The Shopping Mall (Life Of A Sponge Transcript)

== SpongeBob And Patrick Mess About On The Lift. ==
(SpongeBob and Patrick walk inside the Shopping Mall)
SpongeBob: Wow this is extremely big.....
Patrick: I know. (They stop at a giant lift) Woah!. What is this thing?.
SpongeBob: I don't know. Looks like some teleporter or something. Let's try it out. (They walk inside the lift) 1, 2, 3, 4?. What do those mean?. Oh well. I'll make a lucky guess. (He presses 2. The lift goes up) Hang on how come we haven't teleported?
Patrick: Maybe it's not a teleporter?. It could be something else......Maybe it's a fairground ride. Weeeeee!
SpongeBob: You might be right. Weeeee!!! (The lift stops and the doors open) Oh the rides over..... Never mind we can ride it again. Weeeeeeeeeee! (He presses number 1 and the lift goes down) Hahaha that was fun.
Patrick: Again!. (They go up then down like they did last time but the door wont open)
SpongeBob: Huh?. Were locked in?. (SpongeBob cries) Help! Help!!.
Patrick: Help!!!! (A guy walks into the lift)
Guy: What is your problem!?. You guys are creeping me out. 
SpongeBob: (Sniffs) The door won't open.
Guy: Then why is it open now!.
SpongeBob: Oh......... Look my mother told me not to talk to strangers.....so...bye!
(SpongeBob and Patrick run off)
Guy: Weirdos.
== Squidward Files A Complaint ==
(Squidward is browsing through the mall
Squidward: If i remember correctly it's this one.......
(Squidward walks to the counter of a clothes shop)
Squidward: Are you the manager!?.
Manager: Why yes sir i am. How can i help you?
Squidward: Well for starts you can help me!. look at this shirt!. It's covered in filth!!. and just look at the creases!!. There is also a tear in the collar, a smudge on the bottom and their's blood on the middle!!!!!!. Also you charged me 10 bucks when the shirt was only $5!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Don't even get me started on the fact there a dog a peed on i!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!t. There is so many things i could be here for ages!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. And not to mention the most important!!!!!!!!. The customer service here is terrible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And it reeks in here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Not to...................
(He notices the manager has fallen asleep. The manager wakes up sudden)
Manager: Oh sorry to keep you waiting good sir. Now what do you want?.
(Squidward slaps the manager in the face and walks off)
== Mr. Krabs Is Accused Of Shoplifting ==
(Mr Krabs is whistling to the exit of the mall to put his stuff in his boat. An alarm sounds when he goes past)
Officer: Great just what we need. More crime! (The officer grabs Mr Krabs before he reaches his car) I think we need to chat.
Mr Krabs: Excuse me officer but is their a problem?.
Officer: (While handcuffing Mr Krabs) Yes their is. All of the stuff in your hand has been stolen!. You have shoplifted!.
Mr Krabs: Wait a sec. (He grabs a bag of marbles) You lost these.
Officer: Why thank you very much.....(He notices something) Hey!. Don't pull that one on me now!. Come with me.
Mr Krabs: Why?. Did you forget the other bag?.
Officer: You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do will be tried in the courtroom.
Mr Krabs: First though i need you to read something. (He shows the receipt he got with the stuff he has) 
Officer: (Reading) Oh dear i am so very sorry sir. I had no idea. I thought....
(The manager interrupts him)
Manager: Ehem!. Into my office. NOW!
Officer: (Upset) Yes sir.
== Mr. Krabs Opens A New Shop ==
(SpongeBob walks into a shop)
SpongeBob: Wow... This shop is HUGE! (he bumps into Mr. Krabs)
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBoy me Bob! Yeah, The Krusty Krab wasn't getting as much money. So Squidward turned it into an Art Musuem.
SpongeBob: So, what does that have to do with me?
Mr. Krabs: JUST GET BEHIND THE TILL!
SpongeBob: The grill?
Mr. Krabs: THE TILL! (Plankton walks in)
Plankton: Look, I'd love to help but I'm busy. (he walks off screen then walks back on holding a hat and a shirt with Krabby Patties) See? I am busy! Why steal the formula when I have already have the McDonalds' fries formula. Plus, CAN'T YOU SEE I'M NAKED?
SpongeBob: So, you're one hundred percent sure it is the till? Because I'm sure it's the- SHOPLIFTER! (scene shows Plankton at the counter)
Squidward: That will be one dollar, madam.
== SpongeBob Spends Too Much Money ==
(SpongeBob walks into Dollar World, a shop in the mall)
SpongeBob: Wow! Look at all these items! I will treasure them forever! (he walks over to the counter with a bunch of stuff in a bag) How many dollars will this be?
Patrick: Ummm... Ummm.... 24? (laughter is heard in the backround) Oh, my mistake. 25. (more laughter is heard) Come on! What if I say 26? (more laughter is heard) Screw you! Your bigger idiots than me! (even more laughter is heard)
(SpongeBob walks into Toys R Us, another shop in the mall)
SpongeBob: Look! Fan Products! Whats this? (he picks up a toy pony) Press button to play music. OK!
Music: Pony.....
SpongeBob: (a long pause) I'll show this to Gary! (he walks up to the counter)
Fish: That's One million hundred and ninety nine dollars, Talking Cheese!
SpongeBob: (he puts his hand in his left pocket) Nope, maybe old righty. (he puts his hand in his right pocket) No! My hole! (He puts his hand in one of his holes. Then another, and another and another. One the tenth try he stops) I'm....... broke? (he gets kicked out of the mall) Well that was a harsh way to end the episode.
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