Date: 2018-07-20
From: Andover, ME

To: Stealth camping 
Miles today: 14.5

Today was better. I really tried to start with a better attitude. Having my phone back helps a lot though. Not only was I able to listen to music all day, but I got to make some long overdue phone calls last night and get a much needed pep talk from my anchors back home.  Last night I stayed at a hostel in town called The Pine Ellis Lodging & Hostel. In the guide book, it sounds super legit - full kitchen, free laundry, fresh linens, and shuttle service to/from trail, etc. In reality though, it was just an old house occupied by two old ladies who just let you have the run of the place lol. There were little post-it notes all over the kitchen and bathroom that told you the rules, what you were allowed to touch and what wasn¢t for you. A note on the door to the living room said ¢Please take a shower and do laundry before entering.¢ Point taken Lol. They gave hikers a ride to the trailhead every hour. I chose the 9am slot because sleeping in on a real bed sounded heavenly, and it was. Most people left at 7 or 8 though. Ten miles into my hike, I crossed a second road on trail that also led back to the same town, Andover, ME. Torino and Spider were sitting by the road waiting for a ride back into town. They had stayed at Pine Ellis last night as well, and were now dipping back into town to stay at a different hostel. The whole idea was very tempting, but I resisted and decided to keep hiking. Torino I knew from Pennsylvania and Spider is a girl I¢d just met about a week ago at a hostel in Gorham, NH called ¢The Hiker Barn¢. And it was exactly what it sounds like - a barn full of bunks for hikers lol. I took a zero day there after finishing ¢The Whites¢. I needed it both mentally and physically. Spider, Torino, and a whole bunch of other hikers waded in and out. A lot of SoBos mainly, so all new faces. I mention all of this because Spider, and almost every other NoBo in there, was having a real tough time. There was a psychological funk in the air and I was feeling it too. New Hampshire fucked us up and we were all jaded by it. Spider started in Georgia, only has one state left and less than 300 miles, and she talked about wanting to quit! Like legit, she might go home. I can¢t understand how quitting can be an option when you¢re that close to the finish line, but she did look absolutely miserable. Therefore, I wasn¢t surprised to see her on that road today headed back for another night in town. I just really hope she makes it out. After parting ways, I headed back into the woods and did a 3,600ft climb up Old Blue Mt. One of the most discouraging things about NH and ME that I¢ve had to come to terms with is high speeds and high mileage no longer matter. Before NH, I was doing around 17 miles a day at 2.3 mph easily, no matter the inclines. Now though, there¢s days where 10-14 miles absolutely kills me. And some parts of trail become so technical I only move a mile per hour. When you¢re used to looking at your speed and mileage as a way to track your success and progress, it¢s hard to do a 10 mile day and still feel proud of yourself. I¢ve been having those days a lot lately, which was a big contributor to my shitty attitude. Today though, I decided that it¢s not a race. I¢m not competing with anybody. I¢m not trying to keep up with anybody. I¢m just hiking. And everyday I¢m just taking another step forward toward my goal. Whether that be 7 miles or 17 miles, doesn¢t matter. Progress is progress.