It seems as though your ten year old daughter is more mature than her parents. She is absolutely right to stop your husband from using abusive language to you. You should have kept her out of the scene, when you were arguing. At least now, avoid acrimonious scenes when the child is around. It is also possible for you both to go to a marriage counsellor for advice on how to manage your relationship. When the family is peaceful and harmonious, the girl will definitely be less anxious. Please take the message that the girl is giving you both: Lets have peace and warmth in my home!