Bunker Break-In/Transcript

The following is a transcript for the episode "Bunker Break-In".
== ==
(The camera shows a flag with a picture of Branch. It then zooms out to reveal him with Dennis, Fuzzbert, Satin, and Chenille.)
Branch: This game is ours, team. There’s no way Poppy’s getting our flag. (He laughs and Poppy appears while her hair is hanging onto something. Then she takes the flag and lands next to Branch.)
Poppy: Don’t worry, Branch. With a security expert like you as team captain, Poppy will never get that flag.
Branch: Ha! Truer words have never been spoken, Poppy. Hm? Poppy?!
Poppy: In the flesh, though not for long. (She runs off.)
Branch: Oh, not today! (He runs after Poppy. He tries to lunge at her, but she jumps in the air and uses her hair to get behind him and he falls on the ground with a faceplant.)
Poppy: Better luck next time, Branch! (She goes to her team and places Branch’s flag next to hers.) Victory! (Her teammates cheer as she performs a curtsy.)
DJ Suki: Yeah!
Guy Diamond: You’re amazing, Poppy! You simply can’t be defended!
Poppy: Oh, pfft. Well, I’m just here to have fun. (Branch walks up to her.)
Branch: Precisely! We were all just goofing off. This victory proves nothing about who can guard who.
Poppy: Uh… I didn’t say that, Branch. I mean, I did just beat you six rounds straight.
Branch: At a game, set in an open field! (We hear some birds chirping.)
Poppy: Sounds like someone feels defensive about his defenses.
Biggie, DJ Suki, and Smidge: Ooh!
Branch: Ha! If I used real security, you wouldn’t stand a chance.
Biggie, DJ Suki, and Smidge: Ooh!
Poppy: You got something in mind?
Branch: As a matter of fact, I do. (At his bunker, he tells his friends about a new game.) New game. I’ve placed my flag in the vault of my bunker. You have the day to retrieve it and get it outside. Unless, of course, you just want to surrender it now.
Poppy: Come on, Branch. Your bunker? We’ve snuck in there loads of times.
All: Mm-hm.
Cooper: I watched you sleep just last night! (His friends groan.)
Branch: (Taking out Gary) But that’s ‘cause ever since we befriended the Bergens, I’ve only had my security in Suspicious Loner mode. Today, I’ll be switching back to full-on Paranoid Hermit. (An alarm sounds out and many traps appear.)
Poppy: Big deal! Some extra traps?
Branch: Traps, alarms, sensors. And if you disturb any of them, the bunker goes on total lockdown. (He presses another button and lasers appear.)
Poppy: Pfft! Who cares? W-we’ll just turn off full lockdown. (chuckles sheepishly)
Branch: Oh, great idea! (He knocks on a wall and two keyholes appear.) All you need to pull that off is two custom-made keys… (He turns the two keys and the lasers disappear.) … which I keep on me at all times. (cackles)
Poppy: Grr! So? All we have to do is um… is um…
Branch: OK, when you figure out that snappy comeback, call me. I’ll be in my bunker, celebrating my inevitable victory. Ha! (He pulls a switch and he goes down into his bunker.)
Poppy: Grr! All right, gang! Who here cares deeply about Branch? (She and her friends raise one of their hands and grunt.) Right! Now, that said, who also wants to wipe that smug grin off his face? (They grunt and raise their other hands.) Good! (She takes out a scrapbook and scissors.) Then we need a plan. (She starts scrapbooking a plan.)
Smidge: What if we use the Evisceration Shaft? That’s worked before.
Poppy: Uh… I wouldn’t do that on account of the whole evisceration thing.
Guy Diamond: Ah, but didn’t Branch recently install a less lethal secret entrance… the Spaghetti Shaft?
Poppy: Won’t work. It’s an unsolvable maze that only Branch knows how to get through.
Guy Diamond: This way! No, this way!
Poppy: You literally wouldn’t know if you were coming or going.
Guy Diamond: Aah! Both ways!
Poppy: Face it, guys. There’s only one way into that bunker. Branch is gonna have to let us in. (Soon, Branch reads a letter.)
Branch: “Please take me inside. I have no home. And I’m just a baby”? (He sees Smidge dressed as a baby.) Seriously, Smidge? This is your plan?
Smidge: No, Smidgey. I baby. (She jumps onto Branch.) Dada!
Branch: Ew!
Smidge: Dada!
Branch: Stop!
Smidge: Dada!
Branch: This is so profoundly creepy!
Smidge: Dada, take baby inside.
Branch: Fine! (He drops Smidge.) You want to come inside? (He presses a button and a cage traps Smidge.)
Smidge: Oh, my Guh! (She covers her mouth.) Uh… I mean, oh, my goo-goo-guh-guh. (Branch presses another button and Smidge screams as the cage she is in brings her down fast. Poppy, DJ Suki, Cooper, Guy Diamond, and Biggie look through the bushes.)
Poppy: Hm. Might need a better disguise. (Branch is with Peppy.)
Branch: OK, what’s the emergency again?
Peppy: Oh, it’s an epidemic! Trolls across the village are reporting their piñatas are filled with… (gasps) … vegetables! You must let me inside to inspect yours right away!
Branch: Really? King Peppy needs to come inside my bunker today to do something literally any other Troll could do?
Peppy: Well, I don’t know if I like your tone. Actually, I do. So velvety. But I assure you, I am King Peppy.
Branch: Fine. Then what did you tell me the time we went fishing together? Uh… Well, I said… “Branch, I know you feel misunderstood sometimes, but the Trolls, they need you. They may not admit it. Heck, they may not even be aware of it. But they need you… son.” (Branch’s eyes shine for a moment and he becomes serious.)
Branch: We’ve never been fishing. (He removes Peppy’s head and we see that it was actually DJ Suki in disguise.)
DJ Suki: (grunts) Oh, no! (Branch traps her in a cage and sends her down.) WHOOOOOAAAAAA!!!
Poppy: Maybe we’ve got to try something less… complicated.
Branch: OK, this is just pathetic.
Cooper: I’m serious, Branch! Look behind you!
Branch: Oh, sure. Let me look so you can sneak in while my back is turned.
Cooper: Branch, I’m 100 percent serious! Look!
Branch: (As Mr. Dinkles appear behind him while wearing sunglasses) Not happening!
Cooper: Oh, for real! You got to look right now! (Mr. Dinkles jumps into the door to Branch’s bunker.)
Branch: Enough! (He traps Cooper in a cage and he laughs as he goes down.) Three teammates down, Poppy! Face it, you are never getting in! (He goes inside his bunker.)
Poppy: Now! (The door opens and Mr. Dinkles reappears.)
Mr. Dinkles: Meep.
Poppy: We’re in. (Inside Branch’s bunker, he is blowing balloons. He ties some around Cooper’s hands. We see that he, Smidge, and DJ Suki have their hands and legs tied up in balloons.)
Branch: It’s only a matter of time. But Poppy isn’t going to surrender easily. (Poppy, Biggie, and Guy Diamond sneak past him from behind.) So, get comfortable.
Smidge: Oh, we will. (Poppy, Biggie, and Guy Diamond reach the vault and gasp.)
Guy Diamond: The vault!
Poppy: And it only opens with an access code. You think you can crack it? (Biggie goes over to a red button.)
Biggie: Hm? (He presses the red button and a keypad appears along with a screen with a hand on it.) Hm. I’ll need the right tool. (He takes tool box out of his hair. He digs in it and finds a screwdriver.) Nope. (He finds a wrench.) Nope. (He takes out a little sheet of paper.) Bingo. (We see a picture of him and Mr. Dinkles. He then starts crying.) So adorable! (His tears fall onto the machine, making it break and the vault door opens.) Checkmate. (Inside, he, Poppy, and Guy Diamond see that Branch’s flag is in glass with lasers.) 
Poppy: (grunts) Indestructible glass.
Guy Diamond: We’ll see about that. They don’t call me Guy Diamond for nothing. (Closeup of Guy's bottom. It forms pointy parts and he scrapes it on the glass in a circle. Then he removes the piece with his hair.) You’re up, Poppy. (Poppy takes a deep breath and grabs the flag with her hair while avoiding the lasers.)
Guy Diamond: Yeah!
Poppy and Biggie: Yeah! (Poppy tries to get the flag out.)
Poppy: We can’t pull it out without tripping the alarm. (The camera cuts to Branch watching Cooper, Smidge, and DJ Suki having a snack. Cooper is eating cookies, Smidge is having a drink, and DJ Suki is having pocorn.)
Branch’s Voice: Security breach! Bunker entering full system lockdown!
Branch: (gasps) The flag! Huh? (He sees Poppy, Guy Diamond, and Biggie sneaking away with his flag.) Poppy? (Poppy, Guy Diamond, and Biggie laugh and run away.) You’ll never get out on full lockdown! (Just before Poppy and her friends escape, some bars trap them.)
Poppy: Uh… W-wrong! We’ve still got one chance. To the Spaghetti shaft! (She, Guy Diamond, and Biggie run to a little door and she starts to open it.)
Branch: You want to escape into an indecipherable labyrinth that only I know how to navigate?
Poppy: I didn’t say it was a good chance! (She opens the little door.) Go, go, go! (Biggie screams as he, Guy Diamond, and Poppy jump through the door.)
Branch: (chuckles) You’re in my world now. (He jumps in after his friends. They soon reach a dead end.)
Biggie: Oh, dead end! (He, Poppy, and Guy Diamond continue running.)
Poppy, Biggie, and Guy Diamond: A deader end! (They scream as the continue running. They split up and bump into each other.) HOW DO WE GET OUT OF HERE?! (A trapdoor opens underneath them and they fall. They land on top of each other. Poppy gets out from under Biggie and sees Branch.)
Branch: It’s over. (Poppy sighs and shows him the flag. Then he shows them the way out.) And the Spaghetti Shaft exit leads here. (The exit door opens and the friends get out.) Poppy, Poppy, Poppy. I told you, my defenses can’t be beaten. (Poppy, Biggie, and Guy Diamond laugh.)
Poppy: Can’t they, Branch? Can’t they?
Branch: No. I still have my flag.
Poppy: Do you, Branch? Do you?
Branch: Will you stop answering me rhetorically? And yes, it’s right here. (He looks at his flag.) What? (We see that it is Poppy’s flag.) It’s the wrong flag? But why would you carry the wrong flag?
Poppy: Because the right flag was simply too well-guarded. Even before we snuck in, we knew that we could never get it without tripping an alarm. (We go to the past where she replaces Branch’s flag with hers.) So we tripped it on purpose.)
Past Poppy, Go, go, go! (She leaves Branch’s flag behind and she runs away with Guy Diamond and Biggie. Then we go back to the present.)
Branch: So, what? You left the real flag inside on full lockdown? Who cares? You still lose.
Poppy: Not if we have two special keys. (We go to the past again where Smidge is jumping up on Branch.)
Past Smidge: Dada! 
Poppy: One in one pocket… (We go to where DJ Suki is with Branch.) … and one in the other. (DJ Suki’s hand sticks out and she gets the other key. We go back to the present again.)
Branch: B-but it still doesn’t matter. The flag can’t walk itself outside. You’re all here, and I captured Smidge, DJ, and Cooper!
Poppy: Really? Did you capture Cooper? (We go inside Branch’s bunker where DJ Suki and Smidge take out the keys.) Or did you capture someone else? (Harper, a purple female Troll, and a purple female Glitter Troll come out of a costume that looks like Cooper.) Someone who’s grabbing the real flag as we speak. (Harper takes the keys and takes Branch’s flag.)
Branch: No! There’s no way! You couldn’t have! (Harper knocks on the wall and a number sign appears.)
Poppy: Oh, but we did, Branch. (Harper turns the keys and the traps disappear. She then comes out with DJ Suki, Smidge, the purple female Troll, and the purple female Glitter Troll.) Booyah!
Branch: But… but that doesn’t… I…
Poppy: Ha-ha. OK. When you figure out that snappy comeback, call us. We’ll be here celebrating our actual victory. (She and the others cheer while Branch grunts.)
Branch: Actually, that was pretty good.
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