Newsgroup: it.hobby.umorismo
Titolo: Computer humour (in inglese)

Da "Unix Humour"
http://www.geocities.com/SiliconValley/Vista/8009/index1.html
Diary of an AOL User.
July 18 -
     I just tried to connect to America Online. I've heard it is the
best online service I can get. They even included a free disk! I'd
better hold onto it incase they
     don't ever send me another one! I can't connect. I don't know
what is wrong. 
July 19 -
     Some guy at the tech support center says my computer needs a
modem. I don't see why. He's just trying to cheat me. How dumb does he
think I am? 
July 22 -
     I bought the modem. I couldn't figure out where it goes. It
wouldn't fit in the monitor or the printer. I'm confused. 
July 23 -
     I finally got the modem in and hooked up. that nine year old next
door did it for me. But it still don't work. I cant get online. 
July 25 -
     That nine year old kid next door hooked me up to America Online
for me. He's so smart. I told the kid he was a prodigy. But he says
that's just another
     service. What a modest kid. He's so smart and he does these
services for people. Anyway he's smarter then the jerks who sold me
the modem. They didn't
     even tell me about communications software. Bet they didn't know.
And why do they put two telephone jack holes in the back of a modem
when you only
     need one? And why do they have one labeled phone when you are not
suppose to hook it to the phone jack on the wall? I thought the dial
tone sounded
     funny! Boy, are modem makers dumb! But the kid figured it out by
the sound. 
July 26 -
     What's the internet? I thought I was on America Online. Not this
internet thing. I'm confused. 
July 27 -
     The nine year old kid next door showed me how to use this America
Online stuff. I told him he must be a genius. He says that he is
compared to me. Maybe
     he's not so modest after all. 
July 28 -
     I tried to use chat today. I tried to talk into my computer but
nothing happened. maybe I need to buy a microphone. 
July 29 -
     I found this thing called usenet. I got out of it because I'm
connected to America Online not usenet. 
July 30 -
     These people in this usenet thing keep using capital letters. How
do they do that? I never figured out how to type capital letters.
Maybe they have a different
     type of keyboard. 
JULY 31 -
     I CALLED THE COMPUTER MAKER I BOUGHT IT FROM TO COMPLAIN ABOUT
NOT HAVING A CAPITOL LETTER KEY. THE TECH
     SUPPORT GUY SAID IT WAS THIS CAPS LOCK KEY. WHY DIDN'T THEY SPELL
IT OUT? I TOLD HIM I GOT A CHEAP KEYBOARD
     AND WANTED A BETTER ONE. AND ONE OF MY SHIFT KEYS ISNT THE SAME
SIZE AS THE OTHER. HE SAID THATS A STANDARD. I
     TOLD HIM I DIDN'T WANT A STANDARD KEYBOARD BUT ANOTHER BRAND. I
MUST HAVE HAD AN IMPORTANT COMPLAINT
     BECAUSE I HEARD HIM TELL THE OTHER SUPPORT GUYS TO LISTEN IN ON
OUR CONVERSATION. 
AUGUST 1 -
     I FOUND THIS THING CALLED THE USENET ORACLE. IT SAYS THAT IT CAN
ANSWER ANY QUESTIONS I ASK IT. I SENT IT 44
     SEPARATE QUESTIONS ABOUT THE INTERNET. I HOPE IT RESPONDS SOON. 
AUGUST 2 -
     I FOUND A GROUP CALLED REC.HUMOR. I DECIDED TO POST THIS JOKE
ABOUT THE CHICKEN THAT CROSSED THE ROAD. TO
     GET TO THE OTHER SIDE! HA! HA! I WASNT SURE I POSTED IT RIGHT SO
I POSTED IT 56 MORE TIMES. 
AUGUST 3 -
     I KEEP HEARING ABOUT THE WORLD WIDE WEB. I DON'T NOW SPIDERS GREW
THAT LARGE. 
AUGUST 4 -
     THE ORACLE RESPONDED TO MY QUESTIONS TODAY. GEEZ IT WAS RUDE. I
WAS SO ANGRY THAT I POSTED AN ANGRY
     MESSAGE ABOUT IT TO REC.HUMOR.ORACLE. I WASNT SURE IF I POSTED
RIGHT SO I POSTED IT 22 MORE TIMES. 
AUGUST 5 -
     SOMEONE TOLD ME TO READ THE FAQ. GEEZ THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO USE
PROFANITY. 
AUGUST 6 -
     SOMEONE ELSE TOLD ME TO STOP SHOUTING IN ALL MY MESSAGES. WHAT A
STUPID JERK. IM NOT SHOUTING! IM NOT EVEN
     TALKING! JUST TYPING! HOW CAN THEY LET THESE RUDE JERKS GO ON THE
INTERNET? 
August 7 -
     Why have a Caps Lock key if you're not suppose to use it? Its
probably an extra feature that costs more money. 
August 8 -
     I just read this post called make money fast. I'm so exited. I'm
going to make lots of money. I followed his instructions and posted it
to every newsgroup I
     could find. 
August 9 -
     I just made my signature file. Its only 6 pages long. I will have
to work on it some more. 
August 10 -
     I just looked at a group called alt.aol.sucks. I read a few posts
and I really believe that aol should be wiped off the face of the
earth. I wonder what an aol is. 
August 11 -
     I was asking where to find some information about something. Some
guy told me to check out 
ftp.netcom.com
. I've looked and looked but I
can't find that
     group. 
August 12 -
     I sent a post to every usenet group on the Internet asking where
the 
ftp.netcom.com
 is. hopefully someone will help. I cant ask the kid
next door. His parents
     said that when he comes back from my house he's laughing so hard
he can't eat or sleep or do his homework. So they wont let him come
over anymore. I do
     have a great sense of humor. I don't know why the rec.humor group
didn't like my chicken joke. Maybe they only like dirty stuff. Some
people sent me posts
     about my 56 posts of the joke and they used bad words. 
August 13 -
     I sent another post to every usenet group on the Internet asking
where the 
ftp.netcom.com
 is. I had forgot yesterday to include my new
signature file which is
     only 8 pages long. I know everyone will want to read my favorite
poem so I included it. I'm also going to add that short story I like. 
August 14 -
     Some guy suspended my account because of what I was doing. I told
him I don't have an account at his bank. He's so dumb.

Diary of an AOL User.
<cuttone>
ROTFL!!!
non so perche' ma mi ricorda tanto qualcuno... mah!
L'Aura
-----------------------------------
 ... e l'ultimo... chiuda la porta!
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Dici?
Ciao,
Rick


Hai avuto anche tu la stessa sensazione?


 
Come un dejà vu.
Ciao,
Rick