Raising Trains

This is part of modern-futuristic Phyrrhia.
Hello, and welcome to Raising Trains, a restaurant with all of your asdf needs! I am the CEO, Starryeyes! No, we aren't affiliated with Taco Hell or Mcdragonalds! We have the best menu around! (However, we don't have any drinks.)
== Menu ==
A dead potato- Choice between stepped on or run over by a train. Only served mashed.
A gun-toting potato- Raising Trains is not responsible for damage or death to you or your dragonet. Seriously. This potato is EVIL.
A bagel- You CAN wait to eat this bagel. Poppyseed, French toast, Blueberry, or Apple Cinnamon.
A sandwich- Actually a dragon named Joey who thinks he's your sandwich. Flavors include RainWing, IceWing, or SkyWing.
A salad- Complete with The Salad Puncher. You actually probably won't be able to eat it unless you get rid of him.
Cheese- Throw this cheese at a UFO during an alien attack! Note: Not very effective.
Carrots- Freshly removed from a random guy's eyeballs! Eye gunk not included. They help with your eyesight!!
A burger- This burger used to be a cow! Ketchup and pickles included as toppings.
Another burger- This was puked up by a customer who wouldn't pay for her food. Lettuce, tomato, and bacon included as toppings.
A gun- Don't know why, but there are dragons who eat guns. If you eat guns, you should see a therapist.
A suicidal burger- Mr. Burger wants to die! Cheese included as a topping.
A burger that used to be a pie-flavored pie- We're confused, too. Not even we know how the heck it's possible.
Oh hey, another burger- This one was run over by a car. It's so smushed, we don't know what's on it.
Another sandwich- Someone parked their car on this sandwich. Turkey or ham and cheese.
Chicken strips- They're deep-fried and oily, perfect if you want indigestion for weeks!
== Dessert Menu ==
A pie-flavored pie- We baked you a pie! It's pie flavor!
A pie that used to be a guy named Billy- Billy wanted to be a pie. Blueberry flavored.
Muffins- Straight from the muffin factory! Chocolate chip or strawberry.
A suicidal muffin- Mr. Muffin also wants to die! Apple cinnamon flavored.
A banana- It's a banana gun. Don't point it at anyone. Once again, Raising Trains is not responsible for death to you or your dragonet.
Pineapples- These do not help with depression. Sorry not sorry.
More pineapples- These do not help with brain cancer. Once again, sorry not sorry.
Suddenly, more pineapples- These once activated a mine turtle. So they're in pretty bad shape.
Leymons- Goggles Guy is looking for these. Don't know what will happen once he finds them.
== Employees ==
* Starryeyes- A NightWing/IceWing. The overly cheery CEO who is a six-year-old dragonet who is nowhere near qualified for the job and cook who is even less qualified to be a cook.
== Reviews ==
Please review our restaurant! Seriously. Pretty please???
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