Date: 2010-01-13
To: Weightless food.
Miles today: 0.0

Before I thru-hike or in this case, a half-hike (Georgia to Harpers Ferry) a visit to the grocery store must be made. The mission? To explore the aisles of riches, to hunt down foods that are kind to the body, kind to the taste buds and kind to the pack weight. Such a visit will involve an hour of roaming each aisle because you just never know.A few years back I discovered New precooked bacon ¢ fifteen strips of fatty pork that weighed a scant 2 or 3 ounces. Some people love Sudoku or PlayStation ¢ me, I love bacon and can smell it 12 miles from a trail town. No one has a faster hiking pace once my nose locks onto that sizzilin¢ breakfast pig.The search for that golden calorie is an interesting scavenger hunt. Several finalists have come to the top, but with so much out there maybe one of you will pass on your great discoveries. Here are a few that have emerged.From those great people who gave us their creamy milk chocolate, the Swiss, we get a staple food that most every hiker carry¢s ¢ cheese. But those blessed Swiss have gone the extra mile with their cheese by thinking of we weight conscious backpackers. Those alpine geniuses actually put holes in their cheese ¢ Brilliant! The Scandinavians have always been jealous of the Swiss for this ¢ all they ever gave us was ABBA. Who would of thunk it, pre-packaged ultralight cheese?Donuts aren¢t necessarily good for the body but who cares, they¢re donuts. Besides, they have a big hole in the middle to reduce weight ¢ Another brilliant design. Of course donut holes might be even lighter since holes weigh nothing because, well, they¢re holes. (Holes are nothing unless they¢re portable holes in which case you wouldn¢t want to eat them but rather step through them to visit new places like the planet Blueon ¢ A big ¢Nanu Nanu¢ to Blueon¢s everywhere, you know who you are).Angel food cake also has a huge hole in it to reduce its weight as well as being an air-filled sponge. Angel food cake could most likely be compressed in a compression sack down to the size of a bouillon cube to save space. Although this might need a warning label since popping the angel food cube into your mouth would trigger its quick return to normal size. I can¢t imagine anyones mouth able to hold a ten-inch cake, not even a thru-hikers.Cheerios and some pastas are hollow and light, but require something else to maximize their full potential. Muesli bread is awfully light without using any holes but its awfully awful. When hiking out of town with bread, I usually will have lifted all the choices on the shelf to find the one with the lightest touch. Even though I want the taste of bread I still don¢t want to carry one that approaches the load of a holiday fruitcake. The new mini bagels not only sport a hole, but also their diminutive size makes them space saving and a candidate for our consideration. Pitted olives are holey but who wants a big tub of olives after a 20-mile day? Seedless grapes might be Ok, but how heavy is a grape seed for that matter?And now the moment we¢ve all been reading for, the award for a food in the category of lightness, pack ability, taste and goodness is awarded to, ¢¦May I have the envelope please¢¦ ...TRAIL MAGIC! Yes, its light (you don¢t carry it), its good since it¢s a surprise and a gift in one. No space in your pack is required and most of all, its free!