Dumb Things I Do/Transcript

* Rebecca Parham: I'm pretty sure adulthood is a lie we tell ourselves. "When you're an adult, you're supposed to have things figured out, you're supposed to know what's going on, you're supposed to be organized responsible and never do anything stupid.". Extra, extra, read all about it. Another adult does something stupid and ruins everything. We all do dumb things, even me. Yes, I know, hard to believe, but oh it's true. Exhibit A, I have medical based phobias. That's not the dumb part. For some reason, I'm fine with just blood by itself but one of the things that does provoke this phobia of mine is hypodermic needles and injections, getting a good old jab in the arm, so naturally I've run into the problem of nearly fainting every single time I need a shot or my blood drawn but I have found a solution and here is the stupid part. In order to not faint while being stuck with a needle, I have to sing. Don't look at me like that! It's either deal with a lifeless body on your floor or listen to some show tunes so as it goes any time I need a shot or my blood drawn, this conversation happens. "Hey, I know this is gonna sound weird, but in order to keep myself from fainting, I have to sing to distract myself."
* Nurse: "Oh, don't worry about it. Do what you have to."
* Rebecca Parham: "Thanks. In sleep he sang to me in dreams he came, that voice which calls to me and speaks my name."
* Nurse: "Wow, You're a really great singer!"
* Rebecca Parham: "Thank you, now please hurry up!" I think the reason this works is because I feel like I'm performing for the person who's drawing my blood and my need to give a good performance actually overpowers my deep-rooted crippling psychological phobia. The show must go on, apparently! Speaking of performances, the other dumb thing I do is, I can't watch performance-based reality TV shows like American Idol or The Voice or America's Got Talent. Every time a new contestant goes up to perform I start stressing out so badly because I know what auditions feel like have your dream right on giving the best performance of your life and the crushing disappointment and devastation when you blow it, I end up putting myself in every single contestant shoes and I freak out for them especially when they mess up and at the end of a long day of work I don't need that kind of stress in my life. I'm trying to relax! I want colorful cartoons and historical dramas, thank you very much!!
* [Anger intensifies]
* Rebecca Parham: Good lord, this video should be renamed "Dumb Things That Stress Me Out". Let's just move on. Yet another dumb thing I do is whenever I'm taking a flight, I have to touch the outside of the airplane before I get on and I honestly don't know why I hear this one is more common than you think and a lot of people do it out of superstition or as a quick prayer for safety but I don't know why I do it. Routine, maybe? Tradition? Because I am never going to be on a plane hitting rough turbulence thinking "Well, we're dead. If I had just touched the outside of the plane, we'd be hunky-dory right now!". No, I'm never gonna think that. Actually, come to think of it, I don't know what I would do if I ever forgot because, I've never forgotten, but I imagine it would go something like this.
* Flight Attendant: "All right, everyone, we're about to close the cabin doors so please be [...]"
* Rebecca Parham: "Wait a minute, I didn't touch the outside of the plane. "
* Flight Attendant: "...or the seat in front of you-"
* Rebecca Parham: "WE CAN'T TAKE OFF!
* Flight Attendant: "Uh, ma'am ma'am ma'am?"
* [Music intensifies]
* Rebecca Parham: Okay, now we can take off."
* [Outro]
* Rebecca Parham: That was actually a lot of fun talking about the dumb things I do. I want to give a special thank you to Nathan from Drawee who voiced the nurse and the flight attendant. We did a really fun video over on the Drawee channel where we had to draw some pretty outlandish superheroes. I'll put a link to the video in the description in all of their social media please check them out over on Drawfee Nathan and Jacob, they are so funny and entertaining and they were such great hosts, so yes, go check them out go, check out the video we made. Thank you guys so much for getting my Draw My Life to the number one spot on trending and thank you so much for tuning in, but now, I gotta tune out. Bye!
Category:Transcripts