Date: 2003-09-11
To: View Entry
Miles today: 0.0

For some time I've felt i need some closure, as far as this trailjournal goes. I wanna start out by thanking anyone and everyone who read my journal, looked at a picture and followed along with my journey. These pages can be addictive, and I know since I was once a dreamer (and still am) fantasizing about being where the journalists were. A lot of my interest and motivation for the AT was spurred by reading journals the past 5 or so years.   Not a day goes by where I don't think about my trip. Sometimes not a minute or an hour goes by. I may be walking down the street or sitting in class and in pops these distinct memories of freezing, bundled up in a shelter in georgia, pressed next to the next person for body heat. I can remember descending down into the NOC, knees screaming and all, knowing that I had made a real friend in Dimples. I can remember being frustrated in Erwin by the snow and the bug that was being passed around to all, but also being inspired and amazed by the kindness of one Janet Hensley.    As my legs got stronger, so did the miles pass and more friends were made. Grunt and I established ourselves as long term partners and unfortunately we parted ways with Java and Dimps. I often replay the day we hiked over dragons tooth. We were treated to trail magic at rt 624, went on to hike through beautiful cow pastures and ended up eating the most divine meal i've ever gulped down (homeplace) and met a true trail angel by the name of Delwood Shecterly, a fellow i can never forget. From there we slogged on, 4 more miles up to mcafee knob, as the sun was setting, something truely everyone should get a chance to experience.   I remember eating my way through the shenendoahs and again, not seeing a bear. Rain, rain and more rain was the forecast for May and each day brought more promising and uncomfortable clothing, body parts and moldy gear. I can feel the pain i felt as Grunt, squirts and and I hobbled into Harpers Ferry after a 24 mile day, doing it just to say we were there. There was Duncannon, PA one town stop where i truly feel i rested, both my body and my mind. More rain continued as i ambled into my home turf and got a couple days in NY to "relax". Coming back to the Trail was extremely hard, and that night at fingerboard shelter i can remember feeling some anxiety about being back in the "woods". Southern New England was a blur do to our too big mile days (i guess attributed to the rainfall and lack there of views). It was a real special experience to walk a mile off the AT and into my summer camp, my home for the past 10 summers. To be able to see my friends and tell them that i had just walked from georgia was a wonderfully proud feeling i'll never forget.   Then there was my first night alone, atop Cooper Lodge, Killington. It was possibly the most relaxed evening i had and the mice were able to keep me on my toes.    One memory that sticks out greatly is the dread i felt on the morning of the 25th of June. Dread not of the looming mountain above us (moosilauke) but of the realization that I would be losing the great companionship of my dear buddies, most of whom i had walked with from georgia. Watching them walk off together down the trail, made me want to jump out of the car and chase them up the hill. Coming back alone, seeing no other NOBOs for a week was tough, but an experience im glad i had. I was able to learn a lot about myself, and i had to go to my reserves. There was noone to motivate me to the top of the hill or to make the rain any easier. I did luckily have the spectacular views of the whites to keep me company, the hills that first inspired me to love the mountains and the AT.    I remember the day I walked into gorham in a freezing rain, alone, wanting to crawl in a hole and cry. Standing in the rain on the side of the road for 30 minutes shivering is a feeling i won't soon erase. The guy who picked me up can only be an angel. Never being happier to see Poptart, as the first thru-hiker i recognized in a long while. Hiking a ridiculous 16+ mile day thru and over the mahoosuc notch and range was one of the dumber things i did. I can remember arriving at baldplate lean-t0 ready for a zero week!    I struggled thru most of maine, due to some unidentified virus which made me really fatigued. Despite that, the beauty and companionship got me through. It was there that I became close with Team Iowa, 3 extrememly wonderful teachers who shared their love of baseball, music, and David Sedaris short stories with me. Slogging through feet of rain on the trail and dangerous river crossing with poptart and Train, made all of us stronger as well as saturated with water. I was never so happy to see Shaws when i crawled down the street in monson.    The Wilderness, although not very wildernessy, was beautiful, a fitting end to this long, strange but wonderful journey. Team Iowa, as well as PT, Train, the comical Ben and Witt and Sticky and Luke made my last few days glorious. We pushed ourselves a lot physically, with the end in sight (although not literally due to the damn fog and rain!) and kept each other going with jokes and talk of the infamous abol bridge store, chocked full of foods not in our dwindling food bags. The last couple days were more than i could have asked for. Chocked full of moose sightings, swimming opportunities and cool breezes and the occasional Katahdin sighting brought such a fitting end to the trip. Not being able to sleep at Hurd Brook shelter and getting up at 5am to get to the abol store was fun. Sitting around after drinking too much choclate milk, playing wiffle ball in the parking lot and being chased away by the owner. Finally being in Baxter, arriving all too soon at the birches and feeling the proudness of registering as a thru-hiker and meaning it. The 2am wake up was altogether accidental (i really just had to pee i swear) which turned into us climbing the mountain in pitch darkness. As my glasses fogged and i tried to follow the faint dying bulbs from our headlamps, i found myself wanting to slow things down. Was this really happening? What could i expect at the top? Was this even safe. The interesting and technical aspect of climbing boulders without light was certainly a chore. When I ascended the tableland as days first light was pertruding around Katahdin, i knew i had made the right decision to come up at this hour. The whole trip flashed before my eyes and mind as i made the finally ascent to the top. The rest i cannot comment on. You must truly experience it for yourself to understand. Let me just say that every mile, and rainstorm and cold night and black fly and heartache was worth it.   I've felt guilty about thinking so much about the trip and feeling like i need to "get over myself". But the truth is that its a wonderful chapter in my life, one that im proud of and want and should be able to revisit often. The AT is a part of me and it taught my young self that there is this need for adventure and excitement and travel in my life. It taught me what this scared, unsure 19 year old was capable of, something i could have learned in no classroom.    But most of all, the AT taught me about life, love and friendship. The people I met were the best part of the experience. Without the bonds I made, be them with hikers, hostel owners, towns people or trail angels, they all lead to my success and greater enhanced my experience. There are too many names to list, but you can be sure that if you told me about a water source, gave me a ride to town, told me i could keep going or even shared a pizza with me, that you were what made my experience.   I'm back in vermont now and know that the Long Trail is in my near future. I've already started day-hiking. The lifestyle of long-distance backpacking is in my blood and will forever be in my life-as will this AT experience.   I think about how I felt on the top of Max patch watching the sun go down in the presence of good friends. And then I ask myself if I would ever do this again? In a heart beat.   Best, A-Train GA-ME 03