Cancer impacts the entire family. Parents may feel they are protecting their children by hiding a cancer diagnosis. But cancer is not something you can easily hide, nor should you. Keeping such a secret can cause additional strain on you and your family at a time when you need to focus on healing.
Talking with your children about your illness may be one of the most difficult things you've ever had to do. However, avoiding the subject does not prevent children from learning about it another way. Although they may not show it, children of any age can usually sense when something is wrong. Like adults, children can pick up on tension and stress and are likely to notice a change in the family routine.
If they are not told the truth about a parent’s illness, children may become scared and anxious. They may use their imagination to explain the changes around them. Children are also likely to eavesdrop on conversations or receive misleading information from sources like television or the internet. Without the correct information, children may feel as if they are to blame or they are being punished.
Talking with your children allows you to control the presentation of information so you can create an accurate picture for them. Your child will learn that you are there for support and they can count on you to be honest with them. Most of all, they will learn about how families can pull together during difficult times and overcome challenges.