If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'

If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'
SpongeBob becomes idolized for mystic powers he does not possess.
Season: 2 Episode: 9
Total Episode Count: 16
Prod. no.: 1ACX12
Featuring: SpongeBob, Patrick
Also Appearing: Sandy, Plankton, Squidward, Pearl, Tom, Barbara, Steven C. Callaghan, Dirk Bandit, Rufus SquarePants, God, Jeremy the Terminally ill Boy, Bryant Gumbel, Greg Gumbel, Craig T. Nelson, Scott Bakula, Whoopi Goldberg, Betty White, Charlie Sheen, Mr. McCloud, Steinberg, Little Johnny Gobraun, Mr. Harris, Florida Evans, James Evans, James Evans, Sr., Pittsburgh Steelers
Plot: SpongeBob SquarePants becomes very upset when NBC cancels his favorite show - Gumbel 2 Gumbel Beach Justice - a sitcom starring brothers Braynt Gumbel and Greg Gumbel. Sandy suggests he use the series' cancellation to help Patrick improve his study habits. To get the show back on the air, SpongeBob decides to tell a Grant-A-Dream Foundation that being able to watch the show is Patick's dying wish. To this end, he makes up a disease called "tumasyphilisitisosis," the symptoms of which include growing extra nipples (pepperoni slices) across one's torso. (SpongeBob eats two of them, to the disgust of the Grant-A-Dream agent.)
An agreement is brokered between Grant-A-Dream and NBC in which Gumbel show will be put back on the air of NBC can get the film rights to Patrick's death. SpongeBob is overjoyed when Gumbel 2 Gumbel is back on the air, but he panics upon learning that mourners are holding a candlelit vigil on their front lawn. When the network comes to claim their part of the deal, Sandy finds out about the scam and tells SpongeBob to tell the truth, but he could possibly face prison time fraud. Acting out of desperation, he casually claims to have cured him and gets off the hook. Thus SpongeBob gets a reputation for being a healer, the people start worshiping him as a god. Infuriated, the real God sends six plagues upon his house. When Patrick is crushed by a giant golden statue of spongeBob during the final plague (death of the first-roomed boy), SpongeBob admits that he is not God, thus ending the plagues and saving Patrick's life. He then, in the final moments, foolishly attempts to say he is god again but stops the moment the plagues return.
==Cutaways==
#Craig T. Nelson
#The Diary of Anne Frank
#Hollywood Squares
#Black to the Future
==Trivia==
*None
==Reception==
In his 2008 review, Ahsan Haque of IGN, rating the episode a 7.9/10, said that while "If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin" is "worth watching" it "isn't as entertaining" as most episodes in season 2. He called the Gumbel 2 Gumbel sequence the highlight of the episode.
==Rating==
TV-14: D
==Gallery==
SjsD,jsL.png|French title card
Wwsin,wwi.png|Japanese title card
Smem,mem.png|Spanish title card
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Category:List of Family Sponge Episodes
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