Phil Gilbert

"God, I just had to meet with the head and his pet ape, Gilbert" 
"What a tosser, I mean, oooh, I'm Mr Gilbert, I'm such a big huge massive freak, and I just love to suck the headmaster's balls!" - Will McKenzie enlightening fellow pupils on Gilbert's poor street cred. 
== Description ==
Phil Gilbert, referred to most of the time as 'Mr Gilbert', was the head of sixth form at Rudge Park Comprehensive, standing as an antagonist to the force of Will McKenzie. Depressed and a misanthropist, Gilbert would often take pleasure in humiliating Will, such as sending him to work in a garage, an environment deadly to the character of someone like Will.
When the rapture occured creating Cockovania, Gilbert underwent serious psychological damage as a result. The rapture damaged him enough mentally to the point where he was rendered borderline vegetative. Until he hung himself two weeks later, all Gilbert did was demand that people say his name properly, it being 'Mr Gilbert', spiting anyone who actually said it correctly as 'Phil Gilbert', ironically.