Battle of the Cleaning Products

Battle of the Cleaning Products is an episode of Mr. Rrarrg. In this episode, the gang have a feud over which is better: mr clean or dr cleanser.
== Characters ==
* Patrick
* Grugg
* Grr
* Babba
* Rrarrg
* Lebron fish (debut)
* CrazySponge
* Fred
* Unknown
* Mr Krabs
* Howard
* Fish
* Audience
== Transcript ==
(patrick is mopping the floors of the cave)
Patrick: do do do… mopping the dirty floors of this cave.. do do do-
(patrick trips)
Grugg: gruggrgruggrugr (watch out for that wet spot)
Patrick: thanks.
(patrick puts up a wet floor sign)
Patrick: boy do i love using mr clean!
(shot of mr clean bottle)
Grugg: gr-grugg?! (m-mr clean?!)
Patrick: Yeah, the best cleaning product ever invented.
Rrarrg: rararararg! (I agree!)
Grugg: grugrgrgrgug (well i think dr cleanser is better)
Grr: grgrgrg! (me too!)
Patrick: shut up grr, no one asked for your opinion!
Grugg: grugrgrgrgrug, grugrgrggrug (don't listen to them, they prefer the inferior mr clean)
(babba walks into the room)
Babba: babababbaba (hey guys i'm back from the shops)
Patrick: oh hey babba, which one do you prefer-
(zoom out and we see babba isn't there anymore)
Patrick: babba? Oh well. Mr Clean is better!
Grr: gr! grgrgrgrg! (no! dr cleanser!)
Patrick: mr clean!
Grr: grgrgrg! (dr cleanser!)
Patrick: Mr CLEAN!
Grr: grgrg GRGRGRG! (dr CLEANSER!)
Rrarrg: rrarargaraggagrgagrg (ok calm down you two)
Grugg: grugrgrggug (how about you confess that dr cleanser is better!)
Patrick: NEVER!
Grr: grgrgrgrgrggrgrggrr (how about we settle this with a game)
Rrarrg: rararararg? (like what?)
Patrick: oh! i heard a new basketball course is opening downtown!
Grr: grg. grgrgrgrgrgr (sure. let's play basketball)
Grugg: grugrgrgrgug (i like that idea)
Babba: babababababa? (did i hear someone say basketball?)
Patrick: oh hey babba, which one do you-
Babba: babababababa! babababa (i don't have time for that! So what about that basketball?)
Grr: grggr. grgrgrgrgrgrggrgrgrgrgrgr (well you see. We got into a little bit of a feud over what cleaning product is better.)
Babba: bababababa (well, i like to use tide.)
Grr: grgrgrgrrgr? (so you're neutral to this then?)
Babba: bab. (yep)
Patrick: great! then babba can be our point counter thing.
Babba: baba, babab (sure, why not)
(transition to next scene; crazysponge, fred and the mysterious figure from episode 17 are walking to the krusty krab)
CrazySponge: so, why are we going to the krusty krab?
Unknown: to get something to eat obviously. But also to get him
(unknown pulls out a picture of mr krabs out of his coat)
CrazySponge: mhm, i see. 
(they walk into the krusty krab)
Fred: oh, the krusty krab. A lot of good memories happened here.
(wavy flashback transition to the time fred got kicked out of the krusty krab upon entering)
Fred: rev up those fryers, cause i'm sure hungry for-
(mr krabs kicks out fred)
Fred: MY LEG!
(wavy flashback transition to present day)
Fred: good ti-
(unknown shuts his mouth and the three walk up to the ordering station)
Howard: Welcome to the krusty krab, may I take your order?
Unknown: yeah, we'll take 3 krabby patties.
CrazySponge: and a diet dr kelp!
Howard: ok, that'll be $10
(unknown gives howard 10 dollars)
(cut to the gang at the basketball court)
Patrick: Okay, I’m not gonna lie, I cannot remember if I have ever played basketball before.
Rrarrg: rrarararg (me neither.)
Grr: grgrgrgrgrgr (i think you just have to throw a ball into those net things)
Patrick: sounds simple enough. 
(grugg tries throwing a ball into the net and it doesn't land)
Grugg: grug. (dang.)
Grr: grgrgrgrggrr (we might need a little training first)
(cut to patrick)
Patrick: Am I supposed to say something?
Unknown: maybe I can help.
Patrick: huh?
(pan to unknown who is revealed to be a lebron james fish)
Lebron fish: You guys need help?
Grr: gr (yes)
Lebron fish: well i can teach you how to play.
Patrick: alright!
Narrator: montage
(montage starts; lebron fish shows them how to throw the ball and they all fail. Lebron fish is disappointed)
(next lebron fish shows them how to ballin; they all try and fail)
(they try throwing the ball again but this time grr lands)
(they ball again and patrick does so successfully)
(those two things repeat until eventually they all successfully do both things; i don't know how to write montages -Existant)
Narrator: end of montage.
(cut to them on the court lined up)
Lebron fish: Well, I must say that your training was a success.
Patrick: yeah!
Lebron fish: i shall be going now
(lebron fish vanishes)
Grr: grgrg- (what the fu-)
Grugg: grug, grugrgrgrgrug… (okay, let's start this game to…)
Grr: grgrgrgrgrgr! (to determine what cleaning product is better!)
Grugg: grug. (yeah.)
Patrick: time to get ballin'!
(the 4 go to their different sides)
Babba: ba. ba.. ba… BA! (3. 2.. 1… GO!)
(they begin ballin'; patrick balls under grr but grugg steals the ball and runs over to patrick's side)
(rrarrg steals the ball and scores a point for him and patrick)
Babba: babababab (1 point for mr clean)
Patrick: WOOOO! LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOO
Grr: gr! grgrgrgrgrggrgrgr? (hey! we're playing whoever gets five points first remember?)
Patrick: Oh yeah. But we are winning LOSERS!
Babba: babababba! (I’m fucking ballin!)
Grugg: grurgrg (shut up)
(cut to CrazySponge, Fred and Unknown eating their krabby patties and CrazySponge enjoying his drink)
CrazySponge: (sips) Mmm. This is the best dr kelp I've ever tasted in my life.
Unknown: the patties are good too. But remember what we're here for.
CrazySponge: yeah, yeah, i know.
(cut back to the gang at the court)
Babba: bababa (round 2.)
Babba: ba. ba. ba. BA! (3. 2. 1. GO!)
(grr balls to patrick and rrarrg's side of the court)
Grugg: gruggrg! (come on!)
(grr throws the ball in the net)
Babba: bababab! (1 point for dr cleanser!)
Grugg: GRUUUUUUUUGG! (WOOOOOOOO!)
Patrick: Oh come on!
Grr: grgrgrgr (so far we're tied)
Rrarrg: rrarrarrg? (montage?)
Patrick: no rrarrg, no montage. We've already had one.
(cut to a few fish walking near the court who oversee them on the court)
Fish 1: Hey, what are those two doing?
Fish 2: seems like they're ballin'.
(the two look at each other and whizz to the court)
Babba: baba- (round-)
Fish 1: excuse me, can we watch you ballin'?
Patrick: yeah sure whatever.
Babba: abbaba? (are we good?)
Grr: gr. (yes.)
Babba: bab. ba. ba. ba. BA! (alright. 3. 2. 1. GO!)
(rrarrg tries ballin' but grugg steals the ball and scores another point for dr cleanser)
Babba: bababababab! (that's 2 points for dr cleanser!)
Rrarrg: rar! (d'oh!)
Patrick: Maybe let's do a montage.
(montage starts; they are ballin'. what else can i say?)
(montage ends; we see a scoreboard that shows they're both tied at 4 points each)
Patrick: final round. Let's go.
(the scene turns into a cinematic shot of the two sides staring at each other. Then they go back to ballin)
(zoom out to see that a lot of fish have come to see the game)
Babba: abbababa. Babababa? bababababababa?! (it's the final round. Who will win? Dr cleanser or mr clean?!)
Grr: grrrgrgrg (it’s Dr clean you dumbass)
Babba: babbabababa (trash talk huh? Well let’s talk about your overweight mother)
Grugg: grugrggrrgug (ok calm down you two)
Patrick: So when do we start ballin' again?
Babba: Babab. Ba. (Round 9. 3.)
(shot of team dr clean)
Babba: ba. (2.)
(shot of team mr cleanser)
Babba: ba.. (1..)
(shot of them both; shot of the audience; shot of babba)
(zoom in on babba's mouth)
Babba: ba! (go!)
(patrick gets the ball but grr steals it; rrarrg steals the ball from grr but grugg steals it back)
Patrick: Oh no!
(patrick jumps over to the net just as grugg throws the ball into it)
(patrick catches the ball last second and the audience gasps)
(patrick falls from the net and runs over to dr clean's side)
(grr and grugg are chasing him)
Patrick: rrarrg! catch!
(Patrick throws the ball under grr and grugg to rrarrg)
(grugg tries pushing rrarrg but it doesn't work)
(rrarrg runs over to dr cleanser's side; everything's in slow motion now)
Grr: grgr! (oh no!)
(rrarrg is about to throw the ball into the net in slow motion)
(shot of the audience watching in suspense)
(rrarrg throws the ball into the net in slow motion and scores a point for dr clean)
(everything's no longer in slow motion)
Babba: bababaabba! (and dr clean wins!)
(audience cheers)
Patrick: woo! Dr clean is better! Everyone! Shout with me!
Audience: dr clean is better! dr clean is better! dr clean is better!
(audience cheers)
Grr: grgrgrgrgrgr. (I can't believe we lost.)
Grugg: gruggrr! (it's all your fault!)
Grr: grgrg?! (what did i do?!)
(grugg and grr are arguing as we zoom out of the court)
(cut to Mr Krabs in his office doing his taxes)
Mr Krabs: do do do.. doing my taxes because why not… wait, I hate taxes!
(a knock on the door is heard)
Mr Krabs: come in.
(CrazySponge, Unknown, and Fred enter Mr Krabs' office)
Mr Krabs: CrazySponge? Fred? And who are you?
Unknown: that is not important. We need you to come with us.
CrazySponge: yeah!
Unknown: shut it.
Mr Krabs: Is money involved?
Unknown: sure, why not.
Mr Krabs: then count me in boys!
(mr krabs walks up to the three and they leave his office)
(episode ends)
== Trivia ==
* This episode was released before The Lesbian Bar Next Door, which is the second episode of season 2.
* This is the fourth episode of the premiere week.
Category:FireMatch
Category:Existant201
Category:2022 Episodes
Category:2022
Category:Transcripts
Category:Episodes written by FireMatch
Category:The Life And Times Of Mr. Rrarrg!
Category:2022 Transcripts
Category:Episodes
Category:Episode transcripts
Category:2020s