Booty Call Phone

In this commercial, Keyz (in the guise of Pat Robertson) sells 700 Club Brand Butt Plugs.
== Script ==
Hey, listeners. Have you been bombarded with spam from sites like reunion.com and classmates.com asking you if you want to get in touch with friends from the past? We all have. While we can't stop the spam from filling your inbox, we can offer you a new product that takes the hassle out of contacting people you have slept with in the past. After all, that is the reason those sites exist. From Awful Show Industries comes...
The Booty Call Phone!
The Booty Call Phone is a breakthrough in cellular technology. Simply use the Booty Call Phone's web interface to type the name of a past sexual partner and hit send. Within minutes, the phone accesses FBI and CIA databases, retrieves the phone number of the requested person based on cross-referencing of physical location history, and dials the number. But despite its name, the Booty Call Phone isn't just for Booty Calls. Use it anytime you want to contact people from your past. You can use it to get in touch with lost relatives and even call people you hate just to harass them. 
(play Clinton 'Family Guy' clip)
That's right folks, you needn't rely on crappy websites to catch a blast from the past. Let the Booty Call Phone be your personal time machine.
The Booty Call Phone!
Hold it to your head, and you might get some tail!
The Booty Call Phone!
Upon purchase, buyer indemnifies Booty Call Phones and Awful Show Industries from all legal actions by the United States government.
== Notes of Interest ==
* The Bill Clinton clip is from the Family Guy episode "Bill and Peter's Bogus Journey".
Category:Faux_Commercials