Transcripts/To Where and Back Again - Part 2

:[Previously on My Little Pony]
:Starlight Glimmer: It's... the ponies from my old village.
:Village ponies: [increasingly deranged laughter]
:Starlight Glimmer: Oh. It's only a dream.
:Starlight Glimmer: With my past, I should never be in charge of anything!
:Princess Luna: They've taken my sister and I! It's worse than the last time!
:Starlight Glimmer: Chrysalis and the changelings are back. They've ponynapped all of the most powerful ponies in Equestria!
:Starlight Glimmer: ...this is Thorax. He's a reformed changeling.
:Discord: [hushed] They took Fluttershy?
:Trixie: [whimpers] I think I have a pretty good idea where she might be...
:
:Discord: Oh, this is so strange. We're here and that's there, and I clearly meant for us to be there and not here.
:Thorax: Oh, I-I can probably explain—
:Discord: Oh, well. If at first you don't succeed...
:Starlight Glimmer: Maybe we should come up with a plan first?
:Discord: [blows] A what?
:Trixie: You know, figuring out the best way to do something before you actually do it.
:Discord: [laughs] Oh, that's adorable. But you see, unlike you, I can do anything.
:Thorax: Uh, actually—
:Discord: That's all very nice, but really a waste of time. We have me. And what else could we possibly need?
:Trixie: A draconequus with magic and half a brain might help.
:Discord: Why are you here again? I mean, it's not like you're going to stop the changelings by pulling a rabbit out of a hat. At least my magic can do something.
:Thorax: The thing about magic here is—
:Discord: Like this! [snaps] For Fluttershy! Yaaah! [snaps]
:Pigasus: [oinks]
:Thorax: I've been trying to tell you! Nothing other than changeling magic works here. Chrysalis' throne is carved from an ancient dark stone that soaks up outside magic the same way changelings soak up love. It's how she keeps the hive safe.
:[magic fizzles]
:Trixie: [to Starlight] So, uh, what kind of plan were you thinking?
:Starlight Glimmer: Without magic, I have no idea. But nopony else is coming. So somepony better come up with something.
:[beat]
:Starlight Glimmer: Anypony? Anything? Hmm. This throne – if we get into the hive and destroy it, can we get our magic back?
:Thorax: Uh-huh!
:Discord: Well, that's a terrible plan. How are we even supposed to get to the hive?
:Trixie: We walk.
:Discord: I haven't walked that far in a millennia!
:Starlight Glimmer and Trixie: [groan]
:Discord: Oh, I don't know how any of you manage not being able to disappear and reappear whenever you want!
:Trixie: Well, I, for one, definitely miss you being able to disappear!
:Starlight Glimmer: Give Discord a break. None of us knew we weren't going to be able to use magic.
:Thorax: I did.
:Starlight Glimmer: If we get separated, it might make sense to have a way to make sure we are who we say we are.
:Discord: Oh! Like a secret code! How about if I say "we are" and you say "doomed"? Or you say "rescue" and I say... [flails]
:Trixie: How about if we say "klutzy" and you say "draconequus"?
:Starlight Glimmer: "Klutzy draconequus". Works for me.
:Thorax: I'll definitely remember it.
:Trixie: Okay. I am definitely glad you came. I don't think we'd be able to find our way without you.
:Thorax: You definitely wouldn't.
:[rock creaking]
:Trixie: Um, where's the way out?
:Thorax: It's a changeling hive. It shifts and changes like we do, and we're the only ones who can navigate it. It's total chaos to non-changelings.
:Discord: Well, it's decent chaos. I don't know if I'd call it "total".
:Discord: Are we sure that I'll get my magic back when we destroy this throne thingy?
:Starlight Glimmer: If Thorax is right, then yes.
:Discord: [sarcastic] Well, that's reassuring.
:Trixie: And how are we supposed to destroy the throne when we find it?
:Starlight Glimmer: I... don't know.
:Trixie: [sarcastic] That's reassuring.
:[rustling]
:Discord: I don't suppose you brought any throne-destroying tools along with these useless sideshow props.
:Trixie: Asks the Lord of Chaos who can't go for a walk without whining nonstop!
:Discord: Yes, but when the throne is destroyed, I'll be able to rip the very fabric of reality to save our friends, while you'll still be a self-absorbed, below-average illusionist!
:Trixie: Self-absorbed?! Why, you...!
:Starlight Glimmer: Cut. It. Out! I'm just barely keeping it together, and it would be wonderful if you two could actually try to help instead of bickering like foals!
:Discord: [defeated] Okay.
:Trixie: How can we help?
:Starlight Glimmer: Don't ask me! I couldn't even handle giving advice at the Sunset Festival, and I had magic then! And the three of us are as good as useless! At least Thorax knows where we're going.
:Thorax: Um, guys? I think we're lost.
:Trixie: Oh, great. We might as well just sit here and wait for the changelings to soak up all of our love or whatever gross thing it is that they do. How often do you all get hungry?
:Thorax: Actually, I haven't been since I met Spike. And changelings are always hungry. We can never get enough love.
:Trixie: Well, that's just super—
:Starlight Glimmer: But you aren't hungry at all now?
:Thorax: Huh. Once I made a few friends, I guess I just sort of forgot about the whole feeding thing.
:Starlight Glimmer: Is that about the same time your wings changed?
:Thorax: I guess so.
:Discord: [yawns] While I would love to sit around chitchatting about feeding and not feeding, [echoing] I have a Fluttershy to save! [echoes]
:[changelings hissing]
:Trixie: [hushed] Can you please lower your voice?! You're gonna get us all captured!
:Discord: Oh, you keep saying that, but I haven't seen an actual changeling since we got into this hive.
:[distant humming]
:Trixie: W-What's that?
:Thorax: A changeling patrol!
:[changeling screeches]
:Thorax: [hyperventilating]
:Discord: This seems like one of those moments where we need a plan.
:Trixie: What kind of plan?! We have no magic, and it's not like my illusions are gonna save us!
:Starlight Glimmer: Do you have any of your smoke bombs?
:Trixie: Are you kidding?
:[changelings' wings buzzing]
:: Looking for somepony?
:[changelings screech]
:: Is that the best you've got?! [laughing]
:[various poofs]
:Discord: Not exactly great and powerful, but effective.
:Trixie: Hm. I'll take it.
:Starlight Glimmer: "Klutzy"...
:Trixie and : ..."draconequus"!
:[transformation zap]
:Discord: Ugh. I really think we need a new code word!
:Thorax: That was a pretty good plan.
:Trixie: But we still don't know where we're going.
:Starlight Glimmer: Actually, we might. Two of the changelings didn't go with the rest.
:Thorax: Oh! With an intruder in the hive, they went to protect the queen! Good thinking, Starlight!
:Starlight Glimmer: [embarrassed laugh]
:[changelings' wings buzzing]
:Trixie: Now what?
:Starlight Glimmer: We... go in.
:Thorax: Even if I wanted to, there's no way past the guards. We'll be spotted for sure.
:Starlight Glimmer: We need some kind of... distraction.
:Trixie: I'm fresh out of smoke bombs.
:Discord: Normally, I'm the most distracting thing I can think of, but without magic...
:Starlight Glimmer: You shouldn't underestimate yourself.
:[doors closing]
:Discord: [taps microphone] Hello, changelings and changelettes! Believe me, I was just as surprised as you are that I'm here! When I heard that I'd be playing for a bunch of changelings, I was beside myself! Then I realized, it was just one of you.
:[rimshot]
:[changelings snarl]
:Discord: [nervous laugh] But, seriously, this isn't the toughest crowd I've ever been in front of. But it's definitely the easiest to bug!
:[rimshot]
:Discord: "To bug"? Is this thing on? [taps microphone]
:[changelings snarl]
:Discord: Well, if you think that you can do any better, be my guest!
:[microphone feedback]
:[changelings' wings buzzing]
:Trixie: It is absolutely ridiculous that that worked.
:[changelings' wings buzzing]
:Discord: It is certainly a pleasure to have such dedicated fans. I'll have to come back with some new material after I rescue Fluttershy.
:Fluttershy: [whimpers] Please, help! [whimpers]
:Discord: Fluttershy!
:Fluttershy: Discord! I'm stuck!
:Discord: You certainly are. And I should probably help you get free. But... oh-ho-ho-ho-ho...
:Fluttershy: But what?
:Discord: But you are obviously not Fluttershy!
:Fluttershy: Oh.
:Discord: I mean, I'm separated from the group and just happen to come across the one pony I care most about? I can smell this setup a mile away.
:Fluttershy: [sniffs, crying] No. You're right. There's no way you should trust me. Just go find the others. [wailing] I understand!
:Discord: Oh, come on!
:Fluttershys: [crying]
:Fluttershy #1: We're probably all changelings. You shouldn't rescue any of us. Unless, you think, maybe one of us might be the real Fluttershy. Oh, that certainly would be a nasty changeling trick, wouldn't it?
:Fluttershys: [crying]
:Fluttershy #2: I'm the real one.
:Fluttershy #3: I'm the real one.
:Fluttershy #4: I'm the real Fluttershy.
:Thorax: We can't wait for Discord. Between seeing him and Trixie, the castle will be crawling with guards soon.
:Starlight Glimmer: But if we do manage to destroy Chrysalis' throne, we'll need him. He could take on the entire changeling army by sneezing if he wanted to.
:Trixie: He's probably already been captured!
:: Hello? Fellow rescuers?
:Thorax: We can't stay here. We gotta find the throne.
:: Ooh! I heard some of the changelings who were chasing me say that they know where it is!
:Trixie: "Klutzy"...?
:: Hmm? Oh. Yeah. [chuckling] I-I can be klutzy. Now, follow me.
:Starlight Glimmer: [whispering] You know that's not Discord, right?
:Trixie: Obviously.
:: This way! We're almost there!
:Thorax: I know this trick. If he says to go left, we should definitely go right. He's leading us to a swarm waiting to attack!
:Trixie: [sighs] Okay, I'll handle it. You two just get ready to run into the other tunnel.
:Starlight Glimmer: Wait, what?! Trixie, you can't! I won't know what to do! We've already lost Discord; I can't lose you too! Without magic, I—
:Trixie: Starlight. You got us this far with just my illusions and Discord's annoying personality. You don't need magic to figure out what to do next. I know you're afraid to be in charge, but you are really good at it! Listen to your best friend. Hey, Discord! Want to see the new trick I've been working on? I call it the "Changeling Catcher"! Run!
:[transformation zap]
:[changeling hisses]
:[changelings hissing]
:Trixie: [nervously] Ta-da...
:[changelings screech]
:Starlight Glimmer and Thorax: [panting]
:[changelings' wings buzzing]
:[splat]
:Queen Chrysalis: [laughing evilly] One little pony all by herself. [joints cracking] Oh, how will I ever prevent this daring rescue?
:[changelings screech]
:[changelings hiss]
:Queen Chrysalis: Well, well, well. The Princess of Friendship's sole pupil. Honestly, I didn't think you were worth replacing with one of my drones.
:: [strains] You won't get away with this!
:Queen Chrysalis: I already have. Nopony is coming to save you. Your little squad was it. And now, there's just you.
:: Thorax is still out there.
:Queen Chrysalis: Don't mention that traitor's name in my kingdom! He was a fool to leave and even more a fool to return! When I find him, he'll learn just what happens to those who betray the hive!
:: [whimpers]
:Queen Chrysalis: And it seems I don't have far to look, do I...
:: [whimpers]
:[transformation zap]
:Queen Chrysalis: Thorax?
:[changelings hiss]
:[pounding]
:Starlight Glimmer: [whimpers]
:[zap]
:Queen Chrysalis: Very clever. And clearly Thorax revealed to you the secret of my throne. I can't have powerful ponies using their abilities against me. Even with your rather embarrassing little rescue attempt, everything has gone according to my plan.
:Starlight Glimmer: What plan? Why did you do all this?!
:Queen Chrysalis: So I could feed, of course! By replacing the most beloved figures in Equestria, my drones will be able to store all the love meant for them and return it here to me. Everypony will do as I command, and my subjects and I will feed on their love for generations! [maniacal laughter]
:[changelings hissing]
:Starlight Glimmer: What if you didn't have to?
:Queen Chrysalis: Ridiculous! The hunger of changelings can never be satisfied!
:Starlight Glimmer: Exactly! Thorax left the hive and made a friend. He shared love, and now he doesn't need to feed. You don't have to live your lives starving all the time!
:Queen Chrysalis: You know nothing of the changelings or what it takes to be their queen! I decide what is best for my subjects, not some mewling grub!
:Starlight Glimmer: I know what it's like to lead by fear and intimidation! And I know what it's like to want everypony to do what you say! But I was wrong. A real leader doesn't force her subjects to deny who they are! She celebrates what makes them unique and listens when one of them finds a better way!
:Queen Chrysalis: The only thing Thorax has found is what happens to those who turn their back on the hive!
:[dark magic]
:Starlight Glimmer: No! Stop!
:Queen Chrysalis: Just as soon as I drain every last ounce of love from him and show my subjects what a real leader is!
:Thorax: [straining] I can feel the love inside me slipping away...! I can't hold onto it much longer...!
:Starlight Glimmer: Then don't! Sharing love is what made you different to begin with! You should share yours with Chrysalis! Give her all of it!
:[magic blasts]
:Starlight Glimmer: This is what happens when you give love freely instead of taking it!
:[transformation sounds]
:[kaboom!]
:[music]
:Discord: Fluttershy?
:Fluttershy: It's, um, good to see you, too.
:Twilight Sparkle: Starlight? What happened?
:Starlight Glimmer: We defeated the changelings with no magic at all, they found a new leader, and... they're all kinda... good now.
:Princess Luna: Well done, Starlight Glimmer. It seems as though you've learned a great deal since we last spoke.
:[rubble moving]
:Queen Chrysalis: [hissing]
:[triumphant music]
:Starlight Glimmer: When Twilight and her friends defeated me, I chose to run away and seek revenge! You don't have to! You can be the leader your subjects deserve.
:[wind rustling]
:[smack!]
:Queen Chrysalis: There is no revenge you could ever conceive of that will come close to what I will exact upon you one day, Starlight Glimmer!
:Princess Celestia: Thorax, as the new leader of the changelings, I look forward to discussing how we can improve our relationship in the future. However, for the moment, perhaps it is best that we leave the Changeling Kingdom to the changelings.
:Discord: Splendid idea! Now who's ready for some celebratory tea at Fluttershy's?!
:Fluttershy: Oh! Uh, everypony?
:Starlight Glimmer: Actually, now that you can snap your claws and send us absolutely anywhere again, I think I have a better option.
:Party Favor: Uh, hey, Starlight. What are you doing here?
:Double Diamond: You left in such a hurry before, we kinda thought you didn't wanna come.
:Starlight Glimmer: Yeah... I guess after the way I used my magic on all of you, I wasn't sure I was somepony who should even be in charge of a baking contest. I was afraid I might go back to being the pony I used to be. But I realize that sometimes you don't have a choice. You have to step up. And I have changed! I can handle it. Whether that means saving Equestria or helping friends out with the Sunset Festival. Speaking of which, I know the Festival's almost over, but I kinda invited a few of my friends to join. Hope that's okay.
:Double Diamond: [laughing] Are you kidding? Of course!
:Starlight Glimmer: Great! Now where's that baking contest? This pony needs a cupcake!
:Discord: So I'm able to rip the very fabric of reality again.
:Trixie: Yeah, yeah. And I'm still a self-absorbed, below-average illusionist, right?
:Discord: Actually, I was going to say a couple of those illusions were slightly above average. If you ever need a little chaos in your act, let me know.
:Trixie: Ha! When pigs fly!
:Discord: Your wish is my command! [snaps]
:Pigasus: [squealing]
:Trixie: Whoa! Whoooooaaaa!
:Rainbow Dash: Somepony is really gonna have to catch us up on what we missed.
:[credits]