Planes/Transcript

Transcript of Planes
==Transcript==
=== (01) More Than a Crop Duster ===
MAN: (ON RADIO) Look alive.
Contact appears to be heading 315 miles.
Speed 430, Angels. Approximately 2,000.
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
What's taking this guy so long?
Is he really as good as they say he is?
No. Better.
Oh, yeah!
Whoa! Who was that?
Well, hello, ladies. Are you ready to lose?
Last one to the water tower buys a round of fuel.
Tell you what, I'll give you guys a head start.
-You're going to need it.
-Later, loser.
One one-thousand, two one... Oh, that's enough.
See ya, suckers!
Eat my...
-Dusty! (COUGHING)
-Oh! Aw...
(DUSTY GROANS) 
Pay attention. You're daydreaming again.
Me? No, no, no! No.
Okay, yes.
But, you know, come on, Leadbottom.
Really? How hard is this?
Fly straight, turn around. Fly straight, turn around.
Are you disrespecting the sweet science of aerial application?
Look, I am more than just a crop duster.
Don't go flap-jawing
about that Flings Around the Planet air racing nonsense again.
DUSTY: Excuse me, it is called the Wings Around the Globe Rally.
For the love of Peterbilt!
And it's not nonsense. I've got a tight turn radius
and a high power-to-weight ratio.
-You know what else you got?
-What?
A screw loose!
I mean, why would you want to give up crop-dusting?
Blue skies, no air traffic, and that tangy scent of Vita-minamulch.
(INHALES) Mmm.
Just like Momma used to spray.
Delicious.
They say the sense of smell is the first thing to go.
-You smell it?
-Quitting time!
(SCOFFS) A crop duster wanting to be a racer.
If you ask me, more racers should want to be crop dusters.
I got some minamulch, yeah! Minamulch
(INDISTNCT CHATTERING)
Yuck! Nowadays, they got soybean fuel, switchgrass fuel, algae fuel. Come on!
-Oh, healthy! No tank you.
-Tell me about it.
-What's next, pistachio propane?
-What, are you nuts?
For my money, there's nothing like good old-fashioned corn fuel.
-Oh, yeah, you betcha.
-I even made up a slogan.
Oh, slogans are good.
(CLEARS THROAT) "Corn. It gives you gas."
Catchy. I like that.
Me, too. There you go, Sparky, you're all set.
-Catch you later, Chug.
-Sure thing.
(OVER RADIO) This is Dusty Crophopper to Chug. Over.
Uh, Chug isn't here. Come on, use the new call sign.
Right, right, right.
This is Strut Jetstream calling Turbo Coach Truck-zilla.
-Ready for practice?
-You betcha, Strut.
Ha-ha! Whoo!
Young punk.
CHUG: All right, buddy, I got you in sight.
Now let's start with some corn-row sprints.
Drop and give me 20!
(ENGINE ROARS)
CHUG: Come on, buddy, keep it going!
-Ooh, nice turn.
-What else you got?
Okay. Now, let's try some treeline moguls.
DUSTY: Yeah!
CHUG: All the way up and down.
Don't be dogging it.
-That's how you do it.
-Ooh, yeah!
-Looking good!
-Uh-huh.
Okay, adjust your angle of bank with your alien irons!
-You mean "ailerons"?
-Oh, yeah.
Oh, great.
=== (02) Not Built to Race ===
DOTTIE: Oil lines and oil cooler check out.
DUSTY: Hmm-hmm.
-AN-8 fittings look fine.
-Nice.
Wait a minute.
You've worn out your main oil-seal.
Huh. Really?
That kind of damage comes from extremely high speeds.
Hey!
Pushing the engine to the red line for prolonged periods of time.
-That would be unwise.
-But that's not you.
You're a crop duster and all you do is just dust crops
-at very low speeds.
-Yep, low and slow.
Unless you've been racing again!
No! What, me? No.
Oh, man, Duster, you were in the zone,
where a Saturn rocket couldn't catch you!
Ballistic!
We're talking light speed. Light speed, here!
You're going to tear it up at the qualifier this weekend.
Yea... Oh, Shelby.
Um... I don't know.
Dusty, you're not built to race.
You're built to dust crops.
Do you know what will happen if you push it too far?
Wing flutter, metal fatigue, turbine failure.
-(GASPING) Turbine failure? 
-Oh, no, I'm going down!
Why didn't I listen to Dottie?
Yeah, why don't you listen to Dottie?
She's the smartest mechanic in the world!
-Oh, my gosh!
-What?
-The orphanage!
-CHUG: No.
-Not the orphanage!
-Kids, out of the way!
Kaboom!
-CHUG: The kids!
-(GROANS)
-(GASPS)
-(GROANING DRAMATICALLY)
-(GASPING)
-(CHOKES)
Wow! That was vivid and specific.
And exactly why I need you to come with us to the qualifier.
You're unbelievable.
Oh. Did you hear that? I'm unbelievable.
(SOBBING) The orphans!
(SIGHS)
Tune in, in two weeks for the start of the Wings Around the Globe.
You know, I think we've got a really good shot at this, buddy.
Oh, yeah! Especially if I finish this book by then.
Oh! I love this show!
BRENT: The 10 best air crashes of all time!
-CHUG: Whoa! Oh.
-DUSTY: Not good.
CHUG: How does that happen?
(DUSTY AND CHUG EXCLAIMING)
That is not going to buff out.
You know, this might not cover everything you could run into out there.
-What are you getting at?
-(STAMMERS) I don't know.
I'm just wondering if maybe we need, uh, some help.
Help? From who?
Oh, well, like the Skipper.
That old Corsair down at the end of the runway?
-Sure, he's a war hero.
-He's an old crankshaft.
My buddy, Sparky, says the Skipper
was a legendary flight instructor in the navy.
That's right. He knows stuff.
He's been grounded for decades.
Why would I want to be coached by a plane who doesn't even fly?
At least he's a plane.
BRENT: The number one crash of all time...
Oh, man!
PLANE: I'm okay.
(EXPLOSION ON TV)
BRENT: Ooh! That's got to hurt.
=== (03) Skipper ===
(WIND HOWLING)
CHUG: They say he shot down 50 planes.
I heard stories about his squadron, the Jolly Wrenches.
Hmm-hmm.
They were the roughest, toughest, meanest flyers in the navy.
Ruthless killers who showed no mercy.
-Uh, wait, so...
-No mercy!
They would shoot you as soon as look at you.
-I hope you're right about this.
-(DOORBELL RINGS)
Chug!
I'll wait here.
(DOOR OPENING)
DUSTY: Uh...
Hey, there, Skipper. (NERVOUS CHUCKLE)
Say, I'm trying out for the Wings Around the Globe Rally.
And I know you can't fly anymore,
but, you know, they say, "Those who can't do, teach."
So... (GULPS)
Okay, what I mean to say is, you're not a truck.
So, I was wondering if you would train me?
CHUG: Go on, he's warming up to you.
(DOORBELL RINGS)
So, I heard you shot down 50 planes.
You looking to be number 51?
Uh... No.
No, no, no! Wait, wait.
I just... I figured, with my guts and your glory...
Your guts would be a grease spot on a runway somewhere.
Go home. You're in over your head, kid.
Look, you flew all those...
(SIGHS)
CHUG: Let's try the back door.
=== (04) Time Trials ===
CHUG: Hello, Lincoln! (HONKS HORN) Hey, Dusty!
I don't know how you talked me into coming to this.
Now, come on, Dottie.
Wow! I don't believe it. A Red Tail P-51!
DUSTY: Oh, man! A Sea Fury!
Check it out!
Wow!
NED: (OVER PA) Ladies and gentleplanes.
May we have your attention, please?
Kindly direct your windscreens to the heavens above
and give a warm welcome to our special guest.
The Prince of Propellers.
When he's speeding, he's the leading.
Get my good side, fellas.
When he's grinning, he's winning.
The one and only
-Ripslinger!
-(CROWD CHEERING)
You're caught in the riptide! (CHUCKLES)
-Thanks for coming out.
-(DOTTIE COUGHING)
Who wants a picture? All right, one at a time.
Well, with all that self-promotion, at least he's modest.
Dottie, that's Ripslinger.
He's captain of Team RPX. They call him...
BOTH: The Green Tornado.
He's so good, he's pre-qualified.
Oh. And those two, Ned and Zed.
BOTH: The Twin Turbos.
They're world-class racers.
You know, I hear they used to be one plane and were separated at birth.
Wow. I wish I was separated at birth.
Okay, people.
This is the last of four time trials being held worldwide.
Today's qualifying round is one lap around the pylons.
The top five finishers will qualify for the Wings Around the Globe Rally.
Oh yeah.
Fonzarelli, you're up, my man.
(SPITS)
Oh, man! That's nasty.
And he's through the start gate!
The racers must pass through the blue pylons on the horizontal
and around the red pylons on the knife-edge.
Now he's coming back to Gate Three!
Nicely done, my man.
Setting himself up a little high through the blue pylons there,
lining up for the quadro.
He's taking a hard right with a 270-degree high-G turn! Yeah!
Back all the way around. Whoo!
-Cleanly through. Ha! Look at you, man!
-That guy's good.
It doesn't get much better than that. All right. Good speed.
Lining up for the three-pylon chicane, amazing pitch control.
Smooth! Fast! Clean!
He's going into the final turn,
into the half-Cuban 8, pulling an aggressive 9.2 Gs.
Attacking the climb!
Wow. Now that's some speed.
Coming out of the Cuban 8 at the end of a fantastic first run, people.
A 01.24.16.
A very good time for the other racers to try and beat.
Fast, tight through the pylons.
He's got a great pace going, here.
He's just a half a second behind.
-Oh! Engine failure!
-CROWD: Oh!
Out of the race. Bye-bye.
Great performance. Watch the clock here.
I can't wait. Lining up for the Blue Gate.
Oh, no, he did not! That's a major penalty.
-Sorry, dude. Eighth place.
-(GROANS)
Talk about fast.
Coming out the Cuban 8.
Fueled and ready, man.
Okay, bud, you're up.
Good and tight.
-All set.
-It's been a wonderful day here, and we're down to our last competitor.
This is it.
From Propwash Junction, Strut Jetstream.
"Strut Jetstream"?
Yep. Awesomest call sign ever. (CHUCKLES) It was my idea.
-Ah. That explains it.
-Hey, ag-plane!
Landscaping was yesterday, man. Get off the runway. We're racing, here.
-Second call for Strut Jetstream.
-No, no, no!
-Looking for...
-Yo! I'm Strut Jetstream.
-You are Strut Jetstream?
-Yep.
A crop duster? Man, what's going on here?
Is everybody getting to fly today?
Man, your momma must have had high hopes for you.
Now, you know you are built for seed, not speed.
You have got to be kidding me.
-That farmer's going to race?
-(LAUGHS)
Seriously, with a prop that small?
Maybe he races that leaky,
old fuel truck next to him.
Who are you calling leaky?
I'll leak on you, if you don't check your intake.
Don't lower yourself to their level.
Go on Dus... Go on, Strut.
-(PLANES LAUGHING)
-PLANE 1: Who's that guy?
-You're going to try out?
-PLANE 2: A crop duster?
FORKLIFT: Cornfield is over that way.
Nice of you to take the day off just to lose!
(ALL LAUGHING)
Go, Duster!
It's going to be a tall order for him to knock Fonzarelli out of fifth place.
And he's off!
Well, he's starting a little conservative.
This ought to be rich.
193 miles per hour.
He's into Gate Two, clean through the horizontal.
What? He's practically mowing the lawn.
Come to my house, man.
Okay. At the first split, he's a full second behind Fonzarelli.
Yo, that's a lot of time to make up, but this guy's aggressive.
Now he's making that hard 270-degree high-G turn!
Whoo! That's it!
Setting himself up. Left vertical turn.
Lining up for the three-pylon chicane.
He's gaining speed.
Now, he's only half a second behind Fonzarelli.
And he is closing rapidly.
Now he's back on that stick. Up he goes! Up and away!
Now only two-tenths of a second behind Fonzarelli!
-Come on, Duster!
-Oh, it's going to be close.
He's going to do it. He's going to do it.
Oh, yes! What a finish! Now, that's what you call flying!
Way to go, Dustmeister.
That's what I'm talking about.
Jetstream, the official time is
1 minute, 24.26 seconds.
Sixth place, but what a close one, people.
Well, folks, that wraps up the trials for the Wings Around the Globe Rally.
Hey, pal, sixth place ain't nothing to be ashamed of.
That was a heck of a run.
Thanks.
=== (05) Dusty Is In ===
ROPER: Ow! Dagnabbit! Let me drive!
There you go, topped off and all set, Mayday.
Will you stop! Unbelievable!
Why don't you just go back!
I mean, I think you actually missed a pothole!
Man, you got to be the worst,
I mean the worst delivery truck that has ever delivered a delivery!
-Can I help you?
-(COUGHING)
Please tell me this is Propwash Junction.
Sure is.
Oh, finally. You know, you're not even on the map.
Yeah, pretty drive though, ain't it?
Oh, yeah. Especially if you like looking at dirt and corn.
Anyway, I'm looking for a Strut Jetstream.
-Who?
-Jetstream. Strut Jetstream.
Nope, doesn't ring a bell. Do you have a photo?
Yeah, I got one right here. No, I don't have a photo!
I have documentation that says
Strut Jetstream lives in Propwash Junction.
Oh, whoa, whoa! Whoa, wait a minute! Okay! Oh...
No, gosh I...
Hey, I'm Strut Jetstream.
Yeah! That's right! (LAUGHS)
I knew I'd remember. There he is, strutting on over here.
But you're mispronouncing it slightly.
-I am?
-Mmm-hmm. Yeah.
It's actually pronounced "Dusty Crophopper."
Dusty Crophopper.
Yeah. It's Scandinavian.
Right, and I'm Egyptian.
(SNIFFS) Googly moogly! What is that smell?
-It's Vita-minamulch.
-Vita-mina-what?
The finest-smelling compost this side of the Mississippi.
Original, creamy and chunky style.
(SNIFFS) Oh, yeah. Smell that? It's like daffodils
and like Sunday dinner. I just love it. I love it.
I got some minamulch, yeah! I got some minamulch, yeah!
That old airplane needs some help. Y'all know that, right?
BOTH: Yeah.
Are you familiar with the racing fuel additive, nitro methane?
Oh, yeah! Zip juice! Go-go punch!
That stuff will blur your vision and slur your speech.
-It's illegal.
-Totally illegal.
Wouldn't know what it looks like. Yeah, you were saying?
That substance was found in the tank of the fifth-place qualifier, Fonzarelli.
Illegal fuel intake is an automatic DQ.
(STAMMERS) Wait, so you're saying...
He's out, you're in. Congratulations.
-You're in?
-Hmm.
He's in! (WHISTLES)
You're never going to believe this. He's in!
Dusty's in the race! Dottie, he's in!
What? Are you serious?
Whoo! Dusty.
DOTTIE: Don't do anything crazy. Fly safe.
Man, it's going to be cool.
You're going to cross oceans thousands of miles wide.
Freezing your rudder off one day...
-And burning it off the next!
-Freaking hurricanes.
-Cyclones!
-Typhoons!
-Monsoons!
-Tornadoes!
-Sandstorms!
-Gale force winds!
Yeah! (WHOOPING)
=== (06) Training with Skipper ===
Hmm. (SIGHS)
SKIPPER: Bad idea.
You'll end up a smoking hole on the side of a mountain
with your parts spread over five countries.
What makes you say that?
You're going up against the best racers in the world.
And some of them don't even finish.
You're sloppy on your rolls,
wide on your turns, slow on your straightaways.
You've been watching me?
Yeah, watching you make a fool out of yourself.
You need to be tighter getting in and out of your knife-edge.
Okay.
Any extra control input costs you speed and seconds.
-So, you think I'm overcorrecting?
-Absolutely. Rookie mistake.
Are you giving me pointers?
No! I'm telling you to forget all this racing malarkey.
You just ain't built for it. You're a crop duster!
You don't think I know that?
I'm the one who's been flying back and forth
across the same fields day after day, month after month, for years!
I have flown thousands of miles
and I have never been anywhere.
Not like you.
You were built to fight, and look what you did!
You're a hero.
I'm just trying to prove that maybe, just maybe,
I can do more than what I was built for.
(SIGHS)
You know what? Just forget it.
You'll never understand.
0500, tomorrow. Don't be late.
Wait. 0500?
Yeah, 5:00 a.m.
(ROOSTER CROWING)
(SPARKY HUMMING)
-Sparky, binoculars.
-(BLOWING)
Those are some mighty clean optics, there.
What do you use? Some kind of shammy?
-Oo, no, it's a special microfiber cloth.
-Ah. Microfiber.
Yeah, lint-free, scratch-free. I'll get you some.
I got an ex-Navy buddy who sells them to me wholesale.
I helped him set up his web...
Knock it off. We got a lot of work to do.
-(WHISPERS) I'll hook you up.
-Thanks.
SKIPPER: All right, Dusty, remember this.
It ain't how fast you fly, it's how you fly fast.
-Roger that.
-Show me what you got.
DUSTY: Watch this! Oh, yeah.
SKIPPER: Great, you can go up and down. What else?
-Show me your turns.
-Here we go!
You think that was good? That stunk! Knife-edge those elm trees.
Oh, come on. Keep your nose up!
Hey, Skip.
-You want speed, right?
-Yeah.
-Serious, bolt-rattling speed?
-Oh, yeah!
Then look up. Do you see those clouds?
The highway in the sky.
Tailwinds like nothing you've ever flown.
What are you waiting for?
Come on, power up. Firewall thrust.
Max torque, max torque!
All right, looking good.
Hold V-Y, Dusty. Max rate, now.
Your nose is too high. Get your nose down.
You're going to stall. Ease off the pitch. Nose down!
Oh!
Hey, what are you doing?
(PANTING)
(EXHALES)
SKIPPER: What just happened up there?
I'm... I'm low on fuel.
Do I look like I was built yesterday?
-No, no. It's a long story.
-I got time.
Uh...
Okay, well, um, you know,
I feel like I was having some problems with my axial compressor so...
The Jolly Wrenches have a motto, Volo Pro Veritas.
It means "I fly for truth."
Clearly, you don't.
Sparky, push me back to the hangar.
(STAMMERS)
I'm afraid of heights.
(BRAKES SCREECHING)
-But you're a plane.
-I'm a crop duster.
I've never flown over a thousand feet.
Are you kidding?
Scared of heights and you want to race around the world?
Uh, Skip, during the attack of Tujunga Harbor,
why, even the P-38s had trouble at high altitudes.
Well, they didn't have to fly over the Himalayas, did they?
I'll still be low to the ground, just high up.
And after the war, those 38s went on to win races.
Really? Is that true?
Yeah, true. Like in the Cleveland race of '46.
-For real?
-Wait, it gets better.
In '49, the P-38 Sky Ranger averaged 337 miles per hour.
Wait, 337?
Well, actually 337.4, but they round it down in the record books.
Why would you do that?
Some people just have no respect for decimal points.
-Yeah, I know. Tell me about it.
-Why couldn't they round it up?
-Seriously, he...
-All right, all right.
So, you're a flat-hatter. We'll work on that.
But for now let's see if we can turn low and sloppy into low and fast.
Roger that.
It'll go like this.
The flag marks the start line.
Across the cornfield, three silos are waiting for you.
Slalom those with a radial-G pass.
DUSTY: Wait. "A radial" what pass?
SKIPPER: Once you get to the trees,
go to your optimal rate of climb to about 500 feet.
Roll inverted and extend, trading altitude for air speed
-and dive toward the finish line.
-DUSTY: Uh, okay.
You string all that together, you might have a chance to beat him.
Who am I racing?
SKIPPER: Here he comes.
He's a twin commuter pushing about 1500 horsepower.
DUSTY: Uh, he's pretty high up.
SKIPPER: You're not racing him, you're racing his shadow.
Beat it to the water tower.
Let's do this! Thread the silos!
Tighter! Lean into your turns more.
-His turns are terrible.
-Yeah.
SKIPPER: Let's go, Dusty. Faster.
You're falling behind.
Begin your climb and catch him in the dive.
Start your dive now.
Never mind, you already lost.
(GROANS)
So, we can increase power or we can decrease drag.
(GASPS) Definitely increase power.
-(BEEPS)
-(MACHINE WHIRRING)
More torque means more speed.
Lousy.
Come on, let's work that radial-G turn.
Do it again. One more time. Again!
Come on! Push it, Dusty!
Better!
Remember now, altitude for airspeed.
Gravity is your ally.
The laws of physics govern speed.
All right, Dusty. Give this run all you've got.
Use your radial-G.
Let gravity work for you.
Looking good. That's what I'm talking about.
Firewall the throttle! Go! Go! Go!
You got it, Duster!
(MOOING)
SKIPPER: Begin your climb!
All right, altitude for airspeed.
Catch him in the dive!
Dive now!
-Ballistic!
-(WHOOPING)
(LAUGHING)
He kicked Aston Martins out there!
-CHUG: Dusterino!
-He's ready.
-DUSTY: Whoa!
-CHUG: Oh, that's cool.
The piston and cross-wrenches. Your squadron insignia.
-You've earned it.
-CHUG: It fits you.
-It fits you, Dusty. (SNIFFLES)
-SKIPPER: Now, listen.
When the race starts and all those planes take off,
it'll stir up a bunch of swirlies
just like the Wrenches ran into in the Battle of Airway.
Roger that. Sure wish you were coming with me, Skip.
Just radio back when you get to the check points.
I'll be your wingman from here.
Volo Pro Veritas, right?
Volo Pro Veritas.
-Kick some tail, buddy.
-We're all proud of you.
Whoo-hoo! Dustmeister!
=== (07) Meeting the Contestants ===
(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING)
Wow.
TOWER CONTROLLER: Break, break.
Air racer number 7, Air racer number 7.
Do you read? Kennedy approach, over.
(STAMMERS)
I'm Dusty Crophopper, I'm looking for JFK airport.
Crophopper 7, you are supposed to be on the Carnice visual.
Turn further left, heading 1-9-5.
Maintain 1,000 feet. Intercept the 22 right localizer.
You are cleared for the ILS 22, right approach.
-Roger.
-Heavy is sectored in behind you.
Run that by me one more time.
Turn further left, heading 1-9-5. Maintain 1,000...
DUSTY: Never mind. I got it.
Do you see him?
Well, radar does, but I don't see diddly.
Check out this pavement! Nice! It's so smooth.
Crophopper 7, you passed Foxtrot. Turn left onto Charlie.
Hold short at 22.
Wait, I thought...
-Get off the runway!
-Whoa!
-(HORNS HONKING)
-(GASPS)
-Oh. Sorry.
-Go back to Jersey, you bum.
Excuse me, where can I...
Hey-ho, do you mind? I'm working here.
Sorry.
A nice enough guy, but way too much baggage, if you know what I mean.
Oh, hey, there. I'm looking for pit row.
The pits? Oh, yeah, that's easy.
You want to go down this way toward the fire station.
Then taxiway alpha forks off to the left.
But don't go that way. You want to veer right.
And if you get to the orange barrels, you went too far. So...
Just go straight ahead and to the right.
Great, thanks. Hey, nice paint job.
Well, thank you! I'm kind of proud of it.
-I think he was talking to me.
-Oh.
Well, looky who's here. The Scandinavian.
-Hey. Uh...
-Miss your home town?
I don't. Just about blocked that memory out of my mind.
But you're bringing it right back with that...
(SNIFFS) Oh, man, that nasty Vita-mina-stink-a-bunch.
Your tent's the last one on the left. Go!
(CHUCKLES) Okay.
Power wash is on the right. Just saying.
Wow! Bulldog? From the European Cup? The Big Dog!
Hey, I saw you do this unbelievable high-G vertical turn.
How did you do that?
Well, let me tell you.
In fact, why don't I tell you all my racing secrets?
-Really?
-No.
Look, I don't know how things work
in the backwater from which you hail, matey,
but this is a competition.
Every plane for himself! Goodbye.
Yeah, sure.
-Whoa... Whoa!
-Oh.
(CHUCKLES) Uh... Oh.
Wait a second. This is aeroshell 100.
I thought I ordered the DT-2380.
Well, I am sorry you had to see that.
-Are you all right?
-Sure. Why wouldn't I be?
And you are Pan-Asian Champion and Mumbai Cup record holder, Ishani.
Most people call me just "Ishani."
I'm Dusty. I mean, uh, my name is Dusty.
(CHUCKLES) I'm not actually dusty, I'm quite clean.
It's very nice to meet you, "quite clean" Dusty. (LAUGHS)
Nice to meet you, too.
Look at that propeller.
Ooh.
A little over there. Not so much pressure, okay?
Oh, excuse me, guys. Pardon me.
Yeah.
Hey, look who made it!
-It's the crop duster.
-Hey.
You know, having you here is a nice vehicle-interest story.
Small-town farmer makes it to the big time.
Yes, sir.
-But tragically crashes on takeoff.
-What?
Wings Around the Globe winner, Ripslinger,
eulogizes the unknown hayseed and scatters his debris over a cornfield.
Ratings will be through the roof!
-Okay.
-Good luck.
-Farm boy.
-What?
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
The hero of the people has arrived.
(LAUGHS)
You have never heard of the great El Chupacabra?
(LATIN MUSIC PLAYING)
Hey, isn't that that monster that siphons fuel from small vehicles?
No, no, no, it's just a stage name
designed to strike fear into the hearts of my opponents. (GROWLS)
Yeah, he's the indoor racing champion of all Mexico.
Indoor racing?
(WHOOPING)
And numero uno recording artist, telenovela star and romance novelist.
Did you say El Chupacabra or El Cuckoo-cabra?
You make joke? You make joke?
Very well. You leave me no choice!
I swish my cape at you!
You have been shamed.
I hope I can get over it.
-Oh. I just did!
-(ALL LAUGHING)
Hey, I saw you race on Telemoto last year.
Of course, it was in Spanish, so I didn't understand everything.
I am flattered, avión pequeño.
You have done many of these long distance rallies, yes?
-No, this is my first one.
-It is my first time, as well!
We will have many adventures, you and I.
We will laugh, we will cry, we will dance!
Um... Wow.
-Probably not with each other.
-Of course.
I will see you in the skies, amigo.
-(WHOOPING)
-(LAUGHS)
=== (08) The Race Begins ===
BRENT: Race fans, it's that time of year again.
Welcome to the Wings Around the Globe.
Hello, I'm Brent Mustangburger,
and this is the flagship event of the world's fastest sport
where only the best of the best compete.
Each leg brings a new challenge,
testing agility, navigation and endurance.
But when it's all said and done, speed is the name of the game.
Our very own Colin Cowling
is standing by live from JFK airport with the best seat in the house.
How's the view, big guy?
Brent, the scene below me is absolutely electric.
As you know, we have racers from all over the world, here.
But the real story should be who's coming in second
to three-time defending champ, Ripslinger,
who is seeking to become the first four-time winner
in the Wings Around the Globe.
The racers are making their way to the runway.
-DOTTIE: It's Dusty!
-Whoo!
All right, everybody, get your Dusty bobbleheads.
Your oven mitts, hats, bumper stickers, and I also ordered
-a thousand commemorative whistles.
-(WHITSLES)
Hey, you think you can help me set up a website?
Does a giga bite?
Well, not if you pet him nicely.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
PHOTOGRAPHER: Dusty!
(REPORTERS CLAMORING)
BRENT: One-hundred and thirty-six nations compete.
Twenty-one planes selected.
Folks, a step onto this field, is a step into history.
(CHEERING)
Holy smokes!
And for the first time ever, folks, we have a crop duster in the race.
A crop duster?
Well, he's gonna die.
CROWD: (CHANTERING) Ripslinger! Ripslinger!
Wow!
Ripslinger! Ripslinger! Ripslinger!
Yeah. You're caught in the riptide! (LAUGHS)
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
Whoa. Look at this crowd.
Stay focused, amigo. Don't let anything distract you.
Ay-yay!
Who is that vision?
That's Rochelle, the Canadian rally champ.
She is like an angel, sent from heaven.
Like a sunrise after a lifetime of darkness.
Like fresh fertilizer on a field of dying grass.
This is not your thing, my friend.
All right, racers. Start your engines!
(ENGINES REVVING)
BRENT: Seven legs, over 31,000 kilometers,
the world's highest mountains, and the deepest oceans
all stand before them
just waiting to be conquered by the right competitor.
(CHEERING)
Here we go. Oh, boy!
BRENT: All the preparation.
It all comes down to this moment.
One of these planes is about to fly off into the pages of sports history
-and become a champion.
-(EXHALES)
Go!
BRENT: And we are under way!
(CROWD CHEERING)
Whoa! Swirlies!
Whoa! Whoa.
(SIGHS)
BRENT: Our first stage is a Whopper.
A dead sprint across the North Atlantic.
COLIN: That's right, Brent. This is how it works, folks.
The winner of the leg today is the first to take off tomorrow.
(SHIVERING)
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
-(WIND HOWLING)
-(SHIVERING)
(LAUGHS) Hey, look who's finally here! It's that low-flying farmer boy!
You do know this is a race, right?
(LAUGHING)
-That's a good one, boss.
-(SHIVERS)
Excuse me, how much does a snow plow weigh?
Je ne sais pas. I do not know.
Enough to break the ice. I am El Chupacabra.
-Ah. You are the snow plow, oui?
-You could say that, yes.
-And I am the ice?
-Yes.
Cold, frozen and lifeless?
No, I... It sounds better in Spanish.
(LAUGHS) Why don't you go plow yourself, El Chu-toy?
She is like an angel.
CHUG: (ON RADIO) This is Propwash Junction to Dusty Crophopper.
I read you, Chug.
So what's it like racing with the big dogs, Duster?
-Well, my wings froze solid.
-Man!
-I had icicles hanging off my sprayer.
-All right!
And I nearly smashed into a 10-story iceberg.
Awesome!
Yeah, "awesome" is not quite the word that I would use
to describe a gruesome near-death experience.
You hang in there, buddy.
There's nothing better than dying while doing what you love most.
DOTTIE: (SIGHS) That's gonna make him feel a lot better.
Dusty, just like when the Jolly Wrenches
were up in the Aleutians
the air down close to the sea has more moisture,
which is why you took on ice.
-You gotta try to fly higher.
-Great.
SKIPPER: The good news is
tomorrow's leg goes through the Bavarian obstacle course.
It's all about agility, so it's your chance to move up.
And remember, it's not speed that wins races, it's skill.
=== (09) Helping Bulldog ===
(EXLAMING IN DISTRESS)
BULLDOG: Mayday! Mayday! Mayday! I'm blinded. I can't see.
We're receiving breaking news
of an incident in the skies over Germany involving one of the racers.
Let's check in with Skycam 1 for more information.
Bulldog, the legendary flyer from
the UK, is in tremendous danger.
It looks like he's flying blind, losing speed, losing altitude...
Wait! It's Racer Number 7, Crophopper,
-pulling up beside him.
-What's he doing?
-Bulldog, apply your left aileron.
-Okay.
Stop roll.
-Now, quick, pull up.
-Got it.
Harder, harder!
Slight roll right. Good!
Whoa! Big castle! Pull up! Hard roll right!
Stop roll.
BULLDOG: Are you still there?
DUSTY: I'm right here. I'll fly right alongside you.
PA ANNOUNCER: Achtung! We have a mayday! Clear the runway!
Achtung! Clear the runway!
-Add power.
-Okay.
-Easy, now.
-Yes.
Good. Flaps down, lock them.
Careful.
Landing gear down.
Yeah, and locked.
Begin your flare.
Power back a little.
(GASPING)
Touchdown! Nicely done!
(CROWD CHEERING)
(PANTING)
Thanks for your help, matey.
I couldn't have done it without...
You? You saved me?
What did I tell you, boy? Every plane for himself, right?
Where I come from, if you see someone falling from the sky...
Yes, but this is a competition. Now, you're dead last.
And I owe you my life.
(BULLDOG SOBBING)
Are you crying?
I don't cry, I'm British!
Thanks, matey.
Sure thing, Bulldog.
REPORTERS: Bulldog!
(REPORTERS CLAMORING)
RIPSLINGER: Well, I gotta say, crop duster, you are a nice guy.
Hey. Thanks, Rip.
And we all know where nice guys finish.
(BOTH LAUGHING) Yeah!
(PLAYING POLKA MUSIC)
(INHAUDIBLE)
(SIGHS)
Dead last.
You sad, you drink.
-Thanks. Great advice.
-(EL CHUPACABRA SNIFFLES)
At least you are not last in the race for love.
Rochelle?
Her passion is, sadly, not for me. (SOBS)
-Tough break, El Chu.
-(HORN HONKING)
Excuse me.
My name is Franz, and I am a huge fan.
-I have fans?
-Oh, no, no, no. Just me.
And I would like to say danke for representing all us little planes.
Uh... You're a car.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I am what you call a Flugzeugauto,
one of only six flying cars ever built!
-Whoa!
-Guten Tag, Herr Dusty.
I am Von Fliegenhozen.
Didn't you just say your name was Franz?
Nein, nein, nein.
Franz is a guy with no spine
who is in charge when we putter about the cobblestones.
In the air, I am in charge.
This guy needs to get his head gasket checked.
Serious identity issues.
This from the one wearing a mask?
Touché.
We are both pulling for you, Herr Dusty.
Thanks for the support. I need all the help I can get.
I have a humble suggestion.
Would you not be much faster
without the pipes and tank and whatnot weighing you down?
My sprayer. Again?
Yeah. Why carry around the extra weight?
The little crazy car is right.
Perhaps you need to start thinking like a racer.
DUSTY: This is reversible, right?
Oh! Oh. Hey, you're being careful down there, right?
Whoa. Ooh! Yep, that's cold.
(IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) So?
(CLEARS THROAT)
(IN NORMAL VOICE) So, what do you think?
Wunderbar, Dusty.
Fantastico. (LAUGHS)
It is freeing, yes?
Yeah, you took the words right out of my mouth.
(DUSTY EXCLAIMING IN DELIGHT)
Bye-bye, sprayer!
Thanks for everything, Franz... Er, Von Fliegenhozen.
Guten luck, Herr Dusty.
=== (10) Dusty Pulls Ahead ===
BRENT: It's our third leg
and we've already lost several competitors to equipment failure.
COLIN: But the real story here, Brent, is Dusty Crophopper.
Absolutely.
He's passing one flier after another.
BRENT: That's right. This guy was built to dust crops,
but he's dusting the competition.
What's next, Colin?
COLIN: Brent, this could be Crophopper's leg, all the way.
The racers will have to fly under a hard ceiling of 1,000 feet.
Stay under the clouds and in the hills.
Number 20 is disqualified.
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
-BRENT: What a move.
-COLIN: Incredible.
-Look at that radial-G pass.
-Oh, yeah!
COLIN: From last place, all the way up to eighth.
FEMALE REPORTER: Mr. Ripslinger, you were built for racing.
RIPSLINGER: Yeah! You know it.
So how can a crop duster out-fly you?
-Wait, what?
-There he is!
Dusty!
-Wow!
-How do you keep up with the pros?
FEMALE REPORTER: Did working on the farm make you stronger?
MALE REPORTER: Dusty, Dusty! Why do you fly so low?
Why are they wasting their time with him?
He's a tractor with wings.
Actually, it's a really compelling underdog story.
It's like Rocky.
It's more like David and Goliath.
-Or Old Yeller.
-That's not an underdog story.
-Well, there's a dog in it.
-Enough!
Yeah, enough!
You know, they shot Old Yeller at the end, you twits.
Oh! Spoiler alert!
Soon, we'll be overrun by every banner tower, skywriter and air freighter
who thinks they can be one of us.
That farm boy forgot who he is and where he came from.
He's not about to stop me from making history.
Dusty, Dusty, where did you learn to race?
=== (11) Making a Plan ===
From my coach, Skipper.
He's the reason I'm even here. He's an amazing instructor.
And a great friend.
He flew dozens of missions all around the world.
And I'm sure, if he could, he'd be with us right now.
SPARKY: Whoa, your engine sounds kind of rough.
Must be a mag misfire.
It's probably not a good night for flying anyway.
-Okay. Come back soon.
-Hey, you got anything new?
I'm glad you asked.
I'm now selling these one-of-a-kind Dusty commemorative mugs.
Huh?
BOTH: Whoa!
(OVER RADIO) This is Dusty Crophopper calling...
-I'll be back in 10.
-Dusty, eighth place!
Way to go, Dustmeister!
-Hey! You finally removed your M5000.
-His what?
His Micro-Air-5000-D-L Aerial Applicator.
Use your words.
His sprayer.
Right! Sprayer.
Dusty, you got a big leg tomorrow.
-Yeah.
-Skipper: How you feeling?
CHUG: I can't believe it. The mighty Himalayas.
DOTTIE: Dusty, that vertical wind shear
is going to be wicked over those mountains.
Well, the good thing about being that high up,
you see, there's not a lot of oxygen.
So, if you crash, no explosion.
Great, Chug.
(CHUCKLES) Of course, you could die of hypothermia
or an avalanche could get you.
Then, of course, there's pneumonia, or even frostbite.
Chug, Chug, I got it.
Skip, what if a guy wanted to fly
through the mountains instead of over them?
SKIPPER: Bad idea. The Wrenches flew through terrain like that
in the Assault of Kunming. And Dottie is right.
Wind coming over the peaks can stir up rotors
that'll drag you right down.
If you ask me, it's time to lug-nut up.
You can fly a whole lot higher than you think.
-Roger that.
-EL CHUPACABRA: Hola, corazón.
-Are you tired?
-What?
Because you have been flying through my mind, nonstop.
Hmm. And why would I be tired flying through such a teeny, tiny space, huh?
You can only pretend for so long.
Hey, El Chu, what's the problem?
(SIGHS) I am Icarus and she is the sun.
I fly too close and I melt.
Maybe you're trying too hard.
Look, all you got to do is go over, open your mouth and say...
ISHANI: Hello.
DUSTY: Wha... Uh...
Whoa.
(GULPS)
El Chupacabra!
I think someone is calling me. I have to go.
I wanted to compliment you on your success, Dusty.
You're doing very well for your first race.
Aw, that means a lot, coming from you.
I mean, come on,
you were named most aerodynamic racer by Air Sports Illustrated.
And let me just say, you are so aerodynamic.
Dusty.
(GIGGLES)
(TRACTORS MOOING)
DUSTY: What's with all the tractors around here?
They're sacred.
Many believe that we will be recycled as tractors.
Oh. Well, I believe in recycling.
Have you ever been to the Taj Mahal?
No. No, I haven't.
Come on. Let's go.
It must be nice to be back home.
Well, it's complicated. I have a billion fans.
And they're all expecting me to win.
-Maybe this time, you will.
-(LAUGHS)
DUSTY: Wow.
This place is amazing.
It really is.
And tomorrow, you'll fly over the magnificent Himalayas.
Those little hills? Yeah, well... No big deal.
You like to fly low, don't you?
Oh. Oh, that? Uh, that's strategic.
Air density and, uh, combustion.
You know, you could follow the Iron Compass, instead.
-Iron Compass?
-Yeah, rail road tracks.
Through a valley in the mountains, so you can still fly low.
Really?
Thanks, Ishani.
Anytime.
=== (12) The Iron Compass ===
BRENT: Every racer's nightmare is scaling the Himalayas.
It's a short leg ahead, but extremely treacherous.
(GASPS)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(EXHALES)
(SIGHS IN RELIEF)
No.
Ow! Ah!
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
Whoa!
(GASPS)
Whoa!
Uh...
(ECHOING) Hello?
Is this where I'm supposed to be?
That is one of life's great questions.
(GASPS)
I'm dead!
Mr. Crophopper.
Welcome to Nepal.
I don't understand. Have the others left already?
Actually, no one else is here yet.
You're in first place.
Really?
He flew through a what?
-A tunnel?
-That is crazy!
Si, crazy like a Firefox.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Dusty, how does it feel to be in first place?
It feels great.
But more than anything, I'm just happy I fit through that tunnel.
Guys, I gotta tell you, if you're ever in a tight squeeze just...
Excuse me, guys.
-Crazy day today, huh?
-(GASPS)
Oh. Yeah, a very exciting win for you today.
(CHUCKLES) Quite a risk you took.
Yeah, yeah. Hey, your propeller, is it new?
Oh. I suppose it is.
Sky Slycer Mark Five, right?
Aren't those made exclusively for Ripslinger's race team?
-Are they?
-Yeah. Yeah, they are.
Dusty...
-You set me up.
-Look, I didn't ever want to hurt you.
-Why?
-It's complicated, okay?
You could have gotten me killed out there today.
I really thought that you'd just turn around.
Well, you were wrong.
And I was wrong about you.
Hey, Rip. Thanks for first place.
(GROWLS)
BRENT: Flying low and quick,
Dusty Crophopper is managing to hold on to the top spot.
But current reigning champ, Ripslinger, is just seconds behind him.
This surprise battle for first place
has made Dusty Crophopper the one to watch.
He's become a working-class hero around the globe.
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
ALL: Whoa!
I told you he could do it.
-That's it.
-Wha... Aw!
That was my skyPad, man.
(SCOFFS) A new one's coming out in two weeks.
(WHIMPERING)
SKIPPER: You're really showing them big-time racers a thing or two, huh?
Yeah. We head out across the Pacific tomorrow, Skip.
You were stationed there for a while, right?
-Yeah.
-Got any advice?
Back in '41, during the Battle over Wake Island
the Wrenches ran into serious monsoons
with embedded CBs that could tear your wings right off.
Be careful. And one more thing...
I'm proud of you, Dusty.
Thanks, wingman.
Hey, Dusty, we have a surprise for you.
Oh, oh, oh! You have to let me tell him.
(CHUCKLES) Go ahead, Chug.
Uh... Oh, I know it. It's... It's on the tip of my tongue.
I'll remember.
We're going...
CHUG: We're going...
-to...
-To...
-Mmm...
-Malays...
-Mexico.
-Mexico! That's it!
-We're going to meet you in Mexico.
-Really?
Yep. Tickets are on Sparky and me.
We sold 326 Dusty bobbleheads, 143 antenna balls,
-203 spinner mugs...
-(BLOWING WHISTLE)
And 1,000 whistles. Go, Team Dusterino! Yeah!
You sure you're up for it, Skipper?
You bet. Somebody else is doing the flying.
That's great news, guys. I'll see you in Mexico.
CHUG: Buenas noches!
SPARKY: I'll bring the salsa! Whoo-hoo!
Hey, El Chu, where's the fire?
It is in my soul.
Tonight, I shall win the heart
of Miss Rochelle.
=== (13) A Love Machine ===
(MARIACHI MUSIC PLAYING)
(EL CHUPACABRA WHOOPING) Ugh!
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
(SINGING)
No, no, no. A thousand no's.
(CONTINUES SINGING)
(STOPS SINGING)
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
Dusty, what are you doing?
(PLAYING SOFT LATIN MUSIC)
Low and slow.
Oh...
(SINGING WITH PASSION)
(ALL SINGING)
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
(GIGGLING)
What does that mean?
No idea, but French-Canadian is the language of love in Quebec.
So, it's got to be good.
I'm in your debt, compadre.
If ever you need me, I shall be there.
DUSTY: Compadre. I like that.
You are looking live
at Pudong Shanghai International Airport...
Yep. First place. Not too bad for a farm boy.
Oh, yeah?
Well, first place is for losers.
Can it, moron!
-Ow!
-(LAUGHS)
Now, listen up. It's time to make yourselves useful.
(PANTING)
What happened to you?
That song. It flipped a switch.
ROCHELLE: Oh, my little monster. Come here.
-EL CHUPACABRA: Please! No!
-(KISSING)
She is like a jaguar now.
ROCHELLE: Oh, my little burrito.
EL CHUPACABRA: Be gentle with me!
RACE OFFICAL: (OVER PA) Start your engines.
=== (14) Over the Ocean ===
BRENT: This is our sixth and longest leg.
These racers will need to follow their GPS antennas
because there's a big ocean between here and Mexico.
Ah! (GASPS)
My antenna!
Oh, no! No! No!
What am I going to do?
DUSTY: (BREAKING UP ON RADIO) Last known coordinates,
26 degrees, 31 minutes.
Hawaii, are you there?
Do you read? I am low on fuel.
-(ALARM BEEPING)
-Oh, no!
Oh, boy.
(PANTING) Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Unknown rider, unknown rider. You have entered restricted airspace.
Why haven't you responded to radio contact?
DUSTY: Somebody cut off my antenna.
-BRAVO: Identify yourself.
-I'm Dusty Crophopper.
BRAVO: Roger that.
Bogey has been identified as Crophopper Seven.
I'm running on vapors. I need to land.
What are you doing out here with an empty tank?
I thought I'd refuel in Hawaii, but...
Hawaii is 375 miles southwest of here.
-What?
-Listen, Crophopper.
You better follow us to the boat.
No bingo fields around here.
-"Bingo fields"?
-Places to land.
-The boat?
-The USS Dwight D. Flysenhower.
Bravo, checking in as frag plus one. Check.
-Two.
-Go ahead, Bravo.
Bogey is civilian. Needs emergency fuel.
-Copy that.
-For flying out loud!
That's all I need, a civilian exploding on my deck.
We could rig the barricade, sir.
All engines, ahead flank.
Aye, Captain. All engines ahead flank.
-Rig the barricade.
-Copy that.
Rig the barricade! Chop-chop. Hubba-hubba.
BRAVO: Let's line you up for the barricade.
All you got to do is throttle on back and call the ball
and hopefully end up in the spaghetti.
DUSTY: What? Wait, no, wait! Wait a second!
Guys, I'm not sure I can do this.
I don't see how you have a choice.
Okay. But that runway is moving.
ECHO: We'll set you up on the glide path.
DUSTY: Runways are not supposed to move.
Okay. I'm okay. I'm going to be fine.
-Take it easy.
-Moving runway, moving runway.
-There it is. Here we go.
-BRAVO: Throttle on back.
Maybe if I just came around again.
-Level your wings.
-Easy with it.
-Cut, cut, cut!
-(DUSTY SCREAMING)
Stop!
(ALL CHEERING)
We've got you, Crophopper.
Come on, let's get you fixed up, refueled and back in the race.
You are way behind.
Thanks, guys. You saved my tail out there.
-Victory.
-Victory.
DUSTY: Hey, what is that?
That's the Jolly Wrenches Wall of Fame.
Every flyer, every mission.
=== (15) The Truth About Skipper ===
DUSTY: Mmm... Skipper... Skipper...
Oh. Ha-ha! There he is.
Wait. I don't understand. Why is there only one mission?
Chug, what's all that?
Well, I've never been out of the country. You know, I brought the Commodium.
Whatever you do, don't drink the petrol.
We're only going for two days.
Got to be prepared, right?
Got beachwear, dinner wear, underwear...
DUSTY: (ON RADIO) Skipper? Come in, Skipper.
Dusty! We're heading off to Mexico right now.
Glad you got there safe.
Weather report says a major storm is brewing out there.
I'm not in Mexico. I'm with the Jolly Wrenches.
You're on the Flysenhower?
Hey, I saw the Wall of Fame. They only list one mission for you.
Dusty, if you're not past that storm yet, you need...
That can't be right. It must be a mistake.
Look, you have to get out of there.
You're going to have to fly high.
Is it true?
Listen to me, get above the storm!
-Skipper, is it true?
-It's true!
(GASPS)
It's true.
I only flew one mission.
But all those stories?
Crophopper, we got weather moving in fast.
You've got to take off before it's too late.
I just need a second here.
That's a negative, son.
You don't go now, you don't go at all.
(OVER PA) Be advised, the JTWC has issued a tropical cyclone formation alert
for the northeast Pacific Ocean.
Area of convection is located 500 nautical miles
east-northeast of Hawaii.
Maximum sustained surface winds are currently estimated at...
Report to catapult two.
The cat will take you from zero to 160 knots in two seconds.
DUSTY: Two seconds?
We're going to check your weight and set the steam pressure.
Remember, climb straight ahead once you get airborne.
-Climb straight ahead.
-Get above the storm.
Okay, engine full throttle. Nod to the shooter when you're set.
Go win it for the Wrenches, Dusty.
Volo Pro Veritas!
Head Wind's good. Pressure's good.
Go on cat two.
(DUSTY SCREAMS)
FEMALE REPORTER: Señor Ripslinger, any comment
on the disappearance of Dusty Crophopper?
Dusty was a nice guy who flew the challenge
and pierced the clouds of mediocrity. (SNIFFLES)
We're all going to miss him. Excuse me.
Let's just hope he makes a better boat than a plane.
That's a good one, boss.
(LAUGHING) Oh, yeah, that was pretty good.
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
Señor Dusty has ten times the engine you do.
And 10 times the integrity.
Said the plane with the shiny new propeller.
How much integrity did that one cost you, sweetheart?
Too much.
You used to be a great champion.
How the mighty have fallen.
(GRUNTS IN DISGUST)
You are not even worthy of a cape swish.
Really?
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
=== (16) Dusty Down ===
DUSTY: How can it be only one mission?
SKIPPER: The Battle of Airway.
The raid in Tujunga Harbor. The Aleutians.
The Battle of Wake Island. The Assault on Kunming.
(GASPS) I got to get above the storm!
Whoa!
(SCREAMING)
(GRUNTING)
(GASPS)
Mayday! Mayday! I am going down!
18 degrees north, six minutes, 119...
(GASPING)
(GASPING)
Help!
(HELICOPTER BLADES WHIRRING)
(RADIO CHATTER IN SPANISH)
(ALL CLAMORING)
-DOTTIE: Dusty!
-EL CHUPACABRA: Me Amigo!
SKIPPER: Quick, to the hangar.
Broken wing ribs, twisted gear, bent prop,
and your main spar is cracked bad.
It's over.
One mission?
So much for Volo Pro Veritas.
Can we get a minute alone, please?
You, too, Sparky.
My first patrol as a Jolly Wrench was at Glendal Canal.
My squadron was all rookies. All razor sharp.
I should know.
I trained every single one of them.
It was supposed to be a routine patrol. A milk run.
Look, Skipper, enemy ship two o'clock low, two miles.
-Easy pickings. What do you say?
-Negative, Jigsaw Two.
Our orders are to recon and report back.
Come on, Skip, it will be a turkey shoot.
-JIGSAW THREE: Let's do it, Skipper.
-JIGSAW FOUR: Yeah, come on!
All right. Let's go in for a closer look.
But keep your distance.
Holy Cow! It's the whole enemy fleet!
SKIPPER: It was too late to pull up.
Get out of there, Lucas!
My whole squadron.
Under my command.
After that, I just couldn't bring myself to fly again.
Let me ask you something, Dusty.
If you knew the truth about my past,
would you have asked me to train you?
No.
I'm sorry, Dusty.
=== (17) That's What Friends Do ===
Dusty?
Can you believe it?
He hasn't been straight with me this whole time.
At least you were honest.
You said I wasn't built for this.
(SIGHS) I guess I should have listened to you.
Dusty, if you had listened to me I would never ever forgive myself.
Look, the Skipper may have been wrong for what he did,
but he was right about you.
You're not a crop duster. You're a racer.
And now
the whole world knows it.
Thanks, Dottie.
That means a lot.
I've gone as far as I can go. I'm busted up, look at me.
EL CHUPACABRA: Yes, look at you.
Dusty, I cannot bear the thought of competing without you.
Hey, that's the wing of a T-33 Shooting Star.
When the great Mexican Air Force needed help,
American T-33s came. They did not ask questions.
They did not hesitate. They were there.
Because that is what compadres do.
DUSTY: And what's that?
That is my lunch. Don't touch.
But the wings are yours.
-El Chu, I really appreciate...
-(EL CHUPACABRA SHUSHING)
Silencio.
After all, you helped me with my pursuits of the heart.
Now we are here to help you.
-We?
-Oui.
Good luck tomorrow, Dusty. I am so proud to compete with you.
You're a good egg, Dusty. Look, here's a sat-nav device.
Just in case... (SNIFFLES)
In case you ever find yourself lost, you know, without a...
Without a friend to help you through it.
Thank you, Bulldog.
Here's a flow control valve for you.
How about a starter generator?
It is honor to fly beside you.
Thanks, everyone. Really.
This is fantastic.
Looks like all you need now is a...
A new propeller?
How about a Sky Slycer Mark Five?
Wait, that's your propeller. You could still win the race.
Oh, I intend to, but with my old propeller.
This one didn't really suit me.
But I think you will have a lot better luck with it.
Thanks, Ishani.
Dottie, can you fix me?
Does a PT6A have a multi-stage compressor?
ALL: Uh...
Yes! Yes it does.
All right, you guys, let's get him ready to race.
=== (18) Rebuilding Dusty ===
(BLOWTORCH CRACKLING)
This one's...
CHUG: What?
Hmm.
(INAUDIBLE)
BRENT: We are live from Mexico. And here they come.
This is it, race fans. The final leg back to New York.
Whoa, dude!
-We'll see you in New York.
-Thanks, guys.
(CHUG LAUGHS)
It's dustin' time!
Dusty la vista, baby!
CHUG: You have to hand it to him. He never gives up.
DOTTIE: Come on, Chug, we have a jet to catch.
CHUG: New York City. Finish line, here we come!
Hey. So are you ready to go, Skip?
Probably best if I don't.
What...
Oh. Okay.
Are you sure?
Yeah.
-Dusty!
-He's back.
You got to be kidding me.
-Who's that guy?
-It's the crop duster.
-Another one?
-It's the same one, Knucklehead.
Move aside, idiots.
(RIPSLINGER LAUGHS)
Bolting on a few new parts doesn't change who you are.
(SNIFFS) I can still smell the farm on you.
(LAUGHING)
You know what? I finally get it.
You're afraid of getting beat by a crop duster.
Well, check six, because I'm coming.
And what are you punks looking at?
-Nothing. Nothing.
-Sorry.
We are going to end this, once and for all.
-Yeah, man.
-This is going to be fun.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
BRENT: This one's all about speed and the willingness to give it all.
First to cut the ribbon in New York takes home that trophy and the glory.
Ya!
And we're off as the first flyers take to the air.
I will wait for you at the finish line, hermosa.
No, no, no. I will be waiting for you.
(SPEAKING SPANISH AND FRENCH)
(PURRS)
-OFFICAL: Ya!
-(BOTH KISSING)
=== (19) The Final Leg ===
BRENT: The rest of the field is now off and running.
And though Crophopper did not complete the previous leg,
race officials ruled his radio had been tampered with.
So he'll be allowed to compete.
But with a severe time penalty.
(COUNTING DOWN IN SPANISH)
I've never seen someone come back from this far behind.
It's going to take both horsepower and willpower
to even have a chance.
Good show, Dusty.
-Um, Boss?
-What?
He's here.
Okay, we're out of camera range.
You know what to do.
-(LAUGHS) Hey, farmer.
-Time to plow the fields.
Looks like you've run out of airspace, Crophopper.
(GROANING)
(GROANS) Hey!
-Skipper? Whoa!
-SKIPPER: Dusty, pull up!
Skipper? You're flying!
Oh, you noticed.
Listen, I got Rip. You take care of the other two.
Got it.
SKIPPER: They're on your six, kid. You gotta lose them.
I'm trying.
Skip, I can't shake them.
Pull hard right. I'll break left and take out Rip.
-Use the rocks.
-Roger that!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
(BOTH GROANING)
Yeah!
Oh, that's going to leave a mark. (GROANS)
What?
Say hello to the Warsaw Windmill.
-Whoa! You're crazy!
-(LAUGHS) That's right.
-Dusty! Are you okay?
-Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.
That was pretty good for a crop duster.
(LAUGHS) And not bad for an old-timer who doesn't fly.
Oh yeah? Well, I may be old, but at least I ain't afraid of heights.
-(CHUCKLING) Okay.
-(LAUGHING)
(SKIPPER GROANS)
No!
That's why they call them Sky Slycers!
Oh, no. Skipper, are you okay?
(CHUCKLING) Are you kidding? I'm great.
-But what about your tail?
-I'll live. Go get them!
Go!
COLIN: We're closing in on the final stretch, folks.
BRENT: That's right, Colin.
And ever since they emerged from Deadstick Desert,
Ripslinger has maintained a lead.
ROPER: Any sign of them?
Nothing yet.
-What?
-Hi.
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTING)
Come on, come on, come on.
Not now! Not now!
Come on, come on, come on.
No!
SKIPPER: Tailwinds like nothing you've ever flown.
=== (20) Time to Get Dusted ===
Roger that, Skip.
Don't look down. Don't look down.
(GASPS)
(EXCLAIMING)
(SCREAMS)
Oh, yeah!
(LAUGHING)
(WHOOPING)
Okay, time to eat my dust.
With another win for Ripslinger seeming inevitable...
Wait a second, it's Dusty Crophopper!
-Yes!
-Go!
BRENT: And here they come, down the stretch.
It's going to be close, it's anyone's race.
All right, get my good side, fellas.
What?
DUSTY: Yes!
BRENT: He's done it! He's done it.
Crophopper!
No!
What?
COLIN: From last to first.
From obscurity to immortality,
the racing world will never forget this day.
For the first time, a crop duster
has won the Wings Around the Globe Rally!
EL CHUPACABRA: Yes, Dusty! Ha-ha!
(WHOOPING)
Magnifique, Dusty!
You really kicked his bottom, lad!
All right. Yeah! Now that's how to pass!
You did it!
I couldn't have done it without you, Dottie.
Yeah, I know.
Hey, buddy, great tip about Ripslinger leaning to the cameras. Thanks, Chug.
Hey, anything for my pal.
Well done, Dusty. The world has a new champion.
And so do I.
Thanks, Ishani. For everything.
-Herr Dusty!
-Franz?
-Hoorah!
-What are you doing here?
We came to watch you win the race. You are an inspiration to all of us.
"All of us"?
Yeah. All of us who want to do more than just what we were built for.
(ALL CHEERING)
Whoa! Thanks, guys!
ROPER: Whoo-wee!
Ripstinker. Yeah, that's your name. That's some supersonic sewer sauce.
Man, I thought Vita-stink-a-bunch was bad.
That's got nothing on you.
Ooh! You're just nasty. Nastilicious.
You need to go home and wash up.
-Twice.
-(CHUCKLES)
-Whoa!
-(ALL LAUGHING)
CAR: Who's that guy?
Thanks, Skip.
Don't thank me.
I learned a lot more from you than you ever learned from me.
Attention on deck. Victory!
ALL: Victory!
It's an honor to be here.
Hook them up.
-You ready, wingman?
-Roger that.
An honorary Jolly Wrench. How's that feel, Dusty?
It feels great!
(LAUGHS) Back in the saddle again, eh, Skipper?
Well, they didn't have these fancy toys the last time I did this.
Nothing to it.
They hook you up, you nod to the shooter over there,
and hang on!
SKIPPER: Yeah!
DUSTY: Last one back to Propwash buys!
SKIPPER: Ha-ha! You're on!
(DUSTY WHOOPING)
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
Category:Movie Scripts