If you’re in the market for a rooster, a woman in Michigan has one she’s looking to give away. 
 
 In an expletive-filled Facebook post, Denell McCaul, of Clarksville, Michigan, said that she wants to give away her rooster “FREE to good home. Well, any home really.” 
 
 The rooster, which McCaul called an “inconsiderate jerk,” is apparently up bright and early at 5:30 each morning, which the woman said is perfect “if your alarm is broken.” She added the rooster “has no snooze button but will be quiet just long enough for you to fall back to sleep and then he'll start back up with his obnoxious cock-a-doodle-doing right outside of your windows.” 
 
 McCaul, who owns several chickens according to another Facebook post, implied the rooster has superpowers. 
 
 “It's like he knows where you sleep and can zone in on that particular window so maybe he has some sort of special x-ray vision where he can see sleeping people behind walls,” she wrote. 
 
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 McCaul also joked the rooster was “an instructor of interpretive dance,” because of the way she looked while chasing the animal away. 
 
 “He is also a perfect rooster if you want to start running... around your yard... while you're trying to get away from him,” McCaul said. “He no longer goes after me as he is also an instructor of interpretive dance. Or at least that's what I imagine it looked like as I went after him flapping my arms, jumping up and down, kicking at him, yelling and screaming, and swinging a mop in his direction.” 
 
 McCaul concluded her Facebook ad by saying she’ll give away the rooster free of charge, but only if you can catch the animal, as she wants “to see your first interpretive dance lesson.” 
 
 As of Tuesday night the post had been shared more than 57,000 times. ||||| You can return a faulty alarm clock to the store, but what about a faulty rooster? 
 
 In hopes of getting her out-of-control pet rooster off her hands, Denell McCaul posted a lengthy rant to Facebook last week offering to give the rooster away to just about anyone willing to take it. 
 
 McCaul writes that the "inconsiderate jerk" crows every morning at 5:30 a.m. without fail. Really though, this picture says it all: 
 
 "He has no snooze button but will be quiet just long enough for you to fall back to sleep and then he'll start back up with his obnoxious cock-a-doodle-doing right outside of your windows," she writes. 
 
 Another con: "He is also a perfect rooster if you want to start running... around your yard... while you're trying to get away from him." 
 
 McCaul's post lays it all out, in case you've been looking for a pet from hell. 
 
 I mean, he is free though.
– Roosters aren't for everyone. The much-maligned male chicken is banned in cities across the US, and now one woman in a small town in Michigan is so fed up with hers that she posted an expletive-ridden rooster rant on Facebook last week. Largely hailed as hilarious, her post has gone viral, with roughly 73,000 shares as of this writing. Denell McCaul notes that her "a--hole rooster" is such an "inconsiderate jerk" that he wakes her up at 5:30am every single morning. Even worse, he has no "snooze button," but will quiet down just long enough for her to drift back to sleep before he starts up again "with his obnoxious cock-a-doodle-doing right outside of your windows." Mashable jokes that the rooster is the "pet from hell," but many of the 36,000 comments point out that he's simply behaving like a rooster—even if that means being an inconsiderate jerk of an alarm clock. But there's more: McCaul adds that the rooster, who is free to anyone, is "a perfect rooster if you want to start running ... around your yard ... while you're trying to get away from him." His third charm is that, while being chased off with a mop, his "student" makes him look like "an instructor of interpretive dance." "So, if you're looking for an alarm clock with the only setting being 5:30 a.m., a personal trainer and a dance instructor, I have the perfect rooster that is able to fill all 3 of those positions FOR FREE!" McCaul knows a thing or two about chickens; Fox News points out that she owns several. So maybe this one is worthy of her profane plea. (Even animal control couldn't catch one man's rooster.)