Squidward's Arson Attack

Squidward's Arson Attack is the season three premiere, and the forty-first episode overall of Welcome to Fancyland!. It was written by FireMatch and Existant202.
==Plot==
When Squidward has had enough of his neighbors disturbing his peace, he commits arson. 
==Synopsis==
The episode begins with Patrick repeatedly banging his head against the sand.
“I love you sand! I love you sand!”
“Patrick, what are you doing?” SpongeBob asks him.
“Some guy on TV told me that if I bashed my head in the sand, it would get into my pores and make me a genie!”
“Patrick, there’s no way that works.”
“Sure there is. Wish for anything you like.”
“Let’s see… a flying sea pig? Everybody knows pigs can’t fly.”
“Umm… I’ll try.” Patrick swiftly gets onto his phone and looks up a picture of a flying pig, which he shows to SpongeBob.
“Patrick, that’s a picture you pulled off of Google.”
“I know, right? Isn’t it great?!” Patrick then starts laughing like a weirdo.
Squidward is looking at this exchange from the very top of his island head house.
“What are those spam eaters up to this time?” he says out loud to himself.
“Spam eaters? That’s a new one,” Patrick says.
“AHHHHH!” Squidward screams. “Where the (dolphin chirp) did you come from?!”
“Uhh… the Internet?”
“Nice try, Patrick.”
“No really, I’m just a hologram on a server. SpongeBob taught me how to do it. Bye now!”
The hologram fades away as Squidward tries to strangle it.
“Why do I even bother… Maybe watching some good old fashioned TV will help calm my nerves.”
Squidward heads downstairs to the TV room and sits down on his brand new pink gold sofa.
“Hey, it's not girly if it's golden,” he says, and turns on the TV.
Squidward begins watching a police show on TV about firefighters. On the TV, a couple firefighters are stuck in a pile of rubble.
“Help us, Melissa!” the male firefighter shouts.
“I can’t, it’s against gender roles!” Melissa yells.
“NOOOOOO!”
Text on the screen then says, “Due to misogyny, neither of the firefighters were saved that day.”
“How pathetic. I don’t need to see this political malarkey on television,” Squidward complains.
After Squidward says that, a grumpy looking banana is seen through his window complaining about music, or something like that.
“Lunatic,” Squidward mumbles. “Maybe I should watch something else.”
Just before Squidward tries to change the channel, a lightbulb falls and breaks onto Squidward’s head.
“Ow! Good thing I have insurance.” Squidward picks up the lightbulb pieces and puts them in the trash. “More importantly, I have a delightfully devilish idea…”
Squidward’s eyes turn into flame as he laughs maniacally. The scene fades to SpongeBob eating his usual rich-people popcorn while watching a rich-people movie.
“Wow, who knew how much better Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy looked in 8K? I didn’t even know there were that many K’s to go around!” he says while still eating popcorn.
SpongeBob then starts smelling a fire-like substance.
“Hmm… I don’t remember starting any fires in the fire room. Wait, do I even have a fire room?”
SpongeBob then laughs off his concerns as he continues to watch the movie.
Outside SpongeBob’s house, it is revealed that Squidward has lit a match on the outer edge of the house. Slowly but surely, the fire starts to take over SpongeBob’s house.
“Two hours later…” the French Narrator says over a time card.
Cut back to the same shot of SpongeBob’s house, which is halfway on fire. Looking inside the TV room, however, it seems SpongeBob still has not noticed.
“Wow, the sequel looks even better than the first one!” he comments.
Squidward snickers as he watches SpongeBob be completely oblivious to the arson he has committed.
“Hold on a minute… why stop at just SpongeBob’s house? Why not just kill two fish with one stone and set fire to Patrick’s house too? Muahahaha!” Squidward laughs maniacally, and someone overhears his evil laughter.
“Mommy, I’m scarred for life,” the kid says.
“That’s fine dear,” the mom says, and grabs the kid along.
Squidward runs over to Patrick's house and lights it on fire.
"YEAH BABY THIS FEELS GREAT" Squidward says calmly. "I FEEL SO ALIVE!"
Squidward laughs maniacally as he watches both houses burn down.
Cut to inside Patrick's house, where Patrick is watching tv.
“Cool, Poop the Movie in 3-D! I’ve never had a 3-D TV before!” he says.
Then he sniffs the air around him, noticing something off.
“Why does it smell like smoke? Is my hot dog burrito ready?”
Patrick gets up from his sofa and sees that his house is on fire.
“AHHHH! MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE! ALL MY HARD WORK! MY ICE CREAM! MY PANTS! MY ICE CREAM! AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, RUGGIE!”
Cut to Patrick’s favorite rug, Ruggie, burning up in flames.
“NOOOOO!”
Immediately after screaming this, Patrick is engulfed in the flames and disappears.
Meanwhile, in SpongeBob’s house, SpongeBob is cooking more popcorn on the stove.
“Who needs a microwave when you have a stove that does all the hard work for you?” he says as robot hands do the stove work for him. He then finally notices the fire.
“Huh? Did I set something on fire again?”
Just as the popcorn is almost finished, the fire engulfs SpongeBob as well, making him disappear also. Cut back to Squidward, who is laughing even more maniacally before.
“MUAHAHAHAHAHA! My master plan is finally complete! I have committed… arson!” Squidward shouts in an insane manner.
As it turns out, a random teenager has been recording Squidward’s yelling this entire time.
“Brooooo, this’ll make me go VIRAL on FishTok!” the teen says excitedly.
“Wait, WHAT? I’m gonna get CANCELED if you post that!” Squidward yells, lunging at the teen.
“You realize I’m still recording, right?” the teen says.
Squidward stares for a second. “Fish paste.”
Bubble transition to the next day, the dawn of a new morning. Miraculously, SpongeBob and Patrick’s houses have been restored. Squidward wakes up, unusually happy.
“Ahh, a new day. And for once I’m looking forward to it!” he says, rushing to look outside at his destruction. However, his destruction has already been reversed. Squidward’s jaw reaches to the ground, literally.
“H-h-h-h-h-ow?!”
“Oh hey, Squidward!” SpongeBob greets him. “Liked our new holograms? They’re so cool and revolutionary, right?”
“Huh?”
“Oh, you didn’t know? Patrick and I decided to go to a Bubble Kings tournament yesterday, so we turned ourselves and our houses into holograms. It took a lot of work, but it was worth it seeing the look on your face!”
Patrick, now alongside SpongeBob, chuckles stupidly.
“It was the perfect prank!” he says.
Squidward’s eye rapidly twitches, and pops off of his face.
“That’s it, I’ve seen enough!” his right eye says as it packs a tiny suitcase full of its stuff, and leaves the scene.
The left eye simply just puts a sleeping mask on, snoring instantly.
“April Fools, Squidward!” SpongeBob and Patrick yell in unison.
SpongeBob and Patrick both laugh and go back to their houses, leaving Squidward alone. Squidward promptly takes out his brain and throws it at incoming traffic, making a lamborghini explode as a consequence. The episode ends with Squidward putting both his tentacles on his face, ashamed.
==Trivia==
*This is the first episode since FireMatch's claim of ownership to not be solo written by her.
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