Date: 2007-04-12
From: Roan High Knob Shelter

To: Apple House Shelter
Miles today: 14.7

Katter-Pilllar and the Blustery DayBy A.A. Katter-PilllarKatter-Pilllar awoke one morning to the sound of a fierce wind driving at what seemed to be all sides of the cabin - if he had ventured outside at that moment, he would have found to be correct - the cabin, of course, was mounted near the summit of Roan Mountain, so the weather was just naturally crazy.After he wiped the crust from his eyes and watched the silhouette of Ross cook oatmeal and pack up, he sat up against the wall and had a think."Think, think, think," thought Katter-Pilllar."Should I do a 25-mile day or a 14-mile day?"He took a peek out the window, and to his utter delight, the sky was clear, and small white, puffy clouds were billowing with the gusts. Much different from the day before, which had been dreadfully overcast and rainy.Katter-Pilllar slipped on his moccasins, climbed downstairs to where the rest of the hikers were eating breffikst and thinking about the day ahead, and hurried outside for a morning micturation. While holding his fireman and letting loose the hose, he decided to hum a hummy tune. It went something like this:Hum hum humI'm humming a hummy tuneHum hum humIt's fucking cold outsideHum hum humI'm going back inside before my hands fall offAnd back inside he went! When he got back up to the attic where he had spent the night, he saw that Ross had finished breffikst and was packing up. Katter-Pilllar, too, decided it would be wise to grasp the day by the horns and pack up before it became any later.As our young hero was shoving all of his shit into his backpack while munching on a store-brand Poptart, the Widowmaker, who was below, called up to him, inquiring if he were almost ready. Katter-Pilllar replied in the affirmative, and before long he, the Widowmaker and Footpump, three chum who had grown accustomed to each other's presence on the trail, were outside the cabin ready to take on the day!Upon inspected the plaque outside the cabin, Katter-Pilllar was disappointed to find that it didn't read "Mr. Sanderz" but instead indicated that it was the highest shelter along the entire Appalachian Trail, 6285 vertical feet. After discussing the newfound knowledge amongst themselves for all of... 3 seconds, the three amigos began their descent into the billion-acre wood, together - because it was very steep and slippery with ice.They hadn't gone more than 1/10 of a mile when Katter-Pilllar stopped in his tracks."Oh no! We forgot Twiglet!""Silly old Katter-Pilllar," laughed Footpump. "Twiglet, being a small and fragile creature, is at least 10 miles behind us.""Plus," added the Widowmaker, "we barely even know him - why bother to bring him up?""Something about his name, I guess..." said Katter-Pilllar.And so they continued downward, occasionally falling and slipping on the crazy ground, until they finally reached Carver's Gap, an area where the AT left the woods temporarily and rounded over two balds of high elevation - Round Bald and Jane Bald. It was here that Katter-Pilllar temporarily separated from his compadres to sterilize some water, and was thus forces to brave the balds himself.Up on the balds, it was very blustery - so blustery in fact that he had trouble staying on the trail - but that's what happens when your insides are all fluff and not flesh.The vistas from the balds were wonderful, as usual, but they were so blowy that Katter-Pilllar had no choice but to continue on, despite an urge to sit down on the summit and have a hunny lunch with dry Ramen noodles.Eventually, he made it so far as to descend Jane Bald, and cralwed his way to the first shelter of the day, the Stan Murray Shelter. Along the way he picked up a red windbreaker that looked to belong to the Widowmaker. Might I mention that it was still very blustery, and the fact that Widowmaker's windbreaker flew off his backpack did not surprise Katter-Pilllar at all.Katter-Pilllar feasted on cheese and tuna wrapped in a tortilla at the shelter with Footpump and the Widowmaker, and by and by Ross swung by as well - he had taken a detour on Jane Bald as he could obviously stand the intense winds on top of the mountains because his insides were made of flesh, not fluff.Presently, the three friends minus Ross made their way to the next shelter, the Overmountain Shelter, less than 2 miles away. The Overmountain Shelter was a big, red barn that had been bought by the ATC and converted into a hiker shelter. It had a magnificent view, and Footpump enjoyed it so much that he decided to spend the night there. The Widowmaker left shortly because he wanted to hitch into town about 8 miles away, and the Katter-Pilllar, well he kept Footpump company for about 4.5 hours, because he wanted to do some night hiking.In the meantime he sunned himself on the hillside, and hummed a hummy tune that went something like this:Hummy hum, hummy humIt's sunny at this shelterHummy hum, hummy humIt's becoming blustery at this shelter!Hummy hum, hummy humAw shit, it's cold! Time to get a move on!And cold it had become! The wind had blown some nimbus clouds directly in front of the sun, instantly changing the temperature of the area to a dead cold.Katter-Pilllar said, "Cheery-o, good chap!" to Footpump, and left him at that large, drafty red barn right around 5:00.Katter-Pilllar was immediately faced with two enormous climbs - Little Hump Mountain and Hump Mountain - little did he know that the mountains - 2 enormous balds justting into the air, were actually dormant heffalumps - but that was a secret.It was so very blustery on top of those heffalumps, and the second one, Hump Mountain, seemed to go on forever. But, once again, there were some amazing views, and Katter-Pilllar was glad he was out hiking the AT.Katter-Pilllar arrived at the Apple House Shelter, 8.2 miles away from the last one, shortly before 9 o' clock. There, he found Mr. Ed, whose thick West Virginian accent he could barely understand, and Tim, whom he had met breifly at Overmountain Shelter, sleeping, or at least trying to sleep. Katter-Pilllar made dinner, and decided to cowboy camp - that is - sleep under the stars with a sleeping bag for protection, instead of sheltering it.And so they beat on, boats against the current borne ceaselessly into the past.