Starfish Lives Matter

"Starfish Lives Matter" is the seventh episode of Season 3 of Life in Bikini Bottom, and the 36th overall.
==Characters==
TBA
==Synopsis==
After Fatprick vandalizes a statue of Bastard, he gets into an encounter with the police. This leads to a riot being carried out by Mrs. Puss and her gang, to which Bastard has to respond to and put down immediately.
==Plot==
 TIME CARD: 2 WEEKS LATER
The episode begins with a shot of hospital, where we enter to see Fatprick and SpongeCock in it, both wearing masks, and Dr. Nick, who is also wearing a mask. “Alright, Fatprick,” Dr. Nick says, while filing through hospital tools. “You tested negative. Your bout with COVID is over.” “HUH?! NEGATIVE?!” Fatprick loses it, “I’ll let you know that I am the most positive son of a bitch you will ever see. Trust me, how positive do you think I get when I see the ice cream cakes haven’t sold out yet? Because oh boy, that means I’m gonna make them sell out real good.” Dr. Nick slaps Fatprick across his face. “Jeez, both you AND Assy,” he complains. “Positive means that you have it, negative means that you don’t. God…” he says, while walking out of the room.
“But for real though,” Fatprick says, “I’m still not over this COVID thing. It set me over the edge. And if I find out who brought this to Bikini Bottom, oh boy, I’m gonna-“
“BREAKING NEWS!” We hear a report with Ronnie Snickersnee, playing on the hospital TV. “Big news today, as we have received word on the transportation of COVID-19 to Bikini Bottom. Bikini Bottom leader Sheldon Bastard was exposed in numerous anonymous documents to have a major part in causing the mass chaos, showing that it had nothing to do with the arrival of Donald Trump or Joe Biden. More to come, later tonight.” 
“Welp,” SpongeCock says to Fatprick, “there’s your answer. But you should’ve known that anyway.” Fatprick puts on a grin, as well as a look in his eyes that feels dangerous. “Well well well, he messed with the bull? Now he gets the horns,” Fatprick pulls up his pants, is shown Naruto running to the nearest bathroom, as we cut to an outside shot of the bathroom. Fatprick makes a sound reminiscent to a nuke drop, as SpongeCock yells “SHE’S GONNA BLOW!” The hospital then blows up into smithereens, and the whole property is destroyed. The camera pans over everyone who was in the explosion, but then focuses on Fatprick and SpongeCock. “Fatprick, you dumbass,” SpongeCock scolds him. “How is that getting vengeance on Bastard?” “Oh, it’s not,” Fatprick answers, “it’s getting revenge on this damn hospital. These prices are outrageous!” He says, waving around the medical bill given to him by Dr. Nick. “YOU’RE NOT EVEN THE ONE PAY- Nevermind,” SpongeCock rolls his eyes, as Fatprick looks at the bill again. “Hm, no toilet paper in site…” “NO FATPRICK, DON’T! DON-“
Donald Trump: I’m going down to Bikini Bottom, gonna grab myself a pussy!
SpongeCock + Shitward: Fascism is everywhere, you don’t know what you got into!
Joe Biden: I’m going down to Bikini Bottom, gonna sniff myself some hair.
Fatprick: I was gonna take a shit, the government is tryna stop me!
Bernie Sanders: I’m going down to Bikini Bottom, let’s have Medicare for All!
Gory: Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow!
Mr. Kraps: They just took all of me money…
Sheldon Bastard: So come on down to Bikini Bottom, because you’ll be my slave here!
The episode cuts to Donald Trump and Joe Biden’s hideout building, as we begin their story with a shot of them in their basement hot tub. “Oh yeah, two old guys in a hot tub,” Trump says, lively. “It doesn’t get any better” We then see a tall, Russian fish walk in with an AK-47, aiming it at Trump. “HM… THIS EXCHANGE LOOKS QUITE HOMOSEXUAL, IF I MAY SAY SO MYSELF…” He says, with a deep voice. Trump chuckles it off at first. “Alright, Tim, I see you’ve crawled back to support me after you were in favor of impeachment. But really, you should be voting for-“ We then see Travis Penile from “Stop Jacking Off In Class” appear behind Tim. “Please Tim… do it… shoot both of them, please!” “NOW WAIT A MINUTE!” Tim says, turning back. “I’M GONNA SHOOT YOUR ASS UP, TRAVIS!” He then points the gun at him. “Oh yeah, Tim, shoot my with that big, girty gun in your pants. Aka your cock.” “NO! NOT MY RUSSIAN ROOSTER!” Tim says, about to pull the trigger. Biden steps out of the hottub, telling them both. “I don’t even know you two, hell I don’t even know myself. But anyway, GET OUT! This is life, not no malarkey.” The two of them look at each other, sulking as security takes them out. “How did they even get in here, with the pandemic and all that?” Pence asks, from another hallway.
“Nevermind that, Mike,” Trump says, while readjusting himself in the hottub. “Sorry, hot tub boners are the worst. Anywho, it’s about time we start discussing my master plan that’ll overthrow Sheldon Bastard once and for all.” Biden seems intrigued as he gets back into the hottub. “Ah, making Bikini Bottom a democracy again?” “No. Absolutely not. Don’t be ridiculous, Joe. Instead of that fascist being in charge, me, a better fascist, is gonna steal his spotlight.” “Is that really fair,” Biden questions. “Oh believe me, my friend, this is like the most fair thing ever. Just like denying global warming and killing billions of people because of my takes.” Biden pours a glass of champagne, and then takes a sip from it. “I thought this was just a plan to make me president? Wait, what about the anonayamd… wait, I’m sorry… anononymou… no, wait… anonononononononononon Batman… look, you know what I mean.” Trump takes some champagne himself. “Well, that was just to expose Bastard for not being good enough, to my standards. This is a mutual agreement anyway, right Joe? I become leader of Bikini Bottom, you become president of the United Steaks.” “United States, Donny. Even I knew that,” Trump rolls his eyes. “Whatever.” They then shake hands, and propose a toast.
                    FATPRICK… IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
The episode cuts to Fatprick, who is seen late at night seaking out of the pinyapple. He’s wearing a dark hoodie and a ski mask, trying his best to hide him. We see him check the contents of his suitcase. “Alright, supply check… spray paint,” he says, while holding up a can. “Check. Axe…” He then pulls out the axe, to which he drops it on his arm, cutting it off. He screams, but then it grows back. “Ow, but check. Rope…” He pulls out a noose, to which he gasps and unties it into a regular rope. “Check. Alright, time to go do some ‘civil disobedience’ if you know what I mean.” He takes his suitcase, shoves it in one of his fat rolls, and starts walking away from the pinyapple, into the town center. We see the statue of Sheldon Bastard, as shown in previous episodes, as Fatprick sets up his plan. “Well, well, well, we meet again, statue I helped build against my own will.” He empties his suitcase and uses a ladder to climb up. “Some may say this is treason. And to which I say, Brazzers is preferable to XVideos. Or, uh, shit, I mean treason is good.” He shakes the spray can, to which he raises it up about to spray. However, like any ol’ idiot, he points it the wrong way, directly spraying the paint into his eyes as he falls off the ladder. “NOOO!!!!” he says melodramatically, as his fat makes him bounce up back onto the ladder. “Anyway, let’s get this started,” he says, as he begins to spray all over the statue. After a bit, he takes out his axe and whacks the base of the statue, causing it to sway a bit, He then jumps off the ladder before it falls down. “Yessir, our leader is DOWN!” He then sprays more graffiti on it, as we see Polfgecks652 looking over from down the street.
“YOU!” He shouts, jumping more into the scene. “Cease that blasphemy immediately!” Fatprick looks at him, pulling up his ski mask for a second. We see Polfgecks’ scanner vision, as he scans over Fatprick’s face. He identifies him correctly, and he then uses it to shoot a laser, which Fatprick barely dodges. He screams, and then starts fleeing the scene. “Oh god, I’m in some major shit,” he says, stumbling through the town. Polfgecks hits some signals on his own screen, as he ends up on a dialing screen. “Calling backup, calling backup, we’ve got a runner,” he warns. “FATPRICK STAR IS THE ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE!”
We see Fatprick dodging several street lights while a police siren is heard in the background, He sees a cop car, to which he exclaims “oh shit” and then goes behind the nearest wall. The car passes by, as he exhales loudly. “Damn… That was close.” When he turns back onto the sidewalk, he immediately finds himself surrounded by a group of cops, all holding up pistols, and some of them getting out of their car. “FREEZE, pinky!,” the chief yells, as he’s loading his pistol. “Put your hands down in your pants, rub it real good!” Fatprick chuckles, finding it funny. “Well then, if you say so.” He then pulls the waistband on his pants, as he shoves his hand down in there. “Wow, I love stroking my pink, girthy gun in my pa-” “HE’S GOT A GUN!” Every officer there proceeds to shoot a bullet, to which Fatprick continues to get hit, propelling himself backwards. He’s against the wall with blood flowing out of his bullet holes. The camera pans to one of the cops, chuckling as he puts his gun back on his belt. “I knew Leader Bastard was using the wrong ammo,” he says. “That fat bitch didn’t stand a chance.” 
				BACK AT THE PINYAPPLE
We cut to see SpongeCock and Kraps grilling up a batch of weed patties, preparing for the lunch rush. “There is one disadvantage to being here, not having the Krusty Kock, you know,” Kraps points out. “What’s that?” “No strippers up in here.” SpongeCock rolls his eyes. “Mr. Kraps, your own daughter is a pornstar, why are you associating yourself with other people who should be sent to the streets?” Kraps shrugs, as Fricky comes downstairs. “Yo, dad, I’m meeting up with my homies, Scotty and all that,” clearly hiding the fact that he’s in a gang. “No, Fricky,” SpongeCock asserts. “We already had Fatprick catch the rona, we don’t need you too. Besides, you have no homies. Scotty doesn’t count.” Kraps agrees to him. “Yeah, he’s a bastard alright. I remember the day I saw him, I thought my sister was insane.” Fricky rolls his eyes, clearly not taking no for an answer. “Well too bad, we need to discuss the Fatprick incident.” “Don’t you have Cuum?” (Zoom parody, damn fool) “You can’t exactly start a riot over Cuum, daddy cakes,” Fricky leaves, defying SpongeCock’s instruction and slamming the door shut. “Stupid kid,” SpongeCock says to Kraps. “What even is the Fatprick incident?” Coincidentally, after he asks this, we get a news flash from Ronnie Snickersnee.
“BREAKING NEWS!,” he says, sounding a bit more stressed than usual. “Riots have broken out as a result of the shooting of Bikini Bottomite Fatprick Star last night by Leader Bastard’s police force. After weeks of an empty public, we now have civilians flooding the street in protest-” as a cop slams Snickersnee from the back of his head. “Sorry, police business.” The cop grabs the mic and starts talking into the broadcast. “There may be complete pandemonium here, and sure we almost killed a guy, but our far right bootlicking supporters will vouch for us.” The news room then gets flooded with a mix of cops and protestors, leading to the network cutting out.”
“What the hell? What even-” SpongeCock says in confusion, as the TV now cuts to both security footage of the encounter, presumably in order to divert attention away from the news room storming. SpongeCock sighs, as he starts to light up one of the weed patties. “Who else but Fatprick?” He says, as he walks back away, not acting like anything’s happening.
                      FRICKY’S GANG
We cut to Fricky and Scotty walking together, socially distant with masks on. They bump elbows before talking. “So bud, how’s quarantine been?” “Well, I found out that I’m attracted to chunky peanut butter. I go through 6 of those cans a day.” Fricky has a deadpan expression. “Attracted?” “Yeah, I stick my dick right in all of them,” Scotty reassures. Both of them see their gang in the distance, as they sprint to catch up with them. “Yo guys, wait up, we wanna kick some ass too!” Then run right beside Mrs. Puss, who is wearing a “Starfish Lives Matter” shirt, a mask, and has a megaphone. This is all in front of a police brigade set right in front of the Cum Bucket. “Uh, what is it, Mrs. Puss?”
Mrs. Puss lowers her megaphone, and then talks to Fricky. “Too many innocent starfish are oppressed by the systemic climate in Bikini Bottom. Fatprick almost went down as a statistic last night,” she proclaims. Fatprick randomly appears right next to them. “I sure did!” “Fatprick?!” Fricky says, stunned. “How did you get well so fast?” Fatprick chuckles, then ruffles Fricky’s head. “Well, boy, let’s just say I had a few ice cream cakes worth of shield around me. But your leader with the big pufferfish tits-” “HEY!” Mrs. Puss screeches. “Stop sexually harassing me.” Fatprick bows down. “Sorry, ma’am. But anyway, I come from a long line of people who were killed as a result of government bias. First, my great, great, great grandpa, Skinnyprick Star-”
[shows a flashback of Skinnyprick Star walking back from the store, a chocolate bar in hand. “Hopefully this will solve my Skinnyprickness,” he says, as he gets shot from above as he unwraps it. The camera pans over to watch the tower with a couple of cops in it. “Bullseye,” the cop with the sniper in hand says. “You got him good,” the other one adds on, “that’ll teach him not to eat a chocolate bar in plain sight.]
Fatprick continues talking. “As well as my great aunt, Whoreclit Star.”
[shows a flashback of Whoreclit Star at a strip club, grasping the pole and spreading her legs. A brigade of police bust in the door, all with guns up. “FREEZE! This is a raid, nobody move!” Whoreclit is seen, being the only one to not follow the directions. “Well, officers, there must be SOME way we can settle this out!” One of the cop comes up to her and sprays tear gas all over her genitalia, causing it to go up and making her nauseous. “Score!” he says, as Whoreclit is seen on the ground unconscious.]
“And finally,” Fatprick concludes, “my third cousin, Elvis Presley.”
[shows Elvis dropping down his pants and sitting on the toilet. He grabs a peanut butter and banana sandwich, and starts eating it. “Mmm…” We then hear an unsettling sound from his stomach, as he clenches and says “oh no.” An outside shot of his mansion is shown, as a huge explosion occurs.]
Fricky and Scotty glance at each other in confusion. “Wait, Elvis was your cousin? And how is that on the same level as the other two?” Fatprick shrugs. “I dunno. Maybe it was Jimi Hendrix. In that case-” “NO!” Scotty shoves his claw in Fatprick’s mouth. “We don’t need to hear you describe another rockstar’s death.” Mrs. Puss turns on her megaphone, tests the feedback, and then starts talking to the crowd. 
“People of Bikini Bottom, may I have your attention,” she says, as some residents come out of their houses and lean in to hear. “Before you ask, no I’m not Bastard, and I’m not Bastard as a female. Far from it.” We hear some chatter from them, and then one says “that’s good enough for me.” “For far too long, the starfish of Bikini Bottom have been put down in society. Flabbergasted, hoodwinked, killed, and dare I say, fucked over,” Puss continues, as Fatprick gets in the shot and says “that’s me! Except I get fucked AS WELL AS fucked over,” he clarifies. “And these trying times have simply been perpetuated by our fascist leader, Sheldon D. Bastard, for he will not even provide housing and healthcare to our poor, homeless starfish,” she says. “Hell, soon enough, maybe the SpongeBob Fanon Wiki Policy will live into full fruition and Bikini Bottom will have Starfish segregation! We can’t be having that!” As she continues to ramble on, we zoom inside the Cum Bucket to see Bastard tuning in on the whole conversation. He takes his eye off for a second as he starts to complain.
“PFFT! That Thotty Puss is a liar,” he says, as both ComputerBitch 5000 and Polfgecks652 roll in. “I didn’t refuse housing and healthcare for starfish, I refused it for everyone! Get your facts straight, liberal snowflake.” ComputerBitch 5000 tries to rebut him. “Sheldon, that’s still quite inhumane.” “Yes, yes it is,” Bastard says. “Your point?” ComputerBitch 5000 rolls the eyes on her screen as Bastard continues. “Everyone knows that I love our starfish. Hell, I’ve done more for starfish than any other monarch of Bikini Bottom!” “Again, Sheldon, you’re the onl-” “Yeah, yeah, I get it,” Bastard says. “The point is, I’ll be fine. My far right cult followers will lick my tiny, tiny boots, as well as the inchworm cocks of my police force.” “Just like how I lick the juicy, juicy openings of my strawberry mistresses,” Polfgecks652 says, as he grabs a carton of strawberry milk and pours it on himself, causing him to malfunction. Bastard ignores him, going outside on his portable throne to speak to the audience.
“And so, we must revolt!” Mrs. Puss, says, ending off her speech and causing the uproar of thousands cheering with her. Bastard yanks the megaphone from her, looking on with a stern expression. “Trust me, trust me, I don’t condone the killing of just any one species. I support the killing of starfish [camera pans to Fatprick], sponges [camera pans to Fricky], crabs [camera pans to Scotty], pufferfish [camera pans to Mrs. Puss], and any other species of fish down here that I hate so much. ALL OF THEM!” Puss takes the megaphone back, yelling into it “And I want to stop this man, this fascist, by any means necessary. Even… [whispers] violence.” We see Hooplass looking over at the incident, gasping. “OH MY GOD! I CAN’T TELL THE DIFFERENCE!” Hooplass is then shot by Puss, as he gets slammed to the ground in a pool of blood. “See?” We then see some cops drift over in their cars, as the chief comes out. “Okay, Mrs. Puss, you’re under arrest for murder.” Mrs. Puss puts her gun down, as she yells in defiance. “WHAT?! You damn fools murder people all the time.” “Yeah, but murder’s fine if it happens to a starfish. Besides, we’re licensed, so you can’t pin that against us.” 
“Alright, that’s it!” Mrs. Puss says, as she signals over to the crowd. “Let’s show them who they’re messing with!” Fricky then throws a molotov over towards the cops, as a full on war starts. We see some rioters in the front and protestors in the back, as we also see some cops firing back from behind a wall. We see SpongeCock enter the scene as well, from behind, as he tries to make sense of the situation. “Oh, so this was the great rebellion that Bern always told us about,” he says, as he picks up a rock and launches it over the wall. Through the riot we see going on, ComputerBitch 5000 peaks out of a window in the Cum Bucket. “Well, Polfgecks,” she says, turning to him. “Hasn’t everyone forgotten we’re in a pandemic? Oh shit, I’m about to sound like Sheldon,” she says, quickly shutting up. “Yeah,” Polfgecks replies, “but who cares. When it comes to penetrating the juiciest fruit out there, I NEED to get within six feet. There is simply no other way,” he says, as it cuts back outside.
“Yeah, that’s RIGHT!” Puss continues to encourage. “Now they’ll listen to us. NOW THEY WILL!” Fricky is seen with Scotty, both of them holding up signs fighting for equality. “Damn, Scotty, this is turning out better than I thought it would. Antifa is fun.” Scotty nods, but then looks down. “Wait, what’s Antifa again?” “The gang we’re in,” he clarifies, as he ducks from a shot by a cop. “Damn fool.”
The camera pans over to the police, who are beginning to run out of ammo. “Goddamnit! How can we stop those radical Marxists now?” One of the other cops tries to scan through some people in the mob. “Alright, sure as hell that ONE OF YOU’s gotta be a bootlicker for us! You know, someone who will defend anything we do, even if that includes putting starfish in gas chambers, inside of concentration camps, you know, all that?” Right after he says that, we get a birds eye view of the cops, that is starting to inch closer and closer. “My god…” Bastard says, as he also looks up. The camera pans over to see that is L’fuck the Lobster towering over everyone. “My god, that’s a big momma right there,” Bastard says, quickly turning into “but also the finishing dagger to these damn fools!”
“Did somebody say radical Marxists?” L’fuck says, as he flexes his abs. “Yes, yes we did,” a cop says. “BECAUSE I HATE RADICAL MARXISTS!” L’fuck goes into the crowd, starting to slap everybody. “I back the blue! BECAUSE THEY KEEP RADICAL LEFTISTS LIKE YOU OUT OF HERE! YEAH, FUCK YOU AND YOUR FEELINGS,” he rages, while literally turning into a red version of the hulk. Everyone seems to be scared of this, except for Fatprick, who steps right in front of him and morphs into an even fatter version of himself. “Yeah, nothing can stop me now!” He states before blindly running into Fatprick, as both of them morph back into normal size. “Well, that was anticlimactic,” Fricky says from the side. Mrs. Puss agrees, “Indubitably.” Fatprick gets up, stands in the center of the crowd, and orders everyone to stop what they’re doing.
“This is getting ridiculous, even for a degen like me,” he sets straight. “I’ve been suffering for long enough, and we need now more than ever to unite.” The camera pans over to the police force, L’fuck, and Bastard, all standing, looking fazes. “You three wouldn’t listen to us until we started rioting. And even then, you only focused on how we carried out our message, rather than our message in the first place. Just remember - starfish lives matter.” “NO!” L’fuck disagrees. “All lives matter! Well, except for Muslims, Jews, practically anyone we can pin the blame on for our reckless actions.” “Welp, you all see,” Fatprick parts. “I’ve made my point clear.” This worked, seeing as everyone has stopped rioting, and the cops have stopped their damnfoolery as well. 
“Eh, you know what, that’s fine,” L’fuck says. “But I’m still gonna back my saviors, Leader Bastard and THE BEST PRESIDENT EVER, DONALD J. TRUMP! YEAH!” He says, reverting back to screaming. Bastard facepalms. “No, Larry, you weren’t supposed to-” This causes a whispering outbreak among the crowd, leading to SpongeCock finally breaking it. “I knew Trump was behind this. I knew he had to be,” SpongeCock says, leading to a new rebellion being formed. “Well, if he wants to espouse his shit like that, then I can’t let those degenerate Americans vote for him,” he says, as everyone follows him out of the town square, as they all chant “Dump the Trump” repeatedly. “Ehh…” SpongeCock then stops, “I don’t really feel like doing this again. Just no one here vote for Trump, got it?”
We then cut back to L’fuck and Bastard one last time. “Sometimes I just gotta learn when to shut the fuck up,” L’fuck says, sulking off. Bastard watches him, but then turns back towards his destroyed statue. “Oh, no worries, no worries. I will remain superior, and Trump WILL remain president,” he says, as the episode ends with a menacing shot of him.
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