High School High/Trailer transcripts

The TriStar Pictures logo plays, then we see various scenes of disarray at Marion Barry High School, set to Coolio's "Gangsta's Paradise." Suddenly, the car radio of an unknown figure is seen. He switches stations, all playing different parts of the song. Finally, he turns his knob to 540, and the song starts over, and "FROM THE HOMIES" slowly zooms in. A student makes the "head cut off" motion at the driver, who turns out to be Richard Clark (Jon Lovitz). He flashes the Vulcan peace sign at him, then "WHO BROUGHT YOU THE NAKED GUN" zooms in. Cut to him and Victoria Chapell (Tia Carrere) in an empty class.
:Richard: Somewhere out there, there's a kid crying, "show me a consonant!" (Cut to a student getting searched, and security putting down various weapons.) "Teach me Πr2!" (Cut to another student with his hair cut in such a way that two tiny cars are driving on it.) Minds like thirsty little sponges, just waiting to soak up knowledge! (As he says this, we briefly cut to a student, then back to the duo.)
The music stops as Richard steps on a loose floorboard and gets whacked in the head. It resumes as a student gets a tall boy from a vending machine, while another student threatens to pummel someone. "IN A SCHOOL WITHOUT HOPE" zooms in, then we cut to a school assembly.
:Principal Doyle (Louise Fletcher): (Holding up a milk carton) Our assistant principal is still missing! (Cut to a classroom blowing up from outside, then to a student dealing watches.)
:Student: Yo, mister, 24 karats, $24.
:Richard: Uh, no thank you, I already have them.
The student walks away, then "COMES A MAN WITHOUT FEAR" zooms in. Back to the hallway.
:Richard: I know what's death! (Cut to Principal Doyle smacking a student with Kid 'n' Play-esque hair on the head.) What's, uh, wack! (Cut to Richard stamping "OVER DUE" on another student's head.) What's straight-up booty!
:Victoria: How was your first day?
:Richard: Not bad! (His leg is chained to the desk.)
"TO CHALLENGE THEIR MINDS" zooms in, then it's back to class.
:Richard: Now, uh, this is your textbook for the semester. They open like this... (As he opens the book, the students are amazed. Then "AND OPEN THEIR HEARTS" zooms in, and we cut to a school dance.)
:Natalie Thompson (Malinda Williams): You know, you're different from everybody else. I mean, most of the boys I know just wanna stare at girls' breasts. You know what I mean?
:Griff McReynolds (Mekhi Phifer): (Breaking his gaze) ...sorry, what?
"JON LOVITZ" zooms in.
:Richard: Don't you think the kids would enjoy a nice song with a melody?
:DJ: What you got, homes?
Richard pulls out a record. The DJ puts it on, and the music changes to Glen Campbell's "Rhinestone Cowboy." He's enjoying it, then we cut to two separate copies of "HIGH," with "SCHOOL" emerging from in-between them. The DJ then scratches the record, and it cuts back to "Gangsta's Paradise" as we cut to the billing block and soundtrack plug, ending the trailer.
Category:Trailer transcripts