Fact1: Paul is fired from job at wine shop, Fact2: couple are left with barely enough money to get by and despair, Fact3: apartment building is regular site of swinger parties, Fact4: men After decide to have new lock installed on apartment finding flyer for cheap lock-installation on car, Fact5: Raoul Mendoza uses service as scam enabling him to rob homes of customers
Output: Paul Bland is a wine dealer and his wife, Mary is a nurse. The couple bemoan their low status in unsatisfying jobs, and dream of opening a restaurant. An exceptionally prudish couple, they sleep in separate beds and disapprove of sex, except for a little hugging and kissing. After Paul is fired from his job at a wine shop, the couple are left with barely enough money to get by, and despair that they will ever realize their dream. Their plight is exacerbated by the fact that they live in an apartment building that is a regular site of swinger parties, which they despise. When a drunk swinger wanders into their apartment and tries to rape Mary, Paul furiously kills him by hitting him on the head with a heavy frying pan. They take his money and put him in the trash incinerator. Later, they kill another swinger in a similar fashion, and realize that they could make money by killing rich perverts. They get advice on infiltrating the swinger community from one of the buildings orgy regulars, Doris the Dominatrix. Mary lures men by promising to satisfy their sexual fetishes, and when they try to have sex with her, the otherwise timid Paul becomes alarmed enough to kill them with the frying pan. After finding a flyer for cheap lockinstallation on their car, they decide that for the safety of Pauls wine collection, to have a new lock installed on their apartment. The locksmith is Raoul Mendoza, who uses the service as a scam enabling him to rob the homes of his customers. Using his own key, he sneaks into the Blands apartment the following night, and stumbles across the corpse of the Blands latest victim, a Nazi fetishist. Paul catches Raoul, and with each in a compromising position, they strike a deal: Raoul will keep the Blands secret and dispose of the bodies, which he says he can exchange for cash. The Blands are surprisingly successful at their scheme. While attending a swinger party in search of victims, Paul loses his temper and throws a bug zapper into the hot tub, killing all of the partygoers at once. Suspicious of Raoul, Paul discovers that he has been selling the bodies to a dog food company, and – unbeknownst to Paul and Mary – selling the victims expensive cars and keeping the money. One night, Marys client, Mr. Baker, doesnt show up, so Paul leaves to buy groceries and a new frying pan, since Mary is a bit squeamish about cooking with the one we use to kill people, leaving her alone. However the client arrives late, refuses to accept Marys protest that he missed his appointment, and tries to rape her. Raoul happens to arrive, and strangles the client with his belt. Raoul then offers Mary marijuana and they have sex. They sleep together again, and Raoul tries to persuade Mary to run away with him. He tries to run Paul over with a car, who responds by hiring Doris the Dominatrix to use her costuming and roleplaying experience help get rid of him. She poses as an immigration agent threatening Raoul with deportation, and a public health worker who gives him pills that are secretly saltpeter, to render him sexually impotent. These schemes dont work, and a drunken Raoul breaks into the Blands apartment and threatens to kill Paul. He informs Paul that he and Mary will be getting married, and he takes Paul into the kitchen so that he and Mary can kill him together; instead, Mary kills Raoul with the frying pan. Mary and Paul suddenly remember that their real estate agent who is helping them buy their dream restaurant is due to arrive soon for dinner. With no meat in the house, and little time before his arrival, they cook Raoul and serve him for dinner, describing the dish as Spanish. The last shot of the film is a smiling Paul and Mary in front of their new restaurant, with the caption, Bon Appetit.