Newsgroup: it.arti.musica.classica
Titolo: The Death of Classical Music

http://www.classicalarchives.com/articles/edwards006.html
http://www.classicalarchives.com/articles/edwards007.html
http://www.classicalarchives.com/articles/edwards008.html
http://www.classicalarchives.com/articles/edwards014.html
Now that music has reached such a state, can we even call it music? Or
is it now down on all fours with performance art? And since such
concept pieces require no musical talent whatsoever, I may as well
join in and offer a few suggestions for new masterpieces. I hereby
waive all copyrights and abjure any and all title, claim or
prerogative in the use of these ideas. I invite all the
composers-in-residence and other maestros to take these concepts and
run with them: 
A string quartet in which the players ruin their instruments by
performing underwater. An even more daring work may be achieved if the
players are also deprived of breathing apparatus. 
A piece for a brass ensemble in which the valves of the instruments
have had their pistons or rotors removed. The piece could be called
the "Incomplete Symphony." 
A piece in which the players are seated on wired metal chairs and
given painful electric shocks at random while they play. Alternately,
the audience may receive the shocks; in such a situation, no one would
want to attend such a performance, but that doesn't seem to be a
problem for any of the modern composers. 
The "Farewell Symphony" in which each of the players ingests poison at
the beginning of the piece. The last player who manages to produce a
sound on his instrument is given the antidote. 
An opera which improves on the pioneering work of Cage in that not
only is no music sounded, but no one appears on stage. 
"Toward the Unknown Region" in which both the orchestra and the
conductor wear blindfolds and headsets to block out all sound so that
none of them know what the others are doing. Of course, for this
concept to be truly effective, the audience must be blindfolded and
soundproofed as well. 
"The Concerto for Air Guitar"—neither the soloist or the orchestra
have instruments; they merely mime playing to the sounds of a
recording. 
"Role Reversal" in which the orchestra sits through the performance
thumbing through the program booklet. 
"The Aerobic Workout: a concerto grosso"—the soloists perform while
using treadmills and other exercise machines. 
"Da Capo"—all the musicians perform while standing on their heads.  

 sound on his instrument is given the antidote. 
Geniale... :)
un saluto,
Edward Elric

Se lo dice lui
http://www.sibeliusmusic.com/cgi-bin/user_page.pl?url=invictus
I'm a former diesel mechanic specializing in the old 6V-71 and 6V-92
engines. I also do minor electrical repairs. Call for a free estimate.
allora l'art est véritablement mort
 growl
  A.

> 
http://www.classicalarchives.com/articles/edwards008.html
il grande musicista Yo MaMa!  Conosco anche una barzelletta
musicale del genere "Yo Mama so fat..."
"Yo Mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo."
growl
 A.
PS: alcune delle sue performance in effetti sono interessanti,
       peccato che non sappia trovarci lui stesso un possibile
       significato.

Altri errori. E' sicuramente sbagliato definire Georg Friedrich Haas
un compositore tedesco.  E' austriaco, nato a Graz, e la sua musica
é decisamente un fenomeno austriaco.  Questo nonostante io stesso
lo ritenga sostanzialmente inconsistente e la sua musica un bidone
(in confronto a lui la sua concittadina Olga Neuwirth mi sembra un
genio di statura epocale).   Se uno viene a parlarmi di "decadenza"
della musica tedesca e mi cita Haas, francamente, si classifica da
solo per un critico alquanto povero.
 growl
  A.

 The "Farewell Symphony" in which each of the players ingests poison
ULP! Per un attimo avevo letto "Firewall Symphony" e mi 
stavo gia' chiedendo: a quando la "Router Symphony" ed il 
"Server Concerto" ?? :-)))))
-- 
=========================================
Marco Marcelli - Genova
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"Ci sono solo due cose infinite: l'Universo
e la stupidita' umana. Ma sul primo non
sono completamente sicuro" (A.Einstein)