Date: 2008-09-06
From: Sugarlaof Mtn

To: Stratton
Miles today: 10.6
Weather: overcast clouds

It was a very steep descent down to the South Branch of Carabasset River, I had heard from others who had climbed it about how tough it was going to be, and it was going to be so steep for me that it would be dangerous. Well like so many others they clearly have not been hiking long in Maine, because it was no different to any other typical descent in this part of the world, got to stop listening to what other hikers tell me, particularly if they are old and fat. The river was gorgeous with all of the leaves changing color, the reds are totally gorgeous, mixed in with the yellows and greens, not something you would ever see back home. Climbed over the Crockers, the South and North one, and after some distance walked towards a road crossing, put out the thumb and caught a ride into town. Stratton turned out to be a very nice little place, very typical of these friendly little towns up here in Maine, I must say this state is really turning out to be my favourite overall. Caught up with both Freewil and New York Minute, New York Minutes feet were a sickening site, a clear case of foot rot, and the smell was dreadful. Banjo and Half Elvis met us up at the pub for a few beers, for diner is was a huge pizza, ate tremendous amounts, but never seem to be able to fill myself. Just a quick word about my turds. When out in the woods I am limited with what I can eat, and with all the exercise I don¢t tend to produce a lot of turds, or at least don¢t feel the need, but every few days I make my way into town where I eat like never before. I gorge myself till I feel sick, and even then there is stillroom for ice cream. Coming out of town I always feel sick, and then about a day later I have to do the mother of all turds. I will be casually walking down the trail when unexpectantly the feeling to do a turd bursts upon me. All I am able to do is take small steps off to the side of the trail, before I can even pull my shorts down half way it is already poking its head out. The size of it tends to be stupendous, and it feels like I am giving birth. It must be stretching my back passage to its fullest extent, and in pains of agony, and a red face I eventually pass it, It hits the ground with a thud and on some occasions will bounce a couple of times before finding a place to rest. Following this comes the softer stuff and it just keeps on coming like a soft serve ice cream machine like you would find at McDonalds that will just not shut off. Eventually it stops but it is always the same problem it is never a clean snap off. My butt hole is left wide open with a huge piece of soft poo stuck in it, I grab one of my butt cheeks and give it a wiggle, on some occasions rather violently trying desperately to wiggle it loose, sometimes a small piece drops to the ground, but never enough. I try to push some more but it only makes it worse, now there is too much hanging out, but it is just stuck there. So it is time to go in with the paper, and of course I get a huge smear. I have limited supplies of toilet paper but do my best to clean it all up. No matter how much I wipe my butt seems to still not of closed off, at the end of the day long after I have forgotten about this moment I will be sitting in my tent, and due to the cramped room my face is between my legs, and then the smell hits me. Oh yeah I forgot about that. The last of the poo seems to have made its way out, and from all the walking motion of the last few hours has been smeared all over my crack. It can be either sticky or tacky, or it has dried up and super glued my butt cheeks shut. Don¢t have to describe the pain of pulling them a part; I am sure you get the picture. It seems as though I am getting ass leakage, I always thought I was far too young to be getting this. With the sore legs, and the hobbling around in the mornings trying to warm up the body, all hiking does it provide you with a window into the future, what it is going to be like to be old.