Astrid ( Skyrim ) Astrid is the leader of the Dark Brotherhood in Skyrim and wife of another Dark Brotherhood member , Arnbjorn . She resides in the Dark Brotherhood Sanctuary , near Falkreath , and holds the responsibility of finding new recruits in the Night Mother ' s absence . She serves as the primary antagonist of the Dark Brotherhood quest - line . Background . When asked about herself after the player joins the Dark Brotherhood , Astrid says that she had an uncle who made " unwanted advances " towards her , so she killed him . It " felt good , really good , " so she killed another , unspecified person , and it " felt even better . " After an unknown amount of time , she joined the Dark Brotherhood and later married another Brotherhood member , Arnbjorn . Personality . Astrid decrees her unbeatable dictatorship , comparable and " stronger " than The Five Tenets . She tires of the laws and restrictions that limit the Brotherhood , deciding that a sort of family - like unity benefits the members of the Brotherhood better than structure . After the attack on the Falkreath Sanctuary by the Penitus Oculatus , Astrid realizes her mistake in thinking she was the sole authority of the Brotherhood by going against the Five Tenets , as " they have guided the Brotherhood for centuries . I was a fool to oppose them , " and as well for leading to the deaths of most of the Brotherhood , and before her death pleads forgiveness for her transgressions against the Night Mother and the Dragonborn . Interactions . With Friends Like These . . . . Successfully killing Grelod the Kind for Aventus Aretino causes Astrid to kidnap the Dragonborn once the " Mysterious Note " is received . She brings them to an abandoned shack and asks them to kill one of three hostages . Regardless of whom the Dragonborn kills , Astrid gives them directions to the Sanctuary , and invites them to join her " family . " Should the Dragonborn choose to kill Astrid instead during this encounter , Commander Maro learns of the deed and tasks the Dragonborn with eradicating the remaining members of the Dark Brotherhood . Whispers In The Dark . Astrid asks the Dragonborn to spy on Cicero , as she suspects that he is plotting with another member of the sanctuary to destroy the brotherhood . The Dragonborn obeys , hearing the Night Mother speak and becoming her Listener . Threatened by the Night Mother ' s choice , Astrid reclaims her authority by sending the Dragonborn on off - handed contracts until she investigates the contract the Night Mother told to the Listener . Death Incarnate . Upon the attack on the Dark Brotherhood ' s sanctuary , many of the Assassins of the Dark Brotherhood fell , including Astrid . She begs the Dragonborn to kill her by performing The Black Sacrament , dubbing the Dragonborn her replacement as leader of the brotherhood and admitting she was wrong for defying the Night Mother . She also explains that she negotiated with the head of the Penitus Oculatus , Commander Maro , into revealing the identity of the Dragonborn in exchange for political immunity . Maro went back on his word , attacking the Sanctuary . She asks to be killed with her Blade of Woe , but she can be killed with any weapon . After Astrid ' s death , the Dragonborn and the remaining assassins move to the Dawnstar Sanctuary , where Cicero fled and can still be found if he was spared . Conversations . Quest - related dialogue . With Friends Like These . . . . When the Dragonborn sleeps in a bed after completing the quest " Innocence Lost , " he or she awakens in an abandoned shack , and the following dialogue appears after waking from their slumber . If the Dragonborn exits dialogue anytime during this conversation , Astrid will say , " " I ' ll cut right to it . You murdered the old woman in this orphanage . You owe the Dark Brotherhood a kill . I ' ve come to collect . One of these poor sods has a contract out on their life . Which one is it ? Any idea ? Make your choice . Make your kill . And you get to walk away . " " Talking to Astrid before the Dragonborn kills any one of the hostages will result in Astrid saying , " " The anticipation is killing me . Can you figure out who has the contract ? Which one will you choose ? " " After completing this dialogue , the quest " With Friends Like These . . . " begins .