If we wrote about the RUC the same way they write about their enemies

Popeye, also known as Pop Shogorrath is an evil multidimensional demon overlord that is bent on destroying the multiverse. He was created from an evil satanic ritual where evil demon Albert shits inside Felix's mouth.
The power of Popeye is so powerful that Mike and the Warriors of Light are still fighting him.
The RUC follows him.
== History ==
Nobody knows where Pop Shogorrath originated from but many believe that it was from an evil demonic shitting ritual where an evil demon shits into another's mouth.
There is another theory however, in which he was the snake in Adam and Eve's garden but he ate the apple and then shat into Adam and Eve's mouths, turning them into his evil minions.
Regardless, his lust for power grew to the point where he wants to destroy the entire multiverse and cover it all in darkness and poop. He does this through evil satanic rituals to build an army of evil demons and satanic Homer Simpsons.
== Power ==
As an evil multidimensional being of destruction, Popeye has many powers at his disposal that he uses for evil. He can shoot beams of dark magic and blood beams from his eyes that turn people into demonic minions, for example. Also, he grows more powerful by devouring orphans, which is why he attacks orphanages and kidnaps children to consume.
His blood is also made entirely out of diarrhea, making him immune to disease; rather, he thrives on it, which is why he creates plagues to generate even more power for himself.
He is extremely powerful and must not be underestimated. Mike and the Warriors of Light are able to fight against him, but it is a difficult fight.
== The Story ==
Mike first encountered Popeye as the latter was feasting on the corpses of orphans to fuel his own power. Mike was disgusted by this action and proclaimed that he would defeat this evil demon, drawing his holy sword of light and powering up his Pianist Hand fist. However, Popeye was so powerful that Mike could only fight him to a draw.
Mike would assemble of team of heroes known as the Warriors of Light to defeat this evil demonic demon.
== Death ==
One day, Popeye brought the RUC to massacre an entire city called John's Underpants, kidnapping many orphans in the process to feed to Popeye. Mike was appalled at these atrocities, and brought the Warriors of Light into action once more. While the Warriors of Light were busy holding off the demonic forces, Mike charged straight towards Popeye without his sword, only his trusty Pianist hand. The two engaged in a massive battle, but Mike learned the secret to defeating Popeye from Bob the Builder. Mike held a jalapeno pepper in his pianist hand and thrust it into Popeye's mouth. Popeye could not take the jalapeno pepper and his body fell apart from the sheer pepperyness of the pepper.
With Popeye's death, his demon army dispersed and fled, and the Warriors of Light emerged victorious. Right now, the Warriors of Light are busy trying to clear out the rest of his surviving army.
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