The dialogue is the core technique of the Imago therapeutic approach, in which partners ideally learn to avoid hurtful words and statements, create a safe environment for sharing, and establish a means of interacting in which each partner has equal space and power.
In the dialogue, partners take turns as the “sender,” or the one sharing their thoughts, and the “receiver,” who takes in those words. A key step for the receiver is “mirroring,” or paraphrasing what their partner has just said, nonjudgmentally and without a response or rebuttal (“What I’m hearing you say is…”). (This is a common element of couples therapy in general.) The receiver next will be asked to validate their partner’s statements, letting the other know what they understand and asking for clarification on what they don’t, and, importantly, acknowledging their understanding of why the sender’s position makes sense, even if they do not personally agree with it. Finally, the receiver should display empathy by stating what they imagine the other is feeling as they express their take on their experience in the relationship, and showing their appreciation for it. Couples may work on the dialogue process until it becomes familiar and they can do it on their own outside of therapy sessions when facing conflicts.