Obscura

Addie looked in the mirror. Her reflection seemed fractured and abnormal. She often thought about how misplaced she was in this world, but staring into those familiar blue/grey eyes, she realized how truly odd she was. Her straight, medium, auburn hair fell perfectly into place as she checked her appearance one last time. The last time she would ever stand before that mirror, before they moved. She pulled her navy blue jacket on over her black shirt that went perfectly with her light blue skinny jeans and jet black boots. From the first look you could tell she was not the typical twelve year old. She was the type of girl who sat eerily in the back of the classroom and would twitch nervously as you walked by. She walked out the door, grabbing the last remaining item in her room. Her beloved sketchbook. 
It was the only way she could express her feelings as well as cope with her depressed, abusive father. Two years ago, her mother had died of cancer not even a month later, her brother Robbie killed himself by an overdose. She couldn't understand how all these bad things could happen at once or why. She tried not to think about it as she stepped into the car. She slid into the passenger seat reluctantly. She didn't want to move but she didn't have a choice. She never did. Her father said it was for the best.
A new beginning. But really, what did he know? She thought he probably only wanted to move because her teachers started getting suspicious when she would come in to school with a black eye and busted lip. She always had a backup story. For the most part generic things like I fell on the stairs, or I ran into a door. Nobody really thought much of it. 
Her father closed the door as he slid the key into the ignition. Addie watched as her old house, her past life, fell behind them just as every other house. She didn't talk. Just stared out the window. 
By the time they reached the new house Addie was fast asleep and had been for a short while. Her left eye twitched as it always did, even in her sleep. She awoke to the sound of gravel under the tires of the car as it abruptly stopped. She stepped out of the car to see a decent looking, one story house that was set a little ways back in the woods. If she'd have known she would be moving into a place with woods, she would have been more willing to come in the first place.
Addie liked the woods. The woods left her alone with her thoughts. She walked up to the door and waited while her father fumbled with the keys for a minute. Once he finally unlocked the door they walked in and she looked around a bit. She liked most new things. And so far moving wasn't as bad as she thought it would be.
They stayed in a hotel a little bit away until a few days later when everything would finally be ready for them to live at the new house. She looked into the hotel bathroom mirror. Her left eye twitching as usual. Her father was an alcoholic and often she found herself alone while he was out drinking. Tonight he had came back irritated about something that had happened while he was out. He took his anger out on her like he did most of the time. 
This night was worse than usual. Her very pale, almost white complexion, was red with anger. She couldn't take it any longer. What was she to do? She had heard of people hurting themselves to take away the pain of reality, but had never really inflicted self-harm before. I mean, yes, the thought had crossed her mind, but she never really was into that stuff. She was willing to do anything now to take her mind away from the pain she was forced to deal with every day though. She stared at the dark rings around her eyes and suddenly had an idea. She pulled out a needle and thread from her backpack. She started sewing one vertical line under each eye as if they were tears. They trailed down her face. Blood dripping here and there and Addie loving the pain. Every second of it.
Her lust for blood now consuming her sanity. She had an urgent need to kill. She had never felt anything quite like it. It was so exhilarating. So obscure. She couldn't deal with this flurry of emotions any longer. She needed rest so that's just what she did. The next day upon waking up she felt light-headed and dizzy. As she walked out of the hotel room she was staying in she couldn't help but smile as she walked past the mirror. After breakfast they packed their things, and checked out of the hotel. The house was now fit and ready to be lived in. Upon unpacking her things her dad asked her a question. "Addie, what happened to your face?" She didn't really think he cared since he was just now asking her this. "Why, it's not like you care anyways!" He seemed a little surprised.
"I'm worried about you. First you do... do whatever this is!! Next thing you know you'll be doing what... what Robbie did..." His voice seem hushed upon mentioning her brother's name. "You're not worried about me." He didn't know what to say anymore. "Addie... I know life hasn't been easy lately, but..." his voice trailed off. "I'm taking you to get help." He said as he left the room. Help? She didn't know what he even meant by that, but she didn't want help. She was fine. Or at least that's what she told herself. She finished unpacking most of her things before finally giving up and going to bed without dinner. She was too tired. The stitches on her face replacing the tears she cried daily. 
She woke up the next day to find her dad already dressed nicer than usual, and hurrying her to get ready. She ate some cereal and slipped on her hoodie and boots. The car glided down the empty street and Addie took no notice as they pulled into the parking lot of a small clinic. Once inside the clinic she and her father waited in small turqoise chairs near the magazine rack. "Addie?" A small blonde nurse said waiting for a response. Addie stood up and looked back once at her father as she followed the woman down a long void hallway. 
The nurses heels clicked loudly and echoed up and down the hall when they finally arrived at a small office. "Just take a seat dearie, and the doctor will be right with you." Addie waited around for a good five minutes before another woman with strawberry blonde hair walked in. She was much taller. "Miss Addie is it?" The doctor asked before pausing. "No." Addie said hesitantly. "No?" The doctor asked with a rather confused look whilst checking through her papers once more. "Call me... Obscura." Addie said rather amused. Addie had always thought that if she was to be described in one word, it would obviously be obscure. What better name than Obscura for an obscure girl, such as Addie herself. The doctor frowned trying not to glare at the stitches on the young girl's face. 
"Okay... Obscura... how did you get those stitches on the sides of your face?" Addie grinned. "You like them?" Addie said. Something inside of Addie snapped then and there. She looked to the floor and would not reply to any of the doctors questions. Once they left. Addie's dad looked at her furiously, "What was that little stunt you pulled back there?!?" Addie just looked out the window. He wouldn't understand the pressure she'd been holding back all these years. "Addie!! Answer me this instant!!!" She did nothing. Her left eye twitched as she sat there silently. They arrived home shortly. They stepped out of the car and once the got inside her father spoke again. "Addie, I'm trying to help you... Please cooperate... It's for the best." She went to her room without a word.
Later on she stepped quietly out of her bedroom. She walked towards the kitchen where she knew she would find her father drinking. She walked over to him and he turned to meet her gaze. She was holding a carving knife. He slowly said "Addie put that away right now." She smiled slightly at this. "Isn't life obscure?" She said in a deep maniacal tone. He stood up but she pushed the drunk man back down. He wasn't quite coherent and struggled to push her arm away as she lunged towards him in a sudden hysterical fit of laughter. He couldn't hold her off. She stabbed the knife into his neck, a deep red liquid pouring from the wound. She continued to stab until his impaired breathing finally died out. She stood up and walked toward the back door leaving with her knife and sketchbook in hand. She trudged through the dark woods away from her life. Away from reality.
Category:Mental Illness