You must not be distracted by his coming on strong (since men come on strong when they're serious about and when they're just looking for sex), so you must determine which one it is. And the only way to figure it out is to test, test and test. Many women are used by men because they are afraid of admitting what their gut tells them is real, or because they are afraid of testing in case it is "manipulative." Let me assure you that deceiving him and disrespecting his time, work and effort is only manipulative if you're doing it to abuse him. Whether you're doing it to test if he'll agree to something, it's not manipulative.