Date: 2014-01-30
To: Pests
Miles today: 0.0
Weather: clear sky

PestsA hiker was sleeping soundly in a shelter one night when he felt a furry tickling in his ear. (Yes, this is one of those stories that will make you cringe.) He was locked in the deep dream world that hikers get in where snores are ignored and mice can have their nightly track and field competitions on hikers in sleeping bags without waking them. Again tickle, tickle in his ear. Suddenly he wakes and freezes with the fear of some giant monster that has come to eat him. It is so perfectly dark that he cannot tell his eyes are open. Then he feels it again¢¦that soft fur brushing his ear.With a grunt of disgust, figuring it is only another mouse sniffing at his ear, he reaches one hand out of his sleeping bag and finds his headlamp. In a click bright light reflects off of the cabin like interior of the shelter wakening two more sleeping hikers. He then rolled over to get a look at the ear tickler and screamed. Five inches from his nose was a harry spider larger than the palm of his hand¢¦it¢s two front legs reaching for his face. ¢true storyYou didn¢t know you were going into war did you? What you will face on the trail-Have you ever been bugged? I mean really bugged. Like you go for a walk in the woods and a swarm of mosquitoes or biting black flies envelop you and make you run out of the woods. Sooner or later you will have to deal with the bugs. There is nowhere safe to run to. You will be bit. They are tough, ruthless, and annoying. Here are the bugs-Gnats or Black Flies- These are not like your ordinary household gnats¢¦these are the fighter pilots of the bug world and they do bite. They form a cloud and fly right in front of your face. They have two primary missions. The first is for one of the pilots to sacrifice himself by flying directly into your eye. You can almost hear him scream ¢kamikaze¢! This slows you down because you can¢t see and desperately want to get that bug out of your eye. This allows the second mission to unfold¢¦the rest of the troop take turns landing on your exposed skin and bite you.Hikers have tried numerous tactics to combat this worthy foe. The hand swipe into the cloud makes them break ranks for a moment but is ineffective. Walking backwards confuses them a little until you trip over a root and then it is feeding time. They don¢t seem to mind Deet¢¦having located you by your exhale. You can protect your eyes with glasses or goggles. But a no-see-um head net and light gloves work for me.You see more of these then any other bug.Deer and Horse Flies- The stealth bombers of the bug world. They don¢t drop bombs but circle you looking for a place to land. Landing in stealth mode, usually on your back, they then cut into you like acid on your skin causing a large and very painful bite. I use hand to hand combat techniques with these worthy combatants.Mosquitoes- You should know these guys by now. Except for slapping them dead and keeping on the move I have no defense for these blood suckers. (I refuse to use Deet or bug spray)Ticks- The infantry division of bugs. They will climb onto your shoes, grab onto you from anything you brush against, and they will drop onto you from trees above. Terrifying no? That is nothing compared to lyme disease¢¦one of the many diseases that they carry. In 2012 a large percentage of hikers got treated for lyme¢¦it is no joke. Someone I hiked with had over forty ticks removed from his skin with tweezers in one day.Hard to say what the best defensive technique is because I think we all got bite by ticks. Research lyme disease so you know the signs, symptoms, and treatments. Pick a defense and be diligent. Don¢t be afraid to ask your fellow soldier to check your skin for the enemy. Knowing how to remove a tick properly is mandatory training for any soldier in this war.Chiggers- A living land mine for the unsuspecting hiker. What can I say¢¦these are bad, but nowhere near as bad as ticks. Again, research to learn the signs, symptoms, and treatments.My main defense to bugs is the way I dress¢¦take a moment and look at the picture of me on my ¢about¢ page. I keep almost all of my skin covered with clothes, even on hot days, and they are tucked in such a way so no crawling bugs can get under them.The next soldiers in the war against hikers are determined to attack our supplies-Mice, Rats, and Squirrels- Rodent soldiers are after our food and gear. Intelligence suggests if they smell food, especially trail mix or peanut butter, in your tent or backpack they will make holes thru almost anything to get your supplies while you are sleeping. They also will climb up your bear rope to your supplies in a tree and have a feast.I¢ve seen many upset hikers with shredded gear and half eaten, contaminated, food in the morning. I¢ve even seen a nest in my backpack made from shredding the clothes other hikers had safely, they thought, hidden in their backpacks. In one night a battalion of mice managed to move the dog food in a backpack, hung six feet off the ground, into two boots fifteen feet away. Who can understand the cunning mind of such creatures? But they cannot get into a closed bucket.Oh, and they love chewing on filters. And can climb thru tubing into a platypus. ¢the horror!Also they have been assigned the duty of keeping the hikers in shelters awake¢¦along with our next pest-Birds- Owls can be quite loud and some of their screams are a long way from a ¢who¢. If you are unlucky enough to get two near you then you get to hear a long conversation. They do scare the mice away so a small good side to think about as you lay there not sleeping.On many nights as I lay awake in my tent I have wondered what a Whip-poor-will would taste like. This is the most annoying bird you could ever conceive. It is like a loud car alarm that will not shut up. Just thinking about them is upsetting. If one decides to perch near where you are trying to sleep you might as well go night hiking.And last we have spiders and snakes- These are both beneficial creachers we tend to be terrified of. Some are poisonous and have bitten hikers but this is the exception and not the rule. Watch your step and don¢t rile them up and you should be ok. Be gentle when you sit on the privy and don¢t look inside. LOLMost people would classify Bears as a pest but I don¢t. They are opportunists that more or less respect you¢¦but be warned if you hang your food it is fare game to a bear.Good luck in the war against pests.