Two By Four/transcript

This is the transcript for "Two By Four"
== Transcript ==
* (episode starts with SpongeBob flipping patties)
* SpongeBob: Ah, work. Who doesn't love work?
* Squidward: Me.
* SpongeBob: Why not?
* Squidward: You.
* (Mr. Krabs walks into the kitchen)
* Mr. Krabs: SPONGEBOB!
* (Mr. Krabs slaps SpongeBob in the back, which shakes him super hard, and then we see his brain and the mini SpongeBobs inside of it (similar to the scene in Squilliam Returns))
* Mini SpongeBob 1: IT'S AN EARTHQUAKE!
* Mini SpongeBob 2: DUCK AND COVER!
* (Panic breaks out across the brain and a bunch of files fly everywhere)
* Mini SpongeBob 3: HELP! I'M FALLING!
* (Mini SpongeBob 3 starts to fall out of the brain)
* Mini SpongeBob 2: TAKE THESE FILES!
* (Mini SpongeBob 3 makes a chain of files back into the brain and the files fall out)
* Mini SpongeBob 3: Oh man, that was close.
* Mini SpongeBob Boss: AAAAHHHH!!
* (We cut back to reality)
* Mr. Krabs: Boyo? You okay?
* SpongeBob: Yeah. Just a little rattled.
* Mr. Krabs: Anyway, the freezer is missing 3 patties!
* SpongeBob: 3? Say what?
* Mr. Krabs: I said, the freezer is missing 3 patties!
* SpongeBob: What's "3"?
* Mr. Krabs: 3 is a basic number! Get the anchors out of your pants and quit fooling!
* SpongeBob: What are the basic numbers? Sorry, I think I forgot.
* Mr. Krabs: Yeesh, i'lll just do it myself.
* (Mr. Krabs walks out)
* SpongeBob: Do any of you out there know the basic numbers?
* (Everybody looks at SpongeBob)
* SpongeBob: Thanks because.. well.. I don't know what they are
* (They all laugh except for Patrick)
* Patrick: I don't get it.
* SpongeBob: Can anybody help me?
* Fred: I guess.
* (Fred goes up to SpongeBob)
* Fred: Zero, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. There.
* SpongeBob: What did you say?
* Fred: I'll have to do it another way.. hmm.. I've got it! A song will help you!
* SpongeBob: Are you sure, Fred?
* Fred: Completely.
* (A tune starts to play)
* Fred: We start off with the number zero! Doesn't start our numbers though, not at all!
* Fred: Now we get to one, and it isn't dumb. It starts our numbers for all of the numbers coming next!
* SpongeBob: Aaah, so Zero and One start it?
* Fred: No!
* (He slaps SpongeBob.)
* SpongeBob: Ow.
* Fred: Only one does, oh man it does! But after one; itttts two! It isn't blue, yeah, but it's after one!
* (Fred knocks over water)
* Fred: Oh, dang it. The floor is wet- TURN THAT MUSIC OFF!
* (the melody stops)
* Fred: You should get it by now, two is after one, three is after two, etc.
* SpongeBob: Alright.
* SpongeBob: One, After, Two, Is, Three, Etc.
* Fred: AW COME ON YOU SIMPLETON!
* SpongeBob: What? I listed them right, did I?
* (Everybody screams NO and goes back to eating.)
* SpongeBob: I have no clue what basic numbers are then.
* Fred: And you'll never know.. ugh, this was a waste of my time.
* (Fred goes back to eating his Krabby Patty)
* END
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