(Not) A Random Video

==Transcript==
The Oxford English Dictionary is a fucking joke. It describes itself as "the definitive record of the English language", but it's essentially the definitive record of how droolers and the uneducated abuse the English language. After I posted my video titled "The Literal Butchering of the English Language", where I chastised the OED staff for including the definition that literal can also just be an exaggeration or mean the exact opposite of itself, I received more than a few comments and emails and whatnot where people defended its inclusion. "Buckley, language evolves, it's not static. We come up with new words and definitions all the time." Sure, I agree. That should happen, when it's necessary, but not for the sake of pandering to the lowest common denominator.
A word that gets misused all the time, and I'll admit, I was guilty of this when I was young and stupid, is the word "random". The word "random" refers to a method of choosing something without making any specific decisions of your own. Putting the names of your favourite restaurants in a hat and blindly choosing to eat at, for example. The lottery, the numbers are chosen at random. No one says, "Alright, we're gonna pick 4, 15, 22, 36, 38, and 50 this week." They're drawn at random. Here are some things it does not refer to.
It does not refer to things that fucking happened to you during the day that were weird or inconvenient. "Man, it was so random! The bus broke down on my way to school!" That's not random, that's just an unfortunate occurrence. The bus doesn't have a random number generator in its engine that demonstrates whether or not it will run. It broke down because of any number of factors, including wear and tear, poor maintenance, or a manufacturer's defect, and that event happening wasn't randomly generated. It's not a higher being flipping a coin to determine whether or not to fuck with your day.
It doesn't refer to a seemingly mismatched collection of items. "Man, Buckley's videos are so random!" No, they aren't. I determine the topic every week based on events that happened to myself or that are relatively newsworthy, or I decide to do a feature like Advice No One Asked For or Musical Autopsy. A fully conscious decision is made. There's absolutely nothing random about it, and to a similar point, you cannot be random. "I like football and Pokémon. I play video games and the guitar. I'm so random!" You could be described as quirky, weird or someone who has diverse interests, but you're not random, unless you have such a lack of personality that you just spin a wheel with different hobbies on it and whatever it lands on, that's what you decide you like, but even then, you're not random. The way you choose interests in random.
And even then, other people are not random. "Man, like, this random guy came up to me at the bar last night and hit on me!" Once again, choice plays into this. Maybe not necessarily for you, say, you're a girl and a stranger comes up to you at a club and asks you to buy a drink. There's nothing random about this encounter. A: You're at a bar, that's what happens at bars. B: You and that guy both likely chose to be at that bar. It's coincidental, but not random. C: The guy did not choose you at random. He saw that you happened to be standing near the bar, or he thought you were attractive, and he made a decision to approach you. He likely didn't close his eyes, spin around in a circle with his arm pointing forward, and then stop and say, "Whoever I'm pointing at when I open my eyes, that's who I'll try and fuck tonight!" Even if that happened, that makes you the random one! He's not random. "Samantha's such a slut! She's fucked so many randoms!" Is she literally flipping the pages in a phonebook, closing her eyes and pointing at phone numbers, calling those men and asking them to fuck? No? That's stupid, you say? She's just going home with the first attractive man who hits on her, or if it's getting late, the first man in general? Then there's nothing random about that either!
Random is not synonymous with strange, weird, odd or unexpected. At least it wasn't, until the Oxford English Dictionary decided to dumb down their so-called "definitive record of the English language". "Why say, well, this is how morons use it, so I guess we'll add it in here." That's ridiculous! The OED is published by Oxford University, one of the most prestigious post-secondary institutions in the world, or at least I thought it was. Have they also lowered their standards? "Well, this guy spelled his name wrong on the application form. He drooled all over himself in the interview and he got distracted by a bird, but so did 200 other applicants, so as long as this check clears, let him in."
So, I no longer recognize the Oxford English Dictionary. It is, to me, on the same level as Urban Dictionary. Two wrongs don't make a right, nor do two million wrongs. We should not be making concessions for morons, or dumbing things down because people are stupid or lazy, because it's a vicious cycle. That's why people are stupid and lazy, because they're allowed to get away with it! Stupidity breeds stupidity, laziness breeds laziness, and the Oxford English Dictionary is just one of many publications and organizations enabling it. Can Oxford fix it all? No. Well, they don't have to be part of the problem. Just because the Ganges River has a lot of shit in it, doesn't mean you should also go take a shit in it! By the way, that's an analogy I consciously decided to use, it's not a random statement.
I can't tell you to stop being fucking idiots, but please. Just try and not be a fucking idiot all the time? I know, it's hard, but just try. If not for me, if not for the rest of society. For yourself.