SCP-2345-j

Item #: SCP-2345-J
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2345-J is to be kept underwater in the Pacific Ocean, until further notice lazy bitches. Any instances of SCP-2345-J are to be taken back to the Pacific Ocean, unless tests need to be conducted ON WHAT!. Any subjects who were subjected to SCP-2345-Jthat have directly or indirectly touchedbeen touched,will die[DATA EXPUNGED].
Description: SCP-2345-J is a FUCKING BITCH THAT RUINED MY MARRIAGE
metamorphic rock with unnatural source of power LET,ME,KILL,IT. This "power" is seen to be very hazardous to married men and single women WHY, they don't bother to check why. While the size of this rock is small enough, to use as a paperweight, for unknown reasons, do non-linear algebra equations. As a result, many scientists were attracted to this nerds. One test was conducted to ensure th-(DATA CORRUPTED!SWITCHING…)
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<CONECTION ESTABLISHED!>
<DATA RETRIEVED>
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20% OFF! GET YOUR UNDERWEAR FOR A MERE $9.28!
50% OFF! AMAZING DEAL ON AMAZING PANTIES…$7.57!
45% VAT ADDED TO STRAP-ONS, $67.99!
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