Who Else But Primitive?

This is the nineteenth episode of The SBFW Chronicles.
==Transcript==
Channel 5 announcer: The following program contains nudity, profanity, and lots and lots of cocaine. Viewer discretion is advised.
(The episode starts with Prim putting on a Garfield fur suit)
Prim: Wait a minute I'm not a furry.
(He throws the fur suit in the trash can)
Einstein: NOOOOOOO-
Prim: Where did you come from?
Einstein: Oopsie woopsie, I'm living in your cwoset uwu!
Prim: Stop existing.
Einstein: Okay. (stops existing)
Prim: Wait wut-
(Fake credits roll, and then Prim eats them)
Prim: I haven't had breakfast yet. Speaking of…
(Cut to Prim at the dinner table eating a bowl of Dild-o’s)
Prim: Mmm… dildos. Why does that sound like something Jasbre would say?
Jasbre: BECAUSE THAT WAS MY LINE YOU FUCKING C- (screen goes black)
Woodhouse: Oh dear. Bad word practices. We’ll be back after these messages.
CartoonGuy: DO YOU LIKE SHOWERING WITH YOUR DAD?
Kid: No?
CartoonGuy: Well too bad, I'm gonna force you to see daddy dong today.
Renaud: Come to daddy, little one!
(The kid cries like a baby)
Forest: Kinky!
Renaud: You and I are one of a kind.
(The scene returns to Prim sitting at his computer doing the deed)
Prim: OH! I didn't see you there. Yes, you. The degenerate reading this episode right now. Chances are, you're wondering what I'm doing in this episode. Well, there's these… mmm… delicious… GARFIELD FEET!
Dan Schneider: I for one second that statement.
Prim: Get out, overused foot joke enthusiast.
Dan Schneider: OVERUSED? Hmph. (he exits, but not before showing his feet accompanied with a woman screaming)
Vanessa: Hey that's my voice! Where did you get it from?
Dan: Can I insert myself into your-?
Vanessa: Boobs, fuck off.
Dan: I WAS NOT GONNA SAY THAT!
Prim: Why care about boobs when Garfield feet are always in stock?
Dan: Boobs are also always in stock. They also make my stocks rise.
Golf: That was my line, douchebag.
Prim: CAN YOU STOP TALKING ABOUT BOOBS FOR ONE MOMENT BEFORE I GET A RESTRAINING ORDER? I have Garfield feet to look for. 
Dan: Where does Garfield live anyway?
(Prim types away on his phone)
Prim: He lives in Jon’s house, eh? Where the hell does Jon live?
(Prim types on his phone again and pulls up Jon’s location)
Prim: BINGO!
Dan: Does he have a nice cock?
Prim: Get outta here, Dan.
Dan: Ugh, fine.
(Dan jumps out of the nearest window)
Prim: Anyways… It's time to finish up this terrible plotline.
(Prim pulls down his pants and then runs to his orange car)
Prim: The pulling-down-pants part isn’t really important, I just like doing that.
(He starts the car, and he gets a text from someone named Sharko)
Sharko: Huge tits.
Prim: Not this guy again. Doesn’t he know I’m busy with something important?
(Prim throws the phone out the window, killing the Channel 5 announcer from earlier)
Channel 5 announcer’s wife: OH GOD OH FU- wait that is very coarse language. I apologise.
(Cut to a Family Guy-like shot of Jon’s house. It then cuts to Jon watching TV with Garfield)
Jon: So Garfield, how’s your BMI today?
Garfield: I have no fucking idea, Johnathan. Why don’t you go measure it?
Jon: Being a bit of a sassy cat today, eh? Well that just means one less lasagna for dinner tonight.
Garfield: FUCK YOU I’M GARFIELD I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT. IN FACT, I WILL GO OUTSIDE JUST TO SPITE YOU
(Garfield gets up from the couch and opens the door. Prim is on the other side)
Garfield: Hey, you kinda look like… me!
Prim: GARFIELD FEET
Garfield: What le fuck is going on here-
(Prim grabs Garfield’s feet and starts licking them)
Garfield: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING YOU WEIRDO?
Prim: They taste like fur.
Garfield: NO SHIT YOU FUCKING-
(Prim licks harder)
Garfield: AAAAA STOP OR I’M CALLING MY LAWYER!
Jon: Heh. That’s what he gets for going outside without permission.
(Jon eats a spicy chip and then explodes, the fucking end)
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