S03E02 - Ass-thetics 101

The story for this season is "The Critiquer" by dysonrules. This episode continues on Part one of the story.
== Episode Summary ==
Harry meets a few of his new classmates and Draco remains unimpressed with the quality of dick pics in the world.
== Notable Moments ==
* The third evil twin, Rughorn, is born.
* Lyndsay has performed some census taking and data analysis to try to shed some light on the splooge vs. spooge debate.
** current status: 91% splooge
** Allie seems to think "Detroit and Canada" is one area.
* Other proposed ratings for dick pics: TMB = Too much balls, BB = Bad Background, NHE = Not hard enough, HSIC = Holy shit it's crooked, NA = Nice Angle, U = unsolicited, TBNT = Thanks, but no thanks.
* Divination is the least employable Hogwarts subject
* Waking up after a night of drinking and dick pics: Well Hungover
* Allie saying "cack" a lot.
* Gasping Lyndsay
* Harry's cock looks like a desensitized cucumber...?
* "That's how I feel about this podcast. It's not porn, it's just above porn. It's comedy. Sure Nana's friends, I'll tell you about my podcast." ~ Danny
* Allie has a brain fart while reading. Third time (after a gigglefest) is the charm.
* The hosts joke they should use the sorting hat to sort the photography students into what type of photography they're doing (portraiture, landscape, dick pics, etc.)
* Allie predicts that Harry will go into business with Draco by the end of the story.
* Lyndsay completely spoils the ending of My Best Friend's Wedding
* Allie informs people about "olming" (sp?) which is apparently joint masturbation that was being pitched to office workers? I could find no Google references to this. Possible Allie dreamt it up.
** However I did find reference to ollning, en: The act of touching an object with your penis. This is apparently a Swedish thing? olla: "ollon" is the Swedish word for "glans".
== Wands Up or Down ==
Allie: Up
* Excited, love the build up and that Harry is ready to learn
Danny: Up
* Likes the overlapping perspectives.
Lyndsay: Up
* Not aroused, but digging the tension.
== Potterotics Shout Outs ==
* Amy Joy reignited the splooge vs. spooge debate on the FB group
* Voicemails played from Sarah (shares excitement about Drarry pairing), Paige (hypothesizes why people don't like Ron), Amber (calls in drunk to gush about the podcast and to demand a tour).
Category:2017
Category:Reader: Allie
Category:Episodes
Category:Season 3
Category:3 Wands Up
Category:Lyndsay: Up
Category:Allie: Up
Category:Danny: Up