Congress

Technically the legislative body of the United States government. In reality a federal welfare program for a limited number of lawyers good enough to get money from people but not good enough to find a real job. The main purpose of a congressman, be it the representative or senator is to milk the American people of as much money as possible while never doing any useful work. Indeed when they actually do anything it is usually harmful to said American people.
A congress critter will cut needed spending to the bone while leaving all pork and cooperate welfare untouched. After all they are really representing the corporate contributors to their endless campaigns, not the goobers that vote and think it means something. The most important thing they do, in their view, is to keep the Federal gravy train running right into their own pockets.
META: Congress Critters are occasionally seen as characters in game. The GM doesn't mangle enough of them for cathartic release.
==Noble Obligation==
This is coming. The Administration has had the oath of noble Obligation laid on it. The Congress critters are twisting like snakes in a vice to avoid this. Bills, lawsuits, speeches on how evil being held responsible is, anything but take that awful, awful Oath. Time with family is looking good to the older or more crooked members.
==Crooks & Liars (or the Honorable Members)==
This list is not complete and only lightly informed by reality. They get added as it comes up.
===House===
*Arkansas 4th District -- Bartholomew (Batty) Pile -- Team Red -- Team Red reactionary. Noted as dumb as a box of hammers and flogging Jebus like a rented mule.
*California 2th District -- David McNamara -- Team Blue -- Team Purple cracked the Team Red hold. Get on those coat tails and ride. Team Blue has more money we can win this. No real message. He is getting into the Family business.
*California 12th District -- Nancy Petard -- Team Blue -- Current Speaker of the House and totally insufferable.
*California 37th District -- Michelle Martin -- Team Blue -- New face California State Assembly.uuntrusted.
*California 48th District -- Juan Prieto -- Team Blue -- Apparently working on a polygamous relationship. It's San Diego, they will not care.
*Florida 3rd District -- Candice Franks -- Team Blue -- A Middle aged woman that hates corporate overreach into the laws of the land.
*Georgia 1th District -- 'Sandra Fourwinde -- Team Blue -- A well centered unflappable woman. She is not talking trash, she is talking what I would like to do in Congress. Talking real support for real families, not some idealized and unaccountable "Family Values".
*Georgia 11th District -- Candice Mayland -- Team Blue -- A smart woman with strong liberal progressive chops. Won a vicious campaign.
*Kansas 3rd District -- Simon Farrel -- Team Blue -- Ran against Team Red ignorance and Buttkics poisoned the well for his party. not trusted 
*Louisiana 1st District -- Steve Scarlise -- Team Red, Minority Whip. A solid team Red player down the line. My party said it it cannot be stupid.
*Louisiana 4th District -- Mick Jameson -- Team Red, Outed as a Cretin Nationalist when he got punched in the face. He stays quiet.
*Michigan 4th district -- Mary Martin -- Team Blue -- 2016 New face with the retirement of Lodge. She turned a traditionally Red district. Nothing succeeds like success. Not trusted. 
*Michigan 14th District -- John Conem -- Team Blue -- Yellow dog Liberal. Took over Chairman of Ways and Means. Openly for rights and fiscal common sense unless the pork lands in his district. untrusted.
*Missouri 4th District -- Vicky Hartzler -- Team Scarlet -- Well seated conservative.
*Missouri 9th District -- Anna Johnson -- Team Blue -- Black woman running on real family values. Add that Luckemeyer had a hell of a time getting his technology to work. not trusted. 
*Montana 1st (and only) District -- Greg Giantfootte -- Team Red -- Self identified as a Hunanist and racist. Known for trying to limit rights for those that are not Human.
*Tennessee 3rd District -- Chuck Fletchhmann -- Team Red -- Heavy in the pocket of the neocons. Waves religion with the flag and mentions Jebus every other paragraph. Targeted for replacement soon. Untrusted
*Tennessee 6th District -- Diane Negro -- Team Scarlet -- Family values conservative, not the religious right version. Protecting post natal children, education, the effective kind. A team Red defector. Not trusted
*Texas 1st District -- Randy Wheeler -- Team Purple -- Paleo Conservative, that replaced Dumas in 2018. Dumas' Hobgoblinness hurt him as his lack of empathy and generosity really came out in his last term. Wheeler is an unknown quantity. He seems to be a Purple in Luthor's camp. Not trusted
*Texas 13th District -- Mac Thronbush -- Team Scarlet -- A self proclaimed paelo-conservative that doesn't like religion in his politics. A Team Red defector while in office. Untrusted
*Texas 21st District -- George Jones -- Team Purple -- Lamer Smith was another one for whom technology did not work. Not trusted''
*Texas 22 District -- Cory Mullon -- Team Blue -- With forced redistricting under fair rules Red lost another district. And the former critter was an Ork. 
*Wisconsin 1st District -- Paul Whinen -- Team Red -- House Minority Leader. House committee for never learning.
===Senate===
*Arizona Senator -- Jon McCane -- Team Scarlet -- 2019-2024 -- Cured of brain cancer still going strong. He has become a Magic advocate since his own fatal cancer was cured. One of the issues that caused his break with Team Red. A rare politician with a strong ethical streak, war veteran, Vietnam. Semi Trusted
*Arkansas Senator -- Mark Cryer -- Team Blue -- 2017-2022 -- Was Attorney General of Arkansas from 1999 to 2003. untrusted 
*Arkansas Senator -- Tom Linen -- Team Red -- 2015-2020 -- Former US Representative, former Ranger. Not a party animal. Has voted against the Team Red line...occasionally. Was staunchly against the Guaranteed Income act of 2015.
*California Senator -- George Takone -- Team Blue -- 2013-2018 Former LA councilman. Active in gay rights. A voice that has been called an unfair advantage. not trusted''
*California Senator -- Paul Clay -- Team Blue -- 2015-2020 -- Strong Team Blue chops. With the strong liberal bias in the general California population Clay landed a decisive victory. 
*Georgia Senator -- John “Johnny” Isakson -- Team Red -- 2017-2022' -- Isakson is a rank-and-file Team Reder. Positions himself for the good 'o boy vote. untrusted.''
*Georgia Senator -- Randy Cox -- Team Purple -- 2015-2020 -- Good ol' boy with a brain from Blue Ridge. Sick of crooked pols and ignorant hicks proud of it calling it religion. "It ain't religion, it's just stupid." A surprise dark horse. Team Red is looking for their jaw. semi trusted
*Kansas Senator -- Jerry Moran -- Team Red -- 2019-2024 -- A good redder prepared to be a roadblock to progress what ever it might be. Voted yes on the keep the kids ignorant bill (AKA Religious freedom) untrusted
*Kansas Senator -- Pat Floberts -- Team Red -- Being the dead elephant in the room since 1997 and showing no sign of change. untrusted
*Kentucky Senator -- Stan Parker -- Team Red --2021-2022 -- The whitest white boy that ever whited. A replacement for the retiring Rand Peter. A nice safe Team Red player. Known to be anti, well everything Team Red is anti about. A firm Evangelical and member of the Coffee Caucus. Suspected of being secretly Maroon. 
*Louisiana Senator -- Louis Randal Smith -- Team Purple -- 2014-2020 -- The days of corrupt business as usual are over. A proponent of ARM. 
*Louisiana Senator -- Candice Deveaux -- Team Purple -- 2017-2022 Vittler was a victim of the Purple Rash spreading through Louisiana Candice is a shrill rights and responsibility Purple. She is from New Orleans Not trusted.
*Massachusetts Senator -- Elizabeth Warren -- Team Blue -- 2019-2024 First female Senator from Massachusetts. Still had principles, we see how long that lasts.
*Massachusetts Senator -- Ed Malarky -- Team Blue 2015-2020 Rode the Team Blue coatalls.
*Michigan Senator -- Jerry Peters -- Team Blue -- 2015-2020 -- Good solid team blue player that is riding the coattails like he means it.
*Michigan Senator -- Debbie Stabunow -- Team Blue. 2019-2024 Chairman Agriculture Committee, principle in the cash for clunkers fiasco. untrusted 
*Minnesota Senator -- Tina Smith -- Team Blue. 2017-2022 Replaced Finken in 2018 She continued the ball of thorns in their gut since treatment. 
*Montana Senator -- Byrion T. Rawlings -- Team Purple -- 2019-2024 -- A raw boned, red necked rancher that has a low bullshit tolerance. In the 1980s he shot down a UFO with a nitro express. Caught the buggers red handed at cattle mutilation. This got him "in the know". This has served B-13 well as Mr Rawlings is now a US Senator. Rawlings might have a red neck, but he also has a brain, and knows how to use it. B-13 
*North Dakota Senator -- Mary Porcrin -- Team Red -- 2015-2020 Strong Them versus Us type. Heavy grubber for pork. untrusted 
*Pennsylvania Senator -- Paul Rand -- Team Scarlet -- 2015-2020 -- Paelo Conservative and founding member of Team Scarlet.
*Texas Senator -- Billy Bob Hawkins -- Team Red -- 2015-2020 -- First politician to hire an Ane to get him about. Fairly open minded and practical. semi trusted 
*Texas Senator -- Rafael Edward "Ted" Crude -- Team Red -- 2019-2024 -- The junior Senator from Texas. Elected in 2009, he is the first Cuban American or Latino to hold the office of US Senator from Texas. Crude is a member of the Coffee Caucus. anti know, anti trusted
Category:Politics
Category:Crime
Category:USA Congress