Everyone Goes to LOCCENT

The Shatterdome staff be on everything, including, but most certainly not limited to, he father of Andrea's child(ren) (she probably tells people they're twins by virtue of there being no secrets in the Shatterdome), when Jackson will realize he loves Chuck Darling, how Indiana Darling fails to set sail during a given encounter (will Chuck wither Jackson on the spot or will he fuck things up and, if so, how?), and who will win in a fight. 
==Records==
* Most Rangers flattened by a non-Ranger (Pietr Vos ("Squire"))
* Most coffee drunk in a day (Pietr Vos (Sydney; "Squire"), Tendo Choi (Anchorage))
* Most hugs given to a stranger by an adult (Pietr Vos ("Squire"))
* First Ranger-type Chuck Darling didn't try to destroy within 24 hours of their acquaintance (Pietr Vos ("Squire"); formerly held by the Moya twins)
** Although Caitlin Lightcap and Cadet Darling were in the same place at the same time before their formal introduction, Doctor Lightcap tended to forget/overlook Darling's presence in favour of "omg triplet brains!" or Darling was in a coma. Upon awakening and midway through their formal introduction, Darling panicked and needed restraining; in the process, she bit Lightcap's arm with quite a bit of force.
* First 'civilian' Rangers to come up with an entirely new word for a language: Pietr Vos and Chuck Hansen, ::Striker Eureka:: (Closed fist mid-chest, downward sweep, opening to a flattened hand, palm in, just like Striker's sting blades; "Ours")
==Misc==
* What colour powder Logan Jones will sneeze next ("Aye, Aye, AGNIS")
** The hair-splitting over exactly /what colour gets to the point at which GLITTER and central monitoring get involved to take colour samples from screencaps. People need to be bang on with the hex code or they gets no winnings. #Shatterdome Staff abuse of PPDC technology
* As to whether Chuck Hansen will find a willing copilot (Between Thomas Nguyen and Stacker Pentecost; "Friendly Wager")
==Ships==
===Indiana Darling===
* the gender of their potential offspring (Indiana Darling)
* when will Jackson realize he loves Chuck ('napped)
* how Jackson proposes
* what will destroy all hope of the ship setting sail
===Jandreon===
* who fathered Andrea's ikums
* Will Jason show up in Medical today?
** Was it Max or sex?
*** If it was sex, was it because of actually attempting something sexy or did he make some sort of sexy comment in Logan's presence and is now paying the price? 
== Chuck Hansen's Birthday ==
Notice to Staff: 
Due to tension between PPDC employees and Ranger Hansen (the youngest), Hide-and-Seek is cancelled. 
To the employees who made financial commitments as to the reaction of Ranger Hansen (the youngest), please see below.  
To the PPDC employees who made a financial commitment as to groundspeed, augment volume, or blood pressure during the events of Ranger Hansen (the youngest)’s birthday:
[1] Doctor Olatunji (Assistant chief of KSci, J-Tech division) has kindly provided rates of acceleration and deceleration for the Rangers Hansen.
[2]: LOCCENT have posted a decibel graph of the debacle for those employees who estimated the argument’s pitch extremes.
[3]: Medical have offered their estimations on the Rangers Hansen’s blood pressures for those employees who cared to make a guess.
Please also note I am somewhat concerned that this is how one would choose to alleviate their boredom.
For those who made less specific financial commitments and/or have an interest in the proceedings, the results are as follows:
Ranger Hansen (the youngest) covered the distance between the conference room and the hangar in seven minutes (as opposed to the usually ten), most likely due to the lack of traffic in the halls. He reached Bay 30 in another two and a half minutes[1] (as opposed to the usual three), most likely due to mess of paint on Striker Eureka visible from across hangar, and realized the implication of what was done to Striker Eureka in one minute eighteen seconds.
Ranger Hansen (the younger) arrived in the hangar after a walk of ten minutes, reached the foot of Striker Eureka in two minutes[1], and assessed the situation in less than five seconds.
Ranger Hansen (the youngest) proceeded to make a fuss about the state of Striker Eureka for half an hour[2, 3]. Ranger Hansen (the younger) intervened after the first bellow but to no avail, and offered four more attempts to calm down his son before he, too, lost his temper[2, 3].
An informal poll from those exiting the hangar during this tirade revealed the situation to be funny, on average, for the first four minutes at which point it became “annoying”, “embarrassing”, and “for the love of Heaven, just get over yourself”.
Furthermore, Ranger Wei Jin will remain on the clothesline until further notice, regardless of whether he has dried off or continues his off-key interpretations of as many Disney songs as he can remember.
Best regards, 
Xiong Li-hua
==Fei Yen's Spit Ups==
Xiong eases Fei Yen from the arms of her latest victim--
In her peripheral, money changes hands. 
She queries. 
"Dry cleaning?"
"Is offered on site." 
""Hey, Tse! The pool cashed out! You won--"" 
"Won what?"
"A blender?"
"Because?"
"The most adorable of all infants bestowed the contents of her squishy tummy upon the hapless individual Tse predicted she would?"
"You lot are betting on whom my daughter will spit up?"
"Yes?" 
"Anything else I should know about?" 
==Logan's Breakable Glasses==
"And Cadet Jones needs his prescription renewed." 
"Got it--/how? He came in for a gym injury? He doesn't even wear his glasses there!"
The nurse shrugs, 'don't look at me!'
== The Joneses' Boo-boos ==
Some of Team Striker Eureka used to have a betting pool on what sort of mundane, extremely minor injury would finally kill the Joneses (seeing as Kaiju, The Kaidanovskys, and Australia had completely failed). The leading candidate was a papercut.
Jackson: >cuts self on manual< Ah, fuck! Paper cut!
Striker techs: >peer out from all corners like in that twix ad<
==Sleep Slinging==
"Yeung's sleep coffee slinging again."
"/Fuck." Smacks a crab down on the table. "Does she /ever wake up?"
Category:Ficlet
Category:Scraps
Category:Shatterdome staff bet on everything