Misscliks: Pirate Edition: Chapter 1 Episode 14

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==Recap==
===Day 114, Part 2: The Art Of Negotiation===
Bookkeeping clarifications from last week: I did semi-randomly choose the genders of the ladies horses; Anna had at various points in various media referred to her horse as a she; that said, I'm not sure she was looking that hard. December's riding a stallion, Fe is riding a mare, and Elianna (who has claimed Kylia's horse) is riding a stallion.
They discuss what items are missing from Fe's potion - Tears from a Hydra, Gelatanous Cube Goo, and a Black Pearl.
Lily has a bit of a fascination with money. And seems to think pearl diver ships fly flags denoting them as such. She's very much for larcenous activities.
Elianna is after excitement - which she defines as killing things.
They start asking around in Squire Port about a black pearl; which is a laughable thing to the locals. There's no black pearls around these parts, and if one was found, it'd probably be owned by a king, and worth tens of thousands of gold.
Speaking to the merchants in the marketplace, the King (or more specifically, the queen) has a black pearl on a necklace, valued somewhere between 2 and 10 thousand gold.
They make their way to the bar; ordering a round of drinks (4c). The Local Source of Information (also known as the Bartender) indicates that if the girls hang out near the port, they should be able to find work hauling goods or people. December tries to sell the Captain Anemoi routine to the bartender, who is less-than-believing.
December steals the flagon of beer she's got. Fe, Keeper of the Rum (EL: of course the Monk would do that), reports that the rum storage is low. They decide to buy a barrel this time (which is twice the size of a keg), for 26g.
At the docks, they go looking for work. December gives Matt the flagon she stole. A group of 5 adventurers are looking for a ship to transport them to and from Klendathu. Lily the Larcenous sets a ridiculously high price for the ship's usage, and the adventurers walk away from the deal.
By the end of the day, the only other job offer is the transport of dangerous animals (10) to Redstone Port. A tiger, water buffalo, a basilisk (in a sealed box), a giant scorpion, a talking monkey, an elvan cat... the zoo-keeper will bring people to manage the animals and food for the animals. The girls agree to do it for 650g.
December makes sure none of the crew will go near the animals - by threatening to cut off their rum supply if they do, which has the desired effect.
===Day 116: The Monkey's Master===
The ship has an 8th crew member (must have been on bilge duty this whole time. Poor sap.), an App 7 someone.
The ship picks up 4 extra people seeking transport to Redstone Port (4g). December gives a swimming lesson (7), Lily gives a reading lesson (2).
During the journey, Fe tries to butter up the owner of the talking monkey, trying to get an audience with the animal. She fails to do so, but they discuss Frank, which is the monkey's name. He's apparently single, and chose his own name. (EL: I'm not sure where this conversation was going. Fe seems to have walked down a romance novel path at some point. The Monkey and the Monk. It's got a ring to it.)
The crew decide they might go check out the royal wedding, to which the animals are bound for a show.
===Day 121: That Uneasy Feeling===
Lily learns Locate Object on the journey.
The wedding is in 10 days time; the rare-animal keeper will be back in Redstone Port in 2 weeks time, and may be able to discuss selling Frank to Fe at that time, assuming the King has not purchased him by then.
They decide that they don't quite feel safe hanging around in Redstone Port, after their last visit resulted in the jailbreak of every ne'er-do-well in the city; December suggests they sail to Orlan Sands, and then ride inland and north to Valis. Soon, the Nealing Siren pulls out of port, headed south.
===Day 122: Dinner And Daggers===
The ship makes port in Orlan Sands, and the group ride out on horseback. In the evening the group arrives at Elder Pine, and settle in to the local tavern. Lily is on the prowl for hot guys; this prompts a discussion about the characters' sexuality. Dana declares Elianna straight, and hunting for the hottest elven guy. Stephanie and Gen both roll for sexuality, but the rolls are not disclosed, neither to the public or each other. Anna declines to comment before she's ready to (EL: I still say that December has no concept of sexual orientation at this point, but it's not my character).
Lily's discussion with a shorter (not shorter than her, just short) woman does not go well. Short jokes, while a shared hurt, are not welcome.
Suddenly, 6 armed men burst in through the tavern door, looking to rob the patrons of their goods.
Combat - The Heroes of Elder Pine. This is a nearly disastrous fight for the crew, Elianna being taken out of combat very early, and armor once again hindering the damage output. Fe and December both face down being double-teamed, and December manages to be both incredibly good (5 crits, one of which being a triple crit), and incredibly bad (a triple-crit-failure) in the same battle.
Lily loots a long sword, a knife, a set of studded leather armor, and 2s. In mid combat.
Fe secures the last of the bandits, rather than knocking him out. He apparently is the hottest guy Fe has ever seen in her life, flustering her. December is in a cold bloodrage, having nearly been rendered unconscious during the fight (December and Fe are both severely injured. Elianna is still unconscious, but stable.) and tries to kill him repeatedly, while Fe and Lily try to prevent her from doing so.
The tavern is cheering the girls for having stopped the brigands. Lily tends to Elianna, with December\ aid once she's calmed herself a bit. Fe interogates the man, who identifies himself as Balkan. The standard poor-man-turned-petty-criminal tale. Turns out he burned down his house cooking. (EL: A cooking skill of 3. Ouch.)
Lily turns around and decides to poll the crowd if the survivor should live or die like shes the emperor of Rome, but when they call for death, Lily finds herself unable to go through with it on a defenseless target (EL: What about all the sleeping guards?). She instead goes to loot, since obviously the dead and unconscious are less worthy of rights. Unfortunately, the bar's already picked the bodies clean. She gets rather upset at this, causing an scene... which allows Balkan to make a break for it while Lily's distracting Fe. Injured all over the place, Fe and December chase after him, and catch him; city guards in tow (EL: So the city guards have the same response time as most police forces). They haul Balkan away to jail, while the ladies return to the tavern.
The injuries severe (Elianna -6, December 2, Fe 1), the ladies seek a medic, but this town is so small there is no one here with the skills. The town offers free food and lodging for the group for saving their money, which they decide to accept and wait for Elianna to wake.
===Day 124: Conju-Wha?===
Fe goes to visit "Number 18" (Balkan). (EL: And that's all i'm gonna say on that.)
===Day 128: Just Visiting; The Funny Thing About Ropes===
Lily Learns Rope Trick (EL: Lily has Athletics 4. Rope Trick inherently requires a rope climb. I can see nothing going wrong with this.). Fe practices lassoing, including lassoing from her horse. December spends time with her horse. General relaxation and recovery is had. (Elianna: 1 HP. December: 7 HP. Fe: 6 HP.) Neal warns Gen that an extradimensional space inside an extradimensional space is a bad idea. When Elianna wakes up, she heals herself twice. (Elianna: 14/16.)
The group goes to visit the prisoners in jail. Only 2 are still alive, Balkan and another guy. They discuss potentials for him, but decide not to pursue anything. They ride out for the wedding.
===Day 129: On The Road Again===
The group passes through Kanto, Elianna healing December and Fe (Fe: 15/19 HP December: Full HP, Elianna: 15/16). They make it to Fendrik, and decide to rest rather than push themselves through the night.
===Day 130: Marriage And Murder===
A new day dawns. (Fe: 16/19). The group makes their way to Valis, which is in full celebration mode; people getting drunk, revelling and such.
The newly styled (EL: not minted.) Prince and Princess make their way out to the balcony of the castle to wave to the crowd, the King and Queen joining them in the royal fashion.
"I wanna be a princess" "You were one for a few days, and it almost got us killed." -Lily and Fe
Suddenly, the King stumbles forward, grabs his back, and falls off the balcony. The others on the balcony turn, in time to see two figures dressed darkly emerge from the door and stab them; they are all pushed/fall off of the balcony. The party shoves their way forward.
Reaching the bodies, Elianna starts to triage the situation. The King is Dead (Long Live the King!), his neck snapped from the fall; the Prince is also dead (Okay, maybe not so Long); the Princess has succumbed to her wound, but the Queen yet clings to life. Elianna's dark energies reach out and heal the queen. ("Heal Queen-Bitch"). She gasps to consciousness, and grabs her stomach. Her pain overcomes her again, and she passes out.
The ladies (along with guard escort/detainers) get the queen indoors. As we close our show for Week 14, Lily notices a familiar face - Black Claw, dressed in normal civilian attire, is slipping away.
* Recap from EtoileLion on reddit. Editoral notes are theirs.
Category:Misscliks Pirate Edition Episodes