Girls vs Boys

guest star - Arjay Smith, Scarlett Johansson and David Hasselhoff
Musical guest - Darius Rucker
In this one, the silvers disappeared back in time to film premiere of The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
== Script ==
June: Hello and welcome to my magic show! Today, we're going to be doing the disappearing act. But first, I need a volunteer. A-ha! How about the siblings?
Erica: What, us?
Corey: your gonna make us disappear?
June: And now, when I snap my fingers, they will disappear to 2004 where The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie premiered at all cinemas. In 3, 2, 1, NOW! Hey presto! The silvers has diappeared to another dimension!
Erica: What’s with the Nickelodeon Movies? 
Corey: The blue ball bursts out of an explosion surrounded by bright streaks, then a zeppelin floats through an orange flower breaking it apart. Goldfish swim by and bubbles form in a colorful kaleidoscope, a bouncy, Beatles-like tune played with sound effects including wind noises, explosions and ripples, then it ends with underwater sounds when the Nickelodeon Movies logo forms
Erica: so, that was the Nickelodeon blimp used for the network's Kids Choice Awards, which is represented as a trophy for outstanding achievement in kids' programming, i won a lot of blimps for throwback cartoon (holds up the blimp and hugs it)
Corey: that was over the years
Captain Bart the Pirate: [Opens the trunk] I never thought I'd see it with me own eye. Tickets to The SpongeBob Movie! [The pirates cheer]
Erica: (now dressed in a female pirate costume) they got tickets for The SpongeBob Movie
Corey: (now dressed in a pirate costume) and that means, they’re sailing to the movie theater, singing the SpongeBob SquarePants Theme Song
Pirates: ♪Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants. Absorbent and yellow and porous is he? SpongeBob SquarePants. If nautical nonsense be something you wish? SpongeBob SquarePants. Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish? SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. Sponge-Bob Square-Pants. 
Erica: Those pirates got out their ship to hog the snack bar and get some popcorn
Corey: and they rush into the theater room, where the movie starts, so, here’s our first cartoon (turns first page)
Erica: Three cheers for Sniz and Fondue, they all said
All [But SpongeBob]: [Cheer and then lift SpongeBob up on their shoulders.] Three cheers for the manager! Hip! Hip! [Honk!] Hip! Hip! [Honk!] Hip! Hip! [Honking]
Corey: why are they making a horn sound instead of hooray?
SpongeBob: Hooray! Gary! I had that dream again! And it’s finally going to come true! [He runs over to his calendar.] Today! Sorry about this calendar. [He tears off the calendar page for the day before to reveal "March 7." On the page, it has a picture of the Krusty Krab 2 with rainbows and hearts around it.] Because today is the grand-opening ceremony for The Krusty Krab 2, where Mr. Krabs will announce the new manager.
Gary: Meow.
SpongeBob: Who's it gonna be, Gary? Well, let's ask my wall of 374 consecutive employee-of-the-month awards. [Camera pulls up, revealing many "employee of the month" portraits]
SpongeBob's E.O.T.M. Awards: SpongeBob SquarePants!
Corey: says his "employee of the month" portraits
Mr. Krabs: Welcome. Welcome, everyone, to the grand opening of The Krusty Krab 2. [The crowd applauds]
Erica: This is the day Mr. Krabs welcomes everyone to the grand opening ceremony of The Krusty Krab 2
Mr. Krabs: Now, before we begin with the ribbon-cutting, I'd like to announce the name of our new manager.
SpongeBob: Yay! Yeah! Ow! Ow, ow! Yeah! Now we're talking! Yeah! Ow! Shh!
Corey: I wonder who’s the new manager?
Mr. Krabs: Please welcome our new manager... Squidward Tentacles!
Erica: (gasps) Squidward Tentacles was the new manger?!
SpongeBob: People of Bikini Bottom, as the manager of...
Mr. Krabs: Uh, SpongeBob.
SpongeBob: Hold the phone, folks, I'm getting an important news flash from Mr. Krabs.
Erica: that bit’s kinda boring, what if we could skip the next one?
Corey: on it! (Uses a remote to fast forward)
Goofy Goober Announcer: Hey, all you Goobers, it's time to say howdy to your favorite undersea peanut, Goofy Goober!
Goofy Goober: Ho-ho-ho!
Kids: Howdy, Goofy Goober!
Goofy Goober: Hey, fellow Goofy Goobers. Time to sing!
Goofy Goober: ♪Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah. You're a Goofy Goober, yeah. We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah.♪
Goofy Goober and Kids: ♪Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah!♪
Erica: poor SpongeBob sobbing at the Nut Bar, I feel bad for him
Corey: me too
Waiter: Here's your Goober Meal, sir.
Patrick: I'm supposed to get a toy with this. [Waiter throws one at him] Thanks.
SpongeBob: [sighs] I'm gonna head home, Pat. The celebration's off.
Patrick: Are you sure?
SpongeBob: Yeah. I'm not in a Goober mood. [he starts to walk away]
Patrick: Okay, see you.
Waiter: [hands Patrick a Triple Gooberberry Sunrise] And here's your Triple Gooberberry Sunrise, sir. [SpongeBob starts to walk back to Patrick]
Patrick: Yum!
SpongeBob: Oh. A Triple Gooberberry Sunrise, huh? I guess I could use one of those.
Patrick: Now you're talking. Hey, waiter, we need another one over here.
Waiter: [Handing SpongeBob one] There you go.
SpongeBob: [Admiring it] Ooh! [SpongeBob and Patrick gleefully eat rapidly and get ice cream on the waiter]
Erica: they’re eating some Triple Gooberberry Sunrise?
Corey: wish we might have one
SpongeBob: Boy, Pat, that hit the spot. I'm feeling better already.
Patrick: Yeah.
SpongeBob: Waiter, let's get another round over here. [then the waiter gives them two more. They eat them and get more ice cream on the waiter] Oh, Mr. Waiter. Two more, please. [Then the waiter gives them two more]
Both: Whooooo! [they eat the sundaes and get even more ice cream on the waiter]
SpongeBob: Waiter. [Then they eat two more. By this time, the waiter is covered in ice cream. We see Patrick finishing his ice cream] Oh, waiter. [singsong] Waiter. [slurring] Wai-toor. [yelling angrily and pounding on the table. The bowls are stacked sideways] WAITER!
Waiter: [puts a scoop of ice cream on a sundae] Why do I always get the nuts?
Corey: to think get got drunk on ice cream?
SpongeBob: [Up on stage holding a lollipop] All right, folks, this one goes out to my two bestest friends in the whole world: [We see Patrick and the Goofy Goober up on stage, too] Patrick and this big peanut guy. It's a little ditty called...
Both: "Waaaaaiiittteeeeer!"
Erica: do they ever stop saying waiter all the time?
[The next morning, SpongeBob wakes up to find the waiter trying to get him up]
Waiter: [To SpongeBob] Hey. Hey, get up. Hey, come on, buddy. I wanna go home. Come on, pal.
SpongeBob: [After recovering] Oh, my head. [He looks drunk]
Waiter: Listen to me. It's 8 in the morning. Go scrape up your friend and get going.
Corey: Now that’s an action strange episode featuring Arjay Smith, look, it’s Dennis, he arrived at The Thug Tug
Dennis: [He arrives at The Thug Tug, and notices soap on SpongeBob's footprint. He unmasks himself] Hmm... [He blows the soap, forming a bubble. Images of SpongeBob and Patrick giggling appear in it. Suddenly, all of the thugs appear]
Tough Fish #1 (Victor): Hey! 
Erica: (gasps) oh no! The thugs!
Tough Fish #1 (Victor): You may not know it, cowboy, but we got a rule around here about blowing bubbles. [Snaps his fingers and all of the thugs say the rule]
All Thugs: All bubble-blowing babies will be beaten senseless by--
[Dennis punches Victor out of his shoes and socks, who screams and flies into the Thug Tug.]
All Thugs: ...every...able-bodied...patron....in the....bar.... [Victor crashlands into the Thug Tug. The Tug tilts back and quickly sinks. Dennis drives away as the Thugs watch in fear.]
Corey: Dennis, why would you have to punch Victor? He’s trying to give you the rules about blowing bubbles
SpongeBob: I'm going home, Patrick.
Patrick: But what about Mr. Krabs?
SpongeBob: What about us? We'll never survive in that trench! You said it yourself, this is man's country. And let's face it, Pat. We're just...kids.
Patrick: We're not kids!
SpongeBob: OPEN YOUR EYES, PATRICK!! We blow bubbles, we eat ice cream, we worship a dancing peanut, for corn's sake! WE DON'T BELONG OUT HERE!
Patrick: We do not worship him!?
SpongeBob: [Pulls down his shorts] Patrick. You've been wearing the same Goofy Goober Peanut Party underpants for three years straight! [We see Patrick's underwear with the Goofy Goober pictures on it] What do you call that!?
Patrick: Worship? [Gets tears in his eyes] OH, YOU'RE RIGHT, SPONGEBOB....WE ARE KIDS....! [Runs off while sobbing then falls down]
Erica: goodness, he’s wearing his underwear with Goofy Goober pictures
SpongeBob: Pull your pants up, Patrick. We're going home.
Mindy: But you can't go home.
Corey: that can’t be Mindy?
SpongeBob: How much did you hear?
Mindy: I heard enough.
Patrick: Did you see my underwear?
Mindy: No, Patrick.
Patrick: [About to pull down his shorts] Did you want to?
Mindy: Look, guys, you may be kids, but you're the only ones left who can get that crown.
SpongeBob: What do you mean, the only ones left?
Mindy: Things have gotten a lot worse since you left Bikini Bottom. [Pulls out a magical clam, which opens up revealing Bikini Bottom now] Or should I say Planktopolis?
Slaves: All hail Plankton.
Plankton: [Holding a whip] No resting! This monument celebrating my glory isn't gonna build itself! Move faster!
SpongeBob: Oh my gosh! Patrick, look! Plankton's turned everyone we know into slaves. [We see what everyone is doing work for Plankton] Squidward, Sandy, Mrs. Puff, [SpongeBob gasps] even Gary.
Erica: Can't your father do something?
Mindy: My father's too distracted by his bald spot to do anything. [The magical clam shows Neptune's bald spot about to be sprayed by the Squire with hair growth spray]
Neptune: Squire, will you hurry? [The Squire is nervous. He closes his eyes and accidentally sprays Neptune's eyes, which grow hair. Neptune screams in pain]
Mindy: [She closes the clam] So you see, you can't quit. The fate of Bikini Bottom rests in your hands.
Corey: But... but we're just...
Mindy: Hey, it doesn't matter if you're kids. What's so wrong with being a kid, anyway? Kids rule! You don't need to be a man to do this. You just gotta believe in yourself. You just gotta believe! [Swims up into the sky, then comes back down]
SpongeBob: I believe.
Mindy: That's the spirit!
SpongeBob: I believe that...everybody I know is a goner! [He and Patrick begin sobbing]
Mindy: Come on, guys. [They don't stop] Guys... [They still don't stop] Guys? [they both spray tears to each other's mouths] Ew!
Erica: this might go on, so let’s move on to the next cartoon (turns page)
David Hasselhoff: [Arrives below Bikini Bottom] Okay, fellas, this is where you get off. Bikini Bottom's directly below.
SpongeBob: But we'll never be able to float down in time.
Erica: and we’re back with kablam! If your joining us, we rode on David Hasselhoff
Mr. Krabs: [Closes his eyes] No! [Just then, SpongeBob and Patrick fall through the roof. Krabs is about to be fried, but the crown blocks the ray, and it is blasted up to the surface, where Hasselhoff is floating on his back]
David Hasselhoff: You done good, Hasselhoff. You done... [He is blasted with Neptune's ray but survives] Ow.
SpongeBob: You know, I've been through a lot in the past six days, five minutes, twenty-seven-and-a-half seconds. And if I've learned anything during that time, It's that you are who you are.
Plankton: That's right...
SpongeBob: And no amount of mermaid magic... [Turns to Mindy, who looks down sadly] ...or managerial promotion... [Turns to the frozen Mr. Krabs] ...or some other third thing... can make me anything more than what I really am inside: A kid.
Plankton: That's great. Now, get back against the wall.
SpongeBob: [over microphone] But that's okay.
Plankton: What? What's going on?
SpongeBob: Because I did what everyone said a kid couldn't do. I made it to Shell City, and I beat the Cyclops, and I rode the Hasselhoff, and I brought the crown back.
Plankton: All right, we get the point....
SpongeBob: So, yeah, I'm a kid. [Dry ice smoke surrounds Plankton, and a spotlight falls on SpongeBob] And I'm also a goofball. And a wing nut. And a Knucklehead McSpazatron!
Plankton: [coughs from the smoke] What's going on here?
SpongeBob: But most of all, I'm...... [he swipes his arm]
Plankton: Okay, settle down. Take it easy.
SpongeBob: I'm.....I'M......
Plankton: What the scallop?!
SpongeBob: [Bursts into song] ♪I'M A GOOFY GOOBER! ROCK!♪ [Plankton is flung into the wall]
Plankton: [He is recovering from being flung into the wall] What's happening? Huh? [Sees SpongeBob dancing] His dance moves are impressive, but I'm in control. [To slaves] Seize him!
People: All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton. [Crowd in around SpongeBob. A few seconds later, SpongeBob bursts out in a wizard outfit, playing an electric guitar. He slowly goes up while Plankton and Mr. Krabs look at him ascend]
Patrick: Whoo!
[As SpongeBob plays the electric guitar, its headstock lights up and a laser beam blasts out of it and destroys a slave's helmet]
Freed Fish: [After SpongeBob zaps his helmet, and it comes off] I'm free. I've been freed!
Plankton: What? [SpongeBob zaps more helmets off] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! [SpongeBob twirls into action, zapping even more helmets off] My precious helmets!
Squidward: [SpongeBob zaps his helmet] Ha!
Mrs. Puff: [SpongeBob zaps her helmet] Whoo!
Sandy: [SpongeBob zaps her helmet] Yee-haw!
Gary: [SpongeBob zaps his helmet] Meow. [SpongeBob blasts the antenna, zapping all the helmets and freeing everybody]
Plankton: His chops are too righteous! The helmets can't handle this level of rock 'n' roll! Karen, DO SOMETHING!! Karen? [Looks for her. She is surfing through the crowd] All right, that's the last straw! Neptune, I command you to- [SpongeBob zaps Neptune's helmet. Mindy hands him his crown]
Mindy: Here you go, Daddy.
Plankton: I... better get outta here. [Runs for the door, but a crowd of freed fish burst in]
Sandals: Look, it's the wizard who saved us.
Plankton: Out of my way, fools. [The freed fish ignore him and rush to see SpongeBob, stomping over Plankton in the process] Ow! Ow! Ow! [yelping]
Erica: Do you want to hear something really bad?
Jimmy McGee: Of course. 
Corey: Gosh, your hands are shaking.
Jimmy McGee: I know. 'Cause this one's really, really bad.
Corey: For years now, Fox has been... (voice dub) programming shows that the whole family can enjoy.
Erica: Oh, my God! You don't suppose they're gonna start... (voice dub) entertaing America with hits like House, American ldol and American ldol Results Show.
Jimmy McGee: I'm afraid they might. But I will not be silenced. The truth is...
(Schneider's Bakery Early variant (2004-2005) logo)
Jimmy McGee: Okay. What I was going to say was...
someone: Dorn quiet! Jerk.
June: Ladies and gentlemen, it’s Darius Rucker!
(crowd cheers) 
Darius Rucker: Heading down south to the land of the pines
I'm thumbing my way into North Carolina
Staring up the road and pray to God I see headlights
I made it down the coast in seventeen hours
Picking me a bouquet of dogwood flowers
And I'm a-hopin' for Raleigh, I can see my baby tonight
So rock me momma like a wagon wheel
Rock me momma any way you feel
Hey momma rock me
Rock me momma like the wind and the rain
Rock me momma like a south bound train
Hey momma rock me
Running from the cold up in New England
I was born to be a fiddler in an old time string band
My baby plays a guitar, I pick a banjo now
Oh, north country winters keep a-getting me down
Lost my money playing poker so I had to leave town
But I ain't turning back to living that old life no more
So rock me momma like a wagon wheel
Rock me momma any way you feel
Hey momma rock me
Rock me momma like the wind and the rain
Rock me momma like a south bound train
Hey momma rock me
Walkin' to the south out of Roanoke
I caught a trucker out of Philly had a nice long toke
But he's a-heading west from the Cumberland gap
To Johnson City, Tennessee
I gotta get a move on before the sun
I hear my baby calling my name and I know that she's the only one
And if I die in Raleigh at least I will die free
So rock me momma like a wagon wheel
Rock me momma any way you feel
Hey momma rock me
Oh, rock me momma like the wind and the rain
Rock me momma like a south bound train
Hey, hey momma rock me
Oh, so rock me momma like a wagon wheel
Rock me momma any way you feel (I wanna feel)
Hey, hey momma rock me (momma rock me, momma rock me)
Rock me momma like the wind and the rain
Rock me momma like a south bound train
(I wanna rock like a south bound train)
Hey momma rock me
Rock me