Hello how may I help you? So I was told I hve $800 in late fees? That is correct lol you're a library! How is this even possible? You have returned 1,766 books late over the past 6 years I thought if it was a big deal, you wouldn't let me check out more books I'm afraid there is nothing I can do about the situation. I obviously don't have $800. Can't we just forget about this? No. And since you are getting aggressive I am adding 25 cents to your fee. Was that aggressive, though? That is another 25 cents Well it looks like I'm moving to Canada, then!