Provisionally Perpetual Beetle Battle!

Provisionally Perpetual Beetle Battle! is an Event Quest during the Arataki Blazing Armor Beetle Battle Boot Camp Event.
==Steps==
# Fight Calamitous Colossus Count Crushmore
# Talk to Arataki Itto and company
==Dialogue==
;(Talk to "Calamitous Colossus Count Crushmore" Guoba)
: : Hey! Good to see everyone! How's it going? Having fun?
: Paimon: Xiangling, Guoba! You finally made it! Well certainly having a blast.
: Arataki Itto: The day has finally come!
: Arataki Itto: Guoba-san! I've been training hard at the Arataki Blazing Armor Beetle Battle Boot Camp, and now I wanna show you just how far I've come! ...Uh, and Crimson Staff too!
: Arataki Itto: If my progress satisfies you, then please, teach me! Show me the way to communicate with Crimson Staff, Crystal Tornado, and all the shelled organisms of this world!
: Arataki Itto: Do that, and I swear, once I become the reigning champion of the beetle-fighting world, I will build a mighty statue in your image at the Arataki Gang's beetle-fighting headquarters!
: : ♪~
: Arataki Itto: What the...! Guoba-san got a brand new Onikabuto?
: Paimon: That does not look normal!
: Grandmaster Hanakado: It appears to be not a typical Onikabuto shell, but one built of resilient wood... Is it wearing a suit of armor?
: Yanfei: We told Granny all about your Onikabuto boot camp. It really piqued her interest when she heard that Guoba was getting a disciple...
: Yanfei: As it turned out, a friend of hers had made her a whole bunch of gardening and landscaping machines to look after the Silk Flowers on the terrace. They're called Bloom Pruners.
: Count Crushmore's Companion God of Cookery: The Bloom Pruner can transform into the shape of any creature to blend into its environment. Squirrels, Butterflies, Finches, you name it. And of course, Onikabuto too.
: Count Crushmore's Companion God of Cookery: So Master gave Guoba a Bloom Pruner and got it to take the form of an Onikabuto so it can battle against you.
: Paimon: ...That's pretty hi-tech for a gardening appliance.
: Paimon: Xiangling's master is Madame Ping, so Madame Ping's friend... Aha! Of course!
: Remind me who that is again?
: Zip it! Don't spoil it!
: Arataki Itto: No machine can compare to a real, live Onikabuto warrior! Did Guoba-san pick a dumbed-down enemy on purpose so we can showcase all our awesome skills?
: Grandmaster Hanakado: You may be wise to temper your optimism, Oni King... My beetle senses are failing to detect this Onikabuto's might. Or perhaps... it's too profound for me to fathom.
: Arataki Itto: Eh, it's not even alive. There's nothing for you to sense.
: Arataki Itto: Uhh anyway, Guoba-san may possess limitless power, but a warrior needs to be one with his weapon. The bond between Onikabuto and trainer is forged through blood, sweat, and tears, not wood, mesh, and gears! Crimson Staff and I are like glove and fist.
: Arataki Itto: Let's get this duel going. It's time for Guoba-san to witness my true potential once and for all!
: Calamitous Colossus Count Crushmore: ♪...
;(Defeat Calamitous Colossus Count Crushmore)
: Paimon: made short work of the Bloom Pruner!
: Arataki Itto: I won! Victory is mine! With my trusty Crimson Staff, I have defeated the 
: Arataki Itto: Alrighty then... Hoo-hoo, the moment I've been waiting for!
: Arataki Itto: Ahem... Guoba-san, if I have earned your recognition, I humbly ask you to teach me the ways of shelled-organism communication...
: Guoba: ♪~
: Arataki Itto: ...Huh? Guoba-san, you look... pleased? But you just lost to me in battle...
: Arataki Itto: Does this mean you're... proud of me for my swift progress?
: Arataki Itto: Aw, shucks, I dunno what to say! Hahahahaha, you're too kind, Guoba-san! ...Ah, you're just being modest, I know you were going easy on me...
: Yanfei: It looks like Guoba's all warmed up now. The Bloom Pruner is ready to operate at full power.
: Xiangling: Guoba, remember the plan? In this round, we wanna increase the Bloom Pruner's power output from a tenth of a percent to one percent, okay?
: Xiangling: Any higher, and you'll risk knocking Itto's Onikabuto out cold.
: Guoba: ♪!
: Paimon: Okay, there it is. Paimon knew something was up.
: What? A tenth of a percent!?
: That's nothing!
: Grandmaster Hanakado: As I feared... We've barely scratched the surface...
: Arataki Itto: Wait! Hold on a minute!
: Arataki Itto: A tenth of one percent? As in... zero-point-one percent? As in... one one-thousandth!?
: Arataki Itto: You've got... You've gotta be kidding me! All that... was just one ONE-THOUSANDTH of its top power?
: Guoba: ♪?
: Yanfei: Guoba's a little confused. You did say you wanted to train your Onikabuto to defeat Crystal Tornado, correct?
: Xiangling: I thought it would go without saying given the size... The Bloom Pruner has to shift rocks the size of casserole dishes, so obviously it has to be pretty strong.
: Xiangling: Even then, Crystal Tornado is bigger still... It dwarfs me and Guoba, and it's even taller than you!
: Arataki Itto: That's impossible... If we were talking twice as strong as the last fight, I think I'd have a shot. Ten times as strong, and we're already looking at losing most, if not all, of the time...
: Arataki Itto: But a thousand times stronger? Who am I kidding... It's hopeless!
: Arataki Itto: ...
:;(Itto has a flashback)
: Paimon: "When your tactics fail, you have to change your point of view. In our journeys far and wide, we often have to think on our feet!"
: Paimon: "Clinging to old methods can never solve the problem, no matter how hard you try!"
:;(The flashback ends)
: Arataki Itto: ...Of course, Guoba-san! This is what you've been trying to tell me all along!
: Arataki Itto: I gotta study mechanics! Then build a suit of armor for Crimson Staff that'll take his abilities to a whole new level!
: Arataki Itto: Or maybe... Heck, I could build a bigger, stronger, mechanical Onikabuto! Piloted by Crimson Staff under my direction!
: Guoba: !?
: Paimon: An Onikabuto piloting a mechanical Onikabuto? How do you expect to pull that off? And does that even still count as a beetle battle?
: Dare to dream!
: I believe in Itto!
: Arataki Itto: Seeing the power of Bloom Pruner has made me realize something... There's a natural limit to Onikabuto's strength.
: Arataki Itto: People have tried to tell me this before. Shinobu, the grandmaster... especially Skycleaving White-Iron Lavender Melon. Admitting defeat is shameful, but not even trying to mix up your tactics one time — that's just plain stupid!
: Arataki Itto: Guoba-san has shown me a new path: Mechanically modified Onikabuto!
: Arataki Itto: With this new technique in my arsenal, size will be no obstacle to me and my valiant beetle warriors as we set out to beat Crystal Tornado once and for all!
: Guoba: ♪♪?
: Yanfei: Heh... Looks like Guoba's not too sure about all that...
: Xiangling: Mechanics, huh? Hmm, I'd have to get my master to see if her friend would be willing to help. She's the expert...
: Arataki Itto: Did you say expert!? Please, Guoba-san, Chef-sama, my savior! Introduce me!
: Kuki Shinobu: Uh-huh...?
: Kuki Shinobu: Thinking of becoming the second Arataki Gang member to study in Liyue are you, Boss?
: Arataki Itto: Shinobu!? When'd you get back?
: Kuki Shinobu: Time's up. We spent our last Mora on these boat tickets, and if we don't get to the harbor pronto, they'll go to waste.
: Arataki Itto: But, but, but... Gimme a minute, okay? We're in the middle of an extremely important discussion here!
: Kuki Shinobu: Yeah, I heard.
: Kuki Shinobu: I was actually very pleased to hear the suggestion of you doing some sort of studying coming out of your own mouth. I have some relevant experience, so I can write a little booklet to get you started.
: Kuki Shinobu: But unfortunately, studying in Liyue is very expensive. The Arataki Gang's typical expenditures are a drop in the ocean by comparison. So what do you intend to do about it?
: Arataki Itto: It'll be fine! I'll just, uhhhh... I'll work like a horse when I get back to Inazuma!
: Arataki Itto: I know what I'm getting into here, alright? I got it all planned out in my head. It's not like I've never gotten paid work before. Soon as I get earnin', we'll all have cash for the burnin', haha!
: Arataki Itto: And don't think for one second I'll be abandoning you or the rest of the Arataki Gang neither! I ain't the kind of head honcho that runs off to go study and leaves his gang behind!
: Arataki Itto: If we're gonna study, we do it as a team! Once I've got enough Mora for everyone's tuition fees, the whole Arataki Gang is coming to Liyue! We'll study together, learn some epic new skills together, and come out the other side as the stronger, smarter Invincible Arataki Gang!
: Kuki Shinobu: You're saying all of the right things... Who are you, and what have you done with Boss?
: Paimon: were some bold words. You'd better make sure you follow through!
: Arataki Itto is a man of his word!
: Don't rely on someone else when you can do it yourself!
: Arataki Itto: Hehehe! Of course I, uh, still need to iron out some deets in terms of what kind of work I can get and how much I can rake in per day...
: Grandmaster Hanakado: In that case, Oni King... I'll stay here in Liyue. Firstly, this will enable me to follow up with Chef-sama and discuss our study plans in detail.
: Grandmaster Hanakado: Secondly, now that word of the Arataki Blazing Armor Beetle Battle Boot Camp has begun to spread, I'll be able to scout for talented warriors and continue optimizing the Onikabuto training diet.
: Grandmaster Hanakado: Also, if the Oni King's Right Hand and Skycleaving White-Iron Lavender Melon wish to continue battling, or analyze the battles so far, I'll be here to support them.
: Arataki Itto: Awesome! Good thinking, grandmaster!
: Arataki Itto: Okay, standard procedure applies — I'll let your grandpops know what you're up to so he won't worry about you.
: Arataki Itto: Hoo-hoo, man, I am so pumped to see what you'll have for us next time I see you!
: Xiangling: I do need to make one thing clear, though. I can't promise that we'll be able to talk an adeptus into taking you on as students. Yanfei and I will do our best, but we'll just have to see how it goes.
: Grandmaster Hanakado: The great master of whom you speak boasts a skill others can only dream of — their pride and prestige don't faze us! The important thing is that I, on behalf of the Oni King and the Arataki Gang, can find a way to show them we're serious and sincere in our quest to master the mechanical arts...
: Grandmaster Hanakado: So I'll need to do some research to find out what kind of gift we should offer if we are to be seen as worthy of learning the mysteries behind the manufacture of the Bloom Pruner.
: Kuki Shinobu: Boss, we gotta leave right now, or we're not gonna make it in time.
: Arataki Itto: *sigh* Alright, I guess this is it...
: Kuki Shinobu: , Paimon, Yanfei senpai, Miss Xiangliang , Guoba... You've all been a huge help to Boss with this beetle battle event. I really can't thank you enough...
: Kuki Shinobu: Please take this as a token of my gratitude. I hope you can find some use for it in your future endeavors.
: Paimon: Wow, you got us a gift! ...Thanks, Shinobu. You're so thoughtful!
: Woohoo!
: Freebies for the win!
: Arataki Itto: The time has come... Adios, compadre. See ya, Skycleaving White-Iron Lavender Melon. Goodbye, Guoba-san and Chef-sama... and farewell, my savior!
: Arataki Itto: I'll be back real soon, I promise! We'll meet again!
: Guoba: ♪♫♩♪♬~
: Paimon: Don't make promises you can't keep, 
: Paimon: It's good to have ambitions, but don't let yourself get carried away in the heat of the moment. Do what Shinobu tells you, be realistic about what you can achieve, and make sure you pace yourself!
: Paimon: ...But of course, if everything works out, Paimon can't wait to see Crimson Staff driving a GINORMOUS mechanical Onikabuto the next time we meet!
:"Crystal Tornado": ...
:"Crystal Tornado": ?
==Other Languages==
==Change History==
pt-br:Batalha de Besouros Provisoriamente Perpétua!
ru:Бесконечный бой жуков!