Losing someone close to you is one of the hardest things a person can go through, particularly if that person has taken their own life. Remember that it is not your fault. This was an incredibly personal decision for your friend. The thoughts that you are having about ‘why’ are normal to have when trying to understand loss. In order to work through this difficult time, surround yourself with a support system, consider reaching out for professional help if you feel you need it, and remember to take care of yourself even when it feels hard.