Newsgroup: it.hobby.umorismo
Titolo: 60 cose strane da fare in ascensore

                  60 Fun Things to Do in an Elevator
   1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
   2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to
      other passengers.
   3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering:
      "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
   4. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World"
      incessantly.
   5. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
   6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the
      elevator.
   7. Shave.
   8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask:
      "Got enough air in there?"
   9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator.  Wear yours
      upside-down.
  10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall,
      without getting off.
  11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors
      open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
  12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol
      coming!"
  13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and
      ask them to call you Admiral.
  14. One word: Flatulence!
  15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay
      open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go
      "plink" at the bottom.
  16. Do Tai Chi exercises.
  17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then
      announce: "I've got new socks on!"
  18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not
      now, damn motion sickness!"
  19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.
  20. Meow occasionally.
  21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
  22. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"
  23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
  24. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
  25. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
  26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
  27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one
      of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
  28. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
  29. Leave a box between the doors.
  30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for
      them.
  31. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through"
      it.
  32. Start a sing-along.
  33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your
      beeper?"
  34. Play the harmonica.
  35. Shadow box.
  36. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
  37. Lean against the button panel.
  38. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
  39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
  40. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the
      other passengers that this is your "personal space."
  41. Bring a chair along.
  42. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see
      wha in muh mouf?"
  43. Blow spit bubbles.
  44. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
  45. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host
      body."
  46. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
  47. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
  48. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at the passengers.
  49. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
  50. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
  51. Bring a water pistol.  Soak everyone's shoes.
  52. Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming
      "Aaughh!  Get them off!"
  53. Challenge your neighbor to a "Tic-Tac-Toe" tournament.
  54. Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other
      passengers like they are crazy.
  55. Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and
      wearing only a bath robe.  Mutter something about how
      husbands/wives always come home early just when it's getting to
      the good part.
  56. Make chalk drawings on the walls.
  57. As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting
      "Down!  I said down, dammit!"
  58. Crouch in one corner and growl menacingly at everyone who gets
      on.
  59. Try to get a game of "Twister" going.
  60. Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly.  Sniff at your
      neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step
      away.
-- 
Andrea The Troll Meneghini
Un esperto e' una persona che, evitando tutti i piccoli
errori, punta direttamente alla catastrofe. 
Definizione di Weinberg


Lo so che rompo... ma non sarebbe possibile postare la traduzione ...
visto che siamo si IT (che e' l'abbreviazione di
italiano).HOBBY.Umorismo.
Pero' a dire la verita' siamo in Europa, HOBBY e' inglese ... e quindi
e' giusto postare anche in inglese....
Bie Bie
P.S. A quando la versione in portoghese (magari tradotta da
Altavista?)