As parents, we frequently say things without thinking. We bring out our child's flaws in order to persuade them to change; we speak in haste and without much thought. The goal is to stimulate the kid, but teenagers just internalize the criticism, leading to a negative self-image and low self-esteem. It's hard to praise someone when you're trying to get them to see their faults. But if you want your teenager to feel good about themselves, then they need to know that they're worthy even though they make mistakes. The first thing that you should understand is that motivation doesn't necessarily mean giving your teenager what they want. If you give in all the time, then you'll never get them to do anything with any consistency. Instead, be sure to also include them in decisions about how you handle situations. This shows them that you respect their opinions and that you trust them to make good choices. Finally, remember that you can't force your teenager to be motivated. But if you provide them with positive role models and let them know that you believe in them, then they'll be more likely to try harder.