Awkbird: Pilot

This is a original story by butahbuh 
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"Sir, wake up you have another confrontation with the police." Exclaimed worker number 1
"Where are the rocks i want to bash a neighbors window Natalie!" Yelled worker number two
"Quiet the cops are here!" Natalie (worker number one) Exclaimed
"Fine, but if he gets caught im taking his money!" exclaimed worker number 2
"hes awake finally." Exclaims worker Natalie
"where the f*** am I?" exclaims awkbird
"Home, duh just give her the rocks and it'll stop" Said Natalie
Awkbird gets up and walks to the patio.
"Your brains sh** get a new one" Awkbird asks while throwing money on the ground
"now go kick rocks" Awkbird exclaims
"Up yours little bird!" Exclaims worker number two
"Maybe i'll legally change your name back too sarah when im impressed with your actions!"
The director recording awkbird bumps into a sharp counter side
"Hey look, I found someone dumber than you." awkbird says
awkbird sits in front of a camera
"Lets clear the air I'm a bird, a Great Titmouse quit laughing or i'll change your smirk with your arm." Awkbird said
"I'm Natalie and my dad is awkbird i was good so my dad gave me my name back he has a short temper and isn't a great person." Natalie said
"Im worker number two (Sarah) and I am Awkbirds daughter too i throw rocks at windows and yeah that's me" worker two says