If you are dealing with an unacceptable situation concerning the former wife where you believe that a face to face sit down will not resolve the problems with her and her barrage of perceived inappropriate messages to you and your boyfriend, I suggest that you consult with a family law attorney as to the possibility of filing a petition for a restraining order against her in return prohibiting the conduct as to you that she has recently displayed.It is best that you have legal representation concerning the situation that you are facing as opposed to you representing yourself.In this country, all people have the right to be left alone from unwanted and unacceptable social behavior. The longer the behavior of the former wife continues, the greater the chances are that it will become worse as to you.