Two Days and Two Nights ( episode ) The crew takes shore leave on the famous pleasure planet of Risa . For many , it is anything but a vacation . Summary . Teaser . After two aborted attempts , finally arrives at the pleasure planet of Risa . Since they can only stay for two days , the crew draws lots to see who can take shore leave and who must stay on board to keep the ship running . Captain Archer , Ensign s Hoshi Sato and Travis Mayweather , Commander , and Lieutenant Malcolm Reed get to be among the lucky few who get to go down . Captain Archer feels bad going down while half the crew has to stay on board , but T ' Pol reassures him that he need not worry because everyone drew lots and it was a fair draw . He still feels uneasy , believing the crew should come first , but she insists that he needs a vacation . Act One . On their way down to the planet in a shuttlecraft , they discuss their plans . Mayweather plans to spend his shore leave rock climbing at a place called Galartha , where the cliff - face changes pitch while one climbs it ; Reed and Tucker plan on broadening their " cultural horizons " , as they state somewhat mischievously , making Sato wonder if that is all they think about . Sato herself plans on doing something constructive with her time , such as learning new language s without relying on her universal translator so much . Reed and Tucker poke fun at her , teasing her that she only has two days , which she probably shouldn ' t be spending by just merely talking to people . Captain Archer does not seem nearly as excited and adventurous about his plans for shore leave , stating that he got a little villa overlooking the ocean and plans on relaxing there with Porthos and reading . Back on the ship , Doctor Phlox , who also received shore leave , plans on spending his time not by going down to the planet but by hibernating , telling T ' Pol and Crewman Cutler to wake him up only if there is a medical emergency . Down on the planet , Tucker and Reed , who plan to spend their shore leave seeking female companionship , go to a bar where they meet plenty of what they are looking for . Archer goes to his villa overlooking the ocean to find that T ' Pol left him a copy of " The Teachings of Surak " to read . While he spends some quiet time alone relaxing on his patio , he meets a beautiful alien woman named Keyla who appears somewhat reserved and reluctant . She turns down his invitation to go for dinner but suggests meeting up the next day . Act Two . In the meantime , Sato , who has been planning to spend her shore leave learning new languages , strikes up a conversation with an elderly Risan couple , who are surprised that she speaks their language so well and that she bothered to learn it in the first place , since so few people do . After the couple leaves , an alien male approaches Sato . He overheard her conversation with the Risan couple and is fascinated by her ability to learn new languages so rapidly . He tells her the name of his home planet ( which is quite long ) . When Sato asks him to repeat it more slowly , he informs her that to do so would change the meaning of what is said . Intrigued , Sato continues to talk with him , trying to learn his language . He invites her to dinner and she agrees . Tucker and Reed , meanwhile , have the time of their life surrounded by beautiful women in the nightclub they visited . They meet two particularly attractive and interested women who suggest a stroll down to the subterranean gardens . Reed and Tucker eagerly accept . The women lure them to a secluded place that does not resemble gardens at all , suddenly asking them how much starship captains get paid on their world and about the kind of valuables they have . Tucker and Reed quickly realize that there has obviously been a misunderstanding here , but before they can explain , they find out that the alien women are actually male thieves in disguise , who , disgusted to find that Tucker and Reed are carrying nothing of value , knock them out with their weapon s and steal their clothes so they can sell them . Act Three . Back on the ship , T ' Pol receives a message from Mayweather , asking her to send down a shuttle for him to come up ; he had a little rock - climbing accident , and is currently being treated in the central hospital . He complains that not only does the rock face change , but that it also has handholds that change - causing him to fall . T ' Pol asks him why he didn ' t let them treat him down there on the planet , but Mayweather explains that he is not too fond of alien hospitals and wanted his own doctor to take a look at him . However , he soon finds out that Phlox is actually not available as he is in hibernation . Mayweather is not too happy about this , especially since he has been experiencing difficulty breathing . To be sure , they take him to sickbay for observation . Down on the planet , Tucker and Reed finally regain consciousness . Their hands are tied and the aliens have stripped them down to their underwear . They realize that they have been down there all night and that shore leave is almost half over . They scream asking for help , but no one can hear them as the aliens sealed the door when leaving them down there . While Tucker is angry , stating that he doesn ' t plan on spending his short time on the planet tied down in some basement , Reed notes that the Vulcan database never mentioned anything about crime on Risa . Tucker states that actually it contained some warning about such things , and before they know it , they start arguing with and blaming each other for their situation . On the ship , Mayweather ' s health is deteriorating further and he is experiencing more difficulty breathing . It appears as if the pain medication he was given on Risa has caused an allergic reaction . Crewman Cutler recommends they wake up Phlox to treat Mayweather . Act Four . However , the doctor isn ' t fully awake and it takes him a while to both remember what he ' s supposed to be doing and how to treat Mayweather . Despite his almost delirious state , he finally manages to treat him , confirming that he has had an allergic reaction . He promptly passes out face down on a biobed the moment he has finished treating Mayweather . On Risa , Sato continues spending time with her new alien friend , who invites her to a steampool that he has been planning on visiting and she agrees to join him . They get along quite well , and Sato ends up spending the night with him . While Sato is enjoying the time with her new companion , and Tucker and Reed try to find a way out of their embarrassing situation , a somewhat lonely Archer finally receives a visit from Keyla , who is suddenly very talkative and asks him many strange questions . She tells him that she had a family that was killed by the Suliban . Archer feels bad , remembering how he aided a few Suliban prisoners escape once . They open a bottle of Risan wine , but Keyla doesn ' t appear to be in the best mood . Upon asking her if something was the matter , Keyla begins talking about the Suliban again , asking Archer if he has ever seen any of them and what he knows about them ; she insists on knowing where they come from and where they live . Archer apologizes for not being able to tell her more , however , Keyla doesn ' t stop prying , acting more agitated , yelling at Archer to tell her more about where they live . This is when Archer realizes that something is not right and that there is more going on here than what meets the eye . When she leaves his place to get a sweater for their walk along the beach , Archer transmits a bioscan of Keyla to the ship . It turns out that she is a Tandaran who has undergone plastic surgery to disguise herself . Once Archer discovers her true identity and confronts her , she knocks him out and disappears . While Reed and Tucker manage to cut through the ropes to free themselves , leaving the cellar and walking back to the bar and to their rooms in their underwear , Sato , who has spent the night with the man she just met , is getting ready , albeit reluctantly , to go back to the ship . She explains that she wished she could spend all day lying in bed with him , but that she has to go . Captain Archer also finally awakens with a headache , realizing that he was out all night after Keyla knocked him unconscious . On the shuttle flight back to the ship , everyone is rather quiet and not nearly as eager and talkative as they were on their way down two days ago . An embarrassed Tucker and Reed are sitting there in their underwear and robes , trying not to smell or let anyone know what really happened to them down there , while Archer smiles , stating that he in fact got plenty of rest and went out like a light . Sato seems to be the only one with a smirk on her face , even though she also doesn ' t reveal what really happened , merely stating that she in fact learned several new conjugations . Thinking that Archer had a dull time just reading , Tucker suggests that next time they have shore leave , instead of just sitting around and reading books , he should try and get out , look for a little excitement and meet new people . Archer nods and smiles . Memorable quotes . " " Captain , you need a vacation . " " " " I ' ll bring you a souvenir . " " " " Malcolm and I plan to , uh . . . " broaden " our cultural horizons . " " " " Is that all you two think about ? " " " " Well , how we choose to relax is our own business . " " " " Before I left Earth , I learned 38 languages and now all I do is push a button and the computer does all the work . " " " " Isn ' t that what it ' s for ? " " " " Now she ' s interesting . " " " " I don ' t think ' she ' is the right pronoun . " " " " I don ' t care what it tastes like ! " " " " Most of what I have learned about them has come from rumors and hearsay . But you have seen them face to face . I want you to tell me what you know . Where are their helixes ? Where do they live ? ! " " " " I ' m gonna check out now . I can ' t have you interfering . " " " " You were willing to follow two aliens into a basement ! " " < br > " Gorgeous " aliens ! Remember , they were " gorgeous " ! " < br > " " " They were " male " ! " " < br > " " Not at first ! " " " Whatever ' s in that bottle you broke got all over me . It stinks to high heaven . " " " " It ' s not like I had a choice . We needed something to cut through those ropes . " " " " Have you ever been to an alien hospital ? " " " " Yes . In San Francisco . " " " " What about you , Hoshi ? Do anything constructive ? " " " " As a matter of fact , I learned several new conjugations . " " Links and references . References . 1852 ; 2134 ; 2152 ; accent ; anaphylactic shock ; anniversary ; bandage ; ; benzethonium chloride ; bioscan ; bistro ; boat ; breakfast ; ; captain ; captain ' s personal log ; ; CMO ; colonel ; communications officer ; day ; dilithium ; dinner ; DNA ; dog ; dream ; Earth ; English ; ; February ; Festival of the Moon ; French language ; Galartha ; Grat ; Hawaiian shirt ; helix ; helm ; helmsman ; hibernation ; " horga ' hn " ; hospital ; hotel ; Human ; hypospray ; juice ; Kaitlen ; kiss ; kiwi ; Klingon ; launch bay ; light year ; lobby ; log entry ; mating ritual ; mess hall ; month ; moon ; nightclub ; North American Water Polo Regionals ; orbit ; painkiller ; painting ; " preemari " ; pronoun ; Ravis ' language ; Regulan bloodworm ; Regulus ; restaurant ; Risa ; Risian ; Risan language ; Risan mai - tai ; Risan sea turtle ; Risan wine ; rock climbing ; San Francisco ; school ; science officer ; seafood ; ShiKahr ; shore leave ; shuttlepod ; " " ; " Shuttlepod 2 " ; Skon ; spitting ; starship ; steampool ; strawberry ; Suliban ; Suliban Cabal ; Surak ; Suraya Bay ; surgeon ; Tandaran ; teacher ; " Teachings of Surak , The " ; telescope ; telescope ; toast ; turbolift ; turtle ; universal translator ; Vega Reticuli ; Vega Reticuli couple ; Vulcan ; Vulcan database ; waiter ; waitress ; warp ; water polo ; wedding ; wine Unreferenced material . Agasorian Nebula ; Freebus