Twelve Days of Christmas

==It's Cold Outside==
===Baby, It's Cold Outside===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	It's that time of year again, everyone! The time where we shed our selfish shells in exchange for our selfless suits!
 	Floyd, that makes no sense, but it is starting to feel familiarly cold outside. Hmm, and I'm not seeing any Festivus decorations yet. That needs to change.Perkins! I'm feeling generous this year. Put up some Festivus decorations then invite all our neighbors here for a GIANT celebration! I want this to be epic!
 	Are you sure that's wise, sir? Most of our neighbors have their own celebratory events right now.
 	Yeah, well, ours is cooler so they should come join us.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	Looks pretty good, I guess. Could be shinier. Have the invites been sent? Any responses yet?
 	Yes sir, I sent the invitations out. I got an immediate response from Sheriff Colt and another response from Elder Taos just arrived. Both are coming to the Outpost to celebrate with us. Some others too.
 	Great! I want both of them to feel like their efforts are completely inadequate compared to an Imperial celebration! Really spread the cheer, you know?
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	I think we might have different definitions for "cheer".
===Non-Distinct Seasonal Hello===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	You invited us all the way up here and you don't even have any Winter Jubilee decorations up? I gotta say, I'm a might disappointed. I thought you wanted us to feel welcome.
 	Indeed, this is most discouraging. Not a single Flaming Pole tribute or Pit of Flames to acknowledge the Dawnbringer Feast.
 	This isn't panning out how I wanted it to. Perkins is the one who dishonored you guys, not me! Don't worry though, I'll force him to fix this.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	There we go! Now everything is fixed, and we can start the celebration! Who wants egg-nog? I know I do.
 	This is much more welcoming. I am reminded of walking the battlefield after a victory, stepping over the burning corpses of my fallen enemies. It fills me with joy. I thank you for this.
 	…OK then. What about you Sheriff? Reminded of any past grotesqueries?
 	You've done an admirable job here lieutenant. 'Course the trees look a little puny but I can overlook that this time.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	Once again, I've saved the day.
===Charity Case===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Decent enough shindig you got here, Morgan. But, some of the folks back home're wonderin' when those toys you promised for the kids are gonna arrive.
 	Uh...what?OH YEAH!We, uh, already sent those? I think we did at least…
 	That's strange seein' as how they never showed up.
 	Yes, that is indeed strange. I bet they were stolen... by some goons... along the way.We should send some more, but this time with some of our troops. For protection.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	Hostile Raiders have been eliminated from the immediate area, Lieutenant.
 	Toys have been made too, LT! I even shoved 'em all into a giant sack to make 'em easier to carry.
 	Just one giant sack? That seems inconvenient. Is it organized? How do you know which toys are which? You'd have to empty the whole thing…
 	Oh no, here he goes.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	Why not a bunch of smaller sacks?
===Right Down Your Chimney===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	All the gifts have been loaded up, sir. The truck is ready to go whenever you give the word.
 	OK, great. Let's get this over with. I'd like to get back to the party in time to actually enjoy myself a bit. I work myself too hard sometimes.
 	You do seem a little more tense than usual, Lieutenant.
 	I don't know. I guess I'm just a little stressed? I wanted this party to go off without a hitch so I could impress our neighbors, but that obviously isn't happening.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	No more enemies in sight, Lieutenant.
 	Ya dun good, kid. One disaster averted.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	I'm sure the rest of this party will go just fine.
===Seasons Greedings===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Anyone else noticin' things of theirs goin' missin'? I swear I brought an extra pair of gloves with me, but I ain't been able to find 'em since I got here.
 	LT? Some of my tools have disappeared from the Tool Shop.
 	Has anyone seen my bird-scented cologne prototype, "Soaring Sparrow: A Scent for Men"?
 	And my flask is missing. Great. OK folks! Keep calm! We may or may not have a serial burglar at the Outpost!Sheriff, you're a sheriff. Care to help us with the investigation?
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	What's this thing?
 	I thought you might benefit from some Imperial forensics tools to aid in your investigation of the crime scenes.
 	Why don't you hold on to that, and I'll let you know when I need it.Everyone listen up! We got tracks headin' in two directions. We're gonna need to split into a couple groups to follow 'em.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	I feel like a P.I. from one of my mystery novels!
===To Kill a Raptor===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	These tracks are leadin' us toward the Raptor Nest.
 	Oh perfect. Whoever we're hunting is probably now being hunted by deadly raptors as well.If we don't find them quickly, there might not be anyone left to arrest and punish.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	I'm not seeing any people, or parts of people. I'm guessing the criminal isn't here anymore?
 	Looks that way. I'm seein' some similar tracks to what I found at your Outpost headin' in this direction. Let me follow these a bit and I'll see where they're goin'.
 	Alright everyone! Give the Sheriff some room to work.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	I reckon I know where to head next.
===Don't be a Boar===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Alright folks! Follow me! We gotta track this thief down and the tracks are headin' toward the Boar Lands.
 	Lead the way Cassidy, we're right behind you. Be sure to tell me immediately if you see anything.
 	Really Ramsey, I think I can take care of a few boars. I been huntin' boars in these parts for most of my life.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	See Ramsey? Nothin' to worry about. Now, back to what we came here for. I'm seein' some more of those tracks and they're goin' back toward your Outpost.
 	Back? This thief must be a master of stealth. Is there anything else you're seeing?
 	No, we should probably get back now. No point in us standin' out here in the freezin' cold. We still got a thief to catch!
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	This guy better watch out!
==Snow Days==
===Snow Days===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Zoey? I've got some downtime and I want to do something fun. Since you're the only person around here that's about my age, I was wondering if you had any ideas?
 	Somethin' fun, huh? Well, I've been meanin' to build this sled prototype I thought up, but we'd have ta go someplace off-site to try it out.
 	Oh sledding! That sounds like a lot of fun! We could go to the Frozen Wasteland and sled for a bit then make it back before dark!
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	I made a pretty decent sled, if I do say so myself.Wow Zoey! What the heck is that thing?!
 	Just my prototype rocket-powered sled! With this, I won't have to get off the sled to get back to the top of the hill!
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	I sure hope my snow suit's fireproof.
===Government Plastic===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Perkins! Where do you think you're going at this time of day?
 	It's still morning sir, and I've got downtime until tomorrow. Zoey and I are going to the Frozen Wasteland to do some sledding.
 	Yeah, I don't like that idea. I can't have one of my most important assets wandering into potentially dangerous territory without an escort.
 	That's very thoughtful of you to think of me in that way sir.
 	You? Please! I'm talking about Zoey. You know, the one that builds strategic weapons and adds value beyond her mere existence? I'm going with you.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	Wow! This rocket sled's really movin'! Outta the way, Perkins!
 	Oh god! Stop chasing me with that thing!
 	Hey you two! Be careful!Watch out for those trees! Hey! Keep your hat on! You'll catch a cold!
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	These kids are gonna give me a heart attack!
===Hot Chocolate===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	That was really fun! Thanks for givin' me the idea, Perkins!
 	Oh sure! Anytime you want to—
 	Listen guys, we should head back soon. I'm getting cold and I'd rather not spend the night in the woods, in the snow, during the winter. Let's go get something to warm us up.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	I'm so sore now, and that hot chocolate made me want to sleep for a couple days straight.
 	Well, you have 6 hours until you're on duty again, so good luck with that.Don't be late. I want my boots shined to perfection before I go walking through this muddy Outpost tomorrow afternoon. I gotta get a solid 8 in first.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	What did I do in a past life?
==Twelve Days==
===A Peacemonger in His Riot Gear===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Enemy approaching, Lieutenant.
 	How many are we looking at?
 	Just one sir, looks like he means business too.
 	Just one? Really? This doesn't feel right. Are you sure there aren't any others, maybe hiding behind him?
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	A Peacemonger in his riot geeeaaar!
===Two Turtleshellers===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Ramsey, I see you standing there staring at me. What is it this time?
 	Two Turtleshellers, sir. Nothing else, either. Just two Turtleshellers.
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Two Turtleshellers!
===Three Mini Tanks===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Sir? We have more enemies approaching. More than last time too. Three Mini Tanks.
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Three Mini Tanks!
===Four Whirly-birds===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Silver Wolves approaching, sir! Four Whirly-birds!
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Four Whirly-birds!
===Five Golden Taaaaanks!===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Let me guess. Five of something?
 	Yep. Five Golden tanks rolling in.
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Five Golden Taaaaanks!
===Six Lightning Troopers===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	More enemies approaching. Six Lightning Troopers this time.
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Six Lightning Troopers!
===Seven Snipers Sniping===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Duck and cover, everyone! Seven Snipers sniping our troops!
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Seven Snipers sniping!
===Eight Minutemen Marching===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	More enemies, sir! Eight minutemen marching on the Outpost.
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Eight Minutemen marching!
===Nine Raider Boom Booms===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Raiders this time, sir. Nine Raider Boom Booms hucking dynamite.
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Nine Raider Boom Booms!
===Ten Ninjas Leaping===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Now we've got Ninjas, Morgan. Ten Ninjas leaping all over the place.
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Ten Ninjas leaping!
===Eleven Hunters Hunting===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission	Start mission
 	Hunters. Eleven of 'em. What could they be hunting here, though?
Reward screen	Reward screen
 	Eleven Hunters hunting!
===Twelve Thugs Thugging===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Twelve more enemies approaching. Silver wolves. Twelve thugs.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	OK, so that was fun. To recap, we just took down twelve Thugs thugging, eleven Hunters hunting, ten Ninjas leaping, nine Raider Boom Booms, eight Minutemen marching, seven Snipers sniping, and six Lightning troopers. What else was there?
 	Five Golden Taaaaanks! Four Whirly-birds, three Mini Tanks, two Turtleshellers —
 	And a Peacemonger in his riot gear.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	Great work everyone. I'm gonna go lie down.
==Over the Waves==
===Over the Waves and Through the Canal===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Alright Sheriff, where are the tracks headed this time?
 	Looks like they're headed this way, towards the shore. They seem to stop at the end of this dock. You know where any of these ships were headed?
 	Yes sir. Those ships go through the Reef Bandit fishing grounds territory.
 	Well, you might want to go out there and have a talk with 'em. Aren't those Reef Bandits known for stealin'?
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	Perkins? Do you have those flash cards we got from the translator, Karin? Try talking to the Chief, see what he knows.
 	The Chief doesn't know of any of his people stealing items from the Outpost. None of his people have been near it recently, according to him.
 	Well that's just swell. I guess we should head back now.
 	He also said he's insulted he wasn't invited to the celebration.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	Seriously? We've met him like, what, twice?
===Back to the Shack===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Ok we're back. Is anyone seeing anything? It doesn't look like the entire Outpost was looted while we were away, but everyone should check their stuff.
 	I found some more tracks. Looks like they're headin' this way, towards Ramsey's shack.
 	Oh no! I gotta make sure Mr. Purrface is OK!
 	Mr. Purrface looks fine, except… Wait a second. Why does Mr. Purrface have one of my gloves in his mouth? And what's all that stuff under your recliner?
 	Oh great. Looks like we found the culprit. Sorry everyone. Mr. Purrface was probably just trying to find me some Festivus gifts.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	Once again, sorry about Mr. Purrface. He doesn't know any better. He's just a good little kitty that likes shiny things.
 	Mrrrow?
 	See? He's really sorry too. Who's a fluffy little guy?
 	Well, this was certainly an interesting Festivus.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	So wait, it was an actual cat burglar?
===Cold Navy===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Captain Pike? What are you doing up here? Enjoying the winter of the Northern Frontier?
 	I wish that were the case, Lieutenant. While my home country isn't exactly warm, this type of winter is something we're not used to. I'm afraid we all may freeze to death without your assistance.
 	I'm sure we can give you a hand. And by "we" I mean not me.Floyd! Why are you never around when I actually want you to be? Help Captain Pike here not freeze to death.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	So, you really think boots are that important? I always thought of them as simply a means to keep my feet off the ground.
 	That's why you keep needing our help, Pike. Boots make the man. Without a good pair of boots on your feet, you face certain defeat. I'm not trying to make a cute pun either. I mean it.Also I hate puns.
 	Most intriguing, Lieutenant. I've always enjoyed a good pun myself.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	You're not making it easy to like you.
===These Boots Were Made for Shipping===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Hey Perkins! Radio Captain Pike and let him know we'll be arriving at his port shortly with his winter gear.
 	Yes sir. I'll let him know immediately.
 	Wait a second, did Pike post a few ships outside his port to meet us? What am I looking at here?
 	They look like Sovereign ships, Lieutenant. Looks like they're about to attack Port City.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	These boots are excellent, Lieutenant. What do we owe you for compensation?
 	Under normal circumstances, this is the point where I would try to con you out of a bunch of your money. But seeing as it's the season for giving, consider it a Festivus gift.
 	Festivus? I assume this is a winter tradition of yours? We have one of those as well we call 'Boxes Day'. People are encouraged to buy their friends and family gifts, and to put them in boxes as a surprise.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	Where do all these holidays come from anyway?
===Uninvited Guests===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Man, it's great to be back at the Outpost. I'm tired of always rushing to the aid of others. I say we impose some sort of base-wide non-interference policy. We can't be the police of everything.
 	It looks like some Sovereign ships followed us back to the Outpost, sir. Should I tell them we don't want to fight them and to leave us alone?
 	I mean, you can try, but I don't think they're gonna listen. I guess there's always the extremely slim chance they want to give us gifts for that Boxes Day thing Pike mentioned...
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	That took care of 'em, Lieutenant. I don't see anymore ships in the harbor, at least.
 	That's good news, Ramsey. OK, are we safe for a few minutes? Can I go lie down now?
 	We appear to be, yeah.
 	Great. Make sure nobody bothers me for a while, and have Perkins stand guard outside my bedroom.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	Tell him to shoot anyone that tries to wake me up.
===A Feast is a Feast===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Did you enjoy your nap, sir?
 	Yeah I did, surprisingly. It doesn't look like anything caught fire while I was asleep, either. And now I see Captain Pike approaching. Great. I wonder what catastrophe he needs help avoiding this time.
 	Lieutenant Morgan! My men and I wanted to thank you for your recent generosity, so we brought you all some Boxes Day gifts. We hope you enjoy them!
 	Oh wow, is that it? No life threatening problems, or hostile factions after you?
 	Well, there was one other thing. It's a Boxes Day tradition to celebrate the times with copious amounts of food and alcohol!
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	OK, I've officially had too much to eat. Someone... who am I kidding, Perkins, get a wheelbarrow and roll me out of here. I'm too full to move.
 	Yes sir, I just need to digest for a minute…
 	Your cabin boy appears to have dozed off, Lieutenant. Would you like me to top off your glass?
 	Don't have to ask me twice! For once, I can say that I'm glad you stopped by!
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	Happy Holidays, Outpost!
==Some Like It==
===Some Like it Hot===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Morgan, your energy consumption rate during this winter season is not sustainable. You have to cancel at least two of your showers throughout the day.
 	Hey, if you have a better idea for how I can create a nice steamy environment in my private washroom, then I'd like to know. Or maybe you can you build me a sauna instead?
 	I lack the resources, and desire, to build you a personal sauna. There are other alternatives though. The Spiderwasp caves, for instance, act like a natural sauna.
 	Yeah, they're also full of lava and deadly, deadly spiderwasps.
 	Oh, you big baby. Just bring some of your troops with you. Most of the spiderwasps were eliminated by your soldiers anyway. I doubt you would run into much trouble.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	Perkins! Are you ready to act as my look-out while I'm enjoying a nice steam?
 	Yes sir, but why do I have to wear this bathrobe? Shouldn't I still be in my uniform?
 	Nonsense! It's a "natural sauna" Perkins, and you know the rules. Appropriate attire for every situation. Rule #137 of the Imperial Handbook.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	I think this might be a ladies bathrobe...
===Steam Clean===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Wow, these caves are a lot warmer than I remember them being. Hurry up, Perkins! Be prepared to fire at ANYTHING you see with more than four limbs and a head!
 	Yu.. Yes ss.. sir. Just nn… need to warm up a b...bit.
 	Yeah, you probably should have waited to change into the slippers and bathrobe until after we got here. You know it's winter, right?
 	B...but, yyou s...said…
 	Oh crap! I honestly believed Floyd when he said we probably wouldn't see any spiderwasps. Yet here they are. Fan out men!
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	Well, wonderful. Now I have bug-juice all over my slippers and bathrobe. I'm going to need a new one, thanks Perkins.
 	I didn't bring any extra sets, sir. And If I give you mine then what am I going to wear?
 	Just put your uniform back on and take a few demerits. Also, make a note for me to chastise Floyd when we get back. He was totally wrong about the spiderwasps being gone.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	How dare he predict something incorrectly!
===Cooldown===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	OK, I'm done with this place. These caves are officially too hot. I thought I'd enjoy my journey to become a human piece of jerky, but this isn't fun anymore.
 	Should we head back to the Outpost, sir?
 	Yeah, let's get going, and radio ahead. I'll be needing an appropriate snack when I get back. Something to cool me off.I'm thinking a snow cone.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	How's your snow cone, sir?
 	This stuff is really cold, you know that? Whose idea was it to have a snow cone prepared for me during the winter, anyway? The whole point of going to those caves in the first place was to warm up.
 	I believe it was your ide—
 	Stop Perkins, I've remembered that I don't care.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	Oh, and warm up my snow cone.
===They Came Back!===
Dialogue 	Dialogue
Start mission 	Start mission
 	Floyd? Do you hear that strange buzzing sound?
 	Yes I do, but I can't tell what could be making it…Oh no. Spiderwasps! They must have followed Morgan and Perkins back from the caves!
 	Hey Ramsey! What's that weird buzzing noise? Is Zoey building something bee related?Oh nevermind, I see them. It's just a swarm of terrifying, deadly creatures.
Finish mission	Finish mission
 	Floyd, I'm going to guess that the spiderwasps showing up here wasn't a coincidence. Any idea what happened or how they could have made it this far?
 	I was curious myself, so I took a look at the bathrobes and slippers you brought back with you. They seem to be covered in the remains of spiderwasps that, I assume, you dispatched in the caves.It seems the viscera of the spiderwasp acts as a pheromone attractor for other spiderwasps, signalling them that there is danger. They must have followed the trail all the way back to the Outpost looking for the threat.
Reward screen 	Reward screen
 	So it's Perkins' fault for not wanting to litter...
==Gallery==
File:Christmas LTM.png|Promotional splash graphic.
Category:Missions