A device for collecting a stool sample, the device comprising: a) a body comprising a sample collection chamber bounded on a distal end by a penetrable seal and bounded on a proximal end by a septum, said septum comprising an aperture; b) a sampling rod comprising a proximal portion and a distal portion, said sampling rod adapted to fit through and seal said aperture when said distal portion is in said sample collection chamber, wherein said distal portion comprises: i) a tip at a distal end; and ii) a plurality of stacked coaxial frusta of cones to form a plurality of metering ridges, wherein the stacked coaxial frusta of cones are coaxial with a longitudinal axis of the sampling rod; and wherein a cap is attached to said proximal end of said sampling rod, wherein said cap is configured to engage a proximal end of said body; characterized in that - said penetrable seal is affixed to a recessed sealing surface of the distal end of the body and said penetrable seal being penetrable by a pipette tip or needle and the center of said penetrable seal being essentially coaxial with said aperture; - said sampling rod is a flexible sampling rod and said tip at said distal end is an asymmetrical beveled tip, said beveled tip having an apex at the circumference of the flexible sampling rod and configured to bend the flexible sampling rod away from collisions and/or to deflect collisions with an inserted pipette tip, needle, or other implement inserted through the penetrable seal into said sample chamber; and wherein said device further comprises c) a fecal sample suspension solution in said sample collection chamber, said fecal sample suspension solution comprising Tris buffer, bovine serum albumen, Tween-20, sodium azide, sodium chloride, EDTA, and gentamicin, preferably approximately 20 mM Tris (pH 7.4), 10% bovine serum albumen, 0.10% Tween-20, 0.095% sodium azide, 140 mM sodium chloride, 10 mM EDTA, and 15 μg/ml gentamicin, and wherein said sampling rod and said aperture are configured such that, when a sample of stool is collected using said sampling rod, insertion of said sampling rod through the aperture removes excess sample material from said distal portion of said sampling rod and leaves a metered sample of stool, preferably of approximately 20 milligrams, in said plurality of metering ridges. a) a body comprising a sample collection chamber bounded on a distal end by a penetrable seal and bounded on a proximal end by a septum, said septum comprising an aperture; b) a sampling rod comprising a proximal portion and a distal portion, said sampling rod adapted to fit through and seal said aperture when said distal portion is in said sample collection chamber, wherein said distal portion comprises: i) a tip at a distal end; and ii) a plurality of stacked coaxial frusta of cones to form a plurality of metering ridges, wherein the stacked coaxial frusta of cones are coaxial with a longitudinal axis of the sampling rod; and wherein a cap is attached to said proximal end of said sampling rod, wherein said cap is configured to engage a proximal end of said body; characterized in that - said penetrable seal is affixed to a recessed sealing surface of the distal end of the body and said penetrable seal being penetrable by a pipette tip or needle and the center of said penetrable seal being essentially coaxial with said aperture; - said sampling rod is a flexible sampling rod and said tip at said distal end is an asymmetrical beveled tip, said beveled tip having an apex at the circumference of the flexible sampling rod and configured to bend the flexible sampling rod away from collisions and/or to deflect collisions with an inserted pipette tip, needle, or other implement inserted through the penetrable seal into said sample chamber; and wherein said device further comprises i) a tip at a distal end; and ii) a plurality of stacked coaxial frusta of cones to form a plurality of metering ridges, wherein the stacked coaxial frusta of cones are coaxial with a longitudinal axis of the sampling rod; and wherein a cap is attached to said proximal end of said sampling rod, wherein said cap is configured to engage a proximal end of said body; - said penetrable seal is affixed to a recessed sealing surface of the distal end of the body and said penetrable seal being penetrable by a pipette tip or needle and the center of said penetrable seal being essentially coaxial with said aperture; - said sampling rod is a flexible sampling rod and said tip at said distal end is an asymmetrical beveled tip, said beveled tip having an apex at the circumference of the flexible sampling rod and configured to bend the flexible sampling rod away from collisions and/or to deflect collisions with an inserted pipette tip, needle, or other implement inserted through the penetrable seal into said sample chamber; c) a fecal sample suspension solution in said sample collection chamber, said fecal sample suspension solution comprising Tris buffer, bovine serum albumen, Tween-20, sodium azide, sodium chloride, EDTA, and gentamicin, preferably approximately 20 mM Tris (pH 7.4), 10% bovine serum albumen, 0.10% Tween-20, 0.095% sodium azide, 140 mM sodium chloride, 10 mM EDTA, and 15 μg/ml gentamicin, and wherein said sampling rod and said aperture are configured such that, when a sample of stool is collected using said sampling rod, insertion of said sampling rod through the aperture removes excess sample material from said distal portion of said sampling rod and leaves a metered sample of stool, preferably of approximately 20 milligrams, in said plurality of metering ridges.