Escargoon

“	You'd better get it with a money-back guarantee!	„
 	~ Escargoon in the English opening. 	
“	Stupid commoners! 	„
 	~ Escargoon whenever he drives to Cappy Town in the Japanese dub.	
Escargoon (Escargon in the original Japanese version) is one of the two secondary antagonists (alongside Customer Service) of the anime series Kirby: Right Back at Ya! and a minor antagonist in Kirby Mass Attack.
He is King Dedede's right hand man who works with him to defeat Kirby once and for all but their plans always fail. He is very loyal to his boss but is not as menacing as King Dedede himself is.
He was voiced by Naoki Tatsuta in the Japanese version, and by Ted Lewis in the English version along with King Dedede.
== Appearance ==
Escargoon is an anthropomorphic snail who is Dedede's right hand man. His skin is lavender, and his shell is dark green. His eyes are green as well, and rise over the rest of his head on a stalk. He has short, light green hair and a goatee of the same color, and only four teeth. When he moves, he often makes a whirling noise.
== Personality ==
Escargoon has two distinct sides to his personality. There's the part of him that helps Dedede with his schemes and tricks, but he seems to have a genuinely nice side to him that only appears in extreme situations. Unlike most of the other residents of Cappy Town he does not dislike King Dedede, though the latter often whacks him with a mallet.
Escargoon's mannerism gives the impression of someone past his youth, and he tends to get grumpy with the children of the village. He can be very arrogant and cruel towards people in general, using his status as the King's assistant to lend him the right to boss people around or threaten them with the death penalty (in the Japanese version only). It is not clear whether he really is mean and only acts nice when he needs something, or if he has a good side of him that does not show because he is perpetually helping Dedede with his schemes in order to gain his approval. Since his mother says Escargoon is cowardly and would never hurt anyone, it would seem that the latter situation is more likely.
Escargoon can be cheerful and animated at times, and often does effeminate things such as wearing frilly aprons with hearts. (Other than that he rarely wears any articles of clothing, except an occasional bow tie, sun hat, or scarf in cold weather.) He is the usual host of Channel DDD for newscasts and special programs.
Escargoon is intelligent with a wide range of knowledge in botany (he wrote an encyclopedia on the subject called "The Encyclopedia of Botanica"), chemistry and electronics/robotics and even tried to decode an ancient scroll. When Dedede doesn't order something from Nightmare Enterprises, he tends to use one of Escargoon's inventions instead, such as a formula that turns things into monsters. In "The Empty Nest Mess" He builds various machines such as a robotic grasshopper, submarine, missiles, and even a robotic version of himself. However in "Fossil Fools: Part 1" when he and King Dedede were asked questions from Doctor Moro, they both were unable to give concise answers. Unlike King Dedede, he does not trust the N.M.E. Salesguy, and rarely orders things from him.
He also has a somewhat persuasive personality and a tendency to make comparisons and similes, as well as using higher vocabulary words and alliteration in his dialogue; for example, in "Pink-Collar Blues", he compares asking the Waddle Dees a question to "interrogating a mime troupe." and in "Waddle While You Work", he calls Dedede a "big blubbering blob of blubber".
== Trivia ==
* He makes a surprise appearance in the Kirby Quest sub-game of Kirby Mass Attack, alongside King Dedede in one of his attacks, where Dedede is carried by several Waddle Dees and tramples over Kirby. This is his only video game appearance to date.
* His English voice has a strong resemblance to late comedian Paul Lynde.
* He and Dedede are the characters shown animated in CG the most after Kirby.
* Despite being a snail, he can run fast, even though he once said that he's "not built for speed."
* At the start of "Kirby 3D, the N.M.E. SalesgGuy refers to Escargoon as "Lord Escargoon."
* Technically, Escargoon is the first character in the anime to visit Nightmare Enterprises since the N.M.E. Salesguy sent him there for a demonstration in "Abusement Park".
* In the Japanese version of Kirby: Right Back at Ya!, Escargoon has a habit of referring to himself with watakushi (an overly formal pronoun) when flustered or embarrassed.
* Much like King Dedede, Escargoon tends to incorporate many literary elements into his speech. Frequent alliteration and a larger vocabulary than what is usually heard in a children's show (such as referencing the philosophical theory of existentialism to Tiff from the episode "Hatch Me if You Can") are noticeable within his diction, though his word choice is usually not noted by any of the other characters, besides Dedede.
== Gallery ==