Wings Of Fire but it’s D&D

“BAD DICE YOU GET TIME OUT!”
-Qibli
Have you ever wondered what would happen if the Arc 2 main characters played Dungeons & Dragons? No? WELL I DIDN’T ASK YOU GOSH-
*Technical Difficulties*
This is somewhat a spoof, but also semi-serious so I don’t know anymore. Is it a AU???? Basically, the Arc 2 gang are the players, playing characters inside the world that Fatespeaker, the DM, has created.
TW: Mild violence, some minor mentions of alcoholic drinks
Text in italics are characters talking as their D&D characters, or Fatespeaker narrating the world.
== The Gang ==
Fatespeaker — Dungeon Master, lost her sanity a long time ago.
Qibli — Playing a bard named “Hobo Swaggins”
Winter — Playing a super-edgy rogue named “Vetur”
Moonwatcher — Playing a cleric named “Crystalsight”
Peril — Playing a warlock named “Arson” who’s weirdly obsessed with mud…
Turtle — Playing a monk named “uhhh…Blobfish” (said the first name that came into his head)
Kinkajou — Playing a paladin named “Awesomeface McSparkles”
== The Game ==
Fatespeaker sits at her screen, rattling dice while she awaits her players.
Kinkajou is first to arrive, bringing a bag of sugar for snacks and in full costume.
Kinkajou: WOOOOOOOOO I am HYPED!
Fatespeaker: So, Kinkajou, have you ever played D&D before?
Kinkajou: What’s- OH is that like the secret name for Dungeons & Dragons?
Fatespeaker: Uh, no, it’s just an abbreviation. But it’s SUPER fun! I can’t wait to DM you guys! You seem like a fun group.
Kinkajou: YAS we are THE FUNNEST!!!
Next to arrive is Turtle and Peril. Turtle is carrying both of their character sheets.
Fatespeaker: Hey guys! Welcome!:
Kinkajou: YAY FRIENDS! I brought us a bag of sugar to share!
Fatespeaker: Yep- WAIT DID YOU SAY SUGAR??
Fatespeaker opens the bag and pours herself a talonful as Moon and Qibli arrive.
Moon: Hey! I hope we’re not late!
Qibli: Yeah, are we on time?
Fatespeaker, looking at his character sheet with raised eyebrows: Your name is Hobo Swaggins?
Qibli: Yep.
Fatespeaker:…and your charisma is +5?
Qibli: Mhm.
Fatespeaker: …
Winter enters, in detailed costume.
Winter, who even has props: Did I miss it? 
Kinkajou: OMG COSTUME BUDDIES!!!!
Winter: Oh moons…
Fatespeaker: Well, everyone sit down and we’ll begin!”
Qibli rattles his dice and sets up his dice dunce chair.
Fatespeaker: You are all weary from travelling, and enter a warm tavern. A fire glows in the hearth and many dragons sit in the shadows. One sits at the bar, he wears a golden earring and has a large scar across his snout-
Qibli: Who else is in the tavern?
Fatespeaker: Uhh, in a corner there’s a goblin named Bob.
Qibli: I would like to talk to Bob.
Kinkajou: SAME!!
Moon: I walk over to the bar and sits on a stool. I order a drink.
Peril: This is boring, I only agreed to this because I heard you can commit mass arson.
Turtle: Don’t be mean, Peril. I also walk over to the bar, sitting next to Crystalsight and ordering… uh, French fries.
Fatespeaker: All right. The stranger looks over to you, Crystalsight and Blobfish. He turns to you. “Hey, you two look like the adventuring type. I have something I need to hire a few dragons to do, which I’ll pay handsomely for, if you’re interested.”
Qibli: I walk over to the bar, sitting in between Crystalsight and Blobfish. “I’m so in.” Then I steal Turtle’s fries.
Fatespeaker: I- what- why?
Qibli: Cuz.
Fatespeaker, rubbing her temples: Fine. Roll for sleight of hand.
Qibli, rolling dice: Aw, 5.
Fatespeaker: You slam your talon on the table beside the basket of fries, seeming very crazy.
Turtle: I edge away from him…
Qibli: Dang it.
Winter: I, a cloaked figure, am sitting at the other end of the bar, sipping a glass of apple juice. I gulp it down, then slide over to where the party is sitting. “I hear you’re looking for a group, I’m in.”
Fatespeaker: “Excellent, now, gather closer-“
Peril: I cast BURNING HANDS
Fatespeaker: No, you can’t right now.
Peril: …why not?
Fatespeaker: BECAUSE I SAID SO NOW LET US CONTINUE ON WITH THE FREAKING STORYLINE. Ahem, anyway- “Come closer.”
Kinkajou: I still want to talk to Bob.
Fatespeaker: You- why- alrighty. Bob says: “Hi there, traveller.” With a cranky look, he glares at you. “Can’t you see I’m bUsY?”
Kinkajou, literally bouncing with excitement: Ummm, I say, I say, “HI THERE NEW BEST FRIEND!!!!”
Fatespeaker:…
Fatespeaker: The goblin edges away from you.
Kinkajou, crestfallen: I’ll go and talk to the others, I guess, and order a RAINBOW MILKSHAKE WITH UNICORN SPRINKLES!!
Fatespeaker: Er, fine.
Peril: Can I cast burning hands nowwwww?
Fatespeaker: Not yet Peril
Moonwatcher: …Can we get on with the story?
Peril: That’s BORING!! I want to FIGHT STUFF.
Moonwatcher: …
Fatespeaker: Peril, we’ll get to that. Now, anyway- The stranger leans closer. “I need you to deliver something for me, to a client of mine in Tardel.”
Qibli: Ok, I ask um… what’s his name?
Fatespeaker: he replies with um… Jimmy
Moonwatcher: I say ok gang let go to Tardel
Kinkajou: I say yes yes yes let’s gooo new besties!!!
Fatespeaker : you set out onto the road, ready for the long journey ahea-
Qibli as he put a talonful of sugar into his mouth: i stand ontop of a big rock and rickroll everyone
Fatespeaker : roll for suprise
Qibli: yes yes, its almost done rolling its slowing at 20 its.... its... AW CRUD! a 2
Fatespeaker: You start playing your instrument, but you trip and fall instead. Take 2 points of damage.
Qibli: dang it
Fatespeaker: everyone stares at you 
Moonwatcher: um, ok… let’s continue onward with our quest 
Fatespeaker: a small skeleton appears and hits Hobo Swagans, roll for damage
Qibli: ok *rolling dice* A 17! SO NOW I ROLL REALLY HIGH!?! 
Fatespeaker: your down to… 1HP
Qibli: why D&D gods?
Peril: can I cast burning hands now?
Fatespeaker: um… yes but it might be better to hea…
Peril: I cast burning hands!
Fatespeaker: ok… Turtle could you roll for her.
Turtle: um… yeah *rolling dice* looks like a 12
Fatespeaker: ok good job Peril you killed it and got *rolling dice* 7 bones and it’s rusty sword
Peril: what can I do with those?
Fatespeaker: um, sell them, make a potion with them, or save them
Peril: oh… I guess I throw them out
Turtle: ooh I grab them and make a healing potion 
Fatespeaker: you need a little of their blood for that
Turtle oh while then, I…
Qibli: NO DO NOT STAB ME!
Turtle: *eyeroll* I grab the sword and drop it in
Fatespeaker: that should work because the sword stabbed him
Qibli: oh my bad…
Fatespeaker: roll for how much it heals
Turtle: *rolling dice* looks like a 20 
everybody but Turtle: *gasp* turtle how that’s amazing We dub you the dice king 
Turtle: oh um thanks
Qibli: and I’m the dice dunce, great
Fatespeaker: and that means Qibli’s character has 21HP
Fatespeaker: as you continue on your quest you make it to Tardel 
Category:Fanfictions
Category:Fanfictions (Fanon)
Category:Fanfictions (Incomplete)
Category:Genre (Comedy)
Category:Genre (Adventure)
Category:Content (TheSilkWingCakes)