The Incident (Squidward at the Hospital)

"The Incident" is the first episode of the short series and spin-off, Squidward at the Hospital. It first aired on the YouTube channel for Solstice on 27th May, 2020.
== Synopsis ==
SpongeBob, whilst being hurried to hospital, explains the events leading up to his hospitalisation.
== Transcript ==
* No title card or introduction. Instead, the first shot is a bird’s eye view of SpongeBob being rushed to a room in the hospital, being carried on a stretcher by identical nurses, who unlike Squidward, who is circling the nurses, panting and sweating intensely, are very calm. SpongeBob is in two halves, with bruises all over his face. His iconic SquarePants are ripped into shreds, and the one eye that is open is bloodshot, the other covered in dirt. One of the nurses, with a strong English accent, stops Squidward from running another lap around the stretcher.
* Nurse: Listen, squid, I know you care dearly about your friend, but we are trying to concentrate.
* Squidward: I don’t care about that idiot, I just don’t want to get fired! 
* Nurse: You disgust me.
* She slaps Squidward’s nose, which bounces back and hits him on the head so hard that he falls into the wall.
* Nurse: Come on, girls. Let’s get poor SpongeBob here to a hospital bed.
* Her words echo as we zoom back into SpongeBob’s face. We can hear his thoughts.
* SpongeBob: You’re probably wondering how it got to this point. Well, it’s a long story. You sure you wanna hear it? 
* Silence.
* SpongeBob: Well, I’ll just tell you anyway. 
* SpongeBob does his signature obnoxious laugh as we fade into a scene at the Krusty Krab. We see Squidward and SpongeBob, both in their work clothes, being commanded by Mr. Krabs (only his claw is seen).
* SpongeBob: (voiceover) It all started when Mr. Krabs told us that we could go on a vacation - but not just any vacation, the best kind of vacation: a work vacation! We were going to research McDolphin’s, the successful fast food chain beneath the coast of England, and see why they were doing so well. Krabs gave us these spy outfits for some reason (Krabs gives them the spy outfits in the flashback) and we were told to take the train all the way to the Isle of Wight, where famous short film director SpongeBot678 lives. Apparently, he had the inside scoop on McDolphin’s and their cost-efficient burger production. 
* We hear Mr. Krabs laugh in the flashback before it cuts to SpongeBob and Squidward on the train. SpongeBob is listening and singing along to the theme song of the original show.
* Squidward: God, listening to your own theme song. It can’t get any more selfish than that. 
* Squidward takes out his phone and looks at Photoshopped pictures of himself where he looks incredibly attractive.
* SpongeBob: (enthusiastically) Squidward, can’t you see the fun in this road trip?
* Squidward: (deadpan) No.
* SpongeBob: Well, if you don’t, I guess I’ll just find someone else on this train that does!
* We zoom out; there is no-one on the train and every seat except SpongeBob’s and Squidward’s is completely empty other than dust and cobwebs.
* Squidward: Good luck with that. Ha!
* SpongeBob: Well, I could always talk to the train driver.
* A thought bubble appears from Squidward’s head, consisting of a mathematical formula: “SPONGEBOB + TRAIN DRIVER = CRASH”. Squidward smiles and pops the thought bubble.
* Squidward: You know what? That’s a great idea, SpongeBob! You should go and talk to him.
* SpongeBob: (voiceover) Turns out it wasn’t that great of an idea after all.
* Cut to SpongeBob in a dark room, with only his eyes visible.
* SpongeBob: Hello? Train driver man?
* The lights suddenly turn on and SpongeBob gasps.
* SpongeBob: (voiceover) It was him.
* A green fist hits SpongeBob, and we cut to Squidward admiring himself in a mirror as SpongeBob shrieks in pain from outside. We hear muffled punches and slicing sounds.
* SpongeBob: (muffled, from outside the train) Squidward! Help! It’s D-- 
* SpongeBob is thrown into a nearby window, and the train driver is revealed to be Dennis. He threatens a now shocked Squidward.
* Dennis: You saw nothing, punk.
* Dennis runs away and we cut to him calling for an ambulance - quite literally.
* Dennis: Hello?! Anyone here? There’s been an accident!
* Cut to Squidward in the train looking at SpongeBob through the window.
* Squidward: SpongeBob?
* The nurses arrive in an ambulance and pick SpongeBob up from the ground, carrying him on a stretcher. Dennis is now nowhere to be seen.
* SpongeBob: (voiceover) Squidward wasn’t really trying to hurt me, he was just trying to be a good friend, and I’m sure he knows that. He’s a smart squid after all. He’s probably at the Krusty Krab serving customers and delivering those juicy Krabby Patties as usual.
* Fade back to the hospital. SpongeBob is laying unconscious, eyes closed, on a hospital bed, hooked up to life support, and the lights are dim. Squidward arrives, with his nose covered in bandages, holding seaweed, in a bunch as if they were flowers, and drops them on an unresponsive SpongeBob.
* Squidward: I got your favourite.
* Squidward sits down on the chair next to SpongeBob and sighs. The episode ends and fades to black. The credits then roll.Category:Squidward at the Hospital
Category:2020
Category:2020 Episodes
Category:2020 Transcripts
Category:Solstice
Category:BBC
Category:JustInCaseTheDingusRunsAway
Category:Episodes written by Mrs Chanandler Bong
Category:JustInCaseTheDingusRunsAway
Category:2020s