Kretin

“	"It's the recent change in behavior I noticed what bugs me, like the shit talking and stuff no reason for that, it just makes the community bad, and that's a terrible thing."	”
 	—Kretin, being super ironic 	—Kretin, being super ironic
Kretin, self-styled as Kretin von Cretin, was a longtime veteran of Dragonhollow, founder of The Enclave, and an outspoken critic of Eris and her policies.
=History=
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===Second Era===
	Tox: hello Kretin<BR>Kretin: hi :D<BR>Kretin: only person i remember<BR>Panda: D:<BR>Panda: You don't remember me?<BR>Kretin: nope<BR>Panda: We were best fwends!<BR>Kretin: yeah i dont remember you at all<BR>Kretin: just tox<BR>Panda: lol<BR>Tox: it happens	
	—Kretin can't quite remember Panda 	—Kretin can't quite remember Panda
Kretin immigrated to Swampwater on 2E:66 at the behest of his old chum Jack Firebane. He built a humble house and was known to philosophize and quote from famous thinkers.
Kretin was a talented warrior, placing 3rd in the Third Coliseum Games and being declared champion of the Fourth Coliseum Games.
On 2E:89, Kretin won the Hide and Seek event.
His verified success in the Dragon Temple earned him a place in the parkour's coveted Hall of Fame.
While visiting Swampwater, Kretin came under attack from the ender dragon Sunspark when she escaped into the overworld due to an experiment by Eris that went awry. He joined forces with Matto and Azureila and together the trio were able to force the flying beast to flee.
He obtained his passport and traveled to the Woodlands, living for a time at Jckfrbn Castle. He built a watchtower nearby, which was later damaged by Terry who erroneously thought it belonged to Jack himself.
Kretin was a member of Jack's Organization for Unified Chaos and joined in their resistance to the Brotherhood of Steel during the Steel War. Jack got more than he bargained for when Kretin and Wolf griefed one of his properties for the cause, leading Firebane to kill Kretin many times.
Kretin proposed a program wherein citizens who had accrued negative claimblocks and were unable to claim new territory with the golden shovel could file for bankruptcy protections through Eris. His motion was defeated 6-5 and was criticized by Eris, but soon after she introduced claim bankruptcy anyway. S&T Credit would later sponsor his bankruptcy.
On 2E:137, he founded the Enclave to counter the Brotherhood of Steel and their Proclamation of Peace. As vice president and colonel of the Enclave armies, he led them into battle during the Steel War. He was part of the reconnaissance mission that found the Brotherhood's hidden Redwood HQ, a discovery that contributed to their eventual defeat.
===Later Life===
	"Being the Engineer I am, I would be a valuable member to the DragonHollow team...or something like that [lawlsl] not afraid to touch Tutu's either -Hugs and kisses, Love Kretin [#Wink]"	
	—Kretin makes his case to join the Priesthood 	—Kretin makes his case to join the Priesthood
In the Third Era, Kretin built a watchtower on the outskirts of Northham. When the Enclave declared war on the Dragonslayers on 3E:3, the tower served as their headquarters during the fierce urban combat between rival towers.
Kretin entered the Northlands Best Build Contest, but did not make the final cut for prizes.
On 3E:16, he made a bid to join the Priesthood of Eris. Despite support from both the Archpriestess of Eris Azureila and Architect of Eris AJ, he was rejected partially due to the testimony of his comrade Jack Firebane.
Kretin took a leadership role during the Northham Town Hall Meeting, passionately arguing against the policy changes Eris implemented in the Northlands. While he was unsuccessful in rallying his peers to his cause, most of his recommendations would later come to pass in the Fourth Era.
He left the war-torn ruins of the Northlands behind and made his way to Cabbage, where the former Dragonslayer HyperSilence had established a community for Dragonhollow refugees during the Dark Age.
In the Fourth Era, Kretin visited Summergate and Bad Landing periodically to inexplicably shout vulgar expletives and then leave. Some older members of the community feared he had suffered irreparable brain damage in the days since Northham. This puzzling behavior continued into the Fifth Era in Pandora.
He was a member of the Dragonkin.
Kretin briefly made an appearance on 6E:1, when he announced he was a god and encouraged his fellow residents to become adherents of his new religion. Kretinism required only that one die in his name. While he preferred ritual suicide, he also accepted anyone who lost their life in Hallowmere regardless of the cause. Kretin named Tohbeh as his first worshipper after the man's body was obliterated by a creeper.
=Gallery=
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	kretin has entered Dragonhollow.<BR>Panda: Oh look.<BR>Kretin: dick dick dick dick cock<BR>Tox: wb kretin<BR>Kretin: dick dick dick dick cock EVERYBODY<BR>Tox: I can't disagree<BR>Kretin: gud<BR>kretin has left Dragonhollow.	
	—Kretin greets Dragonhollow 	—Kretin greets Dragonhollow
File:2021-01-31_13.04.52.png|Kretin's home in the Swamplands
File:2022-03-03_05.33.30.png|His watchtower near Jckfrbn Castle
File:2017-02-18_00.01.58.png|Leaping to his death in Hallowmere
Category:People
Category:Citizens
Category:Veterans
Category:Survivors
Category:Swamplands Residents
Category:Woodlands Residents
Category:Northlands Residents
Category:Summerlands Residents
Category:Badlands Residents
Category:Hallowmere Residents
Category:Enclave
Category:OFUC
Category:Cabbage
Category:Coliseum Champions