Date: 2020-03-06
To: Leeks Canyon
Miles today: 7.0
Weather: overcast clouds

Two years ago today at this time, I found myself standing around a warm campfire on a cold night in northern Georgia, sipping on my favorite beer, Dogfish Head 120 minute IPA. There were about 14 of us at the shelter that night, all Appalachian Trail thru-hiker hopefuls. After dark, there were only 4 of us left by the fire. One of them said ¢you know, statistics say only 1 of the 4 of us will make it to Katahdin, who¢s it going to be?¢ We all thought it would be ourselves, and we were all right. To the best of my knowledge, all 4 of us completed our thru hike in 2018. As for the other 10, they were not enjoying the fire and a great beer, but instead were in bed, preparing for another grueling day of hiking. I can only confirm one of the other 10 finished, and I can definitely confirm several did not. So the overall ratio pretty much checks out.Everyone was astonished that I would carry a full bottle of beer 12.6 miles up Springer Mountain to the shelter, just to drink it by the fire on my first night. Honestly, the worst part was packing out the empty bottle for a few days until the first trash can at Neel Gap. The hikers at the shelter that first night who went to bed early were hiking it just to say they did it, not to enjoy and embrace the experience. They were even more flabbergasted when I said ¢It¢s going to be more impressive when I carry one through the 100 mile wilderness and up Katahdin. Well, I did. (Even though my friend Evan volunteered to carry it the 100 miles until the Baxter State Park entrance for me). I saw this attitude in New Hampshire and Maine, at the end of their epic hikes far too much. Swarms of miserable people just trying to get it done and not enjoying it. Those people undoubtedly had regrets after they finished.In the 2 years that have passed since I started my hike, I¢ve found it much more relevant to celebrate the start of my hike, rather than the finish. I feel the start my hike took way more courage than it did to finish it. I had to give up all that I had worked for in my career, knowing there was no guarantee of finding a job that was as good as the one I had just willingly left. I gave up my friends, a relationship, and a secure job and housing in New York, and knew I would have to start over when I was done. But once I was on the trail, I loved it so much and I knew there was nothing that would stop me from completing it. Finishing my hike only took stamina and will power, not courage.Now I am celebrating the second anniversary of starting my thru hike, and I did the same thing, but double the distance of the hike. It took me a while to get into a state of reflection this time. I feel like it had been so long ago, and I almost couldn¢t relate to what I was doing 2 years ago, or even 1 year ago. I was trying to reflect on my hike, and force myself to wish I was starting the AT again. It was not working. I was just sitting in deep snow on the backside of Snowking Mountain with a great beer and my ski boots on. Only once I started focusing on what I¢ve accomplished since my hike did I start to feel anything significant. And there it was... I can honestly say I¢m glad I am where I am now, and not starting another thru hike. My long term goal is to get my triple crown, which is hiking the AT, CDT, and PCT. But I¢m very happy where I am now. Jackson has been amazing. I am 5 times more active than I was in NY with all the skiing, snowboarding, hiking, volleyball, hockey, backpacking, fly fishing, mountain biking, you name it. The mindset and competitive nature of everyone here is what I need. This area continues to amaze my by how beautiful it is. I work for a private clinic for great people, and with great people. It¢s  something I never thought I would find in healthcare.A lot of people have asked me if I wished I was starting another thru hike again this year. My answer is a simple ¢Nah, I¢m good... I¢m really good¢. Hopefully someday I¢ll be in a place to challenge myself for another 2,000+ mile hike, but I love where I am right now. The trails will always be there, and I¢ll be more than ready when the time is right.