The Star of the Backstage/Transcript

This is the transcript for The Star of the Backstage
== Transcript ==
[At a memorial for Franklin Chase.]
Homer: Mmm. When I die, we should totally get this sandwich place for my memorial. So good. Mmm. Can't wait
Marge: Oh, all these people loved Mr. Chase. His students are taking it so hard
Homer: Yeah, nobody grieves like theater kids
[Marge sees a VHS showing a musical, Y2K: The Millennium Bug, where she participated along with other Springfielders.]
Marge: This is my show!
Lisa: Why are they singing about computers?
Marge: It was a musical about Y2K, which was very scary back then
Homer: Scarier than anything we have now
Marge: (to Lisa) The whole show takes place on New Year's Eve, 1999...
All: (singing; on TV) Five, four, three
[The Simpsons are watching Y2K.]
All: (singing) Two, zero, zero, zero. A midnight countdown to Y2K. Five, four, three, two, will I be a zero?
-(singing) When tomorrow becomes today
[Lisa pauses the TV.]
Lisa: Mom, which one are you?
Marge: I was right over here. In the wings, calling all the shots...as the stage manager. Mrs. Chase, I'm so sorry for your loss
Mrs. Chase: Oh, thank you, dear. Say, look what I found when I was cleaning out Franklin's office
[Mrs. Chase gives Marge her High School prompt book, prompting more memories and the production of a musical, with her as stage manager.]
Marge: My prompt book. This binder lists all the cues for the entire production
Mrs. Chase: Oh, Franklin always said you were the heart of the show--that your stage managing was so...zealous
Marge: I definitely ran a tight ship. But in a fun way everyone loved, obviously
Homer: Oh, yeah, totally
Bart: Super fun
Marge: Of course, I would have loved to have been in the show, except I'm not much of a singer. But in my imagination, I've got the voice of a Disney Princess. Oh...What a special time. I'd give anything to feel that magic again. (Disney princess voice; singing) Script notes and sound cues. Take me there again. In my blacks in the backs of the wings. So I'm not seen. No one knows the magic. That hides behind the scenes
[At the Simpsons home.]
Marge: (regular voice) It's me! The cast said yes! We're putting on a musical! (Disney princess voice; singing) Places, everybody. It's time to start the show. That's what actors need me to say. Otherwise, they wouldn't know where to go. Cinch up the hemlines. Sound check all the mics. Close the door, ring the bell. And bring down the house lights. It's curtains up for Marge Bouvier. 'Cause I'm once again the star. Of the backstage
[In Springfield.]
Clancy: Wow, you're the director?
Marge: (regular voice) No, more important--the stage manager
-Ah!
Marge: Five minutes, guys!
Julius: Thank you, five
Marge: Five minutes. I always used to love saying that, before...(Disney princess voice; singing) The endless loads of laundry. The dishes piled high. The whining and complaining
Bart: (singing) It's mine
Lisa: (singing) It's mine
Bart & Lisa: (singing) It's mine
Marge: (regular voice) Enough! (Disney princess voice; singing) I'm returning to my theater family. A revival of our fondest memories. Singin...
Kirk: (singing) Do
Julius: (singing) Re
Helen: (singing) Mi
Smithers: (singing) This
Lenny: (singing) Show
Barney: Will be
Marge: (Disney princess voice; singing) The talk of the town. A hit, a smash, the rage
Homer: (singing) And there's nothing Springfield needs more. Than a play
Marge: (regular voice) Good! (Disney princess voice; singing) 'Cause I'm once again the. Appreciated, well-respected, never, ever disconnected. Nothing but the most impressive. Everybody's dearest friended. Star. Of the backstage...
All: (singing) She's the star, see how she shines. She answers when we call for lines
Marge: (Disney princess voice; singing) Places, everybody!
[After the song.]
Homer: Wow, honey, those dorks are so excited to be in your show again. And I will do everything I can to support you...while I'm at Moe's. Mwah
[Lenny however breaks his hip.]
Lenny: Sorry, Marge, but I got to drop out of the show. I broke my hip while singing and dancing about feeling young again
[Bart and Lisa even drag Homer into it as Lenny needs a replacement.]
Bart: Say, Dad, what if you filled in for Lenny and joined Mom's musical?
Lisa: Yeah, then you'd be the most supportive husband ever
Homer: Great idea, kids. (to Marge) I'm all in, babe! One pair of super tight dance pants, please!
[Bart and Lisa start laughing.]
Homer: From this day forward, we are enemies. Forever and ever. Forever
[In the auditorium.]
Marge: Okay, back on stage--it's just like we're teenagers again. Now let's start the rehearsal
Kirk: Theater!
Helen: Wait, we can't start without Sasha Reed. She was the star of the show
Julius: Mmm-hmm
Helen: She got into Julliard
Smithers: Sasha. You never forget your first diva. I'd love to know what she's been up to
Marge: Well, as your dutiful stage manager, I did reach out repeatedly, but never heard back. I guess we'll never know what happened after Sasha left little old Springfield for New York City
Woman: Never say never! Hello, old friends!
Smithers: Ah! It's Sasha!
Sasha: Let me tell you all about it. (singing) It was a cold and rainy morning. When I exited the bus. I stepped into the city. Everyone in such a rush. I supposed I started singing. Just to keep the chill at bay. I guess I sounded something like. This. And that's when I heard a man say. "That tone, that pitch. "Your voice'll make us rich. Stick with me, and you'll be destined to impress". And that's how Sasha became. A massive success. Yes, Sasha. Is a massive success. Now I dine on the veranda. With Lin-Manuel Miranda. Scrape meat off the bone with Patti LuPone. Don't mention Glenn Close. I eat Bananas Foster. With my good friend Sutton Foster. Thanks to Stephen Sondheim, who's the most gracious host. Yes, I'm everything you thought I'd be. When I left Springfield for the big city. I've made it, I'm a cut above the rest. 'Cause Sasha has returned. A massive. Success...That's right. I'm a broadway. Star!
Helen: Oh, I can't believe Sasha came back
Kirk: What a career!
Homer: I know a famous person that knows what's his name, who is she, and never heard of him!
[But when Marge's old high school nemesis comes to town, she realizes that her high school memories aren’t what she thought they were.]
Marge: Okay, okay, everybody. It's so exciting that Sasha is a massive success, but we really need to walk through our blocking. Let's make it precise, gang!
Sasha: Blocking, so important. That's what Hal always told me. Hal Prince
Homer: Boom! Named it!
Sasha: But before we get into the technical stuff, we need to reconnect as an ensemble. Let's all go to my lake house and do trust falls
Marge: But we have to carve out some time to run lines
Sasha: (chuckles) Marge Bouvier, you have not changed a bit. Okay, Mom, we'll run lines, but don't wait up for us
Marge: Us? What do you mean?
Sasha: This bonding session is for the cast. You understand, right?
Marge: Oh. Sure. Of course
Sasha: Come on, friends!
Homer: (to Marge) I was wrong. Theater kids are super cool. Thanks for the hookup, honey
[On stage.]
All: (singing)
[She finds out that the cast have had several parties at Marge's house without her knowing of it. But now, Homer is in it too. She quickly finds out the truth and tells the cast. They think she is mean.
Category:Transcripts