They frequently believe that they are not good enough for this sort of person to adore them. As the anxious person expresses a desire for deeper intimacy or commitment, the avoidant will retreat and feel nervous that they are being smothered or forced into something they don't want in the relationship. In reality, an avoidant is just as capable of loving and trusting another person as any other type of partner, but because their fear of rejection is so strong, they need some assurance that what they feel for someone is wanted and accepted before they are willing to take the risk and express their feelings. Avoidant partners tend to come from families where emotional connection was not given importance. They may also have experienced early trauma such as physical abuse or sexual exploitation that has left them with intense fears relating to these subjects. These fears often cause them to withdraw from relationships when they perceive that they are not going to be accepted or loved back. It is important for avoidants to learn how to communicate their needs and desires in a healthy way so that they can get the love and affection they crave. It is also helpful if they can learn to trust others so that they aren't always afraid that someone will reject them. With time and effort, they can work through their issues with anxiety and depression so that they are able to focus on the positive aspects of life instead of being consumed by worry and fear.