Date: 2004-03-11
To: Almost there!
Miles today: 0.0

So, today I am in Florida, visiting the grandparents before I leave. I haven't made an entry to this journal in a very long time, not because I haven't had anything to say, but because the last minute prep has been so insane that I haven't had four seconds to spare.I had to leave for the airport at 8:15 yesterday morning. At 7:30 yesterday morning I was still putting the finishing touches on my final maildrops. I also got a really bad cold that left me doing more or less nothing but sleeping for a couple days last week, so I was really pushing it. Spent the last three days not sleeping at all to make up. And as I sit here in the BEAUTIFUL Florida weather, I'm still ripping apart guidebooks and seperating maps so I have the right stuff mailed to me at the right time. Booked my shuttle today, too. And the amazing thing is, through it all (and despite how much work I still had to do right up to the very last second), I wasn't stressed a bit. I wasn't worried. I'm still not. Life is... copasetic. I know for sure this is a reflection of the time spent preparing for this journey, since this time last year I would have reacted to my last minute situation in a very different way. As I'm sure I've said before and will say again before this trip is done, I have never been so happy. Life has never been so good, or perhaps I've simply not had my eyes open to see it.So, outside of the last minute insanity, some really really good things that have occured recently...I'm absolutely amazed at the kindness of strangers, and the goodwill of casual acquaintences and friends. I'd say I'm amazed at the kindness of close friends and family, but I'm not. Me and the people I love are good to eachother. Please don't think not being amazed by it makes their contributions any less spectacular. Because everyone's been so supportive - mom stayed up more or less all night with me for two nights to finish the drops. And when I left for the airport, I left her kitchen, living room and bedroom more or less decimated by a tornado. What an amazing woman. And when my partner and dear friend Patrick and his lady and dear friend Kate came to help me the night before I left, they sat me down to make sure I understood that, while they believe in me and in the fact that I can finish this journey, that they would also understand completely if I didn't. They wanted to be sure I knew there'd be no shame or dissapointment in anybody's eyes if I left the trail for any reason. I know that sounds so simple but it meant so much to me - not that they feel that way, because I all ready believed they felt that way, but that they took the time to tell me. And not just TELL me, but to really make certain I knew. I was so touched I cried. More now on the kindness of others...Saturday I had a little going away shindig. Nothing big, as I am typically heartily anti-social. A group of about a dozen people rotated in and out to play some $20 buy-in No Limit Texas Holdem. I finished $70 up on the night One of the boys who writes for my website (and who I consider a friend, even if we really never do anything together) really touched me with his parting gift that night. He writes a really obscure and semi-intellectual comic strip based loosely off the stylings of Pokey the Penguin. He'd dedicated a strip to my thru-hike, and printed out a copy for me to carry with me. For the curious, you can see the strip at http://www.angelfire.com/comics/grandpawerewolf/20.html Please don't expect it to make any sense, because it doesn't. But it is funny, if you're into that sort of thing. Read the first strip in the archive if you wish to know the meaning of "time occurs". A lot of the other regulars in my store filtered in and out that night giving hugs and farewells and good lucks. It was actually a little overwhelming - I hadn't expected too many people to really notice I was gone. As it turns out, I think a whole lot of them will be reading this journal, which makes me a little more self-conscious in my musings than I had originally intended to be. I've also very recently (last week, actually) been introduced a really fantastic guy by the comic strip writer, who came and played poker with me and who has shared many entertaining chats with me over the course of the past week. He has the most wonderful voice, and when he sings I just close my eyes and let it wash over me. In theme with how amazing I'm discovering people can be, he is recording a song for me on my MP3 player to take with me on my trip.More amazing stuff... So, I'm writing this novel. I have been for a while, and I'm about 400 pages into it right now. I intend to finish it on the trail, barring some overpowering urge to write time-consuming manifestos :P Despite it's incompleteness, I feel the work has reached the stage where it could really benefit from beta readers, and I've hesitantly begun to release it into the hands of people I trust. So, (this is a long story, skip to the next paragraph if you'd like) nine years ago when I was a senior in high school, I had the most spectacular teacher for AP Lit. The man's name is Gary Keck and he is easily one of the most wildly brilliant and creative people I've ever had the honor to share conversation with. Certainly the most influential teacher I've ever had. For those of you who don't know me, let me tell you now that if there was one thing in this world that I could do with myself and be the most happy and the most at peace, it would be to write professionally. In this vein, Mr. Keck gave me a most fantastic gift - he taught me that in all works of creativity (be it writing, or a philosophy or concept or even a structure of social interaction), there is a window through which one can view the creator's purpose and voice. So even if you're reading a work and it bores you to death, somewhere and somehow there is a way inside. You might not enjoy it, but at least you'll take something from it. In teaching me to find the voices of others, he taught me to find my own. I wish I could quantify this process somehow, as I know how vague and esoteric this whole thing sounds. I can't, nor can I explain it even to myself. But I know that, had it not been for that particular education, I'd still be floundering around on a keyboard, hoping to hit something meaningful and good. It is safe to say without any exaggeration, given how much it means to me to NOT be floundering, that this man quite profoundly changed my life. So, as the book winds down to completion, I had this fantasy of showing it to him, having him rip it apart with a red pen the way he used to do with my essays when I had him as a teacher, and then just talking about it for hours. Because it is a book that makes you think, and question. And I want to know what he thinks, and what he might question, and how he perceives its presentation. And what we can discover about it that I hadn't seen or been able to bring to conscious light on my own. So I finally work up the nerve to call him, and this past Monday I had my first Writing Lab in 9 years It was such a cathartic experience! We talked for over an hour. He said he was honored that I wanted to share it with him. He'd all ready figured out why I was coming, even though I'd been very careful not to say anything (I was so nervous going in that I thought if I said anything at all I'd just lose my nerve). Anyway, it was really special. Some more amazing... it seems I have a fan club! I am being silly here, of course, but I'm discovering there are lots of people following this journal (sorry for being so long-winded last paragraph, to those of you who are slogging through it), and that so many of them are so kind! It's such a refreshing view of the world, going from typical northeastern "hospitality" to having someone offer you a space in their hotel room when you fly to Atlanta, or having someone ask for your maildrop list so they can send you treats, especially when you've never spoken or met! It makes me look all the more forward to getting on the trail in five days, to think that such kindness is the prevailing attitude amongst the hikers. For someone who started out being pretty sure she wanted to do this journey alone, I'm starting to think I'm gonna want to spend at least my first several nights with as many other hikers as possible. I look forward to sitting around whatever passes for a campfire these days, sharing a meal and some good stories. Well, this entry's getting really long and the library lady is ready to kick me off. So, till next time! You'll hear from me soon.Happy trails, all.