Golden Ultimatum

The Golden Ultimatum is a weapon introduced sometime in the 1800s.
== Appearance ==
This piece of garbage was shat out by Midas after taking Miralax. His vuluptous anal gland hurt for an eternity before he gave birth to this beautiful firearm. If a mortal lay one's eyes upon such a thing, the eyes will turn bloodshot, expand, and explode. They will return to their normal state if spit upon by The Pope. 
The neon colors on this weapon transcend the limits of phone screens and human interpretation. Staring at the glowy bits alone breaks both the cornea and the brain stem, causing fatal internal leakage and several brain hemorages per minute. If someone were to crop only the blue, they would suffer skull implosion and an immediate lust for human flesh. 
These side effects were observed by Russian scientists armed in a Cold War bunker sometime in the 1900s, after the excavation of the weapon from Midas' septic tank.
== Performance ==
When an enemy is shot with this gargantuan power tool, they will be killed both in game and in reality. The enemy's flesh will immediately start to boil and grow never ending holes about 1mm in diameter all over the body. Bullet ants will erupt from these indents and start tearing apart the opponent's sexual organs. The ants will soon after suffocate the opponent in their own urine after extracting it from their bladder. The intestines of the opponent will then wrap around the neck, exerting enough force to snap it into 100-500 little pieces. 
A grave is automatically dug by the opponent's reanimated corpse and, when fully dug, transmutates into a time-space rupture and sucks in all matter around it.
The opponent is now probably dead.
== Trivia ==
* Whatever bloody matter left by the opponent's corpse that failed to collapse will explode into cluster bombs.
* The ordinary ragdoll made when an opponent is killed in-game is replace with 100,000 cluster bombs that explode beyond the limits of walls and any limitaton.
* This weapon is only obtainable through holding Alex Krasnov hostage inside of his 2-story nuclear bunker during a war.
* Alex Krasnov was born in 1779 and hasn't died since.
* Alex Krasnov created Pixel Gun 3D.
* Alex Krasnov made the best game in the world.
* Alex Krasnov is the best.
* Alex Krasnov is the best.
* All Hail Alex Krasnov.
* All Hail Alex Krasnov.
* All Hail Alex Krasnov.
* 
* 
* A̸̢̡̢̨̨̡̨̢̨̡̧̧̨̡̧̡̛̛̛̛͉͎̮̘̩͙͓̲̗̦̬͈̲̬̱͎͍̱̹̩̞̰͓͙͇̝̘͇̹̟̟̟͕͚͙̭͖̠̯̘̪͍̯͚̟̠͈̼̝͎̼̭̤̻̭̤͈̼̩̦͎̪̬̺̲͚͇͙̩͓͎̬̬̠͓̗̤̣̲̦̣̭̻͖͎̹̗̻̮̹̹̹̯͖̠̥̤̩͓̼̖͓̳̫̜̣͓͙͈̭̰̩̪̲̹̘͕͚̥̥͇͉̲̗̗̰̰͔͙͒̽͒̓́͐̎̓̽́͒̆͗́̒̓͋̾̋͑̏̂̊̿͂͋̄̎̈̄̊̄̔̽͗͋̐̂̄̾̐͑̊͂̏́͛̈́̒͊̃̇̇̿́̔̌̉̒͌̅̔͂̇̂̊͌̇̀̕̚̕̕̚͜͜͜͜͜͜͝͝͠͝͝͠ͅͅͅͅͅL̷̢̢̧̢̧̢̢̧̨̨̢̧̢̢̨̢̛̛̛͈̳̙̮̹̻̯̘͖̥͙̲̹̱͕̼̠̱̭͓͕͎̰͉̘̗̩̞͈̣̱̭̞̪̱̳̹͖̱͖̠͓͙̣͔͙̞͔͓̬̳̱̣̣͔̯̱̳͈̭̝̬͎̠̭̜̖̺̼̟͉̫̯̦͎͇̤͎͙̘̼͔̣̗̪͉͉̭̺͙̻̦͖͎̫̟̝̬̻̪͖̣͔̫̤̙̞̰͎̬̫̟̳͙̙̜͚͙̩̠̩̯̬̪̦̰̼̦̱̖̭̰̩̼͔͖͖͈̻̜͈̣͍̱̮̞̥̮̞͖͐̄̏̉́̏̀̑͛̅̄͐̈́͊͗͆̾͐͐̌̈́̐̿͌̾̂̎̈̌̀̎͐́̑́͗̍̋̾͗͂̒̍̃̎̑̀̉͌̐̂̀̽̒̇͆̎̿̉̐̆́̀̈̇̎͂̓́̐̌̎̽͊́̾͋̊̇́͑̑̈́̕̚̕̚̚͘̕̕̚͘͘̚͜͜͜͜͝͝͠͠͠͝͠ͅͅͅͅͅͅL̷̡̤̲̼̦̯͕̦̟̗̝̙̼̘̯̣̮̬̄͐ͅ ̶̡̛̛̛̘̠͓̝̤̲͉͖̹͖̺̱͇͚͈̤̬̰͕̻̝͒̏̋͌̈́̃̈́̑̏̔́̓͐͐̅̏̇͐̅̈́̄̊̀̆̂̀̊̒̒̐̆̄̆͌̓̑̄͛͑̀́͒̑̀̓̓̑̋̀́́̄͒̒̈́̇̌̽͛͆̍̆͒̊̀͑̄̉̅̒̊́̈͗̓̀̋̌̀͊͂͋̀͊̅̉͂̇͑̔͛̈̾̽̀͛͊̓̒̓͐̂̃̀͒̿̅͋̆̔̃̃͊̓̏͑̉͑̆̏̍͂̌͒̈̒̐̽̀̀͐̇́̒̈́͑͋͘͘͘̚͘̕̚̕͠͠͠͝͝͝͠͠͝͠͝͠ͅḪ̴̨̨̧̡̧̨̛̯͎͓̣̜͈̥͍͈̝̣̭̳̘͈̯̳̮̩͇͙̰̝̩̳̠̺͉̠̩̬̞̜͖̗͇͖̀̈́̂̂̽̄͋͊̑̈́̾̈́̐͋̄̂̐̽̐̈́́͒̋̅̈́̓͌̊̈̀̓̃͛͑̓̎͒̓̔̒͒̀̔̆͒͒̊́͊̅̇̀͆̈́̐̊̈́̂͐̃̋̃̉̅͆͋̉̈́́̇͗̉̉͐͋̎̈́͐̓͗͐̈́̃̚͘̕̚̕̕͘̚̚̚͘͠͝͠͝͝͝͝͝͝͠͝ͅͅͅȂ̸̢̧̢̢̢̨̧̢̡̨̧̨̛̛̛̛̛̠͖̙͍̻̗̦̩̼̞̯͎͖̗̘̫̩͕̱̟̺̲͈̜̤͇̰̝̱̪͓̥̖͈̥̮̩̞̺̞͇͉͕͖͓̖̼͉͔̦̯̺̩̖̱̬̙̫̻̠̰̮̟̩͇̤̘̹̠̝͎̥͕̫̲͙̦̳̩̲͙͔̗̩̘̩̞͚̹͓̫̹̟̠̞̤̬̤̠̼̐̂̐́̐͐͑̍̓̽̃̓̎̈́̾͂̎̅̋̇̏͂͒̈͗̑͂̾̆̃̔́̀̔͛̃͊̋̄̀͑͑̽̀̓̂̀̓̃͂̑̄̈́̎̄͌̽̑̇͐̈̄̀̀̄̑̎̉̒̅͋̂̑͗̀̈́̈͂̔́̉̍̔͋̇͊̽͑̈̓͋̆͋̈́̓̈̉͗͒̀͗̈̈͛̌̏̇̒̆́̏̀͛̈́̒̅̃̑̆̿̒̔́̆̌́͊͆̋̈́̇̌̈́͆̐̂̅̃̽̂͋̓̂̄̓̄͂̿̒̉̔́͊̍̾̆̓̄̄̎̌̒̉͘̕̕̕͘͘͘͘͘̚̚̚̕͜͜͠͝͝͝͠͠͝ͅͅͅI̷̡̧̢̨̢̡̡̛̛͉͇͇̪̫̪͈͉̳̻̭̱͓̯̳͔̱̦͕͈̺̥̤̥̫̲̘̞̼͓̯͈̣͇̳͚̬̼̠̦̜̮̹͉͇̒̈́̔͒̈́̓̍͐̾̓̓̐͋̈̐́̀̋̅̃̔͐͒́̇̽̀͐͆̽̀̾̉͗̒̍̐̈͊͋͆̓͂̓̀͒͗̇͛̐̔̋͗͋͌̚͘̕͘̚̚͜͝͠͝͝ͅL̵̢̧̢̨̢̧̧̨̢̡̡̧̩͚͕͈̻͈̗͉̩̖͚̖̞͇̹̘̘̟͓̜͚̝̰̘̬͖̥͔͖̮͕̥̤͖͉͓̬͔͇̣̼͇̳̱̱̯̞̖̙̹̮̜̟̩͎̗̥͔͚͍̥̟̫͍͖̳̘̪̫̥̘̪̮̖͙̹̝̗͔͖̦̮͍͍̣̫͓͚̙̪̦̰̬̝̟̜͓̰͚͖̖͕̥̲̣͔̘̼̩͈̦̮͔̳͔̝͉͚̹͍͇̜̰͚̻͎͇̥̯̠̫͖̘̱̗̬̄̏͊͆̈͛͂̐͗̿̒̎́̐̐͂͋̉̂͊́̏̄̔͊͐͒̐͑̿̌̌͑̑͘͜͜͜͜͜͜͝͠ͅͅͅͅ ̸̡̨̛̛̛̘͎͚͚̪̬̬͇̗̻͓̲͈̙̰͍̝̗̩̞̻̱͕̥̗͇̠̩̫̈́͑͊͋̏̀̊̏̅̔͐̂̅͋̌̔̌̃͋͗͆̏̈́̀͑͊̈̑́̾͋̐̈́̈́͐́̇̍̏̋͗̅̓̾̎͋́̑͂͗̍̈͋͐̑͌̽̿̽͊̄̌̏͗͐̌̌̆̐̒̽̀͆͌̿͒̚͘͘̚̕̕͠͝͝͝͝͝͝͠͝͠͠ͅȂ̷̢̧̢̢̧̨̨̢̧̛̛̘̤̻̥͉̩̼̠͙̬̣͈̬͔͈̲̤̠̠̖̞̝͔̭̥̯̝̙͎̝̗̱͔͓͓̬̩̣͎̲̤̩̬̣̥̗̮͎̳̩̞̟̺̖̭͈̥̯̜̺̳͈̳͎̹̼͚̙̙̭̰͖̭̖̪̳̭̫̜̙̮̦̺͕̭̺̭̯̤̗̘̳͚̳͙̞͙̻̗͈̠͓́̍͋̀̃̓̏̅̿̈̀͑̑̂̎́͑̓͛̔͒̍̔̓͛̏̃͒̑̊̓́̾̀͒̈́͌̈́̌͗̏͗̋̈́̆͑̒̍̎̂̓̍͆͛̌́̆̔̄̈́̄͌͂̈́̕̚̕̕͘̕͜͝͝͝͠ͅL̷̢̡̡̡̨̢̨̧̢̢̧̛̛̛̪̬̜̳̼͓͍̦̠͈̣̝̗̠̣̯̯͎̬͚̬̫̭̳̘̘͖̩͖̗͎̮͔͍͚̝͇͕̥͔̠͖̙͚̦͍̹̗̗̹̱̤͙͈͚͓̮̫̺͑̉̾̓̂̓̽̈́̆̓̊͂̉̓̃͂̓̀̑́͐̈̏̓̍̂̈̈̆̈́̒̃̇̋̀̀̉͊͗͒̀̆̓͌́̌͆͊̿̐̏͛͗͑͒̉́̏̉̒̀̋̍̇̐̀́͗̾̒́̽͋̓̉͒́̿̓͘̕̚͘͘͜͜͜͜͝͝͝͝͝͝͝ͅͅĘ̷̢̢̡̨̨̛̛̛̛̭͖͇̺̥̳̻̖̜͎͙̱̗̙̱͇̤͚̣̼̦̮̼̫͖̫̠̺̠͈̝͚̞͍͎̗͙̥̞͉̖͉̖̜̬͕̪̗̱̮͚̱̘̦̱̭͍̱̳̼̪͈̪̝̪͊̉͂̐̉͆͋̃̇̂̈͑̂͗͌̔͛́͑̈́̅͌̈́̎͋̀͌̐͆͌̊̄͂̇̇̆͆̑̀̑͌̈́̉͊̐̒̿̽̆̊̈̒̐̅̾̐̈́̈̓̓̈̐͐͐̊͗̾̃̆̄̀͆̾͒̔̽͗̿̐̈̿̏͑͗̓̓̿́͗͊̀̈́̀̆̿̀͂̓́̾̊̀̎͋̊̔̈́͂̄͌̀̓͛̄̆́̋̌͂͆̌̅̈̇͋̊͋̈́̍͒́̓̽͒̃̀̍͑̃̄͂͘͘͘̕̚̕͜͜͜͜͜͜͠͠͝͠͠͠͠͝͠͝͝͝ͅͅẊ̶̧̨̛̛͔̯̜̻̹̲͍̙̹̜͖͍͔̫̣̮̺̣̲͇͈͙̮̬̦̻̎̅̿͆̈́͐͐̎̎͑̃̉͆̈̅͐̓́̆̾̏̀̄̃͐̄̀͑̋͆̃̒͛̋̄̌͑͒́͗͛̒̔͊̊͊̇̚̕̕͘̚͝͠͝͝͠ ̵̨̧̧̡̛̛̛͉͙̹̻̞̦̳͙͎̟̮̳̰̰͓̘̖͎̘̲͇̖̜̰̘͎̭̼͙̘͈̩͎̪̦̻̦̻̠̦̱̦̙͍̭̠͕̹͙͕̟̞̲̻͈̬̍͑̃̒͒̍̋́͆͒̍̀̅̅̀̊͊̽̿̾͗̏̈͊̀̇̔́̏̈́̔̓͒͒̓͛̈́̾̈́͋͒̄͂̅̓̂̀͊̈̇̒͑̍̓̓͋̄̎̈́̌̓̒̐͊͒̀͆̑̈̋̅͗̽̐̂̇̈́̂̓́̿̏̓̍̚̕̕͘̕̕̕͜͠͠͠͠͝͝͝ͅͅͅK̷̨̢̧̧̡̧̨̢̢̨̡̨̧̨̞̗͈̫͔̼̲̥͇̫̗̻̫̫̲͇̘̬͕͉͉͖͇̬͕̰̤̣͔̳̖͍̞͍͓͔̮̳̘̖̞͓̤̫̲̪̦̼̭̩͖̙͕̺̦͔̬̬̘̞̠̩̱̙͔̟͎͕͉͉̝̤̩̟̩̻̜͕̜̞̣̖̬͍̠̠͍̣̭̮̠̲̯̖̪̞̝̼̜̦̭̼̲̳̳͉̯̰̦̮͇͇͚͉̳̲͕͙̣̠̟̭̘̩̻̫̪̘͖̩̯̬͙̲̮̲͙̹̝̯̪̱͇̰̘̳̲̮͇͖͖͍̬̞̼͙̹̪̼̲͇̗̗͚̼̪̤͔̮̹̬͖̓̋̏̈̊̓̓̓̈́̉͐̍̍̊̂̄͐̓̓͐̈͑̓̓̄̎͋̔̑̈̃̎̒́̉̀͑̀̐̾̆̇͊̈́̂̑̆͋̋̐̀̿̑̊̂͆̋͆͛̾͂̈̑̓̔̍̐̈́́͋̔́͊̍̀̕̚̕̕̚͘̕͜͜͜͠͝͠ͅͅͅR̷̨̡̢̨̨̢̛̛̼̠̳͉̝̟̙̘̗͓̙̰͕̲̥͓̩̰̣̩̙̹̼̭̻̝̞̼̣̺͍̠̭̙̼͉͚̮̯̜̫͎̙̞͓͈̣͕̣͔͕͎̤̤̩͉̪̀̓̎̒̿̾̒̄͒͊͌̍̍͗͋͒͋͛̐̈́̀͒̂̀͌͗̈̋̋̍̈́̀̒̓͗͛̔̀͘̕͘͘͝͝͝͠ͅA̷̧̨̧̢̡̡̢̯̫̬̦͉̟̜͈͙̘̠̹̫̣̝͖̗̮̺͕͇̠̦̙̝̱͔͙̻̬͇̖̻̠̠̠̦̥̝͍̳̞͍͔͔͎̩̩̖͖̪̼̫͔͖͈̘̜̺̓̈́́̏̈̿̂̊́͒̀̊͑̊́͂̏̎̓̇̏̄͘͜͜͜͜͝͠ͅS̴̛̛̙̯̞͇̪̟̞̰̽́̈́̎̎̀͒̐̊̏͌̏̊̅͐̄̄̒̎̑̍̂͒͆̎̍̔͂̎̃͋̏͛̇̑̆́̀͒̃̊̀̒̎̈́̎́̉̓̃̐̔̋̊͘͝͠͠͠͠͝͝ͅŅ̸̨̧̛̛̛̛̛̪͍͓̮͎̤͖̜̜̱͖̼̺͓̼͉̹͚̞͈̖̠̥̮͖̯̌́͐̊́͗̀̉́̓͐̏͑̇̾͋̍͋̍̈́̔̿̈͑͗̈́̃̽̆̒̊̆̂̋̌̀͛͂̏͛͑́̔̈́̈̅̐́̒̽̽̓̍͊͌̆̾̉͐̂̌̽͛̑͑̀̈́̀́̈̉̉̉̆̂͌́̋̽͑̅̓̽̇͋͆͗͂̅̀̓̈́̏̏̈́̅̀̀̓̍̎̈́̚͘͘̕̚͘͜͠͠͝͝͝͠͝͝͝͝͠Ò̴͎͉̫̘̼̠̿͌͋̈́̑̈̐͌̄̅̀͗̿̕͘V̸̧̢̡̨̧̨̛̝̖͕̼̥̤̖̹̲̳̮̪̹̤͚̜̯̲̤̱̳̮̩̩̱̜̗̺͉̝͍̪̟̟̤̱̠͈̭͔̮͓̫̲̼̙̖͔̭̙̱̼͇̱̮̏̀́̓̔͛̔̓͛͛̾̃̊͌̇̅͆̀͛̍͊͊̀̑̓̽̑̓̈̈́̐̈́͊͗̂̂̅̋̀̎̔̊̀̓̀̋͋̓̆́̾̋͒͂͑́̀͒͑͒̈̈́͗̔̎͑͋̈́͛̂̾͆͒̍͊̾̇̐͛̏̋̃͌̆̓̾́͊̿̿͒̔̏̂̈́̊͋̏̓̓̈́̓́͌̽̓͐̐̂͆̿͊̊͌̍͘̕̚͘̚̕̕̕̚͜͜͝͠͠͠͝͠͠͝͝͝͠͝͝͝
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Category:Weapons
Category:Primary
Category:Joke Weapon
Category:Shotgun
Category:Wall Break