Date: 2023-05-18
From: Thomas Knob Shelter

To: Hurricane Mountain Shelter
Miles today: 16.0
Weather: overcast clouds

Today was probably the easiest 16 miles I've done yet, EXCEPT for the very end. This is the AT I was hoping for today:"You know Argonaut honey, you've worked really hard this past month and a half. I know there's been a couple times you've thought about quitting, but you overcame those negative feeling and soldiered on and made it to 500 miles (I know it's technically only 499, but you've done some bonus miles, so I'm going to give it to you). Congratulations!!You know what? I'm going to do something special for you. I see that you're planning on 16 miles today. Now, I'm going to start you off a little tough, but I promise it'll be worth it. I'm going to take you through some of the most gorgeous scenery you've seen yet. And there will be ponies, and cows, and bears. And just for you, not for any other hikers, I'm going to have a pony, a cow, and a bear fight each other because I know how awesome you think that would be. But don't you worry your pretty little head off, they won't actually hurt each other. No, once you leave they will go back to drinking tea and eating biscuits because all the animals around here are secretly British. Now, once you see all that, it's going to be all downhills and level surfaces all the way to the shelter. Now, I can't do anything about the rocks and roots along the way. Those left wing hippies just go on and on about the trees and the environment. What can you do, am I right? Of course I am. But, they'll be plenty of great water sources and I'll even throw in a trash can because I know how you hikers love to get rid of your trash. Every little bit of weight removed helps!!So enjoy today's hike and I look forward to being there for you for another 1,700 miles."Instead, this is the AT that I got:"Hey AR-GO-NOT. For 499 miles (499? You're literally carrying a shelter on your back and you just had to stay at the provided one so badly that you couldn't go one extra mile. Some thru-hiker you are.) you've walked all over me, urinated on me, defecated on me, and you know what, I'M SICK OF IT.So here's what I'm gonna do. I see your stupid a** has decided to do 16 miles today. Well, I'm gonna start your idiot self going uphill. I'm going to take you through some of the most gorgeous scenery you've ever seen, BUT, I'm gonna cover that s*** in a blanket of fog so you can't see nuthin. And just to screw with you, because I know you're broken eyed a** will eventually have to take your glasses off, I'm gonna wait until you do and then you're gonna look around and BOO, there's gonna be a cow there that wasn't there when you walked past 10 seconds ago. It's not gonna do a thing except look at you with shame and disappointment in its eyes until it silently walks away into the mist.Oh and I know how much you want to see some ponies. So, I'm gonna drop two of them stubborn equines right smack in the middle of the trail and the only way you'll be able to get around is by trudging your a** through the tick infested brush. I hope you get lymn disease and become allergic to red meat a******.Then, I'm gonna make you think you're coming up on a trash can, because I know how much you dumb hikers just LOVE getting rid of your 0.5 ounces of trash, as if that makes any damn difference, only to find out NOPE, it's a bear box sucker!! HA HA HA HA!!And here's the best part. I'm gonna make most of the trail pretty easy. Oh it'll still be rocky and rooty as hell, wouldn't want to give up the game by making it too easy. And you'll be walkin along with a stupid grin on your face saying to yourself 'gee, today has been pretty easy and I'm making great time', but then right as your nearing the end and your feet are starting to get a little sore... BAM... hike uphill 950 feet for two miles!!! Have fun with that! HA HA HA HA! Oh, and by the way, hike uphill to the shelter also b****"All joking aside, today's hike was actually really good. Even with the fog, the Grayson Highlands are probably my favorite spot I've been so far. The fog even added a sort of eerie atmosphere, which was neat (for about 10 minutes anyway, then I wanted it to go away). If and when I come back next year for Trail Days, I may start at the Highlands and hike from there into Damascus. Speaking of Trail Days, it's a very large hiker festival that is held in Damascus every year. I don't know what the population of Damascus is normally, but I wouldn't think it's more than a couple thousand. Well, Trail Days brings in an average of about 20,000 people. Major vendors show up, there's a hiker parade, there's tent city where everyone who is staying sets up their tents. It's basically a party for several days from what I've heard.Unfortunately I already passed Damascus, so I won't be going this year. There are people who shuttle back in order to attend, but I'd rather just keep hiking forward. I'll come back next year when I am not so concerned about my average miles and whether or not I'll have enough time to make it to Katahdin. Breakfast: Two blueberry fig bars and an apple breakfast bar Lunch: Two Sargento cheese and nut trays, two Little Debbie apple pies, and some Jolly Ranchers.First Dinner: Good To-Go Pasta Marinara. This one was pretty good and had 750 calories which isn't bad. I think next time I will try adding some chicken to give it a protein boost.Second Dinner: Knorr Taco Rice with two packets of Starkist white chicken.