Holiday

== WARNING: CONTAINS MATURE CONTENT AND SOME LANGUAGE ==
Holiday, by Skye
==CHAPTER ONE:Road Trip==
The air vents pumped out the cool mechanical air at a steady pace. The space was slightly to cold for my tastes, but my discomfort was so minimal, it wasn't worth mentioning. My legs were squished behind the divers seat, but not to where it was uncomfortable. 
The green shrubbery outside the window was closer to a faded green, almost brown coulor. 
That's what all of Australia's green is like. Like its been brushed with a cloud if dust for good measure.
I have my hair up in a simple clip, I can feel it loosening. And, since I'm on holidays, I let it look imperfect. Next to me sat Abby, gorgeous Abby. Abby's about 7, and I'm completely in love with her, she has thin bright blond hair, like mine used to be. She has beautiful blue eyes, and perfect porcine skin. She has a small birthmark just below her eye. It's not pretty, but it's not ugly either. It's just there. I like to think it makes her whole. She has a wide smile that she shows of at every opportunity. Although she's not my sister, I like to think she is what my little sister would be like. 
She sits next to me blasting taylor swift in my iPod. She takes my iPod at every opportunity, which I'm totally okay with. Her head bops as she listens to "you belong with me". 
Next to her sits him. Beautiful, amazing him. He has the same coulor hair as his sister abby, and the same blue eyes. his top lip is slightly smaller then his bottom, but it matches his face completely. He smiles at me softly as he sees me staring. He brings his finger at his perfectly shaped lips, and singles me to be quiet. I'm not saying anything, so I'm somewhat confused at this gesture, before he points to both his partners in the front seat. Then does it click. Neither of our parents know about out relationship. So I nod silently and turn back. Hiding the biggest smile. Abby catches my eye, and looks at me oddly. 
"What?" I say after a while. Her eye brows furrow, and she wears a sneaky smile. For a seven year old, she's far to smart. 
"Nothing." She says dismissing her suspicion. 
I guess since Ben and I have known each other for three years, and being the best of friends mind you. Both our family's have put away there suspicions of possible relationship that they had when we first met. I remember Ben went though about and hour grilling session by his mother. That consisted of mainly trying to force information about me, and what his intentions were with me. At the time, our relationship was purely innocent. Neither of us had romantic intentions. 
The day we met, it was raining, and cold. In the middle of winter. I had decided to go to the local bookstore, since I had read all of my book twice over. I wore a blue top that cut slightly into my chest, but showed nothing to important. A long flowly brown skirt, with intricate and swirly patterns. My hair was up in a messy and boring bun. I got dressed with no one in particular in mind. 
I was peering in the "teenage fiction" section. When a little boy, about five was in the section next to me, reached for a book. I walked up to the book, and he pointed to which one he wanted. Once I got the affirmative nod, I slid it out of its position and passed it to him. He was overjoyed to receive the book that was out of his reach. 
"Thank you." He said in his perfectly innocent voice. 
"no problem at all. Is there anything else you wanted?" His big blue eyes looked at me in complete awe. 
"why don't we stop bothering the nice lady?" A boy said walking up from behind him. Blue eyes blond hair, just like, what I was guessing, his brother. 
"oh it's not bother at." I say politely. 
"It's okay, he just wanted to get your attention. He can't even read, can you Declan?" He says looking down, Declan's face was bright read. 
"Shut up!" He says folding his arms at the older one. 
I let out a small chuckle. 
"That's okay Declan. I guess your brother has the duty to read it to you now anyways." I smile, I could tell he was right at ease. 
"How could you tell?" The older boy said referring to me picking them, out as siblings. 
"Just the way you act. Very. Brotherly." I say nodding. I drop a book as I do. I mentally punch my face, and then lean down to pick the, up. Before I can get to the ground, the older boy has already picked them up for me. 
"Why thank you," I say with a winning smile, picking up the books. As I do, my hand brushes against his. It's not big deal to me, but apparently to him is is. He face painted it self a bright cherrie coulor. At the time, I had No idea what he was blushing at, so I just looked at him oddly. 
"I'm ugh...I'm Ben." He stutters. My brow furrows with confusion. One moment he's completely slick and smooth, now he's. stumbling?
"We'll..good for You" I laugh. Declan laughs with me. As I'm about to ask him about the books in his hand, my pocket vibrates with a message. I take out my phone and read.
[ I'm outside.] the messages from my sister. 
"we'll it was great meeting you to. But I have to get going. I guess. Will see you....never." I laugh. Ben shoots me a big smile, and to my surprise Declan hugs my legs. I hug him back and turn around. 
"Wait what's your name?" Ben asks me.
"Who knows, I'm just the mysterious girl in the book store." I smile, and walk out the door, not before catching his eye, and his grin. I hear what sounds like Declan punching Ben.
Ben wears the same grin he did that day. But with a much more matured face. And body to match. He has a small bit of stubble surrounding his jaw, and his Adams apple is prominent now. Bens tall, and very well built. Completely ripped as I like to say. He has a strong 6 pack, and his muscles blare though his grey top. 
I feel my pocket vibrate,and I take my phone out to read the massage. 
[ you look stunning. Wish I wasn't so far away. ;) -B] I grin at the message and slightly bring my eyes to to Ben,who's staring out the window with a cheeky smile.
[am I blushing?] I type back. 
A few seconds later my phone vibrates again. 
[idk, I'm sitting to dam far away!]i giggle at the message, and Abby looks at me. 
"What's funny?" She asks. 
"You!"I say putting my phone back in my pocket and kissing her nose, as we do, and she 
kisses mine back. It's like our secret handshake. 
"Get a room you to!" I hear Declan say from the back. Declan and Abby are twins. But completly different. Declan is the outspoken and cheeky one. While Abby is quiet happy to sit back and watch the madness happen. 
"Just because your Jelous!" Ben says slightly louder then his usual tone so Declan can hear. It's no secret that Declan has had the biggest crush on me for 3 years. It's cute really, but he still blushes. Ben winks at me and he smiles, Turing back to the window. 
We've been traveling for about an hour an half. And as we get closer and closer to the destination I feel my stress melting off. 
With all drama happing with our family lately, there's no question we needed a vacation. 
I dropped hints here and there that it shouldn't just be our family, and we should invite another family to. Eventually, my parents took those hints, and invited the macdonlads. 
And who happens to be in there family? That's right, my serect boyfriend.
And where are we going? We're camping on a beach for the week.
==CHAPTER 2: Just Friends==
"So Skye tell me, do you have a special someone in your life?" Killi asks from the front seat while looking over her shoulder. Kille isn't the prettiest person in the world, but she does have stunning eyes. They are dark brown, and oval shaped. 
I glance over nevervously at Ben, he looks out the window casually. He knew I would know 
how to play it. He wasn't worried, so why should I be?
"No not at the moment.." I expect a Sympathetic smile from her. But instead she turns her whole body towards mine. 
"Really? Because, I know one of bens friends who would be absolutly PERFECT for you." I've always been close to kille. We would stay up late talking while she pours cups if coffee into me, she told me once that she loves to talk to me because it doesn't make her feel like a mum. She feels like a teenager, young and free. Maybe that's why she's trying to set me up. 
"Who?" I hadn't even noticed that Ben is now sitting up, and it alert, even asking his mother who it is. 
"Jake. You know that lovely young boy that you hang out with." She says sounding about 80 years old. 
"Jakes a sleaze bag." He dismisses settling back into his chair. 
"We'll, he seems quiet kind. And" she turns back to me. " he's quiet a looker." She winks. I try not to snort with laughter. It's unattractive, and it's considered rude. 
"No mum. Your not setting her up with jake. It's not going to happen." He says rolling his eyes. 
"We'll it's not up to you." She says getting some what annoyed. Ben sits up a bit taller, and I see his jaw twitch. Okay, I know I, ment to be defusing the situation. But seeing him fight for me has never made me more excited. 
"No, it's not going to happen, he's a sleaze bag. Skye's my friend, and I wouldn't set anyone up with that idiot. She deserves more then him." He raises his voice, the entire car goes silent. We all look at Ben while he relizes what he just said. "We'll it's true" he says shrugging. 
"Why do you even care? It's not like your dating her?" The way kile phrases the sentence it's more of a question then a statement. 
"We'll of course not. I don't mind who Skye dates, as long as he deserves her, she can go right ahead." He says causally. 
"We'll fine then. Alright kids, we have a mission then. We must set Skye up with someone!" I laugh, and so does Ben. Even though I know he's somewhat peeved inside. 
Three hours later we finally arrive. The rest if the trip was extremely exhausting . the entire family went though guy after guy, trying to find one for me. it was draining, i had to come up with a new excuse for each boy they Presented. 
"well, maybe you will meet someone here then." we finally settled on killies suggestion. Turns out we're not actually camping, but, were staying in a cabin of sorts. The scenery is gorgeous. The ground is lined stale red and green leaves, and the tress sprinkle more. 
The park has over 100 cabins. Fortunately,the one we stay in, accommodates both our family's. The macdonlads invited me to go with them in there car for the trip. I happily excepted. 
The car rolls in, and parks in the "visitors parking." 
"Ok, we have to go get our keys and stuff. Now, does anyone need a toilet break?" Peter says from the drivers seat. Peter is none of the kids real father. There real father, Jason. Died when the twins were 3 and Ben was 11. 
I didn't know Ben then, but, I imagine it was extremely difficult for him. He avoids the subject. But occasionally I will a catch a glimpse into his previous life. He will relay Magnificat stories of him and his father going for week long camping trips. They would share a tent, hunt all day. His father taught him how to clean and skin all animals. Of course being a vegetarian myself, these stories completely grossed me out. But, Ben rarely spoke of his father, but when he did, his worried expression faded, and he has a gleam of innocence in his eyes. Something, i rarely see. 
Of course, when Jason died, Ben took over as family head. And therefore, Ben don't care for Peter much. He admits his a great dad to the twins, and is happy he's there. But according to Ben, no one but his blood father is good enough for kellie. Peter is a nice enough guy. He strikes me as a serious and clam man. But when you see him with the twins, he's very deferent. He's defiantly the fun parent to those to. 
"Me!" Abby says shooting up her little arm. 
"Me to!" Declan says from behind me. They both wiggle there way out of the seats. Stomping in the pillows surrounding us. 
"What about you to?" Kellie says taking off her seat belt. I look over to Ben, and we both make a silent agreement to be alone for a few moments. 
"Nah I'm good." I say carelessly. 
"Ditto" Ben says. 
"Alright." Kellie says. She climbs out, and grabs the twins hands. 
"Smooth." I say to Ben who's sitting with a smirk on his face. He turns to me and furrows his blond eye brows.
"What?" He says. 
"He doesn't deserve me? HA, real smooth. Now there gunna be searching for someone who does deserve me." I say with a grin on my face. I'm not taking the situation very seriously. Neither is he. 
"We'll. they will be searching forever." He mumbles. 
"What?" I say not comprehending him. 
He looks over his shoulder, both his parents are out of sight, already in the office filling out some paperwork. 
"I'm just saying, no one on this earth is good enough for you." He says. I can do nothing but smile. What a perfect guy. I unbuckle my seat belt, and scoot over next to him. I give him a small kiss on the cheek, and settle in next to him. I rest my head in his strong chest, and his arm gently traces my skin on my thighs. 
"What are we going to do?" I ask breathlessly.
"I don't know. Guess we just have to try and. Be cool. " he says. 
"Yeah but. I want to spend my romantic week with you!" I say sitting up. My hand now rests on his chest, just between two of his perfectly formed abs. 
"I promise you we will find time. Okay?" He says cupping my jaw with his palm. 
I smile, and decided that we better separate before they come back. I scoot back over to my spot. I settle back in, and Ben takes my hand. 
"You really do look stunning." He smiles. 
==Chapter 3: Settling In==
I've never been the classic girl. But I did know a few simple "girl" rules. 
And in that invisible girl rule book, one of the most important rule, had to be. "Overpacking". I t was simple guideline. 
Overpacking: When packing to go on a vacation, pack the complete essentials to living. And your packing, becomes "overpacking."
Apprently my essentials include. 2 pairs if shoes, about 80 different floor length skirts. About 20 different hippie singlets. Around 6 belts. And countless pairs of underwear and bras. 
Along with those. I have an entire section just for make-up. I also brought a whole other bag just for books. I brought 9 books with me. All completely essential. One if them, of course a notebook, to write. 
Needless to say, my suitcase was heavy. It was hard to haul up the ramp, but when I did. I was wrapped to find my room. My parents being perfectly sensible. Put all of us kids in the one room. The room had 6 bunks. We only used five however. Because my two older sisters decided they wold just sleep in the other double bed together. That one was in a whole other room. 
"Skye's choosing first. Skye, what bunk would you like?" Ben asks me stoping Abby from climbing to the very highest bunk. 
"Ahh well thank you Ben. I chose. That one!" I'm pointed to the one at the end of the room. It's sitting right next to another bunk. Abby if course, chooses the top bunk. Being seven and all, it's pretty exciting to be so high up. Ben expertly chooses the bunk that is RIGHT next to mine. It's about a middle fingers length apart. I smile has he puts his suitcase in the bed I struggle with mine to hoist it up. Ben walks next to me, and heaves it up in one effortless swift move. 
"What are you iron man?" I say in awe. 
"No but I can lift him to." He smirks. 
"Smart arse." I laugh. Lucky none of the kids heard that. After I unpack my books, and shove them under the bed, my brother enters the room. Already looking hot and bothered. My brother is a great guy, but, he's my brother, 
He's annoying, just as any older sibling is. He will simply throw a pillow at your face. Because he can. He also has a knack to find the negative in the most positive of a situation. 
"Longest.drive.ever." He says hoisting his suitcase in the bottom bunk in the other side of the room. Declan sits up from the same frame work, but in the top bed. 
"Hey Jesse." He smiles. As he says his name, the "s"become all slurred, Declan has a wonderful lisp to his voice, it's extremely endearing. 
"Hey big D" he slaps Declan hand, and then whips it so there fingers lock. I guess it's some kind if a handshake. I don't know. Boys.
"So, what do you guys wanna do?" Abby says while jumping from the top bunk. I lift her in my arms and she sits happily in my hip. 
"Why don't we....go...EXPLORE.!" I say the last word with such excitement That both the twins face light up with joy. 
"Ben Ben. Can we go? Please?" Declan says jumping from his own bunk. I turn around so I'm facing Ben. 
"Yeah Ben please?" I ball my hands together so my fingers are locked together resting under my chin. I'm clearing mocking the act of begging. 
"Oh alright. Just go ask mum." He says bothered. They both run out of the room. I turn to my brother Jesse, who is already on his iPad, checking for service. 
"Is he coming?" Ben says wearily pointing at Jesse. 
" no. He'll be fine right there trying to find a signal." I giggle and so does Ben. Our 
A few moments later both the twins come running in. 
"Mum said yes!" 
We walkout the cabin, all four of us. 
"Hold my hands kids." Ben says. Abby immediately rushesto my side, and Declan to his side. So, Ben and I have to hold hands to. Clever Ben.
The place is simple enough to figure out. All the activities and games, are located near the head office, and the cabins, Towards the back. We all walk hand in hand down the resorts street. I catch a glimpse of a magnificent blue shade, a few more steps and I realize. This is pool. I'm known as a water babe, completely in love with the Water. I even let go of everyone's hands so I can run towards it. Contrary to popular belief, it's not ALWAYS hot in Australia. Like now, it was overcast. Not rainy or practically cold. But not exactly sunny. Either way I welcomed the sight of the massive pool. It extended to two meters deep! I run to the kids hate, and unlock it, me being quiet tall. When I do, I rush to the water,and put a single toe in. I notice the twins and Ben closely following me. 
I dip my toe in. 
"IT'S HEATED!" I yelp.what I do exit, is a purely skye act. That only I would do. I take off my hair clip and it clatters to the ground. I then strip off my top, and pants. I, left in only, my bra and underwear. I let out an excited cry,before diving into the perfectly comfortable tempture pool. The water is brilliant. I feel the tickle of the bubbles as I'm under, and I feel the rush of adrenaline though my veins. I stay under the water until I feel like my head will explode from lack of oxygen. And then I come up. What I'm challenged with, is three jaws spread wide open. Ben, Abby, and Declan have the mouth so wide open, that I can see all three of there tonsils. I let out a hug grin. 
Ben shakes his head with a small grin. Both the kids simultaneously look up at him at once, and he nods to them after a few seconds. They scramble to get there cloths off, and jump in the kiddie end. I swim up to the side of the pool, when ben Has kneeled down. I rest my arms in the brick and smile. 
"Your crazy you know that?" He says obviously pleased. It's been a long time since I've been this excited to do anything after my hospitalisation. 
"Yeah, I know." As soon as the last Syllable comes out, I grab bens arm, and hurl him into the pool. If he knew it was coming I would have no chance of getting him in. He's strength far outweighs mine. But he didn't see this coming, and now he's the one drenched, fully clothed. I swim about 3 meters away before he comes up for air. When he does, his usually spiked hair, sits like a bowl on his head. He wears a pout the is clearly meant to hid his grin. He looks at me a moment, and I laugh. Behind me the twins are drowning in laughter. So to speak. He bolts forward. Dam it, he's on the swim team where he goes to school. Despite being a well built, and muscly boy, he's deceptively fast in the water. He catches up to me in a matter of seconds, and dunks my head so I'm pushed under the water. Im still under the water, and bubbles float from my mouth. He lets me go after about three seconds, making sure to not take it to far. 
I come up and splash water in his face. He dives under the water, and before I know it, his tickling the bottom of my feet with his tongue. I let out a half drowned out laugh while grabbing my foot. He comes up out of the water, and swims to the other end of the pool with the twins. He takes off his shirt, reviling he's oh so perfectly shaped body. And leaves on his shorts. He turns around as he's about to dive back in the water, and winks at me. 
After about thirty minutes of play in the water, me giving Abby piggy back rides, and pretending we're mermaids with her. Kelli finally find us. 
"So this is we're you kids are hiding." She says. " I would have thought you would at least have waited until you got your swim suits." She says with a cheeky smile. In her hands she hold four towls. we get out of the water with Abby on my back, and grab two towels. 
"Where have you kids been?" My mother asks while holding a few pillows in her hands. I walk up to her and kiss her on the cheek. 
"Swimiming." I smile. I'm still in just my underwear. I go into my room, and get changed into a long loose purple dress. I tie my hair up, and happily slop on the couch. 
The noise from the beach is quiet, but steady. Even with the beach being a five minutes walk, and covers by a long row of thick tresses and bush. You can still hear it clearly. It's extremely relaxing. I notice in the corner of the room, is a massive spider. I don't really mind spiders, just as long as they stay in the roof. That's where they belong. Down here is my world, up there is theirs. 
"Hey there sexy." I hear from behind me, I immediately know its him, and glance around the room. 
"Shh. Don't want them to hear you." I say with my voice croaking. I'm still pretty sick. The last two days I've had a horrible flu. We were hopping it would fade by the time we got here, and it has. But my nose is still runny, and my cough is still apparent. 
"You know. I still havnt kissed you here yet," he smiles he looks over his shoulder, and leans in. He hold his lips to mind effortlessly, and repositions them. There's nothing better then Kissing a person you love. Is just nice. He breaks apart from me, and walks over to the kitchen. 
"Want anything?"he asks me.
"Nah, I'm alright." I say quietly. 
"Skye, we have been though this. You have to eat." 
I roll my eyes. I walk to the kitchen, and wrap my arms around his waist, with my chin resting in his back.
" I'll eat later. I promise." I smile. I can feel his body relax,the tension melting Away. He knows when I promise something. I never lie. 
"Good." We hear the slam of a door, and imeditally separate. I go to cutting some piece of cheese off the block, and Ben pretends his fishing for something in the cupboard. 
"How do you guys like the place so far?" My dad says emerging from the hall way. Ben and I both answer in unison. 
"It's great!" He punches me softly in the arm. My father sits himself in front if the tv, and presses the button on the remote. I guess that's his idea of a holiday. 
"Dad, can Ben an I go check out the beach?" I say without even looking at Ben. 
"Yeah sure, but no longer then an hour okay?" I nod hastily and run out the front door. Ben says something to my father, I can't tell what. They both laugh, and he comes out the door. We walk casually just walk for a while, until we out of sight, where we link hands, and run towards the line if bush. I giggle the entire way there. When we get there, it's a small pathway, into what looks like the beach, it's covered by dense bush. It looks like and ideal place to jump out of the shadows and murder someone I tell ben My thoughts and he laughs at me. 
"What! You can never be to careful." I say with a high pitched defensive, tone. 
"Alright Miss.Skye. I will protect you." He immediately picks up my legs, and swings me over his shoulder. I can do nothing but laugh, he runs the entire way, until the sound if the waves becomes much more apparent. I beat in his back to let me down, and when he does, I turn around to see the beautiful shore. 
It's completely empty. Not a soul in sight. Most if the time that would sound lonely. But the ocean takes no note of the lack of audience, it sits there stunning without any applause. The big blue, monstrous wave crash in at a claiming pace. It's absolutely gorgeous. I ve never admired something quiet so much, this was just a beach, I have grown my entire life on a beach. But. Is this is different, this is the first time in three years I've been truly. Relaxed. 
I've never felt so clam, and yet so excited and silly inside. It made the entire world bright, and beautiful. 
I grab bens hand and rush to the shore. My hair is still wet from today's adventure, my body shivers.
I dip my big toe in the water and immediately retract it, and run back to the sand. Ben still gripping my hand. It's far to cold to even think about going in. I dive onto the sand. Ben has a massive grin in his face. Seeing me relax, has set his mood alight. He has a look of complete joy in his face, eventually, I lay in the sand, and rest my head on bens thigh. He plays with my hair. 
"There's something different about you." He says. 
"What's that." I say bubbling out the seems.
"You....dare I say. Happy?" He cringes. I've always been a happy person. At least on the outside. Ben tells me that, even when I'm at my complete peak of joy. I have a dark, and overpowering sort of gloom in my eyes. Although crystal clear blue. 
So when he says I'm happy. I know what he means, he means the gloom is gone. And it is replaced with..joy. 
"We'll of course I am. I'm here for a whole week. With nothing to do but anything I want. Plus I have my boyfriend with me. What is there to be sad about." I say lifting my head up, and looking him into the eyes he's about to open his mouth, with some smart ares comment. But instead I silence it with a passionate kiss. And another. 
(...now there just....you know...."watching tv.....".....ok, an hour later"
Ben an I are somehow even more giddy when we return. Shona, my sister, asks us what we got up to. Ben and I share a Cheeky grin, and replys with a simple answer. 
"Nothing." She doesn't doubt the response. And goes back to reading her book. 
Ben discreetly taps my butt in the way to his room. 
==CHAPTER FOUR: Simpler Way Of Life==
The next day is slow. But, not in a bad way. Here, there's no such thing has Boredom. It's replaced with relaxing. Time is also irrelevant. For one, there's no simple way to tell the time. Ben has his Rolex his father gave him when he was 8. But he only wears that on special occasions. I have my phone, but really. There's no signal out here, so I see no need to charge it when it stared beeping at me because it had low battery.
Sure we have the iPad, and the computers, but really, there no need to know the time. We do everything out of neesicatiy. We eat when we're hungery.nDrink when were thirsty. Sleep when were tired. And shower when we smell. There's no need for designated times. It's, peaceful. 
I hear my sisters up at about 5:30 in the morning. They leave to do...whatever it is they do at that time. I fall back asleep. Then, I wake up, long after anyone else, my flu is worst in the mornings and night. My nose feels like it weighs about 79kgs. And I find myself coughing out a cat. So to speak. When I finally have the energy, I get up and stumble out of the room. The only one left still in bed is my brother. Snoring away. I walk out of the room, and the light beems into my eyes. I wait for them to adjust and when they do, I find the tissue box, Ben, the good guy that he is, has set out breakfast. Bacon and eggs. Everyone's eating. 
"Ahh, what's for breakfast." I say causally, bens in the kitchen serving some more eggs. 
"Morning Miss. Skye. And how did you sleep?" He says causally. 
"Alright. You?" 
"Yeah, very well thank you." He says. No ones really paying attention to our conversation anyways. There all busy in there own worlds. 
I sit at the table and serve myself, mindlessly. A bacon and eggs sandwich, usually, bacon. Or any type of meat for that matter, makes me gag. But, strangely, I actually feel my body craving it. My mouth salivating at the thought. I hesantaliy take a bite of the meat, half expecting to puke. But instead , the first nibble gives my body a craving to finish it. So I do. I scoff in the food, eventually the family relizes and they all turn there heads to me 
"Oh my Skye. Your eating. A pig." Faith, my sister says. 
"What? It's holidays!" A choirs of laughter around the table. And I turn to Ben, to see him smiling as if to say. "I knew it". I laugh, and continue eating. 
For three years, I refused to look at anything with meat. So it's quiet a change.
We spend the rest of the morning reading and watching the morning news.ben sits all the way at the other end of the couch. It seems like and impossible length. I knew where my body belongs, right now. In his arms, but the whole family crouches around the tv. He gives me a sympathetic look, and a small pout. My phone lights up. 
"I miss you to." The message says. Clearly sent for his phone. 
"Alright kids! Who wants to go into the small town just up the road?"my father says standing up. We all groan. 
"It has an old school candy store?"he adds with a slight temptation in his voice. The crafty devil. In a matter if seconds were all on our feet heading into our rooms to get dressed. I get changed into long black flowly pants that might as well be a skirt, and a grey singlet top. I put my hair up, and take my make-up bag to the bathroom. I apply the make-up and Ben silently comes in and begins to brush his tenth, as he does, he bumps the side of me, and then I bump him back. He slightly nudges more.
"Oh. It's on." I say. With In a matter of seconds his on the floor saying. "Mercy mercy!" 
We both know he let me win. He's just simply to strong. I mean, don't get me wrong. I'm a strong girl. But, he's far beyond my capability. I offer him my hand up, and he stands back up. We both laugh as I finish putting on my mascara, and he spits out the toothpaste. He wipes his mouth with the towel to his left. And I put back my make-up. I take a glance in the mirror. There's something I'm unsatisfied with, maybe my eye lashes aren't long enough, or my-
"You look perfect. Sexy as ever." He smiles and kisses me on the cheek. He winks at me in the mirror and travels back to his room. 
==CHAPTER FIVE: The Marketplace==
I've been to this small town many times, it's more of a street them a town. It has only old fashioned stores on each side of the street, and attached to those, is a house down the back. It has about 14 shops. It's extremely simple. First you start at one corner, walk down a, then you cross the street to the other side. And go down that one. Then your back to your car. It's very efficient. I've always liked coming here. It's was the kind if place, where you walk past a person on the street. And they smile, and as you how you are. I like that, it's a friendly old fashioned feel. Unlike the grottie city I live in. You walk up to someone in the street and ask them he they are, your almost sure to get a bullet In the head. Abby grabs my hand, and I smile. We diffinally have the whole little sister routine down pat. I'm in a impeccably good mood, and the first shop is a candle store. I get overly excited when I see it. I run in with Abby, the store has a brilliant Chrisendo of scents. It makes me feel free 
and wild. 
"Hello!" A bright voice comes from behind me. "Welcome to casts scents!" She says. It's a lady about 60 with dark long curly hair. She has deep brown eyes. But a friendly smile. "Is there anything I can help you with?" SHe says. Abby says away behind me leg. 
"Actually I think we're okay! Thank you though. Do you own the store?" I ask why smelling some orange candle. 
"Yes I do, I live out the back." She says. 
"Really? Wow, your house would smell amazing, I bet your the favrioite aunty." I smile. She laughs. 
"How'd you know?" She laughs, it was obviously a rhetorical question. Ben walks behind me. As I walk to the cabinet holding a bunch of decorated candle holders he comes next to me. 
"You know. It never ceases to amaze me." He says.
"What does?" I bubble. 
"Your ability. Your talent. Whatever you want to call it. You have such a kind and friendly manner with people. It's incredible. I've never seen such a social butterfly." He says. I look him dead in the eye, he doesn't have a hint of sarcasm in those perfect husky eyes. 
"Enough! My head will swell!" I laugh. 
"You two are so cute together. " the lady says. I'm sure I turn bright red. 
"Oh we're not a couple," Ben dismisses. 
"I never said you were a couple. You thought of that one all on your own." She smiles mischievously and walks away. Ben clicks his tongue. 
"I believe you were just, owned." I say to Ben. And walk out if the store. 
"Thank you for making me smell nice!" I say to the lady, she laughs and waves. Ben soon follows behind us. The rest if the family fall behind, sniffing the candles. We move on to the next store. Abby, Ben, and I. 
This one is a wood carving store, yes, it is as boring as it sounds. But only boring people get board. 
So, I was pretty hyped to test out the limits of my good mood. Turns out, a wood carving store, when with the right people can be rather fun. I walk around the table. It's lined with all different until nets and gadgets. I make a joke about each one, most if the only Ben would understand. The shop has another level to it, so you have to climb the stairs to get to it. As we are I say "of course, the stairs are wood," Ben spits out laughter, and the shop keeper is holding back a smile to. When we came in the store, the man behind the desk had immediately put us into the "teenage hooligans" category. So it was hard to please his unimpressed face. I felt a small jolt of accomplishment in my heart.
Our family's passed a few more stores, each one just as pleasant as the last. 
Finally we reach the ones where we all really excited to go to. Candy store. It has stripes outside the front if it, it looks like it's out if an old 60s movie. I love it. We enter, and were im ditzy flooded with couloirs. Jars full of colourful sugary treats. I looked at them all lonely, the ones that you had to chew were partially yummiest to my eyes. I'm that kid. The one that loves the chewy texture. I walk up to one if the jars that hold hard candy, diffferent shades and couloirs. It looks very sweet and delicious. Ben comes up behind me. 
"You know. These are my favrioute lollies," he says.
"Really? Why?" I ask. He eyes glaze over with a familiar look, this is the look he gets when he's thinking about his father, I know the next sent ace that haze coving those eyes will grow stronger, I was right. 
"My father had to by me a whole jar every year in my birthday, and he would come in and remind me to have one just before I went to bed." It's weird. He's happy when he speaks about his dad, but that haze that his blue eyes cower under is very apparent.
Ben doesn't speak much of his dad, and I don't like to bring it up. I kinda figure he doesn't because he feels like sharing his father with me would be like betrayingb those fond memories. Bens open with me about every subject every subject it this one. I never bring him up, because I don't want to invade that place, that he doesn't want me to go. But, when brings him up, I try to squeezes as much information about it as possible. 
"Really? Why?" I ask. 
"I'm not sure, I think it was just a tradition we had. Never really knew why, it was just...our little thing." He shrugs. I don't really know what to say next, so instead I just hug him. I'm not sure if its what he needed, but he accepted my arms anyways. our family's are used to Ben and I hugging. We did it often. Even before love sparked between us. 
"Thank you Skye." He says softly. 
==CHAPTER SIX: Music-less== 
When we returned home. None of us had much to do. We munched on our lollies. Faith and Shona went to sleep. Jesse went...where it is he goes. Declan and Abby were set up in the lougeroom watching a re-run of finding nemo. My parents were both laying In bed, my mother tapping on her iPod ,and my dad reading. Bens parents had went for a walk on the beach. Ben and I both retreated to the bedroom. We left the door slightly open, only by a hair so nothing looked two suspicious. I slouch on my bed, and Ben does on his.
"Ugh. I'm so exhausted!" I feel like a slob saying that, I've done practically noting, and yet I feel like I could pass out for hours, the best thing is. If I wanted to. I could. 
"Me to." I feel a but more at ease when Ben agrees, bens an extremely athletic 
Guy, when he's not with me. Be sure he's swimming, or on the football Felid, or soccer felid, or cricket field any field really. 
"I wonder how I friends at dele are doing?" When i say that I mean youngwriitersclub. That's what Ben and I call the website. Why? I have no idea. 
"I, sure there is like, no activity without you, they completely adore you there. They can't breathe without you." He laughs, 
"Oh come on. I'm not that important to the website. I mean, I sorta am, considering without my foundering it wouldn't be there, but, I mean. Take away the creating part. And I think. They function quiet well." I say. 
" I guess we will see. Either way, I know loverboy misses you. And NIKKIICOUS. And sniper-viper." (That's what he calls Ak). 
"Yeah. We're quiet a pair Nikki and I aren't we?" I say to Ben turning my head from the bunk sitting above me.
"Diffinally . It's actually kind if unnatural. But, it's cute." He smiles, and then a look of pure horror creeps into his face. "Oh my god. I just used the word cute, I'm Turing into a girl." I burst out laughing, but he stays completely white. Eventually he lets a smile into his expression. We spend the next hour chatting lightly, he gives my hand a massage, and I almost fall asleep on the spot. I glance over at my guitar, it's been about twenty four hours since I last played a song. 
"Wow. That's the longest I've been without music. The funny thing is. I don't actually feel like playing. I've never not wanted to play." I say to Ben. He don't look worried, inside I'm kind of stressing out, does this mean I'm loosing my talent?
"Don't worry about it, there a perfectly reasonable explanation." He says. 
"What's that.," I say sitting up. 
"We'll. you play music to escape your problems. To get your mind off your issues and find relaxing place. A palace to get away from the world right?" He asks. 
"Right" I say still waiting for the punchline. 
"Well. Maybe you don't need to escape this world. Maybe this one is calm enough for you to cope without the musical release." He says laying back down. He has such an insight into myself that no one does, I never would have never thought of that. But if course he did, because he's Ben, my boyfriend, Ben. I can say nothing, instead I roll onto his bead, and kiss him tenderly. 
"You know me so well." 
"Here." I hadn't even noticed Ben gone. I must have fell asleep when he was rubbing my feet. I woke to him passing me some sort of hot beverage. I was still in a haze. I looked out the window, and saw the darkness. 
"Morning?" I groaned. 
"No, it's about ten pm. You slept though dinner, thought you might like a chi tea." He says handing me the mug. 
"Aww. You made me my hippie drink. Thank you, that's really nice." I took a sip, and the hot liquid filled my mouth. It was just so good. 
"Here, your gunna need these to." He said passing me four white pills. 
"What are these" I say confused. I tend to be pretty crazy the first ten minutes of me waking.
"We'll, these to are your anti-psychotics. And these two are pannadine extra. For your head ache." He says effortlessly. I look at him in awe. 
"How did you know I had a head ache?" I ask. It's true, I had aheadache as soon as I woke. 
"You were having that dream again. Every time you do, you get a wicked headache afterwards. These pills will help with sleeping to." He says. 
"Oh. You know abut the dream." I say. I guess many nights of him sleeping over he's learnt the way my dream time works. About once every two nights, I have a reoccurring dream. A man raping me at age 11.
"Yeah. Who was it this time?" He asks. 
"Jake your friend." I say, he nods and looks at my toes. The dream changes each time. Each time, the man abusing me, is someone different. 
"Yeah. I guess he might have been in your head since the conversation. Maybe it was what your mind could burry up." He says. 
"Maybe." I say. I sip the chi tea, and Ben kisses my forehead. 
"The others will be here in a few minutes to go to sleep. We just finished a game of poker." Ben says. He lays in bed, and pulls the covers over him. I finish my chi, and sallow my pills. 
I put my mug back down. And as I do, the twins come pilling in. Followed by my brother. 
Abby runs up to my bed, and kisses my nose, I kiss her nose and she hastily climbs up the ladder to her bed. Declan looks at me neverously, and I give him a warm smile and hold out my arms. He runs to them happily, and I give him a big kiss of the forehead, Ben looks at me raising both eyebrows.
"Thought I'd give him something to dream about," I laugh, Ben just smiles and lays down. Jesse turns off the lights. As soon as everyone's settled in, Bens hand finds mine. The best thing about being in the middle of no where, is when it's dark. It's dark. No one can see anything, including our locked hands. I fall asleep with the gentle touch of the one i love.
There's not going to be any bad dreams tonight. 
==CHAPTER SEVEN: Bragging Rights==
In the morning, I wake up about eight. But, I don't get out if bed till nine thirty, I doze, and roll around, and pretty much just let my eye lids fall as they please. 
Eventually however, I do get up. And when I do, bens already awake. However, no one else is. He greets me with pancakes. And a kiss. 
"Good morning sleeping beauty," he says while putting his hands on my lower back, hand holding my hips to his. I loop my arms around his neck. 
"Good morning my prince." I smile. 
"And how did you sleep?" He asks. 
"Very well thank you. And you?" 
"We'll I had you next to me, so, perfectly." He replys. 
"Oh you really do have a way with words." I say letting the facade drop. 
"We'll, my girlfriends a writer I have to keep up." He laughs he lets go of me and goes beach to flipping a pancake he has in the pan. I set up the table, and go into each room. Waking everyone cheerily. When all the zombies finally make it out, the table is set. And breakfast is ready. We all eat, Ben taking a seat next to mine, resting his hand on my knee under the table. 
"Skye was talking in her sleep last night." Abby says innocently. 
"Oh really? What was she saying?" My mum says. 
"Oh. I really don't think we need to hear that." I say. I was dreaming of Ben last night. And I so pose that's what I was saying. 
"We'll. she was just mumbling anyways, so I couldn't hear any actually words. But she seemed to be enjoying it." Ben spits out his juice that he's sipping in laughter. 
I squeeze his knee really hard and he groans. I smile. And go back to eating my pancakes. He has a cheeky smile the rest of breakfast. 
After I clean the kitchen, and force the twins to load the dishwasher. There's nothing really left to do, my dad and Peter sit outside sipping beer and laughing far to loud. My bother and kellie lay in my parents bed sipping tea. Shona and faith both read books, and the twins watch tv. My brother Jesse watches with them. 
I make both Ben and I a coffee and we set our teeth into a rather serious game of Texas hold'em poker. The one game, that I know I can win at. I've been playing Texas hold"em since I was six. My father taught it to me,I became so developed In The game that eventually, my father and I would play it every day. Eventually the student surpassed the master. And I would win almost every single game. I then used to bring my set to school, and verse every kid who knew how to play. I never found my match. When I first met ben. he had no interest in poker. But I taught him the game, and it has become an ongoing contest between us. We don't play for money. We play for braging rights. During the entire game there is a whole lot of smack talk. I enjoy it, and so does he. 
"You ready to give up? You can always fold." I say holding a flush of diamonds in my hand.
"That's a lot coming from someone just about to be beaten by. Oh oh, look at this .Cowboys!" In his hand he holing two kings that he has turned around. He puts them beside the king in the river. 
I hang my head low, and breathe out. I hear muffled laughter, before I sit up, and flip my cards. 
"That's a nice hand. But can it beat oh oh, look at this. Your magisty a flush of diamonds." He jaw drops as he checks the cards. 
"But. But. I have cowboys!" He says in disbelief, I link my arms and cradle my sweet winnings. 
"And Im up four thousand." I laugh. He mumbles obscene things under his breath. 
I've always been good at poker. Mainly because Im good at reading people. There tells. It's after a few hands, I let them win, and I let the loose. Carefully observing the facial expressions and nervous ticks. Then, I smash them. It's simple, and it's easy. You just have to know what to look for. 
"You know. I told you would regret going into this game. Now, I believe, you owe me. What is it...fourthousand...into...ughhh fourth eight dollars please. Pay up." I smile. He takes out his wallet and gives me a fifty dollar note.
"Keep the change Im sure ill get it back the next time I smash you." He says. 
"What makes you think that's ever gunna happen?" I laugh. I take out my wallet and tuck away the money. 
I look over my shoulder, no one seems to be watching,so I whisper in his ear.
"Don't worry. Ill buy something pretty that I'm sure you will enjoy." He gins for ear to ear. And I walk back to my room as he watches my form all the way there. 
==CHAPTER EIGHT: Backstories==
I make myself a coffee and go out the 
Veranda. It's nice here, you hear the faint pleaset sounds off a bird chirping. The distinct smell of a gun tree that is recently wet. I sit at the white table and sip my coffee quietly. 
"Knew I'd find you out here." Keille says coming though the sliding door and sitting across from me. 
"Guess I'm that predictable." I say. 
"Only to people who know you." I nod in agreement. 
"Skye, how long have you known Ben?" Kellie asks me. I actually have to sit back and think about it. It's a difficult question. The first time I met Ben was in the book store, but that's not when I actually got to know him. 
I was a part of a band called, gone but not forgotten. In it consisted of about five members. I was there lead singer, and the drummers name was Adin. I had just joined the group the month before we were to have our first performance. Apparently, Adin played soccer with Ben. And Adin invited Ben along to see one of our performance. 
"Our lead singer is pretty hot." Apparently that what Adin had told Ben to get him to come to the performance. When he did, I hadn't picked him out in the crowd at first, but I was singing the song. "Come away with me." By Nora jones When I saw him. He seemed to be in complete shock that I was the very same girl that he had spoke to in the book store. When the performance was over, I sought him out in the crowed. 
"Bookstore guy!" Was my first line to him. 
"Mysterious bookstore chick." He said. That's where i got to know him. Three months later at the karaoke club.
"I say about...three years." I reply. 
"Hmm. What do you think of him?" She asks. 
"He's one of the best friends I've ever had. He's been really nice to me all three of those years, and especially considerate of me after my hospitalisation." I reply. 
"Yeah he's a good boy. Has he ever spoken to you about his dad?" She asks. I dont really know how to reply to the question. 
"Yeah. But rearly. I think he's still pretty wounded by it. So, when he does mention him, I try to just let him talk about it, and move on when he wants to." I say. 
"Yes. Has anyone ever told you how he died?" She says. I realize, that. No one has. 
"No. I don't think so." I say. 
"We'll. he died from brain cancer. He didn't tell any of the kids about it. Only me. He asked me not to talk about it either. When he." She chokes on the word." When he died. And Ben found out how. Ben was mad. And I mean furious." I've never heard this story. And it strikes me by surprise that Ben would possibly be mad. "He was completely ropable. He didn't speak for months. He spent all day on the football field. Until eventually he came back. And he was himself again. He would be the dad of the family. He would look after the kids and the house. He's done so much for this family." She chokes up somewhat. I put my hand on her arm. It makes more sense. People would point out to me all the time at en was extremely protective of me. Now I understand why. ."anyways. So I think the reason his dads death was so hard for him. Was because, at the time he thought of his dad as the only person in the world. At the time, bens life revolved around him. And he considered keeping such a big secret as extreme betrayal." I knew why shes telling me this. She's telling me so I know, that secrets, and lies, can't exist in our "friendship". 
"I understand." I say softly. 
"Your a good girl Skye. And Ben loves you a lot. But, you can't keep an secrets from him 
ever again. I know you kept how sick you were from him. You can't do that again." 
I nod. In other words. There is no secrets between Ben and I, or that's the end of us. 
==CHAPTER NINE: The Oyster Farm==
About 12:30 the entire cabin was buzzing, my father had rented a little dingy for us to go on the water with. I got changed into something warm, and poured out my coffee. The conversation with bens mum had my stomach unsettled. I needed to think about. I needed to be alone to think. Hard to do when you have a voice in your head. But, I still needed it. I knew that time would have to be later. 
We all piled into the cars, I actually got into my parents car this time, and Ben was already in his one. It would have looked suspicious if he were to get out to come with me to. So he had to stay. I'm kinda grateful to. I needed space. Not just from him, but from everyone, and everything. 
Once we make it to the warf, were all pretty excited. I try to play along. Abby attaches herself to my waist, and we walk out on the board walk. A man sits in the boat were ment to get on. With a bucket shovelling water out of it. It's at this point Shona starts to freak out. 
"No. I'm not getting in that. No, no way." She says backing away. "Looks dad! He's taking water out!" Shona is 22. So seeing her flip out is pretty funny. I try to bite my tounge. 
"Shona. It's from the rain last night." I say. She eventually nods. When it comes time to board. Shona is on the verge of a panick attack. Littlery. There are tears filling her eyes and she has her hands covering her mouth. Shona is tall, and well built. She's about six foot, and has big my bones. My mother is bearly five foot, and Shona cowers behind her. I try to hold in my laugh, and so does the rest of the family. My dad gets in the boat first, then my brother, then my sister, then me. Next is Shona, I'm in the boat, and I ask her to give me her hand. When she does, I notice the violent way it shakes. She eventually climbs into the boat. And we're off. Without the man mind you, my dad is up the back of the boat steering the motor. I sit up the font if the boat, and and Ben, all the way up the back. I don't want to be near anyone, least of all him. I don't know why though. Isn't this exactly what kellie warned me of? I can't keep things from him. 
Being absolutely honest about how I feel, or having no secrets. Is not my strong point. Mainly because I've been hiding some of the biggest secrets for the last three years. Of course, when I was hospitalised they all came out. But if it was up to me, I would never have told anyone. I like having my own secrets, even if it means it sends me spiralling down into a sueicaidal hole, to we're i eventually overdose. 
Ben was already worried for me, I could see it in his face, he knew it was neither the time nor place to talk to me about whatever was on my mind. We spent about forty five minutes just enjoying the water, the motor sent vibrations though my body, and it was the only noise I could hear. 
Mum, Shona, and Declan all got sea sickness. So they had each taken somthing before getting on board, none of them were in danger of throwing up. But they all felt pretty ill. So of course, my brother and Ben were in the back making puking noises, and rocking to boat all they could. Until both the mums yelled at them to stop. Along us was a scenic tour boat, a lot bigger then our little dingy. But, it wasn't "big", probably three times the size of us. We all laughed as we cruised past the boat. 
Im the first to notice the weeds, being at the front of the boat. We have been crusizing closer to shore then expected, and we hit the underwater weeds. I yelled at my dad to pull up the motor. He did having blind trust that I had a perfectly good reason. 
"There are weeds that will get caught in the motor. Better use the paddles to get us out of here. " I said, Shona and Peter each grabbed an oar and stared to row at a constant pace. It actually took us longer then expected to get out of the weeds. In the meantime, the cruiser holding all the old people cruised by, laughing at us this time. We hung our heads, and kept paddling, eventually we reached deep enough waters to put the motor back in water. When we did, we were off. It was pretty crusiy. My brother and Ben were in a pretty engaged game if slaps up the back. Eventually, my dads arms got tired, and they let Jesse my brother take over the steering. 
Abby comes up to me, and sits in my lap, while I sing "row your boat" into her ear. Up ahead I notice a buch of polls of wood sticking out if the water, so does everyone else. It took us a while to figure out that we were entering a oyster farm. And there was no turning back once we relized. We all yell at my brother to turn around, but by then it's to later, the motor makes a awful spluttering noise, and I hear a scrap below the boat. 
"Whoa what was that?" Faith says.
I take Abby off my lap, lean over the edge, below me is a wooden panel with netting. 
"It's an oyster farm." I say. As I do, I see my brother pull up the motor. Wrapped around it is green netting.
We all look at eachother. And the arging begins. 
"We just have to un-wedge and we'll be right,"
"No, get to oars out." 
"No I'll just untangle the net and well get to motor back up."
"No we can't do that! We're stuck here, on the wood thing. There's no way we can put the motor back in until we get...unstuck." 
The arguing continues from all different directions. The most loud arguer however, is deffinally my brother. 
When he thinks he's got somthing right, there's not way to prove it wrong, his plan is full proof, and it's either his way, or the high way. My mother tyies to talk him into reason. He keeps standing up to check the water, but the whole boat sways to the side. Eventually, we all direct our yelling to him. To get him to sit down, he finally doesn't, but he continues arguing the point. Eventually, after a lot of yelling. My mother calms everyone enough so we can work out what we need to do. 
"We have to un lodge outrselfsand before we can actually jet out if here."
She says.
"Agreed. What we need to do, is get both oars and push our way out," my dad days, both my mother and dad get the oars and start to push in the wooden paling. It's not enough, theres simply to much weight in the boat. 
After a few more minutes if arguing, everyone thinking they have the solution. My mother takes off her socks and shoes. And getting in the water, we all have no idea whats going on. 
But mum jumps on the oyster net, and starts pushing the boat, it's pretty impressive. Finally, were free, and my mum jumps back in the boat, there's all happy slaps on my mums back, until we hit the next bed, we spend the next fifteen minutes arguing about what to do and trying to un lodge us. 
It was rather stressful. Eventually, I just stopped throwing in my suggestions, and remained silent. I looked longingly at the water, just wishing I could jump in and put my head in, and listen the sweet sound of silence. 
Eventually, somehow, we find our way out of the oyster bed. We're free to move anywhere, except the problem is. The beds are all sounded by a plank of wood and the square only has one edge of it, open to go in and out. The problem was getting there. 
Of course, the cruise liner has to pass us on the way, all the oldies are laughing, and taking photos. 
it takes all my might not to flip them the bird. 
We reach one if the sides of the squar, and eventually, we figure. We have to get out. There's no way the boat is going to be able to go over the wooden Planck with all the weight in the boat. So we have to get out. Meanwhile, a boat that i guess is made for mining there way though the oyster mazes, pulls up all the way on the other side of the river, and starts fishing for those oysters. After another fifteen mixtures, my dad calls out to the boat. On the boat, is what looks like a older man, and a old woman. Eventually, they make there way over to us. Turns out the only woman, opon closer inspection, is in fact a Chinese man with a fishing apron on. My mistake. 
"Hey mate, tell me how'd you make into that?" The bloke says with a an auzzie accent. 
"We don't even know mate. Could you help us out?" Peter says. 
"Yeah, just go over to that black pole and you will reach a clear strip of water, you'll be able to get out of it." He says. 
"Yeah. Alright, do you mind toeing us?" Dad say, the man was already speeding off. 
"Nah man. Busy busy busy." And that was it. 
"What a prick." Shona says. 
"SHONA!" We all say at once. 
"What! It's true." We all nod. It is true.
Finally, after A WHOLE HOUR were out if the oyster farm. Longest hour of my life. 
The vibration from the motor, is making me feel I'll. and I want nothing more but to get out bof my wet shoes, and have a hot shower, luckily, the ride back to the resort from town, is about five seconds. 
"How was it guys?" The owner of the boat says, we all look at each other, each of us not wanting to answer. 
"It was certainly unforgettable." I say. 
==CHAPTER TEN: Disappoint==
By the time we got home As soon as we walked in the door, we all sighed, we made it out of the deadly oyster field. I've had enough of thinking. The cabin makes me feel sick. So many body's in the one. Ben tried desperately to get me alone for one moment, but I always found a way to get out of it. I jumped in the shower, and has a extremely hot shower. I'm sick if thinking. I've thought and thought about the problem but, I still haven't found the solution. I'm not even sure if there is one. 
I feel like if I don't get out of here soon. I will explode, I rush into my room, kick everyone out, and get dressed in shorts a singlet and a excesize jacket, I put my hair up in a pony tail, and tie my sneakers on. 
I walk out to the hallway and open the door. Everyone's in the lounging room chatting. 
"I'm going for a run. Don't wait up." Someone yells something, but I shut the door while they do. I can't get down the ramp fast enough. When my sneakers hit the grass. They pummel it, bashing as fast as they can, I raise my hands in an a L shape, and they pump with my legs. I feel the burn if my lungs, and hear my fast panting. I'm not sure what I look like, but I know it feels good. There's no room for thinking out here. All I can think is to keep going. Keep pushing my body. Eventually, my legs give way, and I kneel down. It's been about half an hour. I take a seat on the step and hold my head in my hands. I feel released, and, calm. After another half hour of running, I go back to the cabin, as I'm slowly walking up the ramp, my stomach churns thinking about going back in, I'll be faced with Abby's need for my attention. Declan's cute, and yet disappointed eyes, my parents board gazes, and bens worried face. I go in anyways. I'm still panting, and I open the door, everyone's gathered in the lounge room. 
"She's back," kellie announces. 
"How was your run?" Ben asks looking causal. But everything about his demon screams worried. His leg is bouncing nervously, and he picks at his nails. At the same time his jaw twitches.
"Good. Water." I run to the sink and burry my head in the cool stream. 
Kellie walks towards me, and directs me to a boy sitting at the couch, I didn't even notice him when I came in. 
He stands when I walk towards him. I now have a towel around my neck, and I'm taking sips of water.
"Hello there" I say stretching out my hand, he does his to, and shakes it nervously. 
"Hi, I'm jack," he says with a warm smile. He has dark black hair, and puckered lips. But, his eyes are the most striking, there big and brown. 
"Hi jack, I'm Skye." I say slouching and letting my hips fall to the side. 
"I've heard a lot about you." I look towards the others. 
"You have?" I say. 
"Yes, they have been telling me all about you." Dad doesn't pay much attention to the boy, or me really. He just stress at the cricket on tv. 
"Oh that's..great. Will you excuse me, I'm all sweaty. I'm just gunna get changed. Shona, will you come with me please?" I say, I catch a glimpse of the anger in bens eyes. 
Shona nods, and follows me to my room.
"Ok. What the hell?" I say with my hands on my hips. 
"Isn't he cute?" She says smiling. 
"He's fine. What is he doing here?" 
"We'll. if you must know. Faith and I met him at the pool. And we told him all about you. He seemed pretty genuine. So we invited him for dinner." 
"SHONA! Are you kidding me? For one...I'm not allowed to date, and for second...WHAT THE HELL." 
"
Ok first of all. Chill. Second if all, keep your voice down, he will be able to hear you. And third, mum and dad dont have to know, he's just the lovely kid we invited for dinner." She says. "Ok get dressed. And, by the way, nice the way you came in, all hot and sweaty. Very... Bay watch." She winks at me and walks out. I sigh, this is going to be a long night. 
I get dressed in a White skirt, and a light blue top. When I come out, dinner is already on the way, everyone but the kids are in the kitchen. I'm forced to sit on the couch, next to jack. 
"So Skye. Tell me. How uncomfortable are you about this? On a scale of 1-10." He says. 
"Hmm, imma say about a 7ish. You?" I say. 
"I'm actually leaning towards eight," he smiles. I look at him for a second, and we both laugh. Ben sits across the room seething with...whatever it is he seethes with. 
"What's up with Mr. Jealously over there?" He asks slightly looking at Ben. 
"Oh, he's just really protective. Don't mind him" I smile. 
"Oh. You two are..." He trails off. 
"Oh no. We're just friends." 
"We'll for just friends hes awfully in love with you." 
Ok I admit. Jack is pretty charming.
"No he's not, he's just cares about his friends." I brush off. 
"...friends he's in love with." Jack makes me feel very comfortable. The way we speak to each other, is like we've known each other for years. I'm much more at ease now. I punch him in the shoulder and he laughs. 
"But seriously though. He has it for you." I ignore the statement, and look down. Blushing a bit. 
"And you do to don't you?" He says examine my expression.
"None of your bees wax." I joke. 
"We'll, looks like your sisters have a different idea. You should have heard them while you were out for the run. Going on and on." He says swing his head back. 
"Oh really? Sorry to disappoint you." 
"No not at all. Your far from a disappointment." He smiles. I actually feel kinda bad for him, he likes me. And the only person I have it for is Ben. And he knows it. 
"We'll, how about you get me a drink, might as well please these giggling fools." I laugh pointing at faith and Shona who are sitting in the corner looking at us. 
"What's your poison?" He asks while standing. 
"Mmm just a water thanks." I reply. 
"Now Skye, that's a disappointment." He laughs. As soon as jack walks away, my phone in my pocket buzzes. 
[whats going on? Did he hurt you?] the message is from Ben, I smile and type back:
[no Ben, relax, we're just talking. ] 
[...fine] 
This is the first time, apart from when I told him what people had done to me when I was 8 and 13 that I had seen him truly furious. 
Jack comes back with the water, and we continue talking. Eventually dinner is announced as ready, and we sit to dinner. Of course, jack has to take a seat next to me. The whole time, Ben says no word. The night rushes on. A 9:30 jack decides to go. 
"Mums expecting me home soon. Thank you all so much for having me, I had such a great time." 
"I'll walk you out." I say, Shona winks at me as I head out the door, this is the first time jack and I have been alone to actually talk without being scrutinised, we both drop the fake smiles. 
"I have to say. Tonight went much better then I thought it would." He says at the end of the ramp. 
"Yeah, me to. Sorry about the instant hatred from Ben. He's usually not like that. He's much more fun, I promise." 
"Yeah, what's you guys deal?" 
"Yeah, we're going out, but, our he rents don't know." 
"Ahh, that explains it. Well, not that it means much coming from the stranger you met a few hours ago but. He really loves you." 
"
Yeah, I. Know he does." I smile. He reads my expression. 
"You don't?" He asks. 
"No no, it's not that. I just, I don't want to disappoint him." I say looking down. 
"Hey. Like I said, your far from a disappointment. Any guy would be extremely lucky to have you. And he knows it to. That's probably why he felt so threatened tonight, your far to much of a treasure to loose." His words hit me hard. I smile, and hug him, it feels like I've known him for years. He face burns real hot. 
"I'm just sorry I got here to late." He smiles. What a nice guy, 
"Thank you, for..everything, acting, for, putting up with Ben. Just, thank you." 
"No problem Skye. It was worth the food. I'll see you round." He smiles and walks into the night. 
==CHAPTER ELEVEN: Three Promises==
I spend the rest of the night avoiding Ben. I know he will want to talk to me about jack and why I'm so morbid. But, I just don't feel like talking. So instead, I go into my sisters room, and we play monopoly while talking about jack. 
I admit, the guy was nice, and very charming. But he was a bit too smooth for my tastes. 
"So, will you see him again?" Faith asks. 
"Probably not. We might see each other Round. But, I wouldn't specially go looking for his company." I hear a sigh from both the girls. 
We spent most of the night, talking, and laughing. Its nice. Finally at about midnight, Im kicked out of the room. I go to my bedroom door, but I cant will myself to go in. I neednto be sure there were all sleeping before I go in, especially Ben. So, instead, I do' the unthinkable. 
I clean. 
First loungroom, then the bathrooms and I was halfway though the kitchen, before I hear footsteps in the hall. I dont panic because I know that I im allowed to be up this late on holidays. I do however have a mini heart attack when Ben emerges from the hallway. 
"Skye." He says in shock. "What are you doing up?" He says between yawns. 
"Could say the same thing for you." I retort. This is my way, when there's a question with difficult answer, I turn it back on them. .
"I was coming to get a drink, what's your excuse?" He says walking to the sink. 
"I'm cleaning, here don't worry you sit down, I'll get it." He nods and I pull out the glass to fill with water while he sits at the bench. 
"So, you gunna stop avoiding me, and finally say what's on your mind?" Bens less then tactful about the subject. 
"I spoke with your mum." I say while givving him the glass. He stiffens somewhat and takes a sip. 
"About?" He says.
"Your dad," he's entire body stops. It like time freezes for a moment. He puts the glass down, and balls his fist. Not like anger, but more because he needs somthing to be in control of. I know because I have done it many times in the past. 
"What did she say?" He says taking a deep breath and speaking though gritted teeth.
"She just told me some things I needed to know. Mostly though. She told me about, how you were so hurt that he kept his cancer from you." I say. He now won't look me in the eye, he just stares at the glass of water with a clenched jaw. 
"She told me that, if I want to be with you. I have to keep no secrets from you. That there's no lies between us. Nothing is held or kept from you. At least. That's what she was 
implying. "
"So she knows up about us then?" He says.
"I thinks she figures. But, she didnt say anything...but that's what I was thinking about all this time. And, there's something I have to tell you. Rather, warn you." I say. He looks at me raises and eye brow. 
"Ben. This is going to sound really self centred, and arrogant and selfish. But, I'm going to tell you anyways. I need you to be there. When something happens to me, or...with me. My first response, no matter how unhealthy it us. Is to retreat. From people, from life. And that's what I mean, if we're going to do this. I need you to be there, because I will fall. It will happen, and if you can't tell me, for 100% curtain, that you will be there. We have to end this now. Because you know how hard I fall when I loose somthing I love. And I get hurt like that agian." I conclude. He sits for a moment and stares at the floor. My heart pounds. It's a lot to ask, and it's probably unfair of me to ask for it. But, honesty is everything he's asking of me, so I might as well give it. It's the longest two minutes of my life waiting for an answer. 
"Alright. I can do that. But, you have to promise me somthing." He says. My heart fills with relief, but also a dread. What will he ask of me?
"Alright fair enough. What is it?" I ask. He stands from his seat, and walks over to me so he's standing very close. 
"You have to promise me three things. One. That no matter how hard you fall, or how hopeless you feel. No matter how much damaged is caused. That you will try. At least try. To get back up." It's a huge ask. It's been difficult to fight for the mental stability I have now, and I'm not even close to stable. I've always found comfort in knowing, that if I choose. I can end my life at anytime. I've even engulfed I. That comfort a few weeks ago. He's now asking me to let go of that security. I feel panic in my bones. My heart pounds. 
I'll have no blanket- wait. That's not true. Ben has promised to me that he will be there for me. That, he will be my blanket. 
"Ok. I'll try. I promise. What's the second." I ask. 
"That even if its not your first reaction. That when somehthing happens, weather someone does somthing to you, or you do something to yourself. Or even if you just have a bad day. You will come to me. You won't reteat back into your shell. You won't go and hide from the world. No matter how hard it is. You will come to me." He says with a affirmative voice, one I've never heard. The question fills me with emotions. It means I'll never have the privicy that I'm so used to cushioning me. 
"Ok." I say softly. I have a tear falling from my eye, but Ben catches it before it drips.
"I'll always be here to wipe your tears." He says. And pulls me for a long hug. 
"What's the last one?" I say my voice muffled from his shoulder. 
"Never loose that gorgeous smile." 
==CHAPTER TWELVE: Both==
It's about 3:30am By the time we both get off the couch and put our cloths back on. 
when we do, we both head back to bed. Both, extremely tired by this point. 
(Wink. Wink. You like what I did there? Huh? Huh?...smooth Skye. Real smooth. Also, I know what Nikkis thinking right now. (Lovlely) HA IM SO RIGHT. Anyways. Ive leaved alot of these story's out of the main story. because, i don't think you wanna know that much anyways, so. for everyone reading, just know. you have saved yourself from some extreme innocent stealing situations. Ok back to the story.)
We sneak into the room, and lay on the separate beds. Ben holds my hand, and I squeeze his back. 
In the morning, I come out of the room, this time, I'm actually awake before Ben. Before anyone. 
I walk into the lounge room, and look at the mess Ben an I made last night, I speedily clean it up, and turn on the morning news. I flick though the depressing feed, not really paying much attention. My legs bounce in anticipation of Ben waking up.
Last nights discussion means that Ben and I...are now a serious couple. Though those promises. We have set our life together. 
Everyone wakes up before Ben. FINALLY the sun has come out! It's been overcast, and it even rained a bit yesterday. And finally the sun has decided to show us it's warm gaze. 
My dad decides we should take a walk on the beach. They try to wake Ben, but, he's far to tired. I can't IMAGINE why. (Wink)
I refuse to go also, everyone else decides to go. Once there gone, I take a shower, do my make-up, and get dressed. As I'm putting my top on, Ben wakes up. I'm getting changed in the same room he slept in. 
"Morning delight?" He says though a yawn. 
"How about no." I laugh. I put on my top, and kiss him in the fore head. "I'm making breakfast, want anything special?" I ask. 
"Just you." He grabs my hips and forces me on the the bed, it bounces and I giggle. He holds me in his arms for a few moments. And I lay on his chest. 
"You smell." I say eventually. 
"I can't imagine why." He laughs. 
"We'll go take a bloody shower," I say with a smirk. Eventually he lets me get up, and I start cooking. I hear him in the shower as I'm soaking white bread in French toast mixture. 
As I'm almost done cooking, Ben gets out if the shower wearing nothing. Not even a towel. 
"Get dressed you idiot they will be back soon. They will see you, and I don't think we will be able to explain that one." I say while setting the table. 
"Hmm I so pose your right, any special requests?" He says standing over his suitcase. 
"Just clothing would be nice." I say. He laughs and shuts the door. Just as he does, I hear the family climbing up the ramp. There all pretty shocked as I serve the food. They were schocked this morning when the place was clean to. 
I guess I'm not much of a homec. 
Once everyone finishes eating, including Ben who comes out his hair fresh, and wearing jeans and a black tee shirt. Rather dashing really. 
I clean up the table, and go to my room to get dressed in my bikini. I know since it's finally. sunny, people will be at the pool to. I get my shorts on, and a singlet. I'm okay with showing my stitches to my family, and the macdonalds. But not to strangers. I still have a limp with 19 stitches on my thigh, and the 34 stitches on my stomach. Ben Knocks and I open the door. No one is with him. I guess there still in the lougeroom. I walk to the mirror as he gets dressed into his swimmers. He knows exactly what I'm thinking, and walks over to me. He wraps him arms around my waist, and rests his chin on my shoulder. I hold my hands on his, and he lifts up my shirt somewhat staring at my stitches. 
"Don't there ugly." I say pulling it back down. 
I can see us both in the mirror, he standing up behind me, his entire body enveloping mine. 
"No there not." He says. He kisses my neck and i sigh hanging my head. 
"Skye there a signal of what you have overcome. Think about it. You were in the hospital a bweek ago. Bearly able to walk. And now your here, with me. Your still here. You should be proud." I have my eyes closed, as he looks at my stomach in the mirror. He traces the stitches with his fingers and I feel a tear fall from my eyes, he flips me around and looks at me dead in the eyes. 
"I'm proud of you. That's enough." He says, "that's enough for you to be proud of." 
I nod. I know what he means. He hugs me, being carful not to squeeze to hard. My leg doesn't hurt anymore. Plus on the Rare occasion it aches, I just take pain killers. And it goes away quickly. It's mainly just a limp. I hate it, but. For some reason Ben doesn't notice it. Bearly at least. At least it doesn't make me feel bad about it. 
We all head to the pool. 
==CHAPTER THIRTEEN: Memories in the Sand==
This time it was the entire family coming with us. Once we got to the pool, there was about 30 people. It did it matter really, it was a massive pool. It was bearly crowded. I put my stuff down in one of the plastic lounge chairs. And and thanked myself that I bring my book with me. Everyone in the family, but both the mums, and I jump in the pool. It takes ben a few seconds to work out that Im not coming with him. The thought of undressing in front of all these people,and showing them my bruised and scared body makes me dizzy. Ben swims to the edge and leans in his strong and..oh so muscly arms on the concrete. 
"You coming?" He says. Surly he knows the answer. 
"Nah, I'm just gunna chill here in the sun." I say. 
"Fully clothed?" He says, he knows me too well. He knows when I tan, I tan topless. 
"We'll, I just wanted to read a bit." He can see right though my excuses.
"Don't lie to me Skye." He says with a smirk in his face, does he think this is funny?
"It's not funny Ben, just leave me alone." I say, the smirk fades from his face, and in one swift move, he lifts himself from the pool. His entire body drips to the floor, and the sun gleams on his shinny body. 
he comes up to me, and stands tall over me while I lay in the chair. He's dripping all over me, but I really don't care. 
"Come on Skye. Come on in. No ones even gunna notice." He says. 
"Yes they will." I say. 
"Are you really that into yourself?" The question catches me by surprise, and I look at him 
in disbelief. 
"Skye, look at all these people. Do you really think they give a stuff what you look like? There in there worlds, playing with each other. Having fun. Like you should be." He holds out his hand. And I reluctantly take it. I putmy book down, and I stand with his hands in mine. He nods at me. Both out mums are watching us. I let go if his hands, and slightly pull up my top. I get to the part of my stomach with the stitches. I'm about the revel them, when my entire heart sinks. Suddenly I feel like I can't breathe. My entire body shakes, and I feel like my heart is going to jump out of my chest. I look at Ben with panic in my eyes, I violently shake my head. I can't do this. He takes both my arms and sits me down. Both the mums have rushed to my side. I'm hypernpventalting. I can't breathe, I can't even remember how to do it.
"Skye, listen to me. It's okay, I, not going to push you into it. It's okay, you don't have to do it, just breathe okay? Just breathe." Ben says to me in a smooth monotone voice. By now the entire pool has turned there heads to me, I'm creating quiet a scene. Exactly what I didn't want to do. 
I feel the tears flood my face, and I can't catch my breathe. My head spins about seventy miles and hour. 
"Okay, I'm going to take her for a walk." Ben says affirmatively. He stands me up, and loops my arm around his shoulders and helps me walk. I'm still spluttering with tears but the time we leave the pool. 
I wrap my shivering hands around the freezing ice water. Ben sits rubbing my back, as I sip the water, my mouth is already wet from crying. And the water tastes salty. 
"Want anymore?" He asks.
"No I'm right," I croak.
"I'm sorry." Ben says with his head hanging. The confession surprises me. 
"What why? I was the one who flipped out! All you did was encourage me to do something. Something that, if I could have done, might have been good for me." I say. He pinches the bridge between his nose. He honestly looks like he's going to cry at any moment.
"I shouldn't have pushed you. You wouldn't have had a anxiety attack if I hand-" his voice catches and his entire body convulses into tears. I drop the cup of water and throw my body into his back. There's nothing I can do but hold him. He crys. With me. For me. 
"Hey hey, it's okay. I'm okay now. Look." I grab his face and hold it to mine, which is now directly in front if his. His eyes are red from crying, and his cheeks spotty with a cherrie coulor. 
He takes his quivering hand and touches my face. I let him feel me, let him see that I'm okay. 
"See look at me. I'm fine, I'm right here." I say. His body jolts forward and his lips desperately attach to mine, he holds his mouth to mine for a few rough seconds, and eventually lets go resting his fore head to mine, he's breathing hard. As am I. 
"Lets go for a walk huh?" I say. He took me back to the cabin, where he got me the cup of water. 
"Yeah okay." He sniffles and looks down. I rearly see him cry. Actually, I never have. I've seen him with tears in his eyes, but never seen him actually sobbing.
never the way he was just then. It somehow made me feel closer to him. Like we shared something no one can take away. We walk with his hand wrapped around my shoulder to the beach. When we get there, to the clearing, I sit on the sand and Ben sits behind me and spreads his legs open. I sit willingly in them, and we both stare at the shore while he gently rubs my arms. 
He plays with my hair. I'm not exactly sure what he's doing. But I know it feels nice. Very nice. He kisses my neck occasionally, I guess just to know I'm there. It feels good. Very good. I lean back into him. And he folds over a bit more so his face is shielding mine from the sun. 
"Tell me something I don't know," he says. I think back, the only the memory I have had pulsing though my mind is one of the sand. 
"Before my attempt. I used to come to the beach, and I would write in the sand, what has happened to me. What...what he had done to me." As I tell the story, I write the words. 
 
"I was raped" in the sand. Ben has a deep consternation on his face. 
"And each time I did, I told myself that I would have the courage to show some one what I had written. That they would see it. Each time I told myself that. And each time, I kicked sand over the words before I left. I never had the courage." I finish, brushing the words away. He looked at me with an overwhelming sadness, and pity on his face. I'm not sure what my aim was to tell that story. But, I felt I had to. So finally, someone will see the words in the sand. He knows what happened to me, of course. But I felt I still needed to do it. For the old Skye at least.
"Stay here okay. I'll be just over there." He says pointing to some of the wet sand. I'm not sure why he wants to go over there, but, I guess. He just needs to be alone. I nod, and he lets go of me. It's one of the truly most horribly depressing moments of my life. Not having his strong arms in mine. I shake feeling as best I can by lying in the hot sand, and staring at the coulds. Eventually, I think I fall asleep. Because, the next thing I know, it's late afternoon, and the suns not admitting it's raise. I sit up, expecting Ben to be next to me. But I see, he's over at the wet sand. Crouched down, concentrating on something. 
"Ben!" I yell, he turns around and waves. Smiling. 
"Come over!" He yells back. I stand up, and walk over to him. As I do, I see the image approaching. 
It's and extremely detailed picture of myself, and Ben kissing in the sand. You can even see the chicken pox scar I have from when I was four. It's extremely detailed, and very talented. Our heads are evenly sitting inside a love heart. And under the heart, in a flowly pattern. Is the words. 
"
True love is the new secret." 
I feel a tear forming in my eyes. Bens an extremely good artist. He always has been, but he has never shown anyone his work before. Well, except me of course. 
"Oh my. Ben. This is. Incredible. How long did is take you! Oh my god. This is. Like. PRO. Are you serious? You did this. Oh my Ben." I can bearly get the words out fast enough. I run towards him, and jump on him. It seems even his strong firm, built body can't handle an extremely excited girlfriend. We both topple to the ground. I think I seriously hurt some of my stitches. But, I don't even care. 
"I thought you should have a new memory."he says while I'm laying on top of him. 
I'm completely speechless, so instead I just kiss him a million times. 
This is my Ben. The amazing wonderful Ben. The one I want to spend the rest of my life with. 
==CHAPTER FOURTEEN: The Plan==
"I wouldn't really, she's a complete master when it comes to board games. Trust me. It's a bad idea." I sit back on the couch ignoring the conversation. Bens obviously trying to talk some sense into them. Board games is defiantly my strong point. 
"Listen to the boy, he speaks truth." I say. The macdonalds apparently have some crazy idea they they could possibly beat me. ME! At monopoly. 
"We'll, how about we see then? Iron or hat?" Peter says. I sit forward, and take the battleship. 
"Now. Who's role?" Ben sighs and slumps in the chair. 
"You guys are so screwed." He mumbles. 
After an hour game of monopoly, and of course me winning. The loosing team, of course the macdonlads, have to wash the dishes. 
" NO ONE DARE CHALLENGE ME!" I say pretending to kiss my none existent muscles. Three weeks of sitting in a hospital bed has made me extremely unfit. 
"Yeah. Says the girl who has a panic attack in front of forty people because she has to wear a bikini." Jesse mumbles. The comment hits me to the core. I don't know why, my Brother has said about a trillion unkind things to me that have gone right over my head. 
But this one hits me hard. Ben notices it straight away, and shoots Jesse a death stare. I shake it off, and pretend everything's okay. 
" so I hoped you have all learned your lesson. No one messes with the sky-sta." I say heading to my room. I sit in the bed and sigh. It's the second last day here. I've been in complete bliss here. I wish it remained. 
Abby comes bursting though the door. 
"Skye Skye! Look!" She hands me a little suitcase about the size of a paper towel dispenser. In it, is about 30 different shades of nail polish. 
"WOW!"..no I don't have to fake excitement here. I'm actually pretty psyched. 
"Mum and daddy bought it for me! Can you paint my nails?" She says. I nod and we pick out the coulor. About half way though, Ben casually walks in and pretends to be tapping on his iPad. I get lost I my little world. It actually takes a lot more talent and skill then it looks to do this. You have to have the right amount of polish in your brush, at the right pace, and you have to be careful not to knock the edges of the nail. It's requires a lot of concentration. The problem is, my medication the doctor gave me, is designed to keep me in a zombie state. To keep me from thinking. I sort of "self prescribed." The dosage however. I hate that feeling, of not living. I want to be able to experience life. Not mozzy my way though it. So everyday, I take less and less. But sometimes it's still real hard to conserntate. Like now. Eventually however I figure it out. She runs outside show her family. And I collapse on the bed. 
"Headache?" Ben says. 
"No. I just, I'm zonked." I say. 
"Alright I'll get you your meds." He says. He leaves the room, and as he does, I setup my covers so I can sleep in them. It's only nine thirty. But I'm completely smashed. Turns out an anxiety attack can make you rather sleepy. 
"Here you go." I hadn't even noticed him come into the room. He holds two pills and a glass of water. I swallow them down quickly. I lay my head on the pillow. 
"Tell me something I don't know." I say. 
"Did you know. That I have planed our whole lives together?" He says. I do actually know this. But I love hearing about it. And he knows it. 
"Really?" I say. Getting a bit more comfortable. He sits down on his bed thats next to mine and begins the story. 
"Yes well. We're going to have 3 kids. A big boy, and two twin girls. So the boy can look out for the twins of course. Then, we will live In a small house, so we can always be close. You will raise the kids With That vegan crap you eat. And I will occasionally take them out to eat meat without you knowing. You will be a stay at home mom. And I will miss you all day at work, until I come home and we have wonderful passionate sex." He explains. 
"Really? And what will the kids names be?" I ask. 
"We'll. the boy will be named William. Because I know you love it. The two girls will be called savannah and Nikki. Because I know that's what you would call a girl if you had one. Nikki. And I love the name savannah."
He continues his wild story. As he does, i imagine his world. I actually find myself drifting to sleep. Excited. Excited that that life. Could possibly be waiting for me. 
==CHAPTER FIFTEEN: Flashback==
In the morning, there's truly no excitement. And it's incredible. I get up at about ten o'clock. And everyone's already awake, my parents have made pancakes. I of course don't eat any of them. But I enjoy the morning sitting in bed sipping coffee the that lovely Ben made me. 
There could be nothing more perfect. Until. 
I'm flip the edge of the brown page, ready to turn the next page of my book. When a feel the cold silver violently push itself on my neck. With such force, I swear I there was blood seeping from it. I can feel his hands grope my chest. He cold unnerving hands. This can't be right. This is over now. This happened only once, it can't be happing again. I grit my teeth and scream as loud as I can. I thrash about trying to get his unfeeling hands off me. I'm in a unending world of sheer terror before I feel another pair of hands grab my shoulders and shake me. And then another from behind. The world before me starts to fade. And even his dark gloomy eyes are replaced with the bottom of the bunk above me. I'm back. In my cabin. Around me is Ben, with both his hands in my shoulders. My fathers hands behind me, and my mother off at the door with both my sisters in tears. 
I look at Ben with confused eyes, he can see the terror and confusion that lies beneath them. 
"Flashback." He says breathlessly. I burst into tears. There's nothing I can do at that point. But weep. 
I'll never recover from the pain that man caused me. Every night I relive it. 
Every night he comes back to cause me just a little bit more pain. 
I'll never forget that cool blade across my throat. His disgusting hands searching my body. 
He's splitting, and horrifying eyes will hunt me until the day I die. 
Faith hands me my anxiety pills that I'm ment to take to calm me down. I look at the pills in hesitation. 
"It will make you feel better." She says. I nod, and swallow them. 
She sits at the end if my bed. I've been shaky and uncitain of myself since the episode. I keep expecting him to jump out if the shadows and attack me. 
Kellie thought it might be a good idea to have someone with me at all times. Faith wanted to take the first shift. 
"..faith. What did. What did I look like?" I say without looking at her in the eye, she puts the book down that she's reading and stares at me a second, and sighs. 
"We'll. it wasn't pretty. You looked absolutly terrified. You were thrashing around, screaming. Yelling at...someone to get off you. But, no one was there."
She says while laying on her stomach. 
"Oh okay." My whole family knows what has happend to me. But, it's not exactly talked about much. Ben and I talk about it alot. But. My family sorta steers clear of it. Leaves it to my therapist. 
"You wanna talk about it?" She says. 
"Nah, I'd rather not." I reply. 
"Okay," there's and awkward silence between us. Neither if us know what to say. 
"Poker?" She eventually says. I give a huge grin. 
Twenty three games later, and nineteen wins from me. Faith is givving me thirty dollars, that I won. And Ben takes over the shift. By now its about six o'clock. 
"Ugh. What a sucky last day?" I say looking out the window at the mouldy rain. 
"Yeah. Guess so." He says. "Wonder what we will go back to." He says, 
"I'll go back to writing sev stories." 
"I'll go back to playing football. "
"I'll go back to being connected to my guitar every three seconds," 
"And you will go back to fighting for your life." He says looking me dead in the eye, eye contact by anyone used to make me nervous. Mainly because somehow, there eyes reminded me of the man that raped me. 
Maybe the shape. The coulor. Maybe the length of the eye lashes. There was always something. But, bens eyes don't make me feel like that. It's soothing to have him looking at you in the eyes, a kind of deep honesty is shared between us. 
"Yeah, I guess so." I say. 
"I wish you were better, I wish you were happy." He says. 
"So do I." I reply. 
"I wish, that man. I wish he hadn't had done that to you. I could jus-" I put my hand in his clenched fist. He's very mad. He's face is red, and both his knuckles have turned white. 
"We can't change what happend." I say. He sighs, and lets the coulor return to his hands. 
he gazes at the guitar across the room. Ben knows how to play guitar and he has a gourous voice, but. The music isn't in him. Never have I seen him connect to music. At least, not like I do. I see it in his art work. That connects, its him, more the anything. 
He walks over to the guitar, and brings it back to the bed. There he tunes it. 
I'm not actually sure what he's planning on doing. 
"I learnt this song while you were in hospital. I never got the courage to sing it to you. But, I think nows a good time." He says, courage? What? He's like. The most courageous person I know. 
He beings the song. 
After the first four courds. I know the sing. It's James morrisions "I won't let you go".
"When it's black. Take a little time to hold yourself." 
He has a deep conserntation on his face. 
"Take a little time to feel around. Before its gone." 
"You won't let go. But you still keep on falling down. Remember how you saved me now. from all of my wrongs."
"and if this love will feel it. And if this life will see it. Ain't no time to be alone alone. But, I won't let you go." He"s smooth voice, inclines into my heart. 
"Say those words. Say those words like there's nothing else. Close your eyes and you might believe, that there is someway out, open up. Open up your heart to me now. Let all come pouring out, there's nothing I can't take. "
"And if this love will feel it. And if this life will see it. Ain't no time to be alone alone. I won't let you go. And if your sky is falling. Just take my hand and hold it. You don't have to be alone." I feel my face flooding with tears, the honesty in his voice, is unmistakeable. 
"Yeah I won't let you go. And if you feel the fading of the light, and your to weak to carry on the fight. And all your friends that you count on, have disappeared. I'll be here not gone. Forever. Holding on." The version of this song he sings, is much slower. It makes the lyrics more meaningful. My face is wet. But my eyes can't close to blink them away, there compelty glued to Ben 
"if this love is feeling, and if the sky is falling, just take my hand and hold it. I won't let you go. I won't, Skye, know, I'll never let you go." 
He's entire song slows down. And he says the final words. 
"I won't let you go." 
I'm frozen as he lifts his head. And puts the guitar down. He holds my hands, which are completely lifeless. I can do nothing but stare. He wipes my tears, and finally he says. 
"We'll?" 
"I think we're gunna have to end this." I say breathlessly. I see a slight panic in his eyes. 
"Your far to good for me. I don't deserve you." I say with a smile. 
"We'll. you'll catch up...eventually." He smiles. I jump into his arms.
And for that one second, everything that has ever happend to me. Is gone. Doesn't exist. There only me. Ben. And that beautiful song. 
He won't let me go. 
I'll never be alone. 
==CHAPTER SIXTEEN: Last Night==
After bens serenade session. I feel well enough to go into the lounge room. My face is still wet, but I'm grinning from ear to ear. When I come out, there are a few concerned faces. But they see my smile, and immediately relax. We watch two movies 
"The kings speech." And "Fifty first dates." 
When we finish the last one. We're all rather board it being the last night, an idea pops into my head. 
"So. I'm thinking. Pool." Everyone's faces light up. And it's agreed, were going for a swim. 
It takes the family about thirty minutes to get dressed, and there stuff together. 
finally, we all head to the pool. It's about eight thirty. The pool is more then I expected. There are multicoloured lights gleaming in the pool. It sets the mood for tonight, it's glamorous, and completely stunning. 
I can bearly wait, I run in as fast as I can, and take my top and leave my shorts on. I remember the last second that I have shoes on. I take them off, and jump unit the pool. The water is exquisite. 
it's warm, but still refreshing. It makes me want to laugh, and run, and jump, and cry all at the same time. I love that. 
the entire family jumps in. It's incridble. We all laugh and joke about. Everyone looks amazing with the technicolor gleaming off there face, but no one more then Ben. He's without a doubt the most gourous thing I've ever laid my eyes on. 
Everyone, one by one, starts to leave the pool. Each one getting out very fast, and not letting the cool air touch there body's before they rush back to the cabin. I bearly notice, because I'm lost in the weightless feeling of the water, it surrounds me effortlessly. When I come up from the water, I immediately miss it. And have to dive back down. Eventually I'm down to just Ben and I in the pool. We laugh, and joke around. Innocently, like we used to do when we were just friends. 
"Alright, guys imma head back to the cabin. You guys can stay here, not to long though. Only about an hour. Okay?" Kellie says. She's the last one to get out, and is waiting at the gate for my reply. 
"Okay. No problem. Don't use up all the hot water." I say smiling. 
"ha, I'll do my best, dont get into to much mischief you to. I know you crazy kids," she winks at me and leaves. Yeah, she diffinally knows were together. But, I don't even care. There's nothing more perfect then this moment. 
I swim over to Ben and wrap my legs around his waiste. He loops his arms around my shoulders so were looking Eachother dead in the eye.
"You know miss Skye, I've noticed somthing about you." He says. 
"My exquisite beauty?" I joke, he smiles. 
"Yes, but I noticed that a longtime ago don't you worry. What i was going to say was. You have to get lost in everything you do. Like in the water just then. You could tell, you were lost in your own world. Doing your own thing. You didn't even have to think about what to do, your body just did it. Its like when your singing, or playing, or writing. Your in your own world. Now, the only reason I can come up with, is because you have to put your whole heart into things. But, it's odd because, you don't put the same trust in people. You don't give your heart to people. Hell it took me three years. But it's like, with your music, or with the water, or your words. It's like your heart is immediately committed to it." He explains. It's an interesting theory. It's probably correct. 
"Maybe that's because I know those things won't hurt me. And people always do." I say plainly. He smiles. 
"We'll there's one thing I know for sure." He says. 
"What's that dear Ben?" I say. 
"You never look more stunning while you retreat into your world."he says. 
I kiss him passionately. And he does the same back to me. 
For that moment, everything makes sense, my crazy head. My mental ways. All makes sense. I'm crazy because I'm not kissing Ben twenty four seven. If I stayed this way forever, I would be happy. 
==CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: The End== 
HEY GUYS so. This has been more like a diary to me, then an actual story. Mainly because a story has a plot line. And usually has a situation the Charters have to overcome. This has no such thing. It was mainly a journal that I posted on the Internet. So. I hope you guys like it anyways. It's mostly romantic dribble. So, you most likely won't. Anyways, if your reading this now, it means you have read the rest of it. So if you have, I thank you. Sorry if this mushy crap makes you want to hurl. But, I mean. It's my story. Okay, we'll, thank you so much for reading. And, here's the last chapter. Hope you guys enjoy it. BYE
Im still awake at 2am. I can't switch my brain off. Which sucks, because I need is in the morning. The rules state that we have to be out of the cabin, and park. At by ten am. 
Which means, because I was to lazy to do it a few hours ago. I have to wake up at eight am to pack. Which, also sucks. Sure, I have no troubble sleeping any of the other days when I can wake up when ever the bloody hell I feel like it. But NOOO, I have to not sleep, when I really need it. 
Becide me, Ben lies awake. I tried to cokas him into going to sleep. But he's still worried about me after my episode today. Usually when something that major happens, I'm pretty mental. So, I understand. But, he wants to be awake to make sure I'm okay. I really am, I just can't bloody well sleep. Ben goes out to get me more medication. 
I've been resisting them all night, because I hate that feeling. Of loosing control of my own thoughts. Of my body, of a drug taking over my senses. I hate that. But, eventually, I'm to tired to resist them anymore. Ben comes in with a glass of water and two white pills. They should have kicked in within ten minutes. After twenty minutes. Still no affect. Ben even makes me show him under the tongue to make sure Im not smuggling them. I'm really not, I just can't sleep. It's frustrating more then it is distressing. I know how badly my body and brain needs sleep. Which makes my mind more stoubourn. A hour later, Ben hands me another does of the pills. 
I'm actually starting to get worried. i have my pills that I take at nine, and there ment to help with sleeping, they already do. Then, I took those other two at two o'clock. But still no affect, and now, Im taking a new set at three am
 Still, with no sleep. There has to be something wrong if I can't get to sle- whoa. A wave if tiredness hits me instantly. I'm still standing when it does, and Ben notices my demeanour I stumble back, and he catches me carefully. 
I don't even remember getting to my bed in the morning when I wake. But, when I do, it's all hands on deck. Everyone's madly rushing around, trying to pack up,and get ready to go.
I do my part and pack my bag. But, I'm bearly keeping my eyelids up. After an hour of packing up, we're finally ready to leave. We hop in the car and go to the front office to return to keys, and pay. When we do, Ben and I are left in the car. 
"We'll, that has to be the best holiday I've ever been on." He says looking over at me. 
"Same here." I say.
"No way, you have been to Fiji and New Zealand. " he replies.
"Yes but neither of them had you." 
THE END
THANKS FOR READING!
Category:Bios