The Baby Outbreak Arc

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=== Act 5 Act 1: The Pokemonening ===
It was a nice day, John Egbert and Rose Lalonde venture back to Homestuck City for a bit of good ol' Pokemon Training. They finally have been released from prison (i am retconning this because it's funny. they were not actually in prison, but for the sake of lore, john and rose were in prison for undisclosed reasons) for their Pokemon adventure. They befriend Xenfeinsrndshsdj and Tavros. They mostly goof around and John tells Xenon and Tavros not to eat the Pokemon while Rose and John battle. John has a bulbasaur named Pogo. A rattata named Penelope Scott, and Rufioh. Quite literally Rufioh. In a Pokeball. So I guess that’s where he went after the murders. John used hyperbeam on Rose’s eevee named Jaspers (named after her dead umbreon) and they had to go to the hospital. They also watched a court case about a horse. I think the horse murdered someone, but the horse was most definitely innocent. They went back to the hospital to check on Jaspers and ended up talking about troll anatomy with Meenah. John was oh so wrong. About absolutely everything.
=== Act 5 Act 2: The Baby Outbreakening ===
Babies.
Babies everywhere.
Every one of the human babies. Everywhere.
All of them wanting Equius to be their father.
Insanity.
However, Equius is not a good father, and would not give the children milk or take them to the playground, so they left him, and spread their chaos. Baby Jake and Baby Dirk got in a fistfight. I.... don't know what happened with the other babies because I was Baby Jake fistfighting Baby Dirk and it took up all of my attention.
Then all the babies spontaneously combusted and people got REAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYY BIG. The biggest entity being Gender, obviously having the most gender. Other large entities include The False Prophet and Sun Karkat, the Karkat that was so big he ascended into the sun.
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