LoM Wargames - Ashley’s vs Philbrook’s

LoM Wargames is a theoretical wrestling matchup between two great families of LOM lore, the Philbrooks (the family of RoxyVelma), and the Ashleys (the family of Ashladdin). The epic fight was commentated (written) by Elyag.
==== The Story ====
==== Lineup: ====
* Ashley’s            Philbrook’s
* Father Ashley    LJP
* Dogkind               Shane O’phil
* Mother Ashley   Janet
* Dirty Dom            Lord of Sex Joe Philbrook
* Ashladin               ???
Pre match: Ashley family walks out first to walkout music (TBD), Kaine then walks out alone to ‘Welcome to the Black Parade’ by MCR. Philbrook family walks out to ‘Semi-Conservative Rap’ by Roxyvelma, only 4 members (who is the fifth???) Match ‘begins’: Starting two are Father Ashley with brass knuckles and LJP with a steel chair. LJP puts up a tough fight but Father Ashley is strong and lays the smackdown on LJP, things do not look good. Things only get worse, next entrant is Dogkind with the barbed wire baseball bat, LJP looks on the edge of death. Next entrant is Shane O’Phil with the steel trash can, things are thrown all over the place, Shane O’Phil does a coast to coast on Dogkind with the trash can, things aren’t great but are looking more even now. Next entrant is Mother Ashley with the kendo stick, an elegant weapon for a refined woman, match is not swung too far in either direction but Ashley’s still have numbers advantage and strength so it does not look very good for the Philbrooks. Janet comes screaming down to the ring and pulls a table out from underneath, lays the beatdown on anything that moves, Father Ashley gets put through the table TWICE. Next entrant is Dirty Dom, with a golf club, massively swings the tide of the fight, shots to the head for everyone. Next entrant is Lord of Sex Joe Philbrook, he brings down reinforced Nerf Reaper Shotguns, work both as projectiles but are used to batter everyone in sight.Next up is Ashladin with bottle of Sambuca in hand, gets into the ring and absolutely annihilates the Philbrooks, then proceeds to power up by consuming Sambuca, things look dire for the Philbrooks and they still have no fifth member. 
UNTIL
Glass break sfx. TELL YOU WHAT I WANT WHAT I REALLY REALLY WANT! KATIE MOSS RUNS DOWN TO THE RING WITH A BOTTLE OF PROSECCO AND TWO CHAMPAGNE FLUTES! THE CROWD DOES WILD! Katie Moss enters the ring, bell rings and the match is officially started, glass is shattered and the Ashley family goes down one by one until only Ashladin is remaining. Katie Moss locks Ashladin into the sleeper hold. Ashladin submits. The bell is rung and the match is over.
Postmatch: Next Monday on Monday Night LoM, Katie Moss comes out to officially announce her return.
Generic chinese music plays. A shadowy masked figure comes out to the top of the ramp, one we can only assume to be Louie, 3 months worth of build up lead to Wrestlemania, Hell in a Cell between Katie Moss and Louie. Hell in a Cell: Katie Moss with a resounding victory over Louie, Katie pulls off Louie’s mask to reveal. 
DREWEF!
It was Drew this whole time, Louie is still nowhere to be seen, where could they be?