Bygone Bastards

The Bygone Bastards were a group of unlikely allies from Bygone, who came together in the spring of 1593. They embarked upon adventures in Halcyon together.
== Members ==
* Alabaster, a suave social changeling mendaxomancer who took every chance they could to con their foes in a fanciful and elaborate way.
* Edmund Morse, a gruff half-orc troubled by his dark past, grappling with returning secrets.
* Talia / Iris Loveridge-Althier, an experienced and sunglassed half-orc knight struggling with aeomantic disruptions.
* Ezra Stormwind, a pretty-looking worldly traveller and seiromancer of the Moon Phoenix, childhood friends with Talia.
* Roth Ullrson, a huge, thick-headed, strong, amazing, haunted beserker from the inhospitable wastes of Tarkassia
* Skeggi Krogstad, a jeweller from Kol Darim and quick fingered thief.
== Episodes ==
=== I: Pleased to Meat You ===
The gang becomes The Gang after meeting at the request of the notably unsanitary chef Big Mike. They get given an assignment to go track down and rescue a thief named Foxglove. They beat the everloving shit out of a bunch of goons who try to rob the diner, before heading up Halcyon's canals with the eccentric boatman Béla. The gang eats a lot of cinnamon rolls and meatballs before following some chalk markings and getting the lay of the land in Halcyon's richer district, Dorado. Talia takes the gang to her dad's house, who turns out to be Maxwell Loveridge, and Ezra's foster father too, it sounds like. Roth takes a bath for the first time.
=== II: An Unforgettable Luncheon ===
Morse almost shoots Alabaster because he's haunted by his tragic past. The gang eats eggs and bacon before Talia and her dad argue, and the gang has to leave the Loveridge house. They investigate a noble family's house and find Foxglove, and also end up working out that plants keep dying near Morse. Alabaster uses their changeling abilities to get a free seafood lunch at a fancy restaurant. The waiter calls them steamed clams despite the fact they are obviously grilled. The gang goes to church to see Ezra's sister Jeyda. A bunch of goth girl cultists show up and kill a monk. 
=== III: Take Me To Church ===
The gang fights off a shit ton of shadow spirits. Ezra kills most of them with the power of God, and Roth somehow suplexes a ghost. Morse's patron forces him to to betray the party, and he manages to almost kill Ezra's sister, but promptly gets his shit kicked in. Alabaster tells a joke that has him on the floor. 
=== IV: Arts and Crafts ===
Alabaster, Ezra, Talia and Roth eat noodles with chopsticks, a fork, a spoon, and bare hands (respectively). A gem thief named Skeggi joins the party. The gang gets a tour of the Halcyon Grandstand museum using Douglas Silverhorn's identity. They see the necklace and other goods in the highly secure vault of the Halcyon Freeport and realise that this job is a lot bigger than they anticipated. Later, Roth gets butt naked, and Ezra translates a forbidden text. 
=== V: Business and Pleasure ===
The gang runs some errands. Talia eats bacon in bed, and Alabaster forges some letters. The gang takes a lot of trains all over the city. Ezra opens up about his mentor, Gui Fiery. Talia orders the Ultra Espresso™ and Alabaster orders a coffee too long for this paragraph. They all look up some old books at Mackenzie University, before heading back to Bygone. Béla gives Al a really smooth ride, and the gang discusses the plan with Big Mike before heading to Original Sin for business with Clovis and pleasure with the milfs and twinks of Halcyon. The gang meets Consul Richárd Dread, who's kinda hot.
=== VI: The Cut and Rum ===
The gang parts with their cash aboard Selim's market-barge, and buy some oddities. Alabaster drinks from the sigma grindset chalice. Roth brings the dig crew along and they all head down south. Alabaster pretends to get electrocuted, The gang clears out the old service tunnel and fights a great big worm; Roth throws a keg of rum at its face and Alabaster blows it up with a gunshot. The worm is crushed, and the gang barely escape with their lives. One of the workers, Smith, isn't so lucky. But all in all, the tunnel is cleared, even if a bit dislodged. 
== Acquaintances (i gave up) ==
Along their travels, they made friends with several interesting folk.
*Big Mike, a local butcher and crime boss who they met several others via.
*Ubba, Big Mike's fellow cook.
*Béla Szedzeky, a canalboat coachman and coal merchant with a thick Vrei accent, who loved his boat, Fortunato.
*Madeä Foxglove, one of Big Mike's thieves.
*Maxwell Loveridge, who as it was revealed was Talia's father. There were arguments, though.
*Gawk, Maxwell's butler.
*Ana, Maxwell's secretary and confidant
== Adventure Logs (i got tired and stopped doing them) ==
=== 1 ===
We all met in Big Mike's Diner, a real band of misfits. These were Edmund, Talia, Ezra, Alabaster and Roth. After introductions over some drinks. Chef Ubba fetched us and we chatted to Big Mike himself in his somewhat unsafe kitchen. He told us that one of his agents, Foxglove, got stuck in Halcyon when the bridges closed. We prepared to leave, but a barfight broke out when some petty local thieves tried their hand at robbing the place. We swiftly beat the everloving shit out of all but a few of them. The Watch then came in, led by a Jackboot. We overheard the conversation, with the Jackboot warning Big Mike about this. After recruiting one of the surviving gang members, named Raul, we went with Big Mike's charismatic coal guy, Béla, and to the docks. We boarded his ship Fortunato, which he seemed to really like. Along the ride, we all chatted a little more about our origins and where we came from, and Béla got along with Alabaster pretty well too. We dirtied ourselves with coal or vanished and managed to blag our way through the canal checkpoint, and continued through glorious golden Halcyon to the docks, where Béla left us. After spending some time at the market buying cinnamon rolls and meatballs, we found Foxglove's last location; a city block near the Grandstand Museum in Dorado. We followed a chalk drawing in Thieves' Cant to Rykeworth House, a thin terraced home nearby, finding an X on the catflap but having to scram when we saw some coppers on patrol. Talia took us to her father's house to stay the night, where we learnt that he was in fact Maxwell Loveridge. Some awkward conversations were had over dinner between Maxwell and Ezra too, only broken by Alabaster asking for Virion's autograph. Roth had his first ever bath, and we all went to bed in a golden new city.
=== 2 ===
Morse awoke from a nightmare and almost shot Al. When Talia woke up, she was briefly overtaken by the echo, and Ezra's decision to study it before helping her caused some arguing. Over breakfast in House Loveridge, we read about the missing Minister Roquefort. An even bigger argument happened after the bacon and eggs, between Maxwell and Ezra+Talia. This ended in a plate smashing and us deciding to leave the house for good. We got into the Rykeworth House using some trickery and Roth's brute strength, and found it empty. Wood and plants rotted near us. We found evidence someone had been here; and after some suspense, found Foxglove wounded upstairs. After helping her, she told us the deal; she had scoped out an amazing target, the Halcyon Grandstand museum's jewel clad treasures. However, she went to the theatre, some lights dimmed, then she fell unconscious and woke up with some purple wounds. We promised to return tomorrow, then went off to lunch, where Al disguised themself as one of the Di Lamendolio family and managed to get us an expensive Thousand Islands lunch at a gourmet seafood restaurant. We chatted about our theories, lives, & thoughts over some shark and cocktails. "You call these steamed sharks despite the fact they are obviously... clams"We then went to flirt with drop off a note for the boss to our favourite Vreigardt boat driver, Béla, before visiting the Shelter of Her Light church. Brother Hudson directed us to Priestess Jeyda, who as it turned out, was Ezra's sister! After a brief reunion, she seemed to be harmed by Morse's handshake. We went downstairs and pea stew was prepared whilst we waited. Jeyda took Morse aside to ask something, but he ran back for help after it seemed she collapsed suddenly, weakened. Just then, Brother Hudson was stabbed with hemoneedles by our old friend, the death lady Venë from the cold case, and her gang of goth girls.
=== 3 ===
Venë asked us to hand over Jeyda. We stauntly refused, so one of her lieutenants, Znava, summonned many shadow spirits that we had to fight off. Talia dueled Znava as Roth picked up shadows and threw tem into Ezra's holy aura. Talia charmed Znava, but then Morse disintegrated her. There was an argument over this hasty resolution with little information found. This escalated, and Morse summoned his patron's spirit, which then devolved into a full on fight, as he tried to flee, then stood and fought, but with Alabaster's crippling words, Talia's persistent fury, Roth's huge axe and Ezra's warding light, Morse fell and was killed (though not before gravely wounding Jeyda). After all this, we slept, much worry in our minds. In the morning, we bumped into Douglas Silverhorn, a Darim envoy come to facilitate a deal with the museum. We sensed an opportunity here, and sent him off to his lodgings, planing to follow later.
Category:Factions