Headhunters 3: The Hateful Eight

== Introduction ==
Down goes Balls! Down goes Balls! 
==In Memorium: I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls==
Perhaps the greatest upset in the history of HEADHUNTERS. No team has ever been eliminated this early in the season with a weekly average score over 190 points. Dere-lick averaged 194 points per game. So what went wrong for the top-scoring team in the league? 
Russell Wilson's finger injury kept him out for several weeks, but you'd be excused for thinking that he still hasn't returned. Despite a mighty roster, Dere-lick never really got it together at the QB position. He started Wilson 6 times and Carson Wentz the other 5. This week it was Wilson with a disappointing 15.93. 
At WR, it was a top to bottom letdown for Dere-lick. CeeDee Lamb exited with a concussion. Harris below projection. Davis below projection. Kirk below projection. Cooper Kupp on the bye. Hollywood Brown out. Utter disaster. 
With RB, starting Zeke Elliot AND Tony Pollard because Darrell Henderson was on the bye might not have been the best move. Pollard outscored Zeke but both underwhelmed. Meanwhile, Freeman beat projection on the bench.
And of course, the TEs were never anything to write home about. Conklin and Henry, TD dependents, neither got in for a score. 
So pretty much a complete collapse for Dere-lick after losing Derrick Henry. It was a promising season, but running out of money so early and not having waiver priority over anyone eventually doomed this team.
Dere-lick: 
==Weeks Survived (2019 v 2020 v 2021)==
Weeks Survived (2019 v 2020 v 2021)
Team 	2021 Finish	2020 Finish	2019 Finish
Pats a bitch 	20th (-1) 	19th 	N/A
It's Blitz! Track 2 	19th (-16) 	3rd (-2) 	1st
Shotti's Bugatti 	18th (-5) 	13th 	N/A
Hasta Laviska Baby 	17th (-7) 	10th (+2) 	12th
Ya Hate 2 See It 	16th (-7) 	9th (+7) 	16th
Mixon Beer with Liquor 	15th (-14) 	1st (+16) 	17th
CP 	14th (-8) 	6th (-4) 	2nd
The Guilloteam 	13th (-6) 	7th (-4)) 	3rd
Henry VIII 	12th (-1) 	11th (-1) 	10th
Last Coach Standing 	11th (-9) 	2nd 	N/A
I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls	10th (+6) 	16th (-11) 	5th
Ranking-wise, a good follow-up season to Keeling's disappointing 2020 campaign, but you cannot help feeling like this team had championship potential...
==Dead Money==
Keeping track of all the cash that never got spent by teams that are now eliminated.
Dead Money
Dead Money	% of Total Eliminated Cash
$6,016 	55%
==Week Twelve - The Great Purge==
This is the latest we will ever have a double-elimination! Week 12 will be a double and then we will go single (as long as I did the math right) until we have crowned a champion. 
==New Releases==
How much is too much for Cooper Kupp?
#Cooper Kupp
#Ezekiel Elliot
#CeeDee Lamb
#Hollywood Brown
#Darrell Henderson
AJ Brown is also available via auction from Bad VRs. The bid must be $69 or higher or he will revert back to Bad VRs, and he will clear waivers in the morning along with all the other new releases.
==Week Eleven Bidding Results==
Week Eleven Bidding Results
Player 	Winning Team 	Winning Bid	Next Highest Bid
D'Andre Swift 	Sloppy Seconds 	$256 	$202 (Bad VRs)
Justin Jefferson 	Sloppy Seconds 	$187 	$154 (Bad VRs)
George Kittle 	Sloppy Seconds 	$122 	$71 (Return of the Mac)
David Montgomery 	Return of the Mac	$105 	$105/Lower Waiver Priority (Bad VRs)
Antonio Gibson 	Bad VRs 	$99 	$92 (RemDawg Forever)
Damien Harris 	RemDawg Forever 	$92 	$21 (Beach McBungalow)
Diontae Johnson 	Return of the Mac	$89 	$15 (Bad VRs)
Aaron Jones 	Bad VRs 	$55 	$41 (Return of the Mac)
Melvin Gordon III 	Beach McBungalow 	$51 	$11 (Return of the Mac)
Mike Williams 	Return of the Mac	$17 	$5 (Bad VRs)
Brandin Cooks 	Return of the Mac	$17 	$0 (Bad VRs)
Calvin Ridley 	Bad VRs 	$12 	N/A
Dallas Goedert 	Return of the Mac	$11 	N/A
Los Angeles Rams Defense 	Return of the Mac	$5 	N/A
Zach Ertz 	Out of luck 	$2 	N/A
Los Angeles Chargers Defense	Beach McBungalow 	$1 	N/A
====Quick-hit thoughts====
*The biggest winner of this week was The Titanic. Lamar's illness aside, Titanic acquired Jackson, Hurts, Hockenson, Thielen and Toney for free. It was a surefire signal that we are late enough in the season where dropping triple digits on guys might not be worth it when there is so much available for free. 
*Bad VRs grabbed some flyers in Ridley and Jones. While neither has a solid return date, Bad VRs and their extra cash puts them in the perfect position to nab these guys. If Ridley comes back, VRs spent pennies for a bonafide WR1. If he doesn't, there's very little harm done. Jones, meanwhile, will come back, making him a cheap grab. 
*Overpayment of the week goes to RemDaw, bidding 70 over necessary for Damien Harris. You have to wonder if Commish got in their head a little bit...
*
Last Year's most expensive week ten player: Ezekiel Elliot ($69...nice)
==Money Spent Per Week==
Money Spent Per Week
Week	Budget Spent 	Budget Spent (2020)	Budget Spent (2019)
2 	$9 (2 Players) 	$1173 (12 Players) 	$1339 (7 Players)
3 	$1283 (10 Players)	$1033 (7 Players) 	$1902 (15 Players)
4 	$657 (8 Players) 	$1182 (11 Players) 	$1614 (11 Players)
5 	$1376 (11 Players)	$181 (4 Players) 	1743 (14 Players)
6 	$1231 (10 Players)	$1542 (10 Players) 	$1018 (11 Players)
7 	$965 (10 Players) 	$1494 (13 Players) 	$1036 (9 Players)
8 	$2159 (15 Players)	$1938 (17 Players) 	$630 (7 Players)
9 	$1059 (12 Players)	$1454 (12 Players) 	$624 (6 Players)
10 	$1393 (9 Players) 	$712 (6 Players) 	$386 (8 Players)
11 	$1121 (16 Players)	$777 (8 Players) 	$176 (6 Players)
==Week Eleven Results==
Week Eleven Results
Finish (Last Week)	Player 	Total Points
1(4) 	The Titanic 	246.55
2(8) 	Sloppy Seconds 	238.68
3(2) 	Out of Luck 	217.00
4(1) 	Bad VRs 	216.85
5(6) 	Beach McBungalow 	194.14
6(9) 	Neck-Fix and Chill 	183.44
7(5) 	Return of the Mac 	174.98
8(7) 	RemDawg Forever 	133.03
9(3) 	I Can Dere-lick My Own balls	109.68
10 	Last Matts Stanging 	0
11 	Henry VIII 	0
12 	The Guilloteam 	0
13 	CP 	0
14 	Mixon Beer with Liquor 	0
15 	Ya Hate 2 See It 	0
16 	Hasta Laviska Baby 	0
17 	Shotti's Bugatti 	0
18 	It's Blitz! Track 2 	0
19 	Bad Boys 	0
20 	Pats a bitch 	0
*
==2021 Draft Dodgers==
Team Results Based on Draft Position
Draft Pick	Team 	Week Eliminated
1 	Beach McBungalow 	ALIVE
2 	Return of the Mac 	ALIVE
3 	I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls 	11
4 	Bad Boys 	MERGED
5 	Pats a Bitch (Steve Blackman's Nun)	2
6 	Neck-Fix and Chill 	ALIVE
7 	Henry VIII 	10
8 	Hasta Laviska Baby 	6
9 	Ya Hate 2 See It 	7
10 	Out of Luck 	ALIVE
11 	Soul Survivor 	MERGED
12 	@FFDraftScott 	ALIVE
13 	Shotti's Bugatti 	5
14 	Last Coach Standing 	10
15 	Bobecue Chicken (Sloppy Seconds) 	ALIVE
16 	It's Blitz! Track 2 	4
17 	The Guilloteam 	10
18 	Who the Fuck are all of you? 	ALIVE
19 	Mixon Beer with Liquor 	8
20 	CP 	9
==Kings of the Castle==
===1. The Titanic===
Their season is nothing short of a triumph, going from bottom dweller to a team that bid all their money early to now practically being back in the driver's seat with the top-scoring remaining team and $122 left to spend. This is by far their best campaign yet in Headhunters and they are proving that, given enough time, they can hang with the best of us. 
===2. Sloppy Seconds===
Bobecue received his call to action this week and bid a ton of money, the results being his best performance of the year and a current league-leading projection of 228.82 for week 12.
===3. Out of Luck===
Everyone knows how much Papa loves Zach Ertz, so being able to pick him up on the cheap and having him provide such a bump at the TE position was a dream come true right before Thanksgiving! Of course, now Ertz is on the bye and they'll need to go back to the well for another drink.
===4. Bad VRs===
The scariest week for Bad VRs arrives: the Kansas City bye. Look for a lot of action this week as they attempt to survive the final double-elimination of the season.
==On the Chopping Block==
===5. Beach McBungalow===
They have officially beaten Pat. 
===6. Neck-Fix and Chill===
Stil here, somehow!
===7. Return of the Mac===
More than half their budget left. Shit's about to get real.
===8. RemDawg Forever===
Thought they were going home because they didn't realize it was only single elimination. Now, with a new lease on life and $0 to their name, we'll see if they can use their waiver priority and channel The Titanic in week 12's bidding wars. 
==Average Scores of Eliminated Teams==
Average Scores of Eliminated Teams
Team 	Average Score	Weeks Played
I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls	194.02 	11
The Guilloteam 	174.95 	10
CP 	167.71 	7
Ya Hate 2 See It 	165.83 	7
Hasta Laviska Baby 	165.26 	6
Shotti's Bugatti 	153.62 	5
Last Coach Standing 	148.37 	10
Mixon Beer with Liquor 	147.76 	8
Henry VIII 	147.32 	10
Pats a bitch 	147.32 	2
It's Blitz! Track 2 	136.14 	4
 
==Narrow Defeats==
Margin of Defeat for Last Place Teams:
Margin of Defeat for Eliminated Teams
Team 	Margin of Defeat	Week Eliminated
Ya Hate 2 See It 	0.96 	7
It's Blitz! Track 2 	7.06 	4
Last Coach Standing 	8.80 	10
Henry VIII 	8.80 	10
The Guilloteam 	11.17 	10
CP 	12.12 	9
Shotti's Bugatti 	14.37 	5
Mixon Beer with Liquor 	20.81 	8
Hasta Laviska Baby 	23.24 	6
I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls	23.35 	11
Pats a bitch 	N/A 	2
==Rulers of the Kingdom==
2021 first place finishers:
Top Scorers by Week
Week	Team 	Score
1 	Return of the Mac 	208.47
2 	I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls 	249.61
3 	RemDawg Forever 	215.73
4 	Hasta Laviska Baby 	235.97
5 	The Titanic 	264.33
6 	I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls (2)	239.21
7 	Bad VRs 	228.07
8 	Bad VRs (2) 	212.18
9 	I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls (3)	203.79
10 	Bad VRs (3) 	206.74
11 	The Titanic (2) 	246.55
==Dungeon Dwellers==
2021 teams that finished second-to-last, narrowly avoiding elimination:
Low Scorers by Week
Week	Team 	Score
1 	Bobecue Chicken 	132.96
2 	Mixon Beer with Liquor	118.90
3 	Return of the Mac 	120.63
4 	Shotti's Bugatti 	125.79
5 	The Guilloteam 	132.43
6 	Out of Luck 	121.70
7 	RemDawg Forever 	114.48
8 	Neck-Fix and Chill 	129.23
9 	Last Matts Standing 	128.65
10 	Neck-Fix and Chill (2)	150.78
11 	RemDawg Forever (2) 	133.03
==Single Season Scoring Records==
As teams get eliminated their season will be added to the record books.
All-Tme Single Season HH Point Records
Score 	Player 	Year
3428.76	CP 	2019
3402.18	It's Blitz! Track 2 	2019
3015.53	Mixon Beer 	2020
2997.67	The Guilloteam 	2019
2980.07	Last Coach Standing 	2020
2743.25	@FFDraftScott 	2020
2733.07	It's Blitz! Track 2 	2020
2709.59	Mac 	2019
2422.98	I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls	2019
2377.31	The Guilloteam 	2020
2285.51	CP 	2020
2282.91	Out of Luck 	2020
2134.22	I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls	2021
2046.35	LIVEWithIt 	2019
1941.63	Bobecue Chicken 	2019
1817.79	Carole Pigskin 	2020
1749.51	The Guilloteam 	2021
1736.99	Neck-Fix and Chill 	2019
1611.76	Ya Hate 2 See It 	2020
1512.91	Neck-Fix and Chill 	2020
1509.41	CP 	2021
1483.70	Last Coach Standing 	2021
1473.18	Henry VIII 	2021
1439.40	Hasta Laviska Baby 	2020
1357.00	Henry VIII 	2019
1238.56	Bluedevils 	2019
1182.09	Mixon Beer with Liquor 	2021
1160.81	Ya Hate 2 See It 	2021
1132.61	Henry VIII 	2020
1116.98	Shotti's Bugatti 	2020
1055.63	Mac 	2020
1049.89	LIVEWithIt 	2020
991.57 	Hasta Laviska Baby 	2021
975.59 	Hasta Laviska Baby 	2019
768.10 	Shotti's Bugatti 	2021
717.82 	Out of Luck 	2019
713.12 	I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls	2020
544.55 	It's Blitz! Track 2 	2021
481.22 	@FFDraftScott 	2019
459.96 	Bobecue Chicken 	2020
294.62 	Steve Blackman's Nun 	2021
286.36 	Ya Hate 2 See It 	2019
262.69 	Bad Boys 	2020
115.16 	Mixon Beer 	2019
96.56 	Steve Blackman's Nun 	2020
==All-Time Combined Points Scored==
As teams get eliminated, their updated totals will be added to the record books. Keeling moves himself into 4th all-time on the list and the only mystery remaining now is how high Return of the Mac can climb in the rankings. 
All-Time Combined Points Records
Score 	Player 	Years Played
7223.68	CP 	3
7124.49	The Guilloteam 	3
6679.80	It's Blitz! Track 2 	3
5270.32	I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls	3
4463.77	Last Coach Standing 	2
4312.78	Mixon Beer 	3
3962.79	Henry VIII 	3
3765.22	Return of the Mac 	2
3406.56	Hasta Laviska Baby 	3
3249.90	Neck-Fix and Chill 	2
3224.47	@FFDraftScott 	2
3106.24	LIVE With It 	2
3058.93	Ya Hate 2 See It 	3
3000.73	Out of Luck 	2
2401.59	Bobecue Chicken 	2
1885.08	Shotti's Bugatti 	2
1817.79	Carole Pigskin 	1
1738.10	Bad Boys 	2
1238.56	Bluedevils 	1
698.91 	Phillip's Team 	1
391.19 	Steve Blackman's Nun 	2
==Remaining Budget==
Remaining Budget as of 11/23/2021
Player 	Total Budget
Return of the Mac 	$554
Beach McBungalow 	$427
Bad VRs 	$356
Sloppy Seconds 	$209
The Titanic 	$122
Neck-Fix and Chill 	$107
Out of Luck 	$8
RemDawg Forever 	$0
I Can Dere-lick My Own Balls	0
Last Matts Standing 	0
The Guilloteam 	0
CP 	O
Mixon Beer with Liquor 	0
Ya Hate 2 See It 	0
Hasta Laviska Baby 	0
Shotti's Bugatti 	0
It's Blitz! Track 2 	0
Bad Boys 	0
Pats a bitch 	0
==Conclusion==
Happy Hunting.