Bill Dripson

Bill Dripson appears on Episode 99.5 of the Grub as a representative for the Australian cream industry.  He makes several outlandish claims, including that ‘cream’ is a protected term (like ‘champagne’ and thus can’t be used for things like skin creams), that cream can be used as alternative for water and that he himself has ‘plumbed up [his] house with cream, cream, cream’.  
Dripson also claims that current scientific advice dictates that we should be consuming at least 30 litres of cream per day.   Although evidently ‘blotchy and red’, Bill says his skin would be worse if he didn’t consume that much cream. As a result of his cream consumption Bill also has a perpetual ‘cream moustache’.
Bill ends by directing us to www.cream.com to find recipes for ‘cream and ham’  and ‘cream and beef’.
Bill returns in the following episode (Episode 99.6) speaking to students, where he revises his standards for healthy cream consumption to 'at least 13 glasses of cream a day' in order to stay healthy, although this may be for growing bodies. After handing out pots of cream he concludes by saying 'if you don’t drink your cream I’m gonna come to your house and I’m gonna kill your mum and dad'.
Dripson is mentioned in Episode 105 as a big celebrity in Russia, according to Yuri Grachevsky.
Category:Characters
Category:Regular Characters