An Unexpected Arrival

An Unexpected Arrival is the thirty-ninth episode of Cult of Squid. It aired September 25th, 2020, and was written by Locknloaded23.
== Transcript ==
(Episode opens with a shot of The Feathered Friends in the Krusty Krab, all discussing something)
SpongeBob: …and that's how I got that seaspider off my wall!
Plankton: oh, brother.
(Krabs walks in with a paper)
Krabs: boyos! Look what I found!
SpongeBob: what is that?
Krabs: it's an old flyer from 2018 we tried to use to recruit members! 
Patrick: I remember that, I ate 5 of those!
SpongeBob: lemme see that!
(The flyer has a picture of Spongebob in a chicken costume in a triumphant pose, and it had big text saying "TIRED OF THE CULT KILLING EVERYONE YOU LOVE? JOIN THE FEATHERED FRIENDS!." The flyer is dated "July 17th, 2018")
SpongeBob: maybe we can get new recruits if we send these flyers out!
Krabs: (opens window, throwing the flyer out) done n done.
SpongeBob: now we've gotta wait. Anyone down for chess?
Plankton, oh, me, me! I love a game of chess! 
SpongeBob: I call white!
Plankton: damnit!
(Zoom out from the Krusty Krab, where we see the flyer being blown in the wind. It heads towards a bottomite's house, and we it zooms into the house as we hear a voice from the inside)
Unknown voice: LARRY! LARRY!
(slowly zoom into the Bottomite's destroyed house)
Voice: Larry!!
(Fade to the house's basement, where a depressed Larry sits in the corner, and a few background fish are sitting next to him. The door slowly opens, letting in vast amounts of light)
Larry: what do you want?! 
(Bubble Bass runs down the stairs and next to Larry)
Bubble Bass: Larry, the Cult just defeated Satan, and now possess a blade from Hell!
Larry: they beat them AGAIN?! 
Bubble Bass: unfortunately, yes.
(A smile slowly grows on Larry's face, as he slowly begins laughing)
Bubble Bass: uh, is everything okay, Larry?
Larry: (calm, quiet voice) 2 years.
Bubble Bass: what?
Larry: for 2 years, we've tried to stop the cult. 2 long, painful years. And now they beat Satan again, and possess an all-powerful demon blade. (Begins laughing harder) 
Bubble Bass: Larry, you're freaking me out, man!
Larry: (insanely happy voice, shouting, startling Bass) DON'T YOU SEE! 2 YEARS! 2 YEARS WASTED! WE COULD'VE HANDED OURSELVES OVER BUT NO, 2 YEARS WE'VE TRIED TO STOP THEM AND FAILED! ISN'T THAT FUN?! (yelling) DON'T YOU LOVE IT?! (laughs maniacally)
Background Fish: Larry, are you-
(Larry tackles the fish and begins punching them over and over, still laughing. When the fish dies after one final big punch, Larry slowly turns around with bloodshot eyes. Everyone else backs away slowly)
Larry: WHO WANTS TO EXPERIENCE THE SWEET RELEASE AS HE DID? DEATH IS THE ONLY WAY OUT! (Suddenly calms) death is the only way? (Laughs as he slowly lifts his left claw. After staring at it for a while, he puts his claws to his throat, prompting everyone to try and pull them away. When they succeed, he laughs even harder, prompting everyone to run out in fear)
(Cut to Bass walking in a lonely desert)
Bass: (long sigh) This whole rebels thing was a stupid idea. Now I can't even go in my house! (Looks back at his house, and in the window he sees Larry laughing and the other rebels desperately trying to get him under control, but failing) I wonder if that Cult thing is accepting members?
(Suddenly, the flyer hits his face, causing him to fall on the ground)
Bubble Bass: what's this? 
(The flyer from earlier is shown)
Bubble Bass: Feathered Friends? I've heard of those guys. Hmmmm, maybe I could join them! (Turns the flyer over, sees the words "APPLY TODAY AT THE KRUSTY KRAB" in bold red comic sans) Krusty Krab?! I love that place! Time to run! (Dashes offscreen)
(Fade back to the inside of The Krusty Krab where the game of Chess is still going)
SpongeBob: c'mon, plankton, you've been planning your move for over 5 minutes! We've only got to move 2 pieces!
Plankton: QUIET! THIS TAKES PRECISION!
Patrick: I wonder if our flyer reached anyone.
SpongeBob: we'll just have to be patient.
(The door opens and in steps Bubble Bass)
SpongeBob: hello, sir, welcome to our headquarters!
Bubble Bass: I'm here to join your group!
SpongeBob: I take it you saw our flyer?
Bubble Bass: Yes, it was dated 2018.
SpongeBob: we'll need to perform the new member initiation on ya. (Grabs a jellyfish)
(Patrick looks worried and is shaking)
SpongeBob: what's wrong, Patrick?
Patrick: SpongeBob, don't you know who that is?
SpongeBob: That voice does sound familiar. Almost sounds like- (surprised gasp) BUBBLE BASS?!
Bubble Bass: SPONGEBOB?! 
(The episode fades to black, and a title card reading "INTERMISSION" appears onscreen. Afterwards, we see the 7 deadly in Hell, in front of Satan
Satan: YOU IDIOTS! HOW COULD YOU LOSE AGAIN?!
Wrath: sir, dealing with those stupid cult people is not as easy as it may seem!
Pride: honest, sir!
Satan: YOUR PUNISHMENT FOR FAILING ME YET AGAIN IS, uh… LOCATE HITLER AND BRING HIM BACK TO HELL!
Wrath: but sir, we-
(Satan snaps and everyone goes to the surface in Germany, which is overrun by Nazis. Hitler is giving a big speech)
Wrath: that's great, JUST GREAT! how the Hell will we get Hitler back to Hell?
Pride: I say we go backstage and grab him!
Lust: nah, that'll never work. We need to kill him!
Sloth: i say we do nothing!
Everyone else: shut up, Sloth!
Wrath: Lust's idea isn't so bad, actually. But how will we kill him?
(Wrath stares at Hitler, still giving a long speech. He stares at a Nazi holding a shotgun, and gets an idea)
Wrath: I got it!
Pride: what?
Wrath: what if we were to SNIPE THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HITLER?
Pride: oh, the old "sniper" method. I approve!
Greed: yes, I approve as well! But we aren't gonna spend perfectly good money on a sniper rifle, are we?
Wrath: you never want to pay for anything, Greed! Luckily, we're demons, so we can summon anything out of thin air! (Snaps and a sniper rifle appears in his hands. He laughs as it fades to show him and the other sins perched on a rooftop, aiming the sniper at Hitler)
Wrath: steady… Steady…
Pride: HURRY IT UP!
(Wrath panics and fires the rifle, not hitting Hitler, but the Nazi officer next to him. Hitler runs off the stage in panic)
Wrath: GREAT JOB! NOW WE'VE GOTTA GET HIM WHILE HE'S RUNNING!
(wrath tries shooting Hitler while running but he fails everytime. Eventually he gets frustrated, and runs off. Cut to show Hitler still running, when a huge monster truck, driven by Wrath, runs him over, killing him)
Wrath: and that's how it's done! (Laughs as the screen fades to a titlecard reading "BREAK OVER, NOW RESUMING EPISODE.' The camera fades to a scene of Larry depressed in his basement. All the fish have fled)
Larry: what's the point in going on? (Puts claws to throat) I've never once accomplished anything I've set out to do! I couldn't even beat that stupid Squid cult… Thing!
Dark Voice: oh, but can you?
Larry: (takes claws away from throat) what? Who was that?
(A demon appears in front of Larry)
Larry: are you a demon? Back away! (Points his claw at the demon)
Demon: I couldn't help but overhear you… wanting to take the cult down?
Larry: what of it?
Demon: I saw earlier that you have immense strength! You killed that guy with 3 punches!
Larry: (slowly puts claws down) ...yeah?
Demon: so, if you let me have control over your mind and body, we can take the cult down like (snaps) that!
Larry: it's a deal!
(Larry shakes hands with the demon, and a blue fire surrounds them as the demon absorbs itself into Larry's claw. Larry's body turns a dark purple color as he screams in pain and his eyes turn a deep glowing red. He looks at the screen and lets out a devious laugh)
(Fade back to the Krusty Krab scene)
SpongeBob:  BUBBLE BASS?!
Bubble Bass: SPONGEBOB?! YOU RUN THIS PLACE?! I ALMOST DIDN'T RECOGNIZE YOU IN THAT RIDICULOUS CHICKEN OUTFIT!
SpongeBob: if you're here to cause trouble, get lost!
Bubble Bass: I'm here for the job, I promise!
Plankton: (takes out a machine and flips it on. It beeps) it checks out- my lie detector says he's telling the truth! And this thing is 100% right every time!
Patrick: hey, what about that time it told me Krabby Patties didn't give you diarrhea!
Plankton: (menacing voice) 100%. RIGHT. EVERY. TIME.
Bubble Bass: TMI, dude.
SpongeBob: (makes jellyfish start generating electricity) we need to do the new recruit initiation before you can join! Hold out your tounge!
Bass: uh, why? (Holds tounge out, making SpongeBob grab it and has the Jellyfish sting it. Bubble Bass screams in pain and his tounge swells up to 3 times its size) 
SpongeBob: welcome, bass!
Bubble Bass: I'm allergic to jellyfish stings! I need medicine!
Plankton: got ya covered.(takes out jar of red liquid, and Bass drinks it all) YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO-
(Bubble Bass screams offscreen as flames shoot from offscreen to onscreen)
Bubble Bass: (terribly burnt) that's better.
Plankton: this is great! With 5 members, now we are more likely to win against the forces of Satan!
Bubble Bass: say, I've been meaning to ask, why exactly is Satan after The Cult?
Plankton: (long sigh) it's an incredibly long story.
Krabs: you got some time to kill?
Bubble Bass: yeah?
SpongeBob: alright, so-
(The screen fades to later that day where SpongeBob had explained everything)
Bubble Bass: wow. That's dark.
Patrick: it's even darker when you've experienced it yourself.
(The phone rings. SpongeBob picks it up and puts it on speaker)
Squidward: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Squidward? What's wrong?
Squidward: some lunatic just broke into the cult and is destroying us! We need help!
SpongeBob: don't you have demon weapons?
Squidward: those are only for demons, they have no effects on mortals! Hurry up, we're losing men! (Loud crash is heard and then a dialtone)
Plankton: crazed lunatic? We've met many crazed lunatics! Who could it be this time?
SpongeBob: i don't know, but we better get there quick! 
(They all run offscreen, except Bubble Bass, who just slowly walks)
(Fade to then entering the cult. They see the possessed Larry, and he is destroying everything and killing cult members left to right)
SpongeBob: who the heck is that?
Squidward: i don't know, just help us fix this!
(Bass watches Larry kill many cult members in a row and realises who he is)
Bass: Larry!!!!!! 
(Larry, who is in the middle of beating a cultist up, turns to face Bass, instantly recognizing him)
Larry: (deep voice) BUBBLE BASS!!!!
(Larry dashes over to Bubble Bass, and Bass jumps out of the way making Larry smash his head against the door. He stands up, twice as angry as he was before)
Bass: we can talk about this, Larry!
Larry: MUST! KILL! REBELS! MUST! KILL! CULT!
SpongeBob: rebels?! Who the barnacles are the rebels?!
(Larry delivers a huge blow to Spongebob, who absorbs it without a scratch)
SpongeBob: ha! I'm immune to that weak shit!
Larry: WHAT?! (keeps punching spongebob, who keeps absorbing it)
SpongeBob: now watch this!
(Suddenly, SpongeBob unleashes all the force Larry used on him onto Larry, who flies backwards and crashes through the wall)
Patrick: i didn't know you could do that!
SpongeBob: I've known I could do this for over a decade! I've just rarely been able to use it!
(They all walk outside. Larry is completely knocked out. He suddenly wakes up and screams loudly)
Bass: Larry! 
Larry: (starts punching head) OUT! DEMON, OUT!
Bass: Demon?
(Larry punches his head so hard a great amount blood escapes through his nose as a purple light flies out)
Everyone except Larry: WHAT?!
Demon: ow!!! The deal's off! (Summons a ring of fire around him as he descends into Hell)
Bass: Larry, what happened?
(Larry is out cold)
Bass: quick, get Larry to shelter!
(They pick Larry up and carry him in)
(Fade to Larry laying on the Lodge floor. He wakes up screaming)
Larry: DEMONS! DEMONS! DEMONS!
Bass: calm down, Larry! The demons are gone!
Larry: DEMONS! POSSESSING! DEALS! DEMONS!
Bass: Larry! What has gotten into you!
Larry: DEMONS! DEMONS! DEMONS! DEMONS! (laughs maniacally as his mouth foams)
Squidward: this man is clearly unstable! Bring 'im to the cage!
Crayons: but sir, he could be a danger to the other prisoners!
Squidward: well do we have any sort of special cage?
Crayons: we do have that oversized clam cage. With a few adjustments i could make it inescapable!
Squidward: then do that. And hurry, it's hard to hold this guy down!
Larry: I SEE DEMONS! DEMONS! DEMONS! (laughs hard and cuts off one of Squidward's hands, so he screams in pain)
(Larry is suddenly hit with a laser beam which Crayons uses to lift him into the cage. Larry grabs the sides which electrocutes him)
Squidward: that was fast.
Crayons: Turns out, i already made an electrical cage.
(Larry laughs as he continues to get electrocuted by the side of the cage)
Bass: so… Am i in the Feathered Freeks?
SpongeBob: it's feathered friends. And, yes.
Bass: alright! 
SpongeBob: now let's go back to our base. It's been a long day.
(They start walking offscreen)
Plankton: so, can we finish our chess game?
SpongeBob: sure, but don't take forever!
(The camera zooms into Larry laughing like a maniac as the screen fades to black and the episode ends)
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