To be honest, after hearing a few things about this film and that it's being compared to The Dirty Dozen, I was not surprised at how funny, light and enjoyable this film was. It starts off on a very light and 70's style mood type opening credit sequence with Sergio Leone western-style graphics and a theme song worthy of A Bridge Too Far. And it continues throughout to be a fun filled movie with likable characters and those good old war film shootouts with a guy shooting at a German and the German grabbing his gut and falling to the ground. Let's face it, we love that stuff.

It also has a few twists to the plot and a few memorable scenes and lines, you seriously need to watch this if you're any kind of a movie buff.


I viewed this movie because the QT movie of the same title came out in 2009. I enjoyed the drama of this movie, the plot twists, and action. I was raised in the era of Clint Eastwood's Italian westerns and while this was a low budget Italian made film, it contains some of the elements that makes those movies so great.

Slightly like the Dirty Dozen this movie remains true to history and looks deep into human nature. There is a lot of good action scenes and the acting is great for the style. There are better action war films to watch but few that will remain a classic like this one.

While I did not enjoy the 2009 movie by QT, I must thank him for directing my attention to this title. Enzo Girolami Castellari is by far a much better director from viewing both movies of the same title. My advice is to rent both and come to your own conclusions.


Enzo Castellari's B movie "Quel maledetto treno blindato" is nowadays probably most recognizable because its English title "The Inglorious Bastards" inspired the title of Quentin Tarantino's 2009 movie. Castellari's movie contains a similar plot, with American GIs killing Nazis. In this case, our heroes are about to get taken to prison at the beginning, when their captors get killed by Nazi gunfire. So, the now free convicts decide to make their way to neutral Switzerland. Along the way, there's plenty of goose-stepping goons to shoot, and there's even some hot women. The main point of the movie is to show Fred Williamson off as a cool tough guy.

So, this isn't one that you're supposed to interpret as a Fellini-style film. This is pure, unadulterated fun. Really cool.

I bet that Brad Pitt's comment at the end of Tarantino's version not only reflected what Tarantino probably assumed about his movie, but what Castellari probably assumed about this one.


A group of American convicts in WWII Europe escapes in transport and makes their way for the Swiss border. Along the way they encounter German platoons -- lots of shoot outs ensue. Eventually, they come across another American contingent and are mistaken for a special ops team whose plan is to bomb a Nazi train carrying some sort of big fancy weapon. More shoot outs ensue.

Leave your hat and your desire for plot logic at the door if you want to enjoy this bargain-bin version of "The Dirty Dozen." Much of this film doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but you won't realize it doesn't make sense until after the movie's over, because while you're watching it it's easy to be distracted by the energy of the storytelling and film-making. One thing this movie has is style.

Bo Svenson heads the cast of mostly unknowns, though Ian Bannen (who has an Academy Award nomination to his credit, though not for this) brings some actorly street cred to the film as a general. The movie makes no effort whatsoever to capture the period feel of 1944 Europe. The various pornstaches on display are pure 1978.

Grade: A-


Like a lot of folks, I had only known about INGLORIOUS BASTARDS through word of mouth. I had read user comments enthusiastically praising the film and was anxious to see it for myself. And, I'm so glad I did! Enzo G. Castellari's INGLORIOUS BASTARDS is a phenomenal war film, with superbly orchestrated action scenes and a really unique premise. It allows those who have committed wrong to make up for their mistakes in a very dangerous mission where the likelihood of survival is low.

A small group of soldiers to be court-marshaled for bad behavior while serving in WWII escape a German attack while being transfered by their superiors to be tried for their crimes. Unable to re-join their American military due to their potential death by firing squad, they instead pursue the difficult task of moving through occupied France in the hopes of making it to neutral Switzerland, evading constant threats by stationed(..or moving)Nazi forces throughout the country-side. After picking up a German defector, the group encounter a number of hostile threats, using him as a possible method of escaping them, until the unfortunate slaughter of their own men, costumed in Nazi uniforms. In a twist of fate, they instead will assume the roles of the American soldiers they shot on accident by going on a frightening mission, in assistance with French freedom fighters(partisans)to commandeer a train containing a deadly war-head, Colonel in town to disarm it. When everything seems to be on schedule, the mission suffers a major set-back when a second train featuring a host of German soldiers arrives in the village where the first was supposed to stop, with many men dead after all is said and done.

Great cast to accompany Enzo G. Castellari's series of exciting, thrilling shootouts. Bo Svenson as Lt. Robert Yeager, who acquires the leadership role of the team when he leads them out of a major jam where German and American soldiers are engaged in combat. Understanding German, having blond hair and blue eyes(..statuesque and fitting the profile of the typical Kraut), Yeager offers potential escape from sticky situations. Pvt. Fred Canfield(The Hammer, Fred Williamson)is the muscle of the group, his being black making things a bit tough when they are trying to go through a variety of German checkpoints. He often finds himself at odds with Tony(Peter Hooten), a gambler who has been up for Court Martial twice before his latest conviction of murder..Tony is a racist and makes the mistake of confronting Canfield one too many times, the result his being tossed for a loop! Nick(Michael Pergolani), an Italian thief whose pickpocketing(..and his abilities at forging documents!) actually benefits the group during their journey! Berle(Jackie Basehart), tried to desert, his sickening fear of war often causing his bowels to malfunction. Adolf(Raimund Harmstorf)is the German prisoner the team comes across, who willingly helps them along the way, before his fate is sealed with they encounter the American soldiers disguised as Nazi officers. Veronique(Michel Constantin)is the brave leader of the partisans and Nicole(Debra Berger)is a nurse whose family were murdered by a German air raid..she's Tony's love interest and bravely helps her people temporarily secure a village captured by Germans. Ian Bannen has the role of Colonel Buckner, the one responsible for disarming the warhead who establishes the plan to raid the train, including the plot to explode a bridge.

Expert use of slow motion at the end and the numerous machine gun combats between our anti-heroes/partisans and their German adversaries really highlight this great adventure. The climax featuring the train and it's station is dynamic and plenty suspenseful. Fine sequence where Yeager, Tony, and Nick must rescue Canfield and Buckner from a castle containing a host of German officers. A real must-see for action fans clamoring for perilous situations featuring a band of soldiers with no home, attempting to salvage their lost reputations. Many of the war torn sequences where director Enzo G. Castellari displays the carnage left by a parade of warfare is stunning. Good humorous touches here and there, with Williamson and Svenson given plum roles to flex their macho personas.


This week is the release of QT's Inglorious Bast(e)erds but i will not be able to see it as the film is an 18 and i am 15 but will see it when it comes out on DVD. So instead i bought the original Inglorious Bastards that QT himself recommends and so do i.

The film has a cool premise. Six or so rebellious solders are off to a court Marshall to be sent away for life for their crimes but when their truck that is transporting them is bombed and attacked they escape and try to get to the neutral country of Switzerland. But along the way they are mistaking for another group and have to carry out a deadly mission to get rid of train load of Nazis. I can understand if you find QT's version offencive but this is just pure fun, a film which holds no punches and takes no prisoners.

It's a far fetched film which surprised me, a lot. Their guns never run out of bullets and we find that a sub-machine gun is the best gun in the world for accuracy. The films Major or more secretive selling point is that it is a funny take on other films like the dirty dozen and older spaghetti western characters. The film isn't unintentionally funny the film is actually side split-tingly fun at times and pulls of some great one liners like

"Do you speak English?" " Em F*ck you F*ck s*it Balls"

So if you watch this prepare to laugh

The film's action scenes are also very creative, with over the top action and a body count that i lost track of. It's is a lot of fun to watch and even better is there is a mild amount of sympathy to some of the characters especially Gi Bro which was unexpected.

The only reason it get's a seven because it just is nothing special. While a lot of fun it just isn't wild enough and doesn't have the a lot mayhem which is what i was expecting. It is also edited a bit funnily. It will skip long periods of time and expect us to know what is happening or going on.

While QT's will have the Tarintino flare about it, The original is just pure adrenaline filled fun which makes you think if David Zucker ( Airplane) or John Huges made a war film this is what it would be like .

7/10


I don't usually like war films, but I've really got to hand it to Enzo G. Castellari for this one; what we have is a true balls to the wall, gritty and violent exploitation masterpiece from the time when a bastard was called a bastard (and not a 'basterd'). The film works principally because rather than focusing on the war itself, it focuses on a group of people thrown into the war; and their personal experiences, which principally consist of blowing German heads off German shoulders. The film begins with a convoy taking a group of American soldiers off to prison for their various crimes against the army. En route to the prison, they are attacked by the Germans; and a group of five men manages to escape. They plan to head for Switzerland; the only neutral land around. However, on their way there; they are again attacked by Germans and forced to find their way on foot through the woods. The film then follows the group as they negotiate their way to Switzerland, and end up becoming involved with a plan to steal a valuable weapon from a German train.

The main reason this film works so well is simply down to the fact that it's such a blast! The film is entertaining from the first minute to the very end; and this is achieved by a bunch of interesting characters, some well worked humour; and best of all, a plethora of violence. I'd really love to know what the body count for this movie is as it must be astronomical! The film is Italian; but really you'd never guess unless you're familiar with Enzo G. Castellari's work (which includes crime films and Jaws rip-offs) as the main cast are all American and the film was shot in English. The film is often said to be a rip off of The Dirty Dozen (and indeed, the tagline nods to this) although having (unbelievably) not seen The Dirty Dozen myself, I can't really comment on that. The plot flows very well throughout and there's always plenty going on to keep the interest high. It's a surprisingly high quality film too; very well made and the special effects are good. Overall, this is an absolutely great war movie Quentin Tarantino is going to have to work hard if his "reimaging" is going to top it!


Inglorious bastards, released in 1977/78, became one of those films banned in Sweden. Had I grown up watching it as a kid, this would be the war movie to remember, instead the Swedish audience had to stick with rather cheap takes on world war II.

A rag tag bunch of (U.S. soldiers) misfits escapes the death penalty by firing squad and journeys into German occupied France in an attempt to find refuge in Switzerland. In doing so they accidentally kill a German squad who turns out to be Yankee special forces and now they're forced to undertake a "mission impossible", by blowing up a mobile research faculty, a train lab if you will and demolish a mobile V2 rocket system.

The story is original although in features all the commando raid ingredients, like sneaking into a SS-Castle, blowing up a bridge and stab German sentries from behind. It might sound like a cliché filled, typical classic, and in someways it is, but here is where the similarities stops in comparison with all other vintage war flicks.

Some examples: The movie is European so you don't get to see Hollywood-ish standard crap, with Stars and stripes in slow motion, dying soldiers telling how much they love their wives and so on and so forth. Even, though many scenes are shot against animated backgrounds, it contains one of the best of it's kind, take notice of the huge field of scrap metal after the Americans have dropped a plethora of nasty bombs.

To be this a old, it's a movie that sometimes is breathtaking and I got flabbergasted by the fact how detailed and accurate the German army is portrayed; they wear Zeltbahn camouflage tunics, all German dialog is in German and it surpasses the standard phrases like: "Achtung!" and "Granate!".

Some scenes are in the same league as Cross of Iron and Sergio Leones spaghetti westerns. The french resistance are though and they all speak french and are not clowns.

You don't get to see Saving Private Ryan and Band of Brothers style violence, instead the action sequences are very stylized and rather gritty.

You don't get to know the main characters and the dialog seems deliberately directed in the course of being over the top unsentimental and cold.

It's very noir-ish in the way the dialog is spoken and those who long for a really crappy, laughable B-movie will be disappointed. It's 30 years old and contains many scenes seen in many movies made after Inglorious Bastards; the air of the movie is filled with scenes, seen in other movies such as Raiders of the Lost Ark, Enemy at the Gates, Stalingrad, Das Boot.

Furthermore: Take notice of the color of blood. Back then you could only watch bloodbaths in orange, here the blood is really realistic. The scenery reminds me of scale model dioramas and train sets in combination with European country side.

1977 the Vietnam war marched into to the history books as a sadistic conflict and social democratic Sweden were a nation banning all sorts of military conflicts worlds wide. I suppose this was the reason why the Swedish public never got to see this. A true classic gone missing.

The not so cool parts are few but stands out. The scene (although Wehrmacht did "loan" enemy vehicles) where a huge convoy passes through is a bit over the top containing just a tad much American half tracks although most other vehicles are accurate and the T & A scene with naked Valkyries firing MP-40's are a bit to sleazy for my taste.

Summary: The Dirty Dozen, The Great Escape, Where Eagles Dare, Guns of Navarone are pretty bad in comparison and I almost hold a tearful respect towards this movie in the course of being so obscured. Quentin Tarantino is the last person to re-write and direct a movie like this if he don't get a grip after his total fiasco Grindhouse: Deathproof.

Had this movie been made before Ryan and Brothers this would be the movie to set the standard with todays technique.

I enjoyed this movie very much, it's good to be positively surprised! This is a boy adventure well made and with the heart in the right place.

Good craftsmanship.


"Quel Maledetto Treno Blindato" aka. "Inglorious Bastards" of 1978 is a highly entertaining little piece of War/action exploitation cinema brought to you by no one else than cult-director Enzo G. Castellari. This has many similarities to Robert Aldtrich's classic "The Dirty Dozen" (1967), only that this one is pure, awesome late 70s Italian exploitation. The prolific Hollywood stars of "The Dirty Dozen" are replaced with exploitation regulars like Bo Svenson and, most memorably, the great Fred Williamson. In France of 1944, a bunch of WW2 US-Army soldiers are about to be brought to a POW prison for different offenses, when the Military Police truck they are being transported in is suddenly attacked by Germans. Five of them take the opportunity to escape, among them an officer (Bo Svenson) and the super-tough black Pvt. Fred Canfield (Fred Williamson). They decide to flee to Switzerland, which is not easy, since they have both the Military Police and the Germans against them... Basically, the five unite all the characteristics that the twelve members of the "Dirty Dozen" had. Bo Svenson and Fred Williamson basically are the heroes of the pack, Williamson being the tough and super-cool black dude and Svenson the clever Strategist. The rest of the bunch include a trickster with an affinity to jokes and theft, basically the guy responsible for the fun-part, a young wuss who almost wets his pants throughout the film, and a sinister and racist jerk. The supporting cast includes a bunch of familiar faces for exploitation fans, I was especially delighted to see the great Donal O'Brien in a small role. Still, the main reason to watch this is Fred Williamson, who is, once again, coolness personified. The film does not have the great storyline or character-drawing of "The Dirty Dozen", but it makes up for this with lots of action, explosions, bloody battle and occasional female nudity. Even so, the film is not nearly as outrageously violent as I had expected it to be (and neither is it very sleazy). Yet, this is a highly entertaining and great fun to watch War/Action flick that I highly recommend to all my fellow exploitation-buffs!


This film may be from 1978, but it looks at least 10-15 years older than that. You will see an awful lot of German soldiers hurling their weapons in the air as if they were made of plastic and jumping as high as possible while waving their arms. This means they have either been gunned down or blown up by bombs. A single stab wound, a punch or a kick to the face, or a tap to the small of the back with a barrel of a gun causes immediate death or unconsciousness to the fragile enemy Germans. Sometimes the Germans are so in shock at seeing the Americans that they just stand there, waiting to get shot or punched. It's pretty funny, really. The fire scenes are totally unrealistic and look like someone set some toys on fire. I watched the UNCUT EDITION and assume the exploding blood packs used toward the end of the movie were not seen in the original. Take away the blood packs and you got a family film.

The storyline wasn't bad except the part about the German POW who escaped (meaning he didn't like being a POW) and is again captured but sides with the Americans... and the pickpocket who had been in jail so long that his hair had grown hippie length but always had a close shave.

The acting itself was solid and very believable. Other than that, Quel maledetto treno blindato is pretty much like a cartoon. It is an excellent time killer on a rainy Saturday afternoon.


A nice bit of escapist entertainment, this Italian made World War II actioner concerns a group of American prisoners, heading to the stockade for such infractions as desertion and outright murder. An attack by the Naziss allows some of them to escape, and they head for Switzerland, which they figure is neutral enough to be reasonably safe. However, they end up agreeing to take part in a daring mission. They'll steal a V2 warhead from a Nazi train so the French Underground can acquire it.

The cooler-than-cool cast includes an amiable Bo Svenson as Lt. Robert Yeager, the one officer in the group of Bastards, and the always badass Fred "The Hammer" Williamson as Private Fred Canfield. Who could resist any film with these two guys as the stars? The cast also includes Peter Hooten as Tony, who's kind of a jerk, Michael Pergolani as Nick (his long hair is certainly anachronistic), Jackie Basehart as Berle, Michel Constantin as Veronique, gorgeous Debra Berger as Nicole, Raimund Harmstorf as Adolf Sachs (the German prisoner who for a brief time is part of the group), and the always delightful Ian Bannen as Col. Buckner.

Director Enzo G. Castellari is very good with this sort of material. While he gives his colorful cast opportunity to create some interesting characters, he's at his best with his action scenes. Fans of this sort of thing can enjoy a hearty serving of violence, a high body count, some wonderful countryside vistas, and a story with a strong forward momentum. Nazis always make for wonderfully nasty, vile baddies one can have a lot of fun booing, and the ones here are no different. Francesco De Masi contributes an excellent music score. The film gets off to a good start with some striking visuals during the opening credits sequence. It's all lively throughout, but things truly switch into another gear for the climax on the train. It's the most exciting part. One enjoyable sequence has some of our boys running into some naked young ladies in a stream. So Castellari knows how to inject exploitative elements into his film as well.

Certainly well known now for giving Quentin Tarantino inspiration (as well as a title) for his most recent film, "The Inglorious Bastards" is worth watching for fans of the World War II action film. It's very agreeable entertainment from start to finish.

8/10


The prolific Italian helmer Enzo G. Castellari of "Any Gun Can Play" and "Payment in Blood" not only made terrific Spaghetti westerns, but he also made one of the best European B-movie World War II thrillers. This half-of-a-dozen "Dirty Dozen" actioneer has court-martialed American soldiers and a reckless Air Force pilot escape from an escort of MPs after they clash with the enemy. The Germans attack the convoy and the MP guards actually shoot at the prisoners as they bail out of the trucks for cover. Strapping tall blond Bo Svenson is the pilot who used his P-51 Mustang to visit his girlfriend. Fred Williamson endures racial slurs and prejudice. Once they are free of the MPs, our anti-heroes decide to head for Switerland. Along the way, they wipe out a bunch of commandos and find themselves replacing them to help a stubborn, hidebound colone (Ian Bannen) destroy a Nazi train with top secret weapons. The heroes are sympathetic and charismatic. The music is memorable and the Castellari orchestrates the action with elaborate style. There are couple of surprises and the guy who survives is not the one that you think will live. The train crash is pretty neat. Exciting and fun.


10/09/09

Many bastards these days: I had the chance to see Quentin Tarantino's latest film Inglourious Basterds a couple of days ago and last night I finally saw Enzo G. Castellari's 1978 film Quel maledetto treno blindato, better known as The Inglorious Bastards. I say finally because I received the 3-disc DVD of "Bastards" I ordered I don't know two or so moths ago and between this and that I didn't saw it till last night. So, not long ago in IMDb there was a link to a list of the WWII films you should see before seeing Tarantino's great film (if not his bestthat's certainly another story). Can't remember all the titles the blogger mentioned but I do remember that The Dirty Dozen, Where Eagles Dare, Kelly's Heroes, The Great Escape, Ilsa She Wolf of the SS and Samuel Fuller's The Big Red One were part of the list. Of course "Bastards" was also part and well, I will be trying to see all of those films now not before but after Tarantino's "Basterds" and yes, I'm still a newcomer in regards of war pictures and yes if not for QT I probably would have never seen this film, hell anyways it would have never been released on DVD or Blu-Ray (the 3-disc edition contains a really great conversation with QT and Castellari).

Anyway, in "Bastards" the bastards ain't some sort of special team of soldiers, ain't on a really big mission, the bastards are well just that, a bunch of inglorious bastards that will be together just because, well I was going to write the word destiny but I better write that just because some Nazis attacked the prison convoy they were part of. By the end they were the only survivors, no other prisoners, no military, just them, not quite exceptional soldiers, in a Nazi-occupied France, certainly without been able to go back to their own lines, just trying to get to Switzerland.

And they are Lt. Robert Yeager (Bo Svenson), Pvt. Fred Canfield (Fred Williamson), Tony (Peter Hooten), Nick (Michael Pergolani) and Berle (Jackie Basehart). I began this comment by saying "many bastards" but of course not in a bad way and basically I could begin my comment saying something like "many truly memorable characters with both Bastards and Basterds". Here each one of the mentioned five delivers many awesome moments: we have the two bad-asses in Svenson and Williamson's characters, the truly skilled soldiers that can easily beat the s*** out of any Nazi or, if necessary, any American. With Tony we have the classic annoying dude who likes to see how far he can go with being annoying to certain soldiers and with Berle, well we have basically the "kid" that can't deal with war and that will be protected by both Yeager and Canfield. I have only left to talk a bit about one of the bastards, the long-haired Italian dude Nick: boy, he is so much fun! He steals not only pretty much the film but also pretty much anything!

The language thing is really good, I mean you know aside of English we have German, French and Italian. It's fun sometimes and that type of fun is also in "Basterds"; here we have first a German soldier with the bastards and he at one point will give Tony and the Italian dude a surprise, that is not quite as dangerous as in "Basterds" but really funny: Tony thinks this German only speaks German so he insults and stuff, you know (in "Basterds" the Jew Hunter, Christoph Waltz's character at one point surprises everybody with his really good Italian! And well, Brad Pitt's character and his Italian is just fun!). Also I loved the part with the French guy who apparently knows how to speak English"s***, son of a bitch, f****** bastards"!

There's plenty of action in the film and plenty of great funny bits (most of them coming from the Italian dude), it's a very entertaining adventure meanwhile our bastards get to be part of a real Allies mission. It's great because at first it was just more of the same, I mean more killings and more lies with the bastards, now they killed a bunch of American soldiers thinking they were Germans and took advantage of the confusion of the French pretending to be, this time, certainly not Germans but other Americans, the American soldiers they just had killed, the American soldiers that were especially trained for a mission. But by the end of the day the Colonel in charge has in front of him not quite "a gang of deserters, cut-throats and thieves" but a skilled team of real soldiers ready for the mission and well, a damn gun pointing to him! What follow is the deadly mission, them bastards doing just a pretty darn glorious work. It's exciting.

PS: for a little fun check out the awesomely visible wire of one of the killed by Canfield Nazis at 00:34:00.


I bought this as it was cheap and of course like many had never heard of it until Tarantino remade it. However these types of movies I do enjoy and so took a chance. I sat and watched it with a big bag or doritos and a six pack and found it very entertaining which is the name of the game. The characters are likable rogues and quite cool. There are several stand out moments in the movie - especially topless German soldier girls firing at our bastards with machine guns - and the ending is also quite well executed.

the only gripe is sometimes the action is a little repetitive after a while but its only a small gripe. I would recommend this movie if you want a similar but more trashy kind of Dirty Dozen or Wild Bunch.


Well, since Tarantino's remake is in the air, the accessibility of this film has widened a bit, and I managed to catch a midnight showing. If you're a fan of Italian Exploitation this will do well for you pretty much from frame one. I'm not so much of a fan, but indeed found this movie to be quite the entertaining adventure. And in fact that was what was so wonderful about it--lose the moralizing of most WWII movies, lose a lot of the American hero myth making.... um, lose a bit of the Italians', uh, involvement in it, apparently..... and you get boys with toys blowing up bridges and cackling madly the whole way.

I especially liked Nick. In a group of rascals, he out-rascalled all of them with his smooth moves, quirky facial expressions, and rogueish ways. He's a little like what Steve McQueen would have been if Steve McQueen was ugly and not a badass. Otherwise, exactly like Steve McQueen. I also couldn't help but enjoy the shout-out to blaxploitation in the character of Tony, who kicked ass and took names.

Being the exploity goodness it is, there's also broads. During precisely zero of the scenes involving broads did the broads make sense. Figures.

Anyway, the tagline sez "Whatever the Dirty Dozen did, they did it dirtier" is true to the point that these guys have a lot more fun and a lot less issue with what they're doing, but I still find the ending to the Dirty Dozen to be extremely morally defunct, whereas the excited escapism of this movie doesn't really serve towards such a dark ending. So yeah, at least these guys were a little cinematically removed from the Total War aspect of ol' dubyadubyaeyeeye. These guys are literally dirtier while being less gritty.

--PolarisDiB


The Inglorious Bastards - or "That Bloody Armored Train" or "Counterfeit Commandos" or "Deadly Mission" or "G.I. Bro" or "Hell's Heroes" or more, depending on what version of the film you are watching - has seen a rise in attention by the release of Quentin Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds. Unlike the similarity between the two films' titles may suggest, outside of the fact that the central characters of both films are a group of misfit soldiers in a French World War II setting, there is little to compare this 1978 Italian-made The Inglorious Bastards from the 2009 Quentin Tarantino-made Inglourious Basterds.

This B-movie spaghetti war film takes us to a still mostly NAZI-occupied France in World War II where a handful of American soldiers are on their way to the nearest military prison (or noose) for a variety of crimes via a truck convoy. In a glorious stroke of luck, five of these inglorious bastards survive a German air attack on the convoy and head for neutral Switzerland, only to end up participating in a French Resistance raid.

The Inglorious Bastards is a pretty bad movie, though it does stand out as better than most B-movie spaghetti war films. It is a Dirty Dozen-style shoot'em'up action film that ends up not very spectacular at all (although there are some scenes on top of a moving train that is reminiscent of 1983's Octopussy) and tries to be poignant now and then, humorous failing with every attempt. Certainly not historically accurate, The Inglorious Bastards features a few elements that stand out as definitely not of the World War II era: side burns, long hair, and handlebar mustaches specifically did not often make it into the ranks of the United States Army in the 1940s.

The cinematography and production values put the film a few steps ahead of much of the spaghetti war film genre but everything is still very cheap, looking and feeling like the film was made in 1968 as opposed to its actual 1978 release. But that's not all: the acting is also awful. Fred Williamson is easily the strongest member of the cast because of his extremely affable tough guy persona but the rest of the cast members seem to either overact, looking like clowns, or are about as animated as a shipwreck - Peter Hooten is especially bad, managing to both overplay and underplay his role from scene to scene.

But The Inglorious Bastards does include a fairly high body count, a lot of unintentional B-movie humor, a monsoon of machinegun fire, and a river full of naked fräuleins. If all of that is enough to do it for you, then I suggest you have at The Inglorious Bastards.


The great Enzo G. Castellari made (in 1977) a war movie in the style of The Dirty Dozen or The Longest Day. Of course, Castellari had to add his usual tons of slapdash violence and action. This is the kind of war movie they stopped making after Vietnam, so it really has a distinct nostalgic feeling to it. QUEL MALEDETTO TRENO BLINDATO makes war out to seem really fun and exiting, contrary to other war flicks of that period such as THE DEER HUNTER or APOCALYPSE NOW. Instead, it is a harmless, exciting, even ludicrous action film. I challenge anyone to count the number of deaths in this film and send me a rough estimate! The cast was great, the acting pretty good, the action scenes well done (as usual for my man Enzo), and the music was appropriately nostalgic as well. The only thing this film doesn't have working for it, is the fact that many scenes featured the same actors dying over and over again. I found it kinda funny but some of you critics out there might just find it cheesy.


Quel maledetto treno blindato (aka Inglorious Bastards) has risen from the ranks of the rest of the obscure Italian made, American acted cheapies first of all because of Quentin Tarantino's reverence for the film and the fact that he plans to a remake of sorts under the same title; second of all even though Tarantino's word is enough PR to get any obscure film to raise from the depths of the unknown into popular culture, it wouldn't work if the film wasn't any good. No problem there because this film is superb.

A group of soldiers are rounded up in a truck to be court-martialled. On the way to their destination, a German fighter jet opens fire on the Americans. Five soldiers get out and make a run for it. Now as fugitives they are on the run from both the Americans and the Germans as they battle their way to the Swiss border to freedom.

This film is a little known masterpiece that embodies the traits of a very pedestrian style war film. There is no technical war idioms which are common to the genre, the dialogue is cool and hip. This is basically the sort of war film that I would have made because unlike the typical other films in the genre, they are not really out to defend their country, only themselves. There is nothing to dislike about this film at all. Highly recommended.


The fifth "The Hire" movie is an impressive little short. It's impressive because of the story, that is helped by its gritty atmosphere.

The atmosphere is wonderful and typically Mexican style like. It really reminded me of "Man on Fire". It's gritty and sets the perfect mood for the story. The great cinematography is from 2 times Academy Award winner Robert Richardson and the music is from the talented composer Harry Gregson-Williams.

The movie and its story know to impress and it has some wonderful dialog, altogether with a powerful ending is what makes this movie a bit of a must see.

8/10


This short film occurs in January 13, 2001, where a Times war photographer -Harvey Jacobs (Stellan Skarsgård)- is wounded while witnessing a massacre at Nuevo Colon by terrorists. In a desperate effort, the United Nations sends a vehicle to get him out, a BMW driven by Clive Owen.

This film, in comparison to any other film of the Hire series is possibly the best. The mark of Alejandro González Iñárritu is without contest the deepest one I've seen to date. It can't be denied that every second of the films matters in one way or another, either it is the feel of the environment, characters or even the state of mind. But since I'm a fan of his work I think I might be a little biased.

The real hero of the film is actually the photographer's mother (Lois Smith) who really made a spectacular performance. I've seen the film about five times and I am still touched by her performance. Great Film 9/10


Powder Keg has been promoted heavily on cable. The trailer for the very short film is excellent. The irony of the format of the very short film is that the trailer runs for about 1/10 the time of the whole film!

More is left out of the film than is in it. We are shown the short tale of a photojournalist who escapes from a horrific massacre; we aren't shown how he does it. We don't know what war this is, it is a stand-in for all of those nameless skirmishes in Latin America.

Clive Owen of the PBS Mystery series Second Sight stars as the 'Driver'. We don't know anything about him as well.

It's really difficult to make an effective short film, but director Alejandro Inarritu does a very good job. Yes, we've seen the plot before (though not so truncated), but the cinematography is grainy, jerky, and alive. You get a sense of the menace and desperation of the people of this unnamed place in fast glances out the window of the, yes, BMW.

Recommended.


Eliminate the country, the brutal government, most real names, and what you have is a look into the inner sole of what it is to be human. Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu does a masterful job with this piece based on a massacre of people and shooting of a war photographer. These BMW Films have all been exceptional. This is true art... when your friends complain about Hollywood, tell them they are not looking hard enough.


What makes this commercial really stick out from the others is the filming style, which seemed documentary-like. While I found this style a little annoying at first, I ended up actually enjoying it and liking the commercial for being different without being bad(like the one Ang Lee misdirected). The cinematography is very good, and gives us some great intense sequences. The acting is great, both by Clive Owen and Stellan Skarsgård. Owen must have gotten very much used to his character of The Driver by this point, so it's interesting to see him in a more emotional take on the character. Skarsgård is very good as the war photographer, and his final speech, though going very close to crossing over into being cliché, manages to work perfectly and arouse actual emotions in the viewer, rather than just being sappy, manipulative drivel(which this sort of thing almost always is). The action(the little there is) is great and the amount is just right. It's obvious that this was more about story and characters than action and thrills, and director Alejandro González Iñárritu pulls it off perfectly. It's rare to see something so short that manages to hold your interest without a lot of action and whilst managing to tell a story so beautifully and emotionally. While I prefer Ambush over this one, I think it's a great commercial. I recommend this to fans of the commercials and of this type of stories. 8/10


I was very surprised after watching the other films from the BMWs films "The Hire", because although all were clever and entertaining, none had the emotional power of this one. Guy Richie's was great but in a humorous way, and more as an homage to BMW's cars.... Powder Keg was about as deep and attaching and emotional and real as you can get in a 7 min film.

Shot in a documentary style way in 16mm, it's a great look at the genius of an upcoming director. 8-1/2 /10


The most dramatic episode of The Hire was ruined by the shaky camera effect and the quality taken for the image. Really, could be the director's decision, I never saw Babel, yet, so I don't know if it's just his style. Maybe yes, maybe no. What I know is that Powder Keg is the more serious The Hire episode, until now. Star was a jackass action-short. Powder Keg is a drama-action short, with reminders of war and terrorist crime.

SOME SPOILERS FROM NOW ON! BE AWARE!

The Swedish actor was alright, he portrayed a photographer who witnessed a massacre in Mexico. He was one the run, wounded by gunshots and the UN quickly sent someone to pick him up. That someone was the Driver. He eventually had to go to the New York Times. But, of course, the wounds were too deep, he got shot too and died right on the Driver's car. The Driver now shows a bit of his personality, gives the photographer's personal belongings to his mother and probably, goes to the Times' headquarters and gives the photos to them.

One small note: The photographer starts reminiscing as we see war outside the moving BMW. This is a beautiful scene for a commercial movie--


This short from The Hire-series looks totally different than the other ones. It is more real, like news footage. The Driver, of course again played by Clive Owen, has to save a war photographer (Stellan Skarsgard) who is shot. No funny moments this time, but action and suspense. Very well done.


Let me say first thanks to BMW. Though the original idea for The Hire movie series was inspired by commercial purposes (of course, they must sell cars), all movies are oriented to a real artistical approach more than to a market strategy. It's not just a matter of publicity... well done! This short by Alejandro Gonzales Inarritu is the best of the series. Alejandro is clearly one among the most talented directors of the new generation. His own powerful and dramatic way of shooting gives no way to compromises. Alejandro's language is made of cold lights, cameras never standing still, zooming and moving like it was a video reporter filming a battle. Take a look to his first (and of course, awarded and successful) movie Amores Perros and you will understand what I mean. Hope he will never give up his style for easier ways to make money. Great!!!


its almost ironic to call charlie chaplin unknown, but you truely learn how much you don't know about him with this series. It is getting you inside the mind of genius. The rare footage and personal interviews show you how secretive and personal chaplin was in life. If you are a silent film lover, this is a program you won't want to miss!


I picked up a DVD of this British series from the National Gallery of Art in Washington, DC and it's fitting that a filmmaker be featured prominently in an art gallery--especially since this film isn't a biography of Chaplin, but a step-by-step analysis of his working style. They did this by collecting outtakes that had been saved by Mutual Studios as well as through photos and even home movies. At first, I thought this all sounded very dry but as the film continued I realized what a great treasure this is. What I liked in particular was how they took two of his earlier non-Keystone comedies and analyzed the many, many changes the film underwent thanks to Chaplin's obsessive-compulsive film style. Considering what a gift he had for making films, this lengthy style of constructing films is forgivable and even understandable.

In addition to analyzing his shorts, the documentary also chooses to analyze CITY LIGHTS as well as THE GOLD RUSH and provides many behind the scenes insights. I really liked this, since GOLD RUSH might just be my very favorite silent film (though it's hard to say for sure, considering some of the great films of Lloyd and Keaton).

All-in-all, this is an absolute must for serious film students, historians and lovers of silent comedy. Considering all the pain and trouble they went to in making this film, it's no surprise that it earns a 10 of 10.

FYI--Fortunately, while this is a nearly perfect film about Chaplin, there are also two wonderful similar documentaries about Harold Lloyd ("American Masters", Harold Lloyd: The Third Genius) and Buster Keaton (Buster Keaton: A Hard Act to Follow)--both written by the same two writers who made this wonderful film. See them all if you get a chance!!

Also FYI--On the DVD is a 12 minute segment on how they assembled all the footage for the documentaries. It's worth a look to give you insight into this very laborious process.


Charles Chaplin was truly the first independent filmmaker - with the exception perhaps of Georges Melies. Chaplin wrote, directed, starred in and scored nearly all of his films. No one understood the craft of film-making (silent or otherwise) better than Chaplin. He never compromised his artistic vision, perfectionism, or his integrity. Charlie literally made his films up as he went along, rehearsing on film and discarding whatever didn't work. Such techniques would prove too costly and time consuming today. This documentary consists of some of Chaplin's best experiments - some of which he re-shot and much of which he ordered burned. Like many a magician, Chaplin didn't want his secrets getting out. Luckily, many of his best tricks are revealed here for posterity. It's all lovingly narrated by James Mason. And the scenes that were cut from THE CIRCUS, CITY LIGHTS and MODERN TIMES are as good as anything that ended up in the final releases. I wish this was available on DVD, as my tapes are beginning to wear out.


This delightful documentary shows the secrets of many clever tricks that were a mystery until two film historians studied Charles Chaplin's works. Highly recommended to any serious fan of Chaplin. The backwards hat trick alone is worth viewing the whole series.


When the series Hollywood was made in the late 1970s, it's producers had more than enough material for a series of over 10 episodes (as it was shown). Especially the material dealing with interviews of silent film period survivors. The producers decided to do several follow-up documentaries. Three eventually were made, about Chaplin, Keaton, and Lloyd. This was the first. Taken from the Chaplin family film vaults, it showed (in three episodes) scenes that were filmed by Chaplin from movies that were actually finished but re-cut (like CITY LIGHTS, THE CIRCUS, and THE CURE), as well as films that were made for private viewing (a film with visitor Sir Harry Lauder), and film that was created for projects that did not work out. It was a wonderful series, and all too brief - mostly due to the tragic fact that Chaplin did not save all the cut material from all his projects and films. Try to catch this on DVD.


Unknown Chaplin is a three part television series produced from outtakes and film clips edited from most of Charles Chaplin's well-known films. The first part focuses primarily on the Mutual period when Chaplin made twelve films in sixteen months. The film covers how Chaplin formed his own stock company to make films with much in the way John Ford would do a couple decades later. The film focuses on The Floorwalker, The Count, The Cure, and The Immigrant, while including clips of The Pawnbroker and The Adventurer. The film indicates how Chaplin rehearsed on film by viewing daily rushes and re-shooting scenes multiple times, how some gags worked by exploiting the variances in camera speed, and how Edna Purviance was not a trained actress and had to be shaped by Chaplin's direction.

The second part of the film focuses on The Kid, The Gold Rush, and City Lights. It includes interviews with Jackie Coogan, Lita Grey, Georgia Hale, Robert Parrish, Virginia Cherrill, and Sydney Chaplin. A great deal of time is spent on the location shooting for The Gold Rush and the many highlights from that film. Most interesting is the initial introduction of the tramp and the flower girl scene in City Lights. Chaplin had to solve the dilemma of how to make it plain to the audience that the blind flower girl thought the tramp was a rich man. It took a year and a half of patience and countless retakes for Chaplin to solve it.

The third part of the film focuses mostly on The Circus and the uncompleted film The Professor, but it also includes tidbits from City Lights, Modern Times, The Great Dictator, and Limelight. The third part showcases mostly scenes which were cut from Chaplin's final edit of his films influences some of his earlier silent pictures had on his later, more famous films. The film shows how Chaplin played an important role in the development of early cinema, combining his own artistic vision with the unbridled mayhem of his Mack Sennett days at the Keystone Company. Many of Chaplin's stock company get substantial screen time, including Edna Purviance, Eric Campbell, Albert Austin, Henry Bergman, John Rand, and Loyal Underwood. Major disappointments are the film's omissions of Chaplin's post-Limelight work, Monsieur Verdoux, and A Woman Of Paris, a box office failure upon its release now regarded as one of Chaplin's most important films and an adult film ahead of its time. James Mason narrates the film with appropriate earnestness. ***1/2 of 4 stars.


I sat down to watch this movie with my girlfriend, who loves cheap sci fi films, expecting to fall asleep at some point. Just when I was losing interest, I began to realize that I was watching a loose remake of "Treasure of the Sierra Madre", the great Humphrey Bogart-Walter Huston movie from 1948, one of my favorites.

I think the scene where the old man began dancing a jig and laughing crazily after finding the "precious" ore tipped me off. Although it was set on an asteroid, the plot was basically the same. The character in the 1948 film who wanted to horn in on their partnership was changed to a woman (Joan Chen) in this movie.

Rent both films and see if I'm right. I rate "Precious Find" a 3 out of 10 by the way.


As a devoted fan of Rutger Hauer I've seen some crappy productions. This, a remake of a western in a sci-fi setting, tops them all. Can anybody tell me why asteroids have an atmosphere and why you would use a pick-ax when you go there by spaceship?


tell you the truth i don't really know where to start with this 'movie'. i don't know what's worst, the ridiculous acting that makes me wanna cry, the silly so called 'special effects', the worst directing job i've ever seen or the dialogue that made me get the bucket in the middle of the movie.

i always thought of rutger hauer movies rather 'campy', but this one's so poor poor poor it's not even worth the tape it was recorded into, and it doesn't even make you laugh with it's poorness, it's just that poor.

the only good thing about this movie was it's length, i couldn't have taken another minute of it.

there's a better rutger hauer/joan chen movie that proves they CAN act,

it's called blood of heroes, watch that instead.


SPOILER Wow. A DVD with Rutger Hauer AND Joan Chen for only 69 DKK... A steal I thought - and I was right. In the negative sense!

This movie is simply the worst I have ever seen in my entire life.

The first thought that sprang to mind after the movie was: Why did I have to see this movie? Then Why did I have to spend time seeing this movie?

The only funny thing in the movie was when Rutger Hauer towards the end jumped to his death through a hole in the floor: He actually looked relieved finally to be able to leave the movie.

And that's my recommendation to everyone: Leave this movie alone.


Well, Hauer and Chen has done better acting but I really think we need movies like this. I kind of liked the movie because it still has a story to tell despite bad directing and low budget. The first thing that struck me was the bad effect's in the opening scenes but then I saw that it was computer generated graphics and not CGI in a time when Windows 95 was the hottest OS. So I can overlook that.

The movie has a few good unexpected twists but it's an all Hollywood movie so the end is highly predictable.

Inspite of all the bad things I had a good time watching this movie on DVD and I can recommend you to rent it or even buy it because it's an old movie and the price is really low. I bought the DVD and I will watch it a few times again.


PRC earned its reputation for bad movies, but "Border Feud" is from "The New PRC" and actually is pretty good.

Director Ray Taylor was usually capable and, except for some script supervising or directing errors, this runs pretty smoothly.

Al "Fuzzy" St. John would have been funnier -- seriously, he seldom makes a move that isn't at least a little funny -- if he hadn't been quite so intrusive, which is not his fault but that of the script or director.

Most of the characters are played by competent to even talented actors, even though most of them never became stars.

Except Al "Lash" La Rue, as it is spelled in the credits on this movie.

He seldom gets the compliments I think he deserved. Really, he is more than competent although, as another commenter said, there should have been more whip work.

La Rue and St. John were both very good cowboys, and "Lash" seems to have done most of his own stunt work.

The score wasn't always appropriate but it was always nice music and composer Albert Glasser should have been given screen credit.

To those of us for whom there is hardly such a thing as a bad western, "Border Feud," despite a misleading and pointless title, is a good one.

My copy is on a disk from "The Treasure Box Collection," and, except for being a few generations too old, is in pretty good shape.

There is also another Lash La Rue film, "Ghost Town Renegades," on the back side of the disk, although he is "LaRue" in that film's credits.


I remember seeing only one Lash LaRue film as a kid growing up, but the image of the black clad cowboy brandishing a bull whip has remained with me ever since. Seeing one of these "B" Westerns some sixty years after they were made is a neat exercise in nostalgia, and only goes to show how far films have come since the good old days.

As far as shoot 'em ups go, this one has a lot of them, about every ten minutes between different factions. Like many (most?) of these oaters, the title doesn't really have much to do with the story, though this one comes close. But instead of "Border Feud", why couldn't it have been the "Blue Girl Gold Mine Feud"? That would have made more sense and better described the action.

Lash LaRue's character is Marshal Cheyenne Davis, helping out Sheriff Fuzzy Q. Jones (Fuzzy St. John) sort out the differences between two feuding families over gold mine rights in the town of Red Gulch. However there's a third party interested in keeping hostilities going; Jack Barton (Bob Duncan) and his backer Doc Peters (Ian Keith) plan to move in when the families wipe each other out. It might have worked too, but with a cute Condon sister (Gloria Marlen) romanced by the opposing family's Bob Hart (Kenneth Farrell), the truth will have to make things right.

You can tell this PRC picture (Producers Releasing Corporation) film is an entirely low budget affair. Watch for a scene in the second half when Fuzzy shoots one of Barton's bad guys, he repositions himself ever so slightly so he can continue to fall down a stairway - no time for do-overs.

"Border Feud", along with most of these era Westerns are great for a one hour diversion, as long as they're not taken too seriously. What I'd like to know though, is how is it that no matter where Cheyenne is at the start of a gunfight, he can always find a way to sneak up behind the shooters?


Let me just say that I was very happy when I first heard that in Jopog manura 3,Shu Qi was going to replace Shin Eun Kyung as the lead role. Although I have nothing against Shin Eun Kyung, I feel that the character of a female gangster requires just more than having a scary face. I was very disappointed when I saw Jopog manura and Jopog manura 2. I expected something truly funny with tons of mega kick action, but it turned out to be just another cliché Korean gangster film. But Jopog manura 3 is totally different from it's predecessors, having the right mix of comedy,action,and melodrama.(although I think that this movie should change it's title, given that the movie itself is totally different from it't title.)

Jopog manura 3 revolves around Ah Ryoung(Qi Shu), who is framed of murdering a crime boss from a rival gang to her father's. When her father(a spectacular performance from Lung Ti who starred in the legendary Hong Kong film "A Better Tomorrow")tells her to evacuate Hong Kong until the heat dies down, she chooses to go to South Korea, a country where her unknown mother was born. A Korean mob boss, who is friendly with Ah Ryoung's father, orders his third in charge Ki Chul(played by Lee Bum Soo, star of "The City of Violence" and "Oh Brothers")to protect Ah Ryoung during her stay. What started as a mutual relationship between Ki Chul and Ah Ryoung slowly develops into passionate love.

If I say more, I would be adding spoilers so I'll stop right here. But let me just say again that Jopog Manura 3 was the best movie that I have seen in a long time.


I loved this film even though im not familiar with the first two. I had no idea of what was in store before watching this, except that the title itself projects a sense of violence. I love gangster movies and after seeing this i even loved it more. It's different than the average gangster genre given that it has quite a lot of comedy interplay with the story. The actors aren't familiar to me except Qi shu which portrayed the role in a hardcore tough yet so fine and sexy way.

The comedy was very funny at times see for yourself. I liked the car chase scene it's something new, fresh, comic and a very sensual idea(you'll understand when you see it). It's cool to see interesting movies once in a while and this one is certainly the one you can't miss. Truly entertaining, overall funny, cool action scenes and a bit of that comic romance. Watch it, its worthwhile.


"In December, Big Sister is arriving from Hong Kong."

Aryoung is sent away from her homeland of Hong Kong by her father . Her father is a powerful gang leader that is in the midst of a major power struggle. He is worried about the safety of Aryoung and thus gives her the choice to stay in another country until things settle down in Hong Kong. Aryoung picks South Korea, mainly because her mother is Korean and now lives somewhere in that country.

When Aryoung arrives at the Incheon airport, three Korean gang members are there waiting for her. The gangsters were assigned to protect Aryoung by their Korean boss. Unfortunately the three unwitting gangsters were not informed of Aryoung's background, nor are they aware that the person the would have take care of is a woman. Aryoung can't speak Korean and the gangsters can't speak Chinese. Thus an uncomfortable acquaintance period is endured until the gangsters hire a Chinese translator. The gangsters soon learn that Aryoung has quite a few more surprises behind her pretty appearance.

One of the funniest foreign films that I've seen so far and most probably, one of the best Korean films that I've seen but that really isn't something because I haven't seen a lot of Korean films, only Taegukgi comes to mind so this easily takes one of the top spots. Take note that I haven't seen the previous two installments so my review of this film is purely a stand alone and not in any way will it be judged and compared to the previous two films.

My Wife is a Gangster 3 is a movie that blended comedy and action really well. The comedy are courtesy of the three lovable gangster wannabes who were assigned to protect the Wife, portrayed by Shu Qi, but it turns out they were the ones that needed protection. The action mostly came from Shu Qi and if you put these characters together you get a hysterical laugh-out-loud fest that won't stop until it ends. Add to that the blossoming romance subplot involving lead gangster wannabe Ki-Chul and the Wife and you get an impressive K-flick that's worth the watch.


Before i geared up to watch this movie, I hadn't expected much (which perhaps fuelled my enjoyment even more) as other reviews on the internet promised bad fighting sequences and flat acting. I beg to differ, however. The korean lead brings with him a series of quirky expressions and is very likable, and Shu qi's stoic attitude makes his wild expressions stand out all the more.

Despite not knowing each other's mother tongue, it is altogether believable that their marriage would work out, given Shu qi's entourage's quirky mistranslations that turn anything they say into sweet nothings. (Think about it, they would never have the chance to argue!) I entirely recommend watching this, as it had me rolling around in laughter. The first 5 minutes or so may be a bit of a drag, though-however, it is well worth enduring.

My advice for anyone who has yet to watch it? Don't take it too seriously!


The first comment is just one opinion. Now I'm giving you another. Miramax didn't buy the rights to the movie series for nothing! Jopog manura 1 & 2 were excellent! I was very disappointed to find out that Eun-Kyung Shin was no longer in the lead role. To put Qi Shu as the lead "Americanized" the film. Qi Shu was good in "So Close" but in this role where she's filling the shoes of a very strong actress. She just doesn't cut it. In my opinion, she's not that great. When you have a winning formula why change it? The movie execs should have done everything they could to keep Eun-Kyung Shin in this movie. Sissors and all! If you can, pick up Jopog manura 1 and 2 to enjoy yourself!


From the get go i could tell that this movie was going to be like Hell Asylum. It's amateurish with bad acting and cheapy crappy effects. The story is kind of good but of course was never pushed in the right direction. The characters kept saying how creepy and spooky the place was and that it was an old abandoned asylum or something. Abandoned? The place didn't have a spec of dust and it looked quite modern. Bare yes but old and abandoned it wasn't. Whoever scouted for a location for this movie sucked.

I'll briefly give the story. It's about a successful photographer who combines art with bondage and S&M. He's a real sleaze bag and rents a place so he can work on his art with 3 female models and his female assistant but are also joined by a big hulking ug ug kinda guy who works for an estate agency or something and has to oversee this guy for insurance purposes (it's kind of hazy). But needless to say there's an evil ghost in this place.

I watched this while having a few beers and i'm sorry but Screaming Dead is in a word 'dead' and no way could you ever say that this film is so bad it's good! It's so bad it's bad! Apart from a potentially good story gone to waste and nice looking women there's not much good about this movie. There's only one gore effect in it too. I'm giving it an extremely generous 3/10 for reasonable but wasted story, nice looking girls and one good gore effect.


Certainly, if the movie carried a specifically designed tone to make the viewer's heads explode it would've been worse. Actually, halfway through, I was praying for such a tone. I've never fast-fowarded through a nude scene before this movie, but the dialog voided out the excitement from the nudity.

Misty Mundae is an attractive woman; however, it takes more than beauty to save this movie. It would take all the best doctors in the east to save this movie and, even then, I doubt it could be anything more than something to separate channel 357 from 359.

Well, that was what was bad about the movie. What follows is what was good about the movie:


A famous photographer wants to shoot photo shoots in an old asylum with three hot young girls. The company that owns the property insists that their representative be present. The representative (hero-boy) immediately and constantly antagonizes and confronts the photographer because of the harsh treatment of the girls. My question: Why would a famous photographer put up with such a macho hero-boy doing his best to ruin the shoots? This was the foremost unrealistic aspect of this movie for me.

But famous photographer continues putting up with hero-boys crap, and the movie plods on. Lots of boring talk with the photographer verbally abusing the girls and threatening to fire them if they don't do what he says. Yawn. Nothing much happens until the end, when an ugly ghost possesses the photographer and hero-boy saves the day for the girls.

Really one of the worst movies I've ever seen, and not one that is so bad it is good. This one is just a bore.


Arrogant and despicable sleazeball control freak fetish photographer Roger Neale (a nicely slimy portrayal by Joseph Farrell), his perky assistant Maura Holloway (the delightfully spunky Rachael Robbins), amiable, morally uptight lug Sam Rogan (likable Rob Monkiewicz), and three beautiful models -- sweet, naive Bridget (the always adorable Misty Mundae), vacuous Lauren (blonde looker Heidi Kristoffer), and meek Jennifer (fetching brunette C.J. DiMarsico) -- go to a rundown and abandoned old building for a photo shoot. Of course, said building turns out to be haunted by vicious and depraved sadist Rossiter (a deliciously hammy turn by Kevin G. Shinnick). While the premise certainly has promise, alas said promise is severely undermined by writer/director Brett Piper's lackluster execution: the sluggish pace crawls along for the first two thirds of the picture, there's no spooky atmosphere to speak of, the special effects are strictly so-so, and the drab and uneventful script gets bogged down in a dull surplus of insipid talk. Only when Rossiter gets revived in the last third and begins brutally torturing the ladies does this flick finally start cooking, but by then it's too little too late to alleviate the general tedium. The cast do their best with the blah material, both Jon Greathouse's moody score and M.A. Morales' polished cinematography are up to speed, and there's a decent smattering of yummy female nudity (Misty in particular as usual looks quite scrumptious in her birthday suit), but overall this movie is too poky and plodding. A merely passable time-waster.


Let me begin by stating that I loved Psyclops and Arachnia and viewed those before I watched this poor exercise in film-making. Piper used brilliant clay-mation effects in the two previously stated films but here, I'm certain it has a lot to do with Shock-o-Rama Cinema, none of the fun and creative effects are prevalent. He just uses the same old worn out CGI that everyone else and their dog employs.

Apparently Shock-o-Rama is an affiliate of Seduction Cinema, and judging by the catalog included in the DVD that I purchased, they specialize in making erotic lampoons of A-List movies; what with titles like Playmate of the Apes and The Erotic Time Machine. Therefore Shock-o-Rame places less emphasis on the SHOCK and more on the O.

Granted this isn't much of a horror movie as Piper wasn't allowed to showcase his genius like Edgewood Studios allows him to, but this isn't a terrible movie; believe me, I've seen worse.

VIOLENCE: $$$ (Plenty of violence and gore to sustain the viewership of horror hounds as Rob Monkiewicz packs a pistol and we get to see an exploding head, which was actually handled well).

NUDITY: $$$$$ (Seduction Cinema couldn't allow their fright film satellite to take it easy in the nudity department. Misty Mundae, who appears to be a favorite of Seduction Cinema, spends a great deal of the film nude. Another "actress" takes the patented horror film shower scene while she talks with an "artist." Her acting skills are laughable but she is really the only cast member who lacks talent).

STORY: $$$ (The plot is there but the dialogue leaves you wanting at times. There are moments where Piper makes strong statements on gender issues but his messages get lost in the poor production values and Shock-o-Rama's accent on skin. Although the plot of people entering a haunted house has mileage, Piper gives us a new twist with the deviant and sexually frustrated "artist" and his desire to take photos of the three models in submissive roles).

ACTING: $$ (Nothing special here although Misty Mundae isn't nearly as bad of a thespian as I was expecting. She could be a decent actress even without removing her clothes. Rob Monkiewicz, who has been in other Piper films, gives the best performance and the guy who played the twisted photographer wasn't bad but a tad too stiff. Rachael Robbins does an adequate job in her mother-hen role).


I happened to like the script. I liked the writing and thought when Rossiter appeared and his eventual demise was an idea that worked well and one I had never seen before, even in higher budget horror films. The actors did a good job, the house it was filmed in looked genuinely spooky.

Of course sex sells and there were plenty half naked girls in the movie. There wasn't too much of it though, and there wasn't lesbian scenes or anything like that (though it was suggested by one of the main characters). So depending upon your preference that could either be good or bad.

Low budget wise I think the special effects was more computer generated in nature. Lots of computer generated ghostly images and billowing smoke kind of stuff. Rossiter had some special effects work and there was some scenes where gory effects were used. I would give them a pat on the back for the effort. It was better than some of the other low budget horror movies I've seen recently. I do have one complaint and that was the fake blood. Fake blood should look real and not fake right? Well in this movie it's clearly FAKE blood.

Overall for a low budget film the script was well done in my opinion. I liked the writing in the fact it did a good job bringing out Neal's character and his penchant for dominating women. You really want to hate the guy. I would recommend this movie to anyone who wants to see half naked girls (that's clearly why they're there) and have that half-nakedness revolve around a horror movie plot. As long as your expectations are low...you won't be disappointed.


If you like bad, low budget, unintentionally funny films, seek no more. This is the movie for you.

It has nudity, some horror, and really bad acting. The special effects are embarrassing. For example, a nude woman receives a series of "cuts", and it looks like someone just squirted red paint on to her body. There is no cut of any kind. She's just being basted in tobasco sauce.

Yes, it's shlock. Shlocky shlock. Super shlocky shlock.

At best, you'll laugh. There were some scenes where I laughed out loud. Not because the film was funny, but because the film was so very bad.

At worst, you'll become bored and shut off the movie. There were a few times I was tempted to do so, but I waited out my boredom, and was rewarded with more terrible dialogue, needless nudity, ridiculous special effects, and filming mistakes. Hooray!

The film stars Misty Mundae. Having never heard of her before, I laughed when I saw her name in the credits. The moniker has "soft core porn star" written all over it. The bonus material to the DVD assures me she is a famous horror movie actress who has been in many magazine articles -- Fangoria, for example. And she has, they assure me, "star quality".

Well, no. She doesn't. Not really. But she is willing to take off all her clothes. She is sort of cute, I guess, if scrawny and small.

Rob Monkiewicz plays the male hero, Sam Rogan, and he's amazingly bad. He delivers is lines like he's delivering a pizza -- each sentence comes coated in Luke warm cheese, served in a cardboard box. More than once, his hamfisted lines made me giggle. He's supposed to play a muscle bound romantic, but comes across as a bouncer who occasionally "acts".

Now you know what you're in for -- bad, bad, bad, bad film. But so bad it can be entertaining. Get your friends together, get drunk, and maybe you'll enjoy the film. Watch for the scene where a crew member is accidentally filmed by the doorway. Laugh as the mike once again swings into the scene. Boggle at computer special effects that you would be embarrassed to use as a screen saver.

This, my friends, is a great, bad film.


This is an ultra low budget indie horror film, refreshingly old fashioned and well made for its kind. Some of the settings were atmospheric and the acting was pretty good (although the main villain is kind of stiff he's suitably despicable). I rather enjoyed the leisurely pacing, although it gets more frantic (and goofier) in the last fifteen minutes. The girls were cute and charming and capably acted. But the most unusual aspect of this film is that it's a feminist statement in disguise! It's all about how scum bag "artistes" manipulate gullible young women by holding the lure of fame and fortune over their empty little heads. I was pretty surprised to see this kind of social comment in a cheap indie horror movie --- although that didn't stop the director from showing enough young female skin to keep the fans happy!


The only good thing that I can think to say about this movie is at least it wasn't worse than 28 Days Later. Boy was that torture or what?! That being said, there now only remains an onslaught of negative opinion.

This movie reeks of an amateurism that only a group of silly teens would take interest in. It has your bizarre, ditsy, nude-babe material that's a must for any sleep-over (yawn). I mostly felt sorry for the film because you can see how hard the director is trying to make a good movie, but just misses the boat completely. This seems to be so prevalent nowadays that I have come up with a theory about it.

The target market for all new horror films is mindless teenagers. This is the audience the movie has been created for and the one that it is designed to attract. For an old man like me, we are out of the picture. Not even considered. Because why in the world would they want to go through the trouble of making a REAL horror film? One that involves great skill, attention to detail, and solid construction. Who wants to go through all that trouble? Nah, making a cheap and quick infantile flick and marketing it to a simple audience is much easier. That way old men like me are stuck continuing to gripe about how there aren't any serious horror films anymore.

Where have all the cowgirls gone (sigh)?


I saw this movie when it first came out, and just recently purchased it. It is a movie from the 80's that is just about fun and you don't have to worry about confronting any issues or tackling any controversial subjects. It is just a fun romp into a fantasy that we all probably had when we were in high school, to have some sort of "special power" that made us different from everyone else. I say if you just want to forget today's world just pop in this movie and relax for 1hr 38min!


If you're an 80's teen movie fan, this parody of Carrie is definitely worth a look. So what if Scott Baio can't act? It's a one gag picture, but it has its moments.


I believe I'm one of the few people who are huge fans of this movie. It's not a great movie but it excels in it's 1980's cheesy-ness. Forget John Hughes and St. Elmo's Fire, if you are looking for the quintessential teen movie, it's Zapped. Scott Baio gets hit on the head and gets telekenisis powers, Willie Ames is with him as always, Scatman Crothers gets high and rides a bike through a field, girls shirts rip off. I have devoted my life to make sure as many people see this movie as possible. And the song they play at the prom, "Got To Believe In Magic" by David Pomeranz. It's beautiful, I've used it in video projects and a play I directed. It's a horrible movie but it's not in the so bad it's good category. It's a movie I can watch repeatedly and enjoy even though it is pretty bad. Stay away from the sequel you will only get scorned.


It really brings me back to when I was growing up. The music, the acting it was all a lot of fun! Scott Baio was and still is a great actor. Appearing in Happy Days, Zapped and many more show, not to mention Charles in charge. I remember growing up, it was a part of my day. I guess I look apon those days with a fondness a more easy time. More about fun and less about serious issues. Everything today is Blood Gore and Violence, I liked the simpler films, the feel good movies once in a while. Zapped is exactly one of those films. Felice Schachter was another of those wholesome actresses that you loved to watch. Cute, Smart and funny. That real "girl next door" vibe. Willie Aames great to watch also, kinda like your buddy who knew how to get things done. I may not be a writer, but I know what I like. This is a very UNDERRATED film and deserves A lot more credit! Zapped RULES!


This highly under-rated film of the early 80's is not only a masterpiece but a film of immense cultural significance. One that really should be studied in any film course that is on offer at tertiary institutions around the world. It not only shows good versus evil it has such grand themes as science versus nature and a meditation on the religious right that is often over looked by the more carefree viewer.

These grand precepts joined with a killer soundtrack just reinforce this film as a piece of cinematic wizardry.

Furthermore the cast and the special effects contribute to these points and it is imperative that when one views this motion picture these underlying themes and points are taken on board to ensure a true appreciation of possibly the greatest film ever produced.

A must see!


This movie is a masterpiece of 1980's comedies. It has everything you want in an 80's film. Washed up actors like Scott Baio and Willie Aames (who are actually funny in the film) super hot Heather Thomas that can give a gay man a hard on, plenty of great 80's songs that you never heard of, a prom scene, a sports cliche, plenty of flopping breasts, and Scatman Crothers. This movie came out back when R rated films made money. The film was PG and then they added some boobies to make it rated R. Today, Solaris was given an R just for showing George Clooney's liberal behind (it was later revoked to PG-13). Back then, producers knew that kids wanted to see large, oval shaped tater tots and kids drinking and going bonkers. This movie would be great to show with such flawless films as Bachelor Party, Revenge of the Nerds, Porky's, and Three O'Clock High. Forget American Pie and Old School, watch the REAL films that started them all. WOW!


Nerdy high school science whiz Barney Springboro (a likable performance by Scott Baio) acquires telekinetic powers after being exposed to an experimental batch of premium grade marijuana. Barney uses his newfound abilities to create all kinds of comically wild havoc which includes helping his hip, wealthy best friend Payton (a winningly breezy turn by Willie Aames) hook up with snarky, yet desirable cheerleader Jane Mitchell (a delightfully bitchy portrayal by Heather Thomas). Director/co-writer Robert J. Rosenthal relates the amusingly silly story at a constant snappy pace, does a solid job of maintaining a light and breezy tone throughout, and tosses in an entertainingly nonstop barrage of admittedly dumb, but still funny lowbrow humor. An inspired send-up of "Star Trek" rates as one definite gut-busting highlight. The prom dance climax which cheerfully parodies the conclusion of "Carrie" likewise hits the sidesplitting spot. The lively and engaging acting from a game cast qualifies as a major plus: the adorable Felice Schachter as sweet school newspaper reporter geek Bernadette, Robert Mandan as pompous principal Walter J. Coolidge, Scatman Crothers as cranky baseball coach Dexter Jones, Greg Bradford as jerky college preppie Robert Wolcott, Sue Ane Langdon as ditsy English teacher Rose Burnhart, and Hilary Beane as sexy secretary Corinne Updike. Roger Bowen and Mews Small are hilarious as Barney's uptight and overbearing ultra-conservative parents. Eddie Deezen has a small role in one of his standard dweeb parts. The gorgeous Jewel Shepard pops up (and out) for a brief, but nice topless scene. Daniel Pearl's slick cinematography gives the picture an attractive polished look. The bouncy soundtrack, the endearingly chintzy (less than) special effects, and several vintage cornball early 80's musical montage sequences all further add to the infectiously goofy merriment. An absolute hoot.


This movie is one of the better goofy teen movies of the early 80's. The movie gets a bad review by people who don't see it for what it is. This is a movie that when nothing is on you will gladly waste 1-2 hours watching. Movie is clean and silly. Think of what you would do with the powers Scott Baio has in this movie. Soundtrack is typical early 80's cheese.


I'll admit that when I first saw this movie when I was about nine years old, I loved it. I couldn't stop laughing. However, when I recently saw this movie, I was laughing for another reason. The movie was so bad and so cheesy it was actually funny. Every scene in this movie was cheesy especially the baseball game and the ending scene which spoofed Carrie. I couldn't believe that I used to like this movie. If you do like goofy movies from the 80s, then I recommend this one. Just don't pay more than a dollar to rent it. However, if you want a good movie with solid acting, then do not rent this.


In this comic twist on "Carrie", low-key, nice-guy science whiz Barney Springboro (Scott Baio) has an accident in his lab one day, endowing him with powers of telekinesis which affable, scheming best pal Peyton (Willie Aames) is most anxious to exploit. Barney finds himself falling for pretty student reporter Bernadette (Felice Schachter) while Peyton spends the movie lusting after sexy but snooty Jane (Heather Thomas). It all comes to a head at a hysterical prom dance that earns the movie its R rating.

I think that key to the success of this movie for me is likability - both the characters and the movie itself. Even Peyton is not as obnoxious or smarmy as the character could have been. It's an engaging bit of 80's era nonsense, with decent special effects and several laugh-out-loud comedy moments. Examples include baseball coach Dexter (always lovable Scatman Crothers) having a marijuana-induced fantasy (including Albert Einstein!), Barney getting mooned by some dolts in a car and teaching them a lesson, and the utterly dumb but amusing "Exorcist" and 'Star Trek' send-ups. The script also goes so far as to have Barney recite Travis Bickles' immortal quote from "Taxi Driver"! Best of all is the climax; the film-makers don't fail to give their audience what they've been waiting for, as a number of attractive young ladies get stripped of their clothing.

The cast gives it a great effort right down the line: Marya Small and Roger Bowen as Barneys' uptight mom and bland dad, Robert Mandan as befuddled and love-starved principal Mr. Coolidge, and Sue Ane Langdon as Ms. Burnhart. Familiar faces in small roles include Merritt Butrick, Irwin Keyes, Eddie Deezen, LaWanda Page, and Corinne Bohrer.

As shameless, raunchy, and upbeat youth-oriented 80's comedies go, I would consider "Zapped!" a fine movie of this type. Those cheesy and sentimental ballads got to be a little much for me after a while, but they don't really erase the charm of this fun flick.

7/10


This film is is pure 80s crud. However it does have one obvious thing going for it. Attractive 80s female day-players running around half dressed! Not to mention the cut price Heather Lockleah ( Heather Thomas or possibly her double) in a state of undress- yummy! This also applies to the dead sexy Jewel Shepard !!!!!!!!!!! That is why I have awarded this masterpiece 2 out of 10, instead of 1! Apart from that is totally and utterly unwatchable. Scott Baio was and still is a third rate Steve Guttenburg. However I do like the UK video sleeve of this awful movie! But this was a long time ago. I can see why any actor involved in this rubbish is too ashamed to admit starring in it!


If there's anything worse than the teen flick, there's the aging teen flick.

I caught this in the 1980s on cable TV and it's representative of the Meatballs and Porky's generation of films.

What this film has in common with Star Wars and the X-Men is the fantasy of magical powers.

Even if some nudity will amuse you, there's not much about Zapped! worth seeing.

Who should see this film:

-- nobody

I'll give Zapped! a 3 out of 10.


The only reason to watch this God awful movie is for Heather Thomas. The story is stupid.The acting BAD.The special effects(if you want to call it that)are horrendous.Makes you wonder how this sort of drivel gets produced!


Whatever happened to Heather Thomas, anyway? She provides almost the sole reason to watch this lunk-headed teen comedy. Well, I take that back. There's also character actresses Sue Ane Langdon and Marya Small (both familiar to '70s tv viewers) and the young Felice Schachter seems very sweet as Scott Baio's soon-to-be girlfriend. But what happened to Heather? She dominates this lame movie even when she's not on screen. You would think producers would have been lining up to sign her. Was she dismissed as a beautiful bimbo? Unfair if she was. Thomas is a much better than that other more famous Heather, Locklear. Check out her performance if you don't believe me. Frankly, I think the wrong Heather from '80s tv became famous. "Zapped!" star Heather Thomas demonstrates a charisma and sexual allure the other Heather can only guess at. Not to mention acting ability. Damn that Aaron Spelling!


Some movies are just plain awful, and ZAPPED! has awful written all over it. Scott Baio stars as a high school kid who gains telekinetic powers after experiencing a scientific mishap. The movie is a trial to sit through and does not contain a single laugh. It is even worse than MODERN PROBLEMS and that movie was bad enough. I was never really a Scott Baio fan, although he did have a good role on TV's "Happy Days," but ZAPPED! is quite easily the worst teen movie I have ever seen in my whole life.

0 out of 5


How can a movie be so stupid, so unbelievably stupid, as to have Heather Thomas in a major role, then not give her more screen time??

Can you tell I'm a fan of hers?

I'm no fan of "Zapped!", though. Everyone's an idiot in this movie, and those who aren't end up looking stupid sooner or later.

You see, Baio plays a high school nerd who gets special telepathic powers thanks to this concoction he makes up in chem class. With these powers, he can either make the world a better place by ending war, disease and famine... or just use it to rig ball games, roulette wheels and pop open Heather's blouse.

Guess which road he takes?

Come on, it's an '80s movie, dude!

At least Baio and Aames worked well enough together here to star together in TV's "Charles in Charge" later on.

As far as everything else goes: bad special effects, bad script, bad judgment to use old fogies like Baio as high school students, VERY BAD under-use of Heather Thomas. And bad use of Felice Schachter.

Who's Felice Schachter?

Exactly.

Two stars. One for Heather, and an extra one just to give her moral support for this ordeal.

It's okay, Heather. we're here for you.


Once again, I'm sick and tired of seeing comments from people expecting a better storyline. This is a SOFTCORE PORN FLICK! Give me a list of softcore porn flicks with great writing! They don't exactly hire David Mamet to write these things! Besides, do you want (and this question is only for straight men or homosexual women) good writing in a film like this? What would be the use?

Of course, some people don't appreciate the simulated sex scenes. I think they look pretty realistic. All the guys and girls really look like they're getting into it. I personally find no enjoyment in watching a guy's hairy testicles bang against a woman's buttocks, which is why I most prefer this tasteful brand of porn. But if you like seeing the hardcore stuff, then hey that's your taste. The box for this movie wasn't labeled XXX. In fact, the one I rented was R-rated (despite the fact that the nudity and sex was pretty explicit and covered about 90-percent of the film's running time). So don't say you weren't warned.

I always love Surrender Cinema's movies, because they have some of the best-looking girls EVER! And I can honestly say, this movie has the most beautiful women out of all Surrender Cinema flicks. I didn't have to worry about having the urge to fast-forward to the next scene. Each woman stimulated me almost equally. Of course, the pinnacle of the film would have to be the sultry "Asian massage" between Jacqueline Lovell and that Asian chick. Hot, hot, hot!

If you ARE a fan of the Surrender Cinema flicks, you should have a great great great time with "Virtual Encounters"! Damn, I can't wait to see the sequel!!!

My score: 10 (out of 10)


One of Surrender's good, early efforts. This is from the same director as Femalien and the two films are pretty comparable in quality. There are several sex scenes all tied around the concept of the main character's trip to a "virtual reality" studio. If the technology shown really existed, the company's profits would exceed those of GM, IBM, Coca Cola and Exxon-Mobil combined. :)

A couple of real highlights in the film were the strip club scene and the wet lesbian/three way. But all of the scenes were good.

Given the low price and high quality of the video, this is an easy recommendation.


Okay, I'll admit that I had a pretty good idea of what to expect before I actually sat down to watch this flick. But this film didn't even pretend to have a plot. It was just sex scene after sex scene, which can get boring pretty fast. Now then, if you are just dying to see soft porn (with no storyline, just the sex), this is certainly a good choice, for it is plastered with wall-to-wall nudity and sexuality. But as for the story...what story? This is a movie that should be watched only with your brain turned off, much like the writers had their brains turned off when they scripted this disaster.


This is a very unpretentious, likeable movie.

I thought the entire cast including Brigitte Bardot did an excellent acting job. I was surprised Bardot had such a big role considering this was her first picture. No disappointment here that she's a brunette. As I remember she also ended her career as a brunette in the picture Don Juan.

It's a feel good story. It's about a lovable simpleton who goes back to elementary school. In the process he wins the hearts of virtually all the people in the small village. It's somewhat of a Forrest Gump tale but on a much smaller scale.


Although 'Le trou Normand' lives on as Brigitte Bardot's film-debut, I think this view an injustice to the great French actor Bourvil. It's him, in the principal role of Hyppolite, who greatly carries this rather enjoyable movie to its end.

Seventeen year old Brigitte plays a role she admittedly does not like: a not-too-sincere girl with a conceited state of mind. In spite of all that, the shape of things to come is clearly visible.


To sum things up: I loved this movie.

I had been waiting for it ever since it was announced, so of course I couldn't pass up the chance to see a press preview this morning. And, while there were some definite weaknesses (mostly in the quality of the animations), overall I was completely convinced. Naturally it did not coincide 100% with my own vision of Narnia visually, but emotionally it rang absolutely true, choking me up several times and really touching me. I walked out of the theatre with a warm, contented feeling - just like I feel every time I read C.S. Lewis' book!

The stand-out performance was definitely Tilda Swinton's as the White Witch, but I liked all actors/voices, from cute little Lucy (newcomer Georgie Henley) to majestic Aslan (Liam Neeson). I thought the children did a great job, considering their relative inexperience and the amount of blue screen work involved.

Tip: Stay seated through the actor credits - afterwards there's another small scene.


The audience at this afternoon's preview screening of The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe, at New York's AMC 25 theater in Times Square, broke out in spontaneous applause at least three or four times. It seems that director Andrew Adamson has brought a thaw to normally-jaded New Yorkers as well as to the 100-year winter of Narnia. The movie pulls the viewer into the story right from the opening scenes of war-ravaged England, where siblings Lucy, Susan, Peter and Edmund (wonderful performances by all) are sent from their homes to the relative safety of 'the professor's' country estate where, during a game of hide-and-go-seek, young Lucy hides in the wardrobe only to discover the passage to the land of Narnia. From this point, the multi-layered story of betrayal, courage, sacrifice, redemption and hope unfolds into a briskly paced 2 hour and ten minute adventure that leaves the viewer emotionally charged and thoroughly entertained.

The musical score is appropriately stirring and moody. The computer generated creatures are sophisticated to the point where the technology disappears and you begin to accept the performance, and not the special effect! This brings us to Aslan - if the talking lion didn't work, the movie would fold in on itself and go away. Aslan works,however, and works very well. Voiced by Liam Neeson, Alsan is both believable as a 'literal' lion and as Aslan, talking lion, King of Narnia. Aslan's face is expressive and noble, and Neeson's voice acting has strength and dignity.

This film succeeds on so many levels, it would be possible to discuss it in many different veins: the direction, the story's surface-level themes, the theological possibilities, the drama, the fantasy, the adventure.... Yes - it's an action film, a dramatic film, a fantasy, a somewhat-dark (yet hopeful) fairy-tale. It has humorous moments and frightening moments, like most truly great 'family' films always seem to have.

The bottom line is, this is a film that will leave you the better for having seen it. There's much to reflect on and much to simply enjoy - there's certainly enough to keep you thinking for a while, and that's always a good thing. Aslan, indeed, is on the move!


What a fabulous movie! I just saw a screening of it (with a bunch of other actors and writers) and the whole place burst into applause at the end.

Tilda Swinton is amazing as the White Witch. Her cold, evil gaze could freeze anyone.

I loved the kids - especially the little Georgie Henley, who played Lucy. Liam Neeson as the voice of Aslan was suitably majestic and comforting and grand.

It was beautifully filmed, and I felt Narnia was perfectly realized.

Looking forward to the movies that will follow.


I saw this film on November 30th in Indianapolis. I am one of the judges for the Heartland Film Festival that screens films for their Truly Moving Picture Award. A Truly Moving Picture "explores the human journey by artistically expressing hope and respect for the positive values of life." Heartland gave that award to this film.

Four young children enter the timeless world of Narnia through the door of a wardrobe piece of furniture while playing hide-and-seek. And what a world it is. There are talking animals, dwarfs, giants, beasts, centaurs, and indescribable half-human combinations. And, in this world of Narnia there is a titanic struggle between the White Witch and her evil army and the good lion Aslan and his noble army.

Although it doesn't seem possible, you can suspend disbelief and become engaged in the story because the artistry and technology are so outstanding. The art direction, special effects, cinematography, editing and sound will most likely and should be nominated for Academy Awards. The lion Aslan dominates your attention in every scene he appears in, and as the story unfolds, he becomes as human-like as any of the four children.

The four children seem normal enough with their constant teasing and fighting among themselves, but when events truly matter, they come together and exemplify the highest standards of sacrifice, courage, fidelity and heroism. Both children and adults will find inspiration and role models in these four children.

The lion Aslan is a mystical and almost biblical hero. There are many parallels between Aslan and Christianity, and you can watch this film anywhere in the religious-secular spectrum you care to. I suspect that over many years the other six books that make up The Chronicles of Narnia will be made into movies and they will have the same type of financial and artistic success as The Lord of the Rings film trilogy had. That is high praise indeed.

FYI  There is a Truly Moving Pictures web site where there is a listing of past Truly Moving Picture Award winners that are now either at the theater or available on video.


"The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe" is a film with a lot to live up to. Not just it's (considerable) legacy, but the many recent fantasy films as well. The one place where there are no worries is the story. Four children living in London during WW2 are sent away as refugees to live in the country. The place they are staying is the home of an elderly professor. The youngest soon discovers a magical wardrobe which leads into another world. All of this is brilliant set-up for an adventure. It works much better than if they had simply entered a wardrobe in their own home. Out of many difficulties related to production, one of the largest lay in the script. Ann Peacock did a fine job adapting a film which is not particularly suited to the cinema. The director, Andrew Adamson is a bit unsteady with his first live-action feature. At times, a real spark is evident, but it is sometimes filmed too much like animation. One of the most important parts is the score. Harry Gregson-Williams does do a fine job, but has not created a score that is quite good enough to work separate from the film. The few vocals that are included work nicely as well.

The cast is nearly perfect. The expression of wonder and awe on the face of Georgie Henley (Lucy) seems to be completely real. She is a joy to watch, and appears to truly love playing her role. Skandar Keynes (Edmund) plays his character with all appropriate mean-spiritedness and greedy attitude. William Moseley and Anna Popplewell (Peter and Susan) are good as well, but not as complicated or important characters as the two youngest. Tilda Swinton (Jadis - The White Witch) has a shockingly sharp stare, which she uses greatly to her advantage. Her appearance and demeanor are excellently suited to her role. James McAvoy (Tumnus) is one of the stand-out supporting roles, and fits seamlessly into his animated lower half. Of course, most important of all is the character of Aslan, voiced by Liam Neeson. A perfect choice for the role, Neeson gives a sense of great age and dignity.

Even though I missed the opening night due to bad Canadian weather, the crowd retained that grand spirit of being one of the first to see a film. "The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe" has left a big impression for fantasy films to follow, and will likely be followed by six more motion pictures from The Chronicles of Narnia.

9.1 out of 10