Meet the Darlings

All this has happened before, and it will all happen again. But this time, it happened in London. It happened on a quiet street in Bloomsbury. That corner house over there is the home of the Darling family, and Peter Pan chose this particular house because there were people and animals who believed in him. There was Mrs. Darling.
In the bathroom of the corner house, there was a French woman with brown hair and hazel eyes, wearing a yellow ball gown and matching pumps. Her name was Belle. And she was busy fixing her hair in front of the mirror for a ball.
"Dimitri dear, do hurry," Belle called out. "We mustn't be late for the party, you know."
Mrs. Darling believed that Peter Pan was the spirit of youth. But Mr. Darling...
In the bedroom, there was a French man of Russian descent with brown hair and eyes, wearing a white dress shirt, black pants, and matching shoes. His name was Dimitri, Belle's husband. And he was looking for his gold cuff links through some drawers.
"Belle, unless I find my cuff links, we don't go to the party," Dimitri called back. "And if we don't go to the party, I can never show my face in St. Petersburg again. And if I can never--"
Unfortunately, he got cut off by bumping his head on the open top drawer.
"OUCH!" cried Dimitri, as he hopped around, holding his head.
Well, Mr. Darling was a practical man. The boys, however, Skippy Rabbit and Piglet, believed Peter Pan was a real person and made him the hero of all their nursery games.
In the nursery, we see two shadows fighting each other with toy swords. One has one in its left paw and a hanger in its right while the other has one in its right hoof.
One of the shadows belonged to a 7-year-old boy bunny wearing a purple nightshirt, black glasses, and a red bandana tied around his head. His name was Skippy Rabbit, Dimitri and Belle's son. And he was the one with the hanger in his right paw and the sword in his left.
The other shadow belonged to a 6-year-old pig with pink skin, wearing a magenta jumpsuit with black hairlined stripes and light yellow footy pajamas underneath. His name was Piglet, Dimitri and Belle's other son and Skippy's little brother. And he was the one with the sword in his right hoof.
"Blast you, Peter Pan!" Skippy said in a scary voice.
Piglet bonked his brother on the head twice with his sword. "Take that!" he cried. Then he and Skippy blocked their toy swords together. "Give up, Captain Hook?" he smirked, "Give up?"
"Never!" called Skippy. Then he opened a drawer that was underneath Piglet's pajama-clad feet with the hanger, and he fell in as Skippy yelled, "I'll teach you to cut off me hand!"
Just about then, a 12-year-old girl with dirty blonde, almost light brown, hair and blue eyes walked in. She was wearing a blue hair ribbon holding her curly ponytail, a frilly pink long-sleeved pajama jacket, matching pants, and matching fuzzy slippers. Her name was Wendy Darling, Dimitri and Belle's daughter and Skippy and Piglet's big sister. She was also carrying a jug.
"Oh no, Skippy," Wendy giggled. "It was the left hand."
"Oh, yes. Thank you, Wendy." said Skippy, as he switched the hanger from his right paw to his left and the sword from his left paw to his right.
Wendy, the eldest, not only believed. She was the supreme authority on Peter Pan and all his marvelous adventures.
While Wendy was in the hallway, she sighed as she talked to four figures, "Oh, Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz. Must we always take that nasty tonic?"
"Yes, you have to." said a voice. The figures walked out to reveal a white kitten named Marie, two orange kittens named Oliver, her boyfriend, and Toulouse, her big brother, and a black kitten named Berlioz. Marie was carrying a tray of three spoons and a bottle of tonic for Wendy, Skippy, and Piglet.
Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz the butlers and nursemaid, being four cats, kept their opinions to themselves.
"We do not!" Berlioz insisted after Marie, Oliver, and Toulouse walked over a pillow.
And they viewed the whole affair with a certain tolerance.
Marie put the tray on a small table. Then Berlioz went over to the pillow to pick it up while Skippy and Piglet were still playing.
"Take that!" Piglet called.
Skippy and Piglet played around, hopping around the beds. "Insolent boy, I'll slash you to ribbons!" Cody yelled.
Berlioz went to the bed and placed the pillow there and fixed up the sheets and Dinah fixed the blanket up. "And I'll cut you to pieces! Aha!" Piglet called.
As he hit Skippy, the bunny yelped in pain. "Ouch! Careful, Piglet, my glasses!"
"I'm sorry, Skippy." Piglet said.
Then Oliver picked up two blocks to the other blocks. Skippy and Piglet hopped back to the bed, messing it up again. "Ah! You'll never leave this ship alive!" Skippy shouted.
So both of them bounced up and down as the pillow fell off again. "Oh yes, I will," Piglet shouted back. "Take that!"
When Oliver placed the ABC on the top, he, Marie, Toulouse, and Berlioz, but they quickly turned as they realized that Oliver had made a mistake. He got them to BAC. "Oops," said Oliver. "I got A and B backwards." So he took the A block, moved the B block, and placed it to the first. He and the others smiled and walked to the tonic for the kids.
"Scuttle me bones, boy! I'll slit your gizzard!" Skippy yelled, as he stabbed as his wooden sword. It ripped through the sheets.
Then Oliver poured on the spoons. "Oh, no, you won't," Piglet cried. "Back! Back! Back, you villain!" As they moved through the sheets, he pushed his wooden sword against Skippy's.
"Insolent pup!" Skippy snarled.
Oliver heard that as he turned, only to get the tonic on his paw. He put it down. "Wicked pirate!" Piglet cried.
"Aha! I got you!" Skippy shouted.
"You didn't either. You never touched me!" Piglet smirked. When Oliver licked it off, he was grossed out by the taste. "Oooh!" Oliver grimaced, "This tonic does taste nasty." "Take that! And that! And that!" When Piglet thrust his sword at Skippy, he got it under his arm as if he made it look like he got him.
Pretending he was dead, Skippy placed a paw over his chest, groaned a fake death groan, and collapsed to the floor. That's when Dimitri came into the nursery.
"Boys, boys. Less noise, please." Dimitri said, without looking where he was going. He knocked the blocks down as Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz heard that, and they had to get them back together as they frowned in annoyance.
Skippy saw him. "Oh, hello, father." he said in a normal voice. But Piglet was still playing.
"You old bilge rat!" Piglet cried out.
Then Dimitri heard that and was insulted. "Wha- wha-what? Now see here, Piglet!"
"Oh, not you, father. You see, he's Peter Pan." Skippy told him.
"And Skippy's Captain Hook." Piglet added.
"Yes, yes, of course. Er, have you seen my cuff links?" Dimitri asked before he bumped Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz, knocking the blocks down again. "Oh, Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, Berlioz, for goodness' sake!" Dimitri shouted, walking past the annoyed kittens, "Where are those cuff links?" Marie smashed the last blocks that were standing with her paw. "Here we go again!" said Berlioz, rolling his eyes.
"Cuff links, father?" asked Skippy.
"Yes. The gold ones." Dimitri answered, still looking around.
"Piglet, the buried treasure," Skippy whispered to his brother. "Where is it?"
"I don't know, Skippy." Piglet said in an innocent way.
"The map then… Where's the treasure map?" Skippy whispered.
"It got lost." Piglet said.
While Dimitri was looking around the bed, he then spotted something under the covers, he was shocked as he shouted, "Good heavens! My shirt front!" He grabbed his shirt front.
"Hurray! You found it! You found it!" Piglet cheered.
Dimitri put it on, as he turned. He didn't know that it got chalk all over his shirt front, the one that looked like the lost map. "Yes, so I have. And hereafter..." As then, Piglet came and pulled his shirt front "Don't paw me, Piglet! This is my last clean..." It was loose as he has saw something shocking and horrifying. He saw a lost map. "No..." He can't say something, only he covered his shirt front shouting, "NO!"
Belle, now wearing yellow opera gloves, came in and said, "Dimitri dear, we really must hurry or we'll be late."
"Belle! Look!" Dimitri said, showing Belle his shirt front.
Belle saw that and was shocked. "Dimitri!"
"It's only chalk, father." Piglet said.
"Why, Piglet..." Belle was about to say something when Skippy cut in.
"It's not his fault. It's in the story. And Wendy said..." Skippy said.
When Dimitri heard what Skippy said, he now knew what was up. "Wendy? Story? I might have known." He walked to the door as he called out, "WENDY?" He crossed his arms and called out even louder. "WENDY!"
Wendy heard him, walked in, and asked, "Yes, father?"
"Would you kindly expl-" Dimitri was about to say something. But Wendy walked by him when she saw the radiance of Belle's dress.
"Oh, mother! you look simply lovely!" Wendy said.
"Thank you, dear." Belle smiled.
Dimitri turned to her in annoyance and said, "Wendy..."
"Just my old gown made over but it did turn out right. And I-" Belle was about to say.
"Belle, if you don't mind, I'd..." Dimitri said, as Wendy turned and saw his shirt front.
"Why, father! What have you done to your shirt?" Wendy asked.
Dimitri couldn't believe what she was saying. "What have I...?" He then turned and screamed in shame. "AAAAAOOOOOOOHHHHHH!"
Belle walked to him with a damp washcloth "Now, Dimitri, really. It comes right off." She washed off the chalk on his shirt front.
"That's no excuse!" He frowned while Wendy, Skippy, and Piglet were putting the toys away. "Wendy, haven't I warned you? Stuffing the boys' heads with a lot of silly stories."
"Oh, but they aren't!" Wendy protested.
"I say they are! Captain Crook! Peter Pirate!" Dimitri said.
"Peter Pan, father." Wendy told him.
"Pan, pirate," Dimitri shouted, trying to put on collar around his neck. "Poppycock!"
"Oh no, father."
"Father, have you ever-"
"You don't understand." The children tried to tell him.
"ABSOLUTE POPPYCOCK!" Dimitri shouted, finally getting the collar together. "And let me tell you, this ridiculous..."
"Now, Dimitri..." Belle said, about to do his white bow tie.
"Now, Dimitri! Now, Dimitri!" He repeated of what Belle said, while Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz were almost done helping Marie put the blocks back up. But they stopped to listen. "WELL, 'NOW, DIMITRI' WILL HAVE HIS SAY!" He put it on himself, only to make a furious tangle.
"Please, dear." Belle said, fixing his bowtie neatly.
"Belle, the child's growing up," As when Marie picked up two more blocks, she listened very carefully. "It's high time she had a room of her own!" He pointed at the hall as it shocked them all.
"Father!" Wendy gasped.
"Dimitri!" Belle gasped.
"What?!" Skippy gasped.
"No!" Piglet gasped.
Marie dropped all the blocks while she, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz gasped in shock and couldn't believe what they were hearing and what Dimitri was doing. "I mean it! Young lady, this is your last night in the nursery!" he said, as Wendy lowered her head in sadness. "And that's my last word on the matter!" He walked away, only to nearly stomp on the four kittens and tried to get out of the way. Dimitri couldn't move around and was ready to fall. And he was losing his steps!
The kittens moved away, as they fully stopped. But they nearly knocked the blocks again because Dimitri bumped into them and knocked them down. Now they must move away before it happens. But Marie stepped the wagon, rolled back, and fell as Dimitri stepped on it and rolled around here. "NO!" And when the kittens were rolling by, the wagon made a tear in the rug, and Dimitri was sent flying as he yelled, "NO!" And with a large crash, he fell into the dresser, knocking the toys down. Wendy, Skippy, Piglet, and Belle were shocked that Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz were against the wall.
As for Dimitri, he was on the floor in pain, and last of the toys fell on his head, the last was the jack-in-the-box, and up popped the jack, as it stood on his head, which made Dimitri mad and annoyed.
"Oh!" Wendy, Skippy, Piglet, and Belle all said together. Dimitri heard them, and knew that they saw him get hurt, and caring of him. So he closed his eyes and waited for them. But suddenly, they ran past him, which made Dimitri open his widened eyes in shock. As they ran to the four kittens, but Dimitri.
"Poor Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz." They said together again.
Dimitri couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Poor Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz?" Now he was very angry as he hopped up on his feet when he stomped up and shouted, "This is the last straw!" He pointed his finger out the door shouting, "OUT! OUT, I SAY!"
Piglet was hugging the kittens. "No, father, no!" Piglet pleaded.
Dimitri grabbed Berlioz by the tail while he, Marie, Oliver, and Toulouse were still hugging each other and shouted, "YES! There'll be no more cats for butlers or nursemaids in this house!" Piglet grabbed Marie's tail. But Belle stopped him by picking him up as Dimitri was dragging Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz out the room.
Piglet started to cry as he waved to his friends. "Goodbye, Marie. Goodbye, Oliver. Goodbye, Toulouse. Goodbye, Berlioz."
"Goodbye, Cody!" Toulouse said cheerfully, as he, Marie, Oliver, and Berlioz waved goodbye back. As Dimitri walked out to the back, he muttered to himself, "Poor Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz. Oh yes, poor Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz. But poor father? Oh, no." He let go of Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz and looked for some ropes, and couldn't find any. "Blast it! Where are those ropes?" He turned as he saw Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz holding four ropes in their mouths. Dimitri walked to them and said, "Oh, thank you." As he was tying the ropes to Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz's collars, the kittens gave him sad looks. "Oh, boy!" sighed Oliver. Dimitri saw that and couldn't bear the sight. "Oh, dash it all, you four. D-Don't look at me like that."
He walked to the fountain and filled up Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz's dishes. He picked them up and filled them more. "It's nothing personal. It's just that- Well, you're not really a nurse or butlers at all You're… Well, a four cats. And the children aren't kittens, they're a human, a bunny, and a piglet. But Edmond's just a kitten." He placed the water dishes near Dinah, Snipes, Peepers, and Patou. "And sooner or later, Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz, people, bunnies, and piglets have to grow up." He pet Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz's heads.
Inside the house, the kids are in their beds, as Belle knew that Dimitri didn't mean to do that to Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz.
Wendy looked depressed. "But mother, I don't want to grow up." she pleaded.
"Now dear," Belle said, as she kissed her on the forehead and covered her up with a dark red blanket. "Don't worry about it anymore tonight."
"He called Peter Pan 'absolute poppycock'." Skippy said to himself after what his father had said.
"I'm sure he didn't mean it, Skippy," Belle said, as she removed the glasses from his eyes and bandana from his head. "Father was just upset."
As for Piglet, he had tears running down his whiskers. "Poor Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz," he sniffled. "out there all alone."
"No more tears, Piglet. It's a warm night. They'll be all right." Belle said, as she covered him up with a blue blanket, kissed his forehead, and left.
Then Piglet remembered something. "Mother?" he asked.
Belle turned around and asked, "What is it, dear?"
"Buried treasure." Piglet had the cuff links that Dimitri was looking for, and he gave them to Belle.
"Now, children, don't judge your father too harshly. After all, he really loves you very much." She walked to the window door, and was about to lock it up.
But Wendy stopped her as she said, "Oh don't lock it, mother. He might come back."
"He?" Belle asked in a puzzled way.
"Yes, Peter Pan. You see, I found something that belongs to him." Wendy said, as she lay down.
"Oh, and what's that?" asked Belle.
She yawned and said, "His shadow."
"Shadow?" Belle asked, very surprised.
"Mm-hmm. Marie, Oliver, Toulouse, and Berlioz had it, but I-I took it away." Wendy said, as she drifted off to sleep.
"Oh? Yes, of course. Good night, dear." Belle said, as she turned off the light, walked out, and left for the party.
Category:Fan Fiction
Category:Peter Pan
Category:Peter Pan parodies