Newsgroup: it.fan.starwars
Titolo: Come scrivere un libro di SW (inglese)...

Scusate se posto questo articolo in inglese, ma l'ho appena ritrovato
e devo ancora trovare il tempo di tradurlo. Non e' nuovissimo, ha
almeno un anno e mezzo, pero' mi sembra abbastanza "vero"....
Bret and Dan's How to write a SW novel
How To REALLY Write a Star Wars Novel 
	Having read each and every Star Wars novel published, I have 
created a sure fire formula for writing a successful Star Wars novel.
I 
hope this helps all of you potiential writers in completing a 
bestselling novel.
1. One of our heros must loose his or her mind in one way or another.
A 
rational reason is optional. (Manic-Depressive Luke in Crystal Star,
Han 
an obsessive maniac in Courtship, Leia suddenly developing a multiple 
personality disorder in Crystal Star)
2. Dozens of new stereotypical and bland characters that no one cares 
about must be introduced, and 95% of the book must be written from
their 
viewpoint. This way the reader can complete the book in less than a
hour 
because they will skip all of the boring commentary.
3. A new villian must be introduced. There must be an outlandish
reason 
this villian was hidden throughout the movies, this usually falls in
the 
range of a deviously brilliant minority group.
4. The heros which toppled the Galactic Empire must be absolutely 
incompetent in fighting off this villian, and must be saved by one or 
more of the bland stereotypes described in #2. (It seems to me that a 
frontal lobotomy was necessary for all who are part of the New
Republic)
5. Something makes the Force go away.
 
6. Luke must be an absolute weenie who is completely incapable of a 
rational decision, even if he is a Jedi master.
7. The heros must not, repeat NOT say or do anything that is in 
character, except for the case in number eight.
8. If you do choose to have the heros say something in character, it 
must be a direct quote from the movies. (An added bonus is to have a 
character misquote himself.)
9. Luke must have multiple flashbacks of Yoda, who must be misquoted.
10. There must be multiple permanent characters introduced who 
dissappear for no reason at the end of the novel.
11. A new moneymaking scheme must be created for Lando, who will 
mysteriously loose it before the next novel.
12. Luke gets a woman, who also disappears at the end for no reason.
13.  The villian must have some relationship with Moff Tarkin, The 
Emperor, Darth Vader or all three.
14. The book must end in a climactic, predictable, completely corny 
showdown which suspiciously ties up all the loose ends neatly.
15. The unchanging physical characteristics of characters in the novel
must change. (Apparently, Luke grew about a foot before the Corellian 
Trilogy, and Mara Jade's hair has a tendancy to change 
color.)However....
16. ...there must be no signs of aging for any of our heros. (By the 
Corellian trilogy, Han should be at least 45, maybe older, yet he has
no 
signs of gray. Funny, Harrison Ford does.)  
17. Luke must do an Obi-Wan or Yoda impression.
18. The Millennium Falcon must be wrecked, or at the very least the 
radar dish must be knocked off.
19. Although there was only one privately owned ship throughout the 
movies, each and every character must, for no explainable reason, have
their own personal ship.(Where exactly did the Lady Luck come from?
Why 
would a high ranking government offical like Leia own a small, mostly 
defenseless ship? She travelled on a Corvette in A New Hope.) 
20. The ignition of the lightsabers must be described as a snap-hiss.
Alcune cose effettivamente sono vere.... purtroppo.
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cor...@iperbole.bologna.it
  ICQ UIN : 13498484
Home-page : 
http://www.geocities.com/CapeCanaveral/Hangar/7917
"And all those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain."
"E tutti quei momenti andranno perduti nel tempo, come lacrime
nella pioggia" Roy Batty, Blade Runner							
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Ho letto con interesse ed attenzione i vari punti... Ma credo che
l'autore in questione abbia scritto una spece di "parodia" dei punti
cardine...
Secondo me č da leggere in chiave comica, nel senso che i punti mi
paiono volutamente "caricati" in senso ironico... Non pare anche a voi?
"The ignition of the lightsabers must be described as a snap-hiss." ..
Ma dai... č
questo un valido motivo per creare un buon racconto? hahhahah...
Perň č simpatico...!
Ciao!

-- 
<-> Bako'98 <->
ba...@galactica.it
http://members.xoom.com/bako75
http://welcome.to/Bespin
"Questa č l'arma dei cavalieri Jedi... Non č goffa o erratica Cone un
fulminatore... E' elegante invece, per tempi piů...civilizzati."  -Obi
Wan Kenobi-