Somewhere up in heaven, a very loved father is having a laugh at his own clever obituary. William Ziegler, 69, died on Friday, July 29 and his four children found the best way to remember their late father ― with a healthy dose of humor. 
 
 Ziegler’s four children say they couldn’t think of a more fitting sendoff for their dad than to write a grand-slam obituary, honoring his sense of humor. Ziegler himself was a fan of hilarious obits and internet humor, often sharing them with his family. 
 
 William Ziegler escaped this mortal realm on Friday, July 29, 2016 at the age of 69... Unlike previous times, this is not a ploy to avoid creditors or old girlfriends. He assures us that he is gone. He will be greatly missed. 
 
 “He would have loved this,” Ziegler’s daughter, Sharah Currier, told The Times-Picayune. “He probably would have forwarded this obituary to us.” 
 
 Published today in the New Orleans paper, the obit says Ziegler “escaped this mortal realm” ... “to avoid having to make a decision in the pending presidential election.” 
 
 They offered a nod to the late Navy veteran’s 25 years of service as a fireman, saying he retired only when “he suddenly realized that running away from burning buildings made more sense than running toward them.” 
 
 Ziegler’s children say they spent several days crafting the obituary. A post featuring the obit on the Times-Picayune’s Facebook page has already gone viral with nearly 8,000 likes and over 2,000 shares to date. 
 
 Other highlights of the obit include shoutouts to Ziegler’s love for “potted meats,” his “alcoholic dog” Judge, and the “morons and mental patients” he used to work with. 
 
 They also ask that instead of holding a service, well-wishers should simply write a note of farewell on a can of Schaefer Light beer and drink it in his honor. 
 
 Rest in peace, William. ||||| Hillary or Trump? Neither, please. 
 
 Late New Orleans firefighter William Ziegler happily avoided both, according to his kids. 
 
 “William Ziegler escaped this mortal realm on Friday, July 29, 2016 at the age of 69. We think he did it on purpose to avoid having to make a decision in the pending presidential election,” Ziegler’s children wrote in his obituary. 
 
 “He leaves behind four children, five grandchildren, and the potted meat industry, for which he was an unofficial spokesman until dietary restrictions forced him to eat real food.” 
 
 Ziegler joined the Navy at 17 — “he only stuck it out for one war” — then spent 25 years with the New Orleans Fire Department. 
 
 “Looking back, William stated that there was no better group of morons and mental patients than those he had the privilege of serving with (except Bob, he never liked you, Bob).” 
 
 Ziegler’s daughter, Sharah Currier, told the New Orleans Times-Picayune that there was no Bob in her dad’s life that she knew of. 
 
 The retired firefighter, who moved to Houston after Hurricane Katrina, collected old obituaries and sent them to his children, Currier said, so they thought he deserved a humorous one of his own. 
 
 “Following his wishes, there will not be a service, but well-wishers are encouraged to write a note of farewell on a Schaefer Light beer can and drink it in his honor. He was never one for sentiment or religiosity, but he wanted you to know that if he owes you a beer, and if you can find him in Heaven, he will gladly allow you to buy him another,” the obituary reads. 
 
 “He can likely be found forwarding tasteless internet jokes (check your spam folder, but don't open these at work). Expect to find an alcoholic dog named Judge passed out at his feet. Unlike previous times, this is not a ploy to avoid creditors or old girlfriends. He assures us that he is gone. He will be greatly missed.” ||||| I never met William Ziegler, who died July 29 at the age of 69. But after reading the obituary his children wrote, I regret not knowing him. 
 
 The kids suspect he died "on purpose to avoid having to make a decision in the pending presidential election." And they assure us that, "unlike previous times, this is not a ploy to avoid creditors or old girlfriends." 
 
 The full obit, probably one of the best you will ever read, is posted below. 
 
 "It was a combined effort," said Sharah Currier, one of Mr. Ziegler's four children. "My brothers, my sister and myself batted it around for a couple weeks before we posted it." 
 
 When he was 17, Mr. Ziegler, a New Orleans native, forged his father's signature to join the Navy. He served one tour in Vietnam. 
 
 "He only stuck it out for one war," reads the obituary. "Before his discharge, however, the government exchanged numerous ribbons and medals for various honorable acts." 
 
 Mr. Ziegler came home to New Orleans in 1971 and became a firefighter for the next 25 years. 
 
 "Looking back," says the obituary, "William stated that there was no better group of morons and mental patients than those he had the privilege of serving with (except Bob, he never liked you, Bob)." 
 
 Who was Bob? 
 
 "There was no Bob. At least I hope not," Currier said. "That was a running joke with my dad." 
 
 After Katrina, Mr. Ziegler moved to the Houston area, where Currier and also his son Shayne live. 
 
 Mr. Ziegler had a hobby of collecting odd obituaries and forwarding them to his children. It was why they felt he deserved a humorous obituary. 
 
 The obituary quickly went viral on Facebook and was even noted by the Daily Mail website in the U.K. 
 
 "He would have loved this," Currier said. "He probably would have forwarded this obituary to us." 
 
 Read the full obituary: 
 
 William Ziegler escaped this mortal realm on Friday, July 29, 2016 at the age of 69. We think he did it on purpose to avoid having to make a decision in the pending presidential election. 
 
 He leaves behind four children, five grandchildren, and the potted meat industry, for which he was an unofficial spokesman until dietary restrictions forced him to eat real food. 
 
 William volunteered for service in the United States Navy at the ripe old age of 17 and immediately realized he didn't much enjoy being bossed around. He only stuck it out for one war. Before his discharge, however, the government exchanged numerous ribbons and medals for various honorable acts. 
 
 Upon his return to the City of New Orleans in 1971, thinking it best to keep an eye on him, government officials hired William as a fireman. After twenty-five years, he suddenly realized that running away from burning buildings made more sense than running toward them. He promptly retired. Looking back, William stated that there was no better group of morons and mental patients than those he had the privilege of serving with (except Bob, he never liked you, Bob). 
 
 Following his wishes, there will not be a service, but well-wishers are encouraged to write a note of farewell on a Schaefer Light beer can and drink it in his honor. He was never one for sentiment or religiosity, but he wanted you to know that if he owes you a beer, and if you can find him in Heaven, he will gladly allow you to buy him another. 
 
 He can likely be found forwarding tasteless internet jokes (check your spam folder, but don't open these at work). Expect to find an alcoholic dog named Judge passed out at his feet. Unlike previous times, this is not a ploy to avoid creditors or old girlfriends. He assures us that he is gone. He will be greatly missed.
– William Ziegler died July 29 at the age of 69 "to avoid having to make a decision in the pending presidential election," and "unlike previous times, this is not a ploy to avoid creditors or old girlfriends." At least according to an obituary published Friday in the New Orleans Times-Picayune. The Times-Picayune reports the obituary, quickly going viral, was the work of Ziegler's four children and calls it one of the all-time great obituaries. Ziegler served in Vietnam—the obituary notes he "only stuck it out for one war"—before working as a firefighter in New Orleans for 25 years. The obituary goes on to note Ziegler's fondness for his "alcoholic dog," the "morons and mental patients" he worked with, and "potted meats," the Huffington Post reports. According to the New York Daily News, there won't be a service, so Ziegler's children ask people to "write a note of farewell on a Schaefer Light beer can and drink it in his honor." Ziegler's daughter, Sharah Currier, tells the Times-Picayune that her dad would always pass along strange obituaries. "He would have loved this," she says. "He probably would have forwarded this obituary to us." Ziegler's obituary does end on a serious note: "He will be greatly missed."