Season 11/Songs

=="Dream a Little Bob of Bob"==
==="'Tina Hand Song"===
Tina & Background Singer: 
Tina: Look what Tina can do with her hands,
Look what Tina can do with her hands,
Look what Tina can do with her hands,
Look what Tina can do with her hands,
Background: Look what Tina,
Can do with her hands,
Tina: Boob, fart, nips, tips, double dips,
And that's why we drove off the cliff
Background: Look what Tina,
Can do with her hands,
Tina: Hell yeah! Hell yeah!
Look what Tina can do with her hands,
Look what Tina can do with her hands,
Look what Tina can do with her hands,
=="Worms of In-Rear-Ment"==
==="'Scratchy Bottom Song"===
Linda, Bob, Gene & Tina: 
Linda: One thing I've always wanted since I was very small,
Was to be the best damn mommy,
The bestest of 'em all,
I'd be loving, I'd be kind, but also fair and firm,
But now their report cards are full of D's,
And their butts are full of worms!
Oh, I'm a bad, bad mom,
And it was my favorite job,
And I'm gonna scratch my bottom right now
Bob, Tina & Gene: What if we all scratched our butts against each other's butts?
No, that's stupid, okay, maybe not,
Linda: If only I had taken them to the symphony,
When they were still young,
They'd be getting all straight A's and be so clean between their bums,
Oh, I'm a bad, bad, mom and it was my favorite job,
And I'm gonna scratch my bottom right now. 
==="Butt Worms"===
Linda & Background Singers
Linda: 
Linda: Butt worms,
Background: Doodley-ooh,
Linda: Butt worms,
Background: Doodley-ooh,
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
Linda: Oh, it's itchy,
Butt worms,
Background: Doodley-ooh,
Linda: Butt worms,
 Background: Doodley-ooh
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
Linda: Scratchin' and you're tushin', 
a tushie and a scratchy,
A wormy in your tushie,
sent your tushies in a-scratchin'
Scratch-Scratch-Scratcha,
Itchy, itchy, itchy,
Who invited you worms into my butt, anyway?
Linda: Butt worms,
Background: Doodley-ooh,
Linda: Butt worms,
Background: Doodley-ooh,
=="Copa-Bob-bana"==
==="'I Like Bananas"===
Calvin and Linda:
Calvin & Linda: All day and night, love
Because of or in spite of we love each other just the same, love
we love each other just the same,
Linda: I like bananas in muffins and scones,
Calvin: I like bananas when I'm making a phone
Together: All day and night, love,
Because of or in spite of,
We love each other just the same...
=="Heartbreak Hotel-oween"==
==="'Spooky Soiree"===
Singers:
I went on down to the party next door,
The music sounded groovy and I wanted more,
Then at the end, that's when things got weird,
Cause everyone there had been dead for years,
It was a spooky soireee,
La, la, la, la,
Those ghouls could shimmy and shake,
La, la, la, la,
It was a spooky soiree,
La, la, la, la,
They're dancin' back from the grave,
La, la, la, la,
That Guy's dead and that guy's dead and that lady died peacefully in bed,
That guy doin' the boogaloo,
Pretty darn sure that he's dead too,
=="Fast Time Capsules at Wagstaff School"==
==="'Someday We'll Spoon"===
Tina, Louise Tammy, Jocelyn & Boyz4Now:
Tina:Someday we'll spoon not anytime soon,
It's about the future,
I'm gonna hold you,
Tina & Louise: When we're much older,
Tina, Louise, Tammy & Jocelyn: Till then I'll gently touch your shoulder,
Boyz4Now: And if the moment's felling right I'll squeeze your hand to say,
Good night,
Someday we'll spoon,
Not anytime soon,
Someday We'll spoon,
Not anytime soon,
I'm gonna hold you,
When we're much older,
Till then I'll gently touch your shoulder,
And if the moment's felling right I'll squeeze your hand to say...
=="Bob Belcher and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Kids"==
==="'It's All My Fault (Gene Version)"===
Gene:
I woke up in the night cause I was on a mission,
To get downstairs and do some mermaid fixing,
Her hair was a mess and I knew what to do,
But then a rumble in my tummy said I needed to poo,
I was felling light, like I could dance a jig,
I grabbed the crimping iron and my favorite wig, 
It's time for your hair to strut, no more limping,
I plopped on that wig and then I got to crimping,
I went back upstairs knowing we'd win but I left the crimping iron plugged in,
It's all my fault,
I set the restaurant on fire,
It's all my fault,
I burnt my dad's dreams with my wiggy desires
==="'It's All Gene's Fault (Louise Version)"===
Louise:
I woke up from a dream in the middle of the night,
And thought of a way to win the gold,
Help Mom's sculpture really stand out,
By making the mermaid explode,
I'm talking M-80s, bottle rockets, Roman candles, sky missiles, or even dynamite-- I didn't have any of that stuff,
But I had some sparklers and those things are fun enough...
It's all Gene's fault,
He set the restaurant on fire,
And maybe it's partially my fault too but Gene's guilt definitely ranks higher
==="'It's All Our Fault (Tina Version)"===
Tina, Gene & Louise:
Tina: I wanted to fix that ugly mer-thing so we could win the prize,
I wasn't expecting the mermaid's crimped hair and sparklers stuck all over everywhere,
I thought she'd look better in a blue bikini instead of just being all throw-up greeny,
The paint was pretty wet so I plugged in a fan which in hindsight might not have been a great plan,
Tina, Gene & Louise: It's all our fault,
We set the restaurant on fire,
It's all our fault everything went haywire
==="'It's All Hugo's Fault (Hugo Version)"===
Ron, Tina, Gene & Louise:
Ron: It's all Hugo's fault,
He burnt your restaurant,
It's all Hugo's fault,
Even though he didn't want to mention it,
Tina, Gene & Louise: It's not our fault,
Tina: (Spoken) I mean the stuff we did didn't help,
Louise: (Spoken) Tina shush,
Tina, Gene & Louise: It's not our fault,
Louise: It's nice to get to blame someone else,
Tina, Gene, Louise & Ron: It's all Hugo's fault
==="'It's Not Their Fault"===
Singers:
It's not their fault,
Background: They didn't set the restaurant on fire,
Not their fault,
Background:They didn't burn it down, oh no,
Not their fault,
They didn't set the restaurant on fire,
Not their fault,
They didn't set the restaurant on fire,
Background:They didn't burn it down, oh no,
Oh, oh, oh, oh....
Oh, oh, oh, oh....
=="Diarrhea of a Poopy Kid"==
==="'Turkey I Need You"===
Gene & Bob:
Gene: Turkey, I need you beside me,
I need all of you, I need your breast and thigh meat,
Bob: Turkey, I need you beside me,
I need all of you, I need your breast and thigh meat,
Gene: And what's that hiding in your hole?
Bob: Giblets, stuffing, gravy,
Gene: Some stuffing for my heart and soul,
I could still be a winner,
When I eat that Thanksgiving dinner,
Gene & Bob: Turkey, I need you beside me,
I need all of you, I need your breast and thigh meat
=="The Terminalator II Terminals of Endearment"==
==="'Looking for Grandpa"===
Singers:
Ooh, Looking for Grandpa,
Looking for Grandpa,
Looking for Grandpa,
 I'm looking everywhere,
but grandpa's not there
==="'Got Our Wings"===
Louise:
We'll show you the world,
Clouds, planes and things,
Up, up, up, up, up in the sky,
We'll show you the world,
Birds, blimps and things,
Up, up, up, up, up in the sky,
We've got our wings,
We've got our wings,
Got our wings
Up, up, up, up, up in the sky
=="Mommy Boy"==
==="'Businesswomen"===
Linda:
Businesswomen, look at us go,
Doing all the business from our head to our toes,
I feel so empowered, I feel ten out of ten,
Cause I'm talking lots of business with these businesswomen,
Where should I put my name tag,
Should I put it here, no, should I put it here, no,
Should I put it here, no, Should I put it here, no, 
Should I put it here, no, Should I put it here, no, 
Should I put it here, no, Should I put it here, no, 
Should I put it here, no, Should I put it here?
==="'Look of the Lion"===
Singers:
Look of the lion,
Starin' 'em down,
Look of the lion..
=="Yachty or Nice"==
==="'How'd I do as Santa?"===
Teddy & Belcher Family:
Teddy: How did I do as Santa Claus?
Sorry guys but Santa's insecure,
Did you find my beard convincing?
Did my reindeer need a rinsing?
Were you buying this at all?
I wasn't sure,
How did I do as Santa Claus?
Rate me on a scale of one to ten,
Bob: Uh, pass.
Louise: Well, your stomach shook like jelly.
Teddy: Okay.
Gene: But your beard was kind of smelly.
Teddy: Oh.
Belchers: We'd recommend this Santa to our friends.
Linda: Yeah! Now, that's Christmas.
=="Romancing the Beef"==
==="'Urge is the Word"===
Singers:
Urge, urge
Is the wordge, wordge
Urge, urge
Is the wordge, oh
They're makin' it swanky it's money in the bank-y,
Urge is the wordge
==="'Children Watching You"===
Gene:
It's okay, we're just children watching you,
It's okay, we're just children watching you,
Just pretend that we're not here,
As you grope each other's rears,
Just pretend you're not with us,
Do your hanky-panky business,
It's okay, Background singers: It's okay,
We're just children watching you Singers: La, la, la,
It's okay, Background singers: It's okay,
We're just children watching you
=="Die Card, or Card Trying"==
==="'Candy Cane Moose"===
Linda:
Candy cane moose we've had since Tina was born,
People think you're a reindeer but you're not you're a moose,
Candy cane moose we've had since Tina was born,
People think you're a reindeer but you're not you're a moose,
Clothespain angel, Background singers: Clothespain angel, 
Clothespain angel, Background singers: Clothespain angel, Kiss 'em, kiss 'em,
Clothespain angel, Background singers: Come, kiss em' kiss em,
Clothespain angel, Background singers: Come, kiss em' kiss em,
Yeah!
=="An Incon-Wheelie-ent Truth"==
==="Wheelie Mammoth"===
Singers:
He's a funky beast,
With moves and grooves,
That'll blow your mind,
Wheelie, Wheelie Mammoth,
Wheelie, Wheelie Mammoth,
Wheelie Mammoth,
Wheelie Mammoth,
Wheelie, Wheelie Mammoth,
Watchin' him roll all around the floor,
It makes you wanna move like you're pre-historic,
Wheelie, Wheelie Mammoth,
Wheelie, Wheelie Mammoth,
Wheelie Mammoth,
Wheelie, Wheelie Mammoth,
Wheelie Mammoth,
=="Mr. Lonely Farts"==
==="On My Own"===
Gene:
Green peppers give me gas unless they're in a scone,
These are thoughts I'm thinking, when I'm all alone,
Is taupe a real color?
I wanna free solo up that shelf,
These are things I'm thinking when I'm by myself,
My knees have weird wrinkles,
My butt makes weird sounds,
Maybe I can still have fun with no one else around,
I'm gonna keep thinkin' 'cause it's keepin' me calm,
Robots and music and banh mi from Vietnamm,
I enjoy being with people, maybe too much,
And Ken is a delight but maybe kind of a crutch,
I didn't think I'd feel this way till I was grown,
But it turns out I'm fine being here on my own!
=="Sheshank Redumption"==
==="The Poop Song"===
The Belchers:
Linda I started eating healthy but it made me have to deuce now,
I tried to do it stealthy but I landed in the hoosegow,
This song I'd like to dedicate to everyone who's defecate-ed in public,
Belchers Try to hold it, try to hold it, just as long as you can,
For there might be repercussions if you try and drop anchor,
Try and hold it, try to hold it, try to hold it,
Try to hold it, try to hold it, try to hold it, hold it hold it in,
Linda: I'm gonna make it, I'm not gonna break it,
Gonna hold it, gonna hold it, hold it in.
=="Y Tu Tina También"==
==="'The Popsicle Song"===
Tina & Background Singers:
Background singers: Popsicle, la, la, la,
Tina: Running down your chest,
Background singers: Popsicle, la, la, la,
Tina: Making quite a mess,
Background singers: Popsicle, la, la, la,
Tina: Should we take off your shirt?
Background singers: Popsicle, la, la, la,
Tina: I mean it couldn't hurt,
I'm trying to focus on this language lab,
But all I can see are those sticky Spanish abs,
Our fruit market rendezvous I'll always savor,
I still can't believe that your were eaten by an alligator.
=="Fingers-loose"==
==="Handy Prance"===
Tina, Gene & Louise:
Tina: Hey it's time to do the handy prance,
Yeah it's time to let your digits dance,
Gene & Louise: It doesn't matter if your moves are fancy,
Get to the boiler room and take a chance-y
Tina, Gene & Louise: Put some clothing on your fingers, 
Come and join the swingers with Gene,
Let's see those fingers kicking,
Background: Dance, Dance, Dance, Dance, Dance, Dance,
Tina, Gene & Louise: Don't be a chicken.
Dance, dance, do the handy prance,
Tina, Gene & Louise: Don't sit there lickin',
Background: Dance, dance, dance, dance,
Tina, Gene & Louise: Or Pickin' or lickin' or pickin'
Background: Dance, dance,
Tina, Gene & Louise: Or sometimes flickin'
Background: Dance, dance,
Tina, Gene & Louise: Your brother's hand is cool, you can't resist her,
Dress in horse's clothes and join him, sister 
=="Some Kind of Fender Benderful"==
==="Taking Responsibility"===
Patti, Graham, Bob, Officer Bridget, Elaine:
Patti: I was distracted by my wiener dog,
So it's almost my fault, I think
Graham: And I was on my cell phone,
Didn't see what was going on so I can't say my poop don't stink,
Patti: Because taking responsibility for your actions,
Graham: Oh is the real path to satisfaction
Bob, Graham, Patti: The Only thing that works in life,
Is not being a jerk in life,
All: Taking responsibility is the best way to be for you sand for me.
==="Responsibility"===
Patti, Graham, Bob, Officer Bridget, Elaine:
Responsibility for your actions,
Is the real path to satisfaction,
The only thing that works in life,
Is not being a jerk in life,
Taking responsibility's the best way to be for you and for me.
Bob: Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Singers: For you, and...
Bob: Responsibility.
Singers: ...for me.
Bob: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
=="Bridge Over Troubled Rudy"==
==="Moving an Explosive Bridge"===
Singers:
Singers: We're moving an explosive bridge,
Explosive bright, ooh, ooh,
We're moving an explosive bridge,
Explosive bright, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
==="The Breathing Song"===
Bob & Linda:
Singers: Breathe in, breathe in,
Breathe out, breathe out,
Breathe in, breathe in,
Breathe out...
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
Bob: (Echoing) Come back to the breath. Breathe in. (inhales) Breathe out. (exhales)
Linda: (Spoken) I meditated. I went deep.
Bob: (Spoken) Oh god. Being relaxed is exhausting.
Breathe, in breathe in,
Breathe out, breathe out,
Breathe in, breathe in,
Breathe out...
Linda: (Spoken) I think I'm starting to feel something.
=="Steal Magazine-olias"==
==="I Did It!"===
Teddy:
Teddy I did it! Background singers: He did it.
Teddy: I got the poop off, I did it, Background: Got the poop off,
I'll tell you how, Oh, I did it, Background He did it,
I got the poop off, I did it!
Background: Tell us how you did it,
Teddy: Ha! You got to do it with your heart, Background: Do it with your heart,
Teddy: Oh yeah, You got to do it with your gut, oh yeah,
You got to do it with your arms, oh no,
You got to do it, but most importantly, you got to do it properly, oh yeah
=="Tell Me Dumb Thing Good"==
==="The Posting Song"===
Bob:
My heart has been coasting,
Since the last posting,
Don't know if you're growing,
There's no way of knowing,
Did you become salad?
This is my ballad,
I need to see you again,
When will I see you again?
==="Dumb Things"===
Linda & Singers:
Linda: My trash can is a funky can,
Background singers: A Can do can,
Linda; My trash can is a funky can,
Dumb things,
Background: Dumb little things,
Linda: Can be fun things
Background: Fun little things,
Linda: Dumb things,
Background: Dumb little things,
Linda: Can be fun things
Background: Fun little things,
Linda: Dumb, fun, ooh,
Background Ooh,
Linda: My trash can is a funky can,
Background singers: A Can do can,
Linda; My trash can is a funky can,
Dumb things,
Background: Dumb little things,
Linda: Can be fun things,
Background: Fun little things,
=="Vampire Disco Death Dance"==
==="'I'm All Over You"===
Female Vampire:
I've been alive for 300 years,
Had a thousand lovers, seen a million fears,
In men's eyes, let me explain,
It means nothing to me when I slurp their veins
Kevin: Wait, you're going to do what?
But this boy Kevin makes my heart flutter want to see him tonight underneath my covers,
Audience: 'Cause I, oh, oh oo, I,
Am all over you, Ooh, ooh, ooh,
Vampire: (Spoken) Um, why do you smell like garlic?
Audience: Uh-oh.
Kevin: (Spoken) There might be a little garlic on my overalls.
Vampire: Why don't you go head and take those off? I want to see what's under those overalls.
Kevin: Okay.
Tina: Oh wow.
Audience: 'Cause I, oh, oh oo, I,
Am all over you, Ooh, ooh, ooh,
'Cause I, oh, oh oo, I,
Am all over you, Ooh, ooh, ooh,
==="'Shake your love parts"===
Bob & Tina:
Shake your love parts,
Bump it on the floor,
Shake your love parts,
Shake it more and more,
Shake your love parts,
I just can't stop believing,
Shake your love parts,
Your love parts got me screaming,
Eternal love is groovin'
I bite your neck, it's soothin',
Shake your love parts,
Bump it on the floor,
Shake your love parts,
Shake it more and more,
Shake your love parts,
Bump it on the floor,
Shake your love parts...
Category:Music
Category:Songs