G.U.C.T. (Grand Unified Conspiracy Theory)

A "Grand Unified Conspiracy Theory" is a worldview wherein reptilians, nordics, the orange, the Green, the greys, the djinn, the light blues, the illuminati, lizardmen, mothmen, bugmen, bigfoot, mermaids, the Ashtar Command, the Washtar Command and all the many other species of aliens, cryptids and hybrids are in control of this Earth and controlling many human beings. Many species are working together, but many aliens are at odds with each other. Some documentary evidence of these different types of species working together for world domination can be found on the You Tube series Illuminati Inc.
A fully integrated convincing GUCT has yet to be put forth by anyone--including David Icke and noted Sack of Shit Richard Hoagland--but what we know for certain is:
* The moon is a hollow monitoring station floating above the Earth
* The Montauk project is capable of sending people back in time with inappropriate footwear
* Larry Sinclair sucks cock like nobody's business
* An MK Ultra super soldier can flip your car over
* Leprechauns kidnapped former Unbelievable Podcast contributor Crystal Delahanty
* You can use a zapper on your face, but it will burn at first
* The pyramids in Egypt were built by aliens and filled with gluten free wheat grain
* The Korendians use Ham Radio
You can see the connections without a picture being drawn, surely. But listening to every episode of The Unbelievable Podcast allows for a fuller understanding of the forces at work in what we laughingly call "our" universe. Once initiated, it is easy to see the alien hands pulling all the strings behind any human endeavor.
One popular GUCT involves a flat Earth controlled mainly by Reptilian weathermen on local news stations working in collusion with The Orange in the shadow government and HAARP to control the ionosphere, therefore the weather, enabling them to activate the chem-trails linked to the fluoride in the water supply and the mercury in all the fish, effectively giving HAARP the power to control human and fish alike! (One-upping Aquaman in this regard).
But there are many many of these GUCTs out there. Share one?
Category:Conspiracies