Early childhood experiences do leave a significant impact on life. However, if your current circumstances are different, it becomes easier to resolve the pain from earlier times and focus on the here and now. As you mention that your relationship with your father is different now, try and focus on the positive changes and this will result in positive emotions. However, there seems to be a lot of pain that you are holding on to. One way to reduce the impact of that would be to have an honest chat with your father and tell him how you felt through your growing up years. In case you can't talk to him, write him a letter. Often just expressing yourself allows you to rid yourself of pent up emotions. Finally try and maximize on other relationships in your life and make the most of present circumstances. With all these changes memories will cease to bother you.