linda fiorentino disappeared off the radar after a deservedly heralded turn in the cable pic the last seduction , and her being cast as dogma 's lead is nothing short of inexplicable .
she 's still in fine form
as bethany , an abortion clinic worker who 's lost her faith .
one night , a visitor from heaven makes a fiery entrance in bethany 's bedroom .
he is metatron ( alan rickman ) , the voice of god , and he needs her help : she must stop two fallen angels from entering a new jersey church - the fate of the universe depends on it .
god would do it him / herself , but he /
she is . . .
missing , having taken up human form somewhere on earth never to be heard from again .
bethany is joined on her road trip to the garden state by the " prophets " jay ( jason mewes ) and silent bob ( kevin smith , doing double - duty ) , the slacker minstrels who have appeared in all of smith 's films thus far .
at some point , rock drops naked out of the sky as rufus , the undocumented ( and very black ) " thirteenth apostle " , and offers his assistance , as does divine stripper serendipity ( salma hayek ) .
it 's a wild ride .
they 're in pursuit of loki and bartleby ( damon and affleck , respectively - this is probably the sharpest either has ever been ) , who were banished from heaven to wisconsin and have discovered a dogmatic loophole that will enable their return .
loki decides to wreak havoc along the way with the knowledge that his sins will be absolved at the pearly gates .
at one point , he terrorizes a boardroom full of suits with an angry combination of words and bullets .
it 's a nasty , guiltily enjoyable little scene that asks , " how corrupt are you ? " .
wings of desire
this ai n't .
since debuting with clerks , smith has grown as a director , particularly in terms of working with actors .
( chris rock is this film 's only weak link - between jokes , he 's wooden . )
his no - frills visual style has n't changed much over the years , though ( dogma 's widescreen compositions at least have blockbuster affectations ) , nor has his writing - his characters still sit around delivering one caustic , hilarious speech after another .
dogma chips away at big religious issues - namely , the hypocrisy that accompanies any organized system of beliefs - eloquently and articulately , but a few of the monologues sound too much like blatant exposition .
as well , the verbal introduction of each new person seems to take forever .
any movie with this much weighty talk would have a hard time maintaining momentum ( hurlyburly , anyone ? ) , and eventually dogma 's pacing goes slack .
a long diatribe from bartleby late in the game , in which he laments the destiny of celestial beings , comes at a point when we 've heard enough .
because his change of heart ( bartleby is initially the good cop to loki 's bad ) drives the climax , said rant is given a great deal of screen time .
sure , affleck deserved a big moment ( damon steals their scenes together prior ) , but it ultimately makes the film and us feel bloated .
like tarantino , smith was a video - age sponge who became a sample - mad indie filmmaker .
dogma pays welcome homage to an eclectic batch of movies , including indiana jones and the last crusade , with silent bob doing his best harrison ford , and weird science - a shit demon attacks our heroes !
smith also has a kitchen sink brand of humour : his dexterous maneuvering between the satirical ( a cardinal played by george carlin attempts to mount a publicity campaign with the slogan " catholicism
wow ! " )
and the scatalogical ensures that no lover of comedy will leave
dogma feeling malnourished .
i bust
( ed ? )
a gut on several occasions .
proceedings also get off on the right foot with the opening with
the funniest disclaimer ever .
it 's a disclaimer unlikely to put protestors at ease , for to read it , one actually has to see dogma .
the prerelease ballyhoo is in the tradition of the last temptation of christ 's , martin scorsese 's 1988 adaptation of nikos kazantzakis ' controversial novel , in that it is not directly linked to the picture 's content but to rumours and heresy .
there 's a famous anecdote about fletch director michael ritchie inviting picketers of the last temptation of christ into a screening on his dime , just so they could know for certain what they were rallying against .
( not one of them had watched it . )
every single person refused .
smith and scorsese have a lot in common , and so do the two films in question , because both smith 's bethany and scorsese 's jesus are hollow shells without their faith .
in fact , dogma 's denouement ( which follows a thrilling showdown that 's worth the wait ) is a catholic love - in , a veritable recruitment poster .
( i felt sentimental about a religion i do n't belong to .
now that 's powerful filmmaking . )
smith is nothing if not sincere about his own devotion to god , and that spirituality shines through
.
it 's enough to make me forgive dogma for its editorial sins .
my religion is movies .
when the catholic league beats on dogma for imaginary crimes against a doctrine , in a roundabout way they 're attacking what i live for : freedom of expression through celluloid .
i therefore feel that , although i 'm no bible - thumper , i 'm at least as qualified to criticize dogma as william donohue and his followers .
pays welcome homage no lover of comedy will leave dogma feeling malnourished the funniest disclaimer ever in fine form that spirituality shines through get off on the right foot