What you are feeling is called Spiritual Disconnection.  You simply do not know what you need to know about yourself and because of that Soul, Ego and Body are not in alignment – worse they do not even know one another intimately with one mind.  Spiritual Disconnection occurs when we are not Self Aware.  It begins as uninspired, shifts to self-sabotage, and renders us incapable of asking for or receiving the help we need. Out of fear, all of that leads to anger becoming depression and worry becoming anxiety.
You are not alone.  You've got this and we've got you.