The Central Glamorgan Gazette, and General, Commercial, and Agricultural Advertiser. — 1879-04-04 (Bridgend, Mid Glamorgan, Wales)

DIGISTION.—The late Duke of Cumberland, being once in company with Foote, was so delighted with the wit of the player that he said, "Mr, Foote, I swallow all the good things you say." "Do you ?" replied Foote. "Then your Royal Highness has an excellent digestion." "What a traveller you have become!" exclaimed a New Yorker on meeting a political acquaintance in Cairo. "Well, yes and to tell you the truth." was the frank reply, "I am obliged to run about the world to keep ahead of my character, for the moment it overtakes me I am ruined."  A lover wrote a poem descriptive of his sweetheart for the village paper, and in it occurred this line:—  Oh, she is lovely, she is rosy ! The printer put it— Oh. she's slovenly, she is nosy! The engagement was broken off. "Don't you think, my dear," said a husband to his wife, as they were walking home from a public meeting, " that the close of Mr.—'s speech was very fine?" "I don't know about the close of anybdody's speech," responded the wife, "but I do think that the clothes of Mrs. Golddust were the finest I ever saw."  At the "earnest request" of several young men, a Missouri paper publishes the following bit of information:—" 'I here is nothing so tends to shorten the lives of old people and to injure their health as the practice of -itting up late, especially winter evenings, and more especially when there is a grown-up daughter in the family."  An enthused poet has lately published a lengthy poem telling all about " How we kissed each other by the sea.' A Western editor asks: " What of it? The seaside is no better place for such practice than any other. We've put in some very sweet work of that kind on the towpath of a canal, and didn't rush into print about it afterwards."  A young man who bad spent a little of his own time and a good deal of his father's money in preparing for the bar was asked, after his examination, how he had succeeded. "Oh, well," said be, "I answered one question right." " Ah, indeed," said the old gentleman, with a look of paternal satisfaclion at his son's smartness; " and what was that ?" "They asked me what a qui tam action was." "That was a hard question! And you answered it correctly, did you P" " Yes, I told them I did clot know."  A bothered jury is responsible for "We find the prisoners not guilty, but believe they took the purk !" a verdict matched by a Carlisle jury which round a watch-stealer guilty, but recommended him to mercy because it was really hard to as whether he had taken the watch or not. An Irish jury recommended a man to mercy on the ground that he had no recollection of the transaction; and s Devonshire foreman, who, upon being asked why II convicted person was recommended to mercy, replied, Because it is an aggravated 060. MY-krd 1"  James Simms, an American seaman, was executed in Newgate on Monday for the murder of a prostitute named Graham, in Shadwell, last January. The convict had no friends in England, and no one has asked to see him since his conviction except the Consul. He walked firmly to the scaffold, and after the rope was round his neck he thanked the Governor and prison officials for the kindness they had shown him. The convict died apparently without a struggle.  A very large meeting was held at Exeter Hall, London, on Monday, 11 the Catholic Total Absti. nence League, of which Cardinal Manning is president. Lord O'Hagan was chairman, and received an ovation. The hall was crowded, and several local organisations attended with bands and banners. The first resolution, pronouncing against intemperatioe as a national evil, was pro. posed by the O'Conor Don, M.P., seconded by Mr. Arthur Moore, M.P. The second, favonring total abstinence as a safeguard and example, was proposed by Father Marnane, seconded by Mr. Sullivan. M.P.  A Ilaiket Train %ill leave Pridatnd for lisertcp at 8.0 p.m on Saturdays only, arriving at Maintop at 8.88 p.m.