All or Nothing

Musical guest: Alvin and the Chipmunks
guest star - Lindsay Felton and John Stamos
Main comic - after Henry quits the show for the rest of the year for good
== Quotes ==
Erica: When are you going to stop acting like a child?
Hector: When are you going to stop treating me like a child?
Erica: I'll stop treating you like a child when you start acting like a grown-up.
Hector: I'll start acting like a grown-up when you start--
June: ♪ Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want
So tell me what you want, what you really, really want
I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha)
I wanna really, really, really wanna zigazig ah
Corey: Hey, not now, please. Okay? I need to get ready for dinner with the captain.
June: [gasps] We're having dinner with the captain?
Corey: No, I am. You're staying here. 
Erica: and tonight’s musical guest is three musically inclined chipmunks, Alvin, the mischievous troublemaker, Simon, the smart one, and Theodore, the chubby sweetheart
June: This is so not fair! Not to us, and certainly not to the captain, who I'm sure was really looking forward to dining with me.
June: Sniz and Fondue are not the only ones can take a joke. And unlike Henry, who’s still a pain in the pajamas because he quit for the rest of the year, here’s a letter from him now. 
Henry’s voice: Dear, June. splitting up with you is the thing you’ve done two times. I also quit for the rest of the year 2013. your employers won’t let me use the KaBlam! name. But according to my mental health, I will not be back until my behaviour improves just like the lopes girl
Narrator: Dateline, bakery kitchen, where melty's girl is baking some cupcakes while the others are standing by the oven
Flesh: Do I smell cupcakes? (he opens the oven door, and sees the cupcakes) Oooh, do I ever!
Mayor: Ah-ah. Andrea's making these for her teacher.
Flesh: Ah, say no more.
Quarky: Yum! Don't mind if I do!
Mayor: young lady!
Quarky: Oh, man!
Andrea: Keep your greasy mitts out of there!
Mayor: These are for Andrea's class, until 
Andrea: It's my teacher's birthday.
audience member (Teala): hey everybody!
audience member (Zachary): tonight’s musical guest
audience members (Zachary, Amber and Teala): Alvin... Simon... and Theodore!
(crowd cheers)
DJ: Yeah, in the place to be Chipmunks on the M-I-C "Witch Doctor" 
Everybody, can they do it? 
Can they do it? 
Come on, people, let's get to it 
Let's get to it 
Come on, shake, come on, roll 
Everybody hit the floor 
Come on, shake, come on, roll 
With the Chipmunks, here we go 
Chipmunks: ♪ I told the witch doctor I was in love with you 
I told the witch doctor 
You didn't love me too 
And then the witch doctor 
He told me what to do 
He said: Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
To the ting to the tang 
The wallawalla bingbang 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
Ting tang wallawalla bingbang 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
To the ting to the tang 
The wallawalla bingbang 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
Ting tang wallawalla bingbang 
Yo, DJ, pump this party! 
DJ: Everybody, can they do it? 
Can they do it? -Go! Go! Go! 
Come on, people, let's get to it 
Go! Go! Go! 
Come on, shake, come on, roll 
Everybody hit the floor 
Come on, shake, come on, roll 
With the Chipmunks, here we go 
Alvin! Simon! Theodore! 
Chipmunks: I told the witch doctor 
You didn't love me true 
I told the witch doctor 
You didn't love me nice 
And then the witch doctor 
He gave me this advice 
He said to me: 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
To the ting to the tang 
The wallawalla bingbang 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
Ting tang wallawalla bingbang 
Girl: You've been keeping love from me 
And that's not very smart -
Not very smart 
I went out and found myself someone 
Who'd tell me how to win your heart 
Chipmunks: My friend the witch doctor 
He told me what to say 
My friend the witch doctor 
He told me what to do 
I know that you'll be mine 
When I say this to you 
Oh, baby, baby! 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
To the ting to the tang 
The wallawalla bingbang 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
Ting tang wallawalla bingbang 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
To the ting to the tang 
The wallawalla bingbang 
Ooh to the eeh the ooh the ah ah 
Ting tang wallawalla bingbang
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
Erica: Captain, I'm really sorry about what happened. He's just trying to have some fun.
John Stamos: There's nothing wrong with fun. Our pelican makes sure that everybody has fun. In fact, he circles the ship on a hang glider. It's really quite amusing. However, my number one priority is the passengers' safety, so I simply cannot have anyone else, at risk again.
Corey: Believe me, I understand.
Erica: me too
John Stamos: I'm afraid if one pixel breaks any more of our shipboard rules, I will be forced to make him walk the plank.
Erica: I-I'm sorry, what?
John Stamos: That was a joke.
Erica: Ahh, yeah. Very funny!
John Stamos: Hm, thank you. But in all seriousness, if one pixel breaks any more of our rules, there will be consequences.
Corey: The last thing we want is to not have anybody getting hurt.
Pelican Mascot: Excuse me.
[The pelican mascot bumps into a waiter, causing him to spill steaming hot gravy]
Waiter: Sorry.
Corey: Hot! [heads outside and wipes himself off] Unbelievable. Gravy pants. [sees the pelican mascot nearby] Hey! Hey! Do you have a problem with me?
Pelican Mascot: Oh, you bet I have a problem with you.
Erica: Why?
Pelican Mascot: As if you didn't know.
[The pelican mascot takes his mask off—revealing himself to be none other the hosts' sidekick.]
Erica: What're you doing here?
Jimmy McGee: I'm working.
Erica: This is your job?
Jimmy McGee: Yeah, not too many networks are interesting in hiring the two kids who hosted the show with the Chisholms and the Dicksons
Corey: Look, spilling things—hot things—on me isn't gonna bring any of that stuff back.
Jimmy McGee: You're right. But it's not too late to ruin yours.
Erica: You wanna ruin my life?
Jimmy McGee: Why don't we just start with this vacation. If I see those six pixels break so much as one rule, I'm going straight to John Stamos. You're in my house now! 
[the two hosts gulp, then, a series of flashbacks are shown.]
You're a little monkey. (…For once, try to act normal …) What do you want, a banana? What i do is take your jokes
The apples never rot from the tree.
I think there's something wrong with that girl.
Which part of no more jokes don’t you understand
Hey, you, here's your book.
For once, try to act normal! (Try to act normal!)
Erica: And where's Hector? 
Dawn: Oh, he's with his new pen pal... the Japanese u-picker
Hector: three winners presented including Rugrats, Rocket Power and Hey Arnold, is in danger of growing stale. I'm taking it to strange new places.
June: You're lucky the captain has allowed you one more activity.
Hector: Is it hang gliding or wakeboarding?
June: Nope. Shuffleboard.
Dawn: AWW!
Corey: Sorry, but this is what you get to do. And I get to do something I haven't done in a loooong time: absolutely nothing.
June: Erica approaches her puck, adjusts her stance... looks over at her friends, wonders to herself, that Alvin and the Chipmunks would return to the stage with another song...
[Erica shoves the puck]
June: And... OH! She did it! She absolutely did it, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls! That's going to win her for the rest of her career!
Erica: [laughs] You can make the jokes you want, but not even you can make this interesting.
audience member (Zachary): once again
audience members (Zachary, Amber and Teala): Alvin... Simon... and Theodore!
Chipmunks: ♪ Gotta make a move to a town that's right for me
Town to keep me movin', keep me groovin' with some energy
Well, I talk about it, talk about it, talk about it, talk about it
Talk about, talk about, talk about movin'
Gotta move on
Gotta move on
Gotta move on
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Gotta make a move to a town that's right for me
Town to keep me movin', keep me groovin' with some energy
Well, I talk about it, talk about it, talk about it, talk about it
Talk about, talk about, talk about movin'
Gotta move on
Gotta move on
Gotta move on
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Come on everybody, shake it up and down
Let's get our party on in the Funkytown
With ya hands up high, now take it down low
Come on party people, it's time to go!
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
Won't you take me to Funkytown? 
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
audience member (Teala): that’s the end of our show!
audience member (Amber): but before we go, let’s give a big thanks to our musical guest
audience member (Zachary): Alvin and the Chipmunks!
audience member (Teala): and a big thanks to our very special guest, Lindsay Felton!