Lazlo VS Bessie

Lazlo vs Bessie Higgenbottom is the sixth What-If? Death Battle of KickTheBuddy7029's third season, featuring Lazlo from Camp Lazlo and Bessie Higgenbottom from The Mighty B! in a battle between naive, hyperactive scouts.
== Description ==
Camp Lazlo vs The Mighty B! Heroic and immature scouts from forgotten shows on rivaling networks will clash to see what summer camp has taught them.
== Intro ==
Potty: Ahh, summer camp. It's where parents send their children to get some peace and quiet around the house. And it's the perfect place, since there's moldy food, dangerous activities, uncomfortable cabins and cold shower water.
Patchy: But that doesn't stop a few children from loving it, especially if they're optimistic and...not so smart.
Potty: Like Lazlo, the Bean Scout of Camp Kidney who tries to make camp fun for everybody in the most chaotic ways imaginable...
Patchy: ...and Bessie Higgenbottom, the Honeybee Scout of San Francisco who wants to earn every single badge, no matter what it takes.
Potty: He's Patchy the Pirate, and I'm Potty the Parrot.
Patchy: And it's our job to analyze weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win...a Death Battle.
== Attention, DEATH BATTLE! It's Time for Camp Lazlo! ==
Potty: What do you get when you send SpongeBob SquarePants to the surface and have him attend a summer camp instead of boating school? You end up with Lazlo, of course. You may think his backstory is non-existent, but it's deeper than that, actually.
Patchy: It's not anything too deep. Prickly Pines is a small, quiet town somewhere in the United States. It's home to a tight-knit community, but it's also home to the shittiest summer camp: Camp Kidney, run by Scoutmaster Lumpus.
Potty: Camp Kidney houses all of the stereotypical summer camp shenanigans. Ya know, like mosquitoes sucking all your blood at 11pm, people fighting for the last marshmallow, and a scoutmaster that only took the job to make kids miserable.
Patchy: One day, the cautious and organized elephant Raj, immigrated from India and was sent here so his parents could toughen him up. At the same time, there was also a quiet rhinoceros named Clam.
Potty: Wait, who the hell would name their rhino Clam? Were they expecting seafood during labor?
Patchy: Upon arrival, both were bullied by the local camp jerk, Edward Platypus, until Lazlo arrived in a banana truck! What followed was Edward's bitterness towards Lazlo for hogging all the attention, and Lumpus growing dissatisfied with Lazlo, Raj and Clam's shenanigans. And it was at that point when Lazlo heard a bear crying for help.
Potty: Lazlo went to go investigate, and at first, the bear roared at him...until it was revealed that the bear only had two pine cones stuck in their nose. So it's safe to assume Lazlo must be related to Chuck Norris for having balls of titanium.
Patchy: Lazlo brought the bear to camp, only to strike fear in everybody, so after Lazlo tried to politely ask the bear to leave, well, it definitely wasn't nice. The bear was angry at him, and everybody assumed Lazlo was eaten due to Edward exaggerating the details to make himself look cool! At least until Raj and Clam traveled to find his last known whereabouts.
Potty: They found him working as a waiter at a steakhouse. I sure hope he loved the crappy world of minimum wage, because after explaining the incident to Raj and Clam, Lazlo decided he didn't want to leave...until Raj accidentally convinced him to return.
Raj: You know Lazlo, when we first met you, Clam and I didn't know anything about camping. But you showed us what camping is--that it's having fun, and adventure, and nature. But we did not escape from camp dressed as totem poles, risked getting eaten by nature, ride a roller coaster with a weasel, and drink water WITHOUT ice because we wanted to be good campers! ...we did it to find you, because friends stick together.
Patchy: Guess what happened the next day? The same grizzly bear from before entered camp grounds, with pine cones stuck in his nose again! When Edward thought he was going to get mauled, Lazlo entered in and helped out the bear again. It was at that point when he truly reunited with Raj and Clam, and they've been an inseparable trio since then.
Potty: Also since then, Lazlo has accomplished some pretty amazing feats. All within the span of a summer, no less. Well...sort of.
----Feats
* Caught a fish, which is something nobody in Camp Kidney had ever accomplished before
* Tricked the Squirrel Scouts into thinking he, Raj and Clam were aliens
* Witnessed a meteor shower that only occurs once every 50,000 years
* Taught Raj how to swim
* Helped Camp Kidney pass the annual camp inspection
* Found hidden treasure
* Convinced Scoutmaster Lumpus to fall in love with a tree (seriously)
* Made a club out of absolutely nothing, which became more popular than Edward's club
* Survived a fall from a waterfall that nobody has ever lived to tell the tale for
* Stopped Edward from pantsing everyone in camp
* He and Raj disguised themselves as Lumpus' parents to cheer him up (although this heavily backfired)
* Assisted Lumpus in earning his Handy Helper badge
* Snapped Clam out of the Love Sick virus
* Broke the world record for stacking beans
* Saved Edward from a violent beating by Ms. Mucus
* Saved Camp Kidney from closing
* Directed a play for the camp
* Defeated Ms. Mucus and retrieved all of Camp Kidney's confiscated toys
* Has talked angry mobs out of their harmful deeds
* Tamed a grizzly bear in two separate episodes
* Came up with a plan to freeze a caveman that was attacking Samson
* Managed to get Camp Kidney put on a map
* Stopped a volcano from erupting
* Helped Nurse Leslie get his job back
* Tricked Lumpus into thinking he hated Camp Kidney
* Outsmarted a group of clowns, despite being afraid of them
* Briefly "fixed" Samson's bad luck by confronting the Scoutmaster in the Sky
* Literally saved Christmas
----Patchy: Since summer camp has totally natural activities like swatting mosquitoes, it's safe to say Lazlo has the strength to get through it all. Starting off, he is comparable to Clam, who once burped with enough force to push the moon out of orbit at a rapid pace.
Potty: The Earth's moon is 1737.5 kilometers across. The moon moved roughly 9 times its width, which would be 15637.5 kilometers. More specifically, it moved in three seconds.
Patchy: This would mean the moon moved at 5212500 m/s. The moon's mass is 7.35e22 kilograms, so in other words, Clam burped at a force of 238.64 Yottatons of TNT, which is Large Planet level!
Potty: He regularly harms Scoutmaster Lumpus, who was stated and clearly shown to have overpowered Heffer Wolfe from Joe Murray's other cartoon, Rocko's Modern Life.
Patchy: As we've said before, Heffer was powerful enough to have caused the sun to get blown out like a candle and cause an explosion that was visible from the outside of the galaxy, which he caused and tanked up-close! This is worth 92.6 PetaFoe, or Multi-Solar System level.
== Bessie's Got the Bee-at in DEATH BATTLE! ==
== Intermission ==
== Pre-Fight ==
== Fight! ==
== Results ==
== Next Time ==
== Trivia ==
* The connections between Lazlo and Bessie are that they are naive, hyperactive scouts from semi-obscure cartoons on rivaling networks (Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon) who have blonde rivals (Edward and Portia) that are the polar opposite of them (Edward and Portia are arrogant and egotistical in contrast to Lazlo and Bessie's eternally optimistic personalities). Both are annoying to everybody around them, have a loyal trio of friends (Raj and Clam; Penny and Happy), and are highly devoted to their status as scouts.
* The track title would be Scouts for Mighty Disaster.
* The battle would be animated in hand-drawn animation. How many hand-drawn fights am I going to have?