What to do When Your Child Has a Nightmare?

Remember the many sleepless nights when you had to literally slept 3-hour intervals so you could feed your newborn baby? The bad news is that watching over your child and guarding for their wellbeing never really stops, even when they’ve graduated into sleeping independently in their very own cosy little bedroom. Toddlers can become severely affected by nightmare even before they develop a vocabulary range that’s sufficient enough to explain his or her experiences to you.

It does not change the fact that your child requires your love and comfort, even if it is 5 in the morning and you have work to go to work in 3 hours. The last thing any parent would want is to be sleep-deprived and clueless about what to do with a sobbing child who is clearly terrified about going back to bed.

Credit: Shutterstock

Behaviours to Look Out For

A distressed child is very vocal about being in pain, even if it is mentally self-inflicted. As dreams usually happen during the second half of the night, your toddler will probably complain about the event in the early hours just before dawn.

Besides sudden crying or wailing, other symptoms of a bad dream could include an unwillingness to part from a parent, shaking from terror and strong refusal to go back to bed.

These symptoms could also mean that your child is either physically ill or uncomfortable as well, which is why it is important that you attend to a child who suddenly cries out in the middle of the night as fast as you can.

Are Nightmares and Night Terrors the Same Thing?

Credit: Shutterstock

Simply put, a child having night terrors is still in a state of slumber, whereas a child recovering from a nightmare is fully awake. Night terrors usually affect children who are above the ages of 4 years old. When one is experiencing night terrors, he or she remains fast asleep but does not dream. At the same time, the sleeper also experiences severe agitation and may cry out in their sleep.

In some cases, a child which is suddenly shaken awake during a night terror episode will not be able to recognise anyone. Other traits include heavy sweating and a racing heartbeat.

Oddly enough, most children do not recall having night terrors when they wake up the next morning. Night terrors do not affect every growing child, and is less common compared to nightmares, as night terrors usually occur when a child is uneasy or stressed, usually due to change of schools or moving home.

This psychological problem also happens during the non-rapid eye movement (REM) stage of sleep, approximately within two hours after the child is sound asleep. Night terrors usually occur in boys and only 5% of all children reportedly suffer from night terrors.

On the other hand, nightmares only occur when the sleeper is deep in the REM state of slumber. Children between the ages of two and three are most susceptible to nightmares because their minds are at the most imaginative, and they also struggle with the ability to differentiate between the real world and fantasy.

Did I Cause the Nightmare?

Toddlers are especially easy to mould and impress. Typical causes of nightmares in a toddler include violent or scary
television programs
, stories or watching something upsetting happen right before his or her eyes.

A toddler who has just been separated from his or her parents may also be converting separation anxiety into a nightmare as well, even if said parents are only sleeping in the room next door.

The good news is that while toddlers can stress themselves into repeatedly having nightmares, this phenomenon is usually self-made and is not caused by something the parents has said or done.

What to do During a Nightmare

Credit: Shutterstock

Some parents prefer to let their children cry away protests during bedtime, especially when they refuse to go to bed or do not want to sleep in separate bedrooms. However, all parents are highly advised to console their children immediately, especially when they suddenly cry out in the middle of the night. If your toddler is too young to communicate with words, demonstrate your love with physical contact instead.

Physical reassurances like hugging, kissing and cuddling are especially important for toddlers who have just been stressed out and is feeling sad. Once the toddler is calm, you can then rub his or her back down until they fall asleep again. Some parents prefer to invite toddlers into their bedroom for a sleepover as well.

Although this could effectively help your toddler fall back into a deep sleep, repeatedly doing so could create a bad habit that will be hard to reverse. Remember that like teenagers, toddlers also love pushing boundaries just to see how much they can get away with before they get into trouble.

A popular alternative is to find a replacement guardian for your toddler as well, especially in the form of a teddy bear! Let your toddler pick out his or her favourite soft toy and make it a habit to let them fall asleep with their plush buddy every night. The smell, softness and familiarity of the childhood object will be sure to calm most kids down.

If your toddler’s nightmare was beast/monster-related, you might also want to make a great show of checking under the bed and in the cupboards for said vermin. The simple exercise of reminding your child that he or she is well-protected may be all they need to calm down and go back to bed.

Parents may also invest in a nightlight so your child will not feel completely alone and/or defenceless in a dark room. Another great idea is to keep their bedroom door open so they can hear the sounds of their parents bustling about the house as they fall back to sleep.

Every child is different, so do some trial and errors until you find the perfect security blanket for your child. The idea is that you want to provide as much love and comfort as you can, yet also encourage independence at the same time.
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If your child is old enough, you may also want to consider talking to them about their nightmare. However, do note that dwelling on the nightmare for too long can cause your toddler to relive the event again, thereby causing even more distress. If you really are curious about the nightmare plot, perhaps you could wait until the sun comes up for a more in-depth investigation.

At the same time, saying things like, “it’s just a dream” is also futile, as younger children won’t be able to tell the difference between fabricated dreams and actual reality. Instead, try other identifiable words such as, “It was just a TV/movie in your head,” or “It was just a story”.

Credit: babycenter.com

Can I Just Let Them Stay Awake?

Most nightmares usually end near dawn, which is why it’s tempting for a tired parent to just let their kid run about the house until it’s time for breakfast. However, it’s always best to encourage your child to try to sleep some more as you don’t want to upset their sleeping schedule or deal with a lethargic child later on in the day.

The sad truth is that all children will eventually experience nightmare frights, and while it is heartbreaking, there is nothing much you can do about it.

If you would like to lessen the likelihood of nightmares, try telling your children happy stories only or relive precious memories like birthdays and Christmas with your child just before he or she falls asleep. When something frightens your child, all you really can do is provide comfort and wait until the terror passes.

This article has been republished with permission from
Kiddy123

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'Soul-shattering' child abuse death in Japan has the nation weeping

In March this year, Japan faced a “soul-shattering” child abuse death case. The victim was a little girl, just five years old, named Yua Funato.

The little girl had not just been physically abused over months by her very own mother and step-father, but she had also been starved. In fact, her cause of death was linked to malnutrition.

A mother and her child mourn for Yua outside the apartment where she was abused for months. | Image: Reuters/screengrab.

Japanese Child Abuse Death: What Happened?

According to
The Japan Times,
Yudai Funato, 33, and his wife Yuri, 25, physically abused little Yua from January 2018 right until her death in March.

They also did not give her enough to eat. This led to her death on March 2 from sepsis, caused by pneumonia (triggered by malnutrition).

When she died, Yua weighed only 12 kg: the weight of a one-year-old.

The husband and wife were arrested back in March. But will it ever bring back this little innocent who is now an angel?

Japanese child abuse: The child had been battered and abused for months before her death.

‘Mama, I Will Make Myself Do Much Better…’

In a recent report by
Reuters
 news agency, more heart-breaking details about the little girl’s tortured life were revealed.

“
Mama, I will make myself do much, much better tomorrow than I did today, without being told by Papa and Mama, so please forgive me, please, I beg you, forgive me..
.”

This is what the little girl wrote in a notebook in which her stepfather forced her to do writing drills as punishment. Reportedly, the child’s parents kicked and beat her regularly. She did not get medical care despite her deteriorating condition.

Japanese Prime Minister Orders Loopholes in Child Welfare System to be Closed

Yua’s tragic death, which Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe has called “soul-crushing”, has forced the government to do some soul-searching.

On Friday 20 July, the government announced strict emergency measures that would “confirm the safety of all pre-schoolers, relying on the help of law enforcement officials, if necessary,” reports
Reuters.

“The government will work as one to create a society that protects the lives of children,” its top spokesman, Yoshihide Suga, told a news conference.

Loopholes in Japan’s child welfare services are being blamed for Yua’s abuse going unnoticed (or ignored) for so long.

Social Workers Knew of Abuse

Just three weeks before Yua’s death, the mother reportedly refused to allow welfare workers to visit their apartment in Tokyo.

Apparently, the workers did not insist on going through with their visit because the family wasn’t under official supervision anymore. They had moved to Tokyo from the western prefecture of Kagawa.

Dr Fujiko Yamada of the Japanese Medical Society on Child Abuse and Neglect, stated that welfare workers failed to notice signs of abuse the little girl was facing, even when they visited her.

Reportedly, when they lived in Kagawa, social workers took the little girl into protection twice after showing signs of abuse.

Last July, authorities handed the child back to her mother and stepfather under supervision. This included frequent observation by a doctor.

Every following month,
the doctor had alerted welfare workers to signs of physical abuse.
Yua had also said she didn’t want to go home,
a clear red flag,
say experts.

“I want to know why the authorities didn’t take any action,” Dr Yamada said. “How the words of the doctor, and Yua herself, could be taken so lightly is beyond comprehension.”

The welfare of Japanese children lies firmly in the hands of social workers, since kids there have no independent advocate or representation, unlike in other developed countries. However, now, with the pledge of the Japanese government to do more for children, we hope what happened to Yua is never repeated.

May you rest in peace, precious girl. You were too good for this cruel world. We hope your death has not been in vain, and that this never happens to another child, ever again.

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Sources:
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,
The Japan Times

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Family Holiday Guide: The Ultimate Travel Itinerary for a Trip to Desaru Coast

It is no secret that Malaysia’s brilliantly managed beaches and coastlines have become a coveted getaway spot for both local and international tourists.
Desaru Coast, especially, is growing in recognition as one of the ideal beachside destinations within Malaysia because of its beautiful blue beaches and much-anticipated tourism developments such as its family-friendly holiday resort area.

However, one of the main and most important highlights of Desaru Coast is that it is seemingly less crowded than other destinations in Malaysia, which equals better privacy for your family.

So, if you are looking to head down to Desaru Coast, here is a rundown of what you should know before you take that family trip.

What to do at Desaru Coast?

Enjoy family privacy at the beach

Located at the eastern tip of Peninsular Malaysia, Desaru Coast beaches are a haven for families wanting to spend some time amidst nature.

Its 17-kilometre palm-fringed coastline offers white sandy beaches where families are able to enjoy their own peaceful privacy with sunrise and sunset views. Furthermore, you will also find it to be a clean and unpolluted holiday spot due to careful maintenance.

Take your kids to the Adventure Waterpark Desaru Coast

Adventure Waterpark Desaru Coast is great for both adults and children. It has one of the biggest wave pools in the world, amazing rides, slides and attractions – you could opt to spend a whole day here.

There are five zones in the waterpark, all with its own unique offerings from Kids Ahoy with age-appropriate water play equipment and 13 different water slides for younger kids, to cruising down the 350-meter lazy Penawar River with the family.

For those looking for a thrill, we suggest checking out The Tempest which allows bigger kids who are at a minimum height of 122 centimetres. The Tempest has two high-energy funnels and ends with a 24-foot drop, while its 55-foot tube slide includes a funnel in the middle that will send you swirling before a splashdown!

Golf at the Els Club Desaru Coast

The Els Club Desaru Coast, a 45-hole golfing course, designed by four-time champion Ernie Els comes with a perfect backdrop of rolling valleys set against the South China Sea. The courses are built with The Three Nines, which are The Ridge, The Coast and The Lakes.

Meanwhile, the Ocean Course consists of 27-holes which are suited for all skill levels, while the adjoining luxury clubhouse houses a golf shop, casual dining restaurants, locker room facilities, private function rooms, viewing balconies, and a relaxed terrace. Apart from that, the facilities at the golf course also include GPS buggies.

Indulge in a food affair

You can find plenty of dining options here. Each of the resorts offers restaurants where you can indulge in buffets or a la carte options – some even have beachside dining for you to fully take in the tranquillity of Desaru Coast.

If you are craving a burger, River Grill at Adventure Waterpark Desaru Coast serves a deliciously juicy lamb patty burger and a crispy tender chicken burger with charcoal buns.

Juicy lamb patty burger and crispy tender chicken burger at Adventure Waterpark Desaru Coast

Over at the Big Easy Bar & Grill at Els Club Malaysia, diners will love the thali set, while Tumeric at Anantara Desaru Coast Resort & Villas serves bold, fresh flavours of Thai cuisine. We also recommend trying out the lamb shank at the Elephant & The Butterfly at Hard Rock Hotel Desaru Coast.

However, there are additional options for seafood restaurants further away from the Desaru Coast resort area if you are willing to explore.

Shop for limited edition souvenirs

Is a holiday ever complete without a few purchases?
The Rock, which is Hard Rock Hotel Desaru Coast’s merchandise outlet sells limited-edition souvenirs including tees, jackets, collectable pins and more. The hotel also has Hard Rock Roxtars which sells children’s plushies, and other exciting toys, as well as colourful sweet treats.

Meanwhile, the Seafarer’s Gift Shop at Adventure Waterpark Desaru Coast offers waterpark essentials such as wetsuits and other apparel.

Where to stay at Desaru Coast?

The Desaru Coast Destination Resort is the latest tourism attraction that is part of a plan to revamp the tourism landscape in Johor’s south-eastern resort.

Currently, there are four main resorts at Desaru Coast which you can opt to book a stay at.

Hard Rock Hotel Desaru Coast:
Located right beside Desaru Coast Adventure Waterpark, the hotel is just a short walk to the beach. There are various amenities here suited for a family stay, including a kids club where your little ones can take part in fun and educational activities. Additionally, the hotel offers a well-equipped fitness centre, state-of-the-art spa and an amazing lobby bar for a perfect night-cap, while their outdoor pool is fitted with a submerged sound system!

The Westin Desaru Coast Resort:
This five-star resort, which faces the beach, offers a spa, a family kids’ club, a fitness studio and an outdoor pool. There are various room types to choose from including sea view rooms and suites for larger families. As for dining options, the hotel has five outlets, inclusive of a beach bar and a lounge.

Anantara Desaru Coast Resort & Villas:
Choose between rooms with a wraparound balcony, Malaysian-style villa or a beachfront residence with a private pool. This beachside resort includes a Lagoon Pool, an Infinity Pool, as well as a Watersports Centre where you can try out sailing, paddling, windsurfing, or kite surfing. For some quiet time, Anantara houses a well-furnished library and a modern gym.

One&Only Desaru Coast:
With design inspiration based on local culture and history, the resort is located beside the beach is a short walk to Desaru Coast Riverside. The accommodation options are all inspired by nature and incorporate tropical elements, while the rooms are open, as well as airy.  It is also 500metres away from The Els Club (Ocean Course). Apart from swimming pools, the resort offers top-notch spa experiences and wellness programmes.

How to get to Desaru Coast?

Fun-filled family holiday at Desaru Coast

There are two ways you can get to Desaru Coast Hotel from Kuala Lumpur which is via road trip or by taking a flight.

Driving from Kuala Lumpur:
It will approximately take four hours via the North-South Expressway. It is recommended to start your drive early in the morning to avoid traffic jams in the city. One of the popular rest areas along the North-South Expressway is R&R Ayer Keroh where you will find a lot of options to eat, drink and stretch before you continue your drive to Desaru Coast.

Flight from Kuala Lumpur:
If you choose to take a flight, it will only take approximately one hour to fly from Kuala Lumpur to Senai International Airport. From there, you will have to embark for another hour to Desaru Coast which you can take by shuttle.

Don’t forget to pack these essentials!

When packing, it is always good to prepare a checklist especially for family trips – you would not want to miss out your kids’ essentials. So, here is a basic checklist you can start with:

Sunscreen

Hats

Swimsuits

Slippers (easier to walk on the beach with)

Sand toys & books (during beach relaxation days)

However, apart from the usual beach essentials, bear in mind two of the most important essentials currently are face masks and hand sanitiser – remember, always carry these two necessities with you as you practise social distancing and sanitise your hands at regular intervals.

More importantly, take time to explain these safety measures to your kids so that they are safe at all times.

Ready to take your trip? Visit
desarucoast.com
 for more information and book your stay!

Disclaimer: You are not allowed to share this article on any other website or on Facebook without providing proper credit and the original article link on
theAsianparent Malaysia
 website.

Baca juga:

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The 3-minute rule to create stronger bonds with kids according to a psychologist

When you think of bonding activities for parents and kids, you automatically think of many hours of playtime or meals together with your little ones. Indeed, creating that bond between parent and child is so important at many levels: love, security, communication are just a few of the connections that are established.

And as important as things like play and mealtimes together are, psychologists say that bonding between kids and their parents can also happen in as little as three minutes. Have you heard of the 3-minute rule, mums and dads?

The ‘3-minute’ Rule, according to a psychologist

As parents, we’re constantly “busy”, whether it is with taking care of our kids or working. Usually both… and some more.

If we’re working, that leaves us with even less precious time to spend with our kids. When we do get to finally spend time with them, are we fully present? Is there anything we’re missing out on?

There could be indeed something — and it could be the most
important
 part of your day.

According to Psychologist Nataliya Sirotich, head of the Center of Work with Children and Youth, there is a precious 3-minute ritual that not many parents perform with their child.

The rule of 3 minutes says that when you return home, you focus fully on your child for at least 3 minutes. And you have to do this without fail, every day.

It is a simple yet effective way that helps to improve family relations. By following this rule, Sirotich says that a child learns to be totally secure with parents. The child’s trust could even be carried on till they become teenagers.

Mums and dads, this may also be applicable if you have gone out of the house on chores like a department store.

Bonding Activities For Parent And Child: How To Manage These 3 Minutes Correctly?

It’s not simply just sharing that 3 minutes with your child. There are some important things to note, of course.

1. Position yourself at the same eye level

As you spend those 3 minutes in the presence of your child, ensure that you are at the same eye level as him or her.

Whether it’s sitting on a sofa or on the floor with your child standing or sitting down beside you, maintaining that same eye level is crucial.

Bonding activities for parent and child: a reminder to be at eye level with them. |  Source: File photo

2. Observe the 3-minute rule when picking your child up from school

This is especially important when you’re fetching your little one from the kindergarten. It’s been a while since you’ve seen them so why not just simply spend 3 minutes: hug them and gently ask them to share more about their day in school and what they did.

Don’t downplay the importance of small talk here because a child can feel as though they are not being heard if you don’t focus on them. The interactions you have with them are extremely important to them.

Your eager little ones can’t help but feel excited to share whatever that is going on in their minds when they see you, according to Sirotich. You are his/ her greatest friend!

Protip:
Follow up on what they tell you by asking specific questions about it. Never shrug them off.

3. What you should never do

You should never ignore fully focussing these 3 minutes on your child after a period of not being with them. When you don’t dedicate time to your child, they might stop placing importance on their own daily experiences.

It could come off to them as though you are disinterested and in the future, they could even grow up thinking that they should keep things to themselves.

3. Of course, don’t to take it literally

The ‘3-minute’ rule simply means taking the extra effort to
spend at least 3 minutes
 fully focused on  your child, so that they can tell you the most important things the moment they see you.

Credits: Pixabay

Bonding Activities For Parent and Child To Create Better Bond of Understanding

There are other things you can do to create a better bond with your child, according to
Psychologists
.

1. Engage in mutual interests with your child

The key here is letting them know that you are interested in spending time together with them and partaking in activities together. It could be as simple as playing a game, cooking or some DIY projects!

During this time, focus on them and being with them. Everything else can wait.

2. Letting your child know that they can always talk and confide in you

Mums and dads, it’s important to practice active listening when speaking with your child.

Besides just taking in what they have to say, your child needs to know that you have understood them perfectly. How will that benefit you in the long term?

They will grow up understanding your role as a figure of authority and a loving place for support. You can also be sure that they can count on you anytime if they have anything to say or reveal. What’s more, you can expect that this behaviour will most likely carry on in teen life.

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3. Be genuine, do away with the fake excitement

Sometimes, you might not identify with whatever your child may be expressing to you.

In your attempt to respond to your kid appropriately, the key is to always come from a genuine place. Kids are way smarter than you think. And some are able to catch on when you are faking it.

Protip:
 Revisit the conversation that they both of you have, as it reinforces in your child that you have indeed listened and took in what he or she said.

Consequences Of Ignoring Your Child

It doesn’t mean that if you don’t practice the 3 minute rule, you are ignoring your child. But not observing this 3 minute rule could manifest in other ways as your child grows older.

Cultivating a closed nature — they could withdraw into their own shell

You’re seen to be not with them in times of need and when they get older, they will find less reason to speak with you.

They could be reluctant or see no need to share important details of their lives with you.

The effects of paying extra attention to the little details are long-lasting. The key is always consistency and showing that you’re with your kids every step of the way.

Source:
Zeptha
,
American Psychological Association

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Respiratory Distress in Children

Respiratory distress means difficulty in breathing. There are many causes for this including lung and non-lung problems. The latter is rare. Having a blocked nose usually causes a mild problem and no real distress.

Being mildly breathless can be missed as your child may just be breathing fast or show mild in drawing of muscles around the Collar Bone, Chest Ribs and Upper Stomach Muscles. You may also notice flaring of their nostrils. All this will be more pronounced during play activity or exercise.

As it progresses there would be in drawing at rest. In more severe distress they would be unable to speak few words or cry intermittently only. In very young children and babies, they may not be able to feed and appear very sweaty. Once they start developing bluish lips and becoming restless, because of low oxygen levels, an emergency situation is developing.

The most common cause is a lung infection and the worst form of this would be pneumonia. Young children and babies can get viral bronchiolitis. Another common cause would be asthma. We should always think about a foreign body causing respiratory distress in children.

COVID-19 causes respiratory distress. However, we should be cautious about this as most childhood COVID-19 are asymptomatic. That means children with COVID-19 can be very well and so may spread the virus without realizing it.

Treatment would involve first identifying the cause. If you know your child has asthma, you can first try using the inhaler to relieve their problem. You should seek advice from your doctor if the problem is not getting better with whatever treatment you are giving or if their distress is getting worse.

On the way to the Emergency Department keep your child in a sitting position with the head tilted back to keep the airway open.

What are the signs of respiratory distress in a child?

Fast Breathing – Difficult to notice.
Use Best Judgement
. You know your child!

In Drawing Muscles – Maybe subtle and require observation

Flaring Nostrils – Especially significant if noticed at rest

Difficulty to drink milk (in babies)

Bluish lips – Danger sign

When should parents be concerned about their child’s breathing?

Above signs noticed at rest

Bluish lips

Is respiratory distress an emergency? Why do we need to go to Accident and Emergency immediately when we notice signs of respiratory distress in a child?

Usually, this problem will creep up on you. Sudden distress is usually a foreign body blocking the air tube.

Seek help early if there is distress. If asthmatic and no relief with medication, then seek help from Accident and Emergency immediately.

How parents can help a child with difficulty breathing?

Aside from inhalers in asthma, there’s very little you can do at home for Respiratory Distress. If you are not sure how to remove a foreign body, like doing the Heimlich manoeuvre then you should seek help.

Is it normal for a child to breathe fast when sick?

Aside from a fever, rapid breathing should be a cause of concern. If you have controlled the fever and still find your child distressed, you should seek help from your physician.

Source:
This article is written by
Dr Ganesarasa A/L Annarasa
,
Paediatrics – General
 of
Pantai Hospital Klang (PHK)

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A Guide To Which Foods Improve (and Hinder) Sperm Production

Singapore’s birth rate has been steadily declining over the past two decades and is at its
lowest for the past seven years
. While rising costs of raising children are one of the reasons why people aren’t having kids, fertility issues are an ongoing issue. Specifically, a man’s sperm quality could be the reason why you’re not conceiving.

A lot of things can affect your sperm quality like genetics or stress. One thing you can control is your diet.

Besides the benefits of helping you to lose weight and improve your energy levels, what you eat has a significant impact on improving how much sperm you produce, as well as quality.

While taking supplements like
Coenzyme Q10
 or
doing more exercise
 can improve male fertility, there has been recent evidence that shows your diet plays an important role in keeping your sperm healthy.

So how exactly does diet affect sperm quality?

How does diet affect sperm quality and which diets are best?

Image source: Pexels

It’s been found that when men have more sperm when they have healthy hearts.

A
recent study
 by Ana Cutillas-Tolín and her cohort found that men who ate according to the
Dietary Approaches to Stop Hypertension
 (DASH) diet had a higher sperm count and better semen quality compared to men who didn’t follow the DASH eating plan.

The DASH diet focuses on eating plenty of fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins. There aren’t specific items you should eat, but focuses on the number of servings you have for different categories. These include lean meat (like chicken or fish), nuts and legumes, dairy products, fruits, and vegetables.

The DASH diet is found to help lower hypertension and blood pressure because of the lower salt intake. A Mediterranean-style diet will also provide the same benefits.

While there aren’t any specific foods listed that you shouldn’t eat as part of the above diets, there are foods that are detrimental towards sperm count and quality.

What should you stop eating to improve sperm quality?

Image source: Pexels

Eating certain things can really impact your ability to conceive. If you aren’t conscientious about what you eat, then you will find your sperm count and quality to be lower than usual.

Alcohol lowers testosterone levels which affect
sperm production
. Another reason to cut back on the booze is weight management.

Avoid drinking canned drinks or eating a lot of sweets or chips as high sugar content can lead to obesity. Being overweight causes hormone levels to change and impact male fertility.

Organ meats contain a lot of cadmium, a mineral which is found to
kill sperm cells.
 Hold off from eating too much kueh chap or dishes where innards are plentiful.

Image source: Pixabay

Soy-based food has been found to lower sperm count. Although the exact reason why isn’t clear,
studies
 indicate that it’s because of higher estrogen, which affects hormonal balance.

Fruits and vegetables with pesticides contain bisphenol a (BPA). Similar to soy-based products, this mimics estrogen.

It’s worth noting that men with low sperm count are at risk of various health diseases. A
study
 found that men with less sperm were at increased risk of diabetes, stroke, and heart diseases.

“Infertile men are likely to have important coexisting health problems or risk factors that can impair quality of life and shorten their lives,” explained the lead investigator Dr. Alberto Ferlin.

These results imply male fertility plays an important role in your holistic health!

So now you’re familiar with the foods you should cut down on, what should eat more of to have better sperm quality?

Foods you should include more of in your diet

What you eat
 is one of the easiest things to control. Eating the right things can do wonders for your sperm quality, just as much as a bad diet can negatively impact your sperm production.

Look to include more of these foods for improved male fertility and better health overall.

Salmon

Image source: Pexels

Salmon is rich in omega-3 fatty acids. In particular, you’ll find docosahexaenoic acid (DHA) is plentiful amongst omega-3 compounds.

This fatty acid
helps sperm viability
.

In other words, it turns sperm from immature cells into more streamlined shape with a long tail that’s effective for swimming!
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Time to start eating more sushi!

Whole Grains

Image source: Pexels

Whole grains are commonly found in bread, brown rice, and oatmeal.

They’re rich in vitamin B-12 and antioxidants, which are essential to maintaining healthy levels of sperm.

They also contain a lot of fibre which removes excess estrogen.

Switch out your bread loaves for whole-grain varieties. Consider including more quinoa and sweetcorn in your diet as well.

Dark chocolate

Image source: Pixabay

Dark chocolate is great for your heart health because it’s rich in flavonoids, a type of antioxidant often found in fruits and veggies.

Additionally, it contains L-arginine, an amino acid that boosts sperm count.

As with all things good and tasty, eat in moderation!

Red meat

Image source: Pixabay

Lean beef and pork contain zinc which
improves sperm quality
.

Studies
 show that lower zinc levels are linked to lower male fertility.

Include enough protein in your diet to keep your sperm levels up.

Dark, Leafy Greens

Image source: Pixabay

Folate is another B vitamin that’s linked to sperm production.

Research
 indicates that low folate is linked to damaged sperm cells.

Eat more salad with leafy greens like spinach, lettuce, swiss chard, and arugula.

Don’t let what you eat get in the way of planning for a family!

Have any thoughts on how does diet affect sperm quality? Let us know below!

This article was republished with permission from theAsianparent Singapore.

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Parents, Here Is The Ultimate Potty Training Tips For Your Toddler

When your child reached a certain age, you might think it’s time to get him off using diapers on daily basis and start to use potty. You will start doing your research on potty training tips, which potty to buy, or even perhaps how to teach him to say he wants to use it.

The problems with potty training are myriad and even on completion, you are not sure whether your child is truly trained as there could be relapses and regressions.

In fact, it is one continuing battle between the parent and the child till final learning is achieved. As my three years old put it, “Have patience mama, it’s a virtue and will help you achieve anything, even teaching me to use the potty.”

Now, before you feel discouraged by the idea of potty training (no matter how hard it would be!), we have some potty training tips all parents must try:

Step 1: Assess his readiness to start using the potty

This is very essential and many parents make the mistake of pushing their child too early, only to face the music later.

Believe me, toddlers can be stubborn and you need to cajole them into accepting this new routine. No amount of
anger
 or frustration will help get them to use their potty.

It would do you good to remember that all children are different. So, potty training ages would also differ from one child to the other.

Step 2: G
et a good potty, which is comfortable and liked by your child

If possible, have your child select his or her potty as this will help in the long run. I know this might sound silly to you but believe me when I tell you that some toddlers are very specific as to the kind of potty they want and will use.

I remember a niece of mine who made a living hell for my sister when she insisted on peeing only in a pink potty. My sister was travelling at that time and forgot to bring her usual potty so she settled for one from the local store.

However, my niece was not buying it — no amount of cajoling helped as she continued to pee and poop in her diapers. Only when my cousin got her another pink potty, similar to the one she used at home, did she get onto the potty again.

Step 3: Create a routine where the toddler uses the potty to get himself/herself familiarized with the process

You could start by placing your toddler fully
clothed
 on the potty while explaining the process. Ideally, this should be done at a time when you know your toddler is most likely to have bowel movements.

Make sure that he or she is really comfortable. You can place it in the living room or anywhere outdoors initially.

Later, of course, you can both remove the diaper when the child is ready and also move to the bathroom.

Training pants are a good addition at this point as they help you in your endeavour

However, at all stages, be ready for relapse or regression to earlier behaviour and be sure to treat the situation calmly. Additionally, if there are any accidents, handle them calmly and never make it an issue.

Remember you should
never
make potty training a power struggle issue as this will make your child rebel against it and will not help you attain final success.

Always remember that day and night training does not happen simultaneously.
 So, it would help to train your toddler during the day before you try night training.

Last but not the least, it is important to understand that potty training for peeing and pooping also happens at different stages.

Good luck!

Disclaimer: You are not allowed to share this article on any other website or Facebook without providing proper credit and the original article link on
theAsianparent Malaysia website

Read more:

What is infant potty training and how do you do it?

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How to Have a Positive Mindset

Stress and worldly issues can certainly play a toll on one’s feelings and emotions. They can make an individual feel worthless, lost, and lonely. Feeling as if no one’s on their side and no one understands them. However, that is most certainly not the case as it’s just our emotions causing us to feel as such. To aid those of you who may have fallen into this pit of despair, we’ve provided several steps that you can perhaps consider in your road to gaining a personal positive mindset.

1. Think of God

For those of you who are religious or you might not be a devote worshipper but you still follow the practices of a certain religion, always keep in mind that God doesn’t test his worshippers beyond their limitations. If you think that you’re being tested more than those around you, that’s just because you can’t see how God tests them. No two people face the same obstacles in life. Each individual has to face their own problems and so trust in God to help you see through this tumultuous period of your life.

2. Learn from failures

Who here hasn’t failed before? Everyone has definitely experienced failure in their lives. Some may fail academically, others fail relationship-wise, and there are those that fail in their professional lives. But just because you fail in one aspect, doesn’t mean that the failure is permanent. As long as you’re willing to look at the failure as a learning opportunity that will help you to better yourself (for that’s exactly what it is) then you can certainly bounce back from it.

3. Compare yourself with others

You might have heard that it’s not nice to compare yourself with other people but in this case, it’d be a good idea to do so. When we say compare, we mean to think of those who are in worse situations than you. You might think that you’ve been handed the worst hand in life but there are so many more people out there who are more unfortunate than you. So whenever you’re feeling down in the dumps, take a moment to reflect on what you have instead of what you don’t or what you’ve just lost.

4. Seek the company of your loved ones

Nothing works better to uplift one’s spirit than the company of their loved ones. When you surround yourself with those you love be it family, friend, or significant other, your mood will instantly improve as having them by your side will provide you with the strength to face any upcoming obstacles or resolve any issues you might be having. Besides, having someone else’s perspective on whatever’s troubling you might just help you to get over it quicker.
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5. Treat yourself

Apart from the four methods discussed above, we’d also like to suggest that you pamper and treat yourself as a way of improving your mood. For this to work effectively, you’ll need to banish all worrisome thoughts from your mind for a few hours at least (or for as long as you need) and just enjoy yourself by doing things that make you happy. It can be cooking a delicious meal for your family, shopping for
custom-made
gifts
, or catching the earliest movie showing. Once you’ve managed to calm your emotions, you’ll be able to think more clearly and the world won’t seem like such a horrible place after all.

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To the brave mother with a terminally ill child…

When my friend’s son was diagnosed with cancer the first time, I wonder how intense the pain she felt was. When he recovered, I can only imagine how her joy and relief must have soared.

And, when he was diagnosed with cancer for the second time – this time aggressive, fast and deadly – I don’t dare imagine how she felt.

Living every parent’s worst nightmare, how did she feel knowing that he was dying this time? What agony did she feel in her heart and soul knowing that she won’t ever see him graduate, fall in love, reach for the stars? That she can’t kiss the pain away this time?

How did she cope when she saw him slipping away, not knowing if she could hold him again tomorrow?

From where did she gather the strength to keep living when her child took his last breath?

I can’t imagine. I just can’t.

How do you go on when you know your child won’t? | image: Shutterstock

This is what I want to tell her, and every mother out there with a terminally ill child.

I don’t know your story. I don’t know the depths of your pain and sorrow as the mum of a terminally ill child. I feel stupid saying “I’m sorry” because no amount of sympathy or pity in the world is going to make your child better. Or bring them back.

But as a mother, I know how you are hurting badly, because this is one thing all mothers share: we bleed emotionally when our kids hurt.

When my older son once split his head on the edge of a sharp-tiled step, I thought my heart would crack open too. Another time when my younger boy hit his head against the table leaving a gaping gash on his forehead, I swear I could physically feel his pain.

I’m not trying to compare these expected hazards of childhood to the experience of having a terminally ill child. Because both times, my emotional bleeding scabbed over fast, even though it was intense at the time. I knew my boys would recover. They have only faint, silvery scars left now to remind me of their injuries.

So, how do you go on when you have a terminally ill child, knowing that they won’t? How does your heart continue to beat?

After my friend’s son passed away, I tentatively asked her how she was coping. She gave me a small smile and told me:

It’s memories of him that keep me going. I celebrate his days of health, his beauty, his laugh, how he cared for his younger brother and sister. I go back to the time when he was a tiny newborn, a chubby baby, a cheeky toddler, a laughing preschooler. He only brought me joy so I refuse to give in to sorrow.

I know he would want me to be happy and strong to care for his brother, sister and dad whom he loved with his whole heart. I know he would want me to live my life with no regrets. The memories I have of him are pure happiness and it’s how I will remember him forever. It’s how I
want him to be remembered.
Not with sadness. Not with pain. Not with suffering.

She also told me the worst thing to ask a mother of a terminally ill child is about the disease. By doing this, you’re letting the disease win in yet another way. Instead, ask about the child. Put the child ahead of the condition.  Give the child importance.

It’s been five years since cancer took her boy. Yet, she remains one of the most positive, cheerful people I know. I will always be in awe of her.

I am in awe of all you mums with a terminally ill child. As a mother, I empathise with you and respect you. Your courage and strength, your love – nothing can match these qualities that have intensified in you a thousand-fold.

And on the days you’re feeling not so strong, perhaps this will give you hope: They say when a woman is pregnant, her unborn child’s cells
migrate
 to various spots in her body and settle there. After the child is born, these cells are forever carried in you. This is the secret behind that beautiful, mysterious mother-child bond that never dies, regardless of the passing of time.

Mums, your child is forever immortal within you.
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Cultivate Good Eating Habits From Young

Finding this all-time favourite nursery rhyme interesting enough to teach your children good eating habits?

Johny, Johny, Yes, Papa.

Eating sugar? No, Papa.

Telling lies? No, Papa.

Open your mouth. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Well, it could be one of the ways- but don’t give up if it doesn’t work for your children. There can be plenty of other interesting ways to instil good eating habits in them. Before this, let’s set our expectation right:

a)      Children may eat a limited range of food than adults during their early years of life, yet this can still cover all the major food groups. Some children “eat little but often”. Therefore, it’s absolutely normal if they eat very well one day and very little on a subsequent day. Forcing them to finish the food may just backfire, to the extent of causing them to hate vegetables even more.

b)      We can’t make children eat, but we can control what, when and where to feed them. Nutritionist Ellyn Satter suggested this before, “Children are responsible for how much and whether of eating.” Therefore, when children refuse to eat, it may have little to do with the food.

c)       Children prefer relaxed experience while eating- and to them, food is most enjoyed by eating slowly together with parents.  So, don’t rush them to finish their food!

Credit: Unsplash

How to set good eating habits

Of course, to teach children about good eating habits is not about preaching or forcing. Just learn a skill or two from the following methods (Who knows, they might work wonders on your children!):

1# Set yourself as a role model

Set aside some time from your hectic routine and eat together with your children. They will settle to eat if parents eat together at the same time. Amplify your enjoying fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and etcetera to “bait” them. You might want to bring along some fruits as snacks when you on the run, as well.  And always keep the positive spirits up in face of unfamiliar food and don’t show disgusted expression even the food isn’t to your liking.  This enables the children to take cues from you.

2# Get children into action!

One way to arouse your children’s thrill in eating healthy food is to involve them in meal planning. Hear their suggestions out for their meal preference, and guide them to come out with menus and grocery list. While shopping for ingredients, show them how to check for the information-such as nutrition labels and expiry dates-of the food is chosen.  Provide children with a few more choices to make, in substitution of the ingredients that can’t be found.  For instance, suppose you would like to prepare vegetable salad, but there isn’t any tomato available, you may suggest some choices such as cherry tomato or carrot for them to choose.

Besides, children will mostly enjoy preparing meals together with their parents. Grab the chance to teach these little helpers to:

Choose, scrub or even tear vegetables and fruits ingredients.

Add in ingredients.

Wipe and help setting dining table.

And trust me, by the end of the day, they will be more than happy to eat the fruits of their labour!

Credit: Unsplash

3# Schedule it

Always try to make it point to eat together as a family, and make sure every member keeps distractions away-for example turn off TV, Ipad, phones and others-during meal time. Besides, preschoolers need to eat every 3 to 4 hours- it will be ideal to prepare three meals, snacks and enough fluids to prevent them from getting famished. Let them pick up the habit of eating on time by setting regular time for eating.

4# Don’t fool and bribe

In order to grow children’s interest for vegetables, you might include it in the dishes of your children’s preference, and even hide the truth from them.  Please bear in mind that this is a fatal mistake, as they may feel hurt or betrayed once they figure it out.

Don’t be afraid to tell them that there is lettuce -the vegetable that they’ve never tried before- mixed in the special spaghetti you prepare. Just encourage them to eat it, with more enthusiasm. And if they start to take a small bite, consider it a good start as it takes them numerous attempts before they can accept a new food. So, don’t forget to acknowledge their “courage” with praise – “You tried a bit of lettuce. Good job!”

Also, be more considerate to the little tummies. Don’t force children to finish the food more than what they want. Don’t pressurize or bribe children with comments such as:

“Just take one more bite.”

“No dessert and no toys unless you finish this!”

“If you don’t finish the food, you’ll get pimples all over your face next time!”

“Eat up all the broccoli, and I will get you Haagen-Dazs ice-cream afterwards.”

5# Creativity makes the best

Play around with your creativity by preparing greater variety of foods- you should at least introduce a new fruit, vegetables or ingredient in weekly to keep children’s curiosity intact. More often than not, curiosity sparks off their interest.

Besides, imaginations can add colours to food, too. For example, you can easily decorate the children’s plate into shape of a clown’s face with spaghetti noodles, cherry tomatoes, and carrot sticks. Make your new dish even more memorable to children with funny names, for example “Spaghetti Clown”, “Apple Moon”, and so forth.

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Credit: freepik.com

6# Stop becoming a short-order cook

As parents, you are not obliged to cook something just to accommodate your children’s preference, as you are not running a restaurant. Instead, you can include something they enjoy eating-for example stewed chicken- in every meal, and encourage them to taste what you’re having- for instance, noodles with tomato sauce. Then, let them decide what and how much they want to eat. This way, they will learn to respond to their hunger and avoid over-eating.

7# Be easy on the juice

Variety of fruit juice can replenish the nutrients similar to the vegetables that children refuse. Still, it is not the best substitute for whole vegetables or fruit- and it contributes to malnourishment and obesity. Thus, limit the juice that they drink to only 120-180ml per day. Offer water to them instead so as not to affect their appetite.

To make vegetable appealing to them, you can try to “disguise” the vegetable with some sauce or macaroni, to name a few. Enlisting children’s help in planting vegetables will also making them more interested in eating vegetables, on top of giving them a sense of achievement.

Indisputably, eating well marks the first milestone for children’s ongoing development, establishing a solid foundation for their learning and growth.  Given the right expectation, patience and approach, it will not be impossible to cultivate lifelong good eating habits in children.

This article has been republished with permission from
Kiddy123
.

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Top 6 Things To Do In Genting Highlands For Families with Kids

We have so many long weekends and school holidays in a year that we’re practically number one in the world for being professional vacationers! But that also means that it’s a great opportunity for parents to bring their kids on short vacations throughout the year. One place they can consider is Genting Highlands – now with an extra kid-friendly hotel, Grand Ion Delemen.

Grand Ion Delemen has actually been open for about three years now and it’s starting to gain more attention as the busier part of Genting is becoming more costly and crowded. Grand Ion Delemen is still up in the highlands, but located slightly further away from the main attractions, giving you that luxury of privacy at a more affordable price for the whole family.

Here are 6 reasons why we think families with kids will love Genting Highlands:

1. You can enjoy a whimsical high tea experience at Fairy Tales Cafe

The Fairy Tales Cafe at Grand Ion Delemen is a really fun and colourful place for parents to bring their kids to. This al fresco cafe offers a cooling experience with the fresh air of Genting Highlands while parents have high tea with the kids. The kids can run around the astroturf area to explore the area and take lots of photos.

2. They can swim in an indoor heated pool

One of things about visiting Genting Highlands is that kids normally don’t get a swimming pool experience due to the cold weather. But at Grand Ion Delemen, the indoor pool allows kids to go swimming even if the weather outside is a little chilly. Better still, there are super fun floats for rent at the swimming pool so kids can enhance their swimming experience.

3. Take part in flying fox and challenge course

If you’re travelling with slightly older children, they will definitely enjoy the outdoor flying fox and challenge course which will get their adrenaline going. And don’t worry – you can join in the fun too, mummies and daddies!

4. Go on an educational Nature Walk

Find out more about your local flora and fauna in the world’s oldest rainforest when you embark on this educational Nature Walk. Get more details from the hotel’s reception about this. Just be sure to wear comfortable gear!

5. Visit Skytropolis Theme Park at Sky Avenue

Just because you’re staying at an accommodation a little ways away from the main attractions of Genting Highlands doesn’t mean you can’t still enjoy them! Grand Ion Delemen offers a complimentary shuttle all day long for its hotel guests so they can still enjoy the excitement of the theme park, the restaurants as well as the casino.

6. Enjoy a PRAWN extravaganza at Hugo’s In The Sky

The Hugo’s In The Sky promotion starts on 1st Oct and will last till 23rd Dec 2019. So if your kids love food (or if you and your spouse are huge foodies), then you will not want to miss out on this amazing promotion!

So what do you think, parents? Are you ready to take your children to Genting Highlands for your next holiday?

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Cultivating Future Trailblazers: Sparking Interest Among Children With First of its Kind STEM Carnival in Malaysia

In a bid to support Malaysia’s goal of growing the interest of children in STEM-related curriculums from its current rate of
47% to its goal of 60%
, the nation’s first STEM Edutainment Academy, 5T3M is on a mission to create greater awareness around STEM education amongst Malaysia’s young trailblazers by utilising gamification and interactivity.

 This is what 5T3M looked to achieve with the recent first-of-its-kind STEM Avengers Carnival targeted at children from ages 3 to 15.
 ]

While Malaysia is moving towards the future with technological advances, there is still a majority of our population who are unaware of the positive outcomes that STEM can provide to children. 5T3M’s
STEM education academy is designed to help children gain the skills required to succeed in the 21st century. This includes a wide variety of soft skills like critical thinking, problem-solving, teamwork, adaptability, creativity, digital literacy, and more.

The STEM Avengers Carnival which was held from June 4th to June 12th focused on allowing children to explore the multiverse of Science and Technology at their academy located in Starling Mall. The superhero-themed carnival looked to cultivate children’s inner creativeness through 5T3M’s gamification and application-based workshops and activities.

5T3M believes this unique approach to science and technology helps drive children’s natural curiosity,  passion and creativity rather than rely on a rigid curriculum. With 1000 participants attending the carnival, the event has been viewed as a stepping stone to further
solidify 5T3M and STEM subjects within the community.

 “
As a team, it was great to see our slots fully booked throughout the week. We genuinely believe STEM is the way forward for children, families and the nation as a whole. We know there is more to be done to keep the cultivation alive to build these trailblazers for the future and equip them with the required knowledge to solve real-life challenges
, “said Mr EH Lim, Founder and CEO of 5T3M Edutainment Academy and Centre.

The nine-day carnival
was focused mainly on creating an environment for children to ‘play and learn’ about
robotics, coding, Artificial Intelligence and Internet of Things (A.IOT), sciences and entertainment tech
through engaging activities. Some of the mini-challenges included were to empower children to complete these missions using simple problem-solving skills, develop their motor skills by piloting drones and experience technology via virtual reality (VR) and 3D printing. Through these activities, children were not only able to explore the multi-dimensional world but also
develop and strengthen their cognitive skills.

Beyond this, to provide better insight to parents who attended the STEM Avengers Carnival, 5T3M also invited guest speakers to share more on the evolving STEM sector in Malaysia.

Some of the speakers include
Chui Ling
, a celebrity entrepreneur, host, speaker and TV personality,
 Eleanor Cheah
, a computational thinking specialist, master trainer, and educator,
Mohd Farid Mohamed
, 3D Printing specialist, master trainer and chief technical expert at Cuberlab, and
Paul Siew
, a specialist in product and industrial design and founder of Formventor.

In Chui Ling’s session,
‘Does My Child Need STEM’, she commented, “
Understanding STEM helps kids thrive in a tech-heavy environment. With the rise of the technical and digital age, kids need to have a basic appreciation and knowledge of STEM to succeed in an ever-changing world and to be solution-oriented, enabling them to float rather than sink in any situation
.”

Meanwhile, Eleanor Cheah echoed similar sentiments, stating, “
In a space like 5T3M, children are able to learn future skills to not only be future-ready but to also have transferable knowledge which can be used in their everyday life. For example, coding helps children problem-solve. Understanding computers and learning the basics of coding helps children to develop an appreciation of how things work. It also teaches them how software engineers use maths in order to solve problems in a logical and creative way
.”

Experiencing a significant increase in walk-ins over the last few months, rising about 50% from month to month, 5T3M is in the midst of rapidly growing its presence in the local scene.
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 The success of the academy can be attributed to the researched and futuristic educational approach which emphasises individual development with modern technology for children. Creating a conducive learning environment, 5T3M hopes to carry forward this effective strategy by bringing in-home STEM experience with their eTutor programmes’ home-based learning tools.

Disclaimer: You are not allowed to share this article on any other website or on Facebook without providing proper credit and the original article link on
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8 Ways new dads can support breastfeeding mums

New dads are usually as eager as anyone to begin their journey along the long winding path of fatherhood. While they may be eager to be the best dad they can be, a lot of dads get discouraged knowing that there’s not much they can do to aid their wives while they nurse their newborns…or is there?

Actually, there’s quite a lot that new dads can do to help and support their breastfeeding partners. Of course, you won’t be able to take the responsibility of nursing directly out of the hands of your wives, hubbies. But, there’s still a lot of ways in which you can make the nursing period as comfortable, easy, and carefree for your partner as possible!

Check out this helpful list of ways you can support your partner as she nurses your children and learn how to be your wife’s knight in shining armor when needs it most:

1. Attend a breastfeeding class

If you attend a breastfeeding class with your partner, you’ll be able to offer valuable information when needed, and help her feel more confident about addressing the situation as a whole. Knowledge is power, so if you
and
your wife have been armed with helpful tips and tricks when it coms to breastfeeding, there’s no doubt that you’ll be of great help when it’s time to start nursing your child. Just make sure that you take the course as serious, if not more, than your wife so you can help her as much as possible.

2. Develop the skill of recognizing your newborn’s hunger cues

Your baby’s source of nourishment may come from your wife, but that doesn’t mean that the responsibility of recognizing when your baby is hungry relies solely on her. If you attended any breastfeeding classes, there’s a strong chance they taught you or guided in the right direction of learning how to detect and anticipate your baby’s hunger cues. Be observant and take note of the signs and indications of your baby’s hunger. Help to make t easier to care for and nourish your child.

Find out ways to take your parenting skills to the next level, dads! Click next to learn more!

3. Cater to your wife’s needs

When it comes to breastfeeding and nurturing your child, it’s important to know that you’re the sidekick. As valuable as you may be, she runs the show and so you should do what you can to make sure she’s happy, comfy, and has everything she needs to properly nourish your child. This means that while she’s breastfeeding you should be giving her your full attention and be willing to be flexible when it comes to her needs. Address her problems, and cater to your wife’s needs when she’s breastfeeding. It’s the least you can do.

4. Keep the pump parts and bottles nice and clean

For the most part, it’s the little things that go a long way. One way you can help your wife during the breastfeeding stage is to take some of the smaller responsibilities out of her hands. She’ll be pumping quite often, and one less thing to worry about is keeping those pumping parts and bottles clean. It’s a small gesture, but it’s one less thing for her to focus on and she’ll be appreciative of that. Guaranteed.

5. Help out around the house

Along with those pump parts and bottles, you should strive to keep things around the house clean and in order. She’ll have a lot on her mind, and she’ll be genuinely exhausted all the time. Not to say that you won’t either, but if you want to extend your helping hand out as far as possible, doing your fair share of cleaning, laundry, cooking, etc. is a great way to say thank you for doing an awesome job nurturing your children.

Find out ways to take your parenting skills to the next level, dads! Click next to learn more!

6. Change the baby and burp him/her when needed

You and your partner may have a system in line for keeping diaper duty even. However, if you really want to be a big help and take your dad skills to the next level, you should go above and beyond your shift and help change the baby and maybe even burp them more than usual. Your wife gets to spend unique bonding time with your baby when they’re nursing, so think of changing and burping your child as a way to make up for that mommy only time. It can be your own unique, albeit dirty, bonding time with your baby.

7. Embrace skin-to-skin

You don’t have to simply stick with “dirty work” like diaper duty if your want to spend time with your baby. Another way for new dads to get some bonding time with their children is to adopt the skin-to-skin technique. The benefits of this technique are already pretty well documented, so there’s really no excuse for new dads to not try it out ad get to know their baby a little bit better.
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8. Be a positive, encouraging breastfeeding coach

If you took the time to try out those breastfeeding courses with your wife, then you probably picked up some much needed information on the topic. So, with that knowledge in your arsenal, you should work to offer as much help as you can to your wife. But, being a good breastfeeding coach goes beyond that. A good breastfeeding coach will remain optimistic, and will encourage his wife every step of the way. You should always tell her how great of a job she’s doing, and support her spiritually and physically as she breastfeeds your child.

[H/T]
Mom.Me

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7 Signs That You Are A Good Parent To Your Kids. Kudos Mom And Dad!

Who’s a good parent? You are!

Modern parents these days hold themselves to significantly higher standards than when our parents were raising us.
We struggle to do the best we can, afraid that we’re failing our kids. Are you always worried about being a good parent to your kids?

It’s just so tempting and easy to compare ourselves to friends, relatives, or even social-media-famous parents. We should stop seeing other parents as a measuring stick to our success. Instead we should look at our kids and how they’re doing, physically, mentally, and emotionally, as our measure of whether we’re being a good parent or not.

If you’re parenting with the love and compassion that comes freely and unconditionally, then everything else follows.  Good
parenting skills
 are probably the best thing for out dear children right now.

Clinical psychologist
Nadene van der Linden
 says that there are seven signs we’re doing alright as far as being a good parent is concerned.

7 Signs That — Yes — You’re Being A Good Parent

It’s easy to know whether you’re being a good parent or not. | File photo

1. Your child shows you a range of emotions

Children can be volatile when they’re discovering
big emotions
. They may be difficult to handle sometimes, but your child’s willingness to express anger, sadness, guilt, or fear in front of you is a good sign. It means they feel emotionally safe with you. There is no fear of being judged or scolded.

Parents should be worried when their children hide their feelings from them. This is often a sign of the child’s lack of trust in you, and probably a deeper problem in your relationship with them.

So do not shut them down. Pay attention to them. Show them that you appreciate them and that they don’t need to be afraid of expressing how they feel. Show them that they can trust you.

You can say “I can see from how you’re destroying your toys that you’re very angry. And you’re telling me this is because your sister won’t let you play.” It shows that you understand what they’re going through, and that you can handle their emotions.

2. Your child goes to you when they have a problem

You know you’re being a good parent when your child comes to you for advice or comfort when they have a problem. This means you have built a strong bond between the two of you that’s based on trust. You provided your child with a secure space that your child can go to when they’re feeling vulnerable.

That’s what homemaking is all about, after all. For them, you are
home
.

Encourage this by welcoming your child with open arms, whatever the circumstance, and listen to their problems. They may seem small or petty to you, but if you dismiss the small ones, then they won’t go to you for the big ones.

3. Your child discusses thoughts and feelings with you without fearing judgment

This means you and your child have an accepting, open, and flexible relationship.

Some parents unwittingly make the mistake of restricting communication between them and their children.
This can be by overreacting to their children’s thoughts or feelings, or by telling their kids to shut up when kids criticise them.

If they say something like “I don’t like brushing my teeth,” you don’t need to scold them about it. Ask them why first and tell them nicely what would happen if they don’t brush their teeth. Having healthy, decent discussions with your children helps build respect between the two of you.

4. Your feedback is non-critical and non-labeling

A good parent avoids labels like “naughty,” “ugly,” “greedy,” “lazy,” “fat,” or “bad.” Parents should also avoid labels or stereotypes by pointing out something as too “girly” or “boyish.”

Giving too much critical feedback boxes in your child, represses them, and puts pressure on them to be people you
prefer
 instead of love. And when a child is repressed and pressured, they might go off and release that pressure later on in ugly ways – like an unexploded landmine.

If your child ruins the cake in the fridge, focus on the behaviour (“You did a bad thing”), not the child (“You are a bad boy”).

5. You encourage your child to pursue interests and talents

When children pursue their interests and practice their talents, they feel a sense of achievement. It gives them something to focus on, not because they were forced to do something, but because their interest resonates with what they want and who they are.

Encouraging your child’s interests and talents positively engages them through their teen years, up until their young adult years. It teaches them persistence and perseverance, and give them a greater sense of fulfilment.

It’s not good to direct your child’s interest to fulfil
your
unrealised dreams and needs. Forcing them to excel at something they don’t want can only lead to disaster, even when they appear to be doing well.
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6. You create boundaries on behaviour to keep your child safe

A good parent guides their child’s behaviour by setting down healthy boundaries and limits. Without knowing their boundaries and limits, children grow up either entitled or unable to tell when people or walking all over them.

Teach them that there are limits to what they can do to/with other people, and there are limits to what people can do to/with them. They can’t just take their classmate’s stuff. That’s a boundary. And certainly, their classmates can’t just take their stuff as well. That’s a boundary, too.

These boundaries range from ethical and moral boundaries, to etiquette (respectful language), to routines (brushing their teeth).

7. You fix your mistakes

The willingness to acknowledge your mistake and fix it is a sign of a good parent. It tells your children that you value them more than your own ego. So when you do something that’s out of line, whether you yell, overreact, or insult your child, fix it.

Talk to your child, admit your mistakes, and tell them you want to make up for it. You can ask them what they’d wish you had done instead, because it takes into account their wants and needs, instead of making it all about you.

What Good Parenting Skills Is All About

Being a good parent is not about whether your child has a diet that befits an athlete or has high grades. It’s about having a healthy relationship with them as young people, setting the stage for a closer, more secure relationship as they grow older.

This type of relationship creates an environment where your child can thrive and become a well-adjusted teenager and then an adult. Having a relationship based on external factors like beauty, intelligence, or academic achievement is no match to a relationship based on love, respect, trust, and compassion.

So who’s a good parent? You are.

Source:

Motherly

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Here Are How Two Doctors Raise Their Child To Be Resilient

You would think in a household with two parents as doctors, it would be a highly sterile and clean environment. But not with Dr. Angel Ho and her husband.

In fact, the dynamic doctor duo believe that kids need to grow up in an environment that allows them to explore and become more resilient. They define resilience as the ability to overcome or bounce back from any obstacles.

The
Five Pillars Of Resilience
 they adhere to include Adaptability, Resourcefulness, Perseverance, Self-Reliance and Daringness.

“My husband and I are very busy. We work in the same hospital. But everything we learn as doctors is not applicable to parenting. We learn so much about illnesses only. Parenting is something we had to learn on the go,” Dr. Angel explains.

The pair met in medical school. They got married and had their two boys. Dr. Angel’s eldest son is almost four while her second is over a year old.

But years and years of medical school could not prepare them for the parenting journey ahead.

Too clean is not always a good thing

“There is this thing called the Hygiene Hypothesis. If you keep your kids in an environment that is too clean, they can develop allergies and are unable to develop their immune system,” Dr. Angel says.

Children need to build robust immunity when they are young, as this allows them to explore the world. From their explorations and experiences, they’ll learn about resilience in the long run.

“We believe strong immunity allows our children to explore the outdoors. And what they ultimately gain are the basic lessons in how to be resilient,” she elaborates.

As long as it’s not dangerous, Dr. Angel and her husband raise their sons in this manner to ensure they are ready to face real-world experiences in the future.

Preparing them to be ready for any situation

One of the reasons for readying her children to face any situation is because Dr. Angel herself grew up in a very protected environment. “I am an only child and my mum was very protective. Even when I left for college, I couldn’t even prepare myself a simple meal or operate a washing machine,” she shares.

“So in my house, my children do simple cooking, dishes, washing as long as we supervise them. You can do everything for them, but one day when you’re not around anymore, then they’re not prepared for the future,” Dr. Angel says.

Resilience is important for children’s growth and future because of its Five important Pillars – Adaptability, Resourcefulness, Perseverance, Self-reliance and Daringness.

Two of the most important qualities Dr. Angel believes children should have are Adaptability and Self-Reliance. “Things are always changing. We raise our children to prepare them to be Adaptable and accept and embrace new things and use them to their advantage,” she adds.

For instance, she will always try to expose her children to different environments to test their adaptability. Whether it is helping out in the kitchen or introducing them to a new playground, it tests a child’s ability to integrate with their surroundings. Even when they face conflict, Dr. Angel doesn’t immediately run to the rescue, she allows her sons to develop a sense of self-reliance to get out of a sticky situation. She only steps in to help if they are in danger.

One method of parenting she believes is effective in helping to develop self-reliance is explaining and reasoning with her children. Children who understand reasoning are able to trust their instincts in the future and be Self-reliant.

For instance, an important takeaway lesson Dr. Angel imparts is how she reasoned with her son not to play with the knives in the kitchen. “Rather than just saying don’t touch or no, which will spark curiosity, we explain to them that knives are sharp and it could lead to them getting injured,” she explains.

This is how they learn right from wrong and good from the bad. Many of these things need to be taught when they are young as it would be harder to grasp later on in life.

The same goes for letting her son make or choose his own breakfast. “He goes to the fridge to take whatever he wants and if he makes a mess, then we get him to clean it up. That is also a lesson in Self-reliance.”

To date, Dr. Angel and her husband boast two healthy boys who are being raised to be Resilient with this parenting style.

Resilience is a crucial factor in determining future success. Both Dr Angel and her husband see resilience as an aptitude that can be grown and developed over time; as a mechanism for facing life’s challenges by first providing a foundation in immunity.

One of the ways to develop said foundation is through a diet that takes into consideration the importance of prebiotics and probiotics – resilience against sickness and disease can offer your child a much-needed boost.

Secondly, apart from choosing healthier foods and beverages, formulated milk powder for children like AptaGro™’s Step 3 and Step 4 are formulated with a patented combination of Prebiotics and Probiotic along with important nutrients to help to support physical and mental development so children are better prepared to make the most of life’s opportunities.

Ultimately, the objective is to help our children absorb life’s most important lessons – to Persevere in the face of difficulty; to be Daring with novel solutions when solving problems; to be Resourceful with available assets; to be Adaptable to changing situations, and to do it all independently with Self-Reliance.

These qualities can be best internalised when our children have a healthy body and mind, as a result of combining both immunity with specialised nutrition. As they mature into adulthood, they will be better equipped to overcome the obstacles that lead to success. This is Dr. Angel’s ultimate goal and one that will secure her children’s wellbeing.

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Choose The Right Musical Instrument For Your Children

Children nowadays are really busier than adults, aren’t they? I bet you’ll agree with me about this, just by looking at the daunting learning schedule they have. However, there is one thing that most parents will still do for their children regardless of how busy the children are- enrolling them for talent classes, especially classes to learn musical instrument.

Well, I think most of you will know better than me about what are the benefits that music can bring upon your young ones. Confidence, discipline, patience, social skills, and cognitive skills such as memory and brainpower, to name just a few, are some of the general benefits that music can bring upon your children.

Credit: Shutterstock

However, have you ever realized which music instrument that your children will enjoy the most? Is it really good for us to decide what the best instrument is for them to learn, solely based on the most popular instrument learnt by others?

Read more:
 Baby genius? Listening to music in the womb

Priscilla Dunstan, the author of <Child Sense>, perceives that children will gravitate towards certain musical instruments based on their five major senses, namely sight (visual), hearing (auditory), touching (tactile), taste and smell.  These are the kinds of senses that children have to rely on in order for them to learn; however, there can only be a particular dominant sense they depend on when learning is concerned. So, let’s find out the types of children’s learning styles and suitable musical instruments for each:

Visual Learning

Find your children hard to understand what you teach without any illustration, image or flashcard? Always tell you about all their fancy imaginations based on what they observe? Can recall almost perfectly just after a glance? Well, most probably they are the visual learners who will only learn the best through visual aids.

Visual children prefer order and perfection- and this will definitely save you from the hassles of tidying their room! (
Chuckle
)

Credit: pixabay.com

So, the piano will be the most ideal musical instrument for them. The thought of being able to dance their fingers on the keys along with rhythmic musical notes certainly will fascinate them. Besides, they will be glad to emulate the pianists as they play gracefully, composedly and orderly. Furthermore, being able to play the piano well will constantly put them in the limelight, especially among family members and friends. And this serves as a strong motivation for them to play the instrument well!

Auditory Learning

Do your children like to hum the rhythm of music, recall what they have heard, and able to use oral language effectively? If it is a positive answer, then your children will most probably have a soft spot for a string instrument.  Born with a better sensitivity towards sounds, they can easily grasp the ways to play with strings in order to make music note sharp of flat.

Credit: needpix.com

Apart from that, they indulge themselves in the freedom of creating their own music- and string instruments do provide them such freedom. So, for auditory children, you should nurture their aptitude for music by giving them more freedom in their musical learning.

Tactile Learning

Characterized by learning through physical touch, tactile learners will more likely opt for the instruments which are physically demanding such as drum, trombones, cellos or others.  They like to learn by manipulating objects and through hands-on experience.

Credit: needpix.com

Besides, they prefer to engage themselves in interactive group learning- which makes them inclined to conform to guidelines or regulations. Fuelled with the passion to be part of the performance with the audience, they have the potential to make a good band and orchestra members.

Taste and smell Learning

Children who learn through taste and smell are branded as the “imaginative wizards”. They can easily sink in the ocean of imagination when they listen to the sounds especially from flute or harp. Therefore, music definitely makes the best channel for them to express their feelings and harness their sensitivity if they are taught with the right musical instrument.

For sure it’s good that we cater the suitable musical instruments to their learning style and learning interest. However, while we are trying to find out the right instruments for them, it is advisable for us to expose them into a variety of music styles, for instance classical, Broadway, pop and soothing music style. Observe their expression attentively as sometimes children may display a strong liking for the specific instrument the first time they hear it.

If you don’t have a tight budget, perhaps you can consider sending your young ones, especially toddlers or preschoolers, to kids’ music centre such as Kindermusik. This helps them to foster a love for music, rhythm and self-expression, enabling them to appreciate music much better, before they delve into the specific musical niche. Alternatively, you may also consider renting instruments for your children to explore. They may change their mind several times before they commit themselves to just one instrument.

Of course, you must still be ready to invest in small down payment and monthly payments. However, this investment is surely worthwhile if you view it in long term. You won’t want to spend so much effort and money, only to find our children don’t really enjoy the music course we find for them- and worse still, you still will repeat this over and over again as long your children still don’t find a suitable one.

So, give your children a platform to seek out their own musical expression, as sooner or later the instrument will finally answer to them!

This article has been republished with permission from
Kiddy123

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Father slips and accidentally crushes his son

A sweet moment between a father and his son quickly turned south after the father slips on his child accidentally.

Father slips and crushed his child

The video shows a father playing with his child inside a supermarket in China; his son was swinging from his arms behind him, but then the father slips and falls on his child. A woman that was standing beside them immediately helped the father get back up, and then lifted the injured child and gave the boy
back to his father.

According to a report by Guangdong Television, the boy was immediately taken to the hospital, wherein he was pronounced dead.

According to a paediatrician from Guangzhou, “In the video, the man’s entire weight was on the upper body of the child, including the boy’s head and neck. The child might have suffered a cervical fracture.”

The doctor adds that people with no medical training should refrain from moving anyone with a potential cervical injury.

The video has gone viral

The video of the child’s death has gone viral in China, and has also been shared numerous times worldwide.

You can watch the heartbreaking video below:

Playtime safety tips

While accidents like these are unpredictable, you should never put yourself in a position wherein you might slip and fall on your child. In this case, just one slip meant the end of the child’s life.

That’s why, even during playtime, it’s important to keep your child’s safety a
 top priority.
 Here are some tips that you should always keep in mind when it comes to playtime.

Always keep an eye on your child
 – Keep your child close to you or within sight at all times.

Store all of your child’s toys in a safe place
 – Don’t leave your child’s toys lying around after playtime. Use a large container where you can store all of your child’s toys so that you and your kid don’t accidentally trip and fall.

Keep your child’s play area safe
 – Any sharp corners or hard edges can potentially injure a child, especially if they like running around. Use protective pads or foam protectors on these sharp edges.

Play games that are appropriate for your child’s age
 – Some kids like it when
their parents
 toss them around, but it can be potentially dangerous, even if you’re being careful. Make sure to only play safe games with your child and don’t do anything too risky.

Sources:
straitstimes.com
,
dailymail.co.uk
,
sheknows.com

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What food should I eat to conceive a baby girl?

Whether you’re a first-time mum or a mum of boys, then you have likely gotten to a point where you wondered what it’d be like to have a baby girl. There are no easy tricks to choose your baby’s gender outside of a laboratory. But some research is backing the possibility of influencing conception through certain lifestyle changes, like choosing specific food for conceiving a baby girl.

Food for conceiving a baby girl: Is there an effective diet to influence my baby’s gender?

How do you choose food for conceiving a baby girl? Make sure they’re rich in calcium and magnesium!

According to a
study
 by Maastricht University in The Netherlands, a mum’s diet plays a role in controlling conception. The researchers claim that food for conceiving a baby girl should be
rich in calcium and magnesium
.

Foods rich in both these nutrients are yoghurt, tofu, spinach, broccoli, beans, almonds, cashews, and oatmeal.

When it comes to food for conceiving a baby girl, researchers warn against eating too much salt and potassium. Their advice is to
avoid food like processed meats, bread, pastries, anchovies, bacon, salami, olives, shrimp, and potatoes.

Food choices aren’t the only determining factor!

The study clarifies that these types of nutritious food for conceiving a baby girl should be coupled with planned sex — or intercourse before and after ovulation — to get the desired results.

The study involved 172 participant couples and researchers followed 150 couples through treatment and pregnancy. But only 21 strictly followed the instructions. Of this number, 16 women conceived baby girls successfully.

Still, the study’s authors believe they are onto something!

This is not the first theory the supports how parents can influence their child’s gender.
The Shettles Method
, which has been around since the 70s, claims that sex when ovulating will result in boys because “male sperms” swim faster. However, sex before or after ovulation can result in conceiving a daughter because “female sperm” is more resilient and can outlast male sperm.

Food to conceive a baby girl should be paired with timing sexual intercourse — before or after ovulation!

Some also believe that an acidic diet results in more acidic cervical mucus. Because of this, “female sperm” can thrive or last longer.

Others claim having lots of sex can help increase the chances of conceiving girls. Why? Because it decreases sperm count. Some even advise men to take hot baths before sex because “male sperms” don’t like the heat.

Though these theories need to be backed by further research, it’s interesting to know that mums and dads can nudge nature along in their favour.

It’s fascinating to imagine just how far science can take us in choosing our child’s future gender, but we should not forget that what matters most is that babies are born healthy. Be sure to consult your doctor before attempting any recommended “tricks” to influence conception!

Sources:
TIME
,
Livestrong
,
Reproductive Biomedicine Journal

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