Transcripts 2000-06

Transcripts from June 2000 strips.
==June 5==
Panel 1Richard is visible from the shoulders up, grunting and making "HUH HUUUH HUH" noises. His eyes are shut, ears folded back, and body vibrating.Panel 2Richard turns slightly but is continuing to grunt and shudder, with a "NUnnhH! Ga! Almost there!"Panel 3Richard finally cheers with a "YEAH!" as a white spray appears just in front of him.Panel 4Anne and Richard are sitting at a table for two with tablecloth, champagne glasses, and a lit candlestick. Richard pours from the newly-opened champagne bottle into Anne's glass. Richard's is already filled.Richard: I never knoew Champaign was so hard to open!Anne: Technically, cheep stuff from Tesco's is called a 'sparkling white wine'.Richard: What! This is the good stuff!Richard: 9.99 a bottle!Anne: At lest it's a bit more romantic than last week. It's was days before I could sit down properly!
==June 12==
Panel 1Stretch waves down Kingston, who only has the right side of his face visible in panel due to a close-up.Stretch: Hay! Kingston! Wait up!Kingston: F**k off Stretch!Kingston: No matter what you're selling I ain't interested!Panel 2Stretch points at a packet in his hand, looking excited. Kingston gives him a dirty look, unimpressed.Stretch: No man look at this! I got me some grade A Charlie here! Interested?Kingston: Oh yeah I'm interested at how much of that shit came with a lollypop in it!Panel 3Stretch glares at the packet in anger, as though staring it down will help him feel better.Stretch: Man this isn't f**kiing sherbet! I was planning to sell at least a monkey's worth tonight but I can't shift any! This gear is the dog's bollocks so why the hell isn't anyone buying it?Panel 4Stretch gives Kingston the stink eye as Kingston looks up and starts reciting, pointing a finger in the air.Kingston: Well let's see now; maybe it's because you got your nickname "Stretch" for a very good reason and that puff you were dishing out last week made people go blind for a few hours. Maybe your credibility was damaged a tad when the Old Bill pulled you for selling aspirin to school kids or...Stretch" I *GET* the picture!
==June 19==
Guest comic by Marc LeveilleHTML HeaderExams SuckAs you might of guessed I didn't do this weeks strip. This because I left a database assignment too late so it bit me in the arse and with a final exam coming up I didn't really have time to do a strip this week. I got this one off Marc Leveille a week after the last time I took a 'brake' and used guest artists so I sat on it until I needed it. That would be now. Oh yeah if you don't like it, tough! I got a bit pissed at people bitching at ME for Dave Kelley's strip he did me. If you hate it then piss Marc off, not me.
HeaderS.S.D.D by Alan Foreman "art" by Marc Leveille (c)2000 Alan Foreman www.PoisonedMinds.comPanel 1Richard and Anne are in the bedroom, both facing the camera but looking at each other mischievously. Richard is naked(?) and standing behind Anne, holding a camera and touching her ear. Anne is wearing a dressing gown but starting to remove it.Oh, Anne... Did you mention something about another photo-op tonight?Anne: All right, but I'll need your help with the tripod...Panel 2Norman is in the basement, looking disgruntled as he holds a blowtorch over a large rocket that has the logo "Extermi-LAMER" on it.Off-panel (Richard and Anne, extremely floaty word balloon with tears of sweat): MMM... OOH.. OH, YES... HUMMM.... AH!.. UM.. GRRRROWWL... OOOH!!Panel 3Silhouette of Richard and Anne in bed, looking startled as a loud "THOOM!" sound goes off.Panel 4Richard and Anne are in bed with the blankets covering them up to their armpits, both looking angry as Richard faces downwards and shouts.NORMAN!! Keep it quiet down there!! We're trying to sleep!Off-panel (Norman): Sure thing, "Snookums"!
==June 26==
HeaderStandard header but now includes "SAD BUT TRUE..." in the large blank area.Panel 1Al is sitting at a desk with two sheets of paper in front of him.Caption: Okay, picture the scene: It's 2:02pm in room A12 on the 20th June moments away from an exam that I must not fail and for the first time I was nervous about one.Panel 2The camera rotates from panel 1 so Al is now facing the camera and opening a booklet of at least three pages stapled together at the upper left corner.Off-panel (exam administrator): Okay it's now 2:03 so we'll stop at 5:03. You may now turn over your papers and go.Panel 3The camera rotates again for a close-up of Al's face and hands from the left side. He is looking at the second page of the same booklet, at least four pages visible this time.Caption: I shouldn't have worried, as I knew most of the questions.Caption: Hell I only needed to do four out of the nine questions so all I had to do was concentrate.Panel 4Front view of Al, making a cringing expression.Caption: However, 10 minuets into a 3 hour exam...Al (thinking): I *REALLY* need a piss!
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