Lard of the Dance

"Lard of the Dance" is the first episode of Season 10 (originally produced for season nine).
==Synopsis==
On the first day back to school from summer break, Lisa meets a girl her age who acts twice her age and wants Lisa and her friends to do the same. Meanwhile, Homer recruits Bart to help him make money off recycling grease.
== Full Story ==
While going back-to-school shopping, Lisa is getting lots of school items, Bart on the other hand is just getting paperclips, rubber bands, and staplers instead of a notebook or pencil saying that everything these days is done on computers. Milhouse spots Lisa and tries to be impressive by gluing back his hair and removing his glasses, however it does not go well. Later that day, Homer learns from Apu that he can sell grease to make a profit. At breakfast, Homer begins frying up various amounts of bacon to use the grease to make money, then plans to hire Bart for his "grease business" (ultimately forcing Bart to quit school). Meanwhile, on the first day back at school, Lisa volunteers to help Alex Whitney, a fashion conscious new student, by showing her around the school. To help her make new friends, Lisa takes Alex to meet Sherri, Terri, Allison Taylor and Janey for lunch in the cafeteria, but then the girls quickly abandon Lisa after rapidly becoming best friends with the newcomer.
Homer and Bart begin their grease business and make 63 cents worth of grease from $27 worth of bacon, much to their disappointment. The two continue their grease business, resuming to drive past Springfield Elementary School where Bart gazes at his former schoolmates playing. The pair then drive to Krusty Burger, where they steal grease from the fryers (and consider taking some from the face of the Squeaky-Voiced Teen working there). While stealing the grease, Homer proceeded to shovel it into the back of Marge Simpson's car, with Bart remarking that Marge is most likely going to kill Homer for this, with Homer retorting that if she didn't want him to do that, she should have hidden her car keys. Before the argument could continue, however, the Acne Grease and Shovel arrive and take the grease and shovel from Homer, as they run the grease (and shovel) racket in Springfield.
Alex convinces Principal Skinner to put on a school dance rather than another event he had organized. Skinner agrees, so Alex and Lisa, accompanied by Sherri, Terri, Janey and Allison visit the mall to purchase party supplies. The girls soon take a detour and begin trying on outfits for the dance, despite Lisa's protests and Alex attempting to convince her it will help her get a date for the dance. The group leave the mall, none speaking to each other. Lisa wears the cocktail dress she bought at the mall, but the boys already have dates even Ralph. Lisa then finds Milhouse getting a wedgie fixed and wants him to take her to the dance, but Milhouse has a date and Lisa tries pressuring him but when she sees her reflection in Milhouse's glasses, she can't do it. Milhouse then pines for her by saying "I'm free next weekend, there's plenty of Milhouse to go around".
Initially, Lisa doesn't want to go to the dance, but after some persuasion from Marge, Lisa plans to go to the dance to take tickets at the door. When Principal Skinner has to leave for a brief and asks Lisa to supervise the dance while he is gone, Lisa's somewhat surprised to see that the boys and girls have separated and are standing on opposite sides of the gym, afraid to approach each other. Alex doesn't understand why this is happening and complains to Lisa that they are acting like kids---Lisa points out that it is because they are kids, and not adults or even teenagers, so they are not ready for matters like school dances and dating. Lisa also adds that she, Alex and the rest of the students shouldn't be in a such a rush grow up and that they should their childhood while they still can.
Bart reveals to Homer that the school kitchen will have an enormous amount of grease. They arrive at the school during the dance to steal it. Homer sneaks into the kitchen and plants a hose in the fryer, sucking the grease into the car, but Groundskeeper Willie observes the pair and attempts to stop them, claiming that the grease is for his retirement. A fight ensues between the two of them after a brief argument regarding Willie's nationality. Homer tries to escape, but Willie grabs his legs and strangles him with the hose sucking the grease. Due to increased pressure the hose explodes, causing grease to fall out of the ventilation shaft into the hall where the dance is being held. A faux-snowball fight using the grease breaks out among the students, and Alex eventually joins in after being told by Lisa to act her own age, saying, "You are so dead." The episode finishes with Lisa throwing a second at Alex and she says, "Ow, there was bacon in that."
== Citations ==
fr:La Graisse antique
pl:Lard of the Dance
pt:A banha do baile
Category:Lisa episodes
Category:Homer episodes
Category:Education-themed episodes
Category:Season premieres
Category:Bart episodes
Category:Episodes featuring guest stars
Category:Principal Skinner episodes
Category:Groundskeeper Willie Episodes
Category:Lisa seeks understanding episodes
Category:Firsts
Category:Agnes Skinner episodes
Category:'Of' Episodes
Category:Written by one-time writers
Category:Directed by Dominic Polcino
Category:First day of school episodes
Category:Episodes where Wendell talks