Suitors, Inc. (short story)

Suitors, Inc. was the fourth short story in the Short Trips anthology Short Trips: Seven Deadly Sins. It was written by Paul Magrs. It featured the Fourth Doctor, Romana II and K9 Mark II.
== Summary ==
Romana is enjoying a trip to the hair salon when she hears the hairdresser and a customer discussing Suitors, robots that provide certain services for elderly ladies. They also discuss missing pensioners that have been linked to the Suitors. She is shocked when the customer, Maude, calls the robot a "DoctorBot", and her suspicions are confirmed when K9 finds a magazine advert showing a picture of a Suitor — it perfectly resembles the Doctor.
Back in the TARDIS, the Doctor's reaction is as Romana feared: he is pleased. When he takes her out to dinner, she scolds him and is annoyed when another diner asks for his autograph. While they are out, K9 traces power surges at a nearby factory called Wildthyme Unlimited.
At the factory, two amateur detectives sneak in to investigate the robots, who resemble an old friend of theirs whom they haven't seen in years. Once they are inside, however, Sarah and Harry are found and chased by several DoctorBots. Iris is informed when the two are captured.
In the TARDIS, the Doctor, Romana and K9 investigate. Harry and Sarah are brought before Iris, who introduces them to the new version of DoctorBot, which to Sarah's shock resembles the Third Doctor.
The Doctor, at the factory, disables one of the DoctorBots and switches coats with it. He sneaks inside, leaving Romana and K9 to patrol the perimeter of the factory. They make plans to jam the robots' signals and head back to the TARDIS.
As Harry and Sarah are marched back to their cell, they realise their robot captor is the real Doctor, and they hug. Meanwhile, Iris contacts Madame Binky by viewscreen, and Binky demands more elderly ladies or she will destroy Iris' TARDIS.
The Doctor, Harry and Sarah are confronted by the newer version of Suitor, which is an expert in karate.
Romana and K9 return to the factory with their new device, prepared to jam the signals received by the robots. However, when they arrive, they find that a portal to Binky's planet is open, and the Doctor, Harry, Sarah and Iris are marching into it. Romana and K9 are drawn into the portal as well.
== Characters ==
* Fourth Doctor
* Romana II
* K9 Mark II
* Iris Wildthyme
* Sarah Jane Smith
* Harry Sullivan
* Madame Binky
* Maude
* Andre
== Worldbuilding ==
* There's mention of Robin Hood, and the 22nd century Dalek invasion.
* K9 scanned the contents of Cosmopolitan magazine.
* Romana and the Doctor drink Pinot noir and they eat tagliatelle.
* Iris Wildthyme had purple hair.
* K9 considers and rejects various suspects, which he had put on cards, including: Sutekh the Destroyer, Davros, Omega, Mehendri Solon, Morbius, the Black Guardian, the Master and Azal before finally settling on Iris.
* The Doctor likens the monstrous enemies cards to Top Trumps.
* The Doctor decides not to involve UNIT in his investigations.
== Notes ==
* This story was reprinted in Short Trips: Re:Collections.
* The stories in Short Trips: Seven Deadly Sins are based on the Christian concept of . This story's theme is lust.
* Each paragraph has a sub-heading.
== Continuity ==
* Pussyworld was mentioned in PROSE: Mad Dogs and Englishmen.
* Later in her personal timeline, Iris met the Third Doctor and Jo Grant in England in the 1970s. She told him that she had previously encountered his future self while he was travelling with "a blonde girl" and "a robot dog." (PROSE: Verdigris)
* Sarah Jane recalls previously meeting Iris in PROSE: Old Flames.
Category:Fourth Doctor short stories
Category:K9 short stories
Category:Sarah Jane Smith short stories
Category:Short Trips: Seven Deadly Sins short stories
Category:Stories set in 1979
Category:Stories set in Great Britain
Category:Iris Wildthyme short stories
Category:Romana I short stories
Category:Short Trips: Re:Collections short stories