niryuu/sni-each-converted huggingface dataset:
Get a room, you two. I'm just saying.
Output: You keep bringing it up so much, I'm wondering if you're the one who wants to get a room.
It's so hot I'm losing my mind.
Output: It is so hot here in Savannah, Georgia.
Is that a first edition belt?
Output: It is, look, it say's so right here on the back in letters made with the blood of an albino squirrel.
Tracy, give me inhaler.
Output: I don't know, Tony, you treated me real bad. I don't know.
Well, doubt is a good thing sometimes. It pushes you to be stronger.
Output: When my daddy doesn't believe me, it cuts up my soul, but then a scar forms and makes it stronger.
That tapeworm was so brave, trying to save our family.
Output: I wish a spider was here to write in web "some tapeworm." That's my wish, anyway.
Guys, quick question. Are we doing different accents now in the gang?
Output: I sound like this because I just had a lemonade. We're all sugared up and our vocal cords got effected.
I'm sorry, Mr. Gumbers, I've had some problems at home.
Output: Don't give me those crocodile tears. Did your mom die a third time?
Here's some stuff that we have. This is, we have some overhangs which would really get in your way, especially if you'e wearing a large spacesuit. I mean, it reduces visibility like nobody's business.
Output: That's what we're going for. Great.
Look, they're walking away. He's actually putting the flask down. Who does that? What a weirdo. Skip, go spike the flask.
Output: Oh, I had a sip of this stuff and it's no good, Skip. My liver hurts already.
We can't meet them on their level. We have to drag them onto ours.
Output: We gotta drag them way down, claw at them from the hole we dwell in and bring them down to our level. I couldn't agree more.
Listen, you're two yokels that like in a ramshackle house in the middle of fucking West Virginia. Can you help me, please?
Output: That's right. We sold our palace for these Teslas.
Does anyone have a problem with flashing lights? At one point during the maze, there is a fucking ton of flashing lights.
Output: I do have severe epilepsy. Will that be a problem?
What is she doing in there, she's been in there forever.
Output: I think she is in there talking on the phone.
Alright, kids, since the game is over, you have to go back into the cage.
Output: Unfortunately, that's true. We have to lock you up.
Oh, Madeline, I didn't recognize you in your boutique school outfit.
Output: I dressed like my favorite head mistress as a girl.
I'm happy to show you what's behind the curtain. As you can see, it's just not nuts back here. It's all matter of things.
Output: Oh my gosh, it's like being in a playhouse of depravity. It's not for the faint heart.
I can hear the pre noise of the hills before the hills start to rumble.
Output: Oh, yeah. All the birds and the leprechauns go silent.
Mario, now listen.  This is supposed to be a romantic honeymoon.  Pussibly is probably going to be, uh, my favorite wife.  I'd like this to last forever.  We're going to get to Venice and have a great time.?
Output: Okay, but, uh, you know this is the third honey Mario and Luigi have worked for you on.  You have had a lot of wives.
I guess there's a tiny possibility that we could get the hatch open. We get it open just enough to cause absolute disaster.
Output: Well, I'm thinking that the probability that that might happen is probably the same amount as the probability that got us stranded under here anyway. So let's do it, huh?
Listen, I'm not going to lie to you. It's not a full house out there, guys. It's a pretty light crowd.
Output: Well, I know I can still count on my wife to be out there.
Here's my Venmo credit card that I just ordered.
Output: Okay, well, I'm going to go charge this and then I'm gonna come back and cut you up and eat you.
I liked it better when we just knocked a hoop down the middle of main street with a stick.
Output: Aw, fiddlesticks. Everybody knows that hoop rolling is over and robbing is in.
You can help me by directing me toward a blender. I'm looking or a new blender with several blades in there and several speeds.
Output: Uh-huh, well I'll tell you what, ma'am. We have the Cuisinart. Here's something you're going to find special about that. It's actually the word cuisine and art side by side.
Felix is the only father that works at our company.  What a coincidence that all of our other male employees are completely impotent.
Output: Sterile.  Yeah.  Yep, I thought it was a requirement you had.
Your ring tone is somebody whispering "you're going to die?" Can you turn that on vibrate?
Output: Sorry about that. My husband likes little pranks like that.
Alright, Arlene, you're not going to bring that coyote in here, you hear me? Or else, there will be heck to pay.
Output: Earl, you've never spoken to me like that.
You thing this is some kind of fucking train station, where people can wander in?
Output: OK. It is a train station. Don't turn them away.
I have an idea. Your boss is so mysterious. Let's go see him, a la Wizard of Oz. We'll pick our characters and go see him.
Output: I'm Dorothy, I don't care.
So, did people get to tell the spirit of the coach they hated him at his funeral?
Output: Oh yeah, it was cathartic. It was a three day event.
Hey Rush, just two and a half hours until showtime.
Output: Great, we've got time to practice just one song.
Oh, you can see the guy in the airplane bathroom?
Output: Yeah, I got x-ray vision from all the moonshine I've been drinking.
Help yourselves to all the deli meat. What are you going to do with this anyway?
Output: We're going to make a big, thick suit.
It's the true spirit of Aid Man, the fat super hero, who wants to help.
Output: You know, I'd like to think that there's a little Aid Man in all of us.
You really did it, man. We didn't even think you were going to be able to make this.
Output: Thanks, Pete. I'm appreciative to be here on this planet one more day.
Are you sure you want to challenge everyone to wrestle? Because everyone here is at least a head taller than you.
Output: I'm a spitfire. I don't give up.
I've been in 13 bands, so it wasn't confusing to me. They were all before I met you.
Output: Oh, I had no idea about these other bands. It sounds like everyone else knew though.
Gosh, it's Jack Thunderstorm from WPIG.
Output: WPIG, your number one source for weather, in the afternoons, evenings, and mornings.
Got another one of those beers? I love a beer first thing after a five year sleep.
Output: It's a powdery beer, too.
Well I just can't wait to get us some popcorn and RC Cola.
Output: Oh, I hope it has all the bubbles that I require to enjoy a cola.
I've tried so hard to hide it. That's why I go in the blinds section and sit there behind all the well produced blinds. It keeps the light out and the pain and the secrets in.
Output: It's good for hiding a limp. It's like shopping at Von's all your life only to discover it was a John's all your life.
Doctor, it seems like everyone's having a breakthrough. How about you?
Output: Well, I guess knowing that you guys are together, I feel like I can retire from my practice now.
I tried to do that thing one time, where we cut up the pizza and we rearranged the slices to make it look like there was more pizza. But, in the end, we both knew it was the same amount of pizza.
Output: Yeah, you could fool someone else. But you can't fool yourselves.
Do you think there will still be an opener, since Lauren was so late.
Output: That would be super rude, right?
Ma'am, can we help you?
Output: I'm just taking a nap, just taking a nap.
I went to Build-a-Bear and you weren't there. They said that you muttered to yourself and walked out in this direction. I followed you.
Output: Don't you understand? They were asking me to put hearts inside bears rather than bears around hearts.
Why do we do this? Why are we working in a piano store?
Output: You know, my father once told me something. Son, he said, lots of things are made to be ticked, but nothing's made to be tickled like ivories.
I heard about this farm kid, he has a big load of cocaine and maybe some maple syrup. We can get some more of this stuff.
Output: I think I'm up for that once I'm well. But I just had a heart attack.
I want to start a new life here in Akron. I want to start over and start fresh.
Output: Absolutely, this is the most refreshing city in the world.
Honey, are you going to drink this or would you like it, sir? You're eyeing it like it's a Christmas stocking full of treats.
Output: This is Clinton. We just met. He's going to sit in the middle seat.
Tim, what is going on with you?
Output: I told you I'm mentally sick. I have been for awhile now.
So, you never got to be on the college improv team.
Output: Well, I would have, but I got called into hell all of a sudden.
What's your name, old timer?
Output: Sassafras. Sassafras Lampshade. I'm part of a Lampshade Dynasty, but I left it to go on the road.
I have two jobs, so I actually only have about 5 minutes to spend here.
Output: At risk of being too forward, you smell like oregano.
You're talking to Bulene, and I'm saying it was an accident.  She wrapped her hands around her throat and she went to town.
Output: All right then.  I'm inclined to trust you girls.  Now, get back on the top bunk, both of you.
Mom, mom? Why shouldn't I wipe my shoes off?
Output: Because everyone should love you for who you are. You shouldn't have to change.
So, Patch is the one that sounds like a woman with a sore throat.
Output: Yea, he's easily the best character on Days of Our Lives.
We have a returning guest with us. I'd like to say he's one of our biggest success stories. I counted seven butt holes on him. How many do you have now, Tim?
Output: I have 12. Wait, is the key to a success story getting the number to go down?
Hello Kay, I am a magical fairy. I have the power of giving you any dream you want. The catch is, no one can know that you attained that dream.
Output: And I can't chose reading, right? That's one of those wish laws?
I feel like nothing can go wrong. You keep singing and drinking and dancing, don't worry about your diabetes. You keep doing what you're doing, too.
Output: Yeah, running a failing newspaper. I'm cool with it.
Wait a minute, this used to be a library.
Output: It did. It used to be a library, but no more. It was my favorite place to be in this town.
I thought you were a mathematical genius, but you appear to not be able to count to seven.
Output: Maybe not when it comes to love and counting human bodies, but when it comes to squares, I am.
You hit that D hard on the cod. I sense some acting training.
Output: I used to act. Now I'm just a waitress.
I've been in here quite some time and when I first got here, I was crisp. I'm not a raggedy tissue by choice.
Output: Right. It's just by circumstance of being in this purse for awhile.
Ca-ching. He's gotta be rich.
Output: I'm fucking rolling in it.
The more tits, the merrier. Look, there's one praying in the corner.
Output: The more, the merrier. Like, if we saw a lady come in here with four tits, I'd be like "They're on the show."
You can't do anything about them smoking and drinking on the field, though, Skip.
Output: That's right, Art. I can't do anything about it unless I become the commissioner of baseball. And then I can run guys like this out of the league altogether.
Your name is Sam Geramano?
Output: Yes, it was misspelled on my birth certificate. The nurse was drunk.
Jared and Joseph, you don't need to pick up those quarters that Dana vomited.
Output: It's free money! We need quarters for laundry!
I am filled with sugar and mist and everything pissed and I won't listen to a word you say..
Output: I am in charge, I am a babysitter, you do as I say or else you are in trouble.
Melissa was wronged. She was stoned by the children.
Output: Right, and she left you. To go to heaven.
That's a chicken right there. That's a talking chicken. That's supposed to be dead 'cause it's in cold storage.?
Output: We're not keeping the place very cold, though.
Malmsteen's most famous hit is probably "Humans Tremble for God has Come to Judge".
Output: I know that one. I love it. I never knew that was Yngwie. I used to sing it back at my bible store.
Mindy, that was a pitch perfect rendition of that song.
Output: Yes, that was beautiful. It was so heartfelt.
We thought you guys were so cool, and then you just ran away once we told you.
Output: We were so scared when you said we were cool, we thought "hold on a second."
You have a good time hanging out with the girls this weekend, hon.
Output: Thanks, baby.  I'll try to come up with a lot of great anecdotes for you when you get back.
Hi, Angie.  I see you still got the same ridiculous hairdo.
Output: Oh, has there been a change in the dictionary?  Does ridiculous mean beautiful now?
Mr. Determen just chastised my dead father.
Output: Well, he's bleeding all over the carpet.
Well, you know what's a distraction?  Elizabeth's webbed chin!
Output: Cynthia, that's not nice.  Now, Elizabeth's been through a lot.  She spent all her money flying to Paris to be your understudy.
I want to resist but I can't. Oh my god, it melted on my tongue like a salty snowflake.
Output: They say each slice of ham is different.
We will be married forever and it will be great.
Output: You really think you're going to be married forever? I'll give you three months tops!
When did this happen?
Output: It was about three hours ago.
Hey, you're covered in eggs.
Output: Yeah, no kidding. That's obscuring the flapjacks, which is the base of what I'm covered with.
Something seems fishy here.
Output: Yeah, that's the processing of the cocaine. We're using fishing emollients to process the cocaine.
I'm not a comedian, but I do like to write down funny things on pads.
Output: That is so cool. That is the coolest thing I've ever heard.
Here's what I say:  may only the guy who didn't get a pointed axe to the skull be still standing! 
Output: May flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!  The readiness is all!
Oh, you had the murder weapon, we didn't have to summon the bailiff for it?
Output: You asked for it every ten minutes. The guy got tired of going back and forth.
I don't know what it is. There's just something about you that comes off as being an ass hole. I wish you'd get some help.
Output: Babe, you are the love of my life. I care about you. You are the sunshine in my fucking life.
This is a secret project and I'm protecting my voice. I'm not going to sound anything like Stanley Kubrick.
Output: That's fine, Mr. Kubrick. I know you're a New Yorker, so I believed it right away. But, now the diclaimer is making me question it.
Alright, I'll just go ahead and pick the lock and hope that we don't get caught by the police.
Output: And if the president finds out that we're stealing his documents, we're in serious trouble.
Suedeface isn't still a baby, is he?
Output: He's a guy now. He hit it big when he was a baby, but he's maintained.
Rudy, you hit .323 in AAA ball, how do you expect that's gonna translate to the bigs?
Output: Well, I mean, I hope that I'm going to do a good job and just play my heart out, have a good attitude, and then maybe I'll make it to the major leagues.
I gotta level with you. Bob, you're a nice person and I'm a secret shopper. I gotta report you for giving me the free apps.
Output: Oh no, but I took pity on you because you're so lonely and sad.
Mr. Mommy. Oh, that has a nice ring to it.
Output: Please, Mr. Mommy was my father's name.
What do you plan on doing to me, sir? The deal with Wachovia is closed.
Output: That deal is closed. I'm proposing a new deal, where my family merges you to death.
You can't call the police because I've been running my business under the table.
Output: And, the sirens will wake up my baby.
Wow, you're stronger than I thought!
Output: Yes, because I am a symbol of love, and love is the greatest strength known to man!
We're just trying to have a fun drug trip.
Output: You're trying to round the edges off on the square.
Hey Fred, our dad is going to take us on a tour of a factory. We're going to take some time out from playing and go look at how a factory works for awhile. 
Output: How exciting! Yes, let's go! I love exploring new things.
Are all the foods smushed together? I don't like my foods to touch.
Output: I don't think you can smush a clam. It has a house it lives in that protects it. And the boiled potato is not boiled to the point of mashing.
I've been telling you about this perp. She comes to all the concerts and claims theirs been a delay. Then she distracts you with all kinds of animal products and animals and then cuts in front of you in the line.
Output: She's been doing this for years.
Let's see, you're a fawn, right?
Output: I'm a fawn, and I'm feeling great!
You want your body implanted into the ground so flat that a call can roll over it and into your mouth.
Output: Yes, and I'd like you, Greg, to putt preferably an orange ball into my mouth.
We're from War Road, Minnesota. It's way up in the Iron Range.
Output: Oh, my. It sounds like a Cormack McCarthy novel, War Road. I'm very learned.
Yeah, we've been getting a lot of bad feedback on Carl.  Other than him, I assume everything else here at Friendly House was good.
Output: Yeah, I loved the food, the atmosphere, and the camaraderie.  I felt understood and part of a community.
Maybe the Lord could have stopped him.
Output: Well, maybe the Lord could have stopped him. That's right. Look, you know what, you guys can keep being mean and offending me based on my Christianity. It's fine.
Wait a minute, are you ElderSpanx69 on ebay? We've bought so many things from you.
Output: That's right. I believe in corporal punishment at every age.
Oh, I miss Greg's. You know, I'm supposed to be at Greg's right now.
Output: I wish you guys would stop talking about Greg's. I bet it's horrible over there.
How much can I get for this ink? It's really high quality.
Output: I'm going to be honest. It's not a whole lot. Here's $1.75.
Cynthia is the boss around here. She drinks bone broth all day and runs the Grand Ole Opry like a Swiss Watch.
Output: That's quite true. Except, I'd never wear Swiss. I'm from England.
I guess you stumbled into the right profession.  Look at all of those mechanic awards in that trophy case.
Output: You've got to love what you do or else why bother going on with life?  You all right, pal?
Aw, shit, another meltdown.
Output: Again? Damn, it's hot in here. Can you feel that?
Mindy, put that rotisserie chicken down and just calm yourself.
Output: OK. I'm sorry. See, there I go again. Everything is my fault.
I have come. Who summons me to this mortal plane?
Output: Hey, Sky God, did you order some fries with a side of punch....in your face?
Listen, I got good news for you. You're a new fireguy. And you, stair witch, you're like the worst person to have in the event of a fire. You make stairs go away. You'll never be a fireguy.
Output: Hey, would wouldn't have realized all this if this stair witched hadn't therapy-d us.
OK, I'm going to go in there.
Output: All right, Sherry. Please, be careful. Make sure you hold your arm out.
God, you're only halfway done creating the universe. When are you going to finish that shit, for real?
Output: See, this is why I never got married in the first place.
I've never seen a chive in the grocery store, but that could, I never go into the produce section of a grocery store because I find it intimidating.
Output: It's very intimidating.  My wife is easily intimidated.
I'm sorry. I'm your downstairs neighbor. Twice a week I have to deal with your wife climbing down outside my window.
Output: My wife is a free spirit. Doesn't she deserve to be free?
He's the pudding phantom.
Output: It turns out the highest thing a phantom can be is haunting two random women that live together inside a pudding cup.
Gregory, do you want to film coming off the Apollo first?
Output: I'll do it. I'm here all day, so whatever you want to do. You just poing me where to go.
Well, as soon as this is over you have a new, fresh life. You deserve way more than what he gave you.
Output: Thank you, Carol.
Why do we have to take our fun time and go learn how to be more effective members of society?
Output: Yeah, it's so abrupt. It's like one minute we're having fun and the next minute we're in a factory.
What a wonderful story. Tell us more about your travels to America.
Output: Well, I decided to go to Miami because I heard the Cuban food and the plantains were delicious. I was doing a new version of myself and my personality. Of more of an artist than a musician.
Just because my voice sounds slightly more gravely, you think I'm older than you guys?
Output: Well, you also have gray hair and long white beard.
Look at those tights. Those tights are stupid. And look at that stupid Tinkerbell. I hope she dies.
Output: Ray, you're ruining this play for everyone.
Because I hear there's other lawyers out there who are saying there's no such thing as vampire lawyers.
Output: How can you do court during the day, though?
OK, well I vote no.
Output: Wow. I didn't see that coming from "the girl."
I've never seen anything like this in my life.  It's gotta be extremely valuable. Yeah. Who is it signed by?
Output: Not any of the Rolling Stones. I think it's signed by Barney Frank. There's gotta be somebody that that hits some buttons for. They're willing to pay top dollar. OK, let's go out and talk to this kid.
We have established we did not see each other.
Output: Our backs were facing one another.
Young lady, do you recall being in New Orleans in the last two years?
Output: Yes, I brought you back on my back. You hugged me and then I brought you back to this time period.
Old man Timmons is watching you, so stop dropping cups and help this lady with her Chihuahua Margarita.
Output: I just got a little flustered that I've been calling you by the wrong name.
What happened in there, dad?
Output: Well, I hope you have the rest of the afternoon cleared, because I'm going to be on The Price is Right.
If you want to serve a cow, have it's older friend and uncle the buffalo.
Output: What if I want to serve a buffalo?
What do you have that doesn't have dairy in it or soy?
Output: Huh, we have um. Toppings? I can give you some sprinkles for 89 cents.
Look, if anybody's ready to order, I'm waiting.
Output: I feel it's only right if we step aside so the birthday girl can order.
You probably know this song. It's an English Country classic.
Output: Yes, it's called Lamp Shade as a Hat. I love that song.
Gross tic tac, I'm never going to eat you. I'm just going to let you get all the lint off the bottom.
Output: Yeah, I wouldn't recommend eating me either. It's gotten pretty bad.
This Excalibur 2000 is one great machine.
Output: It was worth the 89 thousand dollars my husband spent on it.
I think that she's actually married to Gwenyth Paltrow's dad. That's my big problem.
Output: It's a lie. I never loved him. I don't know where you would get that from.
But I'd seen it done in a much smaller sphere than I built. It should have worked even better.
Output: It was a closed course. Professional drivers.
Have you heard the original song?
Output: It's a snore. It's a bore and a snore.
Welcome to the council meeting. We are the Televangiles. We have called this special session at the request of Reverent St. Augustine.
Output: I hope this is important. I was working on a puzzle.
Vinnie Jones has a name like a poor guy, but he made a bunch of money beating people up or something.
Output: He also picked some pockets, too.
My god. I see tomatoes and potatoes. What is it?
Output: It's not a pie, it's spaghetti.
No, that's the thing, it happens just like that. It's called Spontaneonation combustion.
Output: Oh, my God. That's terrifying branding. I might rethink this gig.
You are Steve, the American baker. Everyone knows about you.
Output: Well, I mean, I'd like to think so. I do have a commercial out there.
I've never been on a bus. I wanted to be on a bus.
Output: So, wait. You have the ability to inhabit a tree or inhabit a person, but you had to take a bus here?
Hey, listen, let me ask you something. Do you think I gotta shot at making it to the bigs?
Output: You might get a cup of coffee in the bigs, but that's about it. This is A ball right now. Then you gotta go to triple A ball, then you gotta go down to double A ball. Then you gotta go up to the majors. I got a cup of coffee back in the '60s.
I'm still here. I just wanted to help our ghosts buddies out.
Output: Oh, you're such a giver, Terry.
What about colored stones for our new inventory? People enjoy that. Like ruby or sapphire.
Output: We've been doing colored stones since the dawn of god damn time.
We're just two lonely people from the wrong side of the tracks. You know, we didn't think we were worthy of your whipped cream.
Output: Every side of the tracks is the right side to Budino.
Once again, I want to point out that you shop at a human meat market.
Output: The whole point I go there is it's the best source of human bones. There's no need for the humans bones to go to waste. Why should those people have died in vain?
So, Terry, you're single?
Output: Yeah, you know. It's hard to lay someone down when you got to travel to so many Burger Kinds and McDonald's across the country.
At ease everybody. No need to salute me just because I'm so well decorated.
Output: Look at this guy. He's got fruit salad on his jacket and scrambled eggs on his cap.
How about the Ice berg or the berg?
Output: That will make people think of the Titanic. It's very sad. There's nothing funny about the Titanic.
I've been cutting your hair for 92 minutes.
Output: To be fair, it's only taken 92 minutes because the first 45 you were looking at the photo I brought and you were confused.
Stop talking. We paid a lot of money for these tickets.
Output: Oh, you're a dummy then.
I'm an afterlife recycle doula.
Output: I guess you can get anything from Task Rabbit. Who knew you could actually find an afterlife recycle doula?
Best Buy throws out day old laptops. They don't want to keep them.
Output: Yeah, I've seen the expiration stickers.
It sounds like an MC Escher drawing.
Output: Oh, yeah! Yeah, it's just like that.
You're Rumpledumpskin?
Output: That's right, and I'll grant you three wishes!
Those nine girls are my nieces.
Output: Wow, that's complicated.
I was raised by chickens.
Output: That's so sad, but I do hear they are great hug recipients.
Toby, I want you to tell this giraffe horse something you like about her.
Output: I'm called a hiraffe. I had a lot of laughs.
It's OK, Nooky. We're not mad.
Output: I really thought I could help, but I realized those are heavy boxes.
Jamal! That's my name too.
Output: OK, you're just light skinned. I didn't know.
I almost got found out at work today. They almost found out that I don't have tentacles.
Output: Listen, I told you to wear that special sweater.
I just got the new iPhone SS. It's a super sport.
Output: It's working! I changed the iPhone Wikipedia entry last week. They renamed the phone.
Hey, you gotta get it back and reattach it. That prosthetic has been in the mouth of too many pups.
Output: I tried to catch it, okay, but once you've got my prosthetic I am severely hindered.
Correct me if I'm wrong. You don't care about kids.
Output: I don't give a shit about kids. But our baby is going to be different. No more sociopaths in my family.
Sit still, rookie. This is gonna hurt a lot.
Output: You shouldn't have told him that.
It felt like a hate crime from where I was standing.
Output: I could have sworn he just came from work and that's why he's dressed like that.
That guy just beat up a cop.
Output: He threw a rock and knocked out a cop.
Hey, you guys, I just squeezed some fresh goat milk. Do you want some?
Output: No. See, you told me where it was from. I don't want it.
Is that how you're going to do the part?  You sound like a crazy person!
Output: You sound like somebody that keeps stepping on a child's toy.
Gentlemen, I realize my mistake. We was asking what was optimal temperature, but we forgot to ask was it the optimal temperature for human or chickens??
Output: Oh, I got egg on my face 'cause I thought you meant me.
Michael, I hope they make a movie about our story one day.
Output: I hope they make it about our brave, twin story. There aren't enough stories out there about kids with STDs, forced to do highway work.
Stop throwing paper clips at me!
Output: You look like a bionic person, but you don't have no skills.
It's really tense here most of the time. I'm glad you're here.
Output: Have you two thought about seeing a counselor?
I predict I'll probably be doing this job for the rest of my life.
Output: See, you found your thing and I found my thing. Isn't that great? I feel like we have that focus in common.
Here ma'am, have a sip out of my flask. This is "kid juice."
Output: Oh, that seems a little odd, but since you're with the park, I guess it's alright.
I advance towards you one stilt at a time.
Output: I recoil at first, because I'm used to it, but then something tells me to let it happen.
What is it, a scientific souffle?
Output: Technically cooking is science, so yes it is a scientific souffle.
Arlene, don't get the coyote to come into the house. Little Donald is upstairs.
Output: Little Donald will be fine, OK? This is not a dingo. It don't eat babies.
I mean, I don't think it's serious. I haven't been to the doctor. I don't really believe in doctors.
Output: What do you mean? Is it a religious thing? Or you don't believe they exist?
Anus, it's no coincidence that I happened to meet you at the Downy train station. I know who you are and what you've done to my family.
Output: So, this whole funeral is a ruse. I guess there's no one in this casket.
I made signs with with his face on it.
Output: I've seen one of those signs. It just says "my husband's  gone". There's no number or anything.
How much do you have sir I can see you want to buy it.
Output: I've got umm just this piece of string so can I brorrow the money from you?
Now, your headshot is pretty professional, but based on your behavior I'm going to say you're actually not.
Output: It's an iPhone 7 Plus. I used the depth feature.
I'm going to close the lid of the listening tank. If anything at all goes wrong you need to jump out of the tank.
Output: Right out of the tank and into your arms. Got it.
Sir, are you suggesting you're doing me a favor? That you're doing me a favor by going into the football game without me paying you?
Output: Yeah. What's a football game without fans?
Just the usual? But Miranda, it's your birthday. Don't you want to do something special?
Output: It just seems like everyone in my life has forgotten my birthday today. Including me.
I think that the gang is falling apart. I think that they're battling against their leader, the little Episcopalian one in there.
Output: That's the one that robbed the pet store. You can tell because he's an ugly boy.
Well, if Crystal Light believes in you, then I believe in Dark Crystal, too.
Output: Oh, that's good. I was really expecting an argument.
Hello, are you from Melbourne?
Output: Yeah, I'm from Melbourne and Australia.
Get out of my sight! And find me the best eggs fit for a hotel!
Output: Okay. But you can't fire us, because we have a very strong union.
We were wondering if you would come to to the museum. We have an ant problem in our painting.
Output: Oh yeah, sure. I've done a lot of work in paintings. I dealt with the Francis Bacon one with the weird dog.
Gretchen left. She didn't like our rendition.
Output: She didn't like your spoof?
Renee, that sounds like a woman's name. I won't hit a woman and I'm not about to start by giving them cancer.
Output: All this time later and people still aren't hitting women? It's 2058 already.
Oh, my god. The grandma from Family Matters is here.
Output: Estelle. Her name is Estelle.
Like the original Little Mermaid in Hans Christian Andersen's takes. They say every step felt like walking on scissors.
Output: It's a little like that. This one feels like you're at the dentist getting drilled all over your body. Not in a good way.
Look, you said you were two weeks from retirement a month ago. Why are you still even here?
Output: I came back to clean up this mess you and your partner got us into. Now the department says you're suspended.
Dennis and I have made a very dramatic decision.
Output: It includes fucking by the way, but we're also going to start dancing. Join us everybody.
Listen, every year we're entitled to that person pan pizza in Cedar Rapids. It's the Pizza Hut main headquarters.
Output: It's the only place where Pizza Hut is still a sit down restaurant. That salad bar is delicious.
Hey, you stupid dog, you lack opposable thumbs.
Output: Yeah, you're dumb. You can't type and you don't even know what a spreadsheet is, stupid.
We should get out of this room.
Output: We should. The killer is right behind you.
Can I ask you, Timothy, what was you going to ask that chicken but you literally chickened out??
Output: Oh, I never even thought of that. I was gonna ask that chicken what it thought of me.
Attention it is us the presidents so sorry that we have been in hiding for so long.
Output: They have been hiding so long they aren't even the presidents anymore they just don't know it yet.
Don't mean to interrupt, but the camper's are arriving, and you two have been behind the honesty tree for a good half hour.
Output: OK, Beth, well, we're doing some honesty here. Give us a little more time.
I want to make a good impression on the other players and the watchers.
Output: Oh, the people watching from the bleachers? Yes, the spectators.
I drove here, well actually my mom drove me here.
Output: She really did didn't she, look!  There she is outside!
Kyle has something to say to all of us.
Output: I just want to say that I'm a sociopath and all I care about is myself and my own fortunes. If there's a way that Melissa can be in a relationship and still maintain a successful business, I'd be OK with that.
You're like a book that's yet to be opened. What's your story?
Output: Who me? What's my story? Tim Jimson? My story isn't all that interesting.
Melissa was a wonderful woman.
Output: I know, and she was wronged. She was stoned by the children.
I didn't know that you had such a big heart.
Output: That's right. That's why they call me Hearty. Back home. That's what the boys call me.
Anything we can get you?
Output: No, but my sister is supposed to come see me today, she's a big newscaster.
Caroline, these last forty eight hours have meant the world to me. Would you do me the great honor of becoming my wife?
Output: I would be honored. It would be a great honor we would both be doing for one another.
I drove here, if that makes a difference on if you like me or not.
Output: It does because we like to be pedestrians because we're from New York.
I have fantastic legs. I shave them.
Output: They are smooth and very silky.
Mommy's going to do her TJ Maxx run. You go and run in the bushes at the park.
Output: OK. Mommy, will I be able to play with ghosts in the haunted amusement park?
Happy anniversary, Vivian. I can't believe it's been three weeks since we got married.
Output: Happy anniversary, Shaun. It's the most beautiful three weeks of my life. I feel like I can almost feel.
Kay, can you come into the office? The sign on the Steinways, they're very hard to read.
Output: I put lot of extra curls on the letters.
I thought that was a dog.
Output: Once you taste this milk, you won't think that again.
Wait, I need to understand something. Big Red, you're our pimp. So that little fella's your pimp?
Output: Of course, there's a chain of command, baby.
Do I have time to go to the bathroom?
Output: What's that? You need to go to the bathroom? I don't have time to talk to you. I gotta go around and tell everyone that we have ten minutes until the Grand Ole Opry starts.
I've never seen a man waddle with his cock out.
Output: Oh, you didn't see the high school captain? He's done stuff.
The robe should be closed until I say it's time to disrobe, but. That's OK.
Output: It was really chafing me.
Who wouldn't want to be from here? This is the home to most of the places that a gator has killed someone in America.
Output: That is true. We do boast that statistic.
Would you like to pray before you go into the doctor's office?
Output: I think that's a fantastic idea. We haven't prayed ever.
No kidding, mom. You have been somewhere else all day.
Output: Sorry we're so late picking you up from the ocean.
You know what I want to try? A fruit salad sandwich.
Output: Oh, this cook, he could make anything. All you have to do is ask him. He did something with a starfruit once and it blew my mind.
You're going to go back and make your mother cut back on the wine spritzers and get her a prosthetic hand that looks decent. 
Output: I will do what you ask, your majesty. Thank you for spring my life.
Oh aren't you two a handsome couple.
Output: Well, thank you. This is our one marriage. We just got married.
We're worried about your disheveled appearance. There are regulations and laws about wearing clothes, Gwyneth.
Output: All I can say is that babies are born naked and I would ask you all to consider that before you ask me to put on clothes.
I can't eat pudding one more god damn time.
Output: I know, I asked for pizza today, but the pudding guy just keeps showing up.
Dirt God, you did it. You got the lady down here.
Output: I sure did. I'm holding her esophagus right now.
So are these paintings for sale or what?
Output: As I said before, these are all for sale.
Honey, I bought you a new car.
Output: Again?
The doctor told me 13 minutes ago that I have 15 minutes.
Output: OK. I can wait 2 minutes to go pee then.
If you are not going to finish the fortune cookie, you shouldn't get the fortune.
Output: Objection! Oh, wait, we can appeal.
I just ask his guy if he's a comedian and he said no.
Output: He's not a comedian? Sometimes they lie. I still think he is.
I shouldn't have eaten so many hot dogs before we got on the dance floor. I feel kind of queasy.
Output: You're turning white!
Now that you mention it, I don't either. I thought it was your idea.
Output: I thought it was your idea. This is like that time we went to Lake Tahoe.
Curtis, I love you so much.
Output: I love you too - I want to say, Marjorie?
Larry, I gotta let you go. Clyde, I gotta let you go too.
Output: Who let's the Big Toppers go? We're the Big Top brothers.
Why don't you just wring out your shirt?
Output: Really, Clark? Well, that's mean. I'm just a piece of meat to you?
I'm trying to find the perfect people for this cast. Jim that ran it last year is going around town saying that I'm not going to make it. I'm going to make it, Delores. You know I'm going to make it.
Output: Janice, I know. I get it. I got it. I'm here for you.
There's a woman in the way. Doctor, what's wrong with him? Will he ever recover?
Output: Ma'am. The lady is the doctor. He is a doctor, but he's not the doctor.
Hey, Dracula.  You killed my whole family.
Output: Oh, look at you.  A townsfolk.  You think I'm scared of you?
I can drink with the best of 'em. Here, have one. They're fizzle-snitzes.
Output: Are you a representative of the colonial government here on planet LV-whatever it is?
Okay, I'm very tormented as a member of the Swiss Guard to go along with this terrible plan.?
Output: I'm going to have spank you with this crucifix just to get you to do this again, huh?
Who does this President think she is?
Output: That's an excellent question. You're right. Our rights are being trampled on, just like that snake on that flag.
You know me, I fall in love so quickly.
Output: You certainly do. You've had many loves over the year that you've met at this garden.
It makes sense because when I was going to have you, my water broke and so you came forth like a raging water full of carbonation.
Output: That's where I get my fighting spirit.
Let's see what we have in here. There's a chair, bunks, there's an old broom.
Output: Can't you two keep it down? I'm trying to sleep. What a terrible sister you are.
Fine. Fifty dollars each. A wall, some stairs. The list is getting long.
Output: It's my birthday.
She's pretty good at hiding being a robot, but what about that whole story with her cousin Vinny?
Output: Yeah, and she says water can't get on her skin. She must perspire. That's how the body stays cool.
But look how melty the clocks are in this painting. This really is tremendous.
Output: Oh and look at the giraffe burning in the back.
Welcome to the potato farm. Are you enjoying the tour of the potato crops?
Output: Yeah, it's earthy.
So, you understand about barn parties do you? You understand what it takes to have the perfect ingredients for a rockin' good time?
Output: Of course, they are: drums, cows, plywood.
I haven't even got my learner's permit.
Output: They have schools for that. They're called driving schools. Also, don't they have driver's ed. at your school?
I see the driver is not in this vehicle and you're parked in a handicapped. I don't see a handicap sticker so you're going to have to move to another spot.
Output: I've got a bum leg, my leg doesn't work so good.
Hello, I just gotta move these boxes over to another stack over there.
Output: I'm here to help you. Don't worry. I got your back.
Yeah, so that was tough for you, right? I had to lie about when things were all of the time.
Output: Yeah, you just told me the story about when you lied about your pants.
I've been trying to look away but I can't.
Output: I keep following you. As your head moves my head moves.
Spray some of that stuff on Rufus' paws. He loves it.
Output: He does. It's the only thing he loves in this world anymore.
Obviously, we smoked during the games. This is 60's. But I thought, like, you couldn't drink you know, on the field.
Output: What, are you listening to Skip? Don't listen to him. He's a real straight shooter.
You! I can't believe it. I banned you from the McCormick place.
Output: I've been thinking about that a lot lately, actually, in the last few seconds since we first mentioned your place. And I actually feel really guilty about that. In fact, I'm mortified.
Rumplepiltdown, it just seems like a high price to pay.
Output: What's the big deal? I'm just asking you to serve me.
How long will it be your birthday? How much time do I have? You're not one of those where it stretches into 2 day birthdays, are you?
Output: Her labor was very intense. She was born at 11:00 am. I stand behind her often because I want her to shine.
What can we do? The people have spoken. They want digital photographs. They already exist and they've been using them for awhile.
Output: What if we do 30 minute photos? We'll work extra hard and get them done faster. We'll double our effort.
So, how will we know what to do when the salesman shows up?
Output: Oh, you'll know what to do. There will be an operative, who will be there and explain everything.
Hey man, get a load of this. They're really going or it.
Output: They really are. Hey, that's my wife down there.
What are we going to do? I feel like any minute, we're going to be crushed by these rival hill people.
Output: If only something would come that could blow the hill people away.
A lot of people complain about the sound of my voice. That's actually why I got into stick-ups. I thought maybe I'd get discovered by a voice-over agent.
Output: By robbing them?
We have to get into the mind of the snake. The snake is just as scared as we are.
Output: Oh, everybody knows that about the snake. St. Patrick taught us that.
Oh my god, I just walked in and I heard you say that. That's, like, so profound.
Output: You should do stand-up hour. We need more women in stand-up.
He pulled the old double talk on me. He doubled everything I said, but he just changed the pronouns.
Output: He changed the "you"s to "me" and "I".
So, this is Narnia. I came all the way from Alabama.
Output: Wow. I came all the way from Antarctica or the Arctic.
Guys, I don't want to interrupt, but you've pinned me between you and the wall of glasses.
Output: You just stay there. I want you to witness this.
What were you screaming about over there behind the couch??
Output: We just uh... we just talking about, uh, temperatures. You know how in Europe they got different temperatures than here.
Hello there Devin.
Output: Hey, how's it going buddy? Y'all went to go see a movie or something, didn't you?
Do you know, I put butter on our steps every night, but, somehow, I don't know if it's because he wears his golf cleats in the house, but, he always makes it up the stairs.
Output: Oh, they learned that in, like, middle school or something.  I don't know.  They get taught how to braid their pubes and wear cleats everywhere.
You should go talk to Roger, Donna. You're the Executive Producer.
Output: I know and I never asked to be this. I don't know how I got this job.
Well I'm going in and I'll see what happens.
Output: All right I guess that is the best we can do fresh fish I did it in the seventies so I think you will be ok.
You got much smaller. Is that why they call you Rumplepiltdown?
Output: That's right. I just gotta piltdown every once in awhile.
How do you know Dakota?
Output: Oh, we're sisters.
I'm going to spin the Wheel of Fortune. One, two, whee. Come on, big money.
Output: Here we go. It is stopping. Coming to a stop, and, big money! You won the Wheel of Fortune!
I didn't like that you were whispering sweet nothings to Luigi like that.?
Output: Well, he was so angry and full of rage.  The only way I know in my village to deal with someone like this is to treat them like a stray dog who has never known compassion, and then you smother them with love until they have no choice but to submit.
Do you want to go back to the past again? And do it over again for a third time?
Output: I'm getting concerned I'm using up all the power in your yo-yo, but, let's do it.
All right, Johnny, you've got to make sure that everything's OK here. I'm off to have sex with my ex-wife. The best kind of sex.
Output: OK, well listen. I got a guitar, I gotta a can-do attitude, and I'm real small. Any suggestions?
Oh! He threw the egg on the wall of this Kipton's Suites!
Output: Yes! And I'll do it again and put a frame around it!
So, you're not accusing me of wrongdoing, it's like I'm just working your side of the street?
Output: Yeah, stay in your lane, David.
Now, Judy, those turned out to be actors that you hired to back up your claims. They spoke in a very theatrical manner.
Output: She spends her money how she wants to spend her money.
I have a mentor here at the Home Depot. Sometimes when I'm feeling low, I go to her. Would you want to go meet her?
Output: Is she over in the blinds area?
Vivi, we just got a huge order of knick knackeries. 
Output: Oh, we're finally going to sell all of our knick knackeries.
The wheelchair thing was a big thing that bothered my daughter.
Output: Well, 'cause it wasn't a motorized wheelchair, and you insisted that she either push you or wait for you as you sort of like, shuffled with your feet. And also, you can walk.
Is that John Wiki?
Output: Yep, he invented Wikipedia.
I didn't even bother to try the audition, Beverly. You're the queen of the bite and chew.
Output: That commercial got me insurance. I haven't been able to go to the doctor for 15 years.
Like a cat has nine lives. And the swans, they become incorporeal spirits who are reborn again four times again.
Output: Everything around here lives four lifetimes.
So, I'm your son, Tranese?
Output: Yes, doesn't it all make sense? We do all the same things the same way.
Yeah, I'm saying it's unusual to be in a club of unemployed people. I mean, have you heard of it before?
Output: Yeah, I drive by tent cities that are kind of clubs of unemployed people.
You can't not marry Evelyn just because of your secret. You're in love with her.
Output: Yeah and we do need one more person on the board.
My show is about a character that I play telling the story of a show he saw.
Output: OK. So, you're just taking an existing play and telling the story of going to see it.
It's a real shame our girlfriends bailed out on our foursome idea.
Output: You know, Pete, when I think about you and I and our girlfriends, I just think to myself "who needs it?"
It's like a free piercing. Free piercing with Christ.
Output: I should bring that up at the next church meeting. It'd be a great way to get people in the door.
Come on, get over here. Sit on my knees.
Output: I'm a grown man. Aw, alright.
We don't talk about the Great Fire Murder State Fair Murder Fire of 1937
Output: He's right. We never talk about it. I guess you had to be there.
It's Papa. Pa-pa. Is that so hard?
Output: It's very hard. That's a weird name. Especially for a woman.