Hell.exe

Have you ever wondered if it is possible to visit the afterlife without actually dying? The saying goes that you can only go to Heaven or Hell if you're dead, but this is not entirely true. You can indeed have a brief visit to the afterlife and meet your dead friends, relatives, and even God. Sounds good, right? But there is one catch. It's not exactly easy. Many have returned as changed individuals; some even chose to take their own lives afterwards. Many lost their sanity, and only a small percentage remained what you'd call sane after their journey. Even though they all refuse to describe what they saw, I'm different. I have been to both Heaven and Hell several times. 
In this article, I'm going to describe how to visit Hell and meet some of your dead relatives that have sinned throughout their mortal lives. For the journey, you will need to be a well-rounded individual with a strong mentality, otherwise you will not be able to cope with what you see. Most importantly, you will need to have killed somebody at least once in your life before you try this.
First, head to your nearest church from 12:00AM to 1:00AM on a Sunday night. If the door is locked, gain entry somehow. If it's impossible, then try the second closest church. Once inside, approach the altar and kneel down in a praying position. Then, in a monotone voice, repeat the following scripture clearly: 
"Volo visere terram ubi cruciabitur igne et sulphure, quod cuique secundum modum sibi aeternum massae flumina ripas arboribus non crescit multa milia passuum, ubi pax non est." 
If done correctly, you should fall asleep instantly and wake up in your room. There will be a piece of paper on the end of your bed. On it, there should be a link to a website (this link varies from person to person). 
Find an old computer with no internet connection or any means of communication to the outside world, as you do not want the most horrifying demons imaginable to know your location. Boot up the computer, load up an internet browser, and enter the link. Despite the lack of internet connection, you should be directed to a black page with a hyperlink in the middle stating your name and date of death. Whatever you do, do not click on the hyperlink. Instead, save the page and view the HTML file in Notepad. Scroll to the bottom of the document; there should be an address. Make sure you write it down. Once you’re finished with the computer, take it as far away as you can, destroy it, and never return to the church you visited again. 
A week later, visit the address you wrote down. It should be an old abandoned warehouse that was never there before. Do not enter this building yet. Instead, knock on the door exactly 6 times. Any more or less and you will be greeted by the Devil himself and damned to a place far worse than Hell.
If all is well, an old man should open the door and hand you a blank CD with the words "hell.exe" written on it. Run this on another PC you’re willing to sacrifice with no inward or outward communication. On the CD will be two files: diablo.jpg and hell.exe. Do not view diablo.jpg. It will cause you to rip your eyes out (don't worry, it does not have a thumbnail). Just run hell.exe.
Instantly, your monitor will start flickering, and gruesome pictures of the mutilated corpses of your dead relatives should flash quickly on and off your screen. Then a window will pop up with two buttons, one saying 'come' and one saying 'leave'. Now is your last chance to turn back. If you want to visit Hell, then click on 'come'. If not, click 'leave' - you will fall unconscious and wake up in your bedroom with no memory hell.exe even existed. All evidence of its existence will be lost. If you choose 'come', the window will close and the computer will spontaneously combust, along with the CD. Do not leave the room you’re in. Just let the flames spread until the heat knocks you unconscious. 
You should wake up on a hospital bed in a dark room with no clothes on. Do not get out of the bed, just lay there. After about five minutes, two 'people' should enter the room. I cannot be any clearer on this. keep your eyes tightly shut when they approach your bed. If you look at them even once, they will rip you to pieces. They will discuss in familiar voices how unfortunate your death was and describe it in complete detail. This coincides with the date of death you found on the website. Cover your ears if you do not want to hear your own fate. Afterwards, they will leave the room hastily. Wait about ten minutes, then exit the room.
Once you have exited the room, you should be in a very long corridor with the lights out. Start walking down the corridor. Once you have walked about 3 kilometers, all the lights should turn on. When this happens run. Run as fast as you can down the corridor until you reach a fire escape door. Throw yourself through it at full force and then slam the door shut behind you as soon as you burst through.
You are now in Limbo.
Your surroundings should be a large desert-like wasteland with no signs of life. Search the vast emptiness for a sharp rock or a cliff edge (something you can use to end your own life), as in order to reach the gates of Hell, you need to kill yourself in Limbo. Be cautious when exploring; even though this isn't Hell, there are some monsters lurking about in caverns that will try to turn you into one of them. They are not as dangerous as the monsters you encounter in Hell - just unbaptised souls cast in Limbo to expend eternity endlessly exploring the dark cavern systems. 
Before killing yourself, you must remove your eyes from their sockets and deafen yourself somehow. You should only have your sense of touch, taste and smell left. You cannot ever see or hear Hell, if you value your sanity, that is. Don't worry, once you return to the human world, you will have your senses back. 
When you wish to leave Hell, simply shout this Latin phrase as loud as you can: "Est non satis". I cannot provide any more instructions. I feel that if I give away more information, I'll be putting myself at risk. But there is somebody who recorded their findings: a man named Ian McGowan. He successfully went to hell and returned. Shortly after, he brutally murdered most of his family and then hung himself. When they found his body, there was a note in his possession. In it, he describes what he saw in detail.
==Ian's Note==
If you are reading this, then I have done the unforgivable. I have killed the people I care about the most in the worst possible manner. But I did it to save them from a fate far worse than a painful death. 
Last week, I tried to visit my dead father in Hell. He was a raging alcoholic that would come home from the pub and beat me and my mother. He died of liver disease when I was 13. I wanted to see him get what he deserved. 
What I saw in Hell was something mortals should never experience in their lifetimes. After blinding, deafening, then finally killing myself in that fucking wasteland, I awoke in what felt like a furnace. It was so excruciatingly hot, and I couldn't move. I began to hear voices in my head and they all said the same thing, "Help me".
The voices were of many people I knew that had died. They grew louder and louder and my surroundings got hotter and hotter until everything stopped. I then saw something that I cannot begin to describe. I saw every sin and act of violence. Greed, bloodlust, and gluttony played out all at the same time in my head. I felt the worst feeling of, how can I describe it, melancholy I have ever experienced in my life. I felt as if nothing mattered anymore. 
That's when he arrived. Suddenly, my sight returned, but all I could see was darkness. Then something appeared in front of me. I cannot describe its appearance. All I can say is that it was not human or even a recognizable being, but an entity of pure unadulterated terror. I knew this was the Devil. He talked to me telepathically in no recognizable language, but I somehow fully understood what he was saying. He told me the fate of the universe and what I must do, my duty.
I owe him my soul I owe him my soul I OWE HIM MY SOUL I OWE HIM MY SOUL I OWE HIM MY SOUL I OWE HIM MY SOUL I OWE HIM MY SOUL I OWE HIM MY SOUL I OWE HIM MY SOUL I OWE HIM MY SOUL I...
[The rest of the page is unreadable and covered in what appears to be blood.]
Category:Historical Archive
Category:Ritual
Category:Demon/Devil
Category:Computers and Internet
Category:Diary/Journal
Category:Mental Illness