Trollection/Transcript

The following is a transcript for the episode "Trollection".
== ==
(Lownote is signing up to volunteer to be the new TrollsTopia Confetti Inspector. Dante and Poppy are in charge of the TrollsTopian Volunteer Sign-Up.)
Lownote: I do herby volunteer to be the new TrollsTopia Confetti Inspector. Signed: Lownote Jones. Baby. (He chuckles and throws confetti as he leaves.)
Dante: And with that, the final job has been filled, making the first ever TrollsTopian Volunteer Sign-Up a rousing success! (The crowd does not react.) Ahem. I believe huzzahs are in order.
All: HUZZAH!
Poppy: Way to go, friends! We now have a Troll for every job in TrollsTopia. Like Holly Darlin’, our new Secretary of Skate! (The Trolls cheer for Holly as she skates.)
Holly: Ha-ha! Hot dang! My lifelong dream of skatin’ around handin’ out roller skates to everyone is finally fulfilled! Woo- (Poppy stops her.)
Poppy: Hold that hoo! (The Trolls gasp.) I don’t understand how, but it looks like Biggie also singed up for Secretary of Skate.
All: Huh?
Biggie: Yeah… (Some Trolls reveal him wearing roller skates.) I wasn’t going to say anything, but… Uh-huh.
Dante: You mean, we have two Trolls for one job?! (The crowd does not react.) Ahem. I believe shocked gasps are in order. (The Trolls gasp in shock. At Poppy’s pod, Dante is coming up with an idea.) Holly, Biggie, upon further review, it seems the Secretary of Skate job was listed twice by mistake. (He gives the list to Poppy.)
Poppy: So, one of you will get to be Secretary of Skate, while the other will get the job that was left off the sign-up sheet.
Holly: Well, which job was left off?
Poppy: Uh… Vice President of Telling Little Kids that They’re Too Short to Ride the Roller Coaster?
Holly: So if I wind up Secretary of Skate, Biggie has to… (She imagines Biggie crying with the kids after he tells them they are too short to ride the roller coaster.)
Biggie: It’s for your own safety! (He continues crying and we go back to reality.)
Holly: Poppy! Biggie should be Secretary of Skate!
Biggie: No, Holly should be!
Poppy: I saw this coming. You both want the other to have the better job. So, Dante has proposed that we settle this with a… What do you call it again?
Dante: An election.
Poppy: Yeah. That.
Biggie: Sorry, what’s an “election”?
Poppy: It’s this thing where the people decide who gets a job so the queen doesn’t have to disappoint anyone!
Dante: No, no, Poppy. That’s… adorable, but no. An election is simply the fairest way to determine who is best suited for a position. An election is simply the fairest way to determine who is best suited for a position. It’s a time-honored Classical Troll custom! We’ll hold a formal debate, allowing each candidate to articulate their merits. Then we let all of TrollsTopia vote.
Poppy: What do you guys say?
Holly and Biggie: Hm. (Soon, the Great TrollsTopian Skate Debate starts. Minuet is Holly’s campaign manager while Guy Diamond is Biggie’s campaign manager.)
Poppy: Welcome, one and all, to the Great TrollsTopian Skate Debate! (The audience cheers.)
Holly: I don’t know, Minuet. I can’t bear the thought of Biggie losin’ this election and gettin’ stuck with that awful roller coaster job.
Minuet: Yes, it is troubling. But, Holly, as your campaign manager, I’ll just say: you have my full support.
Guy Diamond: Biggie, as your campaign manager, I’ll just say: I still don’t know what a debate is, but by glitter! You’re going to look good doing it! (Tiny Diamond pops out of his hair and they fart purple glitter on Biggie.)
Guy and Tiny Diamond: Nailed it!
Dante: (Through the microphone) The first question is for Holly: what qualifies make you a good choice for Secretary of Skate?
Holly: (Through the microphone) Well… I’d have to say… (She looks at Biggie.) … honesty! Holly Darlin’ tells it like it is! (The audience cheers and holds up pictures of her.) For example, some Trolls say my opponent is sweet and hard-workin’ and would make a great Secretary. Ha-ha! But Holly Darlin’s the only one with the guts to tell you those Trolls… are absolutely right!
Biggie: Huh?
All: Huh? (They hold up pictures of Biggie and cheer.)
Biggie: Holly, what are you doing?!
Holly: Sorry, sugar, but I can’t watch you make them little kids weep on account of me! So I’m makin’ sure you win this election, even if I gotta play dirty… or clean. I don’t know! This thing’s very confusin’!
Poppy: (Through the microphone) Biggie, same question.
Biggie: (Through the microphone) Me? Uh, well…I’d have to say, the qualities that would make me a good Secretary are… (He looks at Holly.) … my southern charm and hospitality! (The audience gasps.)
Holly: Wha-?
Poppy: But aren’t those actually Holly Darlin’s qualities?
Biggie: Oh! Are they? (sarcastically) What an embarrassing mistake I’ve made! (The audience talks for a moment, hold up pictures of Holly, and cheer.
Holly: Oh, yeah?! Well, last week, my opponent said he loves TrollsTopia ‘cause he gets to spend every day with his friends. But yesterday, he said TrollsTopia symbolizes the hope of a better tomorrow. Well, which is it, Biggie? Friendship or hope?!
Biggie: Well, Holly Darlin’ keeps a diary of everybody’s favorite things so she can get them thoughtful gifts!
Holly: (gasps) I told you that in confidence! BIGGIE IS FANTASTIC, Y’ALL!
Biggie: HOLLY DARLIN’ HELPS EVERYONE!
Holly: HE SINGS LIKE AN ANGEL!
Biggie: SHE SMELLS LIKE PIE!
Smidge: Oh, my Guh! Now they’re just resorting to glitter slinging!
Holly: All right, y’all wanna know who you should vote for?! Let me tell ya! (She kicks her microphone board down. As she and Biggie fight who should be Secretary of Skate, they sing Cast Your Votes (Holly Vs. Biggie).)
(Holly)
Did y’all know this guy right here’s
The MPV of fun?
(Biggie)
Holly is so generous
She just can’t be outdone
(Holly)
Biggie’s brain is extra large
(Biggie)
Her insitution’s super charged
(Holly)
He’s the greatest ever lived
(Biggie)
She’s got much more to give
(Holly)
He’s the best ever
So kind, so clever
Cast your votes for Biggie, yeah!
(Biggie)
She’s the best ever
Nobody better
Cast your votes for Holly, yeah!
(Both)
She’s the best ever (That evening, Holly is in her pod.)
Holly: Hm. (She turns to Minuet.) Well… how’d I do?
Minuet: Not good. You’re 10 points ahead. (She shows a picture of the vote.)
Holly: No!
Minuet: Yes. Biggie really nailed us with those statistics of how many boo boos you’ve kissed. (She shows a picture of lipstick prints.)
Holly: Argh! But the election is in the morning. And if TrollsTopia votes for me, then… then… (She imagines Biggie crying with the children again.)
Biggie: I’m really a very nice Troll! Don’t judge me! (We go back to reality.)
Holly: What am I gonna do?! (A snail appears.) Hm? (The snail spits out a letter and she takes it.) Anonymous snail mail, for me? Ah! Whoever sent this says they can help me lose the election! (Minuet gasps in shock.) They want me to meet them at the Black Rock. “And come alone… Or bring a buddy, the more the merrier.” (The next morning, She and Minuet go inside the Black Rock.)
Minuet: I… I see someone. In the shadows.
Holly: Who are you, stranger? (Mr. Dinkle’s shadow is seen.)
Mr. Dinkles: Mew.
Holly: OK, fine. Don’t tell me. You said you could help? (Mr. Dinkles rolls a leaf across and it hits one of Holly's hooves gently. Holly picks it up. She and Minuet gasp.)
Minuet: It’s photographs of Biggie. He has secretly been giving puppies to babies for years!
Holly: Ha-ha! When the voters see this adorable display, there’s not way Biggie can lose! Thank you, mystery informant. Whoever you are.
Mr. Dinkles: Mew. (He falls over as Minuet and Holly exit the cave.)
Holly: Only 20 minutes before votin’ starts. We’ve gotta get these to the polling station lickity- (She and Minuet gasp because they see Guy Diamond and Biggie in front of them.)
Guy Diamond: Not so fast!
Tiny Diamond: Yeah, centaur-Troll lady! Daddy’s friend Biggie does not want those pictures of his overwhelming and electable kindness out in the open! You feel me?
Holly: Biggie? But how did you even know about the pictures?
Biggie: (Taking out a note) ‘Cause Mr. Dinkles never leaves our hair pod without leaving a note.
Holly: “Went to give Holly incriminating evidence. BRB.” Oh.
Biggie: I mean, it’s a huge betrayal and I don’t know why he did it, but I do appreciate the little heart he used to dot the “I” in incriminating and- (Holly runs away.) Hey! Come back here! (As the Metroll Train appears, Holly jumps into a car.)
Holly: Ha! (She sighs in relief.)
Biggie: End of the line, Holly. (He and Holly grunt while they get ready to fight. (The train goes through a tunnel and little bit of light shine.)
Both: (gasp) Strobe light dance party! (They start dancing. Soon, the train comes out of the tunnel.)
Biggie: No! (Holly pulls the breaks and the train stops, causing him to fall over.) Oh! Uh! (Holly jumps over him.)
Holly: Ha! (She gets off the train and heads for the voting.)
Dante: The vote shall commence in five minutes! (Holly takes out the pictures and laughs.)
Biggie: Holly! (He and Holly stop running.)
Holly: It’s too late, Biggie. Face it: I win- by which I mean, I lose… See? Very confusin’!
Biggie: Holly, I am begging you. Please, don’t leak those photos. You have to be Secretary of Skate.
Holly: No, Biggie. Sweet as it is, you ain’t gonna help me win so you can be nice to me!
Biggie: Nice to you? I’m not helping you win to be nice to you.
Holly: Wait. You’re not? Then why…?
Biggie: Because you’re an incredibly qualified Troll who loves to serve others and who happens to be a far better skater than I am. In other words, I believe you are the best Troll for the position. And in the end, isn’t that how everyone should decide who to vote for?
Holly: Oh. Well, see, now here I am with my mind all made up and then you come along and ruin it by sayin’ somethin’ beautiful? Thanks, Biggie. Here. (She gives the photos back to Biggie and he puts them in his hair. Poppy’s watch then chimes.)
Poppy: OK, TrollsTopia, let’s vote! (The crowd gets ready to vote. Soon, Holly is Secretary of Skate. She gives skates to a blue female Pop Troll.)
Holly: Skates for you. (She gives skates to a yellow male Funk Troll.) Skates for you. (She skates over to Poppy and spins.) Ta-da!
Poppy: Well, look at you go… Madame Secretary! I guess it all turned out best for everyone, huh?
Holly: Yeah! Everyone but Biggie.
Poppy: Biggie? No, wait. You haven’t heard? Biggie loves his job! (We show Biggie comforting the children who are too short to ride the roller coaster.)
Biggie: The best part is, you have something to look forward to when you are all tall enough! And for now… (He gets three ice cream cones.) … how about an ice cream?!
All: Yeah!
Holly: Well, dang, y’all! He’s amazin’ at this! Who knew?
Poppy and Holly: Aw! (The camera moves over to Mr. Dinkles.)
Mr. Dinkles: Yes. Who knew indeed? (He falls over and the episode ends.)
Category:TT Season 4 episode transcripts
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