Date: 2012-04-23
From: Double Springs Gap Shelter

To: Gatlinburg
Miles today: 10.7
Weather: light rain

So cold.  Words fail to describe the coldness.  It was to the bone.  And you know it was cold because none of the twenty people were snoring.  Because nobody was sleeping.  Just shivering.  You just didn't want to move out of the space that you had somewhat warmed up.  And going to the bathroom was completely out of the question.  We had a big group of section-hiking early birds causing a ruckus starting at 6:30am.  They didn't clear out until 8:30.  Perhaps I am holding others to my own standards but I am the sort of guy who is pretty quick out of a shelter.  Today though, I was the last one out.  I just didn't feel like bumbling around in the mayhem.  Plus, it was darn cold.  I went out and battled the snow drifts to get the food bags for those still in their sleeping bags.  I hopped back in my bag on the top bunk and doubled up on the Pop Tarts this morning.  And Butcher noticed.  He was quick to comment too.  800 calories should get me some major miles.  I bummed some hot water from the section hikers and made some jasmine tea and sipped it from the comfort of my sleeping bag.  Bliss.  I didn't really have the right clothing setup for the weather.  I had on my frozen (I even left them by the fire) trail runners, short socks, tall socks (also frozen), 3/4 length tights, running shorts, a T-shirt, two tank tops, and a sun shirt.  I warmed all this stuff up underneath my down jacket and pants.  I kept my beanie on and put my gloves on.  Most people were wearing socks on their hands today.  I took off my jacket and pants, put them in my dry bag and went into fast mode.  I put my pack on and covered all of this up with my Packa.  I left the shelter and headed out into the storm.  I knew I would have to move fast to stay warm in the wind-blown snow.  I hiked through the snow and my hands just wouldn't warm up.  I really had to get moving to keep things warm and realized the balance between safe hiking on slippery surfaces and warm hiking in cold temps.  Uphill was about right but downhill was treacherous.  Clingman's Dome, a giant spirally concrete viewing platform, was off-trail and the visibility was non-existent but I was in a really good mood and decided the extra mileage was worth it.  I was hiking with Easy Rider and we met Houdini on the paved path up to the dome.  Some crazy weather for sure!  I had gotten cold and needed to jet so I bid Easy a temporary farewell and I ended up passing all the hikers except Butcher.  I was in mileage mode and the weather was gnarly so I just busted it out to the gap to try and hitch from the road.  I have heard that hitching into Gatlinburg is difficult.  But they had a brewery!  I think the combination of weather and my hype surrounding the brewery convinced the group to come into town.  Hitching in a group only works if you have girls.  We were six dudes with frozen beards trying to get rides.  Nobody was stopping.  We split up, some of us worked the parking lot, I stayed out on the road with Houdini.  Butcher and Easy got a ride in about half an hour, Rhyno and Bill got picked up by some folks leaving the parking lot and Houdini and I kept our thumbs out and smiles big as the snow pummeled us face-first.  It wasn't miserable because the challenge was fun and everybody who passes by handles the uncomfortable situation differently.  I am human.  You can wave, smile, shrug, or whatever else you want but completely ignoring me is a little silly.  We all live here.  I am not less of a person because I don't have a car and am requesting a favor.  Eventually, a very nice woman (Suzy) and her daughter picked us up in her Ford Ranger.  After the hour wait, a 15-mile ride to town sitting in the back of a truck in the snow seems like a miracle.  Your feet get cold but the cab blocks most of the precipitation.  We arrived and Suzy and had called ahead and checked prices for us at a few of the motels and steered us clear of the skeezier ones.  We checked into the Microtel and showered.  The Microtel had a ridiculous bed orientation where the two beds face each other in a long narrow room but it was close to a Mexican restaurant and a pancake house.  After a 27-oz margarita and a giant burrito, we went walking.  On the agenda was my never-ending quest for Crocs, Easy wanted to get a tattoo, Bill needed sunglasses.  We had to resupply our food and I wanted to pick up a long-sleeve shirt at an outfitter as well.  I finally found Crocs but they were bright orange.  I didn't care.  I barely thought about how great it would look with my bright green shirt, blue hooded jacket, rolled-up grey pants and yellow socks.  I was rockin' it hard.  But it was perfect for this town.  It is like a perpetual state fair.  Big neon lights, Ripley's, a space needle, and a bunch of terrible deep-fried foods.  Crocs: check.  Tattoo: check.  Sunglasses: check.  It was time for some beers.  I drank all but one of the ten beers on tap.  Drinks at the bar came to $1.10 after tax.  You could also order a sampler for $9.  We chose to go the individual route and the bartenders, Alicia and Megan, got us silly drunk and dealt with all of our hijinks.  The Bock (probably a helles or a maibock- they didn't have any info) and the Scottish Ale (smoky!) were particularly good.