The Goddamn 1st Anniversary Fic (Gone Horribly Wrong)

==Story 1: Everybody Dies At The End (a parody/satire of your average kill em all Rayven fic. I'm going to satire every type of your fics. )==
==Chapter 1: Phazon Dies ==
As Phazon left his computer, he was thinking of this BIG DAMN IDEA for a 1st anniversary of his wiki. It would take a few months, but hell if he cared.
Anyway, he didn't know, but there was this killer out there... and he/she/LIQUOR was going to go and kill every character in this story, which you should probably know by reading da title). 
After that, the killer asked some guy on the internet where Phazon's adress was. And so, he/she/LIQUOR travelled to Phazon's house.
And then he/she/LIQUOR threw him into his van. And when they got to he/she/LIQUOR'S home Phazon had a hanging.
==Chapter 2: GTF Dies==
And then the killer ran around to find GTF.
It turns out that GTF already died. Well that explains something. So then he/she/LIQUOR went home and watched some Cowboy Bebop while thinking of a plan to kill.... me?
==Chapter 3: The Author Dies==
(listen to this badass music while reading this chapter, in fact, listen to it for the entire story)
So he/she/LIQUOR went to the author's house and then I went "Holy hell, if you're going to kill me, how will we do the next chapters!". He/she/LIQUOR had no concern because she's writing the story after this chapter.
Bye
Chapter 4: Sublime Has A Sick Mind (a.k.a Sublime Dies Part One)
AT LAST! I NOW HAVE CONTROL OF YOU COMPUTER! 
Well, I may as well tell what happens after this. I went straight to Mr Pies house, and since he's reading this fic already, he ran away, because he knows he's next.
As he was running away, I captured him and left him in my basement.
==Chapter 5: Sublime STILL Has A Sick Mind (a.k.a Sublime Dies Part 2)==
I then made him watch my entire life record by shrinking him and putting him in a jar.
And he couldn't hold it through and died after 1 hour. Mary sues unite!
==Chapter 6: Rayven Presumably Dies==
Next, I went over to Rayven's house and taped her to a tree. I may skip all the gory details, because we need to keep this PG. But I honestly don't know if she's dead or not...
==Chapter 7: Rainbowz Is Too Much Of A Homestuck Fan (Rainbowz Sort Of Dies Part 1)==
So, I went over to RainbowDerp's house (or Rainbowz's house, whatever) and guess what? She was reading bloody Homestuck for 30 hours straight!
I needed her to snap out of it so I could kill her, but she's just too much of a Homestuck fan.
==Chapter 8: Rainbowz Is STILL Too Much Of A Homestuck Fan (Rainbowz Sort Of Dies Part 2)==
So, I decided to read some of this Homestuck, and it's actually pretty interesting. But back to the story, I didn't need to kill Rainbowz because she'd probably die by running out of food and water.
I have no idea if she died or not, but I guess she sort of died.
==Chapter 9: Masked Dies==
So, it was a risk going to Masked's house considering he's friends with The Rake.
And he could probably kill me, but hell if I cared. I went over to his house and lifted his mask off... And then that was a bad idea, because I nearly got killed by him, but I won the fight because i'm a Mary Sue.
==Chapter 10: This Probably Wont Be Completed, But Hell If I Care (Part One)==
Back at home, I sat down and watched more Cowboy Bebop.
Ugh, why did I do that...
Well, I should probably reveal myself.
==Chapter 11: So.. Who Was The Killer? (Part Two)==
I'm RAYVEN LIQUOR AMERICAN.
Yep, Rayven's evil twin. 
WOW, WHAT A GENERIC PLOT TWIST! But hell, I don't care if it's generic, all I care about is the story being over! Shoo shoo, go away, dammit!