The Gyurcsány Show

The Gyurcsány Show is the second episode of The SpongeBob and Viktor Orbán Show. It was released on March 14, 2022 and was written by .
== Transcript ==
[Lobster productions logo; the episode begins with SpongeBob sleeping in a house. He suddenly wakes up, and stands up. He walks outside and takes a look at the Parlament.]
SpongeBob: Wow, the Parlament. It’s so beautiful. (sighs) I miss my life in Bikini Bottom. I wonder how Patrick is doing without me.
[Bubble transition to Patrick in SpongeBob’s house.]
Patrick: Life sure has been boring without SpongeBob. What am I gonna do now? I don’t have any other friends.
[Gary slithers in.]
Gary: Mr. Star, this is not your house. Get the fuck out of here.
Patrick: OKAY! No need for swearing.
[Patrick walks out of the house.]
Gary: That bloody git comes into this fucking house every day. He makes me really knackered. That utter buffoon just grinds my gears so much…
[Patrick walks back.]
Patrick: You know that I heard all that, right?
Gary: Oh dear, it was rather foolish of me to talk like that out loud, innit bruv?
Patrick: Gary I think you had too much tea.
[Cut to Orbán tired in the Parlament.]
Orbán: I am tired.
[Orbán looks out the window and stares at the Danube.]
Orbán: Wow, this lake is really beautiful. Its blue waters are just the prettiest things in the world. It would really be perfect, if it wouldn’t be full of trash. And dead bodies. A lot of people commit suicide around here, and I don’t know why. I’m a great leader! And because of how great a leader I am, I am going to raise the payment of the prime minister by a few million Forints. And to stop all the suicide, I will order to destroy the bridge, because I am so unselfish! But now I am going to eat.
[Orbán grabs a Carte d'Or ice cream packaging with Goulash in it.]
Orbán: Yum! I sure do love Goulash! Wait, what’s this?
[Orbán puts his hand into the Goulash and pulls out a Túró Rudi.]
Orbán: That’s even better!
[Suddenly a man enters the office.]
Orbán: Who are you?
[Cut to SpongeBob walking down a street.]
SpongeBob: Now where could that Italian restaurant be?
[SpongeBob spots an Italian restaurant and goes inside.]
SpongeBob: Good morning! I want a pizza.
Worker: I’m sorry, but there’s no pizza left.
SpongeBob: What? But this is an Italian restaurant! How is there no pizza?
Worker: An orange cat ate all of it.
SpongeBob: …What?
Garfield: Sorry dude, but I was hungry.
SpongeBob: And this is Hungary.
[SpongeBob walks out and continues walking on the street; cut back to Orbán.]
Orbán: Who are you?
[The man is revealed to be Gyurcsány.]
Orbán: Gyurcsány! I thought you were an immigrant! The torn and dusty Gucci jeans fit perfectly on your feet, your grey Chanel hoodie slips on your belly to a level where your abs that you carefully paint on every morning are visible. You messed up your face with your daughter's brown watercolour and graphite powder. You didn’t comb your hair, although we are used to it by now. And of course, you are holding the newest Iphone 19 in your hand, like a real migrant.
Gyurcsány: Indeed.
Orbán: mi a faszért van ez a gecis szar még mindig rajtad feri baszd meg (why the fuck is this fucking shit still on you feri oh my god)
Gyurcsány: BECAUSE IT FITS ME  AND YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND FASHION AND IT IS MY RIGHT TO DRESS AS I WANT AND YOU DO NOT RESPECT THIS RIGHT THEREFORE YOU ARE A EVIL AND I’M TELLING MOM
[Gyurcsány runs away crying.]
Orbán: Damn, I didn’t even get to steal his phone.
[SpongeBob enters the room.]
SpongeBob: Hey Viktor, what are you doing?
Orbán: I made Gyurcsány cry.
SpongeBob: That’s… Cool, I guess.
Orbán: I hope that won’t lead to any bad consequences. Anyway, I have to compliment Putin now so he won’t bomb us.
[Cut to Gyurcsány in a studio.]
Gyurcsány: Okay guys, we need to film some propaganda!
Gergely Karácsony: Why?
Gyurcsány: Because Orbán said my fashion was bad, WHICH IS WRONG!
Gergely: Oh okay.
[The Gyurcsány Show theme song starts playing.]
Gyurcsány: My name is Ferenc Gyurcsány,
And I am proud to be,
Right back in my hometown,
With my new family.
There's old friends,
And new friends,
And even tax increasing!
Through good times,
And bad times,
It's true money I have!
And so I found a place,
Where everyone will know,
My Mini Feri face,
This is The Gyurcsány Show!
[Gergely starts the camera.]
Gyurcsány: Hey guys, Ferenc Gyurcsány here, and today I am going to make a rant video about  Viktor Orbán. He said my fashion was bad, WHICH IS WRONG! He’s gay. That’s it. Rant over. Thanks for watching and remember to like and subscribe.
[Gergely stops filming.]
Gergely: You know, Gyurcsány, that wasn’t very good. I have a better script.
Gyurcsány: Really? Let me read it.
French Narrator: About half an hour later…
Gyurcsány: Okay, I got this!
[Gergely starts filming again.]
Gyurcsány: I’ve come to make an announcement. Viktor Orbán is a BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCKER! HE PISSED ON MY FUCKING WIFE! THAT'S RIGHT. HE TOOK HIS GAY FUCKIN' GOULASH DICK OUT, AND HE PISSED ON MY FUCKING WIFE, AND HE SAID HIS DICK WAS "this big" AND I SAID THAT'S DISGUSTING. SO I'M MAKING A CALLOUT POST ON MY TWITTER DOT COM. VIKTOR ORBÁN, YOU GOT A SMALL DICK. IT'S THE SIZE OF THIS WALNUT EXCEPT WAY SMALLER, AND GUESS WHAT. HERE'S WHAT MY DONG LOOKS LIKE. THAT'S RIGHT, BABY. TALL POINTS, NO GOULASH, NO PILLOWS, LOOK AT THAT IT LOOKS LIKE TWO BALLS AND A BONG. HE FUCKED MY WIFE, SO GUESS WHAT, I'M GONNA FUCK THE EARTH. THAT'S RIGHT, THIS IS WHAT YOU GET! MY SUPER LASER PISS!!! EXCEPT I'M NOT GONNA PISS ON THE EARTH. I'M GONNA GO HIGHER. I'M PISSING ON THE MOON!!! HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT JÁNOS ÁDER!? I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!!! YOU HAVE 23 HOURS BEFORE THE PISS DROPLETS HIT THE FUCKING EARTH, NOW GET OUT OF MY FUCKING SIGHT BEFORE I PISS ON YOU TOO!
[Gergely stops filming.]
Gergely: That… Was beautiful.
Gyurcsány: I know, right?
Soros: This will surely convert all the Orbán fans!
Gyurcsány: Surely!
[Cut to Orbán talking to Putin.]
Orbán: Hey Putin, what are you doing?
Putin: Nothing much, just sending some more soldiers into Ukraine.
Orbán: That sounds… Great…
Putin: I know, right?
Orbán: Yeah…
Putin: Do you want to eat something?
Orbán: Like what?
Putin: Vodka.
Orbán: You can’t eat Vodka, you can only drink Vodka.
Putin: NO DISRESPECT! CORRECT ME ONE MORE TIME AND HUNGARY WILL BE GONE!
Orbán: Sorry, let’s eat Vodka.
Putin: Okay!
[Cut to Orbán with SpongeBob again.]
SpongeBob: So how did the meeting go?
Orbán: I think I ate too much Vodka.
[Orbán faints.]
SpongeBob: ORBÁN NO!
[Gyurcsány jumps in through the window.]
Gyurcsány: HA! Look at that! The fat bastard is dead!
SpongeBob: How dare you call this beautiful man a fat bastard?! I will hit you!
[SpongeBob hits Gyurcsány but it doesn’t hurt him at all.]
Gyurcsány: …
[Gyurcsány turns on his camera.]
Gyurcsány: Yo what is up everyone, the fat bastard Viktor Orbán is fucking dead! Ding dong, the bitch is dead!
SpongeBob: Well that isn't very nice!
Gyurcsány: I don’t care.
[Gyurcsány jumps out the window and breaks his leg.]
Gyurcsány: (offscreen) MY FUCKING LEG!!!
SpongeBob: Viktor, please wake up!
[Orbán wakes up.]
SpongeBob: Huh it actually worked.
Orbán: wuh happun
SpongeBob: You fainted and then Gyurcsány was here but he’s not here anymore and he broke his leg.
Orbán: That’s great.
SpongeBob: Yeah. Well, I’m gonna go now, I assume you have important things to do.
Orbán: Eh, not really.
[SpongeBob starts leaving.]
SpongeBob: Well bye, Viktor!
Orbán: Bye, SpongeBob!
[SpongeBob leaves.]
Orbán: What a nice guy. Well now I’m going to watch porn again.
[Credits roll.]
Category:2022
Category:2022 Episodes
Category:2022 Transcripts
Category:Episodes
Category:Episode transcripts
Category:Transcripts
Category:Zoltan40
Category:Lobster Productions
Category:2020s
Category:The SpongeBob and Viktor Orbán Show
Category:Blue Lobster Productions