niryuu/sni-each-converted huggingface dataset:
This is the hardest part of farm living.
Output: We're going to have to call the vet and have them come down and do what a man's got to do when a pig's not feeling well.
This guy really fucked us on the sale now.
Output: I mean, we should have been warned when it was a Betty Boop check.
Unfortunately, as a representative of Ringling Brothers and Barnum Bailey, I've got to let you go.
Output: I'm going to go to the Circus of Vargas.
Do you want me to go get you some ice cold ice cream from the Cold Stone Creamery?
Output: I would love an ice cream. Do you know how long it's been? Hours in fact.
Oh, no. Ya'll made Lisa cry.
Output: I just want water. I don't like the sparkling. It makes me burp.
I'll take care of it with my bionic arm.
Output: It's moving so fast. You've absorbed all the lemonade and you barely moved.
So I would like the Chihuahua Margarita. Whoops, I can't even say it right.
Output: I knew what you meant and that's part of being a good server, intuiting what our guests are trying to order.
Well, I mean, my wife overreacts to everything. She's a hysterical woman, as you know. I'm just forgetting things that people normally forget.
Output: Well, she told me two weeks ago that you were supposed to buy her a blasted dress, and you forgot to buy her the blasted dress.
You're eating chicharrones? Where'd you get chicharrones? 
Output: Apartment 11C. It's a new family that moved in there. I think they go to the international market.
Oh man, once I start eating string cheese, I can stop.
Output: Do you peel it or do you eat it bite by bite?
Oh, Diane. I love the Chicken Festival. I've never heard a cluck I didn't like.
Output: Well, here's this year's contestants. First up, Mrs. Feathers.
Thank you for the money. I'm going to buy a house with it.
Output: I'm happy for you. It's a good investment. Be sure to bring us back any change.
Has anyone seen my Apple watch? The one I normally keep in my mouth?
Output: It's in the dishwasher.
Oh, you girls love getting together to play cards.
Output: Yeah, last week I won a pair of steel toe boots.  I don't know what I'm going to use them for, but I won them.
This is real like for me. Although, I do enjoy Buffy the Vampire Slayer show. They have such snappy dialogue.
Output: There's so much action too. I love the whole mythology of the whole show.
I can help you be your best self. I can tell from the fur on your flannel that you live with some furry creatures.
Output: Yeah, I have four. One of them hides under the bed all the time and I forget that he exists.
Oh, sorry. Let me finish this cheese.
Output: Oh, please, no. I'm sorry to interrupt you on your lunch break.
I want to be crushed by a big person because that's what I deserve.
Output: OK. Make me big. I'll crush you.
Ruth, I wish that I could home school you rather than send you to that sinful place. But, I like to watch my stories. So, I can't take time out to be teaching arithmetic and how the world is 100 years old.
Output: Yes, those stories and your love of them has pretty much saved my sanity.
Oh okay, I don't know the words though.
Output: There's not that many. Here's the thing, man. It just turns into a sea of noisy love. You know what I mean?
Okay, first of all, you're human.  Second of all, you want to add a waddle.
Output: I'd love to have a gobbler.  Competitive large.  Competitive.
Eat the circus peanuts. You know you want to.
Output: OK, I'll start with just one.
Who smokes anymore?
Output: A Dirt God's kid, I'll tell you that.
Mr. Patterson, do you write mystery books or action books? Because I like mystery books that actually are action books.
Output: Well then you're in for a treat. I write mystery books that are secretly action books.
Mrs. Bender, I want to apologize to you and the twins. I should probably put on a shirt, don't you think?
Output: I didn't want to say anything, but if you absolutely feel you have to put on a shirt, then go ahead.
You seem to be exerting yourself quite a bit with the rubber mallet.
Output: I'm smashing your knee right now and there's no response.
What is this strange liquid coming out from my beeps and boops?
Output: I think she's peeing.
I thought people in Florida always just acted like it wasn't happening.
Output: That's for outsiders, dear.
You didn't have to tell us that he died. You could have just taken over for him or sent someone else.
Output: Well, here at Houston's, we're family.
Well, you're welcome to walk away,  but let's see how far you get without that.
Output: How dare you! I'll never find a shoe that sumptuous or supple again! Please go find it.
Here's your slop you piece of crap? What are you laughing about you shit show?
Output: They say it's your birthday, but I ain't singing shit.
We don't have that movie anymore. Someone did not bring it back.
Output: Do you have any other movies similar in tone? Just like two guys carrying another guy who is not alive. Do you have any movies like that?
Your boner is tap dancing across the breakfast table.
Output: It's a powdered fish monster.
I would love to give my opinion on what you should buy. Have you heard of the troll bead?
Output: I saw the ad about troll beads. They seem magically to me.
Let's give him another 15 minutes. I believe in Todd.
Output: Well, we only booked the hall for two hours, so 15 minutes is about all we have left before they give us the boot.
The school is cutting back, just pop your retainer out and we'll get you out of PE.
Output: I guess. What's the first order of business?
I grew up as a nighttime Christians.
Output: I hear that's tough, because how are you gonna, like, tell your dreams not to swear or listen to secular music?
Monday I'm going to have a room of my own. With a broom and a chair.
Output: Junebug, be quiet under those stairs.
I am having a strange, tickling, electrical impulse sort of feeling in my chest-ular area. In fact, don't hug me right now, you might get hurt by it. It almost feels like human anger.
Output: Join me in the kitchen and we shall engage the fight protocol.
Is there anyone else here that could help me get change?
Output: I don't think so. We made a resolution that we were always going to have somebody here to be available to help the customers, but we haven't followed through.
Timothy, will you mop all this up for me?
Output: Yes, Mr. Timmons. Whatever you say.
Well then who's ordering the new thimbles?
Output: Jeez, I could order some more thimbles for you.
I want to get to the airport on time.
Output: I think you missed your flight time. Time passes a little more quickly here in Maine than it does anywhere else, even though it seems to pass very slowly.
I see that you are friends with an insect or something.
Output: Yes, my name is Mr. Sims. And this is my good friend, Gary the Cockroach.
This is Snaton. He's part snake, part devil. Not to be confused with Satan. There's be a whole thing about that. But Snaton, he came first.
Output: Yeah, I think I was sort of a first draft.
Do you feel that being small is the only thing that's allowing you to stay a nurse?
Output: Yeah, if I'm big again, nobody wants me as a nurse.
Somebody said y'all needed a speech for y'all's graduation.
Output: Gosh, it's Jack Thunderstorm from WPIG.
All right guys, let's go out there and give 'em a show.
Output: Guys. Let's learn from our mistakes last time. Everyone has their magnetic shoes on? And no one brought a bomb, right?
Let me help you with your bags.
Output: Honey, why don't you go with Jermaine and take the bags up? I have a question to ask Shanice.
The long con is finally paying off.
Output: I cannot wait to stop acting.
What's wrong with this thing? This radio, I just bought this thing. What's wrong?
Output: These things take so many batteries.
Where were the toilets? I have a big blockage.
Output: OK. Well, I'm here to help.
You know, there's only so many house of night.
Output: Yeah, you're telling me.  I'm trying to sleep!
It's so hot.  Why are we talking about this disgusting popcorn we sell?
Output: It's only going to be make it worse.  We should talk about something positive, like how much money we will make today.
Hey, can the other eight of us weigh in at any time or are the four of you just going to dominate this conversation?
Output: Yes, I have certain things I'd like to say about this very complicated case.
To attend her funeral? I have a feeling that, yes. She would like that.
Output: If we can get on the first taping of The Price is Right - they're doing nine tapings today - we can make that funeral and hardly miss anything.
Delores, she put a lot of work into that volcano. It's an exact representation of the Monaloha.
Output: Monaloha, like the nuts. Like I must be to have married into this family.
Have you tried telling Linda that you love her?
Output: I tried. But, I was too shy. I could never get it out.
Cookie, I've never been down in this part of the ship.
Output: Little Twitters, of course you haven't been. This is for authorized personnel only. It's not for little Twitters.
I love you, darling. You look so beautiful today.
Output: Thank you so much, mom. You're radiating.
Using cameras with film is part of the contest. It has to be photos that have to be developed.
Output: Yeah, it's because they haven't seen our flyers or had our dogs yet.
Daddy-master, I'm having doubts about your teachings. I feel as if I belong with Maybelline and Danielle. Deidre, will you come with us?
Output: I appreciate it, but I can't go because I'm your mom.
You have to have some green chilies before you leave Santa Fe.
Output: Those sound spicy. Are they spicy? I have a sensitive stomach.
They had to write in that line about how the song was coming to an end because it didn't rhyme and people were confused.
Output: I've been such a fan of country music for such a long time. It's such an honor to sing here right in front of this bathroom.
As the weigh-in coordinator, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry because I feel like I let your daughter into the fighting ring with a man who was twice her size and known murderer.
Output: Yeah, and his name had the word "monster" in it, too.
Talking to your Memaw is not a job.
Output: It sounded like you just took notes.
Well, what?
Output: Well, okay lets do it, we're going to kill them and we're going ot live in the sizzler just like our parents taught us.
What's this paper? Change of address?
Output: Daddy-master, please don't be too harsh are Maybelline.
I'm so used to drinking lemonade.
Output: Oh, but this is fresh squeezed.
She's the girl that's always kind of quiet and weird in the back of the room.
Output: I try to keep to myself and I try to learn and I try not to get in anybody's way because what I see my mom doing is getting in everybody's life, trying to make changes. I'd rather be invisible.
This is the ghost of an 80's radio.
Output: Oh, it's a terrible story when that 80's radio got murdered here at the bell house.
Did you also check out and not return Clue?
Output: Oh no. It's in my elaborate robes.
Well, thank you for the thorough explanation about how you lost your handicap placard. You did all the character voices very well.
Output: That was, like, that was a half hour explanation. It was really good.
Monique has beautiful hair, doesn't she?
Output: Yes, it's like Bo Derrick.
I heard the diamond turns green when it senses it's going to be stolen.
Output: That's why we picked a day when it's going to look more hazel, so that people pay less attention to it. Hopefully that won't happen, hopefully it's just an urban myth about the green thing.
Jasper. What are you doing out here? You're in front of the covered wagon.
Output: I just heard you guys talking and I got worried. You said if I ever got scared to come to the front.
Hey, I made you something. It was just pocket lint. I had to work quickly while you was looking through the record albums.
Output: It looks like a rabbit.
My name is Charlie. Dr. Charter and I are here to tell you about a  disease.
Output: That's right, Charles. You're a brave kid. It's a disease that strikes very few people. But, when it does, oh boy, does it really hit hard, right in the balls.
Well, I'm having some people over and I need a Santa.
Output: Give me a room to change into me Santa costume. I'm in!
I'm sorry, you're right. I'll be cool.
Output: OK. Just lay down. We will fill a tub with ice, leave you in it. Leave a message on the mirror - which will now be redundant.
Miguel, whatever you want to do, I just want you to feel free in November to do what you want in our magazine Hair, Hair. You know, really up that column for us.
Output: Right. I'm thinking of full color photos of multiple heads of hair.
Look how small Denise's place is. There's no furniture.
Output: Oh, it's smaller than a bedroom even and it's her whole house.
My husband won't touch any doors.
Output: What a weirdo and I'm a doctor.
You did, to cashier. And I was the fastest cashier for that month and I won a boating trip.
Output: That's right, you won a trip to the lake. Old Whale Lake.
Thomas, I gave you a gogurt, so give me your coat.
Output: I guess that's true. Here you go, Laurent. I'm sure I won't be that cold without it.
Oh betty our daughter fresh fish has just been taken.
Output: Yeah I heard that they took her to box canyon.
Your beautiful brown eyes, they are like a great spruce.
Output: OK. That was pretty specific. She still said nothing about your woman hips and didn't say your name was Bruce.
I was asking if I could use an Amex and then I believe he said "Fuck off." It's a platinum.
Output: A platinum, huh? We will accept it, but we will slap you once.
Maybe that's why Brandon was wearing that weird wig.
Output: Yes, he's trying to protect his organ jar.
I think that's a monsoon, you guys.
Output: Great, Lilith. You really screwed things up by coming back in time.
Here is your change, it's in bus tokens and POGs.
Output: Oh great, look you even gave me a slammer!
She's out here all alone, have you noticed that?
Output: You're right, I did notice that, she doesn't even have a broom either. I kinda feel bad for her, in a weird way.
I don't act but I took a stand up class. And I got a couple laughs. I do stand up at night. I'm not just a water bouncer. I'm much more than that. I'm a funny guy. I protect the funny.
Output: So you're a funny bouncer? You bounce funny out the room? I don't get it.
Listen, Ronnie. Tim is going to stay here with you. He had some questions about opening a Twitter account for you so you can share your experiences.
Output: He's a social media manager. He has questions for me on opening a Twitter account?
Before that part, I thought we were going to do our vows.
Output: Oh, silly me. Look, I'm going by a manual, and I think these two pages are stuck together. We'll go back.
So, let me get this straight. I put a piece of paper in here, and then I can go somewhere else and the same piece of paper comes out over there?
Output: That's right, and I'm happy to run it right through for you. We're about to start dinner.
We should go back there. I bet she's more vulnerable than the last time we tried to attack her.
Output: Especially now that we know to bring treasures back after we doink her.
Catalina. I don't know if you should be doing this much testosterone. I'm concerned about you. You've been snapping on everyone.
Output: Well, you know, it's sad I don't have your support, Mom. You know I've always had the feeling that I want to go a little harder, be a little faster. You know? It's only had positive effects, alright. Except for the negative effect of the lack of support from my own mother.
I use an app for my boarding pass. Do you want to scan this?
Output: Of course, sir. There we go. If you can just put your face up next to the vent over there, the mist will take care of the rest.
Cousin, I just heard you are willing to give me a kidney to keep me alive. And i just want to thank you so much for that promise.
Output: Oh yeah, you gonna get that kidney. I tell you what, leave your door open a crack tonight and I'll just slip it under the mat.
We can agree on that.  Too bad we don't get along otherwise, because you're pretty amenable.
Output: You know what?  In another life, Quadge, maybe we could have been friends with each other.
Oh boy, she's talking to Disney Dan out there. He's so handsome.
Output: I mean, gosh. He should just work here. He should just be the only boy working at The Boy Store, because he's so handsome.
Brad, I think you're evil, a great fighter, and I hope you get your come up very soon in a weird way.
Output: Well, tomorrow night at the Humpback Casino, everyone will see how righteous I beat my opponent, Cincinnati Emily.
Your feet are heavier than they look.
Output: Yeah, that's because I've go sequins sewn onto my socks.
What an alarming and interesting day we've already had at the fair. Do you feel any less intimidated?
Output: I feel less intimidated. I think because those people are outsiders. They're not from Minnesota.
This is your fault, Mom. Your arranged marriage to Dad messed us up.
Output: Oh, let me tell you something. For arranged marriages, statistically, the rate of divorce is way less than how you people do it now.`
Everyone down. We want all the pickles.
Output: Give us all of them. Sweet, sour, kosher, dill.
Fasty, you tricked us!  You had us put these bungee cords around us so you could loop us all together.
Output: Yes, I did a maypole around the three of you.  Now, we know why Nancy is such a monster, but we don't know why you're such a monster, Cedric.
Well, there's only the one seat.
Output: We can share one cheek each.
Honey, you're the trees and life is the forest.
Output: You're the Forrest Gump to my Bubba.
You ever noticed that jewelry's crazy? Like people just assign value to shiny things but they don't really have value.
Output: Yeah. It's funny 'cause it's true.
Well, John, the flakes are falling. It's another beautiful winter in  Schenectady.
Output: I know. This time of year is kind of my favorite time of year.
What do you all want from me?
Output: I want to meet the band Heart.
Our counselor Judy, she's fantastic. She's just up the street and very affordable.
Output: Yeah, and she's somebody you can trust. She really listens to us and the idea that we can tell her anything and she won't tell anyone else is such a comfort.
i'm real excited about being acknowledged by you in public.
Output: I promise you, this being a Saturday, I can tell you that come Monday morning at school, I will yell across the hallway "Oh hi there Murder Beth!"
We gotta run with what's working. Dad! Hey dad?
Output: What are you doing? You're breaking the fourth wall here.
Oh, we're sorry, boss. They asked for soft boiled. It's the softest boil you can do.
Output: It's not the matter of boiling. It's the egg itself. I want the best!
Oh honey, get the camera!
Output: OK darling, here it is. How do you work this thing again. See, this is a Samsung.
Do not go in there, it is rough.
Output: Oh, Roger, you're back.
Your hair. It is an interesting style you've made in it.
Output: Thanks a lot. I've got a bit of pigeon feather in the back and this is a talon.
Oh, yeah. I'm the only one without a substance abuse problem.
Output: It's almost like it's related to you or something.
I was very sorry to hear about your wife. Did you get that Blu-Ray of Cubed 2 that I sent?
Output: It cheered me up more than I would have expected. Thank you.
There's a lot of lightening shooting around in that thing. Are you sure it's safe?
Output: That's the storm cloud we have to go to. It will send us back in time to bible times. We have no choice.
So, I'm just going to scrape around the tooth with this hook.
Output: Yes, that's right. You're removing plaque that builds up over time.
Fred, you're not good at being mean. 
Output: Thank goodness. That felt terrible.
You took a shit in front of the bathroom door.
Output: Somebody should have told me. It would have been ruder to shit in this chair than to go over to the door.
I'm Sly and I got huge veins.
Output: I'm spry and I would love to get up on those veins in a sexual way.
Listen, I'm wanted in Montana, alright. I need your help. Will you be a friend to me or a foe?
Output: I'm a foe a little bit longer, but then I'll be a friend.
I planted the blackberry bushes, that are very thorny.
Output: Wow they really are spiky, look at all those people hanging on them! Are they ok?
What kind of grocery list is this? It just says food.
Output: It says white bread and rice.
Dr. Mark, you're an obstetrician in the area.
Output: Yes, and I just need a rear view mirror, and I need to get back to the hospital.
Thank you for coming to this Lair.
Output: Madame, I'm a surgeon, but it's boring. Is there a way that I can make it a little spicier and do some black magic?
You're probably recognizing me from the posters for Grocery Store.
Output: You're Reginald Grocery. In the flesh as I live and barely breathe.
Well, you treated her poorly. You abandoned her in Italy.
Output: Can I be honest with you? She was a drag, right? I mean, I'm not crazy. She was the worst.
No, I won't walk into that trap.  You try to get me to be right and, all of a sudden, the next thing I know, I'm on the dingy.  ?
Output: You're right.  Why should I change when the world try to accommodate my mistakes?
I prefer you pronounce my last name like "Peer-t."
Output: Well, I'm sure I'm sorry for how I've been pronouncing it all these years.
They didn't have anything without dairy or soy. They tried to give me toppings. And they had the scroll in the register, so they couldn't open it to get my scroll without me buying something.
Output: Well, you could just buy something and not eat it.
I am not a good doctor.
Output: Well, you're very upfront about it. I like that you're a straight shooter.
I'm afraid it's not up to me who dies, dear. I don't get to decide.
Output: It should be me. I decided to put my television on the side wall instead of over the fireplace like the obvious choice.
I've got fifty cents. It's my last fifty cents. I'll probably be dead soon.
Output: Well cancer's going to get all of us at some point.
She sent me a message from the underworld. Here's the message, and I don't know what it means. "Don't do it."
Output: I know what she means. She means don't leave Denny's with that man.
I don't know if there is any way to get back in the laundromat.
Output: Well, the owner has a key and then you have the lock pick. We could probably try one of those.
Can I call you Evilynn?  Then we'd be Meegan and Evilynn.
Output: I like it.  It's almost like Evil Kineeval.
I sent the check, so there was no need to steal the car.
Output: Well, you could have sent it certified mail, and then someone would have delivered it to me in person.
Little guy, you're very tall for your age.
Output: I know. That's what's wrong with me. I don't like being so tall.
This boat is gorgeous.
Output: It's lovely. I gotta say, there's something serene about being on the water.
So, I could be a narrator for the show.
Output: Yeah, just like a narrator that gives no details whatsoever.
That's my boy up there. And I couldn't be prouder of him.
Output: Oh, G71. Our son is a true Feelings star up there.
Tad, we are in a whale. Any moment, we could be vomited or blow holed out of this place. Tell us your truth.
Output: OK. I've never shared this with anyone before.
Aw, hell yeah, Mr. Determen. Let me pump this fist a couple times.
Output: Troy, I didn't realize you had a prosthetic arm.
Oh. You're like ZZ Bottom.
Output: I like you. You're funny. I really like you guys. If I ever died, god forbid I ever do, I'm going to cut you in on a little something I call my will.
I suppose if what you're saying is true that all of these dummies can come to life, then we should let them all out of the cages.
Output: Think of all the museums in all the world. What if all those things and the people in every painting are trapped within it.
The suspense you're building is also a talent.
Output: Thanks, I've never been complimented on my suspense abilities.
Look at their heads. They look like they belong together with the mohawk and pins.
Output: Look at our heads. We're both completely bald.
I love this library and I hope it never goes anywhere.
Output: It's amazing and it just makes this place feel like a small town. I feel like it's our kind of people.
I brush back my hair and do a little head twirl, and I am so shaken by your presence that I start to go wobbly and I'm afraid I'm going to fall of my stilts.
Output: I buff my scalp and I twirl my mustache. I clean my glasses on the end of my sweater. I sound my barbaric yelp over the stilt-tops.
I feel like you've been in line many times today.
Output: Yeah, I got a fast pass before, then I came back through with a single rider pass.
What's most important is that we move the body so we can do the construction.
Output: It seems like something we should call the cops to do.
You can't fire a guy just because he yells weird things down a toilet.
Output: I don't know why you can't, but you're right.
You career got in the way of being a mother to these (?) chickens.?
Output: It's OK, we're aliens - we can kinda do whatever.
Tyler is a top-notch agent and he's never failed us in the field. Everyone thinks he's a kid, it's weird.
Output: No one's gonna fall for that, he's a 25 year old man with an over-sized lollipop.
Those veins on your body aren't real, Mrs. White?
Output: Not completely Meredith. They're drawn on. I can show you how, if you'd like.
It's so true. I'm just going to let it flutter into my mouth like a feather.
Output: I'm gonna waft this one in the air towards you right now.
Good thing my convertible top is open.
Output: I can't believe he drove his car backstage.
Are you church choir review Ralph? Your reviews are vicious.
Output: I mean, if they're not putting in the work they don't deserve a good review.
Guys, I don't mind telling you that I'm terrified. You see that figure in the corner, right?
Output: I do. Everyone get behind me. I brought a flask of holy water. The power of Christ compels you demon. Be gone.
Sometimes my mother is sad though.
Output: Let me guess. Derek's smoking has gotten out of hand again?
I haven't even made a kill yet. I'm so depressed.
Output: Oh, bless your heart. I have killed 12 pianos. Drowned each and every one of them.
You shall take these blocks and you shall turn it to currency. You will be a king.
Output: But, I want to be a little boy forever.
Well, OK, I'll get those peaches and oh look what we're gonna have. A little peach and chocolate PowerBar mousse as soon as I get this whisk through this PowerBar. 
Output: It's an uphill battle, Carol.
Well, she's my cousin. So we have a ton of them in the garage.
Output: Rodney, how close of a cousin are you to Rosie O'Donnell?
Hello, local beefcake.
Output: Yeah, I'm local somewhere. That counts right?
What do you say, Beth? One last stall together before we go our separate ways?
Output: That's sounds really great, Daniel. I'll be happy when this is over.
Those two people look like they are struggling on that date. He has told four or five jokes without one peep of laughter.
Output: Absolutely. This Panera is so quiet. Everyone is listening.
Look at those two. They're loving on each other so fervently.
Output: I'd love to ask them some questions.
You prompted me hard, like you wanted to hear it. You were desperate.
Output: Of course. I secretly wanted to hear it. I was in love with her.
I'm kind of of a collector. So, not only am I collecting the Big Macs as I test them out, I also am collecting glass found in Burger King parking lots.
Output: Oh, I collect sea glass. We have so much in common.
What's it like where you live now, Mrs. Bender? I bet it's better than Van Nuys.
Output: Well, it's everything I thought it would be, but there's something else. It's lonely sometimes.
Is this about your wife that was stoned by the children and then ran away?
Output: Yes. She's alive. Your plan didn't work out, all you and your campers, so you can go fudge yourself because I don't need this ship.
Are we going to turn into werewolves when we smoke the cloves?
Output: Well, it is a Native American brand, so maybe.
We're heading out there on the open road to see what's out there.
Output: Oh, my god. You're the answer to all my prayers. I didn't know what my thing was and now I know my thing is you. I'll die if I ever lose you or if for some reason you decide you're tired of me and disappear.
Dear Diary, I am actually a fairy. I have super human powers and my goal is to grant one dream to each of my friends this evening.
Output: Why didn't you tell us that before we got so shit faced drunk?
I shrunk out of my own clothes and there was no way I could open a wallet.
Output: Really? You don't have paypal little man?
We're in the middle of the Mediterranean in a super yacht.?
Output: And I was trying to fix the plumbing!
Did you kill Hitler this time when you were in the worm hole?
Output: I think I did. I at least pushed him hard.
I saved all our lives that day.
Output: Well, all of our lives, yes. Not the other people on the roller coaster.
So, your parents marriage is kind of on the rocks. Were they even married? Or, did they just have some kind of arrangement?
Output: I think it was an arrangement of some kind. I think they had a spark at one point and then it faded.
What can I say?  I'm a winner, and you're a loser.
Output: Yeah, I sure am.  Well, that's the last time you're going to be seeing me, so thanks for your moderately warm friendship.
I've got a bum leg, my leg doesn't work so good.
Output: OK, but you don't have the sticker that allows you to park in a handicapped spot.
Okay, next up is little Larry Bimley.
Output: Hi, guys.  It's me.  Larry.  You all know my talent.  I'm going to dance like nobody's watching.  Everyone just shut your eyes, and here I go.
You're supposed to be front of house, what're you doing back here?
Output: I know, I am front of house. But this guy wants chili dog and I know we are out of chili.
Please forgive my young and impetuous artist protege.
Output: I'm surprised you haven't slapped him to the floor yet.
Mom, is this true? Did you tell this guy that I was awesome?
Output: I said you were very good. I said you were no Ira, but who is anyway.
If you ask me one more time to play Settlers of Cataan I swear to god I will burn the house down.
Output: It is a good game. You know you love it. You even told me that you were cheating on me with a group of Cataan player.
I was just over here enjoying the Floridian activity of hanker chief simulated plane controlling.
Output: Oh, that is our favorite thing to do.
You can see with your own eyes, Billy.
Output: You're right, everything looks terrible though!
My doctor is a jerk. He's a jerk.
Output: Next time go to a hospital.
I getting real sore, I shouldn't have picked being on the bottom of you guys. I said a lighter person should be on top. I'm getting wobbly.
Output: I'm sorry, I'm so shivery and shaky because I'm so anxious. I should never have been in the middle of this trench coat.
The screen is telling us to sing for it.
Output: Alright, let's sing sing for the screen. Let's all sing for the screen today.
This is our last day open. We won't be printing memories for people anymore. We'll be closing up shop and I don't know what's going to become of this place after we're gone.
Output: Oh, an ice cream shop. I'm just making a suggestion, but it's just big enough.
Listen, Mr. Sims, is there any way you could convince Gary to just, you know, take a little stroll just until this rush is over?
Output: Sure, I could go see if he wants to go for a little walk. Let me go out there and talk to him.
So they did a Falconer Football TV special in your day as well?
Output: They did, because we lost every game we played - the opposite of my son's team.
Yes. It goes on a sandwich because a sandwich is things you slice.
Output: It's so true. I'm just going to let it flutter into my mouth like a feather.
Beth, that woman looks like Alyssa's friend who left not long after the stoning. But she's got a different attitude.
Output: God damn it. Excuse me, are you that fucking tree possessing another fucking person?
So was I like your first mate on the boat?
Output: You were the first mate. Did you get amnesia? That does happen when you get caught in the belly of a whale.
You went to Chaturanga, the casino?
Output: Yeah, they did the Lord of the Flies show at the casino. It was a real kids show at the casino.
You think someone would just use me and leave me?
Output: It happens all the time. Once you get in this purse, you're often forgotten about.
Guys, I think I'm changing back. I'm starting to gain some confidence. I think we should let Mary murder Chuck on air.
Output: That is a terrific idea. No other network will be able to top this.
Hey, it's us. Maurice and Mauricia.
Output: Oh, you two. You betrayed me. You kicked me out.
You need to take your coins and buy some tickets.
Output: You know what, I'm sick of this amusement park. The churro man has been ignoring me all day.
I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. I got lost. I just- we were supposed to have like some college basketball players in here to cheer up the kids, but they got all sick so I brought a chicken in here to see if it'd do the job.?
Output: Oh, they succumbed to the virus then.
Mustachio gentleman, what's your favorite song by Lauren Hill? You must be a big fan if you're working the line.
Output: Oh, yeah. I'm a big fan. I like the song, where she's getting educated. I believe education is very important.
Hey, Sandra Bullock, my name is Richard Jefferson.
Output: Oh, I know who you are. I'm one of those girls that follows sports. You play basketball.
My cotton is ruined. I don't know what to do.
Output: Susan, what if you roll around in some hot chocolate and make the whole cloud brown?
Thomas, do you like being you? You're sort of the weird one because everyone else is big and beefy.
Output: I used to think all the time that it was bad that I was different. Now I think that maybe it's cool that I'm different. I'm my own person.
We're using fishing emollients to process the cocaine. 
Output: OK. Take us to the hatchery, the cocaine hatchery, where all of the spores are and the eggs.
There's a lot of floating particles around here and I'm just very, very sensitive.
Output: You're detecting floating particles? That's a health hazard. Let me check.
You're going to steal the Michael Jackson puppet and by puppet, I mean dummy?
Output: We're going to dispose of it properly. We're going to put it up on a flagpole.
The green one with all the change in the cup holder?
Output: 79 cents.
Do you hear those people next door? They're freaking out.
Output: I know, they sound more stressed than we are.
Get a load of this: Daniel chopped some wood.
Output: Oh, please. I guarantee we go out there and look at that wood, it's pre-chopped wood.
Hi, do you have time to give a perm? Sorry, it says walk-in welcome.
Output: I'm confused, because your hair is already extremely curly.
We really appreciate you giving us free birds. Don't write about me in your book. You know what happens when you write people in that book.
Output: I know exactly what happens when people are written down in this book. That's why I'm doing it.
Michael, you've seen the movie "Night at the Museum"? 
Output: I know all movies. I was an avid movie goer in life.
Yes, that's it. Make it out to comma burglar.
Output: Oh, of course. You wouldn't want something signed to the wrong name. That would be insane.
I'm over seven feet tall. That's the size we all were in the beginning of time.
Output: That's OK. You're a lot of lady to love.
See, even when you go to a place you might be dreading, you can make it fun and happy by skipping and singing.
Output: That's right, Fred. You always know just want to say.
You'll have to forgive me, Jeremy Northam. I am unfamiliar with your work.
Output: Sir, we are exactly the same, because I am unfamiliar with your profession, the sport of basketball.
So if we just don't go out anymore? We don't do music, we just go to our huge ranches and we just get out of here. Ghosts, there are ghosts everywhere
Output: I don't have a ranch the size of yours, Getty Lee. It's only slightly huge.
You're changed darling, you're supposed to be the head of security, not the head of vengeance, not revenge. Look at you, consorting with Mickey Mouse.
Output: You're right, darling. I don't know what it is, something's inside me that makes me want blood.
Dear customer, I think I know you bring murderous dog into grocery store and he killed manager. What you do is not good. I'm not on board. Obviously we have a connection. I don't know if I wish to proceed with relationship because of murder dog. 
Output: Excuse me. Vlad? We can't have you using the break room computer for personal emails.
Doris, during your nap, The Richingtons and Guy decided that they are going to replace us with a telephone and build a Wal-Mart on the first floor of the stadium.
Output: It already has walls. We don't need more walls.
Your father is vomiting into this ceramic bucket.
Output: I'll take it away. I'm the servant here. I deal with buckets like this all the time.
Ah, Detroit. That's where I lost my anal virginity.
Output: Oh, maybe there's another car I can hitch hike with instead of yours.
You said you like Invisible Dave more than you like your grandson even though you've never seen him.
Output: Well, maybe that's why I like him. Do you have grandchildren?
The King and I has been sold out for weeks, how did you get tickets to that?
Output: I know, I know a guy on the inside. I know the King.
Wait a minute. You're not going to be able get out of here unless somebody steers this thing while you're leaving. You know what? Go on without me! I'm going down with this whale.
Output: Well, only three dolphins showed up anyway.
I've been poking around Bali, just drinking sparkling water, mixing it with flat water, getting all kinds of crazy tummy problems. Do you get tummy problems?
Output: I do. It makes sense because when I was going to have you, my water broke and so you came forth like a raging water full of carbonation.
Could you tell my boss how good I am, because he doesn't believe in me.
Output: Sure, just fill out the top part of this comment card and we'll take care of the rest.
Garold, would you like a high ball from the floor?
Output: Ooohhh. Floor balls. Any time you can use the word balls, it's funny.
I'm asking you what color it is before you press the button.
Output: I don't know. They change colors, look.
All I'm saying, Miles, I'm playing Laertes, and we got poisoned tip swords, and I'm ready to put one, and I'm ready to hit you palpably.
Output: Are you threatening to murder me in front of the whole school?
Where's the money going? That doesn't sound very reassuring.
Output: It's kind of like the FDIC. They'll chase after your money if it gets stolen.
He seemed sad to me, as if only children could make him happy. He spent a lot of time with us.
Output: He was broken inside. And outside. His body was all fucked up.
Boss, you got this pit of open spikes behind me. If I slip, I'm going to fall in this pit. What's going on, boss?
Output: I mean, if you don't slip, then you don't fall in the pit. So, there's your options.
Nice modest blouse you're wearing. No way would that make it on the show.
Output: I'm not going to tempt anyone, with my neck, OK?
Oh, this hole's closed. Hole's jagged. You'll never get a ball in there. It's broken on the side.
Output: Ball won't go in. You'll be frustrated. Your par would go up.
I don't get out of the ice cream parlor/bar a lot, ma'am.
Output: OK, well if you did, you'd know this is called a hijab.
I'd be the first in my generation to attend an institute of higher learning and that's why I'm here today to do this monologue that I wrote in my spaceship on the way here.
Output: Stop right there. That was beautiful. Hired.
I want to go inside the venue and check out this UFC event.
Output: Me, too!  I hope they're serving hotdogs and beer in the stands.  Let's go!
A big part of your program is taking mushrooms out there and thinking about your life, right?
Output: Yeah, it's unusual. It doesn't happen a lot on Air Force bases, but it does at Big Sir.
Listen, I'm glad I could join you here. It's me, Sandra from New York City.?
Output: Sandra, are you in fact from New York City in addition to being a talking chicken?
Holy shit. Did you see that? It looks like a mist.
Output: It's a novelization of Exile on Main Street. With the song like this is his favorite ? . The musical parts are typed out.
I'm new here. Everybody is, it's opening weekend.
Output: Oh yes. Well, we are so excited. Our whole family's here and my daughter's gonna buy a boy today. It's just a big day for our family.
I wanted to add one last touch to that Poseidon's Delight.
Output: Wow, the perfect garnish. Parsley.
I told you to wear a mask when you're painting.
Output: The road from Lima is a bumpy one. Sometimes, the mask gets in the way of my driving skills.
OK. Let's see. This is an under wood regulator.
Output: See, he's regulating the wood.
He doesn't look dangerous yet. Let's talk to him a little more.
Output: Maybe he could help us. He looks very strong. Maybe he could help us break one of these windows.
Why do you have the clicks on your iPad?
Output: Oh, sorry, that's actually my ringtone.
It's alright that we don't agree all the time, Larry. I think that's a part of relationships. I can feel free and you can feel caged.
Output: Just like in our vows. Now, let's take a run at that mountain.
Buy a t-shirt from a mustachio gentleman. It says "Lauren Hill, worth the wait".
Output: We have some time to go t-shirt shopping.
You know, but if we drive too fast, you might not see you car.
Output: We are crawling though and this is a big parking lot.
I'm the older sister, but in many ways I am like your younger sister.
Output: Yes, but that's just what you tell people when you go to college parties so that you can make out with the cute young guys.
Are those guys asking the babies questions, do they work in Limbo or are they other babies stuck in Limbo?
Output: They're unbaptized older kids who also live in Limbo.
I plan on having this sport club be in my family for generations and generations and generations. I wonder if you might consider being my wife and giving birth to a son of mine.
Output: Well, I'm already considering it, obviously. Could I be on the council after we get married? I like being in charge.
Just to get this straight, we're offering you a $200,000 raise with a really lucrative stock option package and 23% of any of the business you bring in. That would bring your annual compensation to somewhere in the $1.2 Million range.
Output: That's certainly a generous offer. One word I didn't hear in there was comedy though. I respectfully decline the offer.
Mr. Chanderseon, I think I've spotted the water thief. I'm going to approach him, confront him, ask him to return the water, and leave the park.
Output: I don't mean to jump into your phone call, but he also needs to get my dog out of the dog that ate my dog. Can you get him to do that? He won't do nothing I ask.
Do you think I could find people uglier than me here?
Output: Sure, for example, Matt gets all his clothes from behind a Popeye's chicken.
Mary's on the mend now.
Output: That's good to hear. So, she's at St. Olaf's Hospital?
Patrons will sit in a barber's chair to eat.
Output: So, you're going to have four barbershop chairs sitting around a table.
Fred makes me feel dumb.
Output: Yeah, and pessimistic. Maybe I want to feel bad. Let me feel what I feel.
You don't get this at all, preacher. We're bad people.
Output: Well, in the eyes of the Lord, no one is a bad person.
Tell us what you want ghost. Tell us your desires.
Output: I walked through life and died with unfinished business.
Don't tell me you rounded all those kids up and put them in the same place, where they're just wandering around, missing their animals together?
Output: That actually seems kind of humane. If they were sad without their animals, at least they can commiserate.
Father, I will go on stage under one condition. I'd like Larissa to be at my side.
Output: I am honored. I would love to be on TV in my baggy outfit.
You're a legend. You're the youngest person ever.?
Output: I came right out of my mama and I got right on that floor and I started.
I'm just going to go home and fix things, I guess.
Output: Oh, is a lot of stuff broken at your house?
Joseph, did you hear Dana and Jody?
Output: I can't believe that Jody ate a whole roll of quarters. Do you think she ate it like a stick of butter, where she just bit into it and swallowed or do you think she at the quarters one at a time?
I just feel a little jealous. I didn't know about this part of your life, having friends.
Output: Hey, that's OK. Don't worry, baby. I don't have any friends no more. It's just you and me.
Hey mom, want to play catch right by the side of the road?
Output: Sure, darling. If that's what you want to do. I want you to be happy.
Mr. Sims, you understand that for the average customer, if they see a cockroach, it's gonna freak them out because they think the place is unsanitary.
Output: Listen, what's my philosophy, right? You want to eat? You want to get nourished in the place where life thrives. So any and all kinds of wildlife are welcome in my Quiznos.
Why, you're blushing and sweating a lot.
Output: Well, I just. You're a woman and I'm not used to that. It's just me and my dad.
If god wanted us to be in cars he'd a put wheels on us.
Output: And kept them filled up with gas so your mama didn't have to push you up a little hill.
It's my twin brother Amos.
Output: I don't know if you have twins where you're from, but we share DNA.
I feel alive for the very first time.
Output: I am too. I've always just looked like a corpse until right now.
He didn't care about that rectangle garden. That's why I switched to here.
Output: Well, the square garden is really where it's at. You know, it has been scientifically proven that every good garden is a square.
We're flying up to the sky, to the halls of where my ancestors look down upon us with judgement.
Output: Like old, empty inhalers?
Hey, it's Greg's turn to put a ball into Sebastian's mouth. Are you gonna do it, Greg?
Output: I'm gonna do it. Kids, I want you all to hold that putter. We all put our hands on top of each other's hands. We're going to have to remove his teeth first, or else the ball's never going to go in there.
I'll never forget the moment that ended up in the movie trailer when Sandra Bullock says "It happened to me. It  could happen to anyone." Probably my most enduring memory of The Net, the movie I was in.
Output: My biggest memory is when she orders pizza, man, and she uses the internet and it looks really good.
We were passing time until they opened the door, by playing beer patty cake.
Output: I like playing patty cake, myself.
Well, we're not floating above planet Earth at all. I don't even recognize that planet.
Output: It's barely a sphere.
Were they not good? I was entertained all day. I thought it was a fun thing to bring to work.
Output: But they did stand in front of the water fountain for an entire business day, saying they thought the water fountain was going to turn into a spider monkey.
My god, I'm remembering sad things that happened before I was born.
Output: I should have told you that this yo-yo has powers.
If there's no suspect, what are we voting on?
Output: Whether or not this case is guilty or innocent.
Jimmy, are you calling yourself Dillon on the phone again?
Output: Dillon's my cool name. Dillon Tristan.
Mr. President, my friend it outside somewhere. You probably just missed her because she's very short and hunched.
Output: Oh, she's hunched? She's carrying a lot of stuff?
Roger, what do you mean, it's rough in there?
Output: I left some emotions in there and you're not gonna want to  be a part of it. I didn't poop or anything, if y'all need to go poop that's fine.
Reverend, God above wants you to make love.
Output: I will only do this on one condition. We gotta move the show to Ghanna.
I don't know what to say.  I feel like I've broken down so many of your emotional barriers today and, being your mechanic and all, I haven't even begun to touch your car.  This is momentous.
Output: You've made me realize that my whole life has been nothing but a lie!
Kurt, do you want a dog? Maybe when the switch happens, I could be your dog.
Output: I'd like that. I could use a friend.
Maybe we could take these calcified fry droppings and use them as some kind of tablet.
Output: That's a good use for fry droppings.