Confessions In Chains

"Confessions In Chains" is a BOTGD 2 Act 1 thread written on June 21, 2019.
==Summary==
Milae confesses to Dario that he is scared of chains and dungeons after an encounter from his past left him helpless, and Dario encourages his emotional honesty.
==Full Text==
Yun Milae: The goat and the deer lay together in the spare home that Grey had graciously given Dario to stay in, but as tired as he was, Milae couldn’t sleep. He was worried about Akkey, he was worried about Frigga, he was worried about Vox and Liam and Kendra, he was worried about everything. But tonight, he was especially worried about himself.
He nuzzled close to Dario’s neck and exhaled softly through his nose, resigning himself to speaking his mind. “Dario?” he said softly. “I wish to ask something, I am…simply curious.”
Dario: He’d nearly dozed off, but the sound of Milae’s voice temporarily returned him from his rest. The goat spoke softer than he was used to. He felt his breath against his neck; this was one of his favorite ways to spend time with his partner.
“Of course, anything.” His reply was hoarse, but genuine. “Lay it on me.”
Milae: “Are you planning to assist in…breaking out the dungeons?” He shifted slightly; the fur of his chest was itching him. 
Dario: “That’s sporadic.” He felt the goat adjusting, seemingly restless against him. “I was… entertaining the idea, yeah. Figured I could be of some use to Vox and company, especially considering I was never around for… their dungeon, for lack of better terminology.”
He yawned, sinking his head down to look at Milae. “Were you not?”
Milae: “I feel like I must.” He traced the tip of his hoof across Dario’s chest, ruffling the blanket over both of them. Threads. “But I am…it feels too risky, for me.” He immediately felt foolish saying it. He knew himself well. He knew his limits, and he also knew how to push them. But the thought of a dungeon, the word itself…he was nervous, more than he had a right to be.
Dario: “Have you seen yourself?” He nudged his face with his own, giving the goat as wide a smile as he could muster with the energy he lacked. “If anything, I’m the one at risk. You can do anything.”
He knew there wouldn’t be reservations without reason when it came to Milae, and he needed to know why. 
“Are you alright, Milae? I don’t think I’ve heard you this concerned… especially for yourself.”
Milae: He was tempted to let it go and allow the both of them to drift into sleep, but the new emotional bond between him and Dario compelled him to be transparent.
“I hope this does not sound…too ridiculous…but…I am a bit afraid of…places of that nature,” he managed to get out, knowing he was being too vague. “B-but, you are probably right, I have little to fear from them…”
Dario: Dario’s heart ached for the goat. He’d never heard him vocally nervous about anything, let alone his own personal fears. It was progress.
“Hey, hey, you have every right to be afraid. That’s not ridiculous in the slightest. I don’t want to hear that.” He pulled the goat closer to him, hoping the tightened embrace would calm him. “This is good. Talking about these things helps. I can’t say that I’ve experienced dungeons in the capacity that others have, but I understand… captivity, if that makes sense.”
He needed to broach this carefully. He knew how easy it was for him to slip into panic over past events.
“What about them makes you afraid? There’s no answer that’s ‘ridiculous’.”
Milae: He tapped his own wrist, brushing the end of his scars. “Early into learning how to use my powers, I…made a stupid mistake. I was trapped by a group of half-breed hunters in the West. Normally that would not even be a bump in the road for me, but…they caught my arms and tied them behind my back.” He relayed the events quite blandly even though they were the source of his current anxieties, years and years and years later. “And just like that, I was trapped in that timeline. There was no way for me to escape without using these.” He lifted his forearm slightly and then let it fall back to Dario’s chest.
“Like I said, it was a stupid mistake,” he said quietly. “But I have never forgotten what it felt like. And I have tried not to make the same mistake again. Outwitted, a few times, perhaps, but I never let myself become so prideful as to forget that I could be stopped by such a simple thing as rope. And that sort of feeling…well. The thought of cells leaves a bad taste in my mouth, to say the least.”
Dario: The way Milae described being bound made Dario’s heart race.
Stop. Stop thinking about it.
“First off, thank you. I’m glad you felt safe enough to entrust me with that. I can say… I understand, what it’s like to be afraid of being trapped that way. It’s horrifying.”
You’ll never have to relive those days again. Breathe, you idiot.
Dario tried so hard to keep his heart from beating any harder. This was his time to show his support for his partner.
“If you don’t want to do it, stay back. I’m sure you’ll want some time away from me for a while, anyway. I would after this long.”
Milae: “I don’t want to leave you for longer than I already do.” He slid his hoof into Dario’s hand and gripped it gently. “Every time I leave, it can be months before I come back, but nothing to you.” He looked up at Dario with mournful eyes. “I learned from another mistake I made while you got to know who I was. I learned not to leave you alone. I want to protect you.”
He remembered, he remembered what it was like to crouch in the mud and in the driving rain, staying perfectly still and silent beside Vox, both of them weary with anxiety and sleeplessness and hours of intense focus, scouting, hiding, waiting, the only part of him moving being his thundering heartbeat, waiting for their opportunity to strike. The very first time it happened, Milae was caught off-guard and terrified, frenzied out of his mind. The second, he swore to stay behind no matter what. But in doing so, he almost didn’t make it to the third time. The fourth time, he began to fully understand, and the fifth time, he was riddled with the beginnings of something resembling survivor’s guilt, a burden he often carried by knowing who or what he needed to give up to ensure a future. But when that person was Dario, and when that future was merely Milae’s ability to return to the golden timeline to see him again…the sixth time crushed his spirit. There was no seventh time; he did not return to the site and time of the kidnapping ever again. He didn’t think he could handle it. But to continue being unable to know what Dario went through in Sylar’s talons because Milae was afraid of handcuffs felt much, much worse. 
Dario: “I hear you… but mistakes? I’m sure it couldn’t have been too bad. I mean, you’re here, and I’m here. That’s what counts.”
He found himself staring at the hoof in his hand; he was almost certain he could feel a slight tremble. Dario returned the grip reassuringly, with every desire to convey that he wouldn’t be abandoning him in any scenario.
“Then I won’t leave you, either. If it’s going to be too much for you, I don’t want to put you through a dungeon. That’s not fair to you. I’m not even sure I’m ready for that quite yet… I’ve been trying to get my magick back to being remotely helpful to anybody, but all I’ve managed to do is heal myself, and even that was exhausting.”
He laid his head back, exhaling loudly as he did so. He longed for adventure, and to help those who needed it most… but his partner was his first priority.
“I’m leaving it up to you, Milae. I will be here to support you in whatever you need.”
Milae: Milae kissed Dario’s cheek gently and hummed in thought, still unsure of himself. “I believe I will go…but I will avoid being within reach of any guards.” He gripped Dario’s fingers. It felt like a cop-out. But maybe it was a step closer to being less worried about prisons. “It wouldn’t hurt to loop the situation a few times as well, though I don’t have very many options when it comes to that, I am running out of timelines to experiment with the further we go…sorry,” he said quickly, as he came back to the present. “I will try to prepare, but in the end, I trust the Rebellion, and I trust who we have on our side.”
Dario: “If you’re sure. Hoping I have time to at least work on my own skills, even if it’s only a few hours.” He yawned, knowing that it wouldn’t be as soon as he would like. “For now, I think I’ll just keep you company.”
He nestled himself to fully embrace Milae, kissing the mass of hair that adorned his head. There were many things that could go wrong in the dungeon, but he had confidence in himself, his partner, and the Rebellion that had succeeded once. They could do it again.
Category:BOTGD 2
Category:Events
Category:Act I
Category:Yun Milae
Category:Dario Hjort