Second Fair

Second Fair - 13th January 2014 - Day 234 - AKA The Draygan'Fel
Resounding success.
This one was done on the boards, not ingame. It took place one game week after our defeat of Agaronak - the Adult Red Dragon.
== Writeup ==
“The forest people” is not what they call themselves of course. A mixture of runaway Aberdeenians, back-to-nature humans and outcast Dalish elves form a loose society, stretching from the Nettlewood north-west of Sandpoint to the Forest of Hope right on Dejune’s doorstep.
Drusilla is still one of their more prominent members, trading with other forest people for the supplies and herbs that she does not have easy access to. To the surprise of no one, while there is a small gathering of forest people in Dejune today, Drusilla has elected not to attend. However, the forest people have been taking a more active role in the day-to-day life of Dejune recently, trading some of their carefree nature for the opportunity to be close to Kruin, Erika and other fey. Whether this is loyalty to the Seelie or just passionate curiosity remains to be seen. A herb garden can be seen near their thicket, and someone seems to have a talent for repairing and improving wooden objects.
Dejune itself has grown a lot since the last fair. A combination of the lyre, incoming wealth, and the Mosswood highway has helped the town expand quickly. The number of houses has quadrupled, and the town now has all the major services, freeing its citizens up from taking long ferry rides up to Zelkor’s Ferry for essential supplies. 
Today marks the formal opening of the marketplace and the repair of the town square since the “lava drake incident”. It’s a good day for it too, one of the last warm days before autumn gets ready to hand over to winter. The fair is being referred to as the “Draygan’fel”, a term that seems to be mutually intelligible to the Elvish, Aberdeenian, and Common-speakers alike.  The forest people have risen to the occasion, constructing a life-sized replica of the dragon out of wood, pine-needles, fallen leaves and tar. It’s an excellent compromise between having the dragon on display and Mortimer’s very real and exceptionally valid concern about “asshole necromancers”.
Today is about one thing to the exclusion of all others: The sheer power of the Calaelen Dominion. High Lady Maya D’Larariel is striding through the early morning crowds in her blue-and silver robe of office, and for the first time her four sullen bodyguards are in armor that has felt the soft caress of polishing powder. She has the air of a schoolteacher inspecting the classes work, and it would seem that her time in Cheliax has left some impression on her. She carries a sword and a spell-component pouch, although they seem to be more for the “look” of it, rather than actual function.
Falnil and Kyrian of the Duskguard look exhausted, having spent the night hunting bandits who robbed a caravan within sight of the town. Today, duties will be swapped and the Duskguard will take shifts napping and providing assistance in the town, while the Runners patrol for any more enterprising thugs, looking to pick off the caravans coming in to town. Barrak claims that Kyrian stared off into the middle distance and said “The revelry of this day shall not be stopped by those whose antipathy for the law shall bring them so low” to which Barrak had absolutely no response at all. 
The Church of the Fallen Sword holds a short sermon, where Marle preaches the importance of forming a good community by giving to the needy, respecting authority and having no mercy at all for those who would endanger the town and their lives. This segues into a short speech explaining why the dragon was killed, and why it’s so excellent that there’s none of it’s kind left. Marle holds a dragon tooth and gestures with it during the speech to great effect. After she finishes a very surly Snooks takes the stage to speak of Dwerfater to the new craftsmen in town, which sounds more like a lesson on the importance of keeping your work-tools in good condition, but he gets applause anyway. Some of Perritt's influence has leaked out, and the runeforge has gotten a few people to consider Dwerfater seriously.
Today also marks the opening of the new watch house, which is captained by Captain Shylhenyssae who goes by the name “Icy” for obvious reasons. She is old even for an elf and worked as a “co-ordination officer” at a watch-house in Tsuen. Apparently this consisted of her looking at case notes from around the city and trying to spot patterns or MOs, Tsuen having a very advanced and paper-heavy approach to law enforcement. Icy leads her squad of a half-dozen sundry elf and tengu refugees on patrols around the town, anxious to make a good first impression. She carries a “traditional weapon of the Tsuen lawgaurd”, a kusarigama. Later in the day the watch plan to put on a display where they demonstrate their new weapon on rotted melons.
The fair is formally opened by Frey giving a short speech about why there’s a fair, and what there will be to do today. Frey’s clearly getting better at speeches and she sensibly leaves mentioning the treasure hunt until the end of the speech.  As soon as she does, everyone under the age of 14 scatters and the fair has officially started.
The dragon-effigy is set up, and a “Do Not Set Fire To This” sign is added out of some sort of plea to the gods of false hope.  It’s impressive, and the crowd are in awe of its size. The effigies’ wingspan is a touch over 60ft. (20 meters) ((The length of your house, Fiach)) with some wooden struts keeping the whole things from collapsing. When pressed, the forest people admitted the Dragon had been a threat to them for many years, and had burned down sections of the forest many times, which was often blamed on the forest people themselves. The effigy is partly an offer of thanks, and partly a few decades of anger given form.
People are wandering around the new market square, and trade is good. Winter is not long off, and the first few jars of preserved fruits are already appearing. Dejune jerky is also selling well, with promises that it would keep long into the winter. The Great Downward has a stall as well, selling numerous objects from their adventures. This stall serves to highlight the truth, that there are in fact two fairs being held today. One fair is for the common folk to trade and stock up while having a bit of a laugh and the other fair where adventurers, minor nobles, and the wealthy browse expensive magical items and take tours of the castle. There doesn’t seem to be much friction between these groups, but for the first time Dejune is accessible to many people of both groups, and the divide is at least visible.
Brunch is served, courtesy of Crab Rolls. They are selling the “Dragonflesh”, and giving a free slice of tourte away with each purchase, mostly because they baked way too much tourte (a kind of cheap brown bread). Something has gone horribly wrong here, as the main customer at the store are not the hungry, but rather alchemists, teachers, historians and mystics, each convinced that they should be able to buy as much of the meat as they can carry There is not enough to go round, and the Duskfall are twice required to break up the fight. In the end Crab Rolls are left with 7,500gp and a massive pile of tourte bread.
Tragedy strikes next, as an unconscious boy is carried into the square, thick blood leaking from a dent at the base of his skull. Icy puts her hand up as the one who did it; apparently the boy (the son of a wealthy trader) had found one of the red treasure-hunting rocks and the enterprising lad had elected to spend the morning painting two-dozen other rocks the same color. Icy had surprised him, and when the boy fled, she “lightly, gently as a lamb” swung the blunt end of her kusarigama at him. Clerical magic heals the boy fully, who is deemed to have been punished enough. 
Awkwardly, no one comes to the boys defence. Icy truthfully states that she did her job; anyone who runs from the watch will be stopped, one way or another, with both the Duskfall and the Runners agreeing that is how things are done where they’re from. Things take a turn when the boy’s father arrives, only to proceed to berate and beat the child for being a “poor cheat” and “damaging [the father’s] reputation as an honest businessman”. By the end of it even Icy looks like they’re willing to just pretend none of it happened. By the time everyone has calmed down and gone back to their business, the two-dozen counterfeit rocks have disappeared. Jaq joined the treasure hunt, looking for the counterfeits. Erika offered to help, explaining that she could smell the paint on the fakes, and had a vested interest in making sure no one cheated at “a game of the forest”. Fifteen minutes later Jaq conclusively proved that Erika was the thief. She professed her innocence by turning invisible and making farting noises, as princesses are wont to do. The game would end at sundown with a young dwarven lad winning and collecting 20gp, more than his family earned in a month. This was only the start of the tradition called “Shades is really bad at setting rewards for things and should not be allowed to do so again”. Karina is said to be working on an acronym.
Haku takes this time to announce the grand-reopening of the Planar Anchor Tavern, and says that the first drink is free. He later clarifies that he meant only the first drink was free, which Killingsworth had already ordered and drunk before the confusion was sorted. 
Wokka, Raff and Short Yak had painted their scales red, yellow and green (respectively) for the occasion. When asked whether this was as a draconic thing or somehow related to the planes, Raff responded with “Yes. Yes it is”. The inn commenced the old alchemical ritual of converting alcohol to silver and urine with some gusto.
The kusarigama demonstration is quietly cancelled in the run-up to lunch, and it is finally late enough in the day for adventurers to start arriving en masse, some still rubbing sleep from their eyes. There is even the occasional “pop” of a teleport spell as a few mages from Tsar arrive to see what all the fuss is about. While the number of aristocrats remains about the same, the number of wealthy traders and adventurers has more than doubled since the last fair, and more arrive as the day goes on. The attendance from Sandpoint is at an all time low.
What happened next caught everyone by surprise. With a loud pop the dragon effigy disappeared, replaced instead by a red dragon which let out a mighty roar. It unfolded it’s wings with a clap of thunder and began to scan the crowd, it’s mouth drooling hungrily. Credit where it was due, the Duskfall and Runners both drew weapons and stood their ground and even Barrak drew his short sword and did his best to look brave. The traders, fairgoers (and most of the adventurers) screamed and fled. With a cry of “Gerhfarkyarsalf yahfakinwyrmfarrat” a dwarven hammer struck the dragon between the eyes. With a loud “hiss” the major image was dispelled, the stunned silence broken only the sound of arcane casters high-fiving. A group project by Killingsworth, Kruin, Erika, Avale and Fairweather had pulled off the daring caper. After Snooks had been led away to go have a lie down, it was declared to have been “a good jape” by Frey, with the heavy implication that any further conduct in this manner would be met with summary execution. Falnil of the Duskguard was inconsolable with rage, as many lawful creatures are after meeting Killingsworth and Kruin for the first time.
A gust of wind provided a nice distraction, and the kite tournament began in earnest. The 100 gold prize was obviously too much, as the contestants were all playing to win. The first round (basic low flying) went on as strings were cut, rocks were thrown and a fight broke out. A few mending casts and one of the watch breaking a contestant’s jaw on his fist put a lid on the worst of it. Dragons and Dire Crows were the most common theme. First Mate Helga Halfstorm had made a kite resembling a kind of kraken crossed with a seagull that flew beautifully. There was some discussion among the judges about whether using real seagull wings was cheating, but she was eventually declared the winner. After receiving the prize she cut the string to her kite and spent the rest of the day lying on her back in some soft grass, staring at the clouds. Mirrax explained that “she’s a bit funny about the wind. You know how Halflings are” which wasn’t an explanation at all, but no one felt like mentioning it.
The Afternoon was spent giving various self-processed nobles a tour of the castle and church, while Avale ran a game for the other horsemen that was a lot like polo, except using two pigs heads that were pinned together with a 3-foot iron rod. Everyone had fun at least, although after the 4th “new ball”, Karina forbade them from continuing the game. Barrak declared Avale the winner.
While the fancy people were cooing over the Maelstrom Device in the castle, the track for the badger races was set up. The track was simply a line of torches on stakes, set 20ft apart. Badgers are nocturnal, so the actual race would need to wait until nightfall. All members of the Watch, Runners and Duskfall were surreptitiously led away from the tavern, so the card and spyglass tournaments could start. A true drinking contest can’t start until enough people are so broke that they can’t afford to not enter a free drinking contest.
The crowds of adventurers featured some old faces. The Fifth Council Rangers showed up along with The Avatars and Three Feet Deep, among dozens of new faces. The White Flight showed made an appearance, but did not bring Herb with them, stating that there was no way they could manage to explain this to him. The overall mood was more than a little grim, monster attacks, plagues and blights were becoming more common over the continent, and people were beginning to worry.
As the light faded, people who had been eyeing off the various sale items began to put in offers. Throughout the day, Frey and Talisa had been handling the sales, occasionally calling upon Agamemnon or Tabitha to speak on an item’s behalf. The “star power” seemed to be working, many of the younger adventurers stood in awe of them.
Night fell, and the tavern turned out to watch the badger races. The drinking contest was still ongoing, as Killingsworth explained that this was a test of endurance; the man who drank the most pints of "drink" before sunrise would be declared the winner. Laniss correctly surmised that "drink" was called that only because it was liquid, although his best guess as to it's ingredients was "a whole pig, basted in apple sauce, fermented in a cask with hops, barley and live rats". He declined the offer of a cup.
Badger races as a strange affair. Several people started books, although it was clear that they fey have no concept of gambling on the races. A dozen badgers were lined up in a field, while a fey cast speak with animals and began to explain. From what you were able to gather, the badgers were asked politely to run along the track (picked out by the torches), and would be rewarded with berries mixed with honey when they reached the end.
The track was relatively small, winding around the town with pits, jumps and little flaming hoops (mostly set up by other guests). The race started and everyone cheered, although it was very quickly clear that these badgers were neither sprinters nor runners, and slowed to half-pace after the first 20 meters. The Great Downwards own Puddles was in the race, but he performed no better than the others.
When any of the obstacles came up, the badgers stopped as a group and appeared to confer. A minute later, they all skipped the tricky bit of the course, taking a shortcut through the town. Once they'd found the track again they waited for everyone to catch up, lined up again, and set off once more.
When they reached the end they were greeted by a big bowl of berries and wildflowers mixed with honey. The winning badger had a garland of flowers placed on it's head, which it promptly ate. They fey seemed satisfied at this conclusion, petting the badgers and cooing at them. Tabitha ventured that it was possible that the fey did not know one badger from  another and that the whole exercise may have been entirely pointless. No one disagreed.
The finale was Kruin, standing in the middle of the square and challenging any who dared to duel her, while Erika shot up little sparkles behind her.
"Aye, I've had just about enough of this fooling around with fairies and badgers and illusions." snarled Falnil, while the rest of the duskguard looked on. "It's time to show you how it's done in Tsuen"
Kruin and Falnil fight, Kruin wins.
== Sold Loot ==
=== +5 Sickle - Fair Price - 37729.5gc ===
“Rarely, do you come across a weapon of this much power. It can penetrate Demon and Devil skin, it can crack the toughest of dragon scale - it even cuts through adamantite plate like it was butter. It takes months even to forge a weapon like this. But you can walk away with one today”Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
The sickle proved something of a puzzle for historians and fighters alike. Who would make this? Who would have wielded it? The sickle was simple iron with golden runes, and gave nothing away. 
In the end, Mogriss spent 20 minutes casting legend lore from a scroll she’d come across, after everyone agreed to chip in on the cost. The sickle belonged to a druid from the fourth age, who was said to have “planted the Mosswood”. No one knew much about her (and Drusilla wasn’t about to be helpful) but the lore Mogriss recovered was enough that one well dressed human woman elected to purchase the item outright, on behalf of High Lady Teyr’anaric. Fourth age items that are both intact and magical are something of a rarity, and the buyer was sure the High Lady would be able to extract valuable lore from it.
--
=== +1 icy burst heavy flail - Fair Price - 13736.25gc (Halfway between flog and market price) ===
“This Flail was kissed by the Ice Queen of Sithit-kaal, in the ice fields far to the north of the dwarven lands. Its very touch can freeze limbs and shatter heads. If you have problems with fire based creatures, you cannot walk past this flail.”
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
“Seems a bit of a waste to sell this on the day you tell us there are no more fire dragons”
“We found it in the dragon’s horde”
“Well, you shoulda used it on the dragon. It’s practically useless now. Worthless”
“Wait, are you looking to buy it? Is that what this is?”
“Buy this piece of scrap? Mitra have mercy. This is trash. Junk. A waste of good shelf space. Why, a man would be a fool to pay more than 8,000 gold for that”
“12,000”
“Done”
--
=== +1 heavy steel shield - Fair Price - 1170gc (market price, dragon scarred, we can talk it up) ===
“Sir Joffrel the Mighty carried this shield, which is said to have been blessed by Rombadazzle himself, into battle against Agaronak, the Big Red. Since the shield is all that remains of Sir Joffrel, it is clear that luck is indeed on its side”.
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
This sells quickly to a young adventurer. By the end of the night you can hear the brave warrior telling his own story about how he came by it.
--
=== Rod of the Viper -  Fair Price - 14250gc (Half way between flog and market price) ===
For the man who will do everything in his power to take power, this heavy mace is a powerful tool.  It is shunned by paladins and the oh-so-righteous because of its ability to sap the strength from an enemy's body, but in the hands of a realist, a pragmatist, someone who is prepared to take any action to secure victory over the opponents thrown at him by this vicious world, this rod can deliver power.  But I look at you, and you look uncertain.  Maybe this mace is not for you, maybe you don't have the intestinal fortitude for an item of this power.  No matter, would you care to look at our range of more mundane weapons?  Would they suit you better, do you think?
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
It’s unlikely that there would be a buyer for this item, as it functions only for an evil wielder. Nevertheless, a middle-aged half elf with a thick accent inquires about the item. Jaq watches the man carefully, but he does not do anything suspicious, nor flag as evil (although he noticed the detect spell being cast). He wears a set of half-plate decorated with snakes, and a shield with an ouroboros circling it’s edge. When asked about the rod he said only “I happen to be partial to snakes”. He paid in gold in the shape of small statues of men, weighing them out with care. When it was certain that he’d paid the full amount he excused himself, and walked out of town, to the east.
--
=== Rod of Negation - Fair Price - 27750gc (Halfway between flog and market price) ===
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
“'The Equaliser'.  Do you know why we call it that?  When you're trying to make your way in this world there is only so much progress you can make before you run up against some smarmy bastard with an enchanted bracelet or a magic torc or what have you, some item of arcane power which lets him do a better job than you, be it in the field of battle or in the tool shop, or even in the bedroom.  Magic items.  It's not about skill, it's not about hard work, it's not about preparation, it's about who has the most money to throw around, or who inherited the best heirloom, or who married a trained wizard and had them manufacture this unfair advantage for them.  You, I know this by looking at you, you are a man of great talent, but you haven't achieved the recognition or reward a man of your skill deserves, and it's because there's always some fucker with a magic item giving him a leg-up.  And that's why we call this rod 'The Equaliser' - because with it, you can neutralise that cheat's edge and prove once and for all that your years of training and late nights honing your skills and all the sacrifices you made result in better product than any fop with a magic item can ever produce.”
“I only have 20,053 gp. Please sell it to me. I’ll show him. I’ll show him and his fancy fucking magic carpet. ‘Let me show you the world’ indeed you skinny asscrumpet. Let’s see who’s laughing when you’re falling from your useless buttrag! ME. I WILL LAUGH.
I promise not to kill anyone”
--
=== A fancy cloak of silver wolf fur - Fair price - 400gc (worth 300gc) ===
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
“Mirrax, let me tell you about the hunt. The hunt which brought down this beautiful wolf was glorious indeed.  Tanitha the Huntress - that was her name - and she had tracked the silver-”
“DON’T CARE MINE NOW. Mmmm, the warm fluffyness of dead things.”
--
=== A calendar from the fourth age embellished with turquoise - Fair Price - 1000gc (worth 800gp) ===
The Fourth Age ... I mean the very words conjure up days of wonder, of greatness, but also of melancholy, of loss, of great globe-spanning grief.  This calendar literally counts those days.  Have you seen a calendar so well appointed as this one, inlaid with turquoise, such great craftsmanship, such attention to detail?  Calendars from our unfortunate days are not so beautiful to look upon, for who now wants to celebrate the passage of time when all it does is distance us from such past greatness?  But in the Fourth Age ... Sure, there was hardship then as well, but also hope, also proximity to the unimaginable greatness of the Third Age.  And clearly someone from then wished to gaze upon the passage of time with love and with joy.  For historians this is of significance, of course, but when I look at this gorgeous calendar I don't see something to be read by dusty librarians and never appreciated for its beauty, its artistry.  No!  I see the sort of wall hanging or glass table inlay that makes your guests swoon in the mere presence of a Fourth Age artifact, I see an item that shows that even in this blighted time there are still some in our community who are close to the greatness of the Fourth Age.
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
After a lot of arguing with Kendra, Uldman is eventually permitted to buy this. He seems enthusiastic about the design on the calendar, and a small pair turquoise which can be slid around to simulate the movement of the sun and the phases of the moon. He carefully demonstrates that the slider for the moon is shaped oddly, with the section marked for the waning moon showing more wear than any other phase. He finds a stick and starts drawing diagrams on the ground and saying things like “waxing gibbous”, “Anomalistic Months”, and something about the “Saros cycle”. Within minutes, he is surrounded by a cloud of Tsarian scholars who seem intent on keeping him talking. Kendra takes the remaining money and heads towards the nearest bowyer.
--
=== An ornate oaken staff - Fair Price - 1250gc (worth 1000gc) ===
This staff was a peace offering between the elvish and dwarvish peoples, sometime during the 4th age. The wood represents the elvish people, the worked stone - the dwarvish. The staff itself shows they can work together.
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
The staff is indeed from the 4th age, but bears nothing hinting at it’s origins. Neither its ornamentation nor its quality are enough to find a buyer
--
=== A silver flask etched with snowflake patterns - Fair Price - 1000gc (worth 700 gp) ===
Ah, 'the Flask of the Frozen North'!  The great artifact that never was!  A tale is told that Gazaro the Orcish Sorcerer pilfered this from the dwarves of Dezin-Khud who made their kingdom beneath the extensive snow plains of the northlands, intending to invest it with his orcish arcana such that it would warm the blood of all who drank from it, enabling his horde-mates to storm into their hated foes' underground realm.  Alas for him, but fortunately for the dwarves, Gazaro was slain by an elven arrow before he made it back to his people.  It may not be magical in the conventional sense, but for the elves, it is a perfect way to remind the dwarves of one of the few times that the elves, albeit accidentally, saved an entire dwarven people from being overrun by orcs.
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
This item serves to illustrate that the Dalish are absolutely rubbish at geography. Talisa is asked at least a dozen times that day whether this is "a north" and if indeed "it is frozen". Agamemnon, the resident expert on the intersection between dwarves/elves and orcs handles this wonderfully. Yes there is a north. Yes, we're in the southern hemisphere but you can get there eventually. Yes, it is as cold as a daffodil's tear. No, I don't know what that means but am I right in guessing it has to do with genetals? Good man.
The flask sells out of embarrassment.
--
=== A silver-plated steel gorget chased with stellar designs - Fair Price - 100gc (worth 75 gp) ===
Sometime in the 4th age, the Archmage Sharkik had this item commissioned. He possessed a great wisdom, and realised that his demise wasn't likely to come from a battle with a lich, but from something more mundane like an assassins wire. It is said that some of the Archmages wisdom has rubbed off on the gorget - clearly only wise people would consider purchasing it after all.
Sharers: Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
"This...this is just a gorget. For 750 silver"
"Well, if you're not clever enough to appreciate art, then I'm afraid this is not for you. I doubt any of your friends would even know what a sharkiquian piece looked like"
"Shows what you know. This would look lovely on my mantelpiece next to my other shargiquies. Take your money, philistine, and good day to you"
--
=== A simple platinum ring with a vine motif - Fair Price - 100gc (worth 60 gp) ===
See the intricacy with which this vine motif is engraved?  It is delicate, it is fine, it is precise ... but do you know what species of plant this is?  I do not.  Nor does anyone I have yet encountered.  Rumour has it that he who can identify this vine can trace the ring back to its owner.  Who knows what reward such a conscientious person might receive from someone of such wealth as to value the return of an heirloom this fine?
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
This item gets stolen with astonishing speed, the platinum must have caught someone's eye.  
--  
=== A set of spice jars made from hammered gold - Fair Price - 5000 (worth 4000 gp) ===
These spice jars are Fourth Age, no question.  The number of jars is the give-away - obviously this is a complete set, but spice sets in our age tend to be much larger than this.  Why?  Do we think that in the Fourth Age they had less spices, or less trade?  I see you laughing - of course not, you understand.  The Fourth Age reached for greatness, strove to recapture the glory of the Third Age, and these spice jars are a reflection of that.  Now we collect spices like they are pebbles on the shore, but then, ah!  Then tastes were more refined.  The lady of the household would gather only the finest, most apt flavours to complement the refined palate of her husband and her guests, and so only these many spice jars were required, these many sensations exactly would demonstrate the skill of the cook and the delicate, refined appreciation of the lady.  Sure, you could toss handfuls of different spices into a stew until you can no longer taste the vegetables in it, and that's okay, I guess - I mean, it gets the job done.  But it's so ... unrefined.  To use just these many spices and to bring out the true flavour of the food with them ... well, that was what the Fourth Age was all about.  When you see this, with its hammered gold and its centuries of life, you know that the house in which you find yourself is a refined one indeed.
Sharers: Castle, Shades (Hanabi), Shnooks, Jaq, Aggy, Mort (Tabitha), Killy (RIP), Kruin
A proud looking gnome from Tsar was holding a string bag, overflowing with the drerky he'd purchased earlier in the day. He then proceeded to purchase these spice jars, and stuff them with jerky, and stuff the whole lot into his string bag.
To quote Jaq, and by extension Muir, "To help one's fellow man is a noble act; for you are as strong as two. There will always be those beyond your loving grace, and you must shed no tear for them"
--
=== Banana of Holding - Fair price 3,000gc (1,200gc flog price - Inflated the price here, because I figure being able to hide valuables in a *banana* makes them pretty safe) ===
If you've ever struggled to find a really safe hiding spot for any of your valuables, then struggle no further! Who in their right mind would look for your family jewels in a *banana*?
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Mort, Killingsworth, Kruin, Jaq
The people who find this item hilarious and the people who can actually afford it seem to represent two mutually exclusive groups. Plenty of people have suggestions on how it could be used, from safely storing documents to hiding money from bandits. Sadly, the people who worry about bandits and the people who care about banana jokes are not those with enough coin to afford it. It doesn't sell.
--
=== 2x Silver Plated Wooden Coins - Fair Price - 10gc each (Negotiable) ===
This should be of interest to any intellectuals out there. These are used as currency amongst intelligent apes. Take one home, divine it, learn about other cultures hidden beneath the surface.
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Mort, Killingsworth, Kruin, Jaq
Once their authenticity has been confirmed, a Tsarian scholar buys both.
--
=== Nice Looking Rock - Fair Price - 75gc (Negotiable) ===
This unassuming piece of rock is actually a Relic from the Monkey God Screeee. It offers you protection against flung poo, lets you locate bananas by smell and gives you interesting powers in the bedroom. This is the only one in existence, so snap it up fast
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Mort, Killingsworth, Kruin, Jaq
This is a tough sell. It's just a rock, and there's only so much you can say about a rock. At the end of the day it's established that the rock would sell better in the Sand Jungles, where rocks are harder to come by. It remains unsold
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=== 3x Sort of Nice Looking Rocks - Fair Price - 20gc each (Negotiable) ===
These are shards, taken from a statue dedicated to the Monkey God Screeee, located deep in the bowels of RA. Items like these are likely never to see the light of day again, so get in quick!
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Mort, Killingsworth, Kruin, Jaq
It would later turn out that Talisa did not even put these on display.
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=== 7x Desiccated Beetles - Fair Price - 2.5gc each (Negotiable) ===
Beetles are known to be a delicacy amongst the intelligent monkey races in RA. Try one if you dare
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Mort, Killingsworth, Kruin, Jaq
A stout looking orc woman drops 127 silver coins on the table before picking up all seven beetles, shoving them in her mouth and chewing loudly, all the time never breaking eye contact with Talisa. When she was done the orc belched loudly and strode off into the crowd, while Talisa pulled a dessicated bug leg off her face, wondering if she'd just been threatened or hit on.
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=== 1 metric unit of Evil Temple stuff - Fair Price - 750gc (Halfway between Flog and Market Price) ===
Real, authentic temple decorations from deep in RA. Feel free to buy it either piecemeal or all together. Just be sure to keep them somewhere safe, lest Orcus use them to look in on you.
Sharers - Castle, Mort, Jaq, Aggy, Shades, Kruin, Killy
It's soon clear that these items are doing more harm to the sales process than good. Orcus is still a bad name to hear, and people clearly don't like seeing clearly evil objects around.
They do not sell, although Maya offers you 350gc to find a buyer in the Dales.
--
=== Super Teapot of Death and Value (A regular teapot once owned by the Spymaster of Orcus) - Fair Price 100gc ===
This teapot was left behind by the Spymaster of Orcus, during our last encounter with her. This is the genuine thing. If you feel the need for any others of her items, let us know. We'll take them when we destroy her viper pit.
Sharers - Castle, Kruin, Jaq, Mort, Aggy, Shades, Killy
Sometimes you make mistakes. This teapot is bought immediately by a thoughtful looking halfling lady who asks you to wrap it in cloth. Midway through, a half-elvish man comes up starts arguing with her, then the half-elf's wife joins in, then the halfling's husband.
Words come to blows and by the time the watch has shown up, the have to arrest the half-elf and confiscate his crossbow. 
Apparently the teapot was "obviously" a rare casting by a forgotten Tsathoggan high priest, and the halfling and the elf were the only two living people left in the Valley who were cognizant of that fact. Still, knowing you deprived Helayna of her priceless relic may bring some comfort.
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=== Staff of Transmutation - Fair Price - 61,500gc (Halfway between Flog and Market Price) ===
Is your significant other lacking certain required features? Does it actually count as beastiality if they started off as human? Wish you could turn your mother-in-law into an actual pitbull? If you are plagued by any of these questions then this Staff of Transmutation might just be for you!
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Aggy, Killy, Mort, Jaq, Kruin
Some people really, really like baleful polymorph. Baleful and Disintegrate together in one item is all you need if you're pretty sure that your foe has a bad fort save. This is bought by an adventuring party, who are in possession of a rogue who is a prodigy at using magical items, and a wizard who is capable of recharging it. The party are businesslike and unfriendly, and in spite of their purchase they probably do more harm to the fair than good. Shades makes a note to not invite them to anything ever again.
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=== Ring of Pure Form - Fair Price - 75,000gc (Halfway between Flog and Market Price) ===
Are witches, warlocks and mothers-in-law a problem in your life? Fear no longer, for this ring is proof against shapechange. This item is incredibly rare, you won't get another chance once this fair is over.
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Aggy, Killy, Mort, Jaq, Kruin
This doesn't even come close to selling. A person who may or may not be some guy who knows a guy who knows Bristleback maybe does make an offer, but the craft of the ring exceeds it's function, and it's clear that no one who'd want it would be in a position to afford it. Maya believes that it may find a buyer elsewhere, and offers 21,000gp to ship it to the Dales.  
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=== Obsidian Steed - Fair Price - 21,375gc - (Halfway between Flog and Market Price) ===
I shouldn't tell you this, but the steed's name is ... Ptereton.  You don't recognise the name?  That's probably for the best, pray forget I said anything.  All I will say is that the steed is unusually intelligent.  When you do wake him ... well, like I said, if you do not recognise this name from the annals of history, it doesn't matter.  I'm surprised, honestly - perhaps his great name is not as well remembered in this part of the world - but even without knowing of his past deeds and his place in the annals of our age he is still a valuable acquisition.  But ... you've really never heard that name before?  I really am so surprised.
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Aggy, Killy, Mort, Jaq, Kruin
"Oddly, no one makes these anymore. Apparently a law was passed many centuries ago describing them as "useful only as the tools of evil" and "sin, given form". Crazy huh? It's just an evil plane shifting horse. Wizards right, they think they know what's right and wrong! But they're just spellcasters! That doesn't give them any insight into objective morality! Knowing about the planes is no substitute for knowing about the human condition, I tell you.
Yeah, just wrap it up. I got someone I have to visit.
--
=== Brazier of Fire Elemental Summoning - Fair Price - 75,000 (Half way between Flog and Market Price) ===
Oh, this?  It does have a name, but ... No, it is quite a powerful name, quite an old name, one imbued with deep energy.  It is unsettling for most people to hear it said, those without truly great willpower and strength of character can feel nauseous at the unnatural sound of it, at the magic of the syllables of its true name, so I am reluctant to speak it here.  You're sure you want to hear it?  Very well; there is a chair here if you need to sit down afterwards.  It is called ... 'Bar'at kzz Izzthakt broo Thathatax'.  Are you okay?  You don't feel at all ill or physically or psychically assaulted?  I am impressed.  Very impressed.  There are not many people strong enough in themselves to be around so deeply resonant an item as this brazier.  Hmmm ... perhaps we have found a home for this ancient item after all.  I never thought we would.  Maybe we could come to an arrangement ...
Sharers - Castle, Shades, Aggy, Killy, Mort, Jaq, Kruin
Turns out you can only make these on the plane of fire. This is very quickly bought by a wizard in red robes, who is carrying a staff decorated with symbols for fire, topped with an everburning flame. You have a suspicion that she has a thing going on.
--
=== Vacuous Grimoire - Fair Price - 2,000gc ===
Do you have a friend who never returns your books? A pesky neighbour who likes to leaf through your illustrated manuals of female anatomy? Get your revenge* with this Vacuous Grimoire!
*We are not responsible for any damage caused through either the proper or improper use of this item
Shares - Castle, Shades, Laniss, Mort, Kruin
This doesn't go well at all. Apologies are made, wounds are healed and you permanently lose the goodwill of a noble family. At Laniss' urging, this book is placed in a leadbound box. The curse on it is just too smart.
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=== Mundane Small Goblin Dagger x8- Fair Price - 25gc. ===
Take a piece of Rappan Athuk home with these authentic Goblin pigstickers! Recently liberated from the scum that raid our villages and threaten our peace. No use for a dagger? You're not thinking hard enough! Stick notes to your kitchen cupboards, teach your son to throw deadly weapons or even use one to pick your teeth!
Shares - Castle, Kruin, Laniss, Mort, Shades, Killy
These all go without question. They will probably see use as trophies, display pieces or sidearms for a certain kind of young noble. You're paid in gold coins though, so it's worth it.