natgillin/translations-raw huggingface dataset:
Every person defines this in their own way, and one of the sisters in the residence hall told me this was the problem, that every person defined God in their own way.
To sicer vsak po svoje definira in ena od sester v domu mi je rekla, da je ravno to narobe, da vsak po svoje definira Boga.
For me personally God is love and their (Church) definition seems only partly right to me.
Meni osebno je Bog ljubezen in njihova (cerkvena) definicija mi je le delno pravilna.
While staying with the Ursuline Sisters, Natalija had personal spiritual guidance.
Pri sestrah v domu je imela Natalija osebno duhovno vodenje.
Together with her personal guide she tried out various practices from reading the Bible to various prayers:
Skupaj z osebnim vodnikom je preizkušala različne prakse, od branja odlomkov iz Biblije do različnih molitev:
“… I was doing it for a while, and then I realised that the rosary worked best for me.
»… nekaj časa sem to že delala, potem pa sem videla, da mi najbolj koristi rožni venec.
This is not a prayer for the stupid.
To ni molitev za neumne.
When you're doing it for a while, it starts working.
Potem si res pomirjen in je kot neke vrste meditacija.
All the time Natalija was feeling something she described as her “personal problem” - suspiciousness and doubt.
Vseskozi pa jo je spremljalo nekaj, kar je Natalija opisala kot »moj osebni problem«- sumničavost in dvom.
She therefore suggested to her spiritual guide to change their mutual relationship so that Natalija would prepare questions, and the guide formulate answers.
Duhovni vodnici je torej predlagala, naj bi vzajemno delovanje spremenili tako, da bi Natalija oblikovala vprašanja, vodnica pa odgovore.
The majority of questions were related to the accumulation of material goods, which Natalija noticed in the Church and could not in any way relate to the Church doctrine.
Največ vprašanj se je nanašalo na kopičenje materialnih dobrin, ki ga je Natalija opazila v cerkvi in ga nikakor ni mogla povezati s cerkveno doktrino.
She also noticed some other problems within the Church system:
V cerkvenem sistemu je opazila tudi nekaj drugih težav:
“I think theology students are not mature enough for their vocation.
»Sama mislim, da so študenti bogoslovja premalo zreli za poklicanost.
They don't know where to turn, they're too young… Even Jesus started in his middle age.
Saj še sami ne vejo, kako in kaj, ker so premladi… Tudi Jezus je začel v svojih srednjih letih.
This vocation differs from others; it's different from being a mechanic or a teacher, for instance.
Ta poklic je drugačen od drugih poklicev, mehanika ali pa profesorja na primer.
The boys aren‘t mature enough to be true spiritual shepherds.
Fantje niso dovolj zreli, da bi bili resnični duhovni pastirji.
They have knowledge and study hard, but what's happening in the Church nowadays is the consequence of them entering the Church ranks too young.”
Saj znajo in naštudirajo, kar pa se dogaja v današnji cerkvi, ima izvor v tem, da prehitro vstopajo v cerkveno formacijo.
“To some it's important, to others it isn't.
Pomen vere med mladimi pa je po njenih besedah različen:
Those visiting the Catholic Centre consider faith important.
»Enim je pomembna, drugim ni.
Others, outside the Centre, don't.
Tisti, ki hodijo na katoliški center, imajo vero za pomembno.
Young people at the Centre come from Catholic families, for them
Drugim, tistim izven centra, pa ni.
Others again take it more as a joke.
Vera je bolj zasebna stvar.
“There simply comes a time when everybody turns to God.
»Za vsakega pač pride čas, ko se obrne na boga.
It most often happens when there's a crisis, and also when you're doing very well in life...
To se največkrat zgodi, ko nastopi kriza, pa tudi, kot ti gre zelo dobro v življenju… Glej, tako dobro mi gre, zakaj se mi to dogaja?
Look, I'm doing so well, why is this happening to me?
To je pri meni osnovni izvor dobrega počutja.
14.21 Sabina, 22, former addict
14.21 Sabina, 22 let, nekdanja odvisnica
Sabina says she was born in a socially burdened environment; her parents are retired now, but used to work in the failed Maribor Textile Factory.
Sabina zase pravi, da je bila rojena v socialno obremenjenem okolju, starši so zdaj v pokoju, zaposleni pa so bili v propadlem podjetju MTT (Mariborska tekstilna tovarna).
She has an elder brother, who is on methadone therapy in order to get rid of a long-lasting heroin addiction.
Ima starejšega brata, ki je vključen v metadonsko terapijo, s pomočjo katere naj bi se ozdravil dolge heroinske odvisnosti.
Her brother lives with his girlfriend, and they support themselves mostly with welfare benefit.
Brat živi s punco, preživljata pa se po večini s pomočjo socialne podpore.
Sabina has lived in Maribor all her life.
Sabina že vse svoje življenje živi v Mariboru.
As a child she spent most of her time with friends, and her family situation was rather good.
Kot otrok je večino časa preživljala s prijatelji, stanje v družini pa je bilo še kar dobro.
When
Pri štirinajstih je začela
she turned 14, she started spending more and more time in the street, and her parents did not seem too upset.
tudi sama vedno več časa preživljati na cesti, staršev pa to ni preveč vznemirilo.
In that period they got a divorce because of the escalating fights:
V tem času so se zaradi vse pogostejših in hujših prepirov tudi ločili:
“There was no love; they didn't get along at all.
»Ni bilo nobene ljubezni in sploh se nista ujela.
This had a devastating effect on me.
To je na mene strašno vplivalo.
They were totally splitting me up.
Popolnoma sta me razdvojila.
They both wanted me to feel sorry for them, and they both wanted me to live with them.
Oba sta se mi hotela potem še smiliti in oba sta hotela, da živim pri njima.
The situation was killing me psychologically, and I started to torture myself physically.
Počutila sem se krivo za to, kar se je zgodilo.
The divorce took a long time.
Ločitev je trajala zelo dolgo.
Her father moved out, and Sabina stayed with her mother.
Oče se je odselil in Sabina je ostala z mamo.
Her father was drinking and her mother insisted Sabina should live with her:
Oče je pil in mama je vztrajala, da zato Sabina živi pri njej:
“She wanted me to live with her, although I've always had a better relationship with my father.
»Hotela je, da živim z njo, čeprav sem vedno imela boljši odnos z očetom.
Living with Mum had a bad influence on me.
Življenje z mamo je slabo vplivalo na mene.
She couldn't handle me at all, and I took it she was indecisive and I could allow myself anything.
Sploh pa me ni obvladala in to sem razumela, kot da je neodločna in da si lahko privoščim vse.
She set some limits, but then failed to observe them.
Postavila je neke meje in se jih potem ni držala.
To discipline me she took away the things I liked, but it didn't help.
Da bi me disciplinirala, mi je potem jemala stvari, ki sem jih imela rada, pa ni pomagalo.
Sabina thus started spending more and more time in the street.
Sabina je tako vedno pogosteje zahajala na cesto, kjer je tudi preživljala vedno več časa.
She soon got into drugs.
Tam je kmalu zapadla v droge.
It all started with the occasional smoking of grass at weekends, but when she went to rave parties, she tried other drugs, most often ecstasy, but also cocaine and heroin.
Vse skupaj se je začelo z občasnim kajenjem trave ob koncih tedna, ko pa je hodila na partije (rejverske zabave), je poskusila tudi droge, največkrat ekstazi, pa tudi kokain in heroin.
She finished primary school quite successfully.
Osnovno šolo je končala razmeroma uspešno.
Problems started at secondary school, in the very first year:
Težave so se pojavile v srednji šoli, že kar v prvem letniku:
“I totally lacked willpower or discipline to study.
»Imela sem totalno pomanjkanje volje in discipline za učenje.
I also had learning problems, I think because of the drugs.
Učne sposobnosti so se mi zmanjšale, mislim, da ravno zaradi drog.
All this was adding to my self-destructiveness and I lacked willpower to live.
To vse skupaj je samo še povečalo samodestruktuvnost in občutila sem pomanjkanje volje do življenja.
I was running away from life, and I think I even considered suicide.
Bežala sem pred življenjem in mislim, da sem celo mislila na samomor.
I had no selfconfidence, I wasn't successful at anything... the thought was running through my subconscious that in the end I could always kill myself.
Nobene samozavesti nisem imela, nikjer mi ni uspelo… v podzavesti sem imela, da na koncu se lahko še vedno ubijem.
I even tried suicide a few times, I swallowed pills and doped myself with horse, but I failed.
Nekajkrat sem celo poskusila narediti samomor, najedla sem se tablet in našibala s heroinom, pa mi ni uspelo.
She maintained her addiction with her grant; sometimes she also stole from her parents:
Svojo zasvojenost je vzdrževala s štipendijo in včasih še kaj ukradla staršem:
“In my gang somebody always had money, and if I didn't have any, others paid.
»Sicer pa je v moji družbi vedno nekdo imel denar in tudi če ga nisem imela, je kdo pač častil.
At the economics school I met an addict and totally bullied her, since I had no contacts to get heroin.
Na ekonomski sem spoznala odvisnico in ji totalno zagušila, saj sama nism mela vez za heroin.
When I was sniffing with a friend for the first time, he arranged the stuff.
Prvič, ko sem s frendom snifala (uživanje skozi nos), mi je on zrihtal.
But I wanted to shoot up (inject heroin), and that girl got it for me.
Hotela pa sem furat (intravenozno uživanje) in ona mi je zrihtala.
Shooting up totally fucked me up, I was throwing up and felt weak.”
Furanje me je totalno zjebalo, vse sem zbruhala in slaba sem se počutla.
“Mum was working all the time, I could always sneak away so she wouldn't see me.
»Mama je cele dneve delala, vedno sem se lahko izmuznila, da me ni videla.
It went on like this for a while, say until the fourth year.
Nekaj časa je to trajalo, do četrtega letnika recimo.
Then I started sniffing in the toilets with a classmate and taking pills and it all went wild.
Takrat pa sva s sošolcem začela snifati na stranišču in jesti tablete in vse skupaj je postalo divje.
I was totally out there, if I had the stuff, I slept during classes, if I didn't, I was totally upset.”
Bila sem čisto adijo, če sem imela robo, sem med poukom spala, če pa ne, pa sem bila čisto iz sebe.
“The teachers weren't taking me seriously, and then I quit the therapy and went back on heroin.
»Profesorji me sploh niso več resno jemali, zdravljenje sem potem prekinila in spet padla v heroin.
At home, too, things were getting worse.
Doma je bilo tudi vedno hujše.
So I didn't finish school, and I was still thinking of suicide.”
Zato tudi šole nisem končala, še vedno pa sem mislila na samomor.
Once I couldn't find horse anywhere.
To je bilo tako, da nikjer ni bilo horsa (heroina).
I dug out some old junkie (heroin addict) and he got it for me.
Našla sem nekega starega džankija (odvisnika od heroina) in ta mi je zrihtal.
I think he just mixed something up, it all happened at his place.
Po mojem je kar nekaj namešal, pa še pri njem doma se je vse skupaj zgodilo.
I was in a coma from Friday to Sunday - in his flat.
V komi sem bila od petka do nedelje, in to v njegovem stanovanju.
I woke up on Sunday completely paralysed, and the guy never even called an ambulance.
Zbudila sem se v nedeljo povsem paralizirana in tip ni niti rešilca poklical.
My mum was calling me at that time, but nobody answered the phone.
Mama je v tem času sicer klicala, pa ni nihče dvignil.
I went into total panic, I couldn't speak (due to vocal chord paresis) or move.
Dajala me je totalna panika, nisem mogla niti govoriti (zaradi pareze glasilk) niti se premikati.
The ambulance came and took me to hospital.
Tam sem ostala mesec dni, bolj kot rastlina.
I stayed there for a month, mostly feeling like a vegetable.
Sčasoma sem začela spet hoditi in govoriti.
For a while her mother had suspected that something was going on with Sabina:
Mama je že nekaj časa sumila, da se s Sabino nekaj dogaja:
“Mum had this experience with my brother, and she immediately knew what was going on.
»Mama je imela izkušnjo z bratom in je takoj vedela, kaj se dogaja.
My brother was always talking me out of drugs.
Brat me je vedno odvračal od tega.
You crazy, he was saying, don't you see what kind of life this is?
Kaj si nora, mi je govoril, kaj ne vidiš, kaki lajf je to?
When I was cleaning up, he was totally there for me, explained everything, what I can eat and what not, what to drink, what not… On the net I found a lot of stuff about my condition, I knew a lot of things already, even before the professional services sent me the materials.”
Ko sem se pucala (telesno čistila), mi je stal totalno ob stani, vse mi je razložil, kaj smem jest, kaj ne, kaj naj pijem, kaj ne… Na netu sem našla veliko diagnoz za svoje stanje, veliko stvari sem vedela, še preden so mi jih poslale domov strokovne službe.
I said I wouldn't go, but it was clear to me I was in a dead end.
Rekla sem, da ne bom šla, postalo pa mi je jasno, da tako ne gre več naprej.
I was cleaning up alone for two weeks, without therapy and without reducing the dose.
Sama sem se dva tedna potem čistila, brez zdravil in vseh zniževanj doze.
I had a total crisis, but succeeded nevertheless.
Totalno krizo sem imela, vseeno pa mi je uspelo.
That was 10 months ago, and I haven't taken anything since.
Od tega je že 10 mesecev in v tem času nisem poskusla ničesar.
I got total will to live and thank God something like this happened… that I was robbed.”
Dobila sem totalni zagon do življenja in hvala bogu, da se je nekaj takega zgodilo... to da so me okradli.
“I'm still full of energy, I' d like to be on my own as soon as possible and become independent of my mother.
Svojo izkušnjo z drogami Sabina dojema kot pomembno v življenju predvsem z vidika doseganja zrelosti, svojo prihodnost pa vidi izjemno pozitivno:
I'd like to move away, I have to finish school and find a job.
»Zdaj imam še veliko zagona, rada bi se čim prej osamosvojila in bila neodvisna od mame.
“In general, it's not particularly hard for young Slovenians in Italy.”
»Mladim Slovencem v Italiji po večini ni posebej težko.
“Ahm… who I am?
»Hmm.. kdo sem?
Well, Barbara is… Barbara is very open, although she lives in an environment where she has to hold things up, I'm a Slovenian living abroad, in Italy, we're a minority.
No, Barbara je… Baraba ima zelo odprt značaj, čeprav živi v okolju, kjer se mora zadrževati glede na to, da sem zamejka, in glede na to, da živim v Italiji in da smo manjšina.
There are certain parts of Trieste where you can't speak Slovenian in the streets just like that.
So predeli Trsta, kjer ne moreš kar tako po ulicah govoriti slovensko.
But I do it anyway.
Jaz to vseeno delam.
Because I'm a true Slovenian, very attached to my personal history and to my roots.
Ker pač sem trda Slovenka, ker sem tudi zelo navezana na svojo osebno zgodovino in korenine.
This is passed on from generation to generation, and I'm passing it on to my chil
Ta prehaja iz roda v rod in jaz to zagotavljam svojim otrokom.
Barbara has lived all her life in Gročana, a small Slovenian village on the Italian side of the border.
Barbara živi že vse svoje življenje na Gročani, majhni slovenski vasici na drugi strani meje z Italijo.
She lives in her parents' house and claims she has been happily married for 11 years to a boy she met on a school bus.
Živi v hiši svojih staršev in pravi, da je že 11 let srečno poročena s fantom, ki ga je spoznala na šolskem avtobusu.
They have two daughters, aged 11 and 8.
Skupaj imata dve hčerki, stari 11 in 8 let.
Barbara is a housewife, which means she stays at home, taking care of the household and her family; her husband Diego, who works in a warehouse, gets a small bonus in addition to his salary:
Barbara ima status gospodinje, kar pomeni, da ostaja doma in skrbi za gospodinjstvo in družino, mož Diego, ki dela kot skladiščnik, pa dobi pri plači majhen dodatek:
“In the morning I get up, walk my kids to the school bus, return home, clear up, iron, make lunch, my husband comes home at one, at three he goes back to work, then the girls come and it's chaos again… we do the homework together and learn… I can say I'm not only a housewife, but a bit of everything - electrician, teacher - given that I have to respond to the situation at home.”
»Zjutraj vstanem, pospremim otroke na šolski avtobus, pridem domov, pospravim, speglam, skuham kosilo, ob enih je mož doma, ob treh gre nazaj, potem sta punčki doma in je spet kaos… skupaj delamo domačo nalogo in se učimo… Lahko rečem, da nisem samo gospodinja, ampak malo vsega, električarka, učiteljica, glede na to, da se moram prilagoditi situaciji doma.
Everybody was of course given the option of sending their children to an Italian school.
Vsem pa je seveda ponujena tudi možnost, da bi otroke vpisali v italijansko šolo.
As a thing of interest Barbara stresses that all of them, herself, her children and her husband, have Slovenian citizenship.
Kot zelo pomembno Barbara poudarja, da imajo vsi, ona, njeni otroci in tudi njen mož, slovensko državljanstvo.
She describes life on the Italian side of the border as quite usual, although a bit harder and tenser:
Življenje na italijanski strani meje je opisala kot povsem običajno, čeprav nekoliko težje in bolj napeto:
“Given that we live in a Slovenian village, I believe our life is the same as for Slovenians in Slovenia.
»Glede na to, da mi živimo v slovenski vasi, mislim, da je naše življenje enako, kot ga imajo Slovenci v Sloveniji.
When we meet Slovenians from Slovenia, I notice we are closer to them than to Italians in Italy.”
Tudi ko srečamo Slovence iz Slovenije, opažam, da smo jim bolj blizu kot Italijanom v Italiji.
Young people don't feel that.
Mladi tega ne čutijo.
Who are sciavi?
Kdo pa so ščavi?
What does it mean?
Kaj to pomeni?
“Sciavi?
Ščavi?
Well... slaves.
No… sužnji.
This is why they still often desecrate the signposts for Slovenia.
In zato nam tudi velikokrat porišejo table, kjer je napisan znak za vas.
Mostly young Italian Fascists… And maybe also just for fun, but we (Slovenians) once again become a target.”
To delajo po večini mladi italijanski fašisti… Mogoče tudi samo za zabavo, vseeno pa postanemo (Slovenci) spet tarča.
“Last year there was a situation when we again become the target of Italian slander and insults.
Lani smo doživeli tako situacijo, da smo postali tarča italijanskih zasmehovanj in žalitev.
A theatre group from Trieste staged a play entitled I sempi qualche volta indovina (Even the simple ones sometimes get it right).
Ena gledališka skupina iz Trsta je uprizorila eno igro z naslovom I sempi qualche volta indovina (tudi šempjasti včasih ugenanejo).
The story is about Gročana.
Ta zgodba govori o Gročani.
On the fliers they were giving out instead of an invitation there was a picture of the signpost with a welcome greeting to our village.
Na letakih, ki so jih razdeljevali kot vabilo, je bila slika naše table, ki podaja vsem dobrodošlico v vas.
The story was about stupid peasants, because a maledizione... a curse was on them, and so they were thick-headed.
V tej zgodbi so živeli neumni kmetje, ker je padla na njih maledizione… prekletstvo, in so zato bili zabiti.
There were also counts from Gročana… they described our peasant life very well, and in the end the thing was resolved by a peasant marrying a smarter lady, which lifted the curse.
Nastopali so tudi grofi iz Gročane… zelo dobro so opisali naše kmečko življenje in na koncu se stvar reši tako, da se en kmet poroči z eno bolj pametno gospo in prekletstvo je padlo.
On the fliers it said that the curse had been affl icting Gročana for 200 years, and everybody was still stupid there.
Na letakih je pisalo, da to prekletstvo traja v Gročani že 200 let in tam so še vedno vsi zabiti.
We were offended at the story and the director, a woman from Trieste… well, it was more than clear that she'd done her homework and researched our life.
Mi smo se nad to zgodbo užalili in režiserka, ki je iz Trsta, … no, jasno je bilo, da se je ta zelo dobro pozanimala, kako mi živimo.
She visited Gročana and from the background observed how our people behaved.
Prihajala je v Gročano in iz ozadja je spremljala ljudi in jih gledala, kako se obnašajo.
We kept quiet, but sent letters to the public and to our Slovenian paper Primorski dnevnik and to the Italian daily Il Piccolo.
Mi smo sicer molčali in smo pisali pisma v javnost oziroma na naš slovenski Primorski dnevnik in Tržaški dnevnik Il Piccolo.
Whoever read it was asking us why we took notice of such trivial things, they said we didn't understand a little fun.
Vsi, ki so to prebrali, so nam potem odgovarjali, da zakaj se primemo za take malenkosti, da ne razumemo škerca… heca.
But if the lady targeted their village instead of Gročana and showed their life in such a way, I bet they'd be angry too.
Če bi ta gospa vzela njihov kraj in ne Gročano za prikaz takega življenja, stavim, da bi se nad tem tudi kdo drug jezil.
But the thing didn't end at that.
Situacija se ni tu končala.
We took them to court, because I think… we're still wondering why it was Gročana that became the target of Italian insults.”
Obtožili smo jih na sodišču, ker mislim,… se sprašujemo še danes, zakaj je ravno Gročana postala tarča italijanskih žalitev.
And why was that?
Zakaj je postala?
Barbara says she in fact prefers to be constructive rather than combative, and this is why she invests her energy in preserving Slovenian culture in Italy.
Barbara pravi, da sicer pa raje deluje konstruktivno kot pa ofenzivno in zato svojo energijo usmerja v ohranjanje slovenske kulture v zamejstvu.
Not long ago she wrote the piano accompaniment for an old Slovenian poem from Gročana written by the late Valentin Racman.
Pred kratkim je na klavir uglasbila staro slovensko pesem iz Gročane, ki jo je napisal umrli Valentin Racman.
Barbara says that this is the way to relate the past to the present, and try to prevent cultural fragments from sinking into oblivion.
Barbara pravi, da tako povezuje zgodovino s sedanjostjo, in se trudi preprečiti, da ti delčki kulture ne bi šli v pozabo.
She also adds that the song is a great success in the village, and that all the children from Gročana are singing it.
Dodaja še, da je pesem velika uspešnica v vasi in jo pojejo vsi otroci v Gročani.
What does it mean for you to be a Slovenian?
»Kaj ti pomeni biti Slovenka?
”Everything… I'm very proud of it, and this is why I strive for everything so much.
Vse… zelo sem ponosna na to, zato se za vse skupaj tudi borim.
It's hard, but if you persist and have clear notions about things, you can do it.
To je sicer težko, a če vztrajaš in imaš jasne pojme, gre.
But the problem is that not all Slovenians in Italy feel like this.
Problem je v tem, da vsi mladi v zamejstvu tega nimajo.
They don't see the whole picture.
Sploh nimajo celotne podobe.
Young people here across the border mostly don't care, they don't have this awareness.
Mladim v zamejstvu je po večini vseeno, sploh se ne zavedajo.
To be a Slovenian abroad means maintaining, respecting and nurturing culture and tradition… this is important for everybody, not just the young.”
Biti Slovenec v zamejstvu pomeni ohranjati in spoštovati in nadaljevati kulturo in tradicije… to je pomembno za vse, ne le za mlade, tudi za starejše.
“… we play at village festivals.
Z možem Diegom sta ustanovila tudi slovenski narodno-zabavni ansambel:
It wasn't really meant like… It was meant for fun and relaxation.
Vse skupaj pa sploh ni bilo mišljeno kot… Bilo je mišljeno kot skupna zabava in sprostitev.
It was called Sonce (Sun).
Imenoval se je Sonce.
Unfortunately our common path ended in 2007 when the guitarist left us; he was from Slovenia and died in a car accident.
Žal pa se je naša pot zaključila 2007 z odhodom kitarista, ki je bil iz Slovenije in je umrl v prometni nesreči.
At the beginning I took it very badly, the boy was only 22 years old, and it felt wrong to me to continue singing.
Na začetku sem jaz stvar zelo slabo sprejela, ker je bil fant star 22 let in ni se mi zdelo prav, da nadaljujem s petjem.