The Big SBFW Movie/Transcript

[<insert opening credits>. The movie slowly opens up to SpongeBoy narrating]
SpongeBoy: *narrating* Ahhh, SBFW. A place where you can make crappy, pornographic, SpongeBob  fanfictions
SpongeBoy: *narrating* I remember when I got promoted to rollback. *pause.* It was only yesterday, after all. Today I'm going to try my first day at SBFW's staff building. *sighs* I'm probably getting a tour or some crap... Anyway, lets begin, we've not got all day!
A Big SBFW Movie!
Produced by Dimmwitt Movies
[The movie fully opens up to the staff building, some admins (Polar, Matchy) are seen typing on their keyboards]
Spongeboy: *Is seen walking in* Hi?
Polar: Oh damn! I forgot the tour was today!!! *runs into a door labelled “Admin room” very quickly*
SpongeBoy: Uh- *cringes*
Match: Don't mind them.. *continues to type something*
Spongeboy: What am I supposed to do?
Matchy: Go up there *points to a room called “Rollback room”*
Spongeboy: Sure thing... *walks up mini stairs and arrives at the room and peeks in* It's empty...
Matchy (offscreen): So?
SpongeBoy: Where are the rollbacks?!
Matchy (offscreen) I've not seen Granite in there in ages.. And CartoonGuy is in the con-mod room
SpongeBoy: o *pause. Looks in the room again* Well, I'll just have to brave being alone *heads into the room*
Narrator: 1 minute later
SpongeBoy: [shown in the rollback room sweating and freaking out] *shouting* I'M ALONE, AAHHA. ALONE. ALONE. ALONE. ALONE-.
[Cuts to FireMatch looking disturbed as hell. Cut back]
Spongeboy: *breathing heavily* It's okay... Maybe I can try writing the new Welcome To New Kelp SpongeBoy! episode.. *starts to open their computer and types a script looking thing on Foogle Docs*
[Five minutes later card. We then hear clutter down the stairs, and Polar]
Polar (offscreen): *Shouting* I'M BACK!!
Spongeboy: *gulps* Here I go *is shown walking out the room, down the stairs, and stands in front of Polar] I-I’m here.
Polar: Okay. Ready when you are
Spongeboy: Okay, I'm ready, lets go *starts to walk and then jolts to a Stop* Polar, you coming?
Polar: No fucking way.
Spongeboy: What do you me- *pause* Not that kind of “come”. Now let's get on with the tour?
Polar: I see... *catches up to SpongeBoy*
[Polar and Spongeboy head off to a random hallway, and Polar starts describing it]
Polar: Here is the hallway! This is where lazy fucks hang out, and slack off all the staff rooms are!
Spongeboy:  But my rollback room was-
Polar: *interrupting * Oh! Yeah, that room is also in the hallway. The door you took was an alternative one!
Spongeboy: o *pause* Hey, what about the retired staff?
Polar: Them? They go in the retired staff room, or they can go back to the dump that we call the normal user building...
[Pause]
Spongeboy: *it seems their eyes lock on a button* Oh, look! A button *she moves her hand closer* What if I press it?
Polar: Don't!!!
Spongeboy: What if I do?
Polar: What if you don't?!
Spongeboy: What if I do?
Polar: What if you don't!?!
[This continues for half an hour]
Spongeboy: I'm fed up of this back-and-forward shit! *presses the button*
Polar: *eyes widen. Noticeable angry tone* Did you just press that button, you fricking moron!
Spongeboy: Well yes but actually yes
Polar: That doesn't make sense, you fucking smart as-
(Angel music plays as a masked user approaches, flying down from above)
Spongeboy: Uhhhhhhh-
???: *Angelic voice* Hello, simpletons
Polar: Hey! I'm no simpleton!
???: (same voice)*sighs* Hello, users. (Pause. Record stopping sound) Why the hell did you summon me you mothertrucking bitches?!!!!
Spongeboy: Excuse me, but who are you?
???: I'm FANDOM, smartie!
Spongeboy: Then why do you sound like a drunk guy?
Polar: *whispering to Spongeboy* This is FANDOM you're speaking to, fool!
FANDOM: Okay, you smart asses, get ready for an butt whoopin' *rolls back their sleeves and growls*
Polar: One word: run
Spongeboy: Hurry up then!
(They both starts running as “FANDOM” chases after them. The 2 race down the hallway, as FANDOM is charging after them, breaking everything. The chase goes on for a while, until Spongeboy and Polar hit a dead end. They then have no choice but to crouch to the floor]
Spongeboy: Fuck! A dead end...
Polar: *sighs* It was nice knowing you... I guess
FANDOM(offscreen): Alright bubs, your time is up.. (FANDOM then finally finds them, approaches them, and bares his teeth at them.) This. Is. It. (He covers his teeth, swings back his fist then.. stops)
Spongeboy: Are-are you...?
FANDOM: Y’know what? I can close this wiki! So let me say this, okay? You bitches have 4 days to redeem yourselves. All of the SBFW staff, norms too, have to redeem this wiki. By sitting at your desks, and make the best spin-off ever!
Polar: Really?! That's it!?
Spongeboy: What they said...
FANDOM: *starts to sweat* W-well, uhh, it's a fanon, so I just thought, err....
Spongeboy: *sighs* A spin-off is fine...
FANDOM: *jumps in “victory”* Yeah!!! WoooooooH!! *stops, and goes serious * 4 days or I'm shutting you sitting ducks down. [Walks off-screen and grumbles]
Polar: Really?! “a spin-off is fine” Who agreed to tha-
Spongeboy: *sighs* I regret saying it, but still, do you want SBFW closed.. *groans* again?
Polar: Not really no.
Spongeboy: Then let's go!!
[The two run to the main point of the staff building. When it cuts to the main area, Spongeboy is seen standing on a random desk, with many users watching]
Spongeboy: *marches back and forth on top of the desk* We've all been called here for a reason!
Arre: [shows them trapped in a cage, sitting down] I don't want to be here
Spongeboy: Too bad!
Arre: Don't you sass me!
Spongeboy: *face palms. Pause* As you can not-see this dump might get shut down!
[A whole load of gasps emerge from the crowd]
CrazySponge: (appears out of nowhere) go read mEmE wOrLD: teh movai: the squeakquel – another meme world movie
Spongeboy: Shut up Crazy! Our wiki might get closed and you're- you're.... ADVERTISING
CrazySponge: ok dictator
Spongeboy: *face palms 2.0. Pause*  Anyone else gonna say anything?
Purple: *sticks his hand up*
Spongeboy: *sighs* This isn't school, what is it?
Ace: It's SBFW, silly!
Spongeboy: No! Purple, what is it?
Purple: I have to admit, this sounds like a load of baloney, I mean why would they close this wiki over an accidental summoning!?
Spongeboy: It's true!, ask Polar!
[Camera pans over to Polar]
Polar: *Shrugs* [Pans back]
Spongeboy: *groans* Let's just brainstorm ideas...
Maximian: Why don't we make a spin-off about me! I'm suuuuper popular!
Spongeboy: I can deny this *pause* Anyone else?
Lock: Snail Sex: The Series
Spongeboy: No way
Polar: The Stop Jacking Off In Class Show
Spongeboy: No! *faces the fourth wall* If someone who hates that joke reads this, you're going to hate this movie, cause there's more jokes about it further ahead.... *turns back. Sighs* We need to do this guys! Or we'll close!
Ace: Hoopla’s Fantastic Bleach
CrazySponge: that sounds-
Spongeboy: It will get cancelled if you're in charge. *sighs* C’mon any others?!
Narrator: 5 hours later...
Forest: A Patrick Fails prequel!
Spongeboy: I've been counting, and damn, this is my 500th no today!
Crazy: a box productions series: the mega, ultra, hyper, omega, fantastic, supreme, overly kool, sbfw show
Spongeboy: Ahh, today I say my 1st......... YES
[Everyone cheers {except Ace}]
Ace: Why Crazy’s idea?
???: *off-screen* CrazySponge × Spongeboy!
Spongeboy: No u
Crazy: EWWW
Spongeboy: *sighs* Let's just start making episode 1...
[A nice montage showing different users, sketching, storyboarding, even writing, and more. Then cut to Crazy and Spongeboy drawing something for the show]
Spongeboy: Crazy, hand me the pencil
Crazy: why
Spongeboy: *sarcastically* I'm going to play baseball with it
Crazy: oh! before you do be careful. I once did that, the pencil snapped in half and hit my pe-
Spongeboy: GIVE ME THE PENCIL YOU SCUMMY SLUT! 
Crazy: *squeals* okay! *hands them the pencil*
[Cuts to another few users, writing]
CartoonGuy: *while typing on his computer* I'm putting myself in this!
SpongeBot: No one likes, or wants you, in this show
CartoonGuy: Stop talking to yourself Bot!
[Bot shakes it off and walks away. It then shows a computer and a few other users]
Pluto: *smiling* I animated the first episode! 
Spongeboy: Ok! Show me then!
Pluto: No can do
Spongeboy: Why not?!
Pluto: I'm lying calm down, calm down
[Pluto goes onto a video, and it shows an animation on the screen, it quickly cuts to  different users'  faces, watching it. It then cuts to the crew sitting in a room]
Spongeboy: WE are going to submit that to FANDOM!
(Everyone cheers)
[The cheering fades as FANDOM and Spongeboy are shown together sitting with the same laptop as before. FANDOM has a weird expression on his face]
FANDOM: (The laptop screen goes off) What the heck was that!?
Spongeboy: The first episode of *inhales*  A Box Productions Series: The Mega,  Ultra, Hyper, Omega, Fantastic, Supreme, Overly Kool,  SBFW Show. *puffs*
FANDOM: It was fucking horrible then!
Spongeboy: *coughs* What
Polar: *runs onscreen* Did he like it!?
Spongeboy : no
Polar: *Her eyes widen* All that work-
Spongeboy: *gulps*
Polar: FRICKING GONE
[Spongeboy hides behind a desk and FANDOM and Polar are off-screen, seemingly tearing each other apart]
Spongeboy: Oh god
Polar: (off screen) Yeah! That's what you freaking get!
Spongeboy:  (Polar is saying stuff like “ahahha”, “wooh yeah baby” and more in the background) Why does she sound like she's fucking him? *shrugs* Never mind, I'll just go write a new episode *walks off screen*
[The movie cuts to a peaceful afternoon, and text is shown saying “a few days later”. The scene shows staff at their desks]
Polar: *Talks in a very posh voice* Wonderful day we're having, isn't it Spongeboy?
[The camera now shows Spongeboy, whose clothes are in shreds and their face has many cuts.]
(Polar nudges them)
Polar: Dude, you OK?
Spongeboy: Why did you do that
Polar: *laughs nervously* What?
Spongeboy:  You threw me off the fucking building
Polar: Only because FANDOM said, “Throw someone off the roof, and I'll keep your wiki” .
Spongeboy: Why me?
[Flashes back to Spongeboy (as a normal user) annoying Polar]
Spongeboy: Hey Polar
Polar: what
SpongeBoy: You suck
Polar: *growls*
[Present]
Polar: Reasons
[The camera zooms out as they get back to typing, the movie goes into the credits]
(The credits play Ocean Man, because Ocean Man)
(Cast plays)
(Order of appearance)
Spongeboy0009 as Spongeboy 
PolarTem as Polar 
FireMatch as Matchy 
Zoltan as The Narrator 
Peter Griffin's Dad as FANDOM 
Arre as themselves 
CrazySponge as ... well CrazySponge 
Purple133 as himself 
XxSpongiiXx as Ace 
Maximian as Themself 
AllisonLoaded as Lock 
1033 Forest as themself 
Cartoon Guy as himself 
SpongeBot as themselves 
Cobian&Co as Pluto
Prim as themselves 
[The long credits finally finish, as a post credit scene opens up, as a few users are on a stage]
(A boppy beat is heard)
Polar: *singing* Hey kids! Today we're going to sing about.....
Ace: *singing* Jacking-off
Polar: *whispering* Not your part, Ace!
Ace: Oh sorry, my lady
Prim: (off-screen) Get on with it!
Polar: *singing*School
Is a place to feel cool
And happy
But sometimes people do something, and it's really crappy!
They jack-off in class
They dangle their cock during math!
Moan in the middle of French
And at lunch they get-all-over the bench!
So one thing I need to say to ya kids
Stop fapping in class, you worthless bins!
Ace: *singing* I know it may be hard to not (fap)
But stopping is the only chance to save the social life you got
So stop jacking off in class 
Stop whipping it out!
You hairy  pig snout!
Both: Stop Jacking off in class!!!
[This fades, and the movie finally ends] 
Category:Spongeboy0009
Category: 2021
Category: 2021 Transcripts
Category:Movies
Category:2021 Movies
Category:Transcripts
Category:Transcripts
Category:2020s