A Guide to Fun

is a Quest in Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn.
==Journal==
* The chief attendant remains concerned that his shorthanded staff will fail to meet the demands of the campaign crowd. He bids you report to the guides responsible for hospitality in Event Square, Round Square, or Wonder Square, and put yourself at the disposal of the Saucer's guests.
※Please note that you will be unable to complete this quest after the seasonal event has ended. For details, please check the Lodestone.
* You have rendered what service you may to the Saucer's visitors. Return to Entrance Square and report to the chief attendant.
* Upon returning to the chief attendant, you receive both praise for your efforts and payment for your service. Should you wish to provide further assistance, it seems the Saucer's special campaign is set to continue...
==Objectives==
* Speak with a Gold Saucer guide.
* Report to the chief attendant.
==Script==
script 	script
 	
Stafff 	These crowds show no sign of thinning... Might you be willing to brave another round of interaction with our guests?
Stafff 	Splendid! Then I shall send you once more unto the breach! As of present, our most congested areas appear to be Event Square, Round Square, and Wonder Square.
Stafff 	Report to the Saucer's guides in any of these three squares, and see to it that our visitors are catered to!
Stafff 	Event Square, Round Square, and Wonder Square are all in need of supplementary staff, so take your pick!
 	
Staff03964 	Thank you for coming! Are you ready to begin your shift?
Staff03964 	Excellent! Our guests await your assistance!
 	
Hamon 	Hah hah hah! Is that you, [Player Name]?
Hamon 	...Working as a guide, you say? Well, I could use some suggestions.
Hamon 	Hah hah hah! You look like the helpful sort!
Hamon 	You see, I'm having a terrible time choosing which game to play. In my younger days, I would impress the ladies with my vigorous pugilism, but I wonder if excelling at one of these amusements might have a similar effect...?
Hamon 	Oho, why didn't I think of that! Stand aside─the Holyfist needs to go and rack up a holy high score!
Hamon 	...Hm. I'm not sure how that'll bring the lovelies running, but I suppose some prefer the more thoughtful type.
Mylla 	[Player Name]! What brings you to the Gold Saucer?
Mylla 	...I see. Perhaps you might help me then.
Mylla 	Excuse me, might I ask for some assistance?
Mylla 	I needed some time away from the Coliseum, but even in play I hope to find ways to improve my bladework. Would any of these diversions serve such a role?
Mylla 	Ah, so you must anticipate and avoid the sword strikes, yes? That sounds perfect!
Mylla 	I struggle to imagine how that could enhance my swordplay, but I shall take a look if I have a spare moment...
Adalberta 	Fancy meeting you here. Taking a break from breaking rock, eh?
Adalberta 	...Ah, more work than play, then. Either way, I could do with some advice...
Adalberta 	You work here, yes? If you have a moment, I could do with some advice...
Adalberta 	What kind of amusing things do they have for a miner like me? I've spent endless hours clambering about mountains and such, so I can handle some jumping and climbing.
Adalberta 	Oh, that does sound like a challenge! I'd say my time in craggy places puts me at an advantage, but I suppose we'll see!
Adalberta 	They say you should put work aside from time to time, but I wonder if something like that would keep my interest...?
Staff03964 	Thank you, Mistress/Master [Player Name]─that should be sufficient for the moment. Now, as for the results of your performance...
Staff03964 	...It seems every guest with whom you spoke was greatly enthused by your recommendations! A flawless display of service! You really must consider joining us as a full-time employee!
Staff03964 	...It seems you were a touch too hasty with one or two of your recommendations. Overall, I would mark it a fair attempt.
Staff03964 	...It seems our guests were not terribly enthused by your recommendations. Perhaps a little more time spent studying our attractions would serve you better?
Staff03964 	But putting such matters aside, any effort made towards maintaining the Saucer's reputation for hospitality is most appreciated. Pray collect your wages from the chief attendant at Entrance Square!
 	
Gerolt 	Bloody hells! Give a man a break! Did ye follow me here or summat!?
Gerolt 	...Just pitchin' in then, are ye? Well, ain't ye the perfect saint... Although come to think of it, might be as ye could do me a favor!
Gerolt 	Oi! Yer a guide, ain't ye? I need ye to do some guidin'.
Gerolt 	Ye see, I'm lookin' for a game to stack them points up swift-like, but I don't fancy prancin' about or learnin' a bunch o' rules. I can swing a mean hammer, if that helps.
Gerolt 	Now that sounds custom-made for a master smith like me! Stand aside─it's time to loosen up the ol' swingin' arm!
Gerolt 	An' ye reckon me smithin' skills'll see me through summat like that? I s'pose I'll give it a look...
Thubyrgeim 	Ah! How pleasant to find a familiar face! Are you also come to enjoy a respite from the world's demands?
Thubyrgeim 	...The opposite, then. I was, in fact, in search of guidance...if you might indulge me.
Thubyrgeim 	Excuse me, miss/sir. I find myself in need of guidance...
Thubyrgeim 	Which of these many attractions would you recommend for an arcanist? A game which challenges the mind would be most preferable.
Thubyrgeim 	Yes, the need for a solid strategy appeals to me. And as a customs officer, I've become curious to learn more of Far Eastern traditions. An excellent idea!
Thubyrgeim 	I imagine that would require me to exercise more body than mind...but, no, we mustn't neglect the physical in our quest for the cerebral.
Cocobuki 	Hm hm hm... Have you been lured by this abyss of amusement as well, [Player Name]?
Cocobuki 	Ah, a guide to souls lost in the madness. Commendable. I, myself, would welcome a nudge in the right direction...
Cocobuki 	Guide! I have need of your services.
Cocobuki 	I seek the diversion in which a voidsent creature─one summoned by the thaumaturgical arts of my own guild, no less─is featured most prominently. Know you of such an attraction?
Cocobuki 	So Typhon is here. I must inspect the measures employed in his containment, and ensure there is no danger to the populace. If you will excuse me...
Cocobuki 	Hm? Is there perhaps another entity of the void here of whose existence I was unaware? I suppose it is possible...
Staff03964 	Thank you, Mistress/Master [Player Name]─you've given me the chance to attend to several other vital duties. Now, shall we review your performance?
Staff03964 	Well, I'm happy to say that every guest seemed well satisfied by your recommendations! An admirable display of service! Has anyone spoken with you about becoming a full-time employee...?
Staff03964 	Well, I'm afraid you stumbled with one or two of your recommendations. On the whole, however, you did rather well for a novice.
Staff03964 	Well, I must say that our guests did not seem overly pleased with your advice. I suggest you study our attractions again, and more carefully consider which guest might find which amusement the most appealing...
Staff03964 	But putting such matters aside, we appreciate any effort made towards maintaining the Saucer's reputation for hospitality. Dismissed! Oh, and don't forget to return to Entrance Square and collect your wages from the chief attendant!
 	
Jacke 	Well, well, if it ain't the infamous [Player Name]! Ye here for play, or is it other mischief ye've got in mind?
Jacke 	Honest work, is it!? Yer an odd cove, lass/lad, but that don't mean I won't take yer advice.
Jacke 	A fine evenin'/mornin'/day/evenin' to ye, lass/lad. If I could have a whid with ye real quick-like...
Jacke 	Tell me, which o' these games is most like to get a bloke's blood racin', then? Preferably somethin' what rewards nimble dew beaters an' a disregard for danger.
Jacke 	Oho, dodgin' bombs, eh? Now that does sound like a lark! Thanks for the idea!
Jacke 	Hm... Might be as we've got different ideas o' what passes for excitement. Thanks all the same, though!
Serendipity 	[Player Name], how lovely to see you!
Serendipity 	...Working as a guide, you say? What a happy coincidence! I was actually feeling a bit lost...
Serendipity 	Excuse me! Sorry to bother, but I'm afraid I'm feeling a bit lost...
Serendipity 	Could you point me in the direction of one of the less-intimidating attractions? Perhaps due to my occupation, I have a weakness for all things small and well made─and squealingly adorable, if I'm being honest.
Serendipity 	Armies of clockwork dolls!? All squeezed together in one tiny arena? Eeeeee!
Serendipity 	I...seem to have explained myself poorly. That promises to lead to a more terrified sort of squealing...
Gegeruju 	My dear adventurer! I would have thought you far too busy─and stiflingly straitlaced─to frequent a den of frivolity such as this!
Gegeruju 	...Ah, well that explains it. Seeing as you've taken a position to serve, I see no reason not to call upon your services...
Gegeruju 	Oh, guiiide! You are in the enviable position of providing a service to the master of Costa del Sol!
Gegeruju 	I am, shall we say, an “admirer” of beauty of the kitten-ish kind. Is there some simple amusement which might also indulge my discerning gaze? And let me be clear: I am a creature of comfort, entirely unsuited to exertion or exhaustion.
Gegeruju 	Just a few button presses, you say!? And some lovely young bunnies lounging nearby into the bargain! While I'm more of a “cat-lover,” variety is, after all, the spice of life!
Gegeruju 	That sounds terribly tiresome. Are you sure this will help me meet some pretty young thing? I shall...ugh...make an effort, then.
Staff03964 	Thank you, Mistress/Master [Player Name]─I'll not ask you to sacrifice your entire evening/morning/afternoon/evening. Do allow me, however, a quick word to summarize your performance...
Staff03964 	...Perfect! Simply perfect! Why, our guests might mistake you as one of our full-time employees!
Staff03964 	...Adequate. Merely adequate. Although it seems one or two of our guests were somewhat leery of your recommendations, I cannot fault your enthusiasm.
Staff03964 	...Abysmal? Awful? I take no issue with your demeanor, but please, for the love of Master Manderville, do listen carefully when the guests are explaining their desires...
Staff03964 	Evaluations aside, we stand by our promise to reward those who work to maintain the Saucer's reputation for hospitality. The chief attendant will pay your wages back at Entrance Square!
 	
Stafff 	Thank you for your continued efforts! Here is your payment, as promised.
Stafff 	Any further assistance you might provide during the campaign would be greatly appreciated!
Quest complete.	Quest complete.
Category:Gold Saucer Festivities Quests