Date: 2007-12-05
To: Whiteblaze thread
Miles today: 0.0

A very thought provoking thread on whiteblaze.net and some interesting responses have inspired this entry. The thread, addressed to fellow hikers, asks the following question:How determined are you to thru hike the AT this coming year...to go the distance? What will you be telling yourself when part of your mind insists on telling you to quit and go home? How will you make your hike fun?http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/showthread.php?t=30149If you're reading this as an observer, (or a hiker for that matter) I strongly suggest you take a look at some of the answers given by prospective thru hikers and recent thru hikers if you've got the time. There is a wide array of responses. Keep in mind that this is an AT website, so people posting on here didn't just decide on Feb 29 th to thru hike starting on March 1st. They have probably been planning for a long time. I think my answer is somewhat different than most/all of the responses. I'll do my best to explain. To me, the two ends of the spectrum are "I will hike as long as I am having fun" and "I don't care if I have 2 broken legs, I will crawl up Katahdin." If I had to pick one of the two, I would pick the latter, but there is more to it than that. Earlier in my journal, I stated that essentially, my hike is motivated by truth. Truth, not fun. I don't expect the whole trail to be fun, nor would I want it to. We learn a lot more true life lessons from the not fun times than we do from the fun ones. Also, I associate fun with leisure, and hiking the AT is pretty far from leisure. But whenever I am outdoors, away from society, away from distractions, I find a much more "truthful" or "real" experience. And I don't see that changing anytime soon. In essence, truth withstands the ups and downs of any trek, but basing a hike on having fun the whole time won't get you very far. "Not that there is anything wrong with that!" No seriously, I'm not just being PR here, doing something for pure fun is awesome, but not for me for 5 months at this point in my life. Plus, I DO expect to have SOME fun, just not all of it.But how am I going to convince myself when times get tough that this is an amazing, REAL experience whether I am liking it or not? First, I will take some suggestions posted on that thread. If I feel like quitting, I have already made a pact with myself to give it a few more days before I can reevaluate my status. But I think my best defense comes from 4+ years of integrating this "truth philosophy" into my life and learning about the AT. I truly believe this stuff I'm writing, and I'm pretty sure that will carry me a long way, as long as the AT remains "real". My Cornell experience "failed" because it stopped being "real." I think another way to combat the "why the hell am I hiking 2175 miles" syndrome is to avoid asking yourself that question. Part of my desire to hike the AT is irrational, and hikers with irrational reasons have to be content with giving their brains irrational answers. Brains don't like irrational answers, hearts do. So I'm going to try to avoid the "how much longer" questions, because I think you'll just piss yourself off. Right now my goal is to hike the AT, which will always be in the back of my mind. But while hiking, I honestly hope to not have many goals at all. I'm not saying I want to numb my brain, but I think goals can certainly interfere with that trendy high school yearbook mantra "Live in the moment!" Basically all western cultures covet goal oriented people planning for the future, which is fine, but not for your entire life. I want to live in 5 months full of moments. That is why this trip is so valuable to me.