Ach

Ach takes the marital status description of "wife (male)" because he is a femboy, an EXTRA THICC one at that. He is Rio2's damsel in distress as to Rio, his knight in shining armor. He is married to Rio and always gets kidnapped by Ser, the ice-breathing dragon turtle queen who wants to marry him for his juicy Ach and luscious hips, which happens to be the same reason why Rio married him! But at least Rio cares a lot about him!
As a stay-at-home husband with Rio, he wears some programming socks and coding gloves and, to match that style, he is a part-time programmer for shames on Windows Internet Explorer making a few extended microshames and earning about Un$97 for everyday he works, which he has saved up for years just in case Rio Sisters Plumbing Inc. goes out of business. He goes full-time when kidnapped by Ser. When not doing his job, he is busy being in the kitchen making good food from some recipe book. He cooks for Rio, her friends and family, and Ser because he's submissive and prone to the mildest emotional manipulation.
He may seem weak, but he is actually just an idiot. He has the power of a common version Idiot Manipulation used by females, while also being at risk to typical Idiot Manipulation. He can also control his permanent emotional instability, only going insane when he feels like it, usually when Ser is being extra annoying to him.
Ach is the ancestor of Peach due to Perui stealing his DNA and then creating Princess Peach 350-something years later. This happened with his friends as well, but with other individual spirits bent on world domination.
== Royally Roman ==
Ach was born in the early 1520s. He comes from a lineage of Italian royalty, tracing his roots back to the guy who made the Mushroom Kingdom. Despite this, he was born in a manger in Rome on a small farm his immediate family owned which would be possessed by the Mushroom Kingdomian government and turned into a roundabout 7 seconds later. Ach's family moved to the downtown and could barely afford rent despite their riches. Ach witnessed his dad being killed in a steamroller accident, scarring him for life. But thanks to his hardworking mom, she was able to keep a roof over their heads by moving to a cheaper suburban and taking many jobs in the downtown. In school, he had a hard time focusing on his classwork, and thus had a bad time passing his classes. For this, his peers excluded him for being an idiot failure which made him super mad and super sad sometimes, scaring the children. Because of that, he got closer to his mom since she was the only one who cared about him. Anyway, he was so bad at school that he graduated at 19 years old (in this time period it's normally 12 years old). Due to the extended saddening period (8 whole years) he really let himself go, becoming EXTRA THICC in the bottom department, and the extended time with his mother, without a father figure he became a femboy (daddy issues cause femboys 100 gorbillion% of the time–mommy issues cause hitler). The job market thought that wasn't a good look for any company, so Ach never found a normal job. Instead, he found a brothel which was offering enough salary for him to rent a little suburb house for forever. The problem was that he had to work for a brothel, which meant turning into a whore. It was successful for him and the whorehouse, so successful that his mental instability increased tenfold, but he was able to hide it and eventually control it to get the money. It was extreme pain every day for him, which he kind of coped with by cooking good food with a cookbook.
Ach would be in that high-paying job for years until he met Rio2, the plumber he hired for his clogged toilet and kitchen sink. Ach accidentally left his front door unlocked the day Rio was supposed fix his pipeline. He was chilling in his bedroom when she entered his house. When he did get up from his room, he thought Rio was an intruder and almost hit her with his slippers. When things cooled down, Rio used her charisma and good looks to get Ach's phone number. Ach went on many dates with her, learning that her business could provide for both of them, so he quit his slut career and moved into her apartment. With the extra funds, he paid for education on shame programming. During this time, he cooked the meals, fixed the house, and stayed home most of the time. To alleviate some instability, he went out for sports with Igi, Rio's sister, and Isy, Igi's future husband.
== Stolen for the Thickness ==
Ach and Rio were going to get married one evening and everyone was there to see him become a wife (male). But then, a giant dragon turtle named Ser grabbed him and told everyone that she was taking him to her castle in Raccoon City. She even showed them a map that was supposed to take Rio and Igi on a predetermined path to 8 cities being tormented by 8 of Ser's minions. Ser dropped the map accidentally and had a fuss over it with Rio2 before leaving.
On the way to her lair, Ach was having a panic attack and Ser's constant talking made his emotional instability go off, making him super angry, sad, and confused. Ser hit a building because of that, and Ach nearly fell to his death, but with great concern (over his butt) Ser saved him from fall damage. The shock made him unconscious for the rest of the trip. At Ser's apartment, Ach woke up in a cage that a normal human could get out of by going in between the bars, but Ach's thiccness stopped him from getting out. Knowing he couldn't escape, he gave up in a slump, looking like a sad high school girl. Eventually getting over it, he asked Ser why she kidnapped him, which the answer was that she is femboysexual and Ach was the beautifullest, cutest, THICCEST femboy she has ever seen, and that she is going to marry him. He cried like a baby after hearing that.
Some time later, Ser was hungry but didn't know how to cook, and it didn't help that she only breathes ice. So, she asked Ach to cook a meal for her, which he refused. She used Idiot Manipulation to convince him to feed her, but she thought he could just use telekinesis through to cook from the cage, so she didn't have to let him free. Ach then used Idiot Manipulation to get Ser to free him from the cage, promising [CENSORED] to her. This worked and he started cooking, seeing no way out of the apartment, not that he would even try to escape. After finishing the meal, Ach used more Idiot Manipulation to get a computer into his cage. But since he is an idiot, he doesn't decide to get help through the internet, instead the purpose of the computer was so that he could work his programming job for Windows Internet Explorer shaming content. Ach thanks Ser for saving him from death (what a nice guy!).
=== Rio Takes Back ===
After a while, Rio on her quest to take back her thicc boy, Igi, Isy, Shi a space cat, and Salina some cold femboy, make it to Ser's apartment and beat her up with a bunch of sinks. Ach is made free, and he lightly kisses Rio on her forehead. They return to Rome and get married, Rio making sure to give Ach an extra-long kiss for his lame forehead kiss to her. All seems fine after Ser's defeat, Rio Sisters Plumbing Inc. is a success, Ach is still THICC, however, Ser returns one week later to kidnap Ach, but Rio and friends adventure to save him, again. This happens forever.
== The Incident ==
Shortly after Ser got defeated, Perui, Marui and Warui, Lurui, Yorui, Darui, and Bowrui come to steal the DNA of Ach, Rio, Igi, Shi, Isy, and Ser, respectively. This causes the creation of Peach, Mario and Wario (and Waluigi), Luigi, Yoshi, Daisy, and Bowser, which affects everything in the UnOmniverse.
Category:Guys
Category:Femboys
Category:Thicc
Category:Hotties
Category:Sexy Things
Category:Sexist
Category:Sexy
Category:Good guys
Category:Very Good People
Category:Cooks
Category:Distressed damsels
Category:Neutral guys
Category:Heroes friends with villains
Category:Heroes
Category:Guys with yellow hair
Category:Idiots
Category:Stupid guys
Category:White-skinned guys
Category:Italians