Date: 2003-08-13
From: Carlo Col Shelter 2,945

To: Speck Pond Shelter 3,440
Miles today: 9.5
Weather: broken clouds

Today was tough. Emotionally, mentally, and physically tough. The toughest day on the trail so far. I got up around 6:00 and we were on the trail by 7:15. The thunder started shortly after we left the shelter, we got a little bit of rain, and a bit of lightening that only struck while I was on top of a mountain above tree line so I was the tallest thing up there. It was great! Our first 4.5 miles weren't too bad, but it took me about three hours. The second leg of our journey is the reason today was so physically challenging. We went through the Mahoosuc Notch. It is a one mile stretch of boulders and it stressed me out. It was like putting a puzzle together. I went over, under, and around the boulders, whatever I had to do to get through it. I could periodically hear Sweet Ass and Booble singing while they worked their way through. They were loving it and had a good time. I wish I would have enjoyed more, but that just isn't my kind of hiking. I was intimidated once again by that terrain. After we made it through the notch, we had to climb the Mahoosuc Arm. This climb wasn't that technical, but it was long. We climbed from 2,480 feet to 3,765 feet in 1.6 miles. In case you're wondering, that's steep! It wasn't as slick as I thought it would be though. Right before we entered the notch the rain stopped and the sun came out. When you enter the notch, the temperature drops about 10 degrees because of the water underneath (it has ice in it year round!) and because it is such a narrow crevice, the sun doesn't hit it for very long. There are rock walls on either side of the notch. Beautiful place, but I will never go back with a backpack. Day hiking might be a different story. My disposable camera isn't working either, so I have no pictures of this amazing section of trail. I hope Booble took some, but I bet he didn't. After the notch and the arm, I was exhausted. I got to the shelter and the guys were here. I asked them if they planned to do seven more miles to the next shelter. They said yes and it was already 5:00. I had thought about this all day and made the toughest decision I've had to make on this entire trip. I didn't go with them. I told them I was exhausted and was going to stay at this shelter. I got their contact information and we said goodbye and they left. It was weird. They didn't seem surprised and seemed a bit apathetic about it. I was sad and upset, but my body and mind were not up for another difficult seven miles that I would not finish before dark.I cried after they left. I am still sad and I miss them already, but I feel a certain amount of freedom now that I am on my own. I guess I feel I can truly hike my own hike now. I still want to finish no later than Sept. 1. I wanted to summit Katahdin with Sweet Ass and Booble. I still do. But their reaction when I didn't go with them was almost as if they expected me to catch them tomorrow, but I won't. I think this could be good for me and may try to camp alone for the first time tomorrow night. Kate the caretaker is here at the shelter tonight. We had met earlier in the Whites when she was working at a different location. I just spoke to her briefly then, but we talked a lot tonight and she is very cool. She listened while I explained about staying behind. She didn't make me pay the fee for staying here either. Awesome.Today was hard for many reasons. The terrain was the most physically challenging so far. I was feeling homesick this morning and missing my dog a lot. I was stressed over hiking the notch and knew when I woke up I may not be able to do a 16 mile day to keep up with the guys. Nothing about today was easy. I am ready to be home. I have a sign to kiss first and there is only one way to get to it.Goodnight Oscar.