The Critic/Bums A Glory Transcript

[the episode starts off with the Animaniacs Special presentation then cuts to black with title cards saying dedicated to our friends at channel awesome]
[the Warners are shown on camera]
YAKKO AND WAKKO: Hi were the Warner Brothers!
DOT: And the Warner sister.
YAKKO: And we'd like you to invite you and all the members of the household
DOT: to gather around the TV set and join us now
YAKKO: for a very special episode of Animaniacs!
DOT: and what's so special about it?
WAKKO: I'm not wearing any pants!
Fade to Black and the theme starts then first cartoon starts]
THE CRITIC
the episode starts with the Warner bros studio and cuts to Mr. Plotz talking to Scratchensniff
Mr.Plotz: Dr.Scratchensniff we have ourselves a big problem that is driving me crazy!
Dr.scratchensniff: Hollywood's running out of ideas and creating reboots?
MR.PLOTZ: no not that something that can affect our studio forever!
DR.SCRATCHENSNIFF
Mel Gibson retiring?
MR.PLOTZ: [angry] NO!
(Mr. Plotz turns on the TV and shows the Critic)
THE CRITIC: (holds a Warner Bros DVD)I hate to be the idiots who made this sequel!
MR.PLOTZ: That person is making a fool out of our movies I payed thousands of dollars to approve the studios movies and he just sits there mocking them and saying they're awful!
while Plotz is talking numerous clips of the Critic laughing and ranting about movies
DR.SCRATCHENSNIFF: So what? he's just one of those critics who has es own opinions.
MR.PLOTZ: (gets a hold of Scrachensniff) You don't get it Scratchy! If people find out that our movies are horrible No money means no studio means no Warner Bros!
(Mr.Plotz turns off the TV)
MR.PLOTZ: [CONT] (Pacing the floor) I have to stop that critic before people realize that Warner Bros is just garbage! I need someone who is crazy and stupid enough to let that critic know who's boss!
MR.PLOTZ[CONT]: I need!
(the door bursts open and the Warners come in wearing the Men in Black suits)
YAKKO: Did someone call for the Warners in Black? We are here to help! Agent Y leader
WAKKO: Agent W sibling Assistant!
DOT: and I am Agent Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca III or just Agent D!
(Yakko Wakko and Dot remove the Men in Black suits and give it to Agent J!)
YAKKO: hey thanks for letting us lend these suits from the MIB Mr.J
Agent J: hey no problem kids call me if you want to get Jiggy sometime in the MIB
(Agent J runs off screen)
DOT: that catchphrase will never catch on for long!
YAKKO: Goodnight Everybody!
MR.PLOTZ: Cease this horseplay you three!
YAKKO: Horseplay? I didn't even know you had horses Mr.Plotz!
MR.PLOTZ: Just sit down.
(Yakko Wakko and Dot sit in the chairs)
MR.PLOTZ: Warners we have a problem that could affect our studio
YAKKO
Bill Cosby is behind bars?
MR.PLOTZ
Actually thats a good thing...But No a certain critic has been demolishing the studios films and I want you three to take him down.
Yakko Wakko and Dot: (OS) All done!
(Yakko Wakko and Dot enter holding Jay Sherman)
MR.PLOTZ: Who is that?
WAKKO: It's the Critic you asked for!
JAY SHERMAN: Um...can someone get me down from these....weirdos?
MR.PLOTZ: No No not that critic!
(Yakko and Wakko throw Jay Sherman out)
DOT: Oh don't worry his career was 3 seasons old anyways!
(Plotz brings up a picture of the Critic wearing a black jacket,and glasses)
MR.PLOTZ: This man has been tearing through this studios movies and burning them to a crisp!
YAKKO: oh you mean saying awful things about the flaws and making fun of them?
MR.PLOTZ[CONT]: No he's literally tearing them and burning them to a crisp!
(a picture of the critic is shown with a flamethrower)
MR.PLOTZ: Your mission is to take down that critic before people think we're a joke
YAKKO: Really I thought you guys were a joke?
MR.PLOTZ: Since when?
DOT: Since you hired Joel Schumacher to direct the other two Batman films.
Fade to black
Fade in
(The Critic is shown writing jokes and critiques for his review.)
The Critic: Hmmm i need to find perfect jokes for this review. But I just can't think of the right jokes .Hmmm
Large Knock on the door is heard
The Critic: Go Away I'm busy!!
Large knock happens again
The Critic (Sighs then gets up from his chair and goes to answer the door.): This better be good I haven't had a day like this since Mr.Magoo whooped me in karate.
(He answers the door but nobodies there)
The Critic: Hello? Hello? Kids these days
(He slams the door and goes to sit down)