All I Could Do Was Cry

is the eleventh episode of the eleventh season and the 231st overall episode of Grey's Anatomy.
==Short Summary==
After several discussions with Dr. Herman, April and Jackson must face their situation head on and make a difficult decision regarding their unborn child. Catherine arrives in Seattle and bumps into Richard at the hospital. Meanwhile, Meredith tries to find someone to take care of the kids so she can visit Derek for the weekend, and Amelia shows Stephanie some tough love when they work together on a case. 
==Full Summary==
Amelia is in the chapel, lighting a candle. The other candles are not lit yet. As she walks out, she roughly wakes up a sleeping intern. She says there are on-call rooms for that.
After a few flashbacks to their wedding, April and Jackson listen to what happens to type II babies when carried to term. They usually die within hours after birth. He's also at high risk for intra-uterine bone fractures. April is shocked to hear that the baby's bones are breaking in her uterus and she's devastated upon realizing that he can feel it, meaning he's in pain. Herman once again says she's sorry.
April and Jackson walk through the ER on their way out. Owen calls time of death on his patient with the patient's wife, covered in blood, crying outside the room. She's tended to by a nurse and a doctor when she collapses in tears.
Arizona finds Nicole just finishing off a conversation with April and Jackson, who wanted to talk some more, Herman explains. Arizona thinks Nicole should've called her, as she knows them and cares about her, so she could've made it as nice as it could be. And she doesn't think Nicole is nice. Nicole says that's exactly why she shouldn't be in the room for conversations like that. There's only one set of feelings that matters here and it's not Arizona's. Nicole doesn't know what's going to help April, but it's not Arizona. Nicole tells a teary-eyed Arizona that April is no longer her patient and walks off.
From outside the consult room, Catherine watches her son comfort his wife.
A crying April tells Catherine that there's no way to do what she believes she has to do. Catherine calmly tells her there's always a way. She tells April that they have to pick a day, soon, and set all things aside to be included. Then, they can name their beautiful baby boy and have him baptized right then and there. Then they got to hold him and pray for him and look at him and memorize every little detail of his face. And they will do that as long as he lives, until God takes him. Jackson and April agree to do that. April says maybe God won't take him. Maybe their son's a miracle. She'll pray for a miracle. Jackson holds her tight and says it's okay.
Bailey is in the chapel, lighting a second candle. As she wants to start praying, Meredith interrupts to ask her to take over her on-call shift. She wants to go see Derek, but Bailey says no because she's finally got a weekend alone with Ben. Meredith leaves and Bailey wants to start praying, but is again interrupted, this time by her pager. She says God knows what she was going to say and leaves.
After a few more flashbacks of April and Jackson's wedding, Bailey is in the ER, seeing it's a mess. Owen asks her to take a certain patient and explains the ER's a mess because April's gone. Bailey asks how Jackson and April are doing. He doesn't know. Callie comes over and asks where April is so she can tell her about her patient, but Bailey says she and Jackson are out today. Callie asks what they're going to do for them. Ben suggests flowers, but then realizes that's weird. Alex and Jo join in, but they can't think of anything. Amelia overhears them and says she lit a candle in the chapel. That made her feel better, and she suggests to give April and Jackson some privacy, as it's all they're gonna want. Owen seems to wonder how she knows that and while the rest walks off, he asks her to have lunch to discuss Herman's tumor plan. She says she can't.
Stephanie and Amelia are in Drew Hawkins's room. He's here for resection of a butterfly glioma. He's been totally blind for about a month now. He can still smell though, smelling Stephanie's lavender shampoo. Stephanie correctly answers Amelia's question as to why Drew's gone blind. Drew asks Amelia to show her the trick. Amelia throws a pen, and he catches it. Amelia explains Drew has cortical blindness. His eyes still see, but only the subconscious part of his brain receives the signals. So his subconscious saw the pen. Once she decompresses the tumor, she might possibly restore his sight. It's only a small possibility though. She's gonna try for a total resection, but at least she'll buy him some time. He knows, but he's excited that there's a chance that he may see again.
A paramedic unloads a woman who got shot. By her husband, she says. The husband climbs out of the ambulance too and says it was an accident. She's not so sure though, but he says that if he wanted to shoot her, he'd have done it in the woods and she'd still be there now. Ben tells them to calm down.
Bailey, Callie, and Ben are working on Brenda. She needs to go to the OR right away. Howard, her husband, apologizes, but she doesn't want to hear it. He and Brenda explain to Ben that he just came back from duck hunting and he was putting his shotgun away when the accident happened. She hates the duck hunting. She suddenly screams in pain and Callie takes a look on a scan, identifying a pellet close to the major vessels as the cause of her pain. As Bailey and Callie take her to the OR, they tell Ben to take care of her labs and have them rushed. Ben tells Howard they'll update him as soon as they can and directs him to the waiting area. An intern comes over and asks Ben what they do with the paper she's holding. He tells her they are for a patient's personals release, but he wants her to wait with those and he gives her the things that need to be taken to the lab. He tells her to rush them and goes to the OR. The intern doesn't appear to know what to do.
While waiting for Herman in a conference room, Jackson asks April what time she came to bed last night. She didn't until the morning. Herman comes in and she says she needs a few signatures before they proceed. April asks how they proceed after this. Herman says they'll take her to a room and give her the meds to induce labor, and then her body will know what to do from there. Herman gives them the paper for the birth certificate. As they haven't decided on a name yet, Herman suggests they sign the document now and fill out the rest later. They also need to sign consent forms, because what they're doing today is an induction termination. April's at 24 weeks, so technically, they could intervene to keep the baby alive after the delivery. Jackson signs the form, but April doesn't, asking what the other forms are. These are for the death certificate. Jackson and April want to hold off on that, but Herman really thinks it's better to have all the paperwork out of the way now so they never have to worry about it again. She senses they need a minute, so she leaves. April says all she wanted was to start a family with Jackson. She doesn't feel like anything of this is fair. Jackson agrees and the death certificate catches April's eye. She firmly says she's not signing it and pushes it away.
Stephanie lights the fifth candle in the chapel with Jo by her side. Stephanie feels really bad. She first found the baby's problem. She wished them misery and fights and break-ups when Jackson left her for April. Jo knows that Stephanie would never have wished them this. If it wasn't Stephanie, someone else would've found it. It's not on her, Jo assures her. If anything, it shows she's a good doctor. Stephanie finds comfort in those words and says she's now going to make a blind man see again.
A few more flashbacks to April and Jackson as newly-weds.
Meredith is giving Alex instructions on how to care for her children. He tells her to tell all that to Jo, as she's the one that's actually going to take care of them. Maggie asks what's going on, but Meredith tells Alex she's not going to leave her kids with Jo. As the intern eats jell-o at the nurses station they're all standing at, Meredith tells Alex that her person used to take care of her kids. Alex doesn't buy that. Meredith walks off. Maggie wonders why Meredith didn't ask her to watch the kids, as she's a person too. Alex says that's not what Meredith meant, and also, he says she doesn't want to be, because it's a pain in the ass. Alex wants to hand his tablet over to the intern, but she doesn't take it from him, so he slams it onto the desk.
In the OR, Brenda is complaining of abdominal pain. As Bailey asks Ben to get the ultrasound machine, Callie checks for wounds on her torso or her legs, and then finds that Brenda is actually in labor. Brenda doesn't believe that she's pregnant as she was told she couldn't get pregnant. Bailey assures her she's having one though, as she can see its head.
Jackson is helping April get comfortable in her room while discussing names. She refuses to call the baby Norbert after Jackson's favorite uncle, because Norbert is the kid who gets picked on at school. That's not gonna be their kid. She only now realizes the double meaning of that sentence as Herman comes in. She sees she's too early and says she'll be back. April doesn't want to go through with it until they have a name. She wants to wait in case a miracle happens. She doesn't even know why she's talking to him about it and decides she doesn't want to do this. She grabs her stuff and walks out.
As the OR is being set up to have the baby delivered, Callie doesn't understand how Brenda didn't know she was pregnant. Bailey asks Ben what happened to the lab results as she and Callie get gowned and gloved. He gave them to an intern, and doesn't know what she did with them. Bailey tells him he better go and find out.
Meanwhile in the ER, Owen finds the packet that the intern was supposed to take to the lab. He asks who left this, adding this would never happen if Kepner were here, and Richard says he'll take it to the lab.
As he's on his way to the lab, Richard sees Catherine walking at the other end of the hallway. They share a look and she quickly changes her route.
Bailey and Callie are arguing over who has to catch the baby if OB doesn't make it in time. Brenda still thinks they're wrong and complains of heavy pain in her shoulder. Bailey rushes over to take a look and gives her more lidocaine. They can't put her under yet until the baby's born. Callie sits down to deliver the baby and instructs Brenda on when to push. Bailey sees on the monitor that Brenda's going to lose her airway. As Brenda's pushing, her straining herself dislodges a clot, resulting in more bleeding. Bailey tries to stop it as Callie delivers the baby. She shows Brenda her baby girl.
In the chapel, Owen lights the ninth candle. As he finishes up, Alex joins him, asking if Owen knows how this is done. Not a clue, Owen says. Alex asks him if Cristina ever watched Meredith's kids. She did, but once the diaper blew out, Cristina would hold them up to Owen like a bag of medical waste. She would study and eat Zola's snacks while Owen played with them on the floor. He only did that for Cristina, so he's gonna do it this weekend for Alex. As Owen leaves, Alex tries to light a candle, but ends up burning his finger tip.
A few flashbacks to April and Jackson preparing for their baby, not knowing yet something was wrong with him.
As Amelia and Stephanie are discussing Drew's case and the low odds that he'll ever see again, Herman asks from the doorway what Amelia's doing. She thought Amelia was gonna go all her tumor all the time. Amelia explains she'll be using the same technique that she'll be using on Drew on her optic nerve, so it's a way to practice. Herman thought she had won Amelia over to join the dark side, but Amelia says never. Herman tells her to keep hope alive and walks off. Stephanie thinks of Drew's case now as a way to practice for Herman, but Amelia points out they can also look at it as buying Drew time. Amelia asks Stephanie to have radiology send everything up to the OR as she walks out.
As Alex arrives in the OR to take care of the baby, Brenda begs to see and hold her baby. Alex wants to show the baby to Brenda, but Bailey gestures to go. He assures Brenda her baby will be there when she wakes up. As Brenda continues to beg, Bailey says there's no time, or else they might lose her. The anesthesiologist then puts her under as Bailey apologizes. Bailey then sees that Brenda is throwing multifocal PVCs. Bailey does an ultrasound and sees one of the pellets has moved to Brenda's heart. The monitor starts beeping and Bailey asks to have cardio paged. She tells Brenda no more surprises.
Ben is telling Owen and Ben about the intern, but neither of them knows who he's talking about. As Meredith comes over, Owen and Ben take off to look for the intern. Meredith asks Richard to take over her on-call shift this weekend. He replies he may have plans, because he wants to available in case Catherine needs him with all that's going on with Jackson and April. Meredith says she'll find someone else, but he wants to know what's going on. She says she needs to go to D.C. for emergency sex.
Jackson finds April. He tells her she's right about miracles. Sometimes they happen, but this is not that. April says she's believed in God all of her life, and she followed His calling by becoming a doctor, she's finally becoming the person that He wanted her to be. And then to be handed this, is cruel. She feels like God is laughing at her. If this is a test, she fails. All those years of believing and praying... She suddenly realizes she wants to go back to work. She enters the ER.
The intern is watching the babies in the nursery, but quickly leaves when Alex comes over with Howard, who can't believe he's a father. He and Brenda tried for years, and all of their doctors said they couldn't have a baby. Brenda was mad for that. Alex explains it sometimes happens like that. Howard wanted to make an adventure of his relationship with Brenda since it was just the two of them, but she really wanted a baby. They both did. Alex says he can hold his daugther, which he is delighted about. He asks how his wife is.
"She's gonna die if I don't get that out," Maggie tells Bailey and Callie, looking at Brenda's scans. She needs to open her up. Bailey brings up the baby, but Maggie doesn't want to hear the extra pressure. Alex comes in as they are defibrillating Brenda. He brings up the miracle baby as they stabilize her heart. Maggie once again says it's not helping and starts cutting open Brenda's chest.
Jackson enters the chapel, where fifteen candles are lit. He sits down and starts talking to God. He doesn't know if God's out there or not, or if He can even hear or care about people who don't know if He's out there. Jackson doesn't know what to call him, but he knows that April believes in Him and needs Him. So he asks Him to show up for April. He starts crying.
Richard has just lit the twentieth candle as Catherine walks into the chapel. He didn't expect to see her here. April and Jackson asked for some privacy, so she's staying away. She and Richard sit down on opposite sides and he asks her what he can do. She asks him how many months it's been since Boston. About six months. And now it took something like this for him to pick up the phone and call her. He tries to explain, but she doesn't think it's the time for that. He understands, but he wants her to know that he's there for them if there's anything he can do. Catherine just wants to be alone right now. Richard walks off to give her some privacy.
There are some flashbacks to when April and Jackson found out about their son's condition.
Amelia and Stephanie are operating on Drew while Amelia explains to Stephanie how they'll use this technique in Herman's surgery. Stephanie is still convinced that Amelia is going to restore the man's sight. Amelia knows she's never gonna be able to remove all of this tumor. Stephanie asks why she's still operating then. "To improve my technique," Amelia replies. Stephanie says she should stop, because she's using this nice guy as a human skills lab. Amelia says Stephanie feels guilty because she's thinking about herself, while it has nothing to do with her. This is about Drew. This is his last hope, the chances are slim, and he knew that. She's thinking about what to tell Drew when he'll find that his last hope's gone, and she says Stephanie should too.
In the OR, Maggie takes the clamps off of Brenda's heart and has to use the paddles to get it beating again. This doesn't work, so Maggie massages the heart as Bailey tells Brenda to think about her new baby that she still has to hold. Maggie shocks again.
Owen is by April's side. He doesn't want her to be here unless she needs to be here, although he admits the place is a mess without her. Ben comes back and reports to Owen that no one knows about his mysterious intern. April says she runs the ER, so she knows every intern. As he's describing her, Ben sees the intern entering the ER. He starts yelling at her and sees she still has the patient's personals release form. April interrupts and tells him to stop. She knows that the woman doesn't work here. The woman says her name is Wendy. The papers are for her fiancé. April then recognizes her as the crying woman from last night. Wendy says she couldn't go home, and April remembers her crying.
April and Wendy have found some privacy. Wendy says that she and Michael were driving home from this lodge where they might have their wedding. And then there was this big truck and then they ended up in here. Wendy says everyone's been nice. They got her cleaned up and gave her the scrubs to wear. People thought she was a doctor and she apologizes in case she screwed anything up. They told her she could take Michael's things home when she was ready, but she hasn't been ready. April understands her as Wendy says that she and Michael had so many plans for their life, including a family, and now they're all gone. April hugs her and asks her if she believes in God. She does, but Michael didn't. April says that's okay. She has lost somebody and she's hurting, but April assures her she'll get through this. She tells Wendy that she's strong. She promises her she's gonna be okay.
April tells Jackson that their son should be named Samuel Norbert Avery. He agrees and April says she got what she was waiting for. She's ready to go back upstairs now.
Arizona is all alone in the chapel, lighting the twenty-fourth candle. She's visibly moved and remembers the tests she ran on April. 
Richard finds Meredith. He says his plans have changed, so he can take her weekend call. Maggie overhears Meredith say it's okay. She can go to D.C. another time. Richard tells her to take the advice from the man who's spent his life regretting the flights he never took. He tells her to go see Derek. Meredith says she doesn't have anyone to watch the kids since Amelia's working. "I'm here," Maggie interrupts. Maggie's moved here alone and Meredith's basically her only friend, so if Meredith ever needs something, Maggie will help her. Meredith thinks it's a different thing to ask her to babysit the kids, but Maggie would love to. She has experience with babysitting and she loves to bake and cook with the kids. Besides, they're her niece and nephew, so she would really love to babysit. Meredith is happy to hear that.
In the NeuroICU, Amelia tells Drew that she managed to remove 98% of the tumor, so she bought him time. Drew hasn't brought himself to open his eyes yet, but Amelia suggests he try now. So he does, and he asks her and Stephanie to talk so he gets to know who's who. He's delighted that he can see again.
Stephanie follows Amelia, saying she knew Amelia would pull it off, even though she said it was impossible. It was, Amelia says. Stephanie told her to stop though, Amelia reminds her. That's the difference here. Amelia knows what it's like to walk into an OR with little to no chances of success, to do all of the planning and labor and hoping and knowing that in the end, it may amount in nothing. It was impossible, but it is what's asked of them. If Stephanie can't do that, if she's not willing to keep looking for light in the darkest of places, without stopping, even when it seems impossible, she will never succeed. What Amelia is going to do with Herman's tumor is much harder than Drew's case. She only needs to get better and she's going to get there anyway she can. If Stephanie isn't willing to do all that, she shouldn't be working with Amelia and she probably shouldn't be a surgeon. Stephanie doesn't know what to say and walks off as Owen comes over. He asks Amelia if everything's all right. She says yep. He thanks her for the candle thing, as it works for him too.
Howard's crying as he's holding his baby. Bailey comes over and asks if he's okay. He is, but it's just been a lot for one day. Bailey then lets him walk into Brenda's room. Brenda is happy to see and hold her baby and the couple cherishes their miracle baby. Bailey and Callie smilingly watch them from outside the room. 
In April's room, Herman induces labor and delivers the baby. She gives him to Jackson and April, who take him into their arms. 
Moments later, a priest has joined them to baptize the baby. Herman stays with them.
April and Jackson are still holding their baby boy. April feels that he squeezed her finger, and then he let go.
Meanwhile, April's voice over says that they can't get too close to their patients, because if they feel all the hope and love disappear when the patient dies, they can't function.
Herman leaves the room and finds Arizona waiting for them. The baby has passed away, so Herman's gonna give them some time. Arizona thanks her for today, as it would've been harder for her had she been in there. Herman says it's never easy for anyone.
Catherine is waiting for Richard. When she sees him, she asks him to take her home to his bed and just hold her. He hugs her to comfort her and they leave the hospital together.
April's voice over says that doctors use the phrase "We're sorry for your loss" instead to offer the patient and their family a little bit of support, a bit of peace, or closure.
Meanwhile, Jackson is pushing April in her wheelchair. They both have flashbacks of significant moments in their life as a couple.
Amelia enters the chapel again and she's moved upon seeing that now all the candles are lit. She sits down to enjoy the view while April's voice over says that the phrase can offer some piece of beauty in the midst of someplace dark. Owen enters the chapel too and sits down next to Amelia to watch the candles together. She tells him her baby lived for 43 minutes. He takes her hand to show her his support. April's voice over mentions the phrase an unexpected gift when it's needed most. The camera zooms out to show all of the candles in front of the altar, followed a close-up of a one candle.
==Cast==
11x11MeredithGrey.png|Meredith Grey
11x11AlexKarev.png|Alex Karev
11x11MirandaBailey.png|Miranda Bailey
11x11RichardWebber.png|Richard Webber
11x11CallieTorres.png|Callie Torres
11x11OwenHunt.png|Owen Hunt
11x11ArizonaRobbins.png|Arizona Robbins
11x11AprilKepner.png|April Kepner
11x11JacksonAvery.png|Jackson Avery
11x11AmeliaShepherd.png|Amelia Shepherd
11x11JoWilson.png|Jo Wilson
11x11StephanieEdwards.png|Stephanie Edwards
11x11MaggiePierce.png|Maggie Pierce
11x11CatherineAvery.png|Catherine Avery
11x11BenWarren.png|Ben Warren
11x11HowardBonaman.png|Howard Bonaman
11x11Wendy.png|Wendy
11x11BrendaBonaman.png|Brenda Bonaman
11x11NicoleHerman.png|Nicole Herman
11x11DrewHawkins.png|Drew Hawkins
11x11Paramedic.png|Paramedic (right)
11x11PastorRhinehold.png|Pastor Rhinehold
===Main Cast===
*Ellen Pompeo as Dr. Meredith Grey
*Justin Chambers as Dr. Alex Karev
*Chandra Wilson as Dr. Miranda Bailey
*James Pickens, Jr. as Dr. Richard Webber
*Sara Ramírez as Dr. Callie Torres
*Kevin McKidd as Dr. Owen Hunt
*Jessica Capshaw as Dr. Arizona Robbins
*Sarah Drew as Dr. April Kepner
*Jesse Williams as Dr. Jackson Avery
*Caterina Scorsone as Dr. Amelia Shepherd
*Camilla Luddington as Dr. Jo Wilson
*Jerrika Hinton as Dr. Stephanie Edwards
*Kelly McCreary as Dr. Maggie Pierce
*Patrick Dempsey as Dr. Derek Shepherd (credit only)
===Guest Stars===
*Debbie Allen as Dr. Catherine Avery
*Jason George as Dr. Ben Warren
*Rob Nagle as Howard Bonaman
*Kim Hidalgo as Wendy
*Deidra Edwards as Brenda Bonaman
*Geena Davis as Dr. Nicole Herman
===Co-Starring===
*Jeremy Glazer as Drew Hawkins
*Gregory Michael Smith as Paramedic
*Oscar Best as Pastor Rhinehold
==Medical Notes==
===April Kepner===
*Diagnosis:
**Pregnancy
*Doctors:
**Nicole Herman (fetal surgeon)
*Treatment:
**Induction termination
After finding out that their baby had type II OI, April and Jackson decided to allow Nicole to induce labor. She labored and delivered Samuel Norbert Avery, whom they held until he died.
===Samuel Norbert Avery===
*Diagnosis:
**Type II osteogenesis imperfecta
*Doctors:
**Nicole Herman (fetal surgeon)
*Treatment:
Samuel was diagnosed in utero with type II osteogenesis imperfecta. April and Jackson decided to induce labor at 24 weeks and allow him to be born. Once he was born, they held him until he died.
===Michael===
*Diagnosis:
**Car accident injuries
*Doctors:
**Owen Hunt (trauma surgeon)
*Treatment:
**Attempted resuscitation
Michael was brought to the ER after a car accident. The doctors attempted resuscitation, but it was unsuccessful and he was pronounced dead at 6:40 in the ER.
===ER Patients===
*Diagnosis:
**Burns
*Doctors:
**Owen Hunt (trauma surgeon)
*Treatment:
Owen had two burn patients moved from the ER to the burn unit.
===Callie's Patient===
*Diagnosis:
**Femur fracture
*Doctors:
**Callie Torres (orthopedic surgeon)
*Treatment:
Callie said she was admitting a patient with a femur break.
===Callie's Other Patient===
*Diagnosis:
*Doctors:
**Callie Torres (orthopedic surgeon)
*Treatment:
Callie mentioned a patient who needed a consult from a respiratory therapist.
===Drew Hawkins===
*Diagnosis:
**Butterfly glioma
**Lesion
**Cortical blindness
*Doctors:
**Amelia Shepherd (neurosurgeon)
**Stephanie Edwards (surgical resident)
*Treatment:
**Tumor resection
Drew had a tumor in his brain and a lesion in his optic nerve which left him consciously blind, but unconsciously sighted, meaning he could reflexively react to stimuli such as a pen being thrown at him. He'd been totally blind for about a month. Amelia said she'd try for total resection, but at the very least, he'd get more time. Amelia was able to remove about 98% of his tumor, which would give him at least a few more years and restored his sight.
===Brenda Bonaman===
*Diagnosis:
**Gunshot wound
**Shoulder dislocation
**Zone two injury
**Pregnancy
*Doctors:
**Callie Torres (orthopedic surgeon)
**Miranda Bailey (general surgeon)
**Maggie Pierce (cardiothoracic surgeon)
**Ben Warren (surgical resident)
*Treatment:
**Vaginal delivery
**Surgery
Brenda, 44, was shot in the neck accidentally and brought to the ER. She also had a dislocated shoulder, which had to be reduced under anesthesia. She was taken directly to the OR. Before being sedated, she complained of stomach pain and was found to be pregnant and on the edge of delivery. While she was pushing, she dis-lodged a pellet from her neck and it traveled to her heart. Despite complications, they were able to remove all the pellets and repair the damage. She woke up after surgery and met her daughter.
===Baby Bonaman===
*Diagnosis:
*Doctors:
**Alex Karev (pediatric surgeon)
*Treatment:
Brenda delivered a baby immediately before her surgery.
==Music==
There was no licensed music used in this episode.
==Notes and Trivia==
thumb|right|300 px
*This episode's title originated from the song , originally sung by Etta James.
*This episode scored 7.81 million viewers.https://web.archive.org/web/20150214004417/http://tvbythenumbers.zap2it.com/2015/02/13/thursday-final-ratings-backstrom-adjusted-down-no-adjustment-to-the-blacklist-scandal-or-the-vampire-diaries/362826/
*Filming for this episode was scheduled from November 13 to November 25, 2014.
*As of this episode, Kelly McCreary is credited as a series regular.
*The musical score at the end of the episode is a slightly adapted version of the one used in We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together.
*The scene in which Stephanie is talking to Jo about April and Jackson in the chapel is similar to a scene in season 5 when Callie is talking to Arizona about Izzie in the same chapel.
*Like the mid-season premiere, this episode features a special version of the ending title card, showing the Grey's Anatomy title with a burning candle in the background.
*This episode is the first episode in which April Kepner does the voice over.
*Sarah Drew, pregnant at the time of shooting this episode, went into labor 10 hours after she filmed the scene where April Kepner gave birth to her son.
*Sarah described the table read for this episode as the most emotional she ever experienced.
==Gallery==
===Episode Stills===
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==Quotes==
:Amelia: My baby lived for 43 minutes.
----
:Arizona: Why didn't you call me? I mean, I can help them. They need someone who knows them and who cares about them and who can make it...
:Nicole: Who can make it what?
:Arizona: Nice. I want to make it as nice for them as it can be. And you're not nice.
:Nicole: You really care about them, don't you?
:Arizona: Yeah, I do. They're my friends.
:Nicole: And that right there is why you have no business in that room. There's only one set of feelings that matters here, and it's not yours. I don't know what's gonna help them, but it isn't you. April Kepner is no longer your patient.
----
:April: There's no way, no way for me to do what I need to do... and what I believe that I should do.
:Catherine: Shh, shh, shh. There is a way, sweetheart. There's always a way. Now, here's what we'll do. You will choose a day. Soon. Set it aside and arrange to be induced. And you'll give birth to your beautiful little boy. And you'll give him a name and have him baptized right then and there. Then you're gonna get to hold that baby. And you'll pray for him and sing to him. You're gonna look at him. You're gonna look at him and memorize every little detail of his face. And you will do that as long as he lives. You will do that until God takes him. That's how you will do this.
:Jackson: We can do that.
:April: Can you do that for me?
:Jackson: Oh, of course I'll do that for you. I'll do that for you and him and us.
----
:Drew: Pretty fly for a blind guy, right?
----
:Stephanie: I wished horrible things for them, Jo. Jackson left me for her, and I wished them misery and fights and breakups. I mean, I'd see them sitting together in the cafeteria, and I'd wish them food poisoning. Then I found this.
:Jo: You would never have wished them this. You know that. If you hadn't have found it, somebody else would have. It wouldn't have changed anything. It's not on you. If anything, it just means that you're a good doctor.
:Stephanie: Okay. I'm gonna go make a blind man see.
----
:Maggie: She asked you to watch her kids?
:Alex: Yeah, she's wigging out about trying to go to D.C. to see Derek.
:Maggie: Why didn't she ask me? I'm a person.
:Alex: That's not what she meant. And you don't want to be, trust me. It's a pain in the ass.
----
:April: No, I'm sorry. I know he's your favorite Uncle, but you can't name a child Norbert. Norbert's the kid that gets his lunch money stolen, he's the kid that gets punched on the playground. That's not gonna be our kid.
----
:Alex: Hey, uh, did Yang ever watch Meredith's kids? (sees Owen's face) See, I knew it. Mer's full of crap. I don't have to babysit for her.
:Owen: No, no, she did. Cristina would take Zola. She'd take her home. And then when the diaper blew out, she'd hold her up to me like a bag of medical waste. Cristina would study. She'd eat all of Zola's snacks. And I would be the one down on the floor playing with blocks, so yes and no.
:Alex: What are you doing this weekend?
:Owen: I'd do it for Cristina, I'm not doing it for you.
----
:April: He gave me a calling, and I followed it. I save lives every day. I feel like I'm... I'm finally becoming the person that he wants me to be. And then this... to be handed this? It's cruel. I feel like God is laughing at me. If this is a test, I fail. All those years trusting and believing and praying... And if this... if this were just, even a tiny bit, then I could maybe... I can't. I have to go back to work.
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:Jackson: God... I don't know. I don't know, uh... If you're out there or not, um, or if you can even hear people who don't know if you're out there. Or if you give a crap about what they say. But, um... God, Yahweh, Buddha, E.T., whatever... April knows. Right? She believes. And she needs you. So, uh... Um, show up for her? Please? Show up for April. She loves you. She needs you. Please, uh... Show up for her. Please.
----
:April: Wendy, do you believe in God?
:Wendy: Yes. But he didn't. Michael didn't believe.
:April: It's okay. You can believe enough for the two of you. You have lost somebody, and you are hurting, but you will get through this. You can survive this. You are strong. It's okay. You are gonna be okay. I promise.
----
:April: Samuel Norbert Avery. That should be our son's name.
:Jackson: It should.
:April: Yeah. I think I got what I was waiting for.
:Jackson: You did?
:April: Let's go back upstairs. I'm ready now.
----
:Richard: Take it from a man who has spent his life regretting the flights he never took. Get on the plane, see Derek. It is a big deal.
:Meredith: But I don't have anyone to watch my kids and Amelia is working, so...
:Maggie: I am here.
:Meredith: What?
:Maggie: I said I'm here. I moved here alone and I have made one friend, and I consider you my friend.
:Meredith: Oh, I just... I mean, I didn't even...
:Maggie: No, I'm just saying. If you ever need something, like if you ever need help moving or, like, a ride to the airport, like, I'm that kind of friend.
:Meredith: But I can't ask you to babysit my kids.
:Maggie: Are you kidding me? I would love to. I was a girl scout, and I was registered with a babysitting service as a teenager. And I'm good. I mean, I'm a "play on the floor and cook for them" babysitter.
:Meredith: You cook?
:Maggie: And I bake. Kids love baking, and I love babies, and babies love me. And, you know, they're my niece and nephew, so I would... I would love to. I would love to.
:Meredith: You... you don't have to bake.
:Maggie: Okay, but can I?
----
:Amelia: I know what it is to walk into a hospital OR with little or no chance of success, to do all of the planning and hoping and labor, knowing that in the end, it may amount to nothing. It's impossible. But it is what is asked of us. And if you can't do it, if you aren't willing to keep looking for light in the darkest of places without stopping even when it seems impossible, you will never succeed. What I am doing next with Herman is much, much harder than this. I only need to be better, and I am gonna get there any way I can. If you are not willing to do that, then you shouldn't be working with me and you probably shouldn't be a surgeon.
----
:April: He squeezed my finger... and then he let go.
----
:Catherine: Can you just take me home? Take me home, take me to bed, and just hold me?
==See Also==
fr:Besoin d'un miracle
de:Höllenqualen
Category:All Episodes
Category:GA Episodes
Category:GA S11 Episodes