KrabGate

KrabGate is the second episode of The SpongeBob and Papa Tarrant Show. The episode was aired on June 17th, 2024, and was written by KMJ.
== Transcript ==
[The episode begins with SpongeBob making krabby patties and serving them to customers. After that, we see Mr. Krabs counting all of his money.]
Mr. Krabs: eight hundred thousand nine hundred ninety-eight... eight hundred thousand nine hundred ninety-nine... eight hundred one th-
Squidward: Mr. Krabs! We have bad news!
Mr. Krabs: Now its not the time, mister Squidward!
Squidward: But this is serious!
Mr. Krabs: I only listen to serious serious news....
Squidward: It's triple than that!
Mr. Krabs: WHAAAAAT?! Tell me quick!
Squidward: Look at the news article, Mr. Krabs
Mr. Krabs: Eh, im not a fond reader, but ill read the article if its THAT THAT SERIOUS
[Mr. Krabs reads the article, with his expression changing from curious to fear, just like this scene]
Mr. Krabs: KRABGATE?! SEX RING?! PEDOPHILIA?! IN MY OWN PLACE?! ME??!. That's bullshit! I would never do that! Im not a pedo!
Squidward: That's the case Mr. Krabs! They're trying to cancel you, deplatform you, dethrone you, bankrupt you, defame you and JAIL YOU... and YOU WILL LOSE YOUR BUSINESS AND ALL OF YOUR MONEY!
Mr. Krabs: AUUGH!!!!!! That's it! I have to do something about it!
[Mr. Krabs opens his mic, types it repeatedly to send attention, and starts speaking to the mic, which the sound of the speaking from the mic is heard from the speakers at the ceiling top]
Mr Krabs [SPEAKER]: DEAR EVERYONE AT THE MR. KRABS, THE RESTRUANT IS CURRENTLY IN EMERGENCY. WE DEMAND ALL CUSTOMERS TO EXIT THE AREA IMMEDIATELY, WHILST THE WORKERS SHALL STAY THERE
[All customers leave the Krusty Krabs, while Squidward and SpongeBob stay inside the Krusty Krabs]
SpongeBob: W-What's happening?!
Mr. Krabs: We will discuss everything in my office
SpongeBob: Alrightey!
[The scene then cuts to Mr. Krabs office, with SpongeBob and Squidward sitting at the desk with Mr. Krabs]
Mr. Krabs: Alright, so, there is an active conspiracy theory where people believe that i lead a pedophilia sex ring in the Krusty Krabs and that other Democratic Party members and politicians participated in the ring
SpongeBob: That reminds me of the Pizzagate!
Squidward: Exactly! They're trying to demonize Mr. Krabs, SpongeBob!
[SpongeBob gasps in fear]
Mr. Krabs: Now, what i've known is that it wasn't Plankton, because his plans are to steal the secret formula, of course, but the people who made up the conspiracy theories are white supremacists, democrats and other right-wing politcal groups.
SpongeBob: Wait... so why exactly did the democrats added the Democratic Party to the conspiracy?
Squidward: Controlled opposition, SpongeBob, the Democratic and Republican party are just like puppet shows made by the goverment
Mr. Krabs: Isn't this also a conspiracy theory?
Squidward: No... but there are many evidence that the Democratic and Republican parties are controlled to fight eachother to garner votes as a data-garner
SpongeBob: Werid... but what were we talking about before!
Mr. Krabs: Oh yes! Krabgate! That conspiracy shit! Our plan is to stop the spread of this nasty conspiracy theory and we need to stop the people who made them!
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Mr. Krabs: Now- wait, i just got a message from Patrick Star.... and it says.... "Cout your days, pedo..."
SpongeBob: PATRICK?!
Squidward: Ooooh noooo! Patrick's idiot mind believed the conspiracy with lacking evidence and joined their side!
Mr. Krabs: We have to do something! Quick!
Squidward: Aight! I will write a news article about debunking the Krabgate conspiracy!
SpongeBob: Okay... ill try to erase everything just to make sure that the conspiracy gets forgotten!
Mr. Krabs: Good idea both! Now... do your jobs while i put the Krusty Krabs on immediate lockdown
SpongeBob and Squidward: Okay!
French Narrator: 10 seconds later
SpongeBob: Yhep Squidward... the Krusty Krabs is filled with propoganda posters
[exterior shot of Krusty Krabs filled with krabgate propoganda posters]
SpongeBob: But don't worry! Ill fix it!
[SpongeBob tears down propoganda posters quicker than a leopard. The Krusty Krabs is now squeaky clean and poster-free]
SpongeBob: Here we go! What about you Squidward? Did you publish the news article
Squidward: I published it after you cleaned the Krusty Krabs
SpongeBob: You must be a faster fella than i
Squidward: Wait.... there's a comment by Patrick and it says "That's horrible! We should never demonize Krabs like THAT!". What a fucking cornball, he's become stupider than that time he confused piss with apple juice...
SpongeBob: Don't call him like that! His brain isn't probably functioning properly... or that he forgot to take his pills....
Squidward: He is not Joe Biden!
SpongeBob: Im just saying!
Squidward: Wait! I just got something again... and its a news article saying "Right-Wing Democrats are planning to start an anti-Krabs parade in Bikini Bottom road"!
SpongeBob: Oh these rascals! We need to do something....
[They both brainstorm ideas. Until SpongeBob gets an idea]
SpongeBob: I got an idea!
[SpongeBob whispers to Squidward about the plan]
Squidward: That's an incredible idea!
SpongeBob: Indeed! But we need to plan things up! Let's go to my house
Squidward: Okay
[SpongeBob and Squidward go to SpongeBob's pineapple house. Squidward, Papa Tarrant, The Garries and John Podesta (because he experienced with conspiracy attacks) are sitting in their chairs, while SpongeBob tells them everything about the plan]
SpongeBob: Alright! Let's start! So the parade, hosted by Democrats and others, will take place on Bikini Bottom Road at 4 AM. Our plan will start earlier, before the parade. The plan is to buy a bulldozer from Chuck's Motors and arm it with bulletproof material and explosion-proof plates. After we finish arming the bulldozer, we will park it in the sand before 4 AM, prior to the parade. When the parade begins, we will emerge from the sand, shoot our pistols into the air, and throw bang snaps at the Democrats.
Gary Junior: But how are we able to obtain guns, if there are rarely any in Bikini Bottom
Papa Tarrant: I have 4 pistols meant for the sports
Gary Junior: okay
SpongeBob: Any questions?
[No one raises a hand]
SpongeBob: Sweet! Let's start the cooking!
[Montage showing SpongeBob, Squidward, Garries, Papa Tarrant and Podesta buying the bulldozer, highly modifying the bulldozer by placing defensive material and plates and making homemade bang snaps. While Voicemail by SEMTEXNOKIA plays in the background]
SpongeBob: Aaannd here we go!
Everyone: Woaaah...
[Highly detailed shot of the bulldozer with clean effect and angelic choir in the background]
SpongeBob: Alright! No that out of the way, lets drive this BEAST!
[The group hops onto the bulldozer and drive it to Bikini Bottom and park it in the sands]
SpongeBob: Now lets wait!
French Narrator: 1 hour later
[The Gang sleeps, while SpongeBob watches the road, doozy and sleepy]
SpongeBob: *yawn* time to sle.... wait a minute.... GANG! WAKE UP!
[Everyone wakes up]
Everyone: Huh?!
SpongeBob: They're coming! Be ready!
[The gang brings their weapons, while SpongeBob continues to sightseek. Suddenly, the parade happens, with democratic protesters, white supremacists, right-wingers and other political groups storm the road waving anti-Krabs flags and Democrat Bikini Bottom flags, while chanting "In the streets we stand and shout, With our voices, loud and stout, "Krabsgate lies, the truth we seek, Down with power, down with greed!".]
SpongeBob: Let's waste no time and let the party start!
[SpongeBob and the Gang drive up to the road and start shooting pistol at the sky, causing the protesters to be scared and go away, but some of them don't leave. The gang starts throwing bang snaps, causing small, but fearmongering explosions on the road. Some of the protesters, instead of accepting defeat, decide to attack the bulldozer with molotovs and guns, but the bulldozer gets damaged a little. The bulldozer accidentally runs over 12 attacking protesters, with 2 of them getting their legs crushed. One of the protesters manages to climb up the bulldozer and tries to attack Gary Junior, but Gary Junior in an act of self-defense, shoots the protester 3 times in the chest and running him over. SpongeBob and the gang drive away from the road to SpongeBob's house, and quickly hide the bulldozer in SpongeBob's garage, leaving no traces of the bulldozer in SpongeBob's house]
SpongeBob: This isn't how i imagined my plan!
Gary Junior: It's not MY problem he tried to attack me! I had no time!
Papa Tarrant: Yeah... atleast we tried to silence them....
Everyone: Yeah.....
SpongeBob: Anyways, bye Squidward, bye Podesta, bye Squidward~
Gary Junioe: you said Squidward twice
SpongeBob: I like Squidward~. Anyways, its time for me to sleep. Goodnight!
Everyone: Goodnight!
[SpongeBob, Papa Tarrant and the Garries sleep, which marks the end of the show]
[The credits show a message saying:
"We do NOT encourage people to take action in a protest by using weaponry nor using armed vehicles. This episode is just a fictional goof*
[The End]
Category:2024
Category:2024 Episodes
Category:2024 Transcripts
Category:Episode transcripts
Category:Episodes
Category:KMJ
Category:KMJ Studios
Category:The Spongebob and Papa Tarrant Show