The Fourth Chapter

Entries of a diary, thought to be written by a man, Cain Ventura, who has been reported missing for 3 months. It was found 3 miles deep into a nearby forest. If you have any clues of his whereabouts, please call this number - (800)-///-////.
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January 23rd, 2017
I bought a new diary, mainly to document what I do now. I've been forgetting what I do a lot, so I’d like to keep this as a reminder.
And if anyone ever reads this, I’d like to introduce myself. My name is Cain Ventura. I live with my mother and my older brother, Joseph. We live in a small, desolate, and old house. Our address is [REDACTED], so if you find this journal, please return it!
But if not, I’d like to keep going, for those curious. I’m 29, my brother is 22, and our mother is 54. People never come around to our place unless we get mail. Believe it or not, we have pretty good jobs! Although Joseph might have a better job than me, I don’t mind at all.
The only thing that matters to all three of us is our religion. We do believe in a God, and he talks to us fairly regularly. He asks for sacrifices, and don’t worry, not in the human way. More in the “personal belongings” type of way. 
But, that’s all you need to know about me. Please return this journal! You will know it’s my house as we have a picture of our late father in a picture frame near the door!
January 27th 2017
Joseph finally got a promotion at his job! We were praying for this moment. He’s now an executive at some big tech company. I don’t dabble in tech; it's not really my thing. I work in a wood factory about 5 miles south of our place. I make fairly good money, enough to sustain ourselves and then some. Joseph makes nearly two hundred thousand a year! Most of that money goes to the little tech gadgets he has, groceries, charity, or sacrifices to our God to show our love for him. It's a strange way, indeed, but it’s how we do it. Even weirder, anything we sacrifice is burned over a fire. To be more specific, we light up a bonfire and, while we pray, we throw whatever we are giving into the fire. Weird, I know.
We know he accepts it; we hear words of him being appeased of our sacrifices. Although Joseph is the main provider of our necessities, we split everything to make it fair, and I also give some money out for sacrifice. I have big things ahead of me in the next week or two.
February 5th, 2017
So, I started buying even more books than I did before. Did I ever mention that I really love reading? I’m a very imaginative person, or so I’d like to believe. I also draw a little; I have many notebooks full of doodles and all of that. Anyway, back to the books: I started buying so many books, most of which I don’t even know about or have heard of. I just want some time to kill while I attempt to find a good date. Joseph had a perfect hit. Her name is Sophia. You'd think that she'd find what we do weird, as many others do, but she doesn’t mind it at all. Anyways, Joseph started sacrificing a lot more things than usual. I even heard God thank him for the extra things. He’s never said that to me.
February 14th 2017
Had to send mom to an elderly home. She was getting too much to bear and begged us to do it. Don’t worry mom, I’ll always visit when I can and will always have you in mind.
February 17th 2017
Started doing more work to get more to give to God. I want him to thank me like he did Joseph. I want to give more. God, I promise I will sacrifice more to please you.
February 23rd 2017
Started working a lot more and I was given a massive raise! I now get an extra 5 dollars an hour. The only thing is that I was told I need to keep up the extra overtime. A lot of my fellow co-workers kind of quit on us. I wish them the best, honestly. Anyways, it just means more work for me to do. More for me to earn and less time out of the house, I guess. I’ll be sure to keep myself busy.
February 25th 2017
Yes! I finally gave more than Joseph. I feel happy. Yesterday, he didn’t give all that much, oddly. I wonder what he was doing. He must have been busy, but I did catch him mid-pray. He apologized and began talking about his new found love. That’s all I caught.
February 28th 2017
The lumber company is laying off a lot of people. Either that or a lot of people are quitting - I’m seeing less and less people every week. I’m loyal to my company, though; I make a fair pay for doing nothing but cutting trees and all of that. They've awarded me for my loyalty; it’s been 4 years I’ve worked here now. I’m genuinely happy I've committed for this long. Couldn’t have done it without God.
March 2nd 2017
This fairly cute girl started working here. She is extremely friendly and talks in this soft voice. She works as some kind of storage manager, handling the distribution of supplies and keeping track of them, I’ve been told. Anyways, Joseph has started to get back to giving a lot more, especially to charity. He said his girlfriend also works a fairly good job and gets paid around the same as me. He taught her about our practices and all and she seemed interested. Now she has started giving stuff, and I’m extremely happy about it. I don’t have much time to write, as I’m always busy, so I’ll just jot stuff down whenever I can.
March 9th 2017
I waited exactly a week to write here because things have been up and down this week. That girl I talked about, her name is Rose and she’s 27. She agreed on a date, but she was moved to a different part of the job, so I don’t get to see her during work anymore. We planned a date tomorrow night and I’m so happy about it. She’s genuinely so amazing to me. I’ll update… well, myself on it.
March 11th 2017
She said she found me charming. I was very happy, as I've never had anyone tell me that. I told her about our practices and she said she respects it. She just doesn’t want me to sacrifice her. That was a joke, obviously, but I found it a little ignorant. It's alright, though, we really hit it off! 
I don’t know what’s going on with Joseph. He’s been doing his own thing, focusing on both Sophia and our practices. He keeps giving a lot more than me and it’s really making me jealous. I shouldn’t feel this way, but it just seems God is favoring him and the things he gives. It isn’t fair. I work just as hard as he does and he gets the favor for simply giving more.
April 20th 2017
Everything has been going good with Rose. I think I’ve finally found some sort of peace. Screw the favoritism God's been giving Joseph the past couple of months. I’m happy now. I'll write again when something happens. Until then, all I’m focused on is work, Rose, and my religion.
May 17th 2017
What did I do wrong? I gave her most of what I had, all my time, and then more. She still chose to ruin our relationship with some scumbag. Excuse my language, but this isn’t right. I swear she was everything. She cheated and I can’t get over that. I’m in shambles. At least I still have my job and my religion. That's all I care about now. Joseph has grown more distant and God has been more silent on my side. Once again, favoritism.
May 21st 2017
She lied and I lost my job. She told everyone I kept hitting her. This isn’t right, I would never lay my hands on a woman. My mom would be so mad. Speaking of her, she got into some kind of fight and was hospitalized. I was told she wouldn’t make it. But I pray to God every night in hopes she does. She will be okay.
May 25th 2017
I swear Joseph is really just trying his best to one-up me now. He keeps talking about his girlfriend and how he gives more to sacrifice then me. I’m going to do something about this. I will make God favor me.
Tonight, I gave God all I had. He didn’t respect the offering and didn’t accept it. But he did with Joseph. This isn’t fair. It isn’t. 
I’m going to do it.
May 26th 2017
I’ve been planning this all day. I know what I’m doing. At night, I’m going to call him out to the yard and stab him to death. I will.
May 27th 2017
I did it. I called him out to the yard and hid behind a tree near our house. After I called him outside, I stabbed him. 25 times exactly. I counted every single one. It’s just slightly past midnight now. I dealt with everything and hid his body about 15 feet away from the house. God will never know, I promise that.
May 28th 2017
The day went fairly well. I gave my prayers and went to bed. 
Then I woke up around 3 am to screaming. It was loud; I swear I nearly felt my ear shatter. It was God, and he wasn’t happy. “What have you done? Your brother's body cries from the blood ridden dirt!” He screamed at me. I tried explaining myself, but to no avail. “Your punishment will be way more than what man can handle!” He yelled. There was much more, but I simply could not comprehend it; I was met with nothing but fear. I have to run for it. I’m running to the nearby woods in hopes that he doesn’t find me. I know he’s God and all but I have no choice. I don’t want to pay.
I'm sorry, mom. I’m sorry, God.
I’m sorry, Joseph.
///End of text///
Category:Diary/Journal
Category:Mental Illness