The Chewin' Bruin'

"The Chewin' Bruin'" is the 1st episode of the Comedy Central series SpongeBob Goes Mad! It originally aired on 3 July 2020. It was selected No. 2 on the "10 SpongeBobs that Changed the World" list, and was also part of "SpongeBob's Dirty Dozen." In the episode, Mr. Krabs travels to the Vatican to confront the growing problem of Catholic priests molesting children. Meanwhile, Patrick discovers that it is possible to defecate from the mouth.
==Plot==
The citizens of Bikini Bottom are a bit concerned when Mr. Krabs informs them about the Young Men's Catholic Retreat and agree that they do not want their village idiots to go. They also decide to have a counselor talk to SpongeBob and Patrick to find out if the priest had been molesting them. The counselor, assuming the two were molested, asks, "Did Mr. Krabs, at any time, ever try to put something in your butt?" Having never been abused by Mr. Krabs, the two are completely baffled about the question's meaning. Patrick has a "brilliant" idea, reasoning he meant it could be possible that eating food through the rectum can cause defecation through the mouth. Squidward overhears them and thinks it is stupid and disgusting, and Patrick bets him $20 it will work. While the counselor is questioning SpongeBob and Patrick, everyone else decides to become atheists, as the sexual molestation scandals have destroyed their faith in Catholicism and God.
Patrick ultimately does defecate out of his mouth, winning the bet and continually boasts the fact to Squidward, who becomes increasingly angered by it. News of this spreads, and it is concluded nationwide that this method of eating is much healthier than the traditional method (with the surgeon general basing that on "absolutely nothing"). The adults of Bikini Bottom immediately adopt the new method of eating, calling it interorectogestion and even start passing trash cans around at social situations to openly collect the waste (literally "spewing crap from their mouths"), completely disregarding the previously long-held custom that defecation should occur in private.
Meanwhile, Mr. Krabs has gathered a meeting of Catholic priests in the Pacific to discuss the problem of child molestation. Mr. Krabs is appalled by such behavior and wants it to cease entirely, but to Mr. Krabs's horror, all of the other priests there have molested their altar boys. Mr. Krabs decides he has to go to the Vatican. Once there, he quickly finds the same: priests from all over the world (and from other worlds, specifically an alien race known as the Irkens) are molesting children and claim they need to continue the practice to receive gratification. They claim the "Holy Document of Vatican Law" does not prohibit the behavior, so Mr. Krabs wants to change the canon law to outlaw sodomy, as well as to allow sex with women. The Cardinal tells him that the Document cannot be changed as no one knows where it is. Mr. Krabs decides to try to find it. Meanwhile, Squidward has lost his patience with Patrick's incessant boasting and tells Patrick that he accepts the fact that he beat him fairly. This angers Patrick, as he wanted to hold the victorious bet over Squidward's head indefinitely.
Mr. Krabs searches through the lower levels of the Vatican, and goes through a gauntlet in the style of Pitfall! in order to reach the Holy Document. But the Pope says they must first consult the highest power. Since the highest power is the Queen Spider, he gives up.
== Trivia ==
* The episode has similar elements to the following episodes from certain TV shows:
** "Of All the Shit That Comes From Your Mouth!" from Teen Titans Go!
** "Vatican City 2: Electric Boogaloo" from Breadwinners
** "Sing a Song of Bullshit" from Fanboy & Chum Chum: Adult Party Cartoon
Category:TV-MA
Category:SpongeBob Goes Mad!
Category:Episodes