Reed Martin:  When it came to comedy , Shakespeare was a genius at borrowing and adapting plot devices from different theatrical traditions .
Austin Tichenor: These influences include the Roman plays of Plautus and Terence , Ovid 's " Metamorphoses " - which are hysterically funny .
Austin Tichenor: As
Austin Tichenor: well as the rich Italian tradition of commedia dell'arte .
Adam Long: Yeah , basically Shakespeare stole every comedy he ever wrote .
Austin Tichenor: Oh , no , no . " Stole " is a little strong ; " distilled " , maybe .
Adam Long: Yeah , okay , well he " distilled " the three or four funniest comic gimmicks of his time and then he milked them into sixteen plays .
Reed Martin: Yeah . You see , basically Shakespeare was a formula writer . Once he found a device that worked , he used it
Reed Martin, Austin Tichenor, Adam Long: Over and over and over again .
Reed Martin: So , Mr. Shakespeare , the question we have is this ...
Reed Martin, Austin Tichenor, Adam Long: Why did you write sixteen comedies when you could have written just _ one _ ?
Austin Tichenor: Well , in answer to this question , we of the Reduced Shakespeare Company have taken the liberty of condensing all sixteen of Shakespeare 's comedies into a single play , which we have entitled " The Comedy of Two Well - Measured Gentlemen Lost in the Merry Wives of Venice on a Midsummer 's Twelfth Night in Winter " .
Adam Long: Or ...
Reed Martin: " Cymbeline Taming Pericles the Merchant In the Tempest of Love As Much As You Like It For Nothing " .
Adam Long: Or ...
Reed Martin, Austin Tichenor, Adam Long: " Four Weddings and a Transvestite " .
Reed Martin: Ahem
Reed Martin: . Act I. A Spanish duke swears an oath of celibacy and turns the rule of his kingdom over to his sadistic and tyrannical twin brother . He learns some fantastical feats of magic and sets sail for the golden age of Greece , along with his daughters - three beautiful and virginal sets of identical twins . While rounding the hill of Italy , the duke 's ship is caught in a terrible tempest , which , in its fury , casts the duke upon a desert island , along with the loveliest and most virginal of his daughters , who stumbles into a cave , where she is molested by a creature who is either a man or fish or both .
Adam Long: Act II . The long lost sons of the duke 's brother - also , coincidentally , three sets of identical twins - have just arrived in Italy . Though still possessed of an inner nobility , they are ragged , destitute , penniless , flea - infested shadows of the men they once were , and in the utmost extremity are forced to borrow money from an old Jew who deceives them into putting down their brains as collateral on the loan . Now , the six brothers fall in love with six Italian sisters , three of whom are contentious , sharp - tongued little shrews , while the other three are submissive , airheaded little bimbos .
Austin Tichenor: Act
Austin Tichenor: III . The ship wrecked , the identical daughters of the duke wash up on the shores of Italy , disguise themselves as men , become pages to the shrews and matchmakers to the duke 's brother 's sons . They lead all the lovers into a nearby forest , where , on a midsummer 's night , a bunch of mischievous fairies squeeze the aphroditic juice of a hermaphroditic flower into the shrews ' eyes , causing them to fall in love with their own pages , who , in turn , have fallen in love with the duke 's brother 's sons , while the queen of the fairies seduces a jackass , and they all have an orgy .
Reed Martin, Austin Tichenor, Adam Long: Act IV .
Reed Martin: The elderly fathers of the Italian sisters , finding their daughters missing , dispatch messages to the pages to kill any man in the vicinity .
Adam Long: However , unable to find men in the forest , the faithful messengers , in a final misguided act of loyalty , deliver the messages to each other and kill themselves .
Austin Tichenor: Meanwhile , the fish creature and the duke arrive in the forest disguised as Russians , and , for no apparent reason , perform a two - man underwater version of " Uncle Vanya " .
Output: REFERENCE comedies