Failing Up With Jar Jar Binks Failing Up With Jar Jar Binks was a comic appearing in " Star Wars Tales 20 " . Plot summary . The story begins with Jar Jar Binks singing another of his songs . His aides whisper to each other and wonder whether all Gungans are as bad as him . The two aides decide it is time for Jar Jar to actually do some Senatorial work and ask him whether he has decided which way he ' ll vote for the New Tax Bill . But Jar Jar " no like to think about Paxes . " Jar Jar demands that his aides tell him how to vote . One suggests that more revenue would be necessary to protect trade routes from space pirates . Jar Jar decides to vote " yes " as " Soak Da Rich " is his motto . Unfortunately the other aide begins to give reasons why in fact he should vote " no . " Talk of votes and " Mamendmenps " confuses Jar Jar until his head hurts . He eventually decides to vote " no " as " Lead my rips , NO MOO PAXES ! " Later Jar Jar meets with some other Senators to discuss going to war with rebels . Jar Jar is " for " going to war as " Jar Jar been Great warrior , Eesa fact ! " The Senators tell Jar Jar a Rebel Emissary has arrived to negotiate a truce . Jar Jar immediately dives behind a desk , screaming in terror that a " Cold - Blooded Mercenary is in da bilbing . " Apparently , despite his huge ears , Jar Jar misunderstands words extremely easily . When the Emissary walks in , Jar Jar ' s eyes pop out of their sockets . The Emissary is conversing with another senator when Jar Jar ' s lust overcomes him and he licks the Emissary , exclaiming that the " Pretty mercenary tastee as gooda she lookee ! " The Emissary walks out of the negotiations angrily , having been offended by Jar Jar ' s antics . As far as she is concerned that incident means war . Later Jar Jar attends a debate with a rival on the campaign trail . The rival finds it completely absurd that Jar Jar was ever elected and brings up that Jar Jar was once even banished in disgrace . The rival also dismisses Jar Jar ' s war heroism as based entirely on two Jedi Knights who only let him hang around for comic relief . Jar Jar counters this by saying " Comedy relief good for morale , meesa regular . " The opposition to Jar Jar also refers to the recent incident that resulted in war . The rival then begins referring to Jar Jar as " blithering " , calling him a " dunderhead . " That is when Jar Jar objects : " Meesa not dunderhead ! Meesa am childlike ! That why all of Universe adore Jar Jar … while " you " sir , am no " Jar Jar Binks ! " The opposition is forced to admit that it is true as the crowd cheers . And so Jar Jar is re - elected as a Naboo Senator . As he is celebrating with his senatorial friends , a mysterious stranger suggests that Jar Jar run for higher office , considering he is so popular . Jar Jar is instantly swayed to the idea , as the stranger tells him he ' ll have even more time to play and all the Naboo Bug Juice he can drink . Jar Jar immediately starts jumping around yelling " Jar Jar for preseedenty ! " The stranger takes Jar Jar into his private chambers , where a Hologram of Darth Sidious awaits to talk to him . Jar Jar claims that he " recognizes a " Shake Down " " when he sees one . Jar Jar tells Sidious that if they ' re working together , Sidious will be working for him ! Jar Jar demands that both of them bow before " the " future ruler " of the " entire universe ! " " They both kneel . . . " Yes Master , " Sidious replies .