niryuu/sni-each-converted huggingface dataset:
Bartal, if I don't hear this little new shit, Mindy sing within the next 30 seconds, I am going to explode. You better get her singing.
Output: I will. Welcome aboard, Miss Cynthia. It's great to have you finally be southern.
Can we just say that 2019 is a year of change.
Output: I just got a washer and dryer in unit, so I'm not going to need as much change this year.
Mr. Crimp, we're Denise and Chuck.
Output: Yeah, I have a goatee, so I look like a lot of other people with a goatee. It's a common mistake.
The Tums is the size of the bullet hole. Maybe if we put a Tums in there, it will remove the bullet.
Output: That's right. These are the high quality Tums that the general public doesn't know about.
There are quite a few golfing ghosts that golf at the golf course. Is it called a course?
Output: It is commonly known as a course, where golf is played.
Frant, can I speak to you for just a moment?
Output: Yes. One second, Missy.
Was the guy's name Steve that wouldn't help you?
Output: I'm pretty sure it was just because of his attitude.
Yeah, and they promise this to be a six-hour production.
Output: Yeah, so I don't know what the next four hours are going to be like.
They believe in a Sky God. I mean, they're morons.
Output: That's true. I"ll help you write up these pamphlets.
Hey, honey, remember our first date at the state fair? With that really hot chick and her stupid boyfriend who wouldn't let me get in there.
Output: Yeah, that was a really rough day for us. I really can't believe we got through all of it.
Lot of jokes in that movie, even though it's a very sad story.
Output: It's a very sad story about the internet ruining someone's life.
Yeah, I did notice that. But I wasn't going to say nothing because I've been criticized for having thoughts in the past.
Output: You shouldn't have been criticized for that. Your thoughts are just as valuable as anyone else's thoughts, if not more so.
Hey Ghost. What's your name, hey?
Output: Tim. But the "I" is a one.
Ted, it's so typical to make every bit of news about you.
Output: Yeah, you've always done it historically. I've got news for you buddy, it's not all about you.
I drove a truck for many years. Was in the service for awhile. Right now, currently out of work.
Output: Well you should thank your lucky stars that you got this job 'cause I tried to recommend my cousin Albert for this and they turned him down.
My husband and his smart phone spend a lot of time talking to each other. But, I'm not the jealous type, so I guess that's OK.
Output: You're wearing a dead man's hat, woman. Don't start in with me.
Yes, I went to middle school with Wrinkle Pants and then there was an experimental period in our marriage where he was quite integral.
Output: You were married in the middle school?
Well, my name's Calisto and she's Calista.
Output: They've never been outside of their house in Malibu before, Tiptop.
Wow, this is your new water park? This is great. Where'd you get all the water?
Output: Look for the hidden Mickeys is all I'm going to say. Wink.
Stop looking at my pubes.
Output: Your pubes connect to you face?
Yeah, Rudy's gone. How did you know, sir?
Output: He's just got a reputation. He was a great guy. I'll miss him working here.
My phone says we're supposed to get off the highway here, but it doesn't look like there's anything but a giant mountain in front of us.
Output: Well, I mean, why don't we just go over the mountain, right? I mean why did we buy this thing?
I smelled the Tesla charging station from a great distance. The static electricity charge in the air is unmistakable.
Output: The three Teslas are, of course, my Tesla, Gary's Tesla, and Pamela's. We just gave her hers for her sweet 16.
Well, I'm sorry. Not everyone voted and we just went with whoever they picked.
Output: I know. We really should have been more engaged in the process.
I'm having a beautiful mind moment. All the pieces are falling together. Bread connects to cigarettes, which connects to smoking, which connects to the hospital.
Output: Hey, you're writing on my wall!
You should start with the first letter of the alphabet.
Output: This is punk rock. I feel like I'm going to start with the letter G.
It's almost like it's related to you or something.
Output: You're saying that all of my brothers and sisters, they do drugs and alcohol because of me?
If she goes for a third wheel turn on the Wheel of Fortune, here's what you must do. You must hit the button under the counter. She will go bust and we will collect $300.
Output: That's more money then I've ever seen in a life time.
And you're all welcome to Sbarro after the wedding ceremony.
Output: Yeah, we really splurged for the after party.
Hey Charles, am I crazy or did your vocabulary get really good recently?
Output: Thanks so much. My mom has a word-a-day calendar.
Gary's out there?
Output: You know this cockroach?
Well, I'm sleeping in a dumpster.  What do you expect?
Output: She's got you there, dude.  That was not a good observation.  I mean, I thought that, but I didn't say it.
I told you to stop talking to Dixon about us. He never gives you good advice.
Output: Dixon is the man, babe.
You don't think it's weird that Crimpcrumper is encouraging you to take a straight razor to Geum's neck?
Output: I don't care. We got a clear shot to kill Geum, get the doughnuts, and get out of here. I want to go home.
I feel like we have so much in common. Do you guys want to go to lunch?
Output: Well, we'd love to have lunch, but we're getting ready to see Hamilton.
Sweetheart, please stop talking. We're watching the news.
Output: It's news time, honey. Go be a baby on your own time.
Guys, you heard him say that, right? We're on a deadline here. We have to convert this building to a bird cage.
Output: Right, when I woke up, I meditated and I did my affirmations. I didn't watch TV.
I said I was going to be nicer this year, but flirt less.
Output: When you flirt less, you seem to attract more men.
Dark Crystal, I can't believe you woke up. Where's you sister, Crystal Light? Is she still sleeping?
Output: She believes in me, so she decided to let me do this on my own.
The event invitation said to come dressed in an all-crab costume.
Output: What an annoyance.  I couldn't find a crab costume that fit me.
Elizabeth and I took a minor detour on the way over. We went to that room where you drink the drink and then you float up to the ceiling?
Output: We had sex in the bathroom.
It's very difficult to swallow swords.
Output: I was going to get up on stage and do the ham bone.
I want to listen to the music. Put something on the Hi-Fi. Let's Watusi the night away.
Output: I got the Jackson 5 Christmas album.
How about if we just go in separate directions? I haven't even made eye contact long enough to remember what either of you look like and I don't know your last names.
Output: My last name is Sanchez. My social security number is 726372664. My mother's maiden name is also Sanchez.
Mom, can you still hear me? I'm going to take my shoes off.
Output: My revenge will be swift and terrible. You'll never see it coming.
I've been following the founder's career.
Output: Have you really? You're that into it?
Oh, well, I actually came to complain about a student who forced himself on me.
Output: What do you want me to do about it, babe? You want me to beat him up? Would that get you hot?
Your son seems to be full lobster. But you're half lobster?
Output: Yeah, well, you can't control genetics. You know?
I don't want to go in the house.
Output: You think I do? I've already been in there. It's the worst.
Yeah, as I was saying, I'm a big World War II buff, so I know a lot of battle were fought right on that Alsatian border.
Output: Of course, that's where I'm from. But it's been so long since I was there, that I don't know if I have factual information, like right on the tip of my tongue.
I feel as if he should have the name of an exalted status that everyone will bow down and respect him in the future.
Output: OK. I always go for the anonymity of a plain name that allows him to flexibly travel through life.
I truly can't believe I died from just being discovered on the toilet.
Output: And I died from confrontation. How pathetic.
The Navajo have a very extensive belief that you can go out and change your skin and become a wolf or coyote.
Output: You're right. I think I read about this once. Man can become beast. Babies can become men.
Before you do, just remember, glass grits means it's just ground glass.
Output: Well of course it's ground glass. How else would I make glass grits?
I can use the creature to wish for anything I want?
Output: Anything you want except getting by without reading. You really gotta learn how to read.
I think we should, I mean, we've got blood diamonds. I think we should get something even worse than a blood diamond. Takes some kid's soul and put it in a diamond, maybe.
Output: Oh, you know what that makes me think of? It's a little bit of a jump. How about a bead? Like a clunky, awkward, large bead? We can make them sort of like charm bracelets.
Thank you for asking about my talent. I will be sharing Act 2 and 3 of my upcoming play that hasn't yet been produced. Consider it a pitch. It's the meaty bits of my play.
Output: We're all doing little talents that can comfortably fit into a talent show and you're doing 2 acts of a play by yourself?
We have thousands of campers and I need you to step away from the tree.
Output: Beth, I'm going to be straight with you, because I'm standing right behind this honesty tree. I'm leaving. I've been sent on a mission.
So, you do card tricks and coin tricks?
Output: See this little plastic sheet I have. See that it's in my left hand. Now, look, it's in my right hand.
Jeremy, we're at the zoo this year for your birthday, since last year's birthday was insanely bad.
Output: Yeah, of course. I don't know why you have to explain that to me. I got my name written on the loser list incorrectly.
Dr. Phil, we can remove the snack from your body if we get to Hawaii.
Output: I can't have it in me anymore. You better take it out of me right now.
I know another guy that teaches a workshop called "Strong and Wrong". I'd like to try that one.
Output: That is weird. It doesn't really sound promising, at all.
Kid, you can't have lunch with teachers.
Output: But I'm so lonely.
The paper says "from now on, everybody is everything."
Output: How is that enforceable? It's a law?
Honesty tree, I've never spoken to you before, but I'm worried about my friend.
Output: I've been wanting to tell you about Gerald for a long time.
Bill, I don't know you very well. You seem like the kind of man who is really trying to to make sense of this mess. Can you explain how I was able to get off the plane and go to Orange Julius and steal an orange julius for my beloved husband?
Output: That's a great question, Delorians. If you look at that orange julius you're holding, you'll see that it's a rolled-up skymall catalog that you just dumped some orange juice into.
Hey, listen. Don't tell them about me. They shouldn't know that I'm a talking spider in here.
Output: Hey, you gave me one of your legs, so that's like a bond for life.
Well, I'm from lore. Which means I'm a mythical creature.
Output: Oh, like the chupacabra or the loch ness monster?
Excuse me, sir. Are these the only two seats on the train?
Output: These are the last two seats on the train. There's no room in any other car. So the four of you will have to decide who sits in the train car.
We should make him pay us the amount of money that was in the jackpot.
Output: He knows what he did. He asked me if he could finish that cookie.
Listen, I'm just saying that we can be roommates. That's just where the relationship ends. 
Output: The deed is in my name. You had me sign these papers.
Are you sure a lot of people call me denture man.
Output: That isn't exactly true, they are calling you adventure man, as in it's always a horrible adventure talking to you.
Has anyone seen Brother Thomas? I heard he was in trouble.
Output: He was wandering over there. He didn't seem to be in trouble but he was talking to himself. And banging his head into the wall.
Sorry I'm late.  Did I miss much of the tour?
Output: Yeah, well, you missed the sprinkles over there.  That's Felix.  He's my dad.
Denise, you prayed for all those things I just gave you?
Output: I did. Not in that order, but yes, I prayed for them.
We have breaking news. If you bought a counter from Hard Soft Counters in the last 30 years, you are in grave danger of either spontaneous human combustion or vaporization.
Output: Sweetheart, that's my counter. That's where I got my counter.
Sven, you are so lucky to be absorbing all of this. Every time he sweats you must drink it.
Output: He's been teaching me some things. But, I have my own art that I wanted to put up if that's cool.
Lynn, darling. I feel as if we have to do some sort of warm up exercises before we go out on stage tonight.
Output: In my background, we did a lot of improv games. Perhaps we can do a little bit of pass the clap.
Can we just have the birthday boy, this is just tradition, birthday boy can you tell us once again about the most famous logger you ever met?
Output: Surprised y'all even want to hear it, I told it some many times. His name was Giant Carlos the Foothills.
We're having some difficult conversations about life and mortality.
Output: Oh, this early in the morning?
Oh, well, welcome to Cold Stone.
Output: Hey look, I know that you make your ice cream on a stone. Can I get some of that stone in the ice cold ice cream?
She's finally grown into her hanker-chief shirt that she's worn for years. She was horrifically underdeveloped for quite a long time.
Output: I was. They called me the Jackie Tohn of my age.
I feel lightheaded. I've lost too much blood.
Output: I'll take this scarf and take a tourniquet around her leg and oh my god, that's so much blood.
.....Anyway, I said to cut off the head. I'm not sure why you're laughing. That's not a joke.
Output: Ohhh, that's a sad way to put your dog down. We're laughing through the pain.
Oh, from beep bop beep bop Benjamin Brown's Tire and Rotation Auto Parts?
Output: That's right. We're currently being sued by Brubble and Brown. For copyright infringement on their theme song. But we did it first. It's just we were underground.
I don't know if you can be my husband. You're not real.
Output: That makes me the best husband. Do I snore? No, I don't. Do I hog the covers? No. Do I ever tell you that you don't look beautiful? That's right. I'm Ricardo. I should be your husband.
I have wonderful news. My family just won a cruise! Blanche, I was going to invite you on the cruise. You see, I just left my wife, and my son needs a mother before he goes to Clemson. He can't be at Clemson without a mother.
Output: Here's the thing, Mr. Nelson Nelson Sr. I've been unhappily married for a long time. I would be honored to go on a cruise with you.
Tina, I'm worried about Junior.
Output: I don't think he's looking too well these days.
Murnice, will you marry me?
Output: I haven't even cried at this gravestone. Yes, I will marry you.
What you don't know is that each time you die. I die of a broken heart. Then I come back to life before you do and I bury you. Then I dig you back again when it's time.
Output: I did not know that because I never asked. Because there are no questions in Maine, but only broken hearts.
The court will now hear the case of Morisette v Morisette.
Output: I'm sorry, sir. I'm tired because I was up all night  filming that episode of Sex in the City, where I kissed Sarah Jessica Parker.
This is the kinda counter material you need. We can have this made for you in the next five minutes.
Output: Amazing. I'm going to give you $1000 for the counter.
I wanted to go into business with you and your parents but I can no longer do that.
Output: Mr. Thompson, is there any way I can make this right? Look, I brought a bag of freshly boiled bagels.
Bob, are you taking this woman's order? I hope she's paying full price like every customer in Margaritaville.
Output: Yes, Mr. Timmins. Of course she is.
I've got to get to a shrink or something. Something's not right. I'm not myself. I never used to have these sexual thoughts. And then all of a sudden I see one poster of a man without pants on and you've gotten into my mind like some kind of worm.
Output: That's right. Now I'm here to stay like the sexiest worm that ever got inside the apple of a mind.
My wife won't even us an Alka Seltzer because she thinks the bubbles are evil.
Output: They are. Each one is a soul that is going to hell.
Chuck, not only will I never underestimate you again, but I am going NOT to have Ken kill you with a machete.
Output: You'e always thinking of me. I really appreciate that. I knew you would come through for me.
There's one thing i've always wanted. It's the respect of my inferior officer and and now that I have it I couldn't be happier.
Output: You got it. You've been above average-alright.
Oh, wait, the sleeping bags - they're puppet sized. I guess we'll put a foot in them?
Output: Of course they're puppet sized. I'm a puppet. What do you think I sleep in?
Guys, my wedding is a-traditional. I don't want to be defined by having an other. So this is my wedding for me.
Output: And also a funeral for your uncle.
Yeah, I told you I was using my shirt to take the water to go to my own park, which is not yet open.
Output: I'm going to ask you to return all the water.
Oh, that must have been my mistake. I thought it was in the back room, but I lost my mind and put the coffee in the bathroom.
Output: To be fair, Nelson, the bathroom is in the back.
So, you see, Jesus really had it pretty good in the Peanut Butter Dimension.
Output: I guess so, I mean, he did have nails driven through his hands and feet.
What if we also kill pets during this show?
Output: I like it. I sincerely feel as though pets have it coming. So, it may not be as much of a shock to the audience.
Doctor, I really want my husband to be here for the birth of our baby.
Output: If you want the baby to be a Libra, you better start pushing.
Doug, we've had some complaints about your work lately.
Output: They're wrong. Unless they say I'm too good.
We're cool as long as nothing gets in the way of my self preservation.
Output: That's one of the more sociopathic things that you've said.
I understand, looking at you, why you'd be mistaken as a professional actor.
Output: Oh, thank you. I've been told I have one of those faces.
I didn't think you would take me to a Color Me Mine.  I thought we were going to go to Paris, or some shit.
Output: You said you started reading The Artist's Way and you wanted to start making stuff!
Oh, you didn't hear? St. Olaf's burned down.
Output: Where have I been? How did I miss that in the news?
Did you happen to paint any pictures of Thomas Edison?
Output: I took a picture. I was walking past a church and they made a picture in the windows there.
Now, your wife told me two weeks ago that you supposed to buy her a blasted dress, and you forgot to buy her the blasted dress.
Output: Yes, I did, I did. I had a lot on my mind, what with my job and all.
Boys, what brings you to home?
Output: To be honest, mama, we just weren't sure if you were alive or not.
We never did forget the Captain.
Output: That's right. We never did. We've met every year on the day since then.
Welcome to the ghost train. Do you have a ticket to be here?
Output: No, but I have unfinished business on earth.
You are responsible for Bacon-Chest Twinkies?
Output: Not just that!  I also added lotion to toilet tissue.  I got a lot of ideas for every industry, but food is my heart.
Mr. and Mrs. Naven transformed their antiquities porch into a bedroom.
Output: Right, I am not passing any judgement into having or not having an antiquities porch.
Surely all of us are anti socialized and friendless enough that we can absolutely decipher the map.
Output: Yeah, we're basically cartographers.
Captain, you're already on board with living in the whale's belly?
Output: Well, we've got ample food. All we have to do is scrape some blubber from the wall any time we're hungry. That will regenerate.
Marcus, let me tell you something. Gerald's out. And I told him everything I felt about you. And that's that you're a no good, lying piece of shrimp. It's been boiling up inside me like, chlorophyll. The chlorophyll inside me has been boiling up.
Output: Oh, like instead of blood boiling. Since you're a tree.
I can't wait for us to get up there and enjoy the plushness.
Output: Yeah right have some real cheetos and some plush sumptuousness.
Here it is, the paper. My paper from my pocket.
Output: Your majesty, read the scroll aloud.
Stay here and I will tend to your wounds. You may have a concussion, you know.
Output: You saved me, I can't thank you enough. You're a hero.
So, this casserole is made of a compressed, nutrient algee base. It's something that we've grown here ourselves. It's made primarily from our breath and the natural molds that occur.
Output: It's really delicious. I can taste the chlorophyll.
You got me to stop smoking that pipe.
Output: Yeah, I mean it was a book that I just read out loud to you.
If you can, on your way to Staples, I need to drop this off at the DMV. I have an appointment, but I think I'm gonna be late. It's just a change of address.
Output: What? How's Maybelline gonna change your address? This is crazy. She's married to the daddy-master.
I think you stumbled on a good idea that sounded very fun. There would be a lot of opportunities for different voices from the different actors.
Output: Believe me, I know. I think that sounds great. But that is not what we got invited to.
You seem very angry.
Output: Well, I'm sorry. My husband is missing. My children are missing. Am I the only one who is authentically upset that I'm in the belly of a whale?
You're just like your grandfather. He was a sociopath and I loved him to pieces.
Output: Whoa, you guys really have a weird bond going on here.
Honey, I feel remorse. I feel like we made a terrible mistake by not accepting Hank's proposal.
Output: I feel like we should have gone with him because that would have been remote business.
You know what I don't like in movies? This kind of minimal violence, like someone gets their arm taken off. Yeash. That's much worse than somebody getting, like, dead.
Output: Do you know what I hate? When they re-write famous speeches like happened in Selma. They couldn't get the rights to Dr. King's speeches so they just made up some speeches. I bet Coca-Cola owns the rights to those speeches.
I just want to take a moment to say, Edgar, you could have just said something instead of doing this whole show for me.
Output: I know, I got the guilt in me. The guilt runs deep and I can't say my feelings. I can't communicate to you what I want.
If you'll just open the door for me, I'll be on my way.
Output: Look at this ghostly door. We will open it for you.
That was really beautiful singing.
Output: Oh, Fred, thank you so much. I just have to take these shower breaks to get it all out.
You. We never thought we'd see you again. You're the reason the Olympics have been dead for 40-something years.
Output: They stopped doing the Olympics altogether because I ran away?
Doc, what do you think. He's got this thing attached to him. It's pretty gross, right?
Output: Yeah, but I think he'll be fine. What could go wrong? I mean, I had a deer tick once and I got Lyme Disease briefly, and then I got rid of it.
Look guys, I'll level with you. Rita tried to kill me in there. We had an alliance that went south.
Output: I'm so glad I didn't have sex with her. This is not the first time I've promised to have sex with somebody who's threatened to kill other people.
We thought we moved to the area of the venue, where we didn't have to worry about being loud.
Output: Yeah, I know. I followed you up here.
Do you love her? Is it a her?
Output: Yes it is a her. She is ridiculously beautiful too.
I feel like some of the African American faculty over there has gotten a bit uppity. So, I'm going to hold back on the toilet paper for this next quarter.
Output: That affects everyone if you do that.
Yes, I would like you to go find Chuck, Demetrius. How about we go together. It will be like old times. Remember?
Output: Yes, us chasing your ex. Fine, we can go together. I just lost my job, but I have a few shackles saved.
I have a woman here that says she was married to Sam Houston when he was going by the name Robbie Houston.
Output: I had four children with him. We were living in Mexico. He said he had a business opportunity down there and so we moved down there. He never aged. It was so weird.
I had my own company and transformed buildings into bird houses.
Output: We could lock these children in them and call them the Birds of Akron.
This is Karen. She's newly back in the work force.
Output: I had a terrible accident. I hurt my hip.
You're actually rising into the air, Geum.
Output: I feel wonderful. I'm so full of sugar and joy.
Most people say you can't put electronics in the dishwasher, but that is wrong.
Output: They also say you can't put them in your mouth.
What if, in order to right this old wrong, we get on what I assume is your scooter, because this is Madrid. And he artfully respectfully stops at a stop sign here, and you can watch it and feel satisfied, will that kill your murderer urge?
Output: It's tricky because it's a different class of vehicles. So thetest you have to take is not exactly the same.
Mr. Brown, you are a mean teacher for bringing us to this parrot zoo, knowing that there are no  parrots here.
Output: Charisma, don't crumple up the poem that you wrote for Mr. Brown. He might redeem himself later.
It's all in the book. The national Iceland book that we all live by.
Output: It says that, to make the customers comfortable, you should use American southern dialect. Which is what I do.
Yes, well, my teacher was wondering if you might come to class with me one of these Wednesdays and talk to the kids about your contraptions.
Output: Oh, you know about my Wednesdays. It's one of my days of the week. I'm busy.
Dad, you're the coolest. Thanks for getting me out of that stupid clarinet bullshit. Is that okay if I say that?
Output: Of course it is. I wish you'd curse more around me.
Are you Doris's dog? You know, Doris, the person that gives you food.
Output: Oh, yeah. Food person. Yeah, she's nice.
You guys should just open that bathroom door if you want to talk to us. It's weird. We're like talking through the door and can't even see you.
Output: OK. Good, because we've reached kind of an impasse.
Not a day goes by that I don't wake up feeling tricked.
Output: Every single day in Narnia? What's the earliest trick you can remember?
I thought I was the shit, but it turns out I can only create shit.
Output: That's pretty poetic.
He's doing the juggling, but I think it's killing him.
Output: Oh my god. Now he's only a foot long tapeworm. He cut himself in half with the chainsaw.
Hi, sorry we're late. We were having a bit of a kissing party in the lavatory.
Output: Yes, I hope no one minds. We were just kissing each other in the lavatory.
Watch, I can turn into anything. Hey, look at me.
Output: Oh my god, Ralph's been transformed into a cat.
Well, it does sound like that counseling paid off, but I will take that hot pink blanket.
Output: All right.  It's your funeral and possibly the funeral of your children.
Todd, what did I tell you about discussing the sexual practices of people in this high school?
Output: I just like guessing who is a virgin and who isn't.
My dog was in good shape when I got him. He's really falling apart now.
Output: How long as he been on life support?
What's the deal with the teeth. They are enormous.
Output: Baby teeth. You know how they grow in other countries? They are just bigger than your countries baby teeth.
I'm very sleepy and big noises, loud noises, really upset me.
Output: Then this is the blender for you. You're going to think it's not even plugged in.
Kids having speech impediments are the reason why their parents signed them up for the sport of fencing to begin with.
Output: It's disgusting.  I can hear them slobbering and mumbling through their wire mesh masks.
We've been falling on some hard times.
Output: Oh, Jonathan. So you sold your dryer? How much did you get for it?
This place is nowhere near the status of Greg's golf course.
Output: Oh, I miss Greg's. You know, I'm supposed to be at Greg's right now.
Oh boy I feel like a real jerk now for not going to the funeral and singing the funeral song.
Output: Maybe the rain will let up, you know. Maybe someone else knows the song. Do you think it's going to be a big service?
This is interesting. This play's taking a turn. It's no Noises Off, but they're breaking character - breaking the fourth wall - though they're not really addressing us.
Output: What a refreshing twist. I'm coming around on it.
Would you like some very spongy popcorn?
Output: You know what?  I'm just so hot.  It's a code one hundred, so it's, like, so hot in these suits.  I'm just going to take some of our complimentary Gatorade that we get here for working for free.
Now, you don't have anesthetic, but you have moonshine. Wonderful.
Output: Yes, all you need to do is chug it down and we'll get started on your treatment.
It's me, Monsieur Foothill. Is this your logging town, my friend?
Output: Why yes, it is. I'm so happy that you're here visiting on my birthday of all days.
Not so fast. Why are you calling me the asshole of the group?
Output: Tad, everyone knows if there's an actor in a group, that's the asshole.
It's piano, not pian-er. You're one of those people who adds an unnecessary 'er' to the end of certain words. It's very troubling.
Output: Sometimes-er I do-er. It's a free country-er. Now I'm going to do it out of spite-er.
Mr. LaCroix, these pants are specially made to keep your cheese moist.
Output: Do I have multiple pockets? I like to carry many kinds of cheese with me.
I don't know how these cars work.  I got in my vehicle, turned it on, and then some sort of genie bottle looking thing popped up on my dashboard.  I had to look in my car pamphlet to find out what the damn thing meant.  It turns out, it means oil.  I didn't even know my car ran on oil.  I thought it ran on gasoline!
Output: Yeah, it's a common misconception.  Basically, what you're going to need is a normal 38 point inspection, and that genie bottle means that you've got two wishes left from the car.  Did you rub the steering wheel when you were driving it?
I was reading in a book once that if you dig around the wrong cactus it could unleash some evil spells. What if we make the wrong decision and ruin the town even more than it's already ruined?
Output: Can I be honest with you? Given the little you know about my home life, do I have anything to lose? I don't care about the stupid town.
Denise, I heard from the other teachers that your performance in their classes is suffering, as well.  I also heard there was an incident in the gymnasium.
Output: Well, yeah.  We were all in the gymnasium and everybody said, "Hey, Denise, turn around!"  So, I did, and then they all just hit me with their balls.
If you have good props, you can do whatever you want.
Output: Will any of these props help me shrink a bunch of people?
Yield. Yield!
Output: That fight was unbelievably fast. You just bounced right off of her shoulder.
Nurse, prep the Doctor for flight.
Output: Doctor, I'm going to attach this little thing to your wrist for safety.
A co-worker called me and said you might need someone to talk to. 
Output: I grow weary of being the God over so many systems of life.
I'm interested in your nudes. I don't have long to live. Consider it make a wish.
Output: You can see all of my nudes. I printed them out in sort of a coffee table book and bound it with  leather.
OK, um, well everything looks... wait, what is that on the counter?
Output: It's not a tapeworm. I promise.
Tad, everyone knows if there's an actor in a group, that's the asshole.
Output: Yeah, like the way you talk to your parents and tell them everything. We had this plan going for awhile, we were going to do a fun thing together, we were going to be independently wealthy, we were going to get our own house with a fire pole in it.
I just came up to tell you that if you plan to move back into the great seats in front of me, I'd like you to be quiet and respectful of Yngwie Malmsteen, who happens to be a person by the way.
Output: Right, but he's up there with a whole band. So, we thought the whole band was also his name, like Dave  Matthews Band.
Did you ever pick the lock? Do you know how?
Output: I was just about to. I was so close and then we would have got those documents.
Gregor, Svetlana, Igor - come. We're going to say sing Happy Birthday.
Output: Remember, we cannot sing Happy Birthday from Mildred and Benny Hill, we have to sing pre-approved, royalty-free TGIFriday version that we all know very well.
Still not clear how a regular sized tapeworm is able to ride and operate child's bike.
Output: Look, I don't question miracles mama and papa.
I can only imagine the hell that's going on on that plane right now.
Output: Oh, honey. You feel so much. You are such a good man.
What are you seeing in your dream, Tony?
Output: I'll have two six inch meatball subs.
We're completely out of the LaCroix familly water. Within a day, this business will be no longer.
Output: Mr. Cruthers, Mr. LaCroix is on his way up here right now.
You say stalactite, I say stalagmite.
Output: Those are two totally different things. You should write a song about that.
All right, Rocko, we gotta get in this car quickly. We gotta get that placard.
Output: Alright, one the count of three I'll pry the door open.
You know I've been stressed out about my wife.
Output: I know. Hey listen, Jonathan, I want to say I appreciate you calling me whenever your wife goes to work so we can have this place all to ourselves. The acoustics in your house are fantastic.
I see, through the window, one gentlemen. He's a very posh looking fellow. He seems to be on his way up to help. Is he one of your men?
Output: Yes, that's right. That's that young man I employed. I promised him that I'd give him college credit if he accompanied me on my trip.
It makes me feel warm in my cold, cold chest.
Output: When you get cold, I get scared that you're dead.
Yes, about that.  Um, birds are all related.  What if something wasn't a falcon exactly, but very close?  Very close.
Output: Well, I was wondering what you had under this sheet; this sheet over this cage-like shape.
When I get my car, I would need a lot more headroom. Maybe it would be a convertible. I haven't really thought this through.
Output: You could get a convertible and the wind would be in your face and you could just be free.
Well, Charles. It's been great being your doctor, but I don't deal with losers.
Output: Also, you're 14, there's no way you should still be seeing a pediatrician.
I kissed you back and it was great. I wanted to see you again.
Output: You did? You didn't say it.
You said it's busy, but you both just seem to be sitting here in the break room. You're both playing solitaire.
Output: Well, we're on break.
I'm thinking a thought. There's a scroll and it says on it - or maybe it's just a piece of paper - how to uncurse the jewels.
Output: Wait a minute, a scroll? When I was at the ice cream place I wrote down a funny joke on the pocket wallet I have.
Yes, we're Bernie and Bernadette Bernsie?
Output: I got burned by you a couple years ago. You sent those oven mitts back and said they didn't work.
Are you trying to tell us that you invented the grilled cheese sandwich at home when you were a kid?
Output: That's pretty much what I'm saying. Do you have proof that I didn't?
Good sir, kind lady. Do y'all have any questions for this wondrous oracle that I have built to take me into space?
Output: Well, I just would hope by the time you get it up there there's some science there to be done. Think about the environment, or climate change. Certainly you're not just going up there spending what has to be a billion dollars, or thereabouts, just to see what the shape of Savannah is from space. I feel like the world wide web could tell you that now.
Golgatha, I'm not surprised to hear that you're a Marley Gibbs fan.
Output: You can see my T-shirt, I guess. It's the Marley Gibbs Fan Club Official President.
Your pubes connect to you face?
Output: Yes. Look. The beard is going up, not down.
So as you can see, over here we have such a cool selection of different shirts. Now, were you looking for something with a designer or something that's plain?
Output: Since it's a funeral I have to go to, probably plain.
So I'm thinking we should advertise so the people in the neighborhood know we'll ship anything.
Output: For sure. Maybe in the pennysaver?
This is the first customer in thew new regime of our concession stand.  What do we do if gasoline's what this guy wants?
Output: You've got to give him gasoline, but give him Mitierry Sauce!  That's gasoline, cheese, bell peppers, a baby arm, and two pieces of bacon.
Jeanine, I'd like to talk to you about the improv bake sale.
Output: Oh, OK. Gosh, is it that time of year again? This is my favorite time of year.
Tad, I'm saying if you want dogs to stop taking your prosthetic leg, don't be sanding it with beef jerky.
Output: Well listen, I mean, you got both your legs and they both keep a natural shine to them. Your legs look great. For me, it's worth having the shine beef jerky gives me even if I lose the leg for a couple weeks at a time.
I think a problem about them being together is that Rhonda's married to seven men already.
Output: Yes, but two of them are dead, one of them's a woman, and the other one doesn't love me that much.
I'm going to smother you to death. Much like you tried to do to your dear grandmother.
Output: It was still a very good hug.
What's crazy is I've never felt like I was sassy at all. But you're both saying I'm sassy.
Output: You're sassy alright. It's in the pitch of voice. No one ever tells someone with a low voice that they're sassy. That's the trick.
Are you one of those real trolls or are you just someone who has a mental illness that decided to leave society and live underground?
Output: I used to be an accountant, but now I think of myself as a fictional character learning the different steam pipe structures around the city.
Does paper digest or does it come back out as paper?
Output: A little tiny slip of fortune cookie paper? I think it's safe to say that one's gone.
Daniel, I'm sorry, but I'm leaving you for all animals. They don't care if I've forgotten if we dated in Paris or France or Italy or Rome.
Output: Well, good because you haven't dated any of those animals and they'll never even remember a date that didn't happen.
You could help restore it to its former glory.
Output: Artists could express themselves.
I can't go to Fifty Shades Darker with my friend?
Output: Not with her, she has no jaw.
Let me see your tiny butthole. Pics or it didn't happen.
Output: He pressed a button on his pants and they lowered.
Briff, I feel a need to, uh, to say all of the parts.  Is that okay with you?
Output: No, that's not okay with me.  That's bullshit.
You are a free vet of lancing. Like, you do it for free?
Output: Yeah, I will lance your boils for free.
I'd be happy to poison anything you need.
Output: Oh we know, Priscilla. You're so sweet. You've killed so many people for us.
This is it, this has to make me happy. This has to fix everything.
Output: Chuck, I feel like you're putting a lot on this trip.
Could you please mash down the stuff that's already in the recycling bin, so that the lid closes all the way and I don't have to see the poster sticking out?
Output: You're gonna have to stick a leg in there and you're going to feel silly, but it's just recycling. So, it's clean.
I've literally been letting out one continuous fart this entire time. I apologize.
Output: I thought it was the whale we're stuck inside blowing water through its hole.
Hey, I saw you guys, are you about to eat your tacos?
Output: I just took a bite of snorkie for the first time.
Please, I beg you to call me Ted.
Output: OK, Ted Macaroon, we've got to get this shot.
As we say where I'm from, "Well, I'll be a broken off corn in the foot of a poor woman".
Output: I'm also from here and I've never heard that saying before.
Every police car in Wanitoba has come out after our accident.
Output: Oh, no, everybody? Oh look at them all. Hi Jerry, hi Steve.
Geum, just the usual for me, please.
Output: Just the usual? But Miranda, it's your birthday. Don't you want to do something special?
Hey, who are you talking to? You're yelling down the toilet. Are you sick or something?
Output: I'm talking to a couple kids that are in the storm drain. I still have like 9 more awesome things to say.
I just think you're angry because your mom never came home from buying cigarettes.
Output: She had to go far. They don't let you smoke in this state anymore.
Is your soliloquy over, 'cause your machine is leaking?
Output: What is this strange liquid coming out from my beeps and boops.
Mr. Fancy Pants over here is bucking for a promotion.
Output: It's really easy to remember. Descend starts the same as down. Ascend starts the same as up. OK, maybe not.
Do you like the new name? I wanted to ask everyone what they thought about it.
Output: It's easy to put on a hat.
That is that introverted behavior that I won't tolerate if you want to continue to be married!
Output: You are going to have to tolerate it because if you leave me you will lose out on all of my beanie babies, and I know you would never do that!
Why is no one looking at the x-ray monitor. Don't you see? Dana ate a whole roll of quarters. 
Output: She's throwing up like crazy. Disgusting!!
Serving high end sushi is how they got him to do Ocean's Eleven.
Output: They put it on the sound stage and he showed up.
This is Tia, my love relationship person.
Output: Tia, as in spanish for ant?
Papa, be careful in your Pope mobile. I painted all the window to look like ceramic.
Output: Thank you, but that might not be so helpful.
Okay. My name is Jonathan and I'm here for the R-star repair segment.
Output: Absolutely. Absolutely. We're going to just get you in this dressing room right here, down the hall. It's got your name on it.
This is a grave perversion of mars base regulations.
Output: I understand. I'm sorry, commander. I know I've let you down. I know that this is perhaps the most nontraditional, traditional-nontraditional outcome that one could expect.
Santa didn't mean any disrespect.
Output: Dr. Chang, please. We know it's you.
I pursued my restaurant-eaur career and this is a stew restaurant, of course.
Output: Oh yeah, you used to make food at the LensCrafters.
I buff my scalp and I twirl my mustache. I clean my glasses on the end of my sweater. I sound my barbaric yelp over the stilt-tops.
Output: I'm a sweaty-toothed madman. Take me, James Patterson.
What was this Linda's last name?
Output: Hold on a second. I wrote it on one of these walls.
Derek, you said that he needs to harden up.
Output: I did say that. You're right. How do you always remember these things?
Do you hear the music now, Mr. Stanfield?
Output: Take off your metal vest.
Katarina, this is biggest time time for amusement park hotdog stand. Why are you leaving now?
Output: Well, there's four people outside. We have almost no patrons.
How do you do sir? I didn't see you standing there.
Output: I didn't see you standing there either. I was just about to comment on what a lovely day it was here in Savannah, Georgia.
The bad news is that the jack booted thugs sent by the president are right outside the door and they are going to shoot all of us.
Output: Hold on. We have materials in the room. We have yarn, Popsicle sticks, ottomans and pop up books.
I have rented one of those R-BnBs.
Output: I've heard of that before. It's a bed and breakfast wiith R&B playing all the time.
Is this your first job?
Output: I guess so, I mean I also babysat my own sister.
You gotta go, sorry Uncle Harry.
Output: Yeah, you're on your own now. Merry Christmas. Take the goat with you.
Are you all blind? This isn't doctor Hawaii, this is Dr. Phil in disguise.
Output: Not only that, he had a sports car disguised as a van.
We're going to bring you to dinner when we cook you.
Output: Just to be clear, you're going to seal the top of the chimney. You're going to light a fire. And so you're going to burn me alive and smoke me at the same time.
Do you hear that? That's elevator music and an automatic door. We're going into a grocery store.
Output: This is my chance to get out of here. Maybe she'll finally use me.
You're never getting out of here on your own. Take that money and run, got to a border town.
Output: I'm running, ma. I'm running.
Do you do voices? For the simulator, we need you to be able to do different voices. Like, we may want to simulate a cook.
Output: Hey, you want some eggs or something? Pretty good right? That's the voice I would do if I were a cook.
That is what the voodoo princess said. She said "he who signs for it has to take it, and he who doesn't lives another year."
Output: OK, I'm not going to sign it then.
I'm always impressed by a constant accent.
Output: Yes, there's nothing I hate more than an accent that's just all over the place. You don't know which way to turn.
We put them on the penguins, had to make them all hats and uh... you know, it worked like a charm up until they went  in the water. Got them all rusty.
Output: Yeah, cause they're not designed for aquatic use.
Rumpelpiltdown is interested in having some extra security at his hovel.
Output: Great. Yeah, I'd love to just watch over you. Is there some kind of predator to gnomes?
I don't think this ghost knows anything about the theater, at all.
Output: The only thing he does know is to not stop talking.
When we get close to the destination, can I drive the cab in?
Output: Yeah, sure. I have a gun, so we can do that.
Honey, you better bow. This is her majesty, Kay.
Output: It is I. Kay of Kay Jewelers.
Well, there's a lot of expensive machinery here.
Output: It's very impressive, I know, but I just thought, like, as birth being sort of a natural process, that once my wife gave birth, the machines we just kind of helping, not really doing all the work.  So, it wouldn't be quite as expensive as it is.
A nun gave us bingo when we got engaged. It was hilarious. A nun came up and we weren't even near a church.
Output: Yeah, we were just by the water. She came out of the water.
Oh, you are obviously American. I apologize. This was just a demonstration. You'd really do me a solid if you could just be cool.
Output: Wait, you're demonstrating how to pick a pocket? To your young apprentice?
If I wanted an echo, I'd go up on the Yeti.
Output: Fair enough. I love that ride.
Jermaine has been working here for 16 years.
Output: Before that I had a whole career in electrical engineering.
Being a model on The Price is Right is the greatest gig you could ever hope for.
Output: You're right. It's hard to get a long-lasting gig in LA.
Let me tell you something, mister. When you first showed up I thought you had something. This is interesting. Everyone wants the power of flight. But I don't want some doctor cutting open my body and attaching these wings to me. So I'm out.
Output: And as for me. Listen, I was with a little start-up years ago, and we were putting thermostats in people's forearm so when you walk around you can know what the temperature was. Two people lost their arms in the trials. So, I'm out, because I've been down this road before.
David, we've not had a student like you in some time. Please talk to these young, up and coming students.
Output: Fellow incoming students. When I'm asked for advice about starting in this intergalactic school of performing arts, I usually give three nuggets of information.
I'm representing myself in court. I don't have a law degree. All I have is my good word, which is bullshit.
Output: It's not great. You're accused of murder. And attempted murder.
Look at the length of my shadow, dad.
Output: Son, that's an even bigger shadow than I've been even carrying around this whole time.
Mom, we sound about the same age.
Output: I think that experience at MTV aged you a lot. There's a streak of white in your hair now.
Hey, congrats. You became a lawyer so fast.
Output: Thanks. Well, you know what I did? I passed the bar.