Home/Transcript

==Scene 1==
(A VHS tape begins playing, showing JCJenson with icons for cleaning, cooperate, and robot safety.)
JCJenson (In SPAAAAACEE!!!!)
Rebuild Together BetterTM
FBI WARNING:Federal law provides severe civil and criminal penalties for the unauthorized reproduction, distribution, or exhibition of copyrighted motion pictures, video tapes, or video discs.Criminal copyright infringement is investigated by the FBI and may constitute a felony with a maximum penalty of up to five years in prison and/or a $250,000 fine.
JCJenson: AUTOMATED SERVICES TECHNICIAN TRAININGWD Disassembly - (1A) Overview:"Zombie Drones!!!!"
CLIENT REASON FOR WD UNIT DISASSEMBLY AND DISPOSAL
53% Unit Damage
27% Upgrading Model 
11% Terminating Operation(s)
7% Competitor Products
2% Core Failsafe Trip
1% Other
Narrator: Upgrading models. Cutting maintenance costs.
WD DISASSEMBLY PROCESS TWO STEP OVERVIEW
STEP 1: Software Cleanup
Ensure Marked WD Unit Matches P/N, S/N (1A) → MARKED FOR DISASSEMBLY 
Narrator: There are many reasons the clients may wish to disassemble a drone individual or series after a period of use.
Upload wdOS_606(This is Fun for Them) (1B)
STEP 2: Hardware CleanupHuman Inspection (2A): Affirm Core Disconnect
Process Drone (1) Core (1)Through disassembly unit (2R)
Human Inspection (2B):Affirm fun
Narrator: (The tape and audio begin glitching out.) Following these two steps is key to avoiding—
(The tape has now completely glitched out and is replaced by static. Until...)
ZOMBIE DRONES!!!!!
(The tape then returns to normal. For the most part.)
WD DISASSEMBLY PROCESS COMPLICATIONS AND FINES
FINE 9C: "Zombie Drones"
-> Core is not properly disconnected-> Hardware is not physically destroyed-> wdOS_606 is interrupted/rejected immediately (1A) or up to five (5) years later
Narrator: Incompletely disassembled drones may occasionally reboot from software death alone. More than undead federal fine hazards, these corrupted AI carry an increased risk of future error—
CORE TERMINATION REJECTION CAUS CHECKLIST - "T.O.F."
aiCore WD1001 -0.01% self-reboot rate (3020)
Technician Error (Repeat A1-B2)
Faulty OS String (Check Indicator)
Failsafe Wear (Inspect Pins)
(The tape glitches out once more as we zoom out from a television set sitting in a dump full of dead worker drones. A bird flies around looking for something to snack on. Underground, Cyn awakens.)
==Scene 2==
(At the Elliott Manor, N is sitting on the floor in a library, reading a book called "101 Dog Breeds".)
N: Commonly kept, this breed is known for its friendly, intelligent temperament and soft golden coat! (Chuckles) Golden Retrievers are also— (He comes across a drawing that was placed in the book.) Us as lizards. J drew herself.
(He tosses the drawing off to the side and continues reading.)
N: (clears throat) ...are also known for having gentle mouths. Aww...! That's why they're good with kids!
(He hears a stomping noise. Books start falling off the shelves as he sees that someone is attempting to enter the library via a trapdoor... But he thinks nothing of it, flashes a peace sign, and walks out of the library.)
==Scene 3==
(An insect crawls over a teacup and begins to drink the oil inside.)
Cyn: Stab.
(The insect gets stabbed by Cyn. N enters.)
Cyn: You seem upset, big brother N. Perhaps you'd like to attend the gala with me? Light sip. (She tries to sip her teacup, but misses, and the oil spills onto the floor.)
N: Ah... Not sure we're invited, little buddy. Why not just hang with me?
Cyn: (Climbs up on the seat) Climbing. Criss-cross applesauce. Am I not wanted, N?
N: (Sighs) Dude... You know it's Tessa's folks.
(Red liquid, likely blood, suddenly drips from the ceiling and onto N's platter. He wipes it off, revealing a message written on the ceiling.)
BAƧMƎИT NOW!!!STOᑫ IGИORINວ MƎ!!!!
(N throws the platter to the opposite wall, trying to ignore the paranormal sign.)
N: (Sighs) Don't give me those eyes.
(Cyn's visor displays a puppy picture.)
Cyn: Giggle. I am so naughty. The flesh demands invitation.
N: Ah, we'll ask Tessa, OK? If not... Movie night! (strikes a pose)
Cyn: Sheepish nod.
==Scene 4==
(N and Cyn enter the room where the gala is taking place.)
Cyn: (Walking behind N) Shuffle. Shuffle. Shuffle. Shuffle.
James: Western Villa style?! Were you programmed by beasts?! (He tosses a fork into a Worker Drone's eye, killing it as it causes a spurt oil to come out of it's visor.)
(Tessa and J are off to the side at a small round table, Tessa is pacing nervously)
Tessa: There's humans coming! I've only ever yakked to robots, J! Quick! Pretend to be a ripping royal stud!
(J starts pretending to act all royal and proper lady-like.)
Tessa: On ya, girl.
(They have a toast. Tessa starts rubbing her arm like it hurts.)
Tessa: I'm right, J. (She sees that N has arrived.) N! (squeals and waves enthusiastically)
(She runs up, grabs him by his cheeks, and swings him around.)
N: Hi, Tessa.
(N looks over. In the window, another message is being written.)
WHEN U ABOUT2 FRIKKEN DIE,SPEAK ALOUD:ID: DarkXWolf17
Tessa: Oh, who'd you bring with— (She sees Cyn and narrows her eyes.) you...
Cyn: Seems J forgot to let me out of my basement time-out again.
J: (Annoyed) Yet, here you are.
Cyn: Annoyed expression.
N: You guys are... locking her up?
Tessa: Oh... N—
Louisa: (Walks over) Tessa James Elliott! We will not entertain your dumpster pets!
Tessa: Y-Y-Y-Yes, mother. Sorry, mother.
Louisa: (Sees Cyn) Oh! Christ Almighty! I said, "This one, out of my sight!" Still can't follow simple orders.
Tessa: NO, NO! Please, I—
Louisa: Swamp. Dumping your broken drones, clogging our library tomorrow too. Don't test me.
(As she walks away. Tessa tries to argue back, but isn't willing to anger her mother any further.)
Cyn: They are not broken. We can no longer be thrown out.
Louisa: Did that little Anti-Christ—
N: (N stands infront of Cyn.) I-I-I told her to say that! And brought her here. I-I just...hate orders...? (He looks nervous.) And your fan's dumb...? (He gives a peace sign and an awkward, sheepish grin.)
==Scene 5 ==
(N has been tied to a tree and is being pecked by crows, as punishment for insulting Louisa.)
N: NO! AAAH! STOP!
(What sounds like torture is, in reality, N being playfully pecked and tickled in the head by the crows.)
N: (Laughing) Stop!
(A crow hands N a stick, crowing expectantly.)
N: Go get it, goobers!
(He throws the stick in the air but a flying crow snatches it. All the crows on the ground turn to face N with sinister, glowing, green eyes. He glances over at another drone who suffered his own fate at the talons of the crows. He gives a sheepish smile and thumbs up, and the crows begin to attack him.)
N: (Being viciously pecked) Ronald, we were buddies! (pause)...DarkXWolf17...?
(All the crows fly away as one crow makes its loud entrance, performing several sick moves. It twitches and falls on the ground as an orange glow appears in its eye. The crow gets back up and turns its head dramatically to reveal a glowing purple AbsoluteSolver symbol in its eye. A purple user interface window appears above the crow's head:)
User ID: DarkXWolf17
(It begins speaking.)
DarkxWolf17: Ugh, made the tag when I was eight, shut up.
==Scene 6==
(Back at the manor, Tessa is in her room with Cyn and J. All of them are chain up by their legs.)
(Tessa is pulling at her chains, trying to loosen them but to no avail.)
Tessa: J, industrial machinery, chuck us a hand!
(J is sitting, swaying on a rocking horse,)
J: Sorry, boss. Corporate's spoken.
Tessa: Cyn! If that little butler dies for your sake, I swear!
Cyn: (Playing with toys) Mm. I have backups.
(Out of options, Tessa gets down to try and reattempts to break the chains herself when Cyn suddenly appears next to her in an Eldritch form.)
Eldritch Cyn: You will not have to discard your pets, and I will not discard you. Best stay away from the gala, though. (Eldritch Cyn strokes Tessa's face with one of its tentacles). You seem squeamish. (She leaves.)
(A shocked Tessa and J turn to look at each other and an insect, that now has it’s main body replaced with a doll, crawls out of sight.)
== Scene 7==
(Back outside.)
N: So, these are memories, and future me is dead at a sleepover?
DarkxWolf17: (Picking up a stone) Not a sleepover. You passed out, 'cause some internal program is trying to delete these memories.
N: 'Cause...'Cause of you? 'Cause you're doing that? Ow! (Birdzi drops the stone on his head which falls on the chains around his leg which is keeping him tied to the tree.)
DarkxWolf17: I'm helping, you cute, weird, weird butler. We find out what happened to you here, restore the memory files, and save you from being digitally lobotomized. (Birdzi sits on top of Ns's head and points with her wing.) Library basement, giddy up.
N: 'Kay. (He heads off for the library.) You kind of seem like an evil ghost witch, though. (Birdzi pecks his eye.) AH!
DarkxWolf17: I AM a ghost witch! And I'm tall. (She laughs evilly.) DAD! GET OUT OF MY ROOM! (Her voice becomes glitchy and she falls over.)
(Back in the present time. Khan has walked into Uzi's room, disturbing her hacking.)
Uzi: Important hacking going on!
Khan: Okay, okay. You've just never had friends over befo—
Uzi: Not a sleepover!
Keybug: IT'S LIFE OR DEATH, DAD! >:( (Uzi closes the door with her AbsoluteSolver.)
(Back in N’s memories, Birdzi and N have reached the library.)
DarkxWolf17: Sorry. Where were we- oh...
(V's unconscious body stands before them, V's visor flashing "ERROR: 606".)
DarkxWolf17: Okay, N, I can pull you out an—
N: (Interjecting) Now! Now, please!
DarkxWolf17: —ytime. But, you'll never get these memories back, dude.
(They press forward slowly.)
N: They're that important?
DarkxWolf17: To you! And, like... me.
N: Why? Who are you?
DarkxWolf17: We just... hang out. Shut up. Repression door.
(V's visor still flashes the "ERROR: 606". N hesitates, then relents and pushes V to the side, out of the way. He removes the rug she was standing on, revealing that she was standing on the basement door. Which turns out to be require a key.)
DarkxWolf17: The key...
N: Ugh, J has it.
(They suddenly hear a giggling noise. They slowly turn to see that V is now grinning and has a claw-like hand. Birdzi lays an egg in terror.)
==Scene 8==
(Back in Tessa's room, J is trying to break the chains with her mouth.)
Tessa: (Overdramatic) It wants paid time off. To attend UUUUNION NEGOTIATIOOOONS!
J: (Finally at her limit) THIS IS AN UNRELATED LAYOFF! 
(In her rage, J breaks the chains and starts punching it angrily on the floor. She spits on it and then looks over at Tessa, who gives a thumbs up.)
(Back at the gala hall, Tessa and J sneak around the second floor.)
Tessa: How do you reckon we murder us a robo-child, J?
(She bumps into a suit of armor. J grabs a revolver while Tessa grabs a sword.)
Tessa and J: How 'bout this? (They look at each other and decide to swap their weapons.)
N: (Whispering) Psst! Tessa!
(They look to see that N and Birdzi have appeared, crouching. Suddenly, V's glasses drop from above. They slowly look up to see V in a Solver-Eldritch form crawling on the ceiling. The three, and Birdzi, huddle as a group.)
N: We need the basement key. This bird's from the future.
DarkxWolf17: (Flies over to J and snatches the key.) I'd kill you. (She snickers mischievously and flies back to N.)
Tessa: Cyn's gonna massacre the gala!
N: Who? Our Cyn? Nah, she's cool. (Tessa and J look at each other in disbelief.)
(Without warning, V swoops down and splits the group up; Tessa and J on one side of the corridor and N and Birdzi on the other side. V tries to swipe at Tessa with her claw but J reflects V with her sword.)
J: Do your basement thing. We got the coma patient you creeped on.
N: Not creepy. Sweet!
(V appears next to N and tries to swipe him with her claw, making him drop the key. V lunges at the key but Tessa picks it up and throws it back to N. V grabs and throws J's sword backwards at N, but J kicks him out of the way and takes her sword back. She rushes towards V, and the two engage in combat. Meanwhile, Lord Frumptlebucket is watching from below.)
Lord Frumptlebucket: Crikey, what aboundin' humphterfruffle!
Katie: Why are you talking like that?
==Scene 9==
(N and Uzi make their way back through the library. They hurry to the basement trapdoor and unlock it when...)
Eldritch Cyn: (Pops up) Jump scare. Grab. (She snatches Uzi and throws her to the side.)
N: DARKXWOLF17! NOO-O-O-O-OOO!
(Eldritch Cyn grabs N by his feet and slowly pulls N towards the basement but suddenly malfunctions. Uzi has hacked her way into Eldritch Cyn's body.)
Uzi: Oh, we're in! (She spots V behind N.) ...And J's useless. Surprise.
(She drags N into the basement and locks the door to prevent V from entering.)
N: Is V... okay? Like, in the future?
Uzi: Unfortunately. Now, let's see what that little yellow creep was up— Oh!
(They come across a collection of dismembered Worker Drone corpses.)
Uzi: So... That's a pretty... metal origin story. 
N: (Terrified) Not dealing with this great, to be immediately honest...! (Takes a moment's repression.) Okay, it's gone.
Uzi: Alright, let's get out of here.
(A rumbling occurs. Back in the real world...)
Khan: Hey, buddy, you invite Doll to this—
(He suddenly gets grabbed and thrown out as Doll teleports her way into Uzi's room.)
(Back in N’s memories...)
N: Ghost buddy? You okay...? 
(N comes near to the Eldritch and tries to prod it when the Solver returns it's control.)
Eldritch Cyn: Better than ever, "buddy". (She grabs N and tosses him into a chair.) Let's reset these memories one more time.
(N looks in fear at the tools that the Solver has.)
==Scene 10==
(The gala is about to commence in the hall.)
James: (Taps his wine glass) Welcome, all! The Elliotts are known for many things. Class, tenacity, currently being alive—
(Cyn teleports atop a large globe at the back of the hall.)
Cyn: Well-timed. Giggle. (She reveals herself.)
(The hall turns silent when Tessa and J barge in through the doors.)
Tessa: EVERYONE, STAND BACK! This is a citizen's murder! (Tessa aims her revolver at Cyn.)
(James and Louisa gasp.)
Louisa: (Appalled) That dress!
James: You hold that gun less cool this instant, missy!
(Cyn uses her AbsoluteSolver to shove Louisa and James to the side.)
Cyn: Tessa, remember, you didn't have to—
(Tessa fires a bullet at her, but Cyn avoids it with her AbsoluteSolver and instead the bullet breaks a window.)
Cyn: ...You didn't have—
(Tessa throws the revolver at her, to no avail. She then starts throwing glass cups and a whole tray, not getting any different results. Cyn flashes an unamused expression, then turns off the lights in the room and takes control of all the Worker Drones , including J.)
Eldritch Cyn: You didn't have to see this.
(Eldritch Cyn crushes the globe she was previously holding.)
==Scene 11==
(Back down in the basement, N hears the screams of the guests as they are being massacred. Eldritch Cyn is trying to pick up some tools to wipe N's memories.)
Eldritch Cyn: Son of a- Come on... Solver of the Absolute Fabric, get a grip. (She gives up.) Tantrum. (She throws the table to the side.) ...Brain blast. (She turns to the basement trapdoor.) Oh, V. Could use some help in here.
(Back in the real world, Uzi and Doll are fighting over the green keybug.)
Doll: Ты даже не знаешь что эта штука делает. (You don't even know what that thing does.)
Uzi: You wanting it tells me you shouldn't have it!
Doll: Ты такая мелочная. (You are so petty.)
Uzi: This is the only clue to what's wrong with me!
(Electric sparks triggers Uzi to look over at N, seeing that both N and V have [ERROR: 606] on their visor. Uzi realises that they are in danger.)
Uzi: (Throwing the keybug, it hits Doll’s face) Just leave us alone.
(Uzi closes the door in Doll's face. Doll looks down at the keybug in her hands.)
Doll: (To Khan) Вы воспитали хорошую дочь, Мистер Дорман. (You raised a good daughter, Mr. Doorman.)
Khan: Heh, to spite me maybe.
Doll: Боже, ладно. (Jeez, alright.) (She teleports away.)
==Scene 12==
(Back in N’s memories, V is trying to grab the tools with her claw but fails, while the Eldritch bangs its head against the wall .)
Eldritch Cyn: Grab it. Just grab it. GRAB IT. Intimidating glare.
N: Whoa, Cyn! For an eldritch... uh, monster thingy—
Eldritch Cyn: The Solver of the Absolute Fabric, the void, the exponential end.
N: ...Peep this...?
(Using his teeth, he grabs V's glasses and puts them back over her eyes. This allows her to see clearer to pick up the tool.)
N: I got you.
V: ...Gold...en... Retrievers have...
N: Gentle mouths, dude—
Eldritch Cyn: (Grabs V and holds her up to the ceiling) Cute, false, gross...true. Let's just delete your OS's, then. (She prepares to wipe N's memory clean while N looks in horror.) Goodbye, "buddy". Execute.
V: N!
(Eldritch Cyn starts to swing a hammer with a sharp end into N's face... But she stops.)
Eldritch Cyn: (Under severe lag) Wha-What-at i-is hap-pen-pen-pening?
(Uzi regains control.)
Uzi: U-ugh, so-r-ry. My freaking dad's stream— WHOA! (She accidentally hits N with the blunt part of the hammer.) Whoops!
(Uzi releases V and she falls to the floor. N helps her up.)
N: (Looks over at Uzi.) Uzi?
Uzi: Don't freakin' dox me!
N: Thanks.
V: You little narc! Get out of my head!
(N and V wake up in Uzi's room, back in the real world. Uzi chuckles devilishly as she turns around in her chair to face them. She drops the smile when V threatens her with a chainsaw.)
==Scene 13==
(Outside, Doll teleports back out to the winter wastelands, where she meets J and Tessa.)
Doll: Вот ваш ключ. (Here's your key.) (She throws the key to Tessa.) Возьми меня с собой. в этом сделка— (Take me with you. That's the deal—)
(Tessa shoots her, but misses, probably due to Doll's AbsoluteSolver.)
Tessa: ...Just checking. Let's go.
(They turn around... And come face to face with Uzi, N, and V.)
Everyone: HUH—
(Credits roll.)
ru:Дом/Стенограмма
Category:Transcripts