Dynamo's Grandpa

Dynamo's Grandpa, real name Christian Ram Anderson, was the Grandfather of Dynamo and the only person who really tried to steer him straight in life. Married to his wife in 1934 and serving honorably in the Second World War's pacific theater he was a man who's bloodline would end pathetically with the visor wearing menace. He was the one to fight for Dynamo's custody after he found Upgrayedd's cum leaking from the boys pant leg one night. Winning his custody in a long court battle, he soon found that Dynamo's profound stupidity and blatant disregard for all morality was incompatible with the old man. He tried in vain for literal decades to help, but to no avail. When he died in 2007 of a broken heart Dynamo felt nothing really for the man who had saved him, not even attending his funeral. He instead attended the premiere of the movie Surfs Up, where it is said he cried fifteen times and grew an intense lifelong obsession with the film.
Christian rests in peace at Hillside Memorial Park in Los Angeles. It is a Jewish cemetery despite him being a lifelong devoted Catholic, due to Dynamo's haphazard planning of the funeral. His wife joined him when she starved to death in 2023.
 You're lookin at a card holdin Republican
-Christian Ram Anderson
He was eventually added to the pantheon of Dynamism's Gods as the Grandfather and father-figure of The Visored One. He was also a card holding republican after he felt that Truman did not drop enough atomic bombs on Japan in World War II.
== Biography ==
Christian Ram Anderson was born on May 29th, 1914 to Archibald and Gracie Anderson in Des Moines, Iowa. He was the fourth of eleven children, all of whom were born in the same farmhouse. Life was pretty rough for them, despite the affections of his parents, as they were dirt poor farmers who often suffered from tragedy. His oldest brother Roger was drafted into World War I in 1917, and was killed near Ypres. This death had a profound effect on the young Christian and his entire family; he never forgot him, and would always push himself to his mental, physical and spiritual limitations to never let him down. Only a short while later his youngest sister died of Scarlet Fever, and Christian himself would be hit by a case of smallpox which nearly killed him. But it didn't, and this close brush with mortality inspired his lifelong Christian faith, living up to his name strongly.
Life preceded normally enough for the family for a while, with Christian eventually inheriting the farm after the death of his father in 1928. He worked on it for several years, marrying one Barbara Smithey in 1934, even as the great depression began to make the lives of farm workers hell. He struggled hard during these years, and the farm nearly foreclosed. Despite the abysmal polices of Herbert Hoover, Christian tended to vote republican in most elections, being one of like eight people to actually vote for Alf Landon in 1936. How surprised he would be when Alf and his grandson would banish a Dark God millennia later. The entry of the United States into World War II likely saved the farm from destitution, as Christian immediately enlisted for service after the attack on Pearl Harbor, leaving the farm to be run by his surviving brother Clark. With this duel income he managed to keep it open and enrich his family.
Christian in later in life would look back on his war years as the best of his life. Standing at a gargantuan seven feet tall and heavily muscled, he was almost like a real life Captain America. He breezed through boot camp and was sent to the Guadalcanal campaign in 1942. Despite the horrific conditions of the jungle he excelled in the brutal fighting, taking several skulls of slain enemies as trophies. His company tore through their assignments, and Christian was promoted rapidly. You can imagine his disappointment when not only did he not get to invade the home island, they dropped only two atomic bombs on Japan at the end of the war. Realizing he would never achieve his dream of living as a king in a conquered Japan he grew a lifelong hatred of Harry Truman and the democratic party. 
As he was an exceptional soldier Christian was retained in service after demobilization, and promoted to a brigadier general. This served him well when the Korean War began, though was obviously disappointed he didn't engage in any fighting hand to hand. 
Category:Minor Characters
Category:Victims
Category:Heros
Category:Dyna-Pages
Category:Deceased
Category:Major Characters