A method for controlling a relay; wherein the relay comprises a movable anchor and a coil which is configured to exert a force onto the anchor subject to a coil current at a control port, in order to connect contacts of the relay; wherein the method comprises - applying, at a control time instant, a control signal to the control port for initiating a switch-off event or a switch-on event of the relay; wherein the control time instant depends on a previously determined control delay of the relay; - determining a temporal course (201, 202) of the coil current subject to the control signal; - detecting a disconnect time instant, at which the contacts of the relay disconnect, or a connect time instant, at which the contacts of the relay connect, based on a derivative (321, 302) of the temporal course (201, 202) of the coil current; and - the contacts of the relay are configured to enable or to disable an electrical connection between load ports of the relay; characterised by - updating the control delay based on the detected disconnect time instant or based on the detected connect time instant, wherein - an AC voltage is applied to the load ports; - the method comprises, determining a zero crossing time instant of the AC voltage, at which the AC voltage changes polarity; and - the method comprises, determining the control time instant based on the previously determined control delay and based on the zero crossing time instant and wherein - the method comprises, determining the control time instant as the zero crossing time instant minus the previously determined control delay and minus an offset; and - the offset depends on a degree of reliability, a statistical scatter, of the control delay. - applying, at a control time instant, a control signal to the control port for initiating a switch-off event or a switch-on event of the relay; wherein the control time instant depends on a previously determined control delay of the relay; - determining a temporal course (201, 202) of the coil current subject to the control signal; - detecting a disconnect time instant, at which the contacts of the relay disconnect, or a connect time instant, at which the contacts of the relay connect, based on a derivative (321, 302) of the temporal course (201, 202) of the coil current; and - the contacts of the relay are configured to enable or to disable an electrical connection between load ports of the relay; characterised by - updating the control delay based on the detected disconnect time instant or based on the detected connect time instant, wherein - an AC voltage is applied to the load ports; - the method comprises, determining a zero crossing time instant of the AC voltage, at which the AC voltage changes polarity; and - the method comprises, determining the control time instant based on the previously determined control delay and based on the zero crossing time instant and wherein - the method comprises, determining the control time instant as the zero crossing time instant minus the previously determined control delay and minus an offset; and - the offset depends on a degree of reliability, a statistical scatter, of the control delay. - the method comprises, determining the control time instant based on the previously determined control delay and based on the zero crossing time instant and wherein - the method comprises, determining the control time instant as the zero crossing time instant minus the previously determined control delay and minus an offset; and - the offset depends on a degree of reliability, a statistical scatter, of the control delay.