Date: 2003-09-30
From: Best Western

To: Baxter State Park
Miles today: 0.0

I've got it. And I think, this time, I REALLY have it.So, I got up this morning and headed for Baxter State Park. This is the home of Katahdin, our final mountain on the AT, as well as the home of several big climbs. I figure, I came out here to hike...I am gonna hike! And the more uphill, the better! So anyway......I am driving down the road and this voice says, "What if this is the beginning?". Seriously! I looked around to see who was talking to me, and I heard it again. What if...instead of looking at this hike as coming to an end, and looking at it as a goal that I failed to achieve, what if it was the beginning? A big, elaborate jumping off spot for more growth, more adventure, more living?! I swear to you, I felt a click. You know, we look at the world from one angle and that becomes our reality, when all we need to do is change our perception a litle bit. Well, consider mine changed.I don't really know what I expected from this thru hike. I think I felt like I would walk away from it with all the loose ends neatly tied up in a bow. All my questions about myself answered, all my ideas about this world and its people formalized. Oh..and, I thought I would finish! Well, actually, I have known for a long time that I could not finish the trail in it's entirety this year, but I did think that the last section would come together gracefully. As I said the other day, the joke was on me! Only, this time, I see the humor in it. I am a work in progress....we all are. And..any lessons I have to learn, that COULD be learned in the space of six months, must have been relatively small ones to begin with.I think rather than label this hike as a success or failure at this point, I will wait a while. Neitzche said, "The value or dis-value of an act is determined by its consequence". In this case, I think it will be a while before any us will know whether or not my attempts were successful. What I choose to take and do with the things I learned will determine the sucess of this venture. And that, my friends, fills me with a sense of excitement and anticipation.And joy. So, you will not be hearing me say that I am a failure anymore!As for the remainder of this hike...I have hiked 688.8 miles. I will hit 700 within the next few days and I am very excited about it!! (Don't pay any attention to the mileage listed in my journal....it is all messed up!) 700 miles is a long way to walk with a 35 pound pack on your back and I am very, very proud of myself!As for this final mountain....I still don't know what I am going to do about Katahdin. The path that the AT takes to the top is, most probably, way over my head. 10+ mile round-trip with more than 4000 feet elevation gained. There is lots of bouldering and over a mile of hand- over-hand rock scrambling. Baxter does not allow night hiking, so given the 12 hours I have to do it in, I don't think there is a chance of me reaching the top. SO! I am going to take another trail to the top. Flexibility..it is the new name of the game! The trail I am going to try is also over 10 miles, but the elevation gain is around 2900 feet making it a little more doable for me. Oh, and it only has .2 of a mile of hand over hand rock scrambling! On top of that, I have several different ways I can approach it, so I think this is the way for me! If all goes well, Bumpkin and Jerry will take the regular AT to the top and meet me there. At which point, Bumpkin and I will do the be-all, end-all, most rousing-est rendition of the Dance of the Real Woman anyone has ever seen!So, pray for safe flights for Jerry and my parents, and good weather-preferably a Class I day-this coming Sunday. And around 1:00 in the afternoon, look up...cause I will be on the top of the world! Love, Anna aka Mud Buttwww.trailjournals.com