It is possible to get a codependent relationship back on track, but it requires a lot of hard work and time. The first step to changing codependent behavior is understanding it. The codependent spouse and the rest of the family need to understand problematic behaviors and start identifying them. Often, the spouses seek help from a trained counselor or therapist to help dig into the behaviors and codependent tendencies. Some other steps to help reduce codependency include: Taking small steps toward independence. The codependent spouse should seek out activities outside of the relationship. Making new friends, joining a local club or activity, or picking up a hobby are all ways that the codependent spouse can gain separation from the relationship and find their individuality. Say no. It’s okay to say “no,” but codependent spouses have a very hard time saying no to their partners. Before agreeing to do something, the codependent spouse should take a moment to evaluate if they want to do what their spouse asks. Find a support system. Whether one-on-one therapy, group therapy, or a supportive group of friends and family, the codependent spouse needs a support system as they take steps to correct codependent tendencies. Look inward. Codependent spouses are often very critical of themselves and feel they could always do more for their partner. Breaking the cycle requires the codependent spouse to focus on themselves and their needs. When that spouse starts to worry about their partner or friend, they need to actively turn that focus inward and evaluate their own needs. These things take time to master. Throughout the process, the codependent spouse must practice speaking kindly to himself/herself and avoid self-criticism.