Date: 2007-09-04
From: Bald Mountain Brook Lean-to

To: Shaw's Boarding House
Miles today: 18.7

It is a cold morning and it is getting harder and harder to get out of my bag in the morning. I love when I am so nice and toasty warm, and the air is crisp, and I just wake up to the light breaking. I lie still in the shelter and peer through the trees. At first, their silohettes are unclear...appearing as a mass of black against a deep, dark blue sky. Then the blue begins to fade to a lighter shade, quietly changing hues to cast more details upon the trees. The birds begin to wake up and sing. I lay there, snug and warm, waiting and watching. Yellow begins to add its color to the palate, taking over and chasing away the night. Time to get up and start my day.   I hiked up and over Moxie Bald Mountain (2629).It was really windy up there today. I wanted to spend more time up there, but the wind was sharp and cutting. I got down and back into the trees quickly. I was debating if I should hike a blue blaze into town and make it a shorter day, or hike an additional 4 miles and hitch in. If I take the blue blaze, I would have to hike two miles off the AT and then return there in the morning. Since I don't carry a phone, I couldn't call the shuttle, and as a female hiker, I won't hitch alone. I will decide when I get to the blaze and see if anyone is with me...if not, I will hike the blue blaze into town.   When I arrived at the blue blaze junction, no one was around, so I hiked the two miles into town. I arrived at 3 pm. I was tired. I showered andhad a room to myself...no snoring...YES! I checked for my maildrop and it wasn't there. I called Bob to confirm he mailed it. It was delayed a day because of Labour day weekend. Hopefully it would be at the Post Office in the morning.   I now had to decide how much food to carry. Monson is the last town before the 100 mile wilderness. You need to carry enough food to get through as there is no place to resupply in between, other than White House Landing, which has limited resupply.   I sat with Pop-Tart, a ridgerunner in the wilderness. I told him I wanted to finish on September 11th, Rachel's Birthday. It would be do-able, but I may have to push it. I debated. Pi suggested taking my time as this last section is the "Crown Jewel" of the AT. But I am soooo homesick. It is so agonizing!I need to sleep on this. If my maildrop doesn't arrive, I have to wait. I called Bob again and told him I was shooting for September 11th, and he needed to make arrangements to be in Millinocket. I also told him it was tentative, as my maildrop was not here yet. I would call him in the morning, and let him know for sure then.   Ishmal, Grasshopper, M & M, TwoDogs, and Ziola and I went to Spring Creek BBQ and had dinner. What a great place. We discussed how we were each going to approach the 100 mile wilderness. Grasshopper, TwoDogs and M & M would have Grasshopper's wife drop food to them on a logging road in the middle of the wilderness...wow. I guess if you have car support, you can do that. They offered that I could have food dropped to me as well, but that just didn't feel right for me. I thanked them for their generous offer.   I hiked through the Smoky Mountains (70 miles) and carried all my food as a test for this. I know I can do it now. I didn't get off in Newfound Gap and resupply. I felt proud of myself for not having to resupply. Anyway, if I had to resupply, I could go to Whitehouse Landing. Now the only question left is - how many days will it take me to get to Abol Bridge with 15 miles left of the trail. I would decide in the morning.   I went over my gear and decided what extra weight could be sent home at this point. I packaged up some clothes, and a few miscellaneous items that I wouldn't need for the final week to ten days and would send it home in the morning. This would allow me to carry the extra food I'll need.   At this point in time, I have to say that my homesick feeling is growing by the day. I have feelings of just wanting to be finished to never wanting it to end. It is so bittersweet. It is comforting to know that everyone is going through similar mixed emotions. I will be hiking down the trail laughing as I reflect upon the good times and shortly I will find myself in tears. It is crazy and yet I find other hikers are experiencing the same thing. It can be confusing at times to say the least. I hadn't heard of this before. I don't recall hearing about how emotional this leg of the journey is. Maybe because only 20% of the hikers who start out make it this far. So there aren't as many hikers who discuss it. Then it starts to slip in...I have hiked through 14 states. I have hiked through 6 National Parks. I have hiked over two thousand miles! I have 115 miles left on this trail. I have a new respect for myself.