Date: 2015-08-24
From: Millinocket, ME

To: Indianapolis, IN
Miles today: 0.0

After continued support from readers after the conclusion of my AT hike, I decided to include another entry since my journey didn't officially conclude until today when, at just before 3:00pm, I stepped off the plane and into the waiting arms of my twin brother, Ryan. The support and congratulations began rolling in as soon as my last entry was posted a couple days ago. Again, I can't thank you all enough though I wish I could - more than you know.Saturday afternoon was spent hanging out with Yogi, Steam, and Rabbit as we lounged around, journaled, read, and enjoyed each others company. After a couple hours of feeling like lumps on a log, we decided to at least retire to a small park across the street from the hostel where we'd sit on the benches and grass, continuing to do the same stuff, but under the warmth of the sun. Wilson eventually appeared and he, Rabbit, and I would grab a quick lunch together, talking about our trail experience and future plans, while the girls remained in the park. A few hours later we'd return to the place of the previous night's dinner, the Scootic In, along with Yoohoo, a section hiker, Caption, and a flip-flopper who's name has escaped me. We enjoyed a great dinner while talking about the finishing of our thru-hikes and section hikes, jokes and laughter in abundance.After dinner we went across the street to the Blue Ox Saloon where we joined the likes of Doc, Forward, Clank, and Magellan who were fresh off the completion of their own thru-hikes and section hikes earlier in the day. In the low-lit interior reaking of small town Maine charm, our gang would slowly let loose and enjoy as the speed of the alcohol consumed was second to only that of our less than impressive pool shots. The hours would roll by, the clocks eventually switching from PM to AM, as we continued on alongside the ever increasing numbers of locals. Even with the thought of an early rise to begin what would be our long days of returning home, it did little to dampen our last good evening together. We'd all eventually wobble the few hundred feet needed to reach the hostel and enjoy a deep, though much-too-short few hours of sleep.Up at 7:00am, 2 hours before our shuttle, Yogi and Steam would join Rabbit and I for another round of breakfast at the AT Hiker's Cafe. Having spent the previous morning enjoying heavier portions of what they had to offer, as well as signing our names on a ceiling tile, a thru-hiker tradition, we'd instead focus more on drinking coffee, water, and eating as a way to fuel ourselves for the day ahead. Yoohoo and his parents were also there and we'd enjoy their company for the last time before they eventually hit the road in order for Yoohoo to catch his flight back to Miami. A final "Ewweee/Yoohooo" call filled the empty morning street outside the cafe as they drove off, but not before Yoohoo tossing me a Coke before they did. We then returned to the hostel where we'd use the remainder of our time packing our gear for the last time. I was unable to break my battered trekking poles down and wouldn't be able to conveniently bring them along, therefore making the decision to leave them behind. Although they were beaten and 1 even part broken, 2,189.2 miles of daily use really makes an AT hiker attached to their gear. After failed attempts to break them down with the help of Rabbit, I would leave them standing along a few other forgotten poles by a garage door. I felt bad, but had to keep in mind they were simply tools - tools that had performed their job admirably.Loading into a large van that would take us to nearby Medway, ME, Yogi, Steam, Rabbit, Wilson, Clank, Magellan, and I sat quietly as we came to terms with the fact that we were leaving the woods and the simplicity of the life we'd known as hikers for the previous 10 days, a month, or 5 months. We were soon deposited at a gas station where tickets were purchased for our first bus which would take us into Bangor, ME (geeze, Bub, I hardly know her.) Wilson sat alone near the center of the bus, Rabbit and Steam sat together near the rear of the bus, Clank and Magellan in front of them, and Yogi and myself nearby. The first leg of the trip, at just over an hour long, was spent by each group enjoying their own conversations. Yogi and I delved into the likes of the evening before, experiences from our own journey's in the woods, and topics unrelated to the trail. Needless to say the bus ride passed in a blur and we soon found ourselves switching busses in Bangor. It was during this point that Wilson parted ways, though unbeknownst to us. My apologies if you read this Wilson - we had no idea you weren't continuing on. With plans to continue our chat, we soon found out we were unable to as the entire bus only had single seats remaining. We all spread out randomly throughout the bus, but Yogi and I remained close enough to enjoy a few comments and laughs in an otherwise bummer of a ride due to the fact that my iPod refused to work, the movie on the bus didn't actually begin until the final half hour of the ride, and we'd be delayed by traffic as we neared Portland.After a layover at the Portland Amtrak station, the point at which both Clank and Magellan (2 class acts, for sure) would head off in their own direction. A quick exchange of farewells and well-wishes, they were off and our group was down to 4. We were soon on an Amtrak to Boston that would take a few hours. We'd spend the time in a 4-seater, continuing getting to know one another in regards to our own and off the trail selves. Yogi would share a nice selection of her photography with me and I had to say I was impressed. The girl is about as well rounded, talented, and genuine that a person can be. The train rolled into Boston around 5:30pm where we planned to meet up with 2 of Steam's local friends for dinner during the layover. We walked along the loud, busy streets as we made our way to meet her friends and enjoy dinner at Regina's Pizzeria. Two ladies crossing the street nearly had a car back into them (though I think they were crossing during the infamous red hand) and showered the members of the car with a fury of words you'd expect from a Boston native. It was clear we were in Boston and Tom Brady still isn't starting.We reached Regina's, a cozy pizzeria (if not for the never ending loudness, pace, and brutal style of the waitresses) in an even cozier block of central Boston (if not for the never ending loudness, pace, and brutal style of massholes in the streets.) The pizzza was solid, the beer was cold, and even the horse racing on TV was a treat. However, I found myself in a funk as I sat watching the group, knowing we'd soon be splitting up as well. My original plan was to remain in Boston overnight, flying out early in the morning, while Yogi, Stream, and Rabbit continued on to Philadelphia where it'd be Rabbit's turn to break off as the girls continued to their lives in Virginia. A melancholy feeling came over me as I realized the day had consisted of saying goodbye to those I'd considered my best friends over these past few months. The same could be said regarding Yogi and Stream, even with having known them for only ~48 hours. I treated the table to the meal, perhaps hoping some form of kindness would cause time to slow, if not stop altogether.When I noticed that it in fact seemed to cause quite the opposite to happen, I decided to be random and change my plans in order to prolong my journey just a little bit longer. I switched my flight from Boston to Philadelphia, purchased another Amtrak ticket, and joined Yogi, Steam, and Rabbit on the 6-hour overnight leg to Philadelphia. We sardined ourselves into another 4-seater and would spend the next ~6 hours falling in and out of sleep amidst the many stops and voices of passengers joining and exiting the train. In a human mass resembling that of a pretzel, we twisted and turned our ways around one another in an attempt to find comfort. Rabbit, without a doubt, succeeded when, at 1 point, he took up the better parts of 3 of the 4 seats, sprawling his arms and legs over Yogi and Stream in the process.I, on the other hand, remained awake for most of the trip, silently thinking about the approaching end of my journey as well as the company I had the pleasure of sharing over the past coupledays. With Rabbit and Stream sleeping side by side just across from me, and Yogi sleeping quietly on my shoulder and an arm intertwined in mine, I knew then how far I'd truly come since beginning this hike close to 5 months ago. The distance I've come isn't something that can be measured in miles hiked or mountains summited, but instead by the human relationships formed. Any thru-hiker will tell you that relationships on the trail are fickle at best, and moments together should be enjoyed and not taken for granted. Would I have thought the last hiker I'd be parting ways with, soon after reaching Philadelphia, would be Rabbit? No. Would I have thought a friendship and closeness would've been formed as quickly and effortlessly, as with Yogi as she hugged me upon reaching my destination in the early morning hours? Not a chance. I began the trail ~5 months ago raw and unsure of myself as both a hiker and person. I left it feeling confident and sure in more ways than I could've hoped.Every mile of the trail is like that of every moment in reality: a chance to do or do not. As you hike you come across countless varieties of things to see, do, or experience. Want to stay at a popular hostel? Want to blue blaze to see a waterfall off trail? Want to head out of your way to top a summit not on trail? Want to return a hello to a kind voice on your last night on the trail? The opportunities for you to seize some amazing things are there for the taken. Not every moment you go for may yield the results you wish, but not going for it will yield nothing. I'm able to share this through my experience. I didn't seize every opportunity. I wish I had spent longer on certain summits. I wish I had taken more time to swim in a Maine lake all to myself. And, in certain things, I wish I'd possibly had more time. Time - the greatest gift you can give someone. As stated in my last entry, find something you're passionate about it pursue it with the utmost stubbornness. What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail - if you could fail? What would you do if you weren't afraid?I challenged this question to Yogi at some point earlier in the day. I like to think she'll be just fine. I like to think Rabbit and I were able to answer that to ourselves after exchanging a hug and farewell as I jumped on my last train to the Philadelphia airport. We both parted ways knowing we had accomplished something that tested us every day for ~5 months. Something much bigger than ourselves. Something no one can take away from us. Over the next ~12 hours I'd make my way via 2 flights to Charlotte, NC and eventually Indianapolis where my twin brother greeted me with a warm smile and hug as I limped out from the terminals. The feelings of what I take from the experience, what I left behind me, and what I'd do differently if given another shot weighed heavily on me as I sauntered through the busy airports filled with too many people in a hurry. The flatness and emptiness of Indiana came as a shock despite years of familiarity. It'll most definitely take time for me to transition back into what once was seen as the only way to be. I know the 2 styles can coexist, though, which will be my goal.For now, however, it's still a process. I know I have the friends who can relate and can utilize them if need be. I know I have someone who, if only briefly, made me feel steady and confident again. And, of course, I have my family, friends, and supporters. I'm currently sitting on a couch next to my brother and well-fed cat in my absence, Jasper. NFL football is on TV. Life, for me, has seemed to be in an extended state of a slow hibernation when compared to what I knew before. Football brings with it a sense of energy and life which will, I'm sure, help in my transition. The thoughts of lazy siestas with the USS Bennington atop Vermont mountaintops, of calming views from Virginia ridge lines, and of a soft voice on a midnight train will keep me appreciative of just exactly what I was able to experience.Thank you again for all the kind words from all of my supporters, both on FB and TJ. You all are awesome and were my version of the "5th Man." A lot of what some of you shared was much too kind. I could only smile, hike on, and continue sharing my experiences in the best way I knew how. If and when my next adventure comes, I will be sure to reach out to all of you with an invite to join me again. Again, thank you so much to my family, friends, and past/fellow/future hikers for the continuous support over the months. Thank you to the TJ website for providing an outlet to share my journey. An especial thanks to the TJ community (most recently Carol, Don, Kim, Alexandra, Nancy, both Mike's, David, Bonnie, David, Tactfree, Drew, and good ole Spot of Tea.)All of your support helped get me to Katahdin so here's to all of you, to having dreams, and to next time.