Field Trip

==Characters==
* Nat Peterson
* Shubie 
* Susie
* Nancy Suzy Fish 
* Mabel 
* Evelyn 
* Isabel 
* Shelly 
* Taylor 
* Tyler 
* Small Billy 
* Tall Billy 
* Monroe 
* Tommy 
* Sally 
* Martha Smith
* Nazz-Mimi
* Sally's Daughter 
* Debbie Rechid 
* Bus Driver 
* Foodcourt Cashier 
* Museum Security Guard 
==Transcript==
(Scene cuts to Nat and Shubie parking their boat in the parking lot outside of Bikini Bottom Elementary)
Nat: "Ugh, parent-teacher conferences are always so boring."
Shubie: "Tell me about it." Nat and Shubie get out of their boat and walk over towards the school entrance. Nat notices Nancy walking towards the entrance as well. Nat waves at Nancy.
Nat: "Hi Nancy!"
Nancy: "Hey Nat! Hey Shubie! Aren't you excited for parent-teacher conferences? I love hearing about how well Isabel is doing in school!" Nat, Shubie and Nancy enter Bikini Bottom Elementary and walk over to Mabel's classroom where Martha Smith, Nazz-Mimi and Sally are sitting in three of the desks.
Mabel: "Welcome to parent-teacher conferences. Please have a seat at one of the desks until all of the other parents arrive. We're trying a new thing this year where the teachers just talk to all the parents at once instead of each one individually. It'll be much less time consuming." Nancy, Shubie and Nat sit down next to each other at three of the desks. Evelyn walks into the room and sits down at a desk towards the back.
Evelyn: "Sorry I'm late." Martha rolls her eyes.
Martha: "As if she's ever on time."
Mabel: "Ok that's everyone. Let's begin."
Shubie: "Wait, is this really all of the parents of the kids in this class?"
Mabel: "Well Shelly's parents didn't show up again and I'm also the mother of three of the nine kids in this class so yes."
Sally: "Ten! Three of the ten! There's ten kids in this class."
Mabel: "Oh yeah, right."
Shubie: "There's only ten kids in this class?! Wow, I never realized how small this town really is."
Mabel: "Are you done blabbering now? Yes it's a really small class. Moving on. Most of your children are doing really well in this class. My Billy has an A+, Isabel has an A, Sally's daughter has an A-, Monroe and Tommy have a B+, Susie has a B, Evelyn's Billy has a B-, Tyler has a C+, Taylor has a C-, and Shelly has a D."
Nancy: "Isabel's not at the top of her class? Oh no that could ruin her chances of going to Whale!" Mabel rolls her eyes.
Mabel: "Oh that must be so heartbreaking for you. Well at least my son Billy will be getting into Stanfjord. Anyway, we are having a field trip tomorrow to the local museum and we need at least two parents to volunteer as chaperones."
Nazz: "I have a doctor's appointment."
Martha: "I have to work at my pickle store."
Sally: "I'm going to be finishing my teleport machine tomorrow."
Shubie: "Why do you need people to help you watch ten kids?" Nancy raises her hand.
Nancy: "Me and Shubie will do it!"
Shubie: "What?!"
Nancy: "Come on Shubie, this will be a great way help our children since they're struggling in school right now."
Shubie: "They're not struggling. Isabel has an A and Susie has a B. Those are fine grades."
Nancy: "But she should have an A+ and come on Shubie, you and I both know that a B is not a good grade. If Isabel ever got a B in school, I wouldn't let her play with her friends for a month."
Shubie: "Why can't Evelyn be a chaperone? She doesn't even have a job and her son is doing worse than both of our kids!"
Evelyn: "That's no way to talk to your sister! I try very hard! Plus, I already signed up for my daily appointment at the spa tomorrow so I can't do it."
Mabel: "I still need one more parent to volunteer or the kids can't go."
Nat: "I can't take off of work tomorrow. Sadie's Cookies only has two employees."
Nancy: "Think of all the great things our children will learn at the museum, Shubie." Shubie sighs.
Shubie: "Fine. I'll do it."
Mabel: "Excellent. You both need to be here by 9 tomorrow."
(Scene cuts to Shubie driving Susie to school the next day)
Shubie: "So are you excited about your field trip to the museum today, Susie?"
Susie: "Not really. Museums are boring." Shubie stops at a red light.
Shubie: "Oh don't be such a Debbie downer." Debbie drives up next to them.
Debbie: "Hey!"
Shubie: "Sorry. I'm sure you'll have a lot of fun, Susie. I can't wait to see all of the cool things they have there."
Susie: "Wait, you're coming as a chaperone?"
Shubie: "Yes! Your teacher said at the parent-teacher conference last night that she needed two chaperones to help her today so I volunteered." Shubie pulls into the school parking lot, and her and Susie walk into the bus that is parked in front of the school.
Nancy: "Come sit back here Shubie! Oops! I mean, Mrs. Peterson!" Shubie sits in the back of the bus next to Nancy. Mabel walks onto the bus holding a cup of coffee.
Mabel: "Sorry I'm late class. There was a massive line at the coffee shop this morning. You all have your seatbelts fastened, right? I'll assume that you do because I don't feel like coming around to check."
Shubie: "Susie, put your seatbelt on." Susie puts on her seatbelt.
Mabel: "Is everyone here? Ok driver, start the bus!" Mabel sits down and the driver starts the bus. Sally parks her boat next to the bus.
Sally: "Wait! Wait! My daughter isn't on the bus yet!" Shubie notices Sally's boat parked next to the bus.
Shubie: "Hey wait! Sally's daughter isn't on the bus! Shouldn't we wait for her?" Mabel turns around.
Mabel: "Huh? What was that, Shubie?"
Shubie: "Don't leave yet! Sally's daughter isn't on the bus!"
Mabel: "What? I can't you hear over this loud engine. Tell me when we get to the museum. Ok driver, we're all ready. You can start driving now." The bus drives away.
(Scene cuts to the bus on its way to the museum)
Mabel: "Today we will be going on a field trip to the museum class. Make sure you thank Mrs. Peterson and Mrs. Fishbowl for coming along with us as chaperones!" The kids give Shubie and Nancy a round of applause.
Nancy: "I'm so excited for this field trip! I can't wait to teach Isabel all about the history of Bikini Bottom so she can ace the entrance exam at Whale! But don't worry, it'll be helpful for Susie too when she goes to Bikini Bottom Community College."
Shubie: "Yeah... You know there are a lot of other schools Susie can go to though. It isn't like her only options are community college and Whale."
Nancy: "Yeah but let's face it, almost all of these kids will go to community college just like almost everyone did back when we were kids. You were just lucky enough to be really good at softball so you didn't have to go to community college like me and Frank and Nat and almost everyone else in high school." The bus stops.
Driver: "We're here!" Shubie looks at her watch.
Shubie: "What?! We've only been on the bus for two minutes! I could've just driven here instead of parking at the school and taking the bus." Mabel shrugs. All of the kids get off the bus, followed by Nancy, Shubie and Mabel.
Mabel: "Ok I'll take the A group: Small Billy, Monroe and Tommy. Nancy will have the B group: Isabel, Tall Billy and Tyler. And finally Shubie will take the C group: Susie, Shelly and Taylor. Now let's all take our groups and split up. We'll meet back here at 2. Oh, and here are the scavenger hunts the museum gave us. Whichever group finds all 20 items first will win um..." Mabel looks in her purse.
Mabel: "The four lollipops in my purse!"
Nancy: "Competitive thinking is a huge part of Whale's admission test! This scavenger hunt will be perfect for Isabel!"
Shubie: "Why are we taking these kids on a scavenger hunt? Wouldn't it be much better if we actually taught them history?"
Mabel: "You have a lot to learn, Shubie. These kids will get bored visiting a museum all day. This scavenger hunt will keep them entertained and make it less likely that they'll act up." Shubie takes a scavenger hunt from Mabel and walks away.
Shubie: "Susie, Taylor and Shelly! You guys are with me!"
Shelly: "Ugh, why do I always get stuck with the boring mom on field trips?" Shubie, Susie, Taylor and Shelly walk into the museum.
Shubie: "So what would you like to see first? We could go to the medieval exhibit, or the Viking exhibit or the Old West exhibit."
Shelly: "Or we could just go to the arcade." Shelly points at the arcade room.
Shubie: "Why would a museum have an arcade? A museum should be a place that teaches history not a place to hang out and play video games. Let's go somewhere else so we can actually learn something like we're supposed to today."
Taylor: "Let's go to the Caveman exhibit!"
Shubie: "Really? Out of all the time period based exhibits you want to go to the one that has nothing from the scavenger hunt and where fish sat around all day and rubbed sticks together?" Taylor nods his head. Shubie shrugs and leads her group to the Caveman exhibit.
Shubie: "Look kids! It’s a re-enactment of when fishkind first discovered how to create fire!" Shelly walks over to another part of the exhibit that has the skeleton of a huge prehistoric fish.
Shelly: "Woah! Hey Susie! Come climb this with me!"
Susie: "Um, I don't think we're supposed to climb that."
Shelly: "Oh come on, don't be such a dweeb." Shelly starts climbing the skeleton. Shubie walks over to another part of the exhibit.
Shubie: "Hey look at this cave painting! Guys? Guys? Where did they go?" Shubie turns around and sees Shelly climbing up the skeleton.
Shubie: "Oh no! Shelly get down from there this instant! You're not allowed to climb up there!" Shelly climbs down from the skeleton.
Shubie: "Don't ever do that again or else we'll get kicked out of this place."
Shelly: "But I wasn’t gonna get caught! The guard is asleep over there!"
Shubie: "I don't care. We are not ruining this museum." Shelly sighs.
Shelly: "Fine." Shubie takes her group out of the caveman exhibit and into the Viking exhibit.
Shubie: "Wow! Check out those huge ships the Vikings made! That's one item found on the scavenger hunt! I can't believe these things used to be able to hold one hundred warriors!" Shubie checks to Viking ship off the scavenger hunt. Taylor walks over to another part of the exhibit that has a Viking helmet.
Taylor: "That looks so cool." Taylor grabs the helmet and puts it on his head.
Shubie: "Hey come look at this. These are the flaming shield contests that Vikings used to play all the time. Isn't that cool?" Shubie looks down at the kids and sees Taylor wearing the Viking helmet.
Shubie: "Taylor! Take that helmet off this instant and put it back where it belongs! We're not allowed to touch stuff that belongs to the museum! Come on let's go to the medieval exhibit before anyone notices that you were wearing a priceless artifact." Shubie takes her group to the medieval exhibit.
Shubie: "Hey this fish looks like Patty Rechid! And that one looks just like Mrs. Rechid! And this one looks just like you, Taylor! Taylor? Don't you think this fish looks like you?" Shubie looks down and doesn't see Taylor.
Shubie: "Oh no, where did he go now?" Shubie looks around and sees Taylor trying to lift up a sword. Shubie runs towards him.
Shubie: "Taylor put that down!" Shubie grabs the sword from Taylor and puts it back.
Shelly: "Hey what does this do?" Shubie turns around and sees Shelly playing with a guillotine.
Shubie: "Shelly!" Shubie runs over to Shelly and grabs her before a blade chops off her head.
Taylor: "Hey look it's a catapult!" Shubie turns around and sees Taylor climbing into the catapult.
Shubie: "Taylor, no!" Shubie runs over to the catapult, grabs Taylor and gets him out of the catapult before it launches.
Shubie: "These things are not toys!" Shelly walks over to a suit of armor.
Shelly: "I wanna try it on!" Shelly tries to climb into the knight armor but Shubie grabs her.
Shubie: "That's it! You two have been nothing but trouble the whole day! Stop this right now or I'll put you back on the bus for the rest of the day! Do you understand? I'm not letting you ruin the museum!"
Shelly: "Ok, ok, we get it. Jeez you don't have to yell so much." Shubie let's go of Shelly and Taylor and looks at her watch.
Shubie: "Well it's almost 12 now. Let's go get some lunch at the food court. Hopefully you guys will be better behaved after that."
(Scene cuts to Shubie, Susie, Shelly and Taylor ordering food at the food court) Taylor walks over to the burger stand.
Cashier: "Would you like a burger?"
Taylor: "Does it come in raspberry?"
Cashier: "Uh, no."
Taylor: "Blueberry?"
Cashier: "Nope, it doesn't come in blueberry either."
Taylor: "Raspberry?" The cashier sighs. Nancy and her group walk into the food court.
Nancy: "Hurry up and get some food kids! We only have one item left on the scavenger hunt!" Nancy sits down next to Shubie.
Nancy: "So how's your group been doing with the scavenger hunt? My group has already found 19 items! We just have this one coin looking thing left to find."
Shubie: "Um, well... My group has found one item so far."
Nancy: "One?! Oh Shubie, this is exactly why your daughter's going to community college while mine's going to Whale."
Shubie: "What has been up with you today? Why do you keep talking so much about Whale? Our daughters aren't even in middle school yet let alone high school! Don't you think that you're focusing on this a little too early?"
Nancy: "Oh Shubie, you have a lot to learn. If you want your children to get into a good college and have a bright future, you need to groom them for it at a young age. It's not like they're just going to wake up one day and want to do that themselves especially with kids like Susie holding them back."
Shubie: "Kids like Susie?! You don't think that my daughter has what it takes to become successful? Well I'll show you! My group's gonna win that scavenger hunt and prove to you than anyone can become successful regardless of what snooty college they went to!" Nancy laughs.
Nancy: "Your group is going to find 19 items before my group finds one? Ha! Good luck with that!" Nancy laughs and walks away.
(Scene cuts to Shubie, Susie, Taylor and Shelly walking around the museum) Shubie looks at her watch.
Shubie: "We still have an hour and thirty minutes left. That's more than enough time to find all the items on the scavenger hunt."
Shelly: "Can't you just cross off all the items without us actually looking for any of them?"
Shubie: "No Shelly, that would be cheating and I'm not a cheater. Don't you want those lollipops your teacher said she'd give us if we win?" Shelly shrugs.
Shelly: "I guess so."
Shubie: "Good. Now let's try to find those items!" Shubie and her group walk into the revolution exhibit.
Taylor: "Hey there's the cannon!"
Susie: "And that's the flag!"
Shelly: "Aren't those the pointy gun thingies?"
Shubie: "You mean the bayonets? Very good group! We've already found three items! Only sixteen more to go!"
(Scene cuts to a montage of Shubie, Susie, Taylor and Shelly finding a bunch of the items on the scavenger hunt)
Susie: "That's the cowboy hat!"
Shubie: "Excellent! We only have one item left to find and it's that weird coin looking thing! Now where could it be?"
Taylor: "Maybe it's in the arcade."
Shubie: "That's silly. Why would they put something from the arcade in here? It has to be in one of the exhibits." Shubie and her group walks around the corner and into the medieval exhibit. Nancy and her group walks past them.
Nancy: "Out of the way Shubie! My group has a scavenger hunt to win!"
Shubie: "Well so does mine!"
Nancy: "Oh, are you on your third item now?"
Shubie: "Nope. We're on the twentieth."
Nancy: "Well it doesn't matter. My group will still find the last item first and win!"
Shubie: "I wouldn't be so sure of that." Nancy and her group walks away.
Shubie: "Come on guys we have to win this! Where's the one place we haven't looked yet?"
Shelly: "The arcade!"
Shubie: "You really think it's in the arcade? But what would an arcade have that would look like this?" Shelly rolls her eyes.
Shelly: "Oh I don't know, maybe a token!"
Shubie: "A token?" Shubie looks at the photo more closely and sees the word token written on the coin. Shubie gasps.
Shubie: "It is a token!" 
Shelly: "Told you so." Shubie looks at her watch.
Shubie: "Oh no! We only have five minutes before we have to get back on the bus! Let's get to the arcade as fast as we can!" Shubie and her group sprint towards the arcade.
Shubie: "We're here!" Shubie sees Billy, Monroe and Tommy playing in the arcade while Mabel is sleeping in a chair in the corner. Shubie walks over to Mabel.
Shubie: "Your group has been in the arcade this whole time?!" Mabel wakes up.
Mabel: "Huh? What are you doing here?! And I figured I might as well take a day off and let my kids have fun while the other mothers actually teach their kids something for once. You don't know how stressful it is being a teacher!"
Shubie: "I had to miss work today and take these kids on a tour around the museum because you wanted a day off?! If your job is so stressful then get a different one! And here! We finished the scavenger hunt so we want our prizes now!"
Mabel: "The what? Oh yeah, that." Mabel hands each of them a lollipop. Shelly unwraps her lollipop.
Shelly: "Why does mine have hair on it?" Mabel shrugs.
Mabel: "Those things have been sitting in my purse for years. Now let's get back on the bus and go home."
(Scene cuts to Shubie sitting next to Nancy with a lollipop in her mouth on the way back to the school)
Nancy: "Wow Shubie. You and Susie actually beat me and Isabel in that scavenger hunt today. Maybe your daughter does have a chance at getting into Whale after all."
Shubie: "Thanks but that wasn't really my point. My point was that any of these kids can accomplish their goals as long as they're determined and try hard." Nancy laughs.
Nancy: "You're funny Shubie! As if any of these blockheads have a chance at getting into Whale like our daughters do!" Shubie rolls her eyes and sighs.
(Scene ends)
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