The Central Glamorgan Gazette, and General, Commercial, and Agricultural Advertiser. — 1872-03-01 (Bridgend, Mid Glamorgan, Wales)

WIFE'S MOTHER.  He stood on his head on the wild sea shore, And danced on his hands a jig; In all his emotions as never before, A madly hilarious grig. And why! In the vessel which left the bay His motherin.law had sailed To a tropical country some distance away, Where tigers and serpents prevailed. He knew she had gone to recruit her health And doctor her rasping cough, But waged himself a profusion of wealth That eimethiag would carry her oil. Oh, now he might look fora quiet life, And even be happy yet, Though owning no end of neuralgical wife, And up to his collar in debt. For she of the specs and curled frant bJast, And the black alpaca robe, Must pick out a sailor to suffer the brunt  Of her next daily trial of Job. lie watched while the vessel cut the sea, And bumpingly upped awl downed, Aid thong it if alresdy oh qualm sh coil,! be He'd consider the edifice crowned. He'd borne the old lady through thick and thin, Till she lectured him out of breath ; And now as he gazed at the ship she was in, He howld for her violent death. Till over the azure horizon's edge The lekrk had retired from view. When he leaped to the crest of a chalky ledge, And pranced like a kangaroo. And many a jubilant peal he sent O'er the waves which had made him free, Then cut is last caper extatic, and went Turning somersaults homeward to tea.  A. reporter tells haw he got into trouble with the Rev. Dr, Madge of his place as follows :--it do. vglved upon him to write for the same edition an account of the presentation of a gold-headed cane to Dr. Mudge, and the description of a p.stenthog.killing and sausage machine which bed just been put in operation at the factory. Now, what made Dr. hludge mad was this : The printer who made up the forms of the paper got the two locals mixed up in a frightful manner. and when it went to press, something like this was the appalling result. "Several of the Rev. Dr. hludge's friends milled upon him yesterday, and after a brief conversation the unsuspicious hog uas seized by the hind legs and slid along a beam until he reached the hot water tank. His friends explained the object of their visit, and presented him with a very hand• some gold-headed butcher, who grabbed him by the tuil, swung him around, split his throat from , ear to ear, and in less than a minute the carcass was in the water. Thereupon he came forward and skid that there were times when the feelings ore.. powered one, and for that reeeen he would not at tempt to do more than thank those around him for the manner in which such a huge animal was talk up into fragments and worked up into delicious  sausage. The occasion will long be remembered by the doctor's friends as one of the most delightful of their lives. The best piece can be procured for fifteen cents a pound, and we are sure that those who have sat so long under his ministry will rejoice that he has been treated so handsomely."  Politically we expect lively times at the next general election—your garotting and murdering month in England—November, Philadelphia is the chosen rendezratai of the National Convention. We count with sound figures on General Grant being again nominated and elected as our President, although very influential Republicans object as being subversive of the One Term principle. But we can elect him, and the idea of a people like the citizens of America tying themselves down to De narrow and unreasonable i scheme as "One Term," tyranny will not be generally entertained. Brigham Young is in the hands of justice, but perfectly