Date: 2005-03-11
From: Fontana Dam

To: View Entry
Miles today: 0.0

Alright, I was hesitant to put this on trailjournals, but I found out several people were worried about me, so I wanted to post an update/explanation. I VERY TEMPORARILY got off the trail at Fontana Dam-don't worry-Heidi and I have already set up a return date (in a few days-I don't want to post exact dates for safety reasons) and getting off has made me want to get back to the AT even more-it's a scientific impossibility that I quit at this point, so no worries.There are several reasons we (Heidi and I made the decision together) got off-basically we were getting REALLY BAD weather reports from the Smokies-Heidi wanted to skip them (she's long distance hiking about half way, and therefore not as rigid as I've been-I'm a bit of a purist and God willing I get to Maine I want to have hiked past every blaze.) My ankle is also still in bad shape; hurt like hell when I put on my boots and pack, and was somehow injured in the first place walking through snow early last week. I honestly felt if I went into the snowy Smokies I would have injured myself to the point that I couldn't go on. Besides, it is NOT smart to hike into survival conditions (we were getting reports from Newfound GAP-a lower altitude than the 6000 foot mountain tops-of 18 degree mid-DAY temps, a foot of snow, and 30 MPH winds) without being fully able and prepared (pretty much asking for trouble going in w/ injured ankle) I also had two friends who didn't have alot of hiking experience and equipment coming to meet me for a couple days in the Smokies or just after the park-I knew these weren't conditions they should be hiking in. I guess the last line of reasoning was that we just would have been miserable-with wind chill, lows were expected below zero and the Smokies are HARD-after last week's snow encounter I know how much harder the hike would be with extreme weather (I hiked the Smokies 2 years ago.) So, we had a week's worth of bad weather reports and being a recent graduate (i.e. just plain broke) we couldn't afford to hole up at the Hike Inn until the weather passed. Mom and Dad came to bail us out on Tuesday. I felt really miserable going home-had a pit in my stomach letting me know I had made a huge mistake-but fate had a funny way of telling me I was just where I was supposed to be.The first, of course, was the horrible news about the stranded hikers, which let me know I had made the right decision for my friends' sake and probably my own. The conditions were obviously very dangerous and not conducive to a hiker with a bum ankle. Boomerang, our former hiking buddy was one of the hikers who came across the four stranded guys-wishing them all a quick recovery.The second happened the very next morning when I found out my grandmother, Nonie, had gone into congestive heart failure. She's now on life support in the ICU and doctors have had very grim expectations about her ability to recover. I'm leaving this afternoon for Baton Rouge to spend this time with my family. Death and sickness are always painful, but I learned three years ago when my sister-in-law/would be sister because she was in my life since I was six years old passed away that I can either be angry and inconsolable when faced with death, or I can be thankful for their part in my life and look for the good that can be found in even the worst situations. I'm thankful that I chose to go to LSU and spend three and a half years with my family and so sweet grandparents. I'm thankful that my Nonie has lived such a long, full life. And I'm thankful that I got off the AT just for this week, as much as I doubted myself and now miss it so much, so that I can be with my family now.No matter what happens in these next couple of days I WILL be back on the trail as soon as possible and as much as the Smokies might torture my already softening muscles, I'll get through them safely and with a big smile because I'll know I'm back where I belong!