Date: 2008-06-04
From: just south of Sky Meadows State Park

To: on high point after VA 605
Miles today: 10.5

Day 83 -- It thunderstormed last night-woke me up around 1 a.m. I woke up again around 6:00 and tried to get things moving, but to no avail. Even once we were all awake we sat around talking and hanging out. We didn't get out of camp until 1:30 p.m. A few miles into the day the sky darkened fast and thunderstormed on us. We tried out ponchos Wrongway had picked up. Verdict: they kinda work, they're hot, especially on the uphills. I think in the hot weather I'd rather just be wet and have that cool me down. By the time we reached Rod Hollow Shelter for lunch it had stopped raining. After lunch started the roller coaster--infamous for its constant 500 foot-ish ups and downs that go from there to Bear's Den, about ten miles worth. It thunderstormed twice on us again before we set up camp on the top of one of the hills, since it was almost dark and going to storm again. We were pretty much wet from start to finish today, and it was the first time in a while I got caught in that kind of torrential downpour.Although I would've been fine pushing on and night hiking the last few miles to the shelter, I'm glad to be in dry clothes in camp. Today was just one of those days, you know? I just woke up in one of those moods coupled with being tired. I wasn't in a bad mood, it was one of those moods where things that one is usually patient or laid back about irks you. OK, let me back up. In the summer of '06 I hiked the Long Trail (LT) in Vermont. During that hike I recognized how go-go-go I am. I like to be busy; I like to keep moving. I like to just hang out, but sometimes I get anxious getting going, not cutting things close time-wise, just keeping moving in general. Sometimes I have a hard time just sitting around, just being. I really came to realize this during that hike and have been working on chilling out and being less uptight. I've been working on "wasting time gracefully' as my friend, Phil, says. So, I've been making great strides at being more laid back, and on this hike, on this journey, I'm surrounded by people who have that influence on me, which helps tremendously. And before I started this adventure, one thing I told myself was that I didn't want to rush through it. I wanted to keep a good pace to get me to Katahdin at a reasonable date, but I wanted to see the views. I want to take a zero at a shelter to read or enjoy a swimming hole, and I want to take advantage of side trails, waysides, or ice cream stands. I want to sit and watch a deer eat or a lizard do its thing. Ok, now I'm rambling...my point is that I know how I am and am making a conscious effort to relax. Well, today, for some reason I just couldn't chill about anything...I tried--I took deep breaths, and I prayed, but I was just not having any of it. In the morning I just wanted to get up and go. At lunch I just wanted to eat and go (we were there for two hours). Once we were hiking I just wanted to go, but my friend's camera lens was stuck and we spent a lot of time stopped trying to fix it. These things usually don't bother me. So, we left late--oh well. We really needed the sleep. Lunch took longer than usual--it was a needed rest. All these things contributed to not making it to the shelter--oh well, we all have tents. (Aside: I am very goal oriented, too. I've been working on this mindset --intentionally making part of my end goal to be enjoying the journey itself, the here and now.) Anyway, today, for some reason (probably being tired and emotionally drained) I just didn't have the strength to fight the anxiety and so all I could think of was being behind and not getting to our goal. Now I'm not saying that being determined and goal oriented are bad things, but I think sometimes I need to just tone it down and chill out. And my frustration came today when I couldn't seem to muster the energy to. Enough insight into Peanut--good night.