Dealing with the ex who continues invading into your current reality is one thing, but dealing with them is another. They are your problems to deal with, and you are free to manage them in any way you see fit. When your partner's ex shows up in your life, though, it may be a far more difficult scenario since you are not in charge. You can't fire them or quit seeing them - they are part of your partner now. Exes come in many forms. There are those who remain close friends with their former partner, others who may only speak once every few months, and still others who try to ruin their former partner's new life by spreading lies about them or trying to get them to return to the old relationship. No matter how strong your feelings for your partner or how much they mean to you, keep in mind that they have a history with this person and it's normal to feel some level of concern or jealousy when they start dating again. If you think your ex might be causing you or your partner pain, take action by reaching out to them first before you talk about them with others. It's important to let them know that you're done with them hurting you both and that you want to move on with your lives. Sometimes just knowing that someone is listening can be enough to make a difference! Finally, if you feel like you or your partner's ex is going through a very hard time and could use some support, offer what you can.