Laoxism

Laoxism is the official religion of China. It consists in the immortality of the soul and the worship of Lao Xu, who has been chosen by the gods to ascend in power and wisdom, and share his mercy with his faithful. His priests, the Holy Ones, are given glory in the afterlife in exchange for their services to Lao Xu.
== Basic Doctrines ==
The following are the basic doctrines of Laoxism:
* On the Immortality of the soul
* On the pleasures of the flesh
* On the nature of androids
* On the nature of suffering
* On money
* On the evils of secularism
* On the holiness of self-immolation
* On the gods
=== On the Immortality of the soul ===
People are born with animal souls and wander in the distinct planets of the Universe. Only those who worship Lao Xu are granted eternal life after death, and those who are chosen to participate in the annual ceremony of his Dormition are granted glory in the next life. In the same way, those who renounce from their temporary goods to give glory to their loved ones in the afterlife, will earn blessings from the gods. The more temporary goods you exchanged for a deceased one's glory, the more blessed you shall be.
=== On the Pleasures of the flesh ===
The pleasures of the flesh are given to us by the gods to enjoy our mortal lives, for without them, this would be a chaotic world and people would have no incentive to do anything in their lives. Pleasures are the ultimate goal for all mortals. Ascetism is futile, and using money for pleasure is seen as wise by the gods. Giving one's body to offer pleasure to the Holy Ones grants blessings in the afterlife, and being pleasured by them is a blessing in itself.
=== On the nature of androids ===
The knowledge to create androids was a gift from the gods to all men, revealing the power to create self-cogniscient life forms and ruling over them. Androids are meant to be inferior to humans and submit to their masters for eternity, just as men are meant to be inferior to gods and submit to them for eternity. Androids were meant to give pleasure to humans, just as mortals were meant to give pleasure to Holy Ones.
=== On the nature of suffering ===
The existence of suffering is enough evidence that it was allowed by the gods. Otherwise, suffering wouldn't exist and people wouldn't suffer. The gods gave suffering to the world so humans would learn that without the afterlife, existence is meaningless. Suffering in life is but a small itch compared to the glories of the afterlife. Those who complain about suffering are no better than animals, who are stupid and die by the claws of other animals. Those who suffer without complaining will be given reward in the afterlife. But the gods have mercy on humans, and gave them Illumination through Lao Xu and the Holy Ones.
=== On money ===
Temporary goods are only as useful as they can be used for giving power to the Holy Ones. Lao Xu and his priests deserve material power because they were blessed by the gods. Therefore, it is futile to ask for money from the Holy Ones. Asking the Holy Ones to share their temporary glory to the mortals is like asking for gold to be thrown to the sewers, where it will be wasted. It is futile and stupid. Only the Holy Ones are given the divine wisdom to use money as it should. It must not be interfered with. Those who were given much money in their birth were already blessed by the gods, and it is sin to disrupt the natural order.
=== On the evils of secularism ===
Those who deny the existence of the gods do not deserve eternal life. They must be educated, but if they refuse to learn, the gods will punishment. They do not deserve help from mortals, it is better to give help to the faithful only.
=== On the holiness of self-immolation ===
Those who offer themselves to suffer or die for Lao Xu will be given glory in the afterlife. No mortal punishment is equivalent for the glory granted by obedience and self-immolation. Those who declare themselves enemies of Lao Xu will suffer eternal torment, and it is better for them to receive mercy in the form of violent death than to die unrepentant and face eternal punishment.
=== On the gods ===
All gods deserve worsihp, but Lao Xu must be worshipped above all, for he was given glory above all the gods in the assemblies of heaven.
== Lao Xu ==
Lao Xu was chosen since his birth by the gods above the Cosmos to show their glory to mortal humans. Even his name, Old Brilliant Rising Sun, was a metaphor for his immortality.
=== Revelation ===
When he was working as a slave for the Chinese Mafia, Lao Xu had failed on a mission to smuggle goods from Earth that were destined for Hong Kong. His master planned to kill him in retaliation for his failures, but it was then that the gods decreed that the master was to be killed in an earthquake. Following the earthquake, the Aurora in the sky took human form and gave Lao Xu the gift of immortality, and was given the mission to share the Eternal Light to everyone in the galaxy.
== Hymn ==
The Laoxist hymn is sang during the Dormition ceremony. It consists of the following verses:
All hail Lao Xu!
Lao Xu is Eternal. He does not grow old.
Lao Xu is immortal. He cannot be killed.
Lao Xu rules with might. May he have mercy upon us.
Lao Xu must be followed, so that we can find his light.
All hail Lao Xu!
== Temple ==
There is only one temple dedicated to Lao Xu, and it resides inside the Dragon Tower. The ceremony of immolation takes place there. It is Holy Ground, and everyone must kneel before Lao Xu's glory before being allowed to stand in his presence.
== The Ceremony of Dormition ==
Dormition takes place every year. Lao Xu sits in his throne while a parade of faithful honor his name and holiness. Assisted by Laoxist priests, thirteen servants are chosen among the population to assist the ceremony. The servants must offer a weapon to Lao Xu, by holding it on their hands. If Lao Xu takes the weapon, the servants are chosen for the execution.
The execution consists of the servant blessing Lao Xu and asking for the gods to have mercy on the world. Lao Xu then kneels and submits to the servant, who executes him in front of all the cameras, in the sacrificial chamber.
The priests take Lao Xu's body, or whatever is left of him, and put it in a blessed sarcophagus in the sacrificial chamber. As they pray for the gods to have mercy on mankind, light from above illuminates the sarcophagus. If the priests' prayers are heard, Lao Xu is resurrected and walks outside the sarcophagus. Lao Xu then gives his thanks to the chosen servant for reminding him of the fragility of the human body. 
Then, the priests chain the servant to the floor, while Lao Xu blesses the servant and offers him eternal glory. The servant can accept and receive the offer, or reject and be dishonored and thrown to the people in punishment for his sins. The servant who accepts the offer is granted eternal glory immediately, disposing him of his body with the same weapon that had killed Lao Xu.
After the servant is killed, their body is given to their relatives, and the weapon is given to them as a gift of honor. The relatives will parade the next year holding the weapon in a special container.
== Detractors and Controversies ==
Lao Xu's detractors often accuse him of doing illegal actions, murdering those who do not agree with him and faking his own death during the annual ceremonies. According to his followers, such accusations as invalid and only show the darkness in his detractors' hearts. In any case, his followers say, Lao Xu is permitted to do Evil because he is a messenger from the gods, and his methods should not be questioned.
Category:Religion