News Machine, December 2020

The Residents' News Machine is an official news blog dedicated to the activities of The Residents, which has been active at the group's official website since January 13th 2017.
This page collects posts made to this blog in December 2020, as archived on archive.org.
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== Blog entries ==
=== THE WORST IDEA I EVER HAD! ===
Thursday, December 17 2020, 7:38am
UPDATE: ALL COPIES HAVE BEEN SOLD!
Homer Flynn, Captain Doc of The Cryptic Corporation here. Back in the late 1970s, I had the idea of creating what I planned to be a fantastic series of collectible Residents' boxsets. The sets would be based on The Third Reich'n Roll, Fingerprince and Eskimo albums and each would come in a hand made wooden box. The Third RnR was to be the first, so I hired a woodworker to make two hundred boxes, then we silkscreen printed the covers. The set was to be enclosed in a bag made from a section of Christo's famous fence and contain work from several well known artists, but as they say, the best known plans...
Years passed as every step of the process became overly complicated and time consuming, with the final blow being a trip to the emergency room with a massive headache I contracted while spray painting the boxes with glossy black car enamel. Buried inside a pair of heavy coveralls, wearing gloves and underneath a respirator mask with my head throbbing, I became increasingly confused and disoriented, until, nearly unconscious, my helper shoved me into his truck and hurried me off to the hospital, where they discovered a rubber band that I had wrapped tightly around my head in order to keep the hair out my eyes. Relieved of this demonic and constrictive device, I quickly recovered, but my desire to create AMAZING BOX SETS vanished along with the rubber band.
But since we had actually pre-sold several sets, we had to complete a limited number, so twenty-five, along with five artist proofs, were eventually made. I even have one. The next set was to be Eskimo, which was intended to be a fur covered box containing two white vinyl records, with grooves on one side of the discs and fur on the other. Somewhere back in my fur covered memory, I have the vague recollection that a few of those were actually made but my enthusiasm had long since vanished, so I can't say with certainty if that actually happened or not.
As for the Fingerprince boxset, it completely vanished in the mist of time, until now... Forty years after bailing on part three of the Worst Idea I Ever Had, Residents' fan and collector par-excellence, Jannis Tsakalis, as a total labor of love, has taken it upon himself to complete the Horrible Idea Trilogy by creating the Fingerprince boxset, rechristening it with the project's original name, Tourniquet of Roses.
And now it can be yours.
Tourniquet of Roses is a limited edition of fifteen - only fourteen will be sold. AND ALL FOURTEEN HAVE BEEN SOLD!
== See also ==
* News Machine
* Residents.com
* BOG
== External links and references ==
*The Residents' News Machine, archived January 2nd 2021 by archive.org
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