Topic: relationship-dissolution

Question: Should I give him another chance?
After my fiancé cheated on me because of a miscommunication, I pulled myself away from him.    Now he says all he wants is be with me. I'm pushing him away mentally now because he cheated on me again. I make plans with him that I don't keep. I really do love him still and I care about him. Should I give home one more chance?

Answer (from Donald Spencer):

Answer (from Sherry Katz, LCSWCouples and Family Therapist, LCSW):
People don't cheat bc of miscommunication.   People cheat bc they feel diminished regard for their partner.You pulling away doesn't explain his behavior.If the two of you still were a couple at the time he cheated on you, then there were many alternatives he cold have taken besides disrespecting you.Try to understand whether you are satisfied and happy in the relationship.  Your actions sound as though you are not either of these.Whether or not you decide to be together again many depend too on if the trust you had in him is restored.  Do you feel you can trust him again?If the two of discuss your relationship then if you don't trust him right now and the both of you talk about your dynamics, then tell him about your feelings.Trust is foundational to feeling safe and happy in a relationship.