“..change occurs when one becomes what he is, not when he tries to become what he is not. Change does not take place through a coercive attempt by the individual or by another person to change him, but it does take place if one takes the time and effort to be what he is—to be fully invested in his current positions… The Gestalt [coach]… believes change does not take place by “trying,” coercion, or persuasion, or by insight, interpretation, or any other such means. Rather, change can occur when the patient abandons, at least for the moment, what he would like to become and attempts to be what he is. The premise is that one must stand in one place in order to have firm footing to move and that it is difficult or impossible to move without that footing.”
This quote, from Arnold R. Beisser’s article “Paradoxical Theory of Change” is the essence of Gestalt coach’s stance on creating change: Awareness, more than anything, creates change and movement. You cannot create, or maintain a change by coercion or will solely.
As Kierkegaard says, “be with what is, so what is possible, can become”. We, at the Gestalt Center for Coaching, teach how to become awareness agents using Paradoxical Theory of Change, in order to help clients be fully with what is, so their possibilities will manifest themselves.