The Dorset County Express and Agricultural Gazette. — 1876-04-25 (Dorchester, Dorset, England)

TITERDAY. APRIL M. IBM  NOTES OF THE WEEK.  There are always to be found a lot of idle jabberers glad for any excuse to shirk their legitimate labour, utterly regardless of how bread is to be found for their much enduring wives and their poor pinched children, yet willing to identify themselves with what they call movereent," and ready to connect themselves with the most transparent humbug that ever emanated from the brain of a charlatan. Of such is Kenealy's Magna Charts Auociation composed. When the author of "poems and meditations ! " had exhausted his stumping resources and the Tichborne ladder upon which he had mounted to a fair height of success seemed about to be kicked from under him, when even Whalley's sense of decency was outraged by the ex-barrister, "the leader of the 1 citse" hit upon the dodge of establishing a Charts Association. Probably he borrowed a lesson from Joe Arch; but he has been infinitely more successful. Joe has worked for years to keep his Labourers' Union affair afloat, and his head is but just above water, but "Edward Vaughan," as he smilingly reflects how exemplified the Chief Justice's reference to fools and fanatics has been, knows he has a splendid balance at his banker's.  The ex-Barrister's paper, the Englishman, is so ludicrously comic this week that we cannot refer quoting from it. The Magna Charta Association which found its origin in the Irish ex-Q.C's. imagination consists of a number of F.F.s (that is their own recognised badge) who pay 2d. a week towards the Society, the subscription being devoted to well, perhaps it would be difficult to say what. The great idea, however, of these pot-house politicans is that they will, in a very short space re-organise the order of things, bring about a state of Utopian bliss, unlimited bread and cheese, no rates and taxes, and, above all, all pint measures to hold not less than a quart. This is about Keneady's programme. And now we will just make a few extracts from his paper of the proceedings at one of the meetings at "Doughty hall," the head quarters. "At an early hour," writes Kenealy, "the ladies, who kindly volunteered to adorn the hall, were in attendance." Kenealy, to read his own reports, is always having his hand kilned by lovely women. What does Mrs. K. say 1 "At five o'clock the first service of tea appeared," and it is satisfactory to learn "cake and marmalade was served generously," with the unusual result that "everyone was satisfied." The chair was filled by a Mr. Goss "in the most dignified manner; his colossal appearance and fine proportions giving the proceedings that finish which is said to belong to the King's name,' namely, a Tower of Strength." Several hymns were chanted by the "noble assembly" with "fervour, enthusiasm, and feeling." At eight o'clock Dr. Kenealy entered, bearing whatever it may be, "the Famous Scottish Sceptre, or Rod of Moses." And in the course of his speech he unkindly expressed his willingness to hang his quondam friend Whalley and his adherents with "a rope less than twelve yards long." Marwood had better look to his laurels, or rather his cypress. During the after proceedings the President distinguished himself, to the evident mingled envy and admiration of his audience, by "waving a rich white silk handkerchief over his head." The report concludes with an " important notice" that the secretaries will forward all the monies they hold at once to the head office. That such dupes as the Magna Chartists can exist we almost fail to believe; but be that as it may, we confess our inability to understand the difference between the swindler who advertised a braes steam engine on wheels for Is. 6d., and received five years' penal servitude in which to meditate upon his unappreciated genius, and the fellow who draws 2d. a week from the pockets of simpletons for an object that he knows is as utterly impossible as un voyage dams in tune.  Poor Father O'Keefte has been reduced to such a state of feebleness by the persecutions of his Ultramontane co-religionists that he has in the most abject terms asked Cardinal Cullen to intervene in his behalf. But the Cardinal has no mercy for heritics. He does not even answer the letter, and Father O'Keefle lives in Callan on the verge of starvation. His position is a blot upon the shield of Irish justice, for there certainly must exist means of repairing the mischief done by the Irish hierarchy. The latter have now taken another step which is not unlikely to have serious results for Father O'Keefe. Fourteen of the mob which wrecked his house were sintenced to five months' imprisonment. That term is now up. Bishop Morgan has just returned at Kilkenny from Rome, and has brought over fourteen small crucifixes blessed by the Pope, and any amount of iadulgencies, for the fourteen rioters convicted of the wrecking. They are very proud of the trinkets, which they no doubt regard both as a solatium for past sufferings and encouragement to again violate the law of the land at the very first opportunity. Father O'Keeffe now dreads assassivation as well as starvation. Perhaps there will be an inquiry into the ease when he has fallen a victim to one or the other.  The leisurely pace with which the London Press collect news would distress an interprising provincial editor, and drive a New York newspaper proprietor mad. Lord Lyttleton's suicide occurred on Tuesday, and yet it was not until Friday morning that the Press reported it. There was no intention apparently on the part of the family to hush it up; but it seems to have occurred to no one to report either the accident which occurred on Tuesday or the death which followed on Wednesday until the coroner's jury was empanneled on Thursday, so that in this circuitous way the public learn the distressing event only on Friday. This lagging of the London Press is only surpassed by the way an which Lord Macaulay's death, which occurred at Kensington, was only known at Printing House-square Ft hours after the event. This is enough to make Rip Van Winkle turn in his grave.  Pansrrive Marnoniar. —The friends of this cause have secured the services of Mr. Wooldridge, an evangelist, who is preaching in their chapel every evening this week. The services commenoed on Sunday, on which day three open air meetings held, in addition to the usual services in the c