Epic Fanmade Rap Battles of History 58

The 58th installment of Epic Fanmade Rap Battles of History. It features novelist H.P Lovecraft and his giant monster, Cthulhu, against author J.R.R Tolkien and his hobbit hero, Bilbo Baggins. It was released March 2nd, 2014.
==Cast==
Mat4yo as H.P Lovecraft
Jacob S. as J.R.R Tolkien
Nathan Provost as Bilbo Baggins
Stofferex as Cthulhu
==Lyrics==
===H.P Lovecraft:===
Behold, John Tolkien, whose destestable lyircs,
Couldn't appeal to a soul, I won't stand being near this!
Your tales are dull, mine were the basis of horror,
I'm the master of mood, you're the master of torture!
You're going to die, and it won't be by fortune,
And your son won't be able to finish this battle for you!
I rocked the English language, you had to make up your own!
Your fans called you and annoyed you? Try unplugging the phone!
===J.R.R Tolkien:===
You may be called Lovecraft, but I hate your work,
I'm J.R.R Tolkien, the creator of Middle Earth!
Your raps are more of a failure than your wife's hat shop,
Call me Merry or Pippin from the way these beats drop!
Your mythos are maniacal, you think that'll get you laid?
I won't take crap from a guy who hardly went to fourth grade!
Shooting disses like Legolas, I'll be kicking your ass,
I'm bridging my way to victory, and you shall not pass!
===H.P Lovecraft:===
If you call yourself a man, I'll call you a liar!
I mean, you freaked out after being bitten by a spider!
You might have respect now, but your fans would scream,
If they knew your works were popular among Hitler's Regime!
Now you could bring out an assortment, a plethora of creatures,
Wizards and elves, abnormal people with hairy feet, you're,
Not prohibited from doing so, but keep this in mind,
If you're a true man, you'll keep this between you and I!
===J.R.R Tolkien:===
You, a real author? Please, you're cosmicsit swine!
And your ego is even bigger than Sauron's Eye!
But that's nothing compared to elephantoid nose,
You're not my boss, your work blows, Say hello to my friend with the hairy toes!
===Bilbo Baggins:===
Don't think I'm nothing but a spawn of Tolkien's pen,
If you fight me, I'll kick your ass There and Back Again!
The King has Returned, and he's standing quite tall,
I've got the one verse, Lovecraft, that's going to rule them all!
Straight outta the Shire, I spew rhymes like a fountain,
My accomplishments are more countless than the gold in the Lonely Mountain!
I've got courage, I'll fight anyone and anything,
So come at me, but beware, my rhymes can Sting!
===H.P Lovecraft:===
Oh John, you'll regret that, I almost fear for your safety!
For beating you shall now be like taking candy from a baby!
My rhymes will glow like your sword, hobbit, as I go right through you,
You're in for it now, say hello to Cthulhu!
===Cthulhu:===
These two pathetic Brits are about to be blackened!
I'm about to make Smaug look like Puff the Magic Dragon!
Not many get to see me so up close and personal,
But I've been summoned to destroy you and I shall not be merciful!
I've been lurking in the ocean just waiting for a meal!
You can't stop my wrath, I'll make a grown man squeal!
Your whole fanbase will go insane when they hear my call,
I'm appalled by your rhymes, so I'm ending this brawl!
===J.R.R Tolkien:===
You can't stop me, Howard, my works are classics,
Not even your octopus monster can do me any damage!
You never even published a book, aren't you so brave?
I've made more money from you just by lying in my grave!
Enough with the pen names, we all know who you are!
You couldn't be more of a pussy whereas I served in a war!
I'm the father of fantasy, you can't beat my creations,
I've messed you up and left you in utter Desolation!
<poll>
Who Won?
H.P Lovecraft and Cthulhu
J.R.R Tolkien and Bilbo Baggins
</poll>
Category:Epic Fanmade Rap Battles of History
Category:J.R.R Tolkien
Category:H.P Lovecraft
Category:Bilbo Baggins
Category:Cthulhu
Category:Mat4yo
Category:Jacob S.
Category:Nathan Provost
Category:Stofferex