Persona BLEACHED 4: Chapter 30

Chapter 30: The Giving Mood
November 27, 2031
"So...since you've been here, you've been stabbed, broken your arm, and gotten your face decked in." Ibuki sat on the side of Max's bed, with him lying in it.
"And somehow I'm still alert enough to make bad jokes." he replied.
It was late morning in New York City, inside the P.D.F. apartments. The Artisans were all packed into Max's living quarters, with the intention of touring around the city before returning home later in the day.
Ibuki was holding onto the daruma doll. "I was going crazy looking around for this. Wasn't my first thought that you'd take him with you."
"He's the only thing I brought. Just as a reminder. About why I'm here."
"And what would that be?"
"You should know already."
"Oh, let me guess. Still trying to prove that you're not the same guy we beat up a couple years back. You don't need to prove it to me, Sparkplug. I know it. That Cindy girl told me how you jumped in front of her and saved her. That isn't something Captain Thunder would've done. That's something the Maxie I love would do."
"That...really means a lot."
"So if you think so, then come home with us. The people here seem to be keen on ya, I'm sure they'll put in a good word. You don't have to keep punishing yourself."
"They already tried. And I told them no."
"You...told them no?"
"It was after I took the hit for Cindy. They said they'd send me back for my own safety. I told them I wouldn't be going back for good until the job was done. You saw him. On the island. The guy's like every demon I've ever met rolled up into one shit-talking stew. I couldn't go back knowing that he's still running around causing pain and misery." He paused. "Are you disappointed?"
"Nah. Much as I want ya back, that heroic streak is what makes ya so charming. I can wait. But that freak took a hell of a lot of hits and still stood up and howled. You sure you can take him out?"
"No one's invincible. Even when I thought I was, you all found a way to win. Whichever way you look at it, we hurt him. And I'm sure there's a way to make it easier to do it. There always is."
"I'm sure your new part-robot bestie can figure it out. All I'm saying is, if you don't come back to me safe and sound, I'm coming back here. And I'm not gonna be happy."
"I'll make sure to warn them on that."
"Well since I'm here..." Ibuki took out her phone. "There's something I wanted to run past ya." She pulled up a picture. "Tell me what you think."
Max scrolled through the photos, each of them detailing different rooms in an apartment. "It's...very pink."
"I think it's adorable. It's in a really nice part of town, and it's just a hop from the salon. It'd be perfect for the two of us."
"You're serious about the apartment? Even though you'd be away from Kaede?"
"She might've started warming up to ya, but we've gotta have our own space sooner or later. I've lived with her my whole life, but mama's gotta spread her wings and fly a bit, y'know? So..." Ibuki held the phone over her face, an expectant look in her eyes. "Feel like diving into the pink?"
"Too much pink energy is dangerous."
"Too much...wha?"
Max shook his head. "Dumb reference, never mind. Honestly, the place looks great. And if I was afraid of pink, I wouldn't have worn a pink suit to dance recitals when I was a kid."
"Hold up, I thought it was just Barbie that did that?"
"She needed a partner, and I was the only one she'd dance with."
"Do pictures exist? Please tell me Ms. Annie has them stowed away somewhere."
"Oh, she has pictures from every occasion. She'll be more than happy to show you." Barbara walked in.
"Please don't turn her into an embarrassing baby pics kind of mom." Max pleaded.
"Hey, if she gets to do it to me, then you're fair game too, little bro. I'm already preparing for it tonight."
"Oh, you're gonna visit her later?" Max put a hand on his forehead as he made a realization. "Oh, God. It's Thanksgiving today, isn't it? I'd totally forgotten."
"Oh, you guys have that kinda thing, too? Ours was a few days ago, actually." Ibuki asked.
"Yours is more about appreciating the labor force. Thanksgiving back home is more about celebrating harvest. It comes with a big family meal all the same." Max explained.
"Thing is, Thanksgiving is a bit of a touchy subject for a lot of Native Americans. It can be a reminder of all the things that were taken from us over the years. Some see it as a time to mourn. But these last couple of years, Mama's put her own spin on it. She calls it, and I quote, 'Eff My Ex Day'." Barbara added.
"Sounds like my kind of holiday."
"Basically, she cooks up a turkey like normal, then after dinner she destroys something that reminds her of the old man. Then we cleanse the whole house of negativity. It's cathartic, if nothing else."
"Okay, that sounds incredible. I've gotta see it now. Mind if I stop in before heading home?" Ibuki asked.
"Mama'd love it if you came over. It was just gonna be me and Keeb with her, since Uncle Davie's on-call, but he's gonna try to stop by if he can. And Maxie..."
"Barb--" Max began.
"Please? I know you've got your reasons, but it'd make Mama feel so much better if she saw you. Just to know you're okay. It can just be tonight, and then you'll come back here after. It'd mean so much to her. And to me."
Max thought about it. "Damn. You know I can't say no to a turkey if Mama's the one cooking it. I'll see if Cindy can pull some strings for me."
"You've totally built up enough credit to have one night with the fam. It's gonna be a hoot." Ibuki replied.
"Oh, she's gonna be over the moon when she sees you! Maybe she'll let you smash one of the old man's trophies he cheated his way to getting." Barbara said.
"That'd be worth the trip by itself." Max replied.
"Oh, before I forget...I don't think you gave our Fireball a definitive answer on that apartment."
Ibuki held the picture back up. "Dive into the pink, Maxie."
"Y'all are really boxing me into a corner here. I was gonna say yes, anyway. I'm more than happy to do it." Max replied.
Ibuki kissed his cheek. "I love you. This is gonna be amazing! I'll call the realtor as soon as I get back. Permission to touch your things and move them in? I'll try to keep them...semi-organized."
"Permission granted. I'll let you pick the rooms."
"Woooo! Excitement! You'd better be back soon, Sparkplug! It's not a solo nest I'm putting money into!"
"Don't throw any wild parties before then."
"Oh, me and Saku are gonna get *crazy*. You'd better believe it."
"I don't think she has a crazy bone in her body." Max got up. "Anyway, I think we should head out."
"Got a place in mind you want us to see?" Barbara asked.
"Not so much a place. It's probably closed for the holiday. But there's someone in Queens I'd like you all to meet."
---
"Now, should we go for black-and-red, or black-and-orange?" Emily was in her room, with two dresses floating in the air in front of her.
"Caw caw." Muno chirped.
"I know the orange one fits more with the holiday, but it feels a little too poofy for a smaller get-together. Still, it would be a nice change of pace compared to what I've been wearing."
"Craaaaw."
"Oh, stop it, you. I'm not the fashionista Cindy is. I just know what my tastes are."
"Cacaw."
"Oh, alright. You've convinced me. Black-and-orange it is. Now I just need to fix up my--"
The doorbell rang. "Hm? Visitors?"
"Caaaaaw?"
"I wasn't expecting anyone, no. You haven't been batting eyes at that roving flock from the windowsill again, have you?"
"Caaaaw."
"Because girls tend to not like longing gazes from afar. Doesn't matter what the species is. I'll see who it is."
Emily opened the door. "Ah, hello there, Mr. Jadefang. Did you just get back from the island?"
"Hey. Yeah, a couple hours ago. It was a bit more chaotic than I was expecting." Max replied.
"So I see. Every time I see you, you look like you've gone through an even worse fight than the last. Surely you should be resting. Why the visit?"
"Well, I've got some company for the next few hours, and I wanted to introduce you."
"To me? What sort of...ah."
She opened the door wider to see the crowd behind Max. The group all had surprised looks at the sight of Emily. None moreso than Kat.
"...woah." she uttered.
"Ah...are these people who I think they are?" Emily asked.
"That they are. Did I catch you at a bad time?" Max asked.
"Oh, not at all. I was in the middle of picking my wardrobe for tonight. Please, come in."
"Yo, Maxie. You said she's a witch, right? We're not gonna be like, boiled in a pot or turned into pigs, are we?" Sahir asked.
"Did you bring us here to be turned into your undead servants as payback for what happened last year?" Kenneth questioned.
"Please, I'm not that bitter." Max replied.
"Maybe she's more of a cute witch, like the show me and Layla like." Natalia suggested.
"I still don't know how to reconcile any of this. The technology here being as impressive as it is, yet here we are at the home of a master of the arcane. Dad would be completely dizzied by the sight of this..." Tabby said.
"What exactly *is* a crazy powerful witch doing in a New York apartment, anyway?" Ibuki asked.
"Whatever questions you have, she's got the answers to. She knows a lot more than you'd think. Come on." Max urged.
The group either sat down or started looking around. "Yep, yep...we're definitely leaving in a vacuum packed carton." Sahir uttered.
"Sahir-kun, please. It'll be a self-fulfilling prophecy if you offend our host." Sakuya chastised.
"You needn't worry. I know this must be jarring when you've come from a place so distant in terms of what's real and what isn't. I apologize for not having any tea prepared, I wasn't expecting so many guests today." Emily said. "I'm sure Max mentioned a little bit about me already, but my name is Emily O'Donnell. Your friend's counterpart here is my father."
"So, the other Sparky has kids...and one of them has my hair. Wild." Kat uttered.
"So that must make you the fabled Kit So-yin. But you prefer Kat, don't you?"
"Uh...yeah. Sheesh, Sparky wasn't kidding. You do know everything."
"It's nothing that dramatic. I garnered plenty of information from your Max."
"Oh, you did, huh?"
"Don't look at me like that, it wasn't anything bad." Max denied.
"It'd better not be. Or you'd be getting a matching scar on your rump."
"You've given me enough scars, thanks."
"Excuse me, Ms. Emily? What's your little friend's name?" Tabby asked.
"Oh, of course. This is Muno, my familiar. He brings me information from everywhere. Say hello, Muno." Emily responded.
The crow's attention was elsewhere.
"Ah...Muno? Are you listening?"
He was staring squarely at an unawares Sakuya. His beak slowly opened as he imagined red and pink love hearts bubbling up around her.
"Caaaaaw..."
"Earth to Muno, are you there?" Emily asked.
The bird, ignoring her, fluttered off of his perch and over to where Sakuya was standing. "Caaaaaw~."
"Um...hello. Can I help you?" Sakuya asked.
"Caaaaw~!"
"Hey, buddy, quit ruffling your feathers! She's already taken!" Sahir griped.
Muno proceeded to open his beak unnaturally wide, revealing sharpened fangs, his eyes flaring red as he let out a ghastly roar at Sahir. The ex-soccer star had all the color drain from him.
"Muno, stop being ridiculous! You're embarrassing yourself, and me for that matter!" Emily scolded.
"Craaaaaw." If birds could thumb their nose, that was exactly what the crow would be doing.
Emily looked dejected. "All that love and care, and this is the thanks I get?"
"Oh, the charms of pet care." Kat quipped.
"Well fine, have it your way. Guess we'll be going back to the generic birdseed you *love* so much."
That got Muno's attention. "Skraw?!" He immediately flew back over and perched on Emily's shoulder.
"That's what I thought. I am...*so* sorry about that."
"It's fine. Although I'm not entirely sure how flattering it is for a bird to find me attractive..." Sakuya replied.
"Hey, are you okay?" Kibō asked Sahir.
"Oh yeah, totally. Never thought my death could've come from a pigeon in its goth phase, is all." he shuddered.
"Maybe my companion here can make up for it with a display of what he can do. Rest assured, I won't look at anything too intrusive. Ready, Muno?" Emily asked.
"Caaaaw."
"Wonderful. Let's begin."
The bird's eyes began to glow as he perused the group, taking care not to dive too deeply into their personal matters.
"Let's see...so you all do possess the same power as your Max. These 'Personas', as you call them. Very interesting. So starting with you, Ms. Kit. Age 18. Birthday, July 13. Your Persona is Selene, the Greek Goddess of the Moon. Oh, so you're studying to become a teacher?"
"Woah, that's crazy. How much has Sparky told you, exactly?" Kat asked.
"It's all Muno's doing. He can read people as if they were novels. Don't worry, I told him not to get too personal. Teaching is an honorable profession. He shows me that you have a soft spot for children."
"Guess you can say that. I like being a big sister to kids that need it. My mom's a teacher, and so's the person that's helped me out the most. I wanna do right by 'em."
"Very respectable, Ms. Kit. I enjoy imparting my wisdom, too. There's just something so special about passing your knowledge on. It's a way of keeping part of yourself going on."
"Heh, that's definitely one way of looking at it."
"So, moving on. Hm...Barbara Jadefang. Age 19, birthday October 9. Your Persona is the Lady of the Lake, Nimue. You're a practicing actress and theater diva. Ah, so you're Max's sister. I could tell from the eyes and your affinity for the color blue."
"Yep, that's all me~. I wanted to thank you for looking after Maxie for me. It's way more comforting knowing that he's doing okay here." Barbara replied.
"You know you don't have to get that sappy when I'm around, don't you?" Max asked.
Barbara put her arm around his. "Nope~."
Emily chuckled. "It's good to see such a healthy sibling relationship. Most of us can only dream of that. Now let's keep this going. Ibuki Hinotama. Age 21, birthday February 23. Your Persona is Artemis, Greek Goddess of the Hunt. A former wrestler currently working as a hairdresser. And if I'm not mistaken, you're the one Max can't stop talking about." Emily continued.
"Awww, I really am his obsession, ain't I?" Ibuki elbowed Max.
"You're just dead-set on getting me flustered, aren't you?" Max sighed.
"I speak only in facts, Mr. Jadefang. Love isn't something to be embarrassed by. The one you're happiest with feels the same way about you. That's something to be cherished." Emily assured.
Ibuki grabbed Max's hand and enthusiastically swung it around. "I wuvs him~." she chimed.
"Next, we have you. Kibō Ishimaru. Age 19, birthday August 29. Your Persona is the legendary King Arthur himself, leader of the Knights of the Round Table. You're studying towards a law degree, and you're also something of a wrestler yourself, it seems."
"That's probably exaggerating it. My mom taught me how to fight. She's way better at it than I could ever hope for. My parents want me to study so I'd never have to use my fists to earn money. I just want them to be comfortable with every part of their lives." Kibō replied.
"As honorable and straightforward as I'd expect of a knight. Ms. Jadefang is quite the lucky lady."
"Please. I'm the lucky one."
"Awwww~." Barbara blushed.
"Moving along. Kenneth Southgate. Age 18, birthday June 3. Your Persona is Wayland, the blacksmith of Norse legend. You are a...sculptor, I see. Not what I was expecting." Emily dictated.
"Assuming that I would be an assassin like my counterpart in this world? Mercifully, no. I'm well aware of that man's unsavory occupation, along with his brutish tendencies regarding his table manners." Kenneth responded.
"Certainly one way to describe Ken. I doubt he's had anything resembling an artistic thought in his life. He's more at home with a knife than a hammer and chisel. Not to downplay your own craft. I much prefer the arts to wanton violence, a thousand times over."
"As I would hope for in a bookseller."
"Now for my terrified friend here..."
"Please don't hex me, I didn't mean to get your bird angry..." Sahir pleaded.
"He's the one who should be apologizing."
"Craaaaw."
"Don't give me that attitude, you know what you did. Now behave like a proper gentlebird. Now let's see. Sahir Musa, age 19, birthday September 6. Your Persona is Agni, the Hindu deity of fire. You're an ex-soccer player studying to become a surgeon. Quite the monumental task you've set for yourself."
"Yeah, no, tell me about it. It's only Year One and all the reading's killing me. Maybe kicking a ball into a net was the easier path." Sahir said.
"Easier or not, you shouldn't dissuade yourself so early. It comes with the profession. You're going to have people's lives in your hands. It's best for you to be as prepared and knowledgeable as possible before you ever pick up a scalpel. One mistake could be catastrophic."
"Yeah, no pressure. Just what the doctor ordered."
"If it was a simple task, everyone would be doing it. Stay the course. You'll be alright. Now for..."
"Craaaaw~."
"Restraint, you."
"Oh, dear." Sakuya uttered.
"Sakuya Hanakotoba. Age 18, birthday July 10. Your Persona is the legendary Chinese warrior, Hua Mulan. A burgeoning marine biologist, I see. With a...notable affinity for seals."
"Seals?! Where?!" Sakuya regained her composure. "Beg your pardon. I'm feeling a little boopy from the travel--I mean loopy."
"Having a grand old time today, aren't you, Maggie?" Kat teased.
"I'll spare you any further attention from my feathered companion. But just one word of advice, Ms. Hanakotoba." Emily spoke.
"Yes?" Sakuya asked.
"Your life is valid. Never feel sorry about who you are, so long as you're happy with yourself. Remember that always."
"Ah...thank you. That does mean a lot, Witch-san."
"You're welcome. Now to your bewildered companion. Tabitha Fairweather, age 18, birthday July 29. Your Persona is Eos, Greek Goddess of the dawn and sister to Selene. Aspiring to teach science, I see. What you're seeing must be difficult for you to comprehend."
"I won't deny that. Science is about what you can see with your own eyes. And what I'm seeing should be impossible based on everything I've ever been taught. I'm still stuck on interdimensional travel being real, much less everything else I've been told about this world." Tabby replied.
"Don't be too discouraged. Magic is just science that hasn't been explained through standard methods. And it doesn't have any bearing on your world. But I'm sensing a bit of a crisis of confidence coming from you aside from that."
"Yeah, you could say that...I'm still not very good at this, if I'm being honest. It feels like I get in the way more often than not."
"You don't gotta be so hard on yourself, Tabs. It's not a crime to be new at something. Just stick with us and you'll be okay." Kat put an arm around her shoulders.
"I was about to say much the same thing. Even I wasn't immediately good at magic. Studying yourself takes time and effort. You'll be just fine, I'm sure." Emily reassured.
"I hope so. As long as I'm not bearing down the jaws of a horde of werewolves again..." Tabby replied.
"Now for you with the hood...Natalia Van Damme. Age 18, birthday January 21. Your Persona is Hulda, a fairytale seamstress. You yourself are a clothing maker of great talent, I can see."
"Aww, you don't have to hit me with the compliments. I just know my way around a needle and thread." Natalia insisted.
"So you're the 'Nat' Max mentioned. I happen to know a Nat, myself."
"Oh, so there is another me here. What's she like?"
"She can be a real tease. She also happens to be my mentor in magic. She was best friends with my mother, and helped to raise me after she passed away. I owe her a great deal."
"She's also a cat person like you, Natty." Max added.
"Hehe, guess some things don't change." Natalia replied.
"She shares your positive outlook, as well. Although I can see it wasn't always that way for you. You've had to overcome a great deal." Emily said.
"Yeah. I was my own worst enemy for a long time. But I've had a lot of help to get out of that rut. Great parents, great friends, and a lot of hugs. The formula for a happy life."
"Brilliant words if I've ever heard them. Lastly, we have...hm?"
"Is something wrong?" Carrie asked.
"....." Max said nothing.
"Hey, why did you go quiet all of a sudden? Something got your tongue?" Emily asked.
"....." Muno was uncharacteristically silent.
"....!"
"What is it that you're seeing?" Carrie questioned.
"You're...Carrie Blackthorne. Age 18, birthday February 12. Your Persona is Irene, the one person who outsmarted the great detective. You're an environmentalist and computer expert. Quite the intelligent young woman..." Emily trailed off.
"Care...you know that there was another you in this world, right?" Max asked.
"Yes, I'd heard that she had...ah. So the Carrie Blackthorne of this world...she was..." Carrie realized.
"...beg your pardon. I should be brewing that tea. Please excuse me." Emily went to the kitchen.
"Wow, that got awkward in a hurry. Does she know the Care from here?" Ibuki asked.
"The Carrie of this world was her mother. She...died, when Emily was little." Max answered.
"Oh, damn. No wonder she got all worked up." Sahir said.
"I'm gonna go talk to her. Sorry for the awkward turn, Care."
"No, it's fine. I think I should speak with her, too." Carrie got up and followed Max to the kitchen.
The room got quiet. Sahir noticed Muno staring at Sakuya again. "Don't even try it, birdbrain."
"Caaaaw." 
Sakuya sighed. "Why can't seals look at me like that?"
In the kitchen, Emily, clearly unnerved, began prepping tea. "....."
"Hey, Em? You okay?" Max entered.
She sighed. "I don't know yet."
"Look, I'm sorry about that. It totally slipped my mind. I never meant to--"
"Please, don't apologize. It wasn't..."
"Excuse me, is everything alright?" Carrie asked.
"I am so terribly sorry about how I reacted. It's unbecoming of me to do something like that."
"You don't have to apologize. I know why you had that reaction. The 'me' that lived in this world was your mother. It must have brought back some uncomfortable emotions."
"I know that you aren't her. You sound different, you have a completely different skillset, you're ten years my junior. And yet...you have her name. Her best friend was Natalie, yours is Natalia. And you're bonded with a girl who has the same taste in hair coloring as me. It's impossible to ignore the similarities. The emotions got the better of me and I...reacted how I did."
"You miss her terribly, don't you?"
"Yes. Fervently. Horribly. I was still a toddler when she died. Growing up without her made me bitter to everyone who was still around. I felt like they'd forgotten about her, but I couldn't. It wasn't just that she'd died, but that it was such a horrible end for her. It's agonizing to think about."
"It is. It's a feeling I know all too well."
"You do?"
"I lost my parents when I was little, too. Theirs was a violent end, much like your mother's. It's haunted me every day I've opened my eyes since then. And not just them. Our chauffeur sacrificed himself to keep me alive that day. I was the only one to make it out with my life. That's something I have to live with. My parents wanted to ensure I grew up in a beautiful world. That dream cost them their lives. And yet here I am still."
"I'm so sorry. I know how unbearable that pain must feel."
"On some days, it is unbearable. But then I remember that I have people who are still here that I need to be there for. The ones that I lost wouldn't want me to toil in misery and lose everything I still have. I'm sure that your mother would say the same. What was she like, if you don't mind me asking?"
"From what little I can remember, she was a very light-hearted person. Always teasing and joking with everybody. My father especially. People tell me he was so timid and tightly wound most of the time, except when she was around. She had such a wonderful effect on everyone around her. One of the few memories I still have is her reading me old fables before I went to bed. I get my love of books from her. I have her personal collection stored away somewhere safe. All except for that collection of fables. I still keep that close. Sometimes when I'm having trouble sleeping, I give it a read like the old days...sorry, I must be talking your ear off."
"No, it's lovely that you still have that connection to her. If you don't mind me asking, would you be willing to share some of those fables with me?"
"Really? You want me to...read them to you?"
"I'm from a largely scientific background. I'd love to learn as much as I can about your magic while I'm here. And maybe it can help you to heal, reading it the way your mother did for you. If that's alright."
"I...I would like that very much. That's incredibly kind of you. I can do it as soon as I'm done with the tea."
"Care is the most generous person you could ever meet. I know she's being 100% genuine with this." Max said.
"It's the least that I can do." Carrie replied.
"Say, Em. I think there's someone else she should talk to, don't you?"
"Yes...yes, you're right. When we're finished here, of course. Would you like to help me prepare the tea?" Emily asked.
"That would be lovely. Let me see your silverware..." Carrie replied.
The moment was interrupted by a sudden flash of light coming from the living room. "What on Earth was that?" Carrie questioned.
"Uh-oh. My Shenanigan Sense is tingling." Max said.
"Oh, no. That was a protection spell I put on all of my texts. I'd left one on the table before you all came over. Someone must've opened it." Emily shook her head.
"Aw, geez. What kind of spell are we talking?" Max asked.
"It's a book of traditional recipes from my coven. The information is relatively harmless, so it's a minor spell. But the effects can be..."
The three went to the living room, where the others appeared unharmed. "Is everyone alright?" Max asked.
"You really wanna be asking that question?" Sahir spoke with a high-pitched voice, almost as if he'd taken in a quantity of helium.
"Oh. I didn't realize I was in the presence of a celebrity. Where are the rest of the chipmunks?"
"Yuck it up, yuck it up!"
"Kial niaj renkontiĝoj devas ĉiam pleniĝi de absurdaĵoj?" Sakuya spoke.
"What...the hell language is that?" Max asked.
"I'm genuinely afraid to ask." Carrie replied.
"Ridiculous, this is. Logic in this, there is none." Kenneth said.
Ibuki opened her mouth to speak, but no words came. Rather, it was a noise reminiscent of the dial-up sound made when logging into old internet browsers. This sound left her simultaneously annoyed and confused.
"...how is this supposed to deter people from reading your ancient cookbook?" Max asked.
"Oh this is just hee-larious, ho! Like a ba-haw-rell of laughs, ho!" Kat uttered.
"I am Groot." Kibō added.
"Ho, siht si eht tsrow! Os gniyonna!" Barbara complained.
"Hello-lo? Friends acting very much like angrypons, no? Problem much bigger than Gonzalez, sounding like." Tabby said.
"Oh, this is quite unfortunate. Have you fallen victim to this too, Natalia?" Carrie asked.
Natalia looked sheepish. The voice that came from her mouth was deep, masculine and baritone. "I don't wanna talk about it..."
"Muno, why didn't you stop them from opening the book?" Emily asked.
"Craaaaw."
"That feathered dirtbag landed right next to it! He knew what he was doing!" Sahir squeaked.
Ibuki let out angry dial-up noises.
"Bonvolu ripari ĉi tion, Sorĉistino-san. Ĉi tio estas embarasa." Sakuya said.
"Obnoxious, this is. Undo this, you must." Kenneth demanded.
"Well, you heard Yoda. There a way to fix this?" Max asked.
"The effects usually expire after two hours. Though, I've seen them last as many as fifteen." Emily replied.
"Neetfif?!" Barbara questioned.
"I am Groot?!" Kibō added.
"Ho-no..." Kat uttered.
"But I do know a way to speed up the process. A special herb to go with the tea. That should undo the spell." Emily continued.
"Meh-meh! Friend Em-Em should have said from start!" Tabby said.
"I should have enough of it left to fix everyone. Carrie, would you mind?"
"It would be my pleasure. Sit tight, everybody." Carrie went with Emily.
Max smirked.
"What's the chee-hee-ry look for, ho?" Kat asked.
"Oh, nothing. It's just fun to watch everyone *else* be the butt of the joke for once." he replied.
"Eble ĉi tio estas ia karma venĝo." Sakuya spoke.
Annoyed dial-up noises came from Ibuki.
---
"Oh, man, this is minty...like, next-level minty." Sahir griped in his normal voice.
"I'll take minty over fifteen hours of...whatever that was." Natalia replied.
"Saku, I've gotta know...what was that language you were speaking?" Barbara asked.
"I...I don't know. And I'm hesitant to look into it." Sakuya replied.
"At least you could speak more than three words." Kibō said.
"At least you *could* speak." Ibuki griped.
"What was a book like that doing out where people might grab it?" Tabby questioned.
"I usually have my more sensitive tomes secured behind lock and key. I'd moved on to my wardrobe when you all arrived, and it slipped my mind. Sorry about that." Emily apologized.
"It was a simple mistake. No one was actually harmed. You said that was an old cookbook, didn't you?" Carrie asked.
"Yes, passed down through generations of my coven. I was looking for a pumpkin pie recipe for dinner tonight. Something my grandmother used to prepare for us when I was younger. The thing is, I'm only passable when it comes to baking. I'm not confident that I can make it as good as I remember it being."
"A confectionery crisis, is it? Well, I think we may have the answer to that little quandary." Kenneth said. The Artisan group all looked at Natalia.
"Oh, uh...hehe." She got sheepish again.
"Are you good at cooking, Natalia?" Emily asked.
"I mean...my Nana owns a bakery and taught me everything she knows. Everyone tells me I'm good at it..."
"*Just* good? I feel like heaven's been baked into an edible form and sprinkled with sugar any time I eat some of your cooking." Kat replied.
"You're only just saying that, Kitty Kat. You say the same thing whenever I give you a hug. Or when I do literally anything."
"I meeeeean...true."
"Besides, I'm not the only good cook here. Maxie knows his way around an oven, too."
"I've got some know-how, sure. But you're second to none when it comes to sweets and desserts. I'm more of a dinner kind of guy...but you beat me in that department, too." Max replied.
"D'ooooh, you guys are just trying to make me blush..." Natalia put her hood over her head.
"Less 'trying' and more like 'it's working', cutie." Ibuki patted her.
"If it isn't too much to ask, would you help me with this pie, Natalia? I have some things I'd like to go over with Carrie, and I would really appreciate some extra help with this." Emily asked.
"...ooookay, I'll do it. As long as that book doesn't make me sound like I'm in an opera again." Natalia conceded.
"Don't worry, I'll keep it under control this time. Looks like you'll be having familiar dessert tonight, Max."
"Ah, yeah, about that. I'm gonna be heading home with everyone else later." Max replied.
"Wait...you're going back?! Why didn't you say so earlier?!"
"Not for good! Not yet, anyway. Just for a day or two. I want my mom to know I'm doing alright. I was gonna ask your old man about it later."
"Oh...right, then. In that case, I'll try to save you some of that pie."
"In the end, Maxie's a mama's boy." Sahir smirked.
"Shut it, Alvin." Max shot back.
"Before any of that, how's *your* wardrobe looking?" Barbara asked.
"It's fine."
"Nuh-uh, that's not gonna work. You're not going in front of Mama looking like a slob!"
"I was gonna say, have you cut your hair since you've been here at all?" Ibuki asked.
"Sorry, I haven't had my hairdresser around." Max replied.
"Well you're out of excuses now, pal! C'mon Babs, let's spruce this bumpkin up!"
"Right, no more New York youth pastor vibes for you!" Barbara affirmed.
Both women grabbed Max and started dragging him out. "H-hey, come on! Don't gotta be so forceful..." he griped.
"What was that about not being the butt, Maxie?" Sahir quipped.
"Don't act like you haven't missed us, Sparky!" Kat teased.
"Good grief." Kibō uttered, before following the three out of the apartment.
"Never a dull moment, is it?" Emily asked.
"Well when this is the first time we've all been together like this in a hot minute, there's bound to be chaos." Kat replied.
"It's actually reassuring, with everyone so lively. Are you all going to stay put?" Carrie asked.
"It's probably for the best, lest we get lost in this jungle of iron." Sakuya replied.
"We'll just have to steer clear of any suspicious artifacts while we wait." Kenneth surmised.
"By that you mean quite literally anything in this apartment..." Tabby replied.
"Don't worry, I've got anything dangerous locked away where no one can reach them. Feel free to use the TV. And it goes without saying, but please stay out of my room. I'll have my security detail watching your every move." Emily advised.
"Craaaaw."
"I have a sneaking suspicion he'll be watching some of us more than others." Sakuya said.
"Not too closely, if he wants to keep his beak." Sahir responded.
"Please don't assault the bird, Kicks." Kat said.
"With that all settled..." Emily levitated the cookbook into her hands. "...this way, Natalia. We'll get started on that pie."
"Long as there's nothing weird in that kitchen..." Natalia got up.
"Give me a few minutes to get her settled, Carrie." 
"Take all the time you need." Carrie replied.
"I'll be right in. Behave yourself, Muno."
"Caaaaaw."
"Why do I not trust that chirping?" Sahir questioned.
---
"D'oh, come on, Maxie! You've gotta have more than one nice suit in here!" Barbara griped, while sifting through her brother's closet. Ibuki and Cindy were with her.
"What's wrong with that one?" Max asked.
"He-llo! Look!" Barbara got behind Ibuki, and held up the latter's hands, to her confusion. "Look at this fiery beauty you're gonna be walking in with! Stunning, optimistic and full of life! And you're gonna walk in with a dull blue?! Don't you know coordination is everything?"
"Babs, you're gonna make me fall for ya if ya keep up with the sugar." Ibuki said.
"I've tried to get him to spice up his wardrobe, but dude just wants to look bummed all the time." Cindy added.
"Oh come on, why are you siding with her?" Max questioned. "And seriously, Barb, you're the last girl who should be griping about something being blue when that's *80% of your wardrobe*."
"Hush, my blues are elegant, vibrant and cheery." Barbara posed to focus on her blouse, flashing both the highlights in her hair and her nails. "A happier shade wouldn't hurt, you know."
"You and I have been wearing the same shades of blue since the day Mama brought us home from St. Francis. Why's it a problem now?"
"It worked when we were coordinating for a 5th grade talent show. But now that you've got a girl on your shoulder, you should put in the extra effort."
"I don't got a problem with something a little darker." Ibuki interjected.
"If I can just drop my two cents in the bucket, if it's a Thanksgiving dinner, then it doesn't have to be too bright. A duller pallette goes better with the harvest theme, anyhow. Plus it's gonna be a small party, right? It wouldn't be the worst thing ever." Cindy expressed.
"I know that, but still. I want you to lighten up a little, Maxie. Ever since you got back, you've had this grim and serious aura around you. I just want you to be happy, that's all." Barbara said.
"I'm perfectly happy. Totally." Max replied.
"That the truth, cinnamon roll?" Ibuki asked.
"Not gonna lie, on his bad days he can be a real downer." Cindy replied.
"Oh, come on..." Max griped.
"I wasn't finished! He's done a whole bunch to make everyone here a lot happier. My sister's getting along a lot better with us ever since Maxie got her to vent. He's taken all sorts of bad hits since he got here, but I haven't heard him complain once. He could stand to smile a bit more, but, y'know. Details."
"So could you please lay off on me about the suit, Barb?" Max asked.
"I still think you need to brighten up your closet! It looks like a funeral in there!" Barbara replied.
"Ugh, there's no winning with you. Keeb, could you back me up here?"
Kibō was drinking a Slurpee. He took one look Barbara's way. She was staring directly into his eyes. Max put his hand over Kibō's face.
"Don't let her intimidate you, dude. Be your own man!" Max ordered.
"I sense that involving myself in this would be a critical, costly mistake. I plead the fifth." Kibō replied.
"Thank you, big guy~." Barbara chimed.
"Oh sure, *now* you know what that means!" Max griped.
Someone else walked into the room. "Oye, sparkster. Ya left your door unlocked aga--" Anna spoke.
She stuttered upon seeing Ibuki. "--aaaaabs, woman with aaaaabs..." the former uttered and focused in on the latter's bare midriff.
"Uhhh, you seeing something you like, missy?" Ibuki asked.
Max whistled. "There a reason you walked in without knocking?"
Anna palmed him away. 
"Hey!"
"Hola. I like your abs." she uttered.
"Um, thanks, I guess?" Ibuki responded.
"Eyes elsewhere, she's spoken for. And so are you, for that matter." Max said.
"Jess would like her abs." Anna replied.
"Okay, I think that's enough of that, Annie." Cindy got between them.
"Huh? Annie?" Barbara asked.
"Like the little orphan girl, yeah, I've heard it before. Anna's the whole of it, chica." Anna replied.
"...! Hold up. What'd you say your name was?" Ibuki asked.
She thought back to the last person that called people 'chica'. That same person had mentioned the name 'Anna'.
"Got your attention, do I, hot stuff? You got an Anna where you come from?" Anna asked.
"Uh...Barb and Maxie's mom is named Annie, so that's why I thought it was kinda funny." Ibuki replied.
"Hunh. Alright." Anna took a pause. She knew Ibuki was lying. And why. "Hey, so if I've got this right, you're this bozo's #1, ain't ya?"
Max grumbled in response to this.
"I'm just askin' cuz...my mom got sent over to your neck of the woods, and she snatched up a bunch of kids. And unless I'm rememberin' wrong, Maxie mentioned that his niece got taken, so that'd mean..."
"So that lady was your mom. I didn't wanna say anything cuz, well...it was bad. Like, I shot her in the leg with an arrow." Ibuki replied.
"If it helps any, she shot me in the arm once." Max spoke.
"Now I just shoot him in the heart." Ibuki turned red. "WOOOOOW that was corny."
"You...shot him in the arm." Anna asked.
"To be fair, I was asking for it. I attacked her with a giant robot first." Max replied.
"You had a giant robot and you didn't tell me?!" Cindy exclaimed.
"Cuz I destroyed it and I don't like thinking about that time."
"It was pretty extra, if I'm being honest about it." Barbara commented.
"Says that girl that has to do a little dance number every time she uses her powers."
"We're goin' off the rails here, people!" Anna interrupted. "All I'm gettin' at is...sorry for what my mom did. She's really sick, and she was off her meds for way too long."
"I could tell that much from how she was talking. I'm sorry we had to rough her up when she obviously wasn't all there." Ibuki replied.
"Her bein' sick ain't an excuse for kidnapping someone else's kids. She's back in her cell, out in Alaska. She feels like shit over what happened. You probably won't believe it, but she was a great mom when she got the chance to be. Before...he lost it and took her down with him."
"Who's 'he'?"
"Johnny, the guy we fought on the island. He's Anna's--" Max answered.
"Stop. Stop, just...don't say it. The less I have to hear it, the more I can pretend it ain't the truth." Anna stopped him.
"Yikes. I can see how your mom ended up that way, then. That guy...just looking at him gave me the chills." Barbara said.
"And he tanked our best hits and kept on flapping his yapper." Ibuki added.
"He was a tough S.O.B. even before he started dabbling in the spooky shit. I'd have 'em drop a nuke on him if I wasn't half-convinced it'd make him even worse. It'd help if I could just..." Anna stopped herself. "I'm gettin' too distracted. I've got a message from Maxie One to Maxie Two."
"Why am I Maxie Two?" Max asked.
"Cuz you're a seaweed-brain, alright? He wanted to let ya know he got the approval for yer trip back home. On one condition."
"Conditions are always great."
"One of us has to go with ya. Supervisin'. Case ya feel like takin' the 787 back to Tokyo."
"I'll go with!" Cindy stated without hesitation.
"No, Cind." Max replied.
"C'mon, every time I go to your world, I have to zip right back! It'll be fun!"
"Your sister is making the desert for your dinner tonight. I know how much it means to have her around for the holiday. I won't be the reason you miss it."
"Ultraboy's right, Cind. I'll go." Anna said.
"What, no, Annie! It's already gonna be awkward without Candy and Aunt Bobbi. What are we gonna do without your dirty jokes?" Cindy asked.
"Tell Aunt Letty to put away the swear jar, for one. It'll be more awkward I'd you're not there to gush about Luna's cooking."
"But..."
"Girlie, Luna's sittin' down for Thanksgiving dinner with the three of ya. Willingly. And she's makin' dessert. It's everything you've ever dreamed of. I'll be fine. I ran and saw Mami already. I'm good, really."
"Hold on, I thought you said your mom was in Alaska?" Barbara asked.
"Well when I scrapped with her, she had this crazy speed. Thinking you got that from her, yeah?" Ibuki assumed.
"Ha, brains to go with the brawn and beauty. Ya lucked out, my dude." Anna replied.
"I tell myself that every day I wake up." Max replied.
"Welp, guess I'd better get myself a change of clothes and a toothbrush. Time for a mini-vaycay to...where'd you say you're from, again?"
"Tulsa."
"Right, the plains. Y'all don't live in a tent, do ya?"
"No, we don't live in a tent!" Max and Barbara said at the same time.
"There's the Twinbrain at work." Ibuki said.
"Do they, like, finish each other's sentences?" Cindy asked.
"No, we don't!" the twins said in unison.
"Y'all are gonna love me at dinner." Anna smirked.
---
It was a couple of hours later. Max had finished packing his things into a case. He was going home. For a couple of days, at least.
"Got your undies all tucked away, Sparky?"
He turned around to find a black cat sitting on his bed, waving her tail around. "Meoooow~."
"You know, you could've just knocked." he said.
"N'yeah, I could've." She turned back to normal. "You excited about tasting your Mama's cooking again?"
"Oh lord, you have no idea. In the last two years, I've seen my mom for about an hour. I'm just thinking that I'm not gonna want to leave again."
"Try not to think about saying goodbye all over again. You're getting a couple days with your three best ladies. After the last few months you've had, I'd call that a good enough reward."
"And all I had to do was get stabbed and punched a lot."
"Well hey, if it makes you feel any better, London's been a time and a half for me, too." Kat lifted up her tank top to reveal a scar on her lower abdomen. "Guess we're even now, huh?"
"Everyone's always ragging on me for playing hero. And here you are taking a hit for a friend."
"I'm taking cues from you now. You should be flattered."
"Oh, I am. Intensely."
The two stopped talking. Kat gave Max a look of concern.
"What's with the face? That's the 'you're not being honest with me' look." he asked.
"Are you happy, Sparky?"
"Of course I'm happy. I'm going home for a couple days, I'm finally getting used to living here, and I'm gonna have a very pink apartment waiting for me when I go back for good. Why wouldn't I be happy?"
"Max. I know when you're lying. You know and I know that you want nothing more than to run for the hills and live happily ever after with Bookie. You've got enough credit in the bank here to make that happen. Why don't you?"
"...I really can't get anything past you, can I?"
"Like it or not, we're the same. I can read you easier than a travel brochure. Tell your best pal Kitty Kat what's going on in that block head of yours."
"...I want to go home. For good. The people here have been so welcoming to me when I thought I didn't deserve any sort of kindness. The one thing that's keeping me from going back is...I have to repay them. There are monsters out there. You saw for yourself. If there's even a chance that I can help them put those animals to bed for good, I'm gonna do it."
"Gonna do the right thing even if it hurts you. You really don't change, Sparky. You're gonna get yourself killed playing hero again, then what are we gonna do? What are Barbie or your mom or Bookie gonna do?"
"You just showed me the stab you took for someone. You're the last person to tell me not to play hero."
"Think about the people that love you, is all I'm saying. Don't throw away your life if you have a chance of getting away. I know what you're gonna say, 'I AM thinking about them'. Think a little harder."
"Okay, okay, I'll be more careful. Message received."
"Just doing my duty as Krew Kween."
"You literally just made that up."
"I literally didn't."
Kat got up, and gave Max a hug. "I love you, you blockhead."
"Yeah, I love you too, you crazy girl."
She smacked his shoulder playfully. "He finally says it! I'm so telling Bookie about this."
"Do that and I'll ban you from going anywhere near my sister's legs."
Kat gasped. "You would NEVER."
"I would. I'll wrap them up in chains. I'll put the key where you'd never find it."
"Empty threats, I can pick any lock you can find!"
"I'll go digital."
"You're wounding me, Sparky."
The two continued their bickering as they left the apartment.
A short while later, inside the P.D.F. building, the entire Artisan crew were in front of a large, circular device. Cindy was manning the controls. "Okay, people, here's how it's gonna go! Soon as I get the coordinates, walk on through if it's your turn!"
"So like, if we're a second too early, are we gonna end up in the Mojave Desert or some other world only populated by hyper-intelligent naked mole rats?" Sahir questioned.
"That scenario is far too specific for you to not have thought of it several times." Kenneth commented.
"Alright, Anna, you remember what the plan is?" Max asked.
"I'm hoppin' in with the Japan crew, runnin' over to your place, gettin' everything you need--" Anna related.
"Without digging through my drawers." Ibuki interjected.
Anna sighed. "--runnin' over to LA, gettin' Sir Pointed Hair and Bobbi Two's things, then sprintin' over to your Ma's place in Tulsa. Got the addresses, the keys and the list of everythin'."
"And you're sure you can zip through all that without getting noticed?" Kibō asked.
"I could've got all of it done in the time it took to yammer all that. I'll probably beat ya to Oklahoma."
"If there's one thing you're not gonna beat this girl in, it's a test of confidence." Max replied.
Cindy pressed the buttons on the controls. The circular machine began to light up. A blue portal, resembling a massive whirlpool, appeared within it. "Okay, it's set to Earth-727's Tokyo! All aboard the transdimensional express!"
"Well friends of mine, it's been a touching reunion, but alas, the time to part from your astral beauty has arrived--" Sahir began.
Sakuya covered his mouth. "Silence is golden, Sahir-kun. It's been wonderful to see everyone again. Next time, I hope it's for a situation far less chaotic. Good luck in your academic endeavors."
"You too, Saku. Safe travels~." Barbara bid.
"See ya when I see ya, Cind. Save a piece of Luna's pie for me, will ya?" Anna asked.
"You got it! Bring me some candy, or something!" Cindy replied.
The three went inside of the portal. "OK, next up is London!"
"Well guys, it's been fun. I'm sad it doesn't happen so often anymore." Kat said.
"That just makes it all the more special when we can work together again." Carrie replied.
"...ooooh, I need one more hug!" Natalia embraced Barbara.
"Awww, you're gonna make me cry now, Natty. We'll be back together soon enough, I promise." Barbara assured.
"Boy do I hope so, beautiful. Tell your mama we said hey, alright?" Kat asked.
"We'll do just that. And hey, Tabby?" Max asked.
"Ah! Y-yes?" Tabby was caught off-guard.
"Keep your head up. You're in good hands with this crazy bunch."
"Just try not to learn...too much from old Katty Tatty." Ibuki teased.
"Hey, you trying to say I'm a bad influence?!" Kat griped.
"If the shoe fits, Katherine." Kenneth quipped.
"Y'all are too cruel. My heart is aching."
"Um...thank you, Max. I'll do my best." Tabby assured.
"See ya round, beautiful people. I'll be in your next dream, making it so much better."
"Goodbye, crazy person." Max waved with a smirk.
The London group departed. "Alright, all calibrated for Tulsa! Say hi to your mom for me, Maxie!" Cindy called out.
"Will do. Have fun with your family. Hope it's as good as you've always wanted it to be." Max responded.
"Yep, me too! Bye-byeeee!"
"Let's go give your mom a mini heart attack." Ibuki said.
So the four walked through the portal. The moment Max had been longing for was here. For a little while, at least, he was going home.