Scream (2022)/Transcript

Hello?
Hello.
Is Cristina there?
No, she’s not available. May I take a message?
Sorry, I’m a friend of hers from group… Oh, shit.
From her shit?
Look, just tell her I’m from group. I’m Charlie. She’s got my number.
She goes to your group?
I shouldn’t have…
Just tell her that Charlie called.
I will do exactly that, Charlie, once you tell me what kind of group we’re talking about.
Is it AA? NA?
You sound exactly like she describes you.
She talks about me in group?
I don’t think I can really talk about that.
What does she say about me?
She loves you very much.
What does she love about me?
She loves that you’re creative.
You love art and TV and movies.
Lots of people love movies.
Yeah, but she says you love scary movies and that you guys have that in common.
She’s proud of making a fan out of you.
She is?
Yeah.
She told me the other day, she wonders… what’s your favorite scary movie?
The Babadook. It’s an amazing meditation on motherhood and grief.
Isn’t that a little fancy pants?
Well, it’s elevated horror.
Uh-huh. What does that mean, “Elevated horror”?
It’s scary but with complex emotional and thematic underpinnings.
It’s not just some schlocky, cheeseball nonsense with wall-to-wall jump scares.
Sounds kind of boring to me.
Have you ever seen Stab?
Once, I think.
At a sleepover when I was, like, 12.
You live in Woodsboro and you don’t know Stab?
Your mother loves that movie. She talks about it all the time in group.
How well do you remember the original?
I don’t know. I mean, it was super ’90s.
It was really over-lit and everyone had weird hair.
Do you remember the beginning?
Not really.
It started with a kill scene, right? They always started with a kill scene.
Yeah, that’s right. That’s right.
It’s a girl at home, alone.
She answers a wrong number and starts talking with the killer who makes her play a game.
Would you like to play a game…
Tara?
Systems armed.
This isn’t fucking funny, Amber.
I told you, this isn’t Amber.
Amber’s looking particularly fetching tonight.
She really shouldn’t leave her phone lying around for anyone to clone.
What do you want?
I told you, I want to play a game.
Stab movie trivia, three rounds.
You call the cops, she dies You get a question wrong, she dies.
Her parents aren’t home. I can be in that room in 15 seconds.
You want a warmup question?
I told you I don’t know these movies!
Ask me about something I do know.
Ask me about It Follows. Ask me about Hereditary.
Ask me about The Witch.
In the first Stab movie,
what Woodsboro native was introduced as the franchise’s main character?
It’s Sidney Prescott!
It’s Sidney Prescott and she lived on Elm.
Correct. You see, you’re gonna do great at this.
Okay, question one…
No, I got that one right. It should count.
Anyone could have gotten that one right Sidney’s in every movie but the last one.
Question one:
Who wrote the original book that the Stab movies are based on?
The chick from TV!
“The chick from TV” is not gonna cut it, Tara.
Gale Weathers!
It is Gale Weathers, you motherfucker!
Correct. Amber might live to see the sunrise.
Question two: Who played the dumb bitch at the beginning of Stab 1
who answers the phone and gets carved up by the killer?
Fuck you.
Is that the answer you’re going with?
A non-answer counts as a wrong answer, Tara.
Time’s running out.
Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock…
Heather Graham!
Correct! You pulled that one out.
Now for the final question:
Who was the killer in Stab 1?
I know this one, you fuck.
It’s Billy Loomis!
He was Sidney’s boyfriend, and he was played by Luke Wilson,
and I got you, asshole!
I got it! I got it right!
Oh, I’m sorry, Tara, but that’s just not correct.
What?
No, no, it is. It is. That is right.
The correct answer is Billy Loomis and Stu Macher.
There are two killers in the original Stab.
I’m afraid someone’s got to die now.
No, no, no. Amber, I’m coming.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Systems armed.
The police are on their way, asshole!
All systems disarmed.
Systems armed.
All systems disarmed.
Oh, my God. No.
Systems armed.
All systems disarmed Systems armed.
All systems disarmed.
Systems armed.
Hello?
Bonus question, Tara.
Please stop.
Do you think I made it inside your house before you could rearm?
Help!
Excuse me, miss?
What’d you just take?
Your boner pills.
Good luck getting it up now.
You…
You are my boner pills.
No. No.
You okay?
Yes.
You don’t have to check on me all the time I’m not breakable.
Yeah, this. I know.
Shit.
Sam?
Hey. What’s going on?
Tara… was attacked.
What? Is she…
She’s alive, but in bad shape.
She was…
stabbed.
Stabbed? What the fuck?
She made it through surgery and the doctor said it went well.
She’s resting now.
I know you guys aren’t on the best terms, but…
I’m on my way.
She’s gonna be okay, Sam. We’ll see you soon.
Hey, wait, Wes!
Yeah?
Do they know who did this?
It’s probably better if you just come here.
Wes.
She said it was someone in a fucking Ghostface mask.
My sister was attacked.
I gotta go.
Wait, hey! I’m going with you.
No, Richie…
No, Sam. I’m coming with you.
Okay.
Okay. Yeah.
Attention, Panthers. A reminder that all classes and school activities
are canceled tomorrow due to public safety concerns.
That was Sam.
She’s coming?
Yeah.
Watch everything get worse.
Listen, all I’m saying is, with everything going on right now,
I think it’s time we take our relationship to the next, most intimate level.
He wants me to accept his Find My Fam request.
It’s the smartest option with a would-be killer on the loose.
You know exactly where I am and I know exactly where you are.
Aw, you can stalk me like a jealous boyfriend.
And you can stalk me like a jealous boyfriend.
Is this because you two aren’t having sex yet?
You actually bring up a very good point. Not that I want to sound
like a stereotypical jock trying to get into his girlfriend’s pants.
Great!
Don’t do it, Liv. There’s a psycho out there.
You make yourself harder to find.
Delete social media, tape over your phone camera, disable GPS.
Yes, thank you very much, Edward Snowden.
Actually, your mother just interrogated me about Tara’s attempted murder,
which was very fun.
I’m sure she’s asking everybody. I mean, Ghostface is back.
The press still isn’t saying Ghostface.
My mom doesn’t want to cause a panic.
It’ll get out by the second or third killing.
Jesus, Mindy, there wasn’t a first killing Tara’s alive.
That means she could still die.
What the fuck?
Or the killer could come back for her.
Fuck! Mindy, come on.
I’m just telling you, arm up, okay? Pepper spray, check. Taser, check.
Girlfriend repellent, check.
Nice. Thank you.
Oh, shit. Is that… Vince?
Wait. The creep you hooked up with last summer?
Yeah, he worked with me and Tara.
He worked with Tara?
He’s been stalking my Instagram the last couple weeks,
posting the creepiest shit.
Probably time to introduce him to Hobbs and Shaw.
Maybe not the best idea to incite violence right in front of the sheriff.
Looks like he’s leaving.
Thanks anyway, boys.
Tara says she fought back hard. You’ve got bruises.
From football practice.
Oh, sure.
Tara’s awake. She just texted.
I’m going to the hospital. You guys coming?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I can’t, but I’ll meet you guys later.
All right.
I’ve actually never seen Stab.
You’ve never seen Stab?
Not even the one that came out last year?
I’ve never seen Gone With the Wind either,
but I don’t consider it like a huge hole in my cinematic education.
Most of the Stab movies are based on things that happened here.
Define “things”.
Things like…
a guy named Billy Loomis and his friend carved up a bunch of high-school kids
while wearing this Halloween ghost mask.
You mean like in Halloween?
No. Not like in Halloween.
Sounds a lot like Halloween.
All right, it’s a little like Halloween.
And every decade or so, some idiot gets the bright idea
to put on the mask, kill his friends, and get famous, too.
The last time it happened was in 2011.
And we came here voluntarily?
Well, I got to make sure Tara’s okay.
Yes, of course.
And I got to make sure we don’t get sliced up by some lunatic
who saw Friday the 13th and thought, “You know what?
That Jason guy, he’s got some pretty solid ideas”.
Can I just ask you one question, though?
Yeah.
Do you have any idea why
someone wearing that mask would want to kill your sister?
No.
How are you feeling?
You came.
Of course I came.
This is my boyfriend, Richie.
It’s so nice to meet you. I’m so sorry if I’m intruding.
Nice to meet you, too.
Hi.
Hi.
Thank you for calling.
Of course.
Look at your hair! I like it.
These are Chad and Mindy, the twins. And Wes.
I used to babysit them all.
Which is always how I like to be introduced.
And Amber. Hey.
Hi. Nice to see you.
Hi. I’m Richie.
Hi.
Where’s Mom?
She’s stuck at a conference in London.
She called me earlier.
Yeah, for all of ten minutes.
Look, guys, Tara’s really tired. Maybe we should just give her some space.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Not you, Sam.
I want you to stay.
Okay.
But the rest.
Yeah.
If it’s okay with you, I could sleep here tonight.
I’d really like that.
Okay.
Do you have your extra inhaler?
Yeah, I’ll be fine.
Okay.
Honey? Okay, I’ll just be right outside.
Thank you.
Bye.
Sam, I was so scared.
I know.
It’s okay.
So what is she like, the sister?
Sam? Sam is so cool.
You only say that because she let you wear Pokemon onesies to bed for a year.
That’s true. That’s a true statement.
No, trust me, Sam is not cool.
Her dad left her mom. Walks right out when Tara’s eight, Sam’s 13.
Sam started acting out, getting in trouble with the cops.
And then, on Sam’s 18th birthday, she leaves.
Ghosts them all.
Maybe Sam’s changed. I just don’t want to see Tara hurt again.
So what, you’re protecting Tara from her own sister now?
Well, someone has to.
Okay, so no guys are good enough for her and now her family’s off-limits, too?
Mm, motive.
“If I can’t have her, no one can”.
What?
We all know you have a crush on Tara.
Okay. Come on, Mindy.
But we’re all suspects.
Except maybe Liv.
Thank you.
You’re way too boring to be a psycho.
Yo, Liv. You want a real drink?
Or are you happy sitting at this kids’ table?
Listen up, Uglier Michael Myers, it was a summer fling. It meant nothing.
Was I talking to you?
I don’t care who you’re talking to.
Liv, let’s go.
Don’t talk to her!
I don’t want to hear your voice.
Shut your mouth.
Better shut the fuck up.
Get out of here or I’m calling the cops.
Go!
I’ll see you soon, sweetheart.
Hey, man, fuck you.
You kids, too! Let’s go!
Did you see that shit?
Fuck this bar, man.
Fuck you.
Fuck it!
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
Is that you, pretty boy? Huh?
Get out of my fucking car!
Hey.
You okay?
Yeah.
Just a bad dream.
What are you watching?
Stab is on Netflix.
What? I want to be prepared.
I got to go find something to eat.
Yeah, okay.
How you doing, Sam?
Antipsychotics aren’t working as well as they used to, are they?
Fuck you.
You can’t run from who you are, Sam.
I’m just trying to help.
Hey, when are you gonna tell her why all this is happening?
Hello.
Hello, Samantha.
Who is this?
Someone who knows your little family secret.
You’re the fuck who hurt my sister?
She’s not the only one I’m gonna hurt.
I had to get you to come back here somehow, didn’t I?
You want to fuck with me, asshole?
I’m right here. Come and get me.
With pleasure.
Help!
Help! Help!
Somebody help me, he’s trying to kill me!
What’s going on? You’re okay.
Somebody tried to kill me in the break room!
I’ve got a body outside a bar on Main, and then you get attacked here.
You said the call came from Amber’s number?
So? We know he called on my phone before when he attacked Tara.
Or, and I’m just spit-balling here… you’re the killer.
And where were you when all this happened?
I was… watching Netflix.
Ooh, yeah. Super-solid alibi, bro.
So where were you?
I was questioning Amber and her friends at the sheriff’s station.
Yeah, I came as soon as I heard.
But, you know, the Netflix alibi is good, too.
Both of you, stop it.
You’re gonna put more cops on her room, right?
Yes.
And I can move you to a private floor.
Deputy Vinson knows what he’s doing, you’ll be safe.
Like we’ve been so far?
Samantha, let’s step outside.
Nice to see you, Deputy Hicks.
So many fun memories.
It’s “Sheriff” Hicks.
I remember you, too…
and all the trouble you used to cause your family.
Your presence here is not helping.
So maybe when the sun comes up,
you and your boyfriend can hit the road
and leave it to people who actually care about this community.
Well, she remains a delight.
Are you okay?
Would you mind giving us a second? I need to talk to Tara.
Come on, Netflix, let’s go.
Do you remember when Dad left?
Parts, sure.
I was eight. What does that have to do with anything?
It has to do with it.
Do you remember how…
Mom used to keep those boxes up in the attic?
Well, I was up there once…
When I was 13, looking for Christmas presents.
And I found these old diaries that she kept from high school.
Sam, what is…
Please.
I have to do this.
So I found these old diaries.
And I knew it was wrong, but I read some anyway
because Mom got pregnant with me in high school,
and I thought it could be cool to find out how she and Dad got together.
How romantic it must have been.
So I read some.
Only it wasn’t romantic.
Mom was dating Dad, but…
she was in love with this other guy…
and he got her pregnant.
She told Dad it was his, and that’s why he proposed senior year.
Sam, what are you talking about?
And I’m sitting there, in this attic…
and I’m 13…
and I just found out my dad isn’t my dad.
So I go find Mom in her bedroom, and I’m screaming at her
and shoving this diary in her face,
and I didn’t even realize…
that Dad was standing right behind me.
He didn’t know.
He found out right then from me.
He left that night.
I’m the reason he left.
No.
No, Sam…
Mom never forgave me.
Then she made me promise never to tell you because you were so young.
And that’s why I changed
and I got distant and weird with you.
And I went out and I started doing every drug that I could get my hands on
until I couldn’t take it anymore and I left town.
I just couldn’t be around you anymore, Tara.
Not only because I destroyed our family that night, but because…
those diaries told me who my real father was.
It was Billy Loomis.
And somebody knows, and I think that’s why you got hurt.
And I’m so fucking sorry that I never told you and then I ran away.
I’m so sorry.
Get out.
Tara.
You’re gone for five years…
Five whole years.
And then I get stabbed and you want to come back
and drop all this shit on me?
I thought I was protecting you.
Protecting me from what?
The truth?
No. No, I… Please, Tara.
Sam.
Sam, I need you to get the fuck out.
I’m so sorry.
Sam.
Please.
Get the fuck out!
Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay, it’s me.
Were you listening at the door?
No, no, of course not.
Okay, yeah, I was listening at the door.
It doesn’t freak you out…
that my real father was a serial killer?
I mean…
yeah.
A great deal, yeah.
Okay, well, then go I get it.
I just got to stay and figure it out.
I’m not leaving you here, Sam.
You know that part in horror movies
where you want to yell at the characters to be smart and get the fuck out?
This is that part, Richie.
You should get the fuck out.
But I’m staying.
I love you.
You’re such a dumbass.
I’m such a dumbass.
So…
your sister won’t talk to you.
The police aren’t gonna help.
What’s our next move?
We go talk to an expert.
A few temperatures here. Tuesday, Wednesday in the mid-50s,
and then finally we’ll see those mid-60s returning into next week.
And just one night after a local teen was attacked in her home
by an assailant in a Ghostface costume,
Sheriff Judy Hicks has now confirmed
two more late-night attacks that have left Woodsboro reeling.
The first victim, Vincent Schneider, was found dead
behind the Corner Pocket Pool Hall.
A second victim, as yet unnamed, was attacked
inside Woodsboro General Hospital,
but she escaped without injuries.
Needless to say, Woodsboro is on high alert today…
Live from Studio 1-A in Rockefeller Plaza…
Good morning. I’m Gale Weathers.
Before we dive in, I want to tell you a little story
that happened on the way to the studio this morning.
I stopped to get a bacon, egg and cheese at a bodega,
already a quintessentially New York…
Go away!
Sorry to bother you, Mr. Riley!
We just want to ask you a few questions.
I don’t give interviews.
We’re not looking for an interview.
Give me one good reason why I should talk to you.
I’m Billy Loomis’s daughter.
That’s a terrible reason for me to talk to you.
My name is Samantha Carpenter.
I was attacked last night at the hospital.
The night before that, my sister was stabbed seven times.
I know you know what that’s like.
I’m just trying to protect my family.
Five minutes. That’s all I’m asking.
I’ll give you two minutes.
I’m missing a show I like.
If I ever threaten to get bangs, stage an intervention.
Gale Weathers.
Weren’t you two…
Yeah.
Who’s he?
This is Richie, my boyfriend.
How long have you known him?
Six months?
Did he know who your dad was when you met?
Express any interest in Woodsboro or the Ghostface killings?
What the hell are you talking about?
Your killer’s obsessed with the Stab movies, right?
Well, there are certain rules to surviving a Stab movie.
Believe me, I know.
Rule number one:
Never trust the love interest.
They seem sweet, caring, supportive.
Then welcome to act 3, where they’re trying to rip your head off.
I was with Sam in Modesto when Tara was attacked.
And let me guess, you were just in the other room,
conveniently unaccounted for when she was attacked at the hospital.
Do I have to take this from shitty Sam Elliott over here, or what?
Rule number two:
The killer’s motive is always connected to something in the past.
I’m related to Billy.
Right, but then why kill that random Vince guy?
That’s for you to figure out.
And rule number three, and this is the most important rule:
The first victim always has a friend group that the killer is a part of.
Does your sister have a close-knit group of friends?
Yeah.
She does.
Then look for the killer there.
If you can find out why they’re doing this,
you can figure out who’s next.
So help us.
Help us figure out who is behind this.
You kidding me? I’ve been stabbed nine times.
I’ve got permanent nerve damage and a fun little limp.
You think I want to do that again?
You just said it always goes back to the past, right?
So if I’m in danger…
that means you’re in danger.
Come on.
Let’s do this together.
Your time’s up.
Jesus!
Yeah, he’s way more fun in the movies.
Okay, what’s next?
The friends.
Thanks so much for that, Kevin.
Coming up after our local weather,
the pros and cons of reuniting with old friends.
Hello?
Hey, Sid, it’s me.
Dewey?
Oh, my God. How long has it been?
I’m just trying to get a run in before I take the girls to school.
How are you?
I’m good, really good.
How are you? How’s Mark?
I think I’ll keep him.
How are things in the sheriff’s business?
They’re…
They’re fine. But, Sid…
Have you talked to Gale lately?
No. Not in a couple years.
I know things didn’t end well with you guys, but…
Sid…
it’s happening again.
What are you talking about?
Some idiot in a Ghostface mask.
Three attacks so far. One dead.
Something about this one just feels different.
Are you okay?
I’m fine, you know me.
Yeah.
I do. That’s why I’m asking.
I’m fine.
I just…
want you to be safe up there Do you have a gun?
I’m Sidney fucking Prescott. Of course I have a gun.
Good. That’s good.
Does Gale know?
No, she’s my next call.
But, Sid, promise me:
No matter what you hear or what you see on the news, don’t come here.
No offense, Dewey. I have no intention of ever setting foot in that town again.
Good.
Dewey…
whoever this killer’s after, I’m glad they have you to protect them.
You be safe, okay?
Will do.
It’s good to hear your voice.
You, too, Sid.
Come on. Get it together, Dewey.
Probably shouldn’t have sent the smiley face.
Holy shit. He came.
I’ve decided to temporarily assist you in your investigation.
Thank you.
Look, just because that guy showered doesn’t mean he should have a gun.
How do you know so much about Stab?
Runs in her family.
Randy was our uncle.
RIP.
You said to bring everybody.
Woo, suspects!
My brother would be so proud.
Hey, Martha.
Dewey! Hi!
You look…
Yeah.
How’s the wife?
Okay, Mom, we’re good. Thank you.
All right, kids, have fun.
I asked Mindy to call everybody here, because…
there’s something I have to tell you.
So let me get this straight.
You’re saying that you’re the daughter of Billy Loomis,
and, what, that one of us is the killer?
The killer told me he knew my secret.
He attacked Tara to lure me back here.
But then why immediately go and murder some douche-nozzle that was stalking Liv?
And why does it have to be one of us?
What about Deputy Dewey here? Maybe he’s the killer.
No offense.
None taken, but what’s my motive?
You got stabbed a billion times,
got dumped by your famous wife and crawled into a bottle.
I think it’s safe to say you’re on the suspect list.
Well, maybe you’re the killer.
Because that cut deep.
That douche-nozzle is connected.
I googled him. His mom is Leslie Macher.
Stu Macher’s sister.
Who’s Stu Macher?
He’s Billy Loomis’s accomplice.
A real loony tune.
Okay. Okay.
So the first three attacks are all on people related to the original killers.
Oh, my God. He’s making a requel!
A what?
Or a legacyquel. Fans are torn on the terminology.
God. Please speak English.
Remember the Stab movie that came out last year?
Oh, yeah! The one the Knives Out guy directed, right?
I actually really liked that one.
Of course you did You have terrible taste.
I hate you.
The point is, the hard-core Stab fans hated it.
You go on 4chan and Dreadit,
all they’re talking about is how Stab 8 pissed on their childhoods.
How they crammed in social commentary just to elevate it.
How the main character’s a Mary Sue.
What’s a Mary Sue?
You really don’t want to know.
What’s wrong with elevated horror?
I mean, Jordan Peele fucking rules.
Obviously, but that’s not Stab.
Real Stab movies are meta slasher whodunits, full stop.
Come on, it’s just a movie.
No, it’s not.
To some people, the original is their favorite thing in the world.
The movie that made them love horror.
That Mom or Dad showed them when they were ten that bonded them together.
And God help anyone who slightly fucks with that special memory.
Who makes a movie they think disrespects it.
It sounds like our killer is writing his own version of Stab 8,
but doing it as a requel.
Which is?
See, you can’t just reboot a franchise from scratch anymore.
The fans won’t stand for it.
Black Christmas, Child’s Play, Flatliners…
that shit doesn’t work.
But you can’t just do a straight sequel, either.
You got to build something new.
But not too new, or the Internet goes bug-fucking nuts.
It has to be part of an ongoing story line,
even if the story shouldn’t have been ongoing in the first place.
New main characters, yes,
but supported by and related to legacy characters.
Not quite a reboot, not quite a sequel.
Like the new Halloween, Saw, Terminator, Jurassic Park, Ghostbusters…
fuck, even Star Wars!
It always, always goes back to the original!
Are you telling me that I’m caught in the middle of fan-fucking-fiction?
Not just in the middle, Sam.
You’re the star.
So, not to put too fine a point on it,
but, according to requel rules…
who’s next?
Going by the pattern,
whoever it is has to be connected to someone that came before.
I’m starting to regret coming here.
Jesus, my mom was a character in one of them.
No one cares about the shitty inferior sequels, Wes. You’re safe.
With Randy as our uncle, though, you and I are probably screwed.
Wait. What?
Or you’re the killer,
and this whole elaborate monologue is just to cover your tracks.
I think it’s pretty clear who the killer is at this point.
Who?
You.
It makes perfect requel sense.
That actually does make a lot of sense.
Yeah.
Fuck this.
Meet you back at the motel.
Sam, wait.
Sam, wait.
The first fucking rule of these movies is don’t split up!
The nerve of that girl, right?
I’m really not in the mood right now.
Sam, Sam, Sam.
There is a killer on the loose.
He’s threatening you He’s threatening your sister.
Are you gonna run away from who you are like you always do,
or are you gonna use it?
I’m not like you.
Really?
And how else are you gonna survive?
I say accept who you are,
let’s get out there, find out who’s doing this,
and cut some fucking throats!
No!
And extra edamame. Please.
Thank you. I’ll be there in ten minutes.
Bye.
That you, tiger?
Jesus!
Are you being safe out there, honey?
To the point that all my friends mock me, yes.
Good boy.
What’s for dinner?
Sushi I was just leaving to pick it up.
Why don’t you just Postmates it?
It gets all smooshy by the time it’s here.
I know you hate that.
Go take a shower. I’ll be back soon.
Can you put this away for me?
Yes.
Love you.
Love you.
Lock the door.
I will.
Sheriff Hicks.
Hello, Sheriff Judy.
Who is this?
I think you know.
I’m a fan of scary movies. And knives.
What’s your favorite scary movie?
I prefer animated films and musicals.
Why are you doing this?
I’ll tell you all about it I’m calling to turn myself in.
I think that’s a great idea.
We’ll sit down at the station, and I’ll tell you about the two people I’ve killed.
You’ve only killed one person.
By the time I see you, I’ll have gutted your baby boy.
Fuck you!
Pick up, Wes!
This is Sheriff Hicks. I need units to converge on my house ASAP.
Copy that. We’re on it.
Can’t get him on the phone, can you?
He must be busy.
How do I know you’re anywhere near him?
Ever seen the movie Psycho?
Please…
don’t hurt my boy.
Why not?
He’s a good kid.
Is he, now?
He never hurt anyone.
That’s not enough.
Please! I’ll do anything!
You’re not gonna make it in time, Sheriff Judy.
Wes!
I’m coming!
Wes!
Help!
Help!
Okay.
Mom?
Mom?
Fuck… you!
Miss, you can’t be here You can’t be here.
No, I’m sorry I know her son.
Her son, Wes. Is he…
I’m sorry.
I’m sorry.
Excuse me.
Oh, my God.
You’re…
Well, you’re you.
Last time I checked.
Are you okay? You seem like you’re having a bit of a moment.
Did you know the sheriff?
Sort of.
She didn’t like me very much.
She didn’t like me either.
I’m Samantha. Sam Carpenter.
My sister and I were attacked.
Sorry to hear that.
I’m Gale…
Riley.
Weathers. I’m Gale Weathers. Excuse me.
Gale?
A text?
You tell me the killer is back in a text?
Ow, that hurts.
Good!
You were on the air.
How do you know?
A hunch.
You look good. Are you still writing?
No time.
You were always happiest when you were writing.
Well, sir, it’s okay We’re here with Gale.
I’d give you a hand, but I can’t release anybody right now.
Couldn’t resist a good story, could you?
Don’t be an idiot, Dewey. I’m here because I was worried about you.
Okay, yes. My producers wanted me to cover this, for obvious reasons,
but 90% is because of you.
Well, I feel 90% better.
Don’t be so sensitive.
Since when did you care about my feelings? Especially not in the last couple years.
All right, listen. Let’s not pretend I’m the one who ended things.
No one’s pretending, Gale. I remember what happened.
Why aren’t you in uniform?
I retired.
Since when?
Since they asked me to.
Dewey.
I don’t need your pity, Gale.
I made my choices. So did you.
It was my turn. It was a great opportunity.
You said you’d try.
And I did.
For two whole months!
Listen, if you want to make me feel worse than I already do, good luck.
The mornings aren’t so bad, because I get to see you.
Pretend I’m still back there in New York.
But then I remember…
that I couldn’t hack it. I left in the middle of the night…
like a coward.
Why wouldn’t you tell me that then?
It would have mattered.
You are a lot of things, Dewey…
but you are not a coward.
You just…
You just were meant to be in Woodsboro.
And you weren’t?
Promise me you’ll leave as soon as you can.
You know I can’t promise that.
I’m sorry about Judy.
Yeah, me too.
But she’ll make a great chapter in your next book.
And don’t even get me started on Ghostface’s signature new weapon.
That shit is lit.
And can we talk about the title? Stab? What, just like the original?
Just call it Stab 8. It’s fucking Stab 8. You’re not fooling anyone.
It’s such bullshit.
Where have you been? Are you okay?
Yeah, I’m fine.
You know, that Mindy girl wasn’t kidding Stab 8 is not like the others.
I mean, no connection to the other movies. No legacy characters at all.
This franchise goes off the rails with number five.
Richie, listen to me. He killed two more people. Wes and his mother.
He killed the sheriff? You can do that?
I mean, are you okay? Where are you?
I’ll call you right back.
No, Sam…
We should be out looking for him.
Who’s at the hospital?
Who’s watching my sister?
I just heard about the sheriff.
They needed me here!
Where are you going?
My sister’s in trouble!
Where Judy Hicks has just been brutally murdered.
What are you waiting for?
Drive!
Come on. Let’s go!
Hello?
Hello?
Fuck this.
Fuck!
Goddamn it!
Should you be making a phone call right now?
Please, please.
Stop!
You know we have to live through this to help her, right?
Just hold on.
Holy shit.
Goddamn it!
Richie?
What are you doing here?
Sam called. She said that…
you were in trouble.
Did you hit me with the phone?
Look out!
Richie!
Are you at the hospital?
Hello, Samantha.
No.
Richie can’t come to the phone right now.
He’s finding out what happens to people
who stick their noses in business that doesn’t concern them.
Please don’t hurt him.
I’ll tell you what. You can choose.
I’ll only kill one.
What? Tara!
Who do you want to hear die?
No, please. I’m begging you Please don’t hurt them.
Really? You can’t save your own sister?
All you have to do is say, “Kill Richie”.
No! No!
No! Tara! Don’t touch her.
Please, please, please, I’m begging you.
Or say, “Kill Tara,”
and I’ll make sure to hit all the organs I missed last time.
Fuck you!
I’m begging you. Please don’t hurt her.
Last chance to save one.
Choose.
Why are you doing this?
You want to know why, Sam?
Maybe it’s because you’re a selfish bitch
who can’t even make a decision to save the life of someone you love.
Maybe you’re too weak for this franchise.
Maybe you’re right.
Or maybe I’m just stalling for time, fuckhead.
I’ll get Richie.
Tara!
Come on, Richie.
It’s okay. I got you.
It’s gonna be all right.
Get the elevator!
Not today.
Richie.
Let’s get out of here.
Come on, hurry up.
The head.
What?
You have to shoot ’em in the head, or they always come back.
Dewey! Who gives a fuck?
I do.
No! Dewey!
Yes, today.
It’s an honor.
No!
No!
I’m sorry.
I didn’t know him well, but…
he helped me.
That’s what he did.
He helped people.
I should’ve stopped him.
If you had, my sister would be dead.
Samantha, your sister’s awake.
Gale.
Sidney.
I came as soon as I heard.
I’m so sorry.
You shouldn’t be here.
You shouldn’t be here either.
Mark and the kids are okay?
Yeah, they’re safe for now.
I’m here to make sure of that.
Come here.
How you feeling?
Every time I get attacked, they give me better painkillers.
So there’s that.
I’m sorry.
For what? You saved my life.
For not telling you sooner.
For being the reason Dad left.
You’re not the reason Dad left.
You didn’t choose where you came from Or who you came from.
I don’t blame you for that.
I blame you for leaving me too.
That’s never gonna happen again.
I know.
But why didn’t you come to me back then?
I could’ve helped.
Because…
I was scared.
Of what?
I was scared that I would turn out just like him.
So I ran.
To protect you.
From me.
Sam…
you could never be like him.
You’re so high right now.
I’m so high right now.
I’m not even gonna lie.
I love you.
I love you too.
So what do we do now?
What nobody ever does in these situations.
We’re gonna get the fuck out of Woodsboro.
That’s her?
Yeah.
Samantha?
It’s Sam.
I’m…
I know who you are.
I hope you’re okay.
Listen, I’m sorry…
You’re Billy’s daughter.
We’ll bring the car around.
Yeah. I’m his daughter.
I’m sorry if that’s weird for you.
No, no, it’s…
I’ve been through this. A lot.
You want to talk?
I appreciate it.
And I’m…
I’m really sorry about Dewey.
But I’m taking my sister away from all this.
I tried running too It doesn’t work, it always follows.
All due respect, that’s your life, not mine.
I’m not so sure about that.
What do you want from me, lady?
Hey! Watch your tone, new girl.
You know how they always say it goes back to the original?
Here’s the original.
I want your help.
Because you’re wrong, this is your life now.
Which means whoever this is will keep coming for you.
So?
So I want you to help us kill him.
You want me to help you and the host of a morning show commit murder?
Correct.
Yeah.
And I’m what in this scenario?
The bait? The helpless victim?
If the shoe fits…
You’re not helpless, Sam.
He killed your friend, he killed ours.
And I have kids, which means I won’t sleep until he’s in the ground.
Look, I’m sorry about what this has done to your lives.
But no matter what you or the killer or anyone says,
this isn’t my story.
All right! Let’s get the fuck out of town, huh?
Sorry. That’s my boyfriend, Richie.
Nice to meet… We met.
Sam, please get in the car so we never have to see these people again.
Sam…
No. We’re leaving.
That’s the only way I can protect Tara.
Okay, good luck.
You too.
Well, that went fucking horribly.
Don’t worry, I have a plan. She seems really tough.
Honestly, Sid, who gives a shit?
You said it yourself, he’s gonna go after her.
I put a tracker on her car.
You did what?
It seemed like something Gale Weathers would do.
Take that as a compliment.
I left a message for Mom I told her where we’re going.
You good back there?
Fuck, where is it?
Where’s what?
My inhaler. I usually keep an extra one.
Should we go back?
Whoa. Okay. I vote for not going back to the murder hospital.
You want to stop at a pharmacy?
I’d need a prescription.
But I left an extra one at Amber’s Her house is on the way.
No… no.
I’d be in and out.
Could you hold out till Modesto?
I don’t think so.
Okay, what’s the address?
123 No Fucking Way Lane.
Richie, she needs it.
And I need to keep all the blood inside my body. So do you.
Richie, please.
It’s okay.
Okay, yeah. Fuck. What’s the goddamn address?
Hey, thanks for coming.
Keep pouring, Wheeler. Thank you.
Hey.
To Wes!
Beautiful son of a bitch.
We love you, buddy!
Shots, really? This is supposed to be a memorial.
Well, this is how I mourn
and distract myself from the looming specter of Death.
Hey, we’re low on beer.
There’s more in the basement I’ll go get some.
What the fuck, Mindy? Jesus!
That was a test. And you failed.
Never go off on your own with a masked killer around.
You’re the one that said we needed more beer.
And you should have asked me to come with you.
You know what else you shouldn’t do when there’s a masked killer around?
What?
Follow someone into a dark, creepy basement alone.
I mean…
how do you know I’m not the killer?
Because I am.
I’m not, actually.
But let that be a lesson Don’t trust anyone.
Then how can I trust you when you say you’re not the killer?
Exactly.
You’re learning.
Now let’s go back upstairs.
You first.
Very good.
I think I’m ready.
I mean, I think we should.
Like now. You want to go upstairs?
Like… Like upstairs?
Uh-huh. Right now.
Don’t take this the wrong way, but I think I have to pass on that.
What?
Why?
You know, I’m not like entirely sure that you’re not the…
killer.
“Don’t take this the wrong way”?
No, no, look. I’m almost 100% certain that you are not, but…
the safest option is to be down here
with all the people…
Fuck you.
And the potential witnesses.
That is a completely valid emotional response to have.
That too.
Fucking asshole.
Good job.
Fuck you, Mindy.
If I hadn’t have written that book about your mother,
none of this would’ve happened.
Gale.
I started all of this.
No, you didn’t.
Billy Loomis started this, and we’re gonna end it.
After tonight, no more books, no more movies, no more fucking Ghostface.
Don’t you know the rules?
What rules?
There are specific rules to successfully survive a horror movie.
For instance, Number One: You can never have sex.
Don’t do it. Don’t go outside after her.
She’s not texting me back.
Because she’s probably dead.
Jesus, Mindy. That’s my girlfriend, and I love her.
Was your girlfriend.
You’re just gonna sit and watch a movie about our uncle getting stabbed?
It calms me down, okay?
I’m also gonna smoke some weed and possibly hook up with Frances.
Have fun.
Oh, my God, at least take some sort of weapon.
Here you go.
All right.
What?
Liv?
Liv?
All right. Okay, yeah, no.
Shit!
Fuck!
Please, please, please.
Whoa! Stop! Wait!
Perfect. She’s having a party.
Who has a party in the middle of a killing spree? I’m aborting the plan.
No, we’re already here. I’ll go in quickly and get it. I’ll be back in five.
I’m coming too.
If you think I’m waiting out here just to get murdered,
you’re out of your mind.
Tara!
What are you doing out of the hospital? Should you even be up and around?
I need my spare inhaler.
Why? Where are you going?
It’s fine, don’t tell me I get it. Just be safe, okay?
I think it’s in my room.
All right, everyone! Thanks for coming, but the party’s over!
Time to go!
No!
But it’s so early!
Let’s go.
Hey, hey, hey! Hello! Can we cut the music, please?
Hi… Gen Z. How are you?
Both Sam and Tara here have been attacked by the killer twice.
Now they’re here, which makes this place a huge murder target, so…
if I were you, I would probably leave.
Okay, I tried to be nice. Get the fuck out!
Please get the fuck out.
Sincerely, get the fuck out.
Buzzkill!
Thank you. Thank you all. I’m saving your life. I promise.
Thanks, teens.
Thank you so much.
Great, thank you for leaving the cup Thank you.
Saving your life.
I’m saving your life.
Saving your life, thank you.
And Number Three:
Never, ever, ever, under any circumstances,
say, “I’ll be right back”.
‘Cause you won’t be back.
Somebody’s goofy-ass dad’s kicking us out.
Goddamn it.
Thank you.
Thanks, guys, have a good night.
You have my number. Bye.
Bye.
Hi.
Is there any beer left? There’s none in the kitchen.
Yes, Richie, there’s beer in the basement.
Right behind you. Basement.
Yeah.
Do you want to come with me?
No. But you were right to ask.
Yeah.
Okay, I’ll be right back.
Yeah. Yeah.
Well, he’s dead.
The goddamn fucking Uber canceled on me!
Great. Now I can’t have sex and I can’t get a ride home.
Could this night get any shittier?
Liv, where’s my brother?
What? I don’t know, Mindy. Probably off accusing everyone of being the killer!
He actually went looking for you.
I didn’t see him. Okay?
Why are you looking at me like that?
Just revising my suspect list.
Fuck this!
Are you afraid of me, Mindy?
You think I did something to your brother? Huh?
You think I’m gonna… cut you up?
A little bit now… yeah.
I thought you said I was too boring to be the killer.
Maybe that’s the twist.
What do you think, huh? You’re the expert.
You know what eventually happens to the expert?
What?
Enjoy your stupid movie.
Fucking psycho.
They stopped.
Gas station?
No.
Oh, shit.
What?
Oh, shit. How far are we?
Too far.
Damn it.
Tara, we’re leaving!
Hello.
You need to get out of that house right now.
How do you know where I am?
You’re in Stu Macher’s house, where your dad and Stu killed everyone.
Someone planned to get you there You need to get the fuck out, Sam!
No, Jamie. Watch out.
Watch out, Jamie.
You know he’s around.
What?
There he is.
Come on, man, turn around! Turn around! Dude!
I told you. I told you, he’s around the corner. Jamie.
Look behind you.
No, Randy, look behind you.
Come on, man, turn around!
Dude, what are you doing? You can do it!
These are your rules! Own that shit.
Behind you! Turn around.
Look behind…
Oh, shit!
That’s a lot of blood, Sam.
No, Mindy, stay with me.
What did you do to her?
Nothing.
No, I didn’t do anything.
The killer, he…
Is she okay?
What the fuck?
Richie, where the fuck were you?
I went into the basement to get beer.
You went to the basement alone?
I asked her to come with me! She said no!
Fuck!
Stay the fuck back.
Jesus Christ!
I was with Tara, but the rest of you were wandering around.
One of you is the fucking killer!
Fuck you, Amber. Fuck you!
Why is there blood on your hands?
What?
I found Chad. I found Chad and he’s…
Chad?
You’re fucking lying.
No.
You’re the killer.
No, I’m not.
Liv, stop.
Fuck you!
Liv, just stop!
Fuck you, Amber. I’m not the fucking killer!
I know.
Welcome to Act Three.
Run!
Holy shit!
Sam, come on!
Run! Go, go, go! Go!
Oh, my God… Tara!
Wait, no, Sam.
She has a gun.
There are always two killers.
Sam, please put the knife down.
Look, I think…
I think the other killer might be Tara.
What?
She’s the one that brought us here and you two have been estranged for years.
I mean…
how well do you really know her?
Better than I know you.
Sam, wait. Sam!
Sounds about right.
You ready?
For this? Never.
Here we go.
Help me, help me! He stabbed me!
What do you think?
Trap.
Fuck it.
Ow!
Gale! Gale!
Wait. Let me see.
You got to go to the hospital.
No.
You said we were gonna finish this. Go finish it, Sidney.
Gale.
For Dewey.
Anyone hiding, killer or not, you have five seconds to show yourself!
Tara.
Oh, my God.
Sam.
Sam, please.
Hello, Sidney!
Hello there. Where’d you go?
This isn’t Amber. I’m the other one.
There’s two of you. Again.
I’ve seen this movie before.
Not this movie, Sidney.
You really need some new material.
I got you here, didn’t I?
You might actually be the most derivative one of all.
I mean, Christ, the same house?
Maybe so. But you forgot the first rule of surviving a Stab movie.
Never answer the…
I’m bored.
Wait!
Put your hands up! Show me your hands! What are you doing in there?
Hiding from murderers.
I told you to come out!
I’m not gonna come out! You’re shooting everything!
Holy shit, it’s Ghostface!
Richie! Gun. Get the gun.
Kind of hard since you shot me in the leg.
Yes! Yes!
Shoot him!
Thank God you’re okay.
‘Cause I really,
really wanted to be the one to kill you.
Sit the fuck down, Prescott!
I can’t believe this worked.
I know. It’s a bummer it’s me.
But it really was the best choice for the movie.
This isn’t a fucking movie!
No. But it will be.
That’s the point, right, Amber?
Right, hon!
Third Act bloodbath, check. Killers revealed, check.
Time for the big finale!
Richie…
Okay. Okay.
Let’s get ’em into the kitchen.
Let’s go, bitch!
Someone has to save the franchise.
You see, no one has made a great Stab movie since the first one.
Not really.
Hey, baby, you want to go get the very ex-Mrs. Riley?
Yeah, I do.
Hey, hey!
Whoa… whoa.
Sidney Prescott.
You know…
I’m a really big fan.
Go fuck yourself.
You see the last Stab movie?
Not really a fan of scary movies.
That checks out. Anyway, it sucked balls.
Because nobody takes the true fans seriously. Not really.
They just laugh at us, and why?
Because we love something?
We’re just a fucking joke to them?
How can fandom be toxic?
It’s about love!
They don’t fucking understand that these movies are important to people.
Richie…
But we’re gonna help them!
Hollywood’s totally fucking out of ideas,
so we decided we’d give them some new source material to follow.
Bring it back to basics.
Because that’s how you make a great Stab movie, Sam.
“Based on actual events”.
Gale.
Sit the fuck down!
Back up.
You did all this just to make me the hero of your fucked-up movie?
Sweetie, you’re not the hero.
You’re the villain.
The daughter of Billy Loomis who sees fucked-up visions of her dead dad.
Sidney Prescott killed your father.
You…
did all this just to get her back to Woodsboro.
You know what the biggest problem with the Stab movies is?
There’s no Michael Myers or Jason Voorhees.
No bad guy to keep coming back.
But the illegitimate daughter of the original mastermind?
Now that’s a fucking villain.
How did you know?
About your father?
It’s a small town and your mom’s a drunk!
I met Richie on the Stab subreddit.
I’ve been obsessed ever since my parents bought this house.
We realized pretty quickly we had similar ideas.
Wasn’t that hard for me to find you in Modesto.
It wasn’t that hard for me to fuck you, either.
But I guess being a sexually available woman
is supposed to be empowering these days.
Fuck you!
Well, now you’re just quoting the original.
But it wouldn’t work with just you, Sam.
See, we had to bring the legacy characters back to make it matter.
Can’t have a bona fide Halloween without Jamie Lee!
Nope!
Dewey had to die to make it real.
To show that this wasn’t just some bullshit,
cash-in, run-of-the-mill sequel.
Because our movie has fucking stakes!
‘Cause anyone can die in a requel.
No!
Goddamn it. Whoa, whoa!
No, hey! Sit the fuck down.
I’m so sorry, Sid.
We can’t let you live, either I mean, surviving this many times…
that would just be ridiculous.
This time the fans are gonna be the ones who win.
That about cover it?
Nailed it, baby.
Get Tara out of the closet We got to start staging the bodies!
Stay with me, Sid. Stay with me.
You really should’ve listened to Dewey.
He nailed it in one! Dude, look at the love interest!
Are you fucking stupid?
I even had you convinced it could be your sister.
She’s not here.
What the fuck do you mean, she’s not here?
She’s not here!
I untied her.
Guess you’re not as persuasive as you thought.
That’s for you.
Yeah, like your gimpy little sister’s gonna make a difference.
She’s our fucking pincushion at this point.
Amber! Fan out. She couldn’t have gotten far.
I can’t find her!
Amber?
Sam! Where you going? Your big scene’s coming up!
Fucking kill you!
The fucking hand sanitizer?
No, no, no, it’s not my fault! It’s not my fault!
Let me guess, the movies made you do it?
No, it was the message boards! I was radicalized.
By movie fans?
Yes, they’re so mad!
Please, it’s not my fault I’m just a dumb kid.
I wanted to be a part of something.
“A part of something”? You killed my best friend!
Yeah, and he died like a pussy.
That’s the thing about slashers, Sam.
So many blood trails.
This one yours?
Only one way to find out!
I was the last thing Dewey saw before he died too.
I can’t believe I get to do you both.
No last-minute saves this time Your story’s over!
Time to pass the torch.
It’s all yours, bitch!
You want to do the honors?
This one’s yours.
No, stop, stop, stop! I’m sorry about Dewey.
Fuck you.
Enjoy that torch.
Stop…
fucking up…
my ending!
Sam?
Sam!
Okay.
What are you gonna do now, huh?
Make a scary phone call to me?
Pop out of that closet in a Ghostface mask?
No.
Because you’re the villain!
And the villain dies at the end.
Those are the rules.
I’m introducing a new rule.
And what would that be? Huh?
Well?
Never fuck with the daughter of a serial killer.
What about… my ending?
Here it comes.
Careful, they always come back.
Okay, then.
I still prefer The Babadook.
Are you okay?
Are you good?
I’m so sorry.
Excuse me.
Excuse me, sir.
Hey.
Hey.
She’s gonna be okay.
Can you take us to a different hospital this time?
Of course.
You ready to go?
I’ll be right back, yeah?
Your vitals look good.
You sit tight for a draft, okay?
Sidney. Gale.
Thank you both.
For everything.
Are you gonna be all right?
I’ll survive I always do.
You were right…
about not running.
Sorry about that.
How are you doing?
Ask me in a few days.
But at least I know what I’m gonna write about.
What’s that?
Not this.
Those fuckers can die in anonymity.
But maybe something about a good man who used to be the sheriff here once.
I’d like to read that story.
Can I ask you a weird question?
Yeah.
Am I gonna be okay?
Eventually.
Hey.
Wait. Sam, Sam!
Thank you.
Well, you’re not going anywhere without me.
Don’t worry.
I’m gonna hold your hand all the way there.
I can take care of her and her sister.
She’s all ready for transportation.
25 years ago, almost to the day, in this very house a tragic story ended.
Tonight, a new chapter came to a close.
Police do not have a lot of information right now, as they are still collecting evidence.
As you can see, this is a very active crime scene.
An unknown number of fatalities, several injuries, some people being taken off by ambulance right now as we speak.
This is a developing story…Hello?
Hello.
Is Cristina there?
No, she’s not available. May I take a message?
Sorry, I’m a friend of hers from group… Oh, shit.
From her shit?
Look, just tell her I’m from group. I’m Charlie. She’s got my number.
She goes to your group?
I shouldn’t have…
Just tell her that Charlie called.
I will do exactly that, Charlie, once you tell me what kind of group we’re talking about.
Is it AA? NA?
You sound exactly like she describes you.
She talks about me in group?
I don’t think I can really talk about that.
What does she say about me?
She loves you very much.
What does she love about me?
She loves that you’re creative.
You love art and TV and movies.
Lots of people love movies.
Yeah, but she says you love scary movies and that you guys have that in common.
She’s proud of making a fan out of you.
She is?
Yeah.
She told me the other day, she wonders… what’s your favorite scary movie?
The Babadook. It’s an amazing meditation on motherhood and grief.
Isn’t that a little fancy pants?
Well, it’s elevated horror.
Uh-huh. What does that mean, “Elevated horror”?
It’s scary but with complex emotional and thematic underpinnings.
It’s not just some schlocky, cheeseball nonsense with wall-to-wall jump scares.
Sounds kind of boring to me.
Have you ever seen Stab?
Once, I think.
At a sleepover when I was, like, 12.
You live in Woodsboro and you don’t know Stab?
Your mother loves that movie. She talks about it all the time in group.
How well do you remember the original?
I don’t know. I mean, it was super ’90s.
It was really over-lit and everyone had weird hair.
Do you remember the beginning?
Not really.
It started with a kill scene, right? They always started with a kill scene.
Yeah, that’s right. That’s right.
It’s a girl at home, alone.
She answers a wrong number and starts talking with the killer who makes her play a game.
Would you like to play a game…
Tara?
Systems armed.
This isn’t fucking funny, Amber.
I told you, this isn’t Amber.
Amber’s looking particularly fetching tonight.
She really shouldn’t leave her phone lying around for anyone to clone.
What do you want?
I told you, I want to play a game.
Stab movie trivia, three rounds.
You call the cops, she dies You get a question wrong, she dies.
Her parents aren’t home. I can be in that room in 15 seconds.
You want a warmup question?
I told you I don’t know these movies!
Ask me about something I do know.
Ask me about It Follows. Ask me about Hereditary.
Ask me about The Witch.
In the first Stab movie,
what Woodsboro native was introduced as the franchise’s main character?
It’s Sidney Prescott!
It’s Sidney Prescott and she lived on Elm.
Correct. You see, you’re gonna do great at this.
Okay, question one…
No, I got that one right. It should count.
Anyone could have gotten that one right Sidney’s in every movie but the last one.
Question one:
Who wrote the original book that the Stab movies are based on?
The chick from TV!
“The chick from TV” is not gonna cut it, Tara.
Gale Weathers!
It is Gale Weathers, you motherfucker!
Correct. Amber might live to see the sunrise.
Question two: Who played the dumb bitch at the beginning of Stab 1
who answers the phone and gets carved up by the killer?
Fuck you.
Is that the answer you’re going with?
A non-answer counts as a wrong answer, Tara.
Time’s running out.
Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock…
Heather Graham!
Correct! You pulled that one out.
Now for the final question:
Who was the killer in Stab 1?
I know this one, you fuck.
It’s Billy Loomis!
He was Sidney’s boyfriend, and he was played by Luke Wilson,
and I got you, asshole!
I got it! I got it right!
Oh, I’m sorry, Tara, but that’s just not correct.
What?
No, no, it is. It is. That is right.
The correct answer is Billy Loomis and Stu Macher.
There are two killers in the original Stab.
I’m afraid someone’s got to die now.
No, no, no. Amber, I’m coming.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Systems armed.
The police are on their way, asshole!
All systems disarmed.
Systems armed.
All systems disarmed.
Oh, my God. No.
Systems armed.
All systems disarmed Systems armed.
All systems disarmed.
Systems armed.
Hello?
Bonus question, Tara.
Please stop.
Do you think I made it inside your house before you could rearm?
Help!
Excuse me, miss?
What’d you just take?
Your boner pills.
Good luck getting it up now.
You…
You are my boner pills.
No. No.
You okay?
Yes.
You don’t have to check on me all the time I’m not breakable.
Yeah, this. I know.
Shit.
Sam?
Hey. What’s going on?
Tara… was attacked.
What? Is she…
She’s alive, but in bad shape.
She was…
stabbed.
Stabbed? What the fuck?
She made it through surgery and the doctor said it went well.
She’s resting now.
I know you guys aren’t on the best terms, but…
I’m on my way.
She’s gonna be okay, Sam. We’ll see you soon.
Hey, wait, Wes!
Yeah?
Do they know who did this?
It’s probably better if you just come here.
Wes.
She said it was someone in a fucking Ghostface mask.
My sister was attacked.
I gotta go.
Wait, hey! I’m going with you.
No, Richie…
No, Sam. I’m coming with you.
Okay.
Okay. Yeah.
Attention, Panthers. A reminder that all classes and school activities
are canceled tomorrow due to public safety concerns.
That was Sam.
She’s coming?
Yeah.
Watch everything get worse.
Listen, all I’m saying is, with everything going on right now,
I think it’s time we take our relationship to the next, most intimate level.
He wants me to accept his Find My Fam request.
It’s the smartest option with a would-be killer on the loose.
You know exactly where I am and I know exactly where you are.
Aw, you can stalk me like a jealous boyfriend.
And you can stalk me like a jealous boyfriend.
Is this because you two aren’t having sex yet?
You actually bring up a very good point. Not that I want to sound
like a stereotypical jock trying to get into his girlfriend’s pants.
Great!
Don’t do it, Liv. There’s a psycho out there.
You make yourself harder to find.
Delete social media, tape over your phone camera, disable GPS.
Yes, thank you very much, Edward Snowden.
Actually, your mother just interrogated me about Tara’s attempted murder,
which was very fun.
I’m sure she’s asking everybody. I mean, Ghostface is back.
The press still isn’t saying Ghostface.
My mom doesn’t want to cause a panic.
It’ll get out by the second or third killing.
Jesus, Mindy, there wasn’t a first killing Tara’s alive.
That means she could still die.
What the fuck?
Or the killer could come back for her.
Fuck! Mindy, come on.
I’m just telling you, arm up, okay? Pepper spray, check. Taser, check.
Girlfriend repellent, check.
Nice. Thank you.
Oh, shit. Is that… Vince?
Wait. The creep you hooked up with last summer?
Yeah, he worked with me and Tara.
He worked with Tara?
He’s been stalking my Instagram the last couple weeks,
posting the creepiest shit.
Probably time to introduce him to Hobbs and Shaw.
Maybe not the best idea to incite violence right in front of the sheriff.
Looks like he’s leaving.
Thanks anyway, boys.
Tara says she fought back hard. You’ve got bruises.
From football practice.
Oh, sure.
Tara’s awake. She just texted.
I’m going to the hospital. You guys coming?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I can’t, but I’ll meet you guys later.
All right.
I’ve actually never seen Stab.
You’ve never seen Stab?
Not even the one that came out last year?
I’ve never seen Gone With the Wind either,
but I don’t consider it like a huge hole in my cinematic education.
Most of the Stab movies are based on things that happened here.
Define “things”.
Things like…
a guy named Billy Loomis and his friend carved up a bunch of high-school kids
while wearing this Halloween ghost mask.
You mean like in Halloween?
No. Not like in Halloween.
Sounds a lot like Halloween.
All right, it’s a little like Halloween.
And every decade or so, some idiot gets the bright idea
to put on the mask, kill his friends, and get famous, too.
The last time it happened was in 2011.
And we came here voluntarily?
Well, I got to make sure Tara’s okay.
Yes, of course.
And I got to make sure we don’t get sliced up by some lunatic
who saw Friday the 13th and thought, “You know what?
That Jason guy, he’s got some pretty solid ideas”.
Can I just ask you one question, though?
Yeah.
Do you have any idea why
someone wearing that mask would want to kill your sister?
No.
How are you feeling?
You came.
Of course I came.
This is my boyfriend, Richie.
It’s so nice to meet you. I’m so sorry if I’m intruding.
Nice to meet you, too.
Hi.
Hi.
Thank you for calling.
Of course.
Look at your hair! I like it.
These are Chad and Mindy, the twins. And Wes.
I used to babysit them all.
Which is always how I like to be introduced.
And Amber. Hey.
Hi. Nice to see you.
Hi. I’m Richie.
Hi.
Where’s Mom?
She’s stuck at a conference in London.
She called me earlier.
Yeah, for all of ten minutes.
Look, guys, Tara’s really tired. Maybe we should just give her some space.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Not you, Sam.
I want you to stay.
Okay.
But the rest.
Yeah.
If it’s okay with you, I could sleep here tonight.
I’d really like that.
Okay.
Do you have your extra inhaler?
Yeah, I’ll be fine.
Okay.
Honey? Okay, I’ll just be right outside.
Thank you.
Bye.
Sam, I was so scared.
I know.
It’s okay.
So what is she like, the sister?
Sam? Sam is so cool.
You only say that because she let you wear Pokemon onesies to bed for a year.
That’s true. That’s a true statement.
No, trust me, Sam is not cool.
Her dad left her mom. Walks right out when Tara’s eight, Sam’s 13.
Sam started acting out, getting in trouble with the cops.
And then, on Sam’s 18th birthday, she leaves.
Ghosts them all.
Maybe Sam’s changed. I just don’t want to see Tara hurt again.
So what, you’re protecting Tara from her own sister now?
Well, someone has to.
Okay, so no guys are good enough for her and now her family’s off-limits, too?
Mm, motive.
“If I can’t have her, no one can”.
What?
We all know you have a crush on Tara.
Okay. Come on, Mindy.
But we’re all suspects.
Except maybe Liv.
Thank you.
You’re way too boring to be a psycho.
Yo, Liv. You want a real drink?
Or are you happy sitting at this kids’ table?
Listen up, Uglier Michael Myers, it was a summer fling. It meant nothing.
Was I talking to you?
I don’t care who you’re talking to.
Liv, let’s go.
Don’t talk to her!
I don’t want to hear your voice.
Shut your mouth.
Better shut the fuck up.
Get out of here or I’m calling the cops.
Go!
I’ll see you soon, sweetheart.
Hey, man, fuck you.
You kids, too! Let’s go!
Did you see that shit?
Fuck this bar, man.
Fuck you.
Fuck it!
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
Is that you, pretty boy? Huh?
Get out of my fucking car!
Hey.
You okay?
Yeah.
Just a bad dream.
What are you watching?
Stab is on Netflix.
What? I want to be prepared.
I got to go find something to eat.
Yeah, okay.
How you doing, Sam?
Antipsychotics aren’t working as well as they used to, are they?
Fuck you.
You can’t run from who you are, Sam.
I’m just trying to help.
Hey, when are you gonna tell her why all this is happening?
Hello.
Hello, Samantha.
Who is this?
Someone who knows your little family secret.
You’re the fuck who hurt my sister?
She’s not the only one I’m gonna hurt.
I had to get you to come back here somehow, didn’t I?
You want to fuck with me, asshole?
I’m right here. Come and get me.
With pleasure.
Help!
Help! Help!
Somebody help me, he’s trying to kill me!
What’s going on? You’re okay.
Somebody tried to kill me in the break room!
I’ve got a body outside a bar on Main, and then you get attacked here.
You said the call came from Amber’s number?
So? We know he called on my phone before when he attacked Tara.
Or, and I’m just spit-balling here… you’re the killer.
And where were you when all this happened?
I was… watching Netflix.
Ooh, yeah. Super-solid alibi, bro.
So where were you?
I was questioning Amber and her friends at the sheriff’s station.
Yeah, I came as soon as I heard.
But, you know, the Netflix alibi is good, too.
Both of you, stop it.
You’re gonna put more cops on her room, right?
Yes.
And I can move you to a private floor.
Deputy Vinson knows what he’s doing, you’ll be safe.
Like we’ve been so far?
Samantha, let’s step outside.
Nice to see you, Deputy Hicks.
So many fun memories.
It’s “Sheriff” Hicks.
I remember you, too…
and all the trouble you used to cause your family.
Your presence here is not helping.
So maybe when the sun comes up,
you and your boyfriend can hit the road
and leave it to people who actually care about this community.
Well, she remains a delight.
Are you okay?
Would you mind giving us a second? I need to talk to Tara.
Come on, Netflix, let’s go.
Do you remember when Dad left?
Parts, sure.
I was eight. What does that have to do with anything?
It has to do with it.
Do you remember how…
Mom used to keep those boxes up in the attic?
Well, I was up there once…
When I was 13, looking for Christmas presents.
And I found these old diaries that she kept from high school.
Sam, what is…
Please.
I have to do this.
So I found these old diaries.
And I knew it was wrong, but I read some anyway
because Mom got pregnant with me in high school,
and I thought it could be cool to find out how she and Dad got together.
How romantic it must have been.
So I read some.
Only it wasn’t romantic.
Mom was dating Dad, but…
she was in love with this other guy…
and he got her pregnant.
She told Dad it was his, and that’s why he proposed senior year.
Sam, what are you talking about?
And I’m sitting there, in this attic…
and I’m 13…
and I just found out my dad isn’t my dad.
So I go find Mom in her bedroom, and I’m screaming at her
and shoving this diary in her face,
and I didn’t even realize…
that Dad was standing right behind me.
He didn’t know.
He found out right then from me.
He left that night.
I’m the reason he left.
No.
No, Sam…
Mom never forgave me.
Then she made me promise never to tell you because you were so young.
And that’s why I changed
and I got distant and weird with you.
And I went out and I started doing every drug that I could get my hands on
until I couldn’t take it anymore and I left town.
I just couldn’t be around you anymore, Tara.
Not only because I destroyed our family that night, but because…
those diaries told me who my real father was.
It was Billy Loomis.
And somebody knows, and I think that’s why you got hurt.
And I’m so fucking sorry that I never told you and then I ran away.
I’m so sorry.
Get out.
Tara.
You’re gone for five years…
Five whole years.
And then I get stabbed and you want to come back
and drop all this shit on me?
I thought I was protecting you.
Protecting me from what?
The truth?
No. No, I… Please, Tara.
Sam.
Sam, I need you to get the fuck out.
I’m so sorry.
Sam.
Please.
Get the fuck out!
Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay, it’s me.
Were you listening at the door?
No, no, of course not.
Okay, yeah, I was listening at the door.
It doesn’t freak you out…
that my real father was a serial killer?
I mean…
yeah.
A great deal, yeah.
Okay, well, then go I get it.
I just got to stay and figure it out.
I’m not leaving you here, Sam.
You know that part in horror movies
where you want to yell at the characters to be smart and get the fuck out?
This is that part, Richie.
You should get the fuck out.
But I’m staying.
I love you.
You’re such a dumbass.
I’m such a dumbass.
So…
your sister won’t talk to you.
The police aren’t gonna help.
What’s our next move?
We go talk to an expert.
A few temperatures here. Tuesday, Wednesday in the mid-50s,
and then finally we’ll see those mid-60s returning into next week.
And just one night after a local teen was attacked in her home
by an assailant in a Ghostface costume,
Sheriff Judy Hicks has now confirmed
two more late-night attacks that have left Woodsboro reeling.
The first victim, Vincent Schneider, was found dead
behind the Corner Pocket Pool Hall.
A second victim, as yet unnamed, was attacked
inside Woodsboro General Hospital,
but she escaped without injuries.
Needless to say, Woodsboro is on high alert today…
Live from Studio 1-A in Rockefeller Plaza…
Good morning. I’m Gale Weathers.
Before we dive in, I want to tell you a little story
that happened on the way to the studio this morning.
I stopped to get a bacon, egg and cheese at a bodega,
already a quintessentially New York…
Go away!
Sorry to bother you, Mr. Riley!
We just want to ask you a few questions.
I don’t give interviews.
We’re not looking for an interview.
Give me one good reason why I should talk to you.
I’m Billy Loomis’s daughter.
That’s a terrible reason for me to talk to you.
My name is Samantha Carpenter.
I was attacked last night at the hospital.
The night before that, my sister was stabbed seven times.
I know you know what that’s like.
I’m just trying to protect my family.
Five minutes. That’s all I’m asking.
I’ll give you two minutes.
I’m missing a show I like.
If I ever threaten to get bangs, stage an intervention.
Gale Weathers.
Weren’t you two…
Yeah.
Who’s he?
This is Richie, my boyfriend.
How long have you known him?
Six months?
Did he know who your dad was when you met?
Express any interest in Woodsboro or the Ghostface killings?
What the hell are you talking about?
Your killer’s obsessed with the Stab movies, right?
Well, there are certain rules to surviving a Stab movie.
Believe me, I know.
Rule number one:
Never trust the love interest.
They seem sweet, caring, supportive.
Then welcome to act 3, where they’re trying to rip your head off.
I was with Sam in Modesto when Tara was attacked.
And let me guess, you were just in the other room,
conveniently unaccounted for when she was attacked at the hospital.
Do I have to take this from shitty Sam Elliott over here, or what?
Rule number two:
The killer’s motive is always connected to something in the past.
I’m related to Billy.
Right, but then why kill that random Vince guy?
That’s for you to figure out.
And rule number three, and this is the most important rule:
The first victim always has a friend group that the killer is a part of.
Does your sister have a close-knit group of friends?
Yeah.
She does.
Then look for the killer there.
If you can find out why they’re doing this,
you can figure out who’s next.
So help us.
Help us figure out who is behind this.
You kidding me? I’ve been stabbed nine times.
I’ve got permanent nerve damage and a fun little limp.
You think I want to do that again?
You just said it always goes back to the past, right?
So if I’m in danger…
that means you’re in danger.
Come on.
Let’s do this together.
Your time’s up.
Jesus!
Yeah, he’s way more fun in the movies.
Okay, what’s next?
The friends.
Thanks so much for that, Kevin.
Coming up after our local weather,
the pros and cons of reuniting with old friends.
Hello?
Hey, Sid, it’s me.
Dewey?
Oh, my God. How long has it been?
I’m just trying to get a run in before I take the girls to school.
How are you?
I’m good, really good.
How are you? How’s Mark?
I think I’ll keep him.
How are things in the sheriff’s business?
They’re…
They’re fine. But, Sid…
Have you talked to Gale lately?
No. Not in a couple years.
I know things didn’t end well with you guys, but…
Sid…
it’s happening again.
What are you talking about?
Some idiot in a Ghostface mask.
Three attacks so far. One dead.
Something about this one just feels different.
Are you okay?
I’m fine, you know me.
Yeah.
I do. That’s why I’m asking.
I’m fine.
I just…
want you to be safe up there Do you have a gun?
I’m Sidney fucking Prescott. Of course I have a gun.
Good. That’s good.
Does Gale know?
No, she’s my next call.
But, Sid, promise me:
No matter what you hear or what you see on the news, don’t come here.
No offense, Dewey. I have no intention of ever setting foot in that town again.
Good.
Dewey…
whoever this killer’s after, I’m glad they have you to protect them.
You be safe, okay?
Will do.
It’s good to hear your voice.
You, too, Sid.
Come on. Get it together, Dewey.
Probably shouldn’t have sent the smiley face.
Holy shit. He came.
I’ve decided to temporarily assist you in your investigation.
Thank you.
Look, just because that guy showered doesn’t mean he should have a gun.
How do you know so much about Stab?
Runs in her family.
Randy was our uncle.
RIP.
You said to bring everybody.
Woo, suspects!
My brother would be so proud.
Hey, Martha.
Dewey! Hi!
You look…
Yeah.
How’s the wife?
Okay, Mom, we’re good. Thank you.
All right, kids, have fun.
I asked Mindy to call everybody here, because…
there’s something I have to tell you.
So let me get this straight.
You’re saying that you’re the daughter of Billy Loomis,
and, what, that one of us is the killer?
The killer told me he knew my secret.
He attacked Tara to lure me back here.
But then why immediately go and murder some douche-nozzle that was stalking Liv?
And why does it have to be one of us?
What about Deputy Dewey here? Maybe he’s the killer.
No offense.
None taken, but what’s my motive?
You got stabbed a billion times,
got dumped by your famous wife and crawled into a bottle.
I think it’s safe to say you’re on the suspect list.
Well, maybe you’re the killer.
Because that cut deep.
That douche-nozzle is connected.
I googled him. His mom is Leslie Macher.
Stu Macher’s sister.
Who’s Stu Macher?
He’s Billy Loomis’s accomplice.
A real loony tune.
Okay. Okay.
So the first three attacks are all on people related to the original killers.
Oh, my God. He’s making a requel!
A what?
Or a legacyquel. Fans are torn on the terminology.
God. Please speak English.
Remember the Stab movie that came out last year?
Oh, yeah! The one the Knives Out guy directed, right?
I actually really liked that one.
Of course you did You have terrible taste.
I hate you.
The point is, the hard-core Stab fans hated it.
You go on 4chan and Dreadit,
all they’re talking about is how Stab 8 pissed on their childhoods.
How they crammed in social commentary just to elevate it.
How the main character’s a Mary Sue.
What’s a Mary Sue?
You really don’t want to know.
What’s wrong with elevated horror?
I mean, Jordan Peele fucking rules.
Obviously, but that’s not Stab.
Real Stab movies are meta slasher whodunits, full stop.
Come on, it’s just a movie.
No, it’s not.
To some people, the original is their favorite thing in the world.
The movie that made them love horror.
That Mom or Dad showed them when they were ten that bonded them together.
And God help anyone who slightly fucks with that special memory.
Who makes a movie they think disrespects it.
It sounds like our killer is writing his own version of Stab 8,
but doing it as a requel.
Which is?
See, you can’t just reboot a franchise from scratch anymore.
The fans won’t stand for it.
Black Christmas, Child’s Play, Flatliners…
that shit doesn’t work.
But you can’t just do a straight sequel, either.
You got to build something new.
But not too new, or the Internet goes bug-fucking nuts.
It has to be part of an ongoing story line,
even if the story shouldn’t have been ongoing in the first place.
New main characters, yes,
but supported by and related to legacy characters.
Not quite a reboot, not quite a sequel.
Like the new Halloween, Saw, Terminator, Jurassic Park, Ghostbusters…
fuck, even Star Wars!
It always, always goes back to the original!
Are you telling me that I’m caught in the middle of fan-fucking-fiction?
Not just in the middle, Sam.
You’re the star.
So, not to put too fine a point on it,
but, according to requel rules…
who’s next?
Going by the pattern,
whoever it is has to be connected to someone that came before.
I’m starting to regret coming here.
Jesus, my mom was a character in one of them.
No one cares about the shitty inferior sequels, Wes. You’re safe.
With Randy as our uncle, though, you and I are probably screwed.
Wait. What?
Or you’re the killer,
and this whole elaborate monologue is just to cover your tracks.
I think it’s pretty clear who the killer is at this point.
Who?
You.
It makes perfect requel sense.
That actually does make a lot of sense.
Yeah.
Fuck this.
Meet you back at the motel.
Sam, wait.
Sam, wait.
The first fucking rule of these movies is don’t split up!
The nerve of that girl, right?
I’m really not in the mood right now.
Sam, Sam, Sam.
There is a killer on the loose.
He’s threatening you He’s threatening your sister.
Are you gonna run away from who you are like you always do,
or are you gonna use it?
I’m not like you.
Really?
And how else are you gonna survive?
I say accept who you are,
let’s get out there, find out who’s doing this,
and cut some fucking throats!
No!
And extra edamame. Please.
Thank you. I’ll be there in ten minutes.
Bye.
That you, tiger?
Jesus!
Are you being safe out there, honey?
To the point that all my friends mock me, yes.
Good boy.
What’s for dinner?
Sushi I was just leaving to pick it up.
Why don’t you just Postmates it?
It gets all smooshy by the time it’s here.
I know you hate that.
Go take a shower. I’ll be back soon.
Can you put this away for me?
Yes.
Love you.
Love you.
Lock the door.
I will.
Sheriff Hicks.
Hello, Sheriff Judy.
Who is this?
I think you know.
I’m a fan of scary movies. And knives.
What’s your favorite scary movie?
I prefer animated films and musicals.
Why are you doing this?
I’ll tell you all about it I’m calling to turn myself in.
I think that’s a great idea.
We’ll sit down at the station, and I’ll tell you about the two people I’ve killed.
You’ve only killed one person.
By the time I see you, I’ll have gutted your baby boy.
Fuck you!
Pick up, Wes!
This is Sheriff Hicks. I need units to converge on my house ASAP.
Copy that. We’re on it.
Can’t get him on the phone, can you?
He must be busy.
How do I know you’re anywhere near him?
Ever seen the movie Psycho?
Please…
don’t hurt my boy.
Why not?
He’s a good kid.
Is he, now?
He never hurt anyone.
That’s not enough.
Please! I’ll do anything!
You’re not gonna make it in time, Sheriff Judy.
Wes!
I’m coming!
Wes!
Help!
Help!
Okay.
Mom?
Mom?
Fuck… you!
Miss, you can’t be here You can’t be here.
No, I’m sorry I know her son.
Her son, Wes. Is he…
I’m sorry.
I’m sorry.
Excuse me.
Oh, my God.
You’re…
Well, you’re you.
Last time I checked.
Are you okay? You seem like you’re having a bit of a moment.
Did you know the sheriff?
Sort of.
She didn’t like me very much.
She didn’t like me either.
I’m Samantha. Sam Carpenter.
My sister and I were attacked.
Sorry to hear that.
I’m Gale…
Riley.
Weathers. I’m Gale Weathers. Excuse me.
Gale?
A text?
You tell me the killer is back in a text?
Ow, that hurts.
Good!
You were on the air.
How do you know?
A hunch.
You look good. Are you still writing?
No time.
You were always happiest when you were writing.
Well, sir, it’s okay We’re here with Gale.
I’d give you a hand, but I can’t release anybody right now.
Couldn’t resist a good story, could you?
Don’t be an idiot, Dewey. I’m here because I was worried about you.
Okay, yes. My producers wanted me to cover this, for obvious reasons,
but 90% is because of you.
Well, I feel 90% better.
Don’t be so sensitive.
Since when did you care about my feelings? Especially not in the last couple years.
All right, listen. Let’s not pretend I’m the one who ended things.
No one’s pretending, Gale. I remember what happened.
Why aren’t you in uniform?
I retired.
Since when?
Since they asked me to.
Dewey.
I don’t need your pity, Gale.
I made my choices. So did you.
It was my turn. It was a great opportunity.
You said you’d try.
And I did.
For two whole months!
Listen, if you want to make me feel worse than I already do, good luck.
The mornings aren’t so bad, because I get to see you.
Pretend I’m still back there in New York.
But then I remember…
that I couldn’t hack it. I left in the middle of the night…
like a coward.
Why wouldn’t you tell me that then?
It would have mattered.
You are a lot of things, Dewey…
but you are not a coward.
You just…
You just were meant to be in Woodsboro.
And you weren’t?
Promise me you’ll leave as soon as you can.
You know I can’t promise that.
I’m sorry about Judy.
Yeah, me too.
But she’ll make a great chapter in your next book.
And don’t even get me started on Ghostface’s signature new weapon.
That shit is lit.
And can we talk about the title? Stab? What, just like the original?
Just call it Stab 8. It’s fucking Stab 8. You’re not fooling anyone.
It’s such bullshit.
Where have you been? Are you okay?
Yeah, I’m fine.
You know, that Mindy girl wasn’t kidding Stab 8 is not like the others.
I mean, no connection to the other movies. No legacy characters at all.
This franchise goes off the rails with number five.
Richie, listen to me. He killed two more people. Wes and his mother.
He killed the sheriff? You can do that?
I mean, are you okay? Where are you?
I’ll call you right back.
No, Sam…
We should be out looking for him.
Who’s at the hospital?
Who’s watching my sister?
I just heard about the sheriff.
They needed me here!
Where are you going?
My sister’s in trouble!
Where Judy Hicks has just been brutally murdered.
What are you waiting for?
Drive!
Come on. Let’s go!
Hello?
Hello?
Fuck this.
Fuck!
Goddamn it!
Should you be making a phone call right now?
Please, please.
Stop!
You know we have to live through this to help her, right?
Just hold on.
Holy shit.
Goddamn it!
Richie?
What are you doing here?
Sam called. She said that…
you were in trouble.
Did you hit me with the phone?
Look out!
Richie!
Are you at the hospital?
Hello, Samantha.
No.
Richie can’t come to the phone right now.
He’s finding out what happens to people
who stick their noses in business that doesn’t concern them.
Please don’t hurt him.
I’ll tell you what. You can choose.
I’ll only kill one.
What? Tara!
Who do you want to hear die?
No, please. I’m begging you Please don’t hurt them.
Really? You can’t save your own sister?
All you have to do is say, “Kill Richie”.
No! No!
No! Tara! Don’t touch her.
Please, please, please, I’m begging you.
Or say, “Kill Tara,”
and I’ll make sure to hit all the organs I missed last time.
Fuck you!
I’m begging you. Please don’t hurt her.
Last chance to save one.
Choose.
Why are you doing this?
You want to know why, Sam?
Maybe it’s because you’re a selfish bitch
who can’t even make a decision to save the life of someone you love.
Maybe you’re too weak for this franchise.
Maybe you’re right.
Or maybe I’m just stalling for time, fuckhead.
I’ll get Richie.
Tara!
Come on, Richie.
It’s okay. I got you.
It’s gonna be all right.
Get the elevator!
Not today.
Richie.
Let’s get out of here.
Come on, hurry up.
The head.
What?
You have to shoot ’em in the head, or they always come back.
Dewey! Who gives a fuck?
I do.
No! Dewey!
Yes, today.
It’s an honor.
No!
No!
I’m sorry.
I didn’t know him well, but…
he helped me.
That’s what he did.
He helped people.
I should’ve stopped him.
If you had, my sister would be dead.
Samantha, your sister’s awake.
Gale.
Sidney.
I came as soon as I heard.
I’m so sorry.
You shouldn’t be here.
You shouldn’t be here either.
Mark and the kids are okay?
Yeah, they’re safe for now.
I’m here to make sure of that.
Come here.
How you feeling?
Every time I get attacked, they give me better painkillers.
So there’s that.
I’m sorry.
For what? You saved my life.
For not telling you sooner.
For being the reason Dad left.
You’re not the reason Dad left.
You didn’t choose where you came from Or who you came from.
I don’t blame you for that.
I blame you for leaving me too.
That’s never gonna happen again.
I know.
But why didn’t you come to me back then?
I could’ve helped.
Because…
I was scared.
Of what?
I was scared that I would turn out just like him.
So I ran.
To protect you.
From me.
Sam…
you could never be like him.
You’re so high right now.
I’m so high right now.
I’m not even gonna lie.
I love you.
I love you too.
So what do we do now?
What nobody ever does in these situations.
We’re gonna get the fuck out of Woodsboro.
That’s her?
Yeah.
Samantha?
It’s Sam.
I’m…
I know who you are.
I hope you’re okay.
Listen, I’m sorry…
You’re Billy’s daughter.
We’ll bring the car around.
Yeah. I’m his daughter.
I’m sorry if that’s weird for you.
No, no, it’s…
I’ve been through this. A lot.
You want to talk?
I appreciate it.
And I’m…
I’m really sorry about Dewey.
But I’m taking my sister away from all this.
I tried running too It doesn’t work, it always follows.
All due respect, that’s your life, not mine.
I’m not so sure about that.
What do you want from me, lady?
Hey! Watch your tone, new girl.
You know how they always say it goes back to the original?
Here’s the original.
I want your help.
Because you’re wrong, this is your life now.
Which means whoever this is will keep coming for you.
So?
So I want you to help us kill him.
You want me to help you and the host of a morning show commit murder?
Correct.
Yeah.
And I’m what in this scenario?
The bait? The helpless victim?
If the shoe fits…
You’re not helpless, Sam.
He killed your friend, he killed ours.
And I have kids, which means I won’t sleep until he’s in the ground.
Look, I’m sorry about what this has done to your lives.
But no matter what you or the killer or anyone says,
this isn’t my story.
All right! Let’s get the fuck out of town, huh?
Sorry. That’s my boyfriend, Richie.
Nice to meet… We met.
Sam, please get in the car so we never have to see these people again.
Sam…
No. We’re leaving.
That’s the only way I can protect Tara.
Okay, good luck.
You too.
Well, that went fucking horribly.
Don’t worry, I have a plan. She seems really tough.
Honestly, Sid, who gives a shit?
You said it yourself, he’s gonna go after her.
I put a tracker on her car.
You did what?
It seemed like something Gale Weathers would do.
Take that as a compliment.
I left a message for Mom I told her where we’re going.
You good back there?
Fuck, where is it?
Where’s what?
My inhaler. I usually keep an extra one.
Should we go back?
Whoa. Okay. I vote for not going back to the murder hospital.
You want to stop at a pharmacy?
I’d need a prescription.
But I left an extra one at Amber’s Her house is on the way.
No… no.
I’d be in and out.
Could you hold out till Modesto?
I don’t think so.
Okay, what’s the address?
123 No Fucking Way Lane.
Richie, she needs it.
And I need to keep all the blood inside my body. So do you.
Richie, please.
It’s okay.
Okay, yeah. Fuck. What’s the goddamn address?
Hey, thanks for coming.
Keep pouring, Wheeler. Thank you.
Hey.
To Wes!
Beautiful son of a bitch.
We love you, buddy!
Shots, really? This is supposed to be a memorial.
Well, this is how I mourn
and distract myself from the looming specter of Death.
Hey, we’re low on beer.
There’s more in the basement I’ll go get some.
What the fuck, Mindy? Jesus!
That was a test. And you failed.
Never go off on your own with a masked killer around.
You’re the one that said we needed more beer.
And you should have asked me to come with you.
You know what else you shouldn’t do when there’s a masked killer around?
What?
Follow someone into a dark, creepy basement alone.
I mean…
how do you know I’m not the killer?
Because I am.
I’m not, actually.
But let that be a lesson Don’t trust anyone.
Then how can I trust you when you say you’re not the killer?
Exactly.
You’re learning.
Now let’s go back upstairs.
You first.
Very good.
I think I’m ready.
I mean, I think we should.
Like now. You want to go upstairs?
Like… Like upstairs?
Uh-huh. Right now.
Don’t take this the wrong way, but I think I have to pass on that.
What?
Why?
You know, I’m not like entirely sure that you’re not the…
killer.
“Don’t take this the wrong way”?
No, no, look. I’m almost 100% certain that you are not, but…
the safest option is to be down here
with all the people…
Fuck you.
And the potential witnesses.
That is a completely valid emotional response to have.
That too.
Fucking asshole.
Good job.
Fuck you, Mindy.
If I hadn’t have written that book about your mother,
none of this would’ve happened.
Gale.
I started all of this.
No, you didn’t.
Billy Loomis started this, and we’re gonna end it.
After tonight, no more books, no more movies, no more fucking Ghostface.
Don’t you know the rules?
What rules?
There are specific rules to successfully survive a horror movie.
For instance, Number One: You can never have sex.
Don’t do it. Don’t go outside after her.
She’s not texting me back.
Because she’s probably dead.
Jesus, Mindy. That’s my girlfriend, and I love her.
Was your girlfriend.
You’re just gonna sit and watch a movie about our uncle getting stabbed?
It calms me down, okay?
I’m also gonna smoke some weed and possibly hook up with Frances.
Have fun.
Oh, my God, at least take some sort of weapon.
Here you go.
All right.
What?
Liv?
Liv?
All right. Okay, yeah, no.
Shit!
Fuck!
Please, please, please.
Whoa! Stop! Wait!
Perfect. She’s having a party.
Who has a party in the middle of a killing spree? I’m aborting the plan.
No, we’re already here. I’ll go in quickly and get it. I’ll be back in five.
I’m coming too.
If you think I’m waiting out here just to get murdered,
you’re out of your mind.
Tara!
What are you doing out of the hospital? Should you even be up and around?
I need my spare inhaler.
Why? Where are you going?
It’s fine, don’t tell me I get it. Just be safe, okay?
I think it’s in my room.
All right, everyone! Thanks for coming, but the party’s over!
Time to go!
No!
But it’s so early!
Let’s go.
Hey, hey, hey! Hello! Can we cut the music, please?
Hi… Gen Z. How are you?
Both Sam and Tara here have been attacked by the killer twice.
Now they’re here, which makes this place a huge murder target, so…
if I were you, I would probably leave.
Okay, I tried to be nice. Get the fuck out!
Please get the fuck out.
Sincerely, get the fuck out.
Buzzkill!
Thank you. Thank you all. I’m saving your life. I promise.
Thanks, teens.
Thank you so much.
Great, thank you for leaving the cup Thank you.
Saving your life.
I’m saving your life.
Saving your life, thank you.
And Number Three:
Never, ever, ever, under any circumstances,
say, “I’ll be right back”.
‘Cause you won’t be back.
Somebody’s goofy-ass dad’s kicking us out.
Goddamn it.
Thank you.
Thanks, guys, have a good night.
You have my number. Bye.
Bye.
Hi.
Is there any beer left? There’s none in the kitchen.
Yes, Richie, there’s beer in the basement.
Right behind you. Basement.
Yeah.
Do you want to come with me?
No. But you were right to ask.
Yeah.
Okay, I’ll be right back.
Yeah. Yeah.
Well, he’s dead.
The goddamn fucking Uber canceled on me!
Great. Now I can’t have sex and I can’t get a ride home.
Could this night get any shittier?
Liv, where’s my brother?
What? I don’t know, Mindy. Probably off accusing everyone of being the killer!
He actually went looking for you.
I didn’t see him. Okay?
Why are you looking at me like that?
Just revising my suspect list.
Fuck this!
Are you afraid of me, Mindy?
You think I did something to your brother? Huh?
You think I’m gonna… cut you up?
A little bit now… yeah.
I thought you said I was too boring to be the killer.
Maybe that’s the twist.
What do you think, huh? You’re the expert.
You know what eventually happens to the expert?
What?
Enjoy your stupid movie.
Fucking psycho.
They stopped.
Gas station?
No.
Oh, shit.
What?
Oh, shit. How far are we?
Too far.
Damn it.
Tara, we’re leaving!
Hello.
You need to get out of that house right now.
How do you know where I am?
You’re in Stu Macher’s house, where your dad and Stu killed everyone.
Someone planned to get you there You need to get the fuck out, Sam!
No, Jamie. Watch out.
Watch out, Jamie.
You know he’s around.
What?
There he is.
Come on, man, turn around! Turn around! Dude!
I told you. I told you, he’s around the corner. Jamie.
Look behind you.
No, Randy, look behind you.
Come on, man, turn around!
Dude, what are you doing? You can do it!
These are your rules! Own that shit.
Behind you! Turn around.
Look behind…
Oh, shit!
That’s a lot of blood, Sam.
No, Mindy, stay with me.
What did you do to her?
Nothing.
No, I didn’t do anything.
The killer, he…
Is she okay?
What the fuck?
Richie, where the fuck were you?
I went into the basement to get beer.
You went to the basement alone?
I asked her to come with me! She said no!
Fuck!
Stay the fuck back.
Jesus Christ!
I was with Tara, but the rest of you were wandering around.
One of you is the fucking killer!
Fuck you, Amber. Fuck you!
Why is there blood on your hands?
What?
I found Chad. I found Chad and he’s…
Chad?
You’re fucking lying.
No.
You’re the killer.
No, I’m not.
Liv, stop.
Fuck you!
Liv, just stop!
Fuck you, Amber. I’m not the fucking killer!
I know.
Welcome to Act Three.
Run!
Holy shit!
Sam, come on!
Run! Go, go, go! Go!
Oh, my God… Tara!
Wait, no, Sam.
She has a gun.
There are always two killers.
Sam, please put the knife down.
Look, I think…
I think the other killer might be Tara.
What?
She’s the one that brought us here and you two have been estranged for years.
I mean…
how well do you really know her?
Better than I know you.
Sam, wait. Sam!
Sounds about right.
You ready?
For this? Never.
Here we go.
Help me, help me! He stabbed me!
What do you think?
Trap.
Fuck it.
Ow!
Gale! Gale!
Wait. Let me see.
You got to go to the hospital.
No.
You said we were gonna finish this. Go finish it, Sidney.
Gale.
For Dewey.
Anyone hiding, killer or not, you have five seconds to show yourself!
Tara.
Oh, my God.
Sam.
Sam, please.
Hello, Sidney!
Hello there. Where’d you go?
This isn’t Amber. I’m the other one.
There’s two of you. Again.
I’ve seen this movie before.
Not this movie, Sidney.
You really need some new material.
I got you here, didn’t I?
You might actually be the most derivative one of all.
I mean, Christ, the same house?
Maybe so. But you forgot the first rule of surviving a Stab movie.
Never answer the…
I’m bored.
Wait!
Put your hands up! Show me your hands! What are you doing in there?
Hiding from murderers.
I told you to come out!
I’m not gonna come out! You’re shooting everything!
Holy shit, it’s Ghostface!
Richie! Gun. Get the gun.
Kind of hard since you shot me in the leg.
Yes! Yes!
Shoot him!
Thank God you’re okay.
‘Cause I really,
really wanted to be the one to kill you.
Sit the fuck down, Prescott!
I can’t believe this worked.
I know. It’s a bummer it’s me.
But it really was the best choice for the movie.
This isn’t a fucking movie!
No. But it will be.
That’s the point, right, Amber?
Right, hon!
Third Act bloodbath, check. Killers revealed, check.
Time for the big finale!
Richie…
Okay. Okay.
Let’s get ’em into the kitchen.
Let’s go, bitch!
Someone has to save the franchise.
You see, no one has made a great Stab movie since the first one.
Not really.
Hey, baby, you want to go get the very ex-Mrs. Riley?
Yeah, I do.
Hey, hey!
Whoa… whoa.
Sidney Prescott.
You know…
I’m a really big fan.
Go fuck yourself.
You see the last Stab movie?
Not really a fan of scary movies.
That checks out. Anyway, it sucked balls.
Because nobody takes the true fans seriously. Not really.
They just laugh at us, and why?
Because we love something?
We’re just a fucking joke to them?
How can fandom be toxic?
It’s about love!
They don’t fucking understand that these movies are important to people.
Richie…
But we’re gonna help them!
Hollywood’s totally fucking out of ideas,
so we decided we’d give them some new source material to follow.
Bring it back to basics.
Because that’s how you make a great Stab movie, Sam.
“Based on actual events”.
Gale.
Sit the fuck down!
Back up.
You did all this just to make me the hero of your fucked-up movie?
Sweetie, you’re not the hero.
You’re the villain.
The daughter of Billy Loomis who sees fucked-up visions of her dead dad.
Sidney Prescott killed your father.
You…
did all this just to get her back to Woodsboro.
You know what the biggest problem with the Stab movies is?
There’s no Michael Myers or Jason Voorhees.
No bad guy to keep coming back.
But the illegitimate daughter of the original mastermind?
Now that’s a fucking villain.
How did you know?
About your father?
It’s a small town and your mom’s a drunk!
I met Richie on the Stab subreddit.
I’ve been obsessed ever since my parents bought this house.
We realized pretty quickly we had similar ideas.
Wasn’t that hard for me to find you in Modesto.
It wasn’t that hard for me to fuck you, either.
But I guess being a sexually available woman
is supposed to be empowering these days.
Fuck you!
Well, now you’re just quoting the original.
But it wouldn’t work with just you, Sam.
See, we had to bring the legacy characters back to make it matter.
Can’t have a bona fide Halloween without Jamie Lee!
Nope!
Dewey had to die to make it real.
To show that this wasn’t just some bullshit,
cash-in, run-of-the-mill sequel.
Because our movie has fucking stakes!
‘Cause anyone can die in a requel.
No!
Goddamn it. Whoa, whoa!
No, hey! Sit the fuck down.
I’m so sorry, Sid.
We can’t let you live, either I mean, surviving this many times…
that would just be ridiculous.
This time the fans are gonna be the ones who win.
That about cover it?
Nailed it, baby.
Get Tara out of the closet We got to start staging the bodies!
Stay with me, Sid. Stay with me.
You really should’ve listened to Dewey.
He nailed it in one! Dude, look at the love interest!
Are you fucking stupid?
I even had you convinced it could be your sister.
She’s not here.
What the fuck do you mean, she’s not here?
She’s not here!
I untied her.
Guess you’re not as persuasive as you thought.
That’s for you.
Yeah, like your gimpy little sister’s gonna make a difference.
She’s our fucking pincushion at this point.
Amber! Fan out. She couldn’t have gotten far.
I can’t find her!
Amber?
Sam! Where you going? Your big scene’s coming up!
Fucking kill you!
The fucking hand sanitizer?
No, no, no, it’s not my fault! It’s not my fault!
Let me guess, the movies made you do it?
No, it was the message boards! I was radicalized.
By movie fans?
Yes, they’re so mad!
Please, it’s not my fault I’m just a dumb kid.
I wanted to be a part of something.
“A part of something”? You killed my best friend!
Yeah, and he died like a pussy.
That’s the thing about slashers, Sam.
So many blood trails.
This one yours?
Only one way to find out!
I was the last thing Dewey saw before he died too.
I can’t believe I get to do you both.
No last-minute saves this time Your story’s over!
Time to pass the torch.
It’s all yours, bitch!
You want to do the honors?
This one’s yours.
No, stop, stop, stop! I’m sorry about Dewey!
Fuck you!
Enjoy that torch.
Stop…
fucking up…
my ending!
Sam?
Sam!
Okay.
What are you gonna do now, huh?
Make a scary phone call to me?
Pop out of that closet in a Ghostface mask?
No.
Because you’re the villain!
And the villain dies at the end.
Those are the rules.
I’m introducing a new rule.
And what would that be? Huh?
Well?
Never fuck with the daughter of a serial killer.
What about… my ending?
Here it comes.
Careful, they always come back.
Okay, then.
I still prefer The Babadook.
Are you okay?
Are you good?
I’m so sorry.
Excuse me.
Excuse me, sir.
Hey.
Hey.
She’s gonna be okay.
Can you take us to a different hospital this time?
Of course.
You ready to go?
I’ll be right back, yeah?
Your vitals look good.
You sit tight for a draft, okay?
Sidney. Gale.
Thank you both.
For everything.
Are you gonna be all right?
I’ll survive I always do.
You were right…
about not running.
Sorry about that.
How are you doing?
Ask me in a few days.
But at least I know what I’m gonna write about.
What’s that?
Not this.
Those fuckers can die in anonymity.
But maybe something about a good man who used to be the sheriff here once.
I’d like to read that story.
Can I ask you a weird question?
Yeah.
Am I gonna be okay?
Eventually.
Hey.
Wait. Sam, Sam!
Thank you.
Well, you’re not going anywhere without me.
Don’t worry.
I’m gonna hold your hand all the way there.
I can take care of her and her sister.
She’s all ready for transportation.
25 years ago, almost to the day, in this very house a tragic story ended.
Tonight, a new chapter came to a close.
Police do not have a lot of information right now, as they are still collecting evidence.
As you can see, this is a very active crime scene.
An unknown number of fatalities, several injuries, some people being taken off by ambulance right now as we speak.
This is a developing story…
Category:Transcripts
Category:Paramount Pictures Transcripts