Date: 2005-03-25
To: Prep #5
Miles today: 0.0

This preparation business is hard work! Between getting food ready for food drops, planning mail drops and trying to work, and to complete the NJ-NY-CT section of the trail before I leave, its been pretty hectic around here.Last weekend I did a beautiful section of Northern Jersey,from Unionville to the Warwick Turnpike, in the snow, of course. Actually the lower elevations were clear, but there were still drifts up to a foot on the west side of the mountains. I an SICK of snow! There were signs of Spring, 'though, calves in the fields with their moms, skunk cabbage in the swamps, and redwing blackbirds in the bushes.I wanted to say a word about food. Because I am gluten intolerant and have a special diet, I have to prepare food to be sent to me on the trail. This is, to be blunt, a pain in the butt. I find it almost impossible to imagine what and how much I am going to want to eat in the middle of July, but I need to make some attempt, or I'll be eating nothing but white rice and oatmeal. For a long time I was overwhelmed by the enormity of the problem and pretty much immobilized, but the thought of starving to death has finally got me going. It is certainly taking alot of the spontaneity out of this adventure. I'm beginning to feel more like I'm planning a military campaign than a walk in the woods. However, I keep telling myself I'm going to appreciate my forethought when I pick up a mail drop full of good food I can eat. (Either that or I'm going to say, "Oh, yuck! Not rice pasta again!") Other than food I'm pretty much set. I have decided to use a pocketmail to send in my journals to my son, J, who will transcribe them for me. It kills me to carry something that weighs that much (8oz), but it seems the only way I will be able to make regular entries, and keep in touch with emails, so from a low of around 9 LBs my base weight is creeping up to closer to 10! I know I'm going to be sorry when I am slogging up hill out of a town with 5 days of food and a full load of water, but I can always jetison stuff later if I find I don't use it. Anyway, I still need to order that, and I'm still working on the final design of my homemade pot support/windscreen/simmer ring, but every thing else is pretty much set. I'm starting to believe this is real. Not quite yet, though. I've found that I really don't believe things until they happen. For example, a few weeks ago, in Tai Chi class, I broke a board with my hand for the first time. Until the minute I did it I truly did not believe I could. Hitting it was an act of faith rather than conviction, and afterwards I was a different person somehow, more powerful, certainly more confident. It seems hiking the trail is going to be like that, an act of faith, rather than conviction. I still don't believe I can do it. I wonder when I will be convinced. Halfway through? In New Hampshire? or not until I am on the top of Katahdin?Because of this, the confidence that other people have in me and their encouragement has be a great help, at least to getting me out there on the trail to do it. Perhaps I should explain here to people who don't know me well that I have good reason for my lack of confidence. Two years ago I could not walk a half a mile without pain and fatigue. I didn't have any real disease. My body was just so poorly balanced and so out of shape, that even though I was active I was a mess, in chronic pain and dysfunction. Two things have really changed that; first, a program of postural exercises, called Egoscue, that I do every day, and second my Tai Chi practice. My husband, who is a chiropractor, has also been a great help. I wish I could take him with me for selfish reasons! Two weeks ago when I went to see my Egoscue therapist, Greg he was very encouraging, saying that he felt that I was ready to walk the trail. Its been hard work to get to this point, and I know if I don't keep up both the exercises and the Tai Chi I will slip back to being in pain and exhaustion. So every morning out on the trail I will be doing them. It will be a challenge in the rain!