Newsgroup: it.discussioni.litigi
Titolo: Test: are you some faggish canuck fag known under the unbelievably moronic nickname of "Ultracollect"?

ARE YOU A ULTRACOLLECT?
Take the Leonard Spears quiz and see for yourself.
1. Out walking one day in en empty field, you are approached by a small dog wagging its tail. It
walks up to you and licks your hand, and you notice that it has a collar round its neck and a
name and address tag. What do you do with it?
a) Take it home, give it something to eat and phone the number on its collar so that the owners
can come and collect it.
b) Take it round to the address yourself and return it to its owner.
c) Blow its brains out with both barrels of your shotgun because it was worrying your sheep.
Even though you don't have any sheep, you vicious heartless murdering twat.
2. A diseased sheep has died. What do you do with its rancid carcass after it has been lying
dead and rotting for four weeks?
a) Bury it after finding out what was wrong with it.
b) Burn it.
c) Scrape it up, stick it in a mincing machine and feed it to your cows with all the other shit
you feed them. You dirty fucking piece of scum.
3. As a dedicated animal-lover, what do you enjoy the most about God's creatures?
a) The way they so fascinating and there are so many different kinds.
b) Watching them at play because there's always something new to be seen.
c) The way they twitch when you've just slit their throats, and the way it makes you come in
your festering underpants to watch them die a slow, lingering death.
4. What treat do you give your children on their days off from school?
a) A trip to the cinema or the big football match.
b) A ride down to the seaside with all the family.
c) Take them off in your tractor to some remote field where you get them to wank you off or give
you a blow-job, you incest-ridden piece of donkey pox.
5. Why do you wear wellington boots all the time?
a) Because there's lots of mud and water where you live.
b) They are practical and keep your feet dry, and can easily be removed when you go into the
house.
c) For sticking the back legs of sheep down so they can't run away when you're fucking them up
the arse.
6. There is a tailback of some ten miles on the road. Why is this?
a) Because of a major accident which has happened further along the way.
b) Major roadworks.
c) Because you're at the fucking front, going at one mile an hour in your farting tractor,
billowing out diesel shite and polluting the air all around. And you won't fucking move over and
let everyone pass, will you? You fucking ignorant red-faced piece of wank.
7. It's an average working day. What do you wear?
a) A suit, collar and tie.
b) Work-issue overalls.
c) Wellies, a pair of shitty corduroy pants that were last washed in 1957, but they were good
enough for your grandfather so they're good enough for you, a rancid shirt, holey pullover,
disgusting jacket with deep pockets cos you're a tight-fisted fuck, and some smelly hat that's
spent most of the past ten years up against a cow's arse.
8. You are going for a posh night out somewhere. What do you wear?
a) Your best suit.
b) Casual clothes because they're more comfortable.
c) Wellies, a pair of shitty corduroy pants that were last washed in 1957, but they were good
enough for your grandfather so they're good enough for you, a rancid shirt, holey pullover,
disgusting jacket with deep pockets cos you're a tight-fisted fuck, and some smelly hat that's
spent most of the past ten years up against a cow's arse.
9. When your youngest child was born, what was the first thing you noticed about it?
a) That it was healthy and that everything was in order.
b) How much it looked like your wife.
c) That it had eighteen fingers, thirty-eight toes, one big eye in the middle of its forehead
and hair all down its back... just like the rest of your children. You genetically mutated twat.
10. What do you do with the vast pile of potatoes that you have stored round the back of your
house?
a) Bag them all up and give them local old folks homes and various charities.
b) Try and save as many as you can for next year.
c) Pour petrol over them and set fire to the fucking lot, laughing your bollocks off because
that'll put the prices up for next year. You grabbing fucking thieving cunt.
11. You want your children to have the best education possible. How do you make sure that they
get this?
a) By sending them off to the best private school you can afford.
b) By making sure that they have your total support in whatever they do - helping them with home
and course-work and in every way you can.
c) By dragging them bleary-eyed from their beds at three in the morning to do the milking, so
that they're zedding away like fuck all the way through lessons. And when they come home it's
fuck the homework and get that pig sty cleaned out, you lazy little bastard. While you fuck off
down the pub to plead poverty and cadge free drinks from all the other customers.
12. You find a pair of cute little sparrows nesting up in the roof of one of your sheds. What do
you do?
a) Watch them closely and enjoy them as they lay their eggs, nurture their young and eventually
say goodbye to yet another litter.
b) Nothing. leave them to it because it's all nature.
c) Blow the bastards away and steal the eggs, which you then sell to fucking stupid tourists
telling them they're home grown free range quail's eggs... and a snip at five bucks each. You
evil fucking greedy heartless bastard.
13. You notice that one of your chickens is limping. What do you do about this?
a) Take it inside and try to fix the leg yourself.
b) Take it to the vet to see if he can repair it, regardless of the cost to yourself.
c) Wring its fucking neck, pluck it and eat it for supper... unless of course you can flog it to
some old biddy in the village for fifteen bucks because it's free range, that is.
14. What was the first thing your father said to you about your future?
a) "One day all this will be yours, son."
b) "You must work hard and always be firm, fair and efficient."
c) "If you don't swallow next time I'll break your fucking neck, you little cunt."
15. Which of these would you like your eldest daughter to marry?
a) A rich man who will give her everything she wants.
b) A poor man who will give her all the love that she wants.
c) Her brother.
16. Describe your facial appearance.
a) Long face, clean shaven, good teeth and not bad looking.
b) Good looking, angular features, moustache and goatee beard.
c) Red, Very fucking red. Red as a fucking beetroot, you red faced fucking twat. Row of black
and broken teeth, grey stubble, hairs down your nose and out your fucking ears, and piggy little
eyes from closing them shut when you're wanking the bull off.
17. There's a fuel shortage on. What do you do?
a) Fill up your car and use it sparingly, walking whenever possible.
b) Nothing. You don't drive so it doesn't really concern you that much.
c) Guzzle the petrol station dry as you pull up in a wagon full of oil drums, then turn up in
your eight Land Rovers, four tractors, six old clapped out Morris Marinas and half a dozen quad
bikes, then march down to the local oil refinery and complain about the fuel shortage. You
hypocritical grabbing fucking red-faced cunt.
ANSWERS:
Mainly a: You're not Ultracollect.
Mainly b: Neither are you.
Mainly c: Well done. You're a fucking Canadian cunt alright. You grabbing piece of shit. With
your dirty smelly ways and your incest-ridden, pox-riddled family, you're as happy as a pig in
shit as long as you can fuck animals. You're a self-centred prig with all the sense of social
justice and decency of a great white shark. And you'd sell that as well if only you could get
your hands one some, though you'd probably tell people it was fucking fresh salmon. You rancid
money-grabbing faggish pussy homo SARS sick canuck turd.
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Cavo via l'xpost, solo per dirti che, pur non capendo un cazzo, mi fa molto
ridere "some faggish canuck fag".

 ridere "some faggish canuck fag".
Vai a leggere il test che aveva fatto lui (ultracollect) "Are you a Leonard Spears?" su
alt.cities.toronto, assolutamente risibile.
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