Jack Packard

Jack Packard was an ongoing featured guest star of several RLM videos. He has been known to make both poo-poos and pee-pees, and is completely hairless with the exception of his eyebrows. It is unclear what is the cause of this unfortunate hair loss, although them speculate that it may be because of the chemotherapy he used to remove the tumor in his crocodile brain (like lion brain). Irregardless, he does not seem to be bothered by his baldness, except that he is incredibly ashamed of his lack of pubic hair. In order to compensate for this problem, he sought out the help of William Shatner to provide him with a merkin of the highest quality available today. Reports vary on the exact cost of the item, but merkins of a similar type are often valued at anywhere from ten to twelve thousand dollars.