Eight Misbehavin'/Quotes

:Flanders: They can be a real handful... of joy.
:Apu: Shut up.
:Flanders: They'll fill your lives with...
:Apu: Just shut up.
:Flanders: [quickly] Can't put a price on a miracle!
:Apu: I can't believe you don't shut up!
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:Allen Wrench: You put it together yourself! All you need is me, Alan Wrench!
:Homer: He's named after what he is.
:Bart: Cool costume!
:Allen Wrench: [Robotic voice] It's not a costume. They found me inside a meteor!
:Marge: Excuse me where are your hamper lids?
:Allen Wrench: [Normal voice] Hamper lids? Third floor. [Robotic, to Bart] Help! I need tungsten to live! Tungsten!
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:Apu: Well if the police won't help us I guess we'll just have to take the law into our own hands.
:Chief Wiggum: Yeah, yeah a lot of people are doing that these days.
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:Homer: Don't worry, I've brought chloroform.
:[Homer sticks "chloroform" on the guard woman]
:Apu: You idiot! Those are colourforms!
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:Manjula: (while pregnant) Apu, do you still find me attractive?
:Apu: Of course I do, sweetheart. You are beautiful and silky and manageable.
:Manjula: You are reading that off a conditioner bottle!
:Apu: That's true, but you still have a...
:(Manjula's water breaks)
:Manjula: Ooooooh... Whaaaaah... my water broke.
:Apu: We better get you to the hospital. Clean up in Aisle 3!
:Gil: Oh boy! Gil is making his way up the big leagues (slips on wet floor) Ow, my back!
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:Homer: Man, the last nine months sure were crazy.
:Bart: I'll say. I learned the true meaning of Columbus Day.
:Marge: I enjoyed a brief but memorable stint as Sideshow Marge.
:Lisa: I became the most popular girl in school, but blew it by being conceited.
:Bart: And then I learned the true meaning of winter.
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:Homer: Kids are the best, Apu. You can teach them to hate the things you hate. And they practically raise themselves, what with the Internet and all.
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:[When Marge and Lisa are looking at pencil holders]
:Lisa: [picks up a pencil holder] Ooh, I want to get the Krünk.
:Marge: Mmmm, you don't want something that overshadows the pencils. [holds up another pencil holder] How about this Pöpli?
:Lisa: Mom, no! Everyone at school picks on the Pöpli kids..even I do. [under her breath] I just hate them so much.
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:[At the Kwik-E-Mart, Apu is sitting in the ice cream cooler when Homer arrives]
:Homer: Hey, Apu! Sitting in the ice cream cooler, eh?
:Apu: By chilling my loins, I increase the chances of impregnating my wife.
:Homer: Who-o-a! Too much information! Thanks for the mental picture. Why don't you tell us what you really think?
:Apu: Just stop spouting those hackneyed quips.
:Homer: Could you be any more ... hello? [laughs] Look, just give me some ice cream. [Apu pulls out out an ice cream container] Um, how about one not touching your ass? [Apu gives him another one]
:Apu: [his pager goes off] Oh! Manjula has begun to ovulate. [gets up and leaves quickly]
:Homer: Ew, thanks for sharing. [Apu drives home and his car passes the Kwik-E-Mart] [yells] More than I wanted to know!
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:Dr. Hibbert: Did anyone else slip this woman fertility drugs? [Homer, Marge, and Bart raise their hands]
:Homer: [holds up a pill] Mine tasted like strawberries. [eats it] Mmmm, ovulicious.
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:Kent Brockman: How do you feel about this avalanche of free merchandise?
:Manjula: Oh, the companies are so generous. Except the Q-Tip people. They only gave us three crates. They can rot in hell.
:Apu: But the good folks at Sony. [kisses remote] Their giant TV will really help us love our babies.
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:Manjula: Apu, it's 4:00 a.m. You're late for work.
:Apu: [wakes up] Oh, I just had the most beautiful dream where I died.
:Manjula: Oh, no, you don't. Not 'till they're out of college.
:Apu: Listen, I'll die when I want to.
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:Marge: Apu told me all eight babies have colic, although he thinks one or two might just be going along with the crowd.
:Homer: 8 babies ... I'm sterile, right, baby doll?
:Marge: Yes, dear. From the nuclear plant.
:Homer: Beautiful.
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:Apu: Homer, we have tried everything. Oysters, gravity boots, Sanjay's bed, every possible position.
:Homer: Really? On top and underneath?
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:[Apu and Manjula read from a script written by Homer designed to help them conceive. The script is noticeably littered with inconsistencies.]
:Apu: Gee, Betsy, it's such a nice night. Why don't we go all the way?
:Manjula: But Greg, my dad will kill me! And you have that scholarship to Ivy League State.
:Apu: Listen up baby, tomorrow I'm shipping off to Vietnam. I... [breaks character] I thought I was going to Ivy League State?
:Homer: My mistake, stay in the moment.
:Manjula: Just promise not to forget me on your dinosaur bone digging-up trip. [proceeds to make love with Apu]
:Homer: And that's my cue to exit.
es:Eight Misbehavin'/Frases