Date: 2004-06-09
From: Paul Wolfe Shelter

To: Waynesboro
Miles today: 5.0
Weather: few clouds

Here¢s a quick poem, a lesson to teachI had to do miles, the post office to reachI hiked past everything like it was a raceFour miles per hour was my sickening paceFor 2 miles further the trail wore onThen I realized I was a _________ moron Why were there no blazes painted in white?Why was there a farmer¢s house on the right?Could it be that in my hyperactive hurryI¢d picked the wrong way for my Post Office scurry?Yes, it was true; I sat stunned like a foolThen had to hitch as reward for being a toolSo today as I hike this fine section I missedI have a lesson for you to hear, I insistThat if you are going to push somewhere fastDo not pick your direction like a jackassFor I know today it would be to my liking If I was chilling in town instead of re-hiking.The above poem is what I left in the shelter register as I re-hiked the section I messed up yesterday . The trail angel, Pam, picked me up at 8 a.m. & drove me to the trail. She also gave me brownies and Gatorade :-). The temperature was cool as I started walking. I had to re-hike 3 miles I covered yesterday just to reach the location of my wrong turn. I had a strong sense of D©j vu as though I had done it before :-). I ambled slowly at first, but soon I began to sway in rhythm as I sang gospel songs. Within an hour or so I reached the shelter and there composed my poetic masterpiece. The new section was nice with an easy slope and green all around me. With the exception of Columbine, there were few flowers. I prayed and wandered in thought as the miles slowly passed, then I encountered a 2000 thru-hiker named ¢Trail Bitch¢. He had received his name because he was always doing the grunt work for his wife. He told me how he got to the base of Shenandoah (where I am now) having never seen a bear¢¦then he lost all his food to a hungry bear that night¢¦eek. There are actually more bears per square foot in Shenandoah than anywhere in the country according to him. I would have figured it to be the Smokies, but either way, I will be careful. My last mile was hot. I met a thru-hiker named Austin who was hiking south to redo a section. We exchanged names and stories of hikers we knew. He received his name after ralphing up a pack of Austin crackers¢¦yuck! I demonstrated where my name comes from. By 12ish I was at the road. I bought a coke and went to hike back to town. I would stand there for an hour. When I finally did receive a ride it was from a younger guy driving a huge pickup. He told me all about hunting and bears while he chewed on a large chunk of tobacco. After 3 months in the south he seemed relatively normal to me though. I thanked him for the ride and started to walk the rest of the way to the YMCA. Before I reached my destination I saw a sign ¢Butch¢s Barber Shop¢. I tried but could not control the impulse welling inside me. I was going to have my head shaved!!!Ten minutes after I walked into the shop, I walked out of Butch¢s with a cueball head. I left my monstrous hiker beard untouched though¢¦I look like a very scary man. I can¢t wait to see my Mom¢s face (if you read this journal, please don¢t mention it to my mom, I want to surprise her :-). After returning to camp to see looks of shock from my hiker friends, I went to the YMCA with a razor and cream to finish the hob. After a shower and shave (he,he) I went to go to Wednesday night church. I went to the Baptist Church but could not find a way in. There were cars but no sign about a service. Confused, I finally gave up after 10 minutes. This saddened me because I really desire to attend church :-(. This is the first Baptist Church I have seen on the trail with no midweek service. When I returned ¢Esoteric Ninja¢ was busy manning the grill. We were having a ¢hiker potluck¢. Beartracks and I donated Hot Dogs and Rolls to the cornucopia of food. There were hamburgers, hot dogs, chicken, steak, and more. I had 2 delicious cheeseburgers topped with white cheese and mushrooms. I was about to eat more when Booboo arrived. When he finished laughing at my bald head he told us Beartracks and I were invited to dinner at Pizza Hut. Have I mentioned that Booboo¢s parents rock? After the 2 cheeseburgers I had 4 pieces of Pizza Hut Pan Pizza (2 pepperoni, 2 supreme) and unlimited Pepsi. Dinner was funny as we all talked. Booboo was ID¢d to drink beer¢¦ha, ha! Apparently his family was kicked out of the Comfort Inn. They snuck in their 2 little ankle-biter dogs. Booboo was letting his foul hiking boots air out in the hotel hallway. A hotel worker came to address the nasty boot ¢issue¢ and the dogs were discovered when the door was opened. I was rolling as his dad told the story. Tomorrow we are invited to breakfast at ¢Weasies¢¢¦I am so happy! We will hike by noon and hopefully cover 15 miles or so. Right now I¢m falling asleep with a party going on outside my tent. Nothing can phase me when I want to go to sleep though :-). As a note I continued not drinking tonight and I am growing comfortable with it. I look forward to further hiking with the triple B¢s: Booboo, Beartracks, & Beatbox. I just hope a 4th ¢B¢ doesn¢t join us: Black bear. As long as it doesn¢t, I¢ll write tomorrow. Goodnight,BEATBOX   ttt