Gory Holed

“Gory Holed”, Way to Die #826, is the fourth death to be featured in “Die-abestic”, which aired on July 11, 2012.
== Plot ==
Bernie is an elderly man who managed to purchase a computer through money from social security checks. Bernie enters an adult chat room and poses as a 24 year old male and talks to an 18 year old blonde female (who is in reality, also another dirty old man). When Bernie asks for pictures, the dial-up modem slows the download down and makes Bernie impatient. Bernie impatiently bounces up and down in his swivel chair (causing a friction between the cylinder parts and the gas also heats up and explodes), waiting for his porn. This causes the cylinder from the chair to rocket up and impale Bernie in his rectum, killing him from massive internal bleeding.
"Bernie couldn't wait for his porn to download...and then he got the shaft... of a fatal upload."
== Interviewees ==
* Pat Contri - Internet Historian
* Gary Kauffman - Engineer