Date: 2004-08-09
To: 'I did it my way'
Miles today: 0.0

Well, I guess it's time to wrap this whole thing up. For this year at least.Today is my 30th birthday. I had a 'Grand Plan' of celebrating it by being on the Trail. That isn't going to happen. It hadn't actually occurred to me until last Monday that I wasn't going to be on the Trail for my birthday - I know, I am a little slow on the uptake. Needless to say, there were tears. I wanted to be able to celebrate with my new-found friends: my second family. Instead, I am in London working: not going to have quite the impact I had intended. Que sera sera I guess. Choices were made and I stick by them.Yes, I am done. I know what I am going to say later on is going to contradict what I say now, but go with me on this.Turns out I didn't really enjoy hiking. I wanted to enjoy it, I really did, but it just wasn't for me. Don't get me wrong, the weeks that I was on the Trail were possibly some of the best times (and hardest times) in my life.I met some of the most amazing people - people whom I feel have helped make me a better person. I will treasure these friendships forever. I found that being a part of the Trail community makes you a part of a huge family, and I loved being a part of that family.But, even though 'The people are the Trail', there is only so much encouragement that others can give you to keep you doing something you don't really want to do.The second time I was ready to quit, in April, I had decided that that was it. Done and dusted, finito, kaput. I was all set to pack up my gear and head to the UK. Bob Peoples from Kincora told me that Mountain Man (Trey) might need some help at the Side Track Cafe for Trail Days and took me there to meet him. I am so glad he did. The people that I met during my time in Damascus, and the fun that I had being associated with the cafe were some of the most enjoyable and memorable aspects of my whole hike. I arrived there fully convinced that it was just a stepping stone before I left America. Being around hikers there, day in and day out, and my new-found friends changed my thinking about hiking. I still wanted to do it. So again, I changed my mind. I was going hiking again. The problem was that this time I was going for the wrong reasons.I found that out about a week after starting hiking again. It wasn't for me, although I really wanted it to be. I wanted to enjoy hiking.So I left the US and came to the UK, which had always been the plan, just not quite so soon. I also found out that adjusting to life after the Trail is not easy, especially in London. I miss my friends. I miss the clean air. I miss the feeling of freedom that I found on the Trail. But, I also needed to earn some money to pay the bills that have accumulated and for my future travel in the US at the end of September. I am meeting up with Mum and we are going to tour the States together. I will also catch up with some of the people I hiked with at various stages. I can't wait!And here is the contradiction: I am going hiking again next year. I plan to hike for a couple of months through Virginia, so that I can be at the wedding of Xena and Bloody Cactus in June. I know I could just as easily fly into an airport near there and be picked up, but I don't think I am done with the Appalachian Trail just yet. I could be wrong. I guess I will find out next year.I am so glad that I got to experience America this way first: the America that normal tourists don't usually see. The friendliness and hospitality that I experienced from total strangers was astounding.A few thank yous that need to be said:- Thankyou to Camera 1, Camera 2, Xena, Bloody Cactus and Leki for convincing me to stay on the Trail when I was ready to quit that first time in Georgia at Dick's Creek Gap.- To Leigh and Josh Saint (Hiker Hostel www.hikerhostel.com) for their support and encouragement during that first tough week.- To the Cameras, for supporting me along the way and keeping me going for as long as I did. To the families of the Cameras (Jim and Karen, John and Pat, Jim and Beryl, Betty and Bud, Maxi and Jimmy) and Xena (Carol and Winston) for welcoming me into your lives and making me feel part of a family when mine was so far away.- Thanks to the members of the Women Hikers' site for answering my endless questions and for their wealth of knowledge and support.- To all the people who provided Trail Magic along the way: Joe and Frances Kossan for bringing 6 smelly hikers into your home to share your kindness and love; Apple for your Trailside haven (note to self: if you are going to stop anywhere near a road crossing, make it AFTER the crossing as you never know what delights might be waiting for you AT the road crossing!); Bag O' Tricks, just for being you; Dave, for your 'river magic' -spending time with you and your kids was a treat; Frank and Cindy for putting us up (or is that putting up with us?) and for driving us to Millinocket to re-start the journey; The Shaw's, Bob and Pat Peoples of Kincora, and Miss Janet for having some of the best places to stay on the Trail.- Big thanks to Leif and Zipdrive for providing Trailjournals.com (and thanks for my t-shirt). Awesome site guys.- To Trey, for providing the 'Side Track Cafe' and letting me be a part of it. I am so glad to have had you as a part of my life. I am only sorry the Side Track couldn't go on. It has been a blast my friend.- To Kathy, Dennis and Jeff - the locals in Damascus who became good friends...and reintroduced me to abseiling (sorry Dennis, 'rappelling'). I look forward to catching up with you in October.- Candy Boy (sorry...Death By Cotton). We lived together 24/7 for the best part of 12 weeks or so (and didn't kill each other). If it hadn't been for you I wouldn't have gotten back on the Trail at all. Thanks for letting me tag along on the ride.- To my friends who sent me little bits and pieces along the way (Dallas, Marg, Sue and Jude, Cherie, Jeannick, Cyril and Lily and Frank for the Vegemite). Those little 'pick me ups' really helped keep me going.- To my friends and family and complete strangers who left me encouraging messages in my guestbook. I was often brought to tears reading them. Your unending support (there is that word again) really did help during some of my lowest times on the Trail. Thank you all.- Thanks to everyone for reading my ramblings. I hope you enjoyed reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them.- To my favourite Little Brother, who sent me an email that was so eloquent I actually didn't think he had written it, giving me the pros and cons for staying on the Trail. Thanks to you, that time I stayed. For your support, love and encouragement, thanks. Now if you could just get a job that fits in with the different time zones I travel to, we can talk more!- Finally, to my Mum: my 'Pit Crew'. She has been my biggest supporter throughout this whole thing, offering me words of encouragement when I was at my lowest, supporting me no matter what my decision, getting swept up in the whole experience - for taking care of things back home for me and for being THE Transcriber Extraordinaire. I love you Mum and I can't wait to see you in September. So, this is it for now. I will be journalling again next year, so stay tuned.Take care, have fun. To all those people considering doing something like this...it may be hiking, it may not, I have one thing to say to you...(to steal a marketing phrase of a multi-national company): Just Do It!Remember, it's all part of the experience...the good, the bad and the ugly.