The Blue and the Gray/Quotes

:(Marge is at the shop with her gray hair. She is standing in line, and Ralph comes up to her as she leaves.)
:Ralph: Grandma had hair like that when she went to sleep in her forever box.
----
:Dr. Kissingher: If you're watching this, your love life is like Sister Act 3 - no Whoopi.
----
:Marge: My first gray hair!
:Homer: Oh, Marge. Don't worry. Lots of movie stars have gray hair, like all those women we loved in the eighties.
:Marge: Oh, Homer. You always mean to say the nicest things.
:Homer: Well, it's not easy with you talking all the time.
----
:Moe: I'm Moe Szyslak. Growing up, I had roundworm. Heck I was more worm than man some months. I dabbled in satanism until I was asked to leave. Oh and one month I ate nothing by aquarium fish.
----
:Bart: I just have one question about hair: where does mine start? Head, head, head... hair? Where's the border?
:Lisa: Oh, my God! Me too!
:(Maggie feels her hair and looks worried)
:Bart: What are we?
----
:J. Loren Pryor:: Remember, Bart, anything you say here is confidential.
:Bart: Can we close the door?
:J. Loren Pryor: Oh, there is no door. State regulations.
:Sherri/Terri: Hey Bart!
:Sherri/Terri (other twin): Still freaking out 'cause your mom aged 30 years in a day?
:J. Loren Pryor: Don't judge them too harshly. They recently learned they were once two-thirds of conjoined triplets. And the third one is out for revenge.
----
:Marge: (to Patty and Selma) You guys went gray yourselves.
:Selma: No we didn't, this is just smoke and ash. (Patty and Selma rub the "smoke and ash" from their hair, which goes out the window and causes a plane to crash)
----
:Homer: What has she done!? It's like I'm married to Richard Gere.
:(Phone rings)
:Homer: Not now, phone. I'm talking to myself. It's okay, Homer. It's just a couple of minutes. Thanks, Homer.
:(Picks up phone)
:Homer: Hello?
:Moe: Hello, wingman? You were supposed to be here two minutes ago.
:Homer: Oh, thank you, prior commitment! (kisses receiver and hangs up)
----
:Milhouse: Bart, what happened to your mom's hair? Did she see something scary like the vampire on Sesame Street? They should warn you when he's coming.
----
:Moe: I love Valentines Day. Just mix a couple of drops of Jagermeister with some pink lemonade, add some cherry chapstick, call it Cupid's Ambrosia and charge it up the wazoo.
----
:Moe: Excuse me, is this the seminar where you learn how to free escorts?
:Superintendent Chalmers: Well, we're certainly not here to learn how to fold napkins.
:Ned Flanders: Looks like I came in here for nothing.
----
:Dr. Kissingher: Your only hope is to get a wingman.
:Moe: What's a wingman?
:Dr. Kissingher: A wingman is a friend who...
:Moe: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Now I gotta get a friend?
----
:Homer: Marge, you have nothing to worry about. I'm a wingman, a proud tradition that includes Iceman from "Top Gun", Wedge Antilles from "Star Wars", and me from now.
----
:Mr. Burns: Now which of you wants to be the sliced haddock in a geezer sandwich?
es:The Blue and the Gray/Frases
Category:Quotes