Barbie as the Princess and the Pauper/Transcript

Female Narrator: Long ago and far away, in a village high on a mountaintop, something amazing was occurring. At the very same moment, two identical baby girls were born! One, a baby princess.The king and queen were overjoyed. Princess Anneliese would have only the finest. The second baby girl was named Erika. Her parents loved her every bit as much as the king and queen loved the princess, but they worried. They were so poor. How would they be able to care for their little daughter? Many years passed. The princess learned her royal duties, while Erika worked long and hard as a seamstress for the spiteful Madame Carp. With lives so different, it wasn't surprising that the princess and the pauper never met. But fate decreed they would. It all started at the royal mine, where the miners informed the queen the gold had run out. The widowed queen was shocked. The kingdom was now bankrupt. How was she going to take care of her people? If only she could call on her trusted adviser Preminger, but he was away on a long journey. She needed to do something quickly to save the kingdom, but what? And then it struck her. Nearby lived a rich young king who was seeking a wife.
--
Scheduler: Hoo! We're late, late, late! We have twenty, maximum, twenty-two minutes, for your royal fitting! And then it's move, move, move to your speech at the Historical Society! After that we have to rush, and I mean, rush, to the Horticultural Society Tea! Oh, and then there's your math lessons, your geography lessons, your science lessons...
Anneliese: All my life I've always wanted to have one day just for me. Nothing to do and for once nowhere I need to be. With no lessons, lords, or lunches, or 'to do' list in the way. No one to say when to eat or read or leave or stay. That would be the day...
Erika: All my life I've always wanted to have one day for myself. Not waking up with a pile of work on every shelf. With no hems in need of pressing, and no sleeves in disarray. No wedding gown with a thousand stitches to crochet. And no debt to pay.
Bertie: (gasps) Madame Carp!
Madame Carp: What do you think I'm running here? A cabaret?
Erika: I would've said a debtor's prison.
Madame Carp: Keep laughing! You'll be working for me for another thirty-seven years!
Erika: But I've already paid off more than half!
Madame Carp: But there's an interest, isn't there? Your parents should've thought of that before they borrowed so much.
Erika: They did it to feed me!
Madame Carp: Their mistake!
Erika: What would it be like to be...
Anneliese: What would it be like to be... Free
Erika: Free
Anneliese: Free to try crazy things.
Erika: Free from endless IOU's.
Anneliese: Free to fly
Erika: Free to sing
Anneliese: And marry whom I choose...
Queen Genevieve: I'm so sorry, my darling, but as you know, it is vital you marry King Dominick. It is the only way to take care of our people.
Anneliese: I know, it's my duty.
Queen Genevieve: Oh, and look! Another engagement gift!
Anneliese: You would think that I'm so lucky that I have so many things. I'm realizing that every present comes with strings.
Erika: Though I know I have so little, my determination's strong. People will gather around the world to hear my song.
Bertie: Can I come along?
Anneliese: Now I fear I'll never be...
Erika: Soon I will forever be...
Anneliese&Erika: Free!
Anneliese: I close my eyes and feel myself fly a thousand miles away...
Erika: I could take flight but would it be right? My conscience tells me stay.
Anneliese: I'll remain forever royal.
Erika: I'll repay my parent's debt.
Anneliese & Erika: Duty means doing the things your heart may well regret.
Anneliese: But I'll never stop believing.
Erika: She can never stop my schemes.
Anneliese & Erika: There's more to living than gloves and gowns and threads and seams. In my dreams, I'll be free!
--
Nack: Ok, what idiot put this in here?
Nick: Oh, that would be me.
Nack: Let us review, shall we? We are stealing gold! Is this shiny?
Nick: No.
Nack: Valuable?
Nick: No.
Nack: Gonna make the boss happy?
Nick: No.
Nack: Focus, Nick. That's what you need. That and a break. Shh!!!
Preminger: Why, hello.
Nick: Master Preminger, you're back... here... early. Hope you had a nice journey.
Midas: (Barks)
Nack: Here you are, sir. The last of the gold from the Royal Mine. There's nothing left.
Nick: Yeah, 'cos it's all yours!
Preminger: Yes, it is, very much mine. Finally!
Preminger: I've been bowing, I've been scraping, I've been lying like a rug. And for ten long years I've had to pay my dues. 
But today I am escaping, for the last gold has been dug. It was waiting there, so how could I refuse?
I'm returning home a hero who's discovered mighty wealth, and what better husband could a Princess choose?
I'm the suitor who will suit her, bring the kingdom back to health, and I'll wear the crown, for how could I refuse?
Raise every glass and rouse every cheer! Praise that the reign of Preminger is here! Master in charge of all that I see, All hail me!
And by marrying the princess I get all that I desire. Like a moat, an ermine coat and palace views. Even though she treats me coldly, it's a sign of inner fire. For inside she's thinking "How can I refuse?"
Nack: Right, except for this one little problem, Boss.
Preminger: That's Prince Boss to you!
Nack: Right, and the queen decided to marry her off to the king of Dulcenia next week.
Preminger: What?! Making a decision without me? Who does she think she is?
Nick: Uh, the queen?
Preminger: You simpering simpleton!
Nick: Well, she is the queen! She's got a crown, a scepter, and sits in her great big fancy chair... and those...
Preminger: Silencio!
Preminger: No! I won't let go! This peasant's son won't turn and run because some reckless royal chose another beau! Ahh! It's... a... Temporary setback!
It's a momentary loss. But conveniently my ego doesn't bruise. And the moment that I get back, I will show them who's the boss. You can bet your bullion, there'll be no "I do"'s.
Yes, suppose the girl goes missing. So the king says "au revoir". Then I find her, bring her back, and make the news. Then the queen will be so grateful, that she'll pledge the heir to moi.
And I'll humbly tell her "How can I refuse?"
When our ceremony's over, I'll arise and take the throne. And that nitwit Anneliese can kiss my shoes. For the kingdom and the castle will be mine and mine alone. If the crown should fit then how can I refuse?
Preminger (Nack and Nick): So... get.. ready with the roses and stand by with the champagne. When you've got a brilliant plan you never lose. Yes before the chapter closes. I'll be as big as Charlemagne.
It's a thankless job... but How can I refuse?
How can I refuse?
Preminger: (Evil laugh)
--
Midas: Enjoy it now, sister, 'cos it ain't gonna be yours much longer.
Serafina: Oh, please, having delusions again, Midas?
Midas: Let's just say the throne's gonna belong to my master, Preminger, and anything belonging to him ergo and ipso facto, belongs to me.
Midas: (Barks)
Serafina: (Meows) You lose a tooth, Midas?
Midas: My tooth? No, no, not my tooth! Ah you better hope you got 9 lives, Serafina! 'Cos you're gonna need 'em all!
--
Ambassador Bismark: I am Ambassador Bismark, here by invitation of the queen. King Dominick, you are
quite sure about this?
King Dominick: I am.
Anneliese: Come in! Julian, perfect timing. I classified this as iron pyrite. Pretty, but not considered valuable. Commonly known as "fools gold".
Julian: Well done, your highness.
Anneliese: Your highness? Why the sudden formality? It's just me.
Julian: The queen sent me. Apparently the ambassador has arrived with a gift for you.
Anneliese: The ambassador? He's here already?
King Dominick: On behalf of King Dominick... I present this engagement gift to you.
Queen Genevieve: Oh! Thank you, ambassador! Princess Anneliese will be quite pleased.
Ambassador Bismark: May I enquire, Your Excellency, if you've set a date for the wedding?
Queen Genevieve: Will a week from today do?
Preminger: Ah! Next week? A most wise and thoughtful decision, Your Majesty.
Ambassador Bismark: Excellent. I will... er, send for King Dominick, so that he may meet his new bride.
Anneliese: So happy. Free to do whatever they want. What do you think King Dominick will be like?
Julian: Oh I'm sure he'll be... suitable.
Anneliese: Oh, I know it's the right thing to marry him, but sometimes I wish... well...
Julian: Apparently he's a lover of music. He plays 3 different instruments. The dulcimer, the trumpet, and the piano. Anneliese... you're going to need your cape.
Anneliese: I am? Why?
Julian: There's nothing like some fresh air and a change of scenery.
Anneliese: I wish it were that simple. Come on, Serafina. Ah, it feels so good to be outside the castle walls. Nobody knows who I am. So, which one was your house?
Julian: More of a room, really. We couldn't afford a house.
Anneliese: Oh, I didn't mean...
Julian: I know. Third floor on the left. Did all my studies there.
Julian: A perfect example of 'rosa centifolia'.
Anneliese: My favorite! But, you knew that.
Anneliese: Mmm, that smells delicous.
Julian: I'll be right back.
Erika: Like a bird that flies in the morning light. Or a butterfly in the spring. When your spirit rides on the wings of hope, You'll find your wings.
Anneliese: Let's go listen, Serafina.
Erika: For you're always free to begin again. And you're always free to believe. When you find your place that your heart belongs-
Madame Carp: Caroling?
Erika: Madame Carp! Wait, I earned that!
Madame Carp: And you owe me. Did you really think you could make a living as a singer? Get back to work, girl, or there'll be trouble.
Anneliese: What a beautiful song.
Erika: Thanks. My mom taught it... to... me.
Erika: Whoa
Anneliese: We could be sisters.
Erika & Anneliese: What's your name?
Erika:You first.
Anneliese: Please, call me Anneliese.
Erika: Anneliese? You have the same name as the princess.
Anneliese: Well...
Erika: Oh. I'm Erika, Your Highness. Aren't you supposed to be inside the castle?
Anneliese: I'm savoring a first and last taste of freedom before getting married next week... to a total stranger.
Erika: At least you're not an indentured servant.
Anneliese: Indentured servant?
Erika: If I'd like to have my breakfast hot, Madame Carp will make me pay. And I have to fetch the eggs myself and the barn's a mile away.
It's cold and wet and still I get an omelette on my plate, but in my head I'm back in bed snuggled up and sleeping late
Anneliese: Really?
Erika: Really, but it's alright. I mean, I'm used to it. And you?
Anneliese: Well...
Erika: Well?
Anneliese: If I want some eggs I ring the bell and the maid comes running in. And she serves them on a silver tray and she brings a cookie tin.
And while I eat, she rubs my feet and strolling minstrels play. But I'd rather be in my library reading science books all day.
Erika: I'm just like you
Anneliese: You are?
Erika: You're just like me. There's somewhere else we'd rather be. Somewhere that's ours, somewhere that dreams come true. Yes, I am a girl like you.
You'd never think that it was so, but now I've met you and I know. It's plain as day, sure as the sky is blue, that I am a girl like you.
Anneliese: So! You're a singer?
Erika: No, I work at Madame Carp's penitentiary. Uh, I mean Dress Emporium.
Anneliese: I love Madame Carp's Dresses!
Erika: I made the one you're wearing.
Anneliese: You made this? It's my favorite. The design looks so complicated!
Erika: Oh, but it isn't, really...
First I choose a fabric from the rack and I pin the pattern down. And I stitch it in the front and back and it turns into a gown.
Anneliese: I wear the gown, without my crown and dance around my room. 
Anneliese & Erika: And imagine life without the strife of an unfamiliar groom.
Anneliese: But I'd never let my Mother know. I wouldn't want to disappoint her.
Erika: I completely understand.
Anneliese: I'm just like you
Erika: I think that's true
Anneliese: You're just like me
Erika: Yes, I can see
Anneliese & Erika: We take responsibility. 
Erika: We carry through. 
Anneliese: We carry through.
Anneliese & Erika: Do what we need to do. Yes, I am a girl like you
Erika: I'm just like you
Anneliese: I'm just like you
Erika: You're just like me
Anneliese: You're just like me
Anneliese & Erika: It's something anyone can see
Erika: A heart that beats
Anneliese: A heart that beats
Anneliese & Erika: A voice that speaks the truth. Yes, I am a girl like you.
Erika: It's amazing! Except for our hair.
Anneliese: We could be twins!
Erika & Anneliese: (laughs)
Anneliese: What about this birthmark?
Erika: Hm, no, I guess not.
Julian: Here, Your Highness.
Erika & Anneliese: (laughs)
Julian: It's... uncanny.
Midas: (barks at Serafina)
Serafina: (Meows)
Anneliese: Serafina!
Wolfie: (Barks)
Erika: Wolfie!
Midas: Look who's a long way from the Palace!
Serafina: Don't get any ideas, Midas. I don't get these nails filed for nothing.
Midas: I'll take my chances.
Wolfie: (Growls) I'm warning you, leave her alone!
Midas: Heh! Or you'll do what? Spit a hairball at me?
Wolfie: (Barks)
Serafina: Quite a big bark you have there, Rover!
Wolfie: Uh, it's uh, Wolfie. Not Rover.
Serafina: Well, thank you Wolfie, not Rover. My name's Serafina.
Wolfie: Uh, I haven't seen you around here before.
Serafina: I don't think we run in the same circles, but... perhaps we can change that.
Erika & Anneliese: There you are.
Anneliese: Did I just hear your cat bark?
Erika: He has a style all his own.
Julian: I'm sorry, Your Highness, we should be getting back.
Anneliese: One day you must sing for us at the Palace,
Erika: Really?
Anneliese: I'll send someone for you.
Erika: I'll be at Madame Carp's.
Anneliese: Goodbye, Erika! I won't forget.
Erika: Goodbye! Come on, Wolfie. Wolfie? Cat got your tongue? Come on, boy.
--
Serafina: I may be dainty, but I'm still a feline!
Nick: We did it! Let's go.
Nack: Come here, Nick.
Our job is to capture the princess... not her cat!
Nick: Right. What'd we get the cat for?
Nack: Allow me to demonstrate, dimwit.
Serafina: (Meows)
Anneliese: Serafina? Serafina, where are you? Serafina, come here girl, come here kitty!
Serafina? (Gasps)
Serafina: Well! That certainly wasn't called for.
Hervé: Ooo, are you okay?
Serafina: No, I am not okay! My Mistress is inside with two hooligans, and I've got dirt... dirt on my bum! Who are you?
Hervé: Hervé.
Serafina: Nice to meet you, Hervé. I'm Serafina.
Anneliese: I command you to unlock this door!
Nick: Yes, Your Highness!
Nack: (mimicking) Yes, Your Highness! We're in charge here!
Nick: Right. I knew that!
Serafina: I can't believe they won't let me in there. My princess needs me.
Hervé: I'm sure the boss will let her out.
Serafina: What boss?
Hervé: That boss!
Nack: Signed, sealed, and delivered Master Preminger!
Preminger: Does she know I'm behind this?
Nack: No idea.
Preminger: Good! Keep her here until the wedding to King Dominick is cancelled.
Serafina: (Gasps)
Preminger: Then we'll see who the princess marries!
Serafina: Oh, he is nasty! Just like his dog. Think you could get me up to the roof?
Hervé: I do not know. It is pretty high up.
Serafina: You can do this! Trust me, Hervé. Just count to three.
Hervé: Un, deux, troi-AHHHHH!!!
Serafina: Thank you, Hervé. A girl's got to do what a girl's got to do!
Anneliese: Serafina?
Serafina: I am simply not going to look at myself.
--
Queen Genevieve: Anneliese. Anneliese, Darling? Are you here? Where could she be? She wasn't at breakfast.
Preminger: Is that something on her desk, Your Majesty?
Queen Genevieve: Oh, a letter to me. (Gasps) It says she's run away, so she won't have to marry King Dominick!
Preminger: Well this is dreadful!
Queen Genevieve: We have to find her. She could be hurt!
Preminger: Well I'll send out search parties at once, Your Majesty. I'm sure she couldn't have gotten far.
Queen Genevieve: Preminger, what would I do without you?
Ambassador Bismark: This is an outrage! The most grievous insult!
Queen Genevieve: I am sure we'll find her.
Ambassador Bismark: I insist we cancel the wedding if the princess does not return by the end of the day!
Julian: It doesn't add up. Why would she run away?
Preminger: Why don't you see for yourself.
Julian: Lilac? Where did you find this?
Preminger: On the princess's desk.
Julian: Perhaps I can help you look for her.
Preminger: Why don't you stick to your books, schoolboy. Wouldn't that be fun? (Laughs)
Julian: Lilac? She never scented her stationary with lilac. It was always rose.
--
Madame Carp: Welcome, sir. Are you looking for a gown for a special lady? I can assure you, you will find only the finest at Madame Carp's.
Julian: If I may, I would like to speak to one of your seamstresses, Miss Erika.
Erika: I don't believe it! The princess sent for me!
Julian: Oh, actually-
Erika: I'm going to sing at the castle... me!
Julian: I came because-
Erika: But, I'm not ready. I-I have to rehearse!
Julian: If I could just...
Erika: I better change my dress. Ho-ho, what am I talking about? I only have one dress! Wait, isn't that why you're here?
Julian: I'm sorry, but no. The princess is missing and I need you to help me find her.
Erika: Me? Well what can I do?
Julian: Pretend to be princess Anneliese.
Erika: (Gasps) Are you out of your mind?
Julian: Just listen. I suspect Preminger, the queen's adviser, has taken the princess off somewhere so the Royal Wedding will be cancelled.
Erika: That's awful.
Julian: If you pretend to be the princess, just for a short while, I can trick Preminger into revealing where he's hiding her.
Erika: Pretend to be royalty? I could get thrown in prison, or worse!
Julian: As can I but...
Erika: She's in real trouble, isn't she? A girl like me... Count me in.
--
Erika: Would you look at the size of this place!
Julian: The likeness is remarkable.
Erika: Except for my hair.
Julian: I've thought of that.
Wolfie: (Barks)
Erika: Wolfie! Nice!
Julian: Blond in a box.
Erika: Um, Julian, we're missing one teeny tiny detail. I don't know a thing about being a Princess.
Julian: Leave that to me.
It's all here in the Princess's Book of Etiquette. Let's begin. No nagging, bragging, sweating, fretting, slipping, tripping, slurping, burping, twittering or frittering allowed. Stay present, stay pleasant, stay proud.
To be a princess is to know which spoon to use. To be a princess is a thousand pairs of shoes. To maintain a regal gait leave the parsley on your plate. And be charming but detached and be amused. To be a princess is to never be confused.
Do a plié and never fall don't ever stray from protocol. All through the day there's just one way you must behave. Do keep a grip and never crack, stiff upper lip and arch the back. Bend from above and always wear your gloves, and wave.
Shoulders back and tummy in and pinky out and lift the chin and slowly turn the head from side to side.
Erika: I see now.
Julian: Breathing gently, stepping lightly. Smile brightly, nod politely. Never show a thing you feel inside. Glide! To be a princess is to always look your best. To be a princess is to never get to rest.
Sit for a portrait, never squirm. Sleep on a mattress extra firm. Speak and be clever, never at a loss for words. Curtsy to every count and lord. Learn how to play the harpsichord. Sing lullabies and always harmonize in thirds.
Julian & Erika: Thirds, thirds.
Julian: And... she has beautiful eyes your spirits rise when she walks in the room.
Erika: I see.
Julian: Doors close and the chemistry grows. She's like a rose that's forever in bloom. (his voice breaks and he coughs) Do a plié and don't
Erika: Ever ever ever fall
Julian: Never show dismay
Erika: And be there when people call
Julian: Be prepared whatever royal life will bring. Do keep a grip and don't...
Erika: Ever ever ever crack
Julian: Take a dainty sip
Erika: Never ever turn your back
Julian: There's a time and place and way for everything. To be a princess is to never make your bed. To be a princess is to always use your head.
Erika: Ahh!
--
Ambassador Bismark: It is official, then. Due to the disappearance of the princess, the wedding to King Dominick is cancelled.
Julian: Your Highness, wait! May I present, Princess Anneliese.
Queen Genevieve: Darling?
Erika: Whoa! Phew.
Queen Genevieve: Anneliese? Oh-ho, you're back! Where have you been?
Erika: I am sorry. I should not have run away.
Queen Genevieve: Promise me you'll never do it again.
Ambassador Bismark: I still think we should cancel the wedding.
King Dominick: (coughs)
Ambassador Bismark:Yes, yes, but an agreement is an agreement. The wedding is back on! King Dominick is...is.. is due tomorrow!
Queen Genevieve: Wonderful.
Erika: Uh, tomorrow?
Queen Genevieve: And then, only a few short days before the wedding. Has anyone seen my spectacles?
Preminger: If you'll excuse me, I must be off to see to the... ack!... arrangements. Ahh! Who let this mangey beast in here?
Julian: Everything alright, Preminger?
Preminger: It soon will be. (laughs)
Julian: What have you got there, boy? From a silver fir tree. What's Preminger doing in the Western Forest?
Queen Genevieve: Julian, wait! I want to hear all about how you found Anneliese!
Julian: Ah... ah... of course, Your Majesty.
--
Nick: Hey! I happen to know you've got a 5 of hearts.
Nack: What do you mean you know?
Nick: I saw it!
Nack: You mean you cheated!
Nack: Yeah. I mean, no!
Anneliese: Help, help! Please, help me!
Nick: Yes, Your Highness?
Nack: What is it?
Anneliese: Hurry!
Nack/Nick: Ghost!
Anneliese:Get it! Quick!
Nick: You're older, you get it!
Nack: You're closer, you get it! It's got me!
Nick: Help!
Nack: No, please!
Anneliese: Well done, Serafina. Go, go!
Preminger: Let me in... you idiots!
Nack: Your Bossness, everything is fine. Fine, fine, fine, fine. Just fine! See you soon.
Preminger: How did she escape?
Nack: Who?
Preminger: Who? The princess! You moron! Idiot!
Nack: The princess is here. Sleeping! Aren't you sleeping, Princess?!
Nick: (High Pitched Voice) Yes. I'm sleeping.
Nack: Now, boss, you don't want to wake her up, do you? She's a Royal... She's a Royal, all right,
Preminger: A royal pain in the behind!
Nick: Who interrupts my slipper?
Nack: Slumber, you bonehead!
Nick: Slumber, right! (In normal voice): I knew that.
Preminger: Get out of that bed! I can figure out how the princess escaped you fools! But why didn't she tell the queen she'd been captured? Hmm, something's odd. I must solve this Princess puzzle if I'm to be King.
Julian: King? Preminger?
Preminger: Looking for something, Julian?
Julian: How can you be King?
Preminger: You're the tutor. You're supposed to have all the answers.
Anneliese: Come here, Serafina.
Guard: Who goes there?
Anneliese: Princess Anneliese!
Guard: If you're the princess, I'm the king.
Anneliese: But, I am the princess.
Guard: Really? Then how come I just saw the princess eating dinner with the queen?
Anneliese: What princess?
Guard: Now move along before I lost my temper.
Anneliese: You are speaking to Princess Anneliese! Let me through!
Guard: I said move along! Now!
Anneliese: We'll find help in here.
Madame Carp: What are you doing here?
Anneliese: I beg your pardon!
Madame Carp: Not another word! You're coming with me!
Not done yet? If you weren't such a... lazy cow... those dresses would be finished by now.
Anneliese: How dare you speak to her that way!
Madame Carp: How dare I? H-h-how dare I?! Just who do you think you are?
Anneliese: Princess Anneliese!
Madame Carp: That's a hoot! You've got to change a lot more than your hair to look like the princess. Why me and the princess are close, personal friends.
Anneliese: Oh really?
Madame Carp: Now, shut up and get back to work!
Anneliese: I'm warning you, if you're going to treat your seamstresses this way, we'll take our royal business elsewhere.
Madame Carp: You're warning me? We'll see your attitude change by morning. You're not coming out until every dress is finished... Erika!
Anneliese: Erika? Locked in again!
Bertie: Erika? That is you, isn't it?
Anneliese: "Made exclusively by Madame Carp".
Bertie: If Wolfie can slip and in and out, I'm sure your pretty little Serafina can do it too.
Anneliese: It's up to you now, Serafina. Take this to the Castle. When somebody reads the label, it'll lead them here.
Serafina: This is going to be a long night.
--
Erika: I thought I was dreaming, but I'm not. Shh! Wolfie, we've gotta, you know, act like we live here! We can't give ourselves away. Be a Princess! Be a Princess! Come in.
Maid: Did I hear a dog, Your Majesty? Should I call the Royal Dogcatcher?
Erika: Ah, no, no. Dog? Everything is fine.
Maid: Your breakfast, Your Highness.
Erika: Really? In bed?
Maid: As always.
Erika: Oh yes. Of course. Thank you. Look at all this food! Want some?
Maid: Oh I-I couldn't, Your Highness!
Erika: But there's enough to feed an army! Come on, take some.
Maid: I, uh, thank you, um, m'lady. I'll draw your bath. Would you like bubbles, mineral salts, or lavender oil
Erika: Everything!
Ambassador Bismark: You're going to just tell her that you disguised yourself as a page? Are you sure that's wise, King Dominick?
King Dominick: No, I'm not sure. But I have to be honest. I think she'll understand. I didn't want to marry a stranger any more than she did.
Erika: (Sighing) I may never come out.
Wolfie: Mehh-
Erika: What's wrong, Wolfie? Are you sick? Something in your throat?
Wolfie: Mehh-
Erika: Wait a minute. Are you trying to meow?
Wolfie: Mehh- Woof!
Erika: Oh, fella... I can see it when you're feeling low, you can't hide that from me. You're no status quo calico so why keep trying to be? 'Cause you're more than that, you're a doggish cat. I wish you could see the you I see...
Wolfie: Mehh-
Erika: No. I say, if you bark celebrate it. Make your mark, serenade it. Noah's ark should've had a cat like you. And if what you are is a strange you. Doesn't mean you should change you. Only means you should change your point of view...
King Dominick: Princess Anneliese?
Erika: Hey, feline. You fetch just fine you. To thine ownself be true. Your bow wow's the cat's meow. It's how I know you're you.
You don't need the bows or tiara, Bid your woes sayonara. Trust your nose cause it knows the way to go. When you chase your tail, you're enchanting. Spirit sails when you're panting. When you wail you're a rover, Romeo.
There is not one hair of you that I would rearrange. I love you the way you are and that will never change. That will never...change.
Wolfie: Woof!
Erika: That's my boy!
Anneliese: There, this one's finished! Uh, sort of...
Bertie: Please, Your Highness, you don't have to do this!
Anneliese: I can't let you do it all by yourself.
--
Erika: How am I going to do this? Everyone will know I'm a fake. They'll throw me in the dungeon in two seconds flat! Oh Julian, where are you? Why aren't you here?
Preminger: Your most beautiful, Highness.
Wolfie: (Barks at Preminger)
Preminger: What's this stupid cat doing here?
Erika: He belongs to me!
Preminger: Oh! He's yours, is he? Well, a thousand apologies, my lady. Such a canine... feline. What happened to the other one?
Erika: Uh... she's around here somewhere.
Preminger: I see. So rare... that you're apart. The queen has sent me to escort you to meet the king.
Erika: Uhh... Thank you.
King Dominick: I appreciate your understanding, Your majesty.
Queen Genevieve: Likewise, King Dominick. I apologize for my daughter's little delay in the wedding plans. But it's all sorted out now.
Preminger: May I announce, Princess Anneliese.
Queen Genevieve: Oh hello, Darling. Come, come. I want to introduce you to King Dominick. He has something he wants to tell you. Where are my spectacles?
King Dominick: I'm honored.
Erika: Uhh... The honor's mine, King Dominick.
Dominick: Please, just call me Dominick.
Erika: Oh, call me Eri... I mean Anneliese. Princess Anneliese. That's my name.
Wolfie: (Barks and Meows)
King Dominick: I hope his bark is bigger than his bite.
Erika: He likes you.
King Dominick: I'm sure you're wondering why I disguised myself as a page. I wanted to meet you without all this-this ceremony. To get to know the real you.
Erika: Uh, the real me...
Queen Genevieve: King Dominick, would you do us the honor of playing the piano? I know you love music.
Erika: You do?
King Dominick: I will, if the princess agrees to sing with me.
Erika: Sing with you. Uh, no, no, I couldn't.
King Dominick: Something tells me you have a wonderful voice.
Queen Genevieve: Sing, darling.
Erika: Once a lass met a lad. "You're a gentle one" said she. In my heart I'd be glad if you loved me for me. You say your love is true and I hope that it will be...
King Dominick: I'd be sure, if I knew that you loved me for me.
Erika: Could I be the one you're seeking? Will I be the one you choose? Can you tell my heart is speaking? My eyes will give you clues
King Dominick: What you see may be deceiving, truth lies underneath the skin...
Erika: Hope will blossom by believing
Erika & Dominick: The heart that lies within 
King Dominick: I'll be yours. Together we shall always be as one, if you love me for me.
Erika (Dominick): Who can say where we'll go? (I'll be yours. Together we shall always be as one) Who can promise what will be... But I'll stay by your side if you love me for me.
Erika & Dominick: If you love me for me.
Dominick: Breath-taking.
Erika: The prettiest sunset I've ever seen.
Dominick: There's something about you... You're honest ... no pretenses. I like that. Until tomorrow, Your Highness.
Erika: "Honest"? "No pretenses"? Oh, Wolfie, Julian and the princess are still missing. And I think I'm falling in love with the king.
Preminger: Why, it's our missing little feline.
Serafina: (Meows)
Midas: (Growls)
Preminger: But with an attitude, oh yes! I never liked cats. Hm. The princess's ring. How odd. Madame Carp's Dress Shop? Maybe the answer to our mystery.
Serafina: Thank you, Hervé.  (gasps) My princess!
Anneliese: Preminger, you found my ring! You good girl!
Preminger: Princess...
Serafina: (Meows angrily)
Anneliese: Serafina, what's gotten into you?
Preminger: Come quickly, Princess. You can tell me everything on the way to the castle.
Anneliese: But first let me... No, no. No time, Your Highness.
Bertie: Princess?
Anneliese: What are we doing here?
Preminger: Taking a little side trip, Princess.
Anneliese: You were behind this!
Preminger: Very clever planting a double to fool even me. But not quite clever enough. Checkmate! I win.
Anneliese: Serafina!
Nack: Nice to see you again, Your Highness.
Nick: Watch your step.
Anneliese: I don't understand, Preminger. Why would you do this?
Nick: To be king.
Anneliese: And how would you get to be king?
Preminger: Still underestimating me? Isn't that just like a royal.
Nack: He was going to marry you
Anneliese: What?!
Nack: Now, he's got a new bride in mind.
Preminger: Your mother is a very handsome woman. (laughs evilly)
Anneliese: Julian!
Julian: Anneliese?!
Preminger: How sad they'll be when they discover you died in a tragic accident.
Julian: They'll never give up looking for the princess!
Preminger: Oh I think they will. When I show them this! (Evil laughter) Oh that's funny.
Julian: No good.
Anneliese: We have to stop him.
Preminger: Put a little muscle behind it!
Anneliese: What's that?
Preminger: Move it!
--
Queen Genevieve: Everything seems to be in order. Thank you, Ambassador. The kingdoms will be officially joined after the wedding tomorrow. Are you ready, Darling?
Erika: Ready...ha..ha, well...
King Dominick: For my bride to be.
Erika: Whoa!
Preminger: Grab her! She's an imposter!
Queen Genevieve: Preminger, what are you doing?
Erika: Get your hands off me!
King Dominick: Release the princess!
Preminger: She's a fake! A common pauper!
Queen Genevieve: Are you telling me I don't know my own daughter?
Preminger: I only just discovered the truth myself, Your majesty. Have you not wondered why we haven't seen Julian lately? He's conspiring with this-this imposter! Together they took the princess and hid her in the Royal Mine so- so she could take her place, marry King Dominick and take over the kingdom!
King Dominick: And what proof do you have of this ridiculous story?
Preminger: Once I discovered this treachery, I tried to rescue the princess but it was too late. They sabotaged the Mine, collapsing it. I'm afraid this is all my workers found in the rubble.
Queen Genevieve: No! It cannot be!
Preminger: Check her shoulder! There's no royal birthmark. I assure you.
Queen Genevieve: It's true...
King Dominick: I don't believe it.
Erika: I can explain.
Preminger: Throw her in the dungeon!
Erika: No, wait! I-I'm not the princess, but I never hurt her or anybody else!
Ambassador Bismark: Unbelievable! It's an outrage!
Erika: I-I just wanted to save the princess! From him!
Preminger: The dungeon!
Queen Genevieve: My daughter... My poor daughter...
Ambassador Bismark: What do they take us for? Fools? Trying to marry you off to a mere pauper!?
King Dominick: It doesn't make sense.
Ambassador Bismark: I should say not. The sooner we leave, the happier I will be.
Erika: Do a plié and never fall. Don't ever stray from protocol. All through the day there's just one way, you must behave. Do keep a grip and never crack, Stiff upper lip...Stiff upper lip... cries)
Queen Genevieve: (Sobs)
Preminger: Ah! Just who I wanted to see.
Queen Genevieve: Preminger, what is it?
Preminger: So many problems. I'm here to help.
Queen Genevieve: You can't bring my daughter back.
Preminger: Too true. But I can provide the answer to saving your Kingdom. A little business venture of mine was very successful. You could say I "struck gold". I'm as wealthy as King Dominick.
Well your good luck has departed and your people soon will starve. Au revoir to your foie gras and cheese fondues. But because I'm so good-hearted half my fortune I will carve. I feel your pain, so how could I refuse?
But to give me some incentive, there's just one thing I require. And it's something that you never even use. And it's nothing that inventive just the one thing I desire. This simple crown, yes, how could I refuse?
Oh, don't let your spirits falter I've a ring box in my hand, and I booked a band so grab your dancing shoes. And come with me to the altar see the lingdom as you plan. Yes, marry me for how can you refuse? How can you refuse? (Evil laughter)
--
Hervé: Are you Wolfie? Serafina's friend?
Wolfie: I like to think so.
Hervé: She needs help, and so does the princess.
Wolfie: What? Show me, quick!
Serafina: (Cries)
Anneliese: Sorry, Serafina!
Julian: It's hopeless. I'm sorry, Anneliese.
Anneliese: Do you know why I didn't want to marry the king?
Julian: You weren't ready to get married.
Anneliese: No, I was in love with somebody else. My best friend. The man who's taught me so much.
Julian: But I'm not a King. I can't give you what he can.
Anneliese: I think you're like this.
Julian: A rock?
Anneliese: Unassuming on the outside, and a treasure within.
Julian: We'll get out of here somehow. I promise.
Wolfie: Don't tell me she's in there.
Hervé: Alright, I will not tell you.
Wolfie: (sniffs) Ooo, I'm getting... Ooo yeah, I'm getting...
Hervé: Uh, dizzy?
Wolfie: No. A scent. There's another way in.
Preminger: Look at you... looking at me. Lovely.
Serafina: (Gasps)
Wolfie: Hey! Hey, hey, hey! Down here! (starts digging) What do ya make of that?
Hervé: Oh, uh, you are an excellent digger.
Wolfie: Thank you, but I meant look! I'll bet I can get to Serafina and the princess this way.
Erika: (Silently hums to "If You Love me for me")
Hervé: You are going down there?
Wolfie: A cat always lands on his feet, even one that barks! (Barks)
Anneliese: Erika's cat?
Julian: An old mine shaft.
Anneliese: Hello? Anybody up there? Water... Here, help me! Beautiful.
Erika: (continues to hum "If You Love me for me" until she escapes) No, let me go!
Guard: Thought you could escape, did you? I'll lock her up.
King Dominick (In Guard's disguise): I'm to take her to the castle.
Guard: But...
King Dominick: Queen's orders.
Guard: Oh, well, right then.
Nack: Looking good, Sir Nick.
Nick: Feeling good, Sir Nack.
Preminger: Smile, my Dear. You're about to become my Queen.
Queen Genevieve: Only to save my people. Your fortune will help them all.
King Dominick: This way. Hey! I guess I deserved that.
Erika: Dominick? I need to explain...
King Dominick: I don't believe you're the person Preminger says you are.
Erika: You do love disguises, don't you?
King Dominick: Come, we need to hurry!
Priest: Do you, Preminger, take this woman to be your bride?
Preminger: Yes. How could I refuse?
Priest: And do you, My Queen, take this man to be your husband?
Queen Genevieve: I... I... uh I.. I d...
Anneliese: Wait! Wait! Stop the wedding, Mother!
Queen Genevieve: (Gasps in happiness) Anneliese?
Preminger: But, she's dead, Your Highness! The imposter must have escaped.
Anneliese: No, Preminger!
Queen Genevieve: It is you! My Darling.
Crowd: It's the princess! She's back!
Erika: It's the princess! She's alive!
Queen Genevieve: But where were you? I thought...
Anneliese: What he wanted you to think!
Queen Genevieve: Guards! Take him!
Preminger: Hai!
Erika: He can't get away!
King Dominick: He won't get away!
Anneliese: Nice to see you again.
Erika: Going somewhere?
Wolfie: Not so fast, puffy!
Serafina: Now who has nowhere to go?
Midas: Yeah, nowhere to go... but through you! My tooth! Oh, my beautiful tooth!
Preminger: Faster, you old nag! I've seen snails faster! What are you doing? Turn around! Stop, you stupid beast! I said stop!
Serafina: I like your style, Hervé.
Hervé: So do I.
--
Queen Genevieve: Preminger played me for a fool. I'm sorry, my Darling Anneliese. When I think what might have happened...
Anneliese: But it didn't. Thanks to Erika and the man I love... Julian.
Queen Genevieve: Julian?
Anneliese: He's kind, intelligent, and my best friend. Mother, it's Julian I want to marry.
Queen Genevieve: I want you to be happy. But it is our duty to take care of our people first.
Anneliese: I can do that. I found something very interesting in the mine.
King Dominick: I can't convince you to stay?
Erika: Dominick, I... All my life I've dreamed of being free. Now my debt's been paid, thanks to Anneliese.
King Dominick: Where will you go?
Erika: Everywhere. I want to sing, see the world!
King Dominick: Then, I hope you'll take this with you.
Erika: I couldn't.
Dominick: It was meant for you.
Erika: No promises?
King Dominick: I'll take my chances.
--
Narrator: Princess Anneliese was right about the Mine. She discovered it was filled with geodes. Under her direction, the beautiful crystals created a new industry. The kingdom was saved.
As for Madame Carp, without the word from the Castle, she went out of business.
After months of traveling, Erika realized there was one place she wanted to stay more than anywhere else. Sometimes being free means choosing not to go, but to stay.
Erika: And you're always free to begin again, and you're always free to believe. When you find the place that your heart belongs, you'll never leave...
Anneliese: You and I will always be celebrating life together. 
Erika & Anneliese:I know I have found a friend forevermore.
Anneliese: Love is like a melody, one that I will always treasure., courage is the key that opens every door...
Erika & Anneliese: Though you may not know where your gifts may lead, and it may not show at the start. When you live your dreams you'll find that destiny is written in your heart...
Narrator: And, of course, Wolfie and Serafina lived happily ever after. Along with their many, many, many kittens.
Kitten: (meows then barks)
All main singers: Though you may not know where your gifts may lead, and it may not show at the start. When you live your dream you'll find that destiny is written in your heart.
--
=== Bloopers: ===
Director: Standing cat is ready. Serafina stunt test: take one. And... action! (Cat flies above roof and never to be seen)
Serafina: Oh, Dear.
Director: Quiet on the set please. And... action! (Cat bangs onto the wall)
Serafina: Uh, I'm quite sure this is a good idea.
Director: Take 37. And... action! (Cat enters the house by crashing onto the window) Olay, let's bring in Serafina!
Serafina: Uh, can you get my agent on the phone?
-
Preminger: My, you're attractive.
-
Erika: You're no status quo calico so why keep trying to be, 'cause you're more than that you're a dogish --
Wolfie: (Splashes) Woof!
Erika: Wolfie!
Director: Cut! Ok, can I get a hair dryer over here?
-
Preminger: Aren't you pleasant to the eye you, reflection you!
-
Director: Mine cart, take one. And... action!
(Only Nack jumps into the cart)
Director: Cut! Uh Nick, um, you're supposed to jump into the cart.
Nick: Right. I knew that!
-
Preminger: Is that really me? In there? Looking at me? Lucky me!
-
King Dominick: Breath taking!
Erika: (Sighs)
(Cell Phone Rings)
Erika: (Gasps) Haha, how romantic, right?
-
Preminger: Very handsome, very fit! Very irresistible!
-
Julian: Do a plié and don't
Erika: Ever ever ever fall
Julian: Never show dismay (starts dancing randomly)
Erika: (laughs)
-
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