Salt Matyrdom: The brave sacrifice of salt

I went on paint and made this for some reason:
It says: The Guy Who lost his SALT!
This story is based on real events (jk), viewer's discretion is advised!
==Chapter 1: He lost his salt!==
There was an ordinary guy on an ordinary evening in an ordinary restaurant having an ordinary fish and chips while holding an ordinary salt shaker in one hand and a most terrifying and most ominous pepper shaker in the other. You see, this man has a dilemna on his hands. He had just finished eating the fish when he couldn't decide whether or not to use salt or pepper for his fries. This man has the most unordinary ordinary craving for fries. He cannot stand the sight of uneaten fries for even several seconds. If he does see the sight of uneaten fries for even a few seconds, he will go purple in the face, and eventually suffocate to death. So you see, he is not "unordinary", he's extrodinarily unordinarily ordinary. So he was going purple in the face when the most extrodinarily unordinary thing happened! The salt and pepper came to life the salt said: "Use us!" and the pepper said: "Use us or we'll make you sneeze to death!" The man became afraid and hid under the table. The salt and pepper started arguing:﻿
Then they started fighting:
Then all of a sudden they stopped fighting:
Made a truce:
Jumped on the fries:
But unfortunately for the salt, the pepper were lying backstabbers and they started to attack the salt. The salt 
were brave and fought to the last but they were overcome. Angered by this, the man threw all the pepper shakers into the garbage can. He buried them in a cementary and there was a 21 gun salute for the salt matyrs who fought to try and stop the evil of pepper that was spreading. All hail the victorious salty dead!
Category:One-shot
Category:Moodle
Category:Humor
Category:K Rated Stories
Category:Crackfic