I am so sorry for your situation. What you have to check is the procedural requirements as to service of pleadings (the petiton and answer ) in a matrimonial action.  generally speaking courts require personal service  (i.e., handed to you) rather than subsituted service (nailed and mailed, etc.).  But serving by e-mail is not generally allowed.  That is why he wants you sign a waiver.  So sign nothing.  And bring everything to your attorney to discuss strategy.  Good luck.