Widnes Examiner. — 1888-08-04 (Widnes, Cheshire, England)

TOUCH AND GO."  The 319Jermotts and 'the Connollys, of St. Helens, have been enjoying themselves; there has been quite a series of faction fights—a regular "spree." It 'has been a case of "Row, brothers, "sail on," my "bhoys," &id "paddle your own canoe."  There is a story going the rounds that an inllabitant of Finland, who had Ted an ungodly life, has bequeathed all his landed property and possessions to the devil. It is to be hoped his Majesty will go and take possession of his estate—and stop there.  The people of St. Helens are not likely to be short of •either glass or water. They manufacture one; and have taken to pumping the other very vigorously. This week the foundation stone was laid of new engine-house and boiler-houses at their Kirkby pumping station. They are taking time by the forelock, and water by "main" force.  The Parnell Commission Bill was carried through the House of Commons between one and two o'clock on Friday morning by means of the closure. Last evening Mr. Smith intimated that he expected to take the third reading on Tuesday. The earliest day on which the adjournment for the holidays can take place is Monday week.  A London correspondent says :—"The 14th of August is now montioned as the probalile date of the adjournment. The Government cling to the hope that they may get up on the 11th, but, as usual, Ministers are too sanguine." We are not so sure about that. "The Twelfth" is a sacred day; the House and the Grouse usually rise together.,  The authors of the Greenways' Bank frauds met their deserts, at the Warwick Assizes, on Tuesday. Kelynge Greenway was sent to gaol, for twelve months, and the other brother, G. T. Greenway, was sentenced to five years' penal servitude. The punishment is great, but their grimes were great; and what misery they have caused amongst those who trusted them not wisely, but too well. I  Whilst a Haydock collier was enjoying himself in a boxing booth at Newton races, some one gave him what was called "a tip on`the jaw," while a friend of the " tipper " relieved the miner of his money. However, the collier was sharp enough to seize his man, and hold him till a constable came on the scene. "The straight tip" was given the thief on Wednesday morning; it was two months in gaol, with hard labour.  The Bands in Bank Park are patronised, but not supported, by the public. One evening the total .contribution on the ground amounted to 4d.; another night it was less still-2d! Would it kill anybedy if the Town Council were to vote something for the bands? It would be as legitimate as finding money for antiquarian research at Friars Green; and the outcome would certainly be as interesting.  , "Older and madder." The nuchess of Montrose; aged 70 years has just been married to her third husband—Mr. Marcus Milner, aged 24 years. But what a world of faults and ugliness  Lies hidden in five hundred pound's a year. Not that a Duchess is ever either faulty or ugly; but make it "five thousand,- and the youthful Marcus will dote on a lady old enough to be his great grandmother.  It is reported that the convict Jackson, who is lying under sentence of death in Strangeways Gaol spends a great deal of his time in reading the Bible and religious literature which is provided for him. Some time also he appears to spend in meditation, and it may be, the chaplaiii thinks, in penitence." All this, of course, sounds very well, but the public might with advantage be spared the de-. tails of the way in whkch murderers are supposed to blossom into saints; it is unwholesome—not to say demoralising.  It is stated that a German chemist, Professor I Baumann, has hit upon a sleep-giving substance, which is said to be absolutely efficacious. "It is the product of ethyhneroaptan combined with acetone.' It is said to be absolutely harmless, though the name does seem a fearsome thing. Sancho Panza blessed him that first invented sleep, and there are millions who will bless Baumann if he has really succeeded; for --sleep, it is a gentle thing, , Beloved from pole to pole.  Two Widnes pensioners were brought before Mr. Justice Stephen, on Tuesday. One was sentenced to ten months' imprisonment for robbery; and the other to ten months' imprisonment for a terrible assault on his wife. In each case, the sentence was without hard labour," and this was because