Sixpack Pete

"Sixpack Pete" is a song featured in Pillaging for Your Dreams. Pirate Captain Sharon is trying to prevent her daughter, Karen, from falling for a pirate.
== Lyrics ==
Captain Sharon
You can love a seagull,
Or you can love the sea.
You can love the mist
That sprays on yer face,
And that'd be fine with me.
You can love the map and the compass,
If it's love and you desire it.
The only thing that you cannot love
Is a ruggedly handsome pirate!
Brittany
You've taken me away
On this ship.
This ship.
Both
This ship!
Brittany
You've taken me away
On this ship.
This ship.
Both
This ship!
Captain Sharon
The ship!
Brittany
It started as
A pleasure vacation ship,
But in the end, all I want
Is a relationship!
Captain Sharon
Well, you could love the dolphins...
Brittany (spoken)
No!
Captain Sharon
...that are constantly following us around.
Or you could love the tropical monkeys
That throw coconuts onto the ground.
Or you could love a...a narwhal!
Or shells that you can beat like they're a drum.
But ye can't fall in love
With Six-Pack Pete
And his six-pack tum.
Six-Pack Pete
Brittany, come over here!
Captain Sharon
Aw, damn it.
Six-Pack Pete
Take a look off the side.
Brittany
Yeah...
Six-Pack Pete
And also,
take a look at my jacket,
it's made of hide!
Brittany
Oooo!
Captain Sharon
Six-Pack Pete!
Six-Pack Pete
What?
Captain Sharon
I know what yer up to I suppose.
Ye think ye'll get
In me daughter's pants
With yer fancy pirate clothes.
Brittany
Oh you've...
Brittany
Taken me away on this ship,
Captain Sharon
Taken you away on this ship,
Both
This ship, this ship.
Brittany
You've taken me away on this ship,
Captain Sharon
I've taken you away on this ship,
Both
This ship, this ship.
Brittany
It started as a simple
Mother-daughter vacation ship.
Captain Sharon
And I don't want you
In a relationship
Old Crusty Stu
Oh, ow, I hurt my knee,
You know there's no pedophiles on the sea...
Captain Sharon
What?
Old Crusty Stu
It doesn't exist out here!
Just let me be with your daughter please!
Captain Sharon
Okay, first of all,
You straight up said "pedophile."
Which is not a thing
I would've even thought about
If you hadn't said it
With a big creepy smile.
Brittany
Yes, there's one thing
I don't understand,
I thought you
Were like an eighteen year old
Handsome deck hand...
Captain Sharon
No, that one's eighty-two.
Brittany
Oh, yeah.
Old Crusty Stu
Yeah! Come on over here and get on this grain sack with me! Please? Please.
Brittany
On the grain sack,
Old Crusty Stu,
I must say “no” to you,
but my one love, I will repeat,
as I cuddle up to young...
Captain Sharon
Nope.
Brittany
...Six-Pack Pete.
Captain Sharon
Leave room for Pirate Jesus.
Brittany
Pirate Jesus is very thin, we all know.
Captain Sharon
Ugh, fine.
Both
Relationship!
Brittany
Ship! Ship!
Captain Sharon
No dating.
Brittany
Hmmph.
Category:Songs