1. "When it comes to hair, no one is more bitchy than conservative males." 
 
 2. "I don't like the crying." 
 
 3. "I'm not a schmuck. Even if the world goes to hell in a handbasket, I won't lose a penny." 
 
 4. "The Italians have a saying: 'Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.' And though they've never won a war, or mass produced a decent car, in this area, they are correct." 
 
 5. "Human empathy! It's as useless as the Winter Olympics." 
 
 6. "I do admire Wonka. He is a true capitalist. His factory has zero government regulations, slave labor and an indoor boat." 
 
 7. "The only kind of people I want counting my money are little short guys that wear yarmulkes every day." 
 
 8. "[Gay marriage is like] in golf. A lot of people—I don't want this to sound trivial, but a lot of people are switching to these really long putters, very unattractive. It's weird. You see these great players with these really long putters, because they can't sink three-footers anymore. And, I hate it. I am a traditionalist. I have so many fabulous friends who happen to be gay, but I am a traditionalist." 
 
 9. "I once claimed 'I am God' during a deposition." 
 
 10. "The beauty of me is that I'm very rich." 
 
 11. "I don't have friends at NASA. Bunch of nerds." 
 
 12. "[That] is an oxymoron, like 'liberal government' or 'female scientist'." ||||| 'Saturday Night Live' Casts Alec Baldwin as Its New Donald Trump 
 
 Executive producer Lorne Michaels made the decision to put the 'SNL' guest-host record-holder in the part over the summer. 
 
 Saturday Night Live viewers who tune in for the Oct. 1 season premiere are going to see a very familiar face in a very important role. 
 
 Alec Baldwin will debut his Donald Trump impression on the episode — a part he will play for the entire season, sources tell The Hollywood Reporter. 
 
 The reality star turned Republican presidential nominee was played last season by Darrell Hammond, a onetime castmember (and SNL Trump) who returned to the show in 2014 as its announcer. Hammond will remain with the series as its announcer and continue to appear on the show periodically. Before Hammond, Trump was played by castmember Taran Killam, whose contract was not picked up for season 42. 
 
 Trump himself hosted the show in November 2015, amid much controversy and calls for SNL to "#DumpTrump" over the candidate's perceived racial bias. 
 
 Executive producer Lorne Michaels made the decision to cast the 58-year-old Baldwin in the part of Trump over the summer. A close personal friend of Michaels' who also starred on the Michaels-produced NBC sitcom 30 Rock, Baldwin officially signed on earlier this week and taped a promo that debuted on social media on Wednesday. 
 
 The arrangement is similar to the casting last season of Larry David to play Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders over multiple episodes — an idea that paid off in huge comic dividends with winning sketches like "Bern Your Enthusiasm," a send-up of David's long-running HBO hit. 
 
 Baldwin has deep ties to SNL, having guest-hosted a record-setting 16 times since his debut in 1990. (Steve Martin is right on his tail at 15.) In that time, he has performed more than a dozen celebrity impressions, including Al Pacino, Bono, Harvey Fierstein, Tony Bennett and Marlon Brando. He's even taken on a Republican presidential hopeful before, playing Texas Gov. Rick Perry in a 2011 cold-open sketch mocking the GOP debates. 
 
 But this will be his first time playing Trump — a candidate about whom he's had ambivalent feelings in the recent past. Baldwin told Howard Stern in June 2015 that he "would love to see Trump be the Republican nominee ... [He's a] huge campaign finance reform person." But in a May 2016 interview with Ellen DeGeneres, Baldwin said, "We don't really want a president who looks like he's been dipped in movie popcorn butter." And in June of this year, he told The Telegraph that Trump is "the first candidate made of hate." 
 
 The Oct. 1 premiere will feature Margot Robbie as host and musical guest The Weeknd. The following week, on Oct. 8, Hamilton creator and star Lin-Manuel Miranda will assume hosting duties, with Twenty One Pilots appearing as musical guest. 
 
 Exactly one month later, U.S. citizens will cast their votes in the general election — and Baldwin will learn whether he is playing a president or an also-ran.
– People were already having a hard time telling Jack Donaghy and Donald Trump apart, so why not? According to the Hollywood Reporter, Alec Baldwin will be playing Trump during the upcoming season of Saturday Night Live, starting with the season premiere Oct. 1. Trump was most recently portrayed by current SNL announcer (and former SNL Trump) Darryl Hammond and castmember Taran Killam, who was let go over the summer. Now it appears the show will try to recapture the success it had keeping Larry David around to play Bernie Sanders last season. Baldwin, who played Rick Perry during the last presidential election cycle, has called Trump "the first candidate made of hate." How much we see of his Trump impression will probably depend on what happens in November.