Date: 2003-07-26
From: Port Clinton, PA

To: Eckville Shelter
Miles today: 15.2
Weather: scattered clouds

Happy birthday to my fabu younger brother!! I know it will be belated by the time this is posted, so I hope you had a great day, Doug! Know that I was thinking of you... Today was a day of decision-making for me. I was currently in town with everyone I'd been hiking with for the past month, but I knew that Reason, Cruiser, VSA and the Dude were taking a zero day, then doing a 15 mile slack pack, picking up their packs and continuing on for another 7 miles. Randy and Gerri were going 15 miles today. I didn't know what I was going to do... I woke up fairly early, and felt pretty good...sleeping on a couch at the pavilion apparently worked for me. It wasn't completely enclosed, so I had plenty of air, and the couch was very comfy. I needed to do laundry and go to the post office today before I did anything, so I got my dirty clothes together. We were also meeting Jess, Mrs. Dutch, for lunch today...a busy day. I heard someone awakening in the corner, and I looked over to see Reason and Cruiser...they must have come in late. They didn't come down to the bar, but were there when we came back...it was so dark, though, I didn't realize it !was them. I went over to talk to Reason, who was awake. I told him about my indecision. I didn't know whether I could do the 22 mile day, as the 24 I'd just done had nearly done my feet in. Also, as much as I love Reason and Cruiser, being with them makes me feel lonely. He said something to the effect of "you mean, being with the annoyingly cuddly couple?" It's not that it's annoying for me...I'm so happy that they found each other out here...I just feel lonely. I've figured out, though, that it doesn't matter who I'm hiking with, really, I often feel that way. I told Reason that I would probably head out today, but I didn't know where I'd go. I went up to the post office, while the others went to breakfast in the opposite direction. I worried that I would miss the P.O. if I went to breakfast. I dropped my laundry at the hotel, which wasn't open yet, and went to the post office. My mail drop was there, and the woman working the counter told me that there were h!omemade cookies in the hiker box that someone had left there, as they couldn't carry them...breakfast! I mailed the box top back home...it had gone to my family reunion and had signatures from everyone, as well as artwork from my nieces and nephews...I couldn't just throw that out! I went through the box, put a couple of things in the hiker box, then went outside, where there were a couple of hikers going through their stuff on the curb. They were Vast Horizon and Lost Dog...two hikers that IB had told me about...they were flying through the Trail, as they had just a short amount of time to do it. We talked for a bit, then I went back to the pavilion. I sorted my food into my food bag. A guy came up and started talking to us...his name was Bag of Tricks, a Trail Angel. He was telling us about the Trail ahead, and then said that he could slack pack us to the Eckville Shelter, which was 15 miles away. I thought about it...it would be a way for me to get in the miles I needed, get everything done, have lunch with Jess and give my back a b!reak...I had some major chafing across the small of my back that was really hurting me. I decided it was the best thing for me to do. I gave him my food bag to bring ahead, then went to the hotel to take a shower and do laundry...I would need to get that done before I could give him my backpack. Maxine was working again today...she got me set up for both shower and laundry, and soon my stuff and I were all clean. I went to the bar to wait for Jess, Reason and Cruiser to arrive. Cruiser's cousins also were meeting us for lunch, and got there first. We went into the dining room and had a wonderful lunch...the portions there are humongous! It was so good to see Jess again...I hadn't seen her since Trail Days in Damascus. She updated us on how Dutch was doing, and we talked about how our hikes were going. Soon, it was time for me to get going...Bag of Tricks had arrived to pick up the rest of my things, and it was getting late. Even though I was slack packing, I still! had 15 miles to hike. Sage and Iceberg Slim were also doing the slack pack. As I was coming back from putting my bag in the car, I saw Molasses in front of the hotel. It was great to see her again...another not-since-Damascus person. She introduced me to Pushing Up Daisies, who I had heard about, but hadn't met before. She asked if she could hike with me, and I said sure. She got her things together, and I worked on rigging up the "brain" of my pack to work as a day pack. I said goodbye to everyone, and we set off. It was already after 3:00, I knew we'd have to make some good time if we were going to make it before dark. We had gone about 1.5 miles when Pushing Up Daisies started having an asthma attack. We stopped, and I asked if she had medication, which she did. She used her inhaler, but didn't seem to get much better. When she checked the packaging, it was one that had expired 4 months before. I suggested that she return to Port Clinton, as it would be better to take care of her health than hike, but she felt that if she turn!ed back, she would quit the Trail. I didn't want to cause her any more turmoil, and she said she could continue, so we did. About a half mile later, she was still having problems with her asthma, and said she needed to turn back. I waited with her till her breathing calmed down, and asked if she was okay to go back. She said she was, on the one hand, and not on the other. I told her I was really torn...I wanted to help her, but I also really felt like I needed to hike on. She told me I should go ahead. I did, but I didn't know if I made the right decision. I spent the next 6 or so miles questioning whether or not I'd done the right thing...whether I'm just not a good person...was I being completely selfish? Wasn't that what I came out here for, though? I spend so much of my life taking care of other people's needs, often at the expense of my own...I had promised myself that I would take care of me out here. And how can anyone know the ways that I am following my !heart to Katahdin?...and that the strings that tie me to it are often cruel and relentless in their pull...they do not necessarily allow for others. Man, I am a complete mess... I caught up with Sage and Iceberg Slim at The Pulpit and they were able to talk with me about everything. I stayed with them for the rest of the day's hike...they are really good company, and are both from Massachusetts (yay!). We spent a long time at the Pinnacle, which had a great view, and talked with some section hikers. It was 7:30, and we still had five miles to go to the shelter...we needed to get hiking! We went really quickly, did the miles in just an hour and a half, but we were in the dark for the last 20 minutes. Sage was the only one who had brought his headlamp, so we crowded around him to make it there. Eckville Shelter has a fridge with goodies, I had two sodas and an ice cream sandwich for dinner. Then I went to bed in one of the bunks in the shelter...I knew the bugs would get me, but I just had no ambition to cook dinner, let alone set up my tent. Shamrock was there and told me that Pushing Up Daisies had come to get her pack, and was feeling better. That made me feel better, and I was able to hit the hay...