Paper Mario: The Astral Prism/Quotes

This is a compilation of quotes in Paper Mario: The Astral Prism, listed by character.
== Ashtaroth ==
* "You couldn't keep us sealed away forever!"
* "Hey! You wanna fight?! I'll pound you into the dirt!"
* "I'm on it! By the time I'm through with this Mario guy, his clothes won't be the only thing painted red!"
* "Hyuh huh huh huh! Nice try, punks!"
* "The name's Ashtaroth! I'm a loyal servant of the Empress, ready to crush anyone who tries to oppose her!"
* "How about I show you punks what you want: an all-expenses-paid vacation to dreamland!"
== Asmodea ==
* "After all these years, we return at last."
* "Just tell her, Ashtaroth. Do I seriously have to do everything around here?"
* "Well, you can take him next. I'm sure Ashtaroth will manage to screw something up."
* "I suppose it falls to me next . . . naturally."
* "Worry not, Empress. Unlike these bumbling buffoons, I have a plan in mind."
== Azazel ==
* "Eeheeheehee! The time has finally come!"
* "Aw, man! I was hoping I'd get to meet this guy. I'd have given him an explosive surprise!"
* "You got it, Empress! I've got a scheme so twisted it'll make you dizzy!"
* "Just you wait! I'll knock your figurative socks off!"
* "Azazel's the name, bombs are my game! Eeheeheehee!"
== Beatrice ==
* "My name? Oh, silly me! I've forgotten to even introduce myself!"
* "I'm Beatrice, a member of the Honey Queen's royal guard. It's a pleasure to meet you!"
* "It's my duty to serve my queen and my people. After rescuing us from those awful Piders, I'd say you fall in the latter category."
* "Excellent! I'll do my utmost not to disappoint you."
* "Well, I slept . . . last night? At some point? And I ate . . . a meal?"
== Bowser ==
* "GWAHAHAHA! Mind if I drop in?!"
* "That's right! Bowser's back, baby!"
* "Huh? Mario?! Oh, of course you're here to ruin the fun! Seriously, can't I get one good plan in without you jumping in to stop it?"
* "Guh . . . Stupid Mario . . . Stupid festival . . . Stupid kingdom . . ."
* "Kammy! There you are, you old hag!"
* "Geez, how many crazy magical artifacts does that guy need? You'd think he'd let me get ahold of a set for once!"
* "Well, there's a bit of a problem with that: I CAN'T FIT! This bod's got too much awesome for one measly pipe!"
* "Wait, not that fast! Kammy, you old hag! Junior's still repairing the Clown Car!"
* "Who's the old wise guy around here? Towns like these always have an old wise guy!"
* "Wait, those jerks kidnapped Princess Peach? Why didn't anyone tell me?! Damsel-snatching is my job!"
== Goomblake ==
* "Your highness! Goomblake here, from the Crystopolis Times. Could I take you aside for a quick interview?"
* "'Bowser Attacks the Astral Festival, Clashes with Visting Mario!'"
* "Say, would you mind if I covered this fight live? The people watching at home might need me to explain what's going on!"
* "'Mario Saves the Astral Festival!' Man, this is gonna be the scoop of the century!"
* "Don't worry, I can handle myself in a scrap! Besides, I can feel that this is gonna be my big break!"
* "Ah, what a lovely place! I've been all over the kingdom, but I've never seen anywhere quite as peaceful as Joybloom Hills."
== Kammy Koopa ==
* "I'd heard tales of a powerful magical artifact in the Crystal Kingdom, and that prism is just bursting with energy!"
* "Nyeah heh heh heh! Brilliant as always, Your Maliciousness!"
* "Your fire breath is as scorching as ever, King Bowser."
* "Stop right there, you pathetic fools!"
* "This isn't over! It's time I used my most powerful spell of all!"
* "RETREAT! KING BOWSER, HELP MEEEEE!"
== Koopelle ==
* "Omigosh, dad! Don't tell me you don't recognize that guy in red!"
* "I'm not a kid anymore, dad. You were like this when I told you I wanted to become a singer in Crystopolis, too."
* "I want my own things out of life, and right now, I want to help everyone back home."
* "Omigosh, thanks! I'll do my best!"
* "Whoa! Princess Peach was kidnapped? . . . You know, I probably should have figured."
* "Crystopolis is, like, totally huge! I don't know where to go first!"
== Lilunia ==
* "Yes . . . the time to bring the kingdom, and then the world, to its knees."
* "No! It can't be! A Prism Shard?!"
* "Very well, then . . . Though my powers may be lessened, it's only a minor setback. Come, my minions!"
* "My name does not matter. For the sake of expediency, however, you may call me the Empress."
* "Ingrates! I told you I'd be busy speaking with the princess!"
* "So, our dear Princess Peach knows this Mario, does she? How very interesting . . ."
* "SILENCE! I should have expected this from you, Ashtaroth, you incompetent buffoon!"
* "Oh, for the love of–WHY ARE THERE RATS?!"
== Luigi ==
* "You're pretty excited about this trip, eh, Peach? How about you, bro?"
* "I'm glad you decided to come along, bro. This is gonna be great!"
* "Oh, yeah! My bro's definitely the one for the job."
* "I'll stick to the city and gather intel for you. Take care, bro!"
== Princess Peach ==
* "Oh, stop being such a worrywart!"
* "The Crystal Kingdom is perfectly safe, and I've never had the chance to visit, let alone during the Astral Festival!"
* "King Ruby! Queen Sapphire! I haven't seen you since the last Inter-Kingdom Council!"
* "That prism is precious to the people of this kingdom! I won't let you take it!"
* "I remember! The festival! And Bowser! And . . . that thing! Those horrible monsters that kidnapped me!"
* "Well, no use laying around. Perhaps I'll find an escape route for once! Wouldn't that be something . . ."
* "Calm down, Peach. Mario's completely fine. He's survived worse troubles than this, and that Ashtaroth fellow didn't even look all that bad!"
* "Oh! Um . . . squeak, squeak, squeak?"
* "At least you're okay, Mario . . . Let's hope you stay that way."