The short answer is no, it’s not a great idea to mention an ex on a first date. It just sends the wrong message and distracts from what really matters on a first date — getting to know each other. “The goal of a first date is to figure out if you like the other person,” Jodi said. “Save heavy, messy topics for much later in the relationship once you have a foundation of understanding to have tough discussions.” OK, ideally, it’s best to bring this up at the end of the first date. As you’re saying goodbye, your job is to establish that the date was fun and that you want to get in touch to plan a second date. This is your moment to set expectations (as in, who is texting or calling and when) and keep your romantic momentum moving forward. Jodi encourages daters to be clear and not play mind games if they want to build a strong relationship. That means following up as soon as possible. You have to strike while the iron is hot because following the old-school three-day rule these days may mean your crush is always swiping on someone else by the time you circle back.