Date: 2004-02-12
To: Much Ado
Miles today: 0.0

Tears were welling up inside my mother's eyes.   "So, is that a no?" She lifts a hand to her face to wipe away some of the dampness.   This was really no surprise to me.    Just an hour ago, she had been crying because Josh Groban was singing on TV.    Last week she cried when Beyonce did the National Anthem during the Super Bowl.    She cried in Star Wars when the Death Star blew up. That poor Empire.   And it wasn't the fact that I was asking her to send in my check once a month for my credit card that made her upset. It was because I told her I needed someone to do that for me "while I was on the trail."   I had mentioned "the trail."   When I had first brought up the idea of hiking the Appalachian Trail, my mother didn't seem bothered. Come to find out, it was because she thought I "would have given up on this stupid idea by now."    When she didn't know what to get me for Christmas, I suggested trail equipment. I ended up with a 2004 Appalachian Trail calender.    (Actually, I did also get a watch/compass, but I have a feeling that was my dad's doing. And this is a perfect place to mention the Leki Titanium Trekking Poles that my brother got me for Christmas. Sweet! I thought my mother was going to grab them out of my hands and skewer my brother.)    So I decided to talk to her about it today. She told me that she was concerned about me going out there all alone. Of course I told her that there were over 60 people starting on the same day as me, but in her mind I'll be in the cold, dark woods all by myself, having to face "all the things that go on out there."   All the things that go on out there? What, you mean like camping? Walking? Stubbing my toe? I'm still not really sure what she meant by "all the things that go on out there." Nor did I understand when I tried leaving the room and she said, "What, you can't wait to get back on the computer and talk to your friends that are in the woods?"   But my favorite part was, "Better you get this out of your system now than when you're married with kids and you still want to do this crap."   At last. A glimmer of acceptance.    But this is really an unfair portrayal of my mother. She really is one of the sweetest women alive. And I know she's just really REALLY worried about me going on this adventure that she doesn't understand. As is my grandfather, who "just can't seem to get it out of his head." And my girlfriend, who thinks I'm obsessed with this trail thing, which happened to lead to a less-than-pretty fight earlier today.   But my mother went out shopping and actually came home with a water filter as a gift for me. I don't know if it's a keeper yet, but it was a huge step for her to actually buy me something I can use on the trail.    And my grandfather I'll see on Sunday for his 78th birthday. I'm pretty sure he'll start to feel better once my mother does, which is sure to happen after a few phone calls from the trail.   Any my girlfriend, well, Valentine's Day is coming up. The perfect holiday to resolve a conflict with your significant other. She'll probably be hoping for flowers, or chocolates, or a romantic dinner for two.   Me? I'm hoping for a pot cozy.