Merlin the Wizard

Merlin the wizard is a deceased member of the RUC.
== History ==
He was a simple wizard who was minding his own business, nothing much there. Then Popeye came along and like the insane piece of shit that he is, he claims that he needs Merlin's help to stop the evil "Mr. Jap". Merlin refused, but Popeye assumed he agreed and dragged him to meet up with Jafar and Count Chocula before beginning the chase against "Mr. Jap" in the event that would be known as Bloody Sunday.
== Bio ==
Merlin was a wizard who wanted to live a simple life, but his forced inclusion into the klan prevented him from doing that. After Popeye recruited many more members for the klan, he was neglected and often abused by the members, even though the RUC claims they got along. Merlin started speaking in rhymes due to the mental damage caused by his abuse.
== Death ==
Oh, this is a good one. Merlin eventually died from old age, but the RUC claims that Bern set him on fire and killed him, because they want to blame everything on Bern or Mike or anyone related to Mike. The RUC pretended to care about the fact that he died, even though they were godawful to him before. Jabberjaw said that he loved Merlin like a brother... except he ate his breakfast, lunch, and dinner every single day, and didn't care about the fact that he was starving. Popeye gave a heartfelt speech about Merlin, and though one may believe he really did care about Merlin at first, he seemed to have forgotten completely about Merlin afterwards. The speech is presumed to mainly have been written to make the RUC look like good people and to demonize and blame Bern or Mike or the streams or blah blah blah for everything horrible.
Category:Members
Category:Radioactive Uber Clan
Category:Victims
Category:Deceased
Category:Low Priority Article