Skooma Cat

Skooma Cat is an Alfiq incarnation of Sheogorath found in Northern Elsweyr.
==Interactions==
===The Lunacy of Two Moons===
Priest Haduras asks the Vestige to investigate the cause of the madness afflicting the clergy at the Two Moons at Tenmar Temple.
==Personality==
The Skooma Cat enjoys inflicting madness on individuals, much like his counterpart. However, as an Alfiq, he has a weakness for cream and yarn. He also has a habit of purring which he has no control over.
==Dialogue==
;The Lunacy of Two Moons
Inside Skooma Cat's Cloister; first distraction:
"Wait your turn, plaything. There'll be plenty of time for me to chase you around this little maze after I've finished my snack. All these games work up an appetite!"
:Look what I found. "Is that cream? Oh, I could go for some fatty bavine discharge right now. Why'd you go and bring it to me in a cup? Cat's don't have thumbs! Well, most cats. Why don't I have thumbs? Hold on to that while I grow thumbs. Hngh ... this may take a bit."
::I'll figure something out.
Second distraction:
"Think you're the cream of the croup, eh? Well, you won't be filling my head with daydreams of sweet, cow squeezings this time. I lapped up every last drop! Now what are you going to do with all that dry toast, eh? Ha ha ha!"
:Look what I found. "Yarn! So soft and bouncy. Just makes me want to bat it around like a newborn babe ... no! You're trying to distract me again. Well, I'm not having it!"
::Are you sure you don't want to play with the yarn? "No...! Wait--yes! Grr! Keep dangling those luxurious, ropey threads in my face and you'll find my claws in yours! Off with you!"
Third encounter:
"It was me the whole time! Are you surprised? I was surprised."
:I already knew you were the Skooma Cat. I thought you said you'd let Sizenza go if I took her place. "Oh, right. So I did! But then I thought it'd be more fun to just keep you both. I was half right. You're a little too good as a plaything. Not fair if you're always winning!"
::What's not fair is you cheating. "That's the best part of playing games with lunatics, they're always changing the rules! You'd get it, if you just let me whack you on the noggin a few hundred times. No? Well, game's over. Off with you now!"
:::Don't be a sore loser. "Look at you. Making demands. In my games. In my realm. All right, one last impossible challenge for you then. How's that for sporting? Say my name three times backwards."
::::My name three times backwards. "You took the words right out of me mouth! Next you’ll be plucking my teeth for a new princely smile. Well, you can’t have them! I need them to bite Haskill. Take a bite out of my anchor instead, would ya?"
::::<Turn your back.> Sheogorath, Sheogorath, Sheogorath. "Bah! Knew I should have gone with frontwards! They never expect that. Anyone who'd turn their back to a Daedric Prince is a wedge short of a wheel. Go on and take that one. You earned it. Looney."
::::Htarogoehs, Htarogoehs, Htarogoehs! "Now how'd you--that can't be--I don't ... normally that'd twist your tongue around to taste the inside of your ears! Or was it my tongue? All right, you win again. Go on and take your prize. Oh! Ear cheese."
==Quotes==
*"Cheese, cheese, cheese. Enjoy a few thousand wheels and suddenly it's all people get you when Sun's Dawn comes around. Do I look like a rat to you? Am I a rat? Meow? Still a cat. Off with you then! I have important catting to do."
*"Oooh, my ears are burning hotter than Dagon's backside. Come on. Give'em a scratch, would ya?"
*"Hngh … ah! Still no thumbs. Just quit tempting me with cream when I can't drink it!"
*"Can't a fella lick himself in peace? Off with you!"
*
==Appearances==
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Category:Elsweyr: Alfiq
Category:Online: Daedra