Telvanni stronghold no longer a threat?"
:Reynel Uvirith "I heard that Reynel Uvirith was dead. I am so proud of you, dumpling. Please take another thousand drakes from House Hlaalu."
::Reynel Uvirith "There are now fewer troubles for House Hlaalu."
If approached again:
"I don't have any more business for you, dumpling, but thanks for coming to see poor, lonely Uncle Crassius."
:Business "I have no more business for you, pudding. Maybe it's time you were introduced to Duke Vedam Dren in Ebonheart."
==Quotes==
*"I'm so glad to see you again, ."
*"Well, if you are the Nerevarine, why haven't you fulfilled the prophecies? Surely you haven't forgotten. You haven't done something foolish, have you? You mustn't be shy, dumpling. I've heard that Archcanon Tholer Saryoni, the high priest of the Temple, is VERY upset, and that he is hoping that you will come speak with him at the High Fane here in Vivec City. Maybe that would be a good idea. Don't you think?"
==Bugs==
* If the Nerevarine is over level 20, Curio will still ask them why they have not defeated Dagoth Ur when they already have.
* Curio will thank the Nerevarine for killing Reynel Uvirith even if they are not a member of House Hlaalu.
==Appearances==
*
* 
* 
==References==
de:Crassius Curio
es:Crasio Curio
it:Crassius Curio
pl:Crassius Curio
ru:Крассиус Курио
Category:Morrowind: House Hlaalu Members
Category:Councilors
Category:Morrowind: Vivec Characters
Category:Morrowind: Authors
Category:Morrowind: Quest Givers
Category:Morrowind: Essential Characters