The Herald of Wales. — 1888-09-29 (Swansea, West Glamorgan, Wales)

FROM BOOKS.  OR0813111191•LND BOCIPOW DOWEL'  --A laird rent his Sootch butler to me one evening to make inquir i.e respecting my entertaintment. The Miller, an elderly, pompons, and exceedingly stupid men, produeed a piece of note-paper containing • string of questions which he was instructed to ask me. The first question was: "Can Mr. Grommith give an entertainment at Aberdeen on Jan.—?" I replied that in. nightly engagement iet the theatre would totally prevent soy accepting an mgagement at Aberdeen. I could only sing at aften...son parties in town, or a short distance from it. The butler, with a broad Scotch accent, which I need not imitate here, said: "Yell have the goodness to answer this question, please. 'Can Mr. Grosamith give an entertainment at Aberdeen on Jan.---? '" " No; I cannot," I replied. The butler continued reading: " WheA will be his terms? ' " "But I cannot go," I argued. "Yell save a deal o' time if ye'li answer the questions, please : 'What'll be the terms?'" "Well, we will say a hundred guineas,as I can't go,". I answ€rad, endeavouring to restrain myself from bursting out laughing in his face. The butler made • note of the terms, and continued :" 'Will the entertainment be consistent?'" " What?" I ejaculated. " ' Will the entertainment be consistent ? " "Consistent ? For the life of me, I could not see what he meant. "Yes—consistent." I thought a little, and then said: "Would you kindly explain the question? I do not understand it in the least." The butler said: "Well, you roust know, the laird is a strict Presbyterian, and all the guests will be strict Presbyterians, and he wants to know if your entertainment will be consistent." "Now I understand you," I replied. "Certainly, my entertainment will be quite consistent.. lam always very careful, and shall only sing Presbyterian comic songs." He made a note of my remark in the most serious way and left, saying:" The laird himself will write to say ifte can accept the berme." That occurred nearly ten yearn ago, and the laird hal not written yet.— Society Clown. By George Grossmith.  DIVIIIILTION EXTRAORDINARY, Lady Blessington, having been made aware of the estrivordinary aptitude for divination possessed by Mdlle. le Normand, begged her at the close of the evening to give a sample of her powers. She demurred at first, but on being strongly urged, consented to tell three fortunes. Lady Blessingten brought three gentlemen to her in succession. To the first she said: "Your life will be a lucky and a happy one ; you will die old and without pain. On one occasion you and one of your children will miraculously escape destruction.' To the second she spoke as follows : "It seems incredible, but I would address you in the words of Shakepere : 'Thou shalt be king Yes, sir, you will reign." But after gazing in the palm of the third, the young girl grew deadly pale, shivered, and dropped the hand she held. Recovering herself with an effort, she said hurriedly: "I see nothing worth recording in your hand," and drew back. However, before leaving the house that night she asked to see Lady Blessingtou alone, and implored her to beware of that thin( stranger. and not receive him any more. "H. will commit murder," she added, shuddenngly, "and be sentenced to death." The test of the three men was Charles Dickens, who in 1864,returning from abroad, was in the terrible railway accident of Staplehurst, and escaped unhurt; afterwards the MS. of "Our Mutual Friend," the child of his brain, was found in a little handbag among the def.ris and miraculously returned to him unarmed. The second man was Prince Louis Napoleon, who had not long before made his escape front the Fortress of Ham in the disguiee of a workman, gained the Belgian frontier with the assistance pf Doctor Conneau, and taken refuge in England. The third was Charles Wainwright, then a promising painter, who ended by killing his wife under circumstances of revolting eruelty ; he was condemned to death, but his sentence was commuted to imprisonment for life.—Ratideet Recollections of Court and Society. By a Cosmopolitan.