Origins of Barry

== His life begins ==
Barry was founded in 1927 by Dennis and Pooberta Isstreamming, a young couple in Weast Dakota who dreamed of building a little baby boy from scratch, but got tired and instead just bought the kit from Home Depot. After many grueling minutes and only a handful of missteps, construction on little baby Barrold was completed. His name was derived, of course, from a combination of his parents occupations; his mother was a lawyer who had just passed her Barr exam, and his father yelled at clouds.
Barrold, or Barry for short, was full of wonder and fascination for the world around him in his early years, though not enough to explore any of it, or even look at it really, so he mostly sat around and played PAC-Man, the source of all Video Games and father to all. Due to his close and extended contact with The Source, Barry soon gained the societal class of "Gamer", a repulsive title that brings shame and upset tumbies to Dennis and Pooberta, as well as millions of other parents, to this very day.
== His career begins ==
In 1978, when Barry reached the ripen't age of 22, he left his parents, who bid him farewell with a sad slow-clap, and went off into the world to find a career that would give him money...or at least some purpose. At first, Barry tried to let nominative determinism decide his career, but after a near-death experience on class 1 river rapid and an embarrassing ribbon dancing injury, he decided that this was a stupid idea and abandoned it altogether. It was shortly after this that Barry legally changed his last name to Kramer to remind himself never to go back to stream-related career paths.
== His career continues to begins ==
Unfortunately, without the warm, comforting embrace of nominative determinism, Barry found it quite difficult to find any kind of meaningful work. As a last resort, he accepted a job from a group of small Giants to scrub and clean their filthy, funny-looking feets. A grueling, thankless job, to be sure, but Barry did find a certain level of satisfaction in getting the fungus out from between their little pigglies and generally helping the Giants have good foot hygiene. It is also believed that this period of time spent in such close proximity to giant stinky feet is what led to Barry's signature stinkiness, though others claim that he may have just been born with it.
Though somewhat satisfied with his current standings, Barry often found himself longing for more. He frequently had very original thoughts such as "There must be more than this provincial lifeTM" and "I want to go where the people areTM" and "I just can't wait to be kingTM" and the such and the like. Eventually, he packed these thoughts, and the rest of his belongings, into a portable hamster cage and left the employ of the Giants. It being 2004 and Barry being age 27, perhaps the world was finally ready show him the path on which he belonged.
== His career is getting real close to the part where it no longer begins ==
To fully understand the next part of Barrold's journey, we must first venture back, both in time and across the ocean, to Ireland in late 1994, when a man named Justin St. Reams invented a new, revolutionary form of communication in which a person broadcasts themselves live and in real time to as many people-with-nothing-better-to-do-right-now, often abbreviated as 'pwnbtdrn', as they can manage to scrounge up. Many of the pwnbtdrn began referring to the activity as 'St. Reaming', named after the inventor, but since adding extra periods and capitalization is annoying, the term was condensed to 'streaming' and the people broadcasting themselves became known as 'streamers'.
So what does any of this have to do with dear ol' Barrold? Well, back out in the wilds of unemployment, young Barrold soon caught wind of this new career path, and was immediately reminded of the nominative determinism that he swore off so long ago. Did he abandon it's soothing, ethereal, enigmatic bear-hug too soon? Perhaps he was being given one more chance to find his destiny or whatever. Fortunately for Barry, while resetting your legal username has a 200 year waiting period, resetting your 'streaming' username can be done every, like, two months or something. (I could look it up but...I can't be bothered.) And so, Barry started his streaming channel "BarryIsStreaming" (a pun on his former last name and his new occupation), ready to create a virtual house for people of all kinds to enter and watch him play the unending stream of PAC-Man clones that the world continues to produce. And the rest, as they say, is history (Aka, I don't know where else to go with this.)
== Trivia ==
* It is reported that Barry has a long-term relationship and recent engagement to, far as I can figure, a bathtub filled with eggplants and sentience. Despite my lack of research into the matter, this claim remains unsubstantiated.
* Pwnbtdrn are also sometimes referred to as 'cute-humans-all-thoughtn't' or 'chat' for short.
*Barry's Pokemon Type is likely Fighting, as suggested by his weakness to Psychic damage and his love of bees (both bug and fighting are resistant to each other.) Barry is also resistant to rocks and darkness, just like Goofy. If Barry were to have a second type it would probably be Normal, as suggested by all the beige.
*Sources report that the writer of this page may or may not have made everything up because he was bored :)
== Amendment ==
In a unexpected and cruel twist of fate, Barry recently threw off the shackles of nominative determinism altogether, ascending to become the One True Barry, neither Isstreaming nor Kramer, thus making this entire "article" make NO SENSE. *sigh* At least I had fun ;)