When it comes to divorce, there is no one-size-fits-all answer. Each couple's situation is unique, and therefore the decision of who should file for divorce first depends on many factors. However, there are some general advantages and disadvantages to consider when making this decision.
If you are the one who files for divorce first, you may have more control over the process. This can be especially beneficial if you want to avoid a lengthy and costly court battle. You can also set the tone for negotiations by being the first to present your proposed settlement terms. On the downside, filing for divorce first can make you look like the aggressor, which could damage your chances of receiving a favorable outcome in court. It can also put a strain on your relationship with your spouse if they were not expecting you to file.
If your spouse files for divorce first, they will likely be seen as the victim by the court. This could work in their favor if custody of children is an issue, or if they are seeking a larger share of assets in the divorce settlement. However, being seen as the victim can also backfire; judges may view your spouse as someone who is not capable of adequately taking care of themselves post-divorce, which could lead to them awarding less spousal support or granting sole custody of children to their ex.