Date: 2005-10-09
From: Mansfield, CT

To: Mansfield, CT
Miles today: 0.0

October 9, 2005Storrs CT 0 milesToday, my last blister/callous reached bottom. It was the one in the metatarsal area of the left foot. It was the one that pressed on a nerve resulting in a lot of pain. When it hurt, I could not take a step¢¦not one. I am through hiking for the year. I have decided that (until next year) I will not hike over 5 miles at a moderate pace with little elevation loss or gain and with only a very light pack weight.I have been thinking about my AT hike. I had no experience other than day hiking prior to starting. I owned no camping or hiking gear and bought some of what I brought as little as 2 weeks before starting. I had not done overnight camping since I was about 11 years old. To say that I was inexperienced would be a great understatement. I was clueless. Everything was a challenge. My first week or so was strictly a survival exercise. The first month was primarily very cold, windy and snowy and icy. It was survival with the elements. I learned to camp and hike as I went. It was my third quite cold night before I figured out how to use the mummy top of my sleeping bag. I did not have very much cold weather clothing. To keep warm, I had to keep hiking and build up body heat or be in my sleeping bag.I had help and advice from many hikers such as Terapin, Blackbird, No Legs, Figaro and many others. I found that almost everyone was kind and helpful and almost always more experienced than I. I was truly grateful for their help and advice and should have listened more than I did. It was a true community. I met many wonderful and interesting people (Dads Grin, Red Rover, Tofu, Alabama Bob, Whitee, Cotton Joe, Buckwheat, Proteus, The Brits, Seneca, I can, Mr Magoo, Ranger, Miles MacDuff, and many others). For 2 months and 11 days, I was part of that community and feel as though I will always belong.When I started, I expected to finish as everyone expects. My more immediate goals were to learn how to hike and camp looking forward to hiking the Grand Canyon in 2006 (still in the planning stage). It was also a break from my previous life. I had recently sold the business that I had owned for 33 years and then had retired. I had worked indoors for 33 years and wanted to experience the great outdoors. I wanted outside for a change. I wanted time to think and to experience new things, places, and people. I had also recently gotten married for the second time.I did make mistakes. I never did eat enough. The legendary hiker appetite never kicked in for me. I lost 25 pounds. I finally felt weak and had little energy and no reserve energy. I carried too much weight at the beginning (45 pounds). In Hot Springs, I switched to inadequate light shoes that caused a lot of foot problems. Once I developed some confidence, I hiked too far, too fast and too long. As I hurt more, I went longer and further when I should have slowed down or taken more days off. When I got off trail, I was 24 days ahead of my planned schedule. Ultimately, the hike had become an endurance trial for me.   It was not fun any more. I knew that I was making mistakes but made them anyway. My planning was better than my execution. I got to where I just wanted it DONE and was greatly relieved when I finally decided to get off trail after 960 miles. I had one of my best hiking days after making that decision. I had a since of relief and had fun again. I hiked slower and took many breaks. I finally hiked like I should have been hiking. I finally found my own hike. I wish that I had found it sooner.