Pro Postal - Monday - Reupload

Pro Postal - Monday - Reupload is the first episode in the Pro Postal subseries. 
== Synopsis ==
== Video ==
== Transcript ==
Kids I'm gonna let you in on a little secret
I love postal 2, the sequel to the 1997
Isometric ish mass murder simulator from the insane but dedicated running with scissors
You may see some other people on YouTube played it, but those people are rookies
Shut up, you fuck
Don't say that kitty you race this asshole. What a fuckin name. I've been played this game since like 2000 of four
I remember reading about this game this insane open-world FPS game
I read about how you can pee on people I was sold postal to is a hilariously Buckey stupidly fun
Unfiltered ultra violent cartoon about this guy the postal dude and his adventures in the town of Paradise, Arizona
I want to show you this game from the perspective of a postal veteran
This is how I personally play postal 2 and it's just the best way to enjoy it in my opinion and nowadays with the updated
Steam release that includes not just all the mission packs
but also roughly 10 bazillion more weapons to play with it's the best version of a true Titan of trash and
Unapologetic Bastion to bad taste. Let's get this ball rolling and start the game
Your bitch wife wants you to run some errands but that's got a secondary to how I play this game
See first you got to get some tools
Tools you start at your trailer and then from there you can pick up a shovel and so you can break into your neighbor's house
And pick up the Kevlar they have also a Taser some gasoline. There's ways to play this game without killing anyone
Good luck with that. That's that's not fun
Health Pipes
You'll also pick up health pipes which are cracked pipes they're crack pipes right around the starting area in this game
You can probably find about five of these crack pipes. What I usually do is I go to the dealer around the corner, right?
I never have a hundred give them at the beginning of the game, but I do have a machine gun
so I kill him take his drugs kill his on the friend of the bedroom and then take his drugs now that you have your
Basic inventory. It's time for your first mission get arrested
Hey mister Peep Show zip up your pants
That's the ticket your pants up
That's it you're under arrest I'm going to have to cuff you you have the right to remain silent
Police Station
What you gotta do is you get arrested and you escape from your cell you go up to the locker room in the police station
Steal yourself a police uniform and you just throw that on and you can get away with anything. This is gonna be sweet. I
Am the law
Police Armory
Also, once you have the police uniform you can rate the police armory
They got some pretty good stuff in there some useful items ammo grenades a stick of TNT
Sure
once you've done with that it's on to mission to
Acquire crack when I play postal 2 I make sure to get to dude addicted to crack as soon as I can get a pipe
Smoke it. And by the time that dude is bitching about withdrawal have another one ready
This can't be good for me, but I feel great
On the medium to hard difficulties. I've been able to keep the Jude high for the entire five days
Just like God intended mission 3 clean up the streets
Yeah, we should fork at your paycheck so the dude works at running with scissors very matter right but
Get Your Paycheck
Yeah, okay
I'm not against protesting but I ever gets protesting violent video games
Just because it's dumb and violent video games didn't turn me into a fucking psychopath. There we go to play some of that down
Im Done
Nothing personal man, but you're fired no that set of done fucking big game studios don't care about the little guy anymore
Who's with me come on everyone follow me?
I
Think I'll need to keep an eye out for these folks. They're definitely hazardous to my health
I Found Him
Yeah, I just found him like this
It's tragedy weird how the murder rate in this town is going up about 5,000 percent in the last hour or so
I haven't cashed my paycheck yet, but I have covered some money. So I'm gonna go back to the crack dealer. He's back
He's fine. He sells me some crack even though I'm dressed like a cop but I jump on the table
He freaks out about it. So
There's a drug dealer right next to the bank and that's on my way so I see her and that's one of those guys again
Hold on
Hi there
For fast cash in this game. Just kick an ATM. Alright, look at that only one person in line now
Bank Robbery
I've never had that happen. Usually I have to wait behind like six people. It's fucking boring
So I usually just rob the bank, but I guess we could do this legit tonight. Hi there
I'd like to catch this pitiful and embarrassing check, please
This right here is kind of situation where you need a good guy with a gun
Oh
Shut up. Sorry I wasn't even for you guys. I was just you guys they ran past us
This is gonna off god. I'm gonna take my pension away. Hey, you look a little suspicious. Let me see your nametag
no, just
Let me let me read your fucking nametag. Just know
Can't trust them I'm gonna make sure this money is protected
There is no safer place than in fucked of a heavily armed crazy person top floor - shit. I'm uniformed I can do anything
Donuts
Okay now more money more crack that'll work how's it goin about
Goat Milk
Mission six get milk crush the Taliban. I guess all they have is goat milk. Jihad goat milk. This is uh,
Man, when I post this video I'm gonna get thousands of edgy teenagers said to be the peppe's YouTube is gonna shut me down
I mean I have to go to one of those other video sites
We get white supremacist shit on the front page another short line. Lucky me. Hello. And what do you want time there?
That'll be five dollars
Five dollars really this is at most a half gallon of milk and not even good milk. It's goat milk
You want to charge me five bucks for that?
That's one twentieth of a hit on the crack pipe, my friend
And I'm sure I'm not gonna develop a chemical dependency for goat milk. So fuck you and your store apparently smells bad
Yeah, what's that awful stench?
Dog Biscuits
I'm not being racist by saying this guy has ties to the Taliban because it's like an unlimited number of Taliban wives with pistols upstairs
and a lot of a lot of extremist
extremist rhetoric
Can't believe this game exists. Hold on. What is this?
We're going down way down
out I think there's uh
dogs from Hell down here
Hellhounds server aye but I have these here dog biscuits. So I think we give you friends while I go and get that rocket launcher
We're not friends I have been serious miscalculation
Okay, we're gonna try this again I just need to strategically toss these dog biscuits
And so my ass may be chewed by the hounds of hell, but nothing a little crack can't fix okay cool
Now we can all fuck
Seems like a good time to test out this rocket
Outstanding
== Trivia ==
== Behind the Scenes ==
Category:Postal
Category:Pro Postal
Category:Postal 2
Category:Pro Videos