Hello how may I help you? I need to renew some books I have out right now. Sure, I would love to help! May I please have your account number? 098439085309. Thank you! It appears that you have 5 books checked out. Would you like to renew all of them today? Yes, I would like to renew each and every one. Great! Please be advised that there is a $0.05 charge for each online renewal. Also, it appears that you currently owe $175 in late fees. Would you like to pay your late fees in addition to your renewals today? What? That's outrageous! I don't remember ever returning any books late! It appears that the 5 books you have checked out are currently 207 weeks late. I would be happy to assist you in paying your late fees today! Whatever, I'll pay, just as long as you let me renew my books too. Here's my credit card number: 093243932. Thanks, I will process your payment immediately. I would also recommend our online Speed Reading classes to help you read quicker and avoid those costly fees!