Spinning Off

This is the first episode of Into the Spongyverse.
==Transcript==
Narrator: Ah, the Spongyverse. A universe that didn’t get created overnight. Well, actually, it did. It’s a very long story. Grab your urchin-flavored popcorn, and tune into the origins of… the Spongyverse.
(The series title shows up on screen, and it pans downward towards the SpongeBob SquarePants logo)
Narrator: The original series, SpongeBob SquarePants, is one that we all remember. We grew up with it, and still do. Let’s see what SpongeBob was up to at the time.
(SpongeBob is pouring a bowl of Kelpo cereal)
SpongeBob: Isn’t this great, Gary? All those petitions actually worked! I guess crying does solve your problems after all.
Gary: Meow.
SpongeBob: (laughs) You’re a card, Gary, you really are.
Gary: Meow… (slithers away in frustration)
SpongeBob: Huh, wonder what’s up with him. Time to dig in!
(SpongeBob starts eating some cereal when he hears a whirring sound outside)
SpongeBob: Huh? (shrugs) Must be the wind.
(Outside, a giant rip is visible in the sky, and slowly grows larger and larger)
Narrator: Ah, and this was just one of the three universes that got merged into the Spongyverse. Let’s take a look at the first SpongeBob spin-off, shall we?
(The camera fades to a CGI animated world, where a younger version of SpongeBob is playing with a younger version of Patrick)
Young SpongeBob: Tag, you’re it!
Young Patrick: AHH! Oh, hey SpongeBob.
Young SpongeBob: Did you forget that we were playing tag?
Young Patrick: How long ago was that?
Young SpongeBob: Right now. Can’t catch me!
Young Patrick: Oh you little rascal, come over here!
Counselor Squidward: (popping his head out from the cabin door) Can you two be quiet for once? I can’t even hear myself hear myself think!
Young SpongeBob: Yikes, he said hear myself twice. We should listen to him.
Young Patrick: Yeah, whistle to him!
Counselor Squidward: No no no wait-!
(Patrick gives out a loud whistle; Squidward covers his ears, and a taxi shows up)
Taxi: You again, eh? Quit wastin’ my time! (drives off)
Narrator: The first spin-off series of SpongeBob, Kamp Koral, takes place in some weird alternate universe where SpongeBob and Sandy met at summer camp, which is run by Mr. Krabs.
Camp Counselor Krabs: (putting his claw up to his nonexistent ear) Do I hear something?
Harvey: You do hear something. IT’S THE LIZARD PEOPLE!
Perch Perkins: Harvey, can you stop? This is the ninth conspiracy theory you’ve fallen for this week.
Harvey: Can’t you see, Perch? They’re all true! How come nobody’s panicking?!
Perch Perkins: Because you have the brain capacity of a pinecone.
Harvey: No I don’t! (reaches inside his head to pull out a pinecone) Okay I guess you do have a point.
Narrator: Ugh, these idiots. Oh, here comes the rift!
(A rift starts to appear directly above Larry’s cabin)
Larry: Is it just me or is there a draft in here? (puts on a coat) Yeesh, it’s real bad.
Random camper: (doing push-ups while shivering) Does Neptune not like us anymore?
Larry: Considering what’s been occurring lately, probably.
Narrator: Let’s move on to The Patrick Star Show, shall we?
(Fade to a teapot-shaped home in the middle of a wacky-looking city)
Narrator: The latest spin-off (as of right now), The Patrick Star Show, is a wacky one. It’s like if you smoked seaweed but you actually didn’t smoke seaweed. Not like that stuff’s legal in Bikini Bottom anyway.
Squidward: (banging on the Star house’s door) Hello?! You owe me three bucks from the past month! Three bucks will be a lot in ten years, you know!
(Bunny Star opens the door to see who’s outside)
Bunny: Why, it’s the noisy squid that comes every month to disturb us! How are you?
Squidward: I would be fine IF YOU GAVE ME THREE BUCKS!
Bunny: You’re so funny, we don’t run a charity here. Goodbye! (shuts the door)
Squidward: (steams like a teapot) I WILL PUT YOUR MICROSCOPIC BRAIN INTO A MICROWAVE AND EAT IT IF YOU DON’T GIVE ME RESTITUTION!
Patrick: (quickly opening the door) Did somebody say eat?!
Cecil Star: Now now, Patrick, let’s not get too hungry over there. It’s dinner time, and we cooked up your favorite: newspaper strips!
Patrick: Oh yum, dead trees! (slams the door shut, injuring Squidward)
Squidward: Medic… 
(Squidward then notices a rip in the sky)
Squidward: Hey, that cloud’s getting bigger by the second… could it be? ALIENS?! (screams, then runs off-screen)
Narrator: Well that was quite the scene. Now is where the real story comes in.
(The rift then opens, sucking everything below into it)
Squidward: No… NO NO NO NO! PLEASE! NOT ME! NOT MEEEE! (gets sucked in)
Bunny: Hey why do I feel a sudden draft? (her dress gets sucked into the rift) Oh! (covers up with a blanket, but that gets sucked in too) What kind of wind is this?!
Cecil: We must have disturbed the wind gods. I’m gonna go make them a sandwich.
(The entire Star house lifts up from the ground towards the rift)
Cecil: Uh-oh…
(Meanwhile, in SpongeBob SquarePants’ universe…)
(SpongeBob looks up into the sky to see random things start falling down onto him)
SpongeBob: Huh. Must be a reverse Bikini Bottom Triangle.
(TPSS Patrick lands right on top of him)
SpongeBob: Patrick?
TPSS Patrick: SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: Why do you have a shirt on?
TPSS Patrick: What happened to your hair?
SpongeBob: You’re funny, I never had any hair.
TPSS Patrick: I fell from the sky!
SpongeBob: I can tell.
(Kamp Koral SpongeBob then falls out of the sky)
Young SpongeBob: Wait… where am I?
SpongeBob: AHH! 3D!
Young SpongeBob: AHH! TRADITIONAL ANIMATION!
TPSS Patrick: AHH! What are we yelling for?
Bunny: I dunno, but I think we should get out of this random town. I don’t like it here.
TPSS Patrick: Mom! You’re here!
Bunny: I’m always here for you, Patrick. Now, I have no idea where your father is.
Squidward: For the last time, I said get OUT!
(Cecil gets literally kicked out of Squidward’s house)
Bunny: That guy sounds familiar.
Cecil: (cleaning himself up) That’s what I thought too.
SpongeBob: It seems you guys have come from alternate universes or something.
Young SpongeBob: Yeah. Where’s Narlene and Nobby?
SpongeBob: Who?
(Nobby drills out of the sand)
Nobby: DSJFLKDSJFLSJDLFSDJFSLKJFKLDSLKFSDFLKSDJFLKSLKFJKF
Narlene: Now, Nobby, what did I say about talking like spamming on a keyboard?
Nobby: Oh right, sorry.
SpongeBob: Oh, so those are Narlene and Nobby.
Young SpongeBob: You look like me but older. You sure you don’t know these guys?
SpongeBob: Alternate universes, remember?
Young SpongeBob: Oh, right.
(The original Patrick opens up his rock and jumps out of it, only to see the chaos unfolding)
Patrick: WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!
TPSS Patrick: Oh, so you don’t wear a shirt. That explains it.
Young SpongeBob: I have my own Patrick too. He’s around here somewhere.
Young Patrick: Hey SpongeBob, there’s this really cool place just over there! (points to the right, burps) They have these things called Krabby Patties!
Young SpongeBob: I hope it’s better than the slop Plankton gives us at camp.
Young Patrick: Oh, it is! I ate 345 of those things in one sitting!
Young SpongeBob: That can’t be healthy.
Patrick: Trust me, it is. Really trains your stomach. (his stomach churns) Speaking of… I gotta use the can! (he rushes into SpongeBob’s house to use his restroom)
SpongeBob: (sigh) Never change, Patrick.
Counselor Squidward: (hitting the ground) Ow, my head… (gets up) What the-?! (imaginary dotted lines from his eyes connect to all the different SpongeBobs and Patricks) I think I’m gonna have a stroke… (faints)
TPSS Patrick: Man down, man down!
Patrick: (cracks knuckles) Don’t worry, I’ve done this before.
(Patrick starts giving CPR to Counselor Squidward)
Bunny: So, umm… what are we going to do now?
(The rift up in the sky starts closing)
TPSS Squidward: (points) Look! Up in the sky! The rift thing is disappearing!
Cecil: Is that the thing that got us here?
TPSS Squidward: Yes! And it’s gonna close in a few… (the portal quickly closes completely) minutes. Well that was unexpected.
Squidward: Did you really expect to actually be able to reach that?
TPSS Squidward: Point taken.
(Patrick’s CPR starts taking effect, and Counselor Squidward is revived)
Counselor Squidward: Mommy?
(He then realizes that Patrick revived him with CPR, and starts wiping his tongue on the sand below)
SpongeBob: So… now that the portal thing is closed, I guess all we can do is just live together.
All three Squidwards: NOOOOOOO!
(All three Patricks are picking their noses)
Patrick: Huh. Guess we aren’t too different after all.
TPSS Squidward: That’s nasty.
(Gary slithers out of SpongeBob’s pineapple and meows)
SpongeBob: Gary, you have to see this!
Young SpongeBob: You really are the older version of me! You even have Gary as a pet now!
SpongeBob: Well yeah. Wanna meet him?
Gary: Meow?
(Kamp Koral Gary pushes Young SpongeBob’s hat to the ground and slithers towards Gary)
Young Gary: Meow?
Gary: Meow?
Squidward: Oh, hurry it up already, I’m tired of this nonsense.
Counselor Squidward: Wait a second. There’s three of us. We could actually… do stuff together!
TPSS Squidward: Huh, I never thought of that.
Squidward: Party at my house!
(The three Squidwards cheer as they enter his house. Bad clarinet music is soon heard)
Young Patrick: Hey older looking me, where do you live?
Patrick: (points to his rock) Right over there.
Young Patrick: Awesome! Let’s go do stuff there!
TPSS Patrick: (shrugs) Eh, why not? What’s up with us and living in objects?
(Suddenly, the Star house falls down right next to Patrick’s rock)
TPSS Patrick: My house! Hooray!
Patrick: Yeah, but at least it’s better than living with my parents.
TPSS Patrick: Well, uh… let’s just go.
(Patrick and Young Patrick hop into Patrick’s rock, and the Star family enter their house)
Young SpongeBob: I think I know what we should do now.
TPSS SpongeBob: Yeah.
(The SpongeBobs enter SpongeBob’s pineapple)
Narrator: Ah, and with that, that is the beginning of a long journey. How long this journey will be, I have no idea, but all we can do is wait to see what happens.
(The camera turns around to show a close-up of Fentin’s face)
Fentin Finkle: Muahahaha! With this brand new HD camera, I can film episodes of the Crabina Show with ease!
Narrator: Hey, we paid good money for that camera!
Fentin Finkle: Well you can put that money up your-
(Static is shown as the episode abruptly ends)
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