Sonic

:Not to be confused with the pointless shame.
Sonic is a blue hedgehog, and he's the fastest creature in existence. He can run at several thousand miles per hour, and his legs almost never fall off while he is running. Sonic is also the mascot of SEGA and the dictatorial leader of the Sonic Islands. He steals rings from other people just to give them to Tikal, so they can have a date. Knuckles hates it when Sonic flirts with his sister Tikal.
Sonic hates Amy Rose, because she won't stop stalking him, and he also has a stupid clone named Sonic.EXE, who had who are now on , all of which isn't that scary.
==History==
===Early Life===
Sonic was born on a small island that Nobody really knows about in 1978. He grew up in a small field where a farmer named Red Joe grew his Piranha Plants. This farmer liked hedgehogs, especially when they would shoot spikes all over his face. Some even say he would secretly feed Sonic as a baby. Sonic lived here because his mother was a hippie, so she moved to Mars so she could know what the word peace actually meant (even though Mars is a warrior planet). Sonic's real father was Dr. Eggman, but that's actually a lie that Red Joe told Sonic.
Sonic grew up on this farm, even beginning to call Red Joe "mama". He only did this once because Red smacked him for doing it. But one day, Dr. Eggman came in, and burned down the island. Sonic went hero, and attacked Eggman, taking him down. This started Sonic's rivalry with the Robotnik Family and made him popular with the people on the island.
===SEGA and Taking Power===
:For more, see his shames.
Sonic's popularity skyrocketed even further when SEGA found him, and began to make shames of him. Sonic's shames became so popular, they were able to compete with Mario's shames for several years. However, Sonic's stench was so strong, it actually went through the screen, so it took a while for Sonic's shames to catch on, the most infamous shame was Sonic Blood
Sonic eventually realized just how much potential he had. At only 15 years old, he became president of his home-island. He ruled for about three minutes before he passed a law that made him emperor, and Everybody liked that idea. Sonic was officially a world leader.
===Near Death===
Sonic led his empire through the Videogame War, and is considered one of the greatest leaders of all time. Sonic's last stand was against one of the Upper Counsel of Undefeatables, Marx. Sonic was so fast, he was able to hold his own against Marx for about three seconds before Marx Shoop da Whooped him! Sonic was burned to a crisp.
Many believe Sonic to be dead, and there was even a shame called Bye Bye Sonic made specifically for his death. But this is wrong. Sonic was on life support for an entire year, and having to take one Shawt per minute for that year. This didn't matter, as he was in a coma. But eventually, he woke up, and seeing his setup, ran out of the hospital in under 1 millisecond. He has since returned to being emperor again.
===Silver===
In the future, Sonic turns into Silver because Napoleon Bonaparte is an idiot. Silver then acts like a cooler version of Sonic. Silver then travels back in time, and works with Sonic, not realizing they are the same person. He was last seen in the present acting as an envoy to the (semi) powerful Ducky Empire during the 2nd Ducky War.
==Powers==
* Sonic is the fastest creature alive. If you actually read the entire page, then you would already know he could travel exactly 121,486c. If you didn't see that, you obviously didn't read the entire page. He is very fast.
* He also has spines running along his back, and he can poke people with them. He can make them fluffy instead of sharp, but he usually leaves them sharp. He can also shoot the spines, but they are homing devices that always target Tails.
* Sonic also has a weak yet existent ability to control some humans. This is one of the reasons he took power so easily, and tends to get whatever he wants. Alas, Tails is immune to this for some reason, so Sonic is stuck with him.
* Sonic can also turn into many alternate forms. Nobody knows how many there are, but there are a lot. Whenever Sonic thinks he is not epic enough, he will turn into one of these forms, and then annihilate whatever problem he is up against. His most common form is Super Sonic, but there are many others. There are so many others, it's almost kind of pathetic.
* Sonic also has the ability to curl up into a ball.
* Sonic can also use the Piss Rock to heal himself by pissing.
==Trivia==
*Like the Mario series, Sonic also has a lot of bad shames.
*He is one of the evil masterminds of the Brawl of the Consoles.
*Mario and Sonic duked it out once 10 years after the Videogame War.
*He actually hates Tails more than he hates everyone in the Robotnik Family combined.
*Hollywood made a movie about him, but its trailer was so bad that Sonic fell into a depression and got hooked on Chilidogs.
*Sonic kicked Jeff the Shark's ass one time after the UnPolice called him and offered him money.
== Sub-Pages ==
*Gallery
*Quotes
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