Eternal Cycles

Dear Mother,
I've been in this shithole long enough. I was 14 years old when I first arrived in this place, it seems like... How did I get here again? Never mind, I don't remember.  I've been in this place for about 300 years. The time here works strangely, even though I should be dead, my body is still in its nineties. Maybe God didn't want me to die, but then again why would God bring me to this place. Or maybe I explored too deeply into the backroom that even time had forgotten I existed.
One by one, my companions left me, some unable to escape the pursuit of the entity and died, some unable to escape the shackles of time, and others disappeared in the levels, never to return. I've had... Five years since I've seen a living person. I was scared, because of loneliness, because of sadness, because of the fear of death, because of the fear of the unknown, and because I didn't know how deep this bottomless pit went.
One day I happened to have the misfortune of nocliping into the void. I stayed there for 1 week, and if I hadn't had water and food on me, I would probably be dead by now, but looking back it actually seems better to be dead. Until one day I suddenly began to fall. I started to fall very fast, the speed could almost tear my flesh apart, just when I felt I was going to pass out, the falling speed suddenly slowed down, I looked down, and it was Level 0. 
How could Level 0 be here? With confusion and disbelief, I lived here for three days, strangely enough, compared to the sense of crisis and fear I felt before, or the sense of loneliness I felt when I first arrived at Level 0, this place only gave me a strange sense of warmth and familiarity, almost as if I had returned home, as if I had returned to you. It was a feeling that relaxed my tense nerves and made me realize how tired I was, how exhausted I was, and how homesick I was.
I suddenly understood everything.
I'd heard the information about this yellow maze countless times, and I was sick of it. Those countless times of joy upon discovering the exit and countless times of disappointment upon discovering a new level. The deeper I go only to find the more difficulty and the less information to use within these levels. I've been here too long, gone too deep inside, and yet I'm back where I started, and it's as if it's a cycle that goes back and forth, holding me captive. It's as if the warmth of this place has turned into a trap that pulls me into the abyss, but even though I know in my heart it's a trap, I can't resist it and I don't seem to want to escape. Yes, even if I escape, so what, who I know in the real world all died, who will still know me, I'm just a nobody, I will still be alive, but I no longer exist.
O Mother, after writing this letter, I will lie on this damp floor and feel the warmth. I will look at the flickering light, listen to the familiar humming sound, slowly close my eyes and let my emaciated life fade away.
O Mother, it's been 300 years and we're finally going to be reunited.
Love,
Eric.
Category:Tales