Date: 2009-10-19
From: Virginia

To: Troutsville
Miles today: 180.0

This past week tested me--nearly to the point where I almost quit the trail completely. I was exhausted from lack of sleep, and the weather really got me down. I sent my winter gear home for a few weeks, and I learned my lesson big time! No gloves, no rain pants, no warm socks, no long johns¢¦only so I could save some weight. Never again will I be so foolish. At first when it started sleeting I thought it was neat, until it started snowing, and then I started to panic a little. I froze all through the night a few nights, and it was the most miserable I have been in a while. I broke down on the trail wondering why I was out here. I miss my family, my girlfriend and her family, my friends, and my mind started playing games big time. Up until now I have felt really confident in my ability to step up to the mental challenges of the trail, but one rainy, freezing day I started to loose it. I was going to quit. I called my dad, and he told me exactly what I needed him to say, which is why I called him instead of anyone else I think. I reevaluated everything. It doesn¢t help being alone every night either. It¢s one thing to be cold and with people, but when you¢re freezing and alone, it gets depressing really quickly. I hadn¢t seen any SOBOs for days. After a talk with my dad, I made a choice, and it was one of the best decisions I have made I think. I decided to stay out here and finish what I have started, to finish the journey, to not give up. I knew there would be bad days, but I didn¢t know that things would get this tough so soon. After making my decision to stay, things got a little better. I was walking on the trail and all of a sudden in front of me are a pair of gloves laying on the ground. At first I look around to see if anyone is around, but I realize that I haven¢t seen anyone for miles. Suddenly I get the feeling that God is smiling at me saying, ¢These are for you.¢ I couldn¢t believe it. I know that God has done great things for me, but when I had a need, he provided. That is what I truly believe. The weather was predicted to get worse, but the next few days were just fog. Cold fog is a lot better than cold rain! I was happy again, but later that night I suffered another loss. I was sleeping in this shelter when I felt something hit me in the head. At first I thought I was dreaming, so I stayed awake for a little while. No later than 15 minutes passed when a mouse crawled down my nose from my forehead! Ahhhh! I swatted the mouse off my face and turned on my light. I could feel its cold, wet feet on my nose, and that kept me up. For some reason it kept trying to get on my face. That¢s not the end of the story though. Normally I lay my socks out to dry next to my sleeping bag at night, and when I woke up, one of my socks had magically vanished! I looked everywhere for it and realized that the mouse had taken my sock! Normally I would think it was something funny ( I do now by the way), but when it was my only single pair of socks, that was a big deal to me. I try to look on the brighter side of things most of the time, so here are the positives that come from this experience. He took the bad sock ( it had holes in it) and he will have a much warmer winter now! It also forced me to get a new pair of socks, which happened to be available a few miles down the trail! It is amazing how many things work out better than I could have planned. I don¢t mean for this entry to sound all doom and gloom, so let me tell you some of the good things that have happened this week. I caught up with some SOBOS, Mountain Yogi and Smokin¢ Loon. They were just as excited to see me as I was to see them. We are trying to catch up with more SOBOs to form a group, so we aren¢t so lonely. When I read the trail logs at the shelters it seems as though everyone is alone about a day apart. No one wants to slow down, so I guess we will try to speed up. Sure enough we caught up with another SOBO, Hungry Creepster. Since it has been so cold, we all decided to split a hotel room and get back in shape to keep going. I am excited! Another exciting thing that I have been waiting my whole trip for happened today. I saw a bear! It was about 50 feet away from me in a tree, and when I came around the trail I scared it, and it slid down the tree and ran away. It was a cub. I could have taken him though. I did wonder where mama bear was, but I kept going before I could find out. Another thing that happened to me today for the first time is being bit by a dog. People are so inconsiderate sometimes. This guy walking toward me on the trail has two big dogs on a leash that are obviously out of his control. As the dogs are snarling at me showing their teeth, he smiles and says,¢ Oh they¢re nice dogs, they won¢t bite,¢ As soon as he says this, one of the dogs lunges at me getting a hold of my arm. What an idiot! People always think their pets are well mannered, but if you¢re going to get a dog, at least be able to pull back on the leash please! I told the guy to have a nice day and kept going. What else could I do right? It is nice to write what I am feeling now, because it helps me feel better about things. I try to keep positive perspective on things most of the time, but even every once and a while things get rough. This next week is going to be great, and I am so happy that I have decided to continue. Oh and one more piece of advice. Don¢t pee into the wind, even if you think the wind is going with you!